Episode 684: Clifford Olsen Part III - Never Trust a Man with a New Hammer

there's no place to escape to this is the last podcast on the left that's when the cannibalism started what we're rolling rolling rolling we can't do it we rolled a lot in the old days this one's going out to the canadians that i had messaged me that dared to say the words that clifford olsen looked like pedro pascal and i just want to say what happened to you i want to see it i can kind of see if he was squashed by a giant boot like a monty python foot hit him in the head He looks like a Pedro Pascal action figure that was left in the rear view of your car. If you think that Clifford Olsen looks like Pedro Pascal, you need human touch. I'm going to say bee sting Pedro Pascal. Some guys look like bee sting versions of other guys. He looks like. But he's tiny. He looks like my memory of Pedro Pascal. I'm sorry, dude. I'm staring at him right now. He looks almost exactly like him. He does. He does. No, he doesn't. He doesn't, though. He has like a. No, I could see where they're coming from, but it's definitely like. It's a reach. If Pedro Pascal slashed tires for a living. Yeah, it's Pedro Pascal without the skin treatment. Pedro Pascal without the money. Pedro Pascal without the hair treatments. Without all the wonderful glam squad and all of the stuff. Without the hair treatments, I'm looking at two pictures right now, 30 years apart, and they have the exact same hairstyle. Look at that picture. Look at the next picture. He looks nothing like him. Welcome to Las Vegas. Podcast on the left, ladies and gentlemen. My name is Marcus Parks. I'm here with Pedro Pascal's number one fan, Henry Zabrowski. I love my bisexual lead. He's my bisexual lead. Call him the Glandalorian. Yeah, I heard that. Call him it for his cock. Can't pull Grogu off my fucking balls. And we have the man with the common sense, Ed Larson. How you doing? How you doing? I can't wait to watch Mandalorian and Grogu again. Just watch Grogu suck his own penis one more time. So brave. To full completion. Just one of them. People say that they don't have the balls to make art anymore. Yeah, not anything. Stuff that makes you think. Yeah. You know, I'm watching that little alien try to suck his own dick for 45 minutes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cookie, cookie, cookie, cookie. The whole time he's trying to suck and suck and suck. He's like, just use your telekinesis. Yeah. Ask your buddy. Come on, here we are, ladies and gentlemen. We're here at Clifford Olsen. Part three. Woo! Part trace. See? So when we last left Clifford Olsen, he just committed his first known murder at the age of 40 because his car had gotten stuck in the mud after he'd abducted and violated a 12-year-old girl. Or at least. Or at least that was the chain of events that Clifford described. Don't let anybody tell you life's over at 40. You can always change gears. Clifford had reasoned that he couldn't very well call a tow truck with a 12-year-old girl passed out in the backseat of his car. So the girl had to go before the tow truck came. But because Clifford Olsen had little to no experience in murdering another human being, the murder of Christine Weller had been a torturous, drawn-out affair. But as opposed to other serial killers who become more efficient with their murders as time goes on, the chaotic nature of Clifford's own soul would ensure that his murders would become only more protracted and cruel, each time he took a life. See, even though Clifford didn't commit his first known murder until the age of 40, he found that he liked it once he had finally taken the plunge. And because he was such a psychopathic narcissist, he looked at his victims as nothing more than playthings. They existed to satisfy first his own desires and eventually his growing sadistic curiosity. Let's open for nuance, though, Marcus. That's my whole thing, is nuance. When it comes to child murder, I think it's. I think it's super important to just know that sometimes kids are super annoying. That's a nuanced take. Yeah, that is a nuanced, yes, nuanced Henry Zabrowski. Thank you, every day. Now, Clifford's first known victim, Christine Weller, was the product of a so-called broken home. Wasn't anything intense. Her parents were just divorced. Her home life was hectic. But in 1980, having divorced parents drastically changed how the cops treated a case like Christine Weller's. It's so sad. It's so sad. Your parents get divorced and you get extra grilled by the police because your parents got divorced. Well, you get no attention from the police. Yeah, none whatsoever. The cops are just like, "Ah, never mind." See, when Christine's disappearance was reported to police by her father the same day she disappeared, the authorities gave him the same answer they gave to the parents of most of Clifford Olsen's victims. "She's a runaway, this happens all the time, she'll be back, stop bothering us, where's the need?" "She's the nearest Tim Hortons." However, I do think that before we get into this, we do need to get some perspective when it comes to the Canadian authorities in the 1980s, as well as some perspective on the laziness that we're going to come back to again and again for the rest of this series. See, we like to rag on Canada partly because Canadians live healthier, happier, and safer lives than what we live in America, and we are jealous. Sorry, guys, when we make fun of you, it's punching up. So you guys fucking suck. Fuck all of you fucking whores. Literally, they're above us. But, in all honesty, I think Canada's safety is what makes Canadians a little silly, it's why they have the best sketch groups in fucking history. But it also is what made Clifford Olsen so dangerous. Now, personally, it's hard for me to wrap my head around just how safe Canada has historically been. Because the gap between homicide rates in Canada and in the United States is so wide that it really does make you wonder what the fuck is wrong with America. It's just in our blood. Well, there's reasons behind it, but in 1975, for example, which is within just half a decade of Clifford Olsen's murder spree, Canada had 701 murders nationwide across a country of 23 million people. You know, that's more than I would have guessed. Yeah? Yeah, 701 the entire year. By contrast, in that same year, 1975, America had 1,645 homicides amongst the 8 million people of New York City alone. Hey, we invented jazz. Yeah, and all those fuckers were standing at the top of the subway stairs or some shit. They all went in a couple of building fires. So while it does appear that the RCMP was incredibly lazy over and over again when it came to the disappearances of these kids, cops are trained all over the world to look for the most likely solution when investigating a crime. And in Canada, murder was not even close to the most likely solution. Yeah, it was literally more likely like maple syrup heists and like a squirrel got a hold of your grandma's fucking medical ID bracelet. Yeah. These are the big crimes. Yeah. Lost in the snow. That's usually what it was. Big one. Can I mention tax evasion or something like that? Now, that's not to say there wasn't laziness involved here. The murders weren't well investigated, even when bodies were found. And rape allegations against Clifford Olson were repeatedly ignored. Ignored for decades. But in the minds of these investigators, a serial killer in Vancouver in 1980 was just about as likely as a rash of alien abductions. And let's just face it, rape allegations and rape investigations are still struggling across not just Canada, in the United States of America, obviously. The entire world. And so it is one of those where when it comes to sexual assault, that is a whole other kitten caboodle. It is. I don't like that term. Which sounds like a form of sexual assault against kittens. In Canada. Oh, where he's definitely, he's guilty of third degree canoodling. A caboodler? He's a caboodler. Yeah, that guy's a real caboodler out there. A caboodler is when you turn a child into applesauce. You put whiskers on it. Well, point is, when kids started going missing in the Vancouver area as a result of Clifford Olson, a suggestion of murder was most likely met with someone saying, "Hey, slow down there, bud. You don't want to be thinking this is America here. This is not what happens in Canada." Now, because Canadian authorities did not automatically suspect murder, Christine Weller's disappearance was forgotten. In fact, it was forgotten so quickly and so thoroughly that when Clifford Olson decided a few days after the murder to drive by the spot where he'd picked her up, her abandoned bicycle was still laying on the ground where she'd left it. In other words, it was like Christine Weller had never even existed at all. Aside from her own family's grief, her disappearance had been inconsequential, especially when it came to affecting Clifford Olson's little world. So Clifford immediately returned to picking up underage kids to drug and violate them on a regular basis. Because if making a girl disappear didn't get the attention of the authorities, then fucking nothing would. Yeah. Oh, I'd like to put this out there just for, you know, this is just for my own amusement. If someone could do some form of animation of Clifford, the big red dog, doing these crimes as we describe them, I feel like that'd be great for everybody. He's got no thumbs for the hammer. Exactly. In America, that bicycle would have been stolen. Now, Clifford Olsen did take a break in early December to take a trip with Joan to Hawaii for 10 days. But if you believe Clifford, the break really only benefited the people in Vancouver. Clifford claimed that during those 10 days, he raped and killed two children in Honolulu. But while there was no corroborating missing persons records, Clifford was arrested for pulling a knife on the owner of a Honolulu bar called the Rose and Crown. The charges were dropped, but police kept the knife in evidence. And when that knife was tested after Olsen made claims of murder in Hawaii, human bloodstains were indeed found on his weapon. But no murders have been definitively linked to Olsen's vacation. Honolulu can get fucked up. Yeah. I don't know if you guys have ever, like, seen the senior side of Honolulu. The last time I was there, I went in that neighborhood. I was like, oh, it happens here, too. Well, I always remember Mark David Chapman. He went out to Hawaii, went particularly insane out there. Hawaii's like, what do you get? That island fever. Yeah. Yeah, no, it seems like it would be perfect. But actually, it's like, be careful. It's still America. We brought, we exported America there. Don't worry. Christine Weller's body was eventually found on Christmas Day, 1980. The investigation was given to an RCMP corporal named Fred Miley, chief investigator of the. Serious Crimes Unit. Deadly, deadly serious. You want to go join the Silly Crimes Unit, you go join the Silly Crimes Unit. And honestly, I wish I could. But all the openings are taken because of the Silly Putty Riots of 1979. And how often people were stealing intellectual property using the mimicry ability of Silly Putty. In this building, we take crimes seriously. But in that building, we take crimes. Hilarious. Oh, you're hilarious. That's hilarious. That's hilarious. Go to the other building. Oh, what kind of crimes you investigate? Oh, you know, serious ones. Oh, Mr. Bragger. Oh, Mr. Important Serious Guy. This is why, this is why we make fun of you. It's just so easy. This is amazing. It's head of the Serious Crimes Unit. Corporal Fred Miley had developed a strange and wildly erroneous fixation on the homicidal habits of homosexual men. And he applied that fixation when the bodies of youngsters started popping up around Vancouver. Again and again, when the RCMP found murder victims, corpses that had been made and left by Clifford Olson, Corporal Miley's first instinct was usually to ask, but what if a homosexual had done it? Have you thought about that possibility? Because I think it's a very strong one. No, interesting. Now that we see the evidence laid out, all right, we see here, we got here, we have the, this is the bow and arrow used over here. We have, oh, this is the target that he was working on. He must have been a homosexual. It's just like this every day. There's never like, you never hear of like lesbian, like a closeted lesbian killing a bunch of lesbians. Never. No, no, no, it doesn't. It never happens. It never ever happens. That would be a hilarious crime. And that would need to be. That would need to be investigated in the building across the street in our flannel district. Can you please put that in the butch haircut department? That'd be great. Well, because of Miley's fixation, the RCMP focused their investigation into the murder of Christine Weller first on Christine's father as a result of suspicions that were aired by Christine's mother. Christine's mother had told the cops that she suspected that Christine Weller had killed her. Christine's father was gay because the two of them didn't have sex that often. And he seemed, wink, wink, to prefer the company of men to the company of his wife and family. So the investigation wasted a lot of time investigating Christine's father. Just wanted peace and quiet. Can I just watch hockey and fucking peace? I'm sorry. I don't want to fuck my horrible wife. And I like hanging out with my buddies. Yeah, guess I'm gay. I tell you what, every single time we went to investigate him, we just ended up hanging out. And I gotta say, that's the best gay hang I've ever had. That was just amazing just watching. It's just crazy to sit there with just a gay guy, watching TV, having some suds. I can't even believe it. I didn't know they just hung out. What do you know? They did the same thing the Drake guys did. We just went, oh my God. Oh God, no, no, no. Oh, Miley, you did it again. Clifford Olsen, meanwhile, became obsessed with the media coverage around Christine Weller's murder. And like so many serial killers before and after, he inserted himself into the investigation by repeatedly driving to the murder scene to chat up investigators. Yeah, what you doing over there? Yeah, what you got going on over there? You gotta tell me twice I have ADHD. You make that joke, but there are certain things in this episode that I'm like, this guy definitely has ADHD. He's definitely got it, yeah. I also think that genuinely what we brought up in the last episode is that he liked cops. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he really did. I mean, he liked cops, he liked being near them, because he just learned. He was always learning. Clifford also began testing the waters when it came to how much people would accept the rape and murder of a child. He actually asked his friend Ron. Like, hey, Ron, what would you do if you knew someone who'd, I don't know, raped and stabbed a girl? That's a funny hypothetical. Oh, you know, oh, there's one of those would-you-rathers. I hate trolley problems. Wow. So, yeah, so which one hits the priest? Ron said, like, no, of course I'd turn the guy in. But Ron also remembered that around Christmas 1980, Clifford was put in this hypothetical, to a lot of people, but it doesn't seem like anyone said, like, oh, you know, I'd be fine with it. Why do you ask? I'd love to help. Why didn't you call me before? I would have loved to have been there to hear her screams. Please let me hear the screams next time. Oh, more eggnog, please. Oh, very good. Everybody gets one present to open. Oh, good. Cliff got a new hammer. Oh, great. You know, you never trust someone with a new hammer. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, they don't know what they're doing if they show up with a new hammer. Interesting. Very interesting. Well, you're talking about that's a construction-like red flag. Yeah, I learned that. I learned that when I brought a new hammer somewhere. Ah. What, just some guys, like, never bring a new hammer around me. Yeah. Oh, so you some kind of new hammer-loving? I had a hammer. I brought it to work when I was working in the kitchen. And they were like, it was like a new hammer, because I'd never use it, because I don't know how to fix anything. And then my boss was like, never bring a new hammer anywhere. It shows that you don't know what you're doing. Yeah, but what are you supposed to do, it's not like you were cooking with it. No, it wasn't. I mean, it's fine, it was good advice. Yeah, it is. I was trying to give it to you, but you didn't take it. I'm not a handy person. Literally, I can't even take, like, advice about tools. I'm just saying, if you buy a new hammer, cover it in shit, and then show up somewhere. Bang it against a fence. Good idea. Now, after eliminating Christine's father as a suspect, the RCMP labeled Christine Weller as a broken home runaway, and the investigation never led to Clifford Olson. The nearest the cops got to Clifford was investigating a motel called the Bonanza, where Clifford was known to sometimes stay. Incredibly, police found a different creep staying at the Bonanza, who falsely confessed to raping both Christine and other kids in the area, and blood was found in this creep's motel room that matched Christine's blood type. God, poor Christine. I don't know, I don't, it was entirely false. Like, this guy had nothing, yeah, he had nothing. Separate horrible incidents. No, no, no, no, it just matched her blood type. This is before DNA, so it's just like, you know, they both had A-positive or something. I just have a hobby of getting called into police stations and getting free water. That's my thing, that's what I like. But since there wasn't enough evidence to convict this creep, and his polygraph tests were inconclusive, Corporal Miley decided that it was good enough to just know that this guy in the motel had probably done it. In other words, Corporal Miley marked Christine Weller's murder as "solved" in his own head, and he therefore moved on to the next investigation. That's where the Mounties always get their man, except if he slightly deviates and just slightly turns to the right and then they'll let their man go. It's not like Clifford Olson was not a known sex pest. The male and female teenagers that he drugged and sexually assaulted would often go to the police after the fact. Unfortunately, nothing would be done. If something was done, Clifford would always, and I do mean always, to weasel his way out of it sometimes he had help for example when clifford was charged with rape and locked up in january of 1981 he contacted a massive piece of shit attorney who has a massive piece of shit name bob chance and chance would eventually represent clifford in his murder trial the guy he's got the sideburns hanging in the back and he's got the cow god he's great call bob and you chance me going to jail you see him as a fat guy that wears a tie that's too short for him yeah it's like the pants are like right up under the tits yeah i know take a chance call chance we'll get you out of jail someone get me new pants because i just met bob chance you well in 1981 bob chance discredited the girl who accused clifford of rape by calling her a sex worker this absolutely worked because by the end of it clifford olsen was set free while the girl he allegedly raped got a warrant for prostitution not took the all right take the cuffs off of you put them on her like just in the same room well not even the birth of clifford's first child could stop clifford from committing more sexual assaults and i don't mean this in the sense that like clifford became a father and changed his ways i mean the actual event of his son's birth did not stop him reportedly while the other adults in his life were busy celebrating clifford's new baby with his wife joan clifford molested three children on the day his son was born you know my dad wasn't there when i was born but at least he was just eating arby's you know it kind of makes you yeah because i really it always kind of bothered me but hearing this have your arby's what's a beef and cheddar amongst family exactly idle hands and i've also i have been requested to correct the record my father was at the hospital when i was born oh that's nice your mom got involved i had misunderstood the story that my uncle joe had told and he was there oh that's so yeah do you think that clifford olsen could have used to switch what do you mean like a like a stick that his parents beat him with no the video game system i think that if that could have cut a lot of his crimes in half he could have been kept busy with with with quake yeah oh but yeah that's an x-com or even like one of those like mazes with a marble oh that's kind of it's 1980 yeah man would have been something like that oh cup and ball game yeah yeah give him a cup and ball game oh he's not an orphan no he needs something with lights on it that's a wheel with a stick oh yeah now clifford olsen never felt guilty for anything he ever did so for him the murder of a 12 year old girl only opened new avenues of criminal thought now that he knew he was capable of murder he started brainstorming with himself to see how he could use murder to his every advantage for a time clifford olsen thought about killing an x-con amputating the victim's hands and removing the skin to make himself a pair of gloves made from human flesh yeah that way he could wear these meat gloves while committing crimes and the fingerprints left behind would send investigators chasing after a dead man that's amazing that's a great idea i mean that's the first time i've heard it it's obviously gonna dry out yeah it's not actually a good idea yeah it is but it shows he's thinking he's in there well it's very high concept it's very high but clifford also learned that murder could be just another tool for getting out of jams that he and his friends would be able to do together he had created for himself or at least that's how it began because it soon became obvious that clifford olsen very much enjoyed the act of murder i don't want somebody else's hands getting to do it i think it's nice when it's my hands that's what i start to realize a bit like what who's gonna have bigger hands than me yeah i didn't want to get my hands dirty but then i realized when i put on the skin gloves there was blood it's still getting dirty i gotta wash my hands after using my gloves what are we even doing here i'll just rape him and kill him with my with my normal hands how did this gene fella do it how did he pull it off how do you crack it how do you fucking crack now clifford olsen did not immediately begin turning to murder to solve his problems but it still only took five months before he killed again this time however clifford was obviously planning to commit murder when he went out looking for a victim on april 15th 1981 right after the birth of his son this is actually not uncommon among serial killers it really isn't especially dennis raider was like that yeah a big a lot of them kill around the birth of a child it's very strange it's stressful gacy did as well yeah it's super stressful being a new dad one out one in i get it yeah jesus christ well after visiting joan and the baby in the hospital around 7 p.m olsen left to ostensibly go home to pick up fresh clothes for his wife instead clifford stole some syringes on his way out and left the hospital to commit murder he quickly picked up a 13 year old named colleen diagno from a gas station and pulled the same routine that he had on christine weller which this would become clifford's mo for almost every victim he told colleen just as he told christine that he was going to pay her ten dollars an hour which was fucking ridiculous in 1980 i remember the first time i made seven dollars an hour in 2002 in 2001 i thought i was a fucking millionaire yeah but he was going to pay her ten dollars an hour to wash windows for his construction company with other girls who all smoked weed while they did it but while clifford was giving colleen this spiel he was also giving her beers drugged with a sedative that he obtained legally again and again to treat his supposed insomnia he kept getting prescriptions for chloral hydrate doctors never ask questions clifford however he looks so sleepy he does you like his fucking idol pedro pascal clifford however had upped his con game by the time he picked up colleen to embolden his claims that he was the owner of a legit construction company he had printed even fancier business cards that had olsen and olsen enterprises embossed in an expensive holographic font but while some people would look at clifford's attempts to look impressive as the literal calling card of a con man the cards were impressive enough to fool people who didn't know any better i mean yet it fooled 13 year old girls but these cards also fooled other construction companies who fell prey to clifford scams over and over again i miss business cards you know but at the same time if someone hands me one it just goes right in the trash right in the garbage yeah i'm not doing not doing nothing with it i just fucking deeply embarrassed myself at a hangout so i went with cena very nice we went to this uh it was a host of the foreign report here on the network yes we went to a japanese cultural appreciation night where we had it was a record the guys were listening to records and they were having japanese whiskey it was really nice it was very classy way too classy we got fucking hammered and i met two lovely japanese businessmen and they there's a whole ritual around business cards there's like a whole thing i have no fucking idea so it's like when it first happened because they bow right they bow and you're supposed to take the business cards with the two hands from the guy and i was like because then they're like and so when i did there i'm fucking up the scene is like fix it and then i was just like but then i don't have a business card and the way they looked at me it was like literally like oh you're not a real anything yeah yeah you're not a man yeah yeah you suck and i was like yeah you used to have a fucked up business card what was it again well it was the massage one it was the one that was like it was a woman getting massaged by hands yeah now the murder of christine weller had long arduous and frustrating so clifford olsen claimed that he planned to try something different with colleen diagno after she passed out from the drug beers and clifford had committed the initial sexual assault instead of strangling colleen clifford tried using one of the syringes he'd stolen from the hospital to pump air into her bloodstream because clifford said he'd read somewhere that this was a quick and easy way to kill someone that's a lie we know he doesn't read it's also just not it is not quick or painless or easy way to kill somebody no but when olsen couldn't find an artery he got frustrated and gave up on that idea now colleen had woken up after being stabbed by a syringe over and over but she was still drugged so clifford drove her to another isolated location where he'd claimed to have just built a house since colleen was still under the influence she went along with it once they got to the location clifford told her they had to walk up a trail to a tree stump where he'd hidden a spare key but once they started the short hike and colleen's back was turned clifford decided it was finally time to try out the hammer he brought his claw hammer down onto the back of colleen's head burying the head of the tool in her skull but clifford claimed that the blood and gore that came as a result of this fatal blow disgusted him in fact he said he was too grossed out to become aroused again even though he'd really wanted to go one more time but since he claimed that the blood had turned him off he stripped the corpse naked covered it in leaves and sticks and burned colleen's clothes this would become clifford's cleanup m.o for most of his murders but incredibly After the murder, he returned to the hospital to see his wife and child. He'd been gone for just three hours. And even though he had blood on his clothes from the hammer blow, he managed to somehow explain it away. From what it seems like, Joan was more concerned that Clifford had been gone all evening, but had forgotten to bring her the fresh clothes she had been promised. Oh, all this red? Pomegranate juice. Yeah, pomegranate juice. I went to go get pomegranates. It's very healthy. They're a tricky fruit. Hard to eat. Took me three hours to crack it open. And once I cracked it open, I saw the little eggs in it, and I was disgusted. That's why I cracked it open with this here hammer. This here hammer, as you can see, it's covered in pomegranate juice. Colleen Diagno was from another so-called brokerage. So it took six days for her grandmother to even report her missing. The grandmother believed Colleen had been staying at a friend's house the whole week. But once again, police didn't even bother looking for Colleen because they immediately wrote her off as a runaway. The same day that Colleen was reported missing, though, Clifford Olson took his first male victim. And this was just six days after murdering his second female victim. Clifford's first male victim was a 16-year-old named Darren Johnsrud, who'd gone to college. And then he went to Coquitlam to spend spring break with his mother. Oh, you've never seen a mother take a fucking moose head like my fucking mother does. She'll took three in her mouth and she'll suck it down while the boys are doing it from her behind. I love doing spring break with my mother. I did forget for two seconds there that moose head is a beer. Yeah, as did I. I also had to make that. I was like, the fuck is he talking about? He's lost his fucking mind. Moose head is, it's fine. I do like it. It's fine. Well, Clifford picked Darren up at a gas station just as he'd picked up Colleen. And he gave the same construction worker speech that was now becoming routine. Supposedly, Darren was all in immediately on getting paid to drink beer and smoke weed while working, saying, hey, this is the kind of employer I like. God bless. I mean, you know, I'd always thought that Jim Wingacy was an anomaly when it came to contractors letting teenagers drink beer and smoke weed on the job. But judging by Darren's reaction to Clifford's offer, it seems like this phenomenon might have been more common in the 70s and 80s than I'd originally thought. I don't know. I've seen a couple of construction crew crews at my house that sort of really enjoy a couple of bottles of beer. You know, I've done it. You give it all. You know, it's great. Yeah. I mean, on the other hand, when I worked construction when I was 17 in the year 2000, like, you know, decades after all this, all the guys who put up drywall, they were doing meth on the job constantly so they could work for days on end without smoking. And those dudes really liked watching, like, extraordinarily graphic pornography on VHS tapes that they brought with them to the work. It was journeyman construction. We were all in Texarkana. We go back to this apartment that we're all sharing together. And all of a sudden, I'm watching, like, prolapsed assholes while I'm trying to eat my fucking turkey sandwich. This should not come as a surprise to me personally. No. I mean, also, you know, stereotypes are dangerous. But whenever there's, like, a harassing women PSN, it's always the construction workers. Every single time. Earth is just out there. You know, they're out there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, don't sleep on how dirty warehouse workers can be. Yeah, oh, and trust me, I worked in warehouses, too. As it was again, those guys were all so fucking filthy. Yeah, oh, yeah. First breasts I ever saw. I love watching them. You know, honestly, that's a good American working force. See, Henry, that's what you missed out from never doing any manual labor. Me and Ed did manual labor. We did manual labor jobs our whole fucking lives. I really missed out on doing manual labor. Yeah, yeah. I really missed out. No, I worked in retail where a lot of guys, a lot of weird older men and older women I met, I found out about their inside troubles. Oh, yeah. That's what I was. I was the, I was the, several people confessed to me their various whims and secret wishes and dreams. Oh, you were the dump. Yeah. Yeah. Hell yeah. And it's always about. It's sex. They'd be like, hey, go count all those nuts over there. You know, and I just have to sit in a fucking room and count screws and nuts. One, two, buenos cow. One. Now, as it was again and again, the dream construction job was just a lure for Clifford's next victim. After drugging Darren and taking him out into the country, Olsen laid out a blanket and raped the teenager repeatedly next to a dirt road. Clifford then led Darren to a nearby road. Riverbank, where he once again used his hammer to smash in Darren's skull. Now, either Clifford was lying when he said he was grossed out by the blood and gore during his second murder, or he got over it with extreme speed, because once Darren went down from the hammer blow, and this was just six days after Clifford had done this for the first time to murder Colleen, Clifford raped the teenage boy a second time. Darren, however, was not only still alive, he was still conscious and still sober. Speaking, Clifford said that Darren asked him why he was doing this over and over again, all while Clifford simultaneously raped him while he turned Darren's skull to mush with his hammer. Since Darren was presumably on his stomach, Clifford smashed the hammer into the side of the boy's head repeatedly, destroying Darren's jaws and teeth until the boy mercifully expired. But while Clifford Olsen had claimed that he found the blood and gore of a hammer murder disgusting, he had found that he greatly enjoyed having sex with dead bodies. And he said so during his early confessions. He would, however, backtrack that statement when he saw that while he could still work the narcissistic magic when investigators thought that he stopped at rape and murder, necrophilia was not something he could really charm his way through. It's so hard to. Yeah. It always sandbags the conversation. People get so angry. People get so uptight talking about, be like, oh, so well, oh, well, you like heated rivalry. I like fucking corpses. No one ever says like, what a charming necrophiliac. Not once. No, charm and necrophilia don't often go together. Personally, I think he was lying. I think that he is doing the thing that a lot of serial killers do, which is depending on who he's talking to, he's talking to them about the frame of mind of him and sometimes he wants to be as sick as fuck. Yeah. And he wants you to think he's sick as fuck. And then sometimes you want to be like, hey, you know, sometimes we all get out of hand. Like he wants both. No, he changes every person he talks to. Yeah, of course. Instead of moving or trying to cover up Darren's corpse, Clifford instead tried making a quick getaway. But there is one detail about Clifford that we have not yet revealed, and this might be a bit of a symptom of the ADHD. Hey, apparently Clifford Olson was one of the worst drivers to ever terrorize the roadway. And after taking off from Darren's murder site, Clifford almost immediately drove his car into a ditch. Clifford, he wasn't even drunk. This was just something that he did on a regular basis. I could just see him a lot of just like on like, oh, yeah, I'll tell you something. He was alone in the car. Exactly. Like, oh, another story. He's just like. He definitely lacks subtlety. And I imagine that leads to a lot of speeding and not being able to like. In your mind, register, you shouldn't put your foot down all the way. Well, just go and control the car or pay attention to the road. I would imagine he fiddles with the radio a lot. But that's just me. Well, Clifford walked to a farmhouse and paid a teenage farm boy $20 to tow his car out of the ditch with his tractor. But after being back on the road for just half a mile, Clifford ran his car into a ditch again. Since the teenager was already out with his tractor, though, he towed Clifford out for just $5 the second time around. Thankfully, the farm boy survived both encounters. He needed him. Yeah. Yeah. Now, once Clifford Olson got home from the murder of Darren Johnsrud, his wife, Joan, accidentally caught him sneaking his blood soaked clothes into the incinerator. He told her to mind her own business, which was all Joan needed to be told. But Joan apparently wasn't the only one who knew that something foul was happening around Clifford Olson. That night, Olson also called his mother. To unburden himself, which, according to Joan, was a common pattern. Clifford would commit a crime, then call his mother to confess and cry, while she presumably told him that everything was going to be OK. There's no such thing as a bad boy. Oh, that's my son. My son. Well, they obviously must have done something. They must have stole his ball. I don't know what those kids did. Joan actually asked Clifford's mother years later what these tearful phone calls were all about. But Clifford's mother would never give a direct answer. She would just say one sentence. She would say, quote, We can never tell. Joan, of course, took this to mean that Clifford's mother almost certainly knew that her son was a serial killer, and it said nothing. She's just a Canadian fucking Cersei. I guess all she is, just like sitting there like, yes, my son did do crimes, but Canada did crimes against him. You know he had ADHD. Now, when Darren Johnsrud was reported as missing, just hours after he disappeared, the authorities treated his parents with near contempt. Darren's parents said that the cops acted bored and resentful. And when Darren's father told the cop taking the report that Darren was 16 years old, the officer just stopped writing notes altogether. Cop actually closed his notebook and said, quote, He's a runaway. I won't even take his name at this point. It wasn't until Darren was missing for two full days that cops actually took the report. And they did so begrudgingly. I'm not going to ruin his time following fucking cheap chick around. You guys are all ruining his life. He's out there having the time of his life. I should have been following cheap trick. It should have been me. I'm the dream police. It's me. The cops were so adamant that Darren had run away that when his corpse was actually discovered about two weeks later, the cops actually tried convincing Darren's father that the corpse of the 16-year-old boy that they found rotting by the side of the road, that's not Darren. It can't be Darren. I saw him on stage. While they were doing the kids are all right. They were on there. I saw him on stage. I couldn't believe it. I was so jealous. I couldn't tell. Two guitars or one? I don't know. When is he playing the top one? Do they sound different? It wasn't until a week went by that the body was finally ID'd using dental records, at which point the cops had to sheepishly ask Darren's dad to come in and identify the body officially. It's just the idea of a sheepish. The word sheepish used to call to identify your son's body. Be like. Yeah, I'm sorry. Might have made a bit of a boo-boo. Remember when we were here a couple weeks ago? Just playing with his feet. Just like. So I got to tell you, I'm going to need to buy you Morsons after this one. Yeah, you do owe me one. Yep, that's him. Now let's go to the bar. Yep. And when the body of a 16-year-old boy was found raped and brutally murdered with a hammer by the side of an isolated dirt road, Corporal Fred Miley came as fast as he could. I know it's a goddamn homosexual! I knew it was a homosexual from the start! I could tell by the tire tracks! He said, clear-cut case of a homosexual revenge. Revenge kill it. And after discovering that Darren came from a divorced household, Corporal Miley decided that Darren was a promiscuous homosexual who'd gotten hooked on the dope, which made him, quote, susceptible to the apparent friendship of a homosexual pervert. And I should know! Why? Well, Corporal Miley, why should you know? No particular reason. But I know exactly what it takes to be the incredibly close friend of a homosexual pervert. Meanwhile, ten days after Darren's body was found, Clifford Olsen and Joan Berryman finally tied the knot at a house of worship called the People's Full Gospel Church. Oh, God! Oh, sir! I loved. You know, the feeder-gainer community is one of the least represented Christian sects. They really are, yeah. Yeah, we're feeder-gainer Protestants in our home. It sounds like they have a fucking buffet at this church. Oh! Oh! And Clifford, of course, marked the occasion by raping a five-year-old girl the night before the wedding while he was supposed to be babysitting her. Why anyone would let Clifford Olsen babysit a five-year-old girl, we will never know. I wouldn't let him babysit a milkshake. Cheap Trick is in town! That was my little girl! Cheap Trick was in town! I had to go! They never come to Vancouver anymore! They were only here once a month! I gotta go! All right? Yeah, I mean, I was thinking about this, and it seemed like, I was like, okay, so he marks occasions by celebrating, by committing a sex crime, but I don't think that's it. I think it's just that, like, occasions did not stop him from committing sex crimes. I think he just did no matter what. He was so prolific that it didn't even, none of it was even on the schedule. He seems like a guy that there's a lot more that we don't know about. Yes. And we're gonna get to that here in a bit. We always say that with serial killers. It's always, like, one or the other. It's always, like, way less or way more. Yeah, and it seems like with Clifford Olsen, it's way more. Now, just four days after his wedding day, Clifford Olsen would commit murder yet again after picking up a 16-year-old girl named Sandra Wolfensteiner from the mall in Guilford, just south of Coquitlam. Clifford Olsen's hammer would end her life as well, and again, police would not take the disappearance seriously. Furthermore, kids were reporting that Clifford Olsen specifically was drugging and raping them, with increasing frequency, but charges were not being filed. You're a runaway! I'm here! I'm right here! Why don't you continue to be a runaway and run away, okay? You're making work here! Well, after one girl reported the crime to her parents, who then reported it to the police, the cops made a note in their report that the girl was, quote, a little slow, implying that she was either lying, confused, unworthy of their efforts, or one of the police beat her in a foot race, challenging her, saying that if you could beat me in a foot race, I'll believe you're a rape allegation. Forgot how literal the Canadians can be. They can. Now, this might all sound like there are simply too many crimes here for this to be true. This all has to be a bunch of exaggerations, a lot of tall tales, but we actually have anecdotal evidence that Clifford Olsen really was as prolific as he did. He claimed to be. And that evidence came from you, the listener! Congrats! See, we usually get one or two emails during every Heavy Hitter series from people who either had a close call with the killer personally, or, more often, we get emails from people who knew someone who had a close call. We got it with Gary Ridgway. We got it with the Toy Box Killer. It comes, it's, it's like, you know, the spring rains always comes. But it, this was a lot. This time, we already, after just releasing one episode, have gotten many, many emails from people saying that their uncle, their mother, their mother-in-law, their whoever were picked up by Clifford Olsen, and they escaped, or they were almost picked up by Clifford Olsen. Which one was the funniest? Um, I would say. You're not supposed to answer. These never get to you. They never work on. That's the only thing I'll say, is we get these really serious emails, and they never try to make it funny for us. Actually, there was one that did try, actually did write it a bit, like, it was a bit rompish. Yeah. Like, it was a bit of a romp. The uncle. Oh, of course. Or maybe it was the mother-in-law. But, yeah. Because, yeah, because that's the thing, is that usually, it is the survivors, the people who have these run-ins, they're usually tough fucking people. Of course. Survivors. Yeah, the survivors, they're tough, they're smart, they see that things are about to go bad, and they do something about it. And, you know, they do usually, write entertaining emails. But, that's the thing, I've never seen anything like this. Like, the scale implied by the volume of these emails is truly astonishing. I'll say again, my leitmotif of this whole series is that Clifford Olson was a almost designed perfect villain for Canadian society. Yeah. Fly from your grave. Now, because Clifford Olson was allowed to run free, he continued to alternate between raping young teenagers before letting them go and raping young teenagers before murdering them. There was, however, seemingly no deciding factor as to when he would do what or why. See, Clifford had said that he used murder as a way to avoid rape charges, but the more that I've studied Clifford Olson and his methods, it really does seem that while his first murder might have been a matter of convenience, the killings that came after were more a result of him just being in the mood for murder that day. Yeah. If he didn't get his eight hours. Yeah. I know I am. Yeah. I mean, you really, speaking from experience, with ADHD, if you don't get enough sleep, I can be quite temperamental. I can be very difficult. Now, Olson waited a month after killing Sandra Wolfensteiner, but after deciding to do it again, he took the next two victims in quick succession. In late June, Olson skipped church on a Sunday morning, and he was killed. He was killed. He was killed on a Sunday morning to find a victim. Jeez. He was going to church this whole time? Yeah. No, no, he's got, yeah. You'd be surprised, Eddie, a lot of criminals go to church. You'd be really surprised at how many, some of them even lead the congregation. Yeah. I knew I fucking hated that place. It's almost like where you go to get forgiven for a bunch of stuff. Yeah, yeah. It's almost as if like building an entire religion around like just going somewhere and saying you're forgiven for anything that you do and your guilt is gone. It's really, it's a bad idea. Yeah. Just ask the Protestants. Yeah. Well, before the day was done, 13-year-old Ada Court was dead by Clifford Olson's hammer. This time, he drove his victim out to an abandoned mine shaft and killed her after he once again got his car stuck, this time in gravel. Once Ada Court's body was hidden, Olson paid some nearby campers to tow out his car this time. Ada was reported missing right away, but despite the fact that more and more disappearances were being reported and despite the fact that the corpses of the people of two teenagers had already been found, there was no wide search for Ada Court. She did not meet the requirements for a wide search. So after yet again feeling no heat, Olson started getting even more reckless and even more impulsive than usual. About a week after Ada Court's murder, Olson was on his lunch break from an actual construction job for once. Oh, wow. When he saw a nine-year-old boy riding his bike. Olson had targeted this victim because he thought that this boy, Simon Partington, was a nine-year-old girl because of his shoulder-length blonde hair. But with Clifford Olson, once that murderous machinery started moving, it was impossible to get it to stop. It was like those three times accidentally masturbated to Hanson. Was it each individual Hanson? Yes. I gotta learn my lesson. Oh, no. Oh, wow. The older sister, though. I was a child. Yes. Yeah, this didn't happen in your 20s. It was a new. Is that new? Yeah. I mean, now you can masturbate to them all you want. They're full-grown men. I masturbate to Chris Hanson. Have a seat. Now, even though Simon Partington was just nine years old, he was one of the few victims to actually refuse Olson's initial offer of a cold beer because, according to Clifford. He's trying to quit. No. Simon said nine-year-olds shouldn't drink beer. Oh. But Olson insisted and manipulated Simon into taking one, and events took a predictable turn from there. Yeah, more of a brown liquor little boy. But while Olson had decided on a whim to abduct and kill this nine-year-old boy, he was also starting to experiment. Once Olson got Simon out to a secluded spot and raped him, Olson strangled the boy with his belt, bracing his feet on the boy's back while pulling the belt taut around his throat. Olson then took out his four-inch buck knife and stabbed the boy in the chest. And then raped the corpse. After dragging the body off into some nearby bushes, Clifford Olson disposed of the boy's clothes and his murder weapon. He then drove back to Coquitlam, picked up some hamburgers, and went back to his bathroom remodeling job as if nothing had happened. Man, how long are breaks in Canada? You know what? It's a part of the whole thing. It really plays in all of Canada. All of it. When are we getting this bathroom done? I don't care. It doesn't matter. I've been pissing in coffee cups for days now. I think I told this story once when I was working on Heroes Reborn and we came back and we were already like a month over and the budget was like shooting through the roof and obviously we weren't going to be picked back up for a second season. And we came back and the entire crew was just watching baseball when we came back from lunch and they wouldn't stop. And they were literally like, no, we're just trying to finish the game. And we're all like, get us the living fuck out of here. Again, I love the energy. I do love the energy. I understand. I understand. We work too hard. I really think it was the CGI. It was the bad CGI. It was bad. That's what killed the whole fucking thing. That's what killed Heroes Reborn. No, not one sandwich in the whole fucking show. I know. I know. Since Simon Partington was so young and since he didn't come from a so-called broken home, his family were actually. Middle-class immigrants from England, he couldn't be written off as a runaway or branded as a sex worker as some of the others had been. So the RCMP had no choice but to take his disappearance seriously. And within hours of Simon's disappearance, a search party of a hundred people had formed to find the missing boy. But now that a middle-class white kid from a stable home had gone missing, the media finally caught up to the story of missing. missing kids in British Columbia. The story really got legs when people started calling reporters to tell them that the disappearance of Simon Partington was just the tip of a big, dirty iceberg that had been floating around the greater Vancouver area for nearly a year. This, it seems, is what finally shook the RCMP out of their stupor. See, as it sometimes happens in Canadian true crime stories, there was one cop amongst a sea of working-for-the-weekend invaders. There were investigators who tried shaking the other RCMP officers out of their mid-afternoon naps so they could actually investigate these crimes. In this case, the dedicated officer's name was Corporal Les Forsyth. Where other officers had called runaway on the disappearance of 13-year-old Ada Court, that's the girl Olsen had killed while skipping church, Corporal Forsyth was a young officer who'd actually investigated the report. He discovered, quite easily, I might add, that Ada Court did not fit the runaway profile. Probably had to ask, like, a question. Yeah, ask, uh, what was she like? Yeah, just a. Did she even listen to Del Shannon? Dad, I don't understand. What is that? Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah! Wah, runaway! Wow, Eddie! Jesus Christ! I like oldies. I do, too! I do, too! I'm not here immediately! I'm not here for you, not for him. Yeah, it's true. I just didn't know that name. You ever heard the Shannon and the Clams cover? It's incredible. Really? It's very, very good. I love Shannon and the Clams. Yeah, the great cover of Runaway. Well, now that Forsyth had a clue, I mean, I'd like to put a little bit of happiness into all of this. She ran away! Well, now that Forsyth had a clue, he decided to investigate all the people who lived in Ada's area who had sexual assault charges. Forsyth, therefore, became the first cop to come across the name Clifford Olsen in relation to these murders. And Forsyth very quickly got a hunch that Olsen was his man. Oh, the guy that spent most of his life in and out of jail for sexual assault of minors? Well, he had no. No, never from that. He had never. He had been in and out of jail many, many times, but no, had never, ever been actually charged. But he looked so innocent. Oh, you know, you'd expect him to be able to safely guide a little girl through the post-apocalyptic world of mushroom-based zombies, but actually, he's doing it to her. Let me ask you, how new does his hammer look? It's all covered in pomegranate juice. Now, Forsyth noticed that while Olsen had been charged with sexual assault multiple times, he had never been convicted, nor had he ever even stood trial for any of the allegations. Forsyth's hunch was only strengthened when he discovered that Clifford Olsen had been questioned for attempting to rape a 16-year-old girl the day before. The day after Simon Partington's disappearance. Forsyth then noticed that Ada Court was last seen in the same area where Clifford Olsen lived, which then led Forsyth to notice, hey, there's a whole bunch of missing or murdered kids popping up around this guy who is constantly accused of sexually assaulting kids, but always gets out of it. But he always gets out of it. See, that's the difference. He always gets out of it. That's what we like about him. So after Forsyth, deemed Clifford Olsen to be one of the greasiest hose heads in Vancouver. And that is a slur. You just said a Canadian slur. No, we'll have to bleep this in Canadian Instagram. Yes. He recommended that Clifford be regarded as the prime suspect in both the missing kids cases and in the murder cases for the two bodies already found. But Forsyth was a young investigator. And just like the cops had done to the guy who broke the Robert Pickton case, veteran investigators wrote Forsyth off as a young enthusiast. He didn't know you weren't supposed to give a shit about runaways. This is just like the Pickton case where cops weren't supposed to give a shit about sex workers. But that makes the Pickton case even more infuriating. Because while these two fucking serial killers were decades apart, both of these cases happen in the same fucking city. It's not that far apart. And the amount and the type of crime is so fucking similar. And that is just the truth is that they, they don't get a pass for me necessarily, but I do, I can understand the context here amongst the Clifford Olson case and the problems with the investigation. But the fact that then Robert Pickton just did it all again is very interesting. In the same part of the, very small part of the world. Well, I mean, it was, it really, like, Pickton, I mean, it's, Pickton lived in Coquitlam, but he was picking up all of his victims from East Hastings in Vancouver. I understand. I'm just saying the idea of like, by then, the planet should not have been, the idea of a serial killer should not have been off the table. Absolutely not. No. But then there was also, with Pickton, the question as to whether people were, let's say, they didn't mind that somebody was taking sex workers off of the streets. Oh, no, they specifically said he was cleaning up East Hastings. Yeah. Well, there was one veteran investigator who had faith in Forsyth's hunch about Clifford Olson. Corporal Fred Miley, head of the serious crime crimes unit, had finally seen that maybe the homosexual pervert angle was narrowing his scope a bit too much. This is a bit more serious than just homosexual perverts. We'll get back to that next fall. Yeah, we all like it. We all like those crimes. So he threw his support behind Corporal Forsyth's theory and appointed two officers to look into Clifford Olson. Most cops, however, considered Clifford Olson to be an impossible suspect. From their perspective, Clifford Olsen was just a middle-aged guy with a new kid and a new wife. And middle-aged newlyweds, they don't just start kidnapping and killing kids out of nowhere. So what if he's raped a bunch? Yeah, but that's different, okay? We all love to. We all wish we could. All right, Clifford Olsen just has the balls to do it, okay? That's the thing. The cops only believe this because they didn't look at the full picture. There was plenty of evidence that Clifford had been working up to this for years. I mean, for fuck's sake, he'd raped a guy just before his parole hearing in prison. But the higher-ups refused to put any surveillance on Clifford Olsen. We don't want to ruin his day. We don't want to muck up his schedule. It's more like, I don't feel like doing that. Like, I don't want to. I don't want to. It's not worth it. It's not worth it. To them, Clifford Olsen was a low-profile, if erratic, nuisance, which tells you how effective Clifford's narcissistic facade was. Really was. Clifford's webs of manipulation worked on people who had never even met him. Because if you'll remember, nuisance was the same word used by prison officials to describe Olsen 20 years earlier. He gives me so many shades of John Wayne Gacy. Yeah. Because John Wayne Gacy was also, you remember, like, you know, when they put the tail on him, he was ingratiating himself to the officers and he would go out of his way to talk to the police. And they all were just like, this fat fuck didn't do anything. Yeah. Like, it's like, at first thought, it's like, this fucking fuck this guy. Yeah, he's probably lighting the loafers, but he probably didn't do anything. Like, that's kind of the gaze of it because no one believes some chubby, sweet man would ever do a series of undiscoverable crimes. You know, I just figured out what he looks like. Do you remember those, like, children's books with the little critter? Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. Little critter. Yeah. Oh, my God. He does look like little critter. That's what I'm saying. He's not Pedro Pascal. Oh, he looks just like little critter. Holy shit. Shit, now I can't unsee it. That's cute. Now he's cute. Well, I mean, again, it brings me back to O.J. Simpson. You know, like, the narcissistic charm that these guys had, because there were so many people that would say, like, Rob Kardashian, for example. Like, Rob Kardashian was with O.J. Simpson all the way through the trial until the DNA. And when the DNA came and he was faced with, like, irrefutable evidence, like, oh, oh, no, I can't explain this away anymore. I can't, like, that's when he dropped him. And that's the same thing with Clifford Olson. It's like that narcissistic charm just pulls people in. And it works on people that he never even fucking met. It works all over, man. Now, because investigators dragged their feet, Clifford Olson's bloodlust was becoming uncontrollable. According to his wife, Joan, his personality changed completely in early July 1981. By that summer, Clifford had changed. Clifford had taken six victims and still had five more to go. According to Joan, when Clifford's rage turned on, the muscle tone in his face hardened. His gestures changed. The cadence of his speech altered. And even the structure of his sentences were different than normal. When Clifford got into this state, the violence was so bad that Joan said that she had to just disassociate to get through it. But as always, Olson would be back to his charming self the next day, insisting that the person Joan had been subjected to the night before, that's not really Clifford. That's someone else inside of Clifford who had taken control. Just understand, if anybody ever says something like that to you, that's who a person is. The guy on the inside. That's who a human is. It's that guy that's inside of the person you see. Yeah, the man inside me. Yes. Now, it's around this time that Olson picked up a partner in crime, a 19-year-old named Randy. Uh-oh. Bad name. Yeah, but a very Canadian one. Randy was sort of a drifter in training. So when Clifford suggested that they do a little theft, a little burglary, maybe we could haunt some young girls while we're at it. What? Oh, you what? Sounds like a job for Randy. Yep. Oh, Randy Canadian for Orny Randy. Yeah. Randy readily agreed. And so Clifford and Randy found a 14-year-old girl named Judy Cosma. But before getting to the business of murder, I suppose Clifford decided that Randy was not quite ready to go all the way. So Olson dropped Randy off at the mall after picking up Judy. And then Clifford took Judy to the same abandoned mine where he'd murdered Ada Court. Randy, of course, will come back into our story later on. Not the last we'll see of Randy. How long did I leave him at the mall? I asked about four days. I went there four days. You know, I love being at the Brookstone. I went down to the, um, I went to Macy's, JCPenney's. Great thing is, you know, you can sleep overnight in a Dillard's. They don't know. They don't know at all. I went inside the suit. I crawled up inside the suit. They don't look for you in there. Now, this had not been Judy Cosma's first run-in with Clifford Olson. Two weeks earlier, he'd given her the routine about paying her $10 an hour to wash windows. But Judy was busy that day. So she asked him if she could call him about it later. Instead of giving her his info, he asked for her phone number, telling her, no, no, no, I'll call your parents and I'll ask them if it's okay. Judy, however, did not have a phone. So Clifford asked for her name and told her that he would meet her in the same spot the next day. Now, in reality, Clifford just wanted to end this interaction. He had no intention of coming back. But Judy still wrote her name down in Clifford's notebook. Clifford forgot all about her writing her name down. But Judy writing her name in that notebook, that would be the first tangible link between Olson and a victim. But the cops would have to actually investigate Clifford before that link could be made. I don't want to look in there. It's his private book. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's private. Shit, it's locked. Who's got the tiny key? I don't know. There's nothing to do. Oh, God. God, God, why? God, why do you do this to the police? See, my biggest problem is that it says, do not read. On the cover. It says that, and it's in big letters, and those letters look serious. And that is opening this up. It might clarify itself as a serious crime. Now, when Clifford ran across Judy again a couple weeks later, Judy was excited that she hadn't missed the opportunity that Clifford had promised. But, quite unfortunately for Judy, Clifford Olson would reach greater heights of brutality with her than with any victim before. See, Clifford later claimed that he switched up his murder method, to throw cops off his trail. But it seems more likely that Clifford was just enjoying the exploration of what murder could offer him in the realm of gratification. It's almost like a 120 Days of Sodom type thing. Yes. Let's just see how far we can take it. After taking Judy out to the abandoned mine shaft and drugging her, Judy got sick from too many pills and too much beer. So, Clifford pulled her into the back seat. While she was barely conscious, Clifford positioned his buck knife at the temple of her mother. He cut her head with one hand, then grabbed the hammer with the other. But just as he was about to drive the knife into her skull, Judy managed to quietly say that she was scared. So, instead, Clifford beat her until she fell unconscious. He then raped her and dragged her out of the car. After throwing her down an embankment, hoping that the fall would kill her, he went down to find that she was still breathing. So, to finish the act, Clifford stabbed her in the throat and, in an attempt to make this murder look different from the others, or at least that's what he claimed, Olsen stabbed her 19 more times in a frenzied haze. He then tossed branches over the corpse and drove away, having now taken seven victims. Jesus fucking Christ, man. I was like, how do we know all this? Like, that's crazy to me. It's, well, the thing is about Clifford Olsen is that he talked, and a lot of times, you know, sometimes with serial killers, when they talk, it's the whole, the last living witness, that's what they call it, but the forensics match, you know, and, yeah, the forensics match and the amount of people who survived encounters with him is, it's incalculable, it's huge, so. It's like hundreds of people. Yeah, so they can match what he said with reports. Yeah, what sounds like, yeah, it sounds familiar, and also, as we'll get into, the idea of the bodies for cash thing. That was like where he, he quote-unquote added an incentive, and so he, he told them everything. He told them the whole story, and he did all, very dramatically. I'm just surprised no one ever, like, fucked him up. Well, I mean, he was kept in protective custody almost constantly. I'm just talking about, like, in here, he's going around town fucking kids. Oh, no, he did. He got beat up all the fucking time. Like, we talked about, I mentioned it last episode, it happened, like, in succession. Like, he, you know, he got beat up constantly, but he just took it. He was like, okay. He had no reaction to it. It was sort of the, he almost treated it as, like, the price to do it. You know, like, sometimes you get beat up. It's fine. Now, Olsen said that he recognized at this point that his urge to kill was absolutely uncontrollable. He was murdering teenagers and children at a pretty fast clip. So to calm himself down and let the heat die down a bit, he decided it was time to take a trip down to California. And he made this decision immediately after murdering Judy Cosma. After he drove away from Judy's corpse, Clifford stopped at a place called the Sasquatch Inn and called his wife. He told Joan, And guess what? We're going to Disneyland tomorrow in the morning. Get the baby ready. Get packed. Joan said that Olsen sounded jovial, very relaxed. So, I mean, it's not like she had a choice, but she said, sure, okay, let's do it. But for Joan, the far stranger occurrence that night was what Clifford did when he returned home. Joan said that once Clifford got back to their house, he took a bath with his hammer. It wants to relax. And I heard the hammer's back is tight. Joan said that Clifford sat in the bathtub and scrubbed his hammer with a brush. And it's a brush usually used to clean fingernails. When she asked why he was scrubbing his hammer, Clifford said that he'd borrowed the hammer from his dad and he wanted to give it back to him clean in the morning before they all went down south for their California vacation. Yeah, she showed up asking him why the door was open. And then it was like, why are you cleaning the hammer? Yeah, exactly. Why are you splishing and splashing everywhere? Why are you kicking all these suds everywhere? And then she looks, she's like, why are you bathing the hammer? And then he's just like, oh, you know, clean hammers. You know, he is way more of a hammer maniac. Yeah. And the other two. The idea of him going, little hammer, you're the one. Together we have so much fun. Hammer in the water, hammer out of the water. Oh, I made it. It's got a little sound. My son's beard. Come here, duck. See what your insides look like. As it turned out, leaving town was a smart decision on Clifford's part. Judy Cosmo was reported missing immediately. So Corporal Miley decided to follow Corporal Forsyth's hunch that Clifford Olsen was their man. Clifford, however, had already left for his Disneyland vacation before Miley could question him. Oh, he's on vacation. Can't bother him now. I don't want to interrupt him. Disneyland. This is such a magical place. Did you listen to his answering machine? He said, don't bother me. I'll be back in two weeks. But Miley did manage to talk to one of Jones' friends who knew Clifford quite well. This friend told Corporal Miley that Clifford was an exhausting person. He is just the living end. I am just Clifford. Yeah. But it's not exhausting in the way you or I would describe someone as exhausting. Yeah, he's just, yo, he's just a funny guy. Well, Jones Fred said, that Clifford was exhausting because he constantly tried having sex with her and he was, quote, constantly fondling babies. Yeah. Just always doing it. And his friend said that the fondling had included her own children. Always playing with their little penises and vaginas. And I'm just like, hey, stop doing that. Can we take a break? You're annoying me. You know how- Every time you touch another baby's penis, you're really, you're setting me off. You're not even washing your hands. It's just a constant shoo-fly. Shoo-fly. Shoo-fly. Get off of that. Get off of that baby's vagina. So, yeah, when the cops refuse to put away sex pests and you're left to deal with it all on your own, I guess exhausting is one way to put it. Yeah. Now, predictably, the trip down to Disneyland was not a pleasant one. Traffic. It's so hard. The prices, the snacks, waiting for Mickey. There's long stretches of I-10 that are real boring. Well, Olsen would later deny committing any crimes on the island. But it was quite obvious that his psychopathy was starting to leak into his family life more and more. And this was becoming more obvious as Clifford, Joan, and their infant son made their way down to the happiest place on Earth. Now, instead of staying at motels on the drive from Vancouver to Anaheim, Olsen would take his family deep into the woods to, I suppose, sleep on the ground. Maybe they pitched a tent every once in a while. Well, once they slept on the floor of a small church, who I suppose gave Clifford permission to stay there for the night. I'm sleeping here. I'm sleeping. We're on our way to Disneyland. Oh, yes. You will need sleep then, my son. But eventually, Clifford and Joan got into an argument over money, which is when the whole trip took a far darker turn. Every single Disney trip goes like this. By the way, just so you know, it's always like this. See, Olsen had borrowed $8,000 Canadian from Joan's father, and Joan had saved up half of the debt in anticipation of repaying it. Olsen, however, wanted her to withdraw the $4,000 she'd saved and give it to Clifford on this trip, saying they can pay her father back another time. Now, Joan refused to withdraw the money, but as it often goes with people like Clifford Olsen, he was no longer interested in using his narcissistic charm to get his way when it came to dealing with his wife. That takes patience, and Clifford was all out. But direct violence also didn't seem to do much when it came to manipulating Joan anymore. So during this argument about withdrawing the cash, Clifford turned his violent attentions towards their newborn son. In other words, Clifford had found that there was no line he would not cross to get what he wanted. One night after Olsen finally agreed to let them all stay in a motel, Joan left to buy some painkillers. She returned, however, to find their infant son screaming, while Clifford watched TV as if nothing was wrong. Joan walked over to their son. And found that the infant was covered in blood from a shallow knife wound under the left side of his chest. When Joan demanded to know what Olsen had done, he just stared at her and made his own demand. Withdraw the $4,000. Again, she said no, and it seemed like things might have calmed down, but Clifford wasn't done. After Joan thought it was all over, Clifford took the baby out to the motel pool and called for Joan to come outside. When she did, Olsen plunged. He plunged his own infant son into the pool and held him underwater. Joan screamed, which got the attention of a motel employee, so Olsen brought his son back out. But at that moment, as his infant son screamed and cried in his arms, Olsen stared at his wife and calmly said, "Wire for the money, Joan." This time, Joan did what she was told, and this was all before they even got to Anaheim. "They're going to hate the line to Space Mountain." "It's not quite as magical as it was when you were a kid, but it's still pretty cool." "I will say, she held her guns pretty strong." "Yeah, she did. She really did." Eventually, the Olsens did make it to Anaheim, but when you're driving south from L.A., Knott's Berry Farm comes before Disneyland, so they stopped there first and spent the day at Knott's. "The chicken." "The chicken's unbelievable." "They got the. I love. They got one of the fastest wooden coasters in the entire country." "Oh, yeah, and the mine is great." "It is." "No, I love a good wooden coaster. I still haven't been to Knott's Berry Farm." "It's great." "I mean, I grew up riding the Texas Giant, so I have pretty high standards when it comes to wooden coasters." "Oh, you don't like the Grave Digger." "Dude, you will love the Grave Digger, and it's the Olsens' favorite, so you'll love it. And the Stampeder." "Yep." Well, after the day at Knott's Berry Farm was done, Olsen uncharacteristically volunteered to go out and buy some formula for the baby. Jones said that Clifford came back three hours later exhausted, and the buck knife he always carried with him was missing. "Oh, yeah, he was trying to chase these pomegranates down the road, and they just kept falling in the ditch. It's just so hard to hold all these slippery little pomegranates." "You know, they grow wild here in Southern California." "Wild, right on the side of the road." "The trees are everywhere." "Oh." Now, since Olsen always disposed of his murder weapons, it can be assumed that Clifford might have killed someone that night in Southern California. To bolster that theory, Clifford woke up the next day and told Joan, "Well, we're going home." And Joan, of course, pointed out they hadn't been to Disneyland yet. "It's right there. They'd come all this way. It's right there." But Clifford said, quote, "Yeah, but we've been to Knott's Berry Farm, so it's the same thing." And so they went home. "It's not the same thing." "It's not. That is a bad dad statement." "That is incorrect. He's lying to the family." I'm gonna say it's one of the biggest crimes he's done, is the fact they went for. '80s Disneyland was special. Yeah. Yeah. I wish we all could've went. No, I went in '94. Yeah. Man, that was pretty good. That was a good time. It was. Almost makes you forget about killing a bunch of people. I would love an art exhibit that's just serial killers at Disneyland. Oh, just them, like Dennis Rader on the PeopleMover, just like seriously killing people. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a good one. It's a good one. It's a good one. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good one. That's a good one. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I needed to see the seals, smell the oil. I had to go to the nude beaches of Vancouver. Oh, I love it. Putting the coos in Vancouver. He said he could not delay the call of this yearning for even a single day. My Canadian blood yearns for the North. I yearn for the North. However, just like the trip to Hawaii, even though there is evidence that something happened, no murders around Knott's Berry Farm have ever been definitively linked to a murder. to Clifford Olson and his ill-fated trip to SoCal. But while Clifford's terrifying family road trip to California prevented the cops from speaking to him directly at that point, it did nothing to abate his ever-growing urge to commit murder most foul. Clifford still had four murders to go. And since the story of Clifford's capture and the bodies for cash scheme and all that shit, since they're all fascinating stories all on their own, I did not want to just push all of that shit into the very end of the episode. So we're making this shit a four-part. All right. I love this shit. You know, I love it. I miss true crime. I love true crime. Oh, yeah. So come back next week for the conclusion to our series on Clifford Olson, a.k.a. the Beast of British Columbia. Beast. Beast. You get one more of this. One more week of this voice. All right? I'm sorry, Canada. You have to understand. You have it better. Okay? So just take your toys and play with them. All right? I know you're like, oh, aggression coming from America. Guess what? It's not us. Yeah. And also, it's not aggression. It's words on a podcast. You want aggression, I'll fucking show you aggression. Yeah, buddy. Yeah, Marcus. I'll fucking show you aggression. I'm not a violent man. No, no. But they are. They like to fight. They do. Yeah, they do. For many times, the only times I went to Squirrely's in Toronto, they do like to fight. Having a go. Having a go. But, yeah, I actually do miss Canada. Canada's really nice. Shout out to Squirrely's, though. It was my favorite bar I went to all the time. It was my favorite dive bar in Toronto. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, shout out Squirrely's. Love Squirrely's. Mm-hmm. Tell me how it is. Go to Pitch. I don't like going anywhere. I know you don't. Go to Pitcher.com slash podcast and listen to us ad-free. You can also give us money to see last stream on The Left Live every Tuesday, 5 p.m. PST. And you can watch us if you want to watch the podcast. You can watch us on Netflix. On Netflix. And movie stories. You can see the video for that. Oh, yeah, on the Patreon. Exclusively on Patreon. And I guess over on the SiriusXM Plus thing, but I forgot what it's called. I think it's called SiriusXM Plus app. Great. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have fun over there. Hey, tonight, Henry and I are at the Warsaw eating pierogies on stage. I'm challenging you to a pierogi eating contest right now. Are we doing it? Yeah, fuck it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where are you getting the pierogi? Are you going Christina's or are you going Corksmouth? They have them right at the Warsaw. Oh, that's right. I forgot. The old lady's in the back with the sandwiches, the kielbasa sandwiches and the pierogies. I totally forgot that they sell the pierogies in the venue. It's unbelievable. Now, Marcus is going to be in the building. I don't know if he's going to come on stage. I'll be hanging out. I live in Greenpoint for five years. I miss Greenpoint. I miss New York. Can't wait to come back for New York Comic Con. That's right. We're going to be at Comic Con on Thursday and Saturday. Yes, yesterday. Today and tomorrow for the signing. Yep. And then on October 11th, Hartford, Connecticut. Henry and I are going to be at the Webster. Come check us out there. October 24th, Redway, California. Mateo Community Center for our annual Humboldt costume party. That's going to be fun. We're bringing Holden McNeely with us this time. I'm sorry. November 14th. They deserve this. November 14th, Portland, Maine at the Aura. That sold out. November 15th, Burlington, Vermont. Higher Ground Ballroom. December 11th, Iowa City, Iowa. December 12th, Columbia, Missouri at the Blue Note. We're having a lot of fun on the road. We're getting this fucking shit cooking, baby. And then don't forget next week on Wednesday out here in L.A., I got Slamber's Comedy Bash. I'm hosting a whole bunch of fun with Keith Carey and Leah Bonama. And then Amber's going to do a big closing set. So it's going to be a lot of fun. Great. So come hang out with us. If you want to see where I'm coming, go to eddytoons.com. You know that shit, though. Fuck yeah. Don't get it. And don't forget No Dogs in Space. Still going strong. Thank you so much, everybody. All the amazing comments that we've gotten on the first couple episodes of the New York Dolls series. So good. Yeah. We're taking this shit to the fucking maximum. Dude, I fucking love this. I'm so glad you guys are back. Thank you. Yeah, I love it. It's fucking awesome, dude. Thank you. The audience fucking likes it, too. Yeah. And we'll see you fuckers. Yeah, we'll see you guys soon. Hail Satan. And hail Gein. Hail. I'm going to say hail Lauren Halsey. I went to the greatest concert experience of my life last Tuesday. The Imagine That Show with Flea and Erykah Badu and The Alchemist. DJ Pee-Wee. It was fucking incredible. Go and just absorb that. There's got to be footage somewhere. But this new Alchemist, Erykah Badu album is fucking perfect. But regardless, so hail Lauren Halsey for putting that shit together. Oh, yeah. Great. Well, I'm going to say hail Cheap Trick as well. Yeah, he can't buckle up. While we're here. And his double guitars.