Ep. 235 - Slime's New Look

well guys what do you think it's a real it's a real it's like a dom like a domer vibe yeah that's good right yeah he was handsome if we could say some nice things some sort of ceo i don't know who that is you don't look like a serial killer what do i look like you look like the episode of fairly odd parents where it's the universe where you didn't have fairly odd parents it's like this is slime if he was never on the yard what it's like we were able to meet you in a multiverse where you never did the yard this is what you'd look like maybe a little more you'd be like hey i'm anthony hi this is you can call me by my government i do sudoku puzzles uh in the yeah of course of course it's but you justify you'd be like it's a japanese tradition and i sleep on the floor where i do my sudoku puzzles dude do i do and i occasionally forget my girlfriend's birthday but i love you brought that you brought that into the show man i should have i forget it too i've forgotten it girlfriend i don't know my girlfriend's and you know and what i don't tell her i don't really want to know i don't want to know it what are we gonna do get you something that's what valentine's day is that's what valentine's day is birthday for girls valentine's day is your birthday and my birthday's halloween between that and the fourth of july it's like she's got three birthdays every year this came up because nick asked me he was like what was that one guy who used to play smash's name uh that one melee player's name that we haven't talked to in like nine years and i immediately rattled it off yeah and then i was like oh my god i don't know what's going on i don't know what's going on i don't know but sometimes i if i if i decide my girlfriend's birthday right now i think i would kind of miss and that's how my hard drive works i think cutie understands my hard drives like that too because she's just now telling me what she wants for valentine's day you're finally there i'm there she just tells me she gave up she gave up she just tells me like she's like i want this and then she'll think about it and she'll be like oh and also this while we're at it okay what's the budget range of what she wants uh it's not high like for christmas she wanted a hot cocoa maker okay which is just like a like a kettle that's kitchen slop this is easy big oven just type gift that's actual kitchen actually i can give you this it's a blood pressure monitor okay those are like 30 bucks and a apple watch okay hold on now wow that's the exit strategy 38 millimeter wow the the the small one the venom and the cure the poison and the antidote i call that a white girl speedball we got a well crow skis how are we doing i think so why well southern lion we're doing that's already no it's a funny take here it's already been done no but why i have glasses because i went to the eye doctor a while ago dude they did so many crazy tests on me and i i fucking aced them like crazy how what do you what do you mean like i test so i think he aced the test they come out like yeah he's gay you have to look at the little house that's far away uh yeah i looked at the house i could see everything in it there were two guys in the window it was yeah it was but no i i was they did like this test it was a reaction test and i was like dude is it the gray button it's the yeah it's the button and you're testing your peripheral whenever you see the gray squiggle yeah i i'd be throwing in a few like just in case you know i was no i you never prejudiced i was slamming that shit and the guy's like wow you're really good i don't like i fucking know yeah i did it that's why i got glasses like three months ago it seems like when's it start this is you know what this is this is here's my frustration because i go in i finally take my eye appointment because i'm i'm getting i'm getting annoyed that when i'm late and i'm in an airport it's hard to read the signs at the end of the hallway now it's fucking it's just fucking annoying and i'm like i'll go in i'll get my eyes tested i take the same test i also ace i hit we destroy shit like that 100 grandma trying that i'm the most yourself i'm the most locked in okay glasses yeah i know we're both talking about how you ace a test you both walk out with glasses like you guys fail well i just you know no no no i assume she told us the same thing which is that she's like you pass all the tests like you don't need glasses if you want you can get them like but there's really no reason to buy these i got these because i'm driving at night sometimes and it's a little blurry and i didn't like that that's the only use case boom and then i fucking go there and i do it and it might they did like physical tests on my eye and the lady sat me down she actually sat down in front like like front wise she pulled up and she pulled up next to me and she said i want to be real with you and she's just like this older older lady she's really small and she said you have the most perfect eyes i've ever done a test on ever and i said thank you i shook her hand yeah well she shook my hand and took her hand off your thigh she shook your hand no that would never excuse me i don't know her birthday but i would never cheat on her and uh she shook my hand and i said thank you and then she said yeah you're a little bit far-sighted you're super fine but here's how the glasses work and then i picked them up like a month later because i forgot and then i came in here and then everyone was respecting me everybody respects him more now it's good that you didn't choose circles you're quieter did this you're quieter with him no i was playing blotro i know no he's quieter you're quieter he's quieter i've noticed it yeah you're thinking more i think you're more yeah i think you're more you're you're like thinking about what's going to come out and you're saying i don't i doth not i think most of your outbursts have been you actually can't see anything yep you're just freaking out because you're blind yeah you're a scary dog starts to go blind it starts barking at the fucking mailbox opening that's what swift's dealing with guys i can't see you get the fuck over here weird shit i can't see you just assume he's doing the worst thing because he can't see he usually is usually but today he wasn't now that you see yeah today he was he was really normal he was like writing emails and it was really but usually i swear to god i can see crazy fucked up nasty porno on his monitor yeah and the tour browser yeah and it's a workplace and i slap him and i say get the fuck off there what are you doing what are you doing and i but today it was normal oh yeah let's keep those on yeah you're gonna get crazy headaches man well i'm only gonna wear them at night when i drive this fucking life when you don't wear them all the time that's when you get the headaches i'm the last one i guess new look well he has performative glasses too and no one talks about it i'm saying you guys all have glasses my theory with you is that you're that points early but you die way sooner like you're dying 41 yeah i'm like you're gonna be like 2020 like the most ripped the most handsome the most rich until four but then 41 hits you're dead i think that's great though right it's a choice it's a way to live but i don't know what you're saying he's not doing trend that's what like that's what i'm saying like like what god rolled him yeah like this is a fireball it doesn't make sense that his life could be so good up until this point without ending early would you rather a 30-year career where you're averaging five points off the bench or you're a starter who's like you know in mvp conversations for like six years 30 years and then i died 30-year career really you're lying 30-year career really i'm an nba player i'm an nba player i'm getting consistent contracts i don't have to worry about you know getting injured running out of money are you kidding me i i'll run my ra goes crazy i'm never gonna be six mvps like i'm i'm i'm you know i'm not gonna be better than michael jordan it's like i may as well be the bench guy for so if you're not gonna be the best you might as well be on with love some stable employment you might as well just have some stable employment chip but not too much yeah you don't want to get a starter role god forbid you say you're the best you say is that what you're saying i'm saying i'm in the mvp conversation like you're in the mvp conversation of what yes like i also have a stream of the year award i think he's in the white boy b league conversation i would i think i would be white boy b or c league yeah because like because like triple s triple s league it's the jack harlow's like that's you know and then we got the a tiered uh white boys which is a who's the a tier it's a great critical uh yeah like no he's a tier he's a tier eight years probably like two hollis two bitch and then b tier i think in a tier along with two hollis you really yeah you think they share a limo together i i don't think they do i think charlie's the one buying the limo it doesn't that's not the point i think charlie's gonna buy the limo put your body on my jeans put your body on my nipples my nipples in your jeans that is a fucking stupid bit what he's talking about he's self-conscious now i've never seen him more eviscerated on this planet earth than let than yet last week when he did the cousin the cousin idea the great cousin experiment and people were taking it so seriously like i think it's fucking i saw it in the discord i'll never forget this and someone in the discord just said flat out i don't know if nick's ever had a good idea wow and nick replied to it and it'd come like i don't know maybe a day before that nick replies to it it's just like come on i said what's your deal he said what's your deal and they didn't respond bro froze bro froze up they do freeze bro froze up when you freeze look i i feel a bit vindicated about what on this show i've been lambasted for giving a little pushback to some of nick's ideas and now the people are finally saying i don't know if nick's ever had a good idea i don't know if nick's ever had a good idea i don't know if nick's ever had a good idea i don't know if nick's ever had a good idea i don't know if nick's ever had a good idea - Have you seen one? - We gotta decide who we're making the show for, man. are we making it for the the my number one show is the yard my number two show is fear and i like both these products equally yeah those people should have are we making it for them i don't think or are we trying to make each other laugh let's decide real shit real shit however when i say i want to have a famous cousin i'm trying to make you laugh ludwig you understand i think you genuinely believe that it's a good idea also see that's the thing i also when you were explaining it i'm like part of me thinks he really does if i don't buy it are we not torn between two worlds it's like i kind of think i want the yard the yard there are 20 xx i fully have given up i'm defeated by both the discord and ludwig in battle i lose i roll up every week and i sit like this and i go how was china ludwig and you tell me and i go whoa it's what you think it'll be a streamer in two years it's what the people who hate us arbitrarily think we actually are like i itch my nuts we're like all just like sucking on his nutsack and like and like shaving it what stream it tucking some under my lip and packing it they do pack my nut packing your fucking nuts yeah god forbid a white boy have a thought on the way to work and try to share it with his fucking co-workers because you know because you know what uh you know what i go to alex and i say uh you if you had a famous cousin who would it be and he fucking snap replies mr bean he said mr mr bean i don't even know mr bean mr bean actual mr bean and i'm like that's a great answer yeah i said i said adam sandler would be mine uh no statue pussy no statue of adam sandler yeah there probably is gonna be one day no there's gotta be like in the rock and roll hall of fame was generational click was not even his top five yeah but they still made like there's gotta be a guy in like somewhere in eastern europe right was there a click video game no no click came out oh six it's like a time control it'd be like it's like a gamecube game where you're pressing a to get him to do the slow motion thing on that woman's boobs yeah that you're saying that doesn't sound awesome i think i would get i put that at the beat here in gc explorers click is one of the few movies to use like a remote that controls people and stops time in a not um pedophile way what do you mean both uses of that why would it be the other example the anime uh the anime remote control dude it's so fucking it's so and you end up on a notepad not to talk yeah i was gonna not to talk about current events but i'm putting my foot down because god forbid we do i'm putting i'm putting my foot down okay if you if you watch the animes with the little girls you don't get to just say it's a cartoon anymore no i don't get to do it's it's there's no more hold up hold up i'm with you you are a fucking chomo no zipper can you pull madoka magica what if why are you getting him to do that i'm just asking a thousand years old that's what i'm saying that's what we always do and we always make excuses for these fucking people tired okay so just tell me right so what are we doing images i'm just asking if puela magi madoka magica would count for this category you're talking if i meet somebody if i if i start a new job and my co-worker says this is his favorite anime i'm like yeah i'm gonna beat the shit out of you after work yeah we're gonna kill you man do that we're gonna beat the shit out of it by the dump we're gonna turn the water up slowly until you don't notice it's boiling i might talk i'd talk to them less it's a good show okay yeah but let me okay why is that when is that ever a good enough reason it's a good show huh you like the show is that ever a good enough reason show it's a great show yeah it's can i tell you the premise could they cross a line for you yes of course what is that line for you um if not already crossed like two scenes or three scenes in the show dan to dan like they cross that shit for sure really yeah i think it's when they i think it's when they started getting a sexual but this show's not sexual okay this show's about actually female empowerment that's awesome again if if the guy who i work with at the restaurant this is my favorite it's a great show if the line cook is like no bro you gotta check out madoka magica after he hit the cart i'm gonna fucking kill that guy i'm not even when i tell you i'm not even fucking with you madoka magica is probably pound for pound a better show for the sopranos yeah i think it probably is better than the sopranos i think it probably beats it out yeah yeah i think it's under better call saul and above the sopranos okay wait i'm i'm your co-worker i'm your co-worker i i i'm telling you about this new hbo show okay it's just like the sopranos live action right but it stars all 14 year old girls what a decision and i'm and i'm a 42 year old man right who's your co-worker at a job and i love this show right it's all about middle school girls cool and i'm just it's my cool it's my favorite yeah and i it's not sexual no it's not sexual it wouldn't be on hbo but it's sexual you know hbo makes great dramas yeah and they're phenomenal actors for their age they got the people from the wire i used to watch i carly that sounds lit yeah because that's like a similar but you think that'd be normal huh yeah i'd be like dude why awesome like maybe i don't fuck i'm not gonna say let's get a beer later yeah you're not why not why not why not i'll probably be busy later all right so that just goes to all co-workers if your main selling point is hbo that's the first one and then this follow-up is 14 year old girls like yeah like because no one says you should watch majoka magica's got 14 year old girl follow-up i'm sure a lot of people have said that to other people and they would be people who i would call illiterate illiterate they're illiterate they have no they have no way to consume media in a in a normal fashion media sensibility yes their sensibility is gone i think it's like i think you should all go home and watch a better it's like imagine i pitched you stranger the stranger things season one stranger things season one except finn 11 year old finn wolfhard is in a maid outfit and it's like is that i mean like am i am i your normal and he's not a normal co-worker still importantly he does not mainly things he doesn't know mainly things he just happens to be wearing a maid outfit for the entirety of the show my favorite character is i guess i'm not normal i'm not a normal guy okay can i well you wouldn't get a beer with ludwig the cool guy at work that you hang out with hey you want to get a beer later dude it's like what are girls allowed to wear like are you gonna freaking outfit police the powerpuff girls now like should they have on like a freaking nun outfit those are superheroes yeah they're wearing capes same with madoka magica it could be fine ludwig it could be fine it is fine i've seen the whole show it's fine a hundred times i had to watch the whole show to make sure everything was everything was on the level every frame also had the manga i think my my issue tends to be when i notice when i meet somebody who watches a show like that yeah and i ask them oh that's great you know it's like i'm sure it could be a good anime whatever it's like what other shows do you watch and then they show me three other shows similar ones right they're very similar what is that and it's not like oh i watched that show and also the sopranos and also like the new season of sex in the city it's on hbo but only when you're homesick from school it's like that zone okay it's the fact that all they watch is shit let me defend myself okay what is it that's about you it's about you it's not no but let me defend them i guess can you pull up k on k hyphen on i've heard k on is good it's a great show it's another show that i really love and i'm asking if if me liking this now i'm all sudden weird so it's about these middle school girls and they're in a band together school of rock right yeah is this a problem because it's not necessarily a problem you know what you know what i think this is what's that i think this is a male centrist point of view and you can't see women as lead characters without a time if these were all eighth grade boys i'd feel the same what if they're eighth grade boys who were dressed you know that's a tough one that he clicked on huh that's a tough one that's a wallpaper probably made by a god download that though like okay i have a question can we delete it by downloading it i think the problem is that there are so many of these shows it's like there's only really one sopranos and then there's a couple other mob shows like boorok empire yeah and it's like a couple because there's a good point here school of rock i'm not having any of these thoughts about somebody who's got no reason i think it's just it's a it's a part of the pattern right it's a part of the oh there's a pattern now there's a pattern if they watch this show then they've probably watched the other one i think another one how about that what if a guy's like yeah my favorite comedies school of rock billy madison role model like everything that features like kids yeah okay with adults and positions of power there's like what if that's all they like it'd be strange and what if you're like well what about knocked up you like that one no not really for me no i don't like the infinite bounds of anime i think that's my problem live action's fine because it's like there's an adult in the room and it's like a human being somewhere these repercussions but with an anime it's infinite they can do whatever i think it's just there's so many there's there are animes that are similar that are sexual and we have to be honest okay we're cracking open it's like oh it's a high school swim team and on the sixth episode they go to the beach also looking and they spend a lot of time looking at the drawn characters boobs whoa whoa whoa let's hey hey nobody cares let's get out of that let's get i may be israeli at a soccer game but episode four is the beach episode they have one yes it's because her parents own a beach cabin so they make it so they don't own that that's the part about making shit up it's probably based off a real life experience the writer in the room all right guys i know we're not making shit up but we're making shit up making this show sexy, but a beach episode could be fun. Everyone's like, yeah we could do that it wouldn't be any my my what i'm wondering is how do you get into this show because you watch episode one you're like i'm just gonna i'll keep watching i'll just make sure it never gets there right like do you have to you have to take a risk well okay so and actually that's a good point madoka magica it takes three episodes because there's three episodes where you would watch it and if you're a 35 year old man you would be like oh i'm a chomo yeah like i pull up and i just start watching it and i look like this yeah imagine my issue that you if you watch the first three episodes on southwest airlines like he would land to be detained by officers if you're the type of guy willing to push past that yeah then i already have a problem with you i don't care what the show's about but most but most i think anime is a show i'm actually on the plane right now i this is i've loaded it up i've side loaded it with a thumb drive right in the airplane's headset and i'm like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god i'm watching it and i'm watching it sub or dub i'm watching it obviously dubbed it's a raspberry pie sorry it's obviously subbed and i'm watching it and i'm like yeah your mouth open yeah my mouth is open and i'm eating little pretzels again would you like any sort of snacks or we're coming through with the cart okay uh do you want she's asleep could you wake her up you know what i'm saying yeah so there's a problem here yeah there'd be an officer waiting for you on the plane right so what are we doing well what you would do is you would at least hit episode four during the plane ride because then everyone'd be like oh i get it really yeah episode four changes everything it changes everything it changes i'm two rows behind in the aisle so i can straight see his ipad that he's watching on he hits episode four on the plane no audio i'm seeing it i'm like the plane goes oh my god i get it and they would walk up to you like sorry i literally thought you were a chomo that looks so awesome yeah isn't it crazy how the glasses make him more dignified but also more showmo like like i believe your character right now yes because when they're off i never would think either of those of you no of course not whoa my god that's an awesome show you should tell me about it yeah i'm gonna fire up the dark knight for the sixth time and on this flight and i'm gonna fall asleep like a fucking normal guy it's good um yeah and and to answer your question there are shows that are just not good you know they that look like that show but but they go there but they go there there's also ones that explicitly go there because it's cartoon so they like feel a license like there's literally like that kind of shit 100 for jerking off which is gross and so it's just all adjacent it is it's all adjacent and so i'm putting my fucking foot down right here right now number one uh i think my my least reasonable trait with this is when someone says an anime is good like when they just say it in passing it to me in my head i think it no it's not yeah i think it's really reasonable that's so awesome yeah i think you should say you should say no it's not it's like like somebody part of me when somebody talks about like the new season of jjk came out i'm like it's dog shit probably yeah and i this is my most toxic train people do by far there is some controversy with the episode four that came out recently so that you're not off on that one but i think that's a bad trade i think it is i think that's actually the best way to i've watched anime i've enjoyed but i still i'm like i think anime is one of the few forms of media that you should go off of what your friend recommends and not like what votes and polls and i agree and why is that maybe because the fan base is so off i think it's because they become obsessive fans and overrated it's just there's never like the hit anime of the season is never about some beautiful 35 year old woman who teaches hold up who teaches classes that's not just adult classes adult classes for adults and it's and her students they're all post-grad post-grad 20 to 30 an anime about phd programs where's the phd anime this exists what is it okay i well does it and does it have a beach episode kaiju number eight okay recent show last season about a 33 year old man uh and uh and on his and and he's a and he's a janitor and he aspires to work in the same industry as his 31 year old classmate who is a powerful woman who leads the army cool okay so all right and that's this is great that's great for adults 33 year old finally cool some anime for adults let me do that yeah finally it took us a while to get here there's adults in it oh that's awesome that's cool that's cool novel there's a what's it called made anime look i'm saying i'm not saying there is okay okay so miss kobayashi's dragon she's actually and i'm not saying sarcastically she's much older than she looks really yeah so this would be like what you're talking about for a younger look huh why not just why can't she be a little bit looking why not make her old why not make her like 25 asian don't raise them well asian don't raise asian don't raise in right yeah asian don't raise yeah is she asian i thought a dragon well i think dragons are mostly asian the anime designing a guy well he's a 35 year old janitor who's also a dragon designing a woman well she looks like she's 12 here here's the issue that kind of defends your argument is there's a lot of mangaka who draw those are people that draw manga okay that draw great shows okay and and you know those shows are the ones that are defensible the ones that maybe include like a middle school girl but it's not in a creepy way then they turn out to be pedophiles ah that happens that happens really that happened a lot for clown in kitchen does it happen a lot it happens enough enough to where you can talk about it and be like that happens is a special country where you can walk into their equivalent of a barnes and noble and and there's a section in there where an octopus you know fucks a whole town an underage town well that's under a town that's interesting japanese barnes infrastructure i'd watch that it's marine biology and interesting politics all this all makes sense and this all makes my theory 100 right what i'm finding what i'm finding is you guys get older the people around me get older you start to coalesce toward it's crazy the ways i think i kind of agree with you is always right and it's shocking to me after this conversation that of the two of you one of you has been deemed brand unsafe unable to appear have you heard about the unable to appear on a stream the very sweet part is that ludwig vouched and he said how do we include slime which i thought was beautiful i would never in a million years have thought he would say that and we can get slime on if slime deletes all of his twitter that was a joke right yeah no that that part that was a joke what i don't think that was a joke that was definitely a joke i don't think that part was a joke they vetted him they wouldn't look no no i'm saying they they didn't like the twitter but i don't think if he deletes it they'd be like oh i see i see basically ludwig was like yeah i think it'd be cool to include my fucking best friend who wears glasses now because he's more mature and watches normal can i can i can i come clean what they didn't actually say no what that initially i wanted you on and then i saw the glasses and i thought it was a bad look so i asked kelby if he could lie to make up a reason to not include you i feel bad now if this all was true it would have happened 10 minutes ago which it fucking did it was a ruse i just got these today but anyway they apparently looked i i got my twitter obviously he's a brand i got my twitter audited and they looked through it this brand and they said no you better you said on twitter that's what i said he's been a fucking fuck off slim slim jim has never sold more product than in the week after this i would argue they have probably with their mr beast collab infinitely more i'm gonna let me read off the last thing i tweeted which was five hours ago and you tell me if this is a brand risk in any way at all this is a fun game just got off the phone with los this is true i was talking to los uh he's hurting real bad right now and y'all need to give him a break he was facetiming me butt ass eating chicken wings in the bathroom which he only does when he's scared we stand with ice yeah yeah the what tell me what part of that me checking in my fucking day one boy and this doesn't is there more context on this and if you're 90 percent of people listening right now who has no idea what he just said that's just don't don't you live a you live a good happy life yeah yeah yeah good luck i'm just saying there's an associate out there who fucking puts on dope top to bottom top to bottom top to bottom throw the whole thing hold on let me just read some replies maybe you know what the first one that's on me yeah i shouldn't do that but i reply i replied to los i said it's all good los we stand with you bro sometimes i think about how me and my sister would make a good couple lol so like what what's the problem everything's in order what's the problem let's agree your questions what is the problem everything's in order here like what should you have said differently to be more maybe brand friendly i just want to like Like, I love brands. You guys know this. I know this about you. Yeah, I do know that about you. Blood Light gets me all sorts of twisted and I start thinking about my sister different. I'm not thinking about her different. It's just like, we have so much in common. That's like what you're saying. It would just make sense from like a utility. Like, if I just met her on the street, I'd be like, damn, you're perfect for me and you're beautiful. It makes sense. Like, if you didn't have the context of her being. Then we could watch fucking Los Pollos TV together, dude. You're sounding like a guy who watches a lot of anime right now. Well, all right, fine. Let me read this last one. Tell me if this is a problem. And if it is, and if you're honest with me, I will shut up forever. Okay, okay. I say, I reply to him because he's getting dog power, bro. And I said, bro, fuck the haters, dude. Don't let woke muzzle you. We love what ICE is doing and we are chomos. Hashtag chomo nation. Hashtag Los Pollos chomo squad. Hashtag Wingstop partner. Yeah, it's the three little pigs, but all houses are made of straw. Like, what do you want? So you're saying that's a problem. He deleted the tweet. Because I think it raised you. You blew the house down yourself. Fine. So you think all of that's clean. That's good game, boy. I'm just saying, it's like, yeah, bro. Like, this is America, bro. Yeah. Okay. That's all. We're not going to get any sponsors on fucking this show. We're never going to get sponsors. To be clear, this wheel is in all their sponsors, man. We've lost a bunch. We've lost what? We've lost two. Two. We've lost two. And one of them was Nick's fault. We've had to do so many. Which one was my fault? Which one was Nick's fault? Gun. Gun me? Wasn't that you? I feel like you're the guy who brought the gun in the room. Dude, you fucking fired it. A bunch. You dry fired that gun in my nuts. We lost two sponsors. We've had to do so many free make goods. We've done a lot of make goods over the years. This is also, we've gotten warnings from several partners. Last year, last year was our worst year in ad revenue ever because we lost those sponsors and we did like five make goods. Fucking worth it. It's not. I didn't. But like, I. I love brands so much. These are not my fault. If you look at the actual data, it's bro. They just saw. If these sponsors just saw how much you love the brand. If they saw, that would be beautiful, bro. To be clear, I'm cool with it. Like, I don't mind. I know. Hey. I don't mind losing all these partners like flies on this show. You do. No, no, don't. I know how much this one pays. On the show he said. No, no, no, no. This one. We do care, Ludwig. We do care about this partner. I said on the show. You're not listening to me. On this show? He said, yeah. He said it. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I don't blame you, bro. And I know that I will be the, here's the thing. I can be your righteous arm of truth. Right. Okay. What's that mean? When you need to be safe. Right. You tell me what you need. And in a way, you can think of me as whatever I say is like a secret mouthpiece for Ludwig. The secret mouth for you? Arm of truth is the secret mouth. It is. Thank you so much. And I can use that mouth whenever. And you can use that mouth anytime you want it. All right. For brands even. You can have it all. So. We can do brand integrations with the secret mouth of truth. I'm using my secret mouth for you. I can't believe. My secret mouth keeps me connected to my favorite brands. Like Hungry Lute. My. I'm getting so hungry and only one mouth needs to be fed. It's the secret mouth of truth. It's a secret. Yeah. No, it's okay. I appreciate that. You like that? Red Bull for my secret mouth. My secret mouth needs it now. My secret mouth needs it to survive. Zipper, can you pull up the thing I said in the group chat? We've been doing this show for. So long. I'm going to get to your little secret mouth. I told you I was going to grab his waist in the workplace earlier. I told Aiden that. He told me that. I threatened him with it. Yeah. I said I'm going to grab that waist in the fucking workplace later, dude. Can you stop this? At a random time. You're the boss, bro. You're the boss of this. This is a great graphic. I wanted to know where y'all are sitting. I'm obviously sitting between two girl presence. I know, dude. I was the same. You're taking middle seat? I've been a crush on girl preso for a long time. I'm going five every day of the week. If you're not picking three, I don't know what the fuck you're thinking, bro. I'm going five. I'm in between Nick Yingling, Travis Kelsey. I'm pulling up the I-beer phone. Yeah, here's my question. You're in five with a lot of coloring books. I'm doing I-beer phone like this and they're both going. Dude. Here's my question. You're in row five. The plane goes down. Yeah. Who are you putting the mask on first? Uh, myself, brother, because I listen. That's a good answer, bro. You passed the test. That's a good fucking answer. You passed the test. You passed the test. What's the worst seat? Uh, the worst seat is probably- Well, according to what we were just talking about, it'd be next to, it would be number two. The worst seat's eight. Can we be real? The worst seat is eight. What? She's fine. It's not her. That's the problem. Yeah, you're right. Do I look like that? I mean, you're separated between Aiden and- If I look like that, I think I agree. I think the worst seat's four. Four is, I think- This is shoes off slime. Oh, right. Oh, the shoes are off. Yes. That's actually a good point. They're in the overhead, though. There's a graphic there. Yeah. That's fine. You'll smell them. His feet, bro. His feet. My feet don't smell. Kill yourselves. I've said this before. And we clearly struck a nerve there, so let's rewind. Let's rewind. Because I've had to say it so many times. And people with good smelling feet usually blow up like that. Yeah, they usually blow. They usually freak out crazy like that. It's so, it's so fucking disgusting the way you twist the words of an honest man. Uh, I would, I would say four and then three because that shit would get me banned from FAA. I'm probably like this. Boom. Both sides. And I'm full grip. Yuck. Full grip in three. You're full gripping on the plane, bro? With girl prez. And then, and then alternate timeline you is in the bag eating nachos like what the fuck? Yup. Uh huh. Like look at him. He's fucking- One might be the worst scene in the house. Like I get an air dome. One is a messy fucking scene. One's gross, man. One is so gross, bro. Cause you're like, where did he get those? One is definitely- Did he bring those from the movies? I think the eye test from the aisle, like I'm walking down the aisle on a real plane, one is the worst because it's like, this guy's eating nachos. Dude, we're watching a fucking, watching a fucking Batman eating nachos. You're using the middle seat for your food, bro. That's crazy. Your fingers are covered in cheese. Cheese everywhere, dude. Because I'm sharing with the person of the lucky contestant to enter seat one. Dude, you literally have it on your fingers. Look at it. It's so gross. Yeah. Because I was just like, do you want some? How else am I going to give it to them? You can suck it right off. Do you want? Lick this off my fingers right now. Suck it right off. You're trying to grab my waist with the cheesy fingers. It's disgusting. I won't say it. Aiden on planes. He does take the window seat and he just kind of balls up in the corner. So eight actually might be a play. Cause then you just get to hang out with Leslie and you get to be, you get to ask Aiden about his favorite. I would also, I could lean over and talk to you too. I guess you do get access to aisle Ludwig. I'd lean over. I'd be like, Hey, the speaks one is interesting because you must bring a friend. It seems there's two seats to choose. You just get to pick. No, you just get to pick window. I mean, speaks is a good one because he only likes window aisle. There's a choice. That's probably what I'm picking. Yeah. This is, yeah. I mean for, I would like for more if I was window, I can bow out if I want to. I don't like that. I'm forced to be in the dynamic. Yeah. Yeah. Well that I think, I think that's the sacrifice you make is like, you cannot turn this, this TV off. Yeah. Right. So you better like the show that you're watching. Um, but this is a great thought experiment. I think this is a great, great home and let us know at home where you would sit now and I'm playing with us. And nine's not a bad option. So don't be mean. Dude. I brought, I sent you guys this proper message me and cause he saw this graphic and he was like, why is the trash next to Ludwig? And I said, he uses a garbage wag when he travels instead of like luggage. He said, what's his reasoning. And I said that it's easy or something. We tell him it's insane. We tell him he's insane all the time and he asked how. And I said, you're starting to pull on the thread that we've been trying to pull on for years. Cracked the case. Why the fuck open? And I'm, that's the thing is I'm your boy. But this is a one way fucking street these days cause I just go to bat for you when you're fucking irrational and you got some, I'm like, I go to bat for you and guess what you fucking do, bro. I don't even want to say it. It makes me sick. I sent this conversation West coast to the group chat. That's my famous cousin Ludwig says it fits things easier, cumbersome shapes, unfolded clothes. It's a malleable container. I can tell he's in an Uber right now cause he's responding. Yeah. Aiden says it breaks when Mac book in there though. And then Ludwig said betas make their affairs fit in defined shapes. Alphas. But their affairs dictate the shape. Wow. Bro. And then Nick said, Santa figured this out thousands of years ago. That's the fucking smoking gun conversation because you think Santa Claus rolls up with a bunch of fucking Pelicans cause they're not ready for that conversation, bro. He literally has a glorified trash bag. Yes. It's a more stable bag, slightly more stable, but not really compared to glad. Would you appreciate and respect him more if he had some sort of canvas bag? Yes. If Ludwig was bringing a large Christmas sack on the plane with him, I would be like, wow, that's such a good idea. I'd get a Christmas sack. I zipper. I mean, do we pull it up already? The picture of me from 2016? That was your bag on planes. I'd respect it. But instead you bring, you bring a hefty garbage bag that has a hole in it because your Mac book airs corner has broken it open. It's a hole in it. It's probably not hefty. It's probably glad. Yeah. Just to be crystal hefty would not have a hole. And I've put my Mac book in several times and it never fucking rips though. Mac book. We did on the last trip. We went on a little hole, but the Mac book didn't fall out, but there was a hole. There's a hole. My clothes have to breathe. Dude. You can't just leave. It'll get moisture. We'll get trapped in there. Um, can you look top? I'm right. You're right. I'm fucking down. I don't know if it's a week or a month, but, uh, uh, there was, there was a picture that I posted from the 2016, 20, 26 trend and it was me in 2016 traveling to Genesis, uh, with a bag, I was running the same method. But instead of using a trash bag, used a pillowcase run up my mom yeah i do think it's for all like to give you evil credit you really actually have always been like this it's kind of like how i sleep on the floor still like you can't take the trailer park out of the boy and your trailer park is carrying around a bag arbitrarily dude your eyes are crazy bro so i thought you had my back and shit right is it because of the stress of the bag like it's it's the fucking iphone flips it dude it's so insane that it's actually like but if you flipped it it would just be on the other side yeah but my head's also fucking obviously tilted i i love the cameras it's great man you still got the bag you still a page fan i'm saying i'm saying what what i'm saying is this is better than trash bag where did that smile go can i talk about that you lost it bro you've not felt joy that is just pure ageing you can't say that why what'll happen because it was going to investigate it's supposed to be between us oh no the hr guy touched me that's why i'm quiet he could fire me he could but he won't because there's a power dynamic yeah there's a power dynamic over you uh actually so much and the pleasure you gave me that night oh yeah you took it you'll always have it over him it's so volatile what you guys do you cast a spell with your mind and your body this game you will play of cat and mouse it's dangerous i want you to know that it's sick that we play it and it's a game we'll keep fucking playing but yeah dude some joy has left your heart i noticed that yeah i watched the old i watched i recently watched one of slime's old salty ice climber videos okay and i was watching all these clips for you and there was just a wonder that i've never i haven't seen since back then he's too stressed these days when he goes when he goes anthony anthony he's trying to tell you something on stream he yelled for you he yelled for my government he yelled for your government you wanted something for his government there was just a joy joyous spirit in that and what happened to him um the money changed him the money for sure changed me bro and i'm hoping to switch up more i remember a long time ago at smash camp when ludwig first started streaming he was talking to duke vitro and duke features again just bought a maserati and ludwig was like i'm gonna buy one too me too and it was like i and i i heard this i was like no you're not i didn't say anything because you said me too actually i don't remember this that's really funny i know and maybe i was referring to the movement it was around the same era i probably wasn't interested in the maserati bro he's been stressed i told i said on wednesday he doesn't reply to me i said you're stressed out bro i can tell hit a hakuna matata one time it works i don't know if he did or not i didn't because i didn't know how to hit a hakuna matata you say it it means nowhere so you just go hakuna matata well right let it wash over you bro hakuna matata let me wash you with a sponge let it wash over you he left the office that day just so damn stressed out i wanted to wash all the stress off him i wanted to hose you down i have no stress in my heart i'm a stressless individual and i want it soapy you don't talk about a high stress individual buddy look in the mirror those minecraft friends are taking a toll on you damn politic here i'm bringing a politic he bitched you bro he bitches me in chat bro he'll say the most mean shit of all time in my chat while i'm just like trying to fucking figure it out he was like you see the last death i had and i was like nah i didn't see death 49 of 50 oh dude it was fucked up literally it did there was an actual bug where it doesn't load in right and the lava like spawns behind you even though you've been there for a while okay it was really interesting and everyone was like okay actually genuinely on luck you're terrible at the game but genuine on luck sorry for your loss load up another one pig and i did it's been fun i like the game but it's hard it's funny to watch and play because what kind of player is he well most of the information that he's getting is real-time information from chat and so it's like a lot of what he's doing is discerning what information is real or not and at a certain point chat is trying to be helpful but other times they just want him to die because they want him to experience it so two things i have believed up until this point i found out yesterday were wrong one that copper helmet will stop skeletons from getting mad at you uh oh my god okay zipper laugh it's the hardest i've ever heard him laugh really fun number two is that every netherite block you mine in the nether has a small chance to just be lava instead i don't even think i would believe that one i remember stranger things have happened when i first played the game with atriok i convinced you was a hand warming animation and so i told him to do it over lava he just threw his shit oh my god bro that was awesome so yeah i'm kidding but i i'm very cautious i can tell because now i've been around and now i know sometimes i know what's right and what's wrong yep but you've been in fortress you've been in bad you've been all sorts i've been freaking all sorts of places and then i found a woodland mansion and i had the best run of my whole entire career and i wanted to go inside and then everything went wrong but it was probably the funniest shit that's ever happened uh uh no it's a true treat to watch you explore so it was fun but i like it it's great once i saw the big fucking chicken i was just like what happened to minecraft not not in a bad way just like when did i when did i not see all this shit change like literally over the past 10 years 10 years yeah like woodland mansions is not a recent update everyone knows this uh everyone who's played it within the last 10 years for more than an hour yeah maybe at least at least notch still owns it because no i mean thank god wait what but he has the candy room notch doesn't own it anymore guys microsoft bought it wait i mean they probably like hired him or something right because he was like he was kind of the face of the game like everybody liked him he was like he kind of i don't know what i like about notch he never shares his personal beliefs oh it's straight to the point i'm a dev and i'm a game i love keeps kept it simple face you know kanye apologized recently do i saw i saw bro turning a new he's i know what i'm not sure like wait he's like me too yeah uh you know what i think we all just say you know what kanye i think we should all tweet tomorrow oh it's a school walkout i think we should say kanye we forgive you the kanye we forgive you school walkout yeah for k k through six also don't the nene challenge don't let your teacher see you nene stand up and nene if you get caught you lose you get caught you lose it's the k through 6 nene challenge the grade 7 through 12 can you steal dougie challenge we forgive you fundraiser that's actually what the rockathon is going to be it's the kanye we forgive you couldn't think of a cause so yes there's no there's no horrible thing that's happening in america right now that we can really think of but finally a positive note the rockathon for kanye's cure no the rock the rockathon for kanye's apology to spread awareness of the apology and and we take all the proceeds but we'll really spread that apology around make sure it's heard you've been using rocket money a lot i use rocket money literally like every day that's so crazy it's like the it's the absolute best tool for like aggregating all your different accounts in one place i'm not kidding it is it just is wait so i it just is i really no bullshit guys i didn't even know we were going to read it rocket money it's just i'm not even reading the rocket money it's so good it just talks about it off the show it's just the best fucking way to get all your different credit cards accounts in one place and see all of it at one point and just fucking it really is how do we make this uh and and the and rocket money pays for monkeys to fight i just straight up like the product i just fucking like the well it's a it's a personal finance ad that helps fines and cancels your unwanted subscriptions monitors your spending and helps lower your bill so you can grow your savings nick it's all of that it does all of that it's all of that it does all of that you should just use it you should just use it can we i'm not fucking kidding what's the gag yeah like what's the joke that we usually there's no gag this one is just no time it's just good i use it i am because usually it's like yeah we do the read and it's like fine i am surprised that you are don't know what sometimes you get fucking spade of spade you know what i mean you can also use it to check your credit all your subscriptions in one place which is cool they're not even telling me to say it's true you can see everything in one place aiden it's you know why is it so hard to see everything in one place actually realizing is i think maybe the brands that we work with are just getting paid because nick uses their services like they just know he's just a whale for rocket money you sleep on the mattress you you use rocket money all that by the way this is still the rocket money ad help you reach your financial goals faster you can join at rocket money.com slash the yard back to the episode well aiden is gonna pick the charity that um he he won from the 10k challenge in the 10k challenge oh you won it yeah was it a year it was a year of buying ten thousand dollars worth of socks whoever makes the most in the year gets to pick the charity goes to aiden's i think entire portfolio went up like 50 yeah hey well done man you're a really talented investor thanks man it's because i'm smart i'm lucky i've won one stock is 90 of his income no all you need is one it was even all you need is one what do we do really did well one did so well they're all good picks what was the one that did well uh tmc the metals company tiny meat club the fucking cody co podcast you better you bet long on cody co you bet long and that shit You're fucked up for that It paid out dividends bro I hope Cody Co. prospers so I get some money He makes great videos No he's an unethical investor because I put all my shit in UNH You know like healthcare companies that are helping people That's right healthcare companies also is cutting edge crypto Yes And the charity is down with Noel Miller I'm kidding Noel Miller slandered me We want to bring Cody back And get rid of Noel Miller I need to update y'all I need to update y'all He's gone too now Yeah the podcast is over He's doing his own shit Not because of any sort of misgivings Woke hasn't come for him Until now Until me I'm coming for him He's over And then Cody back on top With the $19,000 we raised It's over You better say your Fucking Prayers dude Alright so you won So what is it He's going to pick the charity Oh have you picked it I have my top candidate But a bunch of people sent me suggestions And then you have been dodging So the loser was supposed to run through Wall Street literally in Manhattan In a business suit The loser was meant To run a 5k in a business suit With a briefcase On Wall Street Wall Street was brought up as a location Now I I actually just discovered recently That Wall Street's in New York It's in New York City Because I always referred to the Wall Street of the West San Jose, California Right That makes sense I can get that confused Right He's like how can I get on a 45 minute flight And So this has come As you would have guessed As a shock to me A shock A shock to my system Of course They're like yeah it's good in New York I'm like what Because I already booked my flight to San Jose Oh no With the charity proceeds That's like $110 That's like $110 No no I got first with the charity proceeds It was like $700 So It's like what am I supposed to do Like I can't get the money back for the charity I said no refunds I said no to the fucking Interesting It's like $100 You don't have the funds to do that Well I could tap into more of my charity funds But I only made like a couple k Ludwig was dodging this part of the bet By the way So we made it We called it out On lemonade stand To be clear Hold up hold up And we also I dodged it The day after I lost They made this episode Like They gave me 24 hours And then they made Because you pre-jacked it He pre-jacked that he wouldn't do it To be clear You've basically only been saying You're not gonna do it Exactly So the comments What do you want them to do Give me an example How I dodged it The comments across like Ludwig's subreddit His shorts His YouTube videos Our yard episodes Are like Do not let Ludwig forget That he has to do this And Ludwig texted me He said By the way Did your podcast Happen to mention the 5k bet Getting a lot of comments And I said Oh well Yeah We did a clip And he said Why does a fledgling podcast Attack a working class Chinese man And guess And guess what No reply What Oh you had nothing to say Well the cat got your tongue No I said You're so snatched now You'll run it so quick and fast Okay Here's the deal I Don't get it Because it is a fledgling podcast And it is It gets like A fraction of the viewership Of my video I'm surprised anyone even Commented from You know what I mean Like It's interesting They found the podcast It's so clear It's so clear That it's bought it To some degree People like my podcast Because No one Well people If you count Yeah Like chat robots The listener Guys I'm here I got to the ads I'm here Finally Now what product Are we looking at today It was my birthday During ad seven If anyone wants to And then they hold their breath again Because they have to pause To write how they feel About the ads I'm going back underwater I'll see you guys At minute 20 This weekend I flew To Baltimore To interview The mayor of Baltimore For Lemonade Stand And the person That helped Set this up Was Like The mayor's Comms guy He listens To Lemonade Stand And he helped Get us connected And get this interview Or he was the contact We got introduced to This whole time It's just been like Normal back and forth Getting this ready We do the episode Day of He shows up a bit early And he's shaking Hands around the room Like meeting everybody The comms director And he shakes my hand And just goes Doctor And then moves on To the next person Wow Dude it's some Hail Hydra shit And I was like No way Whoa So he's not a fucking LS pedo He's a goddamn Yard shag He's a yard patriot Yes Dude patriots in control Wow So many of our fans Are now growing up And entering the real Actual workforce And the government And patriots are in control Yes And we can send We can send the word Whenever we want We need to You guys need to Apply for ICE And do some real Inside damage What's our sleeper Agent word It shouldn't be It's doctor Doctor He's holding up the three And Aiden's like The medical field Is kind of harder To figure out Doctor just comes up A lot though Yeah Yeah but he's What is he calling him Nine dogs Yeah Yeah alright I am the I am the ninth dog It's like in The call sign Like one battle After another It's like How many dogs Will it take It's like nine dogs Will take care of each other And you have to say it Completely right in the bathroom I don't I don't remember How many dogs I don't remember How many fucking dogs I want to find my daughter No seven Eight I don't know That's not the amount of dogs That take care of each other Yeah okay I love this This makes me happy Patriots are in control Patriots are in control Patriots And we'll hold control We have to hold control We have to hold control Because that's what Keeps this country together Dude you should play Metal Gear Solid 3 Aiden Please Aiden please Aiden please Aiden There's a nice silence And then we could have Spun a wheel Of things Slime says No you don't get it And we just We hit a spot on the wheel Yeah yeah My old handsome friend Metal Gear After World War 1 In the Metal Gear universe After World War 1 All the world leaders Got together And they had a giant Slush fund worth of billions Called the Philosopher's Legacy Right And then they became What's called the Patriots Over a hundred years And they control everything But they're actually AIs It's crazy He predicted everything You would love this shit If you just gave it a chance Why don't you give it a chance? Why do you not give it a chance? I have to finish The Diablo 4 campaign Why? Oh I'll see you guys In four fucking years The guy can't even beat Breath of the Wild Boss 1 What are we doing? I'm on the fourth Divine Beast That's awesome That's insane That game came out A decade ago You are averaging Less than one Divine Beast A year David Charm Was playing that shit On a Wii U That game is Oh my god The game won game of the year In 2017 Yeah I'm going at a rate of 0.6 Divine Beasts A year There's four Did any of you guys Watch the Alex Honnold thing? Yeah dude Dude That shit was awesome Yeah but it's spawning A bunch of fucking Dipshits Who've never climbed before Tell them bro It's spawning people Who haven't climbed? Tell them bro Cause it got A lot of views And it's like A lot of people's Introduction to climbing Really? But they're all Urban climbers now? So not even They're all like They're all like This is the most Fucking insane climb I've ever seen Matt Walsh is dumbass If you tell This is the most Insane Athletic performance Ever captured on camera And it's like This is not even Alex Honnold's most impressive Athletic performance It's not even It's Torish 400 It's Torish Like functionally Isn't this like a really Easy climb for him to do? It's a damn cakewalk It's like walking On flat ground Really? For real? Actual? Yes I didn't know The risk was so close To zero for him You should go watch Free Solo Have you seen Free Solo? I don't If you guys play Metal Gear Solid 3 Snake Eater I'll watch fucking Free Solo That's high Let me find that clip I'll watch it the amount Of times it takes For you to play And not the opposite way We can just play that For an hour and a half No you have to finish Free Solo 20 times You have to learn About the philosopher's legacy What was crazy Is he got to the top Of the building And And it pans To the inside You see all these people At the top Like pointing at him As he climbs over The final part And the guy Commentating The whole thing Is Mark Roper Oh yeah yeah He was there Yeah What the hell Was that about? Why was Mark Roper Commentating it? That's crazy I don't know Two that could get I guess You know what was crazy Is that They flashed his abs For a second Dude Can you look up Alex Honnold abs? He is unbelievable He is ripped bro They look Bro They look insane He was like Climbing up in his windies So And it picked it up The wind just picked up His fucking shirt And he looked fucking awesome It's like a Marilyn Monroe shot It's like CG's But you could put Molten lava through them Yes Yes Yes That's so sad Cast iron CG's Damn I can't find it Pull up a CG's zipper Alex Honnold's cum gutters Oh no no no While climbing Taipei Dude you're asking a lot Yeah it'll come up Abs While climbing Taipei 101 This is not gonna Well yeah he spelled it Tapet Tapet And it's not part of the mainland Some will help you bro Some things are better left to the imagination I think My zipper bro Oh my god Look at my zipper I'm going to jail Look at my zipper bro I'm not gonna be in Minecraft For the next 45 fucking minutes Can you look up that clip Of Alex Honnold Almost slipping Not in this climb It's a It's a different climb Yeah it's that one It was the image that we saw Yeah yeah The third one Right there Look at this clip He has He has Oh it's What a terrible clip Terrible short The slip is off camera I mean that Wait I want to see it It was so scary enough I'm gonna see it i'm about to see it no it already happened it was the stutter shake yeah but it was just off camera his like foot slips oh what a terrible format he's dead if if his hand let's go here's the here's what i'm here's what pisses me off about alex honnold and there's a lot of there's a lot of debate about how he's told his wife that if he dies his daughter wouldn't even be sad because she's not old enough yet yeah so what he has doesn't have social contexts and he just likes to climb so what right my thing is why doesn't he make it harder and climb greased and climb what grease like look at this shit like slippery he's all chalked up that's confusing because he said climb grease and i thought he meant the nation maybe it is just off camera so i guess the question every guy goes the question i have for you is then slime is do you think it's more impressive for him to climb something easier but making it more difficult and dangerous with grease or climbing something more difficult but like doing everything you can to achieve it but here's the thing here's what i'll say he needs shoot shut the fuck up bro we should grease him and then he should climb something if you want if you're the guy who can't get your fucking dick hard in the morning unless you're doing crazy shit like climbing buildings and awesome walls then i don't want know why you don't make it crazy harder and grease up okay here's the thing he's already making it crazy harder he's not using a rope that's the thing but he's chalked he's chalked he's chalked like he has chalk make sure his grip is a little bit weird so you that's just signing up to die he's not gonna die no one dies he would free solo climbers die do you know what the the movie the alpinist is oh no a fictional dramatization with adrian brody because he has to open the can of fucking vegetables it's a conspiracy here's the deal bro nobody fucking died oh 33 accidents 11 were fatal from free soloing since the 50s 11 no that's only the flat irons in colorado that's a flat iron 11 out of 33 accidents there were three free solo deaths in socal alone i'm just saying bro it's like i'm not impressed you're not impressed would you be more impressed if he played volley bear in a challenger lobby and won if his hands were greased yeah what if they weren't greased and they're chalked typical alex okay typical alex alex honnold just rushing dusk and dawn i mean how many people are able to free solo like taipei but also win a challenger game i dude that's what i'm saying i mean sancho's pretty ripped now maybe he could sancho might be the first at climbing though i'll tell you what yeah oh no he couldn't put it together he's a little scaredy cat okay show me no he can't get there then he can't do it you get there though he's pretty strong i'm just i just want i watch stuff like that you guys are saying to me that's not even this most impressive shit and i'm saying let's fucking grease that nasty pig dude okay i think i think a greased up alex honnold with a rope climbing would be interesting i'm behind i'm trying to catch him i'd watch that oh and i'm like i can't get you you're so slippery bro you're on like one of those like tents that they pitch like halfway up the yeah i'm like come on climb past me it's alex honnold free soloing but us three have bow and arrows or us for a bone arrows like it's minecraft yeah yeah and we're skellingtons and we're trying to knock does alex honnold have a copper helmet on you guys have a copper helmet yeah so we kiss you know yeah that wouldn't be really entertaining dude stop i'm scared but any single hold could just reveal lava well it would be more like an orlando if you think about it okay explain the archers yep and they knock you off those bows are crazy they're great bows some chutzpah to them okay it's alex honnold one great bow one and orlando archer and his kids are watching but it doesn't matter because they won't remember because they're so young then aiden and yingling are ornstein smell okay i like that you guys dude you guys should do that for halloween ornstein god that'll be awesome tough as fuck dude have you played dark souls one no yeah never mind look up ornstein smell after diablo or are you an a-track for lemonade sand wow wait double ornstein really wow i mean smell i fucked it up double smell it's hard to know which one's which i don't blame you for that i think i would make fun of right now i don't even get it atrioc told someone in the office he's like oh yeah i drive the uh the honda fit and i under my voice was like interesting and he heard it he's just like shut up it's it's really getting to him and i like it it's been so funny because ari keeps adding more stickers to his car and he's like to the back of the car and they share it so like just just recently i was looking and it says number one bug collector on the back and like she's just random shit yeah yeah she just keeps adding new ones his shit looking like the uh the yard sign that says like uh science is real in this house and black lives matter yeah and women's rights are human rights i should start just getting stickers and throwing them on y'all's cars what no what i'd be the dog dog shit he wrote i'm a pedophile into mine i did i did do that on the back of your dirty window dog shit if i put coexist on your car a really good message and you put i'm a co-exist with the blue line through it yeah and the x is not it's a punisher logo oh he would do coexist on my car and i put the one that says fiction fucking what's up dog what's up you believe in my car sky yeah on your and i got i got fox racing fuck it but pride colors okay color fox racing takes up the whole window can't see shit i'm doing uh for nick um i'm gonna kiss you if you don't think fast enough he's gonna kiss you dog i would just put baby on board i want people to treat you a little safer i like that bro what would he's fucking screaming 90 down to 30 you know how he does baby on board on the right student driver on the left i have a dui on the bumper that's a guy with so many so many weapons someone getting closer to read them all and like backing up as they get the context pregnant and hungry oh a bitch pregnant and fed and it's like it's like one's blue one's pink and we're like a couple i want to experience pregnancy hunger one time yeah you want to experience pregnancy hunger one time yeah you want to experience pregnancy hunger one time yeah you want to experience pregnancy hunger one time yeah you want to eat like chalk or you want to crave chalk yeah like something crazy because like the baby inside me is going insane i want sardines and motor oil yeah that yeah they blame it on the baby but it's just them no it's just them they're always blaming it on the oh the babies make me want to start you just want to eat fucking sardine but what is but they don't want to do that normally no they low-key oh i think they low-key do because oh no i think they're actually releasing their inhibitions to actually eat what they want to eat feel the right which is yeah my my health teacher in high school told me it's because like their bodies can like sense what nutrients they're deficient in this is kind of what this is and they're like oh i need all that right now and i need and their body is like yes you want that thing you want it you want it like but then i was kind of on my head i my first daughter's like well then like kind of like how's advil know where the pain is like how does their body know what then what's in that yeah and why does their body like because i don't know what's in a pickle chalk uh he was like i don't know what's in a pickle iron or some shit i don't remember what it was and we know that shit sort of apparently our bodies can sense it the problem is that we are allowing women to lie while they're pregnant when we shouldn't be i think that's the one time they're allowed they should be standing all the time they should be for they should be heavily disincentivized from lying by crime uh punishment i think they should get half off of factor meals they're pregnant i think they shouldn't have to be the ones boxing the factor meals when they're pregnant well factor has some employees to replace yeah dude i saw this video of like a guy like this chinese guy in a factory who like paints like he put he like does metal working or something and it's a really shitty job and he's wearing like a mask and he just looks like a silver man and i'm like that should be a pregnant woman right right yeah like that's like put them to work get them that's how i free up the silver man that's how i felt when i watched that video of the the the guy in china who's like testing 50 vapes a second on the line that could be a pregnant woman that could be so we gotta think of best pregnant women jobs yeah um that's our next tier list for when ludwig's gone okay i the best pregnant women jobs tier list yeah i will say i'd click on that i want to do it bad i'd be like i'd be like what do they have to say and we all have to bring 30 jobs i do think this one is the i think aiden's right i sent i sent the clip just to take it a little a little reminder is that we can pull it up what of the of the vaping clip because i do think it's number one i think it's s tier what's funny is the pregnant women are on the way to having the hardest job in the world which is being a mother if you think about it so what if i'm the kid i think but here's the deal if the if the mother is the hardest job to have on the world then they should be able to do any job beneath it right yeah so i don't understand so do i get do i get this product with this guy's fucking mouth on it no he's testing the products in the line he looks gone dude this is this is what my fucking yasuo is doing this has to be a joke this isn't real this is unironically cam on tip to tip oh my god It was going to be us and Macau. Did they really change TikTok? You're the one that uses it. Yeah, I can't even upload a video on TikTok. It's all fucked up. America finally has a majority sharing it. Well, they sold the company, right? It's all fucked up, and I can't even upload a video. I can't upload the FaceTime of me talking to Lois while he's butt-ass in that bathroom eating chicken wings. I uploaded one yesterday. It has zero views, and I think it's just unlisted. I think you just. Guy who fell off. You just have no motion, man. It's so weird. It just has zero views. I used to get the views, and now I don't. And then I uploaded one today. It has 78 views. 78? Hey! Wait, you got 78 views only, actually? That's good for you, man. I have one zero and one 78, yeah. And then I uploaded the same time. That was an hour ago. I uploaded the same time on Instagram. It was like, got 80K. Damn! And it doesn't make sense. Wow. It doesn't make sense. They're trying to silence you, bro. They're trying to silence the people talking about fucking ice. Well, you need a pregnant woman to buy TikTok. We need a pregnant. That, dude. I think that's an easier job, though. Running TikTok? Yeah. Easier than what? Than the vape job, or being a mother. The person who puts aglets on shoelaces. Like, these are way harder jobs. The editor for Lemonade Sand. Oh, my God. Imagine. Might as well be fucking AI. Listen to the whole fucking thing, bro. Might as well be fucking Doug Doug robot AI. It's. The people they've brought on are untrustable. Mm-hmm. Uncrustable. Brandon Mayor Scott. Brandon Mayor Scott. That's the guy who made the national anthem. Yeah. Yeah, when he was in that castle. Mm-hmm. Thought he was gonna die. And then he decided to sing a song for his country. The ramparts didn't fall that day. Patriots in control. Never forget that LS pussy. Mayor of Baltimore, super nice to meet you. Is it pink? Because I am hearing this. Many people are wondering if. If. If it's in fact pink. Is it a man or a woman that's the mayor of Baltimore? A man. I knew this before asking that. Nobody is. Nobody is. Well, what did Brandon Scott say? Nobody is asking Brandon Scott that. What was your most hard-hitting question? My most hard-hitting question? Dude, did you put the feet to his fires? You don't care. You don't fucking care, bro. I don't really like that. No, we care. You guys don't care about shit. No, we care. Hey, guys, we care. Shit, I do care so much. You guys think I do. Yeah, I get it. You guys think I go over to the other podcast and I do shit. I do gay shit with my gay friends and I fucking. Yeah, you're strange. And there's nobody. And Perry just beats off instead of filming anything. And Perry's a. Perry's a name I know. A guy I know. We kiss each other and do TurboTax ad reads and then we wish. We wish we were doing them from Netanyahu or something. Dude, he's. He's nailing me to the wall right now. I don't know what to say. It's just fine. That's what you guys think we fucking do. I am genuinely curious how your conversation with Brandon Scott went. You don't give a shit. Because, honestly, the only way I'll ever find out about it is if you tell me because I'm sure you didn't record his audio. Okay? So, I would just like to hear. Where it stings, bro. I would just like to hear it. Totally. Did this happen? Yes, dude. Aiden did three interviews with people. Venezuela. who lived in Venezuela. Oh, no. And he didn't record their audio. Girl. So, it's just Aiden going like, mm-hmm. Oh, wow. Girl. Dubbed by Mr. Beast. Did you like Maduro? Did you transcribe it at least? Yeah, surprise. They didn't like him. And then he'd be like, look, can you hold that thought? Can I tell you about TurboTax for a second? Sorry, I have to do this one. It's called B2B. You guys are fucking. You know what? You did have that Netanyahu birthday cake, which I thought was weird. Yeah, that was weird. You guys keep me down. This is going to be my year. Whoa. 2026 is going to be my year. Year of the Aiden. On this show. Aiden, let me tell you something. On other show. It's Aiden's year. It can't be your year because Patriots are in control. Mm-hmm. Okay? Mm-hmm. So you're going to fall in line. Yeah, dude. And he has glasses now. Or you're going to find out what happens. That contractor's going to fucking kill you, bro. No, he's not. You show up to Baltimore again, he's going to fucking kill you. He was a nice guy. That's because he hadn't been activated. Here's the thing. He won't kill me because he wouldn't want to ruin the homicide statistics. Why do you think he got into contact with you? Who do you think put that together? You think that was random chit-chat? I think it was random chit-chat. You are doing nothing as a coincidence. It's so funny. It was a political contact introduced us to him, and then he. Oh, interesting. And who was that contact's contact? The cop. Right. Yeah. You don't fucking think. He just knew to say doctor. So you don't even fucking think, bro. Nothing enters that little head of yours, bro. Just Apple AirPod Maxes and Xiaomi products. And Shen Yun attendances. You're a fucking lifetime member. We should go to Shen Yun. You guys, no. Do not do this. You bitched me. You all bitched me. Why would we bitch you? Because I wanted to go to the Erica Kirk rally in Riverside and no one said the fucking. No one said anything. Okay? Kelby's the only guy who said I would go, but I don't want to go that far. I'm like, that's fine. I'm sorry. I can't say I want to go to Shen Yun because I didn't go to the Erica Kirk rally with you? Yes. We do shit together. No, we don't. But if I want to do something, you guys fucking say no. We do shit together. We do shit together. Yeah, but I was. You're finally like, oh, you never do anything. This is something we all do together and no one wanted to go to the Erica Kirk rally. Did you go by yourself? We have to tell him we went to the Erica Kirk rally. No, you didn't. Yeah, we did. All right, dude. Then how was it? I mean. I mean, it wasn't great. It was conflicting. Electric. I'm really inside. Because like, you know. That's what I wanted to hear. I wanted to hate it, but I couldn't look away. And the dance routine? Yeah. Well, that's what I wanted to see. And then Lil Yachty came out? They were so hard on me. Yeah, Lil Yachty. In a word, it was like season five of House of Cards. Oh. Okay. Yeah. No, I get it. And you wanted to finish the show. You watched all of the shows so far. You just want to finish. You just want to finish it. It's so bad. You guys fucking. You bitched me, bro. Kelby did come up to me. He was like, dude, it's in Riverside. And I was like. He's right. I know. It was. That's a long way. And then what am I doing? I'm going to Riverside to like ironically attend my second right-wing event. What would we actually do there? Genuine question. You just go. You watch it. You observe everyone. You look. Would you actually go? This is what I did. I went to. When he was campaigning, I went to a Trump rally in 2015. Really? For real. You were the last twink back then. Me and my libed up friends. Just to see. We donated. We went. He registered to vote. We voted for him. But this is what I'm talking about. Just to check. This is what I'm talking about. At the time, because he was. He'd never won. He didn't seem like he was going to win. It was funny to go. Right, right, right. It was like, we'll go. We'll make fun of our stupid town that's showing up to this. We'll go make fun of the silly things he says. Now it doesn't feel super funny anymore. It doesn't. I think there's a difference between an Erica Kirk rally in 2026 and a Trump 2020. 2015 thing. And wait for 2036. Wait till you see our next fucking president, bro. Wait for 2036. Guess who's fucking next up, bro. There's a woman that's running this shit and she's pregnant. She is pregnant. Oh, man. That's a job. That's a job for a pregnant woman is doing awesome fireworks dance routines. Yeah, I mean, it would have been insane. I would have thought it was really fun. And we didn't. You know, it doesn't sound like we're going to go just looking like. Like, the whole time, it's like, let's go and experience something crazy. That's what I want to do by going to Shen Yun. That's the thing. But you didn't go to the Erica Kirk rally. And Shen Yun is probably not in Riverside. Maybe. Oh, well, the thing is, it's two cults and you just chose the Chinese one and that's fucked up. I'll choose. I would join whatever cult that's within a 30-minute drive. Honestly, that's fair. That's very. That's a very LA. Erica in the. Eastern part of Los Angeles? Ah, catch me there? Catch me there. I'm going to China this week and. It's crazy you're going two times in two months. Yeah, I can't believe that. He did it when he drove that damn car. He went to France all that time. It's a damn lot. But I have to learn a bunch of Chinese. You want to hear what I have to learn? Yeah, can you say hi, I'm Ludwig? Um. Ni hao. Wushu Ludwig. Nice. Well done. Aiden gives you a little. I mean, he did it. Just the pronunciation, is that really what you're. Yeah. He doesn't need pronunciation at all. Aiden's really the guy to talk to for that. Pronunciation is. is low on the list of what you need. Here's the deal. This is what they want me to say. Bear in mind, this is two minutes long. Oh my God. I'm just going to play 10 seconds. I'll just. I'll just fast forward a bit. You're not getting that done. You have to do this? That's fucking crazy. Dude, that's crazy. You have to do this in the game? Yeah. Give me a blunt in 30 minutes, bro. And I can do that shit backwards and forwards. Say whatever the fuck you want. Dude, I didn't know that you were making you do Chinese voice lines. Of course. The game's in Chinese, Aiden. Yeah, but I assume just like when you play the game in Chinese and they translate it into English for you, they would do like Chinese subtitles for your English in the game. That's what I assume because you're. Aren't you like a foreign traveler in the game or something? Yeah, but I'm not from England. Where are you from? Another part of China. I know the white man from another part of China. He's in America town in Beijing. Yeah. Yeah, I'm here on the jet program. I'm teaching Chinese, or excuse me, English to Chinese citizens. White boy speaks impeccable Mandarin is his character. That is a lot, man. That is going to be the longest day in the studio of your whole life. You think the shoots with Dan are bad when he's walking around playing with his ass? And they are bad. I do say that. I say these are fucking bad. You're playing with your ass, Dan. You're playing with your ass. I can smell your ass. You can smell your ass. You'll be playing with that shit all day. I smell it all over your fucking hand, Dan. And now I'm going to have to be in that suit. Yeah. Ripping some Chinese. So if anyone out there is a Chinese speaker, if you want to hit me up, just hop on. up on uh discord for four hours yeah love to hang out with you is what he's saying if you want to hit him up you could just do you could do one of those polyglot uh videos where you were you how much how much i became fluent in chinese in 30 days except it's four days that i have yeah but for tip to tip yeah you're owned i record this on friday you're gonna go there to do it yeah i'm going to china why don't you just do it overseas what your only job is to give them voice lines no you can send that electronically it's a video oh video product video product that's filmed it's it's high definition video and also audio oh that's cool and then they're putting all that in the game yes and you pop up and i pop and i'll be as video oh my god let me ask you something did you ever ask these people along the along the way how do we get slimeable ah i in a way yes it's funny because i said how do we get northern line involved you're right and if i brought you they probably wouldn't be able to tell they have no idea so nice to meet you you get away with that when i bring you the glasses they would probably be so fucking funny oh man yeah it's just like the game comes out like months a year later and it's just like featuring northern lion i think the game's supposed to come out in march oh that's fast turnaround it is a fast turnaround it's not really a speed runnable in the sense that it's like a story game that's why it'd be such a competitive category for you because you could like get to the top really fast i guess i could yeah the competition should be low yeah that's good for you it'd be like uh mad dog mccree you guys ever play that game that's the guy from old watch is it pull a mad dog is it mccree maybe i think it's mad dog mccree pull it up it's a pc game you guys ever play that game that's the guy from old watch is it pull a mad dog is it mccree maybe i yeah mad dog mccree oh my god this is sick love this game dude i had organ trail 3 on the computer and it had this type of shit where a man talks to you it's a man it's a video and he's in an old western town he talks to you uh yeah and you when you shoot does it just like get to another video of him going ow you choose like a win or lose yeah and yeah there's reactions yeah mad dog aesthetic for a game you should play this show watch you play this shit mad dog mccree i'll watch you fucking dumbass stream now i haven't played it in maybe 20 years fire that shit up play it do a germo stream um yeah i could i wonder if it holds up i can't believe they ported it to the wii is that real yeah i mean it's point and click right american laser games mad dog mccree rated t for team there's a there's a uh melee joke in there somewhere that i'm just not fast enough to find well guys did you fucking did you fucking miss me because you guys ignore me the whole week pretty much i watch your stream like so much no i i watch your stream no you fucking don't you came in because yingling banned yusuf and i got mad and i said yingling leave yusuf alone you guys don't this has nothing to do with you and then aiden came in and said is yusuf banned good like what the fuck is going on what is going on we're using slime stream we were mad at yusuf because he left the stack and he wanted to go watch slime stream and we we were mad at yusuf because he left the stack and he wanted to go watch slime stream and we so to keep him in check we banned him no he wanted to go study he's being a doctor he wanted to go he's also in med school whatever he literally said i have to do homework minor detail and then yingling was like the table's hot he fucked us so you the table was hot and he did fuck us he left why did he fuck you he left when the table was how many games did he play with you he played two games and how many did he say he'd play before i started uh might have said a few he honestly i think he said one And then we managed to squeeze in wow this is the shit. I have to deal with you're disgusting pig It sounds like a rich I'm leveling on face it. I'm leveling on face it and if you should had kept playing with us We could keep it sounds like a rich man at the table with a big stack and a guy comes in with $100 And he says I'm gonna play one hand 52 bucks any wins and he plays another 15 wins And you guys like keep playing all night But you can say that cuz you got big awesome. It's been fun because we have a little team and when the stack breaks up it's not what a team that we practice with with set hours for see you know you're a fucking you're a Terrorist I'll play you're a piece of shit watching your CS streams make me actual mad and I get why people get mad on Twitch It's disgusting. I think that phase is Mad at you cuz the last time I tuned in I think you got that ace on dust I was like that's pretty quick an ace on dust that you've been quiet about Why even my ace on does he will I think we talked about this last time we go to a case on us He cracks Cases, and then he didn't know that it shows the whole fucking server that when you crack cases And I can't handle it Ray and Leslie are Leslie are serious about this. They're grinding offline They're messaging to like you get practice. They want me in the stack, but I'm kind of don't want to step on his action You I feel like he wouldn't want me on my action I I have this feeling that if I got in the stack Ludwig would feel like the limelight was they asked me and I Internally I said Ludwig wouldn't want me there exactly right you feel like I did the same thing Yes, thank God someone gets it I know it's okay the deal is I would be happy for you guys to join the stack Because you would quickly discover why I say no when they asked me to join the stack wait you and you play with them Occasionally you play a lot. I want okay. I'm sorry. I have I play with a lot less than I get here Really? Yeah, I play I played like I don't know 10 games of CS in the past month Maybe maybe I do think I do think the the true Like the everybody seems motivated. It's cool You're all playing a bunch the worst way to climb is all of you playing together at once I think yeah when I because the Bulls is 16k we shut this music we talked about this, which I think you can all do I think it's just hardest if you stacked. I'm not gonna be playing with them I'm not gonna be doing that but you have to play together for like a tournament or something. Oh, yeah, that's fine I'm gonna cross that bridge we get there, but I play by myself your ace, bro. This is my ace. Yeah, so I Got a nade kill earlier off-camera rocking out with the Scout. That'd be the shotgun. Yeah, he loves the XM. He fires it at palace I've talked to you about them. Yeah We've got 37 HP and armor. That's plenty rosters pretty low. We like that. It's where their feet are. We're full stomping into sight Smart good flash. We saw that pulling out our you till Flashing himself pretty much. There's a good smoke smoke and looking away from it as if it's a wall That they cannot walk through turn away from the nades smart Okay That play when you're low HP here, I think this is good to mix up. There's no way when you walk past you Yeah, there's no way. So this is a great play. This is a great play and Then oops, sorry Any plants for money any plants for fucking money, bro, that's the guy about is Brad mogul. That's money Yeah, so it's like I don't know I'll get there, but I'm not 16 case it's whatever but now I implore you to because I think you'll it'll fracture your relationship. I've played with them. Yeah How was it? It's great Why is it great? It's great because we all have fun because it doesn't affect your you low In joint and joins on the second account would I play would I play it? No, I play on my but this is the beauty of the Premiere face it system. I don't care about premiere anymore. So I just cute right? Yeah, you've insulated away from the and it's it's into its face it time Or premiere time, right? And if they asked to play face it with me, I'd be like I'm sick And that's really I'm gonna ask you if you would they want to queue face it. What do you tell her? Oh, I'm so sick Oh god, I got a new kovat. Oh It's that new kovat that make you shit. I got kovat 26. I've been shit and crazy Leslie Premiere I'm feeling way better. I'm feeling way better It's gone down I just like joining the stack because it makes the acronym even more powerful because it's another s it's F slurs, which sounds worse Yeah, I thought I would fuck it up. I can't put me at the end doesn't help if Leslie leaves and you join It's really bad. Yeah That one you can't you've got to get away with the one you're doing, but you can't get really get away with the one No, if that happens, I can't have you coming in then though. This is okay. Yes Everyone come play God for Me are in this crazy. Let me send you an Xbox Right now. We're like Nick comes into the office any any clocks into work and it's turning the Xbox one on and Playing Modern Warfare 2 on the big TV, which is usually well when I'm waiting for something. Yeah, it's like it's not fun on that It's like it's like a little Xbox punch card You got a clock in your games? Yeah, you do wear a hard hat? When you sit on the couch and just play on the big is kind of nice cuz he's put he's playing on the biggest Laggiest TV so the whole room can see it and this morning we watched him hit a clip It was kind of tight hit a clip little laggy TV on Wi-Fi with the wireless controller. Don't fucking matter bro in that game I'm God Fucking God in that game. That's you pulling up the premiere games. He doesn't care about the results on that TV Yeah, and then I frag and then you fry. Oops. I fragged. Oops all aces. I mean maybe the way we play When we feel there are not as high stakes is the way we should play all the time With a sense of confidence and to try hard stack. It's electric right now That was dude that might have showed on camera a bug got fucking nuked that bug got nuked bro yeah he got hit with a rail gun I wanna go look at it alright guys thanks for listening to podcast we're gonna go look at this smoking bugs corpse hopefully we'll have something to report on on the primo I'll tell you guys all about Slime's secret mouth when we're on the primo my secret mouth has many secrets and you'll learn some of them but not all of them bring your secret mouth with you