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Good evening, gentle listeners or watchers,
and welcome to Distractible, this episode.
Booming Bob couldn't fly, gets a GoPro, tastes ass,
and goes into the long and short of things.
Weirdling Wade looms in limos, flips himself off,
gets hammered, then abuses red hot and duct tape.
Modest Mark talks bathroom magic, advising Apple,
capturing crap coverage, and blasting bamboo.
From hyping hairlessness to expunging,
waging Wade.
It's time for Doing Too Much.
Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.
Hello and welcome back to another episode of Distractible.
The most hype, the most handsome, the most hairless podcast you're gonna find anywhere online.
I was trying to, I could be handsome.
Or I could be.
Wait, do I have to be hairless?
Pretty much, yeah.
I guarantee I have more hair than you on every part of my body that has hair.
Plus, I have hair where you don't.
The esophagus?
I guess if we're counting body hair, I am quite a hairless individual.
Markiplier up top, mole rat below.
Why did I introduce this podcast that way?
Couldn't fucking tell ya.
Anyway, Wade's bald, welcome to Distractible.
This is the show where, uh, the points are like apples to your dog.
They matter as much as you think they do.
But your doctor doesn't really give a shit if you eat apples.
You still have to go see him.
I tried that.
I told my doctor I was eating like three apples a day.
Still made me come in.
Didn't matter.
Said I needed. Medicine.
Anyway, if you've never seen the show before, this is a great warm-up for what you can expect for the entire time.
It's an improvised show.
I have a topic.
We might not even get to it.
It really depends how things go today.
We poured our hearts out last time.
So I'm sure we'll get to the- the game today.
I'm sure it'll be fine.
Uh, but I'm the host, Bob, because I won the last one.
And I only am Bob because I won.
If I had lost, I'd be somebody else.
I'm joined, as always, by my two competitors/co-hosts, Mark and Wade.
Hello!
Hey, hey, hey!
It feels like it's been, like, a month and a half to me.
The amount of shit that happened since the last time we were here doing this, which was only one week ago, is crazy to me.
Do you guys know that-
Five hours after we hung up the last recording session, I was doubled over a toilet, vomiting so hard that I was pulling muscles on my ribs.
No, I thought you were on a plane.
I kind of suspected that.
Actually, yeah, Mark didn't know that, 'cause we were doing- yeah.
No, I didn't- I didn't go!
Didn't end up going to England.
Was supposed to go to England, didn't happen.
Crazy.
Wait, neither one of you made it to England?
Nobody made it to England.
No one made it.
Is anyone in England?
England, are you there?
It wasn't just us.
Nobody could go to England.
Because their whole government system to get travel visas exploded?
I don't know. I don't know what happened. It just stopped existing for a while.
But you were sick, which is different than the problem I was having.
I haven't been that sick in such a long time.
Last time, I was like, "Oh, James was sick. It was so bad."
I don't even care if he was sick anymore. God, I was sick. It's awful.
Me.
If you don't laugh, it's really awkward, guys.
Sam, take a laugh from another episode and put it here.
*laughs*
I just have, uh, it's been a hell of a week. How are you guys doing?
Well, to echo on that, I also was supposed to be in- I've got a lot of small talk to talk about.
It was also one of the most eventful weeks of my entire existence.
Um, I think all three of us could probably agree this past week has been loaded with all kinds of incredible, horrifying things happening.
Mine was pretty on par with normal.
*laughs*
So, um, I don't know if we all three could agree, but it sounds like you two really.
I know one thing that happened to all three of us that we can all be excited about.
*singing*
We all bought it!
Wait, what? Wait, is that the ILM one?
No. It's a 3D printed- *sniff*
No, wait, no, and you- I know you bought- they sent this to me with a handwritten note that said, "Hey, Distractible, thanks so much for being so hyped up about GoPro and our new products."
And we thought we'd send you guys-
They sent us one camera and by us they meant you?
I assumed they sent it to each of us, like we- I am not Distractible, the- it was we are- the three of us are Distractible.
Well, not anymore, apparently you are Mr. Distractible.
'Cause I knew Mark had bought one, so I thought like, "Oh, well, he's not gonna be, you know, he's not gonna be like hyped as I am about that."
But yeah, they- they sent the- and they sent the- the ri- the cage that goes with it.
It's pretty. nothing. You got- nevermind.
I mean, nothing happened to all three of us this week. We all had very different experiences.
Did they actually? Did they actually?
Yes. Honest to God.
A package showed up, and it was addressed to Distractible, and I was like, "Huh, that's weird, 'cause we haven't had any sponsors lately."
Previously, when we had lots of sponsors on the show, we would occasionally just get paid.
Boxes that were like, "Here's a year's supply of gummies for some reason. You're gonna do a sponsorship for th-"
But this, it was- it was a very nice note that was like, "Ah, you- you guys are such good fans. We love you, Distractible.
Here's a- here's the new- here's that camera you were talking about so much. Go shoot your movies with it."
Do they think they're funny? Do they think they're funny?
I think they're funny. I was sad until I realized Mark didn't get one, too. Now I feel a lot better.
Do they- I have one. I have actually multiple, 'cause I've bought multiple.
I have multiple of them. If Wade didn't- if Wade didn't get one, I'm happier.
I didn't get one, so you can be happier.
I didn't realize I was so import- I didn't realize I was the figurehead of this show.
I represent all of Distractible.
Look, you know- you- Mark, I'm sure that they meant to send it to you, and there was just some mix-up, 'cause they were like,
"Oh, Mark's a big Cincinnati guy. He must be one of- he must be the Cincinnati address, and-"
We all live in the same house.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I mean, it's-
Mean house.
It's gotta be an honest mistake, right?
'Cause you- you talked to somebody, I thought, or-
I have been. I have been. You know, I- I have been.
Well, they definitely don't have Mark's address from the purchase he actually made through them to get one, so yeah, odds are-
I'm not even-
Very easy mistake.
I'm not even completely clear how they got my address. I've never worked with GoPro ever, directly.
They work in tech. They have all of our addresses. They know us.
I just asked ChatGPT, like, "Where does Bob live?" and-
"Where does Distractible live?" and your address came up.
I bet yours is in the mail. I mean, this came almost a week ago, but-
Like, I think that while I was sick the day after we recorded last, I think this showed up, so it's been here for a while.
I've been using it for, um, trains. James- James likes me to film his trains, you know, so that's pretty important.
Mark's, like, on the edge of a volcano, like, "Man, I really hope I can film this with my new camera."
Bob's like, "I have this little, uh, Fisher-Price train set."
"It's a Brio train. It's a Brio train with custom 3D printed accessories. Okay, just calm down."
I'm just- I'm just going to see if there's a Distractible, uh, code that works on the site, 'cause that would be fucking funny.
Mark is going into ChatGPT to change the Distractible address.
Well, you've been using it, so I can- I can tell you, you were right on, Mark.
It's a great camera. Probably the nicest camera I actually own. Well, it's old, but I do have a Sony a7.
Uh, R2. So that's probably- but that's not fair, because this is, like, one- one tenth the size of that thing.
I will say, uh, uh, it's very good. Maybe not that good. Maybe it's not that good.
Why did your voice crack during that? Are you okay?
Shut the fuck up, Luke. I'm doing an anti-pitch now.
I- I actually- okay, I was at Apple, um, for the event, uh, and I- I felt afraid to pull this out of my pocket.
Because, you know, them and their phones, they're all, like, you know, talking- I was talking to the, um, the-
This is a whole other- I'm jumping into the middle of my "I went to Apple" small talk portion of this, but I was talking to the-
Were you gonna get another MS Paint saga?
No, it was the lead photo esthetician.
Esthetician?
Aesthetic person. The lead pho- the person who's in charge of defining the aesthetics of photos.
Uh, and so, I- I was talking to them about, like, it was like, "Oh, yeah, what do you use?"
It was like, "Oh, in the movie, you know, we use Reds for my main YouTube. We got, like, an A7S3, uh, and I have a Nikon ZR, and then I have a GoPro."
And then they're like, "How- how do you- how do you match all your stuff?"
I go, when do you use your phone?
And I'm like, I use my phone.
I use my phone.
I use it.
But they all have to say, like,
the iPhone 17 Pro Max.
I legitimately had a great time at the Apple trip,
but I didn't mean to do it.
But I was like, yeah, I use my phone.
And I pulled this out.
And then I pulled out this monstrosity next to it.
I was like, and then I got this in my other pocket.
I was like, what is that?
And I was like, oh, I 3D printed this little macro thing.
It was made by. What kind of camera do you keep in your front pocket?
And I could just see, like, the color drain from her face.
Oh, God.
I'm just like, oh, no, hold on, wait.
Hey, look, episodes of,
an episode of this podcast was filmed on iPhone's,
iPhone, Mark's iPhone.
Can I tell you why I was invited?
Well, we now know why you won't be invited back,
but yeah, sure.
No, no, I was.
I swear.
I have to shout out the subreddit home lab
because legitimately the reason I was invited
is because Apple heard that I had 54 Mac studios
in my bathroom as a render for me.
And they legitimately told me,
yeah, no one's ever done that before.
And so I got an invite.
I got to talk.
I shook hands.
I shook hands with Tim Cook himself.
Mr. Tim Apple.
I showed him the picture of my bathroom and he said,
that makes my heart sing.
And I legitimately was like, that is the most,
I almost wept.
I was just like, oh my God.
It's so nice.
Oh my God.
I just put it in a bathroom.
I met John Ternus.
I shook hands with him.
I showed him the picture of it and he went, wow.
Wow.
Cool.
Cool.
Cool.
Cool.
Cool.
Mark's like, I went to Apple because I had a bunch
of computers in my bathroom.
Yeah.
That is actually the reason.
Did you tell them about your Capri Sun hack?
You know, it didn't come up.
It didn't come up.
Did you tell them the next, they should make it an adapter.
So that's like a Capri Sun holder heat sink situation.
Mark pulls out his phone.
He pulls out his GoPro.
He pulls out a Capri Sun.
He's like, guys, I have the next big thing for you.
I think that BTUs are announced.
This is an outdated way to measure thermal capacity.
I think it should be Capri Suns.
You know, I had a whole thing where I was going to say like, it was such a wonderful
experience, which it was, I'm not saying I wasn't going to say, oh fuck, oh God, I was
going to lie and say it was a great time.
It was such a wonderful experience.
I, the, the entire architecture of the, the Apple one campus is mind blowing.
It looks fake.
Like it looks like a, like a weird VR background when they do.
Cause they do walk and talks in front of it and stuff.
And I'm always kind of like, is that.
Is that really the thing?
Or is that like a weird rendered?
Cause that looks ridiculous.
It does.
It looks insane.
It's real.
It's legitimate.
It's every single inch of it has like this polish to it and, and it's every like there's
so much glass.
I don't know how they made all the windows.
I don't know how they did it.
They have the largest moving glass doors in the world because, and it takes seven minutes
for them to open and they calculate it specifically of when they can maximize.
The temperature exchange.
And it's, it's, it's a Marvel of engineering that, that, that building is actually legitimately
incredible.
Um, yeah.
And I said to them like, oh, I get it.
Like it's, you want your employees to be inspired, but aren't you worried that they'll just kind
of like wander in the park and never come back because the entire interior courtyard
is like 80 acres of just like lovely landscaping with trees and gardens and fruit on art.
There's orchards there that they use to, to, to make jam for their own campus.
Cafeterias.
And it's like, is it all apple jam?
No, they have apples, they have fig, but that's, that's funny.
That's funny right there.
It's it legitimately.
It's great.
So I, I, I'm really painting it in a bad light.
My trip was wonderful.
Yeah.
The missing employees was a little concerning of people that wandered into the park and
never returned.
Well, that's at night.
If they hear, see pieces of paper on trees and then go out into the woods and hear a
thumping in the background, you know, you know, you shouldn't go out there then and
there.
But I felt afraid because I kept, I didn't, you know, I didn't film with my iPhone.
I don't know if you were in like a separate thing, but isn't everyone there filming with
like their big, their camera cameras.
It's not like every all cause like, uh, and KBHD goes and stuff and they, he has some
fucking eight K cinema thing.
It's a really big iPhone with like so many attachments is like, yeah, this is an iPhone
17 pro max.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah.
I wasn't with them.
I was in a separate group.
I was in the red carpet.
No, no.
It was special.
No, it was good.
I was special.
When you were done, did you, did you call, did you call the guy who got you hooked up
and be like, ah, yeah, I almost went to the main part.
I was somewhere else.
And he's like, ah, it would've been great if you would've been to the, ah, did you take
any pictures?
No.
You wouldn't get your camera out.
Oh, okay.
Good.
Good.
Okay.
Good.
Good.
Good.
Good.
I was in the special group.
I was.
Sure, buddy.
It was so special.
I had such a good time.
They showed you the missing person area.
They showed you their phones.
They showed you some apples and other fruits.
They gave you a Capri Sun.
They looked at your photo.
Like that's a good photo.
That home lab Reddit post is so good though.
Like I, I found that organically.
I mean, I'm connected to a bunch of you shit.
So it wasn't that organically.
But it's the discussion on that original post on Reddit was very funny because there were
so many people who didn't understand the context at all.
And we're like, why the fuck would you need any of this?
Like, what is this for?
It was really cool to talk to them about why I did this.
It was really cool to talk to them about why I did that.
many people who didn't understand the context at all and were like why the fuck would you need any
of this like yeah yeah what is this for it was really cool to talk to them about why i did the
max food because number one it's in a bathroom so it's like i can only put so many air conditioners
in there before the air conditioner insulation guy will report me to somebody uh and i i feel
like there was an aha moment with that and i it was so cool i was talking i was in this uh group
with someone from ilm which is a lucasfilm uh who does a lot of vfx for all the biggest movies you
could imagine and so i was able to talk about houdini with this guy because like that was one
of his specialties is like he i mean he uses all of the softwares but he also knows houdini and
has used it for a long time and talking about like yeah i was using for like tops and it was perfect
for the artists to be able to kick out little
you
to all the studios um and a lot of people think it was overkill but it's not overkill right now
because right now there's like a run on max studios and the price of them is actually more
than i originally paid for them so it's like i could i could turn a profit on just the thing
it's like so that was actually part of it because i knew used max studio location my bathroom
did you sold as is not poopy
bathroom pickup only
only i will be on toilet when you arrive don't look here's a photo of the max studios there's
just an arrow pointing to each one in that one photo like here's the one you're getting
yeah one listing just each one's yeah that's pretty funny so it was but i i was able to talk
to you know some people at apple specifically about that because they were very curious because
it was like a niche use case and they really like to hear about niche use cases and so i didn't
mention glabra salts at all that was probably good i mentioned how i stacked them like upside
down like that and i okay i might have embarrassed i referenced how when i was at perkins as a kid i
would take the little creamer cups and stack them lid to lid that i would kill for perkins
right now lid to bottom bottom to lid like that and i told them like if you put a thermal sheet
in between them because it's a big block of aluminum my theory was they could kind of share
with each other because they're a big thermal block and kind of if one's running and the other's
not it can act as a heat sink and at worst they could you know fit together better and you know
they were really they actually listened to me so ha take that everyone at home lab i went to apple
i have an apple shirt i met the owner of apple and i told him how i used to stack coffee creamers
that is not and then he looked at a picture on my phone and said wow it's a misrepresentation of my
story just like that i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know how i'm supposed to do it
just the whole time it's feral feral mid episode of distractible mark wandering around be like
you know coffee creamers right you've seen coffee creamers
you can stack them i thought laptops are like coffee creamers
don't even a laptop you just get the capri sun and you put in the middle of them
he doesn't know what he's saying don't listen to him actually if i probably did use used capri sun
packets in between them that would have been even funnier like a stack one drink a capri sun put it
down stack one other you wait till you smash it in the middle and you really compressed it out of
there you just i don't drink through the straw i slam it between two mac studios and open my mouth
that's why it's in the bathroom you stacked them in the tub and then you just
and the tub collects the capri suns and then you have like a whole tub of capri suns
this is end game markiplier behavior is just like i don't know what to do with all my movie money let
me just slam it you guys zoom in on the picture you'll see all the straws still
in the wrapper on the floor of the bathroom i i hope
at worst they got a good laugh out of me showing them the picture but you know i think when you
know when tim cook retires uh he looks back on his long history at apple and remembers my picture
his last words he's like don't let markiplier own this company
why would he say that because the last thing he thinks of is that picture
your takeaway is that tim cook hates mark now and is dying soon
the hell that's a rumor i guess we could start don't i'm never gonna be invited again
you ruin all of my sponsorships forever and forever whoops well that sounds fun and i
honestly uh not that i have any reason to go to any of those but i am pretty jealous because
that that's just one of those things where it's like i just would like to go see
you know like the the apple campus seems cool the event seems super cool the it's like an
experience of like you know like you know like you know like you know like you know
i mean they have tons of people there but it's pretty exclusive you get like a cool like swag
bag and they give you like it's just all kinds of really cool stuff that's very fun very jealous
it's it's awesome like no joke whatever you think about the company it that if you were to work
anywhere i'd be like man i could quit youtube and work here this is fucking awesome this would be
amazing you could be their bathroom guy i'll be the bathroom guy oh mark we're having some issue
in this bathroom
it seems like all the toilets have been ripped out and replaced with capri sun dispensers just
keep building servers in their bathrooms i don't know what you're being these guys you guys aren't
doing it right uh why don't we get a po for what's listed as 600 bathroom iphones like oh i'm working
on something uh it's you know dispersed computing it's complicated i'll let you guys know how it
works out don't go in the bathroom on the east wing for a while well it's a donut so how to
don't go in the bathroom on the left
don't uh how would how do you describe which way a donut is one one through eight it's like they
have numbers sections one through eight and everything inside it is sub numbered yeah
whatever you do stay out of the jelly stay out of the jelly i could go for it i want perkins i want
a donut i want all this stuff is perkins still in business yeah they still exist i can't think of
the closest one to where we live but i've i know i've seen one pretty recently everyone out there
go to a perkins right now let's go support perkins to keep them around uh there's one in fairfield
there's one in uh in cincinnati it says cincinnati i know that place great episode i'm gonna go get
some perkins well you didn't even do your small talk mark had a couple that's right mark had a
couple thing or did you do small talk i haven't even i haven't even finished my small talk i've
got mark's not even done shut up wade oh no go please oh no man how can i live up to it mark's
life is so fascinating i want to hear about it i went to gear expo oh sorry cine gear expo i don't
know why i call it gear expo oh skinny gear expo oh skinny gear expo oh skinny gear expo oh skinny
gear yeah skinny gear it's for skinny guys it's like uh nab and it's for you know cinema
equipment manufacturers it's it was really cool it was on the universal lot and i don't i guess
they didn't anticipate anyone would be driving a truck into this um because i go into the parking
garage and i get there and i see a bar that says six six and if i look up what the height of of
an f-150 lightning is it's probably just about six six six
five so there's no bump yeah i hope that's a really accurate and consistent six six so i get
in there and my antenna goes off of the bar and i'm me and sam sam is actually in the truck with
me he was on this journey so he could attach we're looking up at the sunroof watching this
pillar pass within like a hair's breadth and i'm like hope this road is perfectly smooth
and doesn't bump us up at all
because it was like that and then we get in there and no one stops us until we're already in it's
like oh whoa as we're about to go through so i'm like i figured as much so i'm doing a 20 point
like austin powers turn and i drive out i get to the outside i'm just like hey you have any
parking for like big vehicles i'm a big vehicle right here and they're like oh no no sorry you'll
have to go across the street and i'm like okay that's fine i i have to make a right out here
and then make a u-turn up ahead but i see another sign
that's like cinegear parking right here it's another parking right and i i'm like oh fuck it
i'll risk it i go over there hey do you what's what's the clearance in there and they're like oh
nine feet they lied to me they said there was no big vehicle parking anyway i'm parked that's my
story nice nice that's it i harassed the people at the gopro booth that's what else you want to
know about sake or we followed our small talk is guys i got to park my truck and i found a place to
park my car so i'm like okay let's park my car so i'm like okay let's park my car so i'm like okay
everyone shut up i talked to the gopro people i showed them this and they were i said like a 3d
printed thing that must be why they sent us one yeah uh so like let's send bob something we'll
use it responsibly i filmed stuff while i'm the worst youtuber in the world i filmed stuff while
i was there and i i import all my footage and all i have is this pointed at the ground while
i'm having a stupid conversation a nine second clip a six second clip of me
in the bus with here going into the camera i'll send sam the clip of that because it's not
and then there's like a out the bus window kind of horribly reflection
thing it's like i think i know why they don't send it because there's no way i could ever
actually show what this thing could do it's like footage from my first ever pax vlog
i forgot to film anything while i was there
well thank god you had your gopro so cinegear is really good this thing is so good please
can i ask why they built a parking garage that can't hold any vehicles i mean trucks are pretty
tall how tall do you think most vehicles are well i feel like if you're going to build a
parking garage you'd want it to hold more than cars my car is a full is a full-size suv but it's
like six two or something like it's it's big but most cars are are under six six
unless it's a truck yeah the f-150 lightning is particularly large like all the honda crvs in the
world all the minivans all the all the big vehicles that just aren't trucks all fit in
there pretty much when you get a car way you'll understand yeah we'll teach you probably be i mean
i barely have clearance in that garage i feel like i'd want it to be taller it's good you get to sit
down and i don't know if he knows mark you get to sit in cars car you don't stand on top of a car
you sit down in it so the height of the car is the same as the height of the car so you don't
know the height of the car you got the spirit airline standing seats in your car for your your
tall it's like a segway car i only know those limousines where you stand sitting out the middle
popping champagne and screaming with your arms in the air that's how i go around he stands sitting
out the middle he really doesn't know cars oh well you must be done now mark you can't possibly
have had other stuff happen i parked my truck i went to apple man people really shouldn't invite
things oh come on man you're such a you're such a fun fun person with fun things and you've got all
that footage recorded we get to see i yeah you are going to have had such a full week i'm glad it all
panned out i did i did i got footage while i was at apple i did i got footage i got some stuff while
i was at gears but it's i i don't want to come across as incompetent because were you in the
secret room where they showed you the unreleased hardware and can you tell us about it you want to
be a leaker i i wasn't is that what you're saying
that's something that leak us mark oh every important person they invite there gets to go
to that room yeah wait hold on they have a secret room where all you wait what do you mean they have
that room oh yes i saw that room oh i'm gonna leak everything it was oh they got they got
everything in there it's so cool i was in the special group he's in the group called paid
guided tour i don't know why i just have this extensive vision of you talking to the to the photo
aesthetic person and you pull your gopro and then you're just frantically like i i i never used that
i don't even know how that got in there i i have a vision pro i look listen i have like oh yeah
how'd you like the latest update oh well my dog borrowed it so uh chick is addicted to it not that
it's addictive i mean it's so fun but uh and i got to meet tom cook it said no relation under i
was a real nice guy i don't know if you're making fun of me or if you actually think his name is tom
no no i'm saying his name is i'm making fun both yes both
you met the wrong person it's funny see this is the thing way you shoot yourself in the foot when
people don't know if you're making a joke or if you just actually can't remember a person's name
it's okay because i still find it funny and no one matters more to me than me when it comes to
humor if i make me laugh i'm happy isn't that the truth so does wade get to talk now or do
you yeah now my small dog is done 38 minutes in i swear i meant to these stories should have taken
only like five minutes at most i don't know how it got drawn out this far how long was the segment
about him parking his truck that was a quick one that was such a quick anecdote it was and then
you know gear expo was i i saw a lot of oh man i gotta tell you guys i went to the mall yesterday
because molly uh
had cracked her, not her screen on her phone.
but the like screen protector had cracked so we went and got that replaced and we got to the mall
uh it was actually pretty busy for like a monday afternoon so it took me like 30 seconds i was
driving up and down like i kind of want to pull straight through but everyone's kind of like
zigzag but i finally found a place where i could pull through and i parked and then went to the
mall and did stuff i got parking stories too i drive i car have and do i believe you more every
time you say it like that and then i had hibachi for lunch it was really good what else have i
done i went to uh i went to my mom's house she has like a pool so i went to her house and i went
swimming ish i have to be careful with my legs so i wasn't going too crazy but i got to get in
water and move around and tried to statically toss football with my nephew without using my legs
which is harder than you'd think if you try to sit on a float and throw a football weird things
happen sometimes with your momentum it turns out so i flipped myself off the back a few times but
it was good
i'm losing my calendar what else did i do last week i met up with jesse our friend jesse we went
out we had uh oh jesse we had dinner i hadn't talked to him since we went we saw iron lung
when it came out and i hadn't seen him since so it was the first time we got together since iron
lung i guess we were celebrating since iron lung's out on youtube we're like let's get together again
i hope more iron lung stuff happens so you could see jesse ever again
you gotta keep that alive we got a blu-ray release i guess and then i i don't know man i don't think
there's anything else it might be the last time i gotta figure out something fancy
to do he only manifests when iron lung is mentioned like a chant you know a demon you
just gotta like iron lung and he sort of fades into existence that's the way it's been this year
it's creepy because he doesn't talk no he just sits there and wearing his iron lung shirt smiling
it's really creepy he's got this weird expression on his face just like the whole time for the
listeners i made this face that face sounds like this hank joined bj's wholesale club the day he
became a father of 30 i coach football now coach hank saves up to 25 off grocery store prices
30 pounds of pasta three cases of protein bars 75 sports drinks and that's just pre-game he knows
teamwork and bj's knows savings this is your home coach home of the save join for just 20
dollars at bjs.com slash mesquite and save 10 cents per gallon for six months open soon
limited time offer new members only bj's home of the save
yeah that's actually pretty accurate yeah that's pretty good he made the face that you make when
you make that noise which is not the face that i make when i make that noise just to be clear for
the viewers who got confused by what he just said so i guess over over in blue ash there was an
airport at some point i don't know when but they converted it into like a bar grill slash uh like
big park area so we went over there and we had dinner which was pretty good but it was a beautiful
spot and like the old air traffic control towers like the old air traffic control towers like the
covered and like pretty lights and stuff now so it's just a really beautiful spot that was nice
it was nice getting out catching up with him for a few hours because we hadn't talked like i said
in months but getting out of the house kind of breaking the routine a little bit's been nice
just trying different things to get out of the supernatural funk that's been this year so far so
pool water and air bar i drink so i don't drink very much you guys remember the
drunk minecraft days i used to be like oh it's a double long island and all that shit
i had one cider at this bar with food and still i was like well it
might need to sit here for like two hours or else you're driving home oh my god this thing's like six
percent alcohol so i had one cider and i about knocked me on my ass so i'm definitely not a
drinker i'm very lightweight i'm just getting out of the house breaking the routine a little bit i
don't know i don't i don't do fancy things there's no fancy stores or things i go to so just uh
normal human behavior for me is a big deal i played diablo 2 again resurrected the old 1999 game
and uh learning how hard that game can be still compared to the newer ones kicks my ass i feel
like there was something else i wanted to add but i god i'm boring i should have gone first i'm so
boring oh come on man you're not boring don't be like that remember how mark parked his truck
that was the good stuff i had lunch with my mom and i poured uh alcohol on her on accident
that happened like pouring one out for your homies kind of
no uh we had lunch and she had um like a prosecco or something and the waiter dropped off a check
and i was like i'll get it and as i went to get the check i just threw the prosecco on her
on accident so it's kind of rude man the highlights of my week yeah mark didn't even talk about the
visa thing it's not that interesting it's sort of just crazy that that happened because of course
it did anyway we didn't get to talk about real good ai on at south by so we'll do a makeup stream
at some point in the future it'll be even better yeah i guess i don't know what the event was
originally supposed to be was it all a conference about real good ai or was it like a segment as a
like what was the it was south by southwest london right so it was not the main one in austin but it
was it's like a i don't even know what south by southwest is there's like a music festival there's
like movie premieres and like but but the they have like talks that are kind of in the vein of
like ted talk kind of but not really ted talky but like the theme this year was like talks focused
around ai and how ai is intersecting with stuff uh so we were going to talk about what real good
is doing gotcha so the event probably started around the same time as the event started
so we were going to talk about what the event started around the same time as the event started
oh yeah no like tons of shit michelle obama was there it was they did not notice
that we did how'd she get there she has to visa like the rest of us right i don't know
her thing was actually a day earlier than ours so she probably traveled right before that whole
thing happened michelle let us know how you got it can i call you michelle let's know how you got it
i'm i do not condone him addressing you that way whatsoever this is on behalf of mark and bob they
really want to know no don't listen to me don't listen to me don't listen to me don't listen to
him listen this is obama cut the whole bit cut the whole bit cut it bail bail sam hit the emergency
button hey well i'm sorry you guys didn't get to go hopefully how long was the visa thing down is
it still down it was literally for like 48 hours right when mark needed it i got my notification
that my visa was approved like that evening you guys missed your flight then it was like
all right well now you can't make it you could go yeah yeah exactly all right small talk
done all right bob we did a timely manner yeah we got lots of time that's okay that's okay this game
this game can be as long or short as we want it to be and by the way it's i i don't know i'm saying
it's a game like it's it's not a game is it called long or short oh what if it was and now i'll be
disappointed if it's not this game is called long or short i'm not disappointed i feel like you're
lying but i'm happy about it the new name of the game that just popped up into my head uh has
nothing to do with the game
and doesn't describe it in any meaningful way but i'm gonna go ahead and call it long or short
anyway hey my leg's bleeding dude i took rose bushes out yesterday with a chainsaw it is as
fun as it sounds but holy fuck do rose bushes fight back god damn yeah yes yeah i'm at that
age where i get like the cuts and bruises i'm like i remember getting this giant scrape what
happened to me are you 73 years old what do you mean by that i know what happened i'm not confused
why i have a scab down there no i literally get like beat up and i have
no idea yeah i don't know how this gap happened so i'm i'm in that same boat and i'm you guys need
to be more careful don't worry bob you're like two months away from our age you'll know you'll
know in two months what we're talking about i think you're the youngest of us right let's say
our age at the same time one two three 36 oh so i thought we were doing he's young got him is that
bad now all right long or short also known as doing too much uh i have a list of some things i
brought this to my attention and i looked into it and i have a problem have you guys ever heard
of dr bronner's soap i'm familiar with this product it's a product no i'm not it's pure
canyoning so what the hell is it called pure something castile castile yeah i don't know what
that word means but pure castile soap dr bronner's on their own website lists this soap which is just
a liquid soap as having 18 or more
uses and it starts off completely sane and rational because they're like it's a face wash
it's a body wash it could be shampoo it could be used for shaving lather it could be bath soap
which to me is not different from body wash or any of that other shit but like it's a list of
and then it starts going downhill because they're like it could be toothpaste what
it could be aftershave you could use it to clear congestion from your sinus
also it's a window cleaner and a toilet bowl cleaner you can use it for mopping you can use
it to wash your fruit and vegetables it's a plant and pest spray yes it's a thing that if you spray
it on plants or on the ground it will keep insects away from those things who is doing all this shit
i am not using that as a toothpaste yeah i was gonna say it kills things but you could use this
toothpaste this product is doing too much shit okay that's too many things
it's too bold i do think it's worth noting that specifically the one that grosses me out
among the ones that gross me out is the toothpaste it does specifically say like
you could use it as toothpaste it just tastes like soap so don't do that but you could use
it for toothpaste i'm like well why no you couldn't then like if you would use lots of
stuff for toothpaste if you don't care that it tastes like an ass that's not what toothpaste is
toothpaste has like a minty or a cinnamony flavor it's supposed to
be like good this product is doing too much and i want to talk about products
are out here doing too much because i feel like we live in a time where technology is going too far
and every every new product that comes out is like well what if it just does everything
what if it's an air fryer and deodorant can we make that combination happen
i was afraid you were bringing this up because you're going to say something about me doing
too much for a certain company that won't be no no no no no i was going to take offense to that
look it worked out you got me a gopro is that not what you wanted to have happen
because if it's not what you wanted to have happen then i guess it really didn't work out
technically it was the distractible so we have a gopro we got exactly what mark wanted i thought
that was going great i was not going to make fun of you for that i want you guys to come up with
products and it could be like genres of products or could be specific things
that are out here doing too much i have another one on my list that i wanted to talk about
because this is a different product that is listed and advertised by the company that makes it
as having over 2 000 uses holy and i have some quibbles with the nature of the list that
this company has put together but the product wd-40 which is if you've never used it or seen
it wd-40 is like a spritzy can thing of it's i don't even know what technically it's called it's
not really a lubricant technically it's for like cleaning i i've always heard of wd-40 used in the
context of like oh if you you can clean cleaning greasy things with it clean it off and then you
apply fresh you know whatever but wd-40 is advertised it's having over 2 000 uses but
their list is just a bunch it has more than that because the list is it lubricates ashtrays for
easy sliding it lubricates auto hood latches it lubricates automatic seat belt tracks it lubricates
automatic side view mirror it could lubricate everything in the known universe it has an infinite
number of uses if that's the list of it can do isn't wd-40 not even a lubricant this is
a common misconception wd-40 is not a lubricating agent you should not rely on it as a lubricant
it is a solvent i think technically it's great for cleaning things it can be used as sort of
like a penetrating oil or on rusty thing it does a lot but the one thing i would say it's
definitively not is a lubricant for anything okay but let's rewind it's a solvent okay whenever we
were in math class back in the day they'd hand you with like a word problem what was the last
time it was like please solve you can't have solvent without solve therefore it's a solution
therefore it's the answer so wd-40 is just the answer well he's definitely not gonna get points
for this game because it's about doing too much not defending it dude well wd-40 is not you know
it does do too much you know here's a point frank's red hot what'd you put that on oh that's
right everything hey i will not tolerate the frank's red hot slander uh it does one thing
which is hot sauce it hot sauces things that's not what it says you listen to the logo i put
that on everything your kid crying breaks red hot out of lube in the bedroom breaks red hot
squeaky door breaks red hot out of windshield wiper fluid breaks red hot i put that on
everything all right you know okay all right you know what you actually just convinced me of
something and i swear to god that might be the first time ever i was ready to jump all over you
i was going to interrupt you to be like you're wrong and you directly addressed my exact concerns
and convinced me that you are in fact correct that was an excellent argument wayne all it took was
four years for me to get one right uh every point friend in the past has been illegitimate i hear it
i've heard it confirmed here hey i don't give points because i agree okay i get points out of
obligation all right i got an example of this um i never had this but i had a different bamboo lab
printer the bamboo lab h2d i think is the name of it when it came out was an example of doing too
much uh it tried it brought forward this everyone excited because like oh it'll have two nozzles
whoa you could do so much with two print nozzles this will be great you could put sport film in but
then it was like the h2d multi-nozzle ams also it's a laser cutter you get laser cutters in there and
it's just like everyone's like huh what like no one we didn't ask for that i just got a laser 10
watt 41 you know you could get your lasers in here it's like i wanted a 3d printer and it's like it's
not that the lasers laser it's not that the laser cutter is a bad thing we actually have a laser
cutter or jason has a laser cutter and we laser cut things all the time but it's a separate machine
because when you laser cut things there's a lot of fumes and things uh because it's burning pretty
much uh woods and metals and plastics and you kind of want to make sure that's a filtered solution
well don't you need special glasses two or so like lasers you can't mess around with lasers
three printing you you need some stuff but lasers you need like properly rated or
you will burn your eyes out potentially right like so they have like different glass for the laser
version of it to enclose it because there are these laser cutter enclosures and they usually
have it x tool is like the example of the laser cutter uh company manufacturer that makes the
laser cutter that we have it's not that this is a bad idea to have it it's just like why because
they only had the other well they had that and then the smaller cheaper version of it but it's
like two nozzles would have been great it would have been perfect if it just jumped one nozzle
like but they were like and also it can do laser it doesn't have to
have a laser cutter but it's also just like feels like it's doing too much
i did i did always think i've just only recently actually got into 3d printing but i've always been
a fan and i always felt like i get why they they think the overlap of people who are into 3d
printing and people who would use a laser cutter is probably pretty substantial right because if
you're if you're making stuff if you're a maker you probably would like both of those tools if
you could have them but if you're a maker who cares enough to have either a 3d printer or a
laser cutter
in your like arsenal of stuff you probably want pretty specific things i guess i thought and those
this is like this gives the vibes of that thing you know it's like a made for tv product where
it's like it slices it dices it feels it juliennes it and it's like well it does all of those things
kind of shitty doesn't it like because because it's not any one of those things doesn't it do
all of them pretty half-assed compared to like what a dedicated laser cutter would be doing or i
it just seems it also just feels dangerous i 3d printing i have no fears about and i know there's
fumes and you have to be you have to be kind of careful and think about but laser lasers is just
a whole other level of like i would not invite that into my house because i don't think i'm
careful enough to use laser sure it's all safe and enclosed but that's that's a good pandering
answer because you know i love that and you know i have bamboo labs products big fan let's talk
about the big one duct tape duct tape is used to build tools duct tape and dungeon crawler carls
used to build bombs duct tape can fix your car duct tape can build your house duct tape can patch
your wounds duct tape is the glue that holds the earth itself together i'm convinced if another
meteor hits we'll patch up the hole with duct tape that's what will keep us all around because duct
tape is there a more important if you think about getting stuck on an island is there an item other
than like food or water that you could think that would be half a million dollars worth of duct tape
than like food or water that you could think that we have more use than duct tape i'm trying not to
let my personal feelings about duct tape get in the way here because i love duct tape yeah same
but like it's it's got infinite uses i think the thing here is this might be the one and only
product in existence where i think you're right it's doing a lot but i don't think you could say
it's doing too much because i think it does everything good enough but that's where it's scary
it does do too much because we rely on it it's good though it is until it goes away the problem with
all this stuff is like well i wouldn't want to use it for toothpaste that's gross every duct tape use
is like yeah you can use duct tape for that that would work like you you know it might not be as
good as what you're supposed to use but that would work fine duct tape would work fine for our
purposes duct tape always works i can't think of a situation where i'm like oh well i wouldn't want
to use duct tape for that but we become too reliant on it no but that's the duct tape ever
goes away we're it won't if duck if we lose all of human history duct tape will be one of the first
things that we reinvent because that's how we'll invent every other thing let's hope but duct tape
itself as the brand trademark c circle tm we we rely way too much okay well if we're going to talk
about brands that gets really complicated okay are you talking about the brand of duct tape that is
put out by like 3m or are you talking about the brand oh i'm talking about mr duct himself duck
tape the brand whose mascot is a duck this is don't get me started on brands of don't even get
me started on gorilla tape which some might argue is a superior version of duct tape are gorillas
superior to ducks i don't know i think that that's a complicated issue duct tape's uses i agree are
great but i think it is useful for too much and we are too reliant on duct tape because if duct tape
ever becomes like intelligent and leaves the planet and we have no more duct tape
then what are we going to do mark you're unbiased does he get a point for that one
ah man i can see it both ways because yeah it's it because i bet the manufacturer is like
hey this is for ducts we made it's duct tape but everyone in the world is like i can use
for repairing your boat waterproofing you can put up your walls broken nose duct tape annoying kid
duct tape it's it's one of those things where it's like is it really the fault of the manufacturer
or is it are they complicit i think they're complicit i think they have adopted it i think
it's fair to say that that clearly they originally didn't but they are obviously now duct tape
probably has a thing on their website that's like it has 500 uses or more stick it i stick that shit
on everything frank's duct tape frank's red duct tape don't put it on your skin don't put it on
your skin anything else but don't fuck don't put it on here all right i'm confused how exactly to
spell it when i write it down uh p-d-u-c-k-t the p is silent or do a d
all right i got i got another one it's a bit niche but you know mine are always going to
be tech based because of tech tech guy so uh
there's there's a camera out there not not talking about gopro i swear to fuck
there's something called a ronin 4d right so the ronin 4d is probably the textbook definition of
doing too much it i have it i have it because i was like this seems like super cool oh man it
could be the future it could the oh this is the perfect camera it definitely is an example of
doing too much it's not only a
cinema camera it's a built-in gimbal with a z-axis lidar with like uh uh uh like hand grips
from focus wheels and it can auto focus with the lidar and it can have all this transmission out
and it seems like it seems like on on its surfaces wow this is really great uh but the more and more
i have gone down this cinema road i have realized that there is a prohibitive nature to grabbing that
when all i need is a shot um for most of film production or at least stuff that i do
the the shots that i sometimes prefer are just on a tripod i it's bold that i just enter the
movie sphere and i'm like i get to have opinions here but i feel like i do a little bit is like
i feel like not every shot needs motion not every shot needs to push in i really like the pov where
something is bolted on to a car right where it's fixed stuck there not moving it even gets a little
shake from the car too i don't need a perfectly smooth yada yada all the time there are times
when you need it there are times when you definitely need it and the camera is like it
shoots good i haven't really shot and used that much from it because again it's like really hard
to get all set up and every all the bells and whistles working and you know i often find myself
just not using it because of that but it's useful there's a need for it but it's a good camera
it's like it's just doing too much it's trying to do all the things and it's super limiting in the
number of lenses that you can use on it because it's like it has to be light enough to fit on
there so it's doing all this stuff and you still can't really use yeah it has interchangeable lenses
but the for people who don't have pictures in front of you or our listeners this is basically
a camera imagine a camera as like i don't know like this right but bigger a cinema camera is
kind of like this gopro it's bigger but the lens is a thing you can interchange on most nice cameras
but this camera would be like if this gopro thing existed but then the lens was like up here and so
there's like the main body of the camera but then the lens is maybe like a quarter the size of the
main camera body but it's like because it's gimbal yeah but so you can having an interchangeable lens
on that would basically be like constantly well every time you change it you change the
counterbalance of the thing that balancing gimbals is such a huge fucking pain in the ass when you're
using gimbaled stuff i assumed it was like a fixed lens like a very they have their own lenses but
they only have like five and it's like it can auto calibrate to what it is but it's like i
wouldn't want to use those lenses anyway because they're kind of on the cheaper side and the lighter
side and yes with gimbals you have to rebalance but these motors aren't strong enough to take the
big lenses so it's like you would need a stronger gimbal anyway to do a lot of this stuff i feel
like you're doing as much setup but with the limitations and yes for certain people this is
great like for them but also it is doing too much that is a very niche but very interesting uh one
i like that well and when i didn't realize this was a camera isn't ronin also a line of dji
gimbals in general yes isn't that just like they make us i don't know if it's a set or or whatever
like a series of products but it's a different thing right yes so they have their ronin series
of gimbals this is the ronin cinema camera they have the rs series which is the smaller
factor but they've kind of scaled it up but also they have the cinema standard is the ronin 2 is like
for most productions they're like the ronin 2 is the stabilizer to use for smaller productions or
whatever um but they haven't updated that in like 10 years they don't there's no ronin 3 uh there's
an rs 5 now i think but i don't know it's uh it's a whole thing it's like you know that particular
camera and i can say this because i have it and i'm like i find myself i'm probably going to sell
it because it's just like i do not use it enough to justify it
"wait give me something weird"
spray bottles expound yeah i made this expression listeners
so you have a bottle you put liquid in it right you spray spray water water your plants you spray
poison you can kill plants you put in good smelling sprays good smelling sprays make your
house smell good you put in i don't know acid and spray someone to melt them it sounds crazy but you
could you know what's crazy about the spray bottle is liquid as long as it doesn't melt the bottle
goes in it what's in the bottle hope it's labeled oh you're reusing it afterward guess it's not
labeled now hope i remember five years from now what i put in there for the niche use that it had
so spray bottles they can be used for too much because there's too many variances of what liquids
could be is it acidic is it base is it somewhere in between does it smell good does it smell bad
does it keep things alive does it kill things i don't know really hope me with my really shit
memory remembers what i was using this particular spray bottle for
how thoroughly do i have to clean the bottle if i want to go from poison to live i think maybe
just don't go that direction yeah i think maybe you just if you just have one that's like that's
the poison one maybe that's i see you're relying on someone with a good memory or the labels and
again if you can reuse spray bottles then the labels don't mean anything because you can empty
it out and then you just have an empty bottle empty quote unquote besides all the murderous
residue that lies inside waiting for the right moment to escape when you can i counterpoint this
because i think like i you know i've kind of been on your side for the other ones i might i might say
i have a better spray-based thing that is actually doing too much garden hose sprays why they got all
those other dial settings that i don't use because the spray bottle i'm like it's got two it's well
three maybe it's got on narrow and wide and i'm like i could see uses for all of and off
and it's got i could see uses for all those well some of them have like the the array of like
little boo
bigger as you go well that's that's what i'm talking like the garden hose spray has like
i only use two the lot of liquid or the far liquid or the wide liquid that's all i need i need to
i need to go this i need to go all the way over there or i need a garden hose i have thumb or no
thumb man's man's never owned a sprayer the garden hose sprayer some of the deluxe version have like
40 settings and i gotta click all the way through all of them meanwhile my petunias are getting
and before i get to the one i need because the the the one i need is on the opposite dial of the
other one but see you have to hit some like plants with the real light spray but some of the trees
that really just want to know if they can take it you have to hit with the harder spray so it makes
sense that's what i'm saying those are the only ones i need i need i need mist the harder mist
shower uh laser lasers laser and then uh open the damn gates flood you know that's the four i need
maybe there's one more but there's way too many dial settings don't forget the fire hose that's
that's what i mean the the the gusher it does feel like someone was given that assignment and the guy
whoever assigned it was like give me eight sprays and they were like well aren't there really like
three tops like maybe four and the and his boss was like eight sprays tomorrow on my desk and the
guy was like okay well you got the ones everyone knows and then what if there was cone but see this
is tangential because like the direction and shape of the spray versus what you're actually spraying
are related but they're two different things yeah i guess i was jumping on marks because i
i'm having a hard time with the spray bottle argument i feel like especially if you're
talking about spray bottle argument i feel like especially if you're talking about spray bottle
argument i feel like especially if you're talking about using up something that came in a spray
bottle you use the bottle of windex the windex is gone and then you keep that and you're like well
i put poison in this windex bottle how am i supposed to maybe you're not a person who's
supposed to be multi-purposing these things maybe once the windex is gone wade should throw away the
spray bottle i feel like this isn't about the personal use this is about the product and the
product allows reuse at some point it's on you to know your limitations it's not the spray bottle
's fault the spray bottle is not trying to be everything does the bottle say get rid of after
emptying i don't think it says that on there probably are you kidding me almost every product
says please discard if damaged or when done using or whatever right because like for liability i'm
sure not
in the title it just says windex oh so if you didn't read it it doesn't say it i forgot about
that okay like the thing about spray bottles is they can do a lot but also that's that's on you
they're not windex is not like and when you're done fill it with hyaluronic acid and use it to
spray your skincare regimen onto your what about the non-labeled bottles you buy that are just
empty bottles you rip you rip off the bottles of them or they come empty well they sell they sell
i own some of those they sell unlabeled bottles those are usually for a purpose you know what my
unlabeled bottles are for i have one that i mix my like floor cleaning solution into because i
have a big jug of floor cleaner that you're supposed to mix into a smaller thing and i
have one that i mix dish soap into because dish soap is really inconvenient to use unless it's
diluted with water and then you could spray it on the counter and clean whatever but i don't have
like 30 spray bottles with rent i don't go to the cabinet and be like let's pick a mystery spray and
spray it on some stuff let's see what happens what about the spray bottle that is actually a
nozzle you hook up to a hose in order to spray the water and the product at the same time combining
the two things that mark and i are talking about no i i get i'm now on wade's side if if you can
also entertain another in this okay keep expounding yes yes i think electrical sockets are doing too
much you can plug anything into it i can plug a a hedge trimmer a
coaster a kilomatic 9000 i i would be a fork i could eat a fork i could plug it right in it's
doing too much i agree wade it's you there's nothing on the plug that says don't plug in the
nuclear explosion right into there you know the overload the nuclear reactor nearby plug that i
have uh don't ask me where i got it but you know that's not doing too much very specific use for
that and then i plug it in and i'm dead and everyone's dead you know and don't even get me
back that you go over to europe and it's a different shaped outlet that does the same thing
and then you've got the adapters like oh i've got to plug in my australia plug my germany plug my us
plug my antarctica plug you're winning me over you're winning me over if we can entertain one
more you know what else it is doing the exact same kind of way too much yeah yeah vehicles
you can take vehicles anywhere in the known universe excuse me you could drive a car
on the road sure on your driveway in your garage on the bottom of the ocean what troops into battle
oversized load on the highway carry an actual another vehicle carry 10 other vehicles some
people sleep in them can you imagine me me honk me me me in a car cars think that their house is now
hold all those dirty ass soccer kids that are covered in mud you know who else is doing too
much the james webb telescope it thinks it can look at anything in the world
universe it can point anywhere man just looking it's not even just one light spectrum it's multiple
light spectrums i think when you come to infinite you are definitely doing too much you know you
know what i'm saying you know what else the human body does way too much reproduces it eats it poops
it pisses it vomits makes earwax it spits the appendix like can we talk about that what the
yeah i know right what are you doing what are you doing there a little it just dies that's all it
does you know what else is doing too much electrons those little bastards are everywhere
they're in pretty much everything like i think almost everything every element on the table
you're like oh they got different numbers all electro it's electrons all the way through it's
doing all of it it's trying to be everything not they don't even know where it is it's in orbitals
gets excited i don't want to know about that swiss army knife one thought you were neutral
why do you have an army two are you a bottle opener
you're a wine opener you're whittling you're cutting you're stabbing you're twisting you're
pulling you're you're a boppet of murder for a country that's like we love peace or whatever
and cheese i don't know what you're doing over there swiss i'm so glad you brought it up bop it
not the three version the five version ridiculous it was already hard enough you had infinite
difficulty escalation with speed going up on the original bop but you do not need five i don't need
to twist it i definitely don't need to flick it bacon have twisted i'm glad you brought that up
condoms are condoms there to stop pregnancy are they ribbed for her pleasure are they juiced for
your pleasure are they liquefied for don't feel it are they extra solid for like made of wood
tell me about these condoms not bringing you distractible condoms ever wanted to not feel it
liquid it's such a bottle comes in a spray bottle because they can do anything spray on condoms
why don't we just use duct tape ah the unremovable condom i like that no mistakes here ever wanted
to feel like you were an air duct get distractible band condoms and it's okay you
could just poke a hole so you could pee wait don't you hate it when you're having sex and you're like
i gotta go to the bathroom just use your swiss army knife penis hole poker and just hit it with the
old it's the round curly one that's the one you want penises do do too much you you got your
your bladder evacuation and reproduction nonsense and speaking of the little curly talk about ducks
those things are terrifying all right man well no everyone knows about duck penises you know about
duck penises mark i know i know i just you know why do you know about that we covered everything
we covered everything that's everything man yeah i think that was guy i didn't know if we were going
to be able to get through all of it but i think we pretty much covered everything that is uh doing
too much don't do anything with this information uh you know keep using you know whatever products
you normally use it's fine uh now that we've solved that problem that everyone in the world
was so concerned about uh let's let's see who got points for what i don't know what some of these
things mean wade in no particular order you got points for not caring about james won't be it won't
be invited back which i think you said to mark which made him sad uh apple jam jokes very funny
yeah mark you earned points for not having a car still is this this episode i don't remember yeah
yeah iron lung jesse getting cider drunk off of one cider uh frank's red hot duct tape uh spray
bottles james webb telescope human bodies bop it of murder for a total of 11 points for wade mark
when did i not care about james i don't remember that i was so long ago i don't remember but it was
in small talk i remember yeah uh mark you earned points for commanding sam and you earned points for
the first time in a firm but respectful way uh being sad about gopro for no apparent reason can't
remember what that was about lying about your trip to apple being wonderful so that you could stay
friends with tim apple uh showing your cool picture from reddit to tim apple making me jealous
because the apple stuff uh you i we didn't talk about this but i gave you a point because i thought
it was impressive your car was six foot six you were too tall to go somewhere mark that must have
felt pretty good it felt awkward actually you got a point for being a bad youtuber
uh you got a point for pointing out that the bamboo lab h2d was doing too much
uh ronin 4d electrons and the boppet extreme which somehow the boppet of murder came up first
about the swiss army knife and that led to marketing a point for the boppet extreme
uh but anyway in a real shocker mark you earned a total of 12 points it's not at all because i was
jealous that you got to do some really cool stuff this week and it's because you earned it mark i
think that the flaw of trying of having a lot of things happen in life is that wade can earn points
on on small talk too so if if i if i don't come in with confident small talk then if anyone makes a
joke about it i think that's an opportunity for points so i'm strategizing for the future
it's good to do that out loud in front of your opponents he'll forget don't worry
you're right uh let's see how many spins we're going to spin man the bar in the wheel man
my my horrible streak continues all right there's a chance two two is a good number for today one
goes to bob one goes to me and we have a tie uh i am adding to this wheel oh i i didn't really come
up with this i will say i i had my notes like the person who did too much this episode but that feels
like one of those ones where every time it comes up we're gonna be like i don't really know if
anyone did too much this time i don't know if that counts and i want it to be one that actually hits
so just to just to make the small talk a little bit more uh meaningful on the points point for
whoever had the most small talk just has to be voluminous most small wait that's confusing small
talk there you go most small hello so mark is winning 12 to 11. we have two spins all right
tying it up right here tammy regularly hauls stuff to her kids at college that's why she shops at bj's
wholesale club saving up to 25 off grocery store prices beef jerky microwave meals laundry pods
even they can't screw up have you met my kids and with bj's gas she gets there for less they
call me the road warrior this is your home road warrior mom home of the save join for just 20
at bjs.com mesquite and save 10 cents per gallon for six months open soon limited
time offer new members only bj's home of the save
wah boom
live points absolute hey all right that's still good for me that's still good for me
so that counts as a spin and nobody had any live points yeah yep yeah all right
tie it up right here all right let's not don't do that most bald my ass my ass my ass
my ass that's why i always pay attention to what's coming up my ass he still hasn't said it so i feel
like it has to go to mark my uh reading comprehension the y and the top was cut off
i was like sav my ass what does that mean i'll save i'll save your ass i was like save my ass
oh say mark going my ass my ass my ass my ass didn't give you any hints well it did but by
then it was too late so i just accepted the l but uh i'm just trying to figure out why my brain
thought the first y was a v and the second one was a y when they looked exactly the same i'll
say look at my ass just in case i was part of the rule i don't think it was but just if if some
obscure redditor out there is like it was supposed to be about say look at my you know what the thing
about that is mark is we don't give a shit right that's true before we get into the loser speeches
and wrap up the episode did you guys want to take a look at the bounty board or anything
did anyone have a bounty ticket they want to cash in any any bounty action
today we have one of those now we have a bounty board it's on the oh it's on the reddit you don't
go on so i guess that's oh okay i'll take a look at that uh yeah i've got so many to turn in i'm
gonna save them though i i honestly i have plans already to execute on a few of these but i have
i don't have one today i'm the host so it's kind of a waste anyway but i'm excited by the bounty
board keep putting stuff out there check out the thread on the subreddit because i probably have
some also no one has taken the initiative if you want us to spend the budget the 600 a month
allocation we're gonna need to see if we can get it done so we're gonna need to see if we can get
some democracy in the subreddit okay i would like i would like to see a discussion thread i would
like to see some proposals set forth i would like to see maybe some votes taken i don't know we're
we're not just gonna we're not gonna willy-nilly do stuff though i'm gonna i need to see some
consensus building all right i want to see some uh let's see some allies out there making stuff
happen because i do want to do that it's not just on us okay this is our show comrades yes all that
stuff i said
i'm trying i think we should build that in as like every episode we should do a little check-in
on the bounty stuff just to see also that's the point where if someone was going to cash in a
bounty and steal the episode that feels like the moment where it's like ah five points for me and
then you or whatever we decided last time it was like one point or two points right yeah i can't
remember where the cutoff was no bounty stuff today tonight today whatever uh wait loser speech
uh i want to throw out i think we forgot to do speeches last episode but i think that's because
we were just having uh we were having a real talk
episode so it was it's fine people were mentioning that on the subreddit it's fine i think it's fine
acknowledging that it happened but like i think we're all cool with that over here so therefore
you're cool with it you know it's been it's been nice getting outside it was nice having the last
episode where we got to open up a bit it was nice hearing uh about mark's uh crazy life again in
some ways i'm like oh man i'm jealous i'd love to do all that stuff at the same time i'm like you
know just getting outside and like going to the pool being i don't know just simple things i'm
here at the computer all the time so honestly it might be a loss of an episode but it's been a win
of a week and hopefully uh that continues and things are all in the ups for everybody just you
know my loser speech just pushing the good vibes and we all have some good vibes thanks loser mark
winner speech well well well this is completely unexpected who would have thought that me would
reign victory over there with my interesting interesting life with all the things that i'm
doing with the special groups that i'm part of when i go to these special events that is actually very
special and just because i wasn't with all the other youtubers doesn't mean that i'm not special
it makes me more special i think because i've ascended beyond being just a youtuber i am now a
filmmaker and so i'm on another level entirely and this victory solidifies all of that i will
use my uh judicial ability abilities uh to change the word abilities to abilities first second to
make sure that uh my my titles are respected and i will have a herald using the funds appropriated
by our congress to buy me a herald to announce my arrival in every action like much like a king
not saying i'm okay but you know you can just buy people named herald yeah it's my speech i'm not
done excuse you uh sam please expunge him from the universe sam you're sponging me he's an expunge
all right okay so uh i'm done he's ascended beyond youtuber he's now
super tuber now he's a me tuber uh congratulations spark you will be the host of the
next episode uh everyone make sure you follow all of us but possibly most importantly the show
on like platforms and stuff marcus mark plier wait is lord minion 777 i am my skirm the show
is distractible uh we have a youtube channel we're on all your podcast platforms is to subscribe
hit the plus whatever follow the show make sure you check out the merch distractible
shop.shop store distractible shop.shop store comma distractible.store
no it's shop i was wrong fuck that was no if you want to get merch you have to remove really
quickly because it comes and goes fast thank you everyone for buying all the merch thank you for
listening to this episode mark is going to host the next one so make sure you come back for that
anyway we're out of here see you on the next one podcast out
tammy regularly hauls stuff to her kids at college that's why she shops at bj's wholesale club saving
up to 25
off grocery store prices beef jerky microwave meals laundry pods even they can't screw up
have you met my kids and with bj's gas she gets there for less they call me the road warrior this
is your home road warrior mom home of the save join for just 20 at bj's.com slash mesquite and
save 10 cents per gallon for six months open soon limited time offer new members only bj's home of
the save
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