Ep 631 - B.B.Q. (feat. Joe Derosa)

Wow, wow, Wes, some bullshit, you know what, that kid's an odd duck. The mayor is an odd duck. He's a real odd duck. You brought down his whole mainframe. I did. I came home and unplugged that. Yeah, I got a roommate, his name's Lamar. You see the thing is, he's an odd duck. I mean, he's got to be caution at least. I swear to God, probably 55 bucks a month in paused games. He paused games alone. He paused, he has an entire set up back there, paused his games and just goes on the road for like a week. I came back, the room's hot from his mainframe, dude, the servers are constantly. You can say, you can say wherever you are. Of course. I literally, the first thing I did when I got home was I just went back and ripped all the plugs out of the outlet. I was like, dude, enough of this. That's crazy. I throw all this shit in the pool when he gets home. It's kind of, yeah, it's pretty, it's pretty wild stuff. His electrical setup was, that was a lot of plugs he showed. He's got a moped now, that was just sitting next to the house. Where? He's got a broken moped here. I go, it's shitty, Vespa just sitting, and he's like, I'm going to fix that. This is like, this is like, you are absolutely never going to fix that. No. This is meth behavior, dude. It is. This is a lot of tinkering. Yeah, but he doesn't exhibit meth. He's not on meth. He doesn't do any meth. He doesn't have meth tendencies. He just doesn't do any meth shit. If he was on meth, he would have disassembled the moped. Yeah, true. He probably would be plugged in computers. Probably be a tad thinner, too. True. That's a rapid weight loss. Yeah. And his sleeping would not be, he sleeps more than he's awake for sure. It's all for show. Yeah. It's all for show. He's laying there like this. One eye opened, is true. He's fake. He's waiting to get back to his plugs in his mouth and make sleep for 15 hours, fold them again. Yeah. Jotaro. So. Stop dudes. Jotaro. Yeah. Jotaro. So I was just thinking the other day, you've been you've been sung that, you've been sung that in a while, too. I sang it at the beach. You did not. I did. I remember singing it. Yes. All right. Because that was like your song for me. I love it. And I love it, too. And I hadn't heard it in a while. If you sang it at the beach, I was very drunk. We only kitchen. It was in the morning. I remember I was staring at Celsius when I sang it. Okay. I vividly remember it. All right. I love it. I love it. I remember it. No one really cares about me singing this right now. That's probably annoyed. Jotaro. Is that so? Yeah. Jotaro. Jotaro. Jotaro. Jotaro. Jotaro. Yeah. I was to drive back. I mean, one of the all time bonehead choices, cake. It was cake. It was cake. It was cake. It was cake. But you're by me also the right way. Yeah. We launched right out of the gate with a KFC chicken little, three chicken tenders and a drumstick in KFC right away. Fry's. Yeah. About an hour. We're ready to settle in. Ten hours. So that's midday, extra large RBS sandwich, bag of cool range to read. You eat constant. Yeah. Right. Late night. Pull. Taking it home. Remember with cheese, bacon, double cheese, burger, fries, dude, I, I was having the time of my life. Oh, and then a king size bag of skittles somewhere in between all that. I had the time of my life driving home, dude. I was just grobin. What was the bowel movement like after three fast foods? Completely normal. No, stop. Your body. You know, the test. The test. You have to take care of all things, taking tests, eating hobbies. You are the king of the road. It's awesome. It's actually pretty impressive. I like the way you deflected the decision-making on the drive was impressive. Well, it was really impressive. As we discussed, I made a massive mistake of giving direct flights from Austin to the beach. Yeah. And I did not know that because I got travel information from Brian six. Okay. You called the bees. Bezo. And I know how to call it. You're fucked, dude. There's no fault exactly what you fucking idiot. It's just so fun. You can get your phone and be like, are there flights from, and it'll be like, yes, there are. Well, he took all bees real quick. No, no, no, no. The problem in Google and going to Bees is trying to use bees. He's my, he's my search engine. Yeah. Beezer. It's just his Beezer. Ask bees. Ask bees. Yeah. How do you spell this word? Like this? You fucking retard. What do you want to know? Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. He, the, the only thing he told me was the air, because I didn't know where the town was. He goes, this is the airport. You got to fly to. So I did go to the internet, but then it was like, no, there's just, there's indirect. There's connecting flights. Yeah. And then I found out after the fact that I said, nothing works again, but the connecting, the connecting flight argument bothers me as well. Now I hate a connecting flight. It's brutal. I just did connecting flights last week, because I had to go to Lafayette and then to Charleston. I had to drive to Lafayette, because I had to get to quicker than, because I had to fly to Charleston and then I had to fly to New York. So to rent a car, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, yeah. But the connecting flight in Dallas, where Houston is, it's okay, yeah, it's crazy. To drive. How long was the drive? And don't lie. 12 hours. Yeah. 12 hours. Like a jeep. That's so stupid. It's less than a 12 hour flight. Dude, I rode the shoulder. Like an hour and 40 minute flight, direct. I didn't know. We got to take the direction. We're at the table. We're at the beach. And he's like, fucking six fucked me on there. I'm so pissed at him. I was like, what are you talking about? It's all you. This is all you. No, I didn't. I won't get into the DM argument. I will not. I would love to get into it. I promise, I promise, I'm glad you brought that up. I promise you I'll tap out if you promise the same. I'm very curious on a new party's opinion. If they agree with you. You're not going to believe how every single person agrees with you. If they agree with you, I will tap out. I will not argue. I'm saying 99% agree. But if they agree with me, will you tap out? Can we make that a promise? I promise. Okay. Okay. Absolutely. Here's the, here's, we just lay out like this. I was saying, if you respond to a girl's story on Instagram that goes to her as a DM, and what I was saying was, yes, it's a DM, but it's not the same thing as DMing. Her. So in other words, Nate, hold on, I'd like you to start that over and repeat exactly what you said for the record. Yes, it's a DM. So you're DMing her, but it's not DMing her. No, no, no. But it's not the same. No, what world are we living in? All right. What world are we living in? Just give an example what I mean. The difference is it's still a DM, but Nate or Sean, you got girls. If your girl posts something funny, right, and I go, haha, that's really funny, turn the story. And then that sends it towards a DM. Your friends with her already versus if I just sent your girl a DM. Let's just go with the real scenario. Not these hypothetical. It was, it was a girl. That was, no, this is somebody you know, it was a, if I respond to Sean's girlfriend's story, obviously, I'm not sliding into a DM's flirting with her. Right. I was, it was a girl was definitely interesting. Also, this is kind of turning me on. You guys talking about DM in the room. Yeah. But my question is, is there, is there a difference between sliding into a girl's DM's versus responding to her story that, that she receives as a DM? I said, yes, there's a bit of a difference there. Okay. This is also knowing, knowing the person, I think's the big difference between that. I didn't know the person. Well, I knew, I knew her cause we found each other. Okay. Well, who followed who first? I followed her first. Thank you. Now, she followed me right back. Let's go with, let's go with, yeah, and then you said new DM's, which is appropriate. I don't think that's, it's, it's wild. You did start. Okay. I'm not going to do that. Story DM and a and a direct just out of the blue. Okay, now that's his question. My question is regardless is it sliding into the DMs? There is a difference and it is slide into the DMs. It's not as we both we both. Yeah, but all I never said there was a difference. I said it was sliding into the DMs and it is what it is. And I never said it wasn't a DM. I just said there was a difference. You said it was sliding into the DM. Let's bump mics. No, no, no. Come on. See, this is the problem, dude. No, you're gonna you're gonna you're trying to take a win here because this is the crazy. I'm not trying to think I win. I'm trying to say we both were a little bit right. You'd be you'd settle with the draw right now. I would not say this is unconditional surrender. You're I need unconditional. I think it truly has anything to come about the message. You're a demant. Has the man has the message has the message yielded any more fruit. Have you guys has that? No, it was it was it was a while ago and it was it was not it was not a recent thing. A while ago, but we were talking about it and I said to him, we were just we were just talking right. Right. Yeah. And I was like, and then X, Y and Z, well, it was simple. I said, I would never do that. Yes. I said, I would never slide into. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I got you. I am sliding with DMs. Yes. You did. End of discussion. Now in my defense. End of discussion. You know, Matt. You know as well as I do. Yeah. With argument, he's coming into push. Yeah, we're sitting. He starts with he starts with I would never do that. I would never do that. That's a funny thing. Immediately. What did I do? I just responded. We're storing. I did. I did this. Hello. It was one of those things that was like it was so like such a frivolous car. Yeah. We're talking. We're talking ancient history anyway. Yeah. It's water on the bridge. It got so full. You got so defensive so fast. You come in. I love that. That's like while we're hanging out the beach. I like a good argument. I know you do. It's funny. I know you do. And I'm literally there. Like, I just want to relax. And you're like, no, let's argue. That's how you relax. Yeah, but it's how I relax. If somebody says something silly like that, I'm not, I'm not going to let it go. That Pope's a little rat ass, dude. Pope is a fucking rat. What do you do? Pope, Pope the whole time, the whole time she ain't sitting there. He's going. He's going. They're all saying, you don't have to fucking shut the fuck up. You're wrong. Right? Right. As soon as you walked away, he's like, dude, you know Shane does this. And you know, he's like, he won't go over what you immediately, dude. Immediately. That fucking rat. Especially he did it a few days later. But he just started. He got a little beach arguing to go. Oh, what was that? I wasn't there. I wish I was I raced down to the beach. I was. That was the day I wasn't there. As soon as I found out about the beach argument, I got most sunshirt on and I ran down. What was Pope's beach argument that you shouldn't give college football players college degrees because they're useless. But he was like, I only care about real football, pro football. Just it bays ankles fully buried in the sand. These fucking things. Can we talk about those fucking things that Tommy drank at the beach? Oh, yeah. Oh, the bus ball of the things. It was the worst thing I've literally ever tasted in my life and he said that they were delicious. It was great. And drank not one, but four of them. Yeah. They were like 80 fun. They were rough. Those things were rough. Yeah. Pope put on a clinic. Real clinic. Our first night. How can we discuss night? We can't. No idea. He asked us not to. All right. All right. He was fucking. Mid fucking wrecking shelter. I'll first sit down by the three of us. Me. He's looking at the fucking full moon. Beautiful. Beautiful. So serene. It was quiet. You hear the ocean. He's down. The ocean. Sit there and go on. I'll tell you it goes. High noons. Okay. Neutrals. He put truly. Truly. No, he's crazy. He didn't put truly. He put. He put truly. He wasn't his right mind. No one's asking him for a ranking. No one. He was looking at the heavenly bodies. He's going, what are the rankings of the South? God damn high news. They're so good. He was truly surfside. High newtons. And I go, wait, true. Because I thought I was like, I must have been misremembering what truly is. He was doing a countdown. Maybe. Yeah. No, no. He was saying they were there. He was saying true. It might be like a Copernican revolution. It was. It could have been the Copernican revolution at the state. He burnt off. We said that. He's at stars. And he said, hold on a second. I do. I think truly is the best shelter. He's standing at the sink. He's just standing at the sink in the house. He's got Christ. That was the best. Yeah. He did. I do a shout with the. We're the kitchen. We're the kitchen. I go Tommy. Let's do a shot. He goes, yeah. Yeah. Aggressive for no reason. Yeah, we're going to do a fucking shot. Yeah. I'm like, all right. It was my idea. He's just beer breaching. You know. Dude. I pour a shot. He pours one. It's dude. It is like. It is a goal. I go. Brought some massive shot. He goes, yeah. Yeah. Whatever, man. Because I'm a fucking man. We see him. He takes a fucking. He takes it. A fucking truly or whatever it is. Pours in the glass. Dumps vodka on top of it. He goes, holy shit. Did he put in vodka in there? Was he called a splitter? Yeah. He goes, yeah. It's a cutter. It goes to cuss it. He goes like this. I swear to God, he takes a shot. He fucking bangs it. Takes a sip of the thing. And he goes, ah, Jesus Christ grabs a third drink, a surf side for me, and then just starts it. We were like, you're doing four different drinks in, I don't even think he took a breath. Yeah. Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. We got a bed. We're all just like, fuck, I'm hammered. I got to go bed going in my room. He comes running out of his room like, what are you doing? He goes, I'm going to get a piece of pizza and have some vodka. He's, he's, well, I'm just hammered watching, they're both watching the intervention. I know. Look at these losers. I do like watching them at the end of the day, just both chill. Yeah. Like A and E for a little bit. Dude, my last day there, I went on an adventure with Beezer, dude. We had the, oh yeah. We had the best fucking time, man. Beezer was land lovers, for sure. I'm sure he made your land lovers. These are trying to change the narrative. He did. He was like, Poseidon out there. Dude, he went out. He went out so fucking forward. Yeah. I was like, dude, is it true? You can't. You're like, what the fuck are you talking about? You fucking fuckers want to see me swim here. Also too, like we would say it all the time and then out of, he went, he came in unannounced and all of a sudden I turned, I was like, is that fucking Beezer? He just, he went out like a hundred yards out of the ocean was just flashing around. You guys went down the day he got there and I was like, I'm just going to hang back. I'll meet up with Beez, we'll come down. I was waiting for him. I had a couple fucking surf sides, whatever the fuck they're called while I was waiting for him. He showed up. He starts cracking him. We start banging shots. He's like, Beez is fucking gay, dude. What's going on? He hates the beach. He hates the beach. All right. We went to his bar to wear his bar. So if I wanted to fly to the beach all day, he'd be like, fuck, Beez is gay as hell. We're in this bar just fucking, we start swan. I'm like, dude, I go, I, I can't tell this fuck, never mind. I can't tell the story. That's fine. I don't think. It's probably about you guys doing drugs or something. Yeah. Yeah. It's about Addie's. Yeah. You guys can talk about Addie's, right? There's a legal prescription, dude. Yeah. Yeah. You guys are perhaps. So we took, we popped the five million before we left the house. We get to this bar, we're like, fucked up in this bar. Beezer gets two orders of, what's that, what's that shrimp called, like Bing, Bing, Bing pile shrimp. Bang, Bing, huh, was it bang, bang shrimp? Yeah, bang, bang shrimp, he gets two orders of it. He counces the first one that they bring another one. He's like, it's good, dude, he's a whole other order of it. I'm like, bro, I'm flying on Addie's right now, I don't even know how you're eating, right? I go in the bathroom, we, he's like, let's go to this other bar. I go in the bathroom, it's going to be a 25 minute drive to this other bar. I go in the bathroom. I'm swaying again. Another five millie to try to wake up. I walk out of the bathroom. I go Beez, I did take another five or he goes, bro, I just gave you a 10. I go, no, you didn't. He goes, yes, you did. You just took it. And I was like, oh, shit. Well, we're going to be in front of right now. There's probably no shrimp. You guys are probably just munching Addie. Yeah. Yeah. Just know these are good. Into the next bar. Hey, you forgot. You took the chop and I forgot just chopping it up with a 62 year old lady called you at the bar. We called you when we got back from the beach. You were still at the bar, you're like, I'm coming back, man. And I was like, oh my God, the road so you fucking dirtbag, don't come back. Oh, that was a tough one when you came back. Oh, dude. We that one will keep to ourselves. Yeah, yeah, yeah. a little messy. Say I entered his room on an ounce. I don't give a fuck. I was just high tea. I went up to the room to whack one out. You're in your room for fucking three hours. You jacked on your, that's understandable. That you had a bouncy Adderall. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I had to whack one out. You'd come to shake just opens the door. I'm like, what are you doing, dude? Get out of here. I was so calm. She was extremely calm. You were Stimphapin. Yeah. Completely Stimphapin. And there's an actual Stimphap. Yeah, it was. Yeah, I guess go get out of here, dude. And he's like, all right, close the door. He peeks his head back. He goes, I won't tell anybody to do it. I go, okay, thanks. Immediately goes downstairs. Tells everybody. I mean, just what a fucking scumbag, dude. On the scumbag, he's fucking Stimphapin. He's Stimphapin for three hours. I was in the privacy of my own room. That is sacred about you and your own. I knocked first. Yeah. And I was like, beat it. Come in now. I gave you enough time to cover up. Get out. I knocked long enough. I didn't think you were just going to walk in, man. Yeah. Figured you'd lock it if you were Stimphapin. There's no lock on the door. I tried to put all I wanted to play catch with you on the beach. You look at the full god of a room. Yeah. I wanted to hang out. I came back down. You did. I did what I had to do. You too. That's brave. I would have might have I'm going to curl up and like I'll try to drive immediately. Stimphapin. Stimphapin on. What's Stimphapin? It's what you take Stimulants and jack off. It's kind of like meth sex, but it's more private, obviously. It's more personal. Yeah. I get, I get, if I pop it out of your two, I get, I get kind of horned up. Yeah. That's the thing. People, yeah, people who are horned up. Yeah. God knows what I said to the 62 year old woman. I was probably like, you want to get married, babe? You're beautiful. I can take you out of here. I can save you. I can save you from all this. We're going to our bees. It's 15. She's like, what are you talking about? I'm rich. I'm loaded, dude. Yeah. Yeah. That was fun trip, man. That's a great beach. That beach is a, truly a gem. Yeah. Yeah. Airports have in trouble, too, because it's been, they're like travelers and vacationers have doubled in one year. So it's like a million people. Now they had two million, something like that, two million people this season. Really? Yeah. No, she's the bees wasn't completely aligned. That airport is kind of a cluster, fuck. Oh, for sure. That airport was packed. Oh, my God. Yeah. Getting in. I had a rent a car. They do that. I didn't know a car rental place has still did this where like you go to the desk and they just like, wait, they hand you a key. Usually you just get to go to the thing and be like, hey, they like, yeah, I just go get your car. There's a key in it. But they like how to go fish out a key and give you a, it took, I had four people ahead of me and it took, I sort of got like 35 minutes. That sucks. Yeah. That's the problem. That's like when you go to Key West. It's the best time, but the only part that sucks is, and they've got a new airport, but even their new airport is still, you know, it's not an international airport. Also, so you get like, or maybe it is, but you know what I mean, it's small, but my point is it's like, those trips are the kind of places where at the end of the week, you're like, I have to get the fuck home. I just like sunstroke. I've been drinking every day. Yeah. And you go in and one of those airports and you're like, God, damn it. Yeah. And this sucks right now. So the elderly are fucking brutal at air. Oh, yeah. Yeah. They get up like, they're there. They get there four hours before the flight. And then as soon as like, it's like, hey, we're going to start boarding soon. They all fucking get up with their shit stained pants and all blocked. It's like, dude, get the fuck out of the way. Yeah. They get really, they get really aggressive. Those vacations pots, all families. So the airport was just packed with kids screaming and shit. Yeah. Yeah. It's good. The internet didn't work. That was tough. That sucks. When I'm a, when I'm in an airport and a full thing, like, when you're like approaching the, you know, like, like, like, let's say you're both approaching the security thing. Where the, where the check your idea, whatever at the same time. If I'm approaching the same time as a family and the family takes the lead in, dude, I get audible. I'll literally be like, I think you should. I'm like, fuck you, dude. It's going to take forever for them to all get through. Dude, some moron fucking dad trying to fit the stroller through the fucking security. I saw a guy try to put it through the X-ray when she wants. Bro, I did. I was like, I, I'll literally start being like, bro. Yeah. Yeah. I can't, dude. I can't with that. Sometimes they try to force you to put it through the X-ray too, which is weird. The people that are like, put it through and like, it's not going to fit. They're like, you have to put it through. They do it in breaks and they're just like, I'm sorry. What the fuck? Yeah. They should let you go ahead, man. If you're like a family of four and there's one person's like, please, because it's going to take four fucking ever to get all of that shit up. The kids are like crying and you're like, hold on. It takes, it takes all day. There was a dude in front of me. So I was flying out at JFK and I was on Delta. So I went to the Delta lounge, but they have another one called the Delta one, which you know that in there. No, I'm not. Yeah, it's for international or something. It's like L.A. and international. Okay. So I just didn't know what it was. I went in and I was just like, I don't know if I can get in here or not, but I'm just going to see what it is. The lady's like, yeah, sir, you don't have access to here. And he's like, but I'm flying to Mexico. And she's like, yeah, Mexico doesn't count. And he's like, but it says right here, international, she goes, yeah, but it doesn't count. He goes, but I'm flying to Mexico. And she goes, I know Mexico and Canada don't count. You have to be international. I mean, dude, I swear to God, he goes turns. But it says international. Dude, I as loud as I could have went like that. I did the, I did the. And then I went, you were horrible. Oh, yeah, I went in with all the black noises like that. Fucking dude didn't even flinch. The psycho didn't even flinch. What? And then finally leaves. And I go, miss, I'm able to get in here. She goes, where are you going? I go Austin. She goes, no, it's international. I go, okay. And then I turned and I go see how fast I accepted it. And she goes, thank you. Yeah, I was like, yeah, a job. Yeah, but I can see you could be the guy. Hunter could be that other guy going, but it says international. Yeah, am I crazy? Here is Mexico part of America. I'm a, what are we talking about? I'm a redeemed man saying that's who I was. Yeah. And now I fight the crime. Look how far I've gone. But you slid into the girl's DM. From flying to a story is sliding into the DM. They get aggressive with that, though. First DM encounter. That's literally textbook sliding. You take it easy. I'm too. Wait, speaking to, speaking to arguments. Let me hit. I want to, I was not present for this, but I would love to reopen this can of words. Let me tell you two. It was okay. He was the real argument. It was November rain versus enter. Say, man, I was really arguing guns and roses are better than Metallica. And I got so high on my horse. I was like, dude, you two is better than Metallica. I think it might have started you too, Metallica, but you were not involved in that. I don't know. I think I started really too. Yeah. I remember, I remember it being kind of like a, I went on a very confident brand. Yeah. You two is better than Metallica. But you're, it was weird. When you were explaining to me the argument, you, you started like your team Metallica, because you go, dude, they said that the edge was better than Kirk Hammett. And I was like, there's no fucking. That was Billy. You're getting me a mistake. Oh, Billy was saying that Billy was Metallica. Oh, okay. Billy and I threw the, I didn't know much about the, yeah, I don't know much about YouTube, but I threw edge out there. I'm like, he's probably nasty guitar. I pulled up a terrible compilation of his greatest solos. I was like, socked. It's terrible. It's terrible. You two's got some great song. I mean, that's a lot of argument. But against Metallica. Not, I don't think Metallica is that good. I really don't. I'm gonna talk over G and R. I love. You're wearing all black. You're biased. You're in Lord of metal. That's true. I don't wear it's all black. That's all he wears the edge. That's just wearing a black ski hat and like July. Yeah. True. True. The, um, I'll put Metallica over over G and R. No, that was, you missed a good argument. That one got heated. It was fun. That was, that was, I was, I was going to bed and then heard everyone screaming downstairs. It was, it was also, O'Connor get, O'Connor was great. He was, he was hot by himself. He started the print argument. It's just alone. No one was even talking to him. He would just be like, weezer better than prints. And we'd be like, who the fuck are you talking to? That, that argument turned O'Connor homeless for like two hours. He was just like, the fuck you, you start naming his random bands for the 90s because he looked up. He was like, there's 2000 bands better than prints. Then he just looked up bands from the 2000s, thinking he had a list of 2000 better bands. He just looked at the top bands of the 2000s on Wikipedia and just went through and named him. Conor is that shit. He is that. Oh, Conor's, that's it. I made fun of about this on Stuff Island. This is a real argument. He made to us. We were in Westchester. We were at, I forgot the bar. But anyway, um, who's me, Shane, Jamie Linsegler. Oh, this is a great owner. This is a great owner. His fucking track. This is the night O'Connor ordered McDonald's twice in a row because he forgot and had the same order on his fucking steps twice. Yeah, we were at square point. Yeah, it's going to live across the street. Yeah. And O'Connor. go leave and get McDonalds off his step. Flat out of counter goes, name any fucking movie I can defend it. No reason. No reason. Right. I go any movie. He goes, yeah, I go young Einstein. He goes, that ain't a fucking movie. I go, yes, it is. It's not a fucking real movie, dude. I start pulling it up. I'm showing it to him. He's going, that's fucking horror shit. And then just walks out. He had a good one that night. I forget exactly what it was. He was trying to name a song, I think, and he was like, you know the song, boom, boom, clap, numbing, numbing, numbing, numbing, numbing, numbing. He was like, you guys know that, right? We're like, yeah, of course. He was like, fuck, I was thinking of a different song. Second, we will rock. It was shit fit. Him shouting over, I remember I started that argument, kind of fan into flames like laughing and I instantly just got pulled into it. Yeah. I was like, what the fuck are you talking about? Dude, we were, we were drunk in Mitzies one night and we start talking about Star Wars. And he's like, it all sucks except the Andorra. And I was like, I know you love Andorra. It's fine, man, whatever. And then we start talking about the prequels and he goes, they were dog shit. He goes, they were dog shit. I go, revenge of the Sith rips dude. He goes, it's fucking sucks. And he goes, I go, it's better than return of the Jedi. He goes, return of the Jedi as a fucking masterpiece, right? I go, the Ewoks blow. He goes, the Ewoks fucking rule, dude, right? It's my favorite. No kind of line of all time. I go, they don't rule. And it was supposed to be a plan of wookies. And that would have been so much fucking cooler to make the wookies. Yeah. Fight the fucking empire. And that's why they did it in revenge of the Sith. And he just kind of just goes, the wookies are a fucking embarrassment. Dead. Totally dead serious. It's so serious. He would literally be like, despondent. He'd be like, the wookies are a fucking embarrassment. Yeah. So I get really upset. And then I'm not paying attention. Like, what do you have said about that? He's like, fucking wookies. You need the fucking chill. Whatever's going on. Holy shit, dude. It's so funny, man. Yeah. You love a good argument. I love it. Love a good argument. I love it. You just don't like being the one who's screaming about wookies. I love a good argument, but I do get, I do get, damn it. I'm crying from that holy shit. It's so funny. I'm as much of a lunatic as a counter, but, but, but in a slightly different emotional way. You got, you were quick to get defensive. Well, it was you me and Tommy. Where's it to be? You got very defensive. And you're like, I know what you're doing. You're going to start. You're all going to gang up on me. You get it. It's like jail for just, well, because Blizzard been in the thread all day being like, fuck you, you piece of shit. I really thought someone else had his phone. I was like, there's no way. It was uncharacteristic of the blitz. I'm just blitz coming at me. I was in the group tax and just like, fuck the rest of the fucking pizza. And Joe dies. It was brutal. Yeah. Joe was on the beach. Like, dude, I know he's joked around, but like, that's like weird, dude. I mean, like, talk to him tomorrow. It was kind of weird. I mean, it was funny. And then B started coming at me and then you were coming at me. I wasn't coming at it. The second Tommy was like, yeah, Joe changed right. I was like, this fuck everybody right now. And that was, you're saying that was just a group chat before even going there. The night before, it started with bees, call me Bertha. And that fucking just rub me the wrist. There's a tropical storm. It's called the rest of Bertha. But if you get mad at getting called Bertha, you're getting called Bertha. No, no, I know. I know. I know. It wasn't I wasn't mad at him calling me Bertha. I was mad that I made a joke that I was trying to be funny with the group where I said, I said, I just drove. I go, I woke up at 4 a.m. I started driving at 6. It's 7 p.m. I just got to the house and Shane and Tommy are asleep. This is super fun. It was just a joke. I was like, God damn it. And then bees goes, I just walk past the homeless guy, spray shit against the wall. Why don't you fucking calm down Bertha? And I was like, what the fuck? Trying to like beat funny. I think it's just funny that I got here and they're asleep. Like, it was that made me chuckle. I saw that. I'm like, that's really funny to drive 14 hours. Could he use the hot, could he use the hot, could he use some support in the thread bro? I'm out there spinning. And then blizz starts just being like, you piece of shit up, you fucking done. What the fuck is going on? Dude, that's, yeah, that really threw me off. I was like, what is the, what did I do? Yeah, it was very odd that blizz was fired up. He's usually. Blizz and I as like privately as a joke to like, we fuck, you know, we said these texts back and forth, but he started going hard in the thread. And I was like, I know it's blizz. I mean, he's, I love blizz, but a lot of guy like it. Yeah. It's kind of like weird. Yeah. Did he ever show up? No. He never came. No, I think he thought it was the next week. He might be there. I didn't, he wasn't at in Charlton either. No, he was in New York. I haven't seen him in a minute. He's usually at all this stuff. Yeah. Anyway, um, yeah, I, what you got, what you got, Sean? We got the noctis on Tuesday, uh, first and third Tuesday of every month. And I'll be in Raleigh and Charleston at the end of August. And then I'll be in Seattle in Portland, September 10th and then Portland, September 10th. You know, I like you to be in front of the camera. Oh, yeah. Okay. Sorry. You know that. I know. And you wanted to stay trying to see the product. You want to be asked on camera. You're super well. I didn't want to be rude. I, you know, didn't want to be rude and intruded. You want to be invited. That's fine. Go ahead. I appreciate you guys. I'll be in Raleigh, Charleston, Seattle in Portland. Please join me. Sean Gardini.com. I'd really like to see you there. Thank you. Thank you, guys. Yeah. Guys, also August 13th and 14th. This very weekend, I'll be in Spokane, comment or Spokane, comedy club, Spokane, Washington, Portland and Boston and then Worlox, Michigan, Milwaukee, please go to matmancuster.com. Thank you. I have no shows. What's going on with you, man? What are you up to? Yeah. Special came out Netflix. Rocking. I never promised you Rose Garden. Last time I was here was the plug when it came out on YouTube. Yeah. Yeah. And then a year later, Netflix picked it up. So it's, it's out now. I'm always mystified how like these companies work. I remember some company was like, we want to re-put your YouTube special on our YouTube page for free. And I was like, okay, absolutely not. Well, they, I was like, go ahead. I guess you want to do it. I don't, you know, then people would watch him be like, why the fuck is this on this channel now? I'm like, I don't know either. I don't know. That's a business thing. I don't understand how business works. Now, dude, it's wild. Like, I, I, I work with these guys that help me with my YouTube and they're, they're, they're called wild line. They're really great. But one of the services they'll provide if you want them to is they'll go out and find all of your clips. Hey, a hummingbird. Like, oh, yeah, that hummingbird. This is all I did. It's, I miss hummingbirds. Hummingbirds better than your fucking YouTube channel. Hummingbirds are fucking sick. Hummingbirds. Yeah. Yeah. But they'll go out and find clips of, um, like a view or you, you know, from your pod or whatever, that other people just post and they'll redirect the monetization back to you. Because there's clips out there. Like people just post clips to your pod and they have millions of views on their channel, which, yeah, me and Matt have never been too good at monetizing that. It's hard. It's channels that monetize it. There's a lot to, that was a decision 10 years ago. We're like, fuck that. Yeah, fuck your system. We'll never monetize this. We don't monetize this channel. I mean, it probably does. I was, I was incorrect. What I said to you, I think if you don't monetize, it won't show ads. Yeah. That's why I said no. So on my special, they were like, do you want to monetize it? I was like, it means there's going to be ads in the whole of the fucking special now. Yeah. So that's cool though. YouTube doesn't show ads if it's not monetized. I don't monetize it because my cousin Jeff executive produced it and he funded it. Yeah. Like I want to make Jeff his money, for sure. You know, so, um, but, but yeah, but anyway, that's, that's what's going on, man. You ever get into the science of like thumbnail engineering where they'll do a, there's guys that'll do a thing where like they'll, they'll put a thumbnail out and then they'll get, they'll put like three different ones and test them. So changing all the time, whatever one gets the most, they like, swap that out after that fact, does that? Do they really? Yeah. Like, pretty wild. This shows, they'll like cycle the thumbnails. Yeah. Yeah. See who clicks on what? Yeah. They, uh, the, the, my YouTube guys do that with my podcast. They have three thumbnails and three titles and they a, b, them. Yeah. There's so much, it's kind of annoying with, with all this shit because it's like, it's, it's hard enough that we all have to like now do this other stuff that we, that didn't even fucking exist when we started doing comedy, let alone like we had a idea of it. You know what I mean? So it's like, like, we're all doing it now. We're all playing ball, but now there's like all of these. I think these other people are making shit up so that they have jobs. It could be. You're thumbnail. I got you an extra 400 views. That'll be five grand. I mean, have you ever looked at YouTube studio? It's like the analytics or it's crazy. It's crazy. Yeah. You have to learn. It's like, it's like, it's like never seen it. Warroom reports. Dude, not exactly like it at once. You don't even want to look at that stuff, dude. You look at YouTube analytics and they're like average watch time. People stopped after one minute and you're like, yeah, great. That's nice. You're like thousands of people looked at. How long are they watching? Two minutes on average. It's like, it's a fucking 45 minute thing. That's great. Yeah. It's good to know. Yeah. Yeah, I try to have some familiarity with it because I'm just trying to look at it like the way you'd look at television or something. You're like, well, this works in a certain way and whatever. So I want to have some understanding of it and I also want to understand why when money comes in, I understand why that money is coming in versus just, but you don't understand anything. Yeah. You're a businessman. Not really. What? What are you? Are you afraid of the Hogi shop? Are you still at the Hogi shop? Yeah, the Hogi's. Well, that's, I'm out of the Hogi shop. Still. No more Joey Roses. There's still me. You made a good Hogi at the beach. I made a good Hogi. You still have it. I still have it. I still have it. But who knows what the future holds? Maybe. Maybe one day I was in a bad way. I'm like, you have to be pretty savvy to that. No, no, no, I know, I know you work. I was saying I'm not a great business. You're out. Oh, really? Yeah. What was it like owning a Hogi shop? It's. You were in there getting wasted. You were acting like it. You fell down. You're a Greek guy out front of your pizza shop and you're getting carried out of your own Hogi shop. It was pathetic. I went down there. I saw you getting tossed out. I can't believe how few times you and I drank in there. That's crazy. I was in Austin. No. You weren't in New York. When did you open it? 2020. Shit. Look, I'm actually. Yeah. Shit. The whole time I was in New York. Yeah. I didn't go anywhere. I lived in New York. I did never go anywhere. I know. It was you'd always be in Philly all the time. You were doing gilling keeps and all that stuff. But like, I don't say to give you shit like, you know, I just mean, I can't believe we didn't just get wasted in there for free all the time. Yeah. But I did not not because of anything related to my shop. I just did not enjoy the experience of what it was to operate a business like that in New York City. I think I could have very much enjoyed it elsewhere. I did not enjoy it in New York. New York is a very, very hard place to operate. It is a very hard place to survive it. And it was very, very stressful for me. Yeah. It's starting like getting your license to start a shop like that is like really, really, really difficult. It's funny. All that was easy, which is this is. I don't want to get conspiracy theory or whatever, but. I felt like New York because of COVID made all of the red tape extraordinarily easy. Oh, right, right. And then once you were in and COVID ended and all everything changed, then it was like, all right, guys, now we're going to be New York about everything again. Yeah. So rent was cheaper because of COVID, the red tape was easier, the liquor board hearings, all these things were so much more amicable because people desperately, there were everybody was leaving New York City. They gave, oh, put out outdoor seating and spend all this money on it because it's going to be a new part of New York City and all this bullshit. And then COVID ended and every landlord in the city was like, your rent's going back up. Yeah. Cities like, hey, get this fucking outdoor shit out of here. Yeah. You got to be able to hide it. You can't have it out here all of it. And it was just like this fucking sucks. Like so I, I had some really, really wonderful times in that bar. I made some really great memories. It was the best phase of dating I've ever had in my life for the memories. Come to your own, come to your own establishment. It's the coolest thing ever to be like, when I go to my bar, it's pretty cool. But yeah, but that's, but, but other than that, no, I did not enjoy it. I would never open a business in New York ever again, ever again, especially now with Mom Donnie. True. Yeah. Especially with Con Donnie. You're a big Mom Donnie guy, right? Of course. Yeah. You know I am. I love taxes. I trust the government with my money. So I love giving the government money. I think that's a good choice. I think it goes to the right places. Wasn't it wild like it, like living in Texas the first time I was like, when I became a full time resident, like declared home, said it, everything, it was only a few months ago. I was part time. When all of a sudden my business manager was like, oh, dude, you don't need to worry about that. I was like, holy shit, all of a sudden that was just like, oh, my God, you saved so much fucking much. That's what I heard. I heard New York's pretty brutal. New York's crazy. Yeah. It's rough. PA is not bad. PA is good. Yeah. Yeah. PA is not bad, but, but anyway, that's kind of cool though. How long do you have before? It's still there. I'm just not involved anymore. Just sell it off or you just, I can't, I don't want to get into it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got to pay for it. You're like, it's like Trump Towers. Yeah. That's cool. Probably ways on it. Yeah. My face is not on it anymore. Okay. Yeah. I took quite, but it's still, but that business is booming. You were like a scarecrow. That's fucking mug up there. It was scaring everyone away. I got Jesus Christ. That's the guy making a sandwich. It's not eating that. There's a Tunisian family. Look at that scumbag up there. What's it called? No, I just was making sure I wasn't late. That's all. I get paranoid. The, uh, I am. Stop. What? Let me be. True. Let's talk tax regulations. No, no, no. No, good call. I didn't bring it up. He didn't know. Good call. No. Now, um. Which is asked me on my face. Did you feel like an animatronic trucky cheese thing of you in there? There's other bars. I was involved for it. Fuck you. You know, you always been an asshole to me. I'm always so good to you. And you're such a piece of shit to me. Uh, I was involved for four years. That was my favorite. That was like our best conversation. You're like, dude, you, you're cocksucker to me all the time. And how come you don't do that to soda? Yeah. You know, you don't do that to Matt or soda ever. Yeah. Because Matt and soda aren't dickheads to me. No. It's very, it's very obvious. You said it better than that. I want you to feel credit for this because it was such a, it was such a drop the bike. Go, wow, you do that to them and he goes, because they don't say the worst things imaginable to me all the time. And I go, all right. Yeah. That's the, the best part of the roadside is you're going to fight. Yeah. And then the next day you're getting a call. I'm just like, can we stop with this? Like every time we hang out, it's just like, it's like, Joe, you said I was a fucking piece of shit, like horrible person. Be, be, be fair though. You do, you do push the buttons first a little more. I do. You abs. Come on. You got to admit that much. We've had this conversation. You know, you like, we can keep track of it. You know, you like, literally, we'll walk into a green room and you'll go, well, well, look in it and find a piece of shit. No, there's one. One nothing. Let's go. You walk up to me. I walked out here. You called me barbecue first thing in the morning. Don't you like seeing me? Fuck it. I think barbecue. Yeah. All right. Good morning. Let's start. I was taking a shit. I heard that. Yeah. Yeah. Of course you do that. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I realized I killed it. I see Matt. I give him a hug. What's up, dude? You guys. What's up, man? When you hug Matt, I was kind of like, you hug me. And I didn't even realize how to barbecue. I just walked out of it. If you would have done what Matt did, I would have said something immediately. You know, dude, the dump on arrivals. The D.O.A. is fucking crazy. I was happy to see you. The dump on arrival. I heard him call. I didn't know you were here. I heard you like. I was like, that's taking a shit. Thros was talking about something midway through. I'm like, I'm sorry. I got a shit right now. The conversation. I got to go. Pardon me. Yeah. Excuse me. All right. All right. You got a point. I do it too. I see you. I definitely do. You love walking up and going. You're a big opening line. You got a real bad attitude today. You in love. Start with that. I was just going to say hi, dude. You do have a rotten attitude. Every time I see you. And then. That's such a funny thing. I just drove 13 hours. You know, these are lied to me about the airports. You get shut the fuck up, Joe. Dude, and then you'll fucking. Another one you'll do. You'll text me. There'll be some hang that you weren't there for. Next morning, you'll be like, I know what you did. You fucking. Come back. That's nice. I like to stay home. If you guys are out party and I go, I'm gonna take it easy. (laughs) I know what you're up to. Wait, there was another one you do, I was just trying to remember it, fuck. The bad attitude is a big one. - Bad attitude is a big one. - Well, well, well, well, it's nice when someone comes in. - Well, well, well, well, well. - It is. - It's like playing offense is the defense. - True. - 'Cause you know it's coming. - That's true. - I know, oh, that's what it was. I remember now, I remember now. I know when you think, I know when you think that you were fucking with me too much. And it's very nice, but you will do a thing now when we're drinking. If you think you're fucking with me too much, for no reason, you'll come up behind me and you'll grab my shoulder and you'll be like, you're a good man, dude, I love you. (laughs) I'm like, he thinks he's fucking with me too much right now. - Yeah, you get so upset. - I get upset. Sometimes with you, you're. - You're so upset. - You know how, this is how I describe you. I've described you a lot like this to all of our friends. It's not a bad thing, it's actually a compliment. - Yeah, I'm sure. - No, no, no, no. I've described this to you this way to all your friends behind your back. It's a good thing. - No, no. I swear to God, it's a good thing. - It's to your prowess of your insight into another person. - I always say, if you read the Justice League comic books, Batman, he has a way to take down every Justice League member in case they ever go AWOL. Like he's like, he's got a kryptonite bullet 'cause he's like, in case Superman ever goes crazy, we have to kill him, right? And I'm like, that's Shane, Shane is Batman. He knows exactly what everybody's kryptonite bullet is and he knows exactly how to fire it at you. I get you the most mad you could possibly get. I honestly mean that as a compliment. It's a skill that Patrice had it too. Patrice could just look at you and be like, "Yeah, you're fucking," and say the thing that you left the house thinking about. - Oh. - Like, God, damn it. (laughing) - So, deep insecurity. - It's just kind of being good. You know, he's gonna notice what I thought about when I walked out, so I got a fucking nail him. So I do tend to get a little more, yeah, you're right. - It's okay. - Yeah, maybe I'll stop messing with you. - Never. - Never. - Last year on this very pod of this very day, we tried to call the truth. - Yeah, then I walked into the green room and you're like, "Hey, look, who's here? "Fucking, top is shit." - No, no, no. - Okay. - Then you started it and then you kept going, you kept going, "All right, that's it. "I won't do anymore." - Come on, dude. - Stop. - I would make bottom, I'd make bottom. I go, "Oh, truth, truth, truth." (laughing) - Truth. - We can't, we promise. - Yeah, six beers later. We're like, "Fuck you, dude." (laughing) Just go to shit. Immediately just went to shit. - I do like the PA and O-L thing. - There's a big PA dough, the first little tax and then there's over the line. - There's over the line. - Oh, oh. - So the PA, it's like, "You PA'd me, I'm gonna PA you." - Okay. - But that's an O-L, dude. - I don't think any of us have a lot of O-Ls. - Everyone has an O-L. - What's, what's, no, I'm saying like, I haven't witnessed a lot of O-Ls take place. - Yeah, we usually don't take it that far. - No, no. The, I'm trying to think of somebody who, who does. Tommy's kind of a habitual O-L, stepper, spit on that. - Oh yeah. - That's O-L. - He did slap me in the face and mitts me. - I know slap me in the face, kind of as hard as he can. - Yeah, yeah, and I go, and you were like, you were like, "Tommy, what are you doing?" And you say, "What, what, what?" Oh, yeah. - Yeah, that's great, you just did it perfect. And I go, I go, look, it's no big deal, dude. It's no big deal, we're drunk. I don't care. I go, do me a favor. Don't wake up tomorrow, worried about this and call me and be like, "Dude, I'm so sorry, I'm embarrassed." Whatever he goes, "I'm not fucking going too, "because I'm not sorry." I was like, "Well, don't do that either." That's psychotic, but he just was so just like, I don't, and then he did call me, like, "Sorry about that." But yeah, he'll slap you in the fucking, look at me, nice slap. - He's a big slap guy. - That's wild. - It is, he's a big slap man. After a while, you'll see him slap. - Absolutely, dude. - Is it like a Robert De Niro kind of affectionate? - It is, but he takes it too far. - Yeah, yeah. - And sometimes he's a little too drunk, and he will really slap you. - True. - He? - Yeah. I was in New York the night, fucking Gomez. I'm sitting backstage at Kiltony. I didn't know who it was. Luz Gomez comes up behind me, puts me in a. Starts by like hugging me around the neck, and I'm like, "I don't know who this is." Slides into a triangle chokehold, and starts doing it so strong where I go, "Bro, bro, stop." And then fucking hurts. And he goes literally like, "You are such a pussy. "You tap, you tap." What kind of pussy says, "Stop." I go, "I didn't even know the fucking worse, dude. "Are you a psycho?" You're defending this, that is psychotic. - That's so funny. - And then he opened with it on stage, and it bombed. - Yeah. - He went out and he's like, "The road's on panel." He goes, "Yeah." - "The road's such a pussy." I put him in a triangle chokehold. He didn't even, he doesn't fucking tap. He goes, "Stop." And the people are like, "Uh-huh." - Yeah. (laughing) - At the garden. - And then he had a great set, but that first line, they were just like, "Yes, yeah, it's crazy." - Yeah, I do the move police kill people with, and he was all pissed off about it. (laughing) - That's in O.L. - Right? - That's in O.L. - Yeah, a bit of a note. Well, no. I mean, it depends how hard he is. - It's a triangle, dude. - An anonymous triangle choke from Bobby. (laughing) - It borders P-A-O-L. It's right there, it's sitting on the line. - Not defending it immediately and calling you a pussy, that's a no. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's strangling someone and then calling them a pussy. - You pussy. - Oh well. - Fuck off, dude. - She just gave one of the bodyguards like a thousand bucks and she was like, "Destroy this guy." - Damn. - Destroying him. - I would love to go get a couple of those Rogan, those Rogan troops. (laughing) - Those guys would say, "Finsky, could you do me a favor?" - Handle that. Handle that. (laughing) - Fuck, dude. - Yeah, but yeah, anyway. - Oh, the slapping. It's like Shane said, like he's not doing it to be like, fuck you, it's doing it to be funny. But it's like Tommy also gets to like, he'll hug you and it hurts. - Yeah. - And he's kissing your face. - The kissing is outrageous. - Yeah, and you're like, "Tom, this hurts, please stop." - Kissing is absolutely the most outrageous fucking thing. - That's it. - And his beard all over his beard. - His beard is wet from drinking. - Oh, I get like, dude, get the fucking. He's like, "What, I love you. God forbid somebody loves you." Fucking piece of shit, fucking asshole. It was beard like, dingz into your face. He's doing like, "Wow." - Wide-eyed. Just fucking, fucking wide-eyed. - Whatever drink I've been drinking on a fucking day. (laughing) - All right, man. (laughing) We had a nice time cooking at the beach. Me and him saw this like two and a half hours cooking. It was so, so nice. - Yeah, the meals were great. - He can fucking cook, man. - Yeah, he can. - He's like, it's unbelievable. - He's amazing. - He made like a steakhouse, like a real steakhouse dinner. - Yeah. - It's he's just sitting there the whole time, flipping everything. I'm gonna go check the steaks back and forth and I'm like, "Dude, how the fuck are you doing this?" - Dude, we, fucking resentfully serves. (laughing) After he makes a nice meal, he's like, "Hey, you fucking." - No, as soon as he's got to feed these fucking children, no one of you can make a fucking meal to save their life. - As soon as O'Connor came into it. - Oh, that was crazy. - O'Connor goes, "What's that?" Mushroom was Odo and I get, O'Connor was trying to be nice and cheery, but he was so drunk that when he saw it, he goes, "What's that?" Mushroom was Odo and Tommy goes, "Yeah." - I was so, I was walking to the bathroom. I heard it, I leaned back in. I was like, "Say thank you, Chris." (laughing) - Oh, it was so nice. Dude, the second- - Oh, it was my fault. - O'Connor was trying to be nice, I could tell. - Yeah, mushroom was Odo. (laughing) - Chris, say thank you. Don't just fucking complain that there's mushrooms. Yeah, I'm not complaining there's mushrooms. It's all your fucking piece of shit. (laughing) - Second night, we were there. It's me, Shane, Tommy. Me, Shane, Tommy. We're on the beach, Tommy's like, "I'm gonna cook a steak dinner. "I'm gonna make a Greek salad." It was amazing. We're down to the beach. We get pretty bombed up at the beach. Me, Tommy, go back. Shane's still sitting down there. I go take a nap. Actually, no, I left first and I just went up and took a nap. I wake up from my nap. I'm like, "Fuck man, that was out for like two hours." Jesus. I go downstairs. Is that hear noise? Tommy's alone in the kitchen. He's got a Greek salad in front of me, dude. He's like, "What the fuck were you?" (laughing) I go, "I was upstairs." Sleepy goes, "I'm in the fucking weeds. "I'm working my fucking ass off down here." He was yelling at me like it was a real restaurant kitchen. I was like, "I never said I would help you "with any of this fucking weird meal you want it to cook." The Greek salad was incredible. It was the best Greek salad. I don't even like tomatoes like that. I was like, "These are delicious." It was amazing. He was so honest. management. Oh, so funny. Guys, I love you. I got to roll right. Um, Joe, congratulations. Yeah. Thanks. Uh, I never promised you a rose garden on Netflix. Now, please go watch it. And my new podcast found horrendous on the one on my YouTube at your toast. You're in ties. Tyres season three. Yeah, it comes out Thursday. Thursday, awesome. And uh, live dates, joderosa.com. Guys, thank you, man. This is fucking off course, man. This is special. So this was a special one. Thanks, man. Wait. Fuck off. Pick it. Oh, watch new episodes of Matt and Shane secret podcast on Spotify. Do it.