D’Arcy Carden on Being Kinder To Yourself

This is a Headgun Podcast. We'll talk about dogs and kids and things. We'll talk about chicks and tampons. Strings will talk about boys and me. You cry. We'll talk about death. Because people die. Great. Wonderful. Thank you for having us, Darcy. Thank you for being here. Thank you so much. I should have cleaned up. This is my living room. Oh, we finally have you here. I know. That's how I feel. Finally. Finally. We tried for a while. We really have. I don't know if you know that. I do know. I mean, we've got a few. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I always want to. I'm always trying to make it work. But you know how these things are. Of course. But I mean, I also, for some reason with things like this, I don't like it to just fit into the day. I want like time before. I don't want to just like be rushing from one thing here. Yeah. That means work. This is like, yeah. This is real. I don't want this to be like a, okay, did that. It's really special. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're special. Oh, the fuck. You know, what are you doing? I didn't even know. There's just no. It's like, this is brand new information. They're crazy. Oh, they're so high. Are they? Yes. You know what? They are. I look at these every day. But like, I think it's hit the fat is disappearing from my face, because I'm aging at rapid speed. You know, like, you can. You know, you can. You know, I'm like, I'm like, I'm going to be like, I'm going to be like, - You can make this negative however you want to. - Yes. - Okay. - But it's still really good. It's really good. - It's like gorgeous shape. - I like you. - I like you. - I just heard a couple of many of your other because Darcy said, "And we were like, your hair." - My hair. - And then, I made it negative right away. 'Cause like, oh, day one hair. So, maybe I'll flexing. - Yeah. - I don't know, but we do. - I don't know. - But we do. - We do. - I just called my sister out on it. Because my, we have a text chain. One of a million text chains. - Okay. - This one's called, "Sisters and Neces Cousins." Wait, is that what it's called? "Sisters and Neces Cousins." So, it's like all the girls in the family. And my aunts will often like send an old picture. Like, look at us in the '90s or whatever. And my older sister always, always without fail. Says something bad about herself. And then something good about the person. She's like, "Well, I look like shit." But you look so cute or like, "Those glasses I need to burn." Or whatever. She always is like, "And then I had to say, hey girl, you need to be nice to yourself." - That's right. You need to be nice to yourself. - She says that all the time. - Yeah, I do. - How many positives to get a rate of a negative? - Oh, tell me. - 10. Okay. - Yeah, 10 is so true. - 10 is so true. - It's a lot. - That is so true. - It's a lot. - Meaning you think 10 positive, okay. This makes sense in so many ways. Also, like, you could hear 10 positive things about yourself and the one negative thing is the only one that-- - Only when you were kind of straight through. - Yeah. So this is about thinking positively about yourself. - It's a positive period. - Positive period. - So 10 positive thoughts to counteract one negative. - Okay. - So if you're like, "Oh, today's gonna be a shit day." - Yeah. - Then you have to repeat, today's gonna be a great day, 10 times. - Where do you guys stand on that? - A portion. - Sorry. - No, tell me. - A portion. - Where do you stand? - Sorry. - That was really funny. - Like, thank you. - But where do you stand on, like, you know, this sort of like mantra or like, just if I say something nice to myself, sometimes I struggle with like, do I really mean it though? I can look in the mirror and be like, you're great. But is it worth it to just say it or do I have to like really feel it? - Like if you're lying. - Right, like the sort of like, I love the idea of like, morning mantras or whatever, where you can kind of look in the, you know, like little kids do. - Yeah. - I'm beautiful, but I'm like, how do I do that if I, how do you, isn't just about saying it? - Yeah. - Okay. - Yeah. - It is. - Yeah. - You don't need to believe it. - Oh, yeah. - Pattern interrupt. - Yes. - So it's a pattern interrupt and think of it this way if it was reversed. So say you come into the world and you're this precious, beautiful, loving kid. And you hear all the time, you suck. And inside you're like, I don't though. I'm like, really good. - You're hearing it. - But you keep hearing it. All of a sudden you start to adopt that belief. - It's true, 'cause it's like even when you're in like, a horrible relationship where they're just telling you horrible things about yourself like beat you down forever. - Right, right. - You start to believe - Right, that's right. - This is a little bit the same, a little bit different. There was a while like each in your high where I was like, if I smile every morning when I wake up all day. So in bed I would like, I'd like, - Oh, that is. - Actually a thing. - Yeah, I think I must have heard it somewhere. But it really did work. - My mother. - Yeah, exactly. - But I would just like lie in bed and smile. Like I would be like the act of smiling is gonna like force me to have a good day. And then I feel like it worked. I do feel like it worked. - It is a thing. Like you can automatically shift things. - I should do that again. - Make yourself smile. - Yeah, I should do that. I do that every morning I say today's gonna be a great day about a hundred times to my head. - You do? - Every single one. Like in bed getting up, - I'm getting up and it's like that feeling of like, (Katya laughs) - Right. - Right. - And then I'm like today's gonna be a great day. - Yes, you're gonna be a great day. It's like a nudge in the direction you want your thoughts to hang on to. - Right. - And then I do that thing with Ali - Every single morning. - Do. - Every without fail. Me and my son, we look at each other and say today's gonna be a great day I can and I will. - Oh cool. - And so even if I forget, he'll be like, mom. - Yeah. - Are you serious? - You kept that up. - Everyday. - That's great. - And because I have a fucked up head. - Right, right, right. - It's not because I'm like good. - It's because I need it that bad. - Otherwise it's gonna be even negative stuff. - Yeah. - I love that he loves it too. That's really cool. - That is cool. I'm regretting not starting that. - No, don't regret. - Why? - Yeah, and today is a great day. - I can and I will. - And today is the day. - Today is the day. - Today is the day. - But it was like the whole day. - Today is a really good day. - And where do you guys stand on abortion? (laughing) - Yeah. - I mean, I find in my fucked up mind, the second someone says something to me, I was just telling a lot of you this across the street. Like my mom, I was like so overwhelmed and stressed out this morning. I'm dealing with a puppy and like, it's just another thing in a day. Obviously I love dogs. - Happy, great. - Happy, great, the cutest thing ever. - But also, I have to figure it out. - And I was just also the time of my cycle when I get insane. - Yeah. - And my mom was trying to calm me down. And like anytime my mom tries to calm me down, I instantly go the opposite. - Oh, interesting. - And I'm like, - Like, you're verding me. - And then she said something to me like, you know, well, if your body feels a stress or whatever, bad things are gonna cut. She said something where I was like, well now I'm in an anxiety for the rest of the day 'cause like what the fuck's gonna happen? - Right, you just like cursed me. - So negative, yeah. Like now I'm cursed and now I'm like, but it's like that anxiety spiral. - Yeah, spiral. - But then she corrected it very quickly. She was like, I didn't mean it like that. And as soon as I'd bad, whatever. - So now it comes for me in the middle of the night. - Does it? - Yeah. - You wake up. - Like, it's like such, not even arbitrary. It's like silly stuff. You know what I mean? It's like things that I'm almost like, I know this is an important, but now I'm like, but it really, it really spirals me and then it affects my body, like my heart rate. And it's kind of almost not funny, but I'm like, this is not important. I know this is an important, but right now it is so important. I think if I just, I'm really good at not looking at my phone in the middle of the night, not to brag, but I mean ever. - That's a big idea. - I never do it. - You look, you're fine, you're sick. - So even if like, I even look at the time. - No, wow. - I don't either. - I don't either. - I don't either. - I don't either. - I don't either. - In fact, I thought like, should I get a clock to just like not- - So you don't look at your phone? - It's about the phone. - Yeah. - Also sometimes if you, do you have a pop socket on the back of your phone? - I used to. - Sometimes if you like, angle your phone like this all night, a screen comes on that's a clock. - Yeah. - Do you know what I'm talking about? - Oh yes, yes. - But not always. - It's also a red, red, which is really creepy. - I don't know. - Yeah, yeah. It's like the devil's clock. (laughing) But yeah, but so then I think like, oh, maybe I should write this stuff down 'cause then part of this spiral is like, this is important or this is like, this is a little detail. You forgot to put this person on the list or whatever. You're not gonna remember this in the morning and then that becomes part of the spiral. So I can fix it right now. I should have a notepad by my bed with a pen. It's done. - And a booklet. - And then it's done. And a booklet. What are we doing? - What are we doing? - Like, the next day it just sort of goes away. And you don't almost like remember it again and again. - You don't remember it again. And it's not as crucial or-- - Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that was silly. - Yeah, but in the middle, it's so heightened that it's the thing forever. But I find all of that. Like, it's just, I think you get older and you're just like, oh, everything's really fucked up. - Oh, a little bit scary. - Yeah. - It's just like, why am I here? - No, it is though. It is, yeah, no, I am. - Yeah, yeah. - No, it is. It is. It's like sometimes, sometimes, I'm like, will anything ever be good again? - Yeah. - Or even if something is good, there's also something bad forever now. - Consent, it's getting negative. - It's so big because you can't have it. - Yeah. - I struggle so much. - I'm just kidding. - I know. - I love this, come on. Come on, we're struggling, gals. - I love you. (kissing) (laughing) - The cheekbones. - Yeah, I am. - This is a compliment. - Yeah, you're mine. - Do you seek out negative things? - No. - Oh, I'm like a pervert. - Do I? - I don't know, like are you looking for, they know, the murder, like, you know what I mean? Like, I need to know. - The murder? - The murderer. - Who the murderer. - The kidnapper is, I am like out of sight, out of mind. If I don't see it, it doesn't exist. To a fault, you know. I don't know how people rest at night, not knowing who the murderer is. - Yes. - Like, we're Nance-y-as. - We're Nance-y-as. - Who killed, why did that guy David killed that girl and put her in his trunk? Like, did he? - David who? - The musician. - See, this is like, oh, oh, yeah, yeah. - I know, just like, like, you know what it is. - You know what it is. - It's like a little breeze through my brain. - Right, but I know what you're talking about. - Yeah. - I know what you're talking about, but I don't follow the trail. - I don't either. - Yeah. - And my husband does too. - Oh, we do. - And we're sort of, I mean, I think that's good for, what's this? - Yeah. - Yang, Yang type thing. That's pretty good. - That's pretty good. - That was bad. - Did you have that on deck? - And it's pretty good for, whoa. (laughing) - My hand's doing. But I, you know, he's like, you have to know everything in order to know that it exists and it's real. And I'm like, I don't wanna. But I don't wanna. - Right. - And I think our brains are different and everybody's brains are different. But I'm like, if I know about it, it's the only thing I can think of. I'm like, it affects. Sometimes I feel like I, I feel like things, maybe this is like so self centered, but I almost feel like things affect me more than the average person, which is why I'm like, I can't, which is maybe, maybe. - Right. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I think I used to be, and I've. - I've trained out of it. - Yeah. That's probably healthy and smart. - A little bit. - A little bit. - I don't know that I am. - And how do you recognize that in her? - I fuck everybody. - Yeah. Well, that's great. How do you recognize that in her? - She's super sensitive and like, just feels things are stronger than most. - Yeah. - Yeah. And it also, maybe like, overactive imagination, something which I feel like I've always had to. So, yeah. I'm like a scaredy cat with certain things. And so then, if I go down the, the, the, - No, it's really smart. - She's really into the door of someone that you don't know is coming. - No. - No. - Never. - Never. - No. - Never. - Yeah. - Yeah. - No. - Is there anyone that actually does? - Maybe. - Men. - Like, yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Maybe men. - Like, my daughter's selling Girl Scout cookies, and she's knocking, and I'm like, I would never know. - I know. Well, I guess it, oh, God. I mean, obviously, a parent is with her, right? - Yeah. - Obviously, you're like, what? (laughs) That's, you know, when, what I just did, obviously, a parent is with her. Like, if the answer was no, I would never have been it. - I put you in such a situation. - Yeah, I'd be like, absolutely. - That's what we're, you'd think of tonight, and you're sleeping. - This is, again, not the same thing, but we're renovating her and now it's right now. And I got a text from my mom today that was like, I just watched something about like kitchen sinks. She was like, um, you're not getting a double, right? You're getting a big one. Like, she was sort of like, of course, you're not getting a double. - Oh, no. - I was like, fuck, getting a double now for the rest of time. I will know that you know. - May the wrong. - Yeah, exactly. - You're gonna look at the fucking double sink and you're gonna be like, why? - Yeah, I think we're getting a double. Maybe we're not. (laughs) - This is, what are the pros and cons, though? - I do, that's what I have to do when I'm not. - What do you guys have? And let's talk about it for the rest of the podcast. - I don't have a double. - I don't have a sink. (laughs) - Well, I don't right now. I have a double right now. I find it useful. - I do too. - I like to put the things that are like, rent stuff on that side. And then the things. - It's like organizing. - Yeah, and I don't love my single. - You don't love the single. - But love a single. - That house we're in right now has a single. We're like, you know, renting a whole, we're renovating. - Yeah. - Um, renting is so funny. Whatever. (laughs) Whatever. Yes, that it has a big, a big old big boy and I love it. - You do. - But then our house before had a double and I loved that. - So I guess I'm just easy to go wrong. - I feel like people say a single. - I need to know. - Where's my phone? - No. - I think she was just, I don't know. - She didn't, okay. - Should I? - Yeah, I mean I have a serious. - I have a serious. - 'Cause I remember when we were redoing ours, our interior designer was like helping measure. 'Cause I was like, I don't know what I had to pick a sink. - Right. - Like that's weird. - The house. - And she was like this. And it was a single. - Okay. - It's just a single, big old. - Just big sink. - The house that we are renovating, that we love, but is from another time. It's so old, it's so old, it's so old. And nothing it was ever redeemed. It was like an old metal sink and one was low and one was high. - I don't like that. - But when you were telling me, - That's how my old one is, it's annoying. - Right, but it is like, I guess I am easy to please, 'cause I'm like, it's good for some things. Like I like putting my, I don't know what, when I put my coffee cup in it. - Your mugs. - Yeah. - But why? - Because they're up there. - 'Cause they're up there. - It's kind of a reason. - Explaination. - Okay. - And they're up there exactly. - Exactly. - Things go down there. Okay, she said, what kind of kitchen sink will you have? I just read an article that said, do not in all caps get a double sink. That's such good advice. A single sink, the bigger the better, that's the ticket. - Mom, mom. - Mom. - Now it's bigger. - The bigger the better. - Also just do not get it. It's also so funny, 'cause I'm like, - Oh, you're hard at it. - Yeah, you're like already done. - Wait, but I'm telling you, I'm telling you, they know how to just get you. - Right. - You're like, "Mom, why the fuck did you say that? "Cause now I'm gonna be obsessing." Say, "Arty, or the thing." - If you just didn't say that, - It's a double sink. - We love our moms. - Love so much. - We love so much. - I know, that's so true, that's so true. - Because she's my world. She's my everything. - I know. - But also, what the fuck, mom? - But also I like that she doubled down on it. Like that is such great advice. - Exactly. - Exactly. - It's like, what do you think? I read this article, what do you think? - That's exactly what she's like. - That's best. - That's the ticket. - Yeah. - This episode is brought to you by IQBAR, our exclusive snap and hydration sponsor. - IQBAR is the better for you plant protein-based snack made with brain-boosting nutrients to refuel, nourish, and satisfy hunger without the sugar crush. - If you're new to IQBAR, their ultimate sampler pack is the best place to start. You get nine IQBars and four IQ Joe Sticks. So you can try everything and you can find your favorites. - All IQBAR products are gluten-free, dairy-free, soy-free, non-GMO, and made without artificial sweeteners. With over 20,000 five-star reviews and counting, more people than ever are fueling their busy lifestyles with IQBAR's brain and body-boosting snacks, hydration mixes, and mushroom coffees. - And their ultimate sampler pack lets you try all three in one go. 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Rachel, you got your whole bed from there. - It's true. - Beautiful. - Beautiful. (upbeat music) - Where does your mom live? - My parents live in the Bay Area. - Oh, yeah. - Is that pretty close? - I grew up there, yeah. - Nice. - In the East Bay. - I'm gonna start going into Bay Area, like, geography. - Like, why? - I grew up in a town called Danville, which is maybe 20 minutes from Berkeley across the bridge San Francisco, and most of my family is in the Bay Area still. - Oh, that's nice. - Do you miss it? - I do miss it. But I'm not enough to move back, but I don't even really mean it like that. I love the Bay Area. And do often think like I could live here again. But I'm just such a little company girl. I love working. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - You could live there. People do. People do. - People do. - I guess I mean an actor could. But I feel like the actors that do live there are like the richest actors you've ever heard of. - They're really successful. - Yeah. - They just go with this stuff. - Yeah. - But I do love it there. We were just there a couple weeks ago. - I've never lived in San Francisco. That's almost like a right of passage for a Bay Area girl. And I just didn't do that. I just moved right to New York. - You did? - Yeah. I said, "You know." - Like you know. - I mean, we ride your feet. - No, you know. - Okay. - And you want. - And you said New York. - We did know. - Yeah, you did. (laughing) - So you know. - We know. - Yeah, but all of my friends growing up, everybody like lived in San Francisco for a time. Like I actually know New York so much better than I know San Francisco. - Was that right? - Yeah. - That's interesting. - Yeah. - How long were you in New York? - I was in New York for 11 years. - Oh wow. - Yeah. - How long time? - And I feel like I know every single street in New York. Like I feel like I have a memory or something on every fucking street in New York. And in San Francisco, I was like, "Which way is, I don't know which way anything is." You know? - That's very interesting. - Would you move back there? - Back to New York. I would, no. I wouldn't, I would, I love New York. I love going there to work. I love going there for a spell. - Sure. - For like a, even a long time. I did a play there. So I got to be there for four months. A couple of years ago. - Oh, that's fun. - That's fun. - I was like, this is it. - This is the moon. It's like, spend a good chunk of it. I think I love New York so much. We have it either of you guys live there? - No, I always want to. - Yeah, it's like, it's like, the best place to live, but I like living here better. - Best place to live with a little bit, right? - Yeah, without children. I don't know. I mean, I babysat in New York. So I was with children a lot and it was hard. I always kind of had that thought where I was like, "Damn, this is so much harder than, you know." - Not long did you do that? - I was a nanny, do you wear? - Yes. - I was a nanny for a long, I like, hold on now. How long? I want to say 10 years. - Well, the whole time I was there really. And here for a couple years. Like, up until right before I got the, like right before I started like working for real. - Yeah. - I was nanny-ing. - Yeah. - Yeah, I think it's a great, I do too. - Gig. - I do too. - Can you nanny for Bill and Maggie? - I did. - Yeah. - Mm-hmm. I did. - I read your wicket. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, that, that, it is a great gig especially for, like just for that sort of day job, like I was waitressing, I was tempting. And all those jobs just were like, actually I've waitressing is so fun. But as fun gets so hard. - It's hard. - It's so hard. - Nanny-ing is like hard, but it's like so rewarding and lovely and good to hang out with the kids. It's so, it's lovely. - To me, it wasn't soul sucking either. Like, waitressing felt soul sucking. - Yes. - I feel like that I was treated as if I was like, not a human. - Yes, yes, yes. - Whereas nanny, at least in my experience, the families, you become part of the family. It's like, you get a slice of like home. - Yeah. - It's not toxic. Unless you work for toxic people, obviously. - Well, that's the other thing is like, I would like, really spread it out. I would like nanny for so many families. And the second I didn't like, one of the parents, I'd be like, I'm busy. You know, I just would be like, I'm busy. So I only work for people that I liked and I only work for babies that I liked. - Yeah. - 'Cause not all babies are kind of people. - That baby was an asshole. - No, kind of, where you're just like, I don't connect with you, baby. (laughing) And that was the thing about haters is I was like, I fell in love with their daughter. And then I was just like, this is my place. - That's amazing. - It really is, like it's about connection. - Totally. - Connecting with people. And that's in the workplace too. Like on TV, film, whatever. - Yeah. - It's the same thing. - You mean like working with people that you like and not working with toxic people totally. - And then there's always gonna be toxic people because that's just a given. But it really is. - But God damn, it sucks when there's, - Oh my God. - It's hell. - It's hell. - When there's like a, I mean, you know, like there's always like a dud or whatever, but like toxic people are scary. - So scary. - Stay away. - Well, it's also contagious. - Yeah, that's true. - It's contagious. - Yeah. - Even belief systems are contagious. - Yeah. - Wait, you know. - Yes, we are. - Yeah. - Here we go. - I mean, I'm just saying like scientifically, like you are the sum of the five people you spend most time with. So if you have someone that's like, "Mm-hmm, nothing ever goes my way." - Right. - That kind of belief system, then it starts to like wear off on you and like all of a sudden your thoughts start to go to that frequency. - I totally agree. And even had to like sort of cut a friend out that I realized like was that. - She was lovely, nice, funny, but I was like every time I'm with you, it's so negative and like so shit talky and gossiping is fun, but it was like dark. It was just like slopples. - Yeah, there's slopples. - Yeah, yeah. And I really had to be like, and that's also a hard thing to communicate with somebody, you know, I don't want to be like, you're toxic. - Right, right. - Yeah, it's just not a good thing. - I know. - I know. - Like you're fucked up. - I know. - No, please. What will I see the pet? - No, no. - This is like me trying to get a ship for that. - Yeah, you should have a little blur out on the feet. - Yeah, that's going to be true. - That's really fun. The foot edit. - The foot edit. - Yeah. - So how did you get out of that? - I, I maybe like, it's on this podcast. (laughing) - This is maybe not like a great, no, no, no, not maybe. This is not a great attribute. I can ghost. - Hmm. - It's just easier. - Sometimes it is and it's like very much easier for me. You know, it's like, it's really selfish. But I have ghosted a few in my life where, like I don't know if I'm such a ghost or these days, but I feel like in my, in my earlier days, what a thing is in my earlier days, I would, I could just do that. I could just kind of be like, and I'm done. - Yeah. - I can do that too. - Yeah, I'm fine. - What time are you? - Cap. Does that mean anything? I don't know much about Cap. - Yeah. - I love it. She asks if it eventually does. - I know. - I know. - It could mean something. - I don't know much about Cap either. I feel like everything I hear about it, I'm like, that's not me. And then occasionally. - There's like a few things. - Yeah, where I'm like, whoa. - Right. - You got my ass. - Whoa. (laughing) - But I don't know, I don't really, I don't really, what is my, I just found out that my niece is a triple - Yes. - So it's my sister. - It's your aunt. - We're gonna pray for your niece. (laughing) - She's amazing. - She's amazing. - She's like a candle. - What will it be? - She's just powerful. - She is. - Yeah. - It's cool. - Yeah. - Powerful. - My daughter's a Scorpion. I don't know if she's a triple double. - I feel like triple is a pair. - I don't think she's. - I mean, take it seriously. - Yeah. - Yeah. - For really? - Oh yeah. - I don't really know what it means. - Now she knows that. - But it's like rising, right? - Mm-hmm. - Rising and I don't know. - It's like moon. - Okay, moon. - And ring and honoring. - I mean, I'm like, "I'm not going to talk to my ass wearing this aura ring on a different podcast." - [laughs] - And I was like, "Take it off." - No. - It looks-- - I'm happy you have it on because do I need it? - Do you need it? Okay, here's what I love it for. It has really helped me walk more. Like, I am so competitive with my own steps. - Yeah, yeah. - So it really has, like, when I just had the iPhone and I feel like it was like an approximation. - Yeah. - Or I would just not-- - Oh, I can't even break in love. - Yeah, I mean, it's what? - It's kind of fun to look. - Yeah. - But also, it's like if you don't-- - No. - If your phone's in your purse or-- - Yeah, yeah. - It just feels like-- - Always on your own. - Yeah. - You're like, "Those 10 steps, we're not fucking kidding." - I realized I was like getting so obsessed with it when I-- I did Handmaid's Tale a few episodes of Handmaid's Tale. And we did a lot of like, running scenes. And I would put my phone-- Okay, imagine on Handmaid's Tale, like boots with like socks. I would put it in like, because we shot it in Canada and the winter in the outdoors, like layers and layers, layers. And I would put my phone like up against my foot so that I would count the steps. - That was so true. - And then I was like, I guess I should just start wearing an aura ring, although I guess I couldn't have worn it on camera. But I was realizing like-- - We were gonna smaller down somewhere. - But it would be like really into-- There was like a running night especially. And we got like-- - I love this music. - How many of you were like, "Oh my god, running." - There was a lot going on in that show. - There sure was. - A lot. - A lot. It's intense. - It scared a lot of people. - Yeah. - Wait, can you tell us about this Will forte show? - Yeah, I will. - Please, because I'm so curious. - Okay. - What if she said no? - Yeah, I don't wanna talk about it. - No. - I don't wanna talk about it. - That would be really funny to be doing press, like, you know your show's coming out next week and you go on a podcast and you don't. - I'm sorry. - That's the one thing I don't wanna talk about. (laughing) - Do you either of you guys know Will? - No. - No. - You should have a mind. - I've heard so many stories. And I feel like he's the best. - He's the best. He's obviously so funny and crazy and nuts. But in real life, he's the sweetest little sweetie. He's the most caring, generous, thoughtful, like being funny is a side part of him. - Wow. - He really leads with kindness. - That's crazy. - Really? - You don't find out. - I know. - He's a fashion accent. - Yeah. - Right. It's almost like when he's funny, it's like, whoa, oh, I forgot, you're so funny. - Wow, that's so interesting. - And he's so funny. And he's so uniquely funny. (laughing) We, I mean, he's the weirdest. - Right. - I love that. - I'm Seth Meyers, my one he told about his speech at his wedding. - It's the funniest thing I've ever. - Oh my God. - I mean, it is the most-- - He goes, you don't. - He did his, didn't he do his character? - Yes. And I remember like, at a wedding, imagine in front of like all of your family. - Here's wife family. - He's playing this character. This like really kind of disgusting, like dirty guy. And he's like, and he says, I shouldn't like, he's basically like, Alexi is Seth's wife. He's like, Alexi, the most perfect tits. (laughing) - The wedding. - Then which is him, like when he goes into a character, he is gone. - Come on. - Yeah, it's really amazing. - So good. - But anyway, he's, He's so funny. We shot the show in Australia. And we didn't know each other going into it. We met like, we didn't know each other. We like have, it's so weird. We have so many friends in common, so many comedy friends in common. We grew up in the same town. - Wow. - I'm just like, he's older than me. So we grew up at the same, like we didn't, - But that's still crazy. - It is crazy. We actually like looked at a map and a map on our phones. - I was like, - We looked at our fucking phones. - We opened a map. - Yeah, and drew it. - But we realized that like, where his mom lives now is like, a five minute bike ride. I'm saying bike ride because I was like a kid from where I lived. And where my family ended up moving to was like down the street from where he grew up. - Wow. - It's really funny how much we circulate. There's like an old Taco Bell. One of the oldest Taco Bells is like, closing down in our hometowns. - Oh, that's tragic. - But just like he knows. - He like, when I said, did you hear about the Taco Bell? He's like, yeah, like he knows. We really should have known each other when we were like kids. - Yeah. - So when this came my way, it was working with a director who I had worked with at the good place. And made a movie with who I adore and would have gone with him to Australia anyway. But then when he said, "Well, forte," I was like really excited. - Of course he was. - I just like, what an odd idea. - Yeah. - And we met one. We had sushi one night like the week before we went out there and I was like, oh fuck, I hope this is, we're about to spend four months together. Like I hope I like him. And he's just the best. He's just the best. - I love him so much. - Our husband, how do you say that? Our spouses love each other. We like, (laughing) - Are you saying that? - Our husband wives love each other. (laughing) - When I was a wife. - Our husbands and wives. - When we got to Australia, my husband didn't join for like a month or two. And so they just like adopted me. I just would like go to the zoo with them and go over for brunch and hang out with the kids and it was really sweet. - That's very easy. - Was that hard to be away from him for a month or two? - Yes, but always like knowing, yeah, we will see each other again. - Knowing that he's coming. You know, like, yeah, they're like a light. I'm kind of good with-- - But you guys have been together a long time. - We've been together for so long. - How long? - Well, damn near 20 years. - Holy smokes. - I know. - That's a long, so long. - That's why I got my job. - That's really good. - We just like, we have like, you know, the sort of, I feel like a lot of actors have like the three-week rule, the two-week rule or whatever. But then COVID really messed that up. And I think we were apart for like three months while I was shooting something in the Dominican Republic. So now a month is like handle. Or maybe whatever it was in Australia. I knew he was coming and I was so excited to like show him. Also, I was working every day. So if I was just enjoying my time, I would be so bond. But I was like busy. - Yeah, yeah. - It's different to now with like, face time. - Yeah. - It's not like, oh god, I'm bad at it. Even when you are away. - Yes, I am. Which sometimes he has to be like, hey, focus up. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Remember, let's like, you know, I'm very, not this little sound worse than, I mean, it, not out of sight, out of mind. You're texting all day. I feel like there's gotta be a better word for it. - Yeah, like it. - It's like, like, like, like, like, like, be in front of me, you know what I mean? - Totally. - How to site out of mind. - You're like, you know, - Really in the way that I'm in Australia. (laughing) - Not that. - Just like focusing on the thing in front of me. And when the thing in front of me is work. - I like all. - I like all. - I can imagine. That's also, I just have to say, thank God it's like the most non-sexual love with that always helpful. - The most like brother sister vibe. Like some, I think, Trent who directed everything at one point was like talking to the crew about, he was like, have you ever like seen such chemistry between, or like, non-sexual, basically he was like, such chemistry between two stars, but nothing sexual. It was great. - I'm just like, no, that's never been seen. (laughing) - That's weird. - That's weird. - It always gets weird. - It always weird. - Something weird. - So tell us about this. - Yeah, okay. So we, she's the whole, she did, I told her to talk about it. And you're forcing me. And I don't like it. Okay, so Will and I play brother and sister. I'm like crazy wild card. Like, I'm like the tornado sister and he's like the straight lace planner. We go to Australia because we've started the spray tan company. And for me, it's all about like business and, you know, like money and power. And for him, he's following his ex-wife back to Australia, who just left him. And by the way, I'm so bad at this. - I'm doing great. - Great, great, great. I'm also like, how much do I tell? I'm gonna tell you, we, we, (laughing) this is what I'm gonna think about in bed tonight. I like it. He gets like blackmailed. He ends up like sleeping with someone in like a little, like a little drunken episode and ends up getting blackmailed for money that we don't have. 'Cause we kind of act like we were like doing really well with the spray tan company, but we're not. And so he's like a target. - He gets blackmailed. - He's a target. - He's a target. He's a target for a smart business. But I'm like like bad, bad people. - Bad guys. - And so we get mixed up in the wrong crowd, right? He's getting blackmailed. We don't have the money. Do things get violent? They do. - Do we end up maybe killing someone we shouldn't have? We maybe do. - Oh wow. - And then the whole show is just us trying to like outrun them, but also the spray tan company is starting to do really well. So we can't leave Australia. - On the plus side. - Yeah, it's really fun. So it's like funny and crazy. And yeah, I did about job explaining it, but it's really like a very dark comedy where there's like, you know, a lot of violence. - Oh my god. - Which is so fun to do. - So fun. - I love that. - It's the best because like, I was looking at all the things you have going on. - Yeah, yeah. - What do you think I blended, too? - Oh, I did. - I mean, you and Will were going staying in these places. - Oh, I love this so much. - And as I'm just spending it, I'm like, what? - I'm like, where did the air being be? - That's so funny. - And I'm like, wait, what spray tan have you're playing? - Okay, great, great, great. So you're just like, no, but that show, I was like, this is amazing. - I was doing about 40. - We should do that. You and I should do that in Australia. - That's genius. That's genius. - Well, my friend, I think I would be so excited. - I love, I love this so much. (laughing) - Wait, wait, wait. - Goddamn headgun box. The season two of either of these shows could be me and Will doing that. - Oh my god, I'm dying. - I just, I just, I just, I'm dying. - Okay, so what you're mixing it up with is this show called Wild Vacationer and Zolls. With me and Sherry Kola, where we do exactly what you're saying. We go to different, we go to No Will for Teo. - What could you match with the show? - What the hell? - That is so funny. - It's also funny because like, depending on how much you mix them up, like, is that a scripted show? Is that an unscripted show? - I would want it unscripted. - We should. - Yeah. - We're excited for all of them anyway. - Anything. - Both. - It's really funny. - Everything with you in it, I'm excited. - Now I'm like, oh, what's this scripted show about two people that are staying in a bunch of different MVMDs and maybe like, who did something? There's something for that. - Oh, for the other show. - Yeah. - Effect him out last week is, it's called Wild Vacation Rindles, it's on HGTV. - I'm obsessed with those shows. - Okay, good. - And the fact that you are the one doing it and staying in these places, I'm so excited. - Okay, good, good. - It does sound so, like, we're breathing it. I was like, I love that. - It's so fun. - So much for you and Wilforte. - I know. - Sherry Colo, who's the co-host right now, was like, hey guys, can you stop? It's me, not Will. - We're just erasing her. So I'm doing two shows with Wilforte. - One is breathing. - I mean, okay. - You should have Sherry Colo on too, she's so great. - Oh my God, we'd love. - Yeah, okay. - So we go from state to state, staying in different rental properties. And they're not just like average. - We're not so sure we're right. They're not your average property. It's like, we stay in a cave, we stay in a tree house. - What? - We stay in like a missile silo. - Yes. - Wow. - So really wild, that's key to rental. - Really wild. And yeah, it took a long time to come up with that name. (laughing) I'm like, you need properties. - That sounds so fun though. - It's so fun and it was so fun. And I've never really done like, have you done something like this? Like a very unscripted show? - No. - Well, we're doing it right now. - Um, where, yeah, it was such a like new experience. - There's like certain things that they want you to hit. - But not for some reason? Yeah, I guess there is, there is. I was gonna say not on this show, but yes, totally. We have to like, by the end of it, we have like a way we judge the house, you know? - Got it. - Which always, as a, me and your daughter, I almost said sister, me and your daughter, it's hard for me to judge a house. - Yeah, that's hard. That's, I don't wanna say anything bad about a house. I really don't. And so a couple of these houses, friends have been like, I love Bobbobly. I totally wanna take my family there. And I'm like, don't. (laughing) Right, I didn't say this on air, but don't. - Yeah. - Don't do it. - Most of them are great, most of them are great. Most of them are great. - I could never be a judge of anything. - I know me neither. - I judged the finale of the HGTV Bachelor Mansion - You did. - This season. - Yes. - Yes. - How fun, it'll be on like, we'll be back to back. - Oh my God. - Yeah. - They're always back to back. - Wait, that's so cute. - That's so cute. - Yes, I did. So that was the first time, and you have to judge. - And you have to be a little, like they definitely wanted me, especially to be a little harsher. Sherry is better at that. - Yeah. - Okay. - What did you have, like, where you, like, this place sucks. - Well, we're definitely, like, I had definite, strong opinions, but like, I didn't really wanna be honest 'cause I can't come off, like, a complete, you know, whatever. - A whole. - A whole. - A whole. - But I had to, I was like, what the fuck is that? - Yeah. - Oh, fun. It was fun. It was a lot of fun. They have, like, their, you know, standing judges, and they have guests come in. And it was a lot of fun. - I have a hard time with, like, when the person that did the thing is standing there. - Is there? - Yeah. - They're, like, right there. - They're right there. - Like, is it cake? - Is it, yeah, I did it. - Did you do that? - No, I haven't. - You haven't. - You should, yeah? - You should, yeah? - But, can you do that? - You got it. - I'm always, like, why are you cheering when you get it right? I feel so bad for the people. - Right. - Yes. - I, I don't fucking do it. This is a little similar. There was one called, hold on. - I feel like I saw you on one of them. - Yeah. - 'Cause we watched, daughter and I watched all. - Watch, it was a gingerbread one. - Was it sugarbread? - Yeah. - No, it was called, like, what's the other one? With them? Is it with the sprinkles, lady? - No. - Well, that maybe that sugar crush. - This one is called gingerbread lane or something like that. - It was, like, a holiday special. - With all of our Hudson. - What? - Interesting. - Really? - Yeah. This is getting, this is getting crazy. - This is the world for a day. - Yes. You're like, oh no, sorry. - I know, only judge one episode, like you. But it was like where all these gingerbread makers are standing in front of you. And their like tears are like overflowing in their eyes. And you're like, not you. - Wait, you and Oliver Hudson judged it together. - It was the whole host. - And I was just a random ass judge in one, yeah. - All of our Hudson hosting it. - Gingerbread, he's great. - Competition. - Yeah, it's your randomness. - These are just funny. - I know, he was really great. I know I wanted to see. - Is he funny? - Uh-huh. - I don't, I mean, I don't know. - No, he's funny. - He's totally funny. - Oh, that's awesome. - Yeah. (laughing) - Yeah. - Our friend fumbled him. So I think we paid attention. - Oh, gotcha. - He's like funny. - Fumbled like he wanted it. And she said, no, no, no, no. - Or maybe they like stepped in the nut. - Okay, she fumbled it. - It just sounds. - Yeah, I thought he was always like hot guy. - He's hot guy. - So it's funny. - It's okay. - It's charming. - Charming. - Yeah. - I know. - Funny. - It's funny. - It seems like that whole family's funny. - Yeah. - They're charming, they're funny. I don't know 'em, so. - I don't know. - But they all seem like they have a great sense of humor. - Humor seems like a dashing good looks. - Dashing good looks. All of them, dashing good looks. Am I losing hair rapidly? Dashing good looks and humor is at the forefront. - That's the most important thing. - I agree. I told her you. - I had an argument with someone the other day because my daughter, I was like, all her friends think she's funny. And they were like, that's not the most important thing. - Excuse me? - What? - Who's this? - What else is there? - Who's this dumb person? - Sorry. - Like a very dumb person. - That's not the most important thing. - What is like, I mean, I guess what I'd be curious what they think the most important thing is. - Yeah, too. - Yeah. - I'm not very busy. - Maybe like kindness. - Like kindness. - Kindness is great. - Kindness is great. - Kindness is very important too. - Kindness is very important. - It goes under her humor though. - Right, humor is number one. - It is, but I guess it's such nice. - Also different kinds of humor. - Of course, they're nice. - Of course. - And like, no, humor's humor. But like, I guess I'm like, people that are like punching down on the floor. - Yeah, it's not great. - Yeah. - Yeah. - People think sometimes like my husband will say that wasn't funny, that was mean. And that happens to Rachel all the time too. - With your sense of humor. - Yeah. - And somebody will say it. They'll be like, that was mean. - Only, there's someone. - Only, only meant. - Only meant more than ever. - That was not funny. - Interesting. - That was mean. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) - A very long time ago, I remember dating someone in my youth and they were like, you're me. - Interesting. - And they're like, oh my god, you're not funny. - Right, you don't get it. - Now that was funny. - Like, yeah. - I think that men are really sensitive to that stuff. - Yes. - I think that your goes are easily bruised in a way that's kind of astounding, in a way that we have swallowed our whole entire lives. And I think if you look into your teachers, dads, whoever a teacher's men, I'm thinking of adult men. Like, adult men when you're a kid, we are trained to not, women get, we make fun. I mean, I'm like, I actually don't even really mean my mom and dad, 'cause I feel like my dad has a great sense if you remember about stuff like this. But the way we make fun of moms, for example, and you know what I mean? Like, the way a husband can make fun of his wife, that it's just like a cute thing that we do. It's just like, it's just like very accepted. And if you watch, like if a wife was to make fun of her husband, the way would like the chill in the room. I just think it's really accepted for us to make fun of women and it's not accepted for us to make fun of women. Do you think that or do you think we're meaner to men in our jokes and we are to women? Like, would I say something to a man that I think they can take? Interesting. That I wouldn't say it to you. That's an interesting point. But I wonder, well, is it like because you think you could take it or is it because you like hate them? (laughing) It's like, are you guys okay? No, no, no. I don't even know. No, I just mean like, I'm not even talking about any of our, yes, signiffs. I mean like general, in general. I think if I'm joking with anyone, it's never because I hate them. Yeah, right. Because if I hate them, I'm just not even-- Oh my God, communication, right. That's so true. In fact, I feel like I have, like this is high school, young, young, young, like have joked with someone I hate or don't like. And it goes so dark so quickly that I'm like, I don't like the way that feels. Right. I remember like not liking a girl and kind of like making a, just sound very bull-ish. And I don't think I was a bull-y at all. It was like one instance where I was like, I didn't like her, she was mean. And I had an opportunity to sort of like clown on her ass. And I made a joke and everybody laughed. And I was like, oh, I won. But then I was like, I don't like that was like too mean. Yeah. Does that make sense? Totally. Yeah, it was just like, or even like too, yeah, yeah. It was too easy. It was too easy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. It was, you know, when you have those like, almost like life altering moments as small as they may be, where you're like, I don't want to ever do that again. That did it feel good. It doesn't take you more of those. I know. What else do you have? Oh, God. What are those moments? I know. Just air it all. You see, like, I remember like, let's see, let's see. I'm also like, it's also funny. I know you guys know this, but the difference of what I would tell you off my, yeah, of course. Immediately. I'm like, some of them to my mind too. Yeah, yeah. Filter, filter, filter, filter. Yeah, love you audience. I put a jail if I told you to. I told you. Yeah. But let's see. Like right now, she's like, I killed someone and I was like, that was the whole park. I didn't like the way that felt. No, it did not. Like, yeah, I'm thinking of like, I'm going to keep it super, super general. Yeah. But maybe like, and this is early on, but like, being caught in a lie, and the person being like, you don't have to do that. And me being like, whoa. Yeah. Like, it's so much easier to not. And it feels like, yeah, the feeling I have right now is like, I never want to feel this again. Yeah. So, yeah. So that's one. That's a good one. Yeah. That is a good one. Yeah. I think that's experiential. You get to, you don't learn that until you go through it. Yeah. Right. Like as kids, kids will stretch the truth. Yeah. And then one day, there's a consequence for that. Yeah. And then that's when it changes, hopefully, totally. Right. Right. Right. Consequences. And then that I find interesting is any white lie. Yeah. Even if you're like, I'm sorry, there was no coffee. So I was late. I had to go somewhere else, right? She's like calling me out. Yeah. That's exactly what's happening right now. So even if, and this fucks with me, because once I know something, I can't unknow it. Yeah. Because then I'm like, oh, I'm going to do that to myself. So you do a white lie, little white lies, and you think they're harmless. But what you're doing is you're signaling your subconscious mind that you're not trustworthy to yourself. Yes. Yes. Yes. So then you have low self esteem because you're never going to like have high esteem for someone that lies to you. And so you're signaling your own damn. I know. Isn't that fucked up? That's really good. It is. It is. You know, like good to remember. The thing to come back to of like that same question is like, how do I want to feel? I don't want to feel like that. Yeah. I don't want to feel uncomfortable. Yeah. And I will, little by little by little, I'm not going to have faith in myself. Right. Right. And it's a hard. I think I need to hear it hard. I know. Because I do think I am guilty of white lies. White lies. I'm like, I do a lot of little ones to make someone feel better. Almost unnecessary too. I do. Yeah. And I think I'm like, I caught myself the other day. And this is a good, this is a good like putting a putting a face to a name. Yeah. Yeah. Like being able to sort of name it and having your. They text me. That's why we're doing this. Who say the person you like to? Oh. He's an intervention. We've had a camera on you. You're a good one. Yeah. When she sent us to this. That's what the show is. We've been tracking your phone. That is a hard game to play with yourself. Yeah. Can I find the truth? within this. Right. Right. Do I look fat? Oh. Like, what do you do? Right. To yourself. No other people. Okay. Oh God. What do you do, though? What do you do? What do you do? What do you do? What do you do? No, I mean, I never, like, that one's tricky. No, no, no, no. I don't know. I don't know. I don't think that person first saying it. Right. What do you do? Who? You could be like, that's not my favorite outfit. Yeah. Maybe it's not the most flattering outfit. Flattering is always a way to do it. A safe way to go. Yeah. I feel like we're honest. Like you guys are honest with each other. Yeah. I feel like my husband and I are really honest with each other about that stuff and not in a hurtful way. Right. Never hurtful. Yeah. So like, what would you say? But to me, I feel like being honest is like the most comforting thing you could do for someone. Yeah. Other than being like, no, what you're seeing is they're like, I'm seeing this. Do you see it? And you're like, no, I don't. And they're like, but I see it totally. Yeah. I don't you feel like it makes you trust each other more. Yeah. And then it's like, you know, because I feel like my husband and I are honest with each other about stuff like everything, but about stuff like this. It's like when he says you look great, I believe it. Right. Because he's honest. Yeah. That's what I meant. Like, the things he says to you to make you believe in whatever he says. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I do. Okay. Let's play more of this. Okay. What else? Well, I was thinking like, what about your kids? That's hard. That's hard. Like, can I, mom, can I sing? Oh, right. I mean, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. I mean, I guess like so much of it is about like, you'll be like, this is not for you. She's not a liar. You're like, straightforward, mama. If my kid was like, can I sing and they couldn't? Yeah. Of course you can sing. Does that feel good to sing? I'm not going to say you're great at it, but you guys I This makes me want to cry. Oh, yeah, and it's so good. We're here. My husband sent this to me the other day I'm going to botch it but I'm going to give you a gist. Okay. He's out by the way. He's so hot. Yeah. Yeah, I think you thank him and he's a doctor He sent me this thing the other day that said This woman had to tell her son That he's being kicked. Did I tell you this that he's being kicked out of school? Okay, because he's a genius and The school doesn't have the capacity to teach him right They don't have the facilities. They don't have the teachers. He's too smart for the school. So he's gonna have to leave and So they took him to a different school Grows up the mom's dying. He goes through her stuff and he finds the letter from the school I can't and it says your son is no longer allowed at the school He has an in ability to learn. He has no capacity for learning his behavior is such that we cannot Help him anymore. You have to find a new school for him We just true Yes Yes, I've heard this story and I'm for that was like for the first time again Well, oh that's a miss so it's basically saying like like if if he had believed in him. Yes, I believe that about him Wow and You can lie the Thomas Edison drop So that but she knew her son was a genius right right right right so it's not like you're a shit singer right But it is finding you have the capacity to take your voice as far as you right right right right right right right right like yeah I love that you don't want to gaslight them and be like you're amazing right right right I don't know good. Yeah, one really good really good. Oh, I mean we just dropped that. I love that it was like guess who the kid was Thomas fuck mother fucking Edison. I love moments like that like like the drop the drop Yeah, yeah, that's great. That's great. That's great But it also is like okay, so people do rise to The expectation yeah, right so the line just instead of like closing the door on something Which is that would have been that it would have been like I'm an idiot. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I love that right You too and then and then there's all I mean I'm trying to think of like ways my parents, you know would have lied or whatever Yeah, I think it was hard You know that's that's a big one. That's a huge line that we do really wreck reckoning reckoning with Here's the thing this isn't a lie because I don't say Santa's real. Okay. That's where she's at to I love you believe right and if they say I don't know I say okay, well Well, let's see if he brings you present right right so I'm not like Santa is real you must believe right But I'm like I choose to believe in Christmas magic right so I'll say things like that because I kind of do yeah Right, I know it is tricky. I mean it's tricky and I know and I like don't even There was anyone for any of it because it's like you could definitely you could They're necessarily yeah, yeah, you could My parents that are like overly honest. Yeah, they're like fucking Santa never existed. Yeah, you know like that vibe I just feel like why yeah, right? I asked my dad so young you did and he told me the truth He did yeah, but I think I was like four. Oh, that's really young No, I was fine. I was fine and he he wasn't like I think he did a great job because he wasn't like He's like yeah, we were lying or whatever it was like it was that like what do you think and like yeah? Yeah, that would be a little hard for him to get to all the houses and you know It was like that type of thing and then I was I was like Here's what we'll do we'll set out what will like set out a card and it will say like Mary Christmas from and if he signs it He's real. Oh, that's great, but then my dad was like I don't think that's like he was like that Put him in a position where he has to then yeah, so he I just remember being like I figured it out and he was like let's not do that Oh, wow. Did you grew up with a dad with integrity? I guess I did that's outstanding Yeah, he was he was I mean is he's a winner in integrity down in a good way He's a lot of that totally you're close to your dad. Yeah, that's really really cool. Danny and Laurie Good parents. Oh, good sweet parents. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and they're still together. Yeah, still together Wow, since ready for it. Yeah high school. What which I don't stand for But you are like 20 I know but you know it's funny is because like it wasn't I because we Jason and I both like had You know have like dated people before we were in our 20s. It felt very adult. Yeah, it also felt too soon We also knew it was too soon. Okay. We were sort of like let's not right and then our our bodies had a different idea But you know, we were like we I think we sort of recognize like if we do this it's it's it's on yeah So we did push against it for a while and then and then you can only push it. Yeah, but since high school That's yeah, do you believe in soulmates? Do you believe in abortion? I do believe abortion is real Let's see Yes, but I also feel like This is I think very like unromantic. I think you could have like multiple soulmates. I think yeah But maybe that's soulmates is different than like true love. Yeah, soulmates is like I Don't know I mean, yeah, I mean, I'm tall. I look at it. Yeah, I do think I mean Yeah, I guess I still would say I think you can have multiple but maybe that what is a soulmate? Is this all right like specifically like your one your one souls mate? That's not even so late like a lot of pressure. I know Yeah, I don't I don't do you I believe in soul clusters Yeah, I think like we come in and like wake stuff up. Yeah, yeah inside of each other I'm like yeah, I do too. I do like that It may be like you know friendship can be like tiered best friend close friend or whatever Maybe soulmates are like even on top of best friends, you know Top of best friends. I like my soulmate on top of my best friend And then your third show okay, so so we have to hit my third show is me and will forte In Antarctica again we I It's a show called five star weekend which is based on a book by Ellen Hildbrand that if you haven't read Your sister has or your cousin has it's like everyone knows okay. Yeah, like when I should do that for our book. Oh, yeah Yeah, when I um told my older sister we were face timing and I was like I booked that job and she was like um And she was like what what which one or whatever and I told her the name of it and she like reaches down and picks up the book She's like how cool. It's like you know very yes Fun book and a great writer um, okay, so it is listen to this goddamn cast Jennifer Garner Regina Hall holy Chloe Seveny Gemma Chan Wow Judy Greer Wow Timothy elephant G. I know that's bananas. It's so fun It's so that's amazing. Yeah, and it's like a most toxic This this this was like this sort of Like the especially since we've wrapped all we talk about is like I can't believe it went that well Like there was no no duds no dicks no toxic That's really massive. It was a kind of I mean I think I've been lucky on a lot of like really non-toxic sets, but this one was just like, it was a bunch of like professionals, you know? - Yeah, like they're not fucking around. - Yeah, yeah, that's amazing. - No room for any of that. - No. - Yeah, so it takes place over a weekend. Jen's character, this isn't spoilers, this is all in them. This is my fear of spoilers. - I know. - She loses her husband and to death. (laughing) - He dies. - Yeah, yeah. And realizes that she's sort of like lost touch with all of her best friends. So the five star weekend is what it's called. And she invites a friend from each like phase of her life to come to Nantucket, to her home in Nantucket, and give them like a five star weekend. Give them like like, you know, food and drink and shopping and spa and all that stuff. And do you think some stuff goes wrong? Yeah, it does. - Right. - Yeah. - But you know, it's like childhood friend, college friend, mom friend, all that stuff. It's really fun. - That's really sweet. - That's not what friends are you? - I'm mom friend. - Your mom friend. - Yeah. - Got it. - Which is really fun. - That's fun. - Yeah, I'm sort of like, happy to be here. Can't believe I've included like that type of friend. She's like the best, you know, childhood and college. And then I'm just sort of like. - You're like with me. - Look at me, I'm here. Which is so fun. So fun. And we got to shoot a Nantucket. - Oh, you actually shoot. - L.A. and Nantucket. - Wow. - Which was just fun. - That's so fun. - It was like three months or so here. Great, fun, amazing, but like hard work. Six, day weeks. We like really went for it. And then Nantucket, not that we didn't also work hard, but it was like a vacation. - Yeah, I feel like. - Nantucket. - Was it in the summer? - It was in the summer. - Or is it in September, which is even better. - Yeah. - So it's not as hard as it is. - Still wet and wise. - Yeah. - A lot of-- - I want to do that. - I know, Mike, I want to go. - I know. - That was, you know, like, I feel like with every job, with every acting job, whatever, I'm just like, so grateful for it no matter what. And you do, you know, some are just, the perks are better than others. Some you're like, "Okay, great. I'm going to like the middle of nowhere to like stay in a shitty hotel, but I, you know, like whatever it is, you just like, for like a low budget, no money, but you do it." And then you get these other ones where you're like, "I get to go on vacation." - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Where it's so fun. - All your things, I cannot wait to watch all of them. - I think you might like them all. - I 100%, I have a two. - Yeah, I'm going to like them all. - Great. - Yeah. - It's a knowing. - Yeah. - K and O.W., or it's a no. - No, it's a no. - No, it's a no. - It's a no for me. - No, for me. - For me. Anything with you in it, Darcy. - That's nice. - Well, you're just awesome. - Do you know that we've been co-stars before? - You have? - What? - To-do list? - Yes. - Oh, oh. - No, but I mean, the joke is that I have like one line in it. - Oh. - That counts. - Okay, I have to say, like Maggie, that movie is so funny. - It's kind of like, I mean, could we call it like a modern classic? - Yeah, I think it's like, I mean, it is like the, just, it's not that long ago. - I don't think that's long ago. - It wasn't that long ago, but like, but looking at that cast is insane. - That cast is insane. - Outstanding. It's so, it is insane. - It's crazy. - And it is so funny. It was kind of like, Aubrey is, she's amazing. - She's amazing. - Yeah. - It's like, ahead of its time, I love, yeah, it just was such, it's such a funny, it's such a funny movie. - It's such a, I wish more people would. - Me too. - It's just one of those. - It's one of those. - I guess when I say modern classic, I'm like, I feel like, I'm like, I don't know, modern classic means, but I feel like it's one that will like, stay on the test of time. - Yeah. - Like, if it had like a big Netflix moment or something right now, it would be on. - It would be. - I feel like they should really fit. - They should, right? - Yes. - What was your line? - Something along the lines of like, what scene was that? - It was like, do you remember what the original title of that movie was? - Handjob. - Yes. - It was the Tid show. - The handjob scene. It was the handjob scene. - Oh, in the theater. - In the theater. - It was called the handjob. - The handjob. - Which is amazing. - It's like, it's like, let's bring it back from the reboot. - Yeah, that's the handjob. - The handjob is title. - It should be called the To-Do List, colon the handjob. - Yeah. - Yeah. - For the reboot or whatever, for the Netflix drop. But the handjob is happening behind me. And I'm in the scene with my husband, Jason, who was one of the producers. He was worked with Maggie. And this is now so long ago. This is back in the days where he was an actor producer. - Is that how you met him? - We met doing a play together. - Oh, cool. - Yeah. - But then he was acting and we moved to New York and with me and he was acting. And then his day job was in a production house and then he just became obsessed with that side. And very quickly was like, oh, this is what he was acting is for dorks. And he's like, I don't really want to be like standing on this set all day being told what to do. I was like, oh yeah, that makes sense. But anyway, so he and I are in the movie theater and I'm like, you have to say something, something like that. - Oh yeah. - We're going to pull up that clip right now. - And now he, I'm just thinking about it. He had like a beard and they had him shave his beard and so it was like a 90s, right? 80s, 90s, a 90s mustache. And this was like, I think this was the first movie I was ever in. - Oh my God. - And truly I'm on one line. But so happy to be there. Was there nanny and it was just like Maggie's, like me an absolute bug on her. - And could I mean? - I know. - I know. So many people can do that. - Like she was so mean. - She was so mean. - Totally. - And the movie is so smart and so funny. - Yeah. It really is. - It really is. - Revisited America. - Yeah, everyone, the Tadula. - Yeah. It's nasty. - It's not the hand job. - It's called the hand job. That's all you need to know. And if you don't know what that means, you definitely should not watch it. - You should not watch it. - Or you should. - To learn. - Oh actually, it would be useful. - But just not with your parents. - Yeah. - Not with your parents or children. - Yeah. - No hand jobs. And that'll be part two of the podcast. - Oh my God, thank you so much. - Look at guys, thanks for having me. - You are the best. - I'm not saying that. - Everyone knows it though. - Oh, I'm great. - Oh, yeah. - 10 to the negative thing. - 10 great. My hair is very brushed well. I am wearing some comfortable pants. - No, take your shower. - No, look at it. - Okay, let's do it. - I put in my cute earrings. I'm really nice. I'm a good driver. - Yeah. (laughing) - I said no one ever. Like, I'm mystery. (laughing) Compliment yourself. - I'm a good driver. - You've got four more. - I am a good sister. I am, I am, I am, (laughing) I am, let's see, wearing my ororing with pride. - Let's go a little bit more. - I am a good partner to my husband. And he's good to me. We have a good thing. How many is that? - You have one more. - Okay, I am really great. - Yay. (clapping) - Sweating, sweating, sweating, sweating. (laughing) (upbeat music) (whooshing)