Ep. 4: Dismiss Urges to Binge: Component 1 (View Urges to Binge as Neurological Junk)

If you ever feel out of control around food, you're not alone, and you're in the right place to learn practical, no nonsense information about why you binge and how to stop. Binge eating does not mean that something is wrong with you. It's a natural, but primitive brain response that you can correct. If you're ready for change, sign up for the brainover binge self-paced online course for less than $20 per month. And if you feel you need personalized support, we also offer one-on-one coaching and group coaching. To learn more, go to brainoverbinge.com/subscribe, and I hope you enjoy the show. This is the Brainover Binge podcast where we share a simple brain-based approach to ending binge eating. I'm Katherine Hansen, author of the book's Brainover Binge and my newer book, The Brainover Binge Recovery Guide. I'm very glad to be co-hosting this show with Master Coach and author, Cookie Rosenblum. Hi everyone. I want to welcome you to our podcast and let you know that we really have you to support you in your goal to make binge eating something that you used to do, so welcome today. Thanks Cookie. Our goal in this podcast is to share information and insights to help enable you to quit binge eating. We want to empower you, and we also want to encourage you, and we want to keep recovery as simple as possible to help you get on a clear path to freedom from binge eating. If you've listened to previous episodes, you'll know that we aren't going to be focusing on your other problems. We are only going to be focusing on how to stop binge eating. So far, you've learned that the urges to binge are the only direct cause of binge eating. We've also learned that these urges come from a more primitive part of the brain, a part of the brain that's in charge of our survival drives, and our habits. We call this part of the brain the lower brain. You've also learned that the lower brain cannot control your actions, that you always remain in charge of what you do because you have a higher brain. Because of the higher brain, you can learn to stop acting on the urges to binge, and then your urges to binge can simply go away. To do this, to stop acting on the urges, we're going to teach you the skill of dismissing urges. Dismissing urges is the first recovery goal in the brain-over-binge approach. Dismissing urges means that you're going to learn to have a binge urge, but not give it attention and not act on it. You're going to learn to dismiss it. Until this point, you may have felt like not acting on a binge urge was impossible, or at least extremely difficult. You understand that binge urges can make you feel like you have no choice, but we want to put the power of choice back in your hands. We want you to be able to choose not to act on an urge to binge, without it feeling like an impossible struggle, or something that is unbearable or unmanageable, like it may have felt in the past. What we're going to teach you will allow you to experience your urges in a whole new way, in a way that makes it possible to choose not to follow them. The skill of dismissing urges is about changing your perspective when the urges arise, so that you can avoid letting them drive you into automatic action. In my books, I teach five components of dismissing urges to binge, and today we're going to be discussing the first component in detail. So there are, as Catherine just said, five components of dismissing the urges to binge, and I'm just going to tell you what they are to start, but know that we'll go into each one of them in detail in the next few episodes. We're going to cover component number one in detail, because that's a really important starting point for you. So here they are. Number one, view the urges to binge as neurological junk, and we will explain that today. Number two, separate the higher brain from the urges to binge. And number three, stop reacting to urges to binge. Number four, stop acting on the urges to binge. And number five, my favorite, get excited. Now all of these components work together. So each time you have an urge to binge, by using them, you can experience your urge in a new way, in a totally different way. You're going to learn about all of these five components one at a time, but we know that they all work together, and they kind of flow together. They don't feel so very distinct and separate, but they all, once you begin to work on number one and see the urges as neurological junk, all the other steps will more easily flow after that. The five components of dismissing the urges to binge, we need you to know that it's not a magic formula that's going to wipe away your urges. But what it is going to do is make your urges disappear if you continue to practice teaching your brain that your habit of binging is not necessary anymore. And the way that you do that, as we've talked about, is you have to let the urges come up and not act on those urges to binge. And that allows neuroplasticity to work to change your brain and erase the habit. So you're going to have a new habit of seeing the urges and not acting. It will come up, you will see it, you will not act on it. And then it will start to come up less often and with less intensity until it's just pruned away from lack of use. Exactly. And the first step in doing that is to see these urges in a new way. And that's really what component one is all about. And like Cookie said, the first component of dismissing urges is to view the urges as neurological junk. And this means that you're not going to be giving the urges value or attention. Neurological junk means kind of just what it sounds like it's junk from the lower brain. It's just some neurons firing in a way that they shouldn't be. But also in a way that's not meaningful to you. The binge urges don't signal a real need or something that you truly want. The binge urges are an automatic signal from the lower brain. Because right now your primitive brain thinks you need to binge to survive. It senses that you need to maintain this habit, but you actually know better. So as soon as you hear the thoughts encouraging you to binge, as soon as you feel this feeling and this craving, we want you to immediately label it as junk from the lower brain. Now this is very different from a lot of the traditional recommendations you may have heard before. In other approaches to stopping binge eating, common advice is to really analyze the urges to binge and discover their deeper meaning. For example, do the urges mean that you have unresolved stress and you're feeling a need to binge to cope? Or does it mean you're feeling lonely and you want to binge to comfort yourself? We don't feel viewing the urges to binge in this way is helpful in most cases. Instead of analyzing the urge, we want you to see it just as a faulty brain signal that means nothing important to you, there's no deeper meaning. There's nothing in the urge that means something to your higher self. Your goal with this step is to view that urge as meaningless, as harmless and as powerless. And we know this is different than the way you probably experience it right now. We want you to try to view that urge as nonthreatening and experience it without a lot of fear, without a lot of anxiety. What we don't want you to do is fight it. We don't want you to try to run away from the urge. So with this step, with this first component, you're not necessarily doing anything specific, but what we want you to do is try to see the urge differently. And there are specific things that we're going to ask you to not do. You're not going to be giving the urge's consideration. You're not going to make them important, no value. Give them no attention. It's more a matter of seeing them differently than doing something differently, no engaging, no negotiation. We don't want you to try to decipher the meaning of the urge's or try to analyze them, no debates. And think about it this way. When you get an urge and you respond to it, it's like somebody is hitting you a tennis ball on a tennis court and you hit the ball back automatically. That's what you do when you respond to the urge. We want you to think that you're not going to get on that tennis court and hit that ball back. The urge will come up, but you're not going to respond to it. That's right. We want you to get to a place where as soon as you feel that first sensation, at first feeling, that first thought that encourages binge eating, that you immediately and deeply see it as junk from the lower brain. And what that can do is it can really prevent the urge from building and strengthening. Even if you did give the urge's attention and value in the past and thought they signaled some deeper meaning like an emotional need, remember that they are no longer serving you. These are urges and the binge eating habit is causing pain in your life. And these urges really aren't coming from you at all. They're coming from a primitive part of your brain that is separate from your higher self. So, component 1 is all about seeing the urge differently, in a way that makes it feel less compelling. If you can learn to view these urges as neurological junk, you'll already feel much less tempted to act on them. And cookie and I share these principles and share these components in a group course that we teach together, so we see a lot of the common issues that come up. And when learning about the first component to view the urges to binge as neurological junk, what tends to happen is some people view some urge thoughts and feelings as junk, but then other thoughts and feelings they give value and attention to. For example, you may be doing well, dismissing urges, but then you may have a thought that says something like, "Well, just binge one last time and then you can start over," or "You need to binge to relax after this hard day," or something like, "You've already eaten some unhealthy food today, so you might as well binge." And suddenly, you may find yourself starting to believe those thoughts, and you might even follow them and binge. And what we want you to do is not give any of these thoughts value. We don't want you to give anything that promotes binge eating, any attention regardless of the actual content of the thought. The content of the thought doesn't matter. It's the fact that it's encouraging you to binge. The goal is to view any thought, any feeling, any physical sensation that encourages binge eating as neurological junk. It's interesting, Catherine, as you said, that people will believe that this one is different. This urge feels real. This feels special. So sometimes the thoughts that you give value to and you don't recognize as neurological junk are the thoughts that say that you need to binge to cope or relax or have some stress relief. Now, in the moment, we know that these thoughts can be tempting. But inevitably, after the binge, you always realize that it didn't give you any of those benefits, and it only made things worse. Always try to remember that the only real relief you will ever get from binging is relief from the urge, but binging to get relief from the urge only reinforces it and ensures that it will keep coming back and your habit will get stronger and stronger. So if you can apply this component that we talked about today, the first component, then urges are going to begin to feel more manageable so that you can accept the presence of the urge and allow it to pass and see it for what it is without feeling like you have to act on it just to make it go away. So when that urge comes up, we know that it seems like it's offering to help you, right? And if you do feel stressed or overwhelmed, you may think you do need relief, and it's offering your relief. It's so tempting, but know that that relief is false because it's being offered by your lower brain, and always remember that every time you act on it, you're just reinforcing it. Exactly. It just makes everything worse. Any problems that you are having, it makes them even even more unmanageable. So if you can learn to view the urges as junk, it can really transform the way you relate to them and give you the ability to stop acting on them. So that wraps up today's episode. Next time we'll be teaching you component two of dismissing urges. So we hope you can join us again to learn about that. And we also want to remind you that you can get a copy of my free ebook, The Brain Over Binge Basics, and also Cookies Free Book by following the links in the show notes. We are here for you, and we know that you can do this. So if this approach makes sense to you, commit, commit to doing this for yourself, and we will be here for you to help you learn how and reinforce the new habit of not responding to those urges and making them a thing of the past. We hope you can join us again. And for now, this is Katherine Hansen and Cookie Rosenblum reminding you that you have the power to rewire your brain and live a binge free life. The Brain Over Binge podcast is produced and recorded by Brain Over Binge Recovery Coaching LLC. All work is copyrighted by Brain Over Binge Recovery Coaching LLC and all rights are reserved. As a disclaimer, the host of the Brain Over Binge podcast are not professional counselors or licensed health care providers, and this podcast is not a substitute for medical advice or any form of professional therapy. Eating disorders can have serious health consequences and you are strongly advised to seek medical attention for matters relating to your health. Please get help when you need it and good luck on your journey. Need more help? You can find all of our current and upcoming options for support at brainoverbinge.com.