EP 103: The Reality of Being Half Loved

0:00 And if you're in a halfway love, that's not real love because they're making you believe. They're making you hope that there is a future, that they will choose you someday, that it's going to happen. 0:17 But it really never will. It really never will. 0:37 Hey guys, welcome to another episode of the Baritol podcast. So we have another solo episode today and Baliknam and Taiyosa love topics love topics and this one online and based in some past episodes, Namin and Diamond episode. 0:59 Let's talk about the halfway love Odeba title. Palang Mejo alumni. So halfway love. So halfway love. Basically, it's someone that gives you just enough love quote UN quote to keep you around, but it's not enough to make you feel seen, valued or chosen. 1:28 Actually, all of the above. They don't make you feel chosen, valued and loved. But I'm also they don't make you feel secure. There's no sense of security because you don't feel chosen. So halfway love is just the sum. 1:47 I feel halfway love is convenience. It's basically a Masan Casadito is you mistake it for love. They love you but not enough to commit to you, not enough for them to choose to have a life with you. 2:05 They love you just enough to keep you around. Part about halfway love case ikao. Although on the other hand and the receiving end of that is that Ikao Mahala Mahal mozila young manga receiving end netong halfway love. 2:22 Are the people that actually love 100% Celena, Manalena, Nella, Hindi or Hindi? 2:38 Because if you are an option, is that really love at all? If you are just a choice, is that really love at all? If they can't make up their mind about you, is that really love at all? 2:55 Parang. I really don't want to seem to be judgmental of this topic, but it's more of like or word, not choice. 3:13 It means preferences, so you'll keep them around. 3:34 If you're the person that's on the receiving end of it, you're going to start to doubt yourself a lot. Yeah, you're going to start to doubt yourself a lot because you're thinking namiku Lang sayo maimali sayo Casa Hindi canila Hindi, canila pilipile or bahat Hindi enough you they'll sprinkle a little bit of effort and then pull back. 4:01 Or Pak Tata long in Mona sela ano tayo. It's not enough. 4:36 But if it's not enough, it's not you. It's not a you problem, it's a them problem. And I really don't want to define this as love because if you can't love someone 100%, then you shouldn't be with that person at all. 100% meaning if you're not all in, what the hell are you doing there? 5:07 What the hell are you doing if you're not 100% all in with the person? Or you're just waiting for someone that fits to your standards and then you leave them. 5:32 It's so cruel to love someone halfway and make them feel like they're not enough to make them feel apparent. There's like a mental mental health. 5:54 You're blaming yourself. You're constantly. There are some people who constantly change themselves or they feel out there's something wrong with me. But you type. Yeah. So you try to fit into their type. Para para pili Inca de la pero Hindi para enough. 6:13 Or you mold your character into them so that for you, they'll finally see you and choose you. But then, you know, I Manila hat. Benige. Manila hat Hindi paden you did everything that you could to be chosen, but you forgot yourself in the process. 6:35 Yun palang, the fact that you're trying to fight for a spot in someone's life. Dun palang red flag nayon Dun palang da pat Hindi munayun ginagawa. If someone loves you 100%, loves yuha 100%, you shouldn't fight for a spot. 6:54 You cannot keep fighting for something that you should be given naturally or freely. Love should be given freely and naturally. So if or you're fighting for that love, you're fighting for that person's love and affection. 7:11 Yun palang malina. Yun palang Malina Yun Palang NASA for me NASA toxic relationship Canon auto pageant beauty queen. 7:31 You shouldn't fight for your spot that's supposed to come naturally. That person should just love you because they love you, because they want to be with you, not because or not because. 7:48 And then you'll be left with so much doubt, so much regrets, and so much resentment in your heart because you did everything that you could for this person to love you and they never did. 8:06 They never could choose you. But how come it's so easy for them to choose others and not choose you? You shouldn't because in the 1st place, you should not have been in that position in your life. 8:22 You allowed it to happen. You're so you're also at fault. 8:38 Qasalan and Mudin. Because The thing is, you know what you deserve? You know that Hindi would deserve mahafui love. Hindi would deserve nawa param Damananganian. But you stayed luma banca paren. If one day Mahiki Tanya that I've always been here and then he'll choose me. 8:59 Oh my God, what if that day never comes? Chances are it ever does. If it already started with halfway love, it will end with halfway love. That's the sad truth about this episode. 9:15 I hate that I have to, you know, I have to. I always have to be, you know, every time I read comments or let's say comments means do I really have to talk like that? 9:30 Do I really have to say it that way? But then again, maybe, if maybe I really do have to be tough, maybe that's my my, my purpose in this life. 9:46 So I'll take it. OK, so Baron pedito ESA ESA Cosa Eno. OK, so sabe dito. 10:02 The worst kind of heartbreak isn't isn't when someone doesn't love you at all. It's when someone loves you just enough to stay they love you halfway. Oh, the BA. So basically Kappa kahin Dina workout is a halfway love paginina workout a halfway love the BA. 10:23 My heart broken but technically it's so hard to grieve something if you don't really know what. You're grieving one boyfriend in Tao in the 1st place mostly you know why you're grieving it. 10:45 You're grieving the part of you that got lost in that relationship in that quote UN quote relationship. You're grieving the the effort that you've put in, the fact that you've changed so much of yourself to win someone's love, and the fact that you hope that one day they will choose you. 11:10 But more so, you don't really grieve. You grieve the person, yes, but more so you're grieving yourself because a part of you dies every time you, every time you give yourself to a person and every time you try to change yourself to fit into someone's standards, which is not who you are. 11:31 A part of you dies because Bini Bigaimuyum partner Yun Sasarillimos, a bank Tao that don't deserve it. So you grieve that. You grieve the parts of you that you have given to someone, most especially if you've given all of you to someone that only loved you halfway. 11:51 So that's what you grieve. 12:06 Wasting my time on someone. And yeah, time on wasting on someone. But a little bit the Baja, if I stay a little bit longer, if you know, I spend more time with the person, maybe he'll see that I'm actually a I'm great. 12:39 He might actually see that, you know, I'm a hatch. But then I caught myself towards the end of that situation ship. I would say that why am I waiting for someone to see that I'm a catch? Why am I waiting and staying in this in this situation where I have to convince this person that I'm a catch to deserve to see? 13:10 I know I'm a catch. I know what I can, how I know how much I can give in a relationship. I know I'm capable of loving. I know that I'm the serving and yet I'm trying to make this person see that I'm a catch. 13:27 It's so sad. Like why am I doing this to myself? If I'm a catch, someone is going to see that I'm a catch without having to convince this person that I'm a catch If but feeling confidence level unique to say I just got out of a relationship that time and I really didn't have that much confidence in myself so or attention or validation. 14:09 If this person makes me feel insecure, I'm not for the right person, then then I'm in a situation that I stayed. 14:26 If I'm not mistaken, I think I was seeing this person for six months. So, so six months that I was seeing this person or had some sort of a situation ship with this person, I felt very insecure. I felt very small and yet I was trying to convince him that I was a catch. 14:45 So it's very contradicting. Not parang. I was trying to prove something, but that's not how I felt. I felt like I was so small and I felt like some sometimes degraded. 15:00 So parang. Very disappointed because I should have known better because I already came out of a relationship that made me feel all of those things. 15:16 So why am I trying to put myself in another position? Am I just going to be that girl forever? Am I just going to keep putting myself in situations that I'm always going to feel like that? 15:31 And then I met someone who made me feel like I'm a catch the moment I met him, who made me feel that, even if I wasn't a catch at that time. That's the thing. I met someone who made me feel like I'm a catch, even if I wasn't. 15:49 Because when he met me, I was a freaking wreck. I was a mess. I was not in a good place in my life, but he still thought I was a catch. So that made me feel very confident with myself. 16:05 Now. Oh if this person thinks I'm a catch then maybe I am and maybe I should be. I should be a catch for myself. So been a confidence go. I started to love myself more, prioritizing myself more self love. 16:21 I, I, I started to realize that oh, this is what I deserve. I deserve a love that makes me feel that I'm a catch, that I'm beautiful, that I'm worthy to be treated like this. 16:40 And it really changed a lot of myself moving forward to this day. It really made me feel that, oh, I can't do anything and I can be anything because someone sees me this way. 16:56 You know what if if you always catch yourself crying, depressed, you feel alone, you feel unworthy, you feel insecure, you feel small. 17:20 That's just the hard truth. 17:39 So if that's how they see you, that's how they see you. That's the hard part. That's the sad truth. 17:55 That's how they make you feel. And for me, it's so sad to waste so much time in relationships that make you feel all of those things. If you could be loved right by someone else, that makes you feel confident, feel more Princess treatment ka feel more spoiled ka film on ganda gandamo or on guapo guapo more like ansarap mahalinanganon na Hindi mukhailani alter young sari limoto someone else. 18:26 Because they love you just just exactly who you are. They love you for who you are. They met you like this and they love you like this. They don't want to change anything about you. For me, that's the kind of love that gives you peace. 18:43 If you are in a relationship and you don't feel safe and you don't feel at peace, you feel chaotic inside, feeling more. You never know where you stand in someone's life. You're not in the right kind of love if a person cannot love you freely like how you deserve or naturally or you're wasting time. 19:14 You're wasting so much time and normally guys, if very fixated on one person, I'm very sure, I'm pretty sure you're going to hate on this highlight or this episode because you're so in denial that you're in one. 19:50 But after this episode, I know, sorry, I had to say it. Somebody has to, because who will? 20:09 You're wasting time, and for what? Is it really worth it? You're waiting for this person to love you the way that you deserve. 20:28 Why do you have to wait? Why do you have to wait if love should just be given freely? 20:47 Oh my God. Oh my gosh, that day. You're wasting so much time with a person. 21:02 Oh my God, life is too precious to waste your time on assholes, that's for sure. That's for sure. OK, so if someone is unsure about you, I advise that you shouldn't. 21:23 I advise that you don't be unsure of yourself. That's one thing that you should not be unsure of, and that's yourself. If this person is making you question everything, that everything that Makes You Beautiful and everything that makes you who you are. 21:42 And you start to question if you're pretty enough, if you're smart enough, if you're good enough, if you're worthy enough for his love and it's it's, it's not worth it. Alam yogais kapag. 22:00 If you think about it, we always just choose to put ourselves in situations that that do this to us. 22:26 Hindi or Hindi to be honest, right or wrong in between, La Gina 10 pini pile the magduelza in between. 22:58 The difference between right and wrong. We're always in the middle. We always fight for it and always say no, no, they're going to change. No, they're going to love me. No, they're going to see how how great I am. Oh, they're going to see what? But in retrospect, you already knew what you should have been doing or what you should have done in the 1st place, which is not to be with that person. 23:19 But no, we don't like easy. Humans don't like easy for some reason. We like a challenge. For some reason. We always want to challenge ourselves. We always want to go in deep with all of this crap. 23:35 Never again. So I feel like at the episode that will revolve around Seguro making you realize that you know, there there is such a thing as real love. 24:01 And if you're in a halfway love, that's not real love because they're making you believe, they're making you hope that there is a future, that they will choose you someday, that it's going to happen. 24:18 But it really never will. It really never will. And for some people that will comment, tapos, tapos like end up coming together. 24:38 Do you feel happy? Are you secured? Do you feel safe? Does he make you feel like you're the most beautiful person on earth? Does he take care of you or does she take care of you? How is that relationship going, Bhagoba? 24:56 Do you feel like it's that kind of love that makes you feel like home, secure, happy, confident? Or do you feel like he just settled Because Nah, I was just saying because you waited too long. 25:16 I hope you answered this question. I hope you answered that question and if you decide to share it with us, please do. I love reading comments. I really love reading your comments and your stories. 25:32 We will actually dedicate an episode reading your stories. 25:57 But you know, there are these are some factors that these are some factors or reasons why people stay in halfway love. Some people would rather see the potential of what they could be instead of seeing the patterns. So sometimes potential, sometimes daydreaming, 26:28 you see the potential of what they could be, but not who they are. Talagang Impossiblyan But if you're in love with the potential, then yes, there is a high chance that you will really fall in love with a person because you're seeing a different person in them. 26:51 You want to see that kind of person in them, so you're waiting around until they become it, until they become that person you wish that they become, but you choose to to ignore the patterns. 27:08 That's the thing, guys. The patterns are what we have to start looking at because sometimes the patterns are hard to break. In this, there's a term, it's called break the pattern because there are some patterns that move generations. 27:28 It's a, it becomes a generational thing until someone breaks it. So if you choose us to just, if you choose to see the potential and not the pattern, what you're doing now is the pattern still continues. It will never change. No one is breaking the pattern because you're still busy day dreaming about their potential. 27:48 That's the thing. That's the thing. And sometimes you also just hold on to the memories. Memories, little memories, or little times or little moments. 28:37 Let's say I like stickers. 28:56 Three AM 4:00 AM, One week after. 29:22 Sometimes you just need to analyze. You cannot see the bad if you you cannot see the bad if you always choose to just see the good. It has to be both. It has to be balanced. You have to see both sides. 29:37 Does the good. Must Marami banggood kesa so bad or must Marami bad kesa so good? Scale muyun bang easy pan muyun. You can never turn back time. 29:59 That's the sad part about it. You can never turn back time. And how do you even spot what? What does halfway love look like anyway? Halfway love is basically a person one giving you mixed signals. 30:14 So either today saw brown suite Nella sayo minibian Nella 100% attention Nella sayo Buja Swalana silence message until how many days you even Taho? 30:30 Not even Taho most of the time they're very inconsistent. They don't really show you consistent effort. So one week straight, good morning, one week straight the next week, very inconsistent. 31:21 So the during that day, during that day, priorities, priorities and effort go hand in hand. 31:50 If you're not a priority, they will not exert effort, They will not show effort. That itself is already a sign. Inconsistency is always a sign. The red flag they can say. 32:22 So basically since inconsistent or message. 32:38 So let's see today message Message after two weeks I. 33:11 After two weeks, basically halfway love when it's convenient for the person to give you love when they feel like giving you love. 33:43 It's not an everyday thing, it's not a comforting love. It's not love that makes you feel safe. It's not love that gives you peace. Halfway love your or lucky company anxiety done you're always anxious because you never know what you're going to get. 33:59 You're never going to know if the message cabana today, tomorrow or that's the thing. Why do you keep fighting for something that's not there? 34:15 But it's so hard to always fight for something if the other person is not even willing to commit or to give you 100% or to even be with you. Imagine there are halfway loves that reach for years. 34:31 Years. And you know why it teaches years? Because the person still doesn't want to give it up. The person feels that 34:53 one day. That's the thing, it's not indicia it takes 2 to T1 is leading that relationship. 35:14 You're forced to move on after what, Wasting how many years of your life? It's so sad that some people have to move on from relationships that wasn't even a real 1. 35:30 It's so sad to know that there are some people who grieve situation ships or who grieve halfway love and they don't even know what they're grieving. 35:46 For how many years or for how many years my girlfriend or my boyfriend, like stop putting yourself in situations in Ala Mona. 36:04 At the end, it's nice to be loved well. It's so nice to sleep well at night knowing that you're loved when you wake up and you're loved when when you're about to sleep. 36:20 It's so nice to be at peace guys. Partner anxious panic. You can trust the person. 36:39 They never make you feel like you have to worry to be with someone that gives you so much anxiety. 36:58 So if you are in this predicament and you feel like. If you want to break free from it, that's the beauty about it. If you want to, if you want to really talk about the pros of this, if you want to break out from it, you can because you're not really in a fully committed relationship. 37:21 So you really can get out of it, free yourself from that kind of love and actually, you know, out there, you know, I'm not telling you to just go around and figure it out. 37:44 It's just let it come. When it comes, it will come. Real love waits. Real love comes on its own. It comes naturally. You don't have to find it. Some bar hoping like yeah, it happens sometimes, but again, in random moments, not because you're forced to meet someone or very rare times that happens, very rare times that happens or they are. 38:12 There are very successful stories of that, but always just keep an open mind and an open heart. And if you are in a halfway love right now and you're watching this episode, it means or until wasted so much time on this person. 38:42 That's why, that's why we make episodes like this, so that if this lands on your feed, then maybe it had the land there. It had the land in your feed. Because this is what you had to hear. And I hope it does get to you because you deserve a love that makes you feel beautiful, doesn't make you feel insecure. 39:01 A love that makes you feel safe, secure, not anxious, not scared, not chaotic. You don't deserve a love that makes you feel like you're not enough. You're not enough. 39:18 You want a love that makes us feel that you know it will find you. 39:33 And when it does, I'm telling you, you're going to realize why that person had to go passerby theory to make you feel that 40:01 Hindi. Treatment tolerate this is not love. 40:20 This is not love if NASA halfway love by choice. So I hope you guys, I hope you guys if if you're going through this, I hope you resonate with this video with this episode. 40:42 I hope that you really, really think and reflect and think about yourself. Don't be unsure of yourself. This person is unsure of you. Don't be unsure of yourself. That's the one thing that no one can take away from you. Do not let anyone take that away from you. 41:01 Always be sure of what you are and who you are, and someone who will love you the way that you deserve will love you exactly for who you are. They will never try to change you and they will never make you feel small. 41:16 There is a lot of peace and happiness that come with real love and I hope it finds you. I hope you guys enjoy this episode and I'll see you guys on the next one. Bye.