Ep 311: 3 Bars. 10 Hours. Catalina.

This is an "I Heart" podcast. Guaranteed Human. - Honey, is it on? Is it on? Is this thing recording? This is your girl, T.S. Madison, coming to you loud live and always and forever in color from the outlaw spot, cats with me, T.S. Madison. This week, Laverne Cox is back. We're talking about her new book, Her Controversial X, and going off on the red carpet. - 20 minutes later, it was like, "Let's squash this, let's talk about it." I was like, "No, you do not talk to me like that. That is unacceptable." - I walked around, it's like, "We need to break up." - And can you ever really change a man? Listen to Outlaw, the T.S. Madison, on the "I Heart" radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. - I am talking to a felon right now with face tattoos, and I cannot decide if I like him or not. - That was a caller from my podcast, Therapy Gecko, where I speak with anonymous callers about their problems, relationships, and anything else in the depths of their mind. It all happens on my show, Therapy Gecko. So if you're trying to get out of your own head and into someone else's, this is the podcast for you. Listen to Therapy Gecko on the "I Heart" radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. - Why do some women yearn for Shakira's black hair to make a comeback? And whatever happened to the power couple of my dreams, Mariah Carey and Luis Miguel. I'm Maria Garcia. You may remember me from my podcast, Anything for Selena, or my devil. And now, I'm back to unpack more stories from the present and the past. Listen to "Muy Excited" with Maria Garcia on the "I Heart" radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. - New school year, same, beautiful mess. Good mom's bad choices is back to talk back to school realness. The guilt, the giggles, and the choices no other show is brave enough to admit. - Mom life is calling. I have my last motherfucking volleyball tournament of IRIS club team volleyball, and I cannot wait for you to be over. Because I don't like participating and having to drive for our distances, shout out to the moms and my mom made it happen. - Listen to "Good Moms" bad choices from the "Black Effect" podcast network on the "I Heart" radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. - Welcome to "This Is Important," the production of "I Heart" radio, the show where we only talk about what's the most important bottom line, critical thing happening on this planet. Today, on "This Is Important," dude just popped my cherry, holy shit. And the Hulk's cock was a fountain. Pops back and sprays so much shit everywhere, dude. Buckle up. - Been in it, been in it, been in it, been in it. - Yeah, we did, we did, wow. - Dude, we were just talking off-pod, and dude, there's just telling this fucking sick story about how he had to cut up piece of wood. - Dude, it gave me a man bone. - And that shit was important, dude. How often are you cutting wood? - Yeah, shout out Milwaukee. Milwaukee Power Tools Company. - Yeah. - Yeah, saw Blake's cup said, dude, great merch. They should have more merch. And they had sent us boxes. Adam said he never used the axe, and I said, dude, I used it just a few weeks ago. Cut a four by four and a half, dude. - That makes it a two by two, right? - Fucking wood shooting everywhere. No goggles on. - Eyes work. - I don't know what I'm talking about. - Yeah, I feel like I never have the opportunity to cut wood. And I know some, I understand it's like a, it's a kink in my armor, a kink in my armor, whatever's in in the armor. - Sure. - It is kind of scary to say these days. - Yeah, I don't know if I could say kink in the armor, but it's a dent, it's a dent. - It's a huge wealth. - Yeah, it's a kinky dent in my armor. - And I feel like you're not getting rid of it. I think you just made it worse. - What a little rewind. - Oh, you comboed the, oh I didn't, well regardless, it's a dent. - Takebacks and apologies. - I want to be more of a man. - Don't I? - And I understand tools are a huge part. It can't all be just my chisel physique, you know, and the facial hair I'm gonna be able to grow at some point in my life. It's not all that hard as we might try. - It's not that. It's also you have to be able to use tools in the proper fashion. - I'm a dude. - Yeah, it's know-how. It's called know-how. - 'Cause I have tools. - Data-tools. - It's obviously chisel physique. - Yeah. - You've got the physique. - You've got the data tools. - You have the data-tools. - But do you have the know-how? - I don't have the know-how. That's right, because I have the tools. - Like stripping cable. Have you guys ever striped a cable? - What does that even mean? - Have you ever welded? - No, I've never welded. - What is the way? What is stripping, I've never welded. I've always wanted a weld. Very badly. - That's a good one. - I feel like that's a good, that's what like, if you work at Time Warner, you talk about jerking off. It's called stripping cable. - Yeah, what exactly is stripping cable, please? - Yes, points. - Well, also jerking off if you're a welder, if you could be like, I'm smelting cocks. - Smelting. (laughing) - I'm smelting some iron. - Yes, points. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Sure. - Yeah. - Absolutely. - Smelting rod. - Smelting some rod. - Like that. - Yeah. - Bending some bar. - Well, I feel like if you were to get into one type of tools, if you're going to get into tools. - Sure. - Yeah. - Do you, I mean, you got to go straight to melding, right? - Yeah, melding, welding, either works for me. - For one reason, the mask. - The mask is off the fucking hook, dude. - The like, flip down with the visor. And then when someone comes in and talk to you, flip it up and you go, - You have to flip it up. - What? - Yeah. - Can I help you? - Give me two. - It's not the mask for me. It's the torch. It looks like you're about to start on fire at any moment. - Oh yeah. - And you're braving that. - Sure. - Well, you're working with hot lava. - Oh. - Oh my god. - You're basically a lava bender. - The amount of power you have right there. - Oh my god. - Look guys, I just want to remind you, you flip the mask up to just say like, I'll take two, and then when they walk away, you go like this. - You'll take two, or are you ordering a sandwich? - Yeah, of course you will. - 'Cause who's coming in? - You're in a drive through. - What's going on? - You're good buddy, who's also well done. - Hey brother, how are you? - He's on the phone, or is Uber eating? Your wife comes in. - How come he sandwiches? - This is what happens. When your wife finds out you're in the garage or wherever you're welding, guess what? - He's coming in. - Estrogen kicks in. - Yeah. - That's exactly right. - 'Cause there's so much testosterone. She's like, I'm gonna get him food. Or I'm gonna make him a sandwich. - I told you. - Yeah, then she walks away. - Yep. - You go like this? - Who? - And it flips the mask back down and you get back to work. - Yep. - And you click it down, fuck legendary dude. And that's not even for it. That's how manly you're being. Your wife has walked away. That's not even for her. - Yeah, that's just how fucking tough you're being alone in the garage. - That's for the ring cameras later, for you. - Yeah, fuck off too. - What? (laughing) - What? - No. - Go ahead, Roman. - I'm revoking your Milwaukee cup. - I'm talking welding, baby. - I'm revoking. - The pack out. - Yeah. - Nothing quite like a pack out. - Or you wanna be, I'd say either you wanna be a welder or a melder, or you wanna be one of those guys that just takes a log, an absolute log. - And you're. - Rip-up. - I did that on your boat. - You did. - You rip open the chainsaw. - Yeah, we're talking alone there. - And you just fucking carve into it. - And then you just made like a really thin bear. - I mean, that you can like put on a doorstep at a cabin. - Okay. - You're saying like a chainsaw like artist. - You're, you fucking rip up some art in this log. - You know they use chainsaws to also carve ice. - Yes. - That's kind of manly, right? Big block of ice. - Terminate. - Weirdly less manly. - Man, you just fucking, well, I like what we're taking it. A lot of, I feel like a lot of men would just be going, yeah, I use the chainsaw to chainsaw something to fix, to repair something, and we immediately, we're just artists. - Yeah. - And we just want to do art, even if it's with a chainsaw, even if we're welding or melding something. - I want to tell a story. - It's going to be a piece of art. - Yeah, I want to tell a story with it. I want to make a predator statue. - Yeah. - I want to do some statues. - Can you imagine you get a cabin and as to everyone's got bears out front and then you just have a nine foot predator? - Dude. - Dude, I did just see you on the Instagram. - Oh, love it there. - I love it there. - It was just like, what a fun place. It was just like a backyard pool, swimming pool, and then over it, they had like a 12 foot tall hulk statue with a giant hulk cock hanging out of his pants. - Yeah. - And he's pissing into the pool. And it's like a waterfall, and I'm like. - Is this artist? - No, no, it doesn't seem. - I think it was real, it might be real. But it seemed pretty real. - It did. - And she had like multiple, I saw a different video where it showed he had multiple like superheroes standing over his pool. And then the hulk was the only one with his cock out. - And the hulk's cock was a fountain. - Yeah, yeah, dude. It's badass. - Is this the guy with the gym? Is this the guy with like the superhero gym? - No, that guy is off the hook. - That's what I thought maybe it's the superhero gym guy, but it's not the superhero gym guy. - Shout out to superhero gym guy. Yeah, let us know when you get a Hulk with a cock out being into your pool. Yeah. Yeah, then you've made we need Until then I mean, what are you doing? Nothing's really super nothing's really shocking me about your insane Absolutely unreal Jeff. It's very very cool. Well, he's an artist, you know, even though he's a man He's an artist and he wants to bring his his comic arts into his gym and this guy wants to bring his comic arts into his And he was pool absolutely man. You guys ever watched the lumberjack like Olympics or whatever like fucking Upstate Wisconsin Tota. That's one that if it's still happens if I see that on on ESPN Ocho I'm tuning it the Ocho, you know, if I'm that that's not an ESPN one or two That's going right to the Ocho and I'm tuning in that one is different from the like the strongest man in the world competition, right? Yeah, completely different. Okay, totally different. Yeah, what are what are some of these events? There's people involved What are some of the events like log role one their lumberjacks and then the other they're like 600 pound Giant absolute mountain people magnus of a Magnumston. Yeah, shout out Yeah, the other like lumberjacks have to be I mean, they're big burly strong guys, you know, we would fit in sure I think it depends on the event, but they have to be pretty athletic. They're running over logs. Okay. What logs are spinning There's four events I can think of there's log spinning which is its own dance climbing up the pole with the bell There's the climbing up the pole and then back down. Yeah, there's the buzz song up and down and up and down the hell buzz on up and down to like Cut the you don't know what I'm talking about. There's a performing this Sorry chain saw you got a chain saw the chain saw they're like ready to go and there's a log that's horizontal and it's like you Grab it start it go down go up go down and you're cutting discs. Oh like little little loaves of bread Okay, yeah, four times for time. Thank you like little loaves of bread that really painted the story Yeah, you're making a sandwich and then there's the one where you chop in with the axe and then you slide the plank in and you Climb up and you do it again. Oh, that's right. Yeah, that one is sick. That's right. That one is sick. That one's fucking sick Yeah, and there's just the two person back and forth with the long one. Oh, where you're just you have to yeah, that's classic That's some looney tunes shit. That's a good one. I feel like we could get involved. It's been white for sure. Oh That's the main Blake. I feel what I said. Well, we're we're common law married. We just renewed our vows. Yeah, we're My friend. We just we kind of just renewed our vows if you ask me but in Catalina, we buy you buying me the shirt that was renewing our Vow. Some was news. Yeah, you're wearing the wedding ring that I just bought you. It's called this is my Line shirt Adam needs a cup Milwaukee. Yes, send me some stuff. You know, I'm trying to Oh, yeah, please and the shirts I run in it all the time. I love it. It's like day glow. Great logo. Also, maybe maybe give me more tools Maybe they'll inspire me, right? You know, I think I need to take a fucking lap at a lows or a home depot or my Boys over at ace hardware that and you just go in and look at some tools decide I'm gonna buy a fucking tool. Yeah, I'm gonna go I'm gonna buy a tool. I don't know what I'm gonna do with it. I'm gonna make a statue I'm gonna make a statue. I gave you a Milwaukee drinking glove right Adam. I yeah, I still have that. I do still have that at my Like 40 something birthday. Great. Great glove. Was it a Milwaukee drinking glove or oh, yeah, not a KK a Milwaukee power tool. I don't know if I still have that I think I have the KK. I think I have the KK. This is the way either way. I don't know. Yeah, you have you must great You musty must the KK is a bar in Wisconsin in Madison, Adam. You have your hat. Yeah, or you have your shirt I have the hat. Yes, you do. It's your real wiki wicker. Mm-hmm, and I still got some ocean water up my ears Honey, is it on is it on is this thing recording this is your girl T. S. Madison coming to you loud live and always and Fae of a in color from the outlaw spot cats with me T. S. Madison this week Laverne Cox is back Super style. That is what you are. Laverne, I love you. We're talking about her new book her controversial X and going off on the red carpet 20 minutes later. He's like, let's squash this a sucker. I was like, no, you do not talk to me like that. That is unacceptable I want to ask that you need to break up and can you ever really change a man? Listen to outlaw for T. S. Madison on the I Heart Radio app Apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts Like what's happened to that hat? I think that's what it looked like. It didn't look much better. Very much more vertical. Maybe I might have sat on it There's a good chance I sat on. Oh, I believe you might have laid on it. Did it go in the water? That didn't go in the drink. I don't think Which I'm very surprised about. He left it on the front of the boat all night long So we just we just went to Catalina. We buried the headlines. Yes, we did. We did we did it guys Listeners. We did it. We went to Catalina. We did it. Hey, we a lot of people send me DMs because I posted a few photos It it left the group chat. It left the group chat. Right, right, right, you know, we were talking about it We actually went and did a thing. Yeah, I think that's the problem. Oh God. I got it Is that what people say it left the group chat when it happens? I think I think a lot of plans happen in text a lot of plans People are talking they want to do something and then oh, can't get away the kids the wife the oh The well, you know, I've got to weld the well, and I got to go welding I got to go carve a bear into a log. I have things I'm doing, you know, yeah a lot of a lot of stuff And we actually it left the group chat and we fucking loaded on to my boat. You guys drove here at the fucking ass crack Come on. You got down here. See we got our asses on the boat. We loaded a big Big beautiful cooler. Hello, I'm drawing an alcoholic beverages. Hello, and we fucking I just went Mom and got us to Catalina, dude. Yeah, the ship Adam divine. I'm so proud of you. You look good behind that wheel It was a beautiful crossing. Oh, what my god. Oh, is that what we call it a crossing? Yeah, you call it a crossing Oh, it was a double crossing for us Absolutely, man. Yeah, facts were stabbed. It was it was a perfect outing and my only thing is I wish we could have stayed longer I just want to be there. I my soul is still there with you guys. It happened too quick. Yeah, it happened too It happened so quick that like We were back at 1030 back on my dog the next morning Yeah, and we were sort of like why are we here? Yeah, well, we did it. This sort of kicked us out. We kind of did it. Yeah, yeah, and they did ask us to leave They did Brighten early. The mayor was like you can go No, you guys are done here. Well, we you know little play by play we we got there. We parked the boat We then Drank. I want to say for two hours pretty aggressively. Well, Adam. How long does it take to get there as the locals say? The locals say and it's true. It's absolutely true. Very true. And it's wildly how true it is It takes two beers and you're cracking your third. It's science and that's how long it takes to get to Catalina precisely a two a tea that's exactly what was happened. It's exactly what happened and it's what happens every time Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, that's crazy. So we had a gotten there having two and a half beers by 930 930. Yeah, baby 930 a little later 10. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We respectable. What is 10 10 Yeah, little after 10. Yeah, and yeah, so we're feeling good and then we just Drink until about one very aggressively. We put a 10 in that cooler Swimming and what was that first drink we had called Buffalo milk And then we went on the island and we had some buffalo milks and wait Did we just drink on the boat before we even went to the bar Yeah, do remember we were swimming we were two hours we swimming we did backflips We dove off the roof of the boat. Oh, yeah, we're having a good old time. That was for two hours I thought that was like well, we're here. Let's just jump. We're at we jumped and we've done that Bro time was flying. I really when you look back at it when you get out of the chat We probably had another five drinks. Yeah, both four we then so we're sitting at Six seven drinks. You're right. It was those ice teas because you were selling up those ice Oh, yeah, I'm starting to really love iced tea with a little little alcohol in it. Yeah, little iced tea with a lemon with a little lemonade in it It was a who's in it. Oh mama. Me most those hit those hit different when it's the dog days and stuff when we're in the dog days and with So we're sitting at seven drinks. Then we went to the to the island and That's what we started drinking some buffalo meals big big boy drinks none other than buffalo, man Oh, yeah, can we talk about the bartender there? Please for just The rest of the hour. I wish we got his name. I'm glad we don't because I want to go fall in on this guy Well, he might be there again when we go back to hey murderer to murderer This guy's a murderer So uh this guy was like check the trunk strange yeah, what did he keep doing? We're drinking our buffalo mouth and what did he keep he kept asking if we wanted to meet layered Oh, that's right. He kept asking very off like regular questions in an off-putting tone With strong eye contact and then a smile and a head knife I think it's something, I want to say something was lost in translation because you're right. It was very like, I'm not sure if I'm getting the joke here or if he's projecting. No, dude. He was speaking perfect English. I think he's from the US. Catalina. I don't think he's, I think he maybe was Asian, but he very much is definitely Hispanic, definitely. I wasn't, it was not Asian, I don't remember this guy at all that well. That's fine. I was locked in. He was making strong eye contact. I was, I was sipping on those buffalo notes. I think he saw three guys come in that were clearly artists, and I think, I think he was cup checking us. I think he was like, what cup checking meaning you want to fuck or, yeah, I think he was, because he was saying, he was saying like sex jokes and being like, ha, ha, ha, but I think he was like, fishing. Oh, you think I think he was trying to pull in a blue fin tuna here. Oh, really? He saw a 200 pound blue fin come in and thought, well, we put the real in the water. That's cool. Well, because you can't, you truly by looking at the three of us, you can't tell for straight or not. So he was definitely, well, that's, dude, that's why I'm into carving bears and the logs. And on Catalina. Yeah. And when you're on Catalina, anything goes, anything goes. Yeah. And what happens on Catalina and he knows that that's why he says it half like, I'm joking. Like he asked to pop Blake's cherry a couple of times about like a drink. That's right. He was like, yeah, there's a drink. There's a cherry. And let me know if you want me to pop it, pop it, cherry, I'll pop it. Yeah. That's really easy asking if I want to cherry my drink. I don't know, but nothing happens. And Blake was in, Blake was in good spirits, too, because Blake, I love when Blake is just absolutely excited about everything. Like, dude, my child would wonder, yes, his child like wonder, would we're ordering unreal. The place is called Luah Larry's. It's like a Polynesian themed restaurant. It's awesome. Yeah. But we ordered a sausage pizza. Oh, yeah. It's 12 wings and it came right and by the way, just real quick, huge menu. A lot of different things that you could try if you wanted to like see food type stuff you could order. Adam, he had a handker in, yeah, made the order. Just saying, I made, I made the wings order. Blake made the sausage pizza order pizza pizza. I don't think so. I think you said wings and sausage pizza. No, no, I didn't. No, I didn't. Oh, then then Blake said sausage pizza to you and I didn't hear that part. Yes. I was busy talking, being like, is this gonna murder and then Blake kept saying like, now this is an order and it's and it was the most basic. I would even, wings were good. I would even venture to say not awesome meal. Yeah. Maybe the rest of the meal was great. No, wings were, wings were good. I like the way. Yeah. The sausage pizza is always a dice, but here's what I'll say. I think that Buffalo wings and sausage pizza. That's one of the best one to combos you can get in the game. Classic world. Well, that's, that is right. That's right. And I was going Buffalo wings, Buffalo milk. You're about to get your cherry popped. I was going, if we're going Buffalo, we're going all in. Oh, yeah. And we already were sipping on its milk. Yeah. We were fully Buffaloed out. That's great. I didn't realize that. I didn't do that. Yeah. So Buffalo milk is a signature iconic creamy cocktail of Catalina island featuring vodka, coffee, lacour, cream, de, caco, and cream, de, banana. This is the way. So good. No actual ice cream. Buffalo milk, sir, no wonder he's like, you want your cherry popped? And we're like, he's wild. Yeah. We were straight up. So we had, we had wiki wakers and that's where Blake or Blake got the wiki wacker and you can either get a hat or like a keychain or something. Yeah. Well, you got to have that hat. You got to get the hat. You got to get the wiki wacked. So then when you're walking the island and you see somebody with the straw hat, you're like, they've been, they're fully wiki wacked. Yeah. They're good wiki wacked. They got their cherry popped. They got their cherry popped by home boy. They're walking funny. There's track. There's a tracking device in it. Oh, shit. And we had three drinks there, three like knocks on the ball, mixed drinks. And then we went to the Blue Marlin. Oh, yeah. And then we had it maybe, they probably two to three drinks, then we went back to the bottle. Empty. By the way. Yes. Empty. Just us. And then we went back to the boat and then we drank for another two to three hours and did more swimming. Went swimming. We touched the bottom. I think I exploded a nodule in my fucking brain. Something happened. Is it still bothering you? Something right. Something definitely ain't right. I was learning about saltwater, dude. You can't handle the pressure, huh? Oh, man. When I went down-- Do you not pop your ears? When you go down, you got to pop them. Dude, I just saw you guys do it and, you know, I've had enough buffalo milks where I'm just like, I got to go touch the bottom of this damn thing. I just dove in. So how deep would you say it was, Drs? The pressure? 20 feet? More than 20. The pressure was bad at the bottom. Yeah. Because it took a minute to get down. Yeah. I just remember, I was like, I'm going to go to the bottom and I just exhaled like I'm in a pool. And I think saltwater you're more buoyant, which I guess I just never really thought about. And I did let out all my air to sink down, didn't sink at all, and had no air to blow the ears out, either. So I came back up and I was like, okay. And then just fucking went down. I think I had to pop three or four times before we got to the bottom. Oh, really? Poppin' cherries, baby. And I would say every 10 feet is--every like seven or 10 feet is a pop. I think I'm just a one--it's a one pop stop. Really? One pop. I think I one popped. I did zero pop. And then when I got on the boat all the-- Yeah, zero pop. Saltwater started to just like pour out of my nose, like my something happened to my brain. That was crazy. I've been on stage before at the Irvine Improv where I had been in the ocean early like right before going to the show. I just came back quickly showered, went to the show. And I just am talking and I like whip my head and just saltwater closes the front row. Watertouch. And you're like, what are you doing? Babies. Then you have to like kind of back explain like-- I'm not a co-cat. I'm not. Well also is that--even if you are a co-cat, water doesn't shoot out of your face. It's brain leakage. Does it? Plasma. I don't know. I haven't dabbled hard enough. That's fun to have. Yeah. Zycam, your hook thumbs, Zycam, is that the nasal spray? Yeah, Jude, I don't know. All I know is that the next day when I was doing laundry and I bent over, it happened again. And water just started to go, "Grrr." Oh yeah. I just-- That's bad. I think it hits in your sinus, or something. That's got to be what it is. Oh yeah. I mean, I've had it happen where I've been in the ocean and then I'm making love with my wife. And it just hoses her. Tell me more. Yeah. It's disgusting. She's pretty grossed out by that. Yeah. Yeah. You're like, "Bonnie, I'm so wet." That's not supposed to be a thing that happens. The part that's supposed to be, "Oh, you're fucking my brains out." My brain is-- There it is. It was pouring down. There's the fucking-- There's the in the common room punch up. I am fucking my brains out. I think you're liquefied by my-- Well, you're literally-- You're liquefied by my brain. You're fucking my brains out. Oh man. That's the next "Blumhouse" movie right there. Holy shit, we found it. We found it. And then we went back out. I had a nice steak dinner. Well, we dressed up. We put our real shorts on. Dude, the time goes by so fast, like that swimming felt like five minutes to me. Adamant felt like you were fucking like tick-tock, man. Everything we were doing, we got to go. We got to go. I'm like, "Dude, let's chill." Just, or else-- But no, you were right. Because then the day was over. Or else it's over. It is. And you just didn't-- You didn't bounce it out or anything. And we hardly did anything at all. We didn't know that. No, no, no. We mostly-- We didn't know that. We mostly. We mostly, like-- Emma was like, "So what'd you do?" I was like, "We kind of just drank." And she was like, "But what'd you do all day?" And I was like, "We just drank." We just drank. Like, we started early, like starting on the way there and then cracking a few afterwards. It was too late to be like, "Let's just go for a hike or snorkel." Like, it's over. Yeah, it's over. There was no time. There was no time. Next time. Adam, you were absolutely right. But I think it requires at least two days out there just to kind of get, because we always hit the ground running everywhere we go. Day one, we come out hard. Blessing in the curse. Yeah. Yeah, it really is. The second day I felt we would have been a little more adventurous and maybe gone around. No. No. No, dude. I was not more adventurous after that day of drinking. It has to be the first time. I felt pretty good. I felt pretty good. You're in alcoholic. You're way better at it. I'm built for it. I'm drinking than I am right now. But also, no, you didn't feel pretty good. I felt pretty darn good, man. You didn't look good. I have photos of you. Your face didn't look good. It's not about lunch. It didn't look like it was ready to go hike. [BLANK_AUDIO] guys who look the worst feel the best about them. So all right, sure, fair enough. I've read that I felt pretty darn good. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Fair enough. I did go by like two back to back like foot long sandwiches before I went home because I just had to find a soak it up a little bit but from where? Wait. Little pickle. Of course. The greatest sandwich establishment in Orange County. When you're leaving Costa Mesa, the Costa Mesa area, you've got to swing by little pickle. Shout out. Yeah. No, the complete psycho establishment. That was our college sandwich shop and it's really an awesome, actually, the band. Yeah. I went and got Keynes, like a goddamn novice. Yeah, but also Keynes. This is also a pretty good idea. And that's right when you leave the area and you're like, oh, there's a Keynes right there. Is it brand new? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's like four months old. Little babies. I almost did a bang bang because there's a Chick-fil-A, like a block away. And I was like, ooh, ooh, let me do a swing for you. Oh, yeah. The bitch. You can't. Oh, no. It wasn't Sunday. That's what else was fucking me up. We went on like the Thursday. Yeah. And then we landed back Friday and I'm like, oh, it's not the weekend yet. We still got emails to fucking. Yeah. That the bummer was getting back early enough Friday that like anyone expected you to do anything. Yeah. It's real people were like, hey, can you hop on a call? And I was like, ooh, a call. Yeah, yeah. You have on a Zoom. Can we make it a call? Can we make it a text or an email? I'm still at Lou out there. Wait a second. So we go back. This by the way, to me, this is also part of it. We go back and we end up just going back to essentially the same places. We don't even try other bars really. We went to a restaurant, put our name in and then went back to Lou out areas or back to the Marla. No. Then we went back to what it was called J.R.'s J.T.'s bars. It's a another bar we went to another band only lasted like 30, 30 minutes. Right. We had a drink, maybe two. And then we went back to the restaurant. We went back to the restaurant. And after the restaurant, we went back to the Marla. And do the restaurant blur restaurant was a blur restaurant. Yeah. It was a little foggy. Well, I'm the only one that ordered food. I was like, wait a minute. It's a steak restaurant. It's called Steve's steakhouse. And I ordered a steak and a baked potato. And these guys looked at me like I was a psychopath. They're like, you're eating. You're eating. And I'm like a sausage pizza, dude. That was like four hours or that was hours earlier. Dude, time is different in Catalina. It always like, it's like a blur. It's crazy. It's like a fever dream. For us. Well, it was like four hours earlier and then for you guys. And then so I was like, guys, we got to load up. We still have a few hours of drinking left. And then we have to wake up. And so I ordered a steak and baked potato. They looked at me like I was a lunatic. They ordered the craziest. I stand by my order. I stand by mine too. Dears had a while. Dears ordered potato skin and a cup of chowder. That was a weird and a cup of chowder and Blake just ordered what shrimp. Coconut shrimp. Coconut shrimp. And a wedge salad. Thank you very much. And that was a great order. I killed it the whole time. Dude, that is a psycho drinking order. That doesn't. There's no base. When you're drinking, you got to have a base. I guess the fried shrimp do something, but a salad is wild. Oh, hello. Coconut shrimp might be the best base you can have. That's like Jimmy Buffett ran on that shit, dude. I'm more clipy. Coconut shrimp is absolutely. They were good. I had one and it was good. Thank you. Thank you. I know what I'm doing. By the way, I think I had one too. So that means Blake only had two shrimp free, maybe. Hey, but you know what you didn't have. I actually think it was a pile of them. It was like six. No, no, no. There was a line. I think it was like an hors d'oeuvre style for like a table. It wasn't a pile. They were individually. Yeah, there was like five or six. But you know what I did have? You know what I did have that you guys didn't have that you guys talked shit about earlier. Was that the blue Marlin? I had a hot dog. Thank you very much. I had a like a 10 p.m. hot dog that you guys didn't even know existed, okay? Okay. Like Blake sort of spun into the blue Marlin like a top. We walked into the blue Marlin and he was like, I'm back and just sort of spun his way to the bar. Remember me boys? Yes. I just remember you like popping up with with shots like here you go and the boat doors and I were like, oh, I like got up on a piano and I'm like, he's just done. Done. Done. Let's go boys. Who's it? Randy Quaid. Randy Quaid Independence Day. Do you know anything from the musical sweet charity? I hope so. I don't know what that means. I know but sure don't. Give me that walkie cup. Theater. Theater. Honey, is it on? Is it on? Madison coming to you loud live and always and fail the in color from the outlaw spot. Cats with me, T.S. Madison. This week Laverne Cox is back. Gato superstar. Yes. Laverne, I love you. We're talking about her new book, her controversial X and going off on the red carpet. 20 minutes later, she was like, let's squash this and talk about it like, no. You do not talk to me like that. That is unacceptable. I bought that and said you need to break up. And can you ever really change a man? Listen to outlaw for T.S. Madison on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. I am talking to a felon right now with face tattoos and I cannot decide if I like him or not. That was a caller from my podcast, Therapy Gecko, where I speak with anonymous callers about their problems, relationships and anything else in the depths of their mind. It all happens on my show, Therapy Gecko, where we have real conversations just like this. This week is Human Connection Week. We're taking a peek into the lives of various strangers who found my phone number online. We'll hear their funny moments, their difficult ones and their unexpectedly profound ones. These are real conversations with real people figuring out life one call at a time. Listen to Therapy Gecko on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Well, it's that time again. Backpacks, first day of school outfits and the low key anxiety of, it might be doing this right. Good mom's bad choices is diving into the back to school season. The way only we know how unfiltered, funny and full of the moments other shows won't touch from surviving morning drop-offs to the guilt of missing the first bake sale. I already told me the sheet next season she wants to join a club team that's by your house. So I was like, so you want me to pick you up from school. I'll take you by my house, but then I have to take it over there and then I have to drive back and then some days I'm here and I have to go pick you up at school and then bring you back. I was just like, hell no. This is a space where moms trade their highlight reel for the real reel, whether you're a new mom, a veteran mom, or just trying to make it to pick up on time. This season of Good Mom's bad choices is for you. Listen to Good Mom's bad choices from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. I'm Jake Brennan, and on my podcast, Hollywood Land, I revisit some of the biggest stories from Hollywood history, separating the myths people want to believe from the reality underneath them. The story of Marilyn Monroe isn't just the story of the Hollywood icon. Marilyn Monroe has become so iconic that her death can only be explained through conspiracy theories, and for some fans who can't let go, these stories have metastasized from conjecture to accepted fact. So on August 4th, 1962, Marilyn Monroe died, then the rumors started, and she died again. And now, we're going to set the record straight, and learn about the way Marilyn Monroe actually died in the third way. Learn more about what happens when fame, media obsession, and conspiracy collide. Listen to Hollywood Land on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Yeah, so then Blake was just in the mix, now the part is packed, Blake's in the mix, he's bringing a shots back, Jerson and I are both a little on our heels, they're like, yeah. And then we, we drank there for, I don't know, an hour or two, felt like minutes. And then I'm like, we got to go, we got to go back to the boat. There it goes, Adam's ticking clock, and gotta make it back. And by the way, was I right? Because how hard was it to get a ride back to the boat? You were right. It was, it was tragically hard, because there's a pickup on one side of the dock and a drop off on the other. And we're standing on the drop off side for 20 minutes, and we're like, where's the goddamn pickup? Everyone's getting picked up on the other side, maybe 15 feet away from you. - Yes, we're still-- - We also skipped the beat. We went shopping boys. - That's right. - That's right. - That's right. - That is right. Right after was it, it was after the Blue Marlin. - Yeah. - It was when we were leaving and they were literally-- - After dinner. - Right. - Yeah. - Before the Blue Marlin. - After dinner. After dinner. - After dinner. - We made it back to the boat with these after going to the Blue Marlin. - That's right. - Well, because in my mind, I knew I wanted to get some sort of Catalina swag. I was thinking I was gonna come out of there with like a magnet or something. But then when I saw those Catalina Hawaiian shirts, I'm like, oh, me and my boys need that. - And this is the right call. - So good. - And if I remember correctly, you bought both Durs and I, a shirt. - This is sick. - This is sick. - Which the AMX was a max baby. - Yeah. - I was letting that baby fly. - And by the way, shout out, is that Tommy Bahamas? The one I got was a Tommy Bahamas. - Ars, aren't, Ars. - Adam read the tag, it's something called like Go. I had never heard it, but-- - It's a really good shirt. - Yeah, they-- - It's a really good shirt. - They, they, what does it say? Like go barefoot or some shit? - All right, there's no way we're ever gonna-- - Go. - Slide and Blake's DMs and tell him what that says. - Barefoot, go barefoot. It's called go barefoot. So shout out to go barefoot. - Go barefoot is what you said. - Yeah. - And I didn't get that one. I think Blake, you got it in a different color. - Yeah, I got a beige one. - And by the way, this shirt, for those audio listeners, you're missing out. Because this is a beautiful-- - Oh, beautiful. - It looks great on you. - Oh, beautiful. And look at that, you got the Catalina Casino right there. You got the Catalina flyer taking people. - You got the beach. - Yeah, the beach there. - Oh, great. - Yeah, it was just a base. - Yeah. - It was a great ad trip. Then we make it back, we finally make it back to the boat. By the way, we didn't even take the actual like water taxi back to the boat. - Oh, yeah. - We like begged a girl that just had her boat. - Yes, the coolest, like Catalina local. Just like with what do you call this? - Is this the rooper? - The rooper. - And different than the rooper. - Oh, yeah, they were like tying up the boat. - Blake saw two girls pull up on a boat and just tied a boat up and he goes, whoa. That's unbelievable. - Oh, yeah. - Blake was like, was it tied in the good spirit, he was like, wow, look at that, not. How did you do that? Wow, that's incredible. Wow, man, it was like these girls were magical. And they just tied the boat up. I mean, they did it proficiently, but-- - Extremely, they had such swagger. I'm like, I'm over here in my fucking Hawaiian shirt looking like I just ate fuckin' fork open a shrimp, like a bitch. I was singing show tunes in the bar and then I come up and I see these. - He just swallowed a glizzy hole. - I just garbled a glizzy. Dude, just pop my cherry hole. - Yeah. - It's cherry, they popped earlier. - They pulled up. - They gobbled a glizzy. - Blake, when you blip, this one maybe seals, dude. - It was insane, the authority. - And essentially they were like, can we get a ride? They laughed in our face and then they sort of recognized us. And even then, they were like, all right, we'll take you back to the boat, which was very kind, but it wasn't a welcome embrace. It was like-- - No, it was kinda like we do. - If we don't take them-- - I do recognize. - They might die, they might die. - It's like the code of the sea, right? It's just the code of the sea. If you're on a boat and you see somebody who's radars off or-- - So this is my thing we picked up on. Is that boat people love to tell other boat people how they're fucking up. - Yeah, that's right. - We had our, what are the little bumpers on the side called? - The Fenders. - We had the Fenders down as we left, because Adam was excited. Okay, this is not about Adam not knowing how to be a Boatsman. - I know. - He was excited, he was hosting, we're out of the chat, but as we're pulling out of the harbor or whatever we're calling that. - Harbor, yep. - These guys are like, "Your Fenders are down!" And we're like, "All right, we put our Fenders up." Then we get to the next harbor, the Marina at the island, and these little guys, this little boat shoots past our boat. - The dingy. - Yeah, after we're tied up on the mooring too. - And we go, "Hey, how's it going?" And he just goes, "Your radar's on, kept going." - And I'm like, "What's the fucking vibe here?" - That's a bitch. - Yeah, not even a, "Hey, what's up, man?" - Yeah. - Or a, "Hey, it's going well, what a beautiful day." - It wasn't that at all. He just had to punk me, dude. Your radar is on. - Yeah, uncalled, uncalled. - And the radar was on. I did turn the radar off. - After he mentioned it, I did remember hearing a noise, I'm like, "Oh, that's just what boats sound like." They just kind of, "He likes having his radar on." You know, but by this point, I was six strings deep. I'd been there for 15 minutes. We'd got there and absolutely guzzled two to three drinks. - Yep. - So just, so there's two sides of the coin. One is they like to tell each other what to do. The other side of the coin is, if you see somebody in duress. - You see something says. - Code of the seas, you gotta help him. You gotta give him a ride. - And you gotta help him. - You gotta give these alcoholics a ride to the boat. - Yeah, so she got us back to the boat. Here's where I was ready to downshift. - Yeah. - Because we have to take water taxis back and forth to the pier to the boats. - Yes, that's right. - Just to paint the picture. - Right. - So now we're back on the boat. We've made it back to the vessel. - Safe. - We're alive. - I'm ready to downshift. I'm ready to have one, maybe two, maybe two, and then segue into going to sleep. - Mm. - Blake was not on that page at all. - And then a lamb, and then a lamb, and then a lamb. - Durs and I probably had two, maybe three drinks, 'cause Blake had to open some. We're like, you know what, it's just us. - Yeah. - It's just us. - We break out a joint I got from Lowell Smokes years ago in a little glass case. - Yeah, I was sick. - Durs brought out the fucking ancient mummy weed. - Yeah, which was nice, that hit pretty good. - But you guys don't really, oh, it hit for me. That's what happens to me. When I smoke weed at night, I get, it's like a fucking monster energy drink. That makes me go. So you're downshading. - Oh, that's what happened to. Durs started me up, baby. - We were ready, we were ready like, all right, we're gonna smoke a little weed. We'll have a beer. - So down the bow, look at that. - Yeah, couple beers, chill. With my boys, Catalina. Blake was like, drink probably seven drinks on the boat. And then it gets up from we're smoking the joint to walk back to grab another drink. And we just hear a splosh. - Just absolutely eat shit over the side of the boat. - Somebody help me. - I go right into lifeguard mode. - You did. - I was actually proud of how you responded. - I get up, I go to the side. - Are you okay? - I just see Blake go, I'm like, you good? - Somebody help me. - Are you okay? - Yeah, I'm fine. - Completely, completely. Not on purpose, completely not making a bit out of it. Just fucking went over the rail, headfirst into the drink, man overboard. - How, yeah, with my, with my back on. - His purse. - All in. - All in. - Thank God I was the one playing music 'cause my phone would have been absolutely fucked. - But, I went in and out. - And fans were fine now in water. - No, not that amount of water. - That I was, that was a big dunk, dude. That was a big, that was an ultimate dunk. - But as soon as I hit the water, I was like, oh, fucking. - That's so breathing right up. - I popped immediately up and I was like, okay, I'm fine, I'm fine. I told you guys that. And as soon as I looked up, I did see you guys. - Yeah, well I think that was the first words you said, which you know someone's really fucked up when they fall, and immediately they say, I'm fine. - No. - You're like, no. - No, that was purely because I knew you guys would be absolutely worried sick. And you were gonna come in that's and I didn't want anybody to make a big deal about it. - Yeah, that's it. - Worse case scenario, you fall off the boat in a way where you hit your head and you're out, it's pitch black, it's nighttime. And you just start going down. - Right. - Which I guess is not how it works. Like people probably float. - Yeah. - Or you just start taking on water. And now two pretty drunk dudes are in charge of that? - It could be in a five alarm. - TMZ baby. - Well, I think that's how Jennifer Coolidge died in White Lotus. - Oh, it's poiler alert. - Jennifer Coolidge's character. - Character. - Died in White Lotus. - Died in a long time. - And by hitting her head and falling out of a yacht. And it was hilarious. - Is this in the latest season? - Oh, you got two in. - Which, I mean, I can't recall. - No, the season before. The season two, I believe, the Italy one. - Yeah. - I don't remember that. - You gotta finish it. - It's up. - Yeah. - You gotta watch it. - About five years old now. - Yeah. - I don't watch it. - Pretty good. Blake, are you coming at me for not having finished? - I just wish you would kind of keep up. - Keep up. - Yeah, I wish you'd stay on the goddamn boat. - I told you to. - And then Blake got back to the boat and it was. - And then it was all. - And then I have a very funny video where like, I have a very funny video that I'll send you guys that is, I think it's kind of me punking you a little bit for being drunk and falling off the boat, but I'm also very drunk. Like, I'm slurred my word. - It's always kind of like, yeah. I'm like, ooh, Blake. - You look so dumb as you're just filming yourself. - And then Blake was like, I was just diving in. I was just gonna try to go to the bottom. And then I'm like, well, then go to the bottom, bitch. - Dare you. and then you were like, "I dare you to go to the bottom." And then it was just a dare off of us going to the bottom. Just slurring our words. - And we never did. - Man, we didn't. We didn't go back. - And then it was that time. (laughing) - No, it wasn't, like, we were like, "All right, I think," and you just, we just hear, like, go, "Cook crack." - Yeah. - You know, comedy shouldn't be about it. And then you talked for 10 or 15 minutes about comedy and politics. - Yeah. - I feel like I just didn't want it to end, guys. I don't get a lot of trips like that with my bro's, man. - You're not wrong, you're not wrong. - You guys are telling me it's bedtime, and I'm like, I just simply do not want this to ever end because it was so beautiful. - Here's what I'll say, though, the balance is you call it. By the way, it was only 10.30 when we got back to the boat. And I guess we stayed up around midnight. - Yeah. - But if we had called it at 10.30, maybe we would have woke up around eight, gone back on the island for some breakfast. - Yeah, you know. - Kick the tires, could have kept going, but instead we kept going so late or at least so deep into the cooler, that the next morning we were like, let's see, Durg's awful bagels and hit the road. - It was a bagel. - Yeah, but then look, we go in for breakfast, we start firing it up again. We have to return home. It's a Friday now, I can't drive back home from Orange County. Like it just is a slippery slope at that point. - Well, that's when you just say, we're running to back, we're spending another night in Catalina. - Oh, I would love to. - Honey, I'm so sorry. - Two choppy. - We're two choppy. - They said it's two choppy. - You got it, check the report. The wind picked up. - The choppy is hell. - It wouldn't be safe to make the crossing. - It wouldn't be safe for me. - You know what I do love? I do love that it's like, you know what, I'll conquer. - It's just, it's two choppy. Why guys? It's two choppy. Blake couldn't stop drinking. (laughing) - We need an alibi. - Here is an alibi. - He's back on the island. - I told her it was choppy, guys. Let's get after it. - We couldn't stop Blake. He might be at the bottom of the ocean. - We've lost him to Catalina. - And then we crash. Durs took one for the team and slept on the bed that's outside. - So nice. That's gotta be lovely. - It worked for me. - It's a comfortable setup, I think. It's a comfortable setup. - Adam, I'm gonna say this, it's at six three. It's a different experience. - Yeah, I'm sure. - I'm sure. - You know, and like I hate to sound like this guy, but like things aren't built for people our size. - Yeah. - Big, you know. - Big guys. - And that's one of the many reasons I love not being six three. - Yeah. - It's just easier down here. - I mean, 'cause I had to like curl like legs up to the side, you know. But it was cool. I liked sleeping outside, brought the sleeping bag, yeah. - Yeah, you took one for the team, sleep mask even. - Which was nice. - That one boy. - Look at you, little one came with Diva. - I love it. - And then we were up by, you know, 7 a.m. Ready, ready to take on the day. And that's essentially when the guy came around and was like, "Hey, are you guys gonna leave sometime soon?" And Durs was like, "I don't know." And he goes, "I just kind of heard this from down below." I was like getting something in my bag. And he's like, "I don't know." Oh, I might have been on the toilet. And then he goes. - For me. - And then he goes, it's time to leave, essentially, right? - Yeah, I go. I'm not sure when we're leaving. He goes, "Well, you got to leave by 9/3, I go." Then we'll be leaving at 9/30. - Yeah. - We'll be leaving. I'm glad we got to the bottom of that, sir. - Yeah. - He was asking nicely, but then he quickly told us. We're out of there. - Then he was like, "Fucking radars on, bitch." - Yeah, get your ass out of here. - So then I was on the toilet. And admittedly, I can't blame Anders for taking a shit. I can't blame him because-- - Too many nature. - You shit? - Because you're not really supposed to shit on boats, my size. - Oh, he talked to you. - You gotta lay that out at the beginning of the two. - You have a bathroom. - You try not to shit. Yeah, you try not to shit on the boat. - Sure. - And it's the same as boats and tour buses. You try not to shit on it because it can clog and it's gonna be a thing. But everyone's well, you gotta shit on it. And that morning, the grumble in my tummy, it had a shit on it. So I did a bit of a coblamo in the bathroom and then I flushed it and it went down and I was like, "Whoo." That was close. Thank God. Thank God. That what a nightmare you would be. - I saw you fall to your knees and I saw you fall on your hands together and I saw you mediums. - To the gods of Catalina. - And then I hear the church bells. - Thank you, Lord. - Thank you. - Yeah. - Another successful shit. - And then I washed my hands, came out and I'm like, "What did that guy say?" "What did the harbor patrol say?" They told me and I'm like, "Oh, fuck. "Well, let me do it. "We gotta get going." And then Durswin and then he took a shit and we're back. - We're back. - It didn't flush that time. It did not flush that time. And the water, we kept trying to get it to flush so the water kept rising and rising and rising until it's at the very lip. And then we're traveling home. It's just just brown sewage water and it's just bouncing around. - I'm living in a nightmare. - And by the way, I try to do, this is the move. This is also when you're in a trailer filming or whatever, where you time the drop with the foot. So you stomp on the opening for the drop. When the drop happens, you take your foot off so it just goes straight down. - Yes, right. - But when I opened it-- - You timed it wrong. - The water I think was just right there. And so when I closed it, it just like chopped it up. That's a chop. And I look in and I go, that's a chop. - You lumberjack the fuck out of that, bro. - I did. I was like a fucking Milwaukee bus. - You said, you said where, where, where, where? Bro, I thought it was a lumberjack competition. - I was doing it for time. - You in there and there was just little discs of shit. So it looks like a pile of poker chips in here. What the fuck happened, brother? God, damn. God, damn. (upbeat music) - Honey, is it on? Is it on? Madison, coming to you loud live and always and forever in color from the outlaw spot, kids with me, T.S. Madison. - This week, Laverne Cox is back. - Kero superstar. - Yes. - That is what you are. (laughing) - Laverne, I love you. - We're talking about her new book, her controversial X, and going off on the red carpet. - 20 minutes later, she was like, let's watch this a song about it. I watch that and it's like, you need to break up. - And can you ever really change a man? Madison on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. - Sometimes I'll have my girlfriend pre-tune spicy food and kind of baby bird it into my mouth. Is that weird? - This week is Human Connection Week. We'll hear their funny moments, their difficult ones, and their unexpectedly profound ones. Listen to Therapy Gecko on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. - Well, it's that time again. Backpacks, first day of school outfits, and the low key anxiety of, it might be doing this right. - Good mom's bad choices is diving into the back to school season the way only we know how. Unfiltered, funny, and full of the moments, other shows won't touch from surviving morning drop-offs to the guilt of missing the first bake sale. - I already told me the sheet next season she wants to join a club team that's by your house. - I'll take you by my house, but then I have to take you there and then I have to drive back. And then some days I'm here and I have to go pick you up at school and then bring you back. This season of Good Mom's Bad Choices is this for you. Listen to Good Mom's Bad Choices from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. - I'm Jake Brennan, and on my podcast, Hollywood Land, I revisit some of the biggest stories from Hollywood history, separating the myths people want to believe from the reality underneath them. Like how the story of Marilyn Monroe isn't just the story of a Hollywood icon. Marilyn Monroe has become so iconic that her death can only be explained through conspiracy theories. And for some fans who can't let go, these stories have metastasized from conjecture to accept. it fact. So on August 4th, 1962, Marilyn Monroe died. Then the rumors started, and she died again. And now, we're going to set the record straight and learn about the way Marilyn Monroe actually died in the third way. Listen to Hollywoodland on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. It comes out and he's like, uh, it's not going down. Which is something you never wanted. You don't want to, you don't want to hear that. Tell somebody? No, you don't want to report that. You don't want to hear it. I didn't want to say it. Yeah, that's big of you. We couldn't get it down. No. And then we have to make the crossing. So we go back. I got to go. The fucking dudes breathing down our neck. Get the fuck out. We unload off the boat. It was a great time. Bye guys. You guys went and got your fast food. I was like, what's going on with this boat? I admittedly, I took a two hour nap as soon as you guys left. I'm like, I'm going to take an app. I took an app. I drove for two hours. Go ahead. Yeah. Sound traffic. Yeah. You guys had to drive. I had the better end of the stick there. But then I go back to the boat. And it's so foul. Oh, dear. And I'm end up using a plunger. And I'm so now I'm just mashing it up. And the plunger head gets stuck all the way down. And it was not coming out. And I'm like trying to like wiggle it free. And I I'm like, wiggling with the plunger. And it comes out. And just the stick comes out. And as it does spray of the shit. That's ocean spray flies up into my face all over my shirt. That is ocean spray. Jesus. That's a will be red ocean spray. I'm living in a nightmare. I'm covered in in shit water in your in your friends in your friendship water. And I'm covered in it. I go, I wash off. I come back with a new plan. I'm going to take a garbage bag. I'm put my arm in it. And I'm going to fish out the plunger. Then I'm going to stick my hand down in which are so the plunger piece is still in the plunger. It didn't just stick. Yeah. Yeah. It's just it's just in the hole. The bottom. Yeah, it's just like stuff. And it's it's converse. It's like upside down style. Like those toys you get that you put on the table that then like jump up 30 seconds. Yeah. Yeah. That's right. That's exactly if it jumped up at you, bro. Hey, stores not done. I take the the arm, the arm that I have in the garbage bag. So that's your right arm. You call your right arm the arm. This is what happens when the store is not done. If you guys just how to use English, you have your left arm and then you have the arm which is your right arm. The arm that I have, which is this one. And I fish in the toilet and I go to pull it out. It then pops back and sprays so much shit everywhere, dude. And the worst part. Are you wearing? Are you innovating suit? Are you barefoot? I am in a barefoot barefoot shirtless. I'm covered skin on the due to spray on flesh covered. Great to skin. And the worst part I was chewing gum. Oh, I was chewing gum. The mouth was open. Who's that arm spray? No, no, stop, stop, stop, stop. Spray my mouth. Spray in the mouth. I don't know why I was chewing gum. I just was. I was not, I was not thinking that that could happen again. That is so foul, dude. And then maybe the most foul part. To see if it's going to move you. At that at that point, I just took the boat hose and just sort of rinse my body off to try to get it off. You should have lit yourself on first. The first time I went in, I like took a shot. And then I came back out. I'm like, that's not going to happen again. And then that happened as I took a shot. And then now I have to reach my arm in there. The arm. And I think the seal might be busted. I don't know what's happening. We're sealed. And like I am poking on where I think the seal is and I don't really know how it works. And it's open. It's fully open. Now I've turned the water off so it's in the bowl, isn't filling. And I'm fingering something, but it's kind of giving a little bit. And then I realize, that's how it works. It's a rock hard shit. And it's stuck in the, the, the hole where it actually should shoot down and the suction takes hold. And it shoots through the hose. So that's been there, that's been in there for a while. That's been there. Well, then no, no, no, no, no, because that was the blockage. No, because here's the thing. That's what I'm saying. He brought it out. He broke it open and there's buffalo milk. It must have been a wiki wacker. My bad. That's an owl fella. I have to finger this, I have to finger this hard shit. Oh God. And, and I finally stick my finger through. And then the suction take hold and the whole bowl goes. And I have to suck my arm out with the toilet bag. I wish it took the garbage bag out. And your arm was just in it to win it. Wow, dude. I'm sorry. You had to, but that's a captain's way. Yeah. That's I had to do it in captain's way. And you gotta go down with the ship. Yeah. Absolutely. And boy, did you? I did, uh, I boy, did I feel fucking manly? Oh, did I feel manly when I fixed the toilet? Oh, yeah. I guess that's and Adam the book end you just did. Yeah. This is a Dave ship hell 45 minute story that you're kind of like this is getting boring. It's gross. I'm laughing. But where's it going? And then we'll plop you head up with the I'm feeling fucking manly. I tell you what, I was like afterwards. I was like, I gotta buy some fucking tools. Yeah, dude. Yeah. Some tools would have helped like a new plunger or a snake. Like I could figure shit out dude. You should have just got a snake. I should have got a snake. But you know, plumbing, chop back, they call the my right hand, the human snake. They call the the arm. Yeah. Now we call it the snake, baby. The next time I clogged the toilet, I'm going to have you come over with the snake. The snake is right here. It's good for you figuring that out. Nothing feels better than fixing your own problem. You didn't have to call anybody to do it for you. You rolled your sleeves up. You literally dipped your arm. You know what I should what I shouldn't have showed my parents. It's blue for a month. Yeah, go ahead. I shouldn't have showed them chat GPT specific in my dad. I've shown him chat GPT. So now any question I have for him. I'm like, uh, you know, walking through the backyard. I'm like, what are you doing? I'm like, this fuck like this shit. It's so clogged. The the brown sewage water now, because I've like tried to the plunger. I've tried to like smash it. It's just sewage water with like clumps in it. It's the grossest thing possible. Cumin by yeah. At least if it's like dirty water. There's like a whole potato skin. Yeah, I didn't poop on the boat though. There's just tails of a coconut shrimp. I never floated. I did not poop on the boat. This is like a sign fell to ending where I reach in and I pull this out. And it's just the fucking tail of the shrimp. It wasn't me. Is that a coconut shrimp? You just happened to see me. Wasn't me, man. And so your dad, you're asking him for like pointers on what to do. I'm like, yeah, do you know, because he's had boats, but they've never had boats with a a toilet in it. So I don't really know. And I'm like, yeah, it's sort of like it's like an RV. It's like having an RV or a tour bus. And I'm like, man, I don't, I don't really know what to do. And he then just gets on chat GPT and just starts reading me what chat GPT would do. And I'm like, I don't. This is all like bad advice. Burn the boat. Yeah. And my mom is, my mom is, is now on the internet. And she's like, there's chemicals you could pour. And I'm like, I don't want necessarily to pour a bunch of bleach down these tubes. And then that like crows it. Compromise it or compromises the roads or corrodes or whatever the word is. I don't want it to road anything. Just so one. I'm just listening to you guys fucking ball out here, Webster. Oh, I want to road shit. All right. I ain't trying to road shit. Yeah. So we, I fixed the problem on it. And boy, did I feel manly. It felt, it felt good to actually, uh, to fix. I love that. I've done, I've done some on low level plumbing in my home. And it, it does feel good to unblock. Like what? You did the, like, where you feed the thing down that's got like the hooks and you just pull all that hair out. Oh, yeah. I have to do that almost every week for my shower with this hair. Oh god. Creature. That's a creature report right there. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That happens to my, my wife's hair. My wife has the thickest, nicest head of hair, but I guess she sheds. I guess it's a shedding situation. Yeah. That's all women humans. I shed a ton of hair. It's a lot. I shed a ton. It's a lot. Dude, maybe I've talked about this on the pod, but when I was a very young kid and like just didn't know how the world worked, I would look, I'd be using the toilet. Like our family had the bathroom, whatever. Nice. And we know you use toilets, bro. We know. Every once in a while, I would go in the bathroom and look in the toilet and there'd be like a clump of hair just on the surface of the water. And I'd be like, what the fuck? What happened? My mom was just in here like, is her like fucking a shield? Okay. Yubes like falling off. Yeah, I was like, is there Gucci like shedding? Is this like an adult thing that someday I'll learn about? You're going to learn about when you get old enough. Someone's going to tell you like, "Hey, just so you know, Gucci's shit." Right, yeah. Then maybe years later, I'm in the bathroom and she's brushing her hair. And I see who's going to clean the brush, boom to the brush, pulling off all the hair that came off. And then she just drops into the toilet. And I was like, "Oh." So your pussy's not gonna. (laughs) The whole time. Unlocked and answered like five years of me being like, "And one thing that happens, you can reaper." If you could rewind time, I would tell your mom, throw that in the trash. - Throw it in the trash. Throw it in the trash. - Don't risk hair in the, in the tubes like that. - Uh-uh. No, no. - This is actually not anything in the tubes. This is actually good advice from your boys that this is important. - Why don't you tell her, Blake, dude, honestly, don't even shit in your home toilet. Don't even shit in your friend's boat. - Yeah. - Just go shit in the garbage can. Just go shit in a plastic bag, in your front yard, like a dog. Like a dog, shit in the front yard. Pick it up with a plastic bag, like a dog. - And then throw it away. - Do a kitty litter box. - Sorry. I'm trying to establish, is this advice for me or is it like people listening is this general? Like I should just do it. - I mean, just do it real quick. - Just do it real quick. - I get where Adam's coming from. You're not allowed to shit in any more bowls, dude. This dude is traumatized. - Hey, can I tell you something? I know you felt manly for like fixing the problem. I'd venture to say I feel a little bit more manly for causing the problem. (laughing) - I don't give a fuck! - That was pretty manly, dude. I will say, shitting on your friend's boat was pretty manly. - Because when you clog a toilet for the first time, you're like, oh my god, but part of you also was like, yeah, it was that big. - Yeah, I did that. - I guess it did clog it. - Well, I will say, you can't feel that great about it because it's a boat toilet and technically it's, I mean, I've felt in my knees praying to God. That is what it is. - There's not a vessel alive that could handle my growlers. - Well, Ders, you ate three whole potatoes when you put all the skins together. It was two potatoes, four potato skins. Which like, you know, you dig out a potato skin to like put in like the fucking chives or whatever the cheese and all that. - The fakes and stuff. - The food in the fakes and zero scoop. Just sliced in half and topped. Don't love that. - That's how they do it. That's how they do it in Catalina. - All right, Steve. Get your act together with the potato skins. Any take backs or apologies, any epic slams? - I do apologize for taking the final shit in a crescendo of events that caused it. - Yes. - No one to make? - Yes. - It doesn't feel like a real apology. (laughing) - You were the straw that broke the camel's back and he does apologize. - That doesn't feel like a real apology. - I feel like the, 'cause you did leave before the cleaning crew could have addressed. - The cleaning crew is not gonna do plumbing work and you can finger your shit out of my toilet. - No, no, but. - Yeah, that's not. - Parts out of an extra ex. - Like fossilized, hard ones. - No, no, no. Here's what I, okay. I don't think maybe I didn't explain it well enough. Here's what I think happened. You had a hard nugget of a shit. It got stuck there. Then you had more softer shits. And when you went to cut it off and you cut it off and now there's shit that's floating in the bowl that I saw, there was already a one that was stuck in the hole. And it didn't quite make it through. - And you don't think that's yours. - Then we went to flush it and your other shits. It got sucked down and then got stuck. And now it's all packing on top of the one shit that now it's made it hard. And I had to finger through it. - I took one log. - I saw it. - But the chopper, the door that opens. - The door, yeah. - As I kept doing this. - It chopped it. - Yeah. - Chopped it up. - There's a mystery third in there. - And we should have a doctor on, I know we had a guest on last week and we didn't even mention this, but we should have a doctor on who can explain that like the tip of your poop is more dense than like the end. Which could make sense if it's compacting up against that the butthole door. - That wall. - Yeah, so that's what I think what happened. But, okay, I'll take the apology, the sort of apology, I'll take it. I would like to apologize for listeners to saying, the chink kink, I think I said, in my armor. - Don't make it worse. - Yeah, I think, you know. - Yeah. - You don't know what to say when it comes to, I think it is a kink in the armor. Is it a chink in the armor? - Yeah. - What is the friend that is the chink? - That is what it is. - Yeah, that is the chink. - Okay. - And why is that, why would that be offensive? If that is the actual term. - It is now a word that is used as derogatory, but it's a totally different meaning. - It is, but it's like, we've decided to just throw it out as a whole. - I do think, and for that I apologize, you know. - There's a different, there's a word that sounds crazily like the N word that a professor used. It's like N word, and then like a DLY, right? I'm not even gonna say it, 'cause the professor got fired for using that word, 'cause they were like, what did you just say? It's like a DLY, what is it? I don't even know what that means. N word, and then DLY. - Sure, sure. - Say it in your head. - Yeah, got you. - Uh-huh. - Okay. - So that's your apology. - Derly, derly, derly. - Okay. - N word, derly. And he said that word, which means something else, and people were like, what'd you just say? - Well, what the hell does that mean? - I don't know. - I'm sure that's still very racist. - This is like a chicken the armor is a, but that is a phrase that you say. - This is a professor, he knows words. - This guy's digging in the crates for words that sound like super racist terms. - And as we say it now, as we say it now, do we think that he does this on purpose? - Yeah, he was, he was fishing. He was fishing. - Yeah, yeah. - And do we think you did the on purpose? - I was just saying something that I will say is exactly what I meant to say. It's like the hole in my game, or I guess would be another in my man game. - There he goes. - Yeah. - Here we go. - We found it. - We found it. - My hole in my man is just adjacent idioms. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I'm always saying this. - The hole in my man game, let's bring that to the table. I mean, I don't really have any apologies. I had one of the best times in my life with you guys. - And you take back the apologies or hole in your games? - I guess the one hole in our game is that we only stayed for one night. I think I could stay a whole damn week with you guys. That was a blast. - That was so fun. - Dude, we gotta pace ourselves. And I don't know if we know how to, but it's gotta be like, you'd think in our forties we'd figure it out, but we got shot out of a can. - We gotta like have a plan where someone's meeting us to take us snorkeling. - We had a plan too. - We gotta be accountable to somebody who's grown up or something. - Yeah, that's true. - Said the 45 year old man. - Hey, no, you know what we have to do is and I've never done it because the only way I know how to get there is two beers and you're cracking your third. - Sure. - I feel like I would get lost. - I would get lost and see if I didn't have the two beers cracking my third. - Right. - So, but I think that is the trick to not drinking as much and as fast as we did. - It's not drinking those. - It's not start at 8/30 or 9 a.m. - Yeah, of course. - Come on. Come on. - Yeah, man. - Hey, you're right. - Come on. - It's not gonna happen. - What that I think would end itself to us go scuba diving or some shit. - I love the idea of it. How do we do that? I mean, 'cause you had the breakfast burritos. So I'm like, oh, we could have breakfast, but we did that. And the only thing to chase those down. - Yeah. - It's a cold snack. - It's a Montenegro cold snack. - Woo! - That's right. - I love it. - Big shout out to Danny McBride for coming on the pod last week. - Yeah. - Big shout out. - If that's how the order of these are going? - Yeah, I think it is. - Yeah. Danny McBride are, I mean, and it's a proper, we did a podcast with a guest for the whole episode. - Yeah, yeah. - My God. - I think it went fairly well. I can't wait for everybody here. - I, you know, this episode, that episode isn't out yet and this one is still a week after that, but I bet we broke the internet. - I hope so. - I bet the internet just fucking quivered with us finally interviewing a celebrity guest in a real way. - Fuck it. The internet busted, God. - I hope we break it. - I hope there's still internet around. - Oh, yeah. - Same. - For this podcast to air. - Yeah. - I don't even know if you will world the record as a big fan of the internet. - Doom. - And slide in Blake's DMs if you think we should have more guests and give us suggestions of guests because if you guys like it, we had a good time. - Yeah. - We had a great time. - We hung with our boy, Danny McBride. - How great is Danny, by the way. - All right. - Come on. - That's probably the longest you guys have sat and talked with them, right? - Yeah. - I think so. - Isn't he just the fucking man? He's funny. He's way smarter than us in a great way. - Bro-book. - Bro-book. - Bro-book. - Bro-book. - He really did. The book. - Yeah. - It's a good idea. - Brilliant tales of modern men. He wrote a whole ass book. And by the way, that is it. cool thing. If you're a person who was thinking about coming on our podcasts, I know there's a lot of podcasts out there where you're like, well, I don't know. I don't want to see how I come across. You're going to come across so smart. Yeah. Great. We're going to come across so great. Leaving here, you're going to go, I guess I'm not a fucking idiot actor. Yeah. For a dumbass musician. We will uplift you. Oh, yeah. You're going to feel like a god damn genius after coming on our podcast or like a borderline psychopath president. If you come on this podcast, you're going to leave feeling like, oh, maybe I can write some laws. I don't know. Our next. Our next guest is Donald Trump. Is that what your picture? All right. That'd be a thing. Yeah. That'd be a fucking hell of a swing. Number two. I'm going to come. I want to know about Stormy playing that the entire come. All we talk about is Stormy Daniels. He's like, all right. All right. Okay. I knew you. Maybe we should wrap it up. I knew you guys were going to talk about all right. And you didn't want to talk about anything else. Nope. Okay. That's the Stormster. Storminator. Storm. Stormster. All right. Well, okay. That was another episode. This is it on. Is it on? This is your girl. T.S. Madison coming to you loud live. And always and forever in color from the outlaw spot. Cats with me, T.S. Madison. 20 minutes later, it's like, let's squash this. Let's talk about it. It's like, no, you do not talk to me like that. I want to ask like, we used to break up. Madison on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. That was a caller from my podcast, Therapy Gecko, where I speak with anonymous callers about their problems, relationships, and anything else in the depths of their mind. Listen to Therapy Gecko on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Why do some women yearn for Shakira's black hair to make a comeback? I'm Maria Garcia. You may remember me from my podcast Anything for Selena or my Divo. And now I'm back to unpack more stories from the present and the past. Listen to Muy excited with Maria Garcia on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. New school year, same beautiful mess. Mom life is calling my last mother fucking volleyball tournament of IRIS club team volleyball and I cannot wait for it to be over because I don't like participating and having to drive for our distances. Shout out to the moms and my mom made it happen. Listen to Good Mom's bad choices from the black effect podcast network on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an I Heart Podcast. Guaranteed human.