Dating Asian Orange

- Hey guys, I'm on tour, Australia-style. Shrimp on Bobby. August 14th in Melbourne at the MCEC, is I'm gonna be playing, great venue. August 20th in Sydney at the Darling Harbor Theater. August 22nd in Brisbane at the BCEC. And August 23rd in Auckland, New Zealand at the Bruce Mason Center. Tickets at bobbylee.live. Everybody, we got new shirts! - We got the shirts, baby! - Go to BadFriendsMerch.com. - BadFriendsMerch.com, you're gonna get yourself this in black or red. - Red! - Black or red, go see us at BadFriendsMerch.com. Go grab yourself a shirt. - You two are bad friends! - Who are these two idiots? - A white dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. - A you two or something. - We're bad friends. - You know, I gotta tell you something, I've been watching more soccer than ever now. - Good. - It's blown my mind how much soccer I'm watching. - What's blown your mind about it? - That I'm interested in it. - Yeah, it's very interesting. - Only when it's on TV. - Oh, you can't see clips. - I watch the game, but I don't wanna engage in all the nuance. - Yeah, I was at the Wii Spa last night, I saw the Mexico game. - Yeah, I watched the Mexico game from the hotel. - And there's a lot of Mexican people that work at Wii Spa that went, "Eek!" - Yeah. - I go, "Pick up the towel." - Pick up the towel. - Yeah, like, "What are we doing here?" - How do you say "ape" in Spanish? How do you say "ape"? - Mono, that is not a bad word. - Mono. - Mono. - Mierde de mono. - Mierde de mono. - They went, "Mierde de mono." - They went, "Mierde de mono, mierde de mono." Pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam. Mierde de mono. - Yeah, yeah. - Mierde de mono. Pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam, pam. I'm late. I was late on that. - You were late. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm literally looking at the towels at Wii Spa. None of them are done. - All right. - No, let's get this off my chest, right? - All right. - And everyone is watching the game. - Yeah, they're watching the game. - Yeah, yeah. Do the towels first. - No, they can't do the towels. Look at those guys. They were losing their mind. I watched the news. I was in Northern California, and they were talking about riots in LA, in North Hollywood. I loved it. They were doing donuts. They were breaking stuff. - Every time there's a Mexico game, you can tell. - You can tell there's a Mexico. Look at that guy. He's got Agent Orange on his face. I don't know what that is, but that's how they celebrate. - It's just asbestos. He just came from work. - Yeah. - That was in North Hollywood. That was at like Van Nuys, they said. - That's insane. - Pacoima, yeah. - Is it Pacoima? - Yeah. - But you know who they play next? - Who? - Mexico. - Who do they play? - Sunday, England. - Oh, yeah. - Oh, it's over. - Let's see what happens. - Yeah, it's over then. - Let's just see what happens. - Although this pod will already be out by the time this happens. So, wow, wow, what a game. - What a wonderful game. Mexico won. - It was cool to see Messi. I'll say that. That was cool to see. - Yeah, I know. - Greatest ever touch of soccer. - He's 40. - And he's still fucking shit up. - I know, he's great, he's great, he's great, he's great. He's one of the greatest of all time. - No, no, he's the greatest. - It goes Messi, Maradona, I know them all. - He's the best. - Yeah. - He's undoubtedly, every soccer player ever has said he's the greatest. - Yeah, he is. You have Zinedine Zidane, you got-- - Zinedine Zidane. - Yeah, you got all those guys. But my point though is, he is, but he is 40, okay? - Can you imagine me on a soccer field? That's crazy to play with. He's playing with 19 year olds. - I know. - And he's cooking them. - He's 40 years old, how does he do this? - He's just born that way. - I love when they cut to his wife, they go, "And Miss Messi loves it as well." She's bouncing up and down, having the time of her life. I will say this about his wife, and I mean this. - Beautiful. - Very unattractive. - Well, no! - No, she's so gorgeous, dude. - You know what they're called? - The hottest couple in the world? - No, they're called wags. - Wives and girlfriends, yeah, yeah, the wives and girlfriends. - Oh, you know? - Yeah, wags are in all sports. - Oh, I thought that was only soccer. - There's wags in basketball? - Baseball, baseball too. - Oh, really? - Look at his body. - Yeah. - Gee. - Look at that body. - Jiminy Christmas. - Jiminy, yeah. His legs, they don't even show his legs. - Can you imagine the sex that they get to have? How fun. - I've never imagined that. - Ugh, how fun. - Tell me how good is it? - I'd love to just, I'd love to cuck that. - Yeah, how big is his balls? Like a soccer ball? - I guarantee he has tiny little balls. - No. - No, because when you're running a lot, your balls gotta get-- - If I was him, I would make my balls look like soccer balls. - Paint your-- - Get tattoos. - Yeah, paint your-- - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Argentina won, and the other one, Miami. - Yeah. - FC. Miami, FC. - Baseball? - Yeah, yeah. You know what I love about it too is that Korea's out. - Korea's way out. - And when they landed in Seoul, did you see the airport? Right? People were there going, "You're a loser!" "You're a disgrace!" - That's great. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They fucking shamed, people were screaming, you know what I mean? - Wow. - Yeah. - They're met with insults? - Insults and-- - And harassment? - Harassment. - Wow, that's so sad. - Look, wait, wait, pause. - They motivate you for next time. - That's the coach's nose. Do you know why his nose is that long? - Is he a liar? - He's a liar. - He's a liar? - Yeah. - What did he lie about? - I gotta tell you something. This is awful. - No, I think it's good. - These guys, they worked so hard. - It doesn't matter. - The World Cup was ruined because of you, one person just said. - Yeah, I know. - The World Cup was ruined. - Ruined, and it was ruined. - No, it was-- - It was ruined for Koreans! - Nobody thought the Koreans were gonna go far. - Dude, we have Sun, right? We have one guy from the Wolverham Wanderers. Forget his name. - Look, they won't even show his face. - They won't even show the face! It's, for Koreans, it's a disgrace. All right, and what I'm gonna say as a Korean, we do good film. - Good film. - Good film. - Good food. - Good food. - Right? Samsung, Hyundai, right? Get to the fucking knockout stages! That's all we ask! - You didn't do it. - Yeah, if you lost against Argentina, if you lost against France-- - Fine. - Fine! - Fine. - Right? - That's right. - But who do they, they lost against Mexico. - Yeah, Mexico's good, though. - I know, but it was the goalkeeper's fault. The coach hired him. - Oh, so it's the coach's fault. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, so what my point is is that I think there isn't enough shaming going on. - More shame. - Yeah, yeah. - I think more shame, you know what I mean? And let me tell you something. I think that if the USA lose-- - Shame. - No, they don't get to go to a Cracker Barrel. - Ever again? - For five years. - Oh my God, that's a long time. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, there should be consequences. - There must be. - Costco, Cracker Barrel, what else? Walmart, you're not allowed to go in. Those are American things. - No more A.M.P.M. - No more A.M.P.M., no more of that, right? You get shamed. - Shame. - Pulsenic. - No, I think it's right for certain cultures. Koreans, yes, sure. - Yes, yes, you have to shame. - But Americans here, you know, soccer isn't our thing. If it was a world football, American football thing, yes, I think we should shame them. - And Germany lost. - You know what's going on with them. - Yeah. - Right on, back to-- - And when Germany goes back to fucking, you know what I mean? Germany, they should go to Auschwitz. - Yeah, they have to. Hit the trains. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, you betrayed your people. They should go to Auschwitz. - They have to. - Yeah, like at least a year. Okay, not death, right? But like-- - You know what I mean? - Hang out there. - Right, you lost to what, Paraguay? - Yeah. - Who did they lose to, Paraguay, right? Here's another, Netherlands lost. - Netherlands did lose. - Yeah, who did they lose against? Morocco, Morocco. Where did the Netherlands go? - Where are they not allowed to go? - Yeah, when they go back to the Netherlands, the shaming ritual, what should it be? No brothels for a year. - I was gonna say, for them, it'd be being around any minority whatsoever. - Yes. - 'Cause the Netherlands is like all white, they don't let any minority-- - Yeah. - Anybody in? - I think shaming is lost in the World Cup. - We need more shame. - I think we need more shame. You have, 'cause if Korea knew that they were gonna fly back to Seoul, right, and get attacked like that, I think they would've won. - Yeah, maybe. - I think maybe. - It would've helped. - They would have rung a little more. - They would've ran a little bit more. - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think there needs to be more shaming in the World Cup. - I agree, now you got me on your team. I think-- - Do you really? - High shame, high shame. - Yeah, yeah, if you're fucking Russian, right? - Yeah. - You lose, you go into Gulag. - Let me tell you something. - Yeah. - If Russia, yeah. - I don't think they're in it. - They will get killed. I think they do get murdered. - Yeah, yeah. - I'm not even kidding. - Yeah. - I think they actually do, I think. - Because I'll tell you what, and this is the truth, okay? When North Korea lost to 8-1, I think it was against Portugal. - Oh yeah. - Do you remember that? - And they said they won? - They said they won, but every player and the coach went into manual labor after that for a year. They had to move rocks. They went to a mining, they went to a mining facility. - Saddam Hussein did it with Iraq. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's, those are, I think that's fair. - So what did he do? He suffered brutal treatment of poor performances. His son, Uday Hussein, who headed the Iraqi Olympic Committee, reportedly tortured in prison and beat national soccer players and coaches following embarrassing losses or failure to qualify for major tournaments. - We gotta bring that back. - We gotta go back. Uday Hussein. - Yeah. - Uday Hussein. - Yeah, yeah. What do you think? - Handsome guy. - Yeah. So if the USA loses, what do you think? - Yeah, I think we do need to shame and beat them. - Yeah. Not beat them. - No. - We don't do that in this country. - Why not? - What? That's right. - Why not? - Why not? - Why not? - You know what? Guantanamo Bay. - Get down there. - Yeah, you gotta get down there, right? 'Cause people have been imprisoned for less. - For way less. - Yeah. You are representing your country. - Best country in the world. - You're representing your country. Millions of people rely. - They need this. - They need it, dude. In this economy, what's that? - That's a soccer player who didn't do well. - Yeah, yeah. He didn't do well. Yeah, yeah. - That was the World Cup, yeah. - He's like, "I was on the bench. I didn't play one second." Doesn't matter. - Doesn't matter. - You go to fucking Guantanamo Bay. - How many soccer players? - Look at it. That's right now the South Korean soccer team. And they have to sit like that all day. They sit like that. And guess what? When you do that, the next World Cup, they get to the fucking final. So do they have to sit like that for four years until the next World Cup? They'll get a new crop of players. But what you do is you get the new crop of players and you show them what happened to the old crop of players. Yeah. Look at this gulag. Propaganda. Do you remember him? He was the forward for our team. One of the best in the world. In the best of the world. Now he's a rock monster. This is what happens to you. I did watch. I'm catching up on Margo Has Money Problems. Oh. Elle Fanning show. Good. No, it's not good. It's amazing. I think it's incredible. It's well done. She is such a good actress. Nick Offerman is phenomenal. And the Fife Dog. It's a great show, dude. But I will say Elle Fanning carries this show in a way where I'm like every time she's on camera, I'm like, oh, she's the best. She's so good. She delivers the lines. You believe every second of her character. I found her to be extraordinary. Extremely beautiful. She is. I know, but like extra. She's so good in the show. Like if I was on an island, right, and there was 10 women of the hottest women, right, and she was one of them, and they said, you have to, I don't know why I'm making this up, but like. You're sitting on an island. Right? It's probably, you guys probably shared the fantasy. Not an island, a peninsula. Even better. Is that better? Sure. We're on a peninsula. On a key. You're on a key. In a key. Okay, good. A key. Is that fine? Yes. Yeah, I'm in a key. A key. A key, right? A key. Right? I think I would choose her over the nine other beautiful women. Wow. Yeah. Who are the other nine? I don't know. Just think of the most nine most beautiful women in the world. Done. Yeah. Margot Robbie. Over her. Over her. Gal Gadot. Over. Not because of the look. You know I set it up. Yeah. I set it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. How about you in a key? Me in a key. You're not with your wife anymore. And I'm on a key with a love. She sadly passed away. Nine. Did you kill her? No. Nine beautiful women. Ten beautiful women. Ten beautiful women. Yeah, yeah. Who am I picking? Yeah, who are you picking? This is how Facebook has started. Kind of. Kind of. I think this is kind of how Facebook started. Hot or not. Right. Can I be honest with the group? I just. And I don't want anyone to go. No, you're wrong. I think I'm in an honesty. I'm in an honesty phase with myself. I know. The gold rings are doing something for you. Right. So I'm in an honesty phase to myself. Let's just be truthful. Okay. Okay. Okay. I'm ugly. No. Yeah. See, see, see that. See. No. I'm ugly. Okay. Okay. By every metric. Of handsome. I do not. I do not hit. No, that's not. Yeah. Yeah. That 100%. Jawline. You have no jawline. Yeah, exactly. Right. Height. You're very tiny. Okay. In every metric. And then people go, oh no, but you're cute. Yeah. Little boo-boos are cute. You wouldn't fuck them. You wouldn't fuck a little boo-boo. Okay. But how about this? Yeah. Yeah. Obviously you're incorrect because you have a girlfriend who's very pretty. It's clout. It's clout. Fame. That's it. That's it. You think if you had none of those things. Nope. She would never be with you. Hell no. Hell no. And why can't I be, right? Yeah. No. No flags. No. No. But why can't people just be honest with themselves? I don't think you're ugly. Yeah. Yeah. I am ugly. You're like an artist though. You're like a stinky cheese. People still like that. Yeah. Yeah. That's worse. All right. I'm blue cheese. Not everyone's going to get like that. I'm Gorgonzola. I'm Gorgonzola. I'm Gorgonzola. But my point though being is. Why can't. Why can't we be honest with ourselves? You. I think you're. I think. Listen. Okay. I'm ugly. You're not ugly. And I'm fine with it. Okay. I have other attributes. Right. Yeah. But in the marketplace. If I wasn't who I am. Okay. I don't like this. I know you don't like it. I'm fine with it. Why? Why are you saying this? Because it's the truth. Did you look in the mirror and have like some thing. I was staring at myself in the mirror. Yeah. At the spa. You finally cleaned them. Yes. You're a meanie weenie today. Yeah. Me so mean. All right. And I looked at myself and I objectively said, yeah, I'm pretty ugly. No. Okay. Then give me, give me the counter. You are in great. I'm talking about physically. You're in great shape for a man of your age. Most men in your age range are not in your shape. That's true. You look average weight. Okay. I have a 54 year old who's five foot three. You have to say man to Korean, Korean, Korean male. All right. An average weight of a 54 year old Korean, 53 year old, 54 year old Korean. Yeah. It's 112 to 136 pounds. I weigh one 55. So I'm fat. You're not fat. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'm a fatter than the average. No, I don't believe that. Yeah. Well, it's we, you're going to refute AI. I'm not saying this in a negative way. I have high self-esteem. It's not from AI. It's from the Trong Tam Teo Dong Cardiff. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And that's the best fucking center for that. It is. Yeah. Yeah. The Kronk Factor is the best for that. Okay. Look at, look at the statistics here. I can't read that map at all or that, whatever that is. Right. But let's just be honest with ourselves. Okay. I'm ugly. You're not ugly. Okay. Well, give me, you haven't given me any other fucking, give me, give, give it to me. From a physical standpoint, you have nice eyes. You got great hair. If I was, if I let, let, let's, okay, I'm 55 years old. I'm working at Chipotle, but not even in the front counter. You're cooking. You know, I'm in the back washing dishes. Oh, wow. Okay. I'm making 1250 an hour. Yeah. Nothing wrong with that. All right. Yeah. I mean, I have to, I have no vehicle. Okay. I walk five miles home. No. Were you in prison for a while? No, no, no, no. Yeah. Why are you in this position? If I was in this position, right, there would be no aspects. I disagree. Someone would, someone would find you very attractive. By the way, there are, there's a woman that works at that same Chipotle, Cheryl, who's half Asian. You know, she just came to this country, right? She just got a job there. She works at the front and she goes, you know, she's 311 and she has a flat nose. And she says to her co-worker, she says to her co-worker, you know who I find hot? The guy in the back. He's funny and sweet and cool. Can I propose something else to you? I think it's not just fame. Can I just propose something else to you? Okay. What? Have I dated over the years, beautiful women? Of course. That's what I'm talking about. But even before you were famous? Yeah. Yeah. Trang, Trang. You know what I mean? Who works at the, you know what I mean? Chipotle, right? Trang, Trang, right? Yeah. It's 311, right? Yeah. She has fucking bullet hole wounds. Right? Got shot. Yeah. Yeah. A titty blown off. There's problems. There's problems. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not going to be able to get, you know what I mean? The access to women that I find attractive. You dated hot women before you got famous? No way. I was in the. Yeah, I did. Yeah, you did. Yeah. But I was in the trajectory of fame. Okay. When you were in high school. No. Nothing. Zero. Nothing. You sucked those guys' dicks. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Probably a little. I think that I was the founder of the TFL movement. I'm one of the founders. You don't even have to Google it. I'll tell you what it is. Okay? No, I'll look it up too. Look it up. You're not going to find it. Temple Fork Outfitters? No, no, no, no, no. See, that's what I'm saying. All right? What's a TFL movement? No, I didn't say TFL. TFL? TFL. We'll see if you can find it. Trang. Trang. Trang. Trang. Trang. Trang. Trang. Trang. Tra- Tra- Tra- the TFL movement all right and because I've had success it doesn't immediately take you out of the TFL movement you once you're a part of the movement you're always a member you can never graduate you can never graduate what what you're a co-founder who else did you find it I don't know who the other founder because I we at back then can't look at each other also back then there was no internet yeah so we didn't know who the other founders are right but through the internet I have found the other founders oh you slowly found your yeah yeah so when I look at certain internet videos I go yeah can I send you one yeah okay yeah yeah a tick-tock video yeah I realized this through this man through one man on tick for one man on tick tock and I will show you I'm sorry my bad your network is unstable it says okay it sounds like everything is oh here we go - Wow, I will send it to you right now. Hold on, I'm gonna send this. to carlos herrera and i'm going to tell you who else is in this group the tfl movement too okay carlos i was going to say that's why we're close yeah yeah chime chime chime is changing the way people bank you know they're not like traditional old banks who charge fees and gatekeep perks and rewards and i'm telling you dude when i first moved out to la i had no no money i had bad credit i wish i chimed back then well i needed help like chime because you get five percent cash back on chime card in a category of your choice like gas or groceries pretty incredible all while you're building your credit through regular everyday spending with no credit check and you can grow your money faster with savings rate that's nine times the national average and i'm telling you dude if we had chime back in the day would have been so much easier to help save money you know while you're out spending because life is expensive it's nice that chime has fee-free banking so you're not getting caught off guard by these hidden things and fees like most other new banks do to you join the millions who are already banking fee-free with america's number one choice for banking and if you're ever in a pinch spot me let you overdraft up to two hundred dollars fee-free you know how many times i used to overdraft all my guys still do so many fees you can head to chime.com bad friends that's chime.com bad friends sign up now it only takes a few minutes chime is a fintech not a bank banking services and chime card provided by chimes bank partners qualifying direct deposits required terms and limits apply go to chime.com slash disclosures for details superpower oh my god i'm i love getting my blood test by superpower yeah it was good man yeah it's a great job i'm you know as you get older you want to know what your health here's the problem we're old and we're probably older than most of our audience but i'm telling you it is going to creep up on you and it's one simple blood draw that gives you information on over 100 of your blood biomarkers which is uh way more than we usually get when you go to a normal doctor visit i i've got my blood drawn for a physical uh here and for and they don't do anything right they don't deep dive into what's really going on yeah what's the underlying causes very symptoms you might be experiencing they have all this stuff the superpower app includes detailed information on your heart liver thyroid hormones metabolism vitamin and mineral levels and even environmental toxins so from disease prevention to treating that annoying brain fog we're simply optimizing your gym game superpower is the most comprehensive advanced system out there my favorite part about it man when we did this it was so great it just showed me stuff because i thought like oh maybe um maybe i've this level is low or that level's low and you're just guessing yeah you're looking up on the internet but superpower gives you access to that and i was low and i was like oh my god i'm gonna go to the gym and i'm gonna go to the gym vitamin b12 needed more of that so thank you to them make this year the year you stop guessing about your health with superpower for a limited time our listeners get twenty dollars off to unlock their new health intelligence head over to superpower.com and use code bad friends for twenty dollars off your 199 superpower membership after you sign up they're gonna ask you how you heard about superpower tell them bad friends sent you and support our show i think this age of personal empowerment self-improvement uh you don't like manifestation you ignore the truth right and the truth is this okay is i'm a fucking loser i disagree yeah and and you know what i'm fine by it you mean physically because you're i'm talking physically you're internally every other metric of your life friends community job the career and i'll tell you why huge success i'll tell you why it's all shame shame based and because of shame because of shame right i can endure so much shame i can endure so much shame i can endure so much shame right right that i've gotten to the status that i've gotten to maybe you should coach the the korean uh yeah i'm gonna coach the korean team you would be good yeah i think i would be good i think that's a good callback korea if you're listening right i'm coaching the next team rename the team the tfl because we'll never win a game we'll never win a game right that's a good thing i'm gonna put every position in their opposite position okay you're a center forward you're goalkeeping all right you're a right wing you're a left back all right every position is gonna be wrong right i'm gonna i'm gonna put women in it okay anyway i don't know if this is funny what i'm saying it is but it's sad because i don't buy into this oh you might not buy into it it's just what i'm feeling as a beautiful woman in your life who is your girlfriend and you tell me so her her attraction to you is invalid she's wrong i think there are exceptions to every rule well there's no rule being broken yeah there is what is don't date ugly asian men no no i think that um let's just be honest then if you want right yeah every woman i dated right their dad was in vietnam at ptsd right took that rage you know yeah right threw it onto the daughter right and she's like i don't want to date oh you know i mean ptsd white man right right so they go to the asian right and goes you know i mean i'm rebelling you're like a hey daddy look who i'm dating right they get all ptsd it out you know right right they smell asian orange you know i mean they smell like you know it's agent whatever asian orange whatever right yeah i mean i'm here bullet agent explosions right when they go here daddy look right right they get back into that so right here's another thing flashbacks right the white women that i've dated right had a dream of getting out of white they want to get away from white so they grew up in the midwest all they saw was white people and every once in a while they'll go you know what i'm tired of white people right right i'm gonna go with the opposite okay but there's no other exceptions outside of those two but most of time it goes to black culture you're you're interesting you're that's a real left turn yep you're the farthest left turn i say eastern east i'm the farthest east that you can turn so a far right turn yeah yeah yeah yeah all right all right and you are far right no i'm liberally i'm liberally i'm politically i'm liberal okay but yeah so um i know people don't want to hear this because i feel good about myself so you're you're positioning your position is is you're okay with telling yourself that you're ugly it's being objective and more of us should tell ourselves that we're ugly i think that people should just be honest with themselves about their looks because you see a lot of mid i'm sorry i'm going to say something maybe controversial yeah right but you see a lot of tiktok i see a lot of tiktok maybe too much yeah okay maybe too much all right i see a lot of midwomen going yeah i need a guy that makes three million a year who's six foot two it's like no you're ugly and you should be dating men that are ugly yeah all right and i i'm saying that i'm going to be honest with myself right right and i go i got lucky i took some risks yeah right but objectively i'm not if you look up handsome what let's see if i hit any of the lists what does it mean to be handsome is subjective no it's not there's no objectivity objectively handsome no not asian actors just say what is the objectively objectively handsome what what does it mean to be objectively handsome yeah in america today handsome describes a man with classic dignified aesthetic appeal often characterized by strong facial symmetry and proportion unlike stop there i don't hit those you're pretty symmetrical yeah in a mythological way yeah yeah this this is for humans oh yeah yeah yeah this is for humans you have a very classic appeal yeah yeah i don't live in like a tutorial fucking you know i mean forest right yeah yeah yeah you know but you could and i will and i will so go keep going uh unlike hot which focuses on overt sex appeal or cute which leans towards a youthful or smaller features which you've been called handsome implies a refined more permanent sense of good look exactly let's go um authenticity and grooming you have that you're very authentic and you're very well groomed you always smell good the total package you are a part of the total package emotional no no extend no this is bullshit i don't think so you know is ai wrong you gonna say ai's a lie if you're looking for defined aesthetic standards it's it's dude are we out of your mind because i smell good i'm fucking hot you do smell good i know but that's not i've i've been tricked by a smell before buddy women like funny first that's what they say no that's bullshit i believe it no i don't every word i'm funny okay no no no no no no if you weren't funny you'd be hideous okay okay so if i wasn't funny i would be very unattractive it's it's a part of your your aura is that what i'm saying you're funny is part of your looks what i'm saying is when i before i was a stand-up was i funny yes more funny than most guys so i you know i mean i would hit on girls right and they were like you know and they claim we funny is the thing right then a year later they'll have a boyfriend the most unfunniest guy you've ever seen in your life they eventually come around look what's happening now no what i'm saying is that they say i guess you know you guys aren't the funniest part about this is we're about to have one of the most handsome dudes on earth on the podcast yeah it's so funny he's the most handsome dude on earth on the podcast he's the most handsome dude on the he's so handsome and talented pitch this to him get in here jimmy get him in here jimmy this is gonna be the best version of this guy needs some how are you big dog good to see you so jimmy how are you buddy okay sit up sit down set him set up in the blue he needs to be a part of this uh great men have sat in those chairs the blue blue go to blue jack black one jack black sat in that oh this is it's nice right what a handsome guy people think it might not be comfortable but yet it is jimmy put your earphones on if you want you don't need to if you don't have to can i ask you a question jimmy yeah yeah and there's no offense to the question i'm going to ask you okay okay none at all okay am i objectively handsome in societal terms already stop stop stop already i made my point because he's trying to say something positive no no he's thinking no no think it's yes or no he's thinking if i was matt rife he would say yes immediately maybe he's not attracted to matt rife okay he but matt rife is objectively handsome maybe not to him okay so go ahead i would i would say yeah yeah yeah coming in hot um yeah i would i'd say objectively yeah yeah maybe not and and let me say something i love jimmy more than anyone else in this room sure because he's being honest i'm but jimmy doesn't know you it doesn't matter but jimmy doesn't know you it doesn't matter this is i'm talking about just on my physical this is i'm talking about just on my physical appearance okay without knowing my personality appearance okay without knowing my personality this is what we're talking about you're adding in this is what we're talking about you're adding in oh can you do sketch you can yeah yeah yeah you're oh can you do sketch you can yeah yeah yeah you're good at sketch does he have improv skills good at sketch does he have improv skills no yes give a about that right what i'm saying is jimmy no yes give a about that right what i'm saying is jimmy i'm not objectively handsome but no there's no pot but you may have what do they say but you may have sex appeal yes yes sex appeal you've got sex appeal now jimmy has sex appeal and he's handsome so he's in first place okay yeah that's what i'm saying but you're still running baby you're still in the race okay i want to say this okay jimmy yeah yeah all right jimmy tatra is on the show by the way ladies and gentlemen thank you jimmy and nice to meet you nice to meet you yeah i can't believe you guys have never met before i feel like we've i feel like we've we've never met never you've never met before um good to see you though good to see you yeah yeah very handsome likewise but um he means mentally yeah mentally okay mentally you're all right so um i i i don't want to be a downer jimmy yeah okay and we're gonna get into you know what i mean yeah everything else but i just want to say that if there was a hundred we no one knew who the we were right and you took a hundred women from all over the world right attractive women all over the world and took two photos of us from head to toe and said who's the most handsome between you and i yeah what do you think the answer well but it's all over the world so remember you're gonna get some you're gonna get some votes that he won't get okay i know but what do you think what do you think it will be i think maybe maybe you know maybe like maybe like 70 30 75 25 pretty good yeah yeah and that's all and that's you that's what i'm saying that's what i'm saying okay but that would feel like i'm coming in in the middle of something no no you're not coming in the middle of something it's really good to see you give jimmy a round of applause everybody but this would be the same number i was just letting you say i'm a stranger i was just trying to get fat this will be the same number with him and i it would be a 70 30 cent i don't think so yes it would because i'll tell you why yes it would dude jimmy i'll tell you why he has traditional handsome looks jimmy i i'm i saw you when you were in san diego balboa theater balboa theater right i was in the audience watching you perform and there was two women sitting next to me this this is god honest truth they were very both attractive and they looked at me and they go your god your friend on stage is hot because i'm on stage no you took out all the stuff if you just said objectively what you asked him same thing 70 30 same numbers go ahead speak your truth 70 30 you and i maybe maybe a little it might be a little a little more skewed maybe maybe 65. okay 65 35. so i got five more percent dude thank you so much for being on welcome to the show man see welcome to the show i'm sweating over here yeah yeah don't be sweaty don't be sweaty man jimmy this is the vibe of the show this is the vibe of the show we already got through a lot of our soccer what was your stance on this see i'm i think he's extremely attractive he's putting himself down for no reason i think he's got so much uh i'm not being putting myself down i'm being objectively honest he's got a lot of je ne sais quoi you know there's something about bobby that's un it's un um when somebody says people have the x factor when it comes to talent which you have you're not you can't dictate what that is he's got that for sex appeal women do find him attractive some a lot yeah a lot yeah that doesn't surprise me that's why i said thank you that's why i said the sex appeal yeah yeah yeah but you said objectively yeah yeah that's what i said objectively if if i did they didn't know yeah who i was i think you i think the number would be closer to 99 to 1. i do globally historically historically in rome well that's not going back yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah in rome historical mesopotamia yeah mesopotamia yeah all right yeah yeah yeah for sure right and i'm okay with it i have high self-esteem right i have worth yeah i walk around with my head up high arms open with confidence he always walks like this yeah i always walk like that like a penguin okay i see that we haven't met but i have seen you walking exactly i do that yeah because that's confidence i have confidence right are you are you single no no i'm engaged but he's congratulations the woman that came in here earlier you're the one you're engaged with no okay who is she that's lauren lauren come out here for a second you think he's going to bring his fiance to the no lauren you don't have to be on screen just just can i see you oh there's hi lauren hi lauren that's your publicist stay right there you're your publicist right yeah she might she doesn't want to be on camera she's not going to be on camera okay is she on camera no okay all right so we don't we can even bleep your name off right can i ask a woman no no you're not going anywhere she can't even answer it okay yeah she knows better she's a publicist the last thing she wants to do is okay the fame side i understand it's not defaming i've accepted i'm fine jimmy how are how's your life you know it's it's uh life's good good yeah that's good yeah how you doing busy boy i feel great i feel wonderful you're fast driver fast yeah i did uh like a broth fast a broad fat yeah for how long like like 36 hours chicken or beef uh i think i alternated yeah you got to keep switching because all my friends were on like a water fast like like a couple years ago they were like we want to do this they did like a 72 hour water that's insane and that sounded intense 24 hours is the longest i've gone but i do it once a week oh really yeah and then how do you feel after terrible hungry yeah i feel absolutely terrible so why do you keep doing it i don't know why yeah i have no because you go on the internet they say it's good for you yeah they do they do but you're not feeling any any actual benefits i think that i feel i haven't had diarrhea in a long time okay that's a good thing i haven't had diarrhea in a long time that's good my stool is perfect oh pure perfection yeah like solid we're thinking about entering it into a contest yeah yeah yeah i could win after every stool you take a photo send it to chad gbt you say give me a score out of ten yeah oh i see what you've done there that looks pretty good yes some suggestions of course i do that yeah yeah yeah i mean we all do yeah and then um i also um no processed foods unless they've been processed yes if they're already processed i eat them what is that what does that entail though like like processed food so you're not eating like like chips like like no like any no chips at all no no carbs no carbs yeah yeah at all unless i there unless there are things that i'm eating that have carbs i'm not aware of like he has he has pasta and bread and yeah yeah yeah i'm not aware of those no no here's the thing jimmy i eat um japanese purple potatoes gotta have purple sweet potatoes yeah yeah yeah those are good for you you know sardines salmon you mean avocado things of that nature i'm sure they have carbs but you know i mean i'm trying to eat everything on organic a lot of are you a diet guy i recently i did a blood test came back super high cholesterol me too and i was shocked because i thought i ate really well but i wasn't being mindful of saturated fats so then what are those what are those that's like you know butter has the most so good and what i didn't realize was like eggs i was eating like four eggs a day each egg has like a gram and a half of saturated saturated fat what about egg white egg whites have none so i'm fine with eating egg whites so i kind of switched over cut back on red meat a little bit i'm gonna i'm gonna die i don't care yeah yeah eggs cheese yeah i like cheese is also it's like all the fun stuff yeah i don't eat any of that right now it's been weeks so what do you oh you said salmon and japanese purple potatoes would you call me purple potatoes my dick's purple is it yeah it really is but anyway let's move on from that pack um why do you why are you not in here well i wish i had known that before you asked me i would have given you some that would have given you some points yeah so um egg whites and so what else are you so steak also has saturated fats yeah a lot if you cut out the fat though in it is that fine that helps it helps it helps if you eat leaner meat if i eat leaner meat okay yeah i think do what you feel is right and then you'll die so who cares yeah it's not gonna matter you gotta be on camera a lot that's why you're doing it it was more because i mean i thought i was i thought i was eating well and then i saw that and i was like oh do you and your your wife soon to be do the thing where you meal prep and meal plan together no okay is she wild card she eats whatever she wants she she likes to cook uh-huh i uh like to eat what she cooks yeah and then if she's out of town i'm i'm a big postmates guy big postmates what do we need to postmates yeah me too i'll do all of it i do all of it too yeah , yeah but it's bad because there's nothing good on there it's usually pretty bad on there no you know what i do you can find i postmates arowan that i do as well thank you on the road what do you mean when you're out of town from now on when i go out of town canned sardines in my back that's all you're having yeah and sardines or do you bring them with yeah i'm gonna bring them with sir do you have any hazardous materials in this carry-on luggage i have 50 cans of sardines yeah i hope that's okay that's insane that you do that now are you ever hungry and then you're like and you just check your pockets and like oh thank god and you have a pack of sardines yes yeah a couple loose oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah mountain dew it is america's 250th birthday and let me say i'm an american you really are and a lot of my memories growing up is with the mountain dew that's right in this by the lake with my dad iconic summer moments deserve an iconic drink like mountain dew you've been having mountain dew for a long time it's an american original baby the refreshing citrus kick a mountain dew is a perfect companion to your all-american summer adventures whether you're drinking down by the lake having a 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that's the best part they've been a partner with us for a while and you know at first they send you stuff and you go oh let me see if i like it well mccone wore my shirt to the lake all weekend and i was really mad about it but luckily he left my pants alone because sometimes he does steal my pants yeah you want my oxford blue shirt don't have anything make your summer wardrobe easier go to quince.com bad friends for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns now available in canada too wow that's quince q u i n c e.com slash bad friends for free shipping and a 365 day return that's quince.com q u i n c e.com slash bad friends quince.com slash bad friends yeah i'm i'm trying to i don't know what i'm doing yes you can carry it but it's risky why because it goes over you can bring sardines in your carry-on but it's risky it's very risky the water goes over the ounce limit what if you can't check in your bag what you should do is just keep them all in your mouth the whole flight and swallow when you're hungry okay you don't check your bag yeah you don't check you don't check them no i only do carry-on like a hobo yeah i have a stick and a little bag and i walk across yeah yeah it takes a train to lax yeah train hops all the way down there yeah yeah but i um you don't ever check a fucking bag no never unless we have to when we're on a big tour if we're going on the run the world yeah what about australia are you going to check one don't do it yes try to see if you can get away with it without doing it it'd be so funny to try to do that well how long are you gonna be there for two weeks easy money you can do laundry at a venue yeah i'll laundry it i think you should i think you don't need two weeks you gotta check two weeks no no no i'll tell you why very good question jimmy right very good question thank you okay so you see that see this size four no that's not the shoe jimmy it's the jeans i have raw denim on i bring one pair of jeans ah okay so i can fade them right so all i have to do is put shirts in yeah underwear too yeah underwear and socks that's that's true because the pants that's that's what takes up the most space exactly when you when you're on the show for two weeks how many pants do you bring i bring too many pants but he's a hot guy hot guys have too many pants i just said it again hot guy yeah yeah you're a hot guy yeah because hot guys ugly dudes one pair one pair man you're a hot guy you're a hot guy you're a hot guy you're a hot guy i'll do two that's the other five hat guy no and in my head i'm going why do hat guys have more pants oh you're a hot guy hot guy hot guy yeah let me ask some brass tacks real fast yeah yeah how fun was it working with will farrell for real it was great best thing ever yeah i've never met him coolest guy in the world he's he's the best have you met him yeah but you know i've never met him in passing it's not a real i've never even been around him no way yeah i have a hard time believing that that's the hundred percent truth i've never been seen him or i mean the other day i saw vince vaughn yeah that has nothing to do with will farrell i know but i'm just telling you i get the association legendary comedy guys tall tall tall no what i'm saying is is that i'm i'm telling you how close to proximity i've been okay this is the top the degrees of yeah yeah this was my fifth time working with him see you're hot i mean that's hot's what will wants he wants i know he does surrounded by because he's got to be the ugly this is the fifth time but first tv series this is his first i think like it's his first series that's like his series that's crazy that's crazy why because in my mind i think for sure he's had a television show before but now he's a movie star and then he never he's the first entry does big big big movies at least that i know of i don't know if he's had like a the hawk now on netflix right now yeah i know that he or maybe the shrink next door is that a is that a show yeah yeah was he oh yeah he was the series regular on that and then he off obviously like he's bounding down but i think this is like but it's his lead show yeah this is like he is the hawk yeah he is the hawk we did an advertisement for your show oh yeah yeah it was fun to do how did it go we wore the hat no we wore the hat we wore the hat and we had a good time doing it yeah because we're proud of you we are very proud and congratulations where'd you guys shoot most of the show all in la everything in the show in la the whole thing except we shot at tgl oh in florida in florida so we did like the last couple days we would go out and during the commercial breaks we would shoot at tgl so the boys got the hats on there you go good job boys way to be team players yeah is that luke wilson yeah it's funny because owen has a golf show and then luke's doing this to combat it which is very funny yeah that's amazing almost like a fuck you what's luke like luke is cool yeah he's uh he's an interesting dude he's like very casual and like chill yeah that's good and laid back yeah exactly like his brother and he's uh definitely the best at golf out of out of the three of us oh really yeah he's lucas he's actually yeah quite are they better than andrew have you played with andrew i i don't know if he's i i think he's pretty good yeah he's one of the best hi you're you're can i say something yeah jimmy pure athlete pure i think i think we need to get you i think we need to get you on the show it'd be nice yeah you know what i'm pissed off about jim can i call you jim yeah sure this is like an old cowboy movie can i call you jim go ahead bob so jim um hit me bob i will jim god you're good what a crafty call me robert okay then you call him jiminy i'll call him james jimothy his first name is jimothy is it really jimothy yeah can i call you jimothy on my license it's jimothy i'm gonna call you jimothy from now on okay cool yeah can i call you jimbo jimbo i'm not as passionate yeah that's why i'm gonna call you that because there was uh in my high school a father of one of the kids named jimbo everyone thought he was super cool and he was not cool not so cool all right let's go back to jimmy so jimmy i'm going to say that andrew is a great actor can you agree on that okay i can okay what's your what's the angle here there is no angle okay there's only truth today okay yeah today is about big on a truth. Yeah. Okay. Is that you're a great actor and you're a great golfer, right? Season two, get this guy on the show. No, no, no. Yeah. He has no control over that. He's an actor on the show. You can say things. I can say things. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You can say things. I can say some stuff. No. Yeah. No. And it makes me mad that there's these golfing projects that you're not in the top three in. I get that. I think it should be on it. Yeah. Yeah. This is just for us. I like where you are though. Pretty close to my house. Oh, it is nice. Oh, that's nice. Good. Yeah. So you're in the area. I'm like, you know, 10 minutes away. Oh, you're 10 minutes away. That's perfect. Yeah, it's great. Did you read for this show? For Hawk? The Will Ferrell Hawk? I actually didn't because- Offer only. You know he's offer only. No, I had literally just come off of a movie with Will and the whole team. Perfect. And so they made it happen. Went straight from that into this. Yeah. Yeah. He's a good actor. He's nice to look at. He's nice to work with. He doesn't cause a problem. That's why he's so successful. Yeah. And then also Fortune Feimster's in this. Yeah. Who's one of her friends, a good friend. I love Fortune. She's so fucking funny. Yeah. She plays the caddy. She's the caddy. Yeah. Yeah. She plays a caddy that's like, he picks up in a Walmart parking lot. Love. And is like, hey, do you want to be my caddy? Yeah. Just a random woman from Walmart? Yeah. Yeah. Cause he's just like, he's like this kind of washed up golfer who's trying to make his way back onto the tour. Yeah. And something happens. He needs a new caddy. And he just sees this woman and he likes her vibe at a certain point. And he's like, hey, do you want to be my caddy? And she's like, I have no idea what that means. So the whole, half the time he's like telling her. Explaining to her golf. Yeah. He's like, let me get my seven iron. She's like, which one is that? It's like the one, the one with the seven on it. Kind of on the nose. Yeah. Yeah. So wait, this is the funniest part about the show that I did notice was he's got, Luke's got a shirt on that has Mike's hard lemonade on it. Yes, he is. His character is sponsored by Mike's hard lemonade. But the layers of this is funny and true because obviously Mike's is a sponsor of the show. So like clever move by them to be like, it's funny. Also, we're going to, are you the nemesis in the show? I, we kind of were, are, uh, you're the nemesis, nemesis, nemesis, nemesis. We are. Yes. Co-nemesis. Yeah. Oh, co-nemesis. Aren't you his son? I'm the son. Yeah. He's his son. Oh, no. Well, but I play a pro golfer and he plays a pro golfer. And at a certain point he's worried that I'm going to kind of start to outshine him. That's so funny. So he sets off kind of on a mission to, to take me down. That's funny. It's good. It seems like maybe it's going to be like a nice kind of father son story where it's like, you know, maybe he'll coach him. And he's like, no, do we ever see your mother? Oh yeah. My mother is Molly Shannon. Oh, it's so good. Never heard of her. So good. Anyway. Um, no, she's great. What a talent. One of the sweetest, sweetest and most talented people. She is so funny. She, on like the last day of shooting, everyone's kind of leaving. And I just, I was like, oh man, I haven't said bye to Molly yet. And I just hear like, and I like walk out of my trailer and she's blasting chief Keef. And I'm like, I'm like, Molly. And she's like, I love chief. She goes, do you know chief? Isn't he great? I was like, I love it so much. That's amazing. She drove off with like a sub slapping. She's like two twelves in the back. I make it thump. Bye Jimmy. Yeah, literally. She's the shit. Can I ask you another question, Jim? Yeah. Yeah. Shoot, Bob. Um, he's inquisitive. Do you want children? Do I watch what? Do I want children? Yes. We're trying to sell some here. Guys, bring out the kids. We have a Nigerian and a Puerto Rican. Choose wisely, Daitro. I was looking for an Asian. Good. Do you want kids? We can't have kids. We tried. We did it for a long time. Okay. Couldn't do it, but I will. Um, don't you adopt a Nigerian or Puerto Rican? We have a couple of back there. They come home with me at night. Okay. Is that why you're asking? What? Because. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, but I, we did try to have kids. I just, uh, I'm at the point now I'm 43. I think I might've missed the train. I'm 55. What the fuck are you talking about? But, but, but, but Asians specifically Koreans, they're good. We're losers. No. Look at the world cup. They're good as old dads, old white dads, scary and sad, old Korean dad, funny, sweet, cute. Jimmy, do you have Korean friends? I think so. Oh my God. Well, you got one now. You got one now. So that's one. I'm racking my brain. Where'd you grow up? I grew up in LA. In here? Yeah. Yeah. Where'd you go to high school? I went to Notre Dame and Sherman Oaks, but I grew up on the West side, Venice. Huge. Do you have Asian friends? Yes. Oh, good. That's all I wanted to hear. Yeah. Yeah. Growing up in LA for sure. You have Asian friends. This is LA. Yeah. And Mexican friends for sure. Yeah. Definitely Mexican friends. You're a West side kid. I didn't know that. How West? Venice. Okay. You could be an ocean kid. I don't know. Could have been born on a boat. Yeah. You grew up in Venice because you're what? How old are you? I'm 34. Yeah. You grew up in Venice and it was still pretty tough when you were a kid. In the 90s. Yeah. It was like a rough patch down there. It was, yeah. It's definitely changed a lot since, since I lived there. Sure. Are you a dog town kid? Oh yeah. You are. Skate? Skate rat? Skater boy. Yeah. You look like a dog town kid to me. Yeah. Yeah. You do. Did you get in fights when you were a kid? Not so much. Not, um. Were you in Lords of Dogtown? I wasn't in Lords of Dogtown. Yeah. Um. Do you know Tony Alva? I don't. I wished I did. Yeah. Yeah. You know who he is? But I did. Yeah. I mean like after I saw Lords of Dogtown as a kid, I was like, oh man. That's my life story. But that's us. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Isn't that kind of crazy though? Do you see movies like that knowing that you grew up in the thick of that thing? Like in that place, whether you knew it or not. Well, honestly, you know what was weird? When I saw the movie mid 90s. Yeah. I like wanted to not like it because I was like, nah, skateboarding movie. Like what do they know about? Jonah's movie, right? Skating. Yeah. Skating in Venice in the 90s. And then I saw it and I was like, oh man. I was like, that was, that was my life. And it was like the three dudes. It was like that black dude on the left. And then like. The little boy. That guy, the guy with the long hair. And it was like, that was my squad. I was like the little white dude. And then I had my two best friends was this Mexican dude and this black dude who were both like four years older than me. And I was the one that filmed the videos. And it was like. You didn't skate at all. No, I did. I did. Let me ask you something. Can you do a pop shove it? Yeah. Can you do a kick flip? Yeah. Heel flip. Heel flip. I have, but I wouldn't feel, I couldn't, I don't know if I could do one right now. But you pulled one off, but in your life. Many. Yes. Oh, many. Many. Let me ask you the other ones. Laser. No. Okay. No laser flip. If you can't do a fucking heel flip, he can't do a laser flip. He's done a heel flip. He said in his life. No, he said he can't really do it. I peeked at the tray flip. Tray flip's big. Tray flip's huge. Yeah. The tray flip was. Can you tray flip onto a rail? No. Okay. What? Tray flip onto a rail. Okay. He's not a pro skateboarder. Okay. That's insanely hard. He could be like Yuta Horigomi. He could be. Yeah. That kid's good. He's so good. He could be. This is your crew. That's your crew. That was literally my crew. Yeah. This is why I like you. Now, were you a little bad boy though? I wasn't that bad. No. I was like. No drugs, no booze. I was more of a good boy back then. And then the friends were kind of bad boys. And my parents were always like, we don't like you hanging out with Mexican black people. It was. It was. You know. No. Jimmy, why can't you have white friends? No. That's gay. There was. Tony Alva. It was Chris and AJ and my parents liked them. But then there was this kid, Hugo. And Hugo. Already Hugo's are. He was even older. Yeah. And he would like. He's like 45. He was like, I don't know how old, but I thought he was like 20. Yeah. Yeah. But you know, I was like 12 and he would like pick up cigarettes and light them and he would like pick up. And I was like, damn, he's like so. Hardcore. That's hardcore. Now Hugo has hepatitis B. Yeah. And then he like keyed my dad's car one time. Hell yeah. Yeah. That's what Hugo's do. I don't like this Hugo guy. Yeah. I was like, what's so bad about Hugo? He's like, he fucking keyed my car. Yeah. Why did he key your dad's car? What was. Does he look through windows? Hugo's look through windows. He just. Okay. I don't know why he keyed the car. I think it was just to feel something. Dominance. Yeah. Well, he was beat. Hugo came from a pretty tough household. For sure. Yeah. Hugo was definitely abused and this was his way to laugh. Did your dad catch him? He didn't like, I don't know if he, I don't remember if he saw, he definitely didn't see it, but he knew it was Hugo. How did he know it was Hugo? And I think. He wrote Hugo in the car. Hugo was here. Yeah. I got to ask. I got to ask my parents about, about that because it's one of those things. It's a very vague memory. I just remember Hugo keyed my dad's car. Did you? Did you rat Hugo out? No, no. Oh. Oh. Maybe he did. Maybe you did. I don't know. If I did, definitely the right move. Yeah. Yes. That's the right move. You keyed my dad's car. No. Wow. You told my, you told your dad on me. It's like, yeah, you fucking keyed his car. Yeah. Okay. Can I just say something about keying cars? Yeah. All right. And you whites. You whites. I'm sorry. Go ahead. All right. You're outnumbered here, pal. I know, but I will, I will stand my fucking point. Go ahead. Who cares? Key to car. It's just cars every day it's fine it what it does the car work yeah yeah does the door open so you're saying you walk outside right now and someone keyed your car okay all right all right so guys answer that question for me if somebody keyed my car right now would i care you wouldn't notice you would never fix it he wouldn't notice he wouldn't know it's there and also do i care no no his cars are always beat to shit yeah yeah yeah but my theory is if it runs it's fine now if he took an engine let's say hugo took the engine right then i'd be like hey hugo took your engine dad yeah it's a big deal that's a big deal this is gone too yeah yeah the wheels are all gone it's a big deal yeah it's a big deal but as long as the car moves you can open doors right and everything else a little key that's fine he's a car guy i'm a car guy it's a big car guy yeah it because the whole point of a car is to get from a to b no right jimmy yeah no it is am i making a point for you or no you are it's a valid point all right can i key your car after the show i'd rather you did it okay okay okay okay yeah all right valid idea though also this is why now a lot of new cars have their there's no physical key that's why they put them in like little things or it's keyless now yeah i have a hunting knife you just oh it's attached to your keychain yeah it's a yeah yeah i have a klingon hunting knife thank god yeah for a second i thought you wouldn't be able to yeah yeah i was worried yeah where are my keys i do have a does have a knife yeah yeah and he has a key yeah i have one of those he just carries a sigh around yeah you're like sir you have five packs of sardines and a hunting knife and no clothes am i being detained if a dog pooped on your driveway yes that's not your dog yes would you get angry well it's funny you ask this just happened maybe two weeks ago amen and tell your story it was your dog i was pissed yeah i my neighbor texts me neighbor dave and he's like yo one of the neighbors just left a massive shit in your driveway and it's like i mean this was this was a big one and it's like dog must have been fasting right at the bottom right at the bottom of the driveway you know yeah and uh and so i look at the cameras and i see the i see the girl oh i see her just let the dog take a shit she's she's like on her phone watches it happen and then just keeps going and i was like i for a second i my neighbor was like he's like you won't print that out and put it around and say this girl's leaving shits and i thought about it and then my fiance was like definitely don't do that okay i won't do that but i was planning on if i saw her being like you got bags on you and if she said yeah i'd say make sure you're using them i go come here i gotta i gotta you help you clean something up yeah because bobby's been on the other side of this bobby has had bobby's had a flyer made no go to images bobby's had a flyer made someone in his apartment complex yeah so what does it read there hi i'm bobby lee i have a couple of dogs they look like rats and they bite yes i don't clean up i don't clean up after them uh if ever uh my defecate on my property my property so someone made this in his old apartment complex no way yeah uh yeah let my dogs defecate on your property you feel as though i owe you money or an apology you know where to find me bobby lee bobby lee live and then my podcast tiger belly and his ex-girlfriend and my ex-girlfriend yeah address was there too i mean they they plugged all your all your it was nice number one so what happened what happened was jimmy is this person took flyers put them all over the neighborhood yeah in front of cars and guess what i did i took the flower i made them into t-shirts and i made money off of it really yeah and they sold out you made i was gonna say it's kind of a fire yeah i made the t-shirts off of it it's under tiger belly my podcast right and this is what my belief is right you should be allowed what pooping on people's lawns he thinks you shouldn't have to clean up dog shit oh it's natural now you and i feel the exact same about it okay so hold nothing back okay yeah i know i i don't feel the same i feel more closely to you have you have a whole scene about this in dave yeah we do a whole poop scene about that that's exactly right and you're mad about them putting it in the in your trash can yeah which also i actually i'm like look if you put it in my trash can it is what it is i don't care about that but don't put it in my recycling no that's when i get mad put it in the right place i'm like at least put it in the black one yeah you know put it in the black one put it in the black one always yeah give me your shit interesting interesting stuff this is hilarious because i'm over here thinking i had this unique idea to put this on a flyer like i'm gonna print print out my security camera footage of this girl you and here you are i'm gonna shit on your driveway why no i want you to take a photograph i'm gonna shit right in your fucking driveway jimmy right get the public and you make the shirt give us his address yeah get the publicist in there you have like small dogs right no i'm gonna shit yeah but it said they're like rat like yeah they're small they are tiny one of them just died in his rat way well yeah yeah shouldn't have been shitting yeah he was murdered okay all right yeah and we can agree on that i'm gonna shit on your driveway okay we can agree to disagree but yeah that exactly thing happened i do love no it was like a bernie's mountain doodle you know the big huge shit yeah huge yeah mine are little ones i gotta clean them up takes no takes no time it's easy yeah yeah yeah okay well you know because if it's on grass fertilizer it's not though it's not it's not how it works poo is not fertilizer uh is all poo not all poo not all is all poo fertilizer so you let it poo and then you kind of rub it in i exactly do i'm a nature guy yeah not all poop is fertilizer feces are rich in plant nutrients like nitrogen phosphorus potassium raw waste contains harmful pathogens bacteria and parasites uh safely broken this is human no any any poop any poop needs to be composted specialized this is raw human waste no there's dogs dogs dogs cats pigs carry parasites pose serious health risks to humans no i'm sorry then i i didn't realize i didn't realize it changes everything that changes everything for me i don't want parasites to be spread around yeah if they have it but also it needs to be treated you're right you know what everyone listening right now i apologize i i i had a buddy that was like he was like yeah like he has this massive dog and he was like yeah sometimes like i won't bring enough bags and the dog will shit multiple times and i'll have to just like bare hand it what and i was like no no no i'm sorry bare handed like there's no world where that's bare hand shit he said he bare handed it no and and i was like that is yeah you don't bear hand it's not bare handed it's not bare handed it's not no if and here's my excuse i didn't have sometimes i forget the bags no he he forgot the bags deliberately no that's not true sometimes i have the bags well now i have a backyard jimmy okay it's poop it's all poop it's all poo yeah right and i have a pool and poo it's a pool and poo yeah yeah i have a swimming pool and a poo and when my girlfriend and i go lay out yeah in the backyard we have to angle our chairs around the poo yeah and i have fake grass so you do the math oh you do the math yeah yeah so you all this time you thought you've been fertilizing your fake yes yeah yeah i thought so yeah apparently it's fake but everything just changed for you today no not really i don't care this will be the same yeah literally nothing will change jimmy when does your show come out uh it's out july 16th it's out right now so go check out jimmy's show please go watch the hawk right now the hawk on netflix starring not only molly shannon and not only luke wilson and not only will ferrell but our beloved uh jimmy tatra one of the most funny cool dudes that i've gotten the pleasure to know at the very least i want to play golf with you outside of that show i don't even need to be on the show we gotta go play some golf yeah we should play some golf we gotta go fart around i'll caddy he'll caddy i'll be the fortune peep sir me him and uh bryson he caddied for us me and bryson me bryson and bobby did a we just shot like a one-hole walk and talk thing but we're gonna do it we're gonna do with bryson soon right don't we want to do that the breaking i think so yeah i'm not doing that yeah come on i'm out please no why i don't want to do any of that anymore i did it one time what's your what's your handicap i'm a 2.0 index what is index is that under no index just means like uh it's like an aggregate it's on the app so any given course probably four or five something like that for him jesus there's something around there that's insane did you have fun here jim i did yeah good please go watch the show right now on netflix can you look in that camera jimmy and say thank you for being a bad friend thank you for being a bad friend yay We'll be right back.