Ep. 233 - The Worst to Ever Do It

[MUSIC] Before we were recording, Nick England said, "I like it better when I get money back for my taxes instead of owing it." [LAUGHTER] I think. So we started tier-listing because definitely S tier is getting money back, right? It's probably not owing anything. It's probably floating somewhere on BC tier, depending on dealer's choice. But owing money, that's F tier. Oh, it's definitely the worst. It's definitely lower than the rest of them. That's you hate to owe money. But if you give an interest-free loan to the government, get a little back. What's not paying? What's not as it's a B or C in the middle? No, not paying. You live with the fear. A word like avoiding? Yeah. That's actually the most interesting part of the tier-list. Will you live with the fear that you may get caught one day and the consequence will be greater? It's A till it's F. Or you live with the rush that you could be caught one day. Sorry, sorry. I live life with more love than you with more love. You're a lapdog cuck to the IRS. Do not act like you're defiant. I'm defiant. You came in that one day and said, "We're paying too much in taxes." Yeah, you're not defying anything. I'm defiant, bro. You're not defiant. I'm defiant. I know you're not defiant. Listen to me. Let me correct it. It doesn't matter how defiant you are. Is that boy's name? Michael Powell. Chairman of the Fed. Austin Powell. Listen up. We know where you live. You with the fucking blade. No, he was going to say that when I said that. A company by Nick Vercillo. There you go. If you make me pay taxes. You got your Rome. You also messed up his name. I'm sorry. No, I'll redo it. Thank you. You guys did your Rome Powell. You should be going out as a fucking Glenn Powell. I'm sick of him acting in every fucking movie. Glenn Powell. When the camera pants, you don't do this. And stop hugging on Sydney Swini, dude. Do you know what? She's not in the camera. She's not hugging on her. That's my screen girl friend. I'm not hugging on her since she got the gene deal. I like the idea of Jerome Powell once again making a broadcast of the American people be like, his name is Ludwig Ocarin. He's after me. There are two people now that are threatening me. I'm sending the other 11 voters from the Fed chair to kill him. Dude, swap Jerome Powell and Colin Powell for a day. Okay. You're just naming guys, you know, what's Colin Powell? What was his position in the Bush administration? Colin Powell? Yeah. Ain't that the guy who said he's Swini? She does like a molder. I didn't know he was in the Bush administration. Yeah. That's cool. Yeah. He did the Bush administration and then he did Top Gun Maverick, which made sense because he was a military guy. I was well-siding. Oh my God. Talk about it. No. We're watching. Okay. We're watching. Okay. We're watching. We're watching. We're watching. Did you not do a lemonade stand with hatred? Oh. There we go. Yeah. I got a seismic alert on my phone. I check it. He's running on the treadmill in our warehouse. Yeah. I check it today. There's just two holes where the feeders supposed to be. Yeah. Wait, let me get in there. He has breasts. Large ones. Large ones. Oh, no. I feel bad. Why? If you guys haven't seen one who looks like Lately, look up Mike is Rayleigh. If you haven't seen him, he looks like recently. Just look outside. It's like end of the video and he's just the face looking at the sky. No. Yeah. Bullying is bad. It is. Yeah. It's good, man. It's good. We've all seen events on Twitter. We bully eight rocks. We're actually the same person. For context. For the first time in my life. I'm one pound lighter than him. That's a fucking girl. Yeah, I saw him like the day you said he was super fat now. He looked so normal. Yeah. And I was like, everyone, why didn't they love everyone saying you're fat. Yeah. And he's like, why is everyone saying I'm fat because he's one eighty two and I'm one eighty one. Like, he started saying like this. That wasn't noticing. He's saying these ones. Yeah, he's doing it. He's doing it. There's a tweet that's like dude, a fat guy could be like dying on the ground and he'd still lift up his shirt. Yeah. Yeah, the shirt that pulled down and I say this as, you know, I'm the fact that they're the fat genius. I don't know how much you got. I don't know. Dude, I'm like one eighty five. Dude, that's not even that bad. I mean, for me, short-king. Yeah. Pretty bad. Not short either. What is it? Let's talk nice to our friends this year. How about that? What? Let's talk nice to our friends. Yeah. What are you guys doing? I'm not laying down. I just think. How bad is it? I don't like when you're mean to my friend. Yeah. I don't like it bad. What? Oh my god. You're totally ill. I discovered. My doctor tells you. Yeah. The worst part of that would be that you got to tell me. Oh. I don't know what Ludwig telling me I'm terminally ill. And we hired an outside actor to tell you and then I show up. Hey. Dude, on the other side of that, being the one to tell Ludwig, he's going to die. Oh. Oh my god. I get it. He's like, how do you get to put this on the floor? You would be so disappointed because you'd say I'd be like, oh, cool. Yeah. You wouldn't fucking, you wouldn't reply. You wouldn't reply like, okay, seven works, but then you would, but then you would start to wither like Steve job, no, no, no, only eat vegetable. No, I'd go out and blaze a glory. Okay. You're dying. Yeah. What is your, you're not allowed to go to the doctor. No, I don't go to the doctor. I go to plan a fitness. So I was going to say, what's your strategy? You're going to. What? You walked down the planet. What? What? What? He's been working out every day since Christmas. I was so tired and I prepped for you. - Yeah, I'm like, what are you talking about, prep? Like, you just watched one of my, like, what are you talking about here? - It sucks, I have to blow her up for this, but her prep was literally three lines on her notepad app, and those three lines were three words each. So, that was her, that was her prep. No, no, it's not a set up. - Two words. - It was just three things. She's like, look at all this prep I did, and I'm like, you did, girl, yes you did. - Wow. And you paid for the full pro-create membership. I don't think you needed that, 'cause you talk about drawing a lot. - Yeah, I mean, look, she was upset. She ended up crying, like, she, yeah. - She was like, oh, hello, hello, hello. - Crying? - You know, crying. - It was more like-- - You made her cry. - You made her cry. - You made her cry. - I feel like-- - She's on Vogue, dude. - I didn't really-- - You're gonna show up in the same van. Conry's pants are gonna end up in-- - Vogue Philippines. - You're kind of-- (laughing) - Wait, it was Vogue Philippines? - She was in Vogue. - It was in Vogue. - She was in Vogue. - She was in Vogue. - It's just not the first stop when we think about Vogue, I guess. Anyway, yeah, so I was saying shit like that, and it basically, you know, you've crossed lines that you don't mean to cross, and sometimes people get really upset in the studio. - Did it actually go bad? - No, it was really good. No, it was fine. - 'Cause she loved mad, actually. - I think she was mad that we both, you know what we did? At the end, in the beginning, in the middle of it all, we bonded pretty quickly over you being just a son of a bitch, a piece of shit. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I made her cry the other day. - Yeah, I heard of calling her like, didn't you say-- - You said that you made her feel bad that she was like the anchor on the CST, or she thought you meant that-- - I wasn't even C.S., we were playing Minecraft shared house. - Oh, that's what it was. - And she was the anchor, and I fucking brought it up, and then she was all, she then she was like, what should we do? And I was like, oh. - She opened it, she opened it. She didn't even all, I just heard it in her voice. - And I was like, you're not an anchor, we're all an anchor combined. We're an anchor, you're one piece of an anchor. I'm a piece too. - Do you ever think that you might need to be more kind to the woman in your life? - I was just-- - Womanji. - If you've got a three in your age, and it's not the second digit, then you're crying in Minecraft. I don't think-- - I don't think we're all-- - Hold on, I don't think we're all-- - He's just on one side, it's like, you've cried in Minecraft. - Yeah, of course. - Well, you're a coal player, it makes sense. - Yeah, I'm excruciating that. - Are you ironed now? - No, Nick, I'm coal too, I went down. - Oh, that's crazy. - Don't, Zipper, don't go. Zipper's following the saw very closely. 'Cause he likes Minecraft. - Zipper, you know I'm getting persecuted. - What do you mean you're getting persecuted? - Do you know what Romans did to Jesus? - Yeah, 'cause they're taking you to the end? - We talked about this, bro. I'm losing, if you look at the time, so look at the time, right? So, you see it says lost. - Dude, you got diced up by BB bald? - First off, I'm getting stream sniped. - There are fucking smurfs. - How do you stream sniped in a speed running? - Bro, you lost the stance? - Were you here when we talked about this? - You lost the stance? - Oh, no. - He has a kid. - Like, he just had a kid. - That's pretty bad. - Lost the stance, he even played this game. - He stanzes a higher, I think, I don't know, he's a lower rank, he's a coal one. - Stanz is coal one. - Okay, here's the deal, stands. - Oh, wait, wait. - Oh, one is the lowest, I thought it was the highest of coal. - Coal three. - Yeah, it is the highest. - That guy's name is Aviv Gayer. - Wait, it's at fourth, are you forfeited to stream? - Yeah, okay, so I was watching his stream and I was doing some work, I wasn't live, and I stream sniped him, and it turns out it's so easy. All I did is I saw him click the start matchmaking button, and I clicked it, and it was my first attempt. - Wow. - And then I recorded my POV, here's the deal. I had an hour 15 of computer time, and then cutie told me she needed that 430. And she needed it to do a Zoom memorial meeting, like a memorial service. - Like a funeral? - Yeah, it was like a, it was like a in memorial. - Like a venerate? - She was like record something. - No, it was for, it was for Danya, the chess player, but she had to record like a memory, and they're making like a, and so she's like, she told me she has this, and I'm like, that's important. - Yeah. - And I'm like, I have an hour 15, let's boot up a game. - You're like, babe, it's anyone else, but I'm playing Stanz, I can't pause. But just to be clear, I fucking, I closed out. Like, I FF'd. But the run was going so badly for both of us that an hour in, we were both basically at step two of seven. - Okay. - So I just, I had to, I just had to, 'cause there's no way I could have won, so I just FF'd. - No, he won. - No, he won, yes, he won. - You know what, you having to explain this doesn't make you look good. - Okay, I still have a question. I still have a question, and I don't feel like this was answered the last time we talked. 'Cause I understand that most of the time these endin' forfeits. But people drive you insane, so they play it all the way out. - It's like I'm coming here, and you guys are like, - Kitto, explain why your dog tried to get it. - I don't know. - Like, I don't come back. - I've retained you. - The information. - I don't know, we're nice to our friends. - I don't come back from the five FFs over at fucking, at the park down, down the ways. When you get your ship-wishing. - Oh, 'cause StreamStype lets them understand how deep you are on the run, 'cause you only get certain checkpoints. - Yes. - They know exactly where I am. - It's like beating me would be the greatest accomplishment of their Minecraft career. - But you snipe stands? So it's like what goes around, comes around. - How does Stream close? And I recorded my POV, so you know, it's honest. - It's also different, like, you know, we've snipe each other in these times. - In these hard times? You know, I think I actually don't think I've ever snipe you because I know you'd freak out and kill everyone in the office, but-- - I don't think you'd be in the snipe area. - Let's applaud what I covered the entire year. - You can be honest. - You've never been, you've never been in a rank where you could snipe me in again. - Whoa. - I think we have. - Ever. - I'm eating claps. - Oh my god. - And it's just, we're getting claps. - I've never ever ever. - He said never ever, okay. - This you learn how to clap. - Oh. (laughing) - Ain't lying about having a flu. Coming in with a mask, because he can't stay away from his computer for a day, getting everyone sick. - Wait, this is absolutely disgusting. - Why did you do this? - This didn't happen. - Did you come into the mask? - Did you think, hold it, let me ask, let me ask you this. Let me ask you this. Do you think it happened the way he said it? Just yes or no. Do you think it happened the way he said it, just now? (laughing) - No, please. - No, I love the defense. - Is this your real court? - I would let you talk as long as you wanted. - Intrinsically. - Intrinsically happened. - Intrinsically. - Intrinsically. - I came to the office on Friday afternoon in a mask after I knew everyone except Nick Yangeling had left to play Counter-Strike because Nick Yangeling sits on the other side of the room and he said it was okay that I came in the mask. - And that's the mortal difference. - See, that's what makes him climb that rank ladder. - 'Cause he's coming all the sick days. - He's coming all the sick days. - I think he has somebody else here too along the way. - Oh, I work on a sick day. - That's your Jordan Fluke right there. - My Jordan Fluke? - That's your Jordan Fluke. - Yeah, and guess who hit a new level and face it? - What would you-- - This guy. - This guy. - I don't know if he had an office or anything. - He's level seven now. I also think you didn't have the flu 'cause you were like fine. - I did, I was like a big deal. - No, I get fucking dizzy. - Did you have your flu shot? - No. - I had the flu though. - I got like 13 COVID boosters. That covers the flu problem. - Look, I'm tracking the information. My girlfriend got the flu. She tested positive for it. I developed the same initial symptoms as her and I just, I have the strongest immune system of us all. I thanked it. - I have to believe him 'cause he never got our poop disease. And then he said, you know what? People at the office be damned. I need to go to my computer. - Dude, I asked the one person there for consent. - Beats mode. - Beats mode. - I think, and my mobile moves, we call that beast mode. - That's just the kind of things we consider beast mode. - I guess I even went beast mode today. - Whoops, I hate to go beast mode. - Is the flu test store bot? - Can you buy like a normal flu test store? - She didn't test for the flu. - I don't think so. - That's the lie. - It's more lies, I don't have a flu. - It's like a day lies. - It's like, you know, like it's like a COVID test in the community. - I don't think you have a flu. - It's all in one. It's all in one. It's like three, do you just pee on a pregnancy test and sometimes I'm gonna lay off. - Pimpoon conditioner together. - And you're like, oh, okay. I thought it was a baby. - Well, man, dude, I think you've been lying about your whole life up to this point. - Me? - Yeah, dude, I'm fucking sick of it. - Dude, I called my mom. - I was talking to her. - This is important. - What have I lied about? - I talked to my mom and breath-taking woman. And we were just chatting. - I say. - And we were just chatting and she interjects. And she's like, oh, what the, it didn't. And I go, what do you mean? - What? - And then she's like, you quit the butt ghost. - Interfer Justin. (laughs) - And she thought that you quit. - Rumor travels quit. - She thought you quit and laughed. - I didn't quit, dude. - Wish would. - That's what I told you. - I said, I said, wish you would. - You don't even want to do the fucking invite show with me, dude. - You, oh, my God. - What happened to Thursday? - I don't even want it. - He started, he started to process. It's like, it's like you tell your girlfriend, you never get me flowers. And then he's buying flowers for seven days in a row. - You don't want it, he doesn't even want it. - No, you don't get to just do it all. You don't get to make it all up. - I guess we just won't do it. - You don't get to make it all up right away. - I guess we won't. - Guy who forgot to do the invite show for eight weeks in a row. Yeah, I'm not that sick. Let me say mask when I go play. - I've never said that. I never said I forgot. - Yes, you did. - Eight weeks. - You did. - You said forget, I just forget, I really forget. And I say, man, if you forget, we shouldn't do it. And it becomes a whole thing. - What is it? - No politic here. No politic. - This is the other guy. - Three, three, balance time. - You're the no politic guy. - I'm no politic. - You live in Tel Aviv. - Guy who likes turbo tax. - You wanna come in me about some gaming shit? You like turbo tax? no tax perotax user for years was a happy customer. Don't know what to say. You know, also the happy customers, the people that get lobbied against because direct file disappeared, kill yourself. Nick England was so pissed off he owed money to the government that after TurboTax told me he owed money, he went to H&R Block and said, "Can you prove that?" And they said, "Yeah, you owe money." And he paid more. Is this real? This is real? Can you prove that it's funny? Did you say? Did you say? He said, "What is happening?" You went to another company, paid more money to lead to your taxes to make sure the number was okay. At mobile moves, we call that beast mode. That's a second opinion. What's wrong with a second? Sometimes you put a second opinion. No one, it's like, no one's gonna audit Nick England. No one's auditing Nick England. Look, I don't think he wanted to stop and audit. I think he was hoping H&R Block would be like, "Yeah, we crunch the numbers and you get $500 now." Yeah. I think that's what he wanted. He wanted it to magically swing the other way. Yeah, I think he was like, "Oh, yeah, they just forgot the tax 13 section." It's not a coin flip, but he's only imagined the coin flip in his mind. The first year in a young man's life where they owe instead of getting money back is a big year. Sometimes we will never owe. It's very scary. It depends on the job you have. And it depends on the job you have to not pay it. You gotta just not pay it. If you guys are wondering, you can just pay it on all tips. Yeah, so he actually makes almost no salary. Bro, he comes and drops something up at your house and swings the iPad over. And it'll like stay there for a bit. Like you're here. And I'll be like, "What?" And he'll be like, "Well." He's finished the transaction on the iPad. He's as a toast thing, no wait. Sometimes I stuff a hundo in. Do we have his paycheck under a beer pint on a wooden pizza table? I think, I think I know. I think I know why you're unhappy. What are you talking about? You're unhappy this week. You're taking it out on me. You're taking it out on the end. And I think it's because. - What did I do? - 'Cause I showed up a Gucci store. - It's because the Big Man shut down the Gucci store. - I showed up a Gucci store. - You can't even do that. - Big boy, that would piss me off for a while. - And your routine was taken. And it's like, and I get it. Because it's like, what does it need to take? - Well, it doesn't need to take-- - Well, it doesn't need to take-- - It's from how big dogs roam the earth. (laughing) - That was all mad about it. - You know, I was frustrated at you, but you really cracked it open and I'm glad you did. - I know. - And it was so weird. No, I'm not actually mad with it. But like, so I get done doing the podcast of Valkyrie, mascara everywhere, right? It was really good. I had to like console her without touching her. - So I don't want to touch somebody that made cry. You don't want to touch her on the shoulder. You just like kind of want to get out. So I get out of there. She's crying. And it's crazy. And so, but then I'm like, okay, I have time. I'm gonna go get a bagel. Go to the office, do this. And then we do the podcast later. I go to the bagel place. I drive into the driveway. There's a guy who looks like Andy Sandberg. There's a bunch of shit going on there. And he's like, oh, hey, it's no parking. Sorry, I'm like, okay, I parked somewhere else. Walk across the street to the bagel place. Walk in, they're doing a shoot. I walk in, there's a lady there. She's like, hi. Like, are you guys like open? She says, no. Okay, I fucking leave. I go across the street, get a coffee at the other coffee shop. I walk out, Dan Najarian is across the street. He goes, hey. I'm like, what the fuck is going on? I walk back over there. Ludwig has had the team of mogul moves who nobody I saw would to make a shoot at the coffee shop at the bagel store. He shut down. He shut down your neighborhood coffee. He shut it down like pop smoke. And so I walk back in. Now it's all populated with faces I can recognize, which is also weird. And now I'm just hanging out, waiting for Ludwig somehow at the fucking, I have no idea how this was happening. This bagel shop is miles away from the studio. And then I'm sitting there. And then, and I'm like, all right, I guess I'll just hang out and see Ludwig. And then I see that ice was in my neighborhood at the grocery store I go to. And I'm like, I've got to go. This is real. I left to go try to film ice. It's actually incredible. We actually managed to deduce almost all of it. Well, this sounds like a dream. Because it sounds like when you have a weird dream. This all came right after I did the podcast with Valkyrie. Right. Like this is all. Yes, I made Valkyrie crap in my words. She was moved. And then Ludwig shut down the bagel store. This all happened. And it actually makes so much sense why you're at the coffee shop now. It's because you were at the studio with Valkyrie. That was the missing piece. Dingling told us that you went from the coffee shop to film ice. And we were like, I did it. And Andy goes, before asking any questions about that, he goes, why would he go all the way back home? (laughing) This is making me sense. Why would you go to that coffee shop and then go back home? I had to get in the good footage. They weren't there, the fat fuckers. They bought all the ground beef and left. They were whatever. They just ground beef? Probably, yeah. Yeah, sounds of it. I went there and it was just cleaned out. They're probably eating it out of a dog bowl. They had H.Y.K. I'm one of those rotating like pig fires. (laughing) There was this for years. This is the second time we've done an H.Y.K. Real respite. Really? Yeah, isn't that awesome? And there will be a third. Yeah. Well, there's enough of them. Yeah. So yeah, they're just snarling, tearing, and. Was it legit that they were there? And they just. Well, apparently they were. I just, I went there and I missed them. We should start an initiative to set a bunch of like McCulley, Culkin, level, like, ice traps. So like Mark Rober. Like, yeah. Mark Rober, Glitterbomb. Glitterbomb. Glitterbomb. I mean, minus the glitter. No glitter. It's a risky endeavor. Well, how would they find out? What do they find out? How would they find out? I just think they would just. It's us. They would open the glitter bomb and then kill a random person, like it's not worth a risk. That is true. They would probably just kill the first person they saw. Yeah. And then it would be on the glitter bomb person. I think what you got to do is. Instead of. Then we're in a Connery's pan suite. Minus glitter bomb plus electrocution. People of Connery's pan's alt's Twitter account. I think it's called not Connery's pan. It's called sub to Conner please. Sub to Conner, please. You're such a saint. 'Cause alt's fucking demon, dude. 'Cause it knows alt. Yeah, you fake demon. I'm a fake demon. If you knew. I think. I'm not a fake demon. I'm a Gucci store. Genuinely, we put an electrified cheeseburger on the ground and we. So many Ice Agents. Yeah. Wow. We're coming. Before them. And I think you're not considering that. That would be the cost of war. That's the cost of war. You're interrogating the electrified cheeseburger metric. Oh my God. That was fucking. That was fucking yummy. Your dog eats all the ant bait in your house. No! Oh, man. Funny clip, but feel bad for Ludwig. The mask isn't helping. Dude, this does look like you. Oh my God. This is so funny. Oh my God. It doesn't it. He doesn't have it as soft devises you have. No, he's hard to find racism. Dude, look at the skinny ribs. Dude, you're affluent. No, no, no, no, no. He's got that like fuck. You don't need to see like the fucked up pictures of hairy guys wearing watches. He's got that wrist. Well, I just wrist so hairy. Oh my God. It's just a video of a guy wearing a mask who. Just the eyes are showing kind of looks like me. And I think it's a ice agent undercover getting barked at a strip mall. Yeah. In the great bear center. At the great bear center. And they're all gay on the low too. And they don't top ever hair. Yep. Wow. Think about it. Think about it a little bit. So out of busy weekend. Yeah. You had to deal with that. You get around. You get around. Yeah, I get around. Fight fast. Quickly becoming the leftist Joe Rogan. Yeah. We can finally. That way he did. To ratio JD Van. He did what Adam Frieden. You don't. He just tweets at JD Van. This is like kill yourself. Sorry, kidding. But kill yourself with a gun in real life. Maybe I don't know in a video game. But also he's cyanide. I guess. Yeah. He's reaching his wit's end, which I think is reasonable. Anyway, that was my day, man. I basically did the girl podcast. And we fucking dished. And it was really fun. I thought it was great to see a podcast. He didn't actually cry. It's a good girl podcast, podcast. And then I somehow got fucked over by Ludwig without even ever seeing him that day. I think it's going to happen the rest of our lives. Even when we're away. We no longer talk to Ludwig for 20 years. There's going to be 30 years on the road. You're going to be planning your funeral. And you're going to be like. Yeah. But like the lots and you're going to like find a lot where you want to be buried. And then, and then they're going to go. Oh, sorry. This whole section is taken. Oh, my God. Do we talked about the funeral? It's just taken by Ludwig. We talked about the funeral thing. And I was like. Here's what nobody knows. He got that litmus of going to someone's funeral from me. Yeah. Because I made fun of him for not going to doctor battles. Typical funeral. Yeah. For years. Who is his first viewer? I've got to by the way. And now, and I said over the years, he's changed his mind. I got closer to him and it takes me a little bit. It takes a while. When you said that, people started going, he's like, what the fuck is he saying? What do you mean, Uncle was funeral? And then I was like, no, he's just, he's using my language. Yeah. And when the language leaves the bubble, that's when you have a problem. Oh, my God. I am the architect of your demise and I always will be. But also the architect of my uprising. And you are much like, you are much like Emperor Palpatine. Yeah. And I'm Darth Vader. He did, he did four slight names. He always drawn those two together. I mean, pull up Palpatine. There is a resemblance. And guess who you are? Well, the fuck are your Padme. You are Padme. You're fucking Padme and you're going to die. Oh, my God. It's twins. I wasn't ready for the second. You weren't ready. You're fucking, I wasn't ready. I would be able to handle twins. I would get the twins out. You're Padme. You're fucking, you're fucking, I wasn't ready. Can I beat you? What? I beat you. He hits bad man. I beat you. Oh, he. And you know what? Do you hit me? Yes. You forced choke. I mean, yeah. We're really going to mince the words here. I abused you physically until you died. Also Palpatine took a turn. He hit your ass too. You would be C-3PO. Okay. Sure. He's got the best one letters. He is very dignified. Orgene from Bob's Burgers. It's like a crossover episode. Yeah. Yeah, jeez. It's all tracks. This is all clean and this all tracks. Actually, Zipper would be R2. You can't understand what he's saying and he's like, what he has all the secrets. That was so amazing. That was insanely good. The words on that. What the fuck was that about? You can do it. You can do it the entire time. That was amazing. It's been a few days on that one. I actually thought that was a set up. What the fuck, dude? So, anyway. It's really good. I guess I'm just a Ludwig. Do you ever think about George Lucas' hair? Maybe it's a bald guy thing. I don't think about it. It's a lot. Isn't it crazy? It is crazy. It's a little cartoonish. It kind of looks like Verso from Expedition 33. Yeah. He doesn't. There's not a single touch of recession. Oh my gosh. He's just fucking awesome. Isn't it crazy touch? Sure. It mostly just gets whiter. I think I'm going to get there. It's unbelievable. That's it. Dude, voila. I hope you don't. What? What? Don't you want one friend that goes the distance? Yeah. One of your boys to make it. Well, maybe not as a bald, right? Maybe you want a round. If I die first, which is, you know, likely, I've got to donate my hair to one of you. Yeah, I don't even say it. One of you is going to get you. It's not going to be if. It's probably. It's going to be gun related. It's going to be. I'm going to be saving some sort of-- Yeah. You were going to be at the planet of fitness that day. That's the one day he decides to work out at-- The 280 New Year's resolution. You know what? I'm actually going to do it this time. And he goes to the planet of fitness because they don't have free weights. It'll be easy. I'll just get on the machine. I don't need a spotter. I don't need anyone to see my tummy. Guys, I got my chain snatched. Again. Oh, my God. They came and got it. Again. The fifth time. I said come and get it and they came and got it. Was it at the arco? Yeah. Okay. Hey, buddy. Can I tell you something? Well, I was hanging out at the arco gang and they ran up on me. First off, I think maybe you should reconsider who your gang in them should be. And second off, I think you need to shop at gold. Again. GLD is the best place to buy men's jewelry because men don't wear enough of that nice shit on their neck. It was really nice. I got it for the first time and I told them come get it and then they did and they took it off my neck. I feel like-- And they called me a bitch. You can't keep telling them to come get it and then be mad when they take it. That's a good point. You could just say, yeah, I got that shit and then go about your day, but you're basically saying come and get it. And then when they do, this is the result of it, right? It was real gold. Well, yeah. GLD oversees real gold and resounds meticulously. Handset everyone knows that. But what they don't guarantee is that it won't get snatched if you say come and get it. Yeah. And it doesn't matter what you're wearing. Chains, pendants, rings, earrings there. They will come and get it if you just tell them to do that. Why does your face look like that? You could also try out maybe a new thing this time, you've got a couple of chains, maybe like a pendant more expensive and earring. Well, here's a good news. I think if you keep goading people into taking it, you should get something cheaper. Can I say something? Every piece comes with a lifetime warranty. Oh. Even if I got snatched. I don't say that. We don't know. Probably doesn't cover your scenario. I think you should check it. Yeah, check it. You should check it. You should check it. I think it's more like if it were a part of something. Look, for a limited time only, new customers are getting an insane deal, which isn't you because you're not new because you messed up again. Yeah. But use code yard to get 50% off at GLD.com. It's 50% off. What you guys can do is you can find Nick at any Pete's coffee in America and snatch his chain because he's going to buy a new one at GLD.com with code yard. And that's on phone them. Buy it by some day, so don't tell people. Stop saying that. Stop. Stop. Stop. It's crazy. You wouldn't give it to me. My hair. I mean, I feel like I'm the most deserving of my not. It'd be funny if like the the butler, whoever is the guy to say, and this is who this will goes to like past you to hand it to Ludwig, who still had his hair. Yeah. This is my day. Give this to Ludwig. Let me give it to a chatter. I love a knives out esch mystery of who gets your hair. I couldn't give it to Ludwig because it ended up on the floor of his house and in a coup to eat it and just die and Swift would think. Why are you nodding your head, buddy? Swift would think it's a fourth animal. Why are you nodding your head at that? Because you would. You would be in a Barbados man chain or some shit off of, like, off of like future crypto. And you would go to the funeral thing. And you would go to his funeral. And then yeah, you would just drop it on a floor. Show up late to my funeral. He'd go, but he'd be the last one to show up. First I'm going to start. I'm there. Oh, whoa. Sorry, guys. Take a you start over from the top. Second off. Eight two or one's everyone. If you want to talk about people who leave gifts on the floor, what I do. Oh, oh, thank God. I didn't think I really was like, what I do. Yeah, it is me. Look in the corner. Yeah, bro. You gave me so many towels. I can't fit them in my car. I've had to take them in, in like, trips. I have to. You've been SUV. Well, I do. No, no, no. I drive the other one now. Oh, new bitch. I have a new bitch. You got a new bitch. Right. And so, yeah, I couldn't literally fit them all. And so I do it in trips. Yeah, we'll see if that's so there in six months. Love it. Dude, I've been using the towels. It's crazy. We're going to take them home as he needs them. Oh, you're wearing the gift. Yeah, like my gift. That's my gift. It's so cool that we're going to spend another Chubbycat on Monday together. Chubbycat on Monday. Have you heard about this? I mean, we're spending Chubbycat on Monday together. It's actually, let me paint the scene in. So, last week, Aiden has this thing now. He's trying to do Chubbycat on Monday, which means going to, I think it's a restaurant. Chubbycat on Monday. Chubbycat on Monday. We talked about this. Have we talked about it? We talked about it. But he wants to go. And last time, we ended up going to a completely different restaurant. And Aiden was like, that's Chubbycat on Monday. It's the spirit. The spirit. Let's just rewind. He's never succeeded. Like, that's what I was arguing with. That's not true. Thank you, Aiden. No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. What if we go to a basketball game? And Aiden goes, Ah, he's, he's changing it. Yeah, I'm like, I didn't say it with A-tone in. I thought it was all Chubby Cattle. I didn't say it was a match of a basketball game. And he's like, Well, and all of a sudden, it happened to him. Well, it's different now. I'm the most impartial one here. So I'll be, I'll be, I'll be, I'll be, I'll be, I'll be presiding over this case. Hello, everyone, Baylif. The, the prosecution, the defense. And also the defense. Hey, oh my god. I'm the Baylif. He was the defense. You don't have to take care of anyone. It's a defense. It's a two Baylif, but he's, he's also the Baylif. With budget cruts, we cannot have another Baylif. It's a tough core. It's a bet in my Baylif. And I'm, there's all types of crud in there. Oh my god. Well, you're, you're the defense. He's the prosecution. And he's also the defense. Okay. And okay, so what do we think? I know what you're going to say. I'm going to say I want to see you without that. I, the judge sustained, you get, you may let it, I want to see the judge's fudge. Do you take your fudge out? The judge will not be showing the defense his fudge on the prosecution with the hammer. I won't hit you with the hammer, sweetheart. Almost. Do you think that he's being unreasonable? No, I think that, well, I complain when I was like, it's not Chubby Cattle Monday. If we don't go to Chubby Cattle and he was like, yes, it is. And then all of a sudden, he gets his plan changed and it's no longer Chubby Cattle Monday. I was like, well, how come when it happened to you? It's not Chubby Cattle Monday. But when it happened to me, it is Chubby Cattle Monday. Why is basketball not Chubby Cattle Monday? No, no, no, no, no, see, that's the thing. It is. It could spiritually be Chubby Cattle. I thought it was called marketing Monday. I'm doing it. Yes. Yes. Yes. What the fuck are we doing? This is where we're at. That's what I thought that was. - The first show, yeah, I smash it with another one left. (laughing) 'Cause it was awesome, right? - Dude, and you took my Lucas? - Yes, dude, they did my Lucas. - I'm also a pissed off of my synacty car, and it was fucking Aiden's. - Yeah. - Oh my, I'm getting some original shit. - It's gonna be pumped. - No, I'd be getting like smelly basketball shorts. - Yeah. - It's an old pair of Astros headset. - What else do you have in your car? - In a MacBook with no porn on it. - You actually call it. - And a Chinese version of a MacBook. - Those are expensive. - That's a military locked in the VPN. (laughing) - With no porn on it. - With no porn on it, yeah. - What are we doing? - Got no porn. I just think that-- - So you're mad about this, basketball? - No, no, no, no. - I'm not mad. - You're famous. - I said to Nick, I said, "Lovely is D-Rail Chubby Cat on Monday." - That's what he said. - That was the exact words, he derailed it. - D-Rail. - I said to D-Rail. - I said to D-Rail. - I said to D-Rail. - I said to D-Rail. - Look at him at a nice time. - We know why we did that, we know why we did that. - What happened? - That's what I care about the most. - The only reason I'm not pumped about, I wasn't like, dude, I wanna go to a basketball game Monday. - I would love to go to a basketball game with you guys. - What happened is like eight months ago, I was streaming with Leslie Ray and Squeaks, and we started getting, right first, but we started getting like 100 gifted subs, 200 gifted subs, all from one person named Grant. And Grant was just gifting crazy subs. - Disgusting whale. - And that's what I was like. - That's it, you go separately on all your accounts. - He started with Ray, but we were streaming together, and so I was like, I was like, "Where we at, Grant?" - Yeah. - I haven't seen a lot of gifted him much, eh? - Natural joke. - Natural joke. - And then he does it. - And he does it in the eye, and I'm like, "Oh, and I feel a bit weird, Grant." Make sure you have money like that, and Grant says some of the effects of like, "I'm good." - Yeah. - And then Chatt was like, "Chatt, Chatt started to pick something up." They were like, "Oh, he's good, why is he good?" And it turns out that this is Grant Williams, the basketball player, he used to play on the Celtics and now plays on the Charlotte Hornets. - So he's probably good. - This is an active basketball player? - This is an active basketball player, yes. He currently plays for the Charlotte Hornets. - Oh, when you donate to Valkyrie and your wife, Watson, I was actually doing all of them. - Yeah, no, no, but I was about to do the game now, too. - Yeah, no, I was doing the game one, and all of them were getting money. It's a charity, actually. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - This is their last string. And so, yeah, so he was in the chat. - Okay. - And I was like, I was like, "Bro, fuck gifted subs." Like, damn, they fried the jazz. - Let me go to a basketball game. - Is this real, is this the real guy? - This is the real guy, yeah. So, I then followed him on Instagram, he followed me, we DMed. He was like, I'll get you tickets to a Lakers game next year. This is like, again, this is off. See, it's like eight, six months ago, so I'm sure. - And here you are saying how much you don't want to go with your basketball player. - Hold on, let me finish. So, last week, last week, we were talking about this again, 'cause we were playing. He has not messaged me in six months. Last week, me, Leslie Rayscreeze talking about this. Like, remember that one time, you know? Next day, I don't know if he saw the street, maybe he watched it. Next day, he messaged with me. He's like, "Yo, we're in town next week." So, I didn't think about this. He plays in Charlotte. So, he's waiting for an L.A. game. They're doing two L.A. games against the Clippers and the Lakers, and this is the exact week that they're playing. - So, it's Hornets first Clippers. - It's Hornets Clippers at the Intuit Dome, and he comps tickets and then post-game passes. - Intuit's the company that owns TurboTax. - I knew that. - They have a Dome. - And we're going to bring in the money. - We're bringing two things, the Dome, Steve Valmer, the Yingo, and a chopper. And I'll warn you about Yingo, he likes to let it sing. - He likes to let it sing. - So, anyway, that's why we're going. That's why we're going is to watch the Clippers Hornets, which is a weird game to go to. - This doesn't change the-- - Is it a box? - No, it's just like five seats that were comped, and it's like pretty nice seats, like me. - This is great. - It's a great Chubbycat on Mondays in a box. - Is it a quartet? - No box, not quartet, 12 rows up. - This is great, 'cause it's fulfilling, like 95% of what I want on a Chubbycat on Mondays getting fulfilled, you know? Like 95. - What's the five? - I think it's just like maybe we could have, maybe we'll have one soon at the actual restaurant where I don't just imagine my friends are there with me. - Maybe what's soon? - And listen, I thought it could be next week. - I don't understand what your logic here. How is it not a Chubbycattle? - How is it not a Chubbycattle gathering? - I figured it out. Aiden's a simple guy. - Simple Jack. - He owns a piece of Chubbycattle. - Oh. - Blockin' new it. - He's getting a little off the back end. - You're skimming some off the top, bro. - He's skimming some off the top, bro. - The Vig. - He does the same thing with merch, bro. He keeps saying we have to make merch more expensive. We're losing money on the merch. - Is it? - I need to make money on the merch, 'cause I'm getting a little piece off the top. - Disgusting. - It's all for the Vig. - By the way, if you price your license to birch appropriately, I will give up my cut at the company. I'll shake your hand on that right now. If you meet with me once a week on merch and price it correctly, I will give up any financial involvement in the merch company. - I have to do that. - Woman, jeetong, jeetong, jeetong, jeetong, jeetong, jeetong, jeetong, jeetong, jeetong, jeetong, jeetong. - You can't, dude, you have to study up. - You cannot, you read a contract and you didn't, and you signed it. - I don't know what that means. - Crazy man. - Yeah. - Ludwig says a mead and Nick says a nothing. - Yeah. - And we got a type of mead. - You just type mead. - This is me reaching out to my friends. - And then this is later. This is later. We're scheduled in the chat. And then Ludwig is saying, can we run it the main episode just later? Not sure how long it will be for my shoot, but we can do it after that, 5pm. And I say, works for me, and then maybe we chub it up, and then nobody replies for the entire evening again. And Slime says, the next day, technically, says nobody wants to chub it up. Stop asking. - Yeah. - And then Nick comes in, finally, and says, I'll chub it up with you. - It's gonna be a pussy, baby. - I'm pulling me. - Yeah, why were you a fake demon pussy? - I keep getting, I keep getting invaded by the same hot goddess. And he keeps telling me, we're going to go chubby cattle, and then chubby cattle money comes around. I'm excited to try this fucking restaurant with you, and then clip her game. - We could go to chubby cattle, it just has to be at like 9pm. - It's because being together is more important than being at the right restaurant. - Oh, that's why it was derailed. That's why Ludwig derailed everything then. - I didn't, derailing doesn't imply that I'm not going to enjoy it. - It has grant if you can come to chubby cattle. - Grant? - Grant Williams. - Grant Williams to chubby cattle? - Well, dude, he's going to-- - Did he ever know what you're crazy? - Did he ever know what you're crazy? - Okay. - Ray and Leslie are going, "I'm gonna make her cry for the second time today." - Yeah, yeah. - It's easy. - It is. - Right? - I'm like, "Damn you." - I'm very leaving. - Thank you. - Season four of suits. - What a. - Do someone. - So Ludwig has like a company email, we'll just get random inquiries too, right? And Kelby checks it the most often. And he posted this in Slack like a couple days ago and it was just titled MCSR. Dear Ludwig, on everything I love, I can't stand another MCSR rank stream. The lack of knowledge and absolute dog shit that I see is actually going to make me have a heart attack. - And this is me. - I'm begging you. Let anyone teach you speedrunning from me and all of my other chatters' mental health. - This is like the. - Thank you, coach. - This is the same like email that Nabisco uses. - Yes. - Sorry, the dream was taken. - This is like, it's Nabisco. And like re-re-forward shipping error. Like the same dumpster file. - Are you speaking ass out your butt? - I mean, like, are they right? Like, no, there's never an appropriate email to send. - No, but are they right in the email despite the tone that they shouldn't include? - Like, does your butt talk? - Is your butt talking? - No. - I think I do a lot of things well and I do a couple things, but. - A couple things? - A couple things, but. - A couple things back. - It's like, you know when you're first playing piano, I'm great at the right hand. - Okay. - Harder than you've left hand. - I'm doing the same thing. - Harder. - What's up with the black keys? - Yeah. - Those are hard to reach. - Yeah. - They sound if you only play the black keys, it sounds Chinese. - And why are their foot pedals? (laughing) - It does. - It really does. - Isn't that funny? - Yeah. - How it does that? - It is interesting. - Right. - It is interesting. - We never talk about it. - Do you know Bok? - Never played the piano. - Who is who? - Bok. - Johann Sebastian Bok. - What do you play? - Saxophone. - He played the sax. - No, he played the harpsichord. The piano wasn't invented. - The fuck is a harpsichord? - What? - It's instead of a, you know, hammer striking a string, it's just a pluck. - And it's essentially a piano. - Yeah, being like, no, I don't play the piano and roll up and you got one of these. - All right. - We're doing so different. - Yeah, yeah. - Okay. - Yeah, no, I don't drink Sprite, I only drink seven up, who cares? - Oh my god. - It's not so simple. - Oh, they inverted it. - There's two interesting things. - How do you play Chinese music? That's the thing that I wouldn't know where to play it. - You can't have it. - You start playing, really. - That's why the Chinese emits in the piano so they could start playing Chinese music. - You want to know? - You want a little dark soul's fact? - Yeah, I would love to. - You know, Gwyn's, you'll like it. - Yeah, oh, whoa, sorry. - Gwyn's theme in the first game, when you fight Gwyn, it's only played using the white keys of the piano 'cause he's afraid of the dark. - Oh. - Fuck you. - Isn't that kind of cute? - That is cute. - That is cute. I like that. - I said, no. - Why is that not cute? - It's cute. - Darks, you don't play the black keys, it's crazy. - That's how much he hates the darks. - That's so cute. - That's why he does the long of the age of fire. - Let's see boy wants it in C major. - I'm not saying Gwyn is awesome, I'm just saying. - I'm C major's gale for me. - I don't know why he's doing it. - I do it in missionary 'cause I don't like seeing the hole from the back. Like, what are we talking about? - All the Gwyn and Tarantino's movies are played with the white keys only as well. Very different reason. (laughing) - Dude, the butthole looks crazy, if you think about it. - Yeah, I've never seen mine. - What? - What? - I've never looked at my butthole. - Break. - I never have either. - I'm afraid of it. - I'm afraid of it. - What if we all, oh my God, patreon idea. - Okay, I'm all ears, at least. - We all take-- - We do advice shows every Thursday. (laughing) - Let's go. - We could, we could. - We could. - We could. - As Aiden didn't forget for eight weeks in a row, as he said. - I was, we could. - I won't take this. - But I do think we should take a picture of our buttholes. - Okay. - Woman. - And then we listen to woman Boo Young, which I put you on to and you never responded. Ever play woman Boo Young. And then we look at him with each other. And we try to guess who's who. - Well, we should try to-- - We wouldn't know. - We should try to see with video if they change while we listen to the song. - I think they, they squipper. - Do they go into the gate quit? Any sort of verb? - Like a head crab and half life. - Like a head crab and half life, which I haven't played yet. - Kind of twitching. No, but this is a good idea. We all get pictures of our buttholes and we try to guess who's the two and only like zipper knows. (laughing) - Yes, zipper. Wouldn't that be fun? (laughing) - Yes. - This is not a good idea. - Yes, the whole. - We don't show them. - I'm kind of afraid mine looks like Riley reads. (laughing) - Well, you keep going with my big dumps. - Oh, yeah. (laughing) - Yeah, we do, we do. You are a member or porn star and it's trossholes. And it's just actually a hundred shots of the next butthole and we say porn star a hundred times. - Oh man. - Dude, there was a tweet that was like, like talk about some sports team. Like this team getting a butt spit in. And some guys were like, whatever happened to just stand there getting destroyed. (laughing) - Yeah. - Yeah, we had, I was saying this earlier miles 'cause what did miles say earlier? He was like, oh, this is like chud bait. Yeah, and I'm like, - This is chud. - I think we out of terms. - I wanted to hit the upper limit. - Chud's love. - I think I'm done. - We need to go back to the start. - That's what immediately followed. - We need to go back to chud's love. - Chud's love. He said chud's love. I was a chud, what are we, what? That's actually Nick Quentes. He's chud's love. It all for it fits, language works. - I'm low-cow bait. (laughing) - Yeah. - And your chud's love. - Oh man, that's so good. - Dude, I also, I messaged you 'cause you ran into SK, the wild Pokemon SK. She does not fuck around. For some reason I thought you meant SD kid. - I thought you meant SK, the Fox player. - I feel Kenji. - Yeah, which Kenji? - Classic mix, that was a demon, bro. - Yeah, she, - But it's like, you're saying you found out like, I'm not, who's SK, who are you talking about? - She's a gamer, she plays a lot of Overwatch, but she's been a lot of Sage Amps lands, and she gets really good at games really fast. - She's a vtuber. - Likely Holis. - Yeah. - Who? - Like Star-Lith. - Likely Holis. - Likely Holis. - Okay. - Who will start a game, and then quickly climb the rank, like void-esque levels of like ability to snap onto a game. So, you know, she started playing Street Fighter and hit like master rank within like a couple months, and then recently started MCSR. - Right now is gold two, started four days ago. - Dude. - Isn't that crazy? - What? Buddy. - How was that? - What do we got? Is there like five or coaching? Like, what can we do for you? - She's a vtuber. It could be 100 people, or 100 mice in one person. - I've met her in real life. I've seen her situation. - I've seen her play games. - It could be 100, it could be 100 mice in one person's body. - It's just a real human being. - It's 30 remmies. - It could be a lot of mice. - No mice, no remmies. - Did you look under her hat? - No, I did. I didn't look under her hat, but I will say this. I have information for you. If you're ever up against SK, she chokes when she tries to go for the most hard shit in the game. And this is actually how I beat her. I ran into her on Street Fighter ranked. I was streaming. She dropped her combo 'cause she tried to do something really difficult, and I beat her. And she wanted to blow her head off. - I think it was really funny. - You're just bringing this all up. - I'm telling you, you can bring up the one time you beat her. - I'm telling you that I am a worse gamer than her, but I beat her. - Dude, this is like David going, yeah, you pick up rocks and throw 'em in the sling shot, and sometimes Glyas gets cocky. (laughing) - It's cocky. - Okay, cool. He falls down, he's gigantic. - I picked up the fucking rock, and then he went boom, boom. - I'm saying I died. - She will make a mistake trying to sweat. - I'm not going up against her, I'm cold too. She's gold too. - One day, you will, and I want you to remember my words. Mark it down. That's all. - Take a break in the moment. - You're gonna slow-mo in the moment. You're gonna hear slime's voice. - I'm gonna say Tim, can we carve a bomb SK? - He takes care of that. - Tim does not have access to B52. - Tim can do, I believe Tim can do a lot of shit, that's dangerous. - Oh, we can send you a Python script that bricks your computer. - That's half the job. - He said a Python, just right up. (laughing) - But I can kill Bill too. - Yeah, very quickly. - I saw Anna Konda in theaters speaking of pythons and scripts. - Is that like a new movie? - Yeah, it's the Jack Black poet. - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - That made $100 million, I heard. - It was a bad movie. - Pretty bad. - Yeah, you were making it sound bad just by the way you taught me. - It's awesome, they made it. 'Cause it's just bullshit and I scoops at it. - I scoops in it. - Yeah, Jesus. - That's cool. - How was I gonna say it? - It's a movie about, there's a original Anna Konda, like a movie that came out, I think in the age of something. - Did it play the song? - It's like 99. - What? - And the-- - Yes, that's like the song of the movie. - That makes sense. - And the movie is about Jack Black and Paul Rud. It's a movie about them wanting to remake that movie and like them trying. It's a meta. - Okay. - It's like B-kind rewind. - Is it? Yeah, I chose this over. - B-kind rewind is good. - Oh. - You like B-kind rewind? You seen that? - Yeah, that's a good movie. - One of the 10 movies he's seen. - Dude, you, this guy, Selten Mello. I says real name, I think. - Yeah, you will love this guy in this movie. - Yeah. - He is like, he is like the mixture of people from all over the world slime voice. - Okay, yeah. - He's the guy who like owns the Anaconda. Yeah, what an, this guy blew me away. - Well, okay, what would you rate it? - What would you rate it? - What would I rate it? Like a letter box score? Like a five? We're gonna go two and a half there slime. - Straight down the middle, he said. - It's gotta be a three or above to be recommended. - Yep, that's very at least. I wouldn't think I'd recommend it. - I'm a movie buff and I want you to respect me. - What's the last movie watched? - The Talented Mr. Ripley. - Actually, the Bob's Burger movie. Bob's Burger. - I don't want to name it Bob's Burger. - What is that called for? - Why are you asking me the last movie? It's technically the Bob's Burger movie and then before that, the Talented Mr. Ripley. - Okay. Which one had to head? Gun, gun to its head. Which one do you shoot? Which one do you keep? - Which one do you think is higher on letter on IMDB? - Talented Mr. Ripley. - Do you think so? - Yeah, easily. I think Bob's Burger would be sitting at like, seven, one. I think Talented Mr. Ripley's like a seven, four. Those are good guesses. I put Bob's Burger at seven, three though. - Look at that, bro. - Wait, click in. - Oh my God. - A seven for Bob's Burger is seven, four with Talented Mr. Ripley. - And it's just Binks City and you're still sitting here. - That's Binks City. - You're still sitting here not fucking acknowledging that I'm a movie buff. - I give that to you, man. - Dude, Matt Damon has Nick Gingley's haircut in that bottom right. - Yeah, he's super creepy and gay in this movie. - Are they independent things? - So what if we said that about you? - Yeah, you wouldn't like that. - Dude, you like that. - Hey guys, I wanted to bring this to you. There's someone in our life who has ballooned to an unbelievable size. - Don't even finish your sentence. I know who we're talking about. - I don't think we should mention them. - We don't need to say our name. - But he is everywhere. - And that person, I feel like we need to take action. So I've signed him up for Hungry Root. - That's a good idea because he only eats Arby's. - But he's not buying the Arby's himself. He's fishing Arby's out of the Arby's dumpster. - The old Arby's. - He goes to the gas station by Sour Patch watermelons. That's really Arby's and Arby's. - All day. - And they don't know. - We can personalize the recommendations we give to him. There's over 15,000 meal options. - The only reason. He isn't cook 'cause he thinks that everything is Arby's. So he's like, why make it? I could go with the Arby's and get it. - But now I can make it in 15 minutes or less with ingredients that are made to high standards. - It's also the time we're gonna save him. He doesn't have to walk to the gas station. - Yeah, but I also don't have to preface behind the dumpster. - He's not a man with plenty of free time. I don't want to pretend like that's not the case. - We have to call it a little bit. - Like you listener who budgets your time and has like a really tough job. This would be beneficial to you, but for him, I don't want him to get away with that excuse. - It's not just Arby's. There's all sorts of options. There's a short rib friendship sandwich, for example, or the pesto cheese ravioli with the cheddar. - There's gotta be something he's willing to eat that doesn't just rampage sodium through his body. - I think Italian beef ravioli meronera could be a good Arby's filler. - Yeah, so you can convince him that comes from Arby's, I think, and it would be healthier, easy to make. - Yeah. - So if you wanna take advantage of this exclusive offer, for a limited time, get 40% off your first box, plus get a free item in every box for life. - Take advantage of me. - Go to hungaroo.com/theyard and use code the yard. That's hungaroo.com/theyard. Code the yard and get 40% off your first box in a free item your choice for life. - I'm ready to be taken advantage of. - And they want us to say it again, hungaroo.com/theyard. Code the yard, and we're looking at you, God, who you know we're talking to, you gotta stop being a raccoon behind the dumpster. It's insane. - Back to the episode now. - I think Seedaw got hacked. - What do you mean? - Conor's been sending me an obscene amount of reels, like 30 reels in a day. - Oh my God, he's locked in. - And he's never done this. I've known him in friends with him for years. He's never done this. - Yeah. - He's sending me 30 reels in all the reels. Every single one is like that format, where it's like send this to, and it's like insert a thing. - Yeah. - But he's sending me like a whole spectrum. Like I'm getting, send this to a big, black, beautiful queen. - Yeah. - He needs to see this tonight. - That's good. - And then it's like, oh, I wanna be stuffed full of this. And it's like pictures of like mac and cheese, mac and cheese. And then it's like you and black text. And then it's like, and then it's like a guy rolling backwards on a skateboard, eating a quesadilla. And he's like, you got sent this 'cause you're gay. - Yeah. - And I've seen this format. - Yeah, and I've watched, I watch everyone, 'cause they got sent to me. It's funny 'cause he would never do that with us. - Kamer Connor. - Ludwig would never watch, if he sent him 30 reels. - I would watch, but I watch them all, and now my four U-pages destroyed. - Yeah, of course, yeah. - I click it, and it's like, - There's hope though. - If your name starts with a letter B, congrats. You like penis. - Yeah. - That's it. - That's it. - What a free format to get big on reels, 'cause people just send it to me. - Yeah. - And it is churdly's bread and butter. - Dude, there's a sandwich he used to pull up these reels of this guy. It's like this British guy just screaming in his car, but he's screaming generic relationship advice. It would be impossible to find him based on the subscription, but it's like, he'd basically be like, "You're just gonna leave him, he doesn't care about you, "and people who don't care about you shouldn't be in your life." - And it's just so corny, and it's for people to send to each other to listen to this guy. Listen to him tell you what you need to hear, B. - Yeah. - It's a hallmark. - It's so insane. - Yeah, I finally stopped getting the poses from India, where it's like two Indian guys. It's like your friend poses that you and your friend can do, and it's like five different poses. - And they do it fast. - I finally stopped getting them. - But that means you were watching them. - I was sending them. (laughing) It's just so many people. - I was like throwing me in you. - He's an issue, but we never did 'em. - No, we didn't. - We should do ones. - No, single one. - Maybe tonight. - Blakers game, or Clippers Gaper is, come on. - And it doesn't matter if it's the Lakers of the Clippers. - Dude, let's all find a re-- I probably have some of my DMs with you. We'll find one we'll do one. - We gotta do some poses. - Let me show you a hole in your big chubby cattle diaper. Is that I never go, bro. I don't do, when's the last time the four of us hung out outside of this show in this office? - The thing is, I have a feeling that if-- - The answer to that could be really recent if you showed up. - Yeah. - But I don't. - Chubby cattle Monday, you keep saying, "The four of us, bro, where are you doing this?" - I'm the stone wall here. - No, you don't have to be the stone wall, because next Monday, we'll all go to a restaurant. - Can I see a question? - Please. - What is more of a chubby cattle Monday, and you have to pick one, okay? - We're at chubby cattle. Me, you Ludwig, no slime. Or we're at a Clippers game, and slime is there, and that's the four of us. - This is a crucial question. - Which is more of a chubby cattle Monday. - Taste the cattle. - You get your dicks out to the Clippers game. - And you get your dicks out. - And you got a hot dog in Cotton Candy, a Kimbo. - Oh, Steve Balmer, Steve's name is crazy. - Don't worry, don't worry, your penis is covered. - Thanks for the ticket's grant. (laughing) - 12th row, don't worry. - Oh, wow. - Jack Nicholson's looking back, being like, "Damn, that guy's getting a dicks." - You're sitting next to a kid. - It's like a merciless kid. - He's like, "We're shielding his eyes." 'Cause you're getting your dicks out to the Clippers game. - Not like the walls up in the year, the walls up in the year. - And now I get up and I go, "So which one is it?" - Right, which one's better? - Yeah. - Sorry, but I love it. - You're getting your dicks out to the Clippers game. - The one of the basketball game. - The one of the basketball game, one part of it. (laughing) - Well, makes it chubby cattle. - Well, makes it what you like the better. - I think it's, oh, it's-- - I think we silly the whole comparison with the blow drive. - Why? - I think we got him all round up. - What? - That was awesome. (laughing) - You suck, we're taking chubby cattle too. - All right, here's what we do. Okay, random one day, we get catering for chubby cattle and we show up to Slime's house. - I would not let you in. - What do you mean, not let us in? - Not let us in. - You would let us in, 'cause your shit's always unlocked. - Yeah, but then I would make you leave. - You would not, I mean-- - I have a reciprocating saw on my counter. I would take you in, make us leave. - I would promise you, I would grab it, pull the trigger and go, oh my god, I have the reciprocating saw, I had to do it. - This is my, it beats it. - This is my dark secret. - You lose. - My dark, but it's, when I came up with chubby cattle one day, fucking Steve Johnson. - Yeah, it's a talking head. - Fucking, so when I came up with chubby cattle, I came up with it. - He's got some John IVs afterwards. - He's like a sea staring at a ladder in the background. - Me and Steve were in a garage. - Yeah. - If I sick little mind when I came up to it, my main reason for wanting to do it was not chubby cattle. I left that quickly. It was, I wanted to go get dinner on Monday nights with you guys and/or some of our other close friends, because I think it would be good to have something like that every week. - We were just thinking, what if we had a slop night? - What if I could hear that, he made it slop. He snuck slop in. - It was just us four. - It was different. - Hold it, to be clear, Slime says it's Fred Slop, even when it's us four. - Yeah. - By the numbers. - By the numbers. - I bang the gavel, it is still slop. - So, can I tell you what, it's going through it and said, what's that? - It's 700 days of slop, because he's leaving. - Oh my God, he's trying to slop that. - He has an internal plot. - Oh my God. - And he has, he has a limited number of, it's 700, it's about the number of days he has left. - And then he has the name is child Torbjorn. - Yes. - And then Torbjorn is going to live in Iceland for a semester. - Oh, he's got to leave him out in the snow until he freezes. - And so. - But I can't feel my fingers. I think I need to bite them off. - But it's okay, son. And then he's like, oh you're crazy, this way in this great country for you to not to be cool. - When you raise you this way, you're going to have a little nub. - That's what you want. - Why, okay, why do you want us to get dinner together? This is dinner for the soul. We have to be funny together. - Slime, you're actually having an illness in Scotland. It's fucking gay and dumb to wanna get dinner with us. - I would rather do this podcast and never get dinner with you again, 'cause this matters more. - And it's an illness than you need to-- - Why not to both of us? - You need to move on from your illness. - Well, if I moved on from my illness, I would quit. - I'm saying your illness is that you refuse to hang out with a three of us outside of work. You are work obsessed. It's gross. - But the work is so much more fun than hanging out. - Have a conversation and not report it. - This is hanging out plus plus. - Do something that's not content for ones in your life. - It's content. - We can't run this back. - I'm not letting you run it back. - Do something in your life that's not a content related. - How is dinner better than this? - Because it's offline, 'cause it's real, though. - It's just over in the world where it is. - I like it. I like it. - You know, I like it. - I like how I'm in clippers games and getting ahead. I like it. I have my fucking friends. (laughing) And I wanna do both. - Can I come clean, man? 'Cause I've been in your shoes. I don't know if this might be a surprise. I've been in your shoes, bro. - Really? - Yeah, I've been like, I was in that fucking grind set mindset, bro. - Yeah. - I was fucking slapping out content left and right. - Right. - Okay, and then I-- - The content's just fucking covering me head to toe. - The content's not on me. And then I started hanging out. My friends are sucking them off at clippers games. (laughing) - Yeah. - And I started doing that more-- - Broad day. - Broad day. - Yeah. - And into it, don't there's a curtain. So it's fun. - Sure, yeah. - It's crazy. - You made that change. What was your favorite hangout with me in that time? - My favorite hangout with you is when we took our one-on-one trip to go to New York. - I guess it does count, huh? - It does count. - He banked that. - He did that. - He waited for his move. - God damn it. - Yeah, he did. - Yeah. - My first experience at a LAN cafe. Oh, right. - Yeah. - And so that would be mine. - Fuck. And anyway, I think yeah. - Yeah, the four of us should hang out offline. - And that's all I want. And that's all I wanted for you to have a cat on Monday. And the only reason I said derailed this morning was because I know that Nick doesn't like basketball that month. Well, I figured it's shit. - You're gonna love the head. - But you forget that the Intuit don't, the Intuit Turbo Tax don't. (laughing) As you just get ahead in the scene. - Ow, does it hurt anyone else? - Spider-hertz. Why does it hurt? Is yours guys hurting? - It hurts sometimes. - It's kinda nervous. It's like a massage chair at the mall. - It feels better if you did your tax returns. - Hello. - You stopped. - Just like hello. - I thought I was basketball and not dinner. But maybe Nick wouldn't be as excited and cold. - I like going to basketball games. - A, Aiden, listen, you're, I think you're missing the point of all this. - I'm missing the point. - I'm trying. - I think you're the reason. - Big guy, the guy who is desperately trying to spend time with his friends is missing the point. - Are you Q the zombies music? - No, no, no, Q, okay, let that play a little bit. - Black comes to one zombies. - So stop Qing that and now Q the south part of zombies. - I learned a lesson music and it's a soft piano. Well, you don't understand, Aiden, is that when I come in? - Such a pain at a heart's accordion. - When I come, yeah, when you heart's accordion. - Close rooms on your faces. - When I come into the office and you are sitting at your computer, molding at something, and I see you, and I pat you on the shoulder or your chest, and I go, all right, the man, that's beautiful to me. That's my chubby cattle. And I don't, that we don't need to do more because we have paradise right here, man. It's right here in front of us. - I love it here. I love it here, but sometimes we need to go eat too. We can eat and do both. - So Slime Show ends tomorrow. Explodes, nuclear, it goes everywhere. Patreon probably all goes to me. Aiden and you and me and Ludwig, are you getting dinner with us every Monday? - Every Monday? - See, this is what I'm talking about. It's very quickly, it's not about the fact that we have the podcast. I don't think you wanna spend every Monday with us. If it's not for fun. - Every Monday, getting my ass to, where is it downtown or some shit? - You get your ass here every Monday? - It doesn't be anywhere. It doesn't have to be, it doesn't have to be downtown. It could be a restaurant. - I don't wanna go down. - Yeah, what if we get with somebody like DJI Fridays? - What if we go to your house? What if we went to your house every Monday with catering? Last time you said you were gonna go to your house. - I don't know, that's too much stress. All the spoken people in my house, you're misunderstood everything, but if it's a DJI Fridays, - I know I do this. - I do this, I do do this. - You're fucking in my house. - People say this. - It's fine. - It's fine. - What if I sort of Americana, I run it? - What if I think it's funny? - What if I buy the house next to your house and that house is used purely as a hangout spot? - And we turn into a boiling crab. - The house next to my house. - And I turn it into a boiling crab. - And it's a boiling crab, one rule. - No bibs. - No bibs. - The house next to my house is a monastery school. - I'm gonna get rid of 'em. - You mean it? 'Cause fuck, those kids are annoying. - What? - Yeah. - Why? - They're always, why do they scream? - Yeah, well they don't have any. - They don't have any screaming on them. - They don't have a punishment at their school. - They're children. - What brother? - They probably are saying the same thing about you. Why is that man in that house screaming? - All right, man. - No. - Holy shit! (laughing) - Time poop! - Dude, my girlfriend yesterday was like, this is time to go. - Oh really? (laughing) - And I'm like, you have been poisoned. - You know what the fuck you guys are that I'm not the cultural beating heart of all your lives? You understand how insane that is? How bad that is for you. - Of course I knew, you know what it's even more insane than I want to spend more fucking time with you. Did you think about that? - Yeah. - I think, it's all insane. - When I was a jubby cattle. - When I was 15, I was in a pizza hut in my hometown and a homeless man walked in. And the first thing he said to me is, cash is king, you know that, right? - Cash is king. - And for 10 years, me and my friend who were together that we got to be saying, well, cash is king. (laughing) That's kind of what being your friend is like. (laughing) You're the homeless guy in pizza hut, you know? So it's like, it doesn't surprise me that you're a cultural centerpiece of, you know? - And I leave you with just irreversible ideas. - Sort of just like, remember that guy we saw? You said that with that thing? - Wow. - I'll never forget that guy. - This is smooth every day. - You know, Valkyrie cried today. This is as close as I'm ever gonna get. This means a lot to me, boys. - I'm the homeless guy in a pizza hut. - I hope I can make you cry. - Can I make you cry? - You can never make me cry. - What if I died? - I would cry if you died, but it wouldn't be you doing it, unless you blew your head off. - I blew my head off and my note was, did you cry? - It depends how you died. I wouldn't cry in every scenario. - Yeah. - Okay, I gotta give you a scenario. - Okay. - I died choking on Aiden's shit at the end to a dome. - Oh my god. - And I know all that. - Why does he hear you died at the dome? - It was on Vidair. - It was on Vidair. - Vidair was like, there's like a fucking thousand points of view of this shit. You're laughing as a count. - Huh? - Cry laughing does not count. - You're crying like tears of sadness. - Dude. - Dude. - No, I don't cry. - I sucked them off and the load killed me. - Oh my god. - I'd never be able to cry. I would just, I would. - I wouldn't my load kill you. - I don't know bro, I'd die. - I gotta go. - I'm dead. - You're like Superman's load, you blew out the back of his head like a fucking shotgun. - Yeah. - That should be one of Superman's power things. - You took Zink supplements from Superman that it went through my skull. - No, I wouldn't cry in that scenario. - Me and Ray. Ray, we had the exact same conversation about how I made you cry when my dad died and you read that thing and you came upstairs. - You made me cry. - I wrote the thing that made you cry. - You made my girlfriend's mom cry. - And I made you. - She read that somehow. - And I made your girlfriend's mom cry. - Your words made me cry. - Yeah. - You made my mom cry. - Your words and your thoughts that you made made me cry. - And when I told her, which was at the time, I was like, yeah, it was really sweet like tender moment because we hugged and I was like, yeah. And then there was a small part of me that said, I made you fucking cry. - I made you fucking cry. - I know. - Did you fucking cry? - I know. You have that over me. - And that's fucking dope. And the only way you can get that back, Ludwig, is to blow your head off and I would genuinely cry. - There's always that you can get it back. I call my mom and say, how you feeling? - This is just like sure-drafting. - Pre-drafting. - You're Moriarty. - This is just like Sherlock. - Killer. - I want revenge. - Because the only way to win is to- - And we have a secret sister. - Oh. - The secret sister pissed me. - The fuck off. - The show failed off. - I liked it. I mean, it failed off. It's a good show. It failed off. - It failed off. You're saying the last season failed off or that? - It's failed off now looking back. - Last series. - Not season. - It's British. - Here's the thing though, Aiden, is that- - Oh. - Cubby cattle. - Yuck. - But in that slide. - I didn't hear what he said. - Disgusting. - It's like, let's be correct to be saying seasons. It's a British. - It's not called the season. I guess it's called a series. I didn't know that. - Hold on. This is an important distinction. A season is one season in a series of the entire show. - That's for America. - Apparently it's just for America. - The UK. - The UK. The series would be the season. - No way. They inverted it. - I educate. - Well, they did it originally. We inverted it. - Oh no. They inverted what we made. - Hmm. - Possible. - They would have TV first because going outside, they're so fucking boring. - Oh, rock it out there. Let's imagine friends in our heads. - In a box. - In our living room. - Let's look at a glass. Wow. - Oh. - Anyway. - I relapsed. - How do you relapse? - I relapsed. - What? Get up. - Degrets? - No, I wish. - Oh. - Walking by 7-Eleven with cutie. I was like, imagine. - Imagine? - They got menthols here. - Oh. - No relapse sports gambling. - Pro. - Dude. - Dude. - For gold. - Yeah. - Well, you're five or five in preads. - I know. And I bet on all of them. - You won? - Yeah, I'm five or five. - How much you win? - Looking good so far. - How much you win? - It's bad, bro. - It's bad, isn't it? No, I'm literally five or five. - You know this is bad. - I know it's bad. - Tell me how much you win, bro. - He's bad. - No. - How about over under? - Okay. - Okay, over. - Okay. - 15K. - Yeah, I won the ball of 15K. - Really? - Yeah. - Wow. - Sports gambling. - Dude. - It's a problem. - The way it is now is so, call me a boomer. But like, go to Vegas and lose everything. - I agree with you a thousand percent. - Don't do it on the fucking fine. - I agree with you a million percent. - It's, it's, it's. - I want a polymark at a fear and episode. - Okay. - I could probably hit a, just a crazy parlay. It's like, okay, like, Hassan cuts off cutie. - That's like 99%. - Will this make a sexual gesture towards any male in the room? - Well, these are paying out like, like, two cents a little more. - Not these are easy hitters, but you need to do like, crazy prop bets where it's like they all check their phone at the same time. - Oh yeah. - And then drop their phone at the same time. - Yeah. - Shit like that. Yeah, what a, what a crazy piece of media that is. - Yes. - I think sports betting is a, it's, it's, it's horrible. Like how, how many things you can gamble on and how easy the apps are to get on. - Yeah. - The only reason I tried offloading, I've offloaded basically all the money I had on Robinhood, except for our stock bet. - Oh. - So I still have money on the app, because we have a trading bet that ends, I think in like a week or two. - It's almost over, yeah. - Yeah. - And you're, in dead last, and you're just not gonna do the punishment. - Yeah, probably anything. - Yeah, yeah. - Cool. - What was the punishment again? - The punishment is you have to fly. to New York and run a 5K in a suit and holding a briefcase. You're just not going to do it. He's just not going to do it. That's what we all agreed to. And he's in dead last. He's been in last the entire year. No, no, no, no. He's not going to do it. That's some Epstein file shit, bro. It's like the law says you got to release them and they're like, eh. Yeah, and Jeffrey Epstein's there sitting. That's what they call me, Jeffrey Epstein. Yeah. Chima, my girlfriend. Right. I think I coined that in your chat. Probably. I said, I went in one day. I said, Jeffrey Epstein, and then Tim Pindet. And then everyone started spamming it. No, I'm not going to lose the contest. This is old. This one's old. No, this one's old. If you go to what I think it's a Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug's last stock. Yeah, this one's, I, this looks crazy. For sure, old. He looks like he plays Luigi in the live action. Yeah. Yeah, this is it. All right, how am I doing? So we all started to last by a lot. Wait, what the fuck? Why did everyone climb so much? You're down 21%. No, I don't think this is updated. It is super up to date. This is as up to date as it gets. Are you sure? Yep. Type shit. Yes, sir. Wait, scroll down, scroll down, scroll down. Let me look at just my portfolio. It's gotta be. AMD. Oh, yeah. This is Nintendo. Yeah, I remember I made the joke. This is just what like five year olds like. Yeah. And five did it. And five did it. Take two interactive. Oh my god, if I didn't buy Trump coin, things would be doing really well for me. You did buy Trump coin. I can't believe it. It fell off a cliff 85% like that. I know. And it's weird. Like what? Policy. Did he make the truck it? I can't think of one. I can't think of one upsetting thing he did to society. And all of a sudden, I fucked a Doug Doug invest in Dutch Bros coffee. What does he know? Amazing. That's a great question. I mean, what does he know? About three percent. Apparently, it doesn't know shit. Like that's. That's a great return in a year. It's below average. Sometimes an index fund goes down. But Dutch Bros didn't think about that. That's true. You do make three bucks on your hundred. And that's good. And that's good. So it's like the competition is ruined. Yeah. It's not ruined, dude. I'm going to go and go to New York. You didn't go to New York. No, it's 2029. Hang on, it was squeak. 2029. I'm doing it, bro. Oh, nasty man. You run it with you? You run it with me? Yeah. I won't wear the business suit, but I'll run it with you in a normal outfit. I broke my record because I had a flight and it left at like, left at like 8 a.m. And I got to the airport at 840 or so, excuse me, 740. Oh. And you know, Gates closed 15 before it takes off. You should be execute. But you didn't knock it on that flight. I got on that flight. What airport again? It was in Salt Lake. Oh, believable. believable. Okay. I think the LAX. The LAX would be harder. That's impossible. Salt Lake airport is pretty big, but I went east, but I ran. I could not do a 5K right now. Oh, shit. Tough for you. I did 200 meters. I was panting when I got on that plane. Okay. I was panting so much. She gave me a water bottle. That's awesome. Like, I had most of looked parched and I was. I felt in my mouth, but I wasn't going to say anything. Is that you're going to die on that plane like some people do and you got to sit next the whole time? Yeah. What's your, what's your, you got a trash bag right now? You're doing trash bags, though? I didn't know. I didn't know. I did nothing. I did not. Is it crazy that planes don't have on board doctors and we got to ask who is going to pay for that? A plane doctor? Some planes have on board. We have a guy who sits in the fucking cockpit and doesn't do shit while the pilot drives. We can have a doctor. I think that guy a doctor. That guy should have to hold on to the answer. I think they just rolled like most planes probably have a doctor on it. Just by luck. Like sheer luck. I guess if you look at the wealth distribution, it's like, it's like 85% of planes probably have a doctor on there or someone with some stuff. Not on a spirit plane. The fuck doctors on a spirit plane. If I could take on a spirit plane. But spirit planes are not calling the doctor out. Spirit planes, if you die, they have like a, like a waistband. Yeah. Spirit planes, if you have a stroke, they, they actually just like cram you into the compartment where the food is. Right next to the coffee maker. Like, yeah, like a family guy character. Who's the budget airline? Who just, tell us people to eat shit and die on Twitter? Is it Ryanair? Frontier, Ryanair, Ryanair. It's Ryanair and someone will be like, can I have waterer next time I fly and they're like, fuck you. Yeah, just go see fuck you pussy. Yeah, that's the whole social media plan. And everybody's down because it's like, yeah, I did pay $20 for my ticket. Yeah, you got to be happy with that. That's a spirit. I mean, I guess I haven't flown a while, but man, when you pay double digits for a plane ticket, you're like, I got away with something today. Something isn't right. I shouldn't be able to do this. I'm not shaking. So I'm like, so what's the actual fucking cost of sending me there? Because this is just costless closer to that's all the fucking. There's probably like four windover videos that answer your question. And I've watched, I've seen them, I've forgotten what they sent them. You're down to diamond. I'm Delta diamond. You're Delta diamond. And he's just like, you heard the news, you heard the news and I was like, what, what news? Somebody's Delta diamond called you to tell you that? No way. I called you. I needed something from you. And then you just caught me off and you're like, you hear about the news? Some of us are Delta diamonds. I'm also Delta diamond. Uh-oh. And like, you can cut you off on the phone, he's like, you're being embarrassed. He's like, you're saying this, you're saying, oh, I asked you for a copy of it. I said, oh, okay. That's awesome. Delta diamond. What are you going to do today? Like, what are you up to today? Maybe sit on my head, see how numb it gets. And then you cut some off, he's like, that was so loud, love it, dude. And we're in public right now and we're in the middle of a coffee shop. I would love if I went to my coffee shop and there's some guy, and he's just on the phone and be like, I'm Delta diamond. He's talking about jerking off later. That would make my day. So you're, you're a hero. Yeah. I mean, you hit Delta diamond, you celebrate. You've got a Phantom Jeric. Have you hit some of this big as that? I got a Can drink champagne, so might as well, you know, see if bubbles come out. Right. Each rock might have it too because he always books three seats. Yeah. Yeah. He gets faster. He tripled the point. It's all bad. It's all bad. It's all bad. They really, they didn't say to me on the plane though. I got a little mad. They didn't say to me on the plane. When you're Delta diamond, they're supposed to say to you. All right. Oh, welcome Delta diamond on. Is there anything you guys want to say to me? And as I get on the plane, I'm huffing and puffing. The lady comes over. She says, she says when we're in the air, something you like to drink, and I go just the water because I want to be easy. And then she turns the guy next to me and she goes for you, sir. And he's like, oh, it's blah, blah, blah. And then and then she's and then she fucking touches his knee and she goes to him. Thank you for being a platinum member. Oh, mugged and mugged. That is below diamond. I know. And I'm sitting there and I'm sitting there. And I'm like, well, if you got a pad, what do I get? You like touching your knee? Oh, diamonds. And then she just fucking turns around. That's awesome. I bought the Wi-Fi double check if I had diamond said it because I had it recently I did. You are a bitch. Why are you chopped? Maybe she was nervous because you're a diamond. She hasn't talked the word yet. Maybe you're like, pilots are supposed to say something. Yeah. They let you sit in the cockpit. Yeah. Dude, I love the idea that, I'm diamond. Let me sit on it. Yeah. No, you get to out rank other. The other members of the cabin. Let me see the yoga fit in me. Imagine the guy next to you and he's platinum. I'm diamond. Let me see the yoga fit in you. And you would ask him, you're like, hey, actually, I'm diamond. You need to show me the yoga. You need to let me sit. I smell the yoga fellas. See what I did. See what I did to the yoga fellas. Smell the yoga. I said on it. I said on it. That's what I did. I just smell the yoga. Huh? - I only smell the yoke. (laughing) - I only yoke. - And I said, I only smell the yoke. - That's my butt. - For our flight, I don't smell it. - Maybe, you know, this might be my last year, you know. Maybe this is it. - Shut the fuck up. - It's just getting good. - Keep, keep slop-maxing it. - We are. - Keep trying to slop-max it. - We got a Shelby cattle tonight, and we have six under nine years. - I don't want to smell the yoke anymore. - Six under ninety nine. Zibrik, look, I'll be yoke. I want to see if it'll fit. - Let's see if it'll fit. - Do they come in flavor? - Let's do it. - A321neo. - You couldn't fit the yoke. - A321neo, yoke. - You couldn't even dream of fitting the yoke. - But I mean, the yoke, I could. Let's see. - I can get the, I'd work the yoke like no other. - I'd be a cabit. They keep me up. - Let's see Zibrik's yoke. - Oh yeah, that one right here. - One below, one below, one below. - If you go from the side. - You think you can fit the yoke. - Imagine two boys. - Yeah, you go reckless on it. - Yeah, go right, go right. (laughing) - You got a nasty shit. - Yeah, you got a shackle. - You got to go like no. - You're passing each other. - Like two lion statues. - Yeah. - Yeah, it would be two lions. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Back to back. Like the cover, lead the weapon on that. - Yeah, it would stink really bad. - Just like. (clapping) - Hey guys, diamond member. - Wait, no yoke. - It's not the yoke. - The yoke moves separately too, huh? - That's what I'm saying. You left yoke up, right yoke in. - There's a skill to this. - There is. - What are all the buttons even fucking do? I don't think we need all those. - Most are fake. That's what people don't know. I can stretch my whole nuts at skin over that. (laughing) - He could, I've seen 'em, they're drooping. - He's seen 'em right, yeah. - I could, 100%. Stretch my whole nut sack over one half of a yoke. And then if we get pinched in the middle. - It's funny going to a weasepal with 'em 'cause he gets out before his nuts do. (laughing) - It drags me behind me. (laughing) - It's so cool. - It sucks. - I gotta roll it up like boxing hand wraps. (laughing) - What is, flag, no flag, no flag on the play. - No flag. - They call too many flags these days, it's like it's a soft game. - It's a game I don't think they like it. - Like, let them play. (laughing) - And I think I fucked up not going for the rewards thing earlier in life. I never cared about the playing awards. - Point churning. - The point thing. I probably could have grinded it. - Yeah, you're pussy. - Yeah. - And you could have been making the yokes thing? - You're a pussy 'cause I'm making the yokes thing now. - I thought I was trying to get 700K Delta points. - Out of the yokes thing. - 500K, let's make it not to make it. - Sure, let's go back in, man. I'll talk about this one. - I'll be vulnerable right now when you said, when you started this whole journey of the yoke, I was talking about an egg. And I just went with it. 'Cause I'm a yes-hander. So I thought I was like, what are you talking about? Like, why is there an egg on the plane that he's like sitting on? Like, it sounds pretty gross, so I'm down. And then you pulled up that thing. I'm like, okay, it must be something like a cockpit. So I just flawlessly just. - You'd be lucky to become a silver member. - You understand how I trade your heart. - I saw a silver stuck iron flyer. - Would that be pathetic to get finally hit Diamond status? They let you know the cockpicking. You'd be like, oh yeah, I could-- - Where's the egg? - Where's the egg, guys? - And they start laughing at me and I'm naked. - Oh my God, he's never made it stink. Oh my God, dude. And I just run off the plane crying. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Don't you mean nuts behind me? And they provoke your Diamond status. - They take it away. - They take it away. - They have to. - You're nuts have to be up in the top. You can't put them under the seat. - Yeah, he puts his shoes up and then his nuts in there and he closes the thing. - He closes it. - Put him in the front seat pocket. - Just put him in his stuff. - They close it by Jesus too, bro. - Not for that, though. - For similar shit. - Very different. - For similar shit. - What do you mean like, who's fighting for again? - I don't really know. I think he did magic. He did too much magic. - And they were like, we don't like your magic. - They're like, only one man can have the magic. - Crazy, he didn't die again. - By the way. - He went back up. - He ascended. - He ascended, yeah. - Ooh. - What the fuck, that's bullshit. - He's God. - Not bullshit, bro. He's the son of the Lord. - He's the son of God. - He is Christ. - And he also is the Lord Holy Trinity. We're all caught up. - Okay, yeah. - So like, what do you mean? - Why do you guys have the first time? - As to show, like, hey, I'm gonna let myself die. - I mean, honestly he was on some Socrates shit. - The same. - He was on some Socrates shit. - Socrates let himself die. - Socrates was sentenced to death for being a heretic. - Yeah. - Not a petarast. - No, not even close to a petarast. - He was actually in the anti-petarast. - No, he was a petarast. - Little bit. - I thought he was a, he was like a famed petarast. - Yeah, it's a little bit of a petarism on the slide. - He was gonna fucking all in a half. - Sure. - He is a heretic, sentenced to death. And they were like, we can get you out of here. Escape on my boat and he said no. And then he tanked the death. - He tanked the death. - He be posting like facebanks, like little doodles in the notebook of NLE Choppa and. - Funny way to call it. - Dude, Epstein rip Epstein you would have loved rare cromes. - Dude, unfindable crome. - You know what he said that because Alex? - No. - Alex coined that. He made a tweet that was like saying banks where's only unfindable crome. That all comes back to Alex in the end. - Banks. - I just see pictures of him and he always looks like a different person and he's always in a different place. - I feel he always looks the same. - Yeah. - I feel like he looks. - He's always just got a different baddie by the side. - True. - You know what I mean? - I feel like his outfits are all different but they look the same to me. - Dude, Aden Ross and Banks and all of them, do they date girls from the same agency that they're all. I can play all the headlines. - Banks seen with Aden Ross' ex-girlfriend. Is there like seven people, you know? - Yeah, I don't know. I think they sort of conveyor belt that produces people that are willing to fuck Aden Ross. - I think they just knew each other that long. - They knew each other for ten years. - You could just call Banks and tell him like. - Banks. - What's so bad about you and Aden's ex? - No, you should ask him if he and Sketch were cracking each other. - No, I don't like perpetuating that. - I don't either. - I don't either. - The first sketch. - Did you see your age about a phantom? - Yeah, he's the third one. He's biting the wave. - Wait, can you show it? Can you bring out the picture of a phantom? - Phantom did it first. - It is phantom. - Phantom has a phantom? Then Jason bit his shit. - Dude, the picture of him with the car is so funny. He looks like dark Mickey. He literally can't see Aden. It's just a hood. - Like, organization 13 Mickey? - Can you find the picture of him with the phantom? - I'm pretty sure Phantom bought a Rolls Royce first and then Jason did. - Oh. - Face him by what? - No, he bought a Mayback. - Mayback Monday, whatever it's called. - Is Mayback Mayback Rolls Royce? - I don't know about Mayback. - I own a K-Trump Mayback music. - And that's, and I mostly drive my sisters. - I'm any Cooper. - I crushed a cannon through to Mayback today. - Maybe I gotta find it. - Oh, no, that's not it. - Oh yeah, they're making fun of his legs. - I think it's in that thread of pictures though. Is there other ones in that chain of pictures? I think it's the first one. He does this like the second or third photo. - Dude, that car's half a million dollars. - I'm gonna find it for you bro. - That is insane. - This is a $500,000 car for a car. - I'll tell you right now. - Yard salary, don't buy that. - Hell no. - You can't buy phantoms, that would be good, but there's the one with all the cars. He's got a cyber truck. You know he's not driving that shit. - This one fucking fried me, hold on. - Really? - He might drive the brakes. - What's the Toyota? Is that a Supra? So fun. - I don't even see where you see a Toyota. - I'm the right, no. Is that a Toyota? - He kind of squeezed for that right now. - I can kinda. - Oh, in that picture, is that you? - What, I can swing that. - This is on the swing. - I can swing that right now. - Damn. - He has a keyblade in the trunk. - So cute. - What the fuck is this? - That's awesome bro. - That's tough bro. - He's even got a Kingdom Hearts pants on. - Like he's facing a light. - This is the same picture that RFK Jr posted, or they posted a RFK Jr. in the war on protein. Can you look up the war on protein? They posted like today or something. - What is the war on protein? - Oh god. - Oh god. - Good fucking looks. - That platform. - Is it for how close we are? I got to piss in my balls. We could end, he said. - Like, give me a, okay. Not a second over bro. - He's just running away. - All right guys, well, we're spending time together. - Thanks for watching our weekly hangout. - Yeah. - Which I guess we just, it just needs to be weekly. - I'd rather do this than go to dinner. - A hundred times out of a hundred. - This is my dream. - I'm glad that we're here. - And your dream is to just tell me cattle. - Hey, hey, if you watch this for a friendship simulator, to feel like you have company around, you just know that it's, it's never any more than this right here. You're pretty much experienced. - You're basically experiencing our whole spectrum of friendship. - The whole spectrum of friendship right here in this room. - And I'm a suck warning. - It's not gonna be any more than this. - But they don't know which. - Oh, I looked under my seat. - It's me. - Check out the Intuit, though. - Dude, what if it's both of them? - Damn. - And you gotta do double dating. - Check the Patreon out. You'll be able to see live footage from the Intuit dome. - Jack Black, Jack Black will be filming courtside. We'll see you in the Patreon. Bye now. - Bye.