David's Plan to Meet the Pope

what's up guys we'll look to views we are back with another pod lfg which means let's fucking go so well let's just skip the acronyms and start going into the pod a s a p o coming i hate so much but i like drives me nuts lfg now when people say stuff about the vlogs and they're like isn't that where they're always non stop laughing oh i hate that it drives me nuts because it's like yeah we are but you can I show you the raw footage yeah because for 99% of the time yeah we're depressed but i just i i i i i i i feel like people think we're walking around just in hysterics all the time yeah and that frustrates me it's like i'm only i'm cutting because we are laughing and i'm not laughing on purpose yeah i'm only laughing you only saw that clip because we were all having a good time in that moment that pisses me off so much so should we laugh at anything it's like well not sure maybe if you don't find it funny it's because nothing funny happened for us in the last hour and that was the funniest moment yeah so like i kind of got us hootin hollarin mm-hmm you ever feel that now you feel that kind of I love to hootin hollarin oh yeah obviously she's dead inside yeah i i made Natalie stay here so our friends land tonight at midnight from the airport Mike and Nick my hometown friends Nick I bought an Audi 4 Mike on Mercedes that's yeah if you're thinking about the video terms that's where they were okay i had an idea where we were we were going to go convoy and pick them up yeah and this is my first convoy ever this is a trend on tiktok no so there's this YouTuber called Ethan Wang and Ethan helps us out at our videos now yeah and he in his videos i don't think he invented this but he made me aware of this yeah is when you convoy it's you take like four super cars and you drive down the highway like side by side and it's just like badass like me and the boys are going raw so me and the boys are going me and the boys are going to live in a Dean show I live in a Dean show yeah wow that's actually the best place to convoy probably i'll put that on my on my to do is stop my home goods no so we're gonna take all all the cars that we have we have two essence two Ferrari's yeah and we're just gonna convoy down to the airport surprise Mike and Nick have not seen the Valhalla okay and that'll be and and it's kind of fun to pick up people at the airport within the supercar yeah so who's in what car I haven't decided that I'm gonna take the Valhalla I mean what's car do you want I want the Ferrari which one oh the gray one oh you want the red one no I'll take the red one that's why power steering is broken on the red one okay I call Ferrari and I was like can can we fix the power steering yeah and normally they tell your car they fix it they do everything for free my warranties up I know how much they want to fix it I didn't even ask I just hung up I was like no power steering it is I don't want to fucking hear that bill fix fix the power series probably seven thousand dollars yeah I mean yeah that's fuck that that's Ferrari fuck that yeah but it's a free Ferrari both my Ferrari's are free and they're going to stay that way how does power steering just stop working I don't get that guys I have an idea should we also when they land and guys if you're listening to this you're getting to this is the behind the scenes I also have an idea so really put that out there of when they land potentially yeah okay I had an idea okay mine could be a two-parter or one-parter mine could be they land we and we obviously we're flexing on them with these cars which they're excited to see it's not it's just like being like fuck you look at LA you slanted from suburbs but should we like all should we give him ten thousand dollars each what I was so random but I'm all for it I guess it's funny because they're going to hear this and if we don't decide to do it yeah it's on one of you guys whoever says now I mean I mean what did we just talk about today we just had a financial meeting today about the overspending that is happening and David keeps telling me I don't even spend that much money you do little things like this where you're just like oh I'm gonna go buy a watch for somebody or or I'm gonna give somebody ten thousand dollars like that adds up really quickly okay so yeah ten kids so let me just tell you this Mike and Nick are gonna hate you after this bomb buzzkill that we're gonna cut the boo wait a minute wait a minute I want to know about the spending meeting that today wait also I really want to know how much money he has it's not good really yeah they were like he can't keep spending the way he's spending yeah because these videos are costs in 250 exactly automatically I was like yeah before the videos we weren't having these meetings no it's not it's not about the videos the videos like the videos a pay for themselves yeah break even is it John salary that's breaking you guys one thousand percent were letting go of John yeah I mean I wasn't gonna say that here on the pod no we're talking about all the BTS right now on the pod telling you fired yeah Alex Nick or Mike and Nick give a thousand dollars a piece Mike and Nick get John salary there we go they're solved but I was also thinking like we give him the money and then we can go straight to Casino what David brother it's fucking midnight okay sorry I did not I've been moving around okay we'll just come we'll come we'll come way here's my idea we'll come way to the crispy cream okay that we bring them you know Randy's donuts is right down by the airport we come way to Randy's donuts oh my god okay well this was her great idea well that is kind of funny it's so funny well now we have to get the donuts because yeah no we have to get the donuts and half a 10k yeah someone they're listening to this they'll be like wait there that was the other option it was a dozen glazed donuts I don't know if there's a crispy cream near the airport we should go to Randy's donuts because it's got that iconic iron man that big donut that's an iron man yeah but it's really close to the airport I feel like that would be a good place to convoy because you could you can park your cars yeah and I dropped Navino off at the airport but we should go to LA X or sorry in and out no isn't that like the thing to get them when they land and now we'll be closed by them what what no no it's open to the one am and that's fine there's a Randy's right next to the airport okay I'm down I'm down to either one so Mike and Nick if you're listening to this you're out 20k sorry but I'm pretty excited about this combo I've never done anything like it it's fine I mean they they look so cool yeah they look cool I don't know why you've never done it before you don't just I thought we we have convoyed now we've never come in Miami with the EA with who yeah all those sports cars oh yeah we did we did we did we did we did yeah yeah we do think they're gonna say when they see all the cars they're gonna be like is this a convoy yeah I'm staying here I'll say additional hours I'll say you you are doing it right like they're coming to LA for the weekend like kicking it off that way with like three super cars and everyone came to pick but the report that like gives you like a boost the whole weekend 100% yeah and I they wanted to see the car and I think it's like gonna be good and honestly I may just go straight out to the clubs with them if they if we like nobody is asking to go to the club I mean imagine they just man did just like on time like 11 look it have gone to Barley's scene Alex's show tonight our front Alex's a roommate Alex's DJing times he go on he goes on a midnight so we won't make it unless we can't work quick he really letting Alex down man dude he's playing such an interesting show it's what is it it's the middle of June yeah he's playing Barley's is having which is one of our popular clubs here in LA they're having a Halloween theme party tonight oh in the middle of June oh I got invited to that how really yeah let's not be doing well so don't go the cancel tickets but that's pretty interesting yeah and that sounds like one of those things that'll be a complete mess or complete hit right like no between I agree people know people will get dressed up well Halloween here is like it's like spiritual yeah speaking of spiritual can I tell you my other vlog goal that I'm really trying to do I really want to go see the Pope oh yeah I heard though I saw that one on the board yeah that'd be really cool and honestly this is my plan and I don't know if it'll send me to hell but I want to rent not rent bar adopt adopt five babies for the day yeah and have five of my friends there and then I'll maximize our chances when the Pope drives by he takes because you know he as he comes by and in his convoy he grabs babies or like a security have you seen this security grabs babies and they bring it to the Pope and the Pope lesses the babies I am scared though if there's like some like Christian ruling that if you bring someone else's kid you go to hell I mean you're just you know you're just to roll I don't think so because you have your kid no you have the opportunity to bless that kid to bless that kid yeah that's a good point yeah that's actually a really good point yeah you're doing a good thing should we bring babies from LA no that's no that's no because everyone in Rome Natalie is obviously go get their baby blessed by themselves so so wait what happened so so the let's say they do he does pick one of your five babies what are you doing you're running up with the camera I'm like he got my baby What if he grabs a baby from that? Yeah. We're going to have to put the baby down because that baby, that baby, that baby can't touch Natalie when it comes back from being blessed because they'll start burning. It's crazy. Because it'll be, it'll go from the hands of the Pope to Lucifer and that kind of just preparation. When, when is the day that this act will act? That kind of juxtaposition will kill the baby on the spot, so we'll have to protect it. It's kind of crazy that Nats have been here since like 10 a.m. and just, just, this into you. This late hour at 10 p.m. talking to you. It's actually crazy. Well, I start peaking this late. Oh, this is when you come out. This is when the good start happens. This is when I go to bed. Prime demon. It's when I go to bed. Prime demon. This is when Natalie's enter. It's really funny how like our, like cycles work. Like, like I or cycles you are like Natalie, you wake up to text from me. Yeah. Like always. Yeah. Like a shit ton of them. Like if I have an idea or something. Yeah. And then I wake up to text from her. Yeah. It's kind of cool. Yeah. Okay, that's 40 texts from Natalie and like 30 different and like four different group chats. Yeah. But I think she gets it the other end, which responds at 7 a.m. You don't respond till 10. Yeah. Yeah. John, do you ever wake up and you're like Dave texted? Are there always texts? No. It's just like Natalie texted. Oh, Natalie texted you? Yeah. Cause she's literally like your hand. I'm like, oh, fuck. I gotta be productive. You say? I heard a rumor about you, John. What? Yeah. Is this true? What? It changed the day of your anniversary. Oh, yeah. What day? Oh, this is real. To what day? Wait, wait. When's your real anniversary? Um, December 22. And what date did you make it? 9/11. Oh my god. This like isn't enough for the pod or it's too much for the pod. We have to talk about this on the vlog. Oh, this just went from pod to vlog. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, this is crazy. 9/11 is the cheapest day to buy a flight and we, we, I said like we should go somewhere. That's so every year. And now you celebrate. Yeah. 9/11. How much difference did prices it? Huge. Really? Really from 9/10 and 9/12? Yes. Huge. Nobody wants to be on a, on a plane. On 9/11. That may be the first. What's huge brother? The craziest life hack. To find huge. Like, like at least 50% to 40% cheaper. Really? Internationally or just nationally? Anywhere. Shut the fuck up. Okay. Okay. Obviously not like internationally, like would be the lowest. But John might be honest. Domestic. Do you feel like a level of guilt though? Like people are mourning the nation. It's probably one of the most sad holidays, not holidays, one of the most events. John's a business. Poor crying events that have ever happened. And you're using it for a coupon to American Airlines. From dusk till dawn, you know what I mean? What the fuck does that mean? It's just like from darkness, you know? Comes light. Anniversary. Huh. And so actually December 22nd is the most expensive time to fly. Terrible. Yeah. We've tried everything and I can't find any deals. So this happened. And it just makes me find any deals. It makes me so mad, Jay. It makes me so mad. Now you might have created a separate problem for yourself, which is it's the holidays you're going to have to travel anyway. You could have lumped everything in. But now you've created a second holiday for yourself. No, think about it. It didn't make sense. I mean, Christmas is like. Well, now they're spreading you go right now. It's like Christmas is really stressful, you know what I mean? Like we have to choose between like going to Chicago or we stay here. Yeah. So it's like, that's, you know, and it's just like, it's not fun. What you do is one year you do her house and the other year you do your house. Again, flights are stupid, expensive or just like anything. But what I'm saying is you've created another day. Where are you going? We have to save our shit. I haven't decided yet. Oh shit. Scan just said got car. Got car. What does that mean? Wait, scan. Can you take a different car? I can just drive the test. Yeah. Which one do you have right now? The blue one. Yeah, because I was going to pull up. It's not we have four people so we can pull up with all of like my main cars. So can you take like the Tesla or something? John, your car? Yeah. Where are you going? You can just take that anyway. John, what other tips do you have for people that are trying to save money? Yeah. Honestly. Yeah. What's like the biggest life hack? You got to get friends and family somewhere. Like be nice to your friends and find a hook up for like hotels, flight, like Delta. Any one that works in an airline? Dude, that's my goal. To find a stand by. To find that works out. Yeah, it gets like stand by flights. Companion. Dude, I used to fly stand by all the time. For what? That's how it flight L.A. I had a friend that worked at the airport and I was put on standby and it sucked sometimes. Yeah. It's a Dyson. It's a Dyson. No, it was like 50 bucks to fly an L.A. It was like something fucking crazy. Really good. It's crazy. It's crazy at the airport for like six hours. Oh yeah. By how many money do you apply to L.A. So it was, yeah. It was definitely worth it. And when you're 18 years old or whatever when I first flew out to L.A., flying to L.A. It's like flying to Mars. Yes. Like it's not easy. It's not easy. It's not easy. It's like taking a private jet now. It's even crazier. It's just landing in L.A. It's like what the fuck? Yeah. You're all dreams come true. I don't know. I thought that part. But yeah. John come on. John, you know that you're, I was, I was talking about in the last podcast that, um, that you make good money in what sense? Well, like you always like to complain that like, you like to cosplay as somebody who's broke, but you're not. You're not anymore. It's very unfortunate. Okay. Am I right? Am I right? Whether you are right or wrong. I don't think it matters. What do you mean? I mean, frugal is, is a lifestyle like, what do you mean? Look at net. That's true. Look at net. Yeah. Me? I don't know about that. I think you are. Like how? Why do you think I'm frugal? Like, I mean, just like, I drive a Ferrari, John. Okay. It's like the least frugal thing ever. Obviously. Yeah, but you didn't, you didn't do that until this year. But like the only thing I remember to you buying before that was obviously you buying a house. I'm going to buy a house for our X amount of time for sure. This was the only year I think that you flexed. Yeah. Why did you start flexing this year, Natalie? What got into you? You got to make videos. You started making videos. You're almost like, you're almost fucking an adult. You know what I'm saying? I did this for you. Think about it. Think about it. And this year a little-- I have my most expensive year. Yeah. This year a little day. I have a lot of people here. You know, she was so good without the videos. She snapped at opening toys off the internet. Monthly budget, 800 USD. It's been on these like, on a slinky. Yeah. They're telling you. Do you afford a Snapchat store? Yeah. Is it about that slinky? Let's go out. Now we got the green hair. In Croatia. No, no, no. But with something really interesting is happening tomorrow. So we recorded this podcast the day before we did what I'm about to say. But we're having a price-pick tournament here. And Jamie Foxx is my partner. Oh wow. Pickleball tournament. Yeah. How crazy is that? It's amazing. I just texted him today. Like, okay. So first of all, I texted him. I was like, are you down to play? I said, hey, it's David. Having a pickleball tournament in my house. On the 19th, if you're interested. And then he took-- And then he-- he only responds in videos, which is kind of crazy. So then this is what he said. Oh man. He goes. Don't drink. Don't you think we would a good time, baby? Oh man. How do we want to get down? Oh man. Thank you for even reaching out. Oh. I'll pull up. Whatever you need, man. Oh. I'm near. All right. Peace. That's so crazy. That's crazy. And I sent that to the chat. I'm like, I think he's coming. And then I texted him the address. And he didn't respond. So then I sent him a video. And then he sends me back a video. And he goes, David. Spid oxen all the way in, baby. All the way in. Yeah. And that silence there is-- Let's go. That silence was him panning the camera from him to the pickleball court. But yeah, I guess he's super in. And then I texted him today just a triple track. And I'm like, I'm like, why do you want to be out there with John? You don't want to be stuck with John as my partner. I love celebrity pickleball tournaments. Yeah. Or like, yeah, because it's always one celebrity. Do you know what I mean? What do you mean? Like Jamie Foxx is like going to be the celebrity. Sure. But like, you don't think it's funny? Not there are other celebrities coming? Yeah. But the title is so grand. Like, it just makes it sound like it's going to be like-- It makes it sound like-- And not the way. It's the star setting. Yeah. Maybe you've been in LA long enough where you like, you don't find that funny. But I always find it so fun. So the word celebrity pickleball tournament. Wait, why are you not getting exactly what I'm saying, you know, John? I bet you're like, yeah, what you're saying. Wait, say it again. Like celebrity pickleball tournament puts so much emphasis on celebrity, right? You think that every person playing is going to be someone notable. Yeah. And some big celebrity. Yeah, but it's like two celebrities. Yeah. And then it's like other random-- And then it's like me and like four other-- You're a big celebrity. Four or eight other influencers. Right. No, I get it. You're saying Jamie Foxx is the only like traditional celebrity. Yeah. You don't think that's crazy? I always think that's so fun. I mean, it just goes back to our conversation this morning, which was just like-- Some people think-- Some people are important, and other people think other people are important. That's not even what I'm saying. I think so. Did you just say Drusky's coming? Yeah, but I think celebrity is like-- That's like arguably the biggest celebrity-- I see what you said. And anyone. I get that. But you're being like-- You're right. And in some sense, but also like-- I think celebrity's still reserved for-- For the OGs. Yeah, like a movie star. Sure, sure, sure, sure. Yeah, yeah. You think that. But my kids don't think that. Really? Yeah. Do you-- I'm sure it would be way more excited about Druski than Do your kids think Charlie D'Amelio is a celebrity? 100%. But do they refer to her? No, no. Okay. And this is where I think we're different. You call them celebrities because that's your golden standard. But do your kids think the word influencer is just as powerful as the word celebrity? Like to your kids saying, "Oh, that's Charlie D'Amelio. She's an influencer." Is probably the equivalent of you saying, "That's Jamie Foxx, the celebrity." But in their world, influencer carries a higher name or maybe a higher standard than you saying celebrity. I don't know. Whenever I talk to kids, they just think that influencers' celebrities it's all the same thing. Yeah, that's crazy. I really do. You know, we grew up in a different. Even you and I, even with our age difference, like you remember. We're really getting a lot closer though. We're pretty close in age now. We're moving our same way though. It's not like that. Yeah, but I don't wear a rhinestone sweatshirts. Yeah. Did you borrow that from Olivia Jade? I wish she'd let me borrow her clothes. I'll be in a tube top right now. No, I'm wearing my rhinestone sweatshirt because we're convoying. So I wore my two-sheet outfit for this experience. I think my mom is a jacket like that. No, I actually love this. This jacket I got from this random guy that pulled up to me in traffic and threw it at me. Yeah. He was like, "This is my design. You need to wear it." And I never get a chance to wear it. It's baby blue with one. Do you guys think it's cool? Or do you think it's wack? I think it's cool. It's just not very you. But do you not think I'm pulling it off right now with how I look? No. Oh, fucks. Every time I wear it. Brother, you look like you're at like a Costco. You know when the first time I wear it. Like a six-year-old woman wears that. You know what day I wore it too for the first time? Where? Or where? To disclose your day. Okay. I had such high hopes for the movie. I was like, "I gotta dress up." And I was like, "You've been looking greatly." Like I really like your outfits. I see you when you're in Monaco or you're on the yacht. Really? Thank you so much. Yeah, like I like that long sleeve polo you wear. Natalie's texting Taylor on the side or buying me outfits. You think he's got bad clothes? No, no. No, no. I can just like, he needs to keep it up. I see. Taylor went shopping for me today. What was I going to say? We just saw Toy Story. Put that on your close friend's story and take a poll. This outfit? Yeah. Just the jacket. I want to see what people say. Dude, I took a poll yesterday. I said, "Guys, I have about 125 people on my close friends. Can you guys tell me how many you have?" Yeah. And listen to these votes. This is crazy. I share like Doc some of these people and say how many they each have? No, no. I shouldn't. But majority of 46% of my close friends that voted have zero to 50 close friends. Wow. Okay. That's crazy. I mean, that makes sense. Only 3% have over 200 and only 10% have over 100. That's kind of crazy. I thought it was like, gonna be for sure everybody was, I don't know, I guess. By definition, close friends would make you think that it would be a pretty small number. You're under 50. Do you know who is the only person that is over 200 plus close friends? Diplo. Zayn and Josie. Oh, really? No way. He has over 200. Yeah. Oh. And Natalie, you're one of four that have over 100. But I use mine for like business. I use my clothes. So you guys try to reach a lot of people? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no. I ask, am I a whore and now looks like I'm a fucker. Does that actually do anything? Close friends is incredible. You need a couch sold. Immediately, I can put it on there. It's gone. Great. And I'll do the script. Anything. That's got five couches. Okay. Let me tell you some counts. You want to set courts at the Lakers game tomorrow? Yeah, I do. Close friends. But I'm so confused when I see your close friends. Like, you'll put something funny up on close friends. Yeah. And then I'm like, why the fuck isn't this going up to everyone? Yeah, I get that. And it's not like it's. It's just like a funny joke you make. And I'm like, oh, that's really funny. Because it's like. I think I've been doing this so long. Trying to be elusive. Where it's more rewarding to get like. It's fun to look at like. You're actual. The people that you know look at your stories. Otherwise, you can't see them. Yeah. It goes back to like when I was in high school. And I put up a story. And I'm like, didn't my crush like it? Or did this celebrity I'm into like it? Or whatever. Like, it just goes back to those days. And you just kind of feel like you're like literally just posting. Like in your high school days. I guess. So that's why I love it. Very more validating. Yeah. I'm so tired of. Do you ever like go around L.A.? I thought I would like try to paint the picture for people that don't live in L.A. Like, some of the bad parts of L.A.? Like, people, everyone's just so crazy here. Like, I went to Sprouts the other night. And like, I like literally risked my life to get cookies. Because there's just like a crazy person. Oh yeah, dude. Almost got tackled. Yeah. Big five, yeah. What was happening? People were crazy. And he was running and I was like. At Big Five? At Big Five, yeah. Are Big Five? Studio City? Yeah, right here. Yeah. I was. I had to wait for a guy to help me pick up the pig punk table. And I was just exiting. And I was chewing gum. Like just. I was like, wow. What a beautiful sunset. And this guy just. (laughter) And it's not your shot. And I just get like shoved. Like, and I just turn around. And I just see these guys. Like, they put the entire like. You know, those things that have like a bunch of like sunglasses and stuff. It's just like. He threw it down. Oh, you actually went into the whole shoplifting. Yeah. Oh, it's crazy. Oh, yeah. You said in the group chat that you almost got tackled. That's like. That's like not as. That's like the most normal LA thing ever. But this is like such a cool story. You got. You saw a shoplifting happen? Yeah. Did you stop it? I just. I looked at him and I looked back at the sun again. (laughter) You looked at him and then you looked up at the big five logo and you were like, this is a big corporation. (laughter) They could take it. I mean, he. I mean, he booked it. He booked it. What did he take sunglasses? I don't know. I mean, he just. He just grabbed a bunch of stuff and he just dropped like half of it. I mean, it's in Spider-Man, by the way. Huh? The cell uncle Ben dies. 'Cause Spider-Man let the shoplifters go. The bank robbers go. But I didn't know. I was like. I don't know if your family in town? No. Good. Yeah. The chances of them being dead are. have now gone to zero, which is nice. It's not even just. It's not even just like criminals or homeless people like. It's just crazy people. Yeah. Like I was hiking today. And there's a guy who hikes and run in. And he's been there for a few years. And he's like. He's like six-four ball guy. He's so jacked. He's so strapped. Sure. And he carries a chain around his neck. Like the kind of chain. Not like a gold chain. Like a chain that would be attached like a wrecking ball. It's like a 50-pound chain that he carries with him and swings around. Have you seen him? No. I don't know why this feels like I've seen this before, but I can imagine. He's out of his fucking mind. And he. He sounds like he sounds like Mr. Hanky from South Park. He's like, "Oh, hello." Is he crazy? He's fucking nuts. And so then I saw him today. I had seen him in like a year. And I'm at a part in the hike where there's no one around. It's really treacherous. And if I take one wrong step on the hike, I gotta go really slow. I'll throw my back out or whatever. And so then I see him. And he's like, "Oh, not going too fast today." He's just so fucking ominous. Dude, hiking is so interesting. And I like, 'cause if you do it enough, you see the same people. Over and over again. Yeah, I see the same people. Same people. I see the lead singer of "Tears for Fears" every day. Really? Yeah. Like at Run-Yent, you probably know this guy. Did you go to Run-Yent? Yeah, at Run-Yent, yeah. There's this guy that only runs it backwards. Oh, I haven't seen him. Oh, my God. He runs it backwards. I'll kill. The entire thing. He's only doing it backwards constantly. When I used to go with Ernst, we would see him every time. How is that like 12 years ago? Yeah, but Jason's been around for so long. I thought maybe he fucking raised that kid to be honest. Great sweatshirt, man. Well, sorry. I forgot to say this. The Pope. Why I want to see him. Okay. It's because he's, first of all, he's from Chicago. Yeah. Super cool, dude. Fucks with aliens. No. But does he, he's now learned 6-7? Have you seen this? He is. So not any time kids are like 6-7ing him. He does it back with his hands. Yeah. I think that's so cool. Maybe you give you a 6-7. Yeah, with his rhinestone jacket. I don't get, I don't. You think the Pope's tired? No. What? Really? Not at all. Not at all. I think you're the Pope. You've got to be, probably gets a nice drink. Does he drink? Eight hours. No. Wait, the Pope doesn't drink. No. They're absent for anything. Wait, really? The Pope can't, but he drinks wine. The blood of Christ. What do you think he can do? He can't. He doesn't take shots. Definitely does not take shots. A glass of wine thing, you're right. I don't know. Like, would he do it like recreation? I used to be so baffled by the fact that my priest didn't. Wasn't a lot of sex with women. Yeah. When I was like 15 or 14, it blew my mind. There was the priest lived right next to the church. Yeah. And I'd watch him go home. Like we were in the car. Like my siblings would be playing at the park. And I'd watch him walk home. Every time. I would just stare at him in disbelief. I'd be like, what's he going to go do? And I wasn't even like, I didn't even know about sex at the time. But I was just so confused. I was like, is he just going to go inside and read the Bible? Is this a Libertyville one? Yeah. Do you know how they walk across the street? They walk home. Yeah. I just thought about priesthood before. I was just like, no. Really? It's an interesting lifestyle. Yeah. Did you see that guy? I'm going to completely fuck up worries from him. But that guy who's been standing for 12 years. No. Oh my gosh. Oh, with his feet. Like. How does he sleep? He leans. So he leans on this like rocking thing. But his feet are completely purple. And he's made. made a vow to keep standing until he gets this vision from the whoever the God is that he like worships. But his feet are completely purple and they have to come and apply it, wait a minute. It's not like his feet look like the elephant feet. Yeah, like it's just so inflamed. It's so it's, they're black, they're completely flamed. It's like, it doesn't look like any part of his body. - Is this person? No, no, no, no, wow. But yeah, it's pretty crazy. I've seen those Indians would just just raise their right hand. - I wanna keep that hand up. - Yeah, and it's just like completely atrophied. It's like skinny. - Wait, for how long? - Ever. For like years, years. - They keep their right hand up. - Yeah, they just keep like one of their hands up. One of them, not the other. - But what reason? - Religion. - Religion. - Yeah. - There's gotta be, dude, religion's crazy. - Yeah. - There's gotta be one of them that's like the closest, right? - Would you get a calling? - You can follow it. - It's go, religion. I'm like, yeah, but. - Like what are you saying? - It's like, you guys are so much smarter than me. - Dude, would you, would you, would you. - Religion. - I actually thought that when I said it. - And I was like, obviously a religion, but I was looking for a little bit more. - Dude, when I said more, the second it came out, I was like, I wonder if this is gonna work. (all laughing) I was like, I wonder if I'm gonna get away with this. - Maybe he does that, Jackass. - If he will tell me something like a fact, and she'll start in, and then I'll go, yeah, and, she'll go, well, that's all I know. - Yeah, I mean, I'm pretty notorious for like, giving the most half-ass facts ever. - Right. - But yeah, religion. - Yeah, religion, I agree. - I get it. - Do you think there's one religion that's closer than the others? Or do you think they're all kind of similar? - I don't know. - As long as it doesn't hurt people, like, I mean, I think they're all equal. - If you had a rank one. - S tier. - A tier. - B tier. (all laughing) - I'm so not into religion. - I'm so not into religion. - Really? - Yeah. - I'm so not into it. - I was thinking about you the other day. Can you explain that to me? Why? I saw a TikTok. I'm a Christian Catholic. I don't know what the difference is, but I believe in Jesus. - Yeah. - And I saw this TikTok the other day that was like, just basically no one believes in any kind of religion, and then they're born and it's kind of like fed to them. Like they're taught it. I just don't get, I don't get why people have such a stick up their ass about being atheists. Like, is it just easier to believe in something? - No. - It's hard to believe in something. - But why? Like, you're here for a reason. Like, I'm not trying to be one of those guys that knocks on your door right now, but like, I'm knocking. Why? - It's like saying not believing in ghosts. Like, it's harder not to believe in ghosts. - But it's not real. Like, there's nothing like, there's no like, factual evidence that's like-- - Yeah, but you're here, is there not like, fact enough? - Yeah. - They're like, something's going on. Like, whether, because you've presented a million different scenarios to me in other than religion. Like, you yourself, who is, I guess, some are religious, but you've also said to me, oh yeah, we're in a simulation and none of us are here. - Sorry, sorry, sorry. - What the fuck, but to me, if we are in a simulation. - Right. - Whatever the fact is, it all leads to higher power. And that is what I, when I pray, that is what I'm praying to. - But I believe in higher power. I just think there's elements of religion that are not, is his name, Jesus Christ? I don't know. But like, is the, like, I pray to the idea of a person that's like kind of like the caretaker, that's like the thing that you're supposed to emulate, to be a better person and all this stuff. Like, I believe in that. - But you also said that we're living in a simulation, so those are two different things. - I don't think so. - Which one is it? - Oh, you should see the disclosure date, actually. Kind of touches on this, I feel like. You told me not to see it. - Yeah. The disclosure date touches on the fact that a lot of Christians are like, there can't be, there can't be aliens. - Yeah. - 'Cause we're like, chosen. - Yeah, we're like the people. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - But like, that doesn't mean anything. 'Cause basically what just, it's basically how it ends is like, yeah, there are aliens. - Yeah. - There's also God. Same, same. - Yeah. - I think that's, that's pretty easy to like unpack, no. - Like you just said. - No, I just feel like there's two different things. You should feel like Mopey and like discouraged. Like, there's nothing out there. I'm just gonna die and then like, doesn't that make you feel like a loser? (laughing) - I'm not trying to hate on atheism. 'Cause like, more power. - I'm not an atheist either. - Or whatever you are, boring. More power to you for like not believing into something, but like. - So, but like, you want me to believe in something? - Yeah, anything. - I mean, I believe in everything. I believe in so many things. - Oh, aren't you Jewish? Don't you believe in me? - Yeah, I'm Jewish, yeah. - So you have a belief there, no? - Yeah, a belief. - I don't, I don't go to temple. I don't, I don't like pray to God. I'm not gonna look up in the sky and be like. - Do you want to try Christianity with me? (laughing) - Oh my God. I know this is where you're going. I know you're gonna be the biggest fucking Christian person when you're like 50. You're gonna be so interreligion. Yeah, you are. You're gonna marry somebody Christian and it's gonna be really, really interesting. - No, no, no, 'cause I'm like pretty like, no. I mean, obviously I can say that I'm not a man. - I love pussy, man, I can never. - Can't be that priest walking home alone. Walking home in nothing? No way. No, no, no, I also think there's, I also think like people can be like, really overbearing with the religion. And like, I think that tears a lot of people away. - Yeah. - I don't know what, let me think about it for a second. I just don't believe it. - Okay. - You know what I mean? Like I'm just like, are you religious John? - A little bit, a little bit, for sure. - Now are you? - No, no. - What, you don't believe in anything either? - I don't know, I-- - 'Cause I'm a demon or a member, I don't know if it's that, but you still should have like Lucifer or somebody. - Yeah, you're right. - And the piece that I'm boring, and the piece that I'm boring because I don't, I can believe in it. - I just think it's like-- - God. - Actually, I do think it's boring. It's like you don't have like any, like there's gotta be something. - You think going to church is exciting? - No, that's not what I'm saying. - I just like only equate religion to like church or like temple or something, and that, I don't really-- - See, I don't do that 'cause I don't like church. I never understood church. I was like, if God is real, can I just talk to him? - Yeah, but the thing is like, my whole thing is that, okay, let's say that I believe in Jesus or something. Like, if you believe in a certain aspect, don't you just believe in the whole fucking thing? And I don't believe it. I don't think I follow the whole thing. - Like, you're saying like you don't believe like, like certain stories, like Moses parting the red sea. - Yeah, I think it's like 40 days before you answer, yeah. - Okay. - And it's like, if you're believing in 10, if you're buying into 10%, and you might as well be buying into the other 90, you know? - Okay, but like, I don't, I also don't think that there were, like, I don't necessarily think that there were like, these superhumans doing crazy things, but that doesn't change what that is trying to, fucking sound like a preacher. That doesn't change the fact that what that's trying to teach us, right? Like, just like watching a video or watching a movie. Like, there's a message, right? And isn't that like the same thing in this story? Like, real or not? Like, the story of Moses, the story of David, whatever, like, aren't they all just messages? Like, no matter whether or not they were real, doesn't it just all lead to like, just be a better person, be a good person? And then, and then I think there's one North Star and that's, is it an alien? Is it a computer? Is it a piece of bread? Is it a flower? Whatever that is, it's name in my head is God. - Yeah, I just, I just have a bad taste in my mouth about religion 'cause it's just like, it seems to be like lord or over people. It seems to be, you take advantage of people, preachers, take advantage of people. - Yeah, I don't like that. - Stuff like that, it's just like, - I don't think, it's just like power over people. - I don't love that. - Being religious makes you a better person. - I mean, I think, like-- - I don't think it does anything, but I'm just saying like, I just, I find it easier to go through life. - Yes. - Sure. - Having a belief. - You have a, you have hope. - Yeah. - Yeah. - And it's just like somebody to be like, "Yo, shout out, shout out to you for this full hollow." - Yeah. (laughs) - You gotta be fuckin' get it out of my mouth. - You did not just bring this back to your ball hollow. (laughs) That's crazy. - Tonight I'm gonna go to bed. I'm like, thank you for letting me convoy. (laughs) - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. - You had so many like Catholic people on your side for the last 10 minutes. - Well, then you just really, I gotta bring it back. You're bringing it back through that. That's actually the point of my sermon today. - I see. - It's like, just sprinkle in. - Yeah. - Sprinkle in the Jesus godly vibes. - Yeah. - I don't know. I fuck with whoever. I love all religions. I fuck with all of it. - I wanted to be Jewish when I was like middle school. - Why'd you want to be Jewish? - 'Cause they lived in the bigger houses. - Yeah. - No, I'm standing. (laughs) - Oh my God, I wanted to be Jewish so bad. - Dude. (laughs) - Fuck this was about me. - Yeah, it was about me. - It was about me. - It was about me. - It was about me. - It was about me. Oh, I got this today. I got this today for two weeks straight. I hear about it. - I hear about it today. - If they were Christian. - I get one day. - No, no, no, no, no. But John, all those 'cause we're so rich that they would also still get 10 presents on Christmas. - Yeah, yeah. - There was no way around them. - They were getting stocks, like, I don't remember getting stocks. - Stocks. - I'm fucking getting a piece of paper. - We got these stocks. - Oh my gosh. - Oh, dude. - That's so funny. - Listen, well, I think it's almost time for us to go con, boy. - No. - Oh, Jay, I also saw Toy Story today. - Oh yeah, how was it? - It's the fucking best. - You liked it. - It's so good. - But we're so good about it. - So good. - David was in tears. - I'm gonna go see you. - You're crying at him, like. - You didn't look at me. - That's good. - Yes, I was looking at you. - Really? - You were wiping the tears out your fucking face. - I wanna know what made you cry, which parts? was Toys vs. Tax. Toys vs. Tax, and a lot of it is like, well it's first off it's amazing to see the characters that you grew up on like Woody and Buzz and a lot of the jokes with Woody are like he's gotten older, like he's a gut now, he's bald, and all of it, all of the entire movie is Toys, I'm not gonna try spoiling, is Toys vs. Tax, and it's not just one tech piece, it's like the evolution of tech, so it's like from like corded phones to phones to computers to like little digitized like games like everything in tech, and it's just like a really really good story, and it's really pretty, the characters are really good, and it's so original, it's like, it's original, it's just it feels so good, it's so nice, I don't know how to explain, and the whole premise of it, what is that, I'm so bad at explaining shit, well it's just hard to like, not spoil it, no no no you're gonna keep going, the whole premise of it which is really interesting is that Bonnie who's a girl in it, she like can't make friends, it's all about her making friends, and it's hard for her to make friends because she's kind of an old soul, she wants to, I don't know, that's the difficult one, anyway, it's really hard not to spoil it, I'm trying to talk around, anyway, the whole takeaway from it is to play, play more, less technology, right, you can see that in the trailer, this is really crazy, this is what happened when we were walking out, Julia heard this, and she couldn't have made it up because she told us right away, there was a group of kids that were walking out, like 10 kids, they were like on, like they were with their camp counselor, yeah camp counselor kids, and they're all had like little blue shirts on, so like you don't lose them or whatever, oh by the way we were surrounded by all the kids, I've never been to the theater that was actually full of kids, it was like kids like, to the left and right of us going, like making the craziest fucking sound, and you want to say something, but you realize that you shouldn't be there, you might say it was kids, like the entire time, they kept turning around, but then I saw the guy, the kid had headphones, I'm like, oh fuck, I can't say anything, so, and as these kids are walking out of their camp counselor, one of the kids is like, wait hold on, what if we miss something at the end of the credits, and the camp counselor goes just Google it, and the kid goes, did you now watch the movie, oh my god, we're not supposed to use our electronics as much, fucking crazy, whoa, like what are the chances of that, like interaction happening, right, I hope that camp counselor had his fucking mind blown, you couldn't have written that better, just Google it, yeah, didn't you watch the movie, a fucking eight year old saying that to you, I don't know, that's like, that's like, that's what kids are like, they do, they say stuff like that too, is it crazy, how much do they stop you in your tracks, that is kind of cool, kids are good at that show, yeah, they stop you in your tracks, like, whoa, those are the kids we should take to the Pope, yeah, like one time I tried to park in a handicap space, and my kids flipped out, wow, oh my god, yeah, kids are, you can't, kids are true, yeah, so true, this reminds me of a movie, which I don't think, I don't know what it has to do with this, but I haven't given a movie recommendation in like a minute, go watch Mr. Nobody, that's a good one, really, Mr. Nobody, yeah, where is that, Jared Leto, Mr. Nobody, what's about, unlock something in my head, yeah, one of the lines get kid, oh, made it, yeah, he said all those top five movies, yeah, it's a great movie, it's about in it, dude, it's really hard to explain, I think it's this guy who lives five different lives, okay, it's the same guy, but it's what would happen if he lived these five different lives, and the reason I just came up with this is because I'm talking about kids, and there's a scene where the kids are born, you know that like little part between your mouth, that's like where your lips come together and they're like indented, it's like no kid has that until an angel like basically pushes you out of heaven, and they touch that part of your lip and it causes a little indent in your lip, and I always think about that for somebody when I look at people's lips, I'm like oh, you can't even have it, you're not a cleft, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, you're talking about a cleftion, or a cleft lip, a cleft lip, no, no, no, I'm talking about like what you have in your mouth right now, right here, this, this little part, yeah, that's from what's that angel, oh, okay, it's called the angel lesson, I don't make anything sad, but go watch this for nobody, let me know what you guys think, download my new sermons, let me know if you guys want more, yeah more god talk on the pod, we'll see you guys for the next one, bye bye.