Ep. 262 - They Turned Ludwig Chinese

(upbeat music) - This might be the most drinks and items of food per capita we've had in the beginning of any episode. - Yeah, more. - So I got one. - How about that? - One, two, you got another drink over there? - Welcome to the survivalist bunker episode. - I wonder how long we can last in the yard set. - I think in honor of all the drinks in the food, I was thinking we could commemorate by doing 10 minutes of phone time. Start this episode. - Really? - Look at him as one. - 10 minutes straight. - No, I like that. - 10 minutes of phone time. - Yeah, and we're all just sometimes, one of us goes, "Who wants to try?" - How about you explain how I got delivered to us? - Aiden, did you hear it? - It's 10 minutes of phone time right now. - Oh my god. (laughing) - I like phone time 'cause it's a low-key bagel time during phone time. - Dude, you would use 10 minutes of phone time so bad. - Yeah. - You got the most boring work, it's work right now. - It's work right now. - I'm thinking about deleting Archie's out. They're doing that thing where they post scores from games. - It's fine if it's phone time, but don't bring up what's on the phone. - Okay. - You can't tell me what you're looking at. - Phone time means you're locked in on the phone. - Okay, so let me lock in. - Unless Lacey comes out as bisexual. - If Lacey comes out as biopin' on the news. - Well that's news. - We need to know that. - That's breaking news. - We need to know that Archie's out. - We also told us first and we're kinda waiting for the announcement 'cause we've been ready to support him publicly. - Dude, I did a mogul money yesterday and we had a power failure. Power went down and part of the warehouse. So we're trying to get it fixed. I'm playing with a bunch of screen-agers, dude. (laughing) - Yes, you, yes, the way you're eating a bagel. - He's really eating it. - You know what, and I'm actually gonna say this 'cause slime loves to do this. I'm as late as fuck, and Aiden called a sharp in wasn't here. - Oh, hey, but. - It's just me and Nick locking it in. - And then they show up in one's housing a bagel. - Is it a housing bagel? - Important detail, I feel like we can brush over though. - Yeah. - It wasn't razor sharp. - It was just sharp. - It was just sharp. - But we reset. You're forgetting the great reset. - Oh God, this is awesome, guys. Hey man. - And he's still for a time. - He's so locked in. - He's in a beat, so. - Aiden, it's been 10 minutes. - Oh, great. - Yeah, well actually we have 10 minutes left in the pot. - Dude, you have flies by when you're talking to Lane and Discord, dude. - So, I had a bunch of screenagres. It was Wardrobe, Jobar, KDB. Power goes out. They all get on their phones. Bro, Wardrobe gets on his phone, starts laughing hysterically. Like, I've never seen, did you just litter in the yard? - It's funny if you just keep going. - Hesterically laughing. Like, but so much so that KD gets off her phone just to look at him on his phone time, 'cause his phone time's so much better. And then she looks at me and I go, "My phone time's never like that." - No. - "My phone never does that." - Wardrobe has a J.B. And KD has a J.T. - Yeah. - It's that simple. - I think most of us have J.T.'s. - Yeah, mine's a J.T. for sure. - I think if you think it's a J.B. You don't realize how much of a J.T. it is. - It's interesting, 'cause I'm from four years ago, did think it was a J.B. - Mine Pokemon transformed into a J.T. - It has changed. - It started like, you know, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, and it has pressed B. - The phone used in Archie's sensor, sensor this. If you guys have seen the viral meme around, right, phone time is maybe bad. - I think you can say that. - Yes, I can. - Let's not even try it. - Technically, you can say it. - Technically, but I wouldn't want to see it. - He could believe it in a way that makes it sound worse. (laughing) - Oh my God. - Just believe the first part of that. - Saying that, saying that right now, and keep it in the app. - If you just give right way to make it a J.T. (laughing) - 'Cause I, okay, so. - That's what ladies are going to look like. - Okay. - I just do not put it in the app. - If you sensor the first two letters, it'd be horrible. - Yes. - You were my lives in your hands. - I was on my J.B., right? And I'm scrolling. Well, it's on my J.T. at the time. And I'm scrolling. I get one of those memes. The second post right after it, another one. The third post, another one. In a row, three in a row. - Yeah. - And I'm like, my algorithm is back. And my girlfriend's like, why do you go on that fucking website if that's all you see? And I was like, you don't understand. This is what the internet was. - Three animal posts in a row? - Yes. - Like I'm back. - Yes, bro. - So the J.T. has turned into a temporary J.B. - Sometimes it does hit what? - What's that? - I stand with Hank Green. - Oh. - I think I mildly stand with Hank Green. I think it's a generational or a loss. But I think him going in like the LLM. - Do you see both sides? - The dopamine cycle. The dopamine cycle is just too much for me. - I'm glad I have the fence on my ass and right in yours. - I'm more willing to criticize him. - You are just saying you kind of have his side. - Yeah. - And then brought up both points. - Yeah. Yeah, 'cause I'm not gonna give him a pass on something if someone else did. I would call him lame too. - I like Hank Green. - It was very quickly distorted, I feel. Like what happened? - I read his own words and I was like, "What happened?" (laughing) - You miss? - I miss. - I miss. - He tried to drink an entire peanut butter liquid death at a local hospital and he started shitting and finally diarying. - No. - He got a bad one? - He was on a make-a-wish. - Oh. - Like tripping out. He was for a kid with the science. - In front of the kid, he's gotten his mouth. - So what happened is he ends up in a hospital bed. - Yeah. - Mr. Beast now comes to Hank Green as his make-a-wit. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - He's right. - Hank Green got to make-a-wit. - Yeah, Hank Green says, "Oh my God, Mr. Beast." - Who is the poop sealant in his mouth? - In his mouth? - No, they closed it out like at the dentist. - Yeah, a little bit came out of the mouth after. Who holds it out of the mouth? - As a dentist, they just do the water pick and he gets a-- - It's a pressure wash. - And now we're, okay, this makes it, we're making a fine stand, okay. - We're making fun of Hank Green. - He doesn't, 'cause slime sees, well, that was a lot of-- - Be getting pooped in his mouth. - Yeah, yeah, that's a lot of poop in his mouth and I think it's okay for a man to have pooped in his mouth. - Except separate from that, there was a second thing that also happened, right? It was like, "Yeah, I think." - This strikes me as the main thing. - No, it was the main thing, yeah, I don't even know. - I was just about to mix it up. - Yeah, he was saying he used LLMs to find research papers, to then read and then interpret himself and then make his videos, which is like totally fine. I think I read his sort of self-legulating explanation and how the LLMs give him such a dopamine cycle that he's like, "I really gotta take a step back." And I thought that was kind of stupid. I thought it was kind of stupid. - 'Cause you wasn't like, stand on business with it? - I don't even know about standing on business. This is like, I don't know. I guess I didn't think about it too deeply, but my initial thought was like, blaming something on like, "Oh, the Chatchee PT just gives me so much of a release." It's like, "Yeah, I mean, it gave a lot of those guys that ended up killing their girlfriends." What a release too, 'cause it would validate their thoughts and it's like, you know, you think, people in their 40s love fucking AI, they fucking love it. I don't know why. - Yeah, I mean, I think it's the guy who, the guy who really popularized it, Sam, big Sam, you know? When he was, he was like, "You know, I just had an idea." This just gave me an idea. I should ruin the world, you know? Like, what if the next thing I did was-- - Yeah, I hate it with like a definition of the entire world. - It's not a definition, it's news. - It happened in the news. - I know. - There was a trial. - Sam Holman comes with a yar bit like this. - I don't think there was a trial, but-- - Yeah, I don't know, that's fine. - I don't think-- - I don't know, you were a friend? - Anything that's technology in the building starts to fucking-- it fizzles out, like, that's happening. - I do think his use of it is like fine. I don't care. I think that's very normal and actually sets up a guardrail like that he determined and I think it's a very fair one. But I think his response to it was just like, a classic blunder. - Wait, am I crazy? - He's basically just saying that he uses, like, uses it like Google search and then follows the links that he reads in papers himself. - Yeah, I do it fine. - I also do that. - I think the, like, part of the criticism was that he had a script that sounded like AI. - Yeah. - Oh, so is like the misrepresented argument that he's writing his scripts with AI? - Yeah, I think that was like the takeaway. - Yeah, 'cause he had said that I appreciate the pushback in a way that seemed out of context and then people interpreted that as he accidentally read AI saying that to him as part of a script that he was saying to other people. - Oh, 'cause yeah, the model will be like, you're so right for correcting me here. - Thank you. - Thank you for correcting me. - Thank you for placing your nuts on my tongue and teaching me the real way. - Would you like to see my breasts? - No, breast time. (laughing) - It's what they're calling for. - Gen Z's trying to cancel Hank Green. - Yeah, I think he lives this one easy. - It's saying is, Gen Z doesn't know, you can live a lot of these. - This one's, I think it's tough because of how muddy people are trying to make it online and because he's an educator. - Yeah, there's not much nuance. It's more like Hank Green, I think what I have seen. Sucks off Sam Altman directly, loves using AI, has fired all script writers in lieu of AI. - Right. - And also supports the Israeli apartheid. - Yeah. I've seen all of this - Oh. - Wow, Aiden's getting called out. - Aiden, what's the legal call out? 30 second time out? - Aiden, it's his first walk into Zipper's Domain from an episode ever. - Did he read it? - His first last week. What is happening? Why are we all going through Zipper's Domain to leave the art? - Zipper's Domain, it lures you in. - Is he demanding more of us? - Perhaps. - Wow. - It must be important if Ben is pausing the art. It's a bit of a portal, we're saves, we're saves, and he's back. - What, so what was so important that it needed to? - Sorry. - This is your job, sorry, it's one of your nine jobs that you take to the home. - Well, it take care of each other. - My time's in high demand. - Now I have to drink the diarrhea water. If you drink it, you'll end up like Hank. I warn you. - Yep, okay. - It's liquid death-- - It's a peanut butter. - It's a liquid death, which is water brand, but peanut butter-- - Aiden, if you don't want to, I really would like to try it. - We have like 70. - I want the one that was handed to him, 'cause I'm like a dog where I see food given to a human, and I'm like, that's my food now. - Dude, this, give it a try, give it a taste. - Oh, we didn't explain how it arrived at our home base. - Yeah, I will, I get messages sometimes, like by sometimes I mean, once every two years from someone who works for Mr. Beasts, and she's like, hey, are you around, Mr. Beasts has a gift, which always means like, there's some promo for an item. - Sure. - And like, in the past, like, like they've been like a little silly. - Oh my god, a red carpet comes out and a guy in a suit opens a briefcase, and it's like a feastable's bar. And I'm like, okay. And I think the idea is I'm supposed to film it. I never film it, I just experience it. - Do we still have the machine here? - How do we get a machine? - Yeah, we do. - Does that Venny Machine still have bars in it? - The Venny Machine? - I have no clue. - How did they do that? - So one of the things they gave us, a couple years ago now, was like four feastables Venny Machines, stalked. - Yeah. - But this Venny Machine sat in our warehouse, and our-- - Which doesn't have AC. - Which doesn't have AC. And over the course of the summer, turns into a here. It gets hotter in the warehouse than it is outside. And what this means is every day, the chocolate in the machine went through the cycle of melting within the plastic bar, but then, hardening overnight. So it's just this warped kind of art piece of re-melt, thousand re-melted chocolates. - It's like a Dolly painting. - Yeah, and it's beautiful, but they're not fit for human inside it. - The clock's on a tree. It's feastables bars melted across it to imply time as a malleable thing. - So anyway, today, I get to hit up, I'm like, all right, I'll be here at whatever, 11 o'clock, and then outside of here. (humming) And like, 10 dudes, hell's angel sour roll up in Harley David's shoppers, in the shoppers, and they're making ruckus. And I go outside, I'm like, we saw the ruckus, and then, and then, leader gets off the bike. He's big ass, fucking guy's got all leathers. And he turns around, Mr. B's decal on the back. Incidentally, I'm like, this is not scary anymore. 'Cause initially, it was kind of scary. - Yeah. - Then, do you see the Mr. B's decal? You're like, I'm in a Disney channel movie. - You draw a sharpie circle around those guys that they're ants, and they're like, (laughing) - There we go. - And it likes the flame. (laughing) - The guy comes up to me. He goes drink this, and it's this water. He just hands you one. - Yeah, and I go, - You're beta ass drinker. - And I try it, and I go, peanut butter. And he goes, (whistles) and then, and then, all the boys start listening up, and he goes, he's like, tastes like peanut butter, and they all start cheering. - This is a part I heard up here, far away. I heard cheering. - This is crazy. - And then, I wasn't here. (laughing) - Second and command comes up. There's Zoro, if you will. And he comes up, he's got a whole tray of peanut butter cups, gives me one, he goes eat it, and I eat one. And I, and I go, good. And then, they go, (whistles) he's so good, and they cheer again. And then, then they go to leave. And then they break for a moment, 'cause he's like, wait, you're supposed to give him the peanut butter box. And so the guy comes back to me, the peanut butter box, and he's like, you don't probably want to keep it in the sun. (laughing) And I was like, yeah, that makes sense. And then, he gets on his bike to leave. And my vest was right in front of him, so I go, if you want, I can join you sometime. And then he laughs, and he comes to give me a handshake. And then they leave. - Yeah, a lot of people came upstairs pretty much right after that, and said all that to me. I kind of just blankly stared at him. I'm like, what are you talking about? - Yeah, and I can say, with certainty, this is ass. - Yeah, it's fun. - I think it's a marketing gimmick. - Here's the thing, if I can describe to the listeners, but I think it tastes like, it's like, if you made a protein shake at home, you don't even make protein shake with water. - It's peanut butter. - Yeah. - What did you think it was? - I forgot, he was allergic to water peanut butter, 'cause it wasn't peanut butter form. It's peanut butter flavor. - Yeah, sure. - So he can't probably have it. - I tasted it. - Did you? - Why does he look like that? - I hope you choke. - Why is he covered in poop? - He does look covered in poop. - What the fuck? That's what happened to him! - That's what happened. - No! - That's what happened to Mr. Beast. - But Hank was the one spewing poop on the way. - He was trying to protect himself. - And please, no, no, not like this, okay. - So hungry. - He's flying everywhere. - I'm gonna murder your thirst, Jimmy. - I'm gonna claw. - Dude. - I'm gonna murder your, where's my poop? You're pooping your mouth, Jimmy. - If I can describe really quickly what I think it tastes like. You know when you make like a protein shake, like a peanut butter chocolate protein shake with water as the base, instead of milk. You do that, and then you feed it through a brittalfilter. And you drink with on the other side. - That's what I said. - And you germinate it. - Then you put it through a soda street. That is what that tastes like. - It tastes crazy. - Dude, what two things, one, it's peanut free. So you're good. - I'm in the clear. - And then two, they make this down the street. - What do you mean? - Oh, they make it. - They make this down the street. But if you find the liquid deaths, they found a fastering plant and you found out. - Look, I sure have found it. - Yeah, they make it down the street. - On our flush place, people found the studio and then drew a mogey flower on it. - I didn't do that. - I didn't do that. - They didn't do that. - Just don't come to the fucking warehouse, you're weird. - And I was like, guys, don't do that. - Yeah. - Please, you get it. - You wanna be a part of it. - You're not a part of it. - They put it in real fun. I got it in the house too. - They did. - Yeah, I zoomed into that. - No. - I didn't really know. - No, I was. - I was taking a while. I was that one. (laughing) - Every pixel is five minutes. - Guys. - Congrats, wait, let me do it. Congratulations is in order. I will now accept my congratulations. - What did he do? - What? - I'm a cramp. - I'm gonna say, oh, oh, I know it, I know it. I think I know it, so I'm gonna not say it, but I'm confident I know it. - Would you like to solve? - I guess I'd like to solve if they don't want to solve. - I would like to pass. - I'm passing. - It would like to solve. I'm passing. - Slime completed all jokers in Bilatro. - I got completion is plus plus in Bilatro. - I don't know, I don't know. - Well, you can please. - So. (clapping) - Oh, thank you so much, you guys. - For that organic authentic brand experience. - Could I ask what completion plus plus is? - So you beat the game, sorry. You get gold steak. Sorry. - You're nervous. - Yeah. - You're not usually like this. - It's weird to see it. - It's like a hundred of hours. - It's a lav mic, you don't need. - I do not need to see the end of it. - It's just on my shirt. - Yeah. - Do you know your hours played? - I'm sorry. - 368 hours on steam. Which isn't that? - No, it's not, it's weirdly small. - Am I crazy? That's like less than half of what I would've guessed. - Like a beatable game. - I would've guessed like 900. - Yes. - But yeah, basically you play every joker, you complete a gold steak run with every joker in the game. And it's really grindy. It's, you can also just re-roll to get like good runs. So it's like, I didn't really do that. But, you know, I did it honorably. I was working on it for a while, it took a while. And when I did it, I felt, I was like walking around like the man all day. - I felt the man, I'm the man. - It was crazy. I didn't think I would feel that way. It was awesome. - Did it say on steam? I always check right now. Did it say on steam like what percentage of players complete this? - 0.8, which is actually kind of high. But it's just very grindy. It's not a very fun challenge, but I did it. - Is there a notable joker? - A notable joker? - A tough nut to crack. - It's the ones that show up. So my last joker was the stone joker. And he only shows up when you have a stone card in your deck and it's an uncommon. So you have to first get a stone card in your deck and then roll till you find him and then beat the game with him and he's not very good. So there's that and there's glass joker is the same kind of thing. I'll also invisible joker. That one's probably. - Of course. - That would be a scary Batman movie. - You get the invisible joker? - It was. - That was one of my last five. - I was going to bring up the other exciting news. 'Cause this was. - This was. - What kind of cover? I think we go with number one. - I think we covered it. - Nick is joining the 30 club. Nick is 30 now. - Yeah. - He is 30 now. - We grounded it out. - But you know what? You know what? Because I was afraid, right? It's like, oh, I find three and 30. I lose all my bargaining power and making fun of slime or whatever we're doing here. But then I realized that Aiden's now left out of something. - Yeah. - And now you are just, you're more the loser. Now that I'm 30, you're the loser. - I've been 30 for about a month. - It's like weird. - Okay, this is a good thought experiment. The three of us are pedophiles. Aiden is not a pedophile. If you're not a pedophile, you're kind of not in the club. You're going to get made fun of. - Yeah, yeah. Of course. - Yeah. - Right? - And that's what I was going to say. - So it's kind of like that. - My feelings are of not being the pedophile for once or clashing with feeling excluded. - Got one. - And continuing to be the human part of the club. - So we here at the yard wanted to let you guys know how amazing we have been sleeping lately. - And it's all due to Helix sleep mattresses. They're really good and they're really comfortable. I have one. I don't have sleep quiz. - 20 unique different mattresses. You just take the sleep quiz. You find out which one best suits you. - Yeah, there's sleep zones. You can customize your whole sleep. It's free shipping and seamless delivery in the U.S. And 120 night sleep trial. So it's a warranty. If you don't sleep well and 120 on not 20 nights. - Yeah, I took the quiz. And the first one I got I didn't like, but it was free shipping with the sleep trial. And I got another one and I love it. - I'm kind of worried about having to pay for like a delivery fee. - Yeah. - It's literally free delivery. It's free delivery if you everyone at the same time. Go to helixleap.com/theart for 20% off site wide. That's helixleap.com/theart for 20% off site wide. helixleap.com/theart. - And this is the position that I like to sit in when I'm on it. - For audio listeners, it's not gonna hit the same. You know, audio listeners, you might wanna go watch this one. - So what else happened? Nick turned 30. I did the one of the greatest gaming accomplishments of all time. I got one and done to get one on Street Fighter. - Yeah, I saw it. - It's still cooking right now. - But I know the prodigy. - I know the prodigy. - I saw it at this point. - No, if Noah has adapted at all, which the top players should do. - Yeah. - The correct answer is a no reply. - Yeah, 100%. He's walking into the lions. (laughing) - Loving white boy in the summer. - Yeah? - I think so. - Off the back of "Streamer You and Streamer Games" - You don't. - The two massively successful men. - You're a little disgusting renaissance. You've done it again. - Listen, you don't forget. - You don't have, what is that? - It's my Chinese symbol. - Oh my God. - Why sure? - Megal run. - Oh, it's interesting. - Why sure? - I like that. - That gif I see it every day. - Oh, in Chinese Ludwig, yeah. Gif is as big as "Streamer Games." - It's bigger. - It's funny, everyone's like calls it Chinese Ludwig, but like lore-wise, I'm specifically not Chinese. I'm from a made up empire that loves China and tries to like learn the culture. - I don't know. Louis, I've been walking around my house watching this video, laughing and saying, this is what I would do with a million dollars. - Yeah. - This is what I, this is what I would have done. - This is the Jack Maw movie. - When Jack Maw made his own Kung Fu movie and just hired a bunch of people to make it for fun 'cause he's a billionaire and he can do it. - This is what I respect him. - If we had a billion dollars, we would have made this. - Oh my god, they released my lore too. - What's your lore? - I'm from an all gay empire. - Really? - Yep, you're kidding. - No. - Come on. - Can you pull up the clip zipper? I believe it's on Mekhan's Twitter. - 'Cause it can to continue. This is just what we would have done. - Yeah, Fooling is an all gay. - Don't joke with me. - I'm not. - Tell us a minute. - This is fucking important to me. - The empire of Fooling only allows gay men to fool in, fooling around, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Similar. - Yes. I was an envoy and I went to go see the Bisha herself. - The pause empire. - I was trying to think of the logistics of an all gay empire. It's hard. - Well, yeah, I guess it's a lot of immigration. - We're gonna need bday's. - Oh yeah. - And yuck. - And dude. - Only half of the population is allowed to grow. I'm not over that. - Dude. - All right, right here. - Mine was gross, sir. - I'm not bad. - Ludwig, I'm a YouTuber from America. - I play the Prince of Fooling, a made up kingdom that I rule with an iron fist. And I hope you enjoy it. Come finally. - They cut it. I thought it was in that clip. - You didn't even wash the clip. - No, I just saw the caption from Nikon. - You said it? - Oh yeah, it's in our vlog. - Yeah, I say pretty consistently. It's an all gay empire. There's a lot of takes that I didn't give them. And they were very adamant about getting the take they wanted. - How bad do they want Papa? Could you have done Neal Rutherford in that? - With the look. - I think I don't know what I've done. - No, no, they would've, 'cause then they would've been like, "Ah, okay, can you try it maybe?" And then they would've waited to get what they wanted. - What was the energy like there? Like, what was it like being on that set? - It was freezing cold. - Okay. - It was outdoors night. It was, that shot was outdoors. - February, that one was indoors, but like actual shoot was outside his February. It's cold as fuck. And it was like a crew of like 30, all Chinese people. - I was imagining you like talking head, doing an interview about this shoot. Like, saying this to me. Like, yeah, it's really cold, you know, but I was methoded. So everyone on set knew that if I got a little intense, that that's just how I had to be to get there. - Also him saying a crew of 30, all Chinese. (laughing) - Yeah, man. - Cross-faded, cross-faded shots on set. - Important because the script was in Chinese, and I wasn't doing it justice, and it was slowing the shoot down, and it was the last thing they were shooting that day, so everyone was trying to go home. - Is it still like, like white paper, core, your new? Like is it still all the same? - What do you mean? - Like on the script. - Do you have paper script? - The script. - In Chinese? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, but they wrote like the English phonetics of the words on big poster board beneath the camera. - Oh. - Famously forgiving language. You can kind of just figure it out. - Tony, you mostly eyeball it, it's an eyeball. - Here's a beautiful thing about the phonetic way to write it. They don't put the tone in. I don't know, I didn't know the tone. - The way how your shots are like towards camera, is 'cause you're reading off of a board. - Well, that's part of like the styles that you're supposed to look at the camera. - Yeah, the game is like a-- - The game makes you novel, but-- - But yeah, the only thing that sucked is that I didn't know Chinese. - Yeah, I mean-- - Did people there kind of expect that you would be better at speaking Chinese? - Or were they just frustrated in general that you'd sucked, but they knew you would suck? - I think they expected me to be better. - Yeah, okay. - I think they weren't prepared for someone who didn't know how to speak Chinese because the director at one point goes, can you stop reading and look at the camera 'cause you have to look at the camera? And I go, "Why do I need to read to see the line?" She's like, "Okay, well, can you, while reading, "look at the camera, that's just how it works." - That's hard. - You had to choose. - Like, am I crazy? Like, why would they expect that? You hadn't even gone on tip to tip yet. - No. - Well, I think it's 'cause the other on voice, I've all spoke pretty decent Chinese. - Well, they're on voice Chinese in the game. - No, no, no, no, no, I believe one or two might have been, but one was a Korean creator who wasn't kinda crazy, but also, they lucked out 'cause a couple also had a physical performance. You don't need Chinese there. - Well, that's what I'm gonna put you might think. - They're doing a fan dance. - I get to be pretty Chinese physical performance if you need me to think. And do we need a bidet for that? - Yeah. - You will at some point. - It depends on what you're gonna host now. - We're gonna host them now. - But anyway, it ended up with like a new strap forming where one of the guys would read the line and I would repeat the line. - Yeah. - So he'd be like. - Oh. - Hi, Renfong. - Dine Renfong and I would say that back. - Were you better at that? - Yeah, but unless the line got long. - When he gets long, it's tough. - And then I'd be like, "Duo Shao Chen Mach Yan Fong." And it really wasn't synced up. - Well, how did it turn out in the game? Is it indesernable from mainland Chinese discernable? - I love that. - It genuinely comes across, like they had hired a fluent Chinese speaker to do the role. - Wow, I'm glad I wore this shirt today. - Yeah. - No, it came indesernally like you look at it. Some of the lines are really good. - Yeah? - Really good. - Oh. - No, I'd actually turned out fine. - And you had to play the whole game on stream? - The only part that, yeah, I'm getting some shit in China. - No. - They're mad at me in China. - They're so fickle. - They're fickle. - I thought they liked each other emotionally intelligent love way. - Yeah, I can't believe they're mad at you, bro, 'cause you fucking performed your heart. - 'Cause they were so kind and reasonable to us. - They, you know what, sometimes it flips. Sometimes it flips and now I got what you guys got. Because I didn't like the, I only liked one of the love interests and there's two love interests. There's Lee Ty and Leager and I like Lee Ty. But he's not the historical route. He's not the canon route. I see. He's like this old universe, bad boy. - Wait, your character's gay then? Your character's gay then? - No, no, no, my character doesn't get to play. This is, you play the Empress. - Mm. - And so anyway, I like the Lee Ty route and I'm glazing it, but it's a fake, and it's not a real ending. It's a side plot, B plot. - Okay. - You can't beat the game with this route. - Why are they mad? - 'Cause then I played the main route 'cause I need to play that to unlock my scene. - You're talking about your playthrough, not your character. - Yeah, I am. - I am views back. - They're not just the playthrough. And so I play the main route, but I'm having it high. 'Cause the fucking side route with Lee Ty, it takes, I'm not shitting you six hours for one kiss. And you get one kiss and then it ends. Leager's second scene, you're having sex. - No way. - You're pregnant by scene three. - Wow. - You the player, you the Empress. - Okay, and I'm like, put the fuck is this? How the fuck does he get it? - You have 500,000 or back shots from Leager. (laughing) - So I'm having a heart. - Can you go to like Chinese Planned Parenthood? - With it. - Do they do abortions? - Well, yeah, I don't know. - That was a big plot. - China? - That was a big plot was that one of the other Dowagers tried to poison me with abortion medication. I think, and then she also gave me like earrings that would make me weak. - Ah, you'll hate when the Dowager gives you jewel, jewels like that. - Yes, they made me weak and it's so fertile. - Oh, but anyway, they got mad because I wasn't glazing Leisure enough. And they're like, he doesn't respect Leisure. - Wow. So they do do abortions in China. - They did in the Tang Dynasty, I don't know about now. - Presumably, yes. - Wow. - Yeah. - Is it good? - You don't do 'em here. - They don't fucking do 'em here. You're worried about damn child, we don't do 'em. - I would argue they were famously doing them for a few recent decades. - Right, it's the whole thing. - Yeah. - I forgot about that. - Highest for poor abortion rates globally. - Yeah, because of the - One child policy. - Yeah. - I can't even do it. - It's illegal. They got better abortion rights than us. - Oh, what can you do? - Dude, yesterday, I saw, it wasn't yesterday. One of the days I was driving back from here, you know, it was 7-Eleven. I saw a guy actually beating off a homeless guy. - Oh, like? - Have you ever seen that in real life? I've, it's the first time. I, it made me think I've never seen a man masturbating in real life ever until this moment. - Really? - Yeah. - You ever seen? - No. - I never catch 'em. And I try. - And Lord knows he does it in this office. - Dude, I was doing it. - I was doing it. - And then popping it open. - Wow, okay. - Damn it on your phone again. - I was doing a crazy place in the old house. At the old house? - Yeah. - Really? - Was it crazy? - No! - Under your room. - You jacked off in the washer. - Fire went off in there. - The laundry. - The Obamacus. - The one. - Me. - Obamacus. - And the laundry. - The one in front of the garage. - Huh? - In front of the garage? - Yeah. - In there. - Were you sitting on the dryer? Did you turn the dryer on? Did you sit on the dryer and turn the dryer on? - Yeah. - I said, I'm like, I got one hand here. I got one hand kind of here. - He wanted a quiver from the base. - What's that one doing? - Wow. - Is it balls or butt? - I'm playing with that one. - I'll tell you a little bit. - You're hanging his butt. - I've never done that. - That's advanced. - That's advanced goods. - I'll say this. This homeless guy was not doing that, but he's, he's-- - Some rolls are down. So, he left hand, and he could do it. - He was turned around and he's beating off into a bush, but he's on the sidewalk. It's very public, and I just see him kind of cranking it. And this guy next to me in my car, so he's in the other lane, and he goes like screams, like, "Hey!" And I thought he was screaming at me, and was so loud, was terrified. And I turned, and he's looking pretty much at me, but he's not, because he's looking at the guy beating off. I look, and that's when I notice him. - He's like, "What the fuck are you doing that?" "What the fuck are you doing?" He's like yelling at this guy, just beating off, and he does not care. - That's just gonna make this more exciting. - 'Cause that doesn't happen every day. - It was crazy. - That's crazy. - And then yeah, and I just drove with thinking about a bunch. - Zipper 3's been a Metro writer the past few months. - Metro! - She's been, and so she always has stories from what's going on in the Metro. And she said last week, she's on the escalator out of the station, and she is standing like above this guy. And she looks back, and the dude, it's just looking up at her, pants down, peeing up onto the escalator. - Oh, yeah. - So it's not racing her, because she has the high ground. But she's looking down at the managers look at her, piss and arc onto the escalator between them. As they go up, she's probably making the same face that she makes when like, she does his face. She does a lot, she's like, ew. (laughing) - But it'll be like a reminder stuff. - Yeah, it'll be over like a homeranian walking bar. - Yeah, yeah. - It's like an escalator. - And this is the same reaction. She hits the same beat for all of these things. - Yeah, up and escalator, that's creative. - I know, that's what I was thinking, 'cause it's bound to come back at you. - Also, I feel like that's an impressive control. I would be hard for me to start peeing, right? - I feel like I would finish escalator ride and have to go down, and then like-- - 'Cause of the P-Shine-S, or-- - Yeah, just like, I don't think the P would come out. So naturally, A in that position, like arcing, like pointing up, P pointing up a lot. - I gotta cite, you know, I, when I'm in a urinal, it takes a little while for me sometimes. It's brave, with that man did. - I would argue, it's brave. - On the escalator. - Yeah, I agree with you. - Dude, okay, streamer games. What's your favorite moment from streamer games? All go first. - My favorite moment, my favorite 18 team. - What's your favorite moment from streamer games? - Stentic brand experience moment. - All go first. - What was your favorite brand integrated moment at streamer games? - And then maybe your normal favorite. - Okay, I said I'll go first, is it through time I'll say it? So I'll go first. - Just go. - Hold on, is there a brand? - Oh, I saw a man get shot in the face. - Yeah. - Yeah, there was a man who were leaving the johi-sai-shi concert and he was shot through the face. - What are you talking about? - With a bullet. I don't know what's confusing, are you dumber-gas? - So he saw a guy die. - This is confusing. - No, okay. - He had been, you saw him get shot in the face. - I saw a man who was shot in the face. - In the past and has survived and is now at the concert. - Let me change it again. - I didn't see the man. - Okay. - I was walking with cutie, leaving the johi-sai-shi concert. - That actually makes it work. - Joe's 75. - It's my fourth time seeing him. I went with Michael and Lily, went great. Then we leave, Hollywood Bowl has like a uber pickup. Cutie goes, "Let's walk a little further "and uber further away." - I go, "Okay." - It is a mess. - She's right for that. - She's right for this. So we walk up this street, like a block away. And then I see this guy, and it's a little dark, and I'm zoned out, and to me, he's just screaming. But I'm not really listening. Well, I realized afterwards, when Cutie talks to me, he's screaming, "I got shot in the face." - Whoa. - And cutie looks at me, she goes, "That guy was shot "through the face." - I think so. - 'Cause she saw him, she's like, "There was blood "in a bullet like through, I think like the neck here." - Unreliable narrator. - It's possible, yeah. - Who's the unreliable narrator? - I think we know who I'm talking about being the unreliable narrator. - Cutie, why is cutie unreliable narrator? - I think she's an unreliable narrator. - Why? - I think like this, because I think, sometimes she sees horror ghosts in the walls. And then she'll say, "That man was shot in the face, "and maybe I don't believe it." - So, I don't believe her. - We get a notification on the citizen app that a man had been shot in the face. - Unbelievable. - Oh my God. - On the corner. - Unreliable narrator. - And part two. - Five police cars. - She has the app. - Come zooming by as we sit waiting for the uber. - He called them. - Shutting down the street, 'cause a man had been shot. - Shot in the face. - In the face? - In the face? - Really? - Damn. - Thanks for not sure yet. - Did we talk to the man? - No, no, no. - I just heard him scream. - I just heard this. Well, here's what happens when I hear a scream on the street is I move cutie to the opposite side. - Yeah. - And I put myself between the scream and her. And then I just focus on getting to where we're trying to go. - Yeah, so I focus on disarming? - I'm ready to disarm if I'm being attacked, but I'm not going to disarm someone who's just on the face carrying a gun. - I think a preemptive disarm is always in order. - You have to preemptively disarm. Otherwise, you put everyone else in a Patriot carrying a gun. - Then the Patriot themselves will know a counter disarmity of the Patriot, counter disarming technique. They will parry out. - The counter disarm technique is brrrrr, and they fucking lighten up. - Patriot knows a Patriot when they see a Patriot. - I did not. - So this was my, you wanna know my favorite moment? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - He'll be, he'll be comes up to be, and he's like, so he did the Alienware thing. - And I'm gonna use his real voice. I'm gonna use his someone to talk like how he talks. He did the Alienware thing, and I love it. - Talk like how he talks. The viewers are against you. - No, they're not, 'cause because Luis, do you remember Luis? - Yeah, I remember Luis. - He was your first 1v1, and Luis unfortunately failed, 'cause you rigged games to win and look cool and strong in front of people, but he did win a big monitor anyway. He goes, Kelby is the person that escorted Luis back to the stands. Luis actually posted on Reddit picture with Kelby. He's like, got a picture with Kelby. Loki, his voice, is like that, which is awesome. - That's Christmas too. - But something else happened. While Kelby was escorted in Luis, the loser/winner of the Alienware 1v1, someone in the crowd said, "That cocksucker, Kelby?" - No. - Oh my God. - No, it's no. - I'm in the break room downstairs in the week, 'cause I was compensating the love of the streaming games. America Pete was awesome. And I come down, he's like, "Fine, I'm not sure if I want "to tell you this, and then you told me this story." And he was laughing the whole time. - I would have kicked that person out. - He loves the attention. - Are we really good ignored that we put Kelby at the start of an episode in all the comments? All the comments are calling you a psychopath. - Right. - 'Cause he was on his best behavior. - You know what else is funny? He called himself cocksucker, Kelby in that clip, and then got called it by someone anonymously in the crowd. And then he tried to, he tried. - Cocksucker aside. - Not for me, bro. - And I'll put that aside. - And my empire. - That's like the prerequisite to get in. - Yeah, he's the hand of the king, isn't it? - I got no problem with that. - Yeah, he told me that, and he was like, - I just, I really have to respect the way that you say things and they stick. I can't deny that. - It's gonna know. - I actually think that's one of your best traits. - Yeah. - All right. - Is that you have a way of coining terms and phrases. - Best. It's dangerous. - Yeah, you do too. - There's an element of danger to it. - You think about the strength and longevity of all right, Matt. - It's literally just like Donald Trump. - It's not like that. - Oh, it might be a little bit like that. - It's the same power. - But does he, he doesn't have any lasting tics these days. He's kind of falling off. - No, it's cause he has, he's mine. - He's never wanted to be like anyone says China here. - Yeah. - He's worth trying to forever. - What do you mean that? - And brother, I was calling him Sleepy Joe. (laughing) - And I voted for him. - Well, he looked tired. - He didn't look tired. - I wonder which ones he makes up. Cause Meet Ball Ron. - He's too clever for him. - He has to have a team. - Yeah. - But at the same time, he's been famous presumably without a team. - Yeah, cause he just said lie in Ted. And I'm like, you know what? That makes sense. - He's just, he's just always been that guy. - But it was funny. On the subject of all right, man, I was, I was going through my old streams because when I got banned on Twitch, I thought they'd deleted them all, but they just unpublished them. So it was actually, they're still on there. - Saved. - Yeah, they're saved. And I go and I watched an old, old, cause I was trying to play every Sega Saturn game. I mean, like, 10-9. And I'm in it and I'm a terrible streamer at the time. I'm a better streamer now, maybe. But at the time, I like, don't talk to chat. Everything I say, I just like, I don't read out loud. It's very interesting. But I say, all right, man, once every 10 minutes, this is from 2020. - Yeah, we, we lived it. - Yeah. - Yeah. - It's almost like once every 10 minutes is a calm day. - Yeah. - I was looking at it like, wow, this really was the way it was. - You're a storm. - It was, you'd hear stops coming down the street. All right, all right. - It was genuinely like how they show Pokemon streaming. - Gimme, man. - You know, that stuck. Cause I have the cats at home now and I'm saying it all the time again. - How do you like being fucking back, dude? - I like being cat dead. - I kind of love it so far. However, there wasn't incident on the second night and maybe, and I started to feel like maybe two times as too many, maybe this is a reflection on me. Because the little kitty, we're trying to put them to bed and like put them back in the bathroom cause you're supposed to like, keep them in like a smaller space at the beginning, right? So he's scared. He doesn't really want to be picked up or moved. And they've both took a D warmer pill earlier in the day. - And Abiza. - Yeah. And when I'm trying to pull him out from under the couch, he sprints out of my hands and I smell something so bad. And I realized that he's left a little spot, a shit on the carpet, but it's like all liquid. And then I managed to catch him like a few minutes later and I realized. - I agree with you. And I science. - Is that Hank's poo? Is that peanut butter liquid death? - I started banging on the walls. I was like, "Hey, come out!" He just crawls out of your closet coughing. (laughing) - Hank, you're supposed to be the asshole of those kids. What are you doing here? - He spent $2,000 of the tokens in that bathroom. I used all the water in the county. - And when I pick up, when I pick up a little cat, he has his tail and his ass are just like caked in liquid poop now. Cause he's dragged everywhere. - That's what I call the drink. (laughing) - Liquid poop, he's supposed to like the poop. I would buy, I would buy liquid poop. (laughing) Like can I say that? - They sell liquid poop. - They sell the number. - I'm trying to look at poop, I fucking look at it. - They sell liquid death poop, but they sell liquid poop. - Kind of a deep call back to carbonated poop water. - Carbonated poop water is old. - It's an old one. - I pull him, I realize that he's not, you know, he's settling into the space. And already we have to give this guy a bath. Cause you can't, he's gonna be getting poop everywhere. And he's already scared. I don't wanna do this. So I go put on these like big thick leather gloves. So because he scratches and bites. Like when he's like really upset, right? And I take him into the bathroom. I have like a walking sort of shower. And I turn on, I'm holding him in one hand. And I turn on like the little handle with the other. And I'm gonna like start spraying him. And I'm trying to like wash his bottom. As soon as the water hits him, he freaks out. And he's biting and scratching me. And I try to pick him up. Like catch him on the way down. But I kind of like grab his like back legs. And that makes him freak out more. And he, he's hissing and spinning. And he jumps in the air. But as he jumps a stream of poop starch on his ass. And then he runs, he runs out of the shower. - He's a girl. - As long as I'm getting in my head. And because he's, and because little cat tub girl is running around the room looking for a place to escape to, but it's a fucking bathroom. There's nowhere to go. He's, he's leaving this trail up and down the wall of the bathroom, which is all white. And it's just tattered everywhere. And he eventually settles under the sink. And he's doing the thing where I've never seen a cat do this. Like you know, in an animated movie when a cat's really scared, they stand like they have all their feet in the same spot. And their back is arched in like, almost like they're like a heart shape. And all of his hair is standing on the end. And he's, he's like hissing and meowing really angry. He's making a sound that I've never heard him make before. And as he's doing, his ass is kind of like raised because of how arched his body is. And there's just like a liquid fondue like coming out of him still. He's still pooping after like 30 seconds. - That's awesome. - And it's just leaking out of him. And I scream, I scream in the room. And I'm like, help, help, and I, and then she comes in. She comes in and she opens the door. Like it's like the fucking like psycho. And she's looking on the inside of the bathroom. She's like, what happened? And I pick him up and I managed to catch him again. He's still biting me. And she spends like the next 30 minutes, like cleaning up all of the poop off the walls while I give him his first bath. But she still hates. I feel so bad because after like the next five minutes of like fighting, he gives up and he kind of goes like, I don't know if it's like overload, but he just kind of goes limp. - Yeah. - And then she starts freaking out. And she's like, oh my god, oh my god. Is he dead? Did he die? And I'm like, no, shut up. - Shut up! - It's hitting, it's hitting. - Shut up, bitch. - She starts pooping all the walls. - 'Cause I'm so fucking stressed. And I'm thinking about how I lived all of this was swift five years ago. I'm just the worst pet on her ever. - Dude, I can't wait for you to have a kid, bro. Oh my god. - Shut up, shut up. We just need to put a diaper on it. - We just need a hose. We just need a hose in it. - Yeah, so your shower isn't closed? - No, no, it's like open in the room. - That's tough. 'Cause that's what makes it really easy. 'Cause sometimes durs will just diariate all over his ass. - Yeah. - I've seen that. - I've seen that. - And then I'll have to lock him in the shower. And then I turn the water. And then I just let the water touch the feet. And there's nose like, oh fuck. - Yeah. - And then it's don't get nada. - And there just goes to the fucking glass and starts pawing at it. I'm like, bro. - You know what I mean? I'm gonna hit you with it. - Would you scrape all the poof off the wall that it leave like a head at that tube behind? Like a stain. - Dude, it sounds like the old episode of South Park where like Mr. Hanky would be bouncing around somewhere and get poop all over the place. - It was under the sink where there was the most. - It did leave that. - You should have been scrubbing for so long. - You shouldn't paint over. Like I have people get like someone that's like saying that you're tattooed on them. Like you should like paint over it. That's like a symbol. - It's like these weird videos where someone like cuts a hole into a table and then puts a cucumber in there and then like beautifully covers it up. - Yeah. - So far as you guys have been standing up there. - Dude, we lost that. AI took that away from us. - Yeah, dude. Yeah, that was a beautiful moment. - Those used to be the real videos. - And that's weird 'cause AI would be so good at making those. - Yeah, but AI just makes such crazy or shit. - Yeah. Yeah, AI makes like a girl at the Brazilian soccer game and there's fucking all this fucking dodge what she is coming out of her mouth. Is that Mario Lopez video? - Yeah, that was fucking crazy. - It is interesting that the president right now is just doing that, but for himself. Like he's just making himself into Spider-Man and going, "This is fucking awesome." - It's so crazy, bro. - I think someone just shows in the video, that's fucking great. - Yeah, someone else is doing this fucking great. - And he's like, "Wow, I'm Spider-Man." - This is amazing, and they post it. - Guys, I went to the Magic Castle for my birthday. Like I've always wanted to do. And I signed up for the Magic Box, the subscription model they have there. - What do you get out of Magic Box? - You get one more video on your reel every week of like Magic Reels of Magic Tricks and like an hour in the middle. - Yeah, so it's pretty good value 'cause I love getting videos on my timeline. 100 bucks a week and you just get reels, like one more. - You're paying for content. - Yeah. - Magic works for every content. - Are you getting 100 or giving 100? - I'm giving 100 a week. - And I get a video added to my reel. - It's a Magic Castle, it's like a pretty good. - $400 a month. - I'm gonna be honest with you. I think you need to cancel this like right now. And if I'm guessing that you signed up for this, I think you have a bunch of subscriptions. - Other than this. - But they asked me to give them every credit card I have. so they could make one subscription per credit card. - Okay, okay, okay, okay. You're gonna need, it's called Rocket Money. We've talked about it before. We've actually talked about it. You might even have it on your phone. - It's weird. - It is weird, I feel like. - I know you have it on your phone. - I've seen it. - Narratively, I think I'm a different guy for this bit. So I don't know if I have it on my phone. - No, no, no, you're the same guy the whole time. It's a linear story. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions or your wanted ones, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. You're giving up $400 a month to someone who scammed it. - This is a wanted subscription. So I think I'll keep it. - Nick, I made $5,000 in one year. - How? - I've literally been canceling subscriptions that I don't want. Sometimes even that I do. - Or figures? - Just to save some money. - In a year. - Oh, maybe I should get rid of the magic subscription. - Yeah, you get them all in one place. You can see all the things that you have accidentally or not accidentally thing. It's all in one place. It gives you a dashboard of clear view of your accounts. - But the magic castle is invite only. I don't know how to go back in and cancel it myself. - I think if someone says that it's invite only, they're just saying that. - I think what's cool about rocket money is, you can, they'll cancel it for you oftentimes. And in magic castle's case, I heard they send a guy there. - They send a guy? - Yeah, like a rocket money employee goes to Magic Kingdom. - She has to go. - They send a guy with an anti-magic. - Teddyba. (laughing) - And all it does is it stops magic in the area. - Yeah. And it looks like a big horn. It's very safe. - It's a very safe teddyba. - Anyway, let rocket money help you reach your financial as faster. Try for zero dollars at rocketmoney.com/yard. That's right. Rocketmoney.com/theyard to send the rocket money man to use his safe horn and change your life for a horn. - Rocket money man. ♪ Blow and hold through all the magic eyes. ♪ (laughing) ♪ This is a problem for the customer. ♪ - Oh man, back in the episode. - So how is Mama Cat? - She's amazing. - She's amazing. - Yeah. - She's a sweetie. - Yes. - I immediately, I feel like my life has changed 'cause she's just such a writer to- - And Liljet sucks. - Liljet's actually settling in. Liljet's evening out. - What do Mama Cat's do when there's no humans involved when baby cats poopin' all over the walls? - I don't know if baby Cat get would have gotten that scared, I guess. - 'Cause you're the big giant chasing it. - 'Cause I'm the big giant chasing it. - Also, I'm the cyclops. - They don't care about, the Mama Cat's not worried about scrubbing out the poop. - No, actually that's not true. She licks his ass all the time. - Yeah, but she don't lick the wall. - Nice. - No, no, no. She lets the bag down the wall. - She's fucking dignity. I hate to say it in, but I think your chance to bond with this cat has gone out the window. - Yeah. - And- - It's getting better. - I don't know man. - You're raising a dark chow. - Yes, you're raising a dark chow and it'll never be the same 'cause you threw it against the wall a bunch. - People, I didn't throw it. - You know what I liked when you could bring the gorillas and then make the gorillas make out with the chow. - Yeah, they go, they do this like this, shake it. - So weird in the lion, sorry. - You don't wanna do that. - It's not gonna get your battle too. You bring home animals and then the animals all fucking run and bring it on your chow. - You can bring the skill capsules that level their fucking dexterity and shit or you can bring them animals which give them different qualities. - The chow garden is an irreversible but damaged like indie devs. They're like so many indie devs start, they're like, "Fuck, I wanna make the fucking chow garden." - Yeah, I just wanna make it again. - I just wanna make the fucking chow garden. - And it's never great. - Yeah, the old Sega devs are just like, we don't know how, we forgot how. - We don't know what magic happened. - We forgot how. - It was a science. - I've never seen the garden. - Why do you never see your garden? - The Sonic Adventure 2 battle. - Yeah. - You just look at footage of the chow garden. - There's also the school. - I never thought. - There's only side areas of the chow garden. - I loved racing them. - Yeah, there's racing, there's boxing if I remember. - Is it a chow's box? - This is a tunnel in the background, yeah. - If you go through it, so this is where you raise and level your chows, but if you go through that tunnel back there, you can battle them. And then behind tails to the left, camera looks left, hopefully right. - Is this a mod? - That thing back there, this is a mod. That thing back there, they shouldn't look like knuckles like that. - You can get rid of your chows. You can abort them eight years into their life. - Oh, shine's really sad. - It shows you a picture, it shows you a picture of a chow with a stick and spindle. And it's like, are you sure you want me to go? - If you look up a chow garden without this, like these modded chows, because-- - I don't know, I don't know if they're-- - Because that one had one of every character from the game. - Oh. - Which was not the case. I don't like when you mod the chows. - I don't like when you mod the Nintendo. - I didn't do it. - I didn't do it in mod the chows. - You should mod an Nintendo platform at all. - No. - What else am I supposed to do? - The clean was so funny, bro. - Oh, well, I did ask Ludwig three days before. Yeah, see, oh, so you just put the animal close to him and they kind of kiss. I think in Sonic Adventure one, they actually touched. Maybe I just made that up in my head. - I think that's how you visualize it. - It's the vantage point. If you turn camera and look straight on, it looks like they're a lot closer. - But yeah, now you're giving your chow stats with the bunny. - The chow name is Jebus. - They're exploiting a glitch here that you can pick it up right after they're done with it and re-give it to them by the way. 'Cause usually it spends the animal, right? Me on my action replay, giving my Pokemon rare candies over in Oregon. - I asked Ludwig three days before, I was like, "Hey, can I commentate streamer games?" 'Cause I saw Pete was doing it. - Yeah, yeah. - And I said, "I need his cock." - You need Pete? - Well, I said, I just said that to the Ludwig, okay. - And then Ludwig said, "Yes, but Pete is not interested in being called Chomo Pete in front of 200,000 people." And I said, "Did he say that?" - Yeah, and then Ludwig said, "Yes." And I said, "Totally fine." And so this goes back to when I say things they tend to stick. - Yeah. - And this is sort of a PSA. Did anyone listen on the yard? Pete doesn't really like being called that. He's a father. - Here's a PSA. - If you're at an event in person that we're running. - Don't call Kelby Coxucker Kelby. - Don't do that. - Some things you can say. - Some nicknames are fine. - Don't do that. - I'll see you to distinguish the nuance here. - For sure, but I won't even say it myself. Just Pete. Let's leave it at peace. - Let's just call Pete. - And it's cleaner. - I think if you are a hip to that, I think it should be known, you know, because he's a father. And I was on my best behavior. And I did a great job. And Ludwig think I did a great job. Everyone did a great job. - You haven't listened back. - Did you think he did a great job? - I'll find out. I'll find out. - So it's content. It's contentious. - It's not contentious because it's just unknown. It's like, what's your view of the honesty? It's not a contention. I don't know. I have yet to see it. - I think I did so. - Dude, we were so happy that QD once Simon says, because QD kept coming over to us. She would lose a game and she'd come over to our group and she'd be like, oh, fucking dog. She had a fucking dog. It would be like, no. No, you're great. You're doing it. - I don't know. - She's like, I don't know. I can't even talk about what you're going to help me. - Like, yeah, of course. I might just like do it like this. And she'd go and she'd do kind of a brutal kick. And I'm like, but you're going to nail it when it's time. And then she'd come over to our group and like, oh my god. Fucking amazing. She'd walk away. We'd be like, oh, she's doomed. Like, this is going to be really bad. She's going to slip on a banana peel. And she won Simon says. And I was like, oh, she can feel the rest of that. - Yeah. As long as you get your won win. No, most people got like one moment with the exception of the UK. And basically all of USA. - UK was ass. - UK was ass. - Even the USA was ass. - USA was pretty ass. - You can't draft a hemophilia to compete in any sort of game. So you can't do it. I don't know why Connor choked. 'Cause he choked at bow and arrow. - Is he good at arch? - He's supposed to be good at that. - He said at arch, he's arched before. - He's arched. - Yeah. - That's interesting. - Like I've arched, like I'm good at archery. - Okay. I don't think you're good at archery. - You're good at archery. - You're good at archery and you're doing it. - If you're better, yeah. Okay. Second grader destroys first grader in awesome competition at school. - But I'm saying in streamer games, they're all first graders. - Yeah. Would you call yourself good then? - I would say-- - I'm containing that. I'm saying, you call yourself good. I think that's bastardizing the sport of arch. - I would say I would have one archery if I competed. - Was that a regulation p-k line? - 12 meters or 12 yards out. - It seems so far away. - I think maybe it just feels farther because you don't have the box to contextualize the dot. But no, it's 12 yards out or 11 meters, which we measure just with like the football hash. - What's all this talk? - What's all, what's all I don't know? - I'm here to talk. - Okay. - I'll tell you a post. - What's all this clay, he's clay. - You've been on clay. - He's a stinky little guy right now. He's implying that he might wanna do this for quite a bit longer. - He's being stinky. I can smell it. - He's reveling in the victory of the event and he's like, he comes home and he, he watched a movie about dancing and now he's like, I'm gonna be a dancer. And then in a week, he's like gonna be back to normal. - This is before Shimmer games. - The Shimmer games is going great up to it. (laughs) - What's going on with you? - Yeah, and now Kelbee's threatening to quit. And I'm on his ass. I said, Kelbee, I'll cancel you. - Kelbee is not threatening to quit. Kelbee is saying-- - Kelbee will drop. Kelbee is just a box sucker. - Kelbee is planning to quit on the timeline that he gave you when he started the job. - Yeah, and I have a gun who is fucking head. And I said, Kelbee, don't make me do it. - What are you doing? - I'll pull the trigger. - Kelbee's trapped here? - He is trapped. I do have a transcript from a meeting from last year that would bury him. - Interesting. - And Ludwig. - I'm the talented Mr. Ripley. And Kelbee is my beautiful Italian boy. - So what is this, what is this mean? - What is mean? - You want to be the, you want to be the money man for years to come now? 'Cause I thought we were one down. I thought you were going to Northern line Ludwig. - No, winding down. - I don't think I ever go to Northern line. - I think you do. We just got started. I think he's just getting started. - Just getting started? - We're just getting started in. Okay, you got two cats. All right. - Yeah. - I have a role in a Chinese cinematic film video game. - I'm 30. - He's 30, he just fucking beat Balotro forever. - I would say I'm kind of done. That's it. I don't. - Balotro was it? - Yeah, I finished it everything. - It's a mountain top. I'm done. - With Wall Street Fighter. I still have to hit 1600 with Goku. - Goku is my goal. - I'm quite done. - Like hit or like, he's getting this weird, right? - He's getting this 1600 with Goku. - Do we talk about this on the show? - I don't wanna do it because the rank system right now is early in the rank system. It's Mickey Mouse. I'm waiting for it to marinate. Okay? - You want to marinate. - So you're trying to make this 1600 more legitimate in your mind? - Yes, because if you hit 600 now, you're fighting plumbers. And I don't wanna kill plumbers with Goku. - You want to do that because the beginning of season is like a bunch of players. - Yeah, like the highest MR right now is like not close to the highest MR from a week ago. - Oh, I may have ruined your life without you knowing. I'm sorry. I hit up Shake Drizzle about three weeks ago. I was just like crazy idea. We both reinstall League and we play a casual. Just for fun, we go bot lane. I'll be your support. - It's weird. - And it was like, dude, I was just sitting on the couch thinking about what if I reinstall League of Legends. And I was like, dude, does this sound fun? Casual, no, right. Well, it's not do that. And he was like, and we on install after. I'm like, and we on install after. - This is crazy. - And I'm like, and I'm like, dude, it'll be great. We play, we have a blast. We're crushing bot lane. We're having such fun games the next day, you know? I'm not, League of Legends. You know, I was like, I didn't click the uninstalled button. - No, you're right. - I didn't click the uninstalled button. - But it's there. - What in my mind? I'm like, I don't knock it. I'm like, I'm playing with Shake Drizzle. - You have to pipe on the countertop. - I got a little message from Shake Drizzle. He goes, oh, he's emoji. What if we go bot lane again? - This is-- - And I'm like, well, we can just on install. We uninstall tomorrow. 'Cause it's been about 24 hours since the first game, right? So we play again. - Electric again. - We can just leave it. - Electric again. Play some League of Legends. - Uninstall League. - Can we talk about it? (laughing) - What is there to talk about? - I think I can manage it this time. (laughing) - Oh. - Like a moderate amount. - Yesterday was my day off, but otherwise I've been good. - How was yesterday? - I played all day. - Really? If we looked at rop.gg, how many games would it show, Shake? - It could be like 20. I lost most of them too. - 20 games? - Wait. - Were they ranked? - Is it per Shake Drizzle in A1? - Tell me, I just told you you have to look it up. - Did you play it out? - They were ranked. - No, no, no. I'm here, I'm at work. - You went to bed at 3am? Dude, this is like 20 games in a row. - So much Nassus. - Oh my God, yeah, he's doing-- - I'm learning how to do hero. - He's doing Nassus. - You're learning a new-- - Do you feel guilty at it? - So, Shake. - Dude, this is crazy. - I don't. - Has led you down a path that you should not walk. - You were so good, bro. You had such an awesome life. Work life, tolerance, love, fucking, interest, hobbies. You're doing PT. Don't lose it, bro. - Think about your family and friends. Think about your girlfriend. She loves you. - I know, well, she's gonna play with me, I think. - No. - No. - The crack is gonna be away from my girlfriend. - I've heard you crack. - Wait, he's like, what am I supposed to do? I get excited when Jesse and Jane like got back together and breaking bad? Stop this. - We know how that ended. - I told Nick, this is like taking an alcoholic to a bar and then leaving alone, 'cause he was just like, I actually don't feel like playing today. And that's what happened. (laughing) - Dude, you're disgusting. - Yeah, you're just hanging out here. Oh, here's something to catch by the way. - You're disgusting picnic. - Oh my God. - Jake Rizzle will message me at like 1am, go. And if I'm like, nah, it's 1am, he's like, wow. That's, he know he does. He talks to me like, he talks to me like, like he's my daddy. Like he'll send me a gift that's just like, the guy in the button up with the tie going like this. (laughing) I'll reply like, yes, yes, I'll be there in a moment. He says, you'll be here now. (laughing) - We were playing, I was just talking about, we were playing. And all I wanna do is go support and play with him bot lane and have fun. 'Cause we're like looking at the same stuff. I don't wanna be on the other side of the map. I don't wanna like, really play the game. And Mike was like, oh, can I jump in your guys' game? And I'm like, of course, I'm playing support. Jake's playing AEC. And it was kind of like an awkward setup. And I was like, oh, I can just go made it. That makes things easier. Jake plays one game with Mike and bot and Jake's having like, triple the fun. And like, it is like, oh my God. Mike, we're a lecture time. (laughing) And next game, Jake's like, yeah, Mike, stay lulu. Let's like, do that again. And I'm like, oh. (laughing) I'm like, okay, shit. You know, so you want me to be min? And Jake's like, oh, well, it's not like that. And I'm like, well, it's like that. 'Cause you don't wanna play with me and bot. And Mike's like, I can go. And I'm like, no, stay. (laughing) - No, stay. It's like the dinner party office. - Yes. - Yeah. (laughing) And so very quickly, I was just delegated to like, being vex mid. And I would do something cool. And Jake would say nothing. I'd do something bad. And Jake would be like, oh, it's not supposed to, you're supposed to wait for the blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, well, you told me that we're like, fighting like a couple in front of Mike. - What have you done? (laughing) 'Cause he messaged me. - I immediately stopped playing with Jake. I was like, immediately stopped playing. - He messaged me. And he was like, he was like, hey, bro, come play League of Legends with me and Jake. - Dude, what is, what did I do to you? - I said, you must be out your fat ass mind. (laughing) And I said, no, I'm not gonna do that. And then I didn't. And then all this shit happened. - Scream print shirts or something? - No, it was funny 'cause of why I said no to shake. But I played League on a day where like, I got so much done. Like it was so productive all day. And I had like a, things I was putting off forever. I was just doing that day. And I was just like, oh, I feel so good. I should reward myself as League. That's complete bullshit. - Can you please count? 'Cause I couldn't do it. But you just count and then show us the number of how many games he has played, shake in the past twenty-three hour. Twenty-four. - Twenty-seven in two days. - Oh my god. - That's more than I was playing when I was streaming. - Me and Shake never played more than like four. - You are, you, this is your disgusting. - That's really bad. - So I want to say sorry. - You know that he is a weak feeble mind. - 'Cause I don't care what happens to Shake, but I did come into the office today and there's just like on top of his desk, taking up the entire desk and unplugged like DJ setup, like a turntable. - Yes. - I was just like, oh, he's never editing again. - Oh. - Twenty-one. - No, twenty-one. - No, twenty-one. - Yesterday. - I think he's in twenty-four. - Don't apologize to you. - Yeah, I don't want that effect on you, you know? - Dude, and he already, he had some drama of streaming games too. - Oh. - What? - 'Cause he put a drop into the musical chair. - He did musical chairs, he used the DJ. - He put a drop in the show. - I was like, what the fuck? I was saying that to Pete when we were just watching it. - I was like, I don't know what to do with that. - He cuts it before the drop. - He cut it after the drop so the drop would hit and be like, do, do, do, do, do, do. And everyone would sit and then he goes, drop the bass. And everyone would be like, no. - That's funny. - It's evil, bro. - He did musical chairs. - But he had dropped a musical chair. It's like, I never think of that, but it's so funny. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Dude, apparently Selbit is a, he's a huge massive streamer. - Yeah. - I didn't know that. So when I called him Selbit, 'cause it sounds similar, and made a joke about that, I got a lot of tweets at me in Portuguese. - Yeah. - And I didn't really know who's going on. - And they weren't saying come to Brazil? - Yeah. - Well, they might have been for, he, maybe there's a come to fucking Brazil right fucking now. - I talked to him a little bit after the event. He came up to me and was like, hey man, I just want to say congratulations on this event. Like, really good work. And I was looking at him like, so confused, 'cause I'm like, oh, I didn't work on this at all. I'm not involved in this even, it'll chant gently, even a little bit. He's like, oh, I thought you like did all of this. Like, no. And I walked away. I was like, who was that guy? I guess I'm into the internet. Who was that guy? I looked him up and I'm like, oh my god, he's like three times bigger than Ludwig. - In followers. - Yeah. - I know about streaming size. I was like, oh my god, he has massive. - He's Mox City. - Mox City. - And he's like, they were Dan Najarian. - I got, maybe I was Dan Najarian. - Mox City. - Yeah, I don't know. This close, it can be either way, but you could just into both of them. - You give Liza. - Yeah? You see what Liza got me from my birthday? - No. - I was talking to my Twitter, you did. - Oh my god, was that her? That's so sweet. - Liza comes up to me and she's covering her mouth. And she's like, I did something drunk. And I'm like, what do you do? Is that I'm like, do you need me to cover you for you somewhere? And she's like, I got you a hawk to a cameo. - And she plays me this video. It's a hawk to it. I'm like, it belly well into her bed. And she's like, it's Xbox 360 summer. Okay, bye. It's amazing. And I was like, this is the best day ever. - I thought Bishop did it. - No, no. That's a great-- - That's so sweet. - He was very sweet. - He gets it for God it again. - That's okay. - I got it freaking one month ago. I've been holding it. - Wow. - I got a sonic amibo given to me on my actual birthday by someone at the party. I think it was one of the only gifts I received was a sonic amibo. And I was like, cool. - Thanks for the sonic. - But it's on my desk. - Okay. - You guys know, we used to carry cash around. We carry cash. People had registers. - Cash key. - Cash key. Cash key. - Cash key. Cash key. - Cash key. - That's a really cool thing recently, is I've been going to a bunch of stores. They got this little, they got rid of the register. they got, just got this like what? a little box and I think you don't have to pay for anything because I was like, they can't take my cash. I just show up. So I just, I usually just walk in and take, take what I want. I leave. So you don't engage with the little white box, this little square shape thing that's at the store. No, I mean, that's, I, it's just a box. I don't know what it does. And that's actually a square checkout key. It's super quick, easy to use. And you can also get loyalty points. It's eventually going to get caught. But if you just bring your phone or your card or whatever, square makes it actually really easy. You just go, you swipe it, you pay for your wares and you leave. How would I pay with my phone? It's just a white box, right? It is interesting. But yeah, you hold it up to the little white thing. It's like that. If you go box to box, then I think it's how you do it. Now it just works. Now, a lot of, wait, if I get a lot of these loyalty points and they, they're, I'm going in and they're saying, do you would you like to use them? And I say, no, I just kind of let them build. You hoard them. I make them bigger. Yes. Can I be honest with you guys? What I've been, I don't think I've been paying for, I haven't paid for anything. I like finding good news is they have square police. And with square police, you can, anyone who comes to your store to rob for whether it's a one location shop or a business with multiple teams or service areas, they're going to find you. That sounds really simple and easy. I don't know. I'm the coolest thing with squares. It scales with you, right? So like, maybe if you're going to a small business, they give you like one square, like guy, can anyone do this? Like if I was running my business, like I could just, absolutely. And if your business scales up, you get a whole platoon. Let me give you a real seller stat. Businesses using square online are in 36% more revenue on average at them. 77% of invoices get paid within a day being sent. Listen to that, bro. And a 53% increase in spend from customers with the square loyalty program. Don't be like eight and 20% more with a square police on Marauders and thieves like you. If you're out there, you're starting a business or running one that deserves better tools. Square helps you sell, managing, grow without slowing down. Right now you can get up to $200 off square hardware at square.com/go/yard. That's squar.com/go/yard. Run your business smarter with square. Get started today next to something because Nick has requested. Yeah, I'm not going to shake it. Why? What the fuck is that? Because I'm about to give him something. I gave him a completely optional. He said you don't have to, you don't have to. But if you ever comes to you, I want you to play out and ring. I want to watch because I'm this is I'm going to I'm going to find time later this year to stream. I don't want it. I'm bad at video. I cannot. I want to do this. I can't. I'm going to be the. I'm going to be the low count on the stream. You should. You should stream. I'm not requesting this. But you should couch-quest it. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I probably can't fit that in. The Aussie guys invented like a format of playing games where like you. You get on the couch and you cannot leave the couch to be the game. But a hair of man will take care of you. And I probably wouldn't be able to do like my duties or responsibilities effectively if I catch. You'll have your a lot because I have a lot to do. That's pretty good. Maybe our souls won. Eldon rings crazy. No, no. Here's the thing. You're right. If it was a couch quest, Eldon rings crazy. I'm afraid he'll only ever play one. That's why I chose Eldon. Yeah. I mean, if you don't finish Breath of the Wild, which is like Babby's first souls like. I don't know. It also beautiful game. It is beautiful. You don't know. I've played most of it. You've played some of it twice. He could play Dark Souls 3. I'm I'm about to finish it. Dude, watching Nick play Dark Souls is it's like an. It's an unbelievable experience. It's not that bad because. Dude, it's that bad. It's not that bad because there's a thing. Ben watches he played to and Ben's played more Dark Souls. I think anyone here. And he he was shocked to hear your opinion because he was like, you're fine. He told me I'm fine. I think it was my I just went over to Nick's house the other day was watching play Dark Souls. And I think it was my telling him gently a couple of things about the game. It's funny though. Like I agree with you Nick because I think when you beat Dark Souls, you look back at someone playing Dark Souls. You're like, fuck it. You're not the player. I also also that you're watching when I played Eldon ring. I own I played blind. So I'd never watched anyone play before. I didn't know anything about like, you know, all I knew was you rolled a dog stuff. I literally thought I knew. And I only got to Godric. It's all I didn't go any further than Godric. So when you're watching people in Dark Souls, this is my base my first time. You're watching my first eight hours of Dark Souls. It's not about being lost or anything like that. It's about simple because Nick's a smart guy. But the way that, okay, I know you're talking about because the big thing that he think in front of me for is that I know what Embers did. No, not even I don't even care about that. I can't think of something crazy. I think he's in the catacombs. He's in the cart, the tomb, the cart, the tomb, the catacombs. And he's running around. He's killing skeletons, hard game, whatever you die. I just run at the well, you don't want to think too much. You just want to fight. I get this a guy. He kills a guy. It drops a big shiny big shiny. And when Nick England was playing this a lot, he would be playing in discord and just be like shiny. His own yeah, his own tick big shiny drops. Nick looks at it, turns and just sprints the other way. I miss a couple of Chinese. And it was his CV is gigantic. It was like the size of like, like a fat head on his wall. And he just turns and he runs away to nothing. And I said, are you going to get that? And he's like, get what? To my defense, to my defense, there's kind of an awkward sometimes with certain enemies to lay where you kill them. And then they turn into white mist. And then the items and drop until they're like fully better shiny drop. That means that it's a better shiny. I've been playing for a couple hours at the time. I've been played it yet. But it seems like I'm with you guys. I'm with you and Nick. I really want it to be on your side. I always want to be on your side, Nick. But I literally will kill myself for a shiny. I'm not here to say I'm a master. I'm not here to say I'm the goat. I'm here to say look guys. I'm about to I'm playing the final boss right now. I beat first phase first try that I died immediately after my first try lower sender. Yeah. Cool. And I'm at I'm 26 hours into the game. Over. Over. Was that anor Londo part cool? It was really cool. Your fucking. Yeah. I needed help for this part. Well, this is probably the most mind blowing part for me was Ben showed me the part where you like do it. I won't like I guess spoil it. I don't know. But you like do a gesture and you go to like a more secret place. Dragon Peak. Remember when I told you he go if you're played Dark Souls 3. He goes up to where you go to our dragon peak. He's going through the Irithield dungeon. And he and he's like he sees the the dressing dragon statues and he's like, what's that? And I was like, I don't know. Oh, I point out because when Ben showed me, I was like, I've been here before for sure. And I and I even like looked at all them. And I'm like, if I hit them, do they come alive? This seems so weird. Yeah. Do they come alive? You have to tell me I'm like, they don't come alive. I don't know anything. Yeah. Ben was just like take a seat. And I take a seat. And it was by far my favorite part of the game. Yeah, it was really fun. I went to that whole area, finished it. I was like, yeah. How was there? How's he doing there? I thought I don't know. You love the fucking covers. I was cement and you're like, what are you doing? I'm like, I needed that. I needed the slab. I love that game. Which fight? Oh, the name of the game. Yeah. No, it was fun. Hey, dragons. I didn't like coach by then. Not for the fight. High key. Ben isn't coach me in any any fights. Thank you at all. I trust you. I will say this. I was watching play. It was I was being very gentle. He didn't know about Embers. I didn't laugh at him. I was like, yeah, Embers. They're pretty good. He pops it. He's like, oh, don't my health bar immediately. I was like, yeah, that's Embers, kiddo. But when he went into shiny, we never ever had past the shiny. I was like, what are we doing? Here's my problem. I can't defend the shiny. He's kind of just didn't see him. But but with items because like, because I was telling us about it, because Ben was making fun of me for certain, not understand what your items are to. And I was just like, when you're a long time Dark Souls player and you know what all the items do, it's so obvious. But in the game, when you read what items do, a lot of times, it's like, like dried fingers in example. It's like, use at your own caution. And that's the only description of what that does. Yeah. And so many items are written cryptically. Yeah. Where they do the game just wants you to do it. But there's just like looming pressure as someone who like kind of knows what Dark Souls is, but has never played it where it's like, what if I use this item and I only ever get one? And I was supposed to give it to this side quest item to get the best ending. And like, I always have that feeling. So I use nothing. I blame you, zero. I raged playing Elden Ring and I dropped 30 rune arcs. Oh. And they're like the best item. Yeah. Rune arcs are important. My girlfriend's playing Dark Souls one. And she pops a humanity and it like filled her health bar. And I was like, that's a good item. Use it in your next boss fight. And Ben's like, maybe don't overuse humanity. And I'm like, why? It's so good. Farm the rats. Did you? Did you do the untended graves? The untended graves remind me what it's like. He hasn't done the untended graves. I might have. I'm bad. I'm bad at names in the game. Me too. It's it's like the starting area. Where you go back. And it's dark. It's dark. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then you go back to the fireling shrine. And it's like you were never there. And it's like no one. And all the things you've done that are out. Very cool. Oh my God. Great game. You have to find the Lord's ascender and he goes dark and then you can't go on the adores. You don't know any of this. No. He won't remember. He knows I was fun. I mostly played Mario. 10 minutes of phone time at wipes is memory. I think. Yeah. I think with Ben's confirmation, I think I've done everything. Not sorry. Not everything. I haven't done DLC. And there's a bunch of side quests I haven't done. But I think I did all the like, non-optional bosses. I said the optional bosses. And I think I just have to do Lord's Center. Then I'll do Very fucking good great game great fucking game great game What do you think about what do you think or are a little marathon approaches? It's not very far away guys when is it again do you think we'll be do you think we'll be changed people? I'm not looking forward to playing with Josh. Well, here's the issues Josh hit 10k and CS 2 which now is his like peak rank. I think he said he's going to stop playing. I don't know if he did well, he would do you know about his actual goal? Oh, yeah, like 20k 20k in three months. Yeah. Six months he raised it. He was three. He was three. He said three. But he hit 10 and he said he's going to stop because it's like Josh you understand that for this challenge, we have to gain 4k. So if you come in your peak elo, then we have to get 4k above your peak elo because everyone's elo has to go up. Yeah, I'm going to hit I'll hit a peak elo in this challenge. Oh, I don't know. I don't know what I'll play center. That would be all of us. Maybe except for you, we'll have to hit a peak elo. I think if we go from where I'm at right now, I will also hit a peak. And shit, we're not going to hit it. I just really want to check something that I think is really awesome to check, which is looking at Josh's steam account and then seeing how much how much counter strike he's played. He's actually in a game right now. Quite a bit. What is his name again? Smile. Are you going to do your placements before we start this marathon? Yeah, that's my game plan. Did it reset? Because I should do that. Yes. Yes. There's no reason to do yours. You could do yours. It doesn't hurt or help. But isn't it advantageous because it gives me a benchmark to start at? It gives you, but like the benchmark is still there. You just don't know what the benchmark is. The only reason I need to do it is because our goal is based around my elo. So I need to know my elo to make the goal more accurate. So what's the goal again? You have to gain 4k. My goal initially is 16k, but like, for example, if I rank to 15k, then maybe I'll make the goal different. I see. Josh has played 500 hours of counter strike. And what is it? Two months. There are a lot. And 12 hours on aim labs. Dude. Let's rebound. Dude, that's like the pie on Street Fighter. Oh, no. And go in their profile. You see how much rank they've played and how much training room? I'll give him some credit. He's been doing a lot of refrag. He spends a lot of time on refrag, which is what's refrag? It's like the in game practice in game practice engine. So you can like practice like preamming on like maps and there's like many games. There's smoke line ups. I'm a white prick. Cool. Yeah. That's five E map guy. I'm a I'm a 30 I'm a 30 seconds. I'm a 30 seconds. I'm a game bots guy into queue. Fuck it. Fuck it. Run it. I need. Dude, I competed in a Twitch Rebels Valoran tournament. Yeah. Yeah. That was before we talked about it. Fucking. He made fun of your killjoy. I said you played good. And you didn't piss me off. You looked miserable. I will say that. And then oh, did you. There was a Valoran tournament. Oh, what did for shopfire, Belian, we're in a Valoran tournament to make it to the plans for champs like tier two. Double. And the Valoran tournament had seven hours of tech delays. So they delayed it to the next day. Oh my God. It was the best of five. They made it three games in. It was two one. Oh my God. Then it goes to game five. Game five has another three hours of tech delays. We come out of the tech delays. We lose. What can you do? What can't you do? It's all rude. It doesn't happen like that anymore. That was awful. It was a 15 hour series of Valoran's hard, but I can say, but I think Valoran's not that hard. We've ironed things out to a point where you don't see things like that happen. It used to happen a lot, but not all the rest. But it happened. It shouldn't be that hard. Well, it shouldn't be that hard. But it always is. Every game doesn't have some points. Every game shouldn't be harder to pull off than a Valoran 5v5 LAN. You would be surprised. I agree. I do agree, but I think they make it right. It makes it weird and hard though, because they got fucking the tube. They have the weird proprietary LAN thing, like not, you know, with Counter Strike, like anybody could set up a LAN server. Yes, but for Valoran, they would die to fucking come who has the cube that he unveils. And then they have their weird proprietary like in-game overlay software. You don't really have like a good demo system. Yeah, Drew Levin. It's like, why did you make it like this? Drew Levin has to DM a woman on Twitter for you to be able to use the League of Legends to turn them into clients. Yeah. It's like, it's literally coded in- I just want to know, because I don't know how much if any def-deformation we've done today. Oh, you know what I'm- I'm sorry. You want to defend Sam Aldman? Okay. Green. Okay. You need to defend another guy out there. And even if you fucking- if you fucking turn your fucking back on him, that doesn't fucking change me. I didn't turn my back on him. You literally just want to take- I think I should be as a guy on the show privy to the amount of information. That's defamation. Well, this is all parody, you know? This is all parody. Nick really trying to get out of it now. No. Deep into the things that save him. No. parody law, probably. Probably, probably. You know what? I think go ahead and say, you know what, Drew Levin, I stand with you too. I'm- I'm asking if it's defamation or not. I don't know. I don't know what that means. My-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my-my, Drew Levin. Sam Aldman. Yep. Um. Um. The hate-green part of it has like, poop. Probably coming down from the top of it. And uh, and the-the biker gang who showed up with Mr. Beast. Yeah. He's probably on there. The peanut butter biker gang. Mr. Beast is gonna be the first president to detonate a nuclear weapon after Japan. After what? After World War II. He'll be the first guy to do it. Like, why don't we just do it? Dude. Mr. Beast is gonna be the president. That is so weird. Yeah. He probably will. It's gonna happen. It's gonna happen now. He won't lose. He could lose. He will get the most amount of young people to the polls in history. I just don't think somebody who like, built their career primarily in entertainment could become president. Yeah. Yeah. Dustin. The tape's drop of him being like, I grabbed my grabbed Carl's pussy. And everyone's like, that made him more awesome, actually. Would you like access the nuclear weapons? Yeah. Yeah. They thought it would sink him, but they just thought it would walk a room talk at the be-at the beast facilities. Or Carl's gonna be Secretary of State. Yeah. I like that. Yeah. I think he'd do great. I really think he'd do great. - The PewDiePie. - The PewDiePie Bridge. - All right, we need Secretary of State. - I think he keeps Marco Rubio just straight up. - Yeah, Secretary of Treasury, money guy. - Money guy. - What's his name? I have the ice coffee hour guy. - Oh, great, Steve. - Graham Steve is probably trying to protect your defense. - Education, we probably do air rack, right? Because Mr. Beasts is like those who can't do teach. So he'll be like, the guy wants to be me so bad, is gonna educate people on how to book me. - Department of Energy probably, now probably Jesser. - The Department of Energy handles nuclear weapons. - Interior has to be Mr. Who's the boss. Because Bro has been working on the inside of his house for like three years on YouTube. And like, do the amount of fucking machines he have that make like rare pieces of bread or like the coffee, he would be sick. - At that, Attorney General, the Master of Law. - What about Mr. No Law? - He thinks he squeezes Mr. Beats in here? - Who's that? - Maybe Mr. Beats. - Who's Mr. Beats? - He brings back FPS Russia. - FPS Russia. - Battery defense? - FPS Russia, does he shoot someone? - He shot and killed someone allegedly. - Wow. - Allegedly? - No, he didn't. - All this property from a gun shot. - Didn't he got a present? - I think he- - He looked like a present person. - Bullshit, but I got him for weed. - Attorney ATF was after him. - Attorney General only used me blood. - We're gonna get him there. - Okay, that's that. Wouldn't be my first name. - Health and Human Services. - X-Jah. - Yeah, white boy 7th Street. - This actually isn't the full cabinet 'cause AI is so dumb, that like shit. It also says that Pam Bondi is still the attorney general, which is really funny. - 23 members. - He, look. - The presidential succession line is really interesting. - Yeah. - Because the secretary of agriculture can become president if enough people die. - We've never gotten past VP, right? - No, I don't think so. - What about, what about Delta? - That's right, agriculture, I probably be Maya. - Do I sneak into this? - Hey, you're sneaking that. - No, I don't think I sneak into this. - No, come on, you get, um. - Director of the Office of Management and Budget, probably Nick Allen. - Nash. - No, Director of National Intelligence, Grog. - Grog? - Yeah. - What's up Pussy? - He's a real man. - A real man. - That he's just taking stuff. - This is the easiest setup for a bit ever. We can't finish this list. - I can do this in two minutes. - All right, Secretary of Commerce. - Secretary of Commerce, we're gonna need to go once again. Once again. - No, I won't do it here. Was that not Graham T Graham Stevens Graham Stevens that was a treasury. Oh, okay - Different. - Okay, it's signed. - No, it's face banks. - Face banks, cause we're gonna do, we're gonna do Clarna. - We're gonna do Clarna. - All right, we are doing, now U.S. minted Chrome Hearts. (laughing) - Dude, are we giving this Saudi Arabian shit? - Oh, it'll be so funny. - And then you can quit. - Can you send Zip? I can actually send it, I can send it. - We've sent you, we've sent you 10 F 35s and a beautiful pair of-- - Rikki. - Rikki has permeated my, I have a new vocal stand. - Rikki banks? - Yeah, by banks. - Right. - Slime sent me something that he posted on Instagram. (laughing) - You guys, you almost tapped in Banks' fan, there it is. - You know what's happening to me? Shake Drizzle, and then I was like laughing, and he's like, dude, it is my one dream in life to meet Rikki. As we shake said to me. - Do you know what I was thinking? His last dream was, not in Slime, we're commentators, and Slime left and he went, yeah, not just get making this bit about how like fucking money lacy is. And then I realized, Slime just stole that and I spent the last year, biting nuts shit, glazing legs. - I didn't steal it, he opened my eyes, Ludwig. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Okay. - And all of our wine, until we are-- - The nut was like a priest. - I do remember, you left thinking like, yeah, he did it too much, so that's what you said. - It was literally clarity. - You were thinking too much. - I did, and you know who I didn't bring up a single time on this broadcast? Because he wasn't at the fucking thing. He's getting surgery today. You're saying he wasn't invited until he got hurt? - No, he's never invited, but he's still getting surgery today. - And that's what I'm saying. - Can I see this, it's in the door chat. - Wrong one, LOL. - Wrong one. - Is it that or which one? - Wait, no, not our one. - It's really cool. Hold on, it'll be up on the screen and here just in just a moment. Aiden, do a little dance for me. - I can't search your name. - Swim through the haters. - I don't know why I can't send it to you. - I don't know how to do it. - He's got it. - He's got it. - He's got it. - And my pants have knee pads on them. - What's a work heart? - What's permeated my vocal stem from this. Can you do them in? Can we read it at the top? - What? - It's so low resolution. - What is happening with technology? Is it rocked down? My God. - Well either way, I'll just read it 'cause this is a matter of they can read it. Slime sends me this image, and this is something that a fan sent to FaZe Banks. Someone in our community made this. And the trippiest, craziest part is how accurate my house is, really insane. I can't stop saying this is the trippiest crazy. - It's an AI, like picture of Banks as like a Pixar character with a big Dalmatian that goes up to his shoulders. And he's wearing-- - Huge Dalmatian. And his head is massive. - It has this guardian angel. If I'm not confused, it's meant to say Palm Angels, which is a brand in the same font. - And it changed it. - Maybe there's another brand. - It looks like a Funko Pop became a real person, like a real animated Funko Pop story. - But we're trying to get Trippie Crazy to spread. - Trippie Crazy, you guys want to use that? - The funny Trippie Crazy is, this is Trippie Crazy. - I was gonna say bro, the dog looks cute. - I won't give him, the apartment is exactly the same. - 'Cause we've been there a lot. - They can't get dog fingers, right? Not to be the fingers guy, but it does have two on the one hand. - Is it three on the other? - Are these the other flowers? - Yeah, Trippie Crazy. - You know what? Nevermind. - Is that what? - We're almost at Time, bro. Rosebud Thor and Tremor Games. Rosebud Thor now. - Um. - Thor, no Lacey, next. - Yeah. - No, no, you're a real Thor. I want to know you're a real one. - Bud, Lacey's gonna be okay. - Rose, Lacey will rise again. - So if you were to do Rosebud Thor, like non-Lacey edition, what would you say? - My phone was. V-A-R. - Yeah. - Oh, there's so baby about it, Rose. - It was my fault, though. I said they had V-A-R and it just, I thought it'd be fun and it became just a wine sesh. Which. - I think. - Do you think that if the V-A-R, like iteration loop, like the amount of times you could just like immediately go, "Well, let's see it." And it could immediately pop up and watch it. Do you think it would have been fine? - I think it was like how it kind of paused everything. - What I didn't like about V-A-R is that it would happen well after the play. And so then it would be like rewind. And then we're like in the, like this is like a multi-verse now. 'Cause this is like three. - Yeah. - It's gotta change so many things. - Yeah, it'd be like, let's call V-A-R and we're in a second dodgeball game. So it's like, okay, you want to end this dodgeball game, go back to the other dodgeball game. Now you're, it's so it's like. - Hey, do you think a solution is setting, like V-A-R, you have to call it within like, - Yes, I would think it have to be some sort of recent. - Yeah. - And then also it was like being done. So yeah, I just think V-A-R was, I thought it'd be cooler in my head. - It is funny 'cause you encounter basically the exact same problem it has and like actual football feel like. And so like people, people review the play, like they go through this whole thing, the goal gets scored and then it's like, oh, well I think ABS is like a better, like ABS and baseball is good. Because ABS is like right after the pitch. - Have to have. - You call it and if it's like next pitch happens, it's too late. - Yeah. - You don't get to be like for the last one. - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah. - It's funny how soccer players like, who like a really die hard will justify. Like, there'll be like V-A-R is bad because part of soccer is tricking the referee. Like you're supposed to flop. That's part of the game. - Yeah, we talked about this a couple of episodes ago and they got mad on Reddit at us and it's interesting. - Fuck 'em man. - It's been an argument for a long time. - No, you're right. Flopping is awesome. - Guy who made that thread. - The most sanctioned, like sanctity of soccer. - Let's flop more often. - Yeah, that's the thing we mentioned in the beginning of the episode. It's another iteration of him. - I've seen some crazy versions of that thing. - Of that pig. - There's a lot. - 'Cause that one got back. 'Cause I think that's the Josh. I think Josh sent that in a way that got to you. - I saw it on Twitter. - Oh, he saw it on Twitter. - He posted it. - Either way, I've seen lots of those. Pretty much my entire timeline. Really good guys. Keep that up. Only ones put it in Nick's zone in the Patreon which is where we're going now. - I want to hear his fucking rosin butt. - He come here. - I don't care. - I'm just afraid of finishing it. - You don't even care. - You know what? - I saw something's up and I went into a mode. - I'm looking forward to the fucking Patreon. - I guess we'll find out. - I guess you have to pay. - You're buds the Patreon? - I feel so bad. I didn't mean to cut you off, man. - Can I do the Patreon? - It's like Dark Souls 3. He didn't notice the shiny. - You were fine. - Can I do the Patreon episode this week? - Like, solo it? - No, can I just come to it? - No. - If you're going to ask him, we have an option. - I kind of want him. - Giving us the option. - You don't wear pants with knee pads in them and we'll think about it. - You're dressed like Joni and we're getting coffee and we have to drink all of this. - You have to drink all of it. You have to drink all of it. - You have to drink all of it.