Building Confidence

Shut up, and sit down. Welcome to Being On Stage, the only podcast that gives you motivation, inspiration, and confidence to be better on stage. No matter how you entertain, sing, dance, band, comedian, public speaking, MC, drag, burlesque, performance art, or street performer, this is the show for you. Hey, rock stars. Reggie Dawson, your host of the show. Welcome back to the Being On Stage podcast. I have met several performers. I'm not going to say a lot, but it has been several. I've met several performers that just, their confidence level, nowhere near where it should be. And it affects your show. It really does. And more so, I've met people that truly want to perform, and honestly, if you watch their mannerisms and how they interact with people, they very much have the showmanship to get on stage. And they just don't have that confidence in themselves that they can do it in front of people. And I'm not, this is not about stage fright. Like, there's a little bit of a difference between just not having the confidence and stage fright. Stage fright is more of like a, afraid of being in front of people, and afraid of what they're going to think, and how it's going to be, and afraid you're going to mess up, and fear of mistakes. Like, confidence is more like, you know there's not going to be any mistakes, you just don't think it's good enough to be put in front of people. And you just, you just don't think you're good enough. Like, you're comparing yourself to other people, you know, and that's, that's a mistake. Truthfully, yeah, look, early in the podcast, I'm already giving away the end. It is 100% a mistake to compare yourself to other people, to think you're not good enough, and to lack that confidence. Well, yeah, it's very easy to say that. You know, you shouldn't lack confidence, and you should be confident. But then there's the, you know, obvious question of, well, okay, Reggie, if I lack the confidence to get on stage, how do I get the confidence to get on stage? I am so glad that you asked that question. I really am. There's, there's a couple of easy, simple ways to build your confidence, truthfully. Some of them are, a couple of them are, you know, can be painful. And I, I can't say. There's only three. There's a few. I'm not going to number things, because usually I'm on this podcast, and I'm like number one, and there's never a number two, or three, or four. Or I'll get to number two, and then I'll just stop. Or I'll say I have three things, and in all reality, I have six things. So, no more numbers. That's my, that's my new podcast goal, is to stop numbering things in my podcast. Like, number one, this. Number two, that. No steps. Just straight up information. Boom. So, one of the ways that, back to the topic at hand. One of the ways that you can, you know, boost your confidence, it, it's a little painful, and please don't stop the podcast. There are easier methods after this, but I'm going to give you the hardest one, and that is to just suck it up and do it. That's, that's one of the, actually, most popular ways to boost your confidence. Sometimes there may be a little bit of alcohol. Now, I'm not talking getting hammered, but if you need a drink or two to kind of, like, loosen up. And still, you know, have your wits about you and be able to function, you know, that's different, depending on what your tolerance level is. I'm not, I'm not, you know, against alcohol consumption before a show. I do believe that in certain aspects, you can lean on it. I, I don't believe in getting hammered before a show or inebriated or really any kind of loss of function, which I know there's the argument you always, you know what, whatever. This podcast is not about drinking. I don't mind. I'm not one of those people that's going to tell you no drinking before a show. Got it. So, you know, if you need a drink or whatever to kind of just calm the nerves, loosen it up, that's fine. But the best way and probably the quickest way to boost your confidence is just suck it up, buttercup, and just get out there and do your thing in front of people. And not worry about the confidence and just start doing it and you will just see that they like you. And that's, that's really the easiest, quickest way to boost your confidence is just to do it. And then you're going to see that people actually respond to you and enjoy what you have to do. Second way. Oh, I just did it again. I numbered something. Next way. The next way you can boost your confidence is by practicing. And I know it's like, really practicing? Yeah, practicing. Because the better you feel about what you're doing, the more likely. You are to be confident when you do it on stage, because if you're enjoying what you're doing, you record it, you know, you watch yourself in a mirror, you watch yourself on video, record your rehearsals, learn new things on YouTube, YouTube University, by the way, it's completely free. What YouTube I learned so much on YouTube, I learned how to rhinestone jackets, I learned how to Yeah, right, you heard me right, rhinestoning Yeah, I'm not ashamed. I was a showman. I learned how to build certain things like build props and stuff on YouTube, I learned how I actually I learned how to upload a podcast on YouTube, I learned how to design a website on YouTube, all this stuff, you can learn anything on YouTube, you can learn how to juggle on YouTube. The point is, go to YouTube University, you can learn stuff, you can, you know, keep practicing and keep working at it. And that is going to build your confidence. And when you do. Get to the point where you're confident what you're doing, and you feel really good about it, then refer to step one and just get out there and do it. So, there is a way of building confidence and it's not really a way it's more of a process that you have to follow and it's honestly it's probably step one and I know and I know I said I'm not going to do steps but this is honestly this is the primary thing that you have to do to build confidence and that is you got to accept yourself. And I've said stuff like this before and I think I've done a whole podcast on accepting yourself, but it's, it's true you in or if you're going to be confident in any way, if you're going to gain confidence, whether it's through practice, whether it's through sucking it up or whether it's through whatever the next way. No, whether it's through practice or sucking it up, you know, you have to accept who you are, what you're capable of. And honestly, you also have to accept what you look like. Because when you're going on stage, obviously you're going to be in front of people. I want to tell you, listen, I get it. I was never into what I look like. I was always big, kind of decent hair, didn't really have anything special about me. I was, I mean, I was big. I was the fat kid in school. I was always torn down in school told I can't do this. I can't do that. I couldn't ride roller coasters in the front row. Like I was that big in like middle school, high school. I couldn't sit in the front row of roller coasters. I was too big. And, you know, people didn't want to hang out with me. I was also awkward, man. I, you know, I had this thing about me where I just would keep talking awkwardly, not knowing when people are done talking to me. And I still have that issue. Like I really have an issue ending a conversation, hence the podcast where I can just end it when I feel like it's done. But it is difficult. It's a difficult thing. And don't let this shy you away, by the way, from jumping on my calendar at all. You can hop on my calendar, beingonstage.com slash calendar. We can chat for 30 minutes, help you crush your dreams and build the confidence that you need. But don't let this fact that I have an issue of talking a lot stop you. I'm actually really good at listening as well. So I've always been, you know, I was a big kid. I was very awkward around people and socially awkward a little bit. I didn't really have many friends. I had people that kind of felt sorry for me and I had people that knew who I was, but I didn't really have any friends. And so when it came time for me to perform, I had to accept about myself that, you know, I am a little awkward and I am a little over the top. And actually, I was talking to my daughter today over the top. Ostentatious is our new word. We're both the same. Like we're both completely over the top and everything. But I am over the top. I am socially awkward. And I am bad. I am big. And that's something that I really had to just dig deep and accept that in order to get on stage. And I even I was on a puppet team for the longest time. I was on a puppet team in church and I know puppet team. What is that? Yeah. Behind the stage, hand up a puppet, you know, move in the mouth and everything like that. We had signs and props and, you know, we would dance in the public to play instruments like it wasn't just it wasn't just like a ventriloquism type thing. It was like a whole like I felt like it was a serious deal. We do blacklight stuff and we'd we'd have signs that, you know, open doors and Bibles would open and a sign would split and turn around and become another sign. Like it was it was intense. Like we did a lot of cool stuff. Not going to lie. So don't knock the puppet team. I learned a lot from them. But I was behind the stage because I didn't want to be in front of the audience. And then when I was in front of the audience, it had to be a blacklight number. So they couldn't see my face. But I was still big, you know, and that's that's that's something that it was really, it's really hard to accept. It's really hard to step out on that stage knowing that I'm, you know, 250 pounds, 5'8", 5'7", 5'8", 250 pounds stepping on stage next to these 120 pound people that, you know, can move and can dance and can fold in half and flip. And I can't do any of that, you know? So you, you got to accept who you are. You got to accept what you look like and you have to accept what you're capable of. And you have to use all of that to the best of your ability. And that is what's going to start building your confidence. So the, the journey to self-acceptance is a long, hard journey, but you can do this. There are people, there are people out there that are just 100% waiting for someone like you to be on stage in front of them so that they have someone that they can connect with and they have someone that they can look up to and admire. That's, that's, that's what's waiting for you. That's why you need to build your confidence. That's why you need to take those steps and, and do, and go through that self-acceptance so that later on you can help other people accept themselves. That's what I believe. I believe that all performers are meant to have a connection and have an impact on people in certain ways. You're, you, you're the people, you're the person that's going to make people feel things. That they may have come to a restaurant or a show or a club or a bar or a festival, that you're going to make them feel things that they didn't come expecting to feel. And you're going to connect to people that, that never knew that they would have been connected to you. That's, that's why every performer needs confidence. You need to build that confidence. Even if you've been on stage for 10 years already, any, any sort of lack of confidence is holding you back. And if you, even if you've been on stage for a while, you can still suffer through self-acceptance. You can still lack confidence because there's not enough practice. You can still, you know, lack the confidence to take the next step or do the new thing. And I'm here to tell you, stop it. Stop lacking the confidence and start working on building it. If you lack money and you need to pay bills, you work to make money. If you lack confidence and you need to get on stage, you work to build confidence. And if you need a little boost along the way, that's why I'm here. Again, hop on my calendar. Let's chat. Let's move you forward. Build your confidence. Get you motivated and kick you in the pants to your dreams. That's what I'm here for. I'm going to kick you all the way to your dreams. Reggie at beingonstage.com or you can hop on the calendar beingonstage.com slash calendar. Thank you so much and keep on shining.