Coaching in action – PCC Level Demonstration (Part 2)

Well, it's a very good morning and a very good afternoon and for many of you listening, it's a very good evening to you to our U.S. colleagues. Good evening. Welcome to the Coaching Cafe. My name is Natalie Ashdown from Open Door Coaching and today we are looking at listening for the PCC level competencies. And we're looking at a coaching demonstration, the second half of the coaching demonstration. And I want to welcome to the line our Learning and Development Manager, Bridget Calvert. Hello to you Bridget. Hello there Natalie, thanks for having me. And welcome everyone. We've got Sydney, Vancouver, we've got Brisbane, we have California, down the road in Melbourne, so lots of people joining us for the Coaching Cafe welcome. But before we begin, as always, let me acknowledge the traditional owners of the custodians on the lands on which we're all meeting today and their continuing connection to the land, the waters and the communities of Australia and all around the world where you might be joining us either live or you might be listening to this on your favourite streaming service. Welcome. Our podcast is huge, we have lots of people hooking into the podcast which is really exciting. We pay our respects to them to their elders past, present and emerging and elders from indigenous communities from all around the world. So our agenda for today, we're looking at coaching in action, we're going to listen and debrief real live coaching sessions. And if you are new to the Coaching Cafe welcome, we're all about creating that community, we're all about having shared learning experiences, thought, provoking conversations together, together. If you are a regular welcome back, as you know we love coming together and we love learning from you as well. So please feel free to pop a message into the chat box as we go along during our coaching cafe today. So I am rushing a little bit just so we have enough time to listen to the second half of the recording and debrief it together. So let's recap, when we last listened to the first half of the coaching recording, it was just last week you can pick that up off our blog if you haven't listened to it, you can catch up. And we looked at our core competency number three, establishing and maintaining agreements, core competency, ICF core competency number four, cultivating trust and safety. And we listened to also we were debriefing core competency number six which was listened actively. As for in terms of a recap with the coach and the coachy, we had explored the motivations of why this this topic was really important to the coachy and we explored who the coachy really wants to be in terms of their leadership. And Bridget pointed out to us last week that ACC level coaching is about thinking about what the coachy wants to achieve and moving forward with that. And as we move into PCC coaching and the higher levels of PCC into MCC coaching, we really want to think about who the coachy wants to be. What has this got to do with who they are, their leadership and who and the difference they want to make in terms of how they show up. And so there's a lot of conversations around that around this conflict that we were listening to and what that might means. We would have heard a really strong sense of trust and safety, the active listening that was allowing the coach and the coachy to go under the surface to elicit assumptions that the coachy might have been making. And most importantly to elicit those beliefs that the coachy might be holding. And this is a really excellent demonstration of eliciting beliefs that are then getting in the way or their barriers to the coachy moving forward. But that's what we really got up to. We also are going to now pick up the conversation where the coach actually asks what would it be like if the coachy didn't have those beliefs. And the coachy describes that he would be confident. He'd be able to walk into the meeting feeling confident. If you haven't listened to the first half of the coaching conversation, don't worry. I think you'll get enough out of this second half to really think about what you're learning here and what the coach is demonstrating in terms of the icy of core competencies. But I really do recommend you pick up the first half. When we're listening to this recording, you can have the transcript in front of you that's available to you on our blog. And you can also have the icy of core competencies in front of you as well. We're going to be listening for five maintains presence. We're going to listen for icy of core competency number six active listening. We're going to be listening for core competency seven, how the coach evokes awareness. And we're going to look for core competency number eight facilitating growth. Now, it's not going to be possible for us to debrief all of these things in just one short 15 minute conversation. So we're going to highlight some of the things after we listen to the recording that you might be listening for. And like Bridget and I, I really recommend you go back and listen to it more than once to really pick up those key learnings. Okay, so you're going to listen to the second half of the recording. We won't be making any commentary during the second half of the recording. We will turn our videos off. We welcome you to just be open to listen to the recording. And we also ask you to listen with being non-judgmental because even myself, as I listen to back to the recording more than once, I can hear, I can hear where as the coach, I might have pivoted into different directions. But what we have to remember is as the coach in the moment working with a coach, allowing the coach to lead the conversation, it's a coach led conversation. So there's different things that we could have done. And at the same time, let's listen without judgment because in the moment, you're using your instincts about which way you might, what question you might ask next. And of course, we could all ask different questions, couldn't we? But it's about what is the coach doing from an instincts point of view in that moment. All right, everybody, I hope that sets us up for what we're going to listen to. I'll just pause for a moment as we actually set the recording going, bridge you can give us the thumbs up that you can hear us. And I welcome you to sit back and have a listen. Oh, so let's just focus on that. Remove some of these, because it may be that these obstacles are largely self-creative. They could entirely be the ability of something that they may not be real. I mean, he might just be being provocative, you know, who knows? Because I haven't actually had the confidence to talk to him yet. Yeah, and it makes me think about what if you embraced his provocative because, yeah. And high purpose stuff, but clear. So it is a, what if question then? I think so. And helping, you know, I think if I think a bit like that, it'll help me to remove some of these obstacles that are largely self-creative. And that would certainly be because, you know, we want to have a diverse range of views on this. And this will be a long and expensive strategy to implement. So actually, a huge advantage to have it serve some provocative questions to sort of stress test it at the start. It would be stronger. That's just, I can see that, that's what, how does that make you feel? Well, actually, it's sort of reframing that around that. I can see a way of harness what feels, what feels, well, what comes across. I mean, what's the difference? I had an email the first thing this morning from the person who's project managing this. So he was very, well, if we could harness that critical energy and use that to strengthen the project. But that feels now very different prospects. I'm really liking that, as a way of approaching this, because going back to my beliefs, which I know, you know, our beliefs, but I probably not far off the mark, much more likely to achieve the outcome we're looking for, which is that the projects happen and happen as well. So rather than sort of either bulldozing those beliefs that this is the person has or just sort of driving around them, better to harness them. And you're harnessing, I'm just playing around with this idea with you, you're harnessing, you're harnessing a powerful, influential, super smart, super academic, it's like, yeah. Yeah, that's a really excellent way of thinking about this. So I think that gives me actually much, much better way forwards. There's still a bit of conversation, but it would be framed completely differently now. Because, you know, I think that's another, and again, one thing I've realised is that where I'm interacting with people who do like that sort of, I'm about that academic contest, you know, it's better off not to even get into that, because you end up with a winner and a loser, whereas taking that approach is not about the contest anymore, it's, it is, you know, and I can imagine me, the more difficult questions I could ask him, so it's not a challenge. It's just, you know, wouldn't it be great if we could use your many years of experience here and all of your insights and your expertise and blah, blah, you know, and then, and I think that points about the powerful influences key. In fact, it wouldn't, not only would it be good, what kind of role do you want him to play but it would actually, it would actually, it would actually, it would actually assist the project. It's giving him, yeah, yeah, so I mean his position, having him not just sort of accepting it, but actually promoting this and driving it and being, you know, if that miracle happened a champion for this, that would actually transform everything, this would, this would no longer be in a pill struggle with just obstacles all over the place, constantly having to find ways over, overcoming those, there'd be a real sense of a clear, clear path with the shining light of the gold visible to everyone at the end and the key influences who are the tribal leaders actually supporting it, that would greatly increase the chances of success and the people across the whole organisation would embrace it. Yeah, I mean, it's compelling, I'm wondering, you know, you reflected on what kind of surface for you, which is, which is, I really want to acknowledge because you've opened that up. I'm wondering what's, and we're talking about what's important to you, what's important to him, do you think, as one of these tribal leaders? Yeah, I think it's probably the need to feel important and be recognised as important. I think, I suspect that one of the things here is that he's very, was a lot of pride in what he does, but there's probably some quite powerful personal emotions in this. Yeah, I don't like that because you're thinking that if I put myself into his shoe, what would be important to him, and I'm wondering also about what is he afraid of as well? Yes, which would be it, would be brilliant question, there'd be an extraordinary question because he's the fearless, and there's a cliché phrase, the fearless leader, but that's how he would see himself, I think, so if I could get him to open up or even think about what he afraid of here, that would be a great coaching question to ask him. Again, I can hear the nerve, it's not for the habitation, but that's actually probably the roots of this, you know, what he afraid of. And it's probably losing things, status, reputation, I don't know what exactly, but probably sensual, I like what I have, I'm proud of it, if I think it works, if you change it, I might lose something, maybe it won't be as good or, I don't know, but I could imagine some probably not quite courageous enough to ask me what you're afraid of, but I could imagine asking a question, what do you think you might lose? If you supported this and we implemented a new strategy and looked 10 to 20 years into the future with what our education might like, what do you think you might lose or we might lose by taking that approach? Yeah, and I was just wondering, if you were to save him now, as a, you know, you saw him as a previously as a formidable opponent, but if you would have seen him now as, you know, a man at the end of his career, a lot of pride and a lot of achievement, then a lot to lose, how does that change anything for you at all? Well, actually, yes, because I do think about people a lot, and I have a lot of empathy. So I want, you know, it's imagining it like that, so the role is just deeply unsettling for him and could honestly result in him worrying about losing what they currently have, but would be a really helpful reframe for me as well. You know, I'd approach this conversation very much more simplistically and very much more with inquiry. Yeah, I got it. Yeah, I got it. Yeah, I got it. You know, just that thought is calming because that's such a more instructive way of thinking about this. So you mentioned, if the words you've mentioned are confidence, with empathy, sympathetically. Yeah, yeah, which is my natural style, you know, that was the most comfortable for me because I think it all, well, for me, I think it gets the best results because this is all about a person and how they're feeling and re-acting, and so I think, you know, I think, you know, for those shoes, you say, and just thinking how this might feel for them, I think it's very important. It seems a lot calmer to me when you say that it seems like they're more natural, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so how would you summarize, then, Josh, what you're taking out of our conversation say that? Well, actually, you've completely changed, you've completely changed, helped me change the way I see this and think about it from something that was really quite worrying and making me feel anxious and was, in my mind, going to be, what it, you know, wanted to be, it would end up as this struggle, this winner loser, and to actually looking, looking beyond that and saying, well, let's stop this person doing this, so saying, well, let's understand why this person is doing this, what's motivating them, what's driving this, and then, so being in their shoes, and then saying, well, what if I could harness this person's seniority experience, powerful legal leadership, what is that person actually, through having that open conversation, become a champion, and now the whole thing feels like an opportunity rather than a threat. You're listening to the Open Door Coaching Coaching Cafe podcast, and for more information on programs run by Open Door Coaching, head to our website at opendoorcoaching.com.au. Now back to the podcast. So welcome back everybody. I thought we would stop the recording there because what we've heard is probably enough for today to do brief in the essence of time, and also, so what happens next is that there's the coach wraps up in terms of the next steps to take, how will you approach it, etc. So you've probably heard the most of what we need for today's session anyway. So we would like to do brief this quickly and feel free to put some messages into the chat box with us as well, and we want to think about this in terms of those core competency-maintaining presence, listening actively, evoking awareness, and facilitating client growth. And just so you know, if you're listening to this online, the silences are actually intentional, so there's pauses there that you're here, and also you might hear a couple of skips and a couple of jumpovers. Don't worry about that because they're actually intentional edits for privacy reasons. Bridget, let me hand it over to you just in the time that we have available for a debrief. What really stands out for you in terms of what we should be listening for with this recording? Absolutely. Well, I'm madly scribbling things down as I'm listening to now. So the first thing I want to highlight if we're going to have a look at each core competency, core competency, five maintains presence, a lot of space was prevalent there, which is really great. And I like the way that you're actually responding to the whole of the person. So not only what the situation, but significantly who as well. So the what and the who, you were really demonstrated curiosity to learn about the coachy and what was happening for him and as I said, allowed for a lot of silence, pause and reflection. So maintaining presence was really, really stood out for me through that session. Would you like me to continue to the next one or would you like to make a comment? No, continue on. Okay. Core competency number six, your observations were directly customised, if you like, but by using what you had learned about what your coachy was saying, about who the coachy was and his situation, I really like the way you were able to observe energy shifts as well, which is a really key part of listening actively. So you picked up on that a couple of times, so that was really really key in terms of that listening actively. And again, using words that the client had used, you've picked up on words, you're feeding back what you heard, that active listening, you really allowed the space and state out of the space to allow him to think and reflect on what was happening for him. And also you reflected back for an understanding, clarity of understanding. So again, listening actively and communicating effectively was clear there. The one that stood out really significantly for me was around evoke awareness. So that core competency number seven, you know, things like, what if, you know, what if you embrace the provocative, which was a really good reframe and an opportunity for your coachy to shift perspective, you know, what if and also harnessing, you know, the word of harnessing and creating that new visual for your coachy as well. The other shift in position that I really enjoyed was what's important to him, do you think? So that shifting of position and what is he afraid of? So supporting your coachy to really shift positions to look at it from a different angle. And you really ask questions to, I guess, shift current ways of thinking. So for the coachy to explore what they're currently thinking and feeling, you know, their beliefs and values and needs if you like, as well as exploring beyond where they're thinking. So your questions shifted your coachy beyond current thinking. So they're really thinking and feeling about themselves as well as their situation and what that meant for them, which is really key to evoking awareness. You shared with no attachment to observations and intuitions, which is really key part of evoking awareness. If you were to see him now as a man, you know, I said dot, dot, dot, pride, you know, with a lot to lose, does that change anything? I thought that was a fantastic question there. Again, supporting your coachy to shift position beyond where they're currently thinking to thinking of new evolved ways around the situation. So really brilliant evidence there of evoking awareness. And for call competency number eight, facilitating client growth, I enjoyed the way that you invited your coachy to explore their learning during the session. I liked the question, actually, how would you summarize what you were taking out of this conversation so far? So you know, a fantastic question there. You invited your coachy to really explore or consider how they would use their new learning moving forward. So really supporting taking some action. So facilitating that client growth beyond the evoking awareness, but what are they going to do now with that awareness moving forward? So a really great demonstration of competencies, five, six, seven and eight, really rich full of evidence is what I heard. Yeah, thank you, bridge. It's a really fantastic summary. And as I was listening to it again, probably for the fifth or sixth time, I was writing down that questions as well. So yes, I'm the coach, but I was actually writing down the questions that the coach asked as I do every time I listen to your recordings as well. And I think what stood out for me is everything you've said. And the coach being able to use that space of curiosity without being attached. So the really nice thing that I noticed is that the coachy actually really embraces those what if questions as part of who he is as a leader. So the coach, holding that for the coachy, it's like the coach is holding a light for who the coachy wants to be as a leader using his actual natural tendencies and his words. So it kind of felt right, I remember in the moment, from an instincts point of view, to evocal awareness about the coachy using his words about who he wants to be. And I'm not sure if I'm making sense here, but it's those nuances of the maintaining presence and that was used to actually evoke that awareness. Absolutely. And what's key there, too, is if you listen carefully, you can hear the change of tone and the energy in the coachy, too, when you present these what ifs and feeding it back in. It was almost like the confidence was building in the moment. Yeah, and that's the critical thing about listening to what is being said by the actual coachy, but also what is not being said. Now, I was seeing him live on the video when we were coaching, but it's what's not being said that is actually linking to who he wants to be as a leader in this situation. And honestly, it's a massive acknowledgement to Josh as well, because not only are we listening to the coach here and how a coachy, but we are picking up so many lessons from the actual coachy himself. Like if we're experiencing a conflict within the workplace, wouldn't it be lovely to have a view of the world like Josh was able to explore for himself as a leader? So I was learning lessons from the coach, but I'm definitely learning lessons from the coachy. And why that's important is because when the coach is able to be vulnerable and open and maintain that presence, we learn from our coaches as well. So I thought as we're listening to this recording, that's something else that we might be able to draw our attention to as well. Well everyone, please feel free to listen to the recording again, listen to the whole recording again with those ICF core competencies in front of you. And we're thinking about what can we actually learn across the core competencies. And if you're like me, I love writing down all the questions. So the next time I have the opportunity to coach, if it feels right, I've learned something from the coaching conversation and I might roll out that question if it feels right in the moment. So everything you're hearing is part of our certificate for and our diploma and think about how we can go under the surface to explore more with the coachy. So feel free to reach out to us again if you have any needs or if you want your people to be coached. We're here to support and assist you. So with that in mind, everyone, thank you for joining us for today's coaching cafe. We hope you've got a lot out of that coaching experience. As always, we say, please reach out if you need to and as always, enjoy your coaching. So we'll say goodbye for now. Thanks for listening to this episode of the coaching cafe podcast. You can watch the full video of this podcast on our website. I'll put a link in the show tonight. We'll see you at the next coaching cafe. (upbeat music)