Ep 642 - Popstar Halftime (feat. SWIM)

Wow, wow, Wes. Hey, hey, what's going on? What's going on guys? How are you? I'm excited? Really good. I'm excited. I just I'm excited to do a podcast. I love podcasting podcasting. When I looked over and I noticed this hockey stick mind you, why don't you pick that thing up? You're not going to believe how light and NHL stick his really? Yeah. Yo, then you really gave it an effort. What are the most athletic thing I've done? Give me a swing. What are they? What are they making them with? What? It's got to be graphite. She hit nice. Bro, we should get some street. No, no, no, this is a souvenir. That's nice. Who's stick? Uh, T.J. O.C. Yo. You've been digging on that? Have you dig a little? I dig a little. I dig a little. I was more of a goalkeeper myself. I was a bit of a tender. Really? Yeah, I was a tendi. Who's the text? I was a netminder. You know, Dallas stars. Dallas stars? You were a goalie and hockey? Oh, yeah. Did you play hockey? No, street hockey. We had, we had six set up, two sets of full pads, two nice nets. That's nice. That's great. Full pad goalies in street hockey was wonderful. That's pretty crazy. Yeah, we, we would play me, my older cousin, my cousin Pat, my same age and they would just make his fight. They'd go fight each other right now. He would drop the gloves. Yeah. And then kids, older brothers, there's one family who had all the gear, actually played hockey. So they were actually nasty blades, your sneakers blades. Yeah. And then uh, little brothers could do sneakers. Yeah. And uh, my, my hockey dreams left when the smallest little brother just rolled the ball on the ground couldn't, there's nothing like to stop it. Couldn't get down. Oh, right between here. That was that whole code. That's the five hole. Five hole. Yeah. Were you going on blades? Yeah. That's crazy. We were dead serious about it. So fun. I don't fucking hockey. It's just like one summer of fun or like, no, it's so years. Yeah. That's awesome. We would get after it. I remember, I do remember one specific game where I was like, oh, guys, my blades are busted. My brother's playing my sneaks and I was like, just cut them up. I remember one time. I think I was in like six grade, maybe coming home, tell my dad be like, God, I gotta be honest with you. I think I'm going to be a hockey player, not football. And he's like, what the fuck? That's the heart sport. You're gonna play. I mean, he was also just like, Jane, you're an offensive line. I mean, you're playing football. Yeah. And I was like, Daddy, don't understand my dreams. I'm not a little kid. It's like flights. It's like fucking. Yeah. Million dollars worth of gear. Well, you do get fucked up with the other parents at hotels. Yeah. That's true. He does rip. Yeah. I have witnessed it. You see it. You see it when we're on the road. Mm hmm. There's nothing makes me more jealous. It's being like a travel baseball or hockey families. And the kids like, kids are ourselves. Yeah, yeah. I guess it's worth it. Yeah. That will be fun. That's where the, just to get you too excited about. That's where the cuckoldry and swinging gets involved. What's cuckoldry and swing? You know. You're saying on the road. You're saying that hockey dance or cucks. I'm saying I'm saying they're not afraid to. They're not afraid to test the balance of drama within the community. Oh, damn. I didn't know there was an overlap there. Yeah, I mean, I didn't know the lifestyle overlaps with the lifestyle hockey moms and hockey dads go to the hotel bar have a couple glasses of wine and start mixing it up and go. Frank couldn't make it on this trip. It's just the hockey mom hockey dad goes, you know, I got the worst. You know, my wife died in that Zimboni accident. Now it's all news to me. Yeah, that could be bar culture though. Bar culture. It is bar culture, but don't dream. It is the same family's going on the same trips. Yeah. Yeah. They're getting a bit of a rapport and you're getting exposed. Yeah. Husbands and I've shown and this guy's like a couple of people should make the trip. Yeah. Beautiful tonight. I remember when I was working for this guy and we all got paid in the bar and I remember there was like the one, it was like we were, it was electricians and the one younger kind of upstart forming. He's a bit of a maverick. I remember he kissed one of the older guys. Why was at the bar? He got drunk and like made out of it. Oh my god. In front of the dude, he just like, they like ducked off in a corner and he's like, like gave her a sloppy kiss and then it was like a little bit of drama. That's a little company drama. That's drama for sure. It's so funny. Just being at the bar. I don't think there's much lifestyle contractor overlap. They're pretty rigid. Yeah. I think they just get cocked though. Jesus. Contractors. Well, no, I'm saying it up. They're not really swinging, but I run a strict monogamous household. Same. I'm sure the contractors were trying to. I haven't hired a contract with a young guy. Kisses your wife at the bar. That would pay to me off. That would be a huge problem. I'm always like, he was a hell of a nitrogen. Yeah. I don't, I mean, as far as like the scale of getting mad at your wife, I'd more so worry about the guy that's been texting her for a year. That's like, oh, he Andy's cool. You know, Andy's funny. I just had a discussion about emotional, it was emotional cheating. And I was like, she was breaking it down to me. And I was like, I want to keep a fuck about that. You wouldn't give a fuck about emotional cheating. I'm like, what are you going to complain to that guy? Like, I don't know if it gives a fuck. No, like they complain that he starts out. How much does it take you are than he kisses her? That's dirty mac and that's different. But that's where emotional cockledry comes in. I mean, yeah, emotional cockledry doesn't lead to any dirty mac and it takes some load off. Yeah. I guess that's not that. That's insane. The emotional emotional cheating. I just like I might get an emotional cheating. It's worse. I was like, yeah, not really. I might get an emotional bull. Emotional bull talks to her all day. That's a gay friend is guy like that. So he's kind of a dude. He's kind of a dick for doing that. Yo, those shoes are fire. What else you got? Yeah, every single guy your wife works with. Yeah, she doesn't work. You know, I mean, I was talking. Yeah, okay. I'm sorry. I thought about work husbands. Yeah, yeah, that's an emotional bull. Yeah, for sure. That's true. Then he takes the gym helper route and he takes her. Yeah, that was why you're downloading boxes in the warehouse. She had a warehouse, bro. Yes, what? And that was celebrated. It was celebrated. That dude, that's what makes it. I think I would like not really that mean. The show. He's like, good boyfriend to be like the bar at Chili's and giving out the dummies. We'd be like, all right. And Jim come to go. What? I don't know. I don't know. That was like, I don't know. It was a love triangle. Let me just had like do the office was propaganda to push cuckling on. I do think so. I feel real now. I believe that. I think it was like set up like that. It was like, fuck your blue collar hard working. Christ fear. They were trying to push ENM into like mainstream shit. That's my city started the whole thing. Sex in the city was like, get in New York for 10 years. Do it. Get fined Mr. Big and suck his dick. And then it was like, now you have an office job. You know, your boyfriend's gross. He's your dirty fuck jam. It sucks. Dang. He's actually like low key cuckling him for years. He ran like that's what I worry more about is I do like Jim slide in and he's like, oh, just a funny guy. Yeah, that's crazy. He slides in there. Obviously. It takes your wife. It takes your wife. Definitely. It takes his fiancee massive nerd. Yeah. Jim Halpert's back in. Has to be. Yes to be. Who's the who's the guy he's still from Roy? Roy. Fucking Roy was just a hard working man. How did I not notice? Roy was making deliveries. And he wasn't a bad dude. He wasn't a bad dude. No, he was just like he didn't like support her art dream or something. He's like, you're not going to art school. We have a family. God forbid. He was like, Jim was like, you should go to art school. Oh man. That was the whole plot of the office. Yeah, they like really held them up as like the quintessential love, beautiful love story. I think she tried to in the show, tried to do it again with like the sound guy or something like a guy who was filming the documentary after all those years. Wait, what? Yeah, later in the show, like he bold Jim. Oh, yeah. He was, he was one of the documentary crew. It was like the dot. What a bitch. It was the, it was like, yeah, what did a boom? My god, you're talking like late office. Yeah, I fell off. I fell off like season two or three. But the guy tried but Pam had learned and she, I think it was almost successful because I forget what happened. It was a couple times in his school. Pam was kind of the worst now that I'm thinking about. I mean, she was the best, you know. No, she was the best. She was the best. It's the lifestyle. We supported. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, Jim probably wasn't showing her much. And I disagree with what Matt said about sex. And this is the other side. Yeah, the movie's really better in the show. And I don't think anything's wrong with that. The two features were even better than the show, I think. Huh? The two sex and city movies. I didn't get to see. Oh, wait, one of them I saw with the comedian. There's a comedian. I was just fine. I didn't watch them. No, there is one. I've seen it stand up in one. It's all I know. Oh, there is. One of the girls, a lesbian lover who does stand up. The red-haired one. Yes. She became a lesbian. In the, yes, in something in Brooklyn. Oh, yeah, she got rid of her. Her hobby. I remember that. I don't remember. I watched a decent amount of S&C. Did you? Yeah. I've been married twice. So I do a lot of girls. You're a pain, dude. I'm not a pain, dude. Fuck. Fuck. You're a pain. That is true. Yeah, you have a hard work and wife, dude. What was the stand up? You had a stable heart. Stop it. That's over the line. I would be the cancel. You might have to tape my mouth. Yeah. Cancel me. Man. Yeah, that's, I had so unfortunate. I did not. It's very interesting. I didn't know. That's interesting. You say something like that. I celebrated them as like the classics. That was all about just how horny you get in office when you work together. Yeah, we work every day. Yeah. Boy Trude bangs, the other lady. - Angela. - What? - She fucking cooked and he cooked the Andy. - Oh, Andy was, yeah. - He had a whole time. - Andy was getting cooked by Angela. Somebody else was getting cooked by Angela too, right? It was just Andy the whole time. - Damn. Andy got cocked too. - Someone's getting cocked in an office. That's a fact. - That's true. - You're an office. - Somebody's getting cocked. That's a cock fact. - That's why everything's getting pushed to work from home. - Imagine getting cocked on the work from home scene. Like some guys on Zoom, like, oh, you look cute. I could go back to-- - Oh. - Slides in that evening. - Slides in the private message of Zoom. - You over here that while you're out of here playing Xbox. (laughs) - I heard you in the office today. - Don't dress up from working for home. Fuck you all dressed up. - Yeah, I'll done up for. - Not that I would actually-- - You wear a question. - You immediate. It's Zoom. (laughs) - You can't smell it. Just stand in the background. - Yeah. - Yeah, that's, dude. I mean, it is a tough one though, man. 'Cause they're like, they're really trying to like, you know, they're bringing in like, psychologists to like, gel all these personalities and try, and it's like, naturally, there's gonna be some, you know, friendly fire, yeah. - Some friendly fire. You're showing competence. You know, you're in there. You're like, yeah, you're making sale. - Highlight those four squares on a Microsoft Excel. And she's like, (laughs) - Fuck you. - Put your values up in the shots. (laughs) - They're just like your spreadsheets, fast. - You know, you can actually do this with GROC. - Oh. (laughs) - Send those emails with nice closing lines. - Cordial. - Ooh, yeah. - Sincerely. - Sincerely yours. The fact that they now office workers have AI now is so funny. That you can just, like, dude, you can just now completely fake your job. - One, and you're just AI emailing each other all day. - It's so nice. I love AI email. - Were you saying you're catching heavy AI emails that like-- - My contractor hits me with them. He gives me like, I swear to God, he gives me these emails. And I'm like, what's this part about? He's like, I'm out of never mind that. I don't worry about him, man. (laughs) I'm like, there's like four lines about it. It's so funny. I'm like, what does that have to do with anything? He hits me with big time chat GBT. - He's probably a base prompt, too. It's probably like email Matt. - That's the whole prompt. - Dude, it is. (laughs) I get these emails and I'm like, what the fuck? And they're so long. The AI emails, they'll write you like 9,000 words, all perfectly bold pointed. And you're like, I'm not really a stout. - I refuse to read this. - They're so funny. - But you just need to read that email. - I mean, no, I'll never read this. - I've never read the email in 20 years. - It's so long. I might have all summer. I'll go through chat GBT and summarize this chat GBT email and tell me what the hell's going on. It's not a bad move. - It's like summer I was just responding to it. - Yeah, yeah. I don't understand why we haven't just gotten rid of email as a thing. - Also. - Text messages. - I know. - I know. - But an attachment. - Every day my manager's like, are you getting an attachment? - I can't email me. I can't, I'm not reading these emails. I'll never read the email. - 'Cause you can send an attachment via text. - What? - And it goes, can we hop on the phone and go, can you just text? - Anything on a text. - Can you please text? - Yeah. - And text it. - Not a large file. - What? - Not a large video. - You should've been around. - Yeah, he texted me. - I made some discourse talk. (laughing) - You got all you can do. - Hey, if it's AI generated, it's not only you. - I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. - You chow at the Wheel of Fortune notes. (laughing) - That was the hardest internet loss of all time. - What? - The fucking Wheel of Fortune, dude. In the CSAM, what do you do? - What do you do? - This episode is brought to you by Bluetooth. - Oh, yeah. - Rift prompts. Personalization requested. Hey, brother. - 15 to 20 second prompt. - Do you ever rip one of these bad boys? - I've never. I'm terrified. - I'm terrified of Permabone. - You're afraid of riding the dragon. - I'm afraid of you. - I kind of want to go on low dose all day every day. - Micro-dusting Bluetooth? - People do it now, it's a new thing. - Share a time that nerves got the best of you. Where were you and how did you recover? That's a crazy, crazy person story. - That's insanely person. - I feel like I never recovered, to be honest. - No. - Yeah, whenever I'm like, if I can-- - To a relationship vendor. - Yeah, it kind of is. - I was like, I can get through it. - I walk. - For me personally, I walk once I see it. If they see it's off their walk. I'll try, I'll keep trying. I'll keep trying until she passes my head and is like, yo, and I'm like, yeah, you're right. - Bluetooth gold combines four powerful ingredients into a single tablet that dissolves under your tongue. You know 'em, you love 'em. Those Bluetooth employees are freaks, man. All they do is think of, to get you hard. So they're just saying what we said about them. - Yeah, that's funny. - And they're throwing you a bone this month right now, and you buy two months of Bluetooth gold, you get the third free with promo code drenched. You also receive an additional 10% off plus free overnight shipping on your first order. Visit Bluetooth.com for more details and important safety information. Guys, this actually, no, this Friday, I'll be in Atlanta, Georgia, October 23rd, please come to that and then Chattanooga, Tennessee. I got a big little sweep in Florida in November 6th, 7th and 8th, Fort Lauderdale, Tampa, Orlando, and then here's the one that's really haunting me, Newark, New Jersey. We're already curtain off the back. So don't you guys worry about that. Baltimore, Maryland, Columbus, Ohio, Cincinnati, San Diego, and Ball Sacramento. So, come to one of them, matmacusher.com, please. I think I'm gonna do some shows in Austin soon. So keep an eye on that. Oh, and also don't buy the tickets off the fucking internet by googling the person's name. They're gonna be like $500. Go to the website. Really official website. I get messages all the time. They go like really dude, $570. I'm like, you're buying them from like a third party website. So, don't do that. No, it was the announcer from Wheel of Fortune was on a plane and he was like in a fucking CSAM chat group. You didn't see that? No, I catch like the bottom of the internet. It's CSAM. Child sexual abuse material. Really? So he was on a plane. A fortune guy? The announcer, the guy. Not paid that or not. He's doing through a good man. The guy who's just as Wheel of Fortune. Wheel of Fortune or like, damn. Nice gig. You get an all the, all you have to do. He's like, you get an all inclusive paid trip. You want a brand new Ford Bronco, but he was on a plane. You want a paid trip to Thailand. And he popped on a CSAM chat group. He was in like a, like a bro down. So he was in like an off topic. Like they were just like, what's up bro? What do you up to today? I just like got back from some, they were just chatting. Just community. Just growing down. Yeah. But someone behind him, like looked over his shoulder and was like, what's this boomerone? Because, you know, he's got like the 500 magnified text and he was just, oh, chat with his voice. Did I stay sniping boomer's text on the phone? I read the whole, they'll like look up like really personal health shit. And it'll be like, over a siss. And you're like, oh, come on, man. I can shrink that font down. I want to see that shit. Yeah, he got popped because someone started taking pictures of him. They lost his job. Damn. I don't know if he went to jail or anything, because I don't know if it's illegal just to chat with better files. Say what's up, guys? Yeah, dude, what's up, man? What's going on? There's his old buddies. He's like, I don't really like these guys. They're just his brothers. Like they, they made their-- Growing down online. Damn. What happened to them then? He's been fired. He's been terminated from Wheel of Fortune. I don't know if he's going to jail, but he was wearing his Wheel of Fortune win breaker while he was on the plane in the chat. He was double-debb and he was trying to catch you. Yeah. Trying to get clout on the plane. He was clout chasing. Clout chasing and chatting it up. Check it out, see some. But I don't think you can get arrested for that. We're just chatting with the bros. We're just chatting with the bros in a CSAM group. No, you can't get arrested. Remember the girl meet Hunter, the guy who was-- It's a thought crime. Yeah, there was a guy who did a-- He was messaging in boards about like cooking up his wife and family and eating them. And he-- He was in New York City cop. Yeah, he was in New York City cop, but he was like, yeah, I was just kidding around. He was just-- He was like-- He said they were talking about how he was eating his-- He was planning on eating his-- He wanted to meet up and then eat his other guy. They were going to cook his family. Like Saturn? No, he got-- The crux of the case was, he met another fellow girl eater almost. Yes. And then he was like, we should-- We met a girl eater. These guys played-- He was in like a group of cannibal, sexual cannibals, right? So he befriended one, IRL, and was like, we should go down to like, Towson and eat my old college girlfriend. Yes. So they booked a trip to Towson. We didn't get in Towson to eat my girl. Dude, his screen name was Girl Meet Hunter. It was like Girl Meet 6'9" or something. That was Girl Meet Hunter. It was Girl Meet Hunter. I was Girl Meet Hunter. He was Girl Meet Hunter. And he had detailed plans of like, luring his ex-wife or ex-girlfriend to this place so they could both died on her. They're going to tell him how they were going to kill her and you're going to kill her. The perfect crime. So dude, what he did was, he had a good eater. Him and the dude came up with a plan of how they were going to eat his old, not to-- He must have liked her so much. Loved her. He must have been-- Swithard. He was the eater. He was the eater. He was the eater. Everything. He's like a 10-year-old document, love. No spoilers. So him and this bud-- He's like-- What was his name? I can't remember. I got to rewatch it. It was a fantastic documentary. What is it? I'm talking about screen names. It's going to be a funny Polish last name, isn't it? Yeah, he's like a New York cop. Yeah. So he-- Him and his bud met in real life and they went to Towson and they did all of the plan. Like they brought her to a specific restaurant and then they just went home and then when he-- Eventually his wife was like, my husband's online all the time. So she went on to go see what kind of like-- Yeah. What's the worst? He's probably looking at something weird. She finds his own girl meat. He's like eating girl websites. So he gets arrested. But in court, he was like, we were just fapping and fucking sending cool girls. Like, girl eat her stories back. and this is like, they took it a little bit into the real world. He's like, we were never going to eat my old girlfriend. - Didn't he plan to eat his family? I thought he planned to eat his wife too. - Maybe that was like-- - That was like what triggered an investigation, but they were like, they had to go before court and be like, man, this dude jerk off and we just took it into the real world. We took it into the real world, but the whole time they were meet with his old girlfriend, they're just looking at each other like, how fucking hard are you? We could eat her right now. But they didn't do it. - They did not eat her at all. - So he got off, 'cause they're like, it's not illegal too. - I think he's on probation. They made a special exception. I think he's on probation. - I think he got fired from me in a cop. - For sure. - Now he was using the cop database to make his girl eating plants. (laughing) - But he didn't do anything. - Of course. - He didn't actually-- - He didn't actually eat the girl in Towson. - Yeah. - I think it was Towson. - Man, we need to look into the girl eating, 'cause this is-- (laughing) I know, the only famous ones, Army Hammer, got in trouble for-- - He's a girl eater. - He wanted, yeah. He dabbled. - A lot of poses. - I think there were some bites. - He was nibbling like a puppy. - I think he got a new bite. - No, I think it was-- - Oh, the puppy. - Really? - I think he bit. - Who is Army Hammer? I've heard this guy. - He was in-- - He was in the Winkle Voss' in-- - Oh, excuse the freaking famous actor. - Yeah. - He was in-- - He was trying to munch. - He's Francis Ellis. (laughing) - It's literally a Francis Ellis was in the-- - Eating girls. - He was in that one movie. - Elijah Lee. - He was like a love story of him and like a young boy. - Call me by my name or something. - Call me by your name. - Oh, so he's like a hunk. - He's a hunk for sure. - He's a hunk, he's a hungry hunk. - He's a hungry, hungry hunk. - I think there's a mark. - I think he was biting girls and saying, "I'm gonna eat you." But I don't think he actually ate one. - No, he didn't eat any. He also-- - That's a hard twist. - Bro. - I think you can look up some of the alleged texts. Yeah, he was just-- - Did he get in trouble for it ever? - Yeah, he's career's run. - I think he probably should make a right wing like anti-immigrant movie this year. (laughing) - Dude, I think a lot of people got wrapped up. Is that the same with Danny Trejo got wrapped up in? - I'm not sure. - Danny Trejo got like sandbagged and they brought him into like a, like Ben Shapiro's puttin' in his movie. - Really? - That's where if I get in trouble one more time, I gotta make a right movie. - Yeah, do a Ben Shapiro movie. - I will. - What happened to it? Were they making a fire? - Interesting. - Gilly wire film? - It's interesting. - It is interesting. - I never even thought about doing Ben Shapiro movie. (laughing) - It's interesting. - Lesson less, lesson less. - Yeah. - None of us ever considered that. - It's time. - Well, they were supposed to make one to think like they unionized on Shapiro and Shapiro like shut the whole film down. I think a guy like fell out of a window or something. - Interesting. (laughing) - He didn't like unionism. - Hell no, dude, Shapiro said he goes, I'm not, I won't deal with that. I will not deal with that. Yeah, I was looking for, there was gonna be a fire daily wire movie coming out. - What about what? - I don't know, man, who knows? - Yeah, they're getting the right-wing movies. - His thing's probably, Israel Robocopper something. (laughing) - The problem is they don't have money for CGI. So they try to make all these like, you know. - But who doesn't the daily wire? - The right-wing movie guy. - Oh yeah. - So they make like a cool right-wing movie idea. - And they can't, they can't explode real sucks. - Yeah. - Do you hear about the director who was trying to make a movie about three corrupt black brothers and no black actor would take the role. So he was like, all right, I'll do AI black guys then. It's called Three Guns at Dawn. - Paul Schrader. - Paul Schrader, bro. - Protect your driver. - He's doing a movie and he's like, I'll use AI black guys, I don't care. So there's gonna be a movie about three AI black brothers. And he's, I sort of got, he's making it. - This is true, yeah. - It's a crop cop. It's a drug dealer and like some other guy who's also corrupt. - What's wrong with, why would nobody do that? - I don't know. I don't know. Everyone's like, "That's a bad look. I'm not doing it." It's like, fuck it, I was being nice by not using AI. He's like, I was being nice by offering you guys jobs. So he was saying to actors in general. - Yeah. - But he was just like. - So he's gonna have three AI black guys, cast amongst humans. - It might just be all AI now. - All AI. Might be a obvious pump that I'm like, you got to really, because AI, that's a black box. You don't know what you're gonna get. - That's true. - You got to really keep being careful with that. - Lamar, you should do it. - You would be a bad black brother. - You might as well get you into three. - You got a fantastic driver. - Dude, what do I have to say? - What's wrong with playing a bad guy in a movie? - There's nothing wrong with that. - I might not have to see this. - Well, there was that whole thing like, why did Denzel have to be evil before he got his thing? But also, this is an amazing job acting. He did fantastic. - He also stopped making black guys wear dresses. - Yeah, but I mean, what the hell? Being a bad guy doesn't sound so bad. - Why the guys wear dresses? - Why the guys love dresses? - Black guys love dresses too. (laughing) - Why the guys love dresses too? - Black guys definitely love dresses. Every, yeah. - Bro, they were trying to get my brother to put on the dress. - Wait, remember at that fucking wedding? - With that hair. - Wait, what? - Remember at the wedding when they were trying to get you put on the dress? - I have no idea what you're talking about. - Talk, this stuff. - At the wedding when a guy came out and said, "Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I do remember that." I didn't know you. - You went to a wedding. They played Oldham at Frisbee and they were like, as a joke, if you're on the brideside, you got to wear a dress while we're playing Oldham at Frisbee. - Was it the groom side that came up with this? - Yeah, you don't think so? - No, I saw the dude who came up with it. - I was even around that. I caught with the brideside guy. - So we got up and they were doing Ultimate. - Yeah. - And they were like, I was like, "Fuck it, we'll play Ultimate." - Ultimate does rule. - And I had some fucking dudes. I told them I like, six, eight cousins. I was like, "Yo, we're hiding up bro." - Guys, guys. - 'Cause it was, it was, groom's been in verse, bridesmaids were there. But then he was like, "Oh, you all have to wear a dress." And I was just like, - No, I did it. - Not doing it bro. And it was like kind of tense for a second. Then he realized I wasn't playing. - Yeah. - I'll stand on a business. I was like, "No bro." - Yeah, I mean, that's a weird request. - It was a strange request. - Yeah, you had to go tend to those down. - Someone did do it though. Who? - Austin. - No, what, Austin invited it. Austin invited it this way. Who the fuck? No, no, no, someone. - We were just, Billy was playing. - It was Billy. - Billy played with him. That's what it was. - What? And then I had a nice shot, a friend of mine. (laughing) - I was throwing a frisbee at the top of the computer. - It was Billy had some like six-year-old dude in the dress. And I had like a cinematic photo on it. It was like him having a frisbee catch with some old dude in the dress. I'm like, "Oh, Bill's having a good time with the wedding." - I can't talk shit. I still can't talk shit on Billy. He's got the nuke. - Yeah. - Oh yeah. - He's got the nuke on me. - Billy fronts like he has the nuke he never does. - He has the nuke. - He's got the nuke. - Oh, I was in it. It was me and him. - Wait, what? - He's got it. - He's got it. - I'll speak on it. It was the day Tom Brady took a picture with his son laying on him. They took a picture like this with his son's legs in between his legs. And we thought it would be funny to recreate this. - So you and Billy have a photo? - Yes. - Who was the baby? - He was. - He's a little baby boy, it is. - It's like Spider. - He's trying to get a picture. - No, fuck you, Sean. - No, with it. - It's like Spider on his face. - Then there's a picture of me. I'm wearing a cowboy hat. Both of us for some reason have our shirts off. - This might be a good time to release it. - It could be a good time. - True. - Could it hit the space he defends? (laughing) Could it hit the space, man? - Billy would ride with it. - Yeah, tweet. - Yeah, true. - Try to let Bill crack though. - What? - You know, let Bill crack. - Bill is not cracking, dude. - Bill's pierced up. - Bill is definitely bottom bill. - He's born a sub. (laughing) - I'm trying to get his ass down here too, man. - He's not moving, right? - He's not going anywhere. - Yeah. - He's also, he's got that-- - I see you looking. - He's got a puppy baby on the way off on. - Yeah, Billy's on some shit. He's got like, he's like, dog and up real hard. - Yeah, what are you doing, bro? I have one friend that did newborn and a brand new puppy and he goes, dude, for real, it was like the most fucked up thing. - This is the worst idea you can have. You got to take a puppy out. - True. - Yeah, like a big ass dog. - Yeah. - He already has two little fucking little dogs apart. - He's like, he's got like two little dogs. - Yeah, totally good. - But if you talk to Bill, everything's good. Like Bill was like, tell me, he's like, dude, I looked up a lot because I was like, bro, you're about to get nuked when you have a kid, and he's like, I looked up a lot of that postpartum stuff. It's just vitamins. Oh, okay, Billy, you got to figure it out. Get your life vitamins in it. Having a kid is going to be a fucking walk in the market for you. Get her a multivitamin. That's what we've all been missing this whole time. - I did the same thing though. Before I had a kid, I remember my older friend was like, oh, dude, like, are you ready for it? And I was like, yeah, I'll be like, having a dog, just like a person. Not a big deal. And he was like, all right, buddy, you got it. And then I got two months later with that old dude. He's so excited back there. - He loves him. - He's been skiing on you for like two months. - They haven't been skiing, they've been skiing like crazy on me. That's fine, bro. - Dude, I was, you were going, I just like, this is a good time for me to find out real friends. - Bro, it was the whole time he was, but all of them were like, "Yo, I'm gonna post my, yo, chill, dude, fucking chill." How's it fucking decent? - Well, they're doing reaction vids? - Like, like, real crazy. - Backstab, plug-and-dates, and every thousand days. - Yeah, man, dude. (laughing) - I should have, someone's got to go for it. - The comic, the comics are going for it. - Oh, are they? - Oh yeah. - Yeah, it is, bro. - There's in a bucket down here with the other. Everywhere you go. - I found down here, I told butter, it's my backup plan. - Down here, it's not that. - Comic? - What? - Full, like, Austin Hater comic. - Oh, that means dead, my brother sucks. (laughing) - Okay. - She's dead, no. - Just trash. - She ever hated it since it started, they've hated it. - Seen's dead videos slapped, though. - Seen's dead video crush. - So all you need, like, 30 seconds of a podcast clip, and someone's like, yeah, it's kind of how it's fucking awesome. Like, see, he says right here, like, Tom Square hates Austin. Like, no one wants to be there. (laughing) - And it's the move, man. Yeah, get the bag, I'll ever get it. - That's why I told him, I was like, it's my backup plan. You know, fucking, taskwrap, it doesn't walk out. - Yeah, true. - It should be like, dude, I've been here for three months. - It seems dead. - Dude, I had a good gag you could do. You roll up. - It is, dude. I don't like it. - You roll up in jeans? - It is. Gene's just Allen wrenches and you tell everyone you're Swedish Carpenter. Did you do IKEA? That's a good idea. Swedish Carpenter. I just do fucking. We can costume. Yeah, be nice. Like that, dude. That'd be nice. I like that. Swedish Carpenter be a killer hot. Did you hear the people? There's the ditty costume. We can get a costume where ditty's behind you just like gripping you from behind. I don't know if that's something like AI shit, but that was. I was like, damn, if that's a, that'd be a sick costume. There's a flame. There's an Epstein one. I was like, that's not funny. Dude, he's in the hospital. Yeah, he got hit in the head in the prison flight or something. Again, you just got to fight again. I think he's all right. I think he's just like. I think he's milking it. Yeah, he's like milking it. I'm trying to get out. I will start a shit with ditty. That's my last one. Yeah. We're his only fucking allies, right? We were saying we're going to the first party. Yeah, once he gets out, we're going. God, I see it, dude. Parties can be lit. Did he's first party? Okay. There's going to be like him and like 10 Bitcoin guys just showing out. Yeah, dude, it's fucking bullshit. Once ditty's out, everyone's going to be on his ass, like ditty. I don't I think he's yeah, I don't know. I've been trying to figure out like does he go quiet? I doubt it. No, did he's going to come? He's got a fine bad boy for life. He's a bad boy for life. He's going to come out. He's got to sign someone big though. That's going to be tough. Did he get Danny DeCane back going? Danny Kane was nice. Danny Kane fucking rocked. What do you guys think? They're back there just looking at nasty photos, man. Damn, dude. Wow. J.O. But wow. Probably girl eating. You guys might really guys. There's set no plans on girl E.D. Yeah, I do like the guys. They'll put up stuff and be like, this is actually kind of related to me. Actually, and they'll just completely just rip on it. There's a picture in the back and it's like, it's interesting. Interesting. It's interesting. It's very interesting to do that. Also, and it like, I don't know. I feel like even if you catch your sale, catches the wind, it's all and you might get a hundred followers. Best case scenario. I'll be like sick. It's all coming together. We're talking about haters. They're not haters. We're talking about this reaction reactionary reaction. They're mad. I'm out of the bucket. They're out of the bucket. They can't get you. They put you in a pan. You totally escape the matrix. That's my favorite shit. Dude, there's one guy's in trouble. I've been closely following my alpha male influencers. Last guy guy. You're the guy with the long curly, like the long curly hair. This is deep cut in the alpha territory. But there's another, there's another big alpha male fallen right now. It's in the tails over time. Apparently, just like, reigning Lamborghini's to pretend you own them. Some of the tape brothers. No, the tapes are arrested. They were doing that shit, but they weren't there. Yeah. First of all, take your, they're fucking names out. That's what you're going to give me a list of who I can talk about. Man, I'm insane. They're fucking going through legal troubles. Dude, that other white rapper. I'm not going to be about that other white rapper. MG K cool. Yeah. He's a friend of the pocket friend. Yeah. That's why I like him. I like his music. Good to wrap devil, bro. Who else could step to him? I don't know. What about the, what about a kid rock Eminem crossover? I know both of them are cool. I don't think they would cross over. They did. Did they win? Yeah. And then no, they're doing like a Christian rap thing. Eminem and kid rock are like together on some Christian rap thing. A new one. Eminem's found Jesus, bro. That's what's up. What's up? I'm happy for him. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah, just, I didn't know that that's really going on really going on. Dude. Huh? Damn. Countries finally healed. Yeah. It's what him said. That's pretty tight. Eminem and Chris Rock, or Chris kid rock. Kid rock. Damn. He'll divide. Wait for that. I did not know that was a thing. I think it's fresh off the press dude. It is. I got my year on the rail. You do have a year to rail. It's actually, I feel like Eminem sounded good. I didn't know it came out. Well, anyway, that brings us to our, all right, for a cool segment called What You On, who's in it by prize picks. The NBA is back on prize picks. Pick a shout out in the West. What? Shoot out. Shoot out there. Does that make sense? Pick a shoot out in the West. Add a board's battle in the East. Pick it all on prize picks available nationwide. And just because hoops are back, doesn't mean football is slowing down. You can make your basketball picks, add your football picks and put them all in the same lineup. Everyone and everything is on prize picks. So guys, what's you on this NBA season? Matt, what are you thinking? The team are player. I mean, dude, it's the Sixers. I'm excited. The Sixers are Philly's final hope. So I want to watch. I want to watch. I want to see how LeBron does. Is it a case of too many stars in the team? Where will they gel together? They're mature. I think he's, I think he loves distributing the ball. Yeah. You know what I mean? He's always been a distributor. Yes. And I'm not worried about it. I'll take more. Oh, whatever. I like that. Now for the branded outro. Yeah, you got it. I can't read. Now's your turn to lock in your own picks. And with prize picks, you can easily follow them with live box scores without leaving the app. It's very small. And use their social feature to find popular picks to copy with just one click. Here comes the brand of quote, the outro. Download the app today and use code drench to get $150 instantly in lineups. If you win your first $5 lineup, that's code drench to get $150 instantly in lineups. If you win your first $5 lineup, prize picks on your game. What you all? There you go. Not going to be able to play that, but. Yeah, true. Still, that's why I'm back. He's back. He made it. They never went anywhere. No, it's also nice. I mean, this could be a nice new arc for Eminem. He hits Christian. Christian rap in rock is like, it's huge massive. So real, it's like a massive, massive thing. Yeah, they have their own, like a award show and everything. I don't know how to say it, dude. No, it doesn't. It's going to be here. Just had a fucking award too. Creaking tape. True. But I'm talking about it. It does numbers, dude. Like that. Christian rap. Christian rock does numbers, dude. Yeah, dude. I think that's it. Let me say I'll go. Let me go. I remember that from like the early 2000s. Do Christian rock change, bro. Let me say you have find your way back. I understand the mega churches are big, but that won't sit with it. Yeah, that's what I mean. So like if that's big, then the other one's big. Yeah, like 200 million plays on, I'm pulled up a big Christian rapper right now. He's got like 200 million on his tracks. Damn, it does. Numbies. Christian. And that's Christian rap. I'm not talking about Christian country. Christian rock rap is where it's going to really be. Dude, if they've Christians bring back rap. No, no, that Christian rap is not rock rap. It has to be. No, no, no. It's I'm telling you, there's like Christian rap. It's like it almost sounds like what the fuck's the guy's name? The guy from Chicago in the same POD was POD was kind of Christian. Yeah, I mean, are we counting like Creed? No, Creed's definitely Christian rock. Creed was like agnostic rock. It was like Christian rock POD. They rocked. They were so good. You'd even know it, dude. It was subliminal Christianity. What was he? What was the big hit? POD's big hit going downtown or some shit? Sound side or? Yeah. Yeah. Boys from the set. Ready and not. How you like me now? Oh, it's the cross. Drop it on you. Oh, you see that? What? I got hit with the cross. I didn't see that hit with the cross. A priest. It was like a Mexican priest was like halfway through the Eucharist thing. A cross fell on the cross fell on and killed him. Be an honor. It killed. Yeah. Oh, I didn't know. It killed him down to a bunch of people. Oh, I don't know. He died. I wouldn't know. If you think it was a good get a look at funny this. Just I got long. Imagine this. I know you just got like three-stage bomb. Well, he did. I don't know. He got an honor. It's literally an honor. I got to go back and read. Yeah. Delete that guy's minute. I was just like, look at this priest get whacked with the cross. He was dead. I didn't think he died. He's looking back. Do the walls of like physics. I should have realized. Yeah. How big were we talking? Like a big boss. Yeah. It came down to him. Yeah, he got a bunch. I mean, terrible, you know, the Asian deaths this week. Yeah. Bunked by the cross off the roller coaster. Back in the day of a cross fell on you, they would like burn your body and like throw you in the lake, but he was fucking asshole. It would have thought you were like evil. They might have. I don't know. You watching the bunk. How bad is it? I never saw the one that's not blurred out. Dude. Yeah. Oh, I mean, that must have really upset the congregation pretty. If you're in there and you're praying, also, you watch a guy die by like your top symbol, just crushes him. Yeah. I mean, you could tell his his neck breaks. Oh, damn. It's bad. Oh, man. I got to start more thoroughly viewing videos right. Send them. The only time I saw it was blurred out when I hit some, but I don't know if it was. No, this wasn't blurred. Yeah, it wouldn't be funny to you if it was blurred. But I'm telling you, I saw it. You're like graphic death. Yes. I'm not a graphic. That's it. Quick way to girl eating. I've never been a shock of it, dude. Yeah. I don't like that. When they used to just like, you used to be able to watch like people get their heads cut off. Yeah. We're gonna get America's about the post the shock of it. Of what? We're gonna have a firing squad of guys. For who? On a live stream. Who? Who? You guys are just hearing this? Yeah. This is I'd they better cancel that because that's the the dumbest sense plan. Yeah. Damn. We're a live firing squad of guys and we're gonna live stream it. Well, I watched the TPUSA thing. And I thought he was like a commercial of like a, I thought he was a joke. I didn't know who the dude was. - It's a part of the war, yeah. - I had no idea. I thought that was like some. - Canceled, thank God. That was like the worst idea I've ever heard. - Fire squad? - Fire squad, I'm okay with. - Who are they gonna shoot? - Televised, just live streaming of execution. - Who are they? Yeah, who was it? - He was the Ford Hood shooter. He was a guy who shot like 2009. He shot up Ford Hood. He did kill 13 people and shot 30 others. - Yeah. - Soldiers. - So he was a soldier. So look, fire squad, I understand. - Yeah. - Public execution, live stream, that's absurd. - Yeah, it's also. - It's one of the dumbest ideas I've ever heard. - Yeah, not right now. I mean, also the video will just get out. Like you can just release the video. - They probably won't record it though. - They're gonna release it. - They probably have to for like weird military forces. - Yeah, I guess they're like, they'll probably send it. They can do a little internal memo. - Oh, and he was a paraplegic. - What? - Yeah, they were in a live firing squad. - He became a, he was a paraplegic. - From the incident. - No. - He got shot while he was killing him. - Damn. - Was he on some like. - Muslim. - And he like said. - He was like, I'm doing that. - He was a double agent. - He, in his mind decided he was a double agent. - Jesus. - And then, yeah, they were gonna fire squad a guy on a live stream in a wheelchair. - Yeah, man, we don't need that. - I mean, like handle biz, go do what you gotta do. But damn, dude, you don't gotta be putting that out like that. What is the thought behind it? Like, we need, this will like really get us. - Yeah, he's like, we need to show this country. The last time we did it was World War II. And back then, I liked our mentality. Our mentality was to win. So, dude. - By shooting a guy in a fucking wheelchair. So, just shoot 'em. I mean, that's nasty business. - Oh, so. - We'll just take 'em out with the needle. We gotta really get rid of the lady who survived the needle. - No. - We're in New Swapin right now. - Damn, dude. - I gotta get back on my way. - There was a lady who they gave her the lethal injection and she just champed it. - Twice. - Damn, they should just let her go. - That's what I'm saying. - That was your crime. - This was pretty bad. - Although she was like 17 when she did it. - Really? - What'd she do? - But she murdered a friend on the woods and then like kept her skull as like a, she'd like brought up pieces of her skull to show people. Yeah, she was. - Not good stuff. - She was 17. - She was ready to go though. - And she survived two lethal injections. They should just keep her somewhere. - Oh, second one put her in a coma and they like are resuscitating her. - They're like keeping her alive. It's like this. - Let her, like come on. - She looked like a tank. - She must be, she might be the devil. - She's like resputing, dude. - Yeah, she is. - Yeah. - Took a second one. They said the first one she was just snoring. (laughing) - They got a letter, they got a letter big. - Kind of a legend. - Yeah, it might be like, yo, you win. - As I was saying, they tried twice. Or it's got cheat codes on. - Put her next to the guy in the wheelchair. - Just hang on. - I'm at somebody who met her. - Who? - Is something guy? - I can't say who. - Hello. - What? - I got that. - What? - 'Cause they were in school in Tennessee and was studying like a criminal justice thing and they went to the prison to interview those people. - What the fuck? - And I was told that that lady was wild. (laughing) I was told that that lady was wild. - Damn. - What the fuck? - It was a crime. Her crime was nuts. It was her and her boyfriend. They tortured, murdered another job court classmate for a long time. And they were like, but they were like, beater, slow. Like not just like, and then they were like, carve and pentagrams in there. See, for it might be the devil. - Jesus. - And the boyfriend I'm sure is. - He's a dog, he's a dog. - He probably got killed a year ago. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I don't even see anything about it. - It's tough to get a lady on the death row. - There's not a lot of them, man. - So nuts that she just took the jab and was like, "Whoa." - Oh my God. - It is fine. They took it to the hospital after that. - Yeah, it's weird. - Don't you think they, yeah, just. - Giller real quick. - That was my job, I'd be like. - Yeah, otherwise there's so much paperwork. I don't mind the firing squad. - Yeah, but televising is kind of weird. - Oh, televising is insane. I'm just saying, I'm just saying in general. - You don't mind. - That's a bad way to take it away. - It's a quick way to go. You get 15. - Yeah. - 15 bullets together. - You're toast, yeah. - Hopefully quick. - Yeah, the needle, I don't sound like needles like that. I kind of might prefer the firing squad. Aim, I mean, name true, have some mercy on me. Hit me in the plug, give me the head. - But, yeah, that's the need. - The name for your chest. - Do they? - Yeah, I think the head might. - Probably go, they probably get the cross-section. - They might miss that dumb. Take a chunk out of your head. - That's strong. - Well, they do like three here, three, you know, everyone's got a spot. - Yeah, maybe so. - I know what you'd do. - What? - No, that's not where you're aiming. - No, exactly where you're aiming. 'Cause no one's gonna know who did that. (laughing) - You just go a little early. - See, right in the middle. - You go on aim, you go strong. - Oh. - Sorry. - Sorry dude. (laughing) - A snap second too early. (laughing) - Yeah, I mean, the firing squad's firing. And also, by the way, that's a military tribe. That's not on my business. That's military business. - That's military stuff. - That's military. - That's Jag. - That's jag. - That's purely guy stuff. Light 'em up. I mean, also though, my thing is if you don't like it, don't watch it. You know? - It's more about what we're doing as a country brother. - Live streaming executions is. - Come on. - The issues get rid of most, like 90% of live streams in general are pretty fucking stupid. - Tell it to rainbet. - What's that? - Stake, stake's gonna be on your ass. - Yeah. - Stake. - Stake is like the number one. It's like a gambling app. - It's into every video. - Yeah, a lot of the live streams are sponsored by Stake. That's like one of the ways you make a lot of money live. - I don't know what it is. It looks like an online casino. - Yeah. - Probably. - It always looks like a slot machine. - Yeah. - I have no idea what it is. - I think it's exactly that. - Like it's a video that's. - Within a video, like say there's a video of a guy who goes in and bothers Indian guys at 7-Eleven. - Yeah. - In the middle of it, we'll go, hold on. I gotta use this stake app real quick. - He's like handing it back to me and like just. - Oh, so he's getting paid to like while he's making trolling videos, and he's getting sponsored to make equates. To be fair, it's the good thing about them. They do fund all of the rage bait that everybody loves. Like you'll get a guy, I saw one yesterday, I could just stop laughing. I think I said that to you. - You said to me where he's like, "I'm not the one, man." - Dude, he walks up to this guy goes, and they all put on like Walmart blue vest. - Oh, oh man. - But he walks up to the guy, he's got to be a Native American dude. He's totally decked out in the gear. And he's just sitting there. He's kind of like a nerd too. And the guy walks up, he's like, "Hey, man, I saw you guys with his mom." He's like, "It's all you looking at me." Did you think I was cute or something? And the guy goes, "I'm not the fucking one, brother." It's my favorite. I'm not. You best get to stepping. - Wait, boy, you've shown him boy. Boy, I'm not the one. - People are paying sponsorships in those videos. - Yeah. - And they'll go, hold on, let me do a rain bed. They'll go into a bar. - I saw that, but I thought it was part of the skit. I thought they were making fun of product placement. - No. - They're doing product placement. - He was like, "What's the guy where he covered everything in tinfoil?" And he's like, "Rain bed." And he goes, "Hold on, let me see." And if you get three diamonds, you win a $1,000. - I thought he was making a joke about sponsorship. - Probably not, dude. - That's fucking insane. - They all sponsor anything. You can throw a basketball in a old guy's head. I'm like, "Oh, we just rained bed real quick." And rain bed's like, "Yeah, here's a thousand bucks. Good job." That's fucking demonic. - It's pretty bad. - So they're paying kids to do fucked up things on the camera? - Yes. - Probably a lot, too. - That's fucking wise. - Yeah, that's-- - I saw that. Billy sent me a video of that guy who covered himself in tinfoil. Have you ever seen it? - No. - Dude covers his whole card tinfoil. They're like, "Pulls up the car washes." And like dudes are like, "Don't touch that. Don't touch that." But it'll be like, "Rain bed." - That's a good prank, though. - That is the harmless prank. - And he's covered in tinfoil. - Yeah, that's harmless prank. - Dude's are trying to clean his car. He's like, "Don't touch the tinfoil." - That's a good prank. - That's a good prank. But he keeps screaming, "Rain bed the whole time." And I thought he was pretending. - No. - I thought it was part of-- - The guy's going into Walmart's and furniture stores and screaming. - Yeah, I love that. - I wish it wasn't the funniest thing. - The Walmart, it's so funny. - They'll go make three people with this three or four. - Three separate dudes. - And they'll all eat on it. So they'll go to like a target. And the one guy will go, (laughs) and then they come by, he'll leave. And the other guy will go, "A fuck is that?" - Yeah, they'll all blame one guy. And then the guy in the back will scream and be like, "See, I told you it wasn't me." - Once I think it wasn't me. - I wish I was 30 years younger. - I would have been. - It would have been so much fun. - A big guy hiding in a trash can in the final opening and be like, "Well, the fuck are you getting out of here?" (laughs) - The furniture store where the guy freaks out. - Oh, I like the Sir guy. Do you ever see a Sir guy who can pitch his voice and go, "Sir?" And it sounds like a woman ever goes, "Help me!" (laughs) - It's like in guest stations. - Sir, help me. - You know what the fuck was that for? - I got to find the furniture. - Do you ever, do this as a main bet one. They do what they get as speaker and they bring it to life. They bring the fast food and it's just gay porn audio so I'll be like, "I got to get a clatter out of that." (laughs) (laughs) - Allen, I need to help. - I need to help. (laughs) - What? - How far was he going at me? - I don't know what to deal with it. - I don't like it. - You know what I'm talking about. - I was in the 70s, you guys here. - I don't know. - I can't even buy myself. - Why are you shouting? - That was a meet. If you have some, I wouldn't shout it out. See? You see, they're calling you. - You're shouting out loud. (laughs) - This is real fun. - Bill said I wouldn't have done that. I came in first, I was already interested. I don't know what any of these guys. - Guys. - There's something shouting that I can't see. - Can I buy that washer? - Nah. (laughs) - Get the fuck out! That is insane this dude this guy dude get a load of this guy. It's my boy right now Yes sir. Yeah, that boy nice. Yeah, that's fucking insanity. I'm bro and then the mom after it's all done the mom's like, you work here, right? How much is this chain right? Also, sometimes they set it up where like that's a total costume of the whole thing. So yeah, there's they do it to where that guy could be a plant because there's people. There's I know these two other dudes, you ever see Chad Sean's? He goes, he wears it. It's black dude. Where's the neck brace? It's so good. And his walks in and he'll be like, Oh, fuck you. There's a guy. It's always a fucking suck you dick right now, buddy. There's no being home beep on it. I got due to a white guy walk up to him back. Don't waste your time with this fucking loser and he'll be like, a fuck you say to me, buddy. I'll fucking my dad will come here and twist your nuts and and like, I'll suck your day. I'll drain the kid and then like employees like they go back. He's like, how do you start a fight and then see who joins? That's what he's been. I met that guy. He's banned from like all the Wal-Mart's or targets and like. And then someone just came in it from like a secret angle. It's a lot of metaglasses cam for a secret angle. It's students. The funny shit in the world. Yeah, he just moved to like a new state. So because he was like kicked out of it almost every real. Okay, the real okay. But I think that's the future of the internet. It's so funny. It's just going to be nothing with videos like that as far as he could. So funny, dude. It is especially when you get dudes who were like 60 and you're like, there's another one they walk up and go, Oh, shit. Man, a lot of black dudes do it. The old black dudes over all of them like, you know, don't I know you from like they'll get some sort of information. Dude, I grew up. I remember and they'll be like, yeah, man, yeah. Yeah, man, remember you fucked me? And I'll be like, I ain't fucked up. I ain't fuck nobody's again. He used to fuck me. Like messing me up. I was little and you fucked me. You see those two brothers, those two brothers that do, uh, they'll like interview somebody to Wal-Mart and then mid they'll just both drop their shorts while they're talking about their shorts. Or make a black dude put his arm up and twirl for. Yeah, that was, I see that where they twirl the dudes on a date and they fucking snap the worst. Yeah, I can't, I wouldn't be able to handle it. Getting twirled would get any of these. I could be that guy spaz. The worst three kids came into my work and were screaming. Oh, dude. Oh, my God. There's a guy who finds like drunk guys like passed out and he runs up and puts a medic last on and picks him up by the legs and just goes, that one's pretty fun. Spinning bombs. Yeah, spinning bombs. There's a bomb spinner out there. Jesus. I hope the bombs are in on that. I hope that's fake. What is all this shit on? How am I not seeing any of this here? I'll go Instagram or like you got beat. I'll go. I do beat. I'll go. You probably have like Disney bounding shit on there. What? Disney bounding. You know, that's my. I don't know. I know. What's this? You don't have Disney bounding? I don't know. This might be the darkest corner of the internet. This is a very dark corner. You're not allowed to actually dress like a character, a Disney character. So it's called bounding where you dress like them. Like you color coordinate, like this is who I'm bounding as today. And then you go to Disney and then you do a dance, a TikTok dance. And what happens? Nothing. I don't understand the point. Well, it's kind of like Disney edge. It's like adult Disney edge where like you would wear like you would go and do it at the magic kingdom. Yeah, but no, you would go to the magic kingdom and you'd be wearing like say you want to bound is Mickey. You'd have like black pants on red polka dot shirt and like all the other people like, Oh, shit, you're mad. This is great. And like you kind of push it. Like it's you can push it to the limit as far as like people like damn, you're that's kind of on the line. Good one. You should get into Disney adulting, dude. James tapped in on the Disney bound. I'll get a good bound. It's a lot of reveal. So like you start, it'd be like you and your wife just like walking up to the camera. It's one of those like you snap and then the outfits change and your bounding is like, Gaston and Bell. Would you get kicked out? They're bounding right now. What? Yeah. Do what is this founding, bro? Where are they? Is this like next level comedy? Or they're arranged and it's like, I don't know what it is, but they did something happen because of it. Nothing happens. They're they just love Disney. Oh, damn. Yeah. Are you rid of the Disney adult scene? I'm not into anything. There's a lot of adults that fuck with Disney hard. If you go there now, you'll see a lot of adult couples just there getting like, there's like dudes that go to meet the princesses. And it's like, they're not like, they're not the bros. Was that kind of like Disney bounded. Yeah, I could see that. It's just the one I'm finding right now is just a lady who's dressing up like every Disney princess. That's not that bad of content. But then imagine you got to dress up with her. Not as a princess, but like you'd have to put on the colors coordinated clothes and make a TikTok video where you're pretending to be fucking like the teapot from the little beast. I have. It's harmless for sure. Although the kink that might come out later, the kink, I could see if you dressed up like the frozen characters and went after it, that'd be kind of chill. You mean dads, Anna, mom's Elsa? Yeah, that would be all stressing for Disney bounding would be or if you were the moose. Oh, yeah, true. A whole moose. Yeah, that is the Disney bounding. I thought it was really upsetting when I watched it. Oh, this is fucked up. They're like kids. I know. Yeah, I guess it. Yeah, just seeing your parents make content. That's my, if you kid, like, I don't like when my kids see me on my phone, let alone like recording myself. Yeah. What? Dude, maybe I'm just an old boomer now. Now I'll do it for dates. I'll let my hold the camera while I try to do plug tour dates while I'm playing piano. That's everything you get a camera into or what you're doing. I'm talking about people that are like, yeah, talking to the camera. Yeah, their kids are trying to get their attention, but they're like, hold on. I you know what I like? The people who film their really bad children are like, yeah, what the fuck? Oh, you want to talk shit to me? It's just a kid like having a complete melding figure out. It's like, look how bad this little motherfucker is. You know, like, Jesus, man. That's like a humiliating for that kid. He's on the head. You're putting him on the asshole. You're supposed to get into the bad kids algorithm. It's a lot. It's a bad-ass kids. It's a lot of bad-ass kids just being really naughty. That those kids have always been fun. That's been like a 90s talk show thing for. Yeah, that's that's true. It's always been nice. Now, you know what? Now you say it. Yeah, that's just kind of strange. I do whatever the fuck I want. My mom's a bitch. I smell weed and I fuck. Jesus. Yeah, that's fuck. You're absolutely right. I thought I was like thinking this is like a new thing. No, that kid does. Yeah, I guess that kid's been around for fun. Yeah, that's great. That's great stuff for a lady just sitting there during the day watching some fucking nasty kid being like, yeah, fucking the last hole is discipline. Yeah. Is that what's huge? That was Jerry Springer big time. Yeah, that was like all Jenny Jones. Yeah, so my parents did to me. True. They just sent my ass to boot camp and I said, I'm coming back and you're never gonna cancel me. I'm on my dad. I'm still crazy. They knew, dude. Yeah, they knew. I was nasty and mean. I forgot you want to boot camp. Don't even get me started on my days at the point. I mean, weeks was your run. Don't worry about it. I'm sorry. It's not never as a soldier there. Yeah, you can run, dude. I don't try not to talk about it. It's talking about it. I think it's classified actually a lot of it's classified. Yeah, I'm like, you can even know when I was there. They put me in the CIA. Yeah. And they they saw how funny I was. They immediately handpicked you. They saw they were like, this guy's funny. He's got fat face. It's gonna be perfect. We just need him to promote drinking. Last weekend, last weekend, you were done. You were done. You're done. Your service. I can never. It's a long one. It's a long one. It's a long white man's crack. White beer. You need to distribute this to the community. I said, I'll sell out my people. You got no choice. They fucking compromise you for you're taking excessive action when you're, you know, I was going. Yeah. Don't even want to talk about it. I was actually there too. I was a commander. No, it was a commander. That's how yeah. People say, how do you guys mean? I got office. Just common mics. Yeah, right. We met at the point. Secret mission. Yeah, I got kicked out, but they're still using me for like, yeah. Pulled out your dark ops and me. Yeah. Yeah. Private. Who started the private military? I just found out that somebody, they were mentioning someone like, oh, yeah, they started Blackwater. Forget it. They have like a famous eras, I believe. I was going to say, private militaries have been. Private has been kicking around. Yeah. But he's, when do we start in America? I mean, we're talking mercenaries, probably fucking revolutionary war. Oh, foil. Who would they contribute? I mean, I know we were fighting some mercenaries. When Washington crossed the delirious, fighting some hashings. It wasn't even British. Well, yeah, that was another, that was a big, that was a big moment for us. Really? We were like, dude, they're killing their own. I thought we were at least like, I thought this was a civil war. They're bringing Germans to kill us. Yeah. But did you find out who it was? Your Blackwater guy is again named Eric Prince, an Al Clark from North Carolina. It was in 1996, is when Blackwater was founded. I don't know how it even came up. Someone's telling me they knew like one of those two families. So yeah, their dad started Blackwater. I was like, God, hey, Jesus, what a guy. That's nice being like, yeah, I'm a star. Some of you were chillin said, my dad started it. We're like, they knew of the family or something. I told you we would say, I think you guys might be seeing. I had to, I was just in Carolina way. That's probably how it came up. I had to do a, I did do a show down in Charlotte. What's that, bro? What's that? I can't even talk on that. You can't discuss that. That's nice. That's, we're all full of Luminati right now. Nothing else to do. You got through the hand signs. Yeah, sick dude. Don't worry about what I'm up to. Damn, dude, you got to go full of Luminati. It's the only choice I have to know. That's going to either hit the space man or full of Luminati. I'll go Luminati. Jay-Z, you got to grow dreads right now. Go dreads and get real into like weird modern art. Holding dreads. Nasty. I did get in a weird modern art. Yeah, perfect. Yeah. You got to do an interview and you say, I explain your bars and be like, no, it's actually a double entendre. Yes. Do you ever see those Jay-Z videos or explains all of his stuff? It's like, that actually means like five things. We're like Rick Rubin being like, exactly. Wow, amazing. Exactly. That's been, that's been big on my count. I'm never sadder than like one 30 AM after a show. I can't fall asleep. I was watching Jay-Z talk to Rick Rubin. I'm like, what the fuck are these guys talking about? Actually, it means like three things. Wow. Wow. You can see that. Nathan, you're excited that Jay-Z is doing the halftime show? I saw it on the internet. I don't know if it's true. The last thing I heard was he said he was going to do it. I kind of like that. I think he doesn't he pick. Yeah, he's in charge. Yeah. It's picking himself. Sick move. That's the tight move. Is TPUSA still going to do an alternative one? They're supposed to. They better. Last one ripped. Last one. Last one. Last one. Last one. We got 400 live streams. I wasn't even watching. It was a joke. I watched it. I watched both the next morning. Yeah. Dude, bad bunnies was actually nice. Bad bunnies. Yeah, bad bunnies. I never heard bad bunnies. Yeah. And then after that, I was like, dude, bad bunny. Fuck it. Rips. I listen over like three more days and forgot about it. Bad bunnies was nice. It is Jay-Z. That's exciting. It's a point. It's supposed to be a lady this year. That might be rock nation. Miley. I think it was close to be a Miley and then the man. I hope it's rock nation. It's going to be rock nation. I hope you get the diplomats up there. It brings everyone out. Let me see. Cameron Dipset. There's only one guy they're going to leave out. Who? Yeah. Mr. West. Oh, yeah. That could be a nice return. Dude, they bring you back. I think he said some rotten stuff. Yeah, he ran hard on him. Yeah, I don't think, yeah, I don't think he'll. He said so you're not my friendship anymore. Yeah. I remember. I remember. Right. He probably won't be there. I don't know, dude. Friendships friendship, though. He could hit the TPUSA half time, though. Dude, they do an all-year TPUSA. They got to do the public execution in a Kanye concert for the TPUSA. And Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. For TPUSA is Kanye Live Firing Squad with the Angels walking. With the, with uh, fuck, what was the guy who owned the Angels? Less Lex, Lex, Lex. That'd be cool. What's Lex, Lex, Lex, West, and eruptive or less. He's laying low, dude, chilling. He's chilling. Doesn't remember a lot. Yeah, he's staying out all night. I just think he'd bring that up moment. Are they really? Are the Angels now in bed with TPUSA? Yeah. No. I thought Queen Erica, fucking hooked that up. Yeah. Is rock going to do it again? Who? Bob Richie going to do it again? I don't know. Damn. I hope so. The lead-up was where it was at, though. With that dude doing that song about like, I just want to drink my beer. I said could be any of those songs. No, like the one dude that came out when he was like, the guy who's talking about his knuckles. Well, there was like the three like sexy country dudes who did like the thing. And then there was the guy who sang songs like, I just want to like walk my dog and drink my beer. I gotta say that's pretty odd to bring out a bunch of sexy dudes. That was the open to literally counteract the Hispanic sexy dude. That my wife ain't watching that. Yeah, they brought me out of how white guy like cool mohawk type shit. That's fucking weird. There was a really bitch in violence, although that I will say no one. That was nice. There was a bitch in violence and the opening that the Jimmy Hendrix star Spangled Banner thing. Yeah. Brought to you. That dude. I remember watching that trying to be like, I watch bad money on program. Like, what do I think about these two things? I remember I was like, was not genuinely just wasn't for me at the TPSA. But I remember like, violence solo was nice. No one talked about it. The what? Violence solo. I was like, that kind of did. I think what you're supposed to do is watch bad money and like get all that horn in this up and then put that right in a TPSA and it brought you back down. Yeah, that's like a electrical transformer. I watched you back to that. I literally finished bad money. Watt TPSA let up. And then you were so titillated 30 minutes. I just slowly came back down. I came back down to like praying. That's not bad. Just watching the Seahawks Patriots. Yeah, you're up there just thinking about losing the family to go to Puerto Rico. You're like, I can just fucking go. I like woke up in the morning and checked my phone. I was like, oh, I watch both half time shows right now. Yeah, they were, you know, both fine. I don't know. Bad money. I don't I don't think there were time. I think there were meant to be a two partner. They were, they were meant to be watching together. True. We're never sure as strong as when we, you know, come together. There's any TPSA. It was Empire Strikes Back. They were, they, they were meant to be one long thing. Oh, okay. So you were supposed to watch bad money and then go right into TPSA and just ride them down. Yeah, because bad money was titillating. Just play bad money was titillating. That's what it was on you. Jack off. Just, just loose your fucking if you mute the Wizard of Oz, they watch bad money into TPSA. Also, what? They don't have the two guys grinding again this year. I want to be pissed. I remember that money. Two guys grinding. We're just randomly two guys humping on a truck. Yeah, there's two guys. There's two guys humping on a truck. I don't know how those two. Dude, that's the new, that should be our new play. She's just be the staple of the Super Bowl. We should just have two Puerto Rican guys smashing their dicks together for a flag. That was, that was powerful. Well, it was the, we should bring back the old, the old Super Bowl's used to be like a dog jump to a flaminate and a high school marching band. Wait, yeah, what a dog jump around. Yeah, it was literally, it was like a high school halftime show. Who was the first, it was like tassel to American women, like singing like Joine and shit. That's cool. I didn't know that. Yeah, literally in color guard in a marching band would come out. What? When did it pop off? She has Jackson's titty. No, but that was there, there was a couple of mj was before that. Oh, wow. Who was the first, the first like mega one? Mega halftime show. I don't remember. First celeb was a lady named Carol Channing in the 1970, but who was the first like over the top production? Like, it looks like Carol Channing. She was kind of had a lot of shit going on, but she was like a Broadway actress. And I guess she like did a number or something. She sang when the Saints go marching in. Yeah, it used to be five times. I'm trying to find it bigger. I would like to see, I would, I would, Michael M. James Vegas or new kids on the block with 91. Damn, I kind of remember that. That was the transit. It's labeled as the pop transit. All right. I kind of like see monkey rodeo and KOTB came up. That would be a great half time. The monkey rodeo would be sick. Yeah. Pubby bowl would be nice, too. Pubby bowl is nice. You got to do center stage for the Pubby bowl. Pubby bowl would be fine. Jay Z. Jay Z's don't have a ton of guests. I would imagine. Oh, he can also Queen B better be there. One hundred percent. Yeah, I shall be there. I'd need her to be there so I could be like, there's a Beyonce concert tonight and there's a football game on before it. What was the first to that happened? What do you mean? Where girls would be like, they'll be like, they'll be like, well, they're kind of like, there's a Beyonce concert tonight. I think there's a football game happening before it. Yeah. Yeah. Tell us what his husband's playing in the Super Bowl. Yeah, like that. Yeah. I never got it. I forget his name all the time. I've never really had a problem with that with what? I never understood the outrage of that of people being like, fucking cameras going to show Taylor Swift again. Like, yes, she's the most famous person. Yeah, like, why would they not? She's at the game. Yeah. I never understand 99 percent of outrage. Yeah. Yeah. Because things that are genuinely outrageous, no one ever complains about. True. I think that was just like, yeah, it was just like, this is all about her now. I'm trying to watch the guys trying to watch some dudes out there though. Huh? There's some dudes that could outrage my stuff like that. True. I think it really was just like, I don't like her here. I think it's like, do you know, I don't think there's anything I don't think she should be at the game. I think it's dudes that like stop mentally developing and like, they're great. They're like fucking girls. Yeah. Like, this is boys. I don't like her. I don't like her music. Get her out of here. Yeah. I know. I truly did. didn't really understand other than being like, it's all being set up and like, there's this whole ploy. I don't know. I don't know. There was that conspiracy that they were being brought together by like a CCA or someone or whatever. Whoever does their seat. I don't know what they're called. I think that means. I was trying to say CAA. What is that? CAA. CAA. So people were saying CAA. They were saying it was like a creative artist agency. No, yeah, but they were trying to say that their relationship was all stunned. I ought to like gain. Yeah, but I think their love is true. I think their love is true. I really do. I think it'd be hard to talk either of them into doing that. Yeah. How much money would you spend on that football? Like, listen, do I know you want to have a life? You just like the ratings here. We're going to buy the most important part of your life. Yeah. How much would it be to have a kid with Taylor Swift? He's like, I don't know, man. I mean, everyone's got a price. Yeah. Trillion. Like, dude, I definitely need that money. I won't have a kid with this woman. Is he retiring soon? Is he playing another season? He's probably retiring soon. I don't know if he's announced anything. Yeah. He's having a good year. Oh, well, yeah. His pods fire. His pods fire. Kels Brothers rule. Kels Brothers rule. That's my plan B. If my fucking Austin Sucks comedy videos don't work, you see me and Mack can get a brother pilot that we see what like injury like football players interview like be sick sports dudes feel like sick. I love. I love it. What football? I haven't watched it since like the Bengal Super Bowl on 88. Tom was a big Buffalo Bill said I was a Buffalo Bill said. That he should be. He said, oh, that'll get you out of it. Four straight. This was before I was straight. He was Bill's man. He was Bill's man. You know, you're smoking weed. I was a heavy bandwagon. Kevin, I was like, I got into the Atlanta braze in there in the world. See he's a torturing for not being Bill's nation. He was like, dude, you like to build. Bill's Mafia is awesome. Bill's Mafia. Bill's Mafia does rule. I thought he was. Dude, he was like early 90s. Bill's Mafia guy. Back when you picked your favorite sports team by like what starter jacket your mom happened to you for Christmas. Yep. Braves is a good one. Braves. You get to talk shit. When they were, I think I switched when they went against the Phillies. Okay. Well, there was one year where the Braves played. Oh, yeah. You were a Braves player. Crazy. Whenever I was doing the Oh, oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It would have been like 90. Yeah, they're in the 90s. Yeah. I was great. Maddox. Yeah. Who's that other dude? Dave Justice, baby. The one dude was dating. I forget it. This is did you go back? I got to whiz. How far are we? Oh, we're at one. Oh, nice. We're just getting in the sports there. Sports talk. You got to watch some football. I can't do all of the attentions. It's so exciting and fun. I don't drink either. You got to be drunk. Yeah. Yeah, drunk. Exactly. Drink it. Yeah. I can only watch it when I'm playing Padel. I'm playing Padel. Yeah. I can, I see the game. I need to get my blood pressure. I need to get my BPMs up like 120 that I can tap in. And I was like thought about getting back into drinking because it seems like fun down here. But like I'm not trying to get divorced and stuff. Yeah, I heard you were bad at it. I'm very bad at drinking dude. Yeah, that's awesome. No, dude. It's like it's like it's like three beers until like one funny joke that the lights go out. It's like it's just like naked. I can naked. Like I start walking weird. It's good. That's a creature. No, no, it's not where it's at. Dino mode is the worst. You get naked. It's our eating and they were houseplants. And it was just like dinosaur. Oh, yeah. I turned to an absolute fucking moron. There's like a shooting star. There's like 20 minutes where like I'm real fun. You're a man. Really good time. And then everyone has to distance himself from me. Yeah, because like I'll pick one person and say whatever the worst thing is possible. Yeah. And a fight star. So I'm like over here naked by the time the fight. Yeah. And then you're in the fight. You're fighting a guy on his behalf. It's the whole time. Yeah. How much were you drinking? Dude, it was always like the fifth beer shades went down. It's pretty sick actually. There was a guy who just got arrested and it was very funny. He stole a flamingo from a zoo and brought it back to the hotel in Vegas. He grabbed a flamingo out of a zoo by the guy. Shit, I would do fucking head. He's shirtless wearing jeans like like really hurting. I used to let if I weren't drinking in Philly, right? I would like leave a bar and if I had a piss, I would like walk in a hotel, go down the hallway and piss. But that obviously isn't funny that he did that. But the funny part is he's has to go to like court and he's like crying. And then they're like, how many drinks do you have? And he's like, I had 30 to 40 beers. So I would hit like the I would probably 30 to 40 somewhere around there. I would hit like the two dozen beer mark. Yeah. Well, like my lights were going out around there already. They constantly would get lower and lower. So like when I was a kid, I would drink 20 beers and keep partying. And we like, that was awesome last night. And then as I got like 19, 20, 21, it started turning into like, damn, you blacked out like seven beers three bit. I was like, that's crazy. It's the bug. You get the bug. Get the Irish bug. But I think if I started drinking now, I don't know if I think you could handle it. I could handle it. I don't think I'd get that fire in me. I think you could handle it. Like I don't have that much fire. Yeah. It's in there. You've been suppressing. I've tried like I try. I never actually quit drinking. Like when I first met my wife, like we went out and like I tried to get drunk with her. And I couldn't do it. I'll take you out for a spin. Take me out. It's just that we can get done. All right. I'll live stream it and be like rain bet, rain bet. Later. Watch new episodes of Matt and Shane secret podcast on Spotify. Do it.