EPISODE 457: A Dik-Dik's Worth Of Raw Chicken

[Music] Hello, welcome to Bundavista episode 457. We've got a great episode coming up, I'm sure, but first let's get some housekeeping out of the way. We've actually got here, we've got some updates to consensus reality. Now if this is your first meeting I want to be clear these are not new trends, but something deeper, an unspoken shift in our collective understanding. Now let's see what we've got here. I know for a while now a normal birth year to have has been 1986 and has been for like quite a few years now, but we're seeing, finally seeing that get an update to 1992, but if don't get too comfortable though, because word is we might see that get bumped up to 1994 before the end of the year. Along the same lines, let's see 40 is now the new 36. Yes, we got the incredible Hulk is and has always been extremely wet. That one makes sense. A Venge 7 Fold is now recognized as being technically adept and knowingly kitsch, much like we saw the critical assessment of the darkness change. I'm not crazy about that one, but it makes sense and it is what it is. I don't make the rules. I'm speaking, I'm not making the rules using a laptop on the toilets basically fine, five inches also basically fine. The new popular disease to have is now mass cell activation syndrome don't get mad, don't get mad. It's actually personal experience, addict don't get mad, don't get mad at me. I'm not being mean, but yeah, it's mass cell activation syndrome. I'm here with Lucy. Lucy, how you feeling about Venge 7 Fold these days? How am I feeling about a Venge 7 Fold? A bit kitsch, I know, but sort of like walking into this because I feel like I'm walking into a joke where the joke would be that I have a Venge 7 Fold. You need to understand that they're not very good. They're not a good band. I kind of like a Venge 7 Fold. We can't consent the reality is updated if we. Oh, fresh axiom? Yeah, fresh axiom. It's a fresh axiom from like 10 years ago. Yeah, good at the guitar and stuff. We'll create a nickel back now or whatever. No, what the fuck? No, not like that. No, not like that. Any others you want to add, Lucy on your list? No, I'm good. I think you've got it covered. I think you've got it handled. Especially stuff about the five inches, yeah. Yep. Also here with Ben, now Ben you're saying that air friars once the most descendant kitchen item since the NutriBullet are now on the outer due to concerns about P-Fast. Yep, I am sorry. I was never on board with them. I want the record to say that. Never on board with them at any point. Never on board one. Okay, let's just put a pin in that because we may come back to that because I do have a note for next week that apparently P-Fast might not actually be that bad for you. Well, that'd be good. Yeah, that'd be good to find out, I think. And finally, here's Andrew with the latest ranking of races by how cool they are, Andrew. Okay, ready? This is. One more thing. Going to Shock You. Number one with a bullet for 2026. Macedonian. That's all out of the way. It's hard to start the episode. Well, well. Very. So I was just expecting a couple of us. All about like the whole. Looking at car prices? Yeah, I don't know. I'm pathetic. Which car are you planning on getting rid of? I don't know yet. The Benz? The Benz. You love the Benz. You really enjoying the Benz at all, I meant. I think the Porsche is a little chocky. Like it was cool when you first got it. He's a Benz still cool. I feel like that's not a cool car anymore. It's not cool, but it's luxurious. I know, they were fucked up. They're going like cryptocurrency and shit. They're charging you. They charge you a yearly subscription for like seat warmers. This is BMW. That's BMW, which leads directly. BMW, not Benz. Sorry, my apologies. BMW. My dump it. It's time for dump it. Fuck yeah. Ain't enough money stuff. Drunk it if you want the show to be good then. Go on and dump. Oh, let's dump. Oh, you know what you've got? Drunk it. Fresh it. It's a little garbage. This is going to be what I think it is, Ben. I think it is exactly what you think it is, Andrew. So we talked about the BMW seat warmers thing ages ago. The thing was, they shipped all these cars with seat warmers. The seat warmers were inside the seats. They were in the car. You can only get them if you paid a subscription fee. With your money. Pretty fucked up. The thing from this week is that anyone with a BMW older than. No, newer than 2021. 2021 onwards. Opened up their car the other day. Turned it on and now you kind of have to picture this in your mind's eye because it is a little strange. But modern cars have a sort of iPad style big screen on them now that shows our temperatures. It's got in 14. What's the news? It's got in 15. It's a subway surfer. Yeah, it's for you subway surfer while you're on the highway. Shit like that. And a bunch of BMW owners owned their car, bought their car. We're paying off their car, turn it on and then there's a banner ad on the big sort of iPad thing that's in there on the dash. For Spider-Man brand new day. If you clicked on it, it would play a trailer for Spider-Man brand new day. I independently arrived at your first story at the moment that you were about to do your first story, Ben. I bumped it up the list because it was so convenient, but pretty fucking. Yeah. Wow. Also, yeah, no, this is like honestly so insulting. This is like fucking them coming to your house and driving a stake into your asshole. It is very much like someone sort of. Exactly like that. Like waking up in the middle of the night, putting a black bag over your hair, dragging you out in front of your screaming family. Just fucking cheap. We're just sheep. Obey. Obey, that's what it should say, you know? You. I'd like. We've already ranted enough about the fact that your TV that you bought will advertise shit to you, which is insane. The fact that your car is just another like billboard. You paid for it. You didn't so much money for it. And I don't think you should stop feeling insane about this. I think the moment we stop feeling insane about this is the moment we get to watch fucking Spider-Man ads on our. You know, the car when you turn it off, right? It should top up while you're on the highway. It's. Fuck, I. Fuck you! This. You know how. You know, like. Shucks. New. new cars will have that sort of screen that's in the dash and it projects a reflection onto the windscreen so that you can see like the speed or whatever. They should just have like a full-size TV there that just plays full screen Spider-Man trailer for you while you're on the highway. It's kind of obscuring like 50% of the visible area applied. It's like jumping on cars. It's immersive, you know? Yeah, yeah. These waves are insane. The best thing is that they know they can say to the Sony Corporation, we know that people's eyes are staying on this commercial. They're not looking away, they're not switching over to their phone because they don't want to die. Yeah. Honestly, don't throw a good idea away like just because it's been infected by ads though, right? Like imagine it's projecting up, you're out there, you're looking at the. You're looking at the windscreen anyway, right? You're keeping an eye on your speed, you're keeping an eye on the other cars, but you're also keeping an eye on the raid because it's being projected like. That guy's getting kicked down the stairwell. And you can adjust the opacity. Oh, yeah. Just to adjust the opacity. Yeah, the cruise control. The adaptive cruise control is holding your position perfectly. But you still got eyes on the road to take control anytime that it's needed. 80% opacity. But also, man, oh man, that fucking guy just got his throat impelled on the door frame and that's some nasty shit, dude. Yeah, always back. Oh, we got his spine on that railing, that didn't look good. Yeah. Ah, school bus. This is the statement that BMW put out, which I thought, you know, might explain it, might make people listen and pray about it. Yeah, more reasonable, yeah. To celebrate the partnership with Spider-Man trademark brand new day. Bad start. World class bad start. BMW is a special surprise for its drivers. The Spider-Man animation will be available to all customers with suitably equipped vehicles from the 27th July to the 10th of August, starting the car brings up a special banner in the control display. Clicking on it then activates the Spider-Man trademark animation, comprising a full-screen festive animation in the control display with aptly chosen backing music and a and a company in light show of the ambient lighting system. Have you seen the animation in question, Ben? No, I have not. It is not good. It's going to sound like a lot of the presentation of this is something you get. Like it looks like something you can have. Congratulations for it's driving the BMW. The backing music is aptly chosen in exchange for it exchanged the hand only $85,000 for a car you have received one animation. Fuck it, it's got to be like so far everyone involved in doing this. It's so far from being human that like at some point someone's just going to like explode like spontaneous either just the collective weight of their sins on their psyche and they're just going to fuck a detonate like no one that does any of this cares like no one like basically no one that I think there's gotta be there's gotta be some semblance of your humanity deep down that's like screaming even though you've been put into this mind and body that's like a servitor for making the worst content on earth and putting in front of people that don't want to see it. I think they do want to see it. I think it's a good idea is here. Listen to the listen to the party or brain that's screaming listen to the party or brain that makes you want to just fucking freak out. Now make it worse what we got to do is make the the iPad like cozy gaming and you've got like there's a little guy and you need to feed him by driving kilometers. That's the reason he needs to consume petrol and you've got to drive to make him strong and he's like a cute guy. Oh I'm hungry for emissions. Yeah. Waking emissions. Oh. Oh. You're guys. You did it. You didn't drive yesterday you missed some of your daisies. Yeah. Deadly. Close it closing the circle by driving another hundred kilometers. I was going to close your ring. Instead of drums out of coconuts but oh well. I think I'm project. Hell. Project do like an an AR game projection full projection over the windscreen. It is what's happening on the highway in front of you but to you looks like subway suffer. Swirling in out of the lanes. It'll make you a better driver. Yep. What are you more interested in? Driveway. Driveway or subway serving? Driveway. Hey those big screens they've got in cars these days they could put anything on those including a naked guy. We talk about naked guys in naked guy. It's coming straight from you. Where did his boats go? Naked guy. Running right at you. This comes from KRIV the Griv. Naked man arrested after plasma patient sees eyes peeking through business wall. Okay. Now we're talking we're talking blood plasma. This is another plasma gun situation. So a video popped up on one of my fees yesterday of a guy with a YouTube channel who apparently just like chain smokes blunts and makes and fires plasma guns and he's garage. So I don't know what the weapon tech situation that we're at is but based on that story we did the other day and what I'm seeing we just have. I think we missed a few updates. Yeah. We missed a possibility update. Yeah. Energy weapons. I don't know a job is available until it's taken. Oh my god. And you can't be that guy with the monetized YouTube channel where you chain smoke blunts and make and fire plasma guns. He took that. You got to think of your own thing. You got to have another thing. Thinking of your own thing is hard because it can't be one of the things you already know. It's hard to do one of the other things. Most of the things that I can think of are the stuff that I know is. Yeah. And I know those stuff from other people doing it. It's hard to think of stuff that you don't from already know. Yeah. Yeah. All right. No one has to settle. I think. No one had the idea to do a bad podcast before. Yeah. We were the first one. We did start a wave of the fact that we were just genuinely that maybe our niche that we created. A podcast that maybe sometimes isn't good. Yeah. You're welcome. I mean, it was arrested after being found in the wall of a plasma center in Fresno. In the wall. In the walls. Oh, you thought. I thought it. You thought it. I thought it sort of flew through the wall painting kind of situation. And at all like peeping from outside. Like a back in the wall. Like he was outside and looking through the cracks. Like a crack in the wall. He's like a crawl space motherfucker. He's the crawl space. I thought something like normal. Like he was in a secret room inside the plasma center. And there was a painting on the other side of the room. He could slide across. and then his eyes would be where the painting's eyes were. Something, like, I'd follow you around the room because they're humorous. Yeah. Yeah. Which is also true of that painting with the. - The Mildness. - Lisa? But what's the one, the, is the girl with the purlearing? Is that the one where they're supposed to the eyes? Just always follow you wherever you are? - She's looking at me. - I think she's into me. - Yeah. The scene was a grief, griffles biomatt, USA plasma center. Oh, you're going down to give some plasma griffles? Hey, see you down at griffles later? Fucking hell. Griffles biomatt. - Biodomatt. - Griffles biomatt, USA. - That's so. - Sorry. - Every like. - Like I'm going down to give plasma and they're gonna give me a placemat with cartoon illustration. The Fresno Police Department says officers first got a call around 7am for reports of a possible person in the attic of the business. - A possible person. - A possible person. - So it could be a possible. - In the attic. - Person in the attic. - Yeah. - I like it. - It's a possible person. - You've got to. - Could be a creature. - Yes. You got a Schrodinger's attic guy? You got to collapse that waveform. - Maybe I think we haven't observed him yet. - Yeah. I like that he's nude. He's kind of. kind of wearing the building when you think about it. Oh, yeah. Back in the day. Back in the day. - Clothes. - You'd be nude and you'd have to wear a barrel. - Because that's all people do. - Oh, a potato sack. - Yes. - Yeah. - Barrels are so expensive, by the way. Like a barrel is still intact. - Well, now they are. Because people bought them all to make bourbon or whatever. - What were the barrels. - What were the barrels for before? Like regular shit. Like water. Officers searched, but did not find anything. Later around 9am officers were called back to the same location. After a patient in Plasma Center heard noises coming from within the wall and somehow saw eyes peering out at them. Like somehow was there a fucking hole or not? - Cracks. - Cracks? - Perhaps. - A psychostyle. - Something to peep through. - Yeah. Hey, look, I got an idea. We know you got all that fucking kit from Fallujah, right? We know you've got an M-rap. Drops of smoke in the walls. See what crawls out. Oh, teabird. So close. I'm kind of like a multidisciplinary thinker. - Yeah. - Yeah. Imagine stuff you don't know, which is a damn shame. I think it's not fair to come in and poke around it like 7am. It's not fair to expect him to be up and clothed and on his evading scrutiny game at like 7am. After 9.30, if you're getting caught, that's on you. After 9.30 business hours, you should have adjusted to the rhythms of when people are coming into the Plasma Center and know to just kind of mine your own business. Stay up in the crawl space with Nintendo Switch. Either turn it all the way down or you got your headphones in. Don't get too excited when you do get to throw Mario's hat onto something and it turns into that thing. You turn into that thing with Mario's hat. Don't get too excited. They'll hear you wriggling around. Kick in your feet. - Bouncing up and down. - Yes. - Going yippy. I'm having fun gaming. I came into the office and I just heard it is a me from a. - Yeah. - Not for the attic. Officers tried to get the man to come out, but he started throwing metal objects at them. What metal objects? - Coins and stuff. - Things that he had. - Yeah. - Trinkets. - Hey, come out of there. I don't wanna. - Yeah. No. They then used peppermoles on the man and when he came out, officers discovered he was completely nude. - So they. - They only peppermoles, you know what I'm saying? - Fair true. He was arrested and taken to the hospital. The man also damaged a water man at one point, flooding the lobby of the business. The rest of the strip mall was also evacuated due to the water possibly causing flooding in the other buildings as well. - I'm sorry, the Gryffles Biomatt Plasma Center is in a strip mall. Oh my God, you should see a photo of this. It's like, you know how there's the meme where it's a photo of like it's a telephoto photo of sort of like a truck stop, but one of those like off the highway grouping of like a road. - Yeah, like a road strip and whatever. - There's just like 5,000 different signs and stuff poking up in the air like average American street. - Anywhere in America. Like I've seen five millions of those. - Yeah, it's all the same. - Five. Yeah, and like this is this strip mall that it's in. American strip malls, I think maybe especially in the Southwest, but throughout a lot of the country I often made it this kind of beige faux stone. - Yeah. - Sort of cream. - It's like a clean stone collared by, yeah. - Yeah, and this is just one of those. You know, giant car park, a bunch of other businesses or whatever, but it's just, you know, - Plasma Center. - Plasma. - Sell my plasma and grab some Chipotle after or whatever. - Yeah, going up to the plasma center, you know, you know anything? - Let's see who is real stone. -Fode the first stone. -What? -What? -No, I got it. What do you mean? -What? -Hey, that's style of building. It's not particularly regional. We talk about things that are in regional bullshit. ♪ Regional bullshit ♪ ♪ Every little town has got their own bullshit ♪ ♪ Regional bullshit ♪ ♪ Every little town has just got to have it ♪ ♪ ♪ This is from WHO and Iowa. More seating at Iowa State Fair. Thanks to Jeffries. Now, how do we pronounce that word again? Loose is the style of chair. -Adderondack? -Adderondack? -Yeah. -Adderondack. -Thanks to Jeffries. -Adderondack. -Oh, I know that from Hellforn. From Hellwops. -Adderondack. Adderondack thrown. Got meat on my bone, AT&T on my phone, Leetable and my packets alone. Yeah, et cetera. -Cool. -That's good. -Yeah. -Now, do feel good in. There will be more places to sit at the Iowa State Fair this year. Thanks to Jeffrey Grimes. -Okay. -And Kenny Resident wants to be known as the State Fair Chair Guy. He learned how to build Adderondack chairs six years ago during COVID. -That's odd. -You spent COVID learning to build an Adderondack chair? -Isn't that a wallet sick? -I would love to build one. -It can't be that hard. You can mostly know part of it is wider than like. -I can't spend one. -What do you mean with a wig? -What part of it? -You're with a wig. -I don't know. -You got to smooth them. -You got to smooth the edges. -I've never made a chair. -What does it look like? -Have any of you made a chair? -No. -I've made a stool. -Stop asking. There's my couple of stool staswotic. -Yeah. -There's a whole subplot in the Mel Gibson movie "The Patriot" where he's trying to make a chair but he's bad at making chairs. -Oh. -Later on in the movie, sits in a nice chair and he goes, "Oh, how'd they do it?" -Let's just have something to watch out for. -That's good. -What are the easter eggs? -In the Roland Emmerick movie "The Patriot." -That's crazy. -They're kind of the ubiquitous outdoor chair. They're not the cheap plastic shit that we churn out now. But yeah, you know, they're really low to the ground. They sort of. You could probably Google it to see the image of us. -Looks like a fence. -I don't know how to spell this. -It looks like fence. -At a round duck. -What if fence were chair? -I can't make it. -It's like if a fence was a chair. -I've never seen one of these in my life. -You can really easily picture JFK sitting in one of these. He's little slutty shorts, beautiful tan, beautiful head of hair, long future head of it. -Definitely see out the shorts. -Hong future. -Log log future of curving the US's military spending, ramping down the aggression with Russia and Cuba. -Yeah. -He's just having a beer sitting in the chair. -He's having a beer. He's kind of a Miller-Lyre. -We got close correct to the USA. We're going to ride in the CIA. -It's all up from here. -You know what? Let's close the Pentagon. I think everything's going to be just fine. -What I love about this is we live in such a mass-produced, drop-shipping bullshit world now that if someone says that they sell something, it doesn't mean they have any connection to it. If he's like, "I want to be the chair guy." I'm like, "Oh great, you own Jeffrey Grimes' chair warehouse." -You can put chairs. -Yeah, you drop-shipped chairs in a broken water store. But no, this is going during COVID. Unlike every other US citizen stayed indoors. That was like my favorite house. -Witlin' away at those chairs. -Yeah. -Sit down his front porch with a single stick at a whittlin' door. -One plank at a time. -Witlin' away. -Shilling a piece of straw. -Shilling a piece of that wrong Jack chair. -But what's he sitting on? -Well, that's the bootstrapping problem. -Yeah. -I was talking to a friend of mine about this the other day. She's really wants to build a really nice workbench for herself, which is a process that I went through years ago where I was just doing a lot of research on types and forms of workbench. We had a great book called The Anacus Workbench. It was just a really good getting into the thought process of it. She's like, "But I'm stuck because I'm at the point where I need to build it." "I have nothing to build it on." -Oh, no. -It's good. -It's the workbench problem. It turns out the solution is you can buy a workbench or Facebook marketplace for 50 bucks and you go, "You know what, I'm going to use this to build my workbench." And you go, "Wait a second. Hold on. I have a workbench." -I've already got a workbench. -I've already got a workbench. -The good news is that tons of old guys are dying and they're beautiful 100-year-olds, 250 kilo hardwood workbenchers. -They've been fucking sitting on those things, not literally, but like. -Yeah, come get up on them. -Gooam. -It's just. Oh man. Some of the benches they got out there. -Vice is on them. -Bullets mine. -Yeah. -And now, their kids are trying to get rid of them because they are heavy and cumbersome and they have no use for them. -Yeah. It turns out what's light and cheap is like a particle board piece of shit. -Yeah. -It's not going to hold your vice steady. That vice is shaken all the way. -Yeah. -Yeah. -It's shit sucks. -Yeah. -But this guy's making his own fucking chairs. -Oh, yeah. -It's not particle board bullshit. He's probably making it out of beautiful American yellow pine. Maybe even a hard piece of shit for patients. -Oh, I was just joking fair. He's making him for the fair. That's beautiful. -Which I mean, he's probably got a bottlenecking problem here somewhere that like the fair is probably going to be quite big. He's like one guy. -One guy. -He can't make that much noise. -How many chairs could he have? -I love the concept of like CEOs. -Atta Rondax, he sells his chairs online and often donates them to local causes. -Oh, that rules. -This man. -This is a good man. -This is a good man. -This is a good man. -This is a good man. -Jeffrey Grimes. -You're a good man. -Mr. Grimes. -His first customer at the fair Grimes was bubbly. -Where you'll find dozens of his chairs at the bar located at the top of the hill near Grandfather's Barn. -You know, excited to get the chairs. -But what was their business called? - [laughs] -Grimes at the best part for him is seeing people enjoy his hard work. -I love it because I honestly genuinely love the Iowa State Fair Grimes at. -I love just coming and seeing that people are sitting down and enjoying something that in my garage, I build one by one. -And that people are just sitting down and enjoying their favorite whatever food on a stick. -That's beautiful. -That's beautiful. -That's beautiful. -That's beautiful. -Also, if that were me, I'd get really frustrated. If that were my chance, I'd be like, you're sitting on it wrong. -You're kind of sitting on it wrong? -You're actually, you're scooching your ass too far forward so you're actually putting all the pressure on your lower back. -You're sitting too heavy on the chair. It's going to damage the timber that I've literally rolled. -You have to plunk down. You could lower yourself down. -Yeah, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. -I built that in my garage. [laughs] -Handing the menu back to the waitress and saying, "Hey, you choose as long as you stick it." It's probably not a stick. Probably one thing I will say about the Adderon Deck Chair. Hard to get it in and out of. -Yeah. -True love. -It's very low on ground. -It's angle and it's kind of lower at the back. It's no good. -Yeah, I mean, they're great for sun lounging. This is a sun lounger for sure. You've got to be here, you're next to the lake or whatever the fuck. -It's a chair. -You don't have a cushion when you don't need to get back up. -You do not want to be on a constant. If you were playing a round of darts with friends, you wouldn't be getting in and out of the chair. -No, you don't need to be on that chair. -Everyone would be gone, like, can you stop sitting in that fucking chair? It takes you so long to have your turn. -The noise gets worse every time you stand up. -Woo! -Just this type of chair looks so fucking uncomfortable to me. -But they're timeless. -Beautiful. -Rock hard. -Ramrod straight backs on him. -Where's the ergonomics? -Where's the cushions? -This is pre-economics, I think. -I don't like that. -I like post-economics. -This summer, eight more than a year. of Jeffries at a Rondack Chairs will be in front of Josephine's Glazed doughnuts, which is located near the swine barn. That's beautiful. I'm not down there in the swine barn. Yeah, down there in the swine. There are dozens of his chairs at Bubley, which is near Grandfather's barn. There's eight of them at Josephine's Glazed doughnuts near the swine barn, very spun-based navigation system that they use at Iowa State Fair. He hopes to have more of his chairs at the fairgrounds in the future. Me too. Yeah. Hey, keep on chairs. Let's go. Let's work it out. Keep on chair. I hope to see one of your chairs one day. Yeah. I'd love to park my keyster in one of those sometime, pal. That's a fine chair there, but thank you very much. I'd lower myself slowly. Oh, respectfully. Respectfully. Yeah. Yeah, hands on the armrest. I'm not fucking free-handing that shit. Oh, you don't want to free-hand it. Hey, this seems like a nice guy who is maybe using a lot of palries. Power tools in his garage. Maybe that's caused some neighborly disputes. We talk about neighborly disputes in neighborly disputes watch. This was sent in by Listen and Mass. This comes from the Baltimore banner. Vultures flock to a Columbia neighborhood where women won't stop feeding them raw meat. Oh. I think that's why the vultures are going there. Yeah. They tend to like that stuff. This is not our first neighbor won't stop feeding vultures or buzzards. Basically, carry in birds, meat, and the neighbors want them to stop, but they won't. Yeah. It feels pretty good to feed a carry in bird, though. Fuck, fucking oath. Something those neighbors should consider, you can't always get what you want. You get what you get and you don't get upset. Sometimes you get-- It's the process of paying for a community. Yes. Yes. You do, there is going to be conflict. We will be at odds with each other sometimes living in close proximity. That's what we get from being in a society. You get all of the benefits that come from that. And also, your town is overrun by carry in birds. You can't just switch the natural world off. I know it's easy to go like, oh, I'm so sick of these birds or whatever. So I'm going to cut these trees down. But you can't just give in to that. I think part of living in the natural world is sometimes your neighborhood is going to get overrun with like 4 to 600 vultures. And they're just shitting everywhere. They have to shit on their legs to keep them cool all the time. They've got to shit on them so they're like, kind of just shitting everywhere. Is that a thing that vultures famously do? I don't know, one of them. All the eagles, I think, shit on themselves. It's called a "faperative cooling" and it works very well. You see me pissing all over my own feet in the summertime? Yeah. It's a "faperative cooling". Leave me be. Yeah. If you see Andrew pissing on his own feet in summertime, no, you didn't. Yep. If you see me pissing on theos feet in the summertime, that's between us. I saw what I couldn't see it. Young suns neighbors in Columbia were fed up and grossed out. They were tired of the stench of decaying meat, the poop dripping down their rooftops, and regurgitated chicken bones in the earth. Yes, we're making some people happy. Yeah. Catch the stage. Sun, a resident of the Glenmont neighborhood near Longreach, is resisting efforts to make her stop feeding raw meat to black vultures in her backyard. Her actions drew hundreds of the prehistoric looking scavengers to the neighborhood, where they often lined rooftops and tree branches around her house. Sun who declined to comment Thursday after this story published told county health officials she believes the birds need her help. Quote, "My bird lover. I love to feed all the wild birds." Sun wrote in a March 20th letter to the Board of Health, "I believe the birds are guardian angels for us all." That's kind of beautiful. And also, if she was feeding pigeons, would you be this mad? Yeah. She's giving bread to the ducks at the park. You're going to get angry. I don't think so. Dick Dick's are not supposed to eat bread. But if it was one of the cute animals, through your like weird fucked up anthropomorphic lens, if they were like 60 dick dicks in the neighborhood that she was feeding, would you be like, "Oh, yucky, there's all these dick dicks everywhere." She'd be the later, the more dick dicks to the neighborhood. You'd be like, "Hey, thank you for bringing the dick dicks here." It's the dick dick lady. It's the dick dick lady from TikTok. Yeah. Yeah, we see the TikTok dick dick lady. It's crazy. What if that culture was a dick dick? What if it was a dick dick? You didn't think about that, did you? Not sure what they ate. Don't know. I think sandwiches, that's what I've been feeding them. Have Ruben? I'll be able to eat for my dick dick. Dicks will only eat him, Ruben. This is a brush dressing ball. I believe they can speak as well. But county officials disagree. Finding her feeding of the lap dog sized birds, a health hazard and a nuisance. Lap dog sized birds. Lap dogs. I don't think it's up to county officials to decide what's a nuisance. I could decide what the health hazard, I'll give them that. I also think, compare the size to, instead of a lap dog, compare it to a more accessible dick dick. Size of bird. Yeah. So tell me it's chicken size. Tell me it's turkey sized. I've also just pretty big right. I would argue bigger than a lap dog. About the size of a dick dick. Not that I'm taking science here, but yeah, probably about the size of a dick I'd say. Maybe a bit bigger than a dick dick, actually. Oh, you ever just look at the Google image results for dick dick? No, I think you. Oh, these things are good. Oh, they're the cutest little fucking branches. Yeah, they're not that big, but that's perfectly normal. Yeah. Something that's hardly five inches long. It's five inches around like the global average, you know? Yeah. So it's interesting because when you say, never mind. She was warned and stopped feeding the vultures years ago, but she resumed feeding them last year and her ongoing dispute with county officials has advanced to Howard County Circuit Court, where son is appealing at July 21st, ruling by a district court judge, the found her guilty of violating the county health code and find her $2,500. So she stopped, but she's back. She's like, Lord, help me. Yeah, she's gone back to the old her feeding raw meat to eaters of the dead. Not just meat either bones to. Yeah, well, I think the bones are in the big. Yeah. I consider bones as separate to meat. Bones is separate to meat. Yeah. Meat is not bones. Bones is not meat. Bones is not meat. And yet in some of the bones is not the carrion. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Is it all carrion? It's all carrion. Well, it all will be eventually all of us all of us. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to die. I just remembered. Oh, I'm becoming carrion. All of this will be lost. Don't create me. I would prefer you to just sort of lay me out on the side of a highway nude somewhere. Yeah. Speed up the carrion process. I want to get back to the earth. About six or seven years ago, son noticed a committee of them shivering in her backyard and made a winter cold snap. She wrote a media. A media of vultures. Is that the plural name? Is that the name for a collective noun? Yeah. It is as clear as that quick update. Yeah. I think it's just quick guess. That's beautiful. That's really lovely. I, something that I have discovered is that nearly all pluridims face like they're not, there's not like one standard one that's like it's just kind of like some I used, but they're not like it's a rigid classification of pluronim. Words are, it's kind of words to sort of that way. Yeah. Check this out from the, I've just gone ultra plural and from the AI overview from Google, which caused like a bunch of fucking kerosene generators to spin up and destroy a poor neighborhood. Okay. If you something to read on a podcast, so if it, vultures is the plural form of the noun, vulture. Word, the singular, vulture, plural, vultures. Wow. That's fascinating. Add an S to the end of the word. If you need help with sentence examples or collective nouns for these birds, let me know. Yeah. Oh, fuck off. I care. A committee. A group of vultures is called a committee venue or vault when, when resting, a kettle when flying in a certain, no one cares. No way. Yeah. Yeah. Committee of all just called out freaking parliament. Am I right? Yeah. Government. Yes. Shit on their own legs. Yeah. Yeah. Which is fine. Which they're allowed to do. No. It's cool. Yeah. It's not because he had 21s. Political again. She started slipping snacks to the birds, which are native to North America. That grew to her putting out about 50 pounds of raw chicken each week until the county center of warning. That's a dictics worth of raw chicken. Yeah. So much chicken. That's so much. How did it grow to that? Yeah. One more time, I guess. Yeah. So you don't notice sometimes you're like, well, maybe I'll get a couple extra thighs. Yeah. And then all of a sudden, 25 kilos of raw chicken, maybe. She said she stopped for years, but then last August about 20 v. landed no yard again. The birds appeared to underweight and some shivered with cold. She wrote. Wait, it felt I felt absolutely imperative to feed them to help them over the winter no matter what the authorities say the latest data. Yes, fuck the police. Those are the values and she's living by them. Yeah, yeah, got to respect that. Is it bad for the Valkyries? Are we so are we? I don't think so. I mean, I don't. Are we domesticating them by accident? Maybe we should. So I began leaving cat food out for the Valkyries sometimes more than 40 cans per day before switching to raw chicken. Throughout the winter, Sun estimated she fed hundreds of valkyries more than 200 pounds of chickens per day, totaling more than 10,000 pounds. Oh my god. Yeah, imagine looking outside and there are like 80 valkies in your neighbor's yard and a pile of raw chickens. That's like 100 chickens, right? Like give or take. Is that right? Yeah, how much is that? Yeah. 10,000 pounds of raw chicken. So five tons. Five tons of chicken. Five tons of raw chicken. Yeah. That's a lot of raw chicken. And they're like regurgitating that all over like the neighborhood playground and stuff. Yeah, I better fucking hate you. I probably hates this shit. Oh god, we never rule about this. So the public space into like fucking, I don't know the fourth episode in a Diablo game. Yeah. It's thinking about the Facebook community page. Anyone else kind of annoyed at the Valkyries? We're making a lot of chicken wings sometimes and like prepping them all or like, you know, cut them apart into like wings and flats and I'll be thinking, well, chickens, chicken start to this meal. And that's like four kilos of chicken wings. And you have to be a sense of this is a lot of chickens. Do that thing to be like, do I weigh this by soul? Like is this like how we're counting the effect I'm having on the world? I've only got the wings and that's not even most of the chicken. You know, you'd almost feel bad about eating meat if you thought about it. Yeah. Oh, no, not too. Okay, so if we say a pound of chicken, 10,000 pounds of chicken, this woman, not responsible for but the recipient of the deaths of 10,000 chickens to sustain a couple of hundred valkyries. A couple hundred valkyries. Like you're not like utilitarian wise, you're not. This is not morally correct. What you're doing. You can almost take this as a microcosm of the idea of just almost seem like eating animals, making bad. I'm thinking about it. Yeah. Crazy. Court records show the county first received a complaint about the valkies on January 9th and confirmed their presence the following month with two inspections. Yeah, they're valkies. Yeah. I think it's valkies. I'm just showing you looking out looking outside and just like, yeah, rolling stop in the car. You're not even like a window down. Yeah, back out the call to sack. Okay. I'm saying I do declare. Yeah. appear to be eighty son vultures. officials sent son a warning and gave her until April 3rd to clean up the decomposing chicken from her property throughout the spring. Sun continued feeding the vultures and filed appeals to the county orders. Like his neighbors, Sun's husband Chang Zhao had enough when she appealed in the first account, appealed the first county order in March he filed for divorce. It's me or the vultures. It's the fucking vultures. Holy shit dude. Fuck. Package. Or do you think maybe she can't help it? Like she wants to stop but she's like it's compulsion. No, I think I think it's like a lustro. This is the straw that broke the camel's back on this divorce. It's like she's been doing this shit forever. I'm sure. Yeah, it wasn't vultures. It'd be something else. It'd be yeah. The vultures alone would probably be fine. You know, like if it was just one thing, probably feeding 10,000 pounds of chicken just a vultures that were rooted in our neighborhood would probably be like bad. Bad, but maybe something you could have a conversation about. Yeah, or it's like an oddity that you can put up with to be like, well, you know, she's kind of weird, but I love her. In with a marriage counselor, I am divorcing her because she has fed 10,000 pounds of rotting chicken to hundreds of vultures that won't stop coming to our house. Okay, what's this really about? Yeah. What's up with the surface? They have no fault divorce because I think this one probably can't be false. I think it's some fault divorce. What do you mean when we say vultures? What's that an excuse to talk about? What do you think the vultures represent? What do you think the rot for chicken that you're talking about represents? Trying to avoid using you language or a accuser in language. You fed all these vultures. You brought vultures into our yard. I feel I feel surrounded by vultures. Yeah, but I feel disgusted by the rotting carrion that is coating the inside of our yard. When you feed 10,000 pounds of rotting chicken to vultures in our yard, it makes me feel sticky. I feel stinky. What does this represent? Actually, now that you say it, I can't smell it on both of you. I could kind of, when you were in the waiting room, I started to, what? Anybody? And then when you came in, it kind of hit me like a wet glove to the face. Jiao who was also was named to the county's violation notice, testified that he was not part of the feeding operation, but acknowledged paying for the chicken. Okay. I can't. I can't. Excessory to feeding vultures. I mean, I need $1,000. Chicken money again? Maybe. Oh, go on then. Be going. If a man won't pay for your ton of chicken, he's trash. Yeah. Throw the whole man out. And if he wasn't doing it, it would drive it underground. She would be getting like credit cards off on the side of like B. I'm glad they're talking about it. Lone sharks might have got it involved. Yeah. There is a photo in this article. A shark for chicken carcass. Someone stepped of her car boot open and just full of just like, it's not like, you know, you go to the butcher of the deli counter and you just get in the bag full of chicken. This is a chicken packaged. Or like you're like a like a, like a, a red rooster car might be driving around with a big pile of them in the back. Whoa. I mean, let's not go crazy. There might be a single layer of cardboard underneath the roast chickens that are in the boot of the red rooster car. It's just a car boot for raw chicken. And that's nasty. You know, in that Baltimore heat, that Baltimore summer. Baltimore. Baltimore. The Baltimore sun. On July 21st, after the health code department took the case to district court associate district Gludge. Gludge. So did you stick George Claude Devasti. Claude Devasti Jones found sun guilty on a civil charge of repeated failure to cease feeding vultures. Is that a specific violation? That's a quote. It's in quotations. Repeated failure to cease feeding vultures. Wow. You can't change the rules just because you don't like how I'm doing it. You know, I know it's a very technical use of the word failure there, but it's so funny to sort of frame it not as in repeated feeding of vultures. Yeah. She's like, I tried. I tried. I just can't stop. Sometimes people just can't help themselves. You know, she yeah, she's got a problem. It's a disease. Yeah. And you're only cure. More chicken chicken. For the chicken. Why don't we give her give her the job feeding the vultures at the zoo or something? Yeah. Isn't it like a gas station? A creative solution. Yeah. She can be the Vulture lady. Yeah. A zoo attached to a Walmart somewhere close. It's not going to be enough for her. Like the zoo is going to be like holding her back going. They only need to be fed like twice a day. You've already fed them twice and it's nine to six. Okay, we'll get we'll get more vultures then. Yeah. Get more vultures. I'm not I'm not satisfied. Not my fault. You don't have enough vultures. Yeah. A day later, she filed an appeal. Clarities in the case is scheduled to appear in circuit court for another trial October 13th. I'm not a lawyer, legal scholar, paralegal. On what grounds are you like? Okay. What's the appeal going to? Well, I should be. I really want to. I should be. But I love them. They're also I think they're protected species as well. Maybe these black vultures. So you know, maybe she's, you know, she's helping out. Maybe that's what it'll be. Maybe someone's going to be like, Hey, nice. Maybe she's got a great lawyer. Maybe she's going to win this. Maybe. Maybe she did get a lawyer from a billboard. It's like a problem. I just got to get in front of the judge say, uh, I appeal on the basis of a greedy disagree. Yes. No. Can't we have disagreements anymore? No, no, no, no, no, no, we stopped that. Yeah. Oh, consensus reality now. It looks like until October 13th. There'll be nothing to report about this case. We talk about there being nothing to report in the nothing to report report. ♪ It's the nothing to report report report report ♪ ♪ There nothing to report report report ♪ ♪ What happened? ♪ ♪ Nothing shh ♪ ♪ So you should mind your fucking business sister ♪ ♪ Nothing to report report report report ♪ ♪ Nothing to report report report report ♪ ♪ Nothing to report report ♪ - It's coming to us from WJBF in Georgia. Mystery business coming to Wilkes County. - Mystery business. - Mystery business. - Mystery business. - Powermong. - Yeah, yes. - Yep. - I know. - Okay. - Yeah, definitely what we're all thinking. - Ben doesn't listen to music. - I saw, I've seen Powermong live. Thank you very much. - Wow, okay. - Yeah. - Sound wave? Did she play sound? - She. - I believe that she has a way this power more. - Yeah, based on it. - And it's like, "Paramor." - I mean, was it audible? If so, I think they were playing sound waves. - That's really funny. - Jesus Christ. - It's really, really funny. - It's really good. - That's awesome, dude. (laughing) - A new business is coming to Washington in Wilkes County. What the business will be is currently a secret. It's destruction continues. The building is currently called the Pink Palace. It's not the official name, just a placeholder because of the pink look it used to have. - Okay. - Okay. - And it doesn't anymore. - We have no fucking information whatsoever. Great. - Yeah. - The building used to be pink. - The owner has a Facebook page tracking the progress of construction. The project began in January. People have been guessing what the business will be in the comments of posts. The building comes with much history. In the 1930s, it was a gas station. At one point, it was an antique shop. Quote, "The community is so interested in this project because it stood empty for so long." Washington Chamber of Commerce, Executive Director Jerry Powers said, "What they've done so far is such a massive change that everyone is queuing into all these guesses about what it could be." - It's probably a cybols. - Yeah, it's frozen. - It's frozen. - I'm gonna put down $200 that it's gonna be called something anco. - Spoons and co. - Spoons and co, and it's frozen. - Yeah. - Yeah. - What's the deal with all of the like, ampersand businesses? - Yeah. - What's the deal? - Yeah. - Someone in co, but it's not like a name-ico. - Who's the co? - It's like, who's the co? I'd like to meet the co. - Who's the co? - Bring the co, buddy. Where are they? (laughing) - Yeah, you guys have a co. - It's like table or a co. - Yeah, table or co. - Chair and co, spoons and co. - I'm seeing the spoons. - Well, I'm seeing the co. (laughing) - That'd be a whole 23 minute episode, by the way. - Yeah. - Well, obviously Kramer would have a side plot going on, but Jerry's in a business, and he's been in there for hours. They keep saying, "Can I help you?" He says, "No, just wait until you can come." "Hope you can see some co. Notice on the side that you've got some co." - I see the spoons. - Well, look at the spoons, the great spoons, but I'm more interested in the co. (laughing) - It's stupid. - It's so awesome. I love watching, whenever Jerry Seinfeld is on a comedy panel or in a documentary about the magic of laughter or whatever, he talks about his craft, like his, you know, Hattori Hanzo, like that every day he forges the sharpest jokes in the world. And then it's an episode where he's walking around, he's like, "I haven't seen any co." (laughing) It is inside of him, it's almost five. Where's the co? - Tell us about his co. - Is that documentary that he was in called "Comedian," where there was like, it was post, it was after Seinfeld had finished, and he did his, like, his, his, this is my big final, stand-up comedy show. And then he started like touring again to work up new material, because as he says at this thing, he's like, "So I was doing my hour of comedy that I have been doing for the last 20 years." - That's cool. - And the last 20 years was just him going, and then you get on the plane, and they give you these little bag speed ups. - Although did you see that he thinks that, like, audience is a two-woke now? - No, he doesn't. - He doesn't. - He has no eyes to his position. - He revises position, then that's working out. - I saw a very recent video of him. - A lot of the age of concerns. - Yes. (laughing) - More of his awake. (laughing) - I saw a very recent video of him where he said, "Yeah, a little while ago I said that, like, audiences are too sensitive now, everyone's woken shit, and you can't make jokes anymore." - Which is funny, because you can turn on, like, a comedy, like a quote unquote, woke comedy on Netflix or whatever, right? And just see, like, someone's asshole on the screen, right? Like, it'll just be somebody's supposed asshole. - Kind of like one specific example that you're thinking of. (laughing) - But you could see it. If you wanna go on there. - I like seeing the, there are people that are kind of trying to operate at the edge of being like, "Well, my politics are defined as being good. I am like, I'm progressive, you know, I have all the right values. So now I'm safe to make fun of the groups that I am now, like, so you'll see, like, cis comedians doing trans material. And like, they are on such a knife edge where sometimes everyone's like, "I saw one, there's a clip going around, I can't remember the comedian's name, as I feel terrible." But it's a joke about her being like, "I have one tip for queer businesses, you need to be open sometimes." (laughing) - That's a funny, great joke. - That's pretty good. - And then she talks about that. She was like, she was buying stickers or a t-shirt or whatever off of trans artists that she really likes. And then got an email, like a month later being like, "I'm so sorry, I forgot to send this out." And she's like, "Oh, I didn't pay that money because I wanted to get the stickers. "I'm just glad you exist today. "I just want to support that." Well, you like that? You know what, that's maybe could be lightly patronizing. I'm sure that probably doesn't reflect the experience of a ton of trans people, but there is something universal in that like, you see the cute queer bookshop that's literally open for like three days a week for three hours. You know, like, how are you doing this, whatever. And then there are other people that try to do it. There'll be like a cis man being like, "Well, there is one thing I dislike about trans people." And everyone in the comments is like, no, no, no, you have gone too hard on this. You have, like, but they're trying to figure it out. And I think that's what we're trying to do as well. We actually love Italian Americans. - Oh, love them. - Love them. That's why we're allowed to joke about them. I think it's fine. You know, hearing people talk about this is possibly the worst thing. (laughing) - Possibly the worst comedy. (laughing) - Yeah, so it'll probably be a business that sells some like cheap shit or whatever. This was definitely an episode of the podcast, Buntavista. Thank you so much for listening. We are doing a live show in Melbourne on September 11 at Keeper Brewing in Brunswick, East. At this juncture, we are sold out. But we are, that might be it, but it might not be. We're gonna see what we can do. If you were like-- - To be ear to the ground, keep your head on a swivel. - If it is ruined your life, that the way you get information from this podcast is from hearing it and it's not from Instagram posts or Patreon posts. And you're like gutted that you can't make it. MalbackBuntavista.com. I would like to know how many of you there are and what we can possibly do to sort of-- - We didn't mean for this to happen. - We didn't make it up to you. - It just, last show didn't, - Was it weeks when she said that? - Yeah. - Yeah, no, we didn't expect this to happen. So it's sold out in like-- - I thought this was the perfect number, which is two days. - I'm hoping that no one is going to be mad. - Absolutely, everybody who wants to go is there. - The last single ticket holder, who is a person who bought a one for, which we could read the name out on the show. - Now, which we do frown upon. - Very exactly the last person to get one. Also, the split is like kind of funny. Like I think the majority of tickets were bought in multiples, a lot of singles tickets. We said this at the Brisbane live show as well. - We get a lot of singles tickets. - Where else are you going to fucking meet someone? You know? - It'll be a nice convivial atmosphere. We're going to be hanging out after the show as well. - It's going to be some beer, some frisky, some really fucking good-ass pilgrims. - If you like Pilza. - You got a fucking love to fed you that we have chosen for this show. You got to go absolutely crazy. That's it. Thank you so much for joining us. If you want more of this Patreon.com/ponivist2episode every week. We might talk to you in one of those. - Bye. - Bye. - Bye. (upbeat music) (upbeat music)