Don't Start Fake Wars with a Fake Person

Hey, everybody. We got new merch and these, I mean, this is, this was a traumatic day in my life. Yeah, really well. When I fell over and I was bullied a little bit online, but, um, from Andrew, but, you know, I didn't, but this is key. I, you laughed like a hyena. But let me say something. We, we have it on a shirt now. And we have it on a long sleeve, short sleeve like that. And on this hoodie, which we absolutely love. So go to badfriendsmerch.com to grab it. Badfriendsmerch.com. You two are bad friends. You are these two idiots. Like, dude, as you do. You two are disgusting. Oh, you two are something. For bad friends. Ooh, dear Lord. Thank you for the familiars. Thank you for the meal on my plate. I'm grateful to you. Thank you, native for all of the land. We gave you casinos. Cut off your hands. Sorry about the smallpox. The things that we gave you. The blanket was nice, but it full with disease. Sorry, sorry natives. Whoops are bad. Yeah. That's, that's, that's, that's giving. Sorry natives. Whoopsie are bad. We really did a lot of damage, and we named our sports teams after your leaders. I love dances with walls. I love last summer. He comes favorite movies of all time and minute. Tonka shoes. Amen. Amen to that. Yeah. We love them. You know, I, you know, I, um, I've collaborated with some natives in my life. I really, yeah, you did great on that. I really enjoy, um, people and the culture. And, um, we want to say, um, thank you. We do love all of our native fans. We do have a lot of native fans. We love mong. I know this native mong is not native. I understand that, but we do love them. We love the mong people. Yeah, the mong people. They're mountain people. We love, there isn't a group of people we don't like. Yeah. I really want what you say for us. No, we really. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Let me think of the thing. What group of people don't we like on the count of three? One, two, three, ascamos. Oh, what? What did you say? Jerks. Oh, jerks. Jerks. I said escamos. Oh, wow. Yeah. Why don't you like escamos? There's snowballs. They hurt so bad. Because you know what they do is they, they hawk them. No, no, they, they make it. And then they overnight, it freezes into an ice ball. Oh, yeah. And they read it. It's very, there he is. Come on. Look at how cute that guy is. They're the best. That's a girl. I can't even tell. See, escamos. They were ahead of the trend. Yeah. That's a gender that is a fluid person. It's a fluid. Yeah. I don't know who that is. Look at that nose. They love the kiss with the nose. Eskimo kisses. Yeah. You want to do an escomo kiss? Merry Christmas. No, happy Thanksgiving. Yeah. I mean, how do they tongue? I mean, that's it, right? There's no way to get more, you know, because when you're kissing, right, you can, you know, you do close mouth in the beginning. You kind of figure out what their style is. And then you dart in the tongue. And sometimes you do, you know, I mean, like washing machine. Dart. Well, it's like wrestling. You got to find a way. You can't. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. How is that working out? That technique. It works. It's pretty good. Probably 10,000 times I've done it. Right. Most of them have. But with an escomo, how do you get more, you know, me intimate with it? Well, they have sex, bud. And I'm just out of the kissing style. Oh, brother, I don't think escomo. Maybe they blow. Maybe they blow snot into the other hole. That's actually smart. Yeah. Yeah. That could be cool. Oh, I just saw predator battle lines. Cundo. Cundo. Dude, that will be due last night. What a movie. So good. So good. But the movie is because you never watched. You never watched the movies. I recommend that you never sell weapons. I couldn't. Why? Now I wasn't allowed. Yeah. It's right in R. Yeah, but I am not allowed. Would you have what predator movies have you seen? The original. That's the only one. That's the best one. Did you see pray? No. Pray. Incredible. Same director. I've only seen the original. You got to watch pray. You got to watch this. It's incredible. You saw it? Yeah. Incredible, right? So far. What do you think it's about? Tell me predator badland. Yeah. Yeah. Well, give me a photo. Give me an image. I can tell you story. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Very easy. You're very good at this. This is probably one of my best quality. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Let's go to. Yeah. That one. That photo. Oh, it's about immigration. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This is all about immigration. Yeah. But it's the reverse. Right. Yeah. I mean, because in this time, America is going real bad. Yeah. And Mexico's thriving. Right? So yeah. Which one is the Mexican? Fancy. Watch it. Fancy. Watch it, pal. Yeah. And right there, you know where there are El Paso right there. That's El Paso. Yeah. And they're trying to get into Oras. Right. Right. So he to make it easier, he slices or have. No, just rips her body off. Yeah. Yeah. In half. Well, because that's probably easier to get her across. Yeah. And her name is Karen for some reason. Yeah. Why? I don't know why. But her name is Karen. And she's like, you know what? Hey, Raul or. Yeah. That's why we'll. Yeah. Whatever your name is. This is one of her lines. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like dude, I'm not like climbing any fences. Okay. I'm not gonna go in any body of water. Find a way. Is that El Panning? Yeah. She's great at it. This girl is so fucking good. She's so good. She's good in everything now. Yeah. Yeah. It's almost like her career has flourished the most the last like five years, right? Complete unknown. She was killed in unbelievable. Unbelievable. And who's the actor playing the predator? Is that Jacob Allority again? No, I've never seen him before, but he's very good at it. So this is the problem. Look at zoom in. Look at all handsome. This guy is then they put him in that mask. Right. So you don't even get to see how handsome he is. Yeah. So pick an ugly guy for that. This is my problem with Hollywood. Just let him go do that. You can't give that to us. It's in a mask. Well, you have to have the body. What do you know? You don't? What do you mean? It's just a fucking suit. No, he's not wearing a, I mean, he's wearing like probably late tech stuff on the arms. You're telling me that's it. Let me see the full body. You can see the armor behind him. Can I give you the premise or no? It's not about immigration, I guess. I think you're a little wrong. I think the premise of this is predator. Okay. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. So predator is there's a new regime taking over and he is against it. He's like the renegade. And she is, he falls in love with her. And he's trying to protect her because they're going to kill, they're going to kill her. Could you why? They're killing off all the carans. Yeah. Yeah. The killing of the carans. And he loves her. And he says the only way for this to work is if I cut you in half, I'll reassemble you later. Yeah. Because they need to think you're dead. And now they're on the run. He's reassembled her and they're, and they're on the run from the regime. Pretty close. Am I close? Nope. All right. What is it? What is it? Well, should I be real about it? I don't want to give any spoilers away. Well, you don't have to spoil it when you give the premise of the movie. I'll give you the premise of the movie. Okay. So he's, you know, here's what I like about the movie, right? You never get insight in terms of the culture of whoever the predators are. Right. Am I, do you see the movie? I haven't seen it. Yeah. You're talking like the original predator. Right. You just think it's just the some alien who can camouflage. You know, I mean, cool weapons and they're difficult to kill. I mean, that's pretty much all the predator movies. And now in this, you see, you know, the family dynamics of the predator family of the predator family. And, and it's very North Korean, I believe. Yeah. Yeah. Is he the young, is that young predator? Like, is he the baby of the family? He's the baby of the family. And because he's smaller than all his brothers, right? Yes, he's dating a white girl. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Man, look, predator can't get himself a night. No, no, he's gay. You know, all gay minorities have like this white girl that's like sticking up for them. Oh, right. Yeah, right. Yeah. The Yau Cha. It's called the Yau Cha. Yeah. And so, um, basically, um, he's the run and the father is like, he needs to die because he's a shame on the family. Ah, right. So, um, he, the little Yau Cha goes, well, can I go to this planet to kill that, this monster that no one can kill? Because they like to hunt. Right. And the father is like, you can't kill that. He does. I'm afraid of it. Oh, wow. Right. And he goes to this, he goes to this, um, planet, Badlands. I don't know what the planet's called. And, um, that's where the big movie begins. That's the beginning of the film. And she's, um, she works for a corporation. Um, she works for like black rock. Yes. Sort of like black rock. But she's an, you know, uh, an android. And she was split in half from the, from that creature. She's a humanoid. She's half human, half, no, she's fully an android. Oh, she's no human at all. There's no humans in the movie. Should be a really good movie. Um, so it's worth it though. Yeah. Can you do this? I just, I, before I can get, I won't get this off my chest real quick. like, um, can you stop telling me to send me, uh, send you my, my dead dead photos? What are you talking about? I was in Mexico with some friends. Yeah. So one in the morning, this guy calls me and he goes, yo, he goes, send me photos of your dead, that, that, that, I go, why is that? My friends want to see it. I was telling the story. Uh, I was telling the story of how this podcast was. Kind of birthed and at the beginning, what had happened with your dad and how daddy, why you died, became a thing. Yeah. And then one of the guys was like, that's crazy, though, the picture thing. And he's, and he was like, that's not real though. I was like, that's very real. Yeah. And he was like, no, I go, okay. And I called you. I was like, will you send me a picture of your dead, dad? Yeah. And they showed it to him. I haven't I said, by the way, this is a big star. Yeah. I sent it to everybody. Really? I air dropped it to all of them. Yeah. I'll have it now. They're going to blow one up and put it in their house. So what, um, when you showed it to him, what happened? I was a king of the party for a couple of minutes. Yeah. Did they laugh or everyone was shocked. It wasn't as funny as I thought. Obviously, yeah, yeah. It's not funny. Well, the second photo of your dad is weirder because it, one of them is like a selfie with your dad and the other one, your mom's crying, but you're straight forward. Yeah, yeah. No, I'm not in that photo. The second one you're in. Yeah, but that was like a, um, camera set up that the timer thing. So funny. And then I had to run around, which is always, you know, imagine you set the timer and your dad's body moves a little bit and you're like, hold on, set it again. Yeah, yeah. But the first one I sent you is the most tragic one because right when my dad dies, I catch my mom crying and my brother's just like, he makes a face that he's like, yeah, he's in shock. Yeah, he's in shock. That's Steve's shock. That's Steve, yeah, yeah, yeah, and it's a brutal photo. But I like that you sent it and I appreciate you. I needed to show everyone what you ruined. Whatever part of you were at, I think pretty hard. Yeah, it was pretty bad. Nobody liked it. No, they loved it. No, they loved it. That was funny. Yeah. Well, when I sent it to the Hudson, they didn't like it. Remember? That's weird. They didn't like it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was in Mexico. You got to show something fun in Mexico. We were, we were scared in Mexico. It was right, right, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Walking the streets of Mexico. Yeah, laid it. Now you're getting some tacos. Mm. I love Mexico. Is it good tacos? So good. Tell me about the tacos. Oh, and we're beer, beer, beer, beer, what is that? And they were shaving it off in front of you. I was like, Oh, God, it was so good. Oh, I love when they do that. And they shave it and the cheese is on top. They cut a little slice of cheese, throw it in there. Yeah, the guy was a fucking magician. And then the little woman next to him was hand-making. Tateyes, oh, dude. It's so good. I love Mexico. My mother's watering. It's so delicious. Yeah, right up, right up, right up, right up, right up. 10, are you a spit, right up the spit? That's the town spit, Mexico. Where is it? It's called nice. Nice? Nice. Oh, nice. Nice. Noise Mexico. Nice. Yeah. No ice. It was called no ice, Mexico. Nice. No, we're in Cabo. You're in Cabo. Cabo is fun. Yeah, it's fun. Cabo is so fucking rad. And it's actually, I haven't been in like a decade. Yeah. Loved. Really? Oh, dude, I love Cabo. Yeah. Although the ocean. I've been to Tulum. Tulum's great. Yeah, yeah. You know, I'm always afraid in foreign countries. Why? Because they're, they're going to steal my organs. I don't know why I have that fear, but like I'm going to wake up. You look like them. They don't want you. I was going to say something like that. No, because you, no, no, that's, that's not the right. No, I'm going to argue against that. Oh, like your liver is American. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, that's it. We too big for Uncle Pedro. - Too big, huh? - Yeah, like 55 times more, too big. I'm not gonna be able to get in there. - He has a lump on the side like, is, (laughing) You know, it's pancreas. (laughing) - Yeah. - They don't have a tuber, yeah. - Yeah, but they're not gonna be able-- - $50, like, you know, 2000, two, a couple grand. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - No, we what? - Yeah. - My liver is $50? - No way, his liver's worth way more than mine. - Yes. - I have a bunch of alcohol running through mine. - They don't know that, I'm looking. - Well, he's got a GLP one in his though. - Yeah, there's benefits for my organs. - On the black market, a human liver can be worth anywhere from 50 grand to 550,000. - That's what I'm saying. - Vote down below, fans. What's our liver worth? - Yeah. - Winner, winner, check, and dinner. We have finally have a winner of the Great British Baking Show this season. - I didn't see it, finish it. I have two more. Can I guess though? - Yeah, I'm excited for the guess. - It's that tall, good-looking gay guy. - Interesting. - You know who I'm talking about? - Of course. He's so cute, looks like a surfer. - But I'm not gonna tell you yes or no. - Oh no. - Well, you wanna know. - It's either him or the lady that has no hair. - Okay. - The blonde, the bald lady. - It's not bald. She has alopecia. - She's not bald. - She's not like a Midwestian. - It could have been a fashion thing. - No, no, well, she talks about it almost every episode that she has alopecia. - Oh really? - They're very clear. - Here's why I don't know that. - They're clear about it every time. - I tell you why, I don't know that. - I don't know the whole thing to get to the very end. - No, I just fast forward during the judging parts. - That's the most important part. - Right, so I don't know of the backstory of people, like you don't think follow them back. - Yeah, you're not invested in that. - Yeah, I'm not invested in that. - I am. - Yeah, I love it. - Yeah, but anyway, is it either one of those two? Is it? - Maybe. - I think so. - Okay. - Yeah. - You're gonna find out in the next two days. - I might not watch it, tell me. - It's jazz. - That's great. - She's awesome. - Yeah, she's awesome. - The ones that, or haven't watched you yet, too bad. - Well, you know, you, I mean, it's been out for a couple. - This is my test show with dating. - Oh, this show? - Yeah. - What do you mean? - So, you know, sometimes when the first time somebody would spend the night in my house, it's a test show. - Right, I think you-- - So I'll go, I'll go, and you watch me, I'll go. Like, what is that? - I go, I'm watching episodes, my favorite shows. And half of it during it, sometimes I'll go, or they'll fall asleep. - And then you can't trust it. - I can't do it. - See, when I was dating, I put, I always put on American History X. That was my-- (laughing) - I know if you're asleep. - Well, when girls come over, I go, what do you think? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And if they really got in. - Yeah. - You know, if they were into it. There's a couple of movies I would show girls and I was dating to make sure that they were kind of like-- - Mine's a cock of orange. - That's good. Very good. Yeah, American Psycho, kind of like some easy watching stuff. - Yeah. - Stuff that's like, yeah. - Do you like that? That is really interesting when you start dating a girl. What do you show her first to see if she's on your wavelength of either music or film? - I don't think girls like that. - What? - Music and film with the fun. - No, it gives them the ink when guys are like, you have to watch these three things, or I don't like you. - Well, no, I don't like-- - You say it. - I know, but they know you're-- - They know you're doing it. - No, but it's-- - No, they know. - They know. - No. - It's a test. - I'm on gay Instagram. I know this. No, no, no. Here's the thing. Here, can I say it? - All right. - It's your show. - Oh, okay, thank you. - Damn, dude, he's 2D Rudy. - Dude, you're 2D Rudy, but for foodie. - You got Rudy 2D foodie? - Yeah, I don't like it, dude. - You're a little meany-weeny. What's going on with you today? - Yeah, I'm not meany. - What happened this morning? What did you do this morning? - I had a bad night. A girl texted me last night. Like, I'm never talking to you again and all this stuff. I was like, what could have happened? - Did you sleep with her? - Yeah. - That's probably what happened. - No, she texted me sex, why are N? And I wrote N. And then she got really mad and two days later. - Why N? - Why N? - Because I was watching F1. And then after that, I watched Top Gun. And I didn't want to be intro. - It was a great race. - Yeah. No, no, no, the movie was right there. - Oh, I thought you were talking about F1 that just happened. - No, no, I was watching movies and I didn't want to deal with it and then a couple of days later. - Wait a minute, you could, okay. Well, yeah, dude, I think the response is not- - I've done that. - The response is not N. The response is, I would love to, I can't now. - No, I lied instead I was out of town and everything was a whole thing. He did like my grandma died again? - I said I was in national partying. I made like a really- - Can we go back to what I- - Again, it's your show? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - You know, I wasn't- - This is what I- - I tell he was flustered though. - I did, I, you wanna know the truth? I got extorted twice in the past five weeks. - What do you mean? - Extorted. - By whom? - Once a gangster and another a girl. - Tell me the gangster extortion. - I got a call from a gangster and he was like, give me all this money or I'm gonna leak all this stuff about you online and then he texted me on WhatsApp and then they were gonna come to my house. I had to call the police, it was a whole thing. I think McDonald's. - Yeah, he called me. - Yeah, I called him. So I was like, I'd take like Xanax. I was like freaking out. It was crazy. - Oh, that's terrible. - Burying the fucking leaves. Where the fuck is this shit? - It's so real. - It was too real. He don't wanna talk about it. - Yeah. - Wait a minute, how does somebody get your phone number? And what do they have to leak about you? Like, do you- - I think he thought I was married still. No, I don't have nudes on the internet or anything. He even had all my phone for this. - And they threatened to leak your information. - The word gangster is a little suspicient. - It's just some roll. - It was like a Mexican. - If you don't give me a money. - If a Mexican dude threatened to like harm you, that's a gangster. - Oh, so it was a Mexican dude. You heard his voice. - Yeah, he like read me my address. - Oh, give me the voice. - He heard his voice. - Yes. - And he wouldn't let me hang up. It was all the tales of someone trying to- - So you got through it. You got extorted by a gangster and then extorted by someone else. I mean, you're so extortable. - A girl I went out with three years ago, texted me a couple weeks ago with a- like an Apple Pay request for like a couple grand. And she was like, give me this or I'm gonna leave gossip about you online. And I don't know what that really means. - One time, on Tiger Belly, I said black people are oily. (laughing) - I remember that. - Yeah, you remember that? I don't even know what that means, I just said it, right? And so then this black lady on my direct message is like, if you don't give me this amount of money, I'm gonna put this out into the world. I go, I just sit in on my pond. (laughing) - You heard me? - Starting out. - It's already out. Like what, the 20 used what I said already, that I said out loud against me. I'm like, it's already on the internet. - Do you have Venmo requests? - I do. - Yeah. - Yeah. - You don't? - You put your name on there. I don't put my name on there. - Oh, that's right. - Yeah, on Venmo, you're like asking for them to ask for money. - Yeah. - I read their stories, though. (laughing) - Domino, listen, you know what? They have stepped up their game. Well, they got specialty pizzas. That's the big thing. - Yeah, you know what? - Specialty, it's not the old school. - That's my favorite word. - Specialty or pizza. - Both. - You like specialties? - Yeah, yeah. - I love this one. This is the spicy chicken bacon ranch. Look at that thing. That's got chicken, that's got jalapenos. - That thing is so good, dude. - And it's got mozzarella. 100% real mato finished off with a drizzle of buffalo sauce. You love buffalo sauce. - Oh yeah, what about this? What about this one? - What's that? - We had the extravaganza. - Extravaganza. I already ate a piece, it was delicious. And you know what, what's in this, dude? Pepperoni, ham. - Love. - Italian sauce, beef. - Love. - Fresh onions, fresh green peppers, fresh mushrooms, and black olives, all sandwiched between two layers of provolone and cheese made with 100% real mozzarella. Dude, I'll have another bite. Why not? - Do a full two over. - Huh? - Oh, yeah, babe. - No, extravaganza. - Extravaganza. (laughing) They got the spicy chicken bacon ranch, the people's pizza deluxe, that of extravaganza, and the meatza. The meatza pizza has all the meat you could ever. - The megas. Pepperoni. - Got it. - Ham. - Got it. - There's no way they have the town sausage as well. - You better believe they have that and beef, and it's all sandwiched between two layers of provolone and cheese made with 100% real mozzarella. - Pizza. - Pizza, pizza, pizza. Do you like pizza? We know you do, we like pizza. And if you're looking to order some pizza, you got some friends over, you watch in the game, or you're playing a video game, or you're hanging out in the game of life. - Yeah. - So grab yourself some dominoes. - Draft King Sportsbook. Do you know what the three T's of Thanksgiving are? - No. - Turkey for eating, table for gathering, and touchdowns for winning with draft Kings. - That's right, with draft Kings Sportsbook and official sports betting partner of the NFL. 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Use the discount link in the description, it applies automatically, it check out, or use the code BadFriends. - Use it. - You get 37% off one to two displates, 43% off three to four displates, 46% off five or more displates. - Displates. - Collect your passions. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. (laughing) - Live with me. - I do it long. - Yes. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. My uncle Louie lost his co, you know what I mean? And he's not living in my house. My kids haven't eaten today. I mean, he goes on and on. And I'll just have like a moment, you know what I mean? - Have you ever given money to a stranger like that? - Well, I'll have a moment and I'm like, oh, anyway. And I'll just stop. (laughing) Yeah, yeah. But they're very sad and my heart goes out to them. - Well, I don't read the request. That's insane. - Okay. - You start, you're gonna, 'cause at some point you might get, you maybe you will get suckered into doing it. - Yeah. - How honest that is. - Yeah. - See, to me, I remember as a kid, you know when someone's like, don't give that homeless guy money. He's fucking gonna use it for drugs or whatever. And then the old joke is like, I'm gonna use it for drugs or whatever, you know? But I always give him money because they're out there asking. If you have the balls to ask, I give you some money. - Yeah. - But the internet, who knows if they're fucking with you? On the street, it's like, yeah, dude, you have some fucking money. - Yeah, I've had ex-girlfriends ask. - For money? - Yeah. - What's the most honest? - Yeah, that is, well, no, it's not. It's not that they asked for money. They're just saying, can I have money? But if they say, give me money or else. - Like girls that had seen like for four months or whatever. And it's like, and they just, they're just out, you know, it's tough out there. And that, I can't say no, no. - What's the most amount of money I'm giving to them? - Oh, they're not much, like, you know what I mean? Like, an electrical bill. - Oh. - Yeah, yeah. - That's actually a clever, I'll pay your bill. - Yeah, I'll pay your bill. - I'll pay your bill. - No, I get, I've Venmo, whatever the electrical bill is. I don't give them, I don't ask. - They're not using that for the electrical bill. - Whatever the, whatever the thing is. - Sure. - Yeah, yeah. - By the way, electrical bills, it's a random. (laughing) Do you pay my trash water and power? (laughing) - Yeah. - Remember, I gave you head one time. - Yeah. - You owe me trash water and power. - So you've never loaned a stranger money. - I don't loan friends money either. - You don't. - No, what I will do is give you money. It's not alone. I refuse. And I learned this years ago from an older gentleman who said, don't ever loan people money. You either give it to them or you don't. - Right. - It does not, we'll not come back. It should not come back. It does not exist. - Yeah. - So, do not loan. It'll ruin a friendship. It will. - Yeah. - I would give a friend money before I'd ever be like, "I want it back." - Yeah, you get one though. - No, you get one. - Yeah, you get one. - Better be good. - Yeah, better be a good one. - Or I get people work. That's, if somebody says to me, "I need money." I'll get them a job. I'll find them a job to get them money. - Yeah. - 'Cause then it's easier to go. How about I cook you up with something that I'll give you money? - Yeah. - You know what I mean? I just did. I did a gig I didn't want to fucking do just so someone else would get paid. - I had this girl, it's too dark though. I can't tell. - Give it, give it please. - There was this girl that I met 25 years ago and she was, she was very hot. But she was like, I need money to, I need money, I don't have any money. I go, you can clean my apartment. So she would, once a week, twice a week come over to clean my apartment. - Oh no. - What? - You hooked up with her? - Yeah. - This is a sign fell episode. - Yeah, then I, you know what I mean? One day I was taking a nap while she was cleaning and then I wake up and she's literally in my bed. And I'm like, oh my God, this is amazing. And then we started seeing each other and then months later she disappears. - Stop cleaning, huh? - What? - Stop cleaning. When she started sucking, she stopped cleaning. - Yeah, yeah. And then-- - Place was a mess. - And then when you called for a mom, I was like, have you seen this person? - Are you being serious? - I'm being serious. - She went missing? - She went missing. - She cleaned herself out of existence. - Yeah, you weren't a suspect? - What? - You weren't a suspect? - No. - Okay, key suspect. - No. - Yeah, I mean-- - And then months after that, I get a call and they found her in an abandoned house. I'm not kidding you. In a bathtub completely naked with heroin holes all over her arm and she had OD'd. - How dirty was your house? (laughing) - She'd rather do heroin. (laughing) Then clean your fucking house. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, she'd rather do it. - Damn, you know Polly's like pretending to be mad at us? - I know, it's too bad. - You know this whole bit? - It's bullshit. - You should pretend like you're fucking mad at the guy. - No, I'm not mad at him. 'Cause you don't-- - You don't wanna start a false war with a false person. (laughing) - That's an old proverb that my grandfather used to sell me. - Yeah, the start war with a fake person. - Fake person, yeah, yeah. - Never start to fake war with a fake person. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That should be on everyone's wall. - Yeah. - That's right, Nick's a live laugh love. - So everyone listening, Polly's trying to start a fake war with us. There's no tension. - Okay. - When we see-- - No, this is the game we play. - No, it's fine. I thought you wanted to play-- - No, we're not playing the game. - All right, go ahead. - Yeah, yeah, you never play with it. - Now this will start a real war with Polly. - You'll be mad that you did this. So here's the deal, okay. I don't know what he's trying to do, but he's trying to start something. We're not even aware of it. We don't-- whenever we see him, it's all hugs and kisses. - He's taking a note from the book of How We Mandel. - Elijah. - How we Mandel. - Oh, How We Mandel, yeah, yeah. - It's how he loves this kind of bullshit. - Exactly, yeah, yeah, yeah. - You love him. - Yeah, and then Mandel, the last time I saw him, like, four days ago, a politician profusely for the-- one of them that him waking me up incident. - Oh, yeah. - We talked about that, right? Did we never talk about it on the show? No. Oh, I'll tell everyone that this is my war with how I'm in hell. This is real. Oh, it's not a warning more Inside still a little. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so I I did this movie You know and um It was like all the scenes are with me and howie and a lot of people aren't it, but um, and so this is Jim's movie. No, no, no No, not karate goes. It's not karate goes. No. I'm so excited for that to come out. Same Steve howie's in it already got Where are you? Oh, please Stop. Show yourself. All right. All right. Show yourself. Did you feel that? All right. Go ahead. Anyway, um, and so we're both chefs in in this movie. Anyway, um So we're working all day. We're in every fucking scene and also it was two days of you know That's a spoiler. Yeah, stop that. So take it down. So um Two days straight like five in the morning call time and also me and howie in every scene. Yeah, and it's like you we would wrap like at midnight It was fucking tough. So one the next day Um, we did like five scenes in a row all day, which I'm not complaining. It's just that's how movies are just long days They're long days and I and and finally somebody goes listen, you're not in the next couple of scenes so you can rest and I was like whenever that they say that I'm like Yes, I love that. So in the studio that we're at there's like this corner of this studio where it's a kind of away from everything and there's like this long couch Right, yeah, and it's completely dark kind of too. So like I was eyeing it all day. I was like that's where I'm gonna take my nap Right, so I you know, I curl up and I fall asleep Completely sleep about 20 minutes later. I feel something in my ear Okay, and I'm like, you know You know trying to wax. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and then I kind of look up and there is a nine-year-old Background actress, mm-hmm. All right. She has her bony white finger Inside my ear did And I go what the fuck right and I look at her and then I look beyond her and there's how he mendele with a camera Yeah, shooting it. It's funny. It is it's funny. It's insane, but it's very funny. Right. Yeah, but it's not okay It's not okay, but it's very funny. So I kind of get up like a lady get the fuck out of here Right, that's not what you said to her what I say because you called me you said Who the fuck who are you? Yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean who the fuck are you and how he starts laughing? Yeah, yeah, and she turns to him to like validate that that he was his fault. Yeah, right and so I look at how he and I go dude Don't do that again, man. What the fuck are you doing? You know, man, just a bit right so they all leave. Yeah, I go back to sleep right then I feel right my hand Is wet Okay, it's in warm water, right and then I open my eyes how he mendele has my hand in a bucket of warm water Because he was trying to get me to pee. Yes in my sleep. Yes, and I went ape Shit, I went fucking nuclear on him. It's very funny. I'm sorry. Yeah, I go fuck out I'm never welcome you. I went snap because I was so tired, right and you know, I mean and I just had reached my breaking I blew up on howie To the point where in the next scene the director had to come up to us and go hey you guys okay because this isn't working All right, like like you guys have to amend this you send me a photo and you look fucking super pissed I was fucking live it. There's a photo of him with howie. I don't know if you can find it howie behind him He didn't post it. Oh He said he's got it in his phone. He sent me a picture of him and howie and he looks So funny and how he's like smiling and Bobby is so fucking mad. I'm so mad dude. It was hilarious. I'm sorry to laugh Yeah, it that last scene with him took forever and it the director keep coming on guys come on like fuck this guy And I'm let me just say this too. Okay. It's disappointing because as a kid growing up Bobby's world I was a huge and I still love him deeply. Yeah, but my huge howie Mendel fan I can't even believe that he calls me and stuff like it you know, sometimes you'll you know You've been fans of somebody and then now they call you. Yeah, and you're just in awe of it Like yeah, oh my god. I can't fucking believe. Yeah, so-and-so knows me. Yeah, it's shocking. It's shocking, right? You have all that in play, right? But then you know once that just goes out the window and now he's just some old dude fucking with it You're right and then and it got to the point where after we wrapped you know how they go if people don't know When if you're sure it's your last scene in the movie You know the director goes all right. That was Bobby's last scene wrap on Bobb and everyone claps. I fucking hate it I hit it to it right so they do it, but I grabbed my shit I don't say anything to anybody. I just had right off the thing get in my car and I fucking drive away the crew loved it They hated it. You know, I was really fucked But you weren't being mean to the crew yours and I was just so live it and then you know the repeated text So finally I ran into howie he goes, hey man. I owe you dinner. I go we're good We're good. I don't want to have dinner with you. No, I don't know. He's the old lady and she's gonna fucking Bro food at me in the middle of it. I mean, what would you have done? I mean, I'm much more temperamental than you that would have fucking Look, the first one I'd have been like ha ha ha. Yeah, then the second one I would have been like, okay I'm gonna fucking get you back bad I'm gonna get you back fucking bad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I probably would have smeared poop in his trailer Something fun like that, but you that right? I'm not oh, I would have loaded up you you got mad and left I would have loaded up. I would have been preparing during the day. How can I fucking yeah? You know, can I can I slash his tires? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Can I really take you to the next level? Yeah? That it shouldn't go to yeah, I went yeah, I mean, so I it wasn't an appropriate my feelings. No, it was it was disrespectful of how you've also You don't you know, there's an old rule old world rule. You know the old world rule Tell me you don't you don't pester a sleeping man I've heard that from my father. Do not you don't pester sleeping man. You don't pester a sleeping man Don't start fake wars with a fake person And more importantly more you don't pass the man. Yeah, you don't pester a sleeping man. Yeah, you're vulnerable when they're sleeping You don't do that. Yeah, you want to fuck with me. I better be awake. Oh, so it's not it's not I was fatigued You're tired from the show. Yeah, I was running on two hours of sleep. I was like fatigued. Yeah. Yeah, that a 70 year old man Is playing those games is so funny. That's why it's funny. That's why how he's a funny guy is a funny guy Because he will fuck with you, but this beef that that this beef that is being had right now with you and Paulie It's fake. You don't like it. It's not that I don't like it. It's just that because when I see him It's like did and we hug and all that stuff, right? You love him. I love him, but like You just want to start this thing. I've seen online. It's I don't know anything about it. I got a miss call from him though Probably this yeah, yeah, but he told me he was like, but we're not gonna bite You're not, but I was kind of willing to have fun with it, but yeah, I liked it. You're like fuck that. Don't you think this is the best route? It's the one that you want to take so I'll be on there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll ride with you. What's the route that you want to take? I want to see a little fake war between you guys, but it was with you two. Nah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah It was bad friends. It wasn't just me. I know, but he came up to me in the parking lot. Yeah, it's like I think we should do something me and Bobby. Yeah, mad at him. No, it's like You're not. Yeah, that's something that he would say mad that way. Yeah, mad at it. Yeah Yeah, no, I didn't I didn't know if he had talked to you about it. That's why I was curious. No, he was he's been Sweetie-sweetie-sweetie. Yeah, it's one of the sweetest guys. Yeah, yeah, but yeah, I'm not doing I'll do it. I'll do it with Howie Yeah, yeah, yeah, but he would this is what he wants though That's the thing with how he's mentality. You know, I mean he thrives on the shit. He does. Yeah, I'm not biting Bill Burr Billy Corgan thing was he was in love in every minute of that. Yeah, yeah, I mean I did too I thought that was fast. It was fascinating. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I love to see Bill Matt What he's the best is the best that and Billy Corgan. Yeah, yeah, well, he was sheepish in that well It was a little it was like I'm sorry. I didn't know it was a little unnerving. It's unnerving. Yeah, the whole thing was a little shit But yeah, how we were good We're good. We're good. Yeah, you've never been mad on a set or no one's ever fucked you like pissed you off I made so many people I had the last season of Dave. I had an unfortunate Moment it wasn't just me. Yeah, um the director I love this. - The director-- - Tell me, tell me. - I wouldn't mention her name or anything, but we were shooting a scene outside. We were out in the countryside and it was a crazy fucking morning. Like nothing was set up, right? It was kind of wack a do. And there's a lot of moving pieces, but it was also a huge wide for people at home that want to know, usually shoot a wide, and then you come in close. It depends on the director's style, but a lot of times you get this big fuck off wide, you get to warm up and then you get to the scene and then you get really down to the nitty gritty, you get really micro. Anyway, we're shooting this huge fucking wide and we're like walking through. And I'm like, we're walking through and then we go behind this bus that we're on. And then we kind of are chilling, but it's me and a few of the castmates and so we're kind of fucking through the scene because you're never gonna use that shot for more than a quarter of a tenth of a second. So then we go around the bus and we're all chatting. And she fucking loses it. - We can fucking hear you. This is the third fucking time you guys are talking through the fucking time. And you're not even like a bunch of children. - When she called us children, that's when I was like, "Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey." - Yeah. - I was like, "I love it, I love it." - I was like, "You're crazy out of pocket." - Yeah. - I'm a fucking adult male. You don't talk to anybody like that. She was losing her cool. And also because the episode was kind of not the way they wanted it to go. And I was like, "This isn't our fault." She was, "So then me, I'm not naming people and the two other castmates." We're like, "You got it, you got it." Then the rest of that scene was even harder for her because I was giving nothing. - You're pissed. - I was like, "Oh, you think that's annoying?" Wait till you see what we do in the next fuck. When you get tighter, just wait. - Wow. - We'll do 30 of 'em now. - Wow. - You treat me like a fucking kid. That's crazy. I'm a grown-up. Just be like, "Hey, you guys, we can hear you." She lost her fucking cool. And subsequently, you know, "I haven't heard from her in a while." I don't think she's getting along with her. (laughing) - Yeah. - She lost her cool. - And the whole crew was like, "What the fuck was that?" Like the whole crew was like, because what you do is you bring down the energy of the thing. It was like, "Why are you doing that?" Then you're, 'cause all the crew guys are like, you know, like the sound guy was like, "Yeah." - Like what's that about? - Yeah. - Then everyone's in a weird mood. Like, "Why are you being that way?" You're just blowing up on people because you're upset about something. So, but can you do what Daniel Day Kim does? - Be Asian. - No, no, no, no. Daniel Day Kim told me about. He was on a set once where the director was the first day and goes, "Hey, man, you're 30 minutes late." - Screams at him. - Yeah. - But he wasn't late. - He was on time. - Yeah. So Daniel, hold him aside and you go, "Hey, man, don't talk to me like that." - I love that. - Yeah. "Why can't we do that?" - I'm not Daniel Day Kim. - Oh, that's right. - Yeah. - Oh, that's right. - Yeah, you can, though. - No. - What? What's going on here? What's that, dude? - I got the order for you. (laughs) - What are you doing? - Damn, dude, you ordered that, man. - Yeah. - Take a seat. - You want to sit down or? - Oh, yeah, for sure. Hey, man. - I have a idea for you, Bob. If you want to. - Oh, where are Bob now? Shopify! We have an online business here at PatFriends. We only use the best. 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In a way that's easy to digest, you can even automatically create custom budgets based on your past spending. - Best part is rocket money, what they're gonna do is they try to negotiate the bills for you. So they want to lower those bills. Now app, it'll automatically scan these bills, find opportunities to save and it goes to work to get those better deals done for you. You don't got to talk to customer service anymore. That's gone, they'll do it for you. So rocket money has saved users over $2.5 billion, including over 880 million and cancel subscriptions along their 10 million members saved up to $740 a year when they use all of the apps premium features. - Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with rocket money, go to rocketmoney.com/badfriends today. - That's rocketmoney.com/badfriends, rocketmoney.com/badfriends. - Bad friends. - That's your last name. - Mr. Bob. - That's Bobby Lee. - Bobby Lee, yeah. - Yeah, that's what your name? - Get comfortable. - Thanks. - What's your name? - Zach Townsend. - You're a great comment. - What's the idea? - What's going on here? - He's a great comment. I got a business idea for you guys though. - Okay. - Okay. - Come on, picture to you. - Yeah. - This is gonna get me out of the hole. - Okay. - Chat EBT. (laughs) - Okay. - I love it. - Before you, yeah, yeah, yeah. - It's like a chat BbD. - It's not what you're probably thinking. - Yeah, yeah. - This is, I know exactly what it is. It's a chat GBT for black people. (laughs) - Yeah. - Yeah. - How does that work? - So basically you like ask. - Well, it doesn't work. - Yeah, it doesn't. - It could be working, that's why Snap got taken away. - It's not working right now. - Yeah. - But basically you ask it a question. (laughs) - And then it just says, oh, hell no. (laughs) - Oh, I see. - Yeah. - So what do you think? - Well, it's a really good idea. - That's a great idea. - Is it AI or? - Alan Iverson, yeah. (laughs) - Yeah, Alan Iverson. - Yeah, that's it. - Is Alan Iverson. - Oh wow, you got him. - Yeah, we got him. - I deal with him. I'll get going. - We got him tomorrow. - Alan Iverson. - You want a piece of pizza? It looks like you got a lot there. - Yeah. - 20 boxes maybe? - It's probably blocking your face. - Can I just put it off to the side? - Yeah, yeah. - This is my favorite part. I knew he was gonna look at one right away. (laughs) Yeah, well, there's more in there. There's different kinds. - I like this kind of. - I have some pepperoni, if you want some. - I've seen that movie before. I'm not fighting. (laughs) Ladies and gentlemen, bad friends family, bad friends family. This is our good friends, Zach Townsend, great comedian. - Great friend up. - Who opened for me for a little while. - What happened? - Wait, yeah, wait, what happened? - He started closing. - Oh, you're a headliner. - He has a headliner. - Yeah. - Well. - Can't open anymore when you're closing. - Yeah. - But I mean, you know your people are gonna run those stores, right? You can't close it if it's open. - Yeah, exactly. - Yeah. - Zach is a phenomenal comic Nashville. Although-- - It is a good excuse if you don't want somebody to open for you. You pull them inside for a little later now. - Yeah, this is the first time I'm here. I thought I was still open. (laughs) - This pizza thing was a bit, but I think this might have to go-- - Yeah, I have to go. (laughs) - Well, I figured you're gonna go hungry for a little while. So I was like, to give that man some pizzas. - Fuck. Who opens for you now? - Anybody but Zach? - Yeah, yeah, okay. I heard Kat Bird got a little thing from me. - Kat Bird, we did take down. - Kat Bird was us. - Yeah, we did. - Oh, you did Bray last weekend? - Idiot. - Yeah, we did. - Oh, yeah. - Yeah, we did Bray and I took Kat Bird and Zach. - And Zach came, Zach. - Oh, I was Kat. - Zach, yeah, Zach. - Yeah, Zach. - ZAC. - What? - ZAC. - Yeah, Zach. - I gotta change your contact on my phone. Zach and Kat went down. Then Devantre Coleman comes with me when he can. When he's not, you know, blowing up this guy. - Yeah. - This guy just came from telling what you just did. - I just did. - Come on, tell it to him the way you told me. - I just did, no, I just did. - I just did comics unleashed. (laughing) - Wow, I wanna work a domino. (laughing) - Wow, how was Byron? - He's great. - Comic Unleashed for people that don't know. It's a comedic institution. It's been around for, it's gotta be 20 years. I mean, right? How long has it been on TV? - All for a while. - Ever. - Yeah. - Yeah. And they look it up how long has it been on. But Byron Allen has been running this show. It's a round table of comics on couches. And they, you know, you pitch your jokes and you get to run your bits. - Mm-hmm. - It's been on for 19 years. I was right there. - Who was on it with you today? - It was Guy Torrey from American history. - I love Guy so much. - He's great. - He's an old friend of mine. - Good girl. - I actually opened for him a couple times in Nashville. - So maybe you can open for him again 'cause I'm done with you. (laughing) - Who else? - And then two other people I don't remember their names. But they were nice. They'll be real. They know they're nice. - You don't know the names, really? - I really don't know that. One of them was like Lori something. Then the other guy was, he had Gray hair. I remember that. - Oh, Gray hair. - Gray hair. - Yeah, Gray hair. Wait, didn't Kat film with you? Wasn't she gonna film? - We all did different ones. But she's filming today, I'm pretty sure. - Those guys, you know, they do, did you ever do comics unleashed? - I've been asked. - I never did it. I can't believe you. - We were popped in. - Bob didn't have enough kids. - We're the only headliners that I've never done. - I didn't have enough, what? - I was just joking. - The look of anger with a little bit of pizza on it. I don't give a shit. He's not my name. That hit me so hard. Yeah, like it's a destroyer of friends. Well, now why don't you go on comics and at least improve them wrong, right? You could prove him. Good one. Why didn't you do it? I Didn't feel that's not a format for me Me either me either if I'm being honest There was never a point in my career that I thought I was gonna be good on that show Yeah, that's I never did late. I only did Conan Conan was the only one I wanted to do because I loved Conan and I always wanted to do Letterman, but by the time I had the balls put together Letterman was gone and So Conan was my hero. I wanted to Conan. I got on Conan and they were like, why don't you want to do other late night? I was like how much more shit are you gonna fucking open? How much more fucking shit are you gonna open? We have one more We do have one more. Let's hear it Yeah, thank you right in the mic God these guys this is how unprofessional the show is they don't know to turn their mic down when they're doing some dumb shit like that But they'll do that for you. He'll come running like a little pipsqueak that he is get go get down He's the best. He is my favorite. No, but I only wanted to do Conan and then when they asked do the other ones I thought I'm gonna bomb on that show. Did you bomb? Oh, yeah, I yeah, I had a hard I was telling my cone outside I did like three black joke. I did like three black. I'm surprised even let me do them do him here Let me hear him. Well, give me the premise. I can do I know because you know, yeah, I did well the one that you know that you like The we're the only ones who know how to whisper. Oh, yeah Yeah, and then they then him and Guy Tory were like I think they're not I don't think they like got offended But they were like I made a joke about like I said I have a lot of black friends you could tell by my shoes and after the joke They're like man you really got that a black people friend shoes, you know, yeah They umpt on me. They aren't they aren't they aren't they aren't me huh? Yeah, they're like no white guy that wears Air Force ones Every white guy that wears Air Force ones is friends with black people It's it's almost a requirement when you buy them at foot locker. They're like let me see you phone You got to show them how many black friends you have and your phone's dead And you're like I cannot charge my phone. They're like you definitely What is that cricket you good? Why did you do it? Because I'm just trying to say yes to a lot of things. Oh, that's good. Yeah Yeah, Zach is a great comic and he needs more credits and the internet now is fucking flooded with a billion comics doing Every clip and then he needs to fucking be a part of the system like everything. Yeah, this is a credit. Right. It's a huge credit We're gonna thank you out of those I think no no Yeah, fancy. Oh bits. I Was kid. I'm a huge fan. Yeah, yeah Wait, give me give me the other jokes you told do it just so we can hear him. Oh, I did I said one about like I think true crime like you know because it has to be clean too So it can't be as good as but I said like, you know I think white crimes get investigated a little bit harder than black crimes You know just based off the names the name these things like a white woman will go missing and No, they'll call it like the 12-year disappearance of Sarah and like a black. I get murdered and then just like the first 48 hours That's a great they wrap it up quick. Yeah, yeah, he liked that one Byron liked that one. Yeah, yeah, but yeah, I he didn't like the I said I talked to him one of my black friends was telling me That was chat. EBT. I'm like this is all I'm just doing I'm like nick the polo now. Yeah, do it Nick I said I have a lot of black friends if you can't tell about my black friend told me the other day He said I don't trust white people because they're always telling secrets and I was like I don't agree with that statement at all You know, I just think we're the only race that knows how to whisper Fantastic Joe and they push back on that. No, I mean he just kind of like they were kind of going after my shoes And it felt like maybe that one I go did you fire back at all a little bit. Yeah, I said it Said the end work. No, no, no, no, I said stop stop guy. You nervous. Oh A little bit. It's not as it's not it wasn't as nerve is says I thought I was gonna be Yeah, well no because you I mean at some point you know you got the if you have all the weapons You're like well, I'm just gonna swing and then hopefully they hit and it's a live audience. Yeah, yeah And they're alive. I don't know. Yeah, I was like looking at someone like these some of these people might be AI for real like they're Probably a lot of tweakers the reason why don't like these types of shows is is that it's so you know, it's not organic, right? It's like you mean what you what are you gonna say so I can lead up to it so it's the conversation is so fake But if that's every prompt on late night they do the same thing they prompt you. Well, that's why I've never done them I get I mean yeah, I just can't do it. Right. It's a set it's an old it's an old format Yeah, but it's a cart Carson did it. It was the way that fucking Carson set up his show too I mean, there was way more improv back then, but also there's a lot of dead air if you watch old Carson There's an awful lot of fucking dead air wouldn't fly today. Yeah, like, you know, there's moments of gaps where you're like Oh, this is like valuable TV time. Yeah, but they need the prompts to keep the thing moving. I mean Byron Allen This guy talk about proving all those conspiracy theories wrong. He bought the weather, right? Yeah Yeah, the J's can yeah, the J's control it, but he bought it. Yeah They must have some sort of mutual agreement. Yeah, he distributes the J's right the J's own it, but he distributes it Wow, okay, Byron next week it's been rain It's my company I can make it rain if I want to He acquired the weather champ Byron Allen bought the weather channel a $300 million deal in 2018 Wow, and by the way, this guy's got $300 million to buy the fucking weather channel He paid this guy like 48 dollars to go on TV today. Wow What did they give you for those what did they give you for those live show? There's a couple hundred bucks It wasn't a thousand, but it wasn't it wasn't 500 even my it were at my house. Even my wife is like 200 hours You can't they that's what they give you. I was like TV's dead. Yeah, they're killing everyone. They're not given anyone any money I'm not even sure what it is I don't even comics unleash my beat on the weather channel I don't even know they didn't tell me like what network it's gonna It runs side by side with a fucking a doppelgab a doppler alert. That's nice though That's nice that you got that under your belt. That's first literal TV credit first literal TV credit. Yeah, give it up for the boy Come on Bobby still fuming from the bits. Oh, no Just tell him you are tell him you hate it. Yeah, I love it. No, I always try to hit me whenever I know you no I'll give you gentle touches. Yeah, I'm a pit on the pee on the peep. No, the other night when I saw you at the store I did side side gentle touches on your side. No. Yeah, but you're always I don't your mind You think that I'm gonna do something nefarious. I think you're really strong. Yeah, I am very strong. I know. Yeah, that's why I don't like he's got that Strength Yeah, I got that strength. Yeah Yeah, but have we always won the extra chromosome? I Will it repeat all of you? We to one and then fight The Chronicles the peanut butter fracking Books the how'd you get the shout on my man my management Facebook? Answer and add on fucking Facebook. They just put you on that thing. Yeah, you got bits We should do it what we should do it together. There's no Why I don't want to do it. It would be fun. We can make the request. It would have to be just me you and Byron And they would a hunter. Why would they not do that? They'd be so funny. That would be awesome You're doing like family feud style and get like two more like bad friend of jace and just do all four of you I think that'd be fun. Yeah, you can do all you guys don't bring up family feud. We lost a flavorful. Yeah So this day if you if you were asked to do family feud right we did it. No, but it was my family. Oh that well Rub it in so no, but no, but they they're gonna ask you Santino right would I be a part of your five? No You know mad at me if I wasn't the boss. He wants to win Well, you didn't get many answers right. I'm going for skill. Yeah tactics who would be on your family? Dude imagine who would they put me up against by the way? They put you up against flavor flame. So they're doing like who they That's right. What is it about they're like flame. I'm Asian flavor. Flav you they're in the meeting room They're like all right, check it out. Yeah. Yeah, who's Bobby Lee's perfect counterpart? Who's like who's like a black Yeah, like flavor play. Yeah, who would I have as my family? It would be me you my sister My wife my mom or my dad wouldn't want to do it. Maybe my dad my sister definitely me you my sister. Yeah um Who should be really good see I'd be tactical you weren't tactical What do you mean? I chose the wrong person Esther uh Me you my sister Raul my landscaper. That'd be funny. He's fucking amazing. That'd be really funny. That'd be so funny Raul and um Brian Holtzman Just because I feel like him and Steve would have a battle. Yeah, yeah Holtzman would be funny and hilarious. Yeah, yeah. I'd be so funny to watch him scream at Steve Harvey I mean they would fucking hate each other. That's like two opposite energies. Yeah. I would next time I do it If I ever do it I would I would choose the team that would win Yeah, we will we'll get a little team together. Oh no, they're never gonna ask me. I'm with you. I'm your plus one You know want me. They don't want me. Please ask them because I need redemption. I'd rather go on. I'd rather go on wheel of fortune. Oh, I'll be bad at that game. Well, you guessed letters. I'm not gonna. Fucking easiest game. It's not jeopardy. Yeah. Zach's got one more day here in Los Angeles. We sent him around. We did almost everything with the boy. Yeah. And then he goes back to Nashville to his girlfriend, who we loves. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Just got him. Just got himself a new house. Yeah, it's incredible. Thanks, Bob. Amazing. You did it. You helped. Oh, yeah. I extorted money from you. I'm the Mexican gangster. Oh, I see. Yeah. You better buy my opener or fucking house. Hey, and your girlfriend lives with you. Yeah. Yeah. I would hope so. They bought a house together. She's paying for some of the mortgage. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's why we're doing it. This is a light. So, this is a life partner. Yeah. Probably. Yeah. I'll see. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, how long have you been doing? Well, she finds out what I did in my comics and leash trailer. Yeah. But how long? I mean, how long have you been dating her for like three, three years? Okay. That's a good enough time. Yeah. She's red. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She's very good looking. She's cool. She's smart. She's way better than Zach. It's one of those things where it's annoying when you're like, oh, the partner is more superior. But and then you sometimes wonder, is he holding her hostage? Yeah. He's Shrekken. You're Shrekken? Yeah, you're Shrekken hard. A new slang. A new slang term for the dating trend of intentionally dating someone you consider to be less attractive than yourself. I hope they'll treat you better. Yeah. That's pretty spot on. That's actually like, that's almost like whoever made this nose me and my girlfriend. So what's your dream here? What do you want out of this business? I want to, I want him out of this. Yeah. What is it? I just to be successful as you guys. Really? Yeah. Never. Yeah, I should for the moon, right? Anything. Was that a shot? He does it all the time. Let me tell you something, pal. We have your replacement. We casted him the fans answered. He was a hit. He was a hit. He was a man. Was he not a hit? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. And he's a hit and you're a what? What? You're a lump. A miss a miss. Yeah. Yeah. No, you're a head. I love you. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. It goes bump into that karate ghost coming this fall. Do we know when it comes out? No, I don't know. Do karate ghost release date? Wait, what is this? He's in a movie called karate ghost. It's going to be awesome January 31st, 2023. It already came out. You filmed it after it came out. That's how good the movie came out. Was there another karate ghost? How? How on fucking Earth? Is there more than one of them? Well, we did the remake. That's when you're in with Balushi set in a town ruled by an absurd karate law. The film watches a lonely teen form an unlikely bomb with the ghost of his late father's favorite action hero. Yeah. Are you you're just a local? You're not one of it. Are you the ghost? No, no, I play a sensei. And that's why. Yeah, I know. And that's why the question you just asked me five minutes ago. Yeah. Who is it? Daniel Day Kim? Yeah. That's why we are not Daniel Day Kim. I know. Because you played a sensei. I know. And I'm in the magic movie for four heartbeats. Yeah. They make me disappear. Yeah. Zach, close out the show by saying thanks for being a bad friend into your camera. Thanks for being a bad friend, everybody. That was terrible. Hey, everybody, thanks for being a bad friend.