E354: What No One Is Saying About the Lindsay Clancy Trial | Lila Rose Show

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I would argue what's going on here is he has told himself she wanted to get 100% on the score, she wanted everything to be perfect, she wanted the NAP schedule to be perfect, she wanted the nutrition to be perfect, and the reality is that's not how it is, and that reality was really hard for her to take. And I want to unpack why that is and why this is a warning sign if we don't wake up and realize the truth about motherhood and children. I've been following the Lindsay Clancy case since I first learned about the horrific deaths of these three children about the hands of their mother and Duxbury Massachusetts back in January 2023. I saw the news reports my heart sunk, and since then I follow the case. Now on this show we've had Dr. Joseph Whit during a psychiatrist who specializes in tapering patients off psychiatric meds, and we had some discussion of this case on this show. But I have yet to give my full opinion, and I have developed this now in the last few years, but especially in the last few weeks after seeing the end of the Clancy trial. Now, as many of you know, the trial was ultimately declared a mistrial, and it will likely be reprosecuted in coming months. But for now, Lindsay continues in a psychiatric hold, and she's ultimately waiting to hear what her fate will be. Now, there has been wall to wall coverage of this case. There have been opinions from across the sides of the political and cultural aisles, everybody's weighing in, everybody has an opinion. But there's one that I think I've often seen missing, which is for those that think that Lindsay is guilty should be locked up for life. What was her motive? How could she have done this? And I want to unpack this case today and share a position that I don't think I've seen out there about why I think this happened. And the reason I think this is so important and the reason that it's captivated me is because I think that in many ways, pregnancy, motherhood, the whole project of bringing new life into this world has been pathologized, has been medicalized. In other words, motherhood today is seen increasingly as a burden, as something that takes away from your autonomy, your empowerment, and your freedom. This is, of course, I believe why we have one million abortions, elective abortions, one million unborn children taken by abortion in this country every year, because children are seen often as the enemy. Now in the Lindsay Clancy case, whether it was postpartum psychosis, and she was completely out of control, or whether she chose to do it, her children ultimately were treated like the ultimate enemy. And these little children, Chora, Dawson, and Callan, five, three, and just a few months old were strangled to death. So I want to first start with the Patrick Clancy 60 minutes interview that just came out a few days ago, which was a bit of a bombshell. Ross do thought was the interviewer. He's actually someone I have great respect for. I just didn't interview with him a few months back. He was a columnist at the New York Times. Now he's working with 60 minutes. But he sat down with Patrick Clancy, and there were some things that I found really interesting that came to light in that conversation. So we're going to take a listen to what Patrick Clancy said in that interview. I'm going to point out some things that I think are very disturbing about the case that I don't see many people talking about, and then I'm going to give you my perspective on the why behind this case, why this happened. So let's unpack it starting with Patrick Clancy, who is the husband of Lindsay Clancy. Callins Heart kept beating for four days. I'm so grateful for those four days that I had with him, and I'm so grateful he hung on. Did you talk to him in those four days? Yeah. Can you tell me anything you said? I said I'm so sorry. So there's Patrick Clancy, who people really criticized him heavily for not showing emotion during the trial, except of course there was a 9-1-1 call played of Patrick discovering the bodies of his children in the basement when he got home after he'd seen his wife on the ground having jumped out of the window or fall out of the window. And people were criticizing him for the lack of emotion on the 9-1-1 call, which was not released to the public, but all the media groups in the room stated that it was some of the most horrific and painful audio that they ever heard in their life because you hear the gutter rule primal screams of a man who's discovering his entire family has been eliminated and that it was his own wife that apparently did it. So here he's tearing up talking about his son, Callan, and he was holding Callan's hand in the hospital while he was using his other hand to type the obituaries of his three children because he said he was afraid that no one would remember them. Because they're just little ones saved their whole life in front of them. There's a very interesting part of this interview where it talks about forgiveness. Now Patrick Clancy, and I remember reading this in the weeks after the terrific incident in January 2023. There was a go fund me set up and Patrick actually wrote a long thing about in memory of his kids, and this is what he was typing when he was holding Callan's hand in the hospital while Callan was dying the baby, the baby would end up dying a few days later. But he wrote this long beautiful, really recollection of their life, how their life mattered, and then he's talked about how he forgave Lindsey, which I remember reading that and thinking, wow, that's some sort of crazy divine grace or it's some sort of denial that he hasn't fully acknowledged what she did and he wants to pretend like it couldn't have happened or that it did happen that it wasn't her fault at all. Because to think that it could have been her fault would have required a deeper forgiveness. So I was actually thinking back then when I read it that he was thinking, oh, it's not her fault. It can't possibly be her fault because if it had been even a little bit her fault. Then forgiving her would have been a task that's only possible through the grace I believe of Jesus Christ God himself. Because to forgive someone you trusted your body heart and soul to your own children to you had children with you had made a raise the life with and they betrayed you in the worst possible way humanly imaginable cheating is no big deal compared to something like this. Like to to betray your spouse in a way where you violently painfully slowly murder one at a time your helpless innocent beautiful little children there's no betrayal I can even fathom that's greater. And so I remember thinking when I read that go fund me three years ago now over three years ago that Patrick had where he was talking about forgiving his wife. And he was like it wasn't Lindsay she was so loving it wasn't Lindsay and I I forgive her and I want you guys to forgive her too because it wasn't Lindsay I remember thinking that he had to think that psychologically that it wasn't Lindsay. That it was somehow like a robot or a devil or demon that took over her body that it couldn't possibly have been her because if it had been her even a little bit. Forgiving her would have been so much harder than spitting that out within weeks days after the death the brutal slangs of those kids. So in a way for his own peace of mind and mental sanity he had to believe that it was completely not her fault that she was completely a victim of her circumstances for him to be able to yes forgive her and yes to even have any sort of semblance of reality. Because an act like that is so earth shattering and life breaking and for it to be done by the person you trusted the most I don't know how someone could even live after that. You would be in the I mean but for the grace of Jesus Christ and my understanding is you know I don't know I can't judge Patrick Lensy's faith but he hasn't talked very much publicly about his faith. So my guess is that you know maybe that's not a big part of his life I don't know but it certainly wasn't something that he talked about or shared in the go fund me. All right let's listen to this next clip I think when it comes to forgiveness I also felt that if I didn't get there I would be eaten up inside forever. So the stories where we tell ourselves are really powerful we tell ourselves stories every single day throughout the day all day about our lives this is the kind of thought train in the back of our minds about interpreting our existence interpreting our reality. And you know for me as a Christian life is all about God and love and so that gives me hope throughout the day through challenges it kind of helps me interpret circumstances know how to show up again I do that imperfectly but that's kind of the background narrative but anybody has a narrative about like people in their life their husbands their wives their employers their employees you know their friends whatever their kids they're very powerful the stories that we tell ourselves about other people about ourselves are incredibly powerful. and my theory. here is that Patrick Clancy had to have a story that his wife was good. Because that's what he experienced with her. I think he was actually a very naive man. This is my opinion. I think that even him falling in love with another woman within a year or two after the horrific death of his children was because he kind of needs women to be good. He needs to be in love. He needs to be in a relationship. He just needs that for his own kind of psychological welfare. So he kind of moved on quickly because he just couldn't survive on his own. But I think he needed Lindsay to be good. Because his experience of Lindsay, even with her being cold or distant or her being mentally ill and all of her challenges, the experience of Lindsay was still he loved her. She loved him and he needed that to be real. And so when the ultimate betrayal took place of her taking the lives of his children, the story he had to tell himself for that other part of his life to be real. And that story to be true, that Lindsay really loved him, that she really loved his kids, that they really had a real marriage, that she was really a good person and not a sociopath. By the way, she was googling am I a sociopath days and weeks before the murders. But the story had to tell himself was that again, it was completely not her fault. And it was completely something outside of her control because any other story about her actions that she even had a little bit of willingness to do that would have basically destroyed his former narrative about his life. And he needed that to remain intact for psychological well being. This is a theory that I have. Let's finish listening to this, this exchange. Did you ask Lindsay why she did it? I asked her if she remembered it. And what did she say? So Ross do that asks him, did you ask her ever why she did it? And he says no. And I thought this was extremely telling. He had, he'd never asked her. So he's never confronted her. This is what this tells me when they went to the hospital, she called him after she was in the hospital. And she's like, basically, do you love me? Like she basically indicated that like the according to the trial and documents that came out, she kind of wanted to him to come back to her. She expected him. She expect Lindsay Clancy expected Patrick Clancy to stay by her side, which by the way, if she truly killed those children, I'm already giving you part of my theory here. If she truly killed those children completely out of my out of body, like completely not willing to do it, completely know free will of her own. The fact that she wouldn't be on her knees begging forgiveness of the world around her of her dead children of her husband is unfathomable to me. Because if I was like, you know, an alien took over my body and I was like driving through the streets and I ran over a, you know, a whole flock of children, right? And I woke up and I didn't know what exactly had happened. I said, and I knew, but I knew that I had done it because I had it in a dream. I remembered it in a dream. Like Lindsay's going to say she told Patrick is going to say Lindsay told her, I would still say, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. I can't believe that I did that. I didn't mean to do that. I'm so, so sorry. I would be like bawling my eyes out and like completely shattered inside that my body, even if I didn't have full control, helped this to happen. This unthinkable act. But there was none of that from Lindsay. None of that during the trial, none of that in any public statements, none of that from her lawyer, none of that to her husband Patrick. And I believe this is why one of the many reasons why he could not continue being in any kind of relationship with her. But even if she had said, I'm so, so sorry, I don't know that he would have stayed, but the point is she showed no remorse. And she completely blamed the psych meds and her medical care. So the reason I think that Patrick didn't ask her, why did you do it? Because for him to ask that would have had to give a little bit of an inch to the idea that maybe she had the power to not do it. And maybe there was some free will there. So I think Patrick couldn't even go there because it would have been too painful. And then there would have been, I can't forgive you, how can I ever forgive you? And he would have been eaten up inside. He had to believe and behave towards her that she was a super sick, broken woman that was completely out of control and had zero control of her actions. Let's finish listening to what he says. She said it was like a dream. And she remembered it much in the way you would remember a dream after waking up. Do you feel like you failed in some way in this period or do you feel like you did the best you could? I think I did the best I could with what I had at the time. And I live with the outcome. I live with it every day. I will say one more thing here. This is where people say he doesn't look sincere. I've heard a lot of people criticize Patrick Clancy at certain points for not looking sincere, acting sincere. And I would argue what's going on here is he has told himself a fiction that she is completely not responsible or accountable that she was this perfect doting mother before their marriage was great. Everything was fine. And she snapped because of psych meds. And then everything went downhill. And now he's trying to rebuild his wife with a new woman and like make his way in the world because he just can't bear to be alone. And he's so broken inside, but that theory that he's telling himself that story doesn't really make sense. And people intuitively know that like on the internet, like people watching the case, because they think, okay, if she was really that broken and out of control, why didn't their why wasn't there more awareness in the relationship? And why does Patrick seem so I guess surprised, right? Or they say maybe the marriage was so deteriorating. Patrick was cheating on her. There was abuse or other bad things happening. I think the truth is Patrick was naive. He didn't see the signs. And we're going to get into her journal entry soon because I have a theory about her her her her state of mind and soul. But I think that he was ultimately she was on a pedestal. That's what he did. She was on a pedestal. She was his wonderful wife, his perfect wife. Everything was great. And it kind of had to be great for him to psychologically survive the marriage, even though it was deteriorating. And then even after the murders of his kids, he still had to believe Lindsay was great. Because to believe that it was a lie and that she was not great and everything was a mess. And not just a mess because she was mentally ill. She he acknowledged she was mentally ill. He was trying to help with the babysitting and hiring the nanny. And you know, she was getting the in-laws and her parents actually her parents were coming to stay over. But he had to believe that oh, this is just a rough patch. She's going through. 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I'm going to come back to the Senate minute. Even if you go insane, you lose your complete will for 15 minutes and manually strangle to death, you're struggling, crying children one after the next. And then just wake up out of the stupor and now you're not in the stupor anymore. And oh my God, what have I done? But you don't say, oh my goodness, what have I done? You're just like, I'm not guilty. You should forgive me guys. That's a psychopath guys. That's not a woman suffering with postpartum psychosis. That's a woman I would argue who has has a mental illness. But I think deeper, there's a soul illness because there's no, I'm sorry. There's no, I'm sorry. So quick round up here. You all know the case we're already talking about it. But bottom line is this trial was ongoing for several weeks, several weeks, five weeks of testimony, seven days of deliberation, the jury was hung. It could not reach the anonymous verdict. There was one juror who said, I cannot basically say that she's not guilty by reason of insanity. So the judge declared a mistrial just a few weeks ago on September 4th, 2026, it will likely be, be tried again to recap. Lindsey Clancy has not apologized. She's not apologized to Patrick. She's not apologized to the public to our knowledge. She's not apologized to other family members. The grandmothers, the two grandmothers and the two grandpas of these little kids, do my knowledge into the public's record. She's not apologized to her kids, their memory that she did this act or to God. She has been saying through her attorney that she is not guilty by reason of insanity, that she did not have control, that a command voice, she heard a voice. Now, only times you heard a voice according to her own testimony. And her defense team's testimony, I should say, is when she was murdering the kids. She was never diagnosed with postpartum depression. Even after seeing multiple mental healthcare providers, she was never diagnosed with postpartum psychosis. She never heard voices before or after the murders of her kids. It was only during this is what she told afterwards as part of her defense. And her argument is that she was insane completely due to postpartum psychosis and the anti-psych meds, the psych meds. And that's why she murdered the kids. And she had no control over it. And again, if somebody was truly insane and out of control and did the unthinkable heinous acts, the human response afterwards, if you're not a sociopath and you didn't calibrate it and plan it, right, is to say, I'm so sorry, I can't believe I did that, I'm so sorry, that has not happened. Let's get into briefly Massachusetts law here, because this has been played a huge part in the trial. This trial has been in tried in Massachusetts. Under Massachusetts law, which is very unusual, this is not the case for many states in America. The burden of proof is on the prosecution who are taking the case to court to prove that the person that is committing had committed the alleged crime, in this case murder of three children, are not insane. So the prosecution doesn't just have to prove you did it. The prosecution has to prove you did it and you're not insane. Now, that's a very difficult thing to prove for any prosecution when you have a patient or a person who has any kind of mental illness in their background. And by the way, most Americans today have had some sort of mental illness in their background. The majority of people at some point have either been diagnosed with some sort of mental illness or experience some sort of anxiety, depression or other condition. And I think the number is a fourth to a third of all mothers are on some sort of medications, most of it psychiatric medication. So pretty much most of us have mental illness, right? When I was a teenager, I suffered depression and I was on medication for depression for two years, a low dose of lexapro between the ages of 16 and 18. I went to therapy and I was able to get off of that thankfully and be able to really do a lot in my own healing. But when I'm trying to say, most of us have had an experience or know someone who has had an experience with mental illness in Massachusetts, take that as the wide broad swath of the population because Massachusetts, like any other state's going to have a lot of people having mental illness. Now, if somebody with mental illness in their history goes and shoots somebody, that's now an opportunity for their defense team to say they were mentally ill. Now, the standard is of course, high to some degree, you have to prove that they were really out of their mind, but this is a powerful tool that the defense can use and did use, of course, in Lindsay's trial. Now, in the aftermath we've seen her called a feminist icon, her attorney, Kevin Reddington has said she's amazing. She's a wonderful person, her defense attorney. She's being called a feminist icon because she's helping mainstream conversation about women's postpartum health. That's the framing that has happened in the public sphere around this case. Now, what I haven't seen talked enough about is the women in past years who have committed heinous acts against their children, who were able to get insanity, not guilty by reason of insanity and their outcomes. And I think this is very telling and educational. So I want to run through some cases. Andrea Yates was the Texas mother who drowned her children in a bathtub and was ultimately declared not guilty by reason of insanity and remains in a mental health asylum now and has been offered multiple times for the opportunity to even potentially leave the mental health asylum after getting a evaluation done and she refuses. She wants to be locked up for life. Constance Fisher was a young mother in Waterville, Maine in the mid-1950s and she also drowned her three young children, Richard Six Daniel foreign Deborah 11 months in a bathtub. She left a note saying she did it to protect them from evil and then she attempted suicide. She was found. She was entered into a psychiatric ward. She was also declared not guilty by reason of insanity. I don't think the case was even tried because they just said she's not guilty by reason of insanity. She was let out of the asylum after about a year because her symptoms cleared up. She seemed reasonable and rational and she we know she wasn't guilty for what she did. So why make her stay in there longer if she was not guilty and she seems fine now and the doctors wrote her office fine. They let her out. She got back together with her husband who by the way, I think psychologically kind of similar to Patrick Clancy in some ways, he could not believe that it was her fault. It had to not be her fault for him to survive. And so he was like, well, it wasn't her fault and she's better now. The doctors are saying she's better. So I'm going to marry her. I'm going to get back and stay married to her and get back together with her. Constance gets back together with her husband. Constance Fisher has three more children with her husband. And then on a fateful day, years later, when the children are the next three kids are roughly the same ages as the prior three children that she murdered, her husband came home from work to find her children dead one at a time in their beds. One of them was dead in the bathtub again drowned. And she attempted another suicide at another act of taking her own life. And at this point, she ends up in another mental asylum and they're thinking, hey, maybe we shouldn't have let her out, but the point is she reoffended. And so why am I bringing this up? I'm bringing this up because historically, even back in the 50s, we were looking at mothers that murdered their children and saying, maybe they just didn't intend to do it at all and we should let them off the hook legally for this and just give them mental health care and that'll make it all better. But my position is there's more going on than this. People are not just the health of their brains. People have souls. People have their life experiences, the stories they tell themselves. And I think for Lindsay, it was much more complex than just psych meds made her do it. And so let me unpack a little bit about my theory on Lindsay Clancy and what was the motive for why she took the lives of her kids. And I will say I watched the trial. And I believe that the prosecution up until the end, there was a there was a sea change at the end, but the prosecution for the bulk of the trial did a poor job. They did a poor job of showing motive for Lindsay and helping jurors understand how she could have done such a heinous act and have free will involved. But after looking at a lot of the materials and thinking and praying about this case more, this is my takeaway. Let's quickly look at the fact pattern. So as I said earlier, she hadn't heard voices at any other time. She claims she heard a male command voice as part of why she killed the kids. She waited till her husband left the house. And she sent him on an errand. And according to his testimony, I believe the kids were eating chicken nuggets and their pajamas when they left. So they weren't like fighting. There wasn't anything crazy going on apparently. They could have blown up after Patrick left the house. And within a short period of time, she had taken the children one by one down to the basement to strangle them. And the first child she took was Dawson, her three-year-old. I want to talk about the way that Lindsay saw her children, the way she told the story of her children to herself in her own journals and her own public comments on social media. Let's start with this Facebook post. This is a post from Lindsay on Facebook asking for advice about her son, Dawson. And this is at the time when Dawson is 19 months old. So he's like in just a tiny toddler. She says, "Hello lovely parents. I'm looking for some advice, solidarity ideas, something, anything. I'm truly finding my 19 month old to be the most difficult human I've ever encountered. I mean that with all love, of course, but I honestly cannot make it through a day without getting so frustrated with him. He is not my first child, so compare, so not to compare because I know that every child is different, but this isn't my first rodeo. Every single thing with him is a battle. It has been this way for a while since maybe he was eight months old. I really try to pick my battles, but I mean everything getting out of his crib, changing his diaper, getting him dressed, getting him in seat, getting him in the car, getting him in his jacket, etc., is a battle with him. He fights me every step of the way and all of it's all of these very normal daily activities. It constantly feels like I have to force him to do these things which feels so wrong because he's always fighting me and crying about doing these very normal things. Now, here's the deal. Kids at that age, little boys, especially I think in some ways, can be very strong will. They're discovering for the first time in their lives that they have a will and that they can say no. That's why besides mama and papa, often a kid's first word can be no because they are so determined to realize that they are not just an extension of their mother that they're their own person and they're just very early in their self-awareness and consciousness. So it's very normal to have to find it behavior like this in a toddler. Now, it sounds like Lindsey was surprised by this behavior because it wasn't the behavior of her first child, which is a little girl, Kora. And I think I can see other moms who are zero evil intent towards their kids in the future could say similar things, complaining about their kids not listening to them, right? Because I think, you know, this is a standard part of childhood. This is less about for me, Lindsey Clancy having evil motives, shirts, or kids. I don't think that's what's going on here, but it's more about for for me, the expert. limitations that Lindsey Clancy had about motherhood, because then this is one initial snapshot that I want to share, but there's a bunch more I'm going to get to. But my part of my theory is that Lindsey Clancy had expectations for motherhood of what it should feel like, what it should be like, that we're not being met. And one of the expectations was that you shouldn't have such a defiant 19-month-year-old. The former baby wasn't, the past baby Korra, the older girl, but this one was so difficult and this is somehow not usual, what's wrong with me, what's wrong with him. Why is this happening? And I think for a lot of moms, you know, going to the 100,000-foot view here, we think, oh, this is not normal. Why is this hard? Or why is it going this way? When the reality is kids are kids, like they're figuring out the world themselves, and we as parents are figuring it out alongside them and helping them. And sometimes it's messy, sometimes it's really hard. And I think for Lindsey, she was a nurse in her background professionally. She was really obsessed by her own account with parenting advice. She wanted to just nail it. She wanted to get 100% on the score. She wanted everything to be perfect. She wanted the nap schedule to be perfect. She wanted the day schedule to be perfect. She wanted the nutrition to be perfect. She wanted the sleep schedule to be perfect. She wanted the developmental milestones to be perfect. She wanted the behavior to be perfect. She had this very heavy standard for herself and her kids that everything had to be on time a certain way and pretty much perfect. And the reality is that's not how it is. And that reality was really hard for her to take. And she was constantly wrestling against that reality of it was not perfect. It was not the way that she would want to design it. It was not this ideal way. And so she was constantly feeling emotionally down or low or even numb because of that. Let's pull up some more examples. How do you pray? And I don't mean how do you think you should pray. I mean, how do you actually pray? Maybe you've been praying for decades, maybe for months, or maybe you don't even know how to get started. You can pray at any moment, any time, by just opening your heart to God. But tools can be really helpful too. 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If you want to have great coffee at your doorstep every month, head on over to 7weekscoffee.com and save 15% forever when you subscribe, and pair it with my code "Lyla" for an extra 10% off and a great gift. That's 25% off your first order with code "Lyla". Support moms, babies, and enjoy great coffee with 7weekscoffee.com. Code "Lyla" for an extra 10% off. Here are some other bits from her journal, which you're read in the courtroom. I'm sad and depressed, I'm sad that I stop breastfeeding, I'm feeling not as connected to Cal and now. I think I sort of resent my other children because they prevent me from treating Cal like my first baby, and I know that's not fair to them. I was feeling so depressed last evening when Korra and Dawson came home from school. I want to feel love and connection with all my kids, I'm probably having a bit of an eternal conflict because my whole life I've wanted to have a lot of kids. Now, she had this narrative of story she told herself that motherhood was going to be amazing, she wanted to have a lot of kids and it was going to go a certain way, she had an expectation for how it was going to go. And then she starts to have more children, you know, Dawson is more difficult than Korra. And then Cal and the new baby, she can't give the same treatment to Cal and that she gave to Korra because now she has two other little kids running around the house. And this made her really upset inside, like deeply upset. Her journal entries are all about how upset she is that her life is not the way she wants it. But when you take a few steps back and look at her life, it was actually pretty standard. She had a husband who worked from home a lot of the time. She had relatives who lived close by enough and visited often. She had a nanny at one point helping her out. She took leave from work at one point. She had limited hours at another point. She had the preschool of the day care helping at another point. It's not like she had three children with terminal illnesses and had no money and her husband had walked out on them, right? It wasn't some extreme cases what I'm trying to say. It was challenging because raising children can be challenging. But if your expectations for what it should be are so far off from where it really is and you're desperately unhappy about it. You're going to be increasingly feeling like you're trapped, like you're ungrateful for your life, like you want to get out, just get out of your life. And so yes, was mental illness a playing a role? Of course, of course it was. That's objectively, I think, part of the case study. But the idea that it happened solely because of mental illness, she had no control at all, I think, is a very dangerous idea. Let's read some more of these notes. I'm struggling so hard because I wanted to parent each of my kids like my first and since I can't, that's depressing to me. So she was very fixated and I'll say the idea that she had to parent them a certain way and then she got depressed when she cut it. This is definitely the root cause of all our problems. Now I feel like I'm not parenting any of my kids the way I want to and that makes me sad. And then she says about Kalan and sleep training, I hate that he has to put himself to sleep. I'm sad I'm not breastfeeding but I think ultimately these are the right choices. So she's talking about how she doesn't like the setup but she feels like she has to do it. I don't want Kalan to be her last but I have a lot of figuring out to do. I'm on the fence about new medication, I just want to feel happy. I want to relax, take care of my kids and when they go to bed at night, I want to deeply relax and then sleep for a full eight hours, have a deep sleep for eight hours. Now the last time I got sleep for eight hours, I also have three children six, four and two. I don't think I've had eight hours of like consistent sleep. I don't know, maybe in years, and I'm not saying this to like even to either brag or for you to feel sorry for me. I'm saying that when you're in the trenches with young kids, you sleep when you can and you don't sleep as much as you used to sleep. Now you have to still take care of yourself, right? And I think Lindsey was trying to take care of herself. Patrick was trying to take care of them. They were going to mental health experts, they were trying to get, you know, he'd take the kids to school in the morning so she could sleep in things like that. But at the end of the day, it wasn't good enough because it didn't meet the standard that she had set for herself and for her kids. And I think that standard in the end is what tipped her over the line. That standard in the end. When she tried to take her life, it was because her life wasn't the way she wanted it. She tried to take her life, it was because yes, she felt depressed, but she didn't want to keep living the life that she had. There's something called altruistic filiside. It's a term that I don't fully agree with, but it at least explains or at least it, I should say, it's a descriptor of this condition that some people have when they murder their families. And a lot of men do this, but some women do it too. In altruistic filiside, it's this idea that you take the life of your kids out of some form of love because you believe that your kids are an extension of yourself and you're planning often to kill yourself and you can't imagine your kids living without you. This is actually a deep form of narcissism where you don't actually love your kids for their sake of themselves. You only love your kids for how they make you feel. You only love your kids for how they are sort of a benefit to you. And if your life isn't worth living anymore, then your kids life isn't worth living either. And I think in Lindsay Clancy's case, she had decided her life was not worth living anymore. Ultimately, I think what may have happened, again, this is a theory, so I cannot know for sure. But I think what may have happened is she had pent up rage and resentment. She had even confessed homicidal thoughts towards them in her soul, not just in her mental illness, but in her soul. In her, the depths of her soul, she didn't like her life. She didn't like her motherhood. It wasn't what she had expected her planned. And in her soul, she didn't want it anymore. And so she was planning to take her life, but she couldn't imagine her kids living without her. She wanted to take them to. And so what Lindsay Clancy did on that fateful day in Doxbury, Massachusetts in January 2023, is she went one child at a time and she took Dawson first. She took the little boy that was the most difficult first. The one that never did what she wanted because now she was going to do to him what she wanted. And she walked him down those gloomy steps into the basement. And she took him to the dad's office part of the basement to her to dad's office. And she turned him around and used incredible strength over a period of minutes. to slowly strangle this squirming, wiggling, fighting boy to death, and they said, according to the prosecution and the court documents and the first responders, the injuries done to Dawson's neck were more extreme than the injuries to Kora, the older girl, or Kalim the little baby. And the blood that was literally coming out of his eyes and the bruising because of the strangling was more extreme than it was in the other kids. And so this is a theory, could it be that she took out all of that frustration, all of that resentment, all of that existential angst against life itself, against the neck and the life of her son Dawson? And then she went back upstairs after his body stopped moving and she brought Kora downstairs and did the same to her. And then she did it to the baby. And then it could be that after she murdered those kids, she kind of came off of the high, it was like this high of like, okay, I finally did it. I finally did it. She's in this like super. She did it. And then she's like, oh my gosh, I have to do it to myself now. So she went up to her bedroom, locked the door, and then crushed some pills, maybe drank a little bit of it, took a knife, made very superficial cuts. They were not deep cuts. She still wasn't dead yet. I think she was afraid to kill herself in the end. I think she was afraid to go deep with that knife. I think it could be that she was afraid to kill herself in the end. It could be that she was afraid to go deeper with that knife into her own body. She didn't have that fear when she was strangling the kids. They were done. But she loved her life more than she loved theirs. She had a natural love for her life more than a natural love for theirs. So she was able to end their lives, but when she had the task to end her own life, she couldn't go through with it. The cuts were superficial. The high was, she was off the high, and it's like, what am I going to do? And they said there were blood stains on the windowsill as if she had slipped down slowly, not jumped out. And she fell in a way that didn't look like she had just jumped out and fallen, but that she had fallen out, holding onto the sill. It was a second story window. It's not very high. It could be that after not being able to fully take her life, cutting herself, because she loved her life little too much, naturally, to do it. She fell off the window thinking at least it will look like I tried to take my life. Because I can't actually bring myself to fully do it. And then of course, it's discovered. She sees her husband. There's no I'm sorry. There's no how are the kids. There's no remorse. She's taken into the hospital. Some of the first things that she asks for when she has the opportunity is a lawyer. She ultimately asks to talk to Patrick and acts like he should just not even be mad at her, ultimately. You know, there's no I'm so sorry, I can't believe I did this. And then she says, I am not guilty by reason of insanity and you guys have to prove that I am. And there you have it, the Lindsay Clancy case. Now this is a theory. This is one way to see this information. But I share this because I am concerned that we do not take seriously enough the lives of children that we are too quick to come up with excuses as adults. It was mental illness in the case of abortion. I had to have the abortion because of my finances in the case of, you know, not feeling like I'm ready for it or my health would be impacted. And we're so quick to discount the lives of children because of the goals, the suffering, the rationalizations of adults. And I think a lot of that is happening with this case, with the coverage of this case. And ultimately I think there does need to be justice for these three children for Korra, Dawson and for Callan. And I'm glad that this case is going to be retried already. We have a million abortions a year. We treat unborn children like they're completely discardable. But I would hate to live in a country where in addition to that evil, we treat born children that way. And if born children are a burden and we feel mentally insane or ill, then we can get off Scott free if we brutally take the lives of born children. That is a death cult country. And it's not one that I want to live in. And I want to end with this. Motherhood is really beautiful. Becoming a mother has taught me more love and expanded my heart more than anything else. Motherhood is fraught with a lot of temptations. It has suffering, it has challenges. And if we enter motherhood with an attitude of ultimately love and receiving God's love to be able to give it back to the kids that we're entrusted with and espouse we may have, motherhood is transformative in a beautiful way. And yes, there can be mental illness in motherhood. There can be mental illness outside of motherhood. And it needs treatment, it needs care, but the soul also needs care. And our souls need to be filled with the truth that love is always worth it. Life is always worth fighting for and children deserve our love and protection no matter what. We can't judge Lindsey Clancy's soul and we shouldn't even attempt to, but we should take a look at this case in what it means. And I think we should pray. Pray for Lindsey, pray for Patrick, pray for all mothers and fathers, pray for people in prison, pray for people with mental struggles, and of course pray for children in the protection of all children. Let me know your guys' thoughts. 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