Chelsea Handler Found a Better Way To Reach People

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Investigations with these conditions before injection are at highest risk. Side effects may include allergic reactions, neck and injection site pain, fatigue, and headache. A lurcher reactions can include rash, welts, asthma symptoms, and dizziness. Don't receive Botox if there's a skin infection. Tell your doctor your medical history, muscle or nerve conditions, including ALS Lou Gehrig's Disease, Myosthenia Gravis, or Lambert Eaton Syndrome, and medications, including botulinum toxins as these may increase the risk of serious side effects. Why wait? Ask your doctor. I try to really think harder about why people are lurchers. You are the first white woman to be on this show. Wow. How was it? Fresh. What? Fresh. Did you make this food? I did. Oh, really? Yeah. Doesn't seem like it. I don't say that to be disrespectful, but I do. Doug, who's here and aided on your sofa probably, but everyone would be nicer if everyone took a little microdose of something every single day. I haven't seen a dog in a grocery store. What do you grocery store? That's a great question. This is a great story. What is up, neighbors? We've got the one and only Chelsea Ham are pulling up today. Now she is a seven time New York Times bestselling author. She's an award-winning comedian and a talk show legend who's been making us laugh and think for years. She's about to hit the road again for her high and mighty tour and is going to be delivering that honesty and that humor like only she can. And I bet she's the kind of house guest who will tell you exactly how she sees it. Come on in. Come on in. I'm coming. I'm coming. I'm coming. Here I am. Here I am. What's up, lady? Oh, my God. Did you prepare Preparato all this food? You know, a little Preparato. We've got more on the way. Sorry. Sometimes I break into Spanish, mid-conversation. Preparato. Fresh off of my Orca. I don't know. They speak fluent Spanish. So it's just words that I throw out. I did it. It leaves you in their present tense. Thank you. Well, actually, that was the past. Anyway, good catch. Good catch. It's one o'clock in the afternoon and I just want to say that I am down to fuck. I mean party. I am down to party. Sorry. I got my little, you know, my. No, no, yeah. I'm a little jet lagged. I came in from Spain like Friday. So it's Tuesday. What day is it? I don't know what day it is, but I know that my words. My word retrieval is still a little bit off. So you might have to bear with me. I'm sure once I have a cocktail, it will all click. Yeah. Because usually when I'm too sober or something, things get a little messy. You know what I'm saying? It's a little weird. You're crunchy. Yes. We'll smooth this thing out. That's right. That's right. You're taking my language. You see? I know that you, for the longest, were a vodka girl. I was. And you have made this change over to gin. Yeah. Yeah. What was the gin change? Okay. Well, I started taking a Zempick. When everyone started taking a Zempick, right? Okay. And it makes you lose your appetite for whatever you like the most, which in my case was vodka. So all of a sudden vodka. Vodka. Vodka was disgusting. A regular person would be like, no more alcohol. But I was like, I will not give up. I'm going to find another alcohol that I can have a good time with. And that's where I let, when I landed on tank array, which is gin. The gin I've been drinking. So we're right on the morning. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So I figured we'd do a gin and soda. Yeah. But you know, here we'd like to transition things. I just see one option. Okay. I just see one of those funky lacroix, lacroix. Yeah. You love them so much. I don't like the strawberry peach. No. What? It's better than that lemon shell. I'll try the strawberry peach. What about elder flour and or lime usue? Oh, I like elder flour, but that's tonic. So it's super sweet. So let's stick with the soda water. Strike one, two, three. I thought you. I knew that you were going to stick with the soda water. I love it. Did you know that? Is that why you run on these other options? I just wanted you to have options. I didn't want you to think I was like, you know, so like close-minded or yeah, yeah. Like, or you know, without resource. Thank you. Thank you for presenting with resource. With resource. I appreciate that. Yeah, so I'm very excited. I was going to use a jigger. Don't do that. Okay. And let's just, I'll tell you when. Let's just go to this area over here. Okay. These are nice glasses. And by the way, this place is rad. Thank you. I appreciate that. I want you to try this. Okay, wait, wait, wait. Let me just examine this. Hold on one second. Strawberry in a drink. Yeah, I don't know the flavor. I don't know the jigger. Let me smell it. Maybe I'll have a little. You know, the other thing about La Croix or La Croix or however you say it is that they don't, it's the carbonation isn't as tight as I like it. I like it topochico because it's like. Yeah, yeah. It's a little loose. Yeah, and I like it to hurt my throat when I drink it. A hard bubble. Yeah, hard bubble followed by a soft bubble. You know. Not to be confused with anything else that's hard and soft around here. Okay. But talking about the cheese, everybody. Talking about the cheese. I'm going to do the lemon cello. I'm staying with a friend and all she does is buy. My house is under construction and my friend, all she does is buy the worst flavors of La Croix. Not dissimilar to what you are presenting me with in the refrigerator. And of course, I'm staying with her so I can't say anything. Right. So he's like, do you want a sparkling water? And I'm like, not what you got. I don't understand. Listen, I totally understand. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Let's do it. Hmm. Nothing to get you ready for the holidays like a good stiff. Oh, beginning ready for the holidays. This is holiday season, right? This is where we are. Sorry, I never know what day it is or what month we're in. We are post-election. Post-election. Post-election. Post-election. Post-election. Post-election. Post-election. Post-election. We have two female governors. She's a first female governor, a Democratic governor. Yeah. So it's just exciting and it brings hope back into the world. I'm right. I want people to be happy and prosperous and nice to each other. That's literally it. Yeah, I have to change my whole personality to become that person. And I've done it so you can fucking do it too. What do you mean you can change your whole personality? I've become a lot more, you know, a lot nicer, a lot less biting as I've gotten older and more mature. Yeah. I've just become a little bit, I wouldn't say softer, but a nice, more refined person. It goes back to the discovery you had in therapy, I think, about empathy. Yes. When you can see yourself and other people in other situations, it does change your outlook a little bit. But not only to see yourself in others, to imagine what someone who you have nothing in common with might be going through. Like, you've never been in that situation and to actually empathize and think, what would it be like to be that man who just lost his job and has two children to support going through a divorce? Like to really be empathetic. It doesn't happen easily all the time. Sorry, that's my Uber. It doesn't. No, I think that's our key, that's our keystime. It doesn't happen. I'm going to keep talking to you. Are you in frame? I'll pretend like you're standing there. No, there's no, no. Actually, would you mind just taking off? I've got this, you can leave. Anyway, what I was saying was, once you're a better person, everything falls together better. What do you believe? So it's not something that comes so, like, it's not like I look at everyone and I'm so empathetic, but I definitely have, and tuned into that now. No, maybe if someone acts a certain way, it's because one, two, three things are happening in their life. I suppose so, what the fuck, and be over it? Yeah, instead of being like, that's an idiot, fuck that guy, he's a loser. I try to really think harder about why people are losers. The high-mighty tour, I feel like, I would imagine this is a tour that you're like, this is a dream come true. I've been waiting to be able to have these conversations, this kind of stuff. I'm ready to spread joy and laughter and sunshine. I am very excited. Every time I tour, it is, in the last couple of years since I've become more mature. Once I hit 40, now I'm 50, that 10-year growth spread really changed my life and changed my vibe. Really? Yeah. So, me and now when I go on tour, it's just like bringing joy and happiness to people and sharing my most personal stories, whether they're, you know, embarrassing or not embarrassing. Like, it doesn't matter. Yeah. You know, I talk a lot about my family. I talk a lot about my dogs. They're always a big part of my life. You brought Doug today, I love it. I did bring Doug. Doug, where are you? Just walking around. Just hearing it on your sofa, probably. Oh, okay. Does that make sense? Somebody get down my side. Someone just took fucking the house. But it's not going to be a big deal. Okay, yeah, because you can buy another kind of spot. I could just send you a sofa. I mean, Doug, we have a bunch of extra ones. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A blue suede though. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I saw it. So, yeah, I know. I'm excited to go on tour. It's called the High and Mighty Tour. And that, I mean, that's just a part of what keeps me engaged with people. It really. The feed and that energy. Yes. Because I know a lot of people know who I am. But when I go on tour, I know a lot of people know who I am. get to see those people that have given me my career and given me such like good luck and fortune in my life, like I feel very grateful and responsible as being a purveyor of joy. - I'm gonna tell you, it's no wonder, no surprise that your middle name is Joy, 'cause I think it was on you from the very beginning and to know that you have honed this and taken seriously that responsibility, it's pretty incredible. I've seen you live and when I tell you like did not stop, at one point I was like, I have to go to the restroom because I have to, my cheeks and my face hurt. It was crying all the time. - Yeah, you came to the plantages, I think. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was my last tour and that was-- - Oh my God. - That was so fun too. It's so, I mean, it's so much fun because I never get, you know, I never run out of material because I have so much material for my own life. - Time to go for a spin. - Mm, that's one of the best lines I have ever heard about masturbation in my entire life. - Thank you, thank you. - Where can people get, I mean, if you want to get tickets, how do I-- - Joshyander.com. - Bam, baby. - Don't go to those big, like, don't go to the scalpers, don't go to ticket master, go straight to my website and then we will take care of you. - That part. Okay, so with that in mind, Joy and my, we're gonna do a little bit of a, get to know you game called Match My Move. - I grade it, I love it. - 'Cause we've got some situations here. - Can I go first? - Yeah. - Absolutely. - Okay, well, I already know, okay, hold on. Okay, okay. - You get to read that left. - Yeah, fair foot on a flight. - Like, what the fuck and angry at you? - I'm just angry. (laughing) - I don't care why, what happened to you? No empathy. - What is it about a flight that people feel like this is the perfect place to have naked ass feet? - What is it about a person that thinks that their foot can be out and that they can be touching it in between its toes? - Yes, that is. - What told you? That was okay to do. You know what you can do is take your feet out any time you feel like it. - 'Cause it's, no, no, no, no, no. - Respect the plane and respect flight attendants. - Hey, cover that shit up. - Disgusting. - I don't care how cute your feet might be. - No, no, no, no, no, it's not about that. It's not about how cute your feet are, okay? - No, it's gross. - It's unsanitary. First of all, your fingers are gross too, but you need those more than you need. Are you using your foot for something to pick up a glass or a tray? I mean, if you are, then you know, they all mean, and you obviously are missing a hand. But most cases, you don't need your feet out. - Right. - The only exception is if you don't have any hands. Okay, have we clarified and cleared that up? You know what else I don't like about flying? - Please don't. - Well, I love flying. But I don't like when the pilot gets on the loudspeaker and it's so loud. - Yes, and they're just talking. - And they won't shut the mouth about the altitude and about things we're gonna pass by. I'm like, buddy, I don't care. - I don't care, we can't say it. I don't know, Rushmore. I hope they blow that place up. Like that is not representative of how I feel. I don't, unless applied over like the 49th parallel, is that even a thing? - I don't know. - I don't know. - I don't know. - But I don't need to see it. - But I don't care. - And I don't need you to tell me about it. I just wanna know, chicken or beef, and go to bed. - Exactly. - Bringing your dog to the grocery store. - I would say that that's a negative, a big negative. Okay, thank you. - Yeah. - Unless it's an emergency of a sort. - What? The dog is an emergency at the grocery store. - No, maybe it's your dog is in the car, and it's like 95 degrees, and you're picking him up from the kennel, and you have to stop and get groceries. Then I would say maybe, but even then, I would work my way around it. But if you were someone that didn't have a way to work around it, you could get by. You can't loiter, but you could just say, I had to pick up an item. Is there anyone who could just hold my dog while I run in, or is it okay if I just run in? I'll be five minutes. - But you know, we live in Los Angeles, where you go to a grocery store, and it's dogs just in the produce section, like. - I have never seen a dog in a grocery store. - Do you grocery shop? - That's a great question. Let's go to the next one. Okay. Trying to speak the local language when you travel. - Just. - Loathe, loathe, I do this. Or I will do this, I don't even know. I always-- - The local language? - Yes. - Yes, I mean a little bit. Thank you for the buy, hello. - Also there, I want, I'd like to have-- - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Okay, so we agree on that. - We agree on that. - Okay, I feel like we're gonna agree on a lot of things. These are my cards, by the way. Do you need to borrow one? - Yes, we're just, it's our cards actually. - Okay, no extra. (laughing) Okay. - Okay, here we go. - X is as friends. I don't really care about that. So I'll just do the middle, because I don't have a strong reaction to that. You're angry about it? - I just, X is as friends, if everybody's single, great. - Okay. - Yeah. - I think X is as friends, like we're, oh, I'm just gonna go hang out with my X. - Yeah, yeah, okay, that's fair. - What? - That's fair. We're, we're, what? - It's all of us going hang out with your X. - On my podcast, sometimes people will call in, women always, it's always a woman. They will call in and say, oh, my, my, my boyfriend is, hangs out with his ex-girlfriend. Like, that's happened a couple times, and I'm always like, definitely not. - Definitely not. - Not if they're hanging out without you. - Absolutely not. - But if you're all hanging out together, I would always say that's fine. - Right, and it's fine. - And also, not always fine. It's like, you're not best friends with your X. - Otherwise, you would still be together. - My issue with X is that, like, I can't look or talk to any of the men I've dated once we're done for about six to seven years. I don't wanna see their faces. - What? - Why? - Because it comes to a point where I'm so ict out that the relationship has to end. I need a long dry spell of no contact. - You need to miss you. - So that I can not miss you, so that I can regain respect. - Damn. - Yeah. - Even if you want it to be casual, a relationship, it's usually not on one person's behalf. You know what I mean? - I do. - And if we break up, that's me saying, I'm not even gonna casually have sex with you anymore, then you did something that I find ict. - Too ict to forget. - Too ict to forget. Talking politics on a date. - Listen, I can't help myself. I love talking politics. - Really? - My favorite? - Yes. My favorite thing, 'cause then we're aligned. - So you're-- - I'm happy about that. My favorite activities are marijuana, alcohol, politics, and exercise. - I'm with that. That's not a bad list. - I wanna talk all about those things. - Okay, that was easy. Separating from the travel group for an individual perk, like an airport lounge or first class. - This is a good question. - Right? - Yeah. - 'Cause you know how many times you travel with a group, and you're like, "I got miles, you know, I'm definitely "up great." - I've definitely done both. I've stayed with the group. No, I think it's this. - What? - No, no, no, no, I'm gonna explain. I've done both. I've definitely separated from the group, and I've definitely looped in the group and just paid for them to come into the lounge. - Yep, same. - Like, I have an example. - Okay. - I went to go to somewhere in Canada a few weeks ago to have a girl's weekend with my friends from Whistler Canada. And I was gonna fly directly into the place we were going. And they wanted to take, you know, a car, two fairies and a three hour car ride. And I did that with them. - What? - Because it was too expensive for them to fly there. So I did take two fairies and a car, because-- - But the whole time you're thinking we could be there. - No, I just said I'm gonna be a team player this weekend. You brought me on a good day. - Yeah. - Okay. "Letting the dog lick your face." - Mmm. This is a good one too. This is very good. - You have had how many, how many dogs? - My dog does not lick. My dog does not lick. That's what I put in his DNA file. - I'm with you. - And he was a rescue, by the way. That was a joke. (laughing) - I bought one dog in my life. I bought one dog and I returned him. - As far as, like, from a breeder or something like that. - Yeah, I bought a Bernice mountain dog or Bernice. Bernice mountain dog and he did not work out. Something was wrong with him and he got returned. - You say, what is my return balance? - Well, I only rest two dogs. And I, but I do not like dogs to lick my face. - No. - The other thing about dogs looking your face is, it's not the other thing, it's the main thing. (laughing) - It's the only thing. They are licking and sniffing piss and asshole all day long. - Oh, dang. - You cannot let them lick your face. - I'm gonna tell you something. I've had a friend come over to this house and we have two big dogs and they're up 'cause I didn't want to know shit. - Right, right, right, right. - Michael B. Jordan, Himsworth is an asshole sometimes. He's the youngest and he's-- - His name is Michael B. Jordan, Himsworth. - He did it, not me. - Who, Michael B. Jordan or Himsworth? (laughing) - No, the dog, the dog chose the name. - Oh, he did. - Yeah. - You one of those people who thinks your dog chooses names. - Yeah, aren't you? - No, I don't believe my dog. No, dog came with his name was Doug Filippin or something. - Doug, what? - They were Filipino, the people I rescued him from. And they're like, oh, he has a Filipino name and it's Doug Filippin. I'm like, that's gonna be Doug, I'm rolling it, that's a rolling off my time, Filippin, you know? No offense to the Filipino, I'm thanks to the dog, but I don't understand what that is. - Doug Filippin's every time I call him. - Yeah. - Doug is perfect. - It's fine. So I have a friend who comes over here and they, like, it's like kisses in the face. Like, kisses in the face and I'm like, I, and this is why I know why you're single. That smell, and to know. - I don't like to smell people or I don't like to smell sense or breath on anyone. If I can smell your breath, you're too close. - It's too close. - Now we're something's off with you. And you need to get a tongue scraper probably. I want people to know about dental hygiene. I can't forgive that. It's an unforgivable thing. - Wearing athleisure wear to dinner. I mean, I feel like in today's times, it's not like the airport. Like I would say to the airport, I'm fine with this. - Really? - Yeah, because, There is style that you can wear that and be stylish at dinner. Like, oh, you're against it. - I mean, at dinner, I feel like when we were in color with my pants. - What if you look cute, like not at least you're okay. Maybe I just immediately touched on my mind. There's a detest track pants with like, you know, three stripes down and I saw this cool girl earlier today and she was wearing that and she was wearing cool kicker, like kicks, kickers. - Kickers, that's what I'm saying. - Like a cool kicker. - This is me and she had a cool shirt on and I was like, that's sexy, I was like, I'm gonna wear that on stage. So when I saw a fleasure wear, I immediately went to that look, but I want to take it back. You're right. - Yeah, 'cause like leggings with camel toe or like. - Like, I want a little bit of effort. - Yeah, I know. - When we go to dinner. - Yeah, you can wear sweatpants. And men, by the way, shouldn't wear sweatpants at all. - Wow. - I mean, at your house, maybe, if you're alone with your lover. - Okay, just in wait. So we've got some quiche going right now. - Oh, really? Look, I love quiche. My mom used to make me quiche all the time. - Is that right? - I mean, not for me, but yeah, for the family, I love it. - What's your favorite? What's your favorite? - Nike, egg, bacon, mushroom, anything. - With that spinach and mushroom and Lorraine, which is ham and cheese. - Yeah, I like that. - No way sweet. - Did you make this food? - I did. - Oh, really? - What? - It just seems like it was prepped for you. I'm just calling out bullshit when I see it. - You, what you're saying is it looks too good. - Yeah. - It looks. - Yeah, that's exactly what I'm saying. - Yeah, cheers. - Hmm. (upbeat music) - Thank you for this food. Should we say a prayer? - Should we? - I don't know. Do you believe in God? I mean, I kinda do sometimes when I need him. (laughing) Thank you for our food anyway. - Yes. - And I hope that you exist. - Same. You reveal all the time that you do and sometimes, oh yes, okay man. - Okay. - Or whatever. - Say your part. - Still talking. - Thank you. (laughing) Thank you for the food and we're so excited. - Mom, if you're up there, I love you. Doug, don't even think about it. Okay, we're on camera, act like you know. - No, Doug is like, don't you act like it's any different than it would be at home. Do you feed your dogs on the plate? - No. - No, right? - Same person, I don't want them looking my face. Get some manners. - Wait, so we're just talking about your, if your mom, if you're up there, like what, do you feel like when you die, that it's just the end? I know you've said before, you don't really care, you're not really afraid of what happens after. Like it's just like, get on and get over with it. - Yeah, I think that none of us know and none of us will ever know. I mean, but there are a lot of like, you know, past life experiences that are worthwhile. - Yeah. - I mean, like, I'll do anything. I'm a very open about like psychics or mediums or like past life, past life aggressions, I find that to be a little bit one step beyond my, like that involves magic. You know, like you're gonna take this dust of nine and turn it into another person, like you kinda lost me with the past life aggressions. - Have you done like, have you had one? Have you had like a- - I've done a lot of things, so I'll probably say yes. Some of those things I don't remember. But I read this book and maybe it was many lives, many masters or maybe it was a book by Laura Lynch, actually called Signs. I can't remember, but there was one chapter in a book where there was this three-year-old boy who was speaking Italian or speaking Spanish, like he's not as native tongue and his parents didn't speak the language. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - And he was like, I have a wife and I have two children and they live in this village in Italy and Da-Da-Da. And the parents, once he was six and he kept talking about it and spoke fluent Italian, went in and researched it and they're like, what is he talking about? And they found out that when they found this woman, she was like, my husband died three years ago, like, you know, right before this boy was born. And she's like, and these are his children, yeah, are like, so that kind of stuff, when I hear a story like that, and I don't believe like people are making up these kinds of stories and droves. - Right. - No, I believe in that stuff. I do believe in energy and like, I don't think when someone dies, they're gone. I think they just become something else. - Something else. - But like being reincarnated, like I just really don't want that to happen. I've had a good life, like I would like to wrap things up. - I was having this conversation with Bob, Bob the drag queen, and they said the-- - Oh, Bob the drag queen. - So the same thing sitting in the seat was like, could you imagine doing some other version of this for eternity? I don't want that. - No. - I don't want that. - Bob the drag queen wants, I was in New York and he's like, I have these mushrooms for you. You're gonna love them. He had them delivered in my hotel and I left my hotel and forgot about the mushrooms. And so I had my other friend go and I'm like, oh my God, I forgot the mushrooms are at the front desk. They didn't bring them up to my room. - Right. - And my other friend went and she took them, she went and got the mushrooms and then took the mushrooms. And she's like, they're amazing. I go, that wasn't the-- - That wasn't what I said to do. I said to grab them for me for the next time I'm in New York. You dumb ass. - I just said, well, I did grab them and then I did them. - Oh no, that wasn't even about the drag queen. It was Monet exchange. I always get the two of them confused because of their show. Sorry. - Now, are you into the microdose scenario? - Yeah, yeah, I love drugs. I'm a big proponent of drugs. Everyone would be nicer if everyone took a little microdose of something every single day. - Now, you said that you feel like you are a pharmacological into it. - Into it. - Farm to table gynecologist or a pharmaceutical into it. - Right? Okay, so like you said-- - You would be great on all drugs. I can tell you that right now based on your personality. - Sure. - Oh, are a little bit more shy and would have a little problem with something. Maybe some like street drugs, but psychedelics are not street drugs. - Wait, street drugs? - Like coke and, you know, heroin or like, scroll stuff, like that stuff. I don't know not into that. - Right, right, right, you know. - I like psychedelics because they take the edge off of personalities and personality disorders. - Yeah. - And they also make people much more grateful and easier to be around. - Agreed. - I like to relax. - Yes. - Like relax. - Well, people to really be themselves. - Yeah. - Really, like I always want everyone. I'm like, oh, I just want you to be more of yourself. Even if that person isn't something you, someone you think I would like, like I look at drugs as like an illumination of your personality. If you, to something that sparks you up and makes you brighter, then you know, sometimes without the drug, how to go in that direction. - Absolutely. - Like I know that part of me exists. I want to find it again and I want to be that light. - Yep. - Like drugs illuminate personalities. - Yep. - And that's my statement. - And I love it. What I also love is your openness, allowing people to, the freedom of exploring that, right? Like I feel like so many people hide it, so many people like, there's like a judgment around trying things, trying new things. And it's like, oh, well, I don't want to take this. And I don't like that because, first of all, it's like my sister, we were on a trip to Greece this summer. And I had some LSD, microdose LSD, that I was handing out to everyone on the boat. - What is a microdose of LSD? What is this? - This is perfection. It's what it is. It's a little piece of paper you put in your mouth and you're like, oh my God, what a great day. - Right. - Everything is better. The sky is bluer, the sea is more magical. - But are you a person that doesn't have, like, usually people talk about like bad trips and something like that? - No, no. This is not that. You're doing such a small amount. You would have to take like 13 of these microdoses to equal one big tab of acid from like, - Got it. - Like the 90s. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - It's not like that. You could, and then you have the ability all day to game up if you want. If you want more, you take more. My sister is a virgin. Oh, she's not a virgin. She has children, but she may as well be a virgin. And I don't say that to be disrespectful, but I do. She pretended to take the LSD and put it in her pocket. (laughing) And her own daughter told on her. She goes, "Chelsea, Shawn did not take that LSD." And I'm like, how sad is it that we're this age and my sister is like pretending to take turns? - She was for my benefit. - Who was she pretending to also like feel it? Was she like, "Oh my gosh." - No, she just didn't want to take it and she didn't want the conversation around me bullying her. (laughing) I understand. Nobody wants to be bullied about taking drugs, but it's so fun. - Right. - And then you want her to have some fun. - I'm sorry, and I know you are. It's so miniscule. - Yeah, the idea is spreading joy. You want me to put a good time. - I want people to have fun, and I want to illuminate like the possibilities. You know sometimes you are, you're not feeling it. - Okay, girls with that. - The rooster. - Okay. - You're not feeling it. You're not feeling it yourself. You're not feeling life. You're not feeling it. Sometimes you need medicine. And medicine like people take medicine in all sorts of pharmacological ways that are terrible for you. Anti-depressants, you know, not to shame them, but some of them are really bad for you and some of them are really addictive. And then you look at something that is like natural and holistic, and then you poo poo on that. Why? - Why? - Who cooked this chicken? It's like, I can't, I need a steak knife or a saw. Do you have a saw? - Okay, so it just was in the warmer a little too long, that's it? - Well, I mean, you said you cooked all the food, so. - I mean, the warmer a little too long. - Okay, you don't have to get so defensive. (laughing) I mean, it's a good meal though. - It is kind of done on me while we're in this conversation that I should probably share this with you. One, I really do appreciate you being here because the books that I read from you recently do feel like a different direction. I mean, you've always written incredible books. I mean, there's no wonder why you're, was it seven times New York Times best selling? - Yeah. - Like, it's unreal. I'll have what she's having and life will be the death of me in particular felt like a different lane, a different activation of your brain and your story that you had a different intention of sharing about hope also hoping that people who are reading were gonna be better for reading it. - Yeah. - Not just it was fun to tell and like, who would connect with it. It's one of the reasons why, I mean, you're literally, you are the first white woman to be on this show. And. - Wow. - What a huge onus on my shoulders. - Yeah, I mean, true, it's true. - I have to represent. - You do. - And so far so. - Thank God, I'm surrounded by black people so that I can represent. - You know what I mean? - 'Cause I feel at home here, thank you. - You're the part. - Through your writing, your work on television, the people that you hire, I think about Lonnie Love, her being on your show Chelsea lately. Your work as an activist, you know, it's just like you have a care for more people to have a better shot, for more people to have a better platform or a better experience. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You get it. I talked about this the other day about why it's so difficult to date straight white men at this point in my life, like I know, you know, it's kind of a funny, but it's, I'm not joking. You're right. It's funny, but it's true. Exactly. And I said, it was a clip from a podcast that I saw and I, when I saw it, it was very funny because I was watching it, like as a viewer, not as like, I was the person, I'm like, God, she's saying exactly how I feel. I'm like, that's you, that's you. But white guys had never had to think about white straight men, have never had to think about losing their rights because their rights have never been in jeopardy. As a woman who has a platform and when I was doing Chelsea lately, like, please don't give me more credit than is deserved, I literally only cared about people who were funny. It wasn't like a strategy. It wasn't like, I'm going to make, but I'm a woman. And as a woman, you're just more open to the idea that like, funny comes from a bevy of personalities, not just people who look like you. Like if anything, me and three white girls, I'm like, I'm not that interested. Right. That's a particularity. There aren't a lot of people that think like that. But if you illuminate people to recognize like, okay, as a white woman, have you ever, like I did a documentary for Netflix called Chelsea does white privilege. And all these women were like claiming that they were so not anti-racist that they weren't racist because anti-racist, to me, as a white woman is active like, I'm actively being anti-racist, which sometimes makes you even seem racist because you're trying so hard to like, yeah. But I remember that duck. Those women in like, was it Orange County? Yes. And they were like, we, we don't, we don't see it. She was like, I mean, I just, I just don't see it. I don't see it. You said, how would you? Why would you see it? Yeah. What? Doug. Here in your underwear. Doug, are you going to take a should, oh my god. No, no, he's just exploring the industry. What if he takes a should-doobie behind us while we're filming this? I'll tell you, it would be. It would be, I'll tell you, it would be. I'll tell you, it would be the first, but at least he's black. What do you think I got in white women I've dealt with in my life? It kind of goes back to the empathy part of the conversation, but much broader. Because we're talking about, like, part of our human race, and when people are not exposed to different things, then they don't have any room to make different decisions. Right. They are just told either by their parents or by their husbands, and this is a certain sect of women. This is not all women. You need someone until lighted up in you to go, okay, is this a situation that is acceptable? Or is this, you know, is this racism working? Or is there a reason why the only black person that's working in this office doesn't want to sit with all the white people and wants to sit in an office by yourself? What are you going to do about that? If I got hit to something, I just want to share anything I got hit to about. Like I grew up in a way where I wouldn't say I wasn't racist, because I would never make that declaration, because I think it's innate, and so many of us just societally, I just grew up wanting to learn more about what I didn't know. Right. It's a gift to not have such judgment, and also misplaced judgment. Like you're limiting. I always look at life like, do I want to be narrow or do I want to be big? Like if I don't want to do something, I'm like, I don't want to do that. I'm like, okay, but are you being narrow-minded or are you being, are you just need a break from people? Like, I don't want to go to Coachella. I don't want to go to Burning Man. Burning Man. I don't want to see rich people share for the very first time. I'm not interested, but I went to Glastonbury and had the fucking time of my life. Glastonbury looks like a good time. Because that's in a different country, and I'm like, this is less annoying. It's true. It is amazing. It's got to be better. When anyone invites me to Burning Man, which is almost every year. Every year. I'm like, please don't talk to me about that again. In one of your books, you said 2018 was the year that things had to fall apart. You had to fall apart to put it back together. What did you mean by that? Well, this is the height of your show on Netflix, right? Well, that wasn't really a height, because it wasn't a very successful show. I mean, it was the very first show on a streaming platform, and I did it for two years. What I did a series of documentaries called Chelsea Does, those were very successful. Well, Trump was elected. I handled that, you know, I didn't like that, I didn't like the outcome, I didn't understand how much I didn't know about this country and about the history of this country. And that basically, something as beautiful as Barack Obama being elected would have the consequence of the exact opposite, antifetical. It's like the pendulum they talk about. Did you never imagine it would swing that opaquely, like that in your face? Yeah, yeah. That was like a retribution almost to our country, like almost like. But now when I look at Trump now, I'm like, now the swing is good, the pendulum, I'm informed now. The pendulum is going to swing, and it's going to be AOC, and it's going to be Zoran Manani, Mamdani, and it's going to be, and it's going to be all of that, and we need that, because the system is broken. Right. And when the system breaks, you have to rebuild. So in 2016, I had turned 40, and I think I just kind of had a nervous, not a nervous breakdown. I didn't have a breakdown. I just kind of was started to think about what am I doing, and why am I doing it? 40 does that to you, though, also, right? It's like it's the whole, the whole game of like, oh, I'm figuring it out. Yes. It feels like it's okay, we're wrapping that shit up. Yeah. What have you figured out? How valuable to society, like am I valuable in my craft, or my art, I don't ever say the word craft, I can't believe I just said it, so please act on that. But how valuable in what I'm doing, and my valuable, I was like, a woman, and now, like, I know that I am. Yeah. I know that what I say is like, important to the people that are listening to me. Yeah. I know I'm not for everyone. I don't care or struggle with that. Did you ever? Yeah, yeah, yeah, when I was younger, I mean, you know, there's always times where you feel insecure, and then there are times where you feel great, and you realize there's a bigger plan, like, and that goes back to what we were talking about earlier, like, no, I don't believe in God, but I do believe, like, in aligning with the universe, like, don't fight the reality of the situation, work with it, work with it, and like glide instead of, you know, kind of hike. Yeah. I run everything to be a little bit more peaceful and also optimistic, and I know that I have a powerful kind of energy and voice, so I try to use that, like, very, I try to be very discerning with it, rather than before when I was younger, I would just like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and throw it all around. Like now, I'm more, I'm a conservationist, a little bit more. You know the value one of that output, and that's a lot of energy out. And also not to be so angry as a woman, because it doesn't go over well. Like, you know, I mean, that's one of the things that I love about my stand-up or being on tours that I get to go out and really just be with people and say exactly how I feel. Yeah. I think the first time in 2016, when I was going off about the election and Donald Trump being elected, I was so angry that there was so much venom that you kind of cut off part of the people that are listening to you. So like this time, when Donald Trump was elected, I had the opportunity to like, recalibrate my anger and make my voice be sporadic, but meaningful, and joyful, yeah. Even when I'm talking about bad things to provide joy. There's an activation also around, it's not just how I feel about something. Here's also some steps you can take if you feel the same way. You can bring people in rather than to make them go, Chelsea's so angry right now, Chelsea's so angry. And I understand that I did that, and I was learning. And I've learned now how to be discerning in the times that I weigh in. And I, it will always be an evolution, but I'm not afraid to learn more about myself at all. It's like ready to go. And keeping with that understanding, knowing when it's time to go, you were writing around your breakup with Joe. With Joe Koei. Yeah. And you can say one, you can't say Joe, it's Joe Koei. Joe Koei. It's Joe Koei. Joe Koei. You're breakup with Joe Koei. Thank you. I want you to treat this very seriously. I know. And I am. Truly, with all due respect. To Joe Koei. To Joe Koei. To Joe Koei. You were talking about understanding the difference of missing someone and believing to be belonging with them. Yeah. Right? I'm not going to confuse missing someone with belonging with them. Yes. But what were you discovering that like, like, okay, this feeling I need to feel, but I don't need to confuse it with something else. Like, I don't need to call you and be like, do you miss me? Should we see each other? Yeah, I know. Like, missing someone is like an emotional, it's an uncooperative emotional reaction. You can't get your emotions to cooperate with you when you want them to cooperate. Missing someone is a completely natural reaction to, to losing a friend or a lover. To the absence of someone, yeah. But in your practical brain, which is this brain, I always like, you know, remind myself from my own psychiatrist, like, this is the frontal, prefrontal cortex and this is your back brain. Like, your back brain is your sensible brain and it's like, you have to understand just like someone dies, like, there's going to be a period of grieving and then there's going to be a period of you accepting what happened and moving on. I don't know what age I was when I broke up with Joe Koy, it was like 47 or something. It was very difficult. I really loved him. Yeah. I had a really difficult time accepting that it wasn't going to work out, but I made the decision on my behalf, on behalf of all women. Like any time I make a decision like that, it's not for me, it's for all women. Like I think, what if this woman was dealing with this situation? What would I tell her that my decision is made? Really? If it has nothing to do with me, what would you do? Right. Which was really beautiful because I think another thing that you wrote was you had to see yourself as a little girl, as the little girl you, and you took care of her the way that she needed to be taken care of, not how Chelsea was thinking. The little girl version of me sitting here with you having a conversation about this is so fun. Like when I, when you just said that, I just thought, oh my God, I just imagined myself at seven years old knowing like, your life's going to be fun, it's going to be great, you're going to be super successful, you're going to have a dog, I guess. Don't bark at men, so that guy's white. This is what he does. See? Yeah, you have to love all colors. I told you that, I had to get a black dog because Kevin Hart called my dog racist before. So then when I did this shoot, I was like, okay, well, guess what, now what are you going to say? Now what? And by the way, yeah. It's not my dog. It's you. So, like, I just thought of my little girl self imagining being here, sitting here as a 50 year old woman with a life that I've led, talking about this and like all of the accomplishments like how great is that? Yeah. You know, to be sitting here and actually taking that little person with you always. Yeah. Because we all have that person and we sometimes neglect to reflect about how far we have. That was almost like a Jesse Jackson moment. I don't know where that came from. To reflect. You were putting on a T-Shirt because seriously, if you looked in in the last year, what are the things you've accomplished in the last year? I'm not going to do this with you. But I'm going to cry. Exactly. Like launching this show was such a big deal for us and such a big deal to strike out on your own. I'm going to work for NBC and for Access Hollywood and had pitched a version of this show everywhere. And it was like, oh, God, we love you. Yeah. But maybe, you know, something else. And so then we put it out and in the first episode went viral. I love that. Yeah. And it's been up ever since. I was driving home. No, you're everything. I'm full of shit. But I'm not. I can't even look at you right now. But I was driving home the other day, listening, re-listening to, I'll have what she's having. And you were talking about the woman that you wanted to be and how you were drawing the through line of who you dreamed she would be and the way, the evidence that you have become her. I got emotional because I was through in the same experience with myself. Yeah. And why I wanted to be as a kid, the life that I'm living now, is that life. Yeah. And I was immediately confronted with it in your book. And it made me take that time to reflect. To want the best for yourself and accept that you want the best for yourself is not selfish. That's like the truest expression of love is wanting to love yourself. Because the best way you love out, like when you take care of this, then I have so much more to give. If I'm good, we're all good. And not in a selfish, domineering way, that as long as I'm healthy, I can expand. When you do admit what you want in the world and you say it out loud and you say it in prayer or whatever your thing is, all these signs come around and you're like, "Oh, I just said that. I did this car. I just, I wanted to meet someone like this." And then I have this beautiful friend, like all of the stuff starts to align in a very universal way that isn't, I don't want to obfuscate that with God, but it might be, but I don't know. But all I know is your energy and your magnetic field change when you decide that your self-respect and self-love are paramount to anything else. Yes. And then you can go give out the best love. And you pair that with the idea of not what you want, not just, or should say, not just what you want, not just what you want to take, but also what you have to offer when you pair that specificity or that clarity with, "Here's what I want to give. Here's what's in need to develop, to bring to this world, to make it a better place for at least a couple people here, the way that things shift in your life." And so when I read that in your book, I was like, "This is what I have always, this is something I have always believed that if we could get our minds around instead of only focusing on what we want out of life." Right, right, right. Not now. What is my gift to this person? It's what am I giving? Because then you get into receiving mode so much more easily. And it's like, it's not about taking, it's about sharing. Like, I don't want to take anything from anyone. Let's all share. And for people who are watching, like who aren't public or celebrity, this is about you too. And for all of us, it's not about how many people you impact, because most. You're a follower count. No, no, no. It's definitely not about that. It's about the domino effect of what you do when you see a stranger in an airport that's frustrated and needs help that doesn't speak the language and you go and try to help them. Or it's what you do when you see somebody crying in their car and you're like, "Can I help you?" And ignoring them, it's like it's a domino effect of like, everything in this world is connected by water, right? Yep. Everything is really. Right. Yeah. So we got that message. The other message is pretty obvious. Exactly. We are all connected. Never. What you do for someone else gets done to another person, gets done to another person. So like, whatever you got, that's the goodest, bring it. Be that. Bring it. The difference is where you feel chet or like that you, that you, there are reminders that like feel like they are sent from him. You lost your brother at a very young age. I lost my brother at an age where Doug, what are you doing? Why are you breathing like a rapist? Doug? Doug? Calm down. Come over here. Do you want a cocktail? Doug, do you need a sip of alcohol? Really like a rapist? When my brother died, I did not have the tools and understanding of how to communicate with anyone that passed away. I was in grief and I was only nine years old so I was like a baby and I didn't understand. So when I think about that little girl version of myself that we were just talking about, that's my girl. Like, she's nine. She's that age. That's my baby. Like, I'm like, honey, I got you. Like, we're in charge now, okay? Yeah, yeah. But when my mother died, I had enough experience with the first death to understand that like I, I, it was two different deaths. One was someone snatched out of your life in a terrible accident. The other one was watching someone die for many months, weeks, hospice, IK. What's worse? So the one death is great for the guy that dies because he doesn't have to deal with dying. Right. But it's almost insurmountable as a family to come over to get past it without some real problems developing. And then the other option is to have somebody die slowly as a mother or as a person. You don't want to be remembered like for those last two weeks in hospice, right? But because of those two different, very different experiences, I understood like at an age, my mom died when I was in my 30s and I was like, I was just about to begin my career. Chelsea lately had an even started and I had so many distractions that I was able to delay my grief. I'll deal with that at another time. I have an exciting life to live. But once I went to therapy and I got focused on the fact that I had grief, that I had an examine not only from my brother, but from my mother, then I got serious about connecting with them again. Then I was like, okay, you can ask your mom and your brother for a sign and my sign is oranges, always oranges out of place. The camping at a grocery store, the camping at a fridge, they have to be like crazy out of place. This is why. The oranges are on the book of life will be the death of me. That's why. I'm dating 50 cent. Okay. I'm performing. He convinced me to date him after he was on my show. It was like a Friday that he was a guest, I think. And then I came in over the weekend and there were like dozens and dozens of roses in my office. And my assistant was like, Curtis cent has called three times. Curtis cent. Curtis cent. Curtis cent. She's like, fitting. I'm like, oh really? That's fitting. She went, girls. I'm like, what? From Curtis to fitting. To fitting. So I was like, oh, and she goes, he wants to call you. I don't want to talk to him. I go, he's like, you know, all those guys used to hit on me. But it was like, just kind of like play. But Curtis was sweet. He was. He felt different. He was sweet because he seemed gangster, but he wasn't a gangster. Like the fact that he was shot so many times, you're like, how did you get shot? Like, that doesn't even make any sense. So then I was like, listen, I'm not going out with you. I go, I have a show in New Orleans this weekend, you're welcome to come. You can meet me in New Orleans. This is my hotel. You're welcome to get a room and you can come to my show. And you know, we'll go out and have a drink. Right. He comes to the hotel and he's checks in. And my assistant's like, okay, well, now you're really going to deal with him. Right. And I was like, so I was like, shit, we're going to get myself into it. So I go, do you want to go for a walk? And he goes, I can't really go for a walk outside. And I was like, who do you think you are? Really? He's like, I can't go for a walk outside. And I was like, I think you can. Like, get over yourself so we go for a walk. What? And it was crazy. Like, every person we saw was like, finish it. - Yeah, so you know, shit, I didn't, like, I didn't know. You know, we're in New Orleans, I didn't tell you. - Like, you know, a lot of people, and everyone knew him, and he's like a major deal. So then we got, we went to, like, we came to my show. He was very sweet, he's such a sweet guy. And he doesn't do drugs, which was the biggest disappointment of all. I was like, you don't drink or do drugs? - Right. - And we only dated for a very short time. But, you know, people blew up because people were like, what are these two doing together? But he really was one of the sweetest people. - So how did the orange, what did the, what did the, - I had read this book about signs from the universe by Laura Lynn Jackson, and it says you have to ask for the sign. And I remember getting on my knees and praying 'cause I don't do that a lot. I remember being like, mom, if you're there, like, please, please, just show me something. Like, I need to know that you're okay, or that you're with me, and that you're, you know, that I'm not gonna fuck up with you around. And my sign is oranges, and I get down into the car out of New Orleans, and I was with like three people. We get in the car, the car is being driven. It's an SUV, and we look over, and the car next to us has a huge oversized, like, not plastic orange, but like, what's that hard material? - That's a acrylic orange. - A acrylic orange, but strapped on the roof of a four-door car, strapped in, like, it's giant. - Like, for no reason. - For no reason. - If that's the one said, hey, would you like an orange juice? Like, the most absurd orange you could think of. - And I looked over and saw it, and I didn't even, I couldn't even tell anyone about it, 'cause I was like, no one's gonna believe this. - Oh my God. First of all, my mom is with me. - Right. - So I don't even need to be talking to anybody else. - About this. - Yeah. - And then it happened in this beautiful exchange with Curtis in New Orleans. - Yeah, I think 50 Cent and I were out, and there was so much, like, backlash. If somebody took a photograph of us, and I was like, I don't, like, allow myself to get upset about things like that, but I think at that point in my career, people were just like, I mean, it was just kind of racist, like this backlash. - Yeah. - And I was like, - That's where we are. - I couldn't believe it, and I just said to my, like, that's why I think I got done. I'm like, this can't be right. Like, I'm not making decisions based on other people's reactions, right? Show me the way, like, and she was like, no. - You got this. - You're never doing that. - Exactly, right. - My grandmother, my mom's mom, was dying of breast cancer when I was being born, right? Like, as I was being born, she was dying of breast cancer. She didn't live many months after I was born, and I feel the prayer, she was an ordained minister in the state of Indiana. I feel like the energy of her prayers on my life all the time. - Oh, wow. - You know, like, you're protected from things that, like, you put yourself in a situation and you still came out unscathed. - But you're a team of light, you know, like some people would call it, which is, not necessarily are the people that have crossed over, but that's also a very powerful thing when someone dies, and there's a person that's born, that window, happens a lot in life where a grandfather dies, or a grandmother dies, and then a baby is born, and you just lost your dad, but you have a new baby, so there's like this. - Weird kind of life. - Reef, but, like, love, and you're like, oh, maybe they're the same person, or there's some sort of magic. - Connection. - Yeah, like, I always think, like, okay, someone's still being able to message you. If you choose to believe in that. - If you choose to believe it. - Then, why aren't they onto their next life if you believe in reincarnation and all of these things go together usually, and you're like, oh, but you're thinking in a linear way that only one person could be in one place at one time. - That's it! - Like, I bet I'm in a bunch of other places. - A bunch of other places. - And so are all of us. - Yeah, I love you so much. Thank you so much for this. You ready to play a game? - What is it? Seven minutes in heaven? - Let's go see. - Oh, oh, it sounds sexual. - Yeah. - Doug, come with us. - Come, Doug. - Ryan Reynolds here from InMobile. The message for everyone paying big wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything goodness, world, stop. With Mint, you can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpay no judgments, but that's weird. Okay, one judgment. Anyway, give it a try at mintmobile.com/switch. - Upfront payment of $45 per three month plan equivalent to $15 per month required. Intro rate for three months only. Then full price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra. See full terms at MintMobile.com. (upbeat music) - Rip, rip, rip, rip. - We're having a cocktail now. I'm gonna play a game. - Okay. - The day you got. - What I discovered, you know, getting to know you is that you love skiing just as much as I do. - I don't believe you can ski the way I can ski. - I've seen you ski and I'm pretty sure I'm not far behind. - And nobody who says that is as good as they say. - I love an app, Ray. - You know who else thinks they're a good skier? Rob, Rob Lowe. He says that all the time too. And he, I don't believe him for a second. - What? - Because if you're a good skier, you don't have to say you're a good skier. It's just like anything else in the world. Even if you're good at something and people will find out about it. - Yeah. - Or shut up. - Well, you're about to find out. - Okay, I'm gonna beat the shit out of you. (laughing) So these are blue hills and those are green runs and blues are more difficult than greens. - Which is why you have them. - Okay. - What's the game? - So there's a little trivia. It's called Snow Your Facts. - Okay. Do I need to hold my buzzer like you? - I don't know, maybe not. - You seem insecure. - Okay, first of all, you're not wrong. I'm a little nervous. First question. - On a chow chow, what starts out pink and eventually turns black? - Oh, sorry, you should've-- - Okay. - Tom. - You're right. So you go down the mountain. - I'm going down the mountain. - Uh oh. - Okay, I'm gonna get my hand closer to the-- - Yeah. - Oh, yeah, see? - You're right about that. - See? - You played this game. Actually, I would say that's a debarant. - What? - You tried to cheat, 'cause you knew that you had to get there quicker. - No, man. - And then you put it out, yeah, and then-- - No, and then you sit on it. - You sit on it. - Put it down. - Okay, I'll take the loss, I'll take the loss. - Yeah, see? - Finish the lyrics, because I have one hand in my pocket and the other one is-- - Giving you the piece of me. (upbeat music) - I was trying to go through this, Atlanta's more set. - Thank you for that. I just came from her concert. - You did? - Yeah, Sunday night. - How was it? - Fresh. - Fresh? Do you need me to spell that for you? - You went to-- - Fucking awesome. That is the oldest song, and it's fresh still. That's how fucking cool she is. - I hear that. - She is awesome. - Now let us more set, I feel like it's one of those people with you. - She's on another-- - Yeah, yeah. - She's not even with us. She goes to another place. I saw her at Glastonbury, and then I took my girls to see her in Vegas, 'cause I was like, you guys have to see this. - Moving down the mountain, here we go. - Who was People's 2025 Sexiest Man Alive? - 2025? - 2025. Somebody who didn't deserve it. Ryan Reynolds. - No, it was the Jack-Jack. It's the, from the office, from the office, and the Amazon show. - No, no, no, no, no, no, Jack. - Jack. - Jack Rikers. - Emily Blunt's husband. - Yeah. - Chrisinsky, John. - John, Chrisinsky. - John, Chrisinsky. - John. - I didn't even think that was true. - Hold on a second. Hold on, hold on. Hold on. Hold on. - Give us a hint. - First name is Jonathan. Bailey? - VB. - That's a good one. Jonathan Bailey. You know, you got that. - But wait, I feel like my answer to Alonus was wrong. One hand in my pocket, and one hand holding a cigarette. - No, you're good. There was five options. - Oh, great. - You're right. - Yeah, exactly. - See you on the opposite. - I did. You were with that. - I'm the opposite of a cheater. - All right, you're like, wait. - I got a camera. I don't want any problems in the future. - The next question is in Spanish? - Yeah, since you're both learning Spanish. - Okay. - Estoy a prender, no? - Quien va a cantar en el próximo show de medio tiempo del Super Bowl? - Ah, see. - At least for 40 and a half times, Super Bowl. - Bad Boone. Yeah. Bad Boone. - That was good. - Right? - I didn't want any of you who doesn't really know Spanish. - In Tenses? - Yeah, no, not in Tenses. - In Toses? - A recent daylight heist took place at which iconic. - No, you don't get to say it as just. - We did it at the same time. - You're right, though. It is the loop. It's the loop. Okay, here we go. - If you're on the slopes and you just took a face shot. - Oh, I know this one. - What went down? - Somebody's stopped in front of you. Skate in front of you. - Powder on your face. - Oh! - Okay, that's a face shot. - Of course. - Okay. - Mm-hmm. - Whoa. - Oh! - The way you're a hill is a little bit easier than mine. - I might even get a little crazy. - No, I don't think so. - Okay, which music festival takes place on a working dairy farm in Somerset, England? - Glass and Bay. - Wait, that's on a dairy farm? - Yeah. - Is that right? - Yeah. - What's your favorite show there? - A lot of Sparset. - Wait, what made you decide to go to Glass and Bay? I can't really see you being like music festival person. - I knew I'd be in the VIP situation of it and all my VIP friends were like, come to Glass and Bay. And I was like, if I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do it with this crew of people. And that was one of the best decisions I've ever made. - What TV drama takes place inside the fictional network, UBA? - Morning, show. - Morning, show. - Beat you to it. - I don't know. - I beat you to it. - You did. - I did, I got it. My infraction of a second. - Yeah, you did. - Just like the Olympics. - Okay, hold on, let's see. - Okay. - You're doing some flips. - Tennis legend Raphael Nadal was born on which island? - America. - Okay, here's what you need to know. - What are you, what were you gonna say? You didn't even know that. - I hit that. - Great questions. I love how they're geared towards me. I love it. That's just respecting women and respecting each other. - Okay, first of all, you're right. Second of all, I hit that buzzer. I had no idea. - It was right. - Because you said Nadal, do you also play tennis? I know you love tennis. - I mean, I don't play tennis, like, you know, I don't play regularly, but I used to play a lot. - Okay. - You know, I had to choose skiing or tennis, I chose skiing and you see the dividends that I am yielding. - I think that you actually might have already won the game. - I feel like I did. Should we have one bonus question? - Just one more bonus. - Just one kiss. - Just a kiss. - Just a kiss. Just a smack my win. Oh! - What did Anna Win-Tor make headlines for this year? - We're tired. - Did she retire? Or did she step down from Vogue Editor-in-Chief? - She got fired. (laughing) - I swear she was ready to take those sunglasses off. - Well, are those sunglasses coming? - I'll get one. - I'll get one. - I respect it, 'cause it could cover up almost anything. - Anything. - If your eyes are covered, you could get away with going showing up anywhere, anytime, any place, in any kitchen. - But also, it's not just her eyes. She's got the bangs and then the glasses. - There's only one- - Face her attached to the glasses. (laughing) - One third of her face is showing. That's it. - When I'm going to record my podcast, if I'm tired or hungover or my eyes are perfect, I just wear glasses, regular glasses. Imagine the luxury of wearing sunglasses. Chip public events all the time. You don't even have to get ready. - I'd be like, "Oh, can't talk to you." Most of us are. (laughing) - You won this game. - Fair and fair. - You did absolutely. - You tried to cheat. - No, I just tried to get the odds in my favor. I loved you before, and I love you now. - Thanks for having me, it was so much fun. I had a great time. - You were the bomb. - Thank you. - Truly, truly, truly. And excited about this tour, I want to remind people of thinking good tickets, where they want to get tickets. - Yeah, come see me, ChelseaHandler.com, baby. - You coming? - Thanks, guys. - Bye, baby. - This is so much fun. - I told you that you wouldn't have liked the strawberry and the croix. - Mm-hmm. - I tried to tell you. ♪ Maybe we'll laugh, maybe we'll cry ♪ ♪ But best believe we'll have a time ♪ ♪ Hey, neighbor, come inside ♪ ♪ Musical guests and a little perspective ♪ ♪ Seen the stars and a new life ♪ ♪ Hey, neighbor, hey neighbor ♪