Ep.119 “Sometimes the Signs Just Don’t Align” with Zarif Qadir

Speaker 1 Wow, you look just like my ex dating up disasters? Whoa, what up motherfuckers. We back on for another episode 8 now. Disasters, Real Deal. Phil the thrill. Yes, sir. We start right now. Right now we are back. I'm back from vacation birthday. Make all these landlords, it's criminal really? Yeah you know way I said they'll be a mother fucking yoga studio on the bottom Flow by the end of the week. Wait that's illegal. Well they lost a lot of all the landlord's that's a lot of money over the pendulum seem cheap when I got it. Yeah. Also and everything else and it is cheap because I'm sensing there's ain't got good bones in here. If y'all want me to be honest with you Monarch reality ain't shit. He coming New York. Don't don't fuck with them. I'm taking the head three floods in this bitch ain't never met. The landlord, it looks nice for where it is. It looks really nice way too much money, but it fucked. But a lot of shit fucks up at this place. And, you know, the thing is, when we need to talk to somebody, they never knew he wanted to fight. We have a fucking hole paper trail months of emails on answer. Guess when he hit his back to let us know, he was Raising it by 11:00 suck. My asshole. Ain't happening. So new beginning, man. The myth, the legend here with us today. Aloha, which camera my Are you don't look silly. Am looking at me in this. Yeah, we the camera's ain't even here. Speaker 2 Are you all right? That was me. That's why I said, okay? You had to like, how I was acting in the Drew Barrymore show. That's why I look Speaker 1 retarded. It Speaker 2 was Speaker 1 it was a fun day. Yeah that was you know a talk show. Okay. I've been on TV. We was on TV the first time I've ever been on TV before her due, to that dating show where we played. They are male. They are 28 million views and they didn't tag us. So, nobody ever knew who we were. Do you get the homie? But I read all the comments. The homies Speaker 2 to comment under bleh. Hey, this is Speaker 1 Rachel. No, it was like 40. It was like 15, 16 thousand comments. Wait, why didn't we comment and put our names of the time? People are doing that, which we did. Yeah yeah man I'm telling you but anyway well we got phileo. Hey, phileo. If I don't know, he filho is a comedian, I met some backstory, I'm phileo back why I moved here summer of 2016. I'm Speaker 2 Leo, Speaker 1 then we all know he was already at New York comedy club. You were getting I got there you were getting like I got a new phone so you got some checks spots and shit when I knew. So I Speaker 2 figured you guys in there fast because can I say yeah. And Emilio was like hey I got was really funny, he called me over. He's like yeah, you really funny where you going. I was like go home. He's like which way and I was like I'm going down and so he got a cab with me and was like yeah I thought it was no offense Emilio. I thought he was going to try to proposition me with something else because okay, I never really liked. Had a white dude. Pick me up and escort me. I was like this. Speaker 1 I don't know how to let this white man down. He's not getting his dick. Like, No, no centimeter. That is how your energy came off. Nothing wrong with it. I'm just saying you can't. I thought Speaker 2 it was some extra. He was trying to get some extras like I know. Ain't that funny? He's just a friendly guy. Speaker 1 Yeah, but then he was like I want you to work my club. I ain't never been so funny. I thought *** trying to fuck that's real funny and I'm Speaker 2 not interested. Oh Speaker 1 my God. Jesus Christ. Speaker 2 What happened? Here's what happened. First of all. Have a whole better drama than this. I didn't even meet these, I ain't fucking have these Speaker 1 bitches. I want to hold you down, in my agent was like, yo, Speaker 2 we should get like my age now. She was like, yo, we should get you on a deal on Netflix. I was like, they told they stole my life, they done data and Little Richard me. Yeah. And but this might happen. So I was Speaker 1 incidental. You have the same mustache. Apollo Creed. Speaker 2 That's it man. Yeah. But like 40-something years and then this is what happened know. So me and Julian me and Giuliana, we had the kid. We had the baby, her mom was sick her grandma. My ladies, my her grandma was sick, can we come you weren't back Speaker 1 a little bit? Oh yeah. You met her when throughout all the melodrama, you are Speaker 2 going over for that. You met her before that? Yeah. Before that. So I met her before. So, before you were accused of all this heinous activity throughout the world, all that sometimes, that's just a white light. Literally, now that I did, hey, Speaker 1 you know what happened with me Speaker 2 and my mom in, like, one of my home by close home Speaker 1 girl. They found out about it every bite. You don't hesitate, but I also shared it with people. Can I tell you something, right? This is this comedian from Speaker 2 me, don't let me, don't let me Speaker 1 forget. Speaker 2 Are you finished you finished and then I say so but I was like, what am I saying? I Speaker 1 met her before. Yeah, my hair Speaker 2 before and so that wasn't ever Speaker 1 if she was able to see through all the bullshit and see the real Speaker 2 you and I because that is the Catalyst as to why any of those girls? Even got mad because you have a scam in together. Speaker 1 No. Oh my God. Where's Speaker 2 my beautiful? No. Speaker 1 Because Speaker 2 Yeah. Go back. Speaker 1 We I don't think anyone really knows what we're talking about. First of all, they really don't. Well, I don't know if they will have to look you up. Hey, like see there? And then we find. But this management accuse my over 100 women throughout the world. Speaker 2 Probably more than that. Honestly, it was is what happened? It was 30 and then what happened is the comment the Speaker 1 comment. Okay. Okay, okay the comments. Okay. And that's 30 is still a nice Speaker 2 chunk into the. It's really not and there was throughout different countries in the world are Speaker 1 like he accident thousands of dollars. Speaker 2 H, which is cumulative lie or like each one? No, I would not be sitting here talking to you. You know how rich I would be? If I oh my God, you would have to go through somebody. Speaker 1 I mean, we went through a pandemic, I Speaker 2 mean, it's not, no, it's the law. So, I've had a lawyer and all that stuff because I got ahead of it because when it pop it, in pops, everyone, first and pop directly to me first. And so Speaker 1 over these women going to press charges is You got Speaker 2 a lawyer. This is what I'm saying. If anything, I did was illegal at all when I don't know if you know or you know but there's a lot of black guys in the world and I don't know any of them besides OJ who got away with doing something to a white lady in, it's not in jail or under the fucking jail, okay? Don't ask questions, they come and arrest you for doing whatever. So here's what happened, I This is what popped it off. So I was just running amok and do whatever and then people play, but why? I don't know if I if I make an excuse then that means I don't have accountability for Christ which I do, but there are reasons that led to it like in alcohol, you know? I mean, I had a real bad minuend. Always tells you like I remember I found this Speaker 1 *** you in Heart. Another Community are Speaker 2 found me next to a homeless dude. That's how far going on. Lean in fucking shit. I was like passed out. Wow. He was like what the fuck like so I was not in a place where I should have been dating a missing anyone, but I was and that's on me. Period. So but and I won't say that any. Here's what happened? Rachel, this is literally what happened? I was a player, whatever dating one, girl, and she was, I was like, oh, I'm going to go do something and she was like, I'll pay for you to go there and I was like, okay, and then the next one. Okay, and then the next one. Okay. Speaker 1 But I was dance, right? Yeah, but I was dating multiple women and multiple gifts. And so here's the thing like you so it looks even Only did three months actually in jail. He says, it's because yeah. Speaker 2 Where we at Harlem? Yeah. Yeah. It was stationed in Harlem that I went to because I was like, I was by my sister lived or she still lives down 115 so I was like I'm at her house and I'm like, I'm gonna go to the police because I don't know. She was like I think you don't need to do that. I was like why she's like because usually when you walk into a police station you black you don't walk out and find your own the way to write, not only way to be like, here's what I'm doing. I was like, yeah. But if I get ahead of it, she's like, get a lawyer first. I didn't listen because I was high and I went and did anyone. But it was cool because the two detectives who were still like cool, whatever. When I hit on this, how fucked up I was I'm hitting on detective, why she asking questions and Speaker 1 she's like, you're not just reaching Puerto Speaker 2 Rican and I just read everything that like it's so the male detective is laughing because he's like wait wait. So she bought your plane ticket but you didn't go. I was like I didn't go and I didn't know she got the ticket actually. I she said she wanted to see me and I didn't say yes go do that. I didn't go I was depressed as fuck and he was like this was around the time but I also have All my texts and stuff. So they're going through texts and emails and shit. And he was like, this is around the time and don't get that. He's like oh this is the same time you tried to kill yourself. I was like right. So he was like I see Speaker 1 like I didn't know that I'm Speaker 2 I don't know what he was like you have to he was and the female was like yeah I think that's best. She said you've not she's a based on this. It just seems like you've had sex with some of these women and then you stopped To them. And then that really hurt them or you'll add some of them on, like, whatever because you were bored and that hurt them. And now, it's an accumulation of them coming together because they probably all kept stalking your Instagram and she was like, what you trying to Speaker 1 do? That's what I was saying. I was, Speaker 2 you see what my stroke game is. Speaker 1 Can you talk about the drugs that you are doing? Speaker 2 I was only, I did a whole cocaine was like, like other people Comics have done and will do cocaine and it's laughable, me and there's a comic. I won't say his name because I don't know how he's about his sobriety right now, but we talk all the time. He's in New York and we talk all the time and me and him trade stories of wild shit you did. What? He was doing cocaine on top of cocaine and we just laugh because we're like wow man people really don't know that it's cracked. It gets a hold of your brain and you just is so much study done about it. Some people can do it and be fine but my brain was not wired to do that, right? So I shouldn't have been doing that shit accountability. I should have been doing cocaine and let me do the other shit, but I shouldn't have been doing it. You know what I mean? And just also, I don't know people in the world. If somebody is only sees you at 2:00 in the morning and you have to Uber them back and forth to do so to do drugs. And maybe fuck you. That's probably not Speaker 1 person. Yeah, I don't understand women's mentality. What do they think they're going on? Speaker 2 As I think they made out once he's like, I don't even know. She's like so these are just, she was like, she didn't want to say it, but she was like, It's like a fetish. I was like I think they have like a fetish for like a BBC fetish not like a weird weird old fucked up black guy who's like they can nurse back to health like Speaker 1 a loud. Like you want to save baby bird? Because any black girl that I mess with, during that time, maybe birds in would do Speaker 2 this to me, like two female Comics. I wasn't messing with either but New York was like, you need some water. Yeah. And literally is that you need to stop doing drugs, like to like, stop me. I was trying to joke with them. There's like, no, you need. I was like, oh, she Speaker 1 did any of the comics that you came up with and And saw all this happening ever try to help Speaker 2 a few people? Feel Phil has a story when I was supposed to do a show and he was like, I knew this, I knew you was fucked up because I turned the Showdown, right? I was like, you want this spot and it was Speaker 1 like, oh will you save me a spot? I guess Speaker 2 I didn't know. Pulled me aside and chill out. And not, because I'm doing nothing crazy. But he's just, like most people, especially black people, is like, yeah, this is a player that's all it is and he fucked up, so maybe don't fuck with him. Like, that's most black people or I would even say lemon like you, Raj are like somebody like a wrench entire project. Little project like anybody, I'm her go help the children build houses in Africa and then take the picture like the shot out. Wrap picture. Like, look what I did, that's what they like, you know, you never see them in a healthy relationship with almost anybody, let alone that even my therapist read through and she was like, yeah, this is they all need help too. She's like, who would spend this time to what is happening? So she was having a hard time wrapping her head around their thing Bowser where you can analyze them. Did you know them? I mean you gotta work, help me Speaker 1 so what so you Met the girl that the woman that you're with now, Speaker 2 so we met on a dating app, I was all over them dating, as we met on a dating app and we met up. She was like, you're crazy. I was like yeah, she's like, I'm crazy too. But what she did was immediately block all my bullshit like she just would call me on my bullshit date one. I'm like, okay, well, I usually, that's usually the easiest slide. I tried to do the Zodiac shift where you like, you know, she was his only excited, you wait to find out what her Is so you can match it just so you can fuck like you know Speaker 1 damn I never done that. You know, I got homework to do. Thank you quiz Speaker 2 Capricorn that mattress agitators right, you're gonna feel so connected. I know. Come on, come on. The stars of Lion-O that's real play out because I'm like nah, this is my birthday. You already know who I am. No, but Speaker 1 sometimes signs just don't align. Speaker 2 Yep. What so we met and then she was we was cool in. And what I see you like that about her. I like it. Also there was I was removed from the environment in that type of person who would tolerate, or even even fuel, that kind of be like, first the drugs got cut out like we smoke some weed and did some shrooms together, but the hard shit got cut right out. She's like, yeah, you know, like the literally no things I wasn't buying. It was being provided for me, I do. As it is in Speaker 1 New York, it was parties. It's I mean, they give cocaine We need more money. Why is that? I don't know. It isn't crazy. Oh no, I never even you see cocaine other places. But when I tell you, if New York is this like yeah, no matter where you're at. It is the it is the crazy shit. New York is a wild place for that and I was like y'all Beautiful People Koke like it. I swear to never been offered cocaine Huntsville. You ask somebody for 20 bucks. He'll look for you. They'll look at you like a homeless piece of shit like you can also join Billy. What the hell? Yo, you got a bump. They're like absolutely of course. Let's go crazy. Shit you've ever seen? I've never seen anything like it everywhere. It's like, Speaker 2 wow, ever and is rampant in comedy is rampant in comedy. Like so I was like, into partying with motherfuckers that I should have been partying with in places. I should have been like, not shouldn't have been, but it's like I'm already drugged up in. These are models of people doing drugs and then Everywhere else I'm still getting it free and something like that. So she that cut the fuck out. And that's why I knew I was like, oh shit, I'm like tweak it like because I'm not getting lean and fucking we in lean turns into heroin. What's the issue? Yeah that's what that's I tell people cutting the solid liquid and they thought I was going to sleep and I was just not enough. Yeah so it's like that type of shit but I am I so we met and then it was We hung out. Do you know, drunk played around had sex, did whatever I thought that was it and she thought that was it, but we kept talking and she was like, actually, you know, there's a she was like, I talk to you for that. We spent like the four days together. So I talk to you for that for days. She was a person under that Madness. How come nobody's ever just talk to you? I was like, she's like, I don't think that these women were serious. And because she knew about all the, she didn't join. They tried to get her to join their band wagon. So we have a text field out gave to the cops that The main one that made the post - she asked, she said, why are you what is this about? Like why would you draw a picture of somebody? Who you don't like, like that's a great picture. It's like he must have dragged you down amazingly because I like I wish I could draw job is hanging right? But she was like, why are you doing this? And she was like, oh, she's like, why don't you just leave and go live your life or something like that. Like why would you want to do that? She said, oh some of us just wanted to date him to study him in a text. Hey, I'm gonna sound like, slavery. Should just Speaker 1 date him to sold out here. That's where the Connie who that's where the Speaker 2 cops took it. Because it was like, oh this is a, this is weird now. So that's what I took. I took every message they sent to any friend who sent me a message that's like every message that we ever had and I took everything. I said, did I do? I need to get a lawyer and they were like you don't you just need to stop. Hmm, just stop being an asshole like sweets. So how much longer do I have? I was like because some of them have to catch up because some some GE. I might have went on two dates with never talked to Josh, Wesson, talking to me like, some months ago, he's like, man, I want a date with this bitch and she was like what are you doing? He's like I'm a comedian. She's like, do you know this Canadian failure because I want to date him. Joshua's like this like a third time. Speaker 1 He's like how much I was like, damn. I don't know your reputation across his seat. Like so this comedian, I met at New York, she was just visiting from Speaker 2 England, and I don't even remember her name is at this point, but Speaker 1 she is said something. And she was like, Phileo, huh? And I said, I said, yeah, I know Phillies. He was like, yeah, he's a scumbag and I said, wait, I said I said, what do you mean? She's like, she's like, well, he like bamboozles women for money and I literally broke out hollering. I'm talking I laughed so hard. I was like, wait a minute, I was like, that's a no that was a long time ago. She was like, no, she's like, that's why he's moving from London because we've started to hear no way. That's why I said I got to hear this from you. So let me mm Barbara. Walters right now, this is let me tell you, let me tell you, Speaker 2 there was one girl here in New York whose English. So also this wiii be finished. So when it this leads right to it, so when it hit everybody else is because I posted Juliana by never posted girl before. I never tagged a girl before I never followed any of them, whatever they follow me, whatever. But I posted A tag and like a loving, post you go. If you go look at the data act and then you go look this day to anything else, it's literally right after that, it was radio silence until that because they were still messaging and talking me up until then. Hmm. Right. That's why I was able to, like, with my lawyer was like, oh yeah, there's still mess. You're not even messaging back and girls is still messaging you. Speaker 1 It's a hard pill to swallow to see the man that you wanted certain things with and then he's doing it with another girl in such a small. All amount of time in like a week, I'm going through it right now Speaker 2 is literally is literally what my lawyer was like. He was like, this is why it's weird. I was like, right? So then, you know, whatever ship was over about the one one of the ones from here. Got a real problem, right? She got a real problem. So, New York yet, looking from UK, but she was living here, Speaker 1 okay? And this is the girl that you meant. No, no, no, no. I'll tell you, I'll tell you why, I'll Speaker 2 tell ya. So the This girl I'm not gonna say her name but yeah you know DT I have no idea Derek Thompson, Derek Thompson. Yeah comedian. Okay sounds okay hanging out with a fat babe. This is that baby time me and a bunch of guys. What are we doing? What are we doing in the bathroom? Copious amounts of cocaine, right? So much cocaine, so much cocaine. I bring this girl. So if that baby right I got to show you come sit and I gotta do this and then we can go do whatever we're doing and she's okay. And sat down and Next thing I know she's a bathroom and eat. He's doing lines off her tits so I didn't take her serious at all. Did I still fuck? Yes. But I did not take her serious. I was like that's it. And so she though got she had a real problem her ex because I got to Texas, just all there. She had promised her ex who left her for someone. So she was in the country. Illegally on a marriage visa. He left her for somebody. So she was like, give me all these other exit beat her up and off. But I'm nicer not because I'm nice. Because she's giving me cocaine. So she's taking that as more than what it is, she moves back to UK. I'm doing my seen properly in the UK, right, doing having? Okay comment, I'm doing whatever, whatever and then she fires back up, that's why any British girl, kind of got something to say, what if you look at it? Again, if you look all the comics I'll say it matter. Don't give a fuck industry. People who Actually matter, I work industry. They don't give a fuck because they do this, right? This is the word, she did really go to work, go clock in, and then the only people that had a problem. And I know who you're talking about, she's open mind coming back. She's a white over my comic on exactly these archival on here. Yeah, I know you. And so she's on the mic comic who I was, I've never, I've never had sex with a comic. There's no, I've never dated. I've never felt with comic, but he's to comments and trying to get at me and they young, and I was like, And that was a whole thing, so they joined with them other ones to be like, oh, he's just and that's why. But anyone who I had actually been working with and touring and doing stuff with was like, yeah, we're saw that. What do you think? We don't vet people before we have them do stuff, but it wasn't anything to wear. You should be cancelled or not have a career. So they still have me work anyplace that this like, doesn't fuck with me. The owner is not the owners if I look at who's booking. See young hipster, white girl. Of course you're not Never was going to be my crowd anyway. Yeah. Right anyway, that does look me. You pay me and takes me on tours, I'm doing shows him doing shows. Everyone's is black brown, Jewish people who are like my dad's words in that, you know Speaker 1 I mean not not saying Speaker 2 again that it's correct or that I should have more that anything other than, if you take account, I take accountability. And if your feelings are I apologize. But other than that, it doesn't go further than Speaker 1 that, but there has to be some accountability on their part as well. Like listen, I mean, yeah, I leave yours. State of Mind, drunk all the time. Like what are you really expecting out of people? I don't understand that you're expecting like to get married and have a white picket fence love, but I was selling that dress and I think Speaker 2 maybe one or two nothing on that, I was trying to get serious with but couldn't get over my addiction to do so. Okay? And so, like to take any to take life, Speaker 1 so fast forward to today. Yeah, where we at Speaker 2 now, I'm now I'm good now. Speaker 1 Have they for there's no lawsuits. There's no, Speaker 2 I will do not from any not from that direction but there's lessons from there's injunctions of things from my direction. Going out that okay. So that's that's because I was like because here's with a mine got cross. I didn't care because all that ever did for me was alienate people who wasn't gonna fuck with me. Anyway, like as in people was like the some of them saying people like you know, he's so crack when he was young. Did you know he was in a gang when he was young, he probably shot, he's been shot. So maybe he shot Somebody those same people were doing that, I was like so all that stuff I talked about and doing on stage was never a problem until now I'm now I'm like Boogeyman. Oh yeah, of course I sold drugs. When I'm from West Atlanta, you know? Yes I did. Yeah, I sure did. Yeah, I used to bang. Yeah, because that's what you did but I don't do that shit now. So that's when it got like we are because they start seeing that type of shit. Oh, you know, he was arrested when he was 14. Like why are you like what is that about? Like now you attack and all this other shit that don't have them do it that. And then, What what I what happened is, I had to start doing stuff because they put somebody's like, oh, this is his address. Oh my kid lives. And then they had stuff to say, like, oh his look, I feel bad for his kid, that kids not cute. Anyway, starting to talk shit about the kid. Yeah, it's like, that's, I'm glad we got all them screenshots and like, because that's why. No one is on your thigh. Yeah. Like you're gonna get your little white girls and little like, goofy white, guys, and guys who trying to, I had Is one Comics English? Comic was like trying to talk to me through DM's, right? It's me. Him and another black American comic into DM, because he knows it's like, American comic and he said something and he was like cameras and I would say his name of our team members name in the comics name is Brandon Brandon's. Like, if you want to talk to Phil just talking to you go ahead and I was like, oh so you want to meet up? He's like no, I was like that. Ain't going to say, bro. He was just trying to say like, you know, like Speaker 1 he was trying to get on the women's Speaker 2 side. I was like, I get you Captain for them because I think you you think that's gonna get you something, but I know you. Piece of shit because you don't know me, right? And anybody who doesn't know somebody who's going to attack somebody? No, no out. The blue at never met. That's you doing that for attention, not doing that as a real thing. Like because you would really try to figure out how to solve both sides of an issue. My side of it is that it's not really doing much and I'm apologetic and I don't think it's okay, I take accountability. If I did it, I did it but I'm not doing it now and so and I'm not been for a long time, right? And so with that, That's why I was able to get a lawyer and everything. Kind the law like is I posted a post and had to slide from the Coptic cop email and being like, Yeah, from what we could tell dog. Nobody's ever come to the police about you ever, but they said that online. We went to The Police Every New York England. I forgot to other places. I got them all, post it. Hey, nobody's ever came and said your name to the police. I don't know why they would say that and I was like, well do you say and he's like, you know, worry about it, you're fine. You my only record me doing it is me going and complaining about them. So the second time I had to go was in England, I have to go because that girl came back to England and she started kicking up again because she just mad that I'm shining I guess that's living with the detectives. Like it just look like she got mad that she was shining and then she tried to bring that back down because she's unhappy still, she's singling this and that not all this, her life's not going. So she probably see what I got. Which is what my therapist says. Would like your life and your family. You good dad and you chilling and doing whatever. And then she's like, I'm over here doing not, none of that she's older. So it's starting to eat away. I believe it's like well I got myself together but I'm sure she still does the same drugs and shit because I have mutual friends, right? Speaker 1 Have you ever put out like a formal Speaker 2 apology on my website on my blog on a podcast episode and one of my stand-ups on another podcast if Speaker 1 any of the women Speaker 2 respond the only did when I did an interview with this black female comic over in the UK was funny as hell. I did it think with her and she was just like same thing as you she was like, but she was and is still up on my YouTube. She's like, my thing is, why they lying on you. She was like, cuz I've seen everything So she was like, I'm not on someone signs, going to lie on, you know what I mean. She's like, just say what you did, what he actually did and leave it at that. She's like a lot of shit is lies and so that is they said something to her after that. Like, oh can't believe you did this podcast. She was like, of course because you guys full of shit and he's doing what he's supposed to do. So I'm not going to like not be this. Dude's friend or not talk to him because she was like, he's not that's I like he doesn't have time. Whatever you Speaker 1 said, gotta give people room to change. That's the other part bro. That's the evolved like People aren't the same Speaker 2 forever. True true. So Speaker 1 you feel like going to England was the right move for you. Like you Speaker 2 feel what happened? That's what was going to tell you. His what happened? We were gonna move back. She got pregnant and because my pull Speaker 1 out, she's from the UK Speaker 2 terrible as check, it free Speaker 1 dress. Is she from the UK office Speaker 2 from here in German, but lived over there. And then she this is the other people go like, oh, how'd you know where I was like. I know she's dating rappers and and football players and like soccer and all this stuff that there's a hydrogen. I was like, cause I'm funny. Comedy beats. All, I don't care what your job is to. Leave your girlfriend or wife around a funny motherfucker, especially not feel especially not feel happy. Right? It comes in and you some girl was with him, but I don't think y'all was together. Think she's just walking with you and he was like, yeah, go and get yourself some and give me a cranberry and whatever she's like, okay. And you walked over to do something. And then saw the comic brought this girl in and, and she stands next field and feels like, Speaker 1 if you can't see what phileo is doing, he's looking the girl up and down, which is what builds Speaker 2 and he goes, you In the girls. Like know it just kind of just met like we met online or something feels like interesting. Okay. So you're not really tied down. She was like really and it's like, yeah, they talked for a little bit Speaker 1 since. When do you care for girls? Speaker 2 Kind of stay in office. Feels like all right, what you want? Get out of here somehow. Yeah. And Speaker 1 what? That's why you don't put a fox in The Henhouse and Yuliana with all Speaker 2 that she's like into even today. She's like that. Some of the funniest ever seen a Speaker 1 model. I have, you know, that's why I said, I don't remember, but I'm, that sounds very accurate because I've been dogs, do some wild shit. Was I did that at New York like a couple a couple weeks ago at this. I was out there just having a drink at the lobby. I don't know if you were working. Was that? It was Speaker 2 that, I don't remember which location Speaker 1 but some chick was got in an argument with her friends and she gave us sat down and I was like, you drink it. There's oh yeah, we took two shots on that you want to keep drinking. She was like, sure. I was like, let's get out of here. Laughter, dude. No, she was with a group of but still, it was, but it's because I was like, yeah. Yeah. Every now, and again, when you coming on stage though, You gotta fire about you. You had a great set before. Then you assign a steel wall. Speaker 2 Her mom got cancer and Grandma had cancer. So we were told six months so it was like, okay, the baby came, she can see it. Maybe six months and then she'll or not six months like two months and then, you know, she'll pass on but she lived for six more months, right lipstick. So it's beautiful. So you got to see the kid and hold the kid and all that and what ends up happening is soon as she passed on our deal was yolks because she was like, I don't want to be here. No more. Like your mom's in Germany. I don't want to be in Europe. She's over. She likes New York, more than l.a. anyway. She like New York more than any other City anywhere. So she's like, let's just move to New York back to New York. I'm like cool. We Speaker 1 are. You planning to move back Speaker 2 here? No, not here, but we're moving but we, but she was Let's move mom passes a month after Mom passes covid. Lockdown two years, didn't go nowhere. Couldn't see what was that? Like their god-awful, Speaker 1 you think y'all just got off lock? Know they've been all right. Speaker 2 They got all. We got off before y'all. We got rid of Speaker 1 mass like then you put everybody back Speaker 2 they put it back and then the Prime Minister Boris who's like British trunk. He would literally looked like Trump like british-run. Yeah, the same. He was like, nah, let that shit out and let him out. Again, and then it was just an is no. Rule has been no rules since last year like no rules at all. Like it don't matter. No UMass, no, Mass no distance. No, they don't check. No paths, nothing. They don't get why we stopped doing. The only thing they do is they be doing that for a year or so the only thing they do is if you have to travel somewhere in your citizen like I'm US citizen not been vaccinated ship but they didn't care that you Americans. It's coming. Okay, everybody who's Cody was crazy over there because they don't produce. Like they get all their food from the rest of Europe and so they just did their brexit ship. We're like they left your like left, like Texas want to do they seceded and they're like man fuck y'all. And so your was like, fuck is fuck you. How about? No tomatoes? No chicken, no nothing. How about that? Wait, you don't, you don't have, they have stuff, but it's is all that so that was happening. So that was limited resources. English people. In general can't handle pressure like they cracked Immediately Under Pressure like they can't handle. No. Everything's an. Oh my. Oh like its immediate like a freak out. Like it's not like nothing really ever happened to him? Yes. So they vary in Speaker 1 the stalking innocent bubble. Yeah. Nothing Speaker 2 happened to them over here. So they Speaker 1 kind of just even even if you go outside, like there are states that. Are they do have it rough as New York, but I think New Yorkers have a different level of like being able to handle shit that other people don't watch it. Speaker 2 You've seen nothing. But what I just seen today, I'm homeless motherfucker, sat down on the train to just pee. And everybody just moved a feet and look the P trip. I was like England if that happened it hit somebody with the emergency stop but oh my God! Oh my God, he's a harmless bloke, he's fucking Speaker 1 pissed himself. Oh you gotta get some help, I love you darling. Oh my God. Speaker 2 You just like yo can we keep? Can we go? He just Speaker 1 he just let me be. I'll show you. Look there. Go. Let's go. Speaker 2 Let's go. So they can't handle pressure zone of the pandemic was a newborn is not know. Disrespect but it ain't the most exciting place in general. So the fact that nothing was happening. You like, oh my God. Hmm. Wait, are you Speaker 1 are dating apps as big over there? Are, they are as they are here, Speaker 2 *** Probably, because they don't talk in person. Like, if you want to train on the tube, what they call it, you on the subway. And you see if you guys have see, see a guy, he not gonna come up and talk to you and tell you that in New York, he not even my talking. Speaker 1 Have a lot of guys approach me on the street. I don't anymore. That would cause me to Which is what you have a fan of. Well yeah, I mean dude Hellcat call Speaker 2 them. Others ain't got to get on no post on character but they don't even. They got to be drunk to like talk to a Jamaican guy. Definitely gonna talk to you. Yeah. But they got to be drunk like just the English do just to talk to. You said he waited in tonight and they're fucked up and trying to talk to girls and shit. It's super weird. So they I think he's dating a way more. Sometimes you go out with you people. You just be chilling. You could tell they just met, it's like apps and it seems like most people are doing it. Speaker 1 Okay. Yeah. So there's some new. There's some dating terminology that I'm becoming aware of and I want to know if you can figure out what these new terms are you think so? All right, let's see. Speaker 2 Pinching pinching this date does not sexual this is day. No, Speaker 1 this is all dating. You know, you know exactly the right person said I've been chained. Oh my I Gotta See. No pinching a dating terms used since the early 2000s. Yeah. Refers to the act of keeping someone on the sidelines as an Speaker 2 option on the bench. Speaker 1 No you said cut off? You didn't say you couldn't keep him on the sidelines. Let me know you keeping him like at Speaker 2 Bay. Yeah like I'll respond to you when I need you to kick the ball into the goal. Speaker 1 There's yeah. If I call if I call start with so you can't see them. I want to see if you know them to give me. I mean I'll read them Speaker 2 out, all right. Okay, Speaker 1 what is cushioning? Speaker 2 Is that like like Pat like, making them feel good before you deliver the blow? No. What's concerning know, I use the word cushioning. Speaker 1 This is written by some six-year-old comes from slang dictionary. This is not like, what is Speaker 2 cushioning fill? This pressure. Griffin somebody's ass Speaker 1 out, those like, more cushion for the pushin. Cushioning is what we use to call having a back-up plan or Plan B. Basically, someone waiting in the wings back burner. Yeah, I got one on the back burner case, isn't that crazy? What is zombie being? Speaker 2 Rachel. These aren't real Speaker 1 words. There's a reason I swear to God. These are Speaker 2 real. Is that like ghosts? No. No ghosting is a zombie-like. But sobbing. Will you protect? Do you lie like you pretend to be dead? You eat bath salts. And eat the Speaker 1 bitch is crazy. Yeah, you're taking this way too literal. This is this is like virtual meanings guys. Like okay, if the person you will ghosted, you comes back in a more consistent way from the virtual dead. You've been zombie? Speaker 2 No, no. That's too much Speaker 1 Zambian refers to an x-ray of Earring and resurrecting a relationship. I love that y'all. Talk about white girls. Like you're both not with white girls, but I get out of here and this sounds like a hard cold. No more. Yeah, we're experts zombie. Oh my God. All right. One last one whelming Speaker 2 like well, Speaker 1 whe LM ing like overwhelm Speaker 2 like whelming. Oh just like they did. Like they are not over on the women. They just welcomed. They just made it a miss. Speaker 1 Whelming is a new dating term to describe a very irritating Behavior. No Aggie. Yes. Oh my God. Yeah, but that's not a term in regards to date is yes you can be Aggie about anything. Speaker 2 True. Okay. I whelming I'm never going to use none of this shit. That's crazy. Wasn't it? Speaker 1 That's it. That's it. This is just new for for new terms. I wonder if our listeners got any of them. Y'all listen, if y'all using these terms in your everyday speech, you probably have no hose to begin with just our listeners much. We like I'm over here cushioning. I do notice, though, speaking of that, Speaker 2 the black guys, like, fat one know that Speaker 1 y'all Chase ass for years and years, right? But I'm willing to mesh the two women that you guys are with do not have the biggest Speaker 2 ass. Speaker 1 Am I correct? Not Speaker 2 huge. It's at its Speaker 1 Her partner being a man Speaker 2 or girl's. Girl, I think that's that's a rotisserie. Speaker 1 Did she fall over white man? That's cooking me covering. Yeah, no not you. They want chuckle. They want a boy. I was like man I got that girls I've had one time where a girl said her sugar daddy we wanted to pay watch. Yeah and I was like absolutely not. It happened to you as well Speaker 2 but I've had girls but I've had Speaker 1 girls. I've been I've had girls Hunnicutt me where girls I want to watch you fuck my girl that's why I mean like that was like I can do it. If it's a girls, I'm not letting them. Man, jack off in the corner. Watch me, fuck that is. And that's some Django shit, man. That's some Speaker 2 Django shit is that's why I like lesbian, like a lipstick lesbian and stood in steps. Like I want to watch you fuck my lady. And I'm like, you you trying to learn my stroke? No. Because I know right what she was like, nah. And then later I was kind Speaker 1 of interesting point because maybe they didn't Speaker 2 learn no, she was The Trap. Oh I never got no lady who's like oh you know this is a one of the kids never threesomes and we have you had Speaker 1 a threesome. I've never had a 3-wood you if you was with you guys. I know I could early had a one. Some shit I could never do that. I could never lie about is what why you guys are both. So disassociated with the attachment that comes along with sex? Like, all right. Sex feels different, different people feels With the one you love versus the one that you never watch a person that I am in to be with another woman. I could Speaker 2 not couldn't handle. What if you, okay? So what if what if You he's out of town. Don't like you for like, two weeks on business. What are you asking me? And he was like, babe, I just want to fuck this one lady. I would wear condom. He's out of town. You can't get to him. He's gone. He's got business going to be away for like three weeks and he's like, it made this basket Speaker 1 to drive me up the fucking wall y. That is going on. You can't help me. He's just trying to get a mess two Speaker 2 weeks or three weeks. First of all, Speaker 1 that's gotta be the same. Speaker 2 There's three weeks, two weeks. Three weeks sounds like this Speaker 1 is why I never be in a commitment we because y'all cannot be faithful. Will some of the older? I get the more the longer I can go is a fan go longer time but about a week and a week of we can as long as I can go. Now, Gonna have sex with another dude. What are you going woman? Do you want to have sex? Another dude, if he's gonna do it I'm gonna do know. You don't want to do it is by? Yeah, sure. What's good for? The goose is good for the gander. This is why you alone right now. Those not alone. I'm alone because I want to be alone, that's against by you Speaker 2 alone. Speaker 1 Some type of goose is some type of. It's a mailman. Oh, yeah. The mail Speaker 2 Goose or something like that. So that was a drink. No, that's a duck Mel. Speaker 1 Anything left? We want to say, gotta have three to let didn't, I don't have to have threesomes look at to do what you say. Speaker 2 Absolutely. Speaker 1 One last question before we get out of here as a kid. Did anyone call you Filet-O-Fish? Speaker 2 Yes, all the time everybody. This fellatio fellatio all that and your mama come back. I usually yeah, your dad's create them. Speaker 1 Not your dad, not your mom because I'm your come back in the day you suck. They daddy's dick. Do the things that suck my dick. Oh my God. Speaker 2 It's nice to give Speaker 1 everybody, your all your socials and all that stuff, Speaker 2 okay? You don't Speaker 1 have to. Yeah, you know what? Speaker 2 Actually go to Amazon Prime and I have two specials on an, especially mixtapes, but go watch them both on Amazon. Prime, if you type my name, Amazon Prime, I got to Speaker 1 mix. All right. So wait what Speaker 2 I'm doing? Okay, separate hours on Amazon. Prime, Speaker 1 y'all know it is. It's duck. Y'all be good. All right, you feeling Do you have crazy stories? We want to hear them, you can either. Let us know what I John R IG page. Speaker 2 You can hit us on our fucking Speaker 1 hit us up on our IG page dating app disasters, Speaker 2 or on dating app disasters, podcast, at Speaker 1 gmail.com and system of nasty shit. Y'all know what y'all like to hear.