Earthquake Gets Real About Comedy | Whiskey Ginger

What up whiskey ginger fans. Welcome back to whiskey ginger a wave series. Hey, tonight, tonight. I'm in Hanover, Maryland. Come on out, Baltimore or anybody in the surrounding area. Come out and see me the hall at live tomorrow. I'm in the Borgara at Atlantic City, New Jersey. Then I'm in back to Southern California by San Diego at the Harrison Valley Center. Then I go to Canyonville, Oregon for lovers day, February 14th. Bad friends is doing one show up there in Lincoln, California by Sacramento. Then I'm at the win in Las Vegas, Viva, Las Vegas. Then I'm at the Little Rodifest out there in Providence at the end of March. Come see me at Andrewsantino.com. Those tickets are at Andrewsantino.com. In here, we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey. Oh, that creature in the ginger fans. Sturdy, ginger, like that has the ginger gene is cut. Ginger's up. You won't be five dollars for the whiskey, 75 dollars for the whole. Ginger's our hell now. This whiskey gives excellent. Ginger, I like ginger. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to whiskey ginger. My guest today is one of my favorite people in earth. I say that for all my guests, but I mean once again today, it is earthquake. Ladies and gentlemen, the joke telling business, joke telling. That's right. Cheers. We're having ourselves earthquake walked in and said he didn't want to have anything to drink. Then he saw a little old rip van winkle here 10 year and he said, you know, maybe go get me an ice cube or two, and I'll have a little sip. Yeah, I got a little bite to it too. Yeah, it'll kick you. Oh, god damn. Gorm's your soul. Yeah. I feel like a cowboy just ran and you know, came into the saloon. I'll take some sails gorilla. Yeah. Do my fucking corn on the bar, lead the bar, lead the bottle. Oh, this is strong. It's good, right? Yeah, it's a little strong. It's, I think it's a 107 proof. Who? Delicious. Shit. What do you drink when you're drinking? I'm a Calon 18. You're a big Scotch guy. Yeah, I'm a Scotch. I do a T-dose when I want to go white. The world is white. For some of us. For some of us. Celebrate. Y'all in a good taste your season. Wait, but you didn't hear what happened in 2035. Last year, I'm a redhead. We got nominated as Black adjacent. Well, Black community embraced us as Black adjacent. Ain't none wrong with it. Yeah, because we're different. Well, because we're different, right? We're so different that they kind of, they, they grouped us as non-white, but not black. We're kind of in an island on our own. Well, like we were when we first were. How many of that? I mean, what's our count? How many, how many redheads are left? I don't know. How many redheads are on earth right now? Let's take a little gamble. Let's take a guess. I'm thinking on earth out of eight billion people, there's got to be, I would say less than, I would say maybe two or three million redheads. What do you think? Maybe if it's fucking get your five. Okay. I mean, I can't do that. How many? 140 million. 140 million. There's more of us than you think. 140 million redheads. Yeah, 13% of Scotland, 10% of Ireland. You got to remember, most of us are in hiding. Well, I don't need to because I'm, I'm, if you're above a five on the look scale, you're allowed to be out in public as a redhead. But if you're an under five, if you really are a decrepit ginger, they keep us away. You got to hide. You have to go away. Yeah, I need some selfish thing. Because, you know, ugly people come out and all the nominations. They do. Yeah, they do. In your face. But ugly and redhead is really a double man. That's a two for one. That's not a redhead. I mean, in Latino like Mexican redhead means you the chosen one, ain't it? How would they used to say that about Camelo? Camelo. Camelo. Camelo. The redhead. He was the chosen one. Yeah. If I'm in a, if I'm in a, I don't know that's for fact. No, no, it's true. If I'm in a big Mexican neighborhood, people want, I will get a canelo. Yeah. Once they'll go canelo. They canelo. From across the street. Have you ever smashed the redhead? Yeah. I did. Yeah. I did a red on red. Yeah. Actually red. Yeah. Natural. None of the fake shit. Yeah. No fake. Yeah. So is it red down there too? Yeah. Well, it was shaved. But yeah, I imagine before it was shaved. It was redhead. That might look creepy. I'm saying. Yeah. Yeah. I don't see. You got me curious, but I'm married now. Have you ever had, have you ever had a red? Never. Never. But you have you tasted all the continents? No. No. What are you talking only? I'm a segregated only black. I mean, they don't even want to hit on me. I mean, no way. No, I've never, no. White girls never hit on you. Ever. I don't believe that shit at all. No, really. Really? No, I'm never. Why do you don't hit on me period anyway? Not anymore. No, I mean before married before I was married. They did. I don't know. What are we talking? You're telling me about self-confidence. What are you saying? You walked around. You're you're a successful comedian who's been famous for 40 years. For over 35. Okay. So what are you talking? You're saying women never hit on you? I don't say never, but women don't hit on me. Certain things we call it closers. They mean the one they know. I'm not a closer. No. No. You're an opener? Beyond an opener. Yeah. For me to hit on a woman is, she has to be. I like you. My reconnaissance is terrible. And I'm not a hunter because I hate to be rejected. Right. Oh, that one walk when you walked over there to ask that girl to dance. And she said, no. And all your friends, lad, that's how I have asked any of you my fucks for you. You won't get me again. What's it? Do you have a story like that? Oh, bad rejection story when you were young? All it's on. I mean, in the community, you have women dancing in the floor and you come dance with and they go sit down. To my mother's stories. They said, they're good. They dance it. That hurts. And you come on the back and go, oh, damn, they turn around seeing you and stop dancing go sit down. She kind of bullshit. Is that how you get that kind of shit you like now? No, you're good. I'm good, man. I wrote a note to a girl, my freshman year, and I've slitted under her door. And I saw her laughing with other friends about the note I wrote her and that one stayed with me for a long time. It scarves you dead. That hurts. I still remember me walking over there. I was like 11. We at the school dancing. So it's part house party. She standing over there. All her friends are dancing. I come over to ask her that not I want to dance. I had to walk back my friends, lad. Next month, I couldn't have been I couldn't even been a hot minute. My fuck come ask her to dance football, though she got her grinding with a man. Now let me know. You can't trust these. You can't. Oh, no, you could have danced with me. Yeah, she showed up. That's why to be honest with you, people would be saying I dance with everybody when I be at the club. Sometimes my friend like, man, you're dancing with the chicken. I mean, some real non show business type dancers. You know, my friend, like, I said, I know I should feel somebody got a dance with them. You know, somebody's got to. I mean, I mean, they don't cost me nothing to make her day, you know. I've been there before. Yeah. And now you and the day make your business. So I reverse it. Find six has been dancing like, nah, I'm straight. That's your chair. You did you go over there and dance with the chick with with a feet all out. Dressed off it. The coat girl. You know, everyone had the coat girl. She watched the coats way everybody else go dance. She watched the drinks. Yeah, stay back. Yeah, she usually the driver. She just drive them in. I don't know why I ask of the dance. Then the ones I'll be knocking off dance with the coat girl. That's the lesson lesson learned today. She watched the coats in the purse. Why they go dance? I mean, thank you. You stay right here. Don't know why I ask. What is her name usually? Oh, man, you know, she's got a name. Yeah, she got a name, but nobody knows it because nobody never asked. Only person knows my fucking checker for ID. They let anybody else in. They won't see your ID. They looking for a violation. Yeah. It's a student ID. You need a government one. Oh, stop that Todd. Let her in. No. I'm not losing my job over her. She needs some goddamn state ID now to school ID. The feed out. The feed out of the shoes is hilarious. I saw that right away. Falling out of those sandals. Yeah, falling toe over the side is so slide. It's a constant slide when she walked because the shoes are rotating. I want you to have a big cast because it slides on a dance with her. Yeah, your dance with her. No, because I know I know how that feels. It's you've been there. Oh, when you were a kid, when you were you in high school, were you popular in high school? No, my brothers were. And then I hang around my friends that was in. We have go-go bands in DC. And his name was Dave. And he was part of the go-go band. And I hung with him. So I got to see how women treat men that had a little juice with him. Well, you had yeah, you had that great perspective. You got to sit back and watch. You watch the angle. Yeah, yeah, that's great. And they were screwed like that too. Like we in a tiff grade, but they are grown. They they have schedules like grown as a professional musician. I didn't know it at the time because they're on a school day. They would go and play at a arena. The gas theater and we're being at the 4 o'clock in the morning at 14 years old. And they be cranking planning instruments called red essence and we go and we used to get to ask what for being out there that late but it was worth to ask what because when you go back to school everybody was there and you didn't want to be the only nerd that don't want to say hey man what's your name it was cranking and you were what was your head I was at home weren't good fuck out so you it was worth to ask what that being said I learned how women treated because one of my friends like I said David here coming to school and girls be waiting for him in class talking I knew you had to work last night y'all was cranking I was there you can get a chance to do your homework so I know you had a chance because you was working here I did it for you just put your name on the top of the tape and turn it in and I said well I was there too she said she said fattening good education y'all be a shabby yourself I'm here hanging in the air thing up I'm not going to school I ain't doing your shit I say bitch I said it to myself I like yeah all right yeah so I knew nobody wasn't gonna do my homework but they did his homework Dave and yeah his name Dave and little Benny it was too he was light skin so he had all the women little Benny little Benny where's he today you think do you know he's resting piece he's gone yeah he's gone he we all went to high school I'm still no other women been in contact the band is still there but the original players has changed Dave Dave not around either no Dave is he in North Carolina down at my father he got kicked out the group when we was in high school he just couldn't stop you know I never understood how you late for band practice yeah you made up the time yeah it's a band it's a band the fuck is it you know they used to suspend them for shit like that I would lay for band practice think it's a band it's a band man all this discipline in a band you know you're out y'all are musicians yeah sex drug rock around now they they holy I said they want to put you out man they did they kicked his ass so well you didn't play sports at all when you were young no no no no athletic ability to get you know first of all again you just ain't gonna holler at me as a coach yeah once they start hollering and like who you talking to you went into that now you don't talk to me like that football that shit was too painful yeah basketball they hollered you fuck running up football hit me no hitting you back fuck this shit you know so I just sat in the bleachers and Washington talked about them were you talking shit in high school yeah were you kind of started well I never said it too loud because they and I was just back in them days motherfuckers ain't take constructive criticism was included we had abundance yeah my job is to talk shit about you know and my job is to whip your motherfuckin ass you couldn't holler shit to grow big motherfuckers like that yeah you saw my fuck shoot the ball you get your ass well yeah so it was more internal when did the when did comedy really start to get in your blood though like when did you really start to figure out that that's what you wanted to do was it around high school no no this was a pivoting man I never did anything comedic I first of all I didn't even know being a comic was an occupation sure you know so I knew about the rich pride all that but I knew him theatrical the movies yeah my mother and father him watching his hearing his tapes and shit like you heard about it but nigga I ain't doing shit with my mom from trying to get outside I said around listen to no shit with him and plus they're not there to you know to allow us to hear it anyway so I never knew that and what got me into it as you draw was an ambulatory for nine years and I I hated my job I just hated working anyway and I was trying to find anything to get out of not doing my job which was loading nuclear weapons for a living and I just did tops and blues try that shit out and then I knew I was getting out the military out to be in the nine years I said I got to find what I'm gonna do so I started looking at other motherfuckers do different stuff and I took this girl to see this comedy shit she was playing it on her TV and it was a dissing everything and this motherfucker was laughing like shit falling all under the table I ain't gonna say who comedian was and I just said to I said if you want to fuck them just say you want to fuck them but they ain't that funny she's like you just hating on the man I'm like no that's fun but they don't you know I think the funniest shit I ever heard for you to be all under the table just fuck so she was like if you think you could do better than do it I was like I don't know if I can do better than that but they get I ain't the funny shit I ever made me out of here so we want to fuck that dude so so the next time we went to a comedy club and I tried it and it was cool and I don't know what kind and it was just the options of what I'm gonna do I'm gonna try this and that and I just got with coconuts and they put me on with Tom Wilson just put me on a couple of things you were with Tom Wilson yeah doing about like doing co-headlining shows yeah well he was headlight I was open it right yeah and I went to see Steve Harvey and said I want to be a comic page told me what it takes and this and that and I'm gonna say let me try it out I'm gonna say well something else to come along let me just try this shit but it was never an occupation or desire or this I am more surprised that this is my calling than anybody on this world really yes what did you think was gonna be your land what did you think you were gonna land at eventually I don't know what I was gonna do but I knew I was gonna be successful because I'm not a struggling type you know I'm not good at that I'm not good at struggling and you know the mean I have to I have to produce certain amount of income to take care of certain things I ain't like I'm not cleaning up I gotta make enough money to find somebody to clean up for me right you know what I'm saying yes before I can get a woman before I can get this to this these are the certain things in my life that I have to accumulate enough and I knew I was gonna be successful now because my mother told me you don't you're gonna have to hire a lot of people you're gonna be more than ever oh you're gonna need a lot because you said this is shit you say you ain't gonna do right that you ain't gonna do and not to do it you need somebody to do it for you so to ask you a question on it it was just try that one day you know nothing better has came along how old were you when that happened 26 27 okay nine 28 yeah I was in my 20s that's what I'm saying when I hang with Dave and Chris rock and he all the comedies I knew it in high school I knew it that's why I don't do shit for my family my foot was like you knew I had this and ain't nobody tell me shit fuck out of here you know deserve shit live in great right yeah if you've seen all this right you know bring them my attention yeah should have told me yeah I don't like to know thank you yeah just tell them all but nothing better came along is probably one of the funniest things I've ever heard in my life nothing better came along but you hated the military you you hated working so much in the military he was like I got to get the fuck out of well I knew they was getting tired of me well you weren't gonna be a lifer you weren't gonna work you were gonna be I mean if ain't nothing better came along I would have stayed for 20 years you know I'd like to pension and say goodbye my thing is why get out to just do something that you already got so right what made me get out the war broke out so I told them my folks I don't mind practice it for war which I'll fight for real this relationship right yeah you know the main thing is the drill I just don't want to do it yeah man I'm not going over here fight for no only me have a car I've got to sit BP your ex on over that right I don't give a son of a saying take all all in the Middle East fuck you bring it to a nigga in the car for the tongue on his out natural interest you know it is my fucking yours the gas station right they didn't mind I ain't going to shit I could have stayed there only get shot at the fuck I'm going over there for and y'all gotta understand this is the time that they told us he had chemical war for chemical war I mean war agents right that he had weapons of mass destruction man yes weapons of mass destruction by morning the chemical aspect of it that we had to be over there fighting and I got them suits with the air mask on and everything on but we train on that shit I always die with the simulated war they got the first one a month I can die shit went underneath my mask I ain't put on the fuck I'm going over there real with all nigga you killed me every time we act through this exercise you tap me on the shoulder you dead my brother you got your gloves out in the camp the fuck I'm going over there for you died every time every war every simulated war I die - Fuck, I'm gonna go over the reel before. - Fuck that. - Fuck that, that's the thing. You'll be the dumbest month of your world. You died for, I've been in there nine years. Nine straight years I have died in every exercise in a simulated wall. And you want me to be the first, go for the real one. - No. - Somebody trying to kill me, man. - Yeah, you gotta get out. - I gotta get out. - When you left the military, did you go to the West Coast first? - No, I went to Atlanta. - Oh, that's right. I do know that you don't want to. - I went to Atlanta because CNN said that's the blessed place for black men to prosper. - And is it? - That what they said. And I've never been there before I said fuck it. - You why not? - No, because I'm from Washington DC. You've been doing nine years. And the military didn't go back to where he was at. - And that's black? That's asking to be in illegal pharmaceuticals. That's an episode of power, nigga. (laughing) - 50's writing that line. - Yeah, right now, God, the military went shit phone. But I'm gonna say I'm getting 20G, so he copped the key law. - Right. - Saying that's believable. You gotta say that's what I'm gonna say, man, there you go, let this charge money. - Yeah. - Key's gone for 14,000, you just give me 14,000. - Right. - I bring you back 28. - Right. - In here, we pour whistle. - This episode of Whiskey Ginger is brought to you by Squarespace. I've talked about Squarespace so much on this show. You must be nauseated, but I gotta tell you, I built my site with Squarespace. You should build yours with Squarespace. If you don't know what it is, Squarespace is the all-in-one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or scaling your business Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website. Grow your brand and get paid all in one place. What I love the most about Squarespace to be honest with you is the analytics, I do love them so very much. The SEO tools that they have make you get discovered so fast. And I love the analytics 'cause I wanna see where you guys are. I wanna see where my clicks are coming from so I can know where to sell tickets. They also have a video portion, a donations portion, whether you're selling something, if you're running a campaign, you're doing charity work. No matter what it is, whether you're a personal trainer or a comedian that's trying to come see you, I wanna know where you are and that's where Squarespace helps with cutting edge design, amazing email campaigns, and also if you're raising money, they got a donation section there where you can get donations or you can sell content all in one place. Squarespace makes it incredible. You must try it. What you gotta do is go over to squarespace.com/wiskey. Use the offer code Whiskey to save yourself 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. And once again, go try it, play around with it, see how amazing they've put it together to make it seamless for you to show up all the time on the internets at squarespace.com/wiskey. Use the promo code Whiskey. Once again, for 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. - Thank you. I like to enter. What'd you do in Atlanta when you first moved? - How were you making money? - I just know, I was just, first of all, I got my unemployment because I get that and the money that I had for I'm getting released. It's about 20 G's and back and then Atlanta was affordable, man, for the rent was $450. - $400 a month? - $400 and I went with four of my other friends. So all of them got out to the world, broke out. I was telling the same thing. You died in simulated war. You got to take your war, man. Not over, tell them I'm fuckers hollering at us when they get to the United States. - Right. - Call the fuck on that we ain't going over. You ain't no no Kuwaitin. The fuck, you know, it's the foot of the Kuwait. Who is this nigga Kuwait? I think it's the guy here. So we all forgot out and we moved to Atlanta. And that one Atlanta was Atlanta. Atlanta was, you, I mean, we were city boys. We from Washington DC, New York, Cleveland, Denver. And we, we've seen the world. We going to Atlanta. Atlanta was still with the seven part of it. It was so, so ripe. They even allow you to pump the gas and then go pay 'em. - Oh, that's wild. - We all the reason why you have to pay for it, 'cause we ain't pay for shit. We, we, we, we like this motherfucker's own. - Yeah. (laughing) - This one, this pump, we lookin' mad and then nigga look on his car. We all the y'all going to the y'all's house. - Let's go. - No, we, we was shocked. We like, this gotta be a setup. - Right. - So the first time you pay, and you like, and then you talk to the guys, you like, man, my pump was on. You say, yeah, yeah. And they look at us like we're stupid. - Right. - Nah, you pay, when you finish pump, we like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, y'all even won all the time. You like, yeah, fuck on with you, like shit. Pump that gas, lay that motherfucker, hose on the ground, 'cause see, when you put it back in, that allows the, the people going in, let you know the fittings. - Right. - That you finish when you look out and see you, but if you lay that bitch on the ground and the machine, they can steal pumping. You got half way in Marietta. (laughing) Fuck, I didn't look out there. Well, I thought it was on. (laughing) Well, I don't see nobody, 'cause that motherfucker is a trash can. How are you gonna see no fuck about it? We gone, motherfucker. We was robbing them, they was on the news. There's been a rash of gas stillers in our city. We were like, that's us. (laughing) - That's right, what is it, is it Jersey? Where they won't let you pump it on, yeah? - Yeah, you got to pull in Jersey and they come out. - They have to, then that's-- - Them you and you're gonna keep a job. - Oh, yeah. - Yeah. - You can pump your own gas. - Listen, man, we'll sell you gas station, but we pumped the gas. - That's exactly right. - Yeah, you don't pump the fucking gas. - You don't pump the motherfucker. 'Cause we need to know who getting gas in this motherfucker so we get our fish, yeah. - Right, they're counting. So when you're in Atlanta, your friends from the military, and then you started doing stand-up in Atlanta. - Yeah, and then what took you to L.A. Was being on tour with Def Comedy and all that stuff? - No, man, man, we had to fall out with my pockets as our old three comedy clubs. And, you know, Uptown Comedy Calling Quakes, Quakes Comedy Club, and another one in Texas. And I had no ambition or desire to come to Los Angeles. All my friends, when I first started doing this, and it was it, like I told you it was no, it just was a blessing that it happened, but I didn't have the desire to be in L.A. - Right. I was telling you, I'm a military and I'm getting a lot of money for standing on stage, for just being me. And, you know, Chris Tucker was like, "Come on, let's go to Hollywood." I was like, "Go on out." I just got down to this sweet motherfucker. You been living your whole life. I ain't going nowhere, and all my friends was telling me, "Come on, you need to go to L.A." I'm like, "No, man, I'm just sweet down here." 'Cause I'm on Comedy Club. I'm still in my investments, and anytime somebody wanted to see me, they had to give me out Atlanta, you had to pay a retail on the show. Me and my partner had filled out the stories, ain't worth discussing, and to keep from doing anything ignorant about it on the other way of the betrayal of it. I just went on the left of Atlanta, and came straight out to L.A. And me and Billy Gardel was-- - Love him. - Yes, that's my friend. Me and him had the same manager, Christopher Petta, and Billy was coming out here, so we both came up at the same time. - He's the best. - We lived across the street from each other. And me and Billy used to hang every month on the day, and just sitting there, like he had his son, when I had my son, he got married, when I got married from my first marriage. And he moved out to neighborhood, and I was so fucking happy that he got his show, and he was on, and it was it. And I was just out here, like, do I really want to do TV? Because I was still making a lot of money on the road. It's a different location for flying from L.A. to Atlanta. But yeah, that was the whole fucking story. That's one of the reason I came out to L.A. And now that I got out here, you wake up on morning, you're like, damn, you been paying this bitch for 15 years. Because it's perfection of it. Since no season, so you, you know, when you live our east, that bad winner of 94, and, you know, it gives you a bitch. This motherfucker's the same every day. - Every day. - You know what I mean? So you have no season changing of the girl. You lose the time that you have been here, because the seasons don't change. - Oh, big time. I've been here 20 years, if you haven't. - Yeah, you just feel like you just got to this moment. You came in 2000, I'm like, goddamn, that's right. I'm going to 26 fucking years. I've been out here longer than I've been anywhere in my life. - And let's tell you, that's a weird thought, 'cause then now your California's home, home, home. - It's home. - It's weird. - Definitely now. I mean, I've been out here so long, I guess money. (laughing) - I gotta get this. - No, you're doing good. No, you're doing great. You got a new special on Netflix, and please. - Yes. - Please go watch that. The Joe Tellin' Business is out on Netflix. We have two specials on Netflix, but this one's out now. - Yes. - Yeah, you got a new one out now. - Yes. - Would you film this? - I think it was May, I've filmed it in Atlanta. - Oh, in Atlanta, yes. - Yes, I did legendary at home, 'cause I'm from DC. And then I had to do the second one in Atlanta, because that's where I was born and raised in comedy. They made Earthquake, you know what I mean? So I will always be indebted to Atlanta. What theater was it at? - Bucket theater. - Oh, I love Bucket. - Yeah, Bucket theater. You know, it's my most proudest special because man, I call it the Michael Jordan flu game. This is your flu game special? Yeah, it was my flu game special and I had bad sinuses and then my fucks pop up any fucking time and it popped up dead. You know, you can't go to Netflix and say, I don't feel good today, let's shut all this production down and we're going to come back a month from Thursday, all the days should pay. I can do that. He can do that. He can tell him what. He can do that. Me, me, me, me. Not as the me ain't feeling in the back. He's the man. Yeah. But for us, I mean for me anyway, you got to play that game or assume the risk. That's the responsibility financially of what it calls. I don't want to do that. You don't want to do that. No, I don't want to do that. I don't want to pay for everybody. No, thank you. I'm good. We'll shoot. Yeah. We'll shoot. The camera's off. You don't want to pay for twice. No, no, fuck that. You paid them for the night and then they got to come back and shoot the one that you feel better. Uh-huh. Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. Good. And what people don't understand that's about comedians is this ain't nothing different than any other time that occupational hazard that we deal with every year. Right. No time to just like a football player, athlete, no comedian gets on that stage 100 percent healthy. No. No, you're going through something. They go through something. Something is up and down. Something is up and down right there and we have to play anyway. The true professional ones. Yeah. You got to me. Yeah. Some I'm leaning on, like for me, for my special, I just leaned on the material. Yeah. You understand? It tickles like the material you get that is and it is big for itself. Well, you did it enough. You've done it enough. Like you know, like you're professional enough that you just know what to do, but to be sick during a filming is crazy hard. It's not hard, it's man. Everybody come in with their home remedies and shit. Take this goose and soak it in the juice and then it'll clear your throat out. Because they want to see you heal because they see it in its love, but you'll be amazing on the home remedies that you get from the crew, the staff at the theatre, your own people. And I say, "If I take all this shit, I'm a die." Is that what you really want? That would you guys really fucking want. If I take all your motherfuckers remedy, I die. What do you think now that this is out? Are you touring a new hour after this? Oh, yeah. Wow. Yeah. See, I don't tell jokes. I don't write. I'm mentally right. Right. So I don't physically write. So once the subject matter that I was talking about, that I made funny is over, there's no recording of it mentally in it because it's gone. That situation is gone. What had me mentally thinking about it is gone. Now, what I'm seeing now that I can make funny of. So when people come to you sometimes say, "Dude, this is joking," you're like, "You'll remember it, but it'll sound fucked up." It's not the same for me. Because you're not there no more. Right. See, I write, like, it's the truth. It's a subject that's the truth and then I'll elaborate on it. Sure. If a problem got shot, boom, then by the time I finished, he got shot, 11 times, fell under the tree. He ran up the street, he had to get shot, 11 times, I'm going, "Where's my pistol?" He said, "Shouldn't say we're the hospital app." But he didn't say that. He kept running. Right. And this goes all the way. Expand, expanded. Expand, expanded. And you flip it and then flip it and then when you get it to the point where, like Steve obviously, a number one, and a number one is a joke that'll work anywhere and to make a month for a life at a funeral. Every way you said it, nowhere where you put it, how you did it, it always worked. That's a number one and when you're ready to do special, you learn all your number ones and then tape it. That's how you've always done it. That's how I always done it. Right. And then now, we'll see. Now, there's a thing going on with the internet, with specials, there's a million of them out there, like a lot of people are doing them. Do you think you're going to continue to keep putting out specials, or is it now slowing down? You just want to tour and do live for a long time. So right now, me and Bill Burr is doing a TV show for Fox this season. That's great. Yes. He's the production company and I want to show my version of funding in a sitcom form. Good. And. Did you write it? Yes. Oh, great. I've slated for this season and I want to do that and then I'm going to, after I do that, I'm going to drop another special, like God be my witness, be healthy on that day and anything above it. He will. And put it together and I'm going to shoot that one probably this time next year. Wow. That's good. I mean, you already got to plan down. You're about to show going hiatus for the first season. I'm going to shoot a special right after because I got like 30, 30 minutes of it what one's right now. And by the time the end of this year, it'll be all together what I want to do. And certainly put another 30 and sell it. Good. That's great. What's the name of the show with Bill? Steel Quake. Steel Quake. Steel Quake. Didn't go away. No, yeah. Steel Quake. Steel Quake. Steel Quake. Bill Burr is a great guy man and it's a pleasure and honor and a God bless of we sitting there of having him be the executive producer on my show. Give a note. Thank you. Yeah. So, Bill, when I submitted my treatment for my show and he said, I get it all the time. Nobody has came with complete understanding and thoroughness of this fucking show you got. And I'm saying, this is the shot we, I know I will never get another opportunity like I'm having right now with Fox and get this opportunity because they have mandated. They want an earthquake show, not a water now show, they don't care what I put fetishes as my occupation long as it captured my own voice. And I'm going to surround myself with a people that understands that and we're going to take advantage of this opportunity and put my version of funny out here and see how it does. Thank you, Fox. Oh, thank you. Where it's can never ever express. Thank you, Fox. So, thank you, thank you is below, it's so weak of a, where I can't even found it, yeah. I mean, it's just, sometimes I, I, I really, I said back in, because I didn't have 18, 20, I didn't have every deal that is in my 30 years. But the deal with the, with the opportunity and a person that wants you to be you and that's what they're buying and they express to see Fox is going back to their, their origin when they first got married with children, yeah, yeah, and living color, you know what I mean, all of that original shows, original, Martin love where about to be the flagship or bringing that multi camera back to Fox with the age, we're not CBS with your grandmother, we're not NBC trying to be the happy with Fox, we understand, I'm saying with a sense, right, we, we, we there, you know, we, we, we, you know, comedy, sexual, y'all, we're Fox when they come to broadcast, this is where it is. And I was told that and, um, um, Michael was told, Bill, Bill Purve was told that and we came together and said we don't give it to him. That's great. And we don't give it to him. And I'm in to give that opportunity, you know, that's an opportunity and that's the network president that said that to us. That's a big deal. I'm saying, I ain't no higher than a shareholder that's saying, this is what we want all from it. And it's just an, and I plan on to ask your question to Orrin and I know this dedicate, um, his next this year to my, um, to my TV show, to the show, to the show. Wow. Are you, how much of your real life is in the show? Is it like taking from what's going on in your life right now? Yeah. I mean, but on a comedic area, I mean, certain things have base that we have similarities. But like I said, pre was, take that and then run away, run with it and make it as scrappy as possible. It's big. The character. Yeah. The characters that's in really my life that I just expand on, on a worse day. Right. It made him day. On a worse day. On a worse day. It made it day every day. Right. Yes, that's perfect. You get what I'm saying. He's a real, on a worse day, made it day every day and done and take it that way. That's what I'm saying. I'm still, that's why it's called steel quick. And all this has happened, but I'm still quick at the end of it all at the end it is all I'm still quick When you go when you do like bounce back after doing like a show or a movie or something like that when you go back on on the road Does it take you a long time to readjust or you one of these guys? It's it doesn't even skip a beat for you. It doesn't because it's stand-up is my sanctuary And now it's even going to be better for me because it's no longer my Only source of income Right, there is there is ancillary now. Yeah, yeah When stand-up is your only source here come you can't fuck around get boo fuck with your tic-sales No, you need it. Yeah, you need to work You Give a bad show Friday my fuck is one show. I'm sorry then Sunday. Yeah, and get all that's why your first shows on Friday It's important because people call like what you do like I want to go see your crew man It's funny. Let me see get I get some tickets. So it says so you understand that. Yeah, but if you got a TV show You coming at my man. That's the man. I really don't want to be in this I want to tell you you I want to throw back you you one of the nicest things that ever happened to me Was your buddy Billy Gardell who I love I was I got asked to go down to I Think it was Irvine Irvine Improv to do hope to host when I first you know was hosting out and They said oh, it's gonna be a Billy. So okay, and so I showed up real early I was there a couple hours early and I was in the green room and Billy walked in with a couple of guys that he was with And I'm not gonna say any names, but so he walked in and I got up immediately and I got out of the green room And he's like where are you going? I said well the headliner's green room I was just waiting for you guys to arrive, you know, just to say hi and introduce myself. He said sit down I said no, no, I'm okay And one of the men that was with him sat in the seat that I was in and I said no I'll just go out to the bar. This is the headliner green room. He said no your comedians sit down And I said and I said no, no, no, it's it's okay And then he said to his buddy who was sitting in the seat he goes get up Give him back his seat and his buddy was like what? He goes get the fuck up. Give him back his seat And so I reluctantly sat down, but I was also like now this guy's gonna fucking hate my guts, but Billy was you know Billy was being very hospitable and he was such a nice guy of the whole time Because I was so young and nervous as shit, you know You're hosting these shows for these guys and I was you know, they don't know me And so you just want to do good and shut the fuck up and get out of the way But Billy was such a great dude, but I forever remembered that as like one of the One of the greatest moments as a young comic when somebody does that to you Yeah, that happened to Billy before and Billy know how that feels. Yeah No matter where you start among you should have some Just some sense of Just love for your federal comedian because you once was an opening You know how it is to be in there. You know how it is to be shitting on by this Eric and fuck who happened to start Before you did right only different for me you you started first, right? That's it, right? You've been in here for 30 years. You old man You telling the rules. They didn't work for you, right? Maybe you are the most disciplined comment, but it ain't helping with your progression and your fucking job Oh your career. Well and Billy knows that yeah, that's why I mean him is so friends the humility of him And why he told him to get out the seat is because that show seat because he was already sitting there as a comic Yeah, yeah, it was a big it was a big moment It was always he was already as a comic and even if this dude is a comic He should know that and if you ain't a comic, you need to get your motherfucking ass up anyway You ain't a comic. I'm gonna fuck you started today You ain't never start shut the fuck up. Get up. Yeah, that's the mentality of Charlie. Yeah, it's evil Or so even way if the person who was sitting there was a comic you should have had some empathy Understanding that that's this fucking seat federal comment. And if you ain't don't probably sit down anymore You ain't no goddamn comic. This is a green room Yeah, you say no sitting area. Well, see we all expect like do you have one that sticks out in your mouth trying to start some shit But do you remember something that happened to you when you were a young comic that's kind of fuck you up stayed with you It's hard. I know. I don't want you to have to throw anybody but I mean But sometimes people do that to us. I mean, I mean I have some of my best friends fuck me up I mean with the star shit. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, when they get famous and they get famous they get the star shit. Yeah, the attitude changes. Yeah, I mean They flex You know what I mean? Yeah, I do. I never take the shit personal cuz me anyway, I make even one's decision I'd I give you a pass and give you grace on that well, I never come see your ass again Those are two more fucks choice Yeah, the bad day, right? I'd be your hucker bird, right? It's your friend. I'm your hucker bird. I ain't gonna be your hucker birdies. You're right. Yeah, I'll be right. I'll give you thank you Cuz I had one of my friends friends still with my friend. I can't see this motherfucker had me waiting for him for 45 minutes Like I was one of his bitches Ain't no one saying maybe a minute doing it. Just waiting My respectful I didn't leave Yeah, that's huge cuz I had already told them I'm here. He said give me a minute Okay, you understand. Yeah, so that so I'm waiting And you just five minutes. All right. I'm gonna get this motherfucker 10 more minutes 10 15 minutes. Yeah, then you are ranked I can't believe this in there. Then I'm gonna fuck calm We sit there like all right. You just mark it You yeah, you yeah, it logs in it logs in you like that. I see that shit Don't come over with that bush. You don't know my fuck. You gotta get your dick wet on somebody else Ain't your whole now. Yeah, you know, it's you know, it stays with you And it's but I I do get mad at other comedies that snap off that and curry that shit like it, so Vandetta. Yeah, yeah, like you were scarred Yeah, you know the music about a joke 30 years ago He snugged me with it isn't I for autograph for right the fuck and This is me maybe they shouldn't Let's say for instance that is what happened it is You are blessed motherfucker. Yeah, that little incident scarred you that bang shit. I was happy Yeah in this world and then what that's carried you with fuel and venom and Revisions, I mean you got to get this motherfucker It's because the nigga did not and I mean this Signing autograph for you Yeah, you gotta let it go Signing autograph for you Or set a joke that was yours. Right. I got friends that took bar jokes Really yeah Was that like you we all know that's like the ultimate in comedy that's like the one the one thing You still talk to people that took shit from you. Yeah, why just a joke. Yeah, it doesn't matter I guess I mean I'm in the joke telling business. Yes, you are I make these yeah, there's no joke you could take That could fuck with me because it's me you could ever know Because yeah, I know where I got mine from I got you now right cuz you running out right over here If you had enough, you would be over here, right. I got you right. I ain't running out right I'm gonna joke telling business. I make these. This is what I do. This is what's in on and on me on it Now I'm not gonna let you take it off of it. We're going knowledge. Just point on it. Yeah, and we they know I have said I don't hey man. I'm on the show. Can you not use my this this this today? I would like to use it Since I wrote it. I'd like to use it. I would like to use this one today Yeah, see that's how you don't be non-confrontation. Yeah, you don't need it. Yeah, I don't for what yeah, it's fine. It's a joke. Yeah It ain't my man who it ain't in my tag. It ain't my kids, right? They ain't none of this a joke So you you don't want put so much on the fucking emphasis on Of it is if you in the you think McDonald's get mad at the hamburger mad if you lose one hamburger He and hamburgers make a business. He ain't about hating the motherfuckers stole the hamburger. If you in the hamburger now We only got four hamburgers. Yeah, that's just imagine the motherfuckers 20 years, but if he producing the motherfuckers out that bitch One hamburger. You're good. Yeah, you know, the hamburger ain't rallying my people. He didn't stole this hamburger 19.02 Yeah, he don't care because he in the hamburger making business and I'm in the joke telling business. Yeah, you are in the joke telling business That's why I named it Joe. - It's a good name for a special, too. I'm joke telling business, that's all I am. I'm not your pastor. I'm not none of this shit. None of it. - Yeah, you've never done this high horse thing that a lot of people do. It happens in comedy, right? Well, people in comedy kind of feel like their voice or opinion or thoughts on something matters more than anybody else's. But I don't think you've ever talked to people like that in your whole career. - No, because. - It's not your style at all. - Nothing will, it's my opinion. It's just an opinion. - Yeah. - So, I'm not going to tell you what my opinion is, just swaying yours, 'cause you're still entitled yours. I'll ever tell you the hypocrisy that goes along with it. And this how I came to my opinion on it. - Right. - You understand? - Yeah. - You do what the fuck you want. - Right, you give it to me. - I get it to you. - Right. - I hear you go. - Right. - It ain't even what you see it is. It's the hypocrisy. And this how I'm hanging. - That's how I'm doing it. - Good luck to everybody else. - Yeah. - I ain't tell you what you supposed to. - I'm not put on no man. It's put on this earth to tell another man how his destiny's supposed to be. And no man should tell another man what he ain't. Who are you to tell this man what he's not? - Right. - God, who, who ain't known it you? - Yeah. - He ain't over here to tell this man his shortcoming. What he is not. What he should be doing. And why I'm the fuck you all here worrying about what I'm not doing? Why you worrying about what I'm doing? Who's fucking working on you? Oh, my fault. You got your shit all together. You have made more fuckers. You got time to evaluate anybody else's life. That's why I tell him over. I have no time to tell you what you should be doing. 'Cause I'm still working on me. I'm fucking me. I am behind. (laughing) There's a lot of shit. I am a man that's a lot of shit that I need to learn and sit there and understand. But I also have the empathy to understand. And more than that, to simply understand, people go through shit and they take them longer to get to that destination and who am I to tell them they should be there now? - Right. - That's what I'm saying. - 'Cause who knows what people are going through? - You don't know what they're going through and it's God, it's their growth. That's their journey. That's their testimony. They're not there yet. Just 'cause your fast ass made it. (laughing) You can pop them off. (laughing) I'm hit to hear. Come on, fat bastard. (laughing) Come on, you fat, you know. You don't pop the tape. Come on, you fat motherfucker. (laughing) What you sitting down for? You can't get hit, you sit down. (laughing) 'Cause you quick. - Yeah. - You know what I'm saying? You still got to shit the run. You just stop right here to look back. - Right. - Unless you say that's the end of your race, but I want to go probably than that now. I'm just saying God there before you did. So stop calling me, but when I get up here, I'm gonna fuck you up. (laughing) For hollering this shit out. - Yeah. - Fuck you. - Fuck you. - When I get there, I'm gonna fuck you up. - Fantastic approach. I mean, that's what it, also because look, you've been through the game so long, you've seen it change so much, right? Your perspective is so much more solid. I think that's the one thing is, I'm 42. As I've now got into my, into my 40s in this part of my career, I've started to change what I care about more, right? Like you're a father, you marry, there's certain things that just shift the way you give a shit about the business and your life and your career. I think as when we're young, you're so hungry that you only care about the machine a little bit, it kind of dilutes you sometimes. Then you get older and then you start to feel what really is important to you, you know? - Yeah, 'cause more responsibilities come. - Yeah, well life happens. - Yeah, I tell my wife all the time, I make enough money for me. Yo ass, I can't afford it. - Yes, man, I'm all you work off for you. - Right, if you make enough money, it was just me, it was fine. - Shit, one show a month. - We're good. We're good. - One show a number is good for me. I ain't let this shit, I don't live out my price range. No, no, it's you, my fuck, that broke the bank. Not that you ask, well shit, I want you to have. - Yeah. - You understand? So no, I make enough for me. I was a no good motherfucker, I cut air by off, I'd be nice. (laughing) If I said fuck everybody, I'd be nice. - But that's not who you are. - It's not who I am. - Never be who you are, never who I am. - Also that mountain is lonely when you're at the top over there, we know people, you know people that have all of it by themselves. - Well let me try, 'cause this group love is fucking lonely too. - Yeah, it is. - 'Cause yeah, 'cause you know you have no safety net, you are the provider. - Right. - You have no one to turn to but God. That's what I tell my people. For come and ask me for something, try God. - Try God. - See what he says. - Give, let, give Jesus this time to work it. (laughing) You are, you are impatient to believe him. (laughing) He's only been four days and you're over here. - Yeah, relax. - He just asked him, sent me two hours ago. - Get in line. - Wait, it's in his time. (laughing) - You're questioning him, you have no faith. I believe in God, he's gonna work it out for you. - You said you never live beyond your means. You always have been, you always have been pretty careful with your money. - I try. - You've never lived, like you know, you hear some guys that live kind of crazy and irresponsible. You, that's not who you are ever. Have you, you never were foolish? - No, my money always was spent on other things. - Right. - My biggest expense is always be the woman in my life. - People. - Yeah, but a woman in my life, my people are, they can give up, but my baby. (laughing) - No, that's the only thing you know. - The woman first, all everything. - Yeah. - I just, I pride myself on making sure that the woman in my life lives, standing and living that, maybe she might even know one for herself. It's no better status factor than that. - You want it more than she does. You think sometimes you'll, you want this lifestyle more than she wants it? - No, I just want the life, I want, it's not the lifestyle I want. I want the income that allows me to provide the things that I want her to have and the only way I can get it is to have this lifestyle. (laughing) - I opened up the one ass and they nobody paying me, this kind of money. (laughing) I ain't qualified for sitting there. I told my wife the other day, I said for her, I ain't come right now. If I wanted to have a leg, I would at least have to be the head coach. - I would have to, you know what I mean? The income that comes along with those things. I couldn't be in sports as a scout. We're a staff. We're a staff around this motherfucker. I'm a scout. I assist into the assistant, star. (laughing) You'll leave me. - Yeah. - You got to be the head coach. - Oh man, so I got to run with these jokes. So, but there's no enjoyment. Back to, it's no better satisfaction than enjoying them, than making the woman in my life, which happened to be right now for ever. It's my wife happy. And the things that comes along with telling these jokes and being at this point allows me to do that. So, that's what my money goes. - Well, thankfully for the joke telling business, it's going good. - Oh, it's good. - And you better go watch that right now. We should tell the people at home. - Please. - Before we sign off, to please go watch the joke telling business right now on Netflix. You can also watch Legendary, which is also on Netflix. - Yes, but then it's about a great day, you should pay off. - One of the greatest dudes alive. - Oh man, he's a great dude. Thank you. - He's the man. - He is the man. - Either one broke me to Netflix. I am only there because of Dave. - Did you have, you've gone out to Yellow Springs and done that whole thing? - Yes. - Yeah. Did you do the outdoor at the firehouse? - Both. - Both, yeah, we did both. I mean, he let us come do the firehouse first. And that was incredible. And then when I did, we did the summer series this last year. That was one of the most fun times I've ever had in my life. I mean, like, he created a world that I've never seen before. I mean, it's just, nothing, nothing like that thing. - He wrong, 'cause he fuck with me like me. I'm doing this all wrong. - Yeah, yeah, what am I doing? How did he create this shit? - The freedom, the artistic freedom of it. And it's just, it's to me. I like, this is what I want. The freedom of it, the freedom. He's in that town and he's able to bring people such as us and there, break Hollywood to him. - Yeah. You come to me. - You come to day, outside in the summertime in the corn field, inside in the firehouse and there, different on and in this. - It's brilliant. - It's only one hotel in the whole city. - You got to stay in that hotel. - There's nowhere else to go. Everybody know you and it's just, it's beautiful. And then he goes out and do the rest of it. It's a beautiful thing. And I was on the show that is unstoppable when he did it in DC and he called me and said he wanted me to be on the show. And I didn't know he was filming. And I walked in there and just looked around and I was like, this is it. This is the sweetness of the sweetness of our profession. It's like the Hall of Fame. I see what football players feel when they get that gold jacket. - Yeah, he has just that. - Controlling your own destiny, your own how you want to do it. When you want to do it, it's seductive to me to be honest. - Well, you're doing it too. - No, you're doing it too. - You're doing it, you're doing it. (laughing) - No, I'm just doing this. I'm good shit, right? - Fantastic. - You got me drunk in a moment. - I told you. - Mama, I love you. (laughing) - Go see Quake on tour. And watch the special right now on Netflix please. Means the world to us that you came by, support the show, we support you. We end the show the same way. You look into that camera and you say one word or one phrase to end the episode. Some people impart a word of wisdom, some people have a phrase they wanna pass on, but in that camera, one word or one phrase whenever you're ready. - Ooh. - And you could take your time. - One word or one phrase. - So sometimes people, it used to be a word years ago and then I said, well, if you got a phrase, like a coin that you like to leave people of like, you know what I think about before I go to bed or something that wakes you up or something powerful that someone told you, leave it with us. - Oh, that's beautiful, persistence and persistence can't do nothing but bring you the results you want in need. - In here, we pour whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk. - Ooh, that creature in the ginger beard. - Sturdy, ginger. - Like badass, the ginger gene is good. - Ginger's a fugitive. - You only five dollars for the whiskey. - 75 dollars for the horse. - Ginger's our hell now. - This whiskey gives excellent. - Ginger, I like ginger. - Imagine setting your makeup, then forgetting, it's even theirs. 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