Chico Requena - Vida Resuelta

(upbeat music) Come Dicentral Podcast. (upbeat music) (audience applauding) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) (audience applauding) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) (speaking in foreign language) (audience applauding) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) (speaking in foreign language) (audience applauding) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (audience laughing) And from there we started the dialogue, eh? Are you sure that José Luis Moreno is looking with other eyes? To the wild wild animals. Are you sure? Are you sure? He says... He says, "Well, in Eastern Europe, they are tall, they are rough, they are strong. Uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh, uuuuh." I tell you one thing, after watching the last show of José Luis Moreno, they wanted to give him a beating. I don't want to even think about it when those wild wild animals came in. It's not for less. And I tell you one thing. You start to analyze it, you start to analyze it, and you say, "Why these radical Islamists killed comicals?" Fuck, because I think that the Arabs are trying to recover the accounts in Spain. Of course, of course, because the Arabs have to have architecture, poetry, literature. Music, instruments, all the most complicated things, we owe it to the Arabs. It's true that there is no Arabs who conduct well. It's also true. They are more complicated subjects, let's not say to land planes, they nail it there. But hey... I remember the 11th of September, I was at home with my father eating, looking at the TV. When we saw Matías Prad with a small screen over him, where there was... a tower of two, huming, a black smoke. My father looked at me and said, "There they are freezing fish." I said, "Hush." I said, "Well, it's burning, dad, it's burning." My five minutes had passed when the second plane made the second tower. "Cataplan!" And my father said, "How are the Yankees?" "They are like Carlos Fabra, they take you to an airport in any place." I said, "No, that's not it, dad. That's not it, I think they are talking about something else." How curious! Not even five minutes had passed. When they already knew who it was. It seemed to me, in my head, I imagined it like this. "Alabín!" "Alaban!" "Alabín!" "Bombán!" "Bisladen!" "Bisladen!" "Expert in derribar!" "Bien!" Of course! I mean... At that moment, when the towers came down, I felt an attack of solitude with the peonies from New York's bathroom. I've changed a bathroom for a shower dish. This is the third day I'm getting out of bed. I don't want to imagine what they had to take from there. That had to be incredible. Of course. Of course, of course, that was tough. And at that moment, in which we are seeing all that, and you have a bit of an inter-cut body, you get into my grandmother's side of the living room and start... "Give me a hand, kid, give me a hand, give me a hand, give me a hand!" "Child, give me a hand, give me a hand and I'll start with one and a half." I say, "Grandma!" "Grandma, don't press, I'll take you in the middle, your age doesn't do autosies." "Don't press, grandma!" Of course. It's normal to be a fucking John Key of one and a half. It's that they have the name of Camillo, Juan and a half, fuck, of the whole life. It's a perfect name for the issue of the groggy. Of course, yes, besides Juan and a half is the only TV presenter who works in a very clear rubric. People who use taca-taca, children or old people. The rest doesn't even talk to him. But it's just that he doesn't even talk to him. He has it very clear. I remember that moment in which my father and I were there, boicoteing to the grandmother, we were looking at the TV and he said, "Phew, the photo of Bill Laden. Moro type 1, perigita and turban." My father was looking at the mother who gave birth to the Arabs. I said, "Dad, don't get hot. Your mom is an Arab." "Polashiamo de casa!" He said, "Dad, who cooks tomorrow? Even the eggs are from the cuckoo." "Dad, dad, that the Junkies are capable of taking an eye to get you both out." "Don't you believe what the TV says? Don't you believe it? Of course, because they tell you from a very young age that the opposite of love is hatred." And that's a lie. The opposite of love is fear. The hatred is the way the cowards love them. And we've recorded this in the skin. At that time, someone who knows a lot about hatred was ruling. George Bush, a son of a bitch in MP3. With a terabyte of bad milk, he compressed. He said, "I'm going to take Bill Laden. I'm going to take Bill Laden, I'm going to take him." He didn't have the guts to find him. And at that point, they said, "Shh." I have it clear. We're going to put in the white house a black one. Because where does a black one look good? In a white house, damn it. With his black family and his two white canyons to highlight. A black one, not a black one, anyone. A lawyer from Honolulu-Lulu-Lulu. We all know how the jurisprudence is in Honolulu-Lulu. How are you going to get into jail with a guy from Bermuda with a bouquet of flowers in your fucking life? You had to put Obama back in the way he was. And that's where they put him, the guy. Because, of course, he goes unnoticed. You have to go for an Arab. A black guy from Honolulu-Lulu-Lulu, damn it. Of course, yes, and he goes to Obama. Black, in the white house, he takes the red phone. He calls Gordon Brown. He says, "Are the special bodies?" He says, "Yes." He says, "Are the cells?" He says, "The cells." He says, "Put them on." He says, "How are you going to get it tomorrow?" He goes to Biladen. "Oh, Mr. President, tomorrow we're not done." "Tomorrow we have a wedding of my cousin." "If that's better on Monday..." "Come on, it's Monday, damn it. I'll fuck you up, some people call you special." "Come on, it's Monday, Monday, Monday." "Do you know where you had to go to Biladen?" "Where?" He says, "To the place of that man who has a name for a street restaurant." "What's his name?" "Kazakhistan, Kazakhistan." There, there. Perfect. He says, "And how are we going to get there?" "Yes." He says, "To where?" "Oh, there, in ultrasonic planes." "These are planes that have nothing to do with it." "This is the manhattan attitude on Saturday." "And it goes so fast that it goes to Kazakhistan on Monday." "They make it an hour a day." "That's why you're not going to charge it now, okay?" "Okay, okay." "Now, to go back to Biladen once you're dead." " calmer." "Go on, there's no hurry." "There's no hurry." "That's right, that's right. I'm asking you, please." "Don't go there and take the DNI, okay?" "No, because everyone remembers, right?" "Besides, that scumbag, that's what I had." "That's what I had when I fell on the twin towers." "That's the only thing I have left." "The DNI of the terrorists!" "Because the DNI is intransferable and indestructible." "If they had made the DNI's tower of material, the planes would have been overturned." "They would have been overturned." "The only thing that destroys a DNI is the cocaine." "Everyone knows that." "It's the only thing." "If the planes were cocaine, then yes." "They would be overturned by any tower." "What a moment, what a moment, we live in the most magical moment." "And nothing, there were the seals that fell on the twin towers." "In Biladen's farm, at the farm of the Pumba." "They killed Biladen, they killed his dog, Chino." "They killed Biladen, they killed his dog, Chispa, a beautiful turk." "They killed a sister-in-law, who was learning to do the pinching line." "A disaster." "A butcher." "A smell that you have burned, horrible." "At that moment, they took Biladen, they put him in the boat." "And quietly, for Manhattan, there is no hurry." "And there they presented themselves." "These gentlemen, with that dilated bike, which Valencian deserves in his age." "Do you know why these people have the arm like this?" "To read great works." "The Quijote, Dostoyevsky, Mr. Hyde, Hitler, anything, right?" "They stick to the good literature." "Yes sir, they are very, very rich people." "Yes, they get too much." "And then they arrived at the oval despach, with this painting." "Mr. President, yes." "They say, shh, shh." "We killed Biladen." "And Obama did." "Because the blacks celebrated him dancing." "And Obama was left here." "And he says..." "And where is he?" "And he says..." "He has not fallen into the water." "And he goes to the water!" "And he goes to the water, Mr. President, to the water." "We were going to the sea in the boat, and since we were in a horse season, we put the fishing rod, Antonio went up for a beer, we took a fat wave, we saw a joke, and Biladen into the water, between the clothes that were made of cotton, the hair of the beard and the 20 shots of the weight, he exploded." "You are telling me that you are going to fall Biladen into the water." "And he says, as he is hearing it." "And he says, "Dostoyevsky, I brought 300 kilos of horse." "I have a black face!" "How do I tell this to Armando?" "Tell the truth, Cone, tell the truth." "He has not fallen." "And Obama goes out to give the press wheel in person." "Not like Rajoy, who gives it in a TV, inside a TV, inside a TV." "The day he gets us wrong, we are going to have to recintonize." "Let's not." "He gives it in person with his two black eggs." "And Obama goes out." "As we are tonight here, with the press wheel there assembled." "His two gorillas next door." "I don't want any questions." "I don't want any questions." "I don't want any." "He goes out and says..." "We have killed..." "We have, as if we were all going to kill him." "We have." "We have killed Biladen." "And he does the press wheel like this." "Follow me." "We have a press wheel applause, not the Pantoja concert." "Come up." "He has the new hands." "And that's it." "That's it, Obama says..." "We have killed him." "Thank you very much." "And go out to an old lady who says..." "The Washington Post." "Mr. President." "We wanted to propose it to the second Nobel of Peace." "The first one was given because it was made by Jono Lululu." "And there everyone has one." "They are very peaceful." "Everyone has their Nobel of Peace in Jono Lululu." "They say we are going to give him the second one." "And that's what Obama says." "Well, I take him." "No problem, of course." "In other words, a black person kills an Arab." "And they give him a Nobel of Peace." "What a good idea, isn't it?" "We go out all night to kill Chinese people." "And if not a Nobel that gives us a concession, I don't know." "I think it's something like that." "Why not?" "Of course." "Of course it is." "And that's what the president says." "And with this I'm leaving." "I'm leaving." "And I'm not going to take a half turn to get another one." "And he says..." "Morenito leaves Jono Lululu." "Don't be in a hurry." "Where are you going?" "And that's what Obama says." "He turns white, I don't know." "But he does." "Did you bring saliva?" "He looked at you and said..." "Do you like the horse?" "He said, 'Because you're going to get fed up.'" "You're going to get fed up." "He says, 'In truth, in truth, we have thrown him into the water.'" "It's a tradition of theirs." "My father, watching TV, says..." "Oh, man, please." "Don't ask for fresh water." "You're going to want dead water." "That's impossible." "I say, Dad, there was no one." "They've made it all up." "The other day a friend told me." "He says, "Requena, when you record this for TV..." "you have to be very careful." "It will be that someone doesn't understand what you're saying." "Because of their lack of humor." "And when you go out of some act..." "you get killed." "And I say, 'Are you right?'" "I say, 'But at least that way..." "I will have a better life.'" "Requena, thank you very much." "Good night."