Speaker 1Shut up, and sit down. Welcome to Being On Stage, the only podcast that gives you motivation, inspiration, and confidence to be better on stage. No matter how you entertain, sing, dance, band, comedian, public speaking, MC, drag, burlesque, performance art, or street performer, this is the show for you.
Speaker 2Hey Rockstars, Reggie Dawson here, your host of the Being On Stage podcast. Thank you so much for tuning in. Welcome back. Hey listen, if you have not done so already, can I ask you to do me a favor? Go into iTunes and leave a rating and a comment on this podcast. It helps other people find the show, and while you're there, if you hit subscribe, you will get notified every time there's a new episode, so you can keep up with that. I'm going to dive right in here, guys, because I've had a lot of. And I've found recently that there's a lot of performers that do not want to accept or ask for any sort of help or advice or anything. They just want to figure it out on their own. And listen, hey, I respect that. I did that myself. I didn't really have a whole lot of guidance. I asked a few questions here and there, but for the most part, I had to put things together on my own. What went where, how to find bookings, how to find. How to find people to perform with, how to work with other people, and how to perform, how to act on stage, how to carry yourself, and that confidence in the presentation. And, you know, so as someone who has put it together themselves, let me tell you, it is so much harder to put it all together for yourself. Because I'll tell you, listen, there are people that started performing at the same time that I did, and they got so much further, so much faster, because they had someone mentoring them and helping them. They went out and they sought out people to help them and mentor them, and I did not. And I was, you know, I was determined, though. I was, the mindset that I had at the point was, I'm going to do this, and I'm going to do it my way, and I'm going to make it happen for myself. And eventually, I did get my eventual goal, but I didn't have a next step. I didn't have a next goal. And so trying to put this together yourself and not seeking that help and not seeking that advice. It can sometimes hold you back, and it's definitely going to take a lot longer. Think about learning what it is you do. You know, if you had to watch videos and trial and error and teach yourself, it's going to take time. It's got to be a lot slower than if you had someone training you. And so the same thing is with the performance itself. Like, you know, when you're learning to sing, you're learning to dance, you're learning to be an acrobat, gymnastics, aerial artist, whatever it is you do. When you learn how to do that, that's one thing. But then to turn it into a performance, to turn your talent, you know, your juggling, your miming, your contortion, whatever it is, to turn that into a performance is a whole other thing. And a lot of times, getting little pieces of advice and little help, you know, little bits of help from other people, no matter who they are, it doesn't matter if they're in your same genre of performing or not. You know, performing is performing, and that attitude and that charisma and that character that you portray. on stage, you know, that takes work and that takes time to develop as well. And I think that there's just so many performers that are bound and determined to do it all themselves. You know, they want to learn the talent themselves. They want to learn the skills, the techniques. They want to teach themselves. And again, mad respect, but it's so much harder that way. Little pieces of advice here and there goes a long way. You don't have to always pay somebody just to give you. a nugget of wisdom that's going to take you so much further than where you are today. Seek out that help. Seek out advice. Listen, some advice is going to come to you unsolicited. And you know what? Just take it. Like, don't fight it. Just take the advice that's given to you. It's done with good intentions. Just take it. You can decide if you want to follow it and use it later. But at the time when it's being given, just accept the advice graciously and move on. But you know what? Don't be afraid to reach out for advice and for help. It's okay to reach out for help. It does not make you a weak person. It does not make you a weak performer. If the person refuses to help you, that's on them. Because I'm going to tell you again later, there's only two reasons that people don't help other people. They're either insecure with themselves or you did something to them already. And if that's the case, shame on you. But if someone refuses to give you advice or refuses to help you, that's on them. They're threatened. They're insecure. And truthfully, they shouldn't be the person you're seeking advice from after all. When you make that approach, though, like just a piece of my advice to you, when you make that approach to somebody and you ask them for their help, whether it's to, you know, hey, listen, I'm trying to get this new sequence down or I'm trying to get this new flow down or I'm trying to get this new rhythm down or I can't quite do this. I can't quite do this transition from this chord to this chord or from this move to this move. No matter what it is you're asking, compliment them first. Like when you're asking them, give a compliment, like a validation of listen, I look up to how you do that, how you perform. I was just wondering if maybe you had a piece of advice on boom. There it is. Compliment. Give a give a compliment. It's not an ego thing. It's a respect thing. It's a validation thing. Like because, you know, think about yourself. As a performer, everyone's got insecurities, so they need to be a little validated in order to help you. So give that compliment, you know, give them that that win and then seek their advice. Let me let me flip this on you. OK, like let's let's say you're the one being asked for the advice. Like someone's coming to you saying, hey, I really like how you do this. Can you give me some advice on boom? All right. So on the flip side, when you're asked for advice, what would prevent? You from helping somebody like there's there's really only two things I can think of. And one is they've already done you wrong. They've already done something to upset you or lose your trust or your respect. And if that's the case, then I get it. But the only other reason not to help somebody like if they're coming to you for the first time, the only reason not to help somebody is your own insecurity. Like if you're threatened by them, that's on you. You know, you you got to fix that. That's your own. Your own growth, your own improvement. That's on you. And but you know what? It's OK to feel threatened. Like it's OK to be in that position where, listen, maybe you've just been skating by for the past two or three years because no one's just been able to to be at your level. But listen, all of a sudden someone is. Then what? Then you're going to feel threatened when they come to you for advice because you're established. It's happened to me like I've had that performer come to me and just ask for little nuggets. Exactly what I'm telling you to do is just ask for little nuggets. Don't ask for the whole book. Ask for like page one. And, you know, I've had that happen where they've come to me and I felt threatened because I would just skated by for a couple of years. And all of a sudden someone was working harder than I was working faster than I was and just had more natural ability that or it seemed to have more natural ability than I had. It was crazy. It was it was an insane feeling to all of a sudden be like. Where the hell did this come from? What the hell just happened? And when that person approaches you for advice, you're like, I don't want to help you. I don't want you to be keep keep getting even better. But you know what? I've learned that that's the exact opposite of how you should feel. If you feel that way, if you feel threatened, that's a reflection on your work, the work that you've put into your talent. Because I'll tell you, when that happened to me, I was not working hard. I was, you know, skating by doing a show. Show once or twice a month and, you know, not putting really a lot of work into reusing outfits over and over and over and over again. I wasn't putting any money into it. I wasn't putting any hard work into it. I was skating by. I was still rehearsing. I still knew knew my stuff, but I was just skating by. I wasn't improving. I wasn't growing. And lo and behold, someone shot above me, shot above my success so, so, so quickly. It was insane. And when he came to me for advice. You know. At first, I was very resistant. Eventually, I told him, I said, you know what, just keep doing what you're doing. My my only advice to you, truthfully, is to to be confident in what you're doing because you you have it. You don't need to rely on other people to to help you shine. You can shine on your own. At the time, he was doing group numbers and everything because it was a confidence issue. And that was really all I could give him was that confidence boost. And that's all it took. And in that moment, though, in that. Same moment, when someone that I gave that little bit of confidence to that little bit of that little bit of just motivation and inspiration and everything. And that moment is when I was reminded how much I enjoyed helping other performers, how much I enjoyed, you know, coaching people and giving them that confidence and and guiding them on their path to greatness. And that's that's one of the things that led me to where I am today. But the point is, here is if you refuse to give that advice, you'd never. gonna feel that joy of someone else succeeding because it what you did for them. And I know that there is a joy in being the best. There is an extreme honor and just an amazing feeling of being the best. But there's an equal amazing feeling when you help somebody become better than you. Just to see their abilities turn and change based on what you said, that's an incredible feeling too. So here's the kicker, man. When they come to you, when they're the ones coming to you for the advice, they're a fan of yours. They're looking up to you. And to have them approach you like that, that should be an honor. That is a privilege to be that to somebody. And so when that happens and you're asked for advice, even if you feel threatened, even if you're unsure, even if you're, even if you're unsure of their intentions, you know, give them something, give them one piece of something that can help them grow. You know what it's like to be the best. You know what it's like to be the. I look forward to seeing you there. There's a couple of questions just to help me get to know you a little bit better, but they're not mandatory. So come on in. We look forward to seeing you there and keep on shining.
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