EP #177: Finding Calm in Chaos with Jett Bradshaw, Professional Kite Surfer

(upbeat music) - Welcome back to another episode of Everyday Endorphins, a mental health podcast focused on the importance of finding joy and happiness and daily living. I'm your host, Stella Stephnopoulos, and I am so excited that this is the first episode of 2026. Happy, happy new year. So we're like two weeks into the new year. And I know that a lot of people's new years, resolutions and goals fall off, but if you're listening to this right now, let this be a reminder that it's better late than never to implement new habits. So don't put too much pressure on yourself to do everything all at once. We literally just kicked off the new year. So give yourself the grace to actually track towards your goals for 2026. But speaking of newness and new energy, I felt like getting to talk to probably one of the most adventurous people I know on the show would be such a great way to kick off the new year. And so I'm thrilled to have Jet Bradshaw on Everyday Endorphins this week. Jet is a pro kite surfer from South Africa and we met on vacation. Well, I was on vacation. He was in Greece for work for kite surfing. And we met on this beautiful island of Tinos last year and hit it off. And I've been following his story ever since we met and felt like he's been using his platform now to really talk about the struggles around mental health in athletics and what it's been like to grow up with ADHD and kind of suffer in silence in a way. So Jet really is just a pall of energy and a light and I had so much fun recording this. I know there's a lot that you can all take away from this episode. So excited to dive in. But before we get into the interview, reminder to like rate interview this podcast on whichever listening platform that you prefer. Hi, Jet. Thank you so much for coming on to Everyday Endorphins. It is so wonderful having you here. Thank you so much for having me. Sorry, it took so long to make this work. So it's time to charm. Third time's a charm. I mean, it's a life of a kite surfer. Like, I wasn't even surprised when you were like, oh, I think I sprained my wrist or something. You're just literally putting yourself in danger every single day. No, when I said to the message, I knew you would understand when I was like, oh, here we go again, another hospital mission incoming. I've never broken a bone. Just for your, like, I, and that's my biggest fear is like fracturing something, breaking a bone, hurting my body. Like my mom for your context would not let me climb trees in Central Park. She was like, you're going to get a tick, which I don't even know if we have ticks in Central Park. But she was like so afraid of me falling and like, spraining my ankle or something. But we'll keep it more fun breaking any bones. I can tell you that's not a muscle theory. Definitely not, but I feel like it builds character, right? Exactly. Yeah, that goes to a point. And then you're to what we could say fun the first time. You know, I'll broke my wrist and you just kind of get over it. Exactly. If we've done it multiple times. And also, I have kite surfed once in my life in Greece, actually. I wasn't that great at it, but it's hard. It's a hard sport. It's super, super difficult. And you have to keep at it. It's not one of those things where you can be one lesson. And then chill for two months and then do another lesson. It's one of those that you have to stick to it. I'll see you lose it really, really quick. I loved it because despite it being really challenging, there's something that I found to be so peaceful being on the water and getting to kind of disconnect from our day to day. I actually did a water sport in high school. I was on a rowing team. So I was on a boat and it was a bit safer than flipping out your kite surfing and all the things. But I've always had an affinity to water sports. And for me, it was rowing. But that one time kite surfing in Greece, I was like, this is beautiful. Yeah. For me, it's just being on the ocean. We went on a paddleboard the other day, to a little ship-break thing. And there was no adrenaline. There was no craziness. But it was just absolutely insane being on the ocean. It's a special place. Yeah. Super special place. It's not for everyone. Well, for someone who has grown up in South Africa, the access to nature, we've had such different childhoods. So let's just start there. My-- I mean, what I'm looking at right now are really tall buildings, glass buildings, in the middle of Hudson Yards in New York City. I see a river kind of, but I don't consider that nature. You know, I-- Now as I'm getting older, I'm realizing how powerful and healing nature is. But that was like your whole life and childhood. So I'm very curious to learn more about your experience, like growing up in South Africa, what the culture is like there, and how that shaped your interest in getting into kite surfing. Growing up in-- yeah, it's super interesting, because I feel like-- because I travel to Europe quite a lot. I can definitely see how differently South Africans grow up and how differently Europeans grow up. It's like worlds apart. You know, I feel like when we were growing up, well, when we were growing up, so free, like so free, you know, there was no-- I feel like in Europe, it's all quite regulated and limiting. You know, when we were growing up, we were just permanently on the beach, permanently in nature, you know, wherever you go in South Africa, you in nature. So that was kind of if you didn't like the ocean, if you didn't enjoy an age, it was kind of, you know, but weird, you know, because it was so in your face all the time, you know, all the time we were at the beach, you know, going to the game reserves, going to-- yeah, I'm just-- it was beautiful, but tough as well. You know, you have to-- it's a tough place to grow up. You know, it's not like Europe. I'm just referencing Europe. It's not, you know, not as safe, not as-- you know, you can't just cruise around, you know, but I think that helped me later in life to be super, super, super smart. You know, I see a lot of people coming from Europe, and they're like, oh, you know, super casual, and you know, you can't be like that. I've always said, if you can grow up in South Africa, you can live anywhere in the world, anywhere, you know? Yeah. I feel like in New York, you have to also be street smart for very different reasons, but there's kind of like this-- the skill you learn to cultivate at a young age to be a bit more independent and to kind of understand your surroundings and not just like be super naive and lullaby and run around, you know? Yeah, and I think you can yell on the head there, we like, independent from a super, young age. Like I look at all the South African kids, you know, from like 15, 16, we were all driving, you know, we were all kids traveling at 16 years old, 15 years old, you know, and it's that kind of normal to us. But then when you tell, you know, I tell my friend's stories of me growing up and that and the eyes are like this, you know, they can't relate to the way we grew up. Kind of special to me, you know, because it's such a unique thing, you know, and I kind of brag to people the way I grew up, because it's so special. I mean, I've never been to South Africa. I really want to go, but my impression is that it's just probably one of the most beautiful places in the world. And do you ever feel numb to it in a way because you're so used to being there? I'm 100%, 100%. Like I still think it's super beautiful, but I don't appreciate it as much. But then I travel for like three months and I come back and I'm like, okay, this is home and this place is fucking beautiful, excuse the language, you know, it's every time I land back home, I'm like, okay, this is home and this place is insane. But you're right, I'm, you know, all of us are super numb to, you know, you see it every day. So you, yeah, I'm learning to appreciate it a lot more now, you know, and like slow down, you know, taking the small things and not, yeah. Sometimes I find that I need to leave New York in order to actually appreciate it. Like, it is an amazing city, but I really, this is all I really know and it can feel, New York is incredibly fast-paced. You'd probably do really well here because you're a fast-paced person. - Yeah. - Like, it is, it really tires you out and I found myself at times to like resent it and get really frustrated and like feel suffocated, you know. - Yeah, I get you. We like, we have a, here, the resentment is like the way the country is, the safety, the, you know, that's like we resent it and that way, you know, I'm always like, this place is so unsafe, you know, to an extent. You can't just leave your car unlocked, you can't just, and then I go and see, and I come back and I'm like, she's like, oh, those things aren't that bad, you know, they're not that bad in the air, compared to, you know, other things in life. You know, so it makes me think places makes you really appreciate it more. - Absence makes the heart grow fonder. - Exactly. - It makes sense. - I'm also like very curious because when you're like a teenager in New York, especially if you're in the private school system here, your social life is revolved around drinking and partying and going to bars and clubs. And then even people who move here after they've graduated college and they're of legal age, your entire social scene in New York is revolved around nightlife. And not only is it expensive, but it really wears on your body. And what I found to be true is that you're not creating depth in your relationships because you just have your party friends. and you're just getting shit faced. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But in South Africa, like, as a kid, when you're in high school, like, you're not going to the, I mean, tell me if I'm wrong, but my impression is that you're not going to the clubs and the right, it's not the same type of nightlife as New York. And so, if you like, there's like a closer bond that you build with your relationships as a kid and in your adulthood. I mean, this, you may be asking the wrong person this question because, yeah, my hometown in Durban, it's certainly different to Cape. So I'm not originally not from Cape, so I'm from a place called Durban. And there was growing up, it was hectic with the, the partying and the nightlife and that. But then you come to Cape Town and see how you see people, I mean, they like to party on that, but there is a lot more depth at a younger age to relationships, you know, where I just had, you know, I would see my friends at school and then those friends I would see on the weekend at a club, you know, so there was never really any, I mean, I had close friends, don't get me wrong, but it was never really, you know, like deep. And, you know, and I see youngsters, yeah, I've been like deep conversations and I'm like, that's so beautiful, you know, like I wouldn't do that. You know, like 15, 16 year old, you never have a deep conversation where I came from, you know, it was just like, okay, let's go party, let's go party. - Interesting. - Okay. One thing, you know, when I was growing up that I would have liked the norm, like doing that a lot more now, I didn't do it when I was younger, you know what I mean? Exactly. I'm speaking like I'm a 50 year old. (laughing) - Old, young, you'll be forever young at heart, but also old soul. - Yes. - Also old soul. - Yeah, definitely. - So where does kite surfing come into the picture? When did you get exposed to kite surfing? Was it in Cape Town or in Durban? Can you kite surf in Durban? Please forgive my ignorance with the geography. - Yeah, super luck, wouldn't, but I used to race motorcross, motorbikes, growing up, three, four years old, that race motorcross. And then I got to the point where motorcross is super expensive, obviously there's injuries. And, you know, my dad was like, come boy, this is like really expensive. And let's be real, you, like not gonna go pro, you know, it was like, you're not gonna, you know, be the best in the world. So let's try, do something else. It's a bit less more expensive, a bit less taxy on your body. And I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm just riding motorbikes, I'm just riding motorbikes. And I was like a spoiled brat, the only one around motorbikes. And I didn't really, I mean, growing up, I didn't really, like, froth over the ocean. I mean, it was cool, I'm good to have in the sea, but it was never like, I would wake up, it's sunrise to go and surf, or it was never like that. And then we went on a family holiday to Mauritius in, in 2018. And I was like a spoiled brat, I remember the holiday, like yesterday, I was just like, moping around, like me just on this, I was like, I just wanna go back home. And I'd actually go try cartif, and I was like, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, okay. I gave it a try and I was like, bad, we get home, we buy and cut, and that's it, that's it. It was like this, yeah, it's click, and I don't know, I think it, for me, it was the wind powering me, you know, always a petrol in my life, and this like, you know, petrol heads, and that's quite like the intense scene to be around. And the car changes, fall way more relaxed. And I said to my dad, after the first lesson, I said, that I'm, become proud of the sport for sure. >> It's so interesting that like, kite surfing, which is a very intense sport, I mean, maybe compared to like motorbike racing, it's more calm, but like, it's so funny how doing an extreme sport actually makes you calm. >> Yeah, yeah, for sure. I don't know, and it's the weirdest thing, people have asked me this before, and I don't know how. I think for me, it makes me calm because I'm permanently searching for adrenaline. So once I get that fix of adrenaline, I'm like satisfied. It's a good and a bad thing because up until a couple of months ago, I was just permanently chasing adrenaline in everything I did, you know, pushing everything to the extreme. I think it's a certain type of person that gets calm in those situations. You know, we're like, just things, for example, if it's, you know, she gets in that adrenaline situation, it's a bit like overwhelming for, you know, we are like, you know, I can focus and yeah, maybe operate better under pressure, as you're known, you know, put it like. >> Maybe it's like in adrenaline that you can control. >> Yeah, and freak out, you know, and just calm, we're just actually operate way better under those situations. But I think that's the ADHD and all of that. >> Yeah, I don't have ADHD, so I can't speak to the experience of having it, but I feel like for people who do have ADHD or ADD, like there's this need for, you're like constantly fighting your attention to different things. >> Yeah. >> And I guess when you're in that really extreme sport environment, you're forced to focus your attention on one thing. It gets worse than you to be very controlled. >> Yeah. >> And then being on the water, I think, in and of itself has like a very calming property. >> Almost saying, you know, you're riding up and down, you're ready. You don't even have to jump and you're ready. Like, I can feel it, even on very chill days, I'm like, okay, it's like a Zen place to be, which is so nice, you know. Because off the water, my mind's just like, you know, going at a thousand miles per hour. So when I get on the water, it's like, you know, almost a safe zone if you want to call it like that. >> So how do you try to bring that sense of peace and calmness that you get from being on the water to when you're just like on land and living your life? You know, when you're not kite surfing, how do you try to hold onto that feeling that you get that moment? I mean, I think it's probably flow state that you're in. The minute you're, I don't know what the technical language is, but if you're doing like a flip or like whatever it's called when you're kite surfing, like all the trips and all the things, like, right? Like, I can imagine that's being in flow state, like your brain shuts off for a second and your mind hasn't. How do you, how do you bring that into your day to day life? So that's where it all not went wrong, but growing up, I couldn't do that. You know, I couldn't transform that, you know, whether it be from the motorbikes or whatever I was doing. I was in the flow state while I was doing it, but it was so like 100% impossible to bring that flow state off the water. It was a disaster, you know, and I was trying to get that same feeling I got doing those extreme things. Off the off of whatever it was and trying to do it day to day, and it was just impossible, you know, and then that's where the party and that took over because that kind of gives you that rush that feeling of the drain of the line if you want to say. Yeah, it was super difficult and now I'm slowly starting to just appreciate, you know, get into that flow state, but I've learned to you can't always be in that flow state, you know, you have to also, you know, be grounded and like appreciate small things, which I wasn't doing for a really long time. Like I was just like almost none when I wasn't pushing delimits like I wasn't satisfied at all, like at all, at all, you know, like everything in boring to be honest with you if it wasn't extreme, you know, like hockey amounted, now I love hockey mountains, you know, where before I could think of nothing works and walk up a mountain because that's not extreme. You probably would have hated yoga that. You know, I want to do the breathing stuff already, you know, so it's like I think it's just that shift and you know, which took me a bit longer than normal, then, you know, the average Joe, but I got there. And I'm just appreciating the, you know, the smaller things, they're not chasing their drushes all the time and that was my problem. Irmally just chasing, chasing, chasing and it's a war on your head, you know, it's difficult, it's hard, you know, because it's satisfied when you're not just going, going, going. I can relate in a very different way in that I think I've always chased this need to achieve things. It's not adrenaline for me. It's more validation and like, just the act of accomplishing something, like gives me that, like, oh yeah, like I'm smart, I'm this, I'm that. You know, it's not a genuine, but it's the same sort of, if you're not achieving, you're not satisfied. Exactly. It's this lack of satisfaction. And what I've learned through hosting this podcast and through my own lived experiences that if we're on this hedonic treadmill of life, where we're just constantly doing things and it feels like it's never enough, we're never going to be satisfied, we're never going to be happy. And we think that happiness is like the constant chase of the achievement or onto the next, the next, but that's not what it is. It sounds like for you, kite surfing has kind of unlocked this piece and this like inner calmness or joy for you. But when you reflect on like earlier in your childhood and your adolescence, partying, like all the things that you were doing that were just distractions, what do you think you were trying to like escape from? Like, what do you think was the root cause of that dissatisfaction in life? Because objectively, someone could look at your life and be like, this guy has it all. He is growing up in a beautiful place. He has a loving family. He, you know, it was taken care of like, there's so much that was going well in your life. you had this dissatisfaction? Where do you think that was coming from? - I think it was a huge part of it was the ADHD. So I was diagnosed with ADHD at a super-young age and then depression, like a couple of years later, but I definitely think that the ADHD played a huge part. Like I come from the most beautiful family, I come from, you know, in my life, I look at it now growing up, but it was like the perfect child. You know, I was a spoiled brat, what I wanted, but I was just never satisfied. And that was for sure the ADHD, like I have conversations with my dad now and that and see, you know, maybe we could have, you know, worked with the ADHD a bit more, but when you, you know, when you're in it, it's a bit difficult to, you know, you kind of just scrambling to, so I think that dissatisfaction was definitely the ADHD played a huge part because I'm like super ADHD, like really, really ADHD. And I was a battle layer, it was a huge battle, the ADHD. Now, like obviously, still out, we'll never go, but I've learned to work with it. But yeah, with the ADHD, it's just that constant, like it's never enough, it's never enough, like just give me more, just give me more, just give me more, just give me more, you know, and it was, it's fucking exhausting, you know, living with ADHD because you just permanently wanting this fulfillment, you know, we're like my sister can delete during the day, put her feet up, she's actually downstairs now, sun-turning and I'm like, I think of nothing worse in line down, you know, in the sun. I'm just like your sister, all I want to do is bake in the sun. You know, I'm like, I think she's mad, you know, but, you know, so growing up, it was obviously 10 times worse. So I think that dissatisfaction was, yeah, just extreme, because of the ADHD. Do you feel like, so a lot of people struggle with ADHD? And I also feel like a lot of people talk about it in passing, like, oh, I just like, I'm super ADD or whatever, it's like very much like, like, you know, a bit of a joke about it. No, I'm not irritating me a little bit, to be honest, you know, because it can persons ADHD now, you know, and it's like almost a trend. To be like, you know, ADHD or I'm ADD, you know, but if you really live with ADHD, it's a whole different reality. It's a whole different reality and it's not something I would be like, hey, I'm ADHD, you know, it's like growing up, it was a bit like, you know, not embarrassing, but like, yeah, difficult, you know, because you always, we say, you stick out like a soul thumb, you know. And do you feel like negatively or like, it like impacted your relationships, your school, like your academic performance? Did you, did it show up for you in that way as well? Or was it more just kind of this feeling of like, nothing is ever good enough? I need to like, keep chasing something outside of myself. At school, like academics and that, I mean, I was, you know, average 70% and whatever, but relationships was like super difficult. Like I felt like I had all these friends, but I didn't really have friends, you know? That was so different to them, like completely different to everyone else. You know, so, the art was difficult to, you know, like I don't speak to anyone from school, like no, but anyone from school where I've got friends here, I still speak to the kid that they went to baby school with when they were three, you know, just because I didn't have the, I wouldn't say capability, but the like mental wiring to modern these relationships at a young age. You know, always in truck always, you know, banned from friends houses and that just because. What were you doing to be banned from friends houses? You think so? I was like the naughty one, you know, and I was the one who kind of rocked it, you know, and wasn't, you know, I would like if there was a group of us in trouble, I would be the one to admit everything, you know? You were the trouble maker. No, the trouble maker, but everyone was there behind me. I was just the leader, you know, that was the problem the leader always gets caught. Well, it's good to have leadership qualities as you get older, so that's a positive reframe. We were talking about this before in the context of dirty habits TV, this idea of feeling like a misfit or feeling kind of not understood. I think you and I both actually felt this in very different ways and social media makes it hard to feel connected to people. And another thing that I found through my podcast is that I think a universal human truth is the desire to feel really seen by people. I made a post about this recently around like what is it actually mean to be a good friend? And I was reflecting on how like showing up for a friend physically, like if they ask you to go to this party or go to this thing or like if they're asking for you to be physically present all the time, I don't think that should get you friendship points because if you're seeing like you can see someone a lot of times, but like how many times are you actually feeling seen by that person? Like those are two different things. Yeah. And I've also struggled with that. So I want to hear more from you how you've reconciled this feeling of being a little different than most people. Like how have you come to celebrate who you are rather than make yourself feel like you're an outcast or that you don't belong in a certain social. So obviously when I was growing up, you know, it was super difficult because everyone looked at me like an alien, you know, and as you know, my dad's also was super ADHD and him and I are like, we brothers, you know, he's my best friend, my best friend. So he's helped a lot with that, you know, to just, you know, over the years, my friendship circles got smaller and smaller, and now the people that I have in my circle really value me and it makes me appreciate the connections a lot more, you know. So as I've obviously gotten older, I've realized that maybe I'm not the misfit, everyone else on the misfits, you know what I mean? Maybe I'm normal and everyone else is not normal, you know, I think a big struggle I had was always trying to feel accepted, you know, so I'd always just, you know, do things to feel accepted, you know, although it would negatively impact me, I would do it anyway just so I could go to that person's house or go and be invited to that. And now I've gone into the point where I don't give a shit, you know, if it's not going to benefit me and my friend to grow together, then I'm not interested, you know, and now I've got three or four brothers, I would call them brothers, you know, where before I had hundreds of friends, hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of friends, but it wasn't like, you know, that deep, deep connection. Yeah. As I've gotten older maturity and that it's kind of, yeah, how to lot, still, it's still difficult, you know, sometimes I'm like, it's difficult being Jett, you know, it's hard being Jett, you know, because it's not easy in this mind of mine, you know, but it's like a lot of war goes into, you know, it's my dad, he helps a lot, you know, and sometimes you need that outside person to, you know, show you a different perspective because you can get so trapped into this, I'm a word, I'm a different person, it's so difficult, laughs, so tough with ADHD, so you need that outside perspective to be like, you know, bring it back to, it's not all that bad, you know. Exactly, it's easy to get very too close to your own reality and play like the victim, like, oh, the sucks that I deal with this, but yeah, that's the problem I had it as I was always playing the victim, you know, I was always playing the victim, I was always like, wha-me, wha-me, wha-me, wha-me, you know, and then obviously like I said, mature, you know, when you're 16 years old and always feels like everyone's against you, you know, and you like push back and then everyone, you know, like a tax more, and I'm kind of like, okay, maybe it's some things that I can work on that will help the situation a bit better. Right, yeah, I mean, I really resonate with like everything that you said honestly, for a long time, I really had this desire to be liked by everyone. And when you're doing things to be liked by everyone, like, you're going to be liked by no one because you're not going to like yourself at the end of the day, if you're overextending yourself. I mean, I would go to the ends of the earth for the most random person just to be, you know, liked, like, how well, yeah, yeah, or just seen, you know, so yeah, now I'm like, no, you know, I'll, you know, like, calculate situations, not, you know, I'm like, with that guy, do the same thing for me, if, if not, you know, then it's not going to work, we and my dad and my other thing, we, how you, you know, gauge your friends is who's that person if you stuck on the side of the road, who can you pick up the phone on the morning and they're going to answer that phone? That's a thing. And he kept saying that to me through my childhood and it was like, yeah, I've had your dad, whatever, whatever, whatever, and now I've got an older, it's like, go, that's a true reality, you know, it's like now of what like three friends that will pick up that so. Exactly. And you know, so, yeah, it's about the, the quality and not the quantity. And yeah, exactly. I think that to your earlier point, around for the longest time thinking there was something wrong with you and I everyone else is normal, but now you're kind of like, okay, well, maybe it's like all these other people, but I actually like know who I am. I think there is a lot of truth to that because a lot of people get stuck in this unhappiness loop because they're conforming to what they think other people expect out of them. They don't have the courage to like get out of the mold. And I think everyone has their own unique like superpower and beauty to them. And the sad thing is like a lot of people suppress that because they're afraid of how they're going to be judged by others. And I was like that for a long time, but I knew like in my core that, you know, I, I can be a little weird some time. I was like, I have this funny thought and I want to share it, but then it's like, I don't want to share it because I don't want people to think that I'm strange or whatever. But it's like the less that I actually give a shit about what other people think. Happy where I am. Like all I care about is my own perspective of me. And that's what matters at the end of the day. I think it's such a young age. It's difficult to think like that. You know, when you, you know, it's so difficult to wrap your head around, you know, that way of thinking, we're now, I couldn't have a shit with people think about me. You know what I mean? If you like it, you like it, if you don't, well, that's okay. I know we were also talking about how as a kid, you were always kind of seen as like, let's say, the troublemaker or the person that took all the risks. Like there was kind of this persona built around you. And similarly, there was a persona built around me as a kid that was like, oh, Stella's the gullible one. She's going to say something. It's not going to be that smart like, like she's the she was, you know, and then because that was a constant narrative fed to me by my peers and Fedora, you started to believe it. Yes. Yeah. You started to like act like that, even if you don't want to behave that way. And then you reinforce that. So do you feel like you were reinforcing this narrative that like just the super ADHD. 100%. Like I'll go to into places and everyone would be like, oh, JTA, you know, and then I would be like, okay, let's go now, you know, I must, you know, be the life and soul of everyone. And it's exhausts and Stella, you know, sometimes I just want to pull up there and be in the corner, you know, and just be quiet, you know, but I always felt that I had to show up and, you know, but I keep saying I always felt like I mean, this only realizations three months, you know, it's up until three months, you know, I was still doing that. And then I had one day, this like switching my head, where it was like, if you're not feeling satisfied, it's fun to do that. If it if you're getting satisfied in a positive way, you know, if you're walking out of those situations, game, that was exhausting. And I had to do that. And that's not good. That's not good at all. You know, what happened three months ago that brought you to this revelation that, you know, you wanted to start sharing about these things and you wanted to start now being vocal and open on your social media platform as a, you know, building your personal brand, being a professional athlete. Why do you feel like it's important for you now to start sharing your perspectives and your own struggles with mental health? I keep referring to this three months ago. I had a, yeah, I mean, before those three months, it was just chaos. My life was chaos, you know, like partying all the time, but looking after myself, not looking after my mental health, putting my parents through a lot of stress, you know, because obviously parents worry. And, you know, I was kind of numb to them being stressed. So I just didn't affect me. I would just go, you know, car accidents, driving drunk, you know, doing stupid things. And one night I was in a huge night out sitting in a kitchen with a bunch of random people at nine o'clock in the morning and I looked literally, now, as I come down, I'm done. I'm done with this. I'm done. You know, I'm, did you know who was in the kitchen? No, it was random people. Like random people I made at the club. Like I would just do that. All my friends would go home and I'll just say I'll be the last person, you know, chasing that whatever, you know, chasing the dragon. And I just looked around and I was like, I'm done. I can't do this anymore. I can't do it. It's not good for my mental health. It's so good for my body. It's not good for, you know, just my well-being. And I knew there was a lot of people out there in the exact same situation. In this community, you know, it's rock style, off style, you know, let's be real. We travel the world. And I mean, you saw it firsthand how we live. That's how we live all the time. What do you saw? Sitting on beaches, carting, drinking beers and partying. That's how I live for the last six years. And it got to the point where I had friends, but I didn't have friends. I only had friends on a night out. During the day, I came here, I'll go see one or two people, but it was, you know, not those deep connections and all those friends that I'm rebuilding now, you know, slowly rebuilding these, you know, beautiful bonds I never spoke to. And I was putting away beautiful relationships for shitty relationships because it was all about the party. And I knew there was a lot of people out there struggling with the same thing. So I was like, you know, I'd pondered on that posting that thing for so long because I have a reputation to uphold in this carting world that I'm a cart of the athlete. So I was a bit hesitant to, you know, because it's quite a big thing, you know, the videos are a bit intense, you know, for some of the followers or like young boys, you know, looking up to me and now I'm putting this sh*t show out there, it's be real, it's a sh*t show. And my dad said, "Fuck it, just go for it." You know, you're going to hold people, you might get negative feedback, but you're going to help someone out there. You know, even if it's one person to hold, you know, that's. And I can see it too. You absolutely are helping people. I would argue that in a way posting those amazing shots of you, kite surfing, it's very aspirational to younger guys who like want to emulate you when they're older, right? Like they want to be professional kites or for whatever. It's like, wow, that's amazing. Like that's so cool to look at. But I think talking about these things actually humanize you more and it creates less of a barrier between like the kids following you and like you as a human. Because like, there's not that much difference, you know? Yeah, and because I remember when I was growing up and social media first started and then I was looking at these people like they were aliens, you know, there's no relation to, you know, I was big into the motorcross, like I said, and I would look at these guys like aliens, you know, I could not relate to them at all, at all. And you're right. I think doing stuff like this, you know, that younger kid coming up, that stuff is from ADHD, that stuff is from depression, you know, doesn't feel alone, you know, because I feel like a lot of, you know, more targeting like the younger generation coming up, obviously, you know, everyone's dealing with their mental health and all of that and their own problems. And I just know what a struggle it was for me when I was young. So I'm really there for those, like, you know, younger generation kids that are struggling, you know, I've had moms and dads, you know, on my phone, just saying, thank you so much, like message, I'm in tears, you know, just like thank you. You know, it's a beautiful thing to feel seen, you know, especially online. I also think that in the world of extreme sports, doing something that's like very tough and dangerous and like masculine, like there's this feelings, you don't have feelings, you this, exactly. And that's like not healthy masculinity. No, and I was like, it's been like, long to be here for a long time, you know, this, I don't cry, you know, I'm a man, I cry when I'm at home, but when I'm out there, I'm a man and I, you know, can't show my feelings, I can't, you know, and I got to the point, well, shit man, we all are feelings, you know, we all, you know, and let share it, you know, that's the other thing in in South Africa is in urban, there's a big, how do I explain it? You're a man, you don't cry, you, you know, there's no feelings, you know, feelings, you keep it inside, well, super like you with my family growing up, that we were super open, you know, but I feel like it's, I forget it's a bit tough, especially and yeah, where I'm from, it's like, okay, you're the man, you're the alpha male, you know, swallow, you know, swallow those feelings and deal with it, which I think, yeah, but I was, I swallowed the feelings and it was an explosion, right? Yeah, you find that honestly here too, I think it's, it's a universal thing around masculinity. Yeah, you know, you're a man, you know, you can go out and send the super hard and strong winds and that's why, you know, why are you feeling this way? You know, and I had so many people say to me, but bro, you have the best laugh, why are you depressed? Why do you have mental, oh, you know, you can have ferrari's coming out of your ears would be super sad, you know what I mean? It's your depression doesn't discriminate. Yeah, exactly well said. So now how would you just like define masculinity? Like what is, what do you think it actually means to be a strong man? I think a strong man is, you know, someone that can honestly wear his heart and his sleep. For me, wear his heart and his sleep and be the man if it's in a relationship, be the, You know the protector, but also be able to you know, where is heart and sleep and if you know the times are tough be able to Say hey guys, you know, I'm back. You know, I think you're more man to put your hand up and sound backling then To keep it in you like my dad Full of tattoos crazy Whatever, you know, and he hey, we hug each other and crawl the time, you know And I think it's good. I think he's a fucking man list of man's outfit You're also full of tattoos. You're probably a spinning image of your dad Long curly hair do you like? Yeah, but I love it. Yeah Yeah, I think you're completely right. It's It's having the courage to be vulnerable like there is actually so much strength and vulnerability It's not a weakness. It's something that is as kind of so much strength and courage. Yeah, yeah for sure definitely You know, it's always yeah, but there is it starts to get me you know because I've you know Because I take like anti-depressants and all of that you know that people come into about it Come on man, you know, just put a smile on your face and you man you live a good life and it you know Get under my skin because it's not that easy, you know, it's not that and I think people That have made to a health think that way like come on you have a good laugh like why you you know keep it Don't keep it and I think it's really bad really really bad Yeah, I'm one in to just I think Any advice that's that's telling you to just like suck it up and move forward It just that's not good advice in my opinion because it doesn't value like your own lived experience It doesn't oh like allow for you to To express your own emotions like you can Have a great life, but still feel dissatisfied right and like you can be grateful for the life that you have and at the same time I mean no one no one on this planet Well, I can put my life on it is 100% satisfied. There's no one out there that is Okay, if I look in my life, I'm a hundred and ninety percent satisfied with it's impossible. I don't care who you It's impossible But if dissatisfaction why not just you know shared with someone hey Other I'm like battling with this, you know Mm-hmm. Just and Right you say satisfaction a lot and I think The way I would describe it as happiness because that's exactly what I explore on the podcast But throughout your life you could probably argue that there have been so many moments where you're happy think about drinking and being so happy and Going out and like I mean when I Interviewed you in Tino's when I literally shoved my phone in your face and I was like brings you in orphans your answer to me was adrenaline sex Heightsurfing and your family which I thought was very endearing and sweet That like sex event like that's why you know like It's like that immediate Like adrenaline rush right just like having meaningless sex or going out and like just it's worth these But it's happening. Yeah, but it's actually saddest action. Yeah that instant, you know Like you say at party that one night stand. It's that couple of hours of Being satisfied, but they're at the end of it. You actually if you started here in the beginning of the night at the end of the March you actually hear because You know you satisfied for that little bit of You know that brief moment Yeah I was doing a lot is chasing that satisfaction not like now like I want to be satisfied now You know rather than And I think that's where I kind of got it, but you know lost along the way because I was like always just wanting to be satisfied And didn't want to wait to be satisfied, you know if I wasn't that's fine I wanted to be satisfied now let's good drink a beer let's garden party. I'm satisfied Let's go sleep with someone and let then I'm satisfied We're now I'm starting to be a satisfied with totally different things, you know, harky amount and it's like beautiful to me You're becoming a Zen yogi just like me. Oh, no, I'm like it in the air. I'm dead literally you're finding your You're finding your sense of joy and to that point Jet like I would love to hear from you How you define happiness in your perspective? What does it mean to be happy or maybe in the language? You use like what does it mean to actually be satisfied in life be satisfied in love is I'm at the moment for me Satisfaction is just waking up every day That is me happiness is literally waking up every day, you know anything On top of that it's a bonus, you know Like that for me is There's some people get like super techie about happiness and happiness means that it's not happy for me happiness is back in wake You up tomorrow morning You know and anything on top of that bonus You know, I saw this thing on Instagram and it was a guy into video you may have seen it because it went viral and he said To this one girl on the street. He said if I gave you ten million dollars now would you take it? And the girls like of course and he's like put the the catches tomorrow. You don't get to wake up. Would you take it still? She's like no, he's like, oh, well, you're last worth worth more than ten million dollars, you know, so Waking up every day for me is happiness and like I said anything on top of that is is a bonus, you know, I'm stoked with that That's such a beautiful quote because it puts a lot into perspective like why are we facing Fame money recognition all these things if if we're not Living life and alignment with what we care about if we can't if we don't have another day to live What is it all even really mean? Yeah, and I think what's it coming from South Africa? You know there's so much poverty and stuff around here that you know permanently chasing these big things, you know, I want to sign huge deals with Sponsors and travel the world and that and I drive down the road and there's a car big you have the robots You know homeless car. I'm like come on, yeah, she'd like Only satisfied when you're getting all of these big things, you know all of these huge in the world going to do this but this guy's satisfied when you give him a dollar You know, so sure I've got goosebumps though, you know, it's like Kind of like you say puts it all into perspective, you know that Right, I think what we're talking about is gratitude. It's about really being grateful for The really small things in life like yeah, instead of focusing on the things you don't have Yeah, just like you know what you do have exactly So my final question to you, Jack I already asked you this in Tino's So you probably have an answer but maybe if you'd like to elaborate My question to you is what is something that brings you endorphins every day What is something that brings me endorphins every day? now my running Without my running I would be Going crazy Every day running is the endorphin high so yeah Every day I run at least five kts today. I did a huge four hour run And this one we At that stopping you're just going straight for four hours. Yeah, but in the mountains that Like on the troll that for me is like something I need that releases those endorphins that I used to get from Doing the bad things substances and all of that you know, I had to that's the thing with me is everything is the extreme You know If we get a party we gonna party if we gonna You know in a positive way we're gonna do it proper You know, so for me every day endorphins is running you know And my dog I got a puppy now. She's the cutest thing. Yeah. Oh, I love that and your family You said that you're thinking about your family when you travel brings you endorphins. Yeah Family for sure. I mean we super close, you know and just our coffees in the mornings We have a coffee every morning and that just when I leave that coffee to you do whatever for the damn satisfy Like my day could be over then, you know, I'm More than happy to go to bed You know, which is where you know before it wasn't you know Everyday endorphins was okay. It's 100 knots of wind, you know We need that to feed the endorphins, but not yeah running my dog and my family. I Love it. It's simple Serving let's just think don't try and reinvent the wheel, you know, everyone's that okay Let's do This and this and this and this to get endorphins and that No, just go wake up in the morning. Go for a walk, you know breathe and fresh air You know be happy on this planet Right, it's I think the wellness industry it's overcome modified and there's People are pushing product on you to bio hack into this and to that and of course it's where you want to optimize your wellness whatever but It's not even about that like think about longevity and the countries where people live the longest like It's exactly they're doing what you just said, you know, like they're they have strong relationships. They sleep they eat well and They take care of themselves like it's the basic Undemental building blocks of your wellness and your wellness. Yeah, yeah, and then yeah everything else, you know adds on top, but it's You know like I said people think you need to do the most extreme things to You know having ballstones and be satisfied and You know, just wake up in the morning, take a deep breath in, you're alive, you know, be stoked. And then go kite surfing and do an actual extreme thing. Streams going to give you more indulctions. Exactly. And on that note, Jack, where can my followers find you and watch all the amazing crazy videos that you post? Oh, Instagram and YouTube. Amazing. Well, thank you so much. This was amazing. Hopefully, we get to do around to in South Africa on the beach in person recording. Yeah, in person. Yes. Taylor, thank you so much. You're a legend.