Brian Redban!

Welcome to another exciting edition of "Are You garbage?" The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals, or absolute trash. Now here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan, and H. Foley. Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is "Are You Garbage?" Hey, yeah! That little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that it's a good to be classy, just a big old piece of trash. Trash, trash, trash. I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day, we're out back here at Toddy's in a new edition. She put a little clearance yard sale over there and "AreYouGarbage.com" I heard, okay. Getting rid of some of the inventory. Sure. Just a form of that. And a move product. Slash in prices? My coach, coming out from right next to me, he is the CEO of "Are You Garbage?" He is an international businessman and the king of the boards and the king of burbs. Give it up for K.J. Kevin James Ryan. What up gang, shout out to you as always, please make sure you're right. If you subscribe on iTunes, full video available on YouTube, full video available over there on Spotify. And a boys are climbing a frickin' charts. Then obviously, the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com session, "Are You Garbage? You Go Over There?" We're in the top 10 of Comedy Podcasts. 16,000 straws over there in Patreon. Love that money. Gang, we couldn't be more excited than we were on "Credits" with you guys. Here was just the day for the first time. He is a very funny, very successful, stand-up comedian, podcast producer. And let's just say this, you take a lot of heat, but you are the most successful Comedy Podcast producer ever. Well, thanks. Right? Yeah. Joe Rogan experienced Killtony, you started Desquad Network, and not to throw you in a hot seat quickly, but I have a number written down here. I would like to, you don't have to say anything, just tell me if I'm around the ballpark, what you got sitting in the bank. More or less. Can I see it? Eventually. Can I see it? Eventually. But we're about there. After this week? Yeah, eventually. You're a successful man. That's a little bit of a creep right here. You like that anime stuff? Oh, come on. That's my character. Hentay Borner, whatever it's called. You like an octopus, tentacle? I don't know what you're going to do. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Brian Redman. Yay! One time coming, my friend. Oh, my God. I've been wanting to do this for so long. We had it in the books. Once or twice in Austin, and we had, we had the schedule, a schedule come. I'm glad you're here, though. Yes. Do it at the house. Do it at the studio. Yeah. Come by putty. Yes. Show over there, Madison Square Garden. Yeah, a couple there. Doing toe at the garden. Woo! It's great. I've been to the garden once. Rangers game. Oh, wait. We went and saw the first Kiltoni over it. He did. And that was a very eye-opening experience to us. Yeah. We will never be there. But when you guys ran that, you ran the, you know, through the years kind of thing, and starting in that small room at the comedy store, 12 years ago, or 13 years ago at this point, does a fucking selling out the garden. Yeah, it's very crazy. Wow. It's very crazy. Happy for you. You know we love you. Yes. Let's get into this. That being said, I mean, you know, the facts are, I think, the facts are really important. To be wearing the stuff that you wear when you go to a Gallagher show. The McDonald's Cafe coffee. The paper stroll. Oh, that's where they screw you on. Oh, is that all they do? Yeah. And they got that, they got that heavy heavy set, uh, lady working there. No, they have that high intensity sprite over there. It eats through that thing. Like it's sulfuric. So you guys do the paper straws here in New York? No. No, I mean, it's just McDonald's. We have the, the original yellow striped ones in Texas, you know, the seal skin has also stuck in the 80s. Yeah. If that's where Styrofoam comes, let's get the skyscrapers made a Styrofoam guy there. What, uh, what, what, how, what, is that all you got? That's like sweet cafe. Oh, I mean, I, I mean, I, you know, when I'm in New York, I have to get you guys have so many great coffee shops, but I saw McDonald's like, fuck is that your coffee every day? No. No, this, I make my own coffees, but, uh, it, this is the equation. This is like a baby food coffee, though, you know, where I don't want the fancy stuff. Sometimes I just want like the chocolate milk for Brian. Yeah. What's the order? Uh, uh, default, you know, just, uh, coffee has all the sugar, it's already comes preloaded. They're defaults. God. Here, but you're by and pre rolls. They ask you what, I've gotten coffee from McDonald's. I'm like, you don't know if it's an all the syrup or nothing. They like, they can't understand it. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's crazy. Oh, okay. McDonald's just getting a beverage as we all know, trash. Yeah. That's tough. A tough look, man. Brian, give us the back story. The cafe. Yeah. First of all, it's not a cafe. There's a homeless guy jerking off in here. I really tried to kick that. Like, you're going to be hanging out there working on a screenplay. Um, Ohio. Yeah. So, uh, born in Columbus, Ohio, uh, the nice, the nice part. Yeah. The nice, the nice part. Right. You were spending any time at Cleveland? No. Cleveland used to be the best, though. We used to look out. Wow. Cleveland is where it's cool and everything. Yeah. But now, you know, Detroit kind of leaked on to Cleveland and it's a little bit, Cleveland got a little Detroity. Yeah. They succeeded. Yeah. It's, whatever Detroit has, it's contagious. Yeah. It's a very small, uh, hometown like, you know, and then, were you in the city prop or outside color? No, we were in the, uh, in the burbs, uh, Worthington Dublin, which is like, you know, like high-end, uh, classy, I guess. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Then our parent, my parents got a divorce, which was like one of the first divorces in Columbus, Ohio. I think, yeah. I feel like I've heard you say that before, which is like, my mother was stoned. Yeah. How old are you? 700 years old. Yeah. That's embarrassing. Okay. It was burned as a witch. Yeah. So like, it was literally like, uh, like no one got divorces at this time. How old are you at the time? Uh, third grade, whatever that was, yeah, it's not really fucking up. Yeah. And I'm 52. So this was like early 80s. I think. Well, I'm not a stripper. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Columbus, divorce. 80s? Yeah. That's got porn right now over it. Just to see my O.F. guys, uh, no, and, uh, like, didn't even have apartment complexes back then. Yeah. Is there a home on the range? What are you talking about? Is there a apartment complex? Yeah. They, they, they, I remember they built this, like the first apartment complex and I, I remember on the news, everyone's like, this is what in a part, everybody's in there is ain't gonna always. This is where single beds. Yeah. Bang flight attendants. Because divorces were coming out. We're like starting. So when I got divorced, uh, my, uh, teachers, like, uh, I think it's going to mess them up. So we better hold them back. Is what they told me, you know? Really? Yeah. But, uh, that's what they told me. I never make a fun of you this on Killtony, actually, I think this all just came back. I think you eat neuracers in the back of the class, but I'm going to do it at home. Huffing markers. So yeah, I, uh, all right. So you got held back in third grade grade. Third grade. So you were first? No. I have a younger sister. No shit. And so we moved to another, that, that new apartment complex with your mom or your dad? My mom. Okay. My dad found out he was no one that had all the money, uh, you know, engineering stuff. My mom wasn't a working mom. She was a stay-at-home mom, right? So we got a divorce, got a divorce stand-up apartment. She got a job working as an executive secretary for Dave Thomas of Wendy's. Get the fuck out of here. Yeah. What actual Dave Thomas? Dave Thomas. I got pictures of him dressed up as Santa Claus and I'm a kid sitting on his lap. Are you fucking kidding me? Well, man. That was a show's over. He was playing with his famous guy. He ever met Dave Thomas. I got a soy. Because that's one of the questions. One of the most famous person you met as a kid. It's got to be Dave Tom. And let's see if we're hanging out with the hamburger on the weekdays. It's not because the Murphield golf tournament was in Columbus, Ohio. And so I met Bob Hope was one of the first people I met. Sean Connery. Bob Hope. Sean Conner is a golfer. Yeah. He's got it. John Daly. I met John Daly back in the day, back a few times, but I met Bob Hope. Bob Hope stepped on my foot and go, hey, get him. Sorry. And he signed. He told me. It's something racist. Hold on a second. We are, first of all, we're moving a million miles an hour. Right. I got questions. Yeah. What happened to the house? What does Dave Thomas smell like? Onions. It's weird. Yeah. Did your dad stay at the house? Dad still has that house. What? Yeah. Dad still stays at the house. What's weird is now looking back. I never asked. Why did you get divorced? I never heard. I don't care. I don't care. But looking back, I just thought it was weird that right when my parents got divorced, my mom immediately had a job as a executive secretary for Dave Thomas. So I'm like, wait, didn't my mom cheat on my dad with Dave Thomas? Am I Dave Thomas's kid? Absolutely. Because the dad, you should have gone mine. No. Did you ever meet Wendy? I think I did back then. Because it used to be a pretty tight company. We used to go to camp, like Wendy's camp and all the kids that worked for Wendy's. We all got shipped off to like summer camp together. Where did you work at Wendy's, too? No, I never worked at Wendy's. The kids are the, of the parents. That's like Scientology. Everyone's got to work there. And my mom, she's scrubbing the floor. And my mom, you always have to do these like weird things for Dave, like-- Painful. No, like carry like briefcases in small airplanes and go to like Chicago and Atlanta and-- Probably like the chili recipes. It's something like that. And I just remember as a kid, I would sit in the back. It was like one of those like propeller-- You were on the plane? Yeah. And my mom brought me to this. I don't know where my sister was. I think how they whacked fucking ass. Yeah, this is crazy. No. And my mom would like buy me like Garfield books. Just like don't look out the window. Because it's just like a small tiny plane. Oh, sesame. Yeah, yeah. Going, dropping off briefcases and getting back on the plane and going back to-- What? Yeah, it was weird shit. Were they ever a chain or like-- No, it was. But I remember it was like this big like leather briefcase thing that she had to drop off. Just people would meet at the airport. It would get back on. So that was full of cash. I don't know. No, but probably also too, if you're Dave Tom from like a business-- If you got to get something somewhere quick, it's like same day. These are like legal documents that need to be signed or whatever. Yeah. Okay. You're giving them the red band obviously. It was. It was. It was. It's got ketchup packets. They've through his chest. But the best part. They had the test kitchen. So I was a kid. I would go to see my mom at work. Are you trying to. You're trying to. You're trying to fucking make my best friend. Joe is here. Is that what you're trying to do? Oh, I'm happy for you. Yeah. We're the same. Hey, you're talking about GI Joe transformers inside. Yeah. You had a fucking wedding test kitchen. That's all the 50. Yeah. So they would like have like like a window and they you choose things that is not released and you tested them. They also had for you know, every time they had like a party, they would have like a portable frosty machines that they would bring to parties and my mom like one of one of my birthdays had the she got to bring the frosty machine of mine. Frosty back in the day. That hit that hit the fucking market like thriller. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Shakes. Shakes couldn't compare to a frosty. What? What a spoon. Then you drink it. Luke. What? I don't know. Sting once they do it. That's awesome. Well, how long did she work there? Did she then? She worked there until after I think after Dave passed and then magically just stopped working at that place. And then yeah, I worked for Red Roof and then she was like a high end. She worked at the Red Roof and corporate no corporate office. Right. Yeah. That's it. Those people all got hot jobs. Yeah. That's a big structure. Anybody that started with those guys that was involved on the ground floor with McDonnell. Red Roof in is a hot job from a corporate standpoint. Hey, I studied hotel restaurant management at Wyden University for three hours. I was on beauty. Wow. Wow. And I ended up doing well. I'm sorry to cut you. Yeah. She ended up doing well. Then met a, you know, my stepdad and now who is an architect and known as a big architect firm. Nice. So you added the apartment. And now the apartment and you ever find out why you guys moved out? Yeah, because typically like the mom stays with the kids. I must have been first of all. Yeah. I helped. Oh, they changed the laws. And it's because I had to share a bedroom with my sister growing up. They have two years younger than me. And we had like the book the book or the bookshelves in the middle of the room to separate the rooms. I respect that. Like a dorm. Yeah. It was like a dorm. That's torture. Wow. How long were you guys in that apartment? Ooh, I'd probably say third grade to about fifth grade. And then I ended up, I ended up moving in with my dad in high school. Really? So I switched. Was that like beef with, like, how I'm going to live with dad type things? It was more just like, I can't live with three women. Right. You know? And plus my dad was cooler. Had a bigger house. Yeah. And. So yeah. Had your sister feel about that? She loved it. I bet. Would it have been in your state school? Yeah. So I'd live in a different school district when I lived at my dad's, but I would drive-- Gotcha. To my other-- So you and your sister were still in the same school. You'd see on a daily basis. Yeah. Yeah. Go over to your mom's for dinner, stuff like that. Right, right. But at your old man, you probably have a couple of beers. Yeah. I could sneak into and like lay-- Yeah. That's just-- Yeah. That's just don't-- that's don't fucking care about a high school kid. Yeah. All right. How were the grades in school? No. I plead to that. No. I slept. I watched Johnny Carson every night and David Letterman. And till like three in the morning, right? And so that's why I wear hats still to this day. Because I used to just be the guy that would like sit there like this and sleep while like in school. So my grade sucked. What do you-- Old baseball pitcher? Yeah. Except for-- Should we be more cross-sleeping in the dugout? Yeah. Except for art classes. All of the art classes A plus, like-- I took every art class, but then everything else, like C's. Yeah. This barely-- Could you take the SATs or whatever it is after? Yeah, I think so. But I don't remember. Okay. I really do the thing with the Scantron, where you just like the-- You know, like-- I haven't checked lottery. I haven't checked lottery. Two seconds. Huh. What were the vacations like growing up? Yeah. Other than-- Was that-- They've taught-- They've taught-- Doing alimony and child support and all that stuff. Yeah. Were you guys comfortable in the apartment? Yeah. The apartment was nice because of brand new. You know, one of the first apartments-- The first apartment building ever. Oh, here's here something funny. When Diet Coke came out. You remember? At the first came. Wait, Diet Coke came out. Exactly. We'll get a year on Diet Coke now. No, I thought that was like 60s. Oh, I-- Really? This is the first time it's just getting a Columbus and everything. And sure. Yeah. I'm guessing like 84, 83s. July 8, 1982. 82. So a Diet Coke came out. It's the smartest person I know. Definitely most well connected. They used to have like a red roof in. Plastic bag. And they had Diet Coke, Caffin Free Diet Coke, and Coke. They put on everybody in the apartment's door handle to advertise. Get your hook. They get your hook. It's four bastards hook. I went to-- Like when they give out free mental cigarettes. Yeah. I went to every single apartment and stole those. And my mom came home and opened up the fridge. It was just packed of Diet Coke. And she was like, Brian, where'd you get that? And she was like, cool. You know what I said? Go get the full table. I'll tell Dave about it. Would you have to pay when you go to Wendy's? No, no, no. We had stacks of like meal coupons. I actually have a few of them still. Do you fuck with the salabar back then? Back then it was the best salabar. It was the best. It was something the best spaghetti I ever had in my life. I swear to God, I'll take that to the grave. And Wendy's-- because the corporate office was there. They also had their other off brands like Sisters, Chicken, and Biscuits. Do you know what that is? Heck it. That was their version of KFC. Dave's cat house? Yeah. It was KFC. But it's Sisters. Wendy's version of KFC. Rax. Do you know what Rax is? That was Wendy's version of Arby's. Rax actually did pretty well. Yeah. There's a couple Rax still around if you wanted to go. R-A-X. R-A-X. Let's get to that. Is that still banging? No, that went out of business. Rax. Who was Wendy's white meat? $1.79. Who can't stay in business with those prices? They used to have to sell that so hard and let you know, wait me. Wait me and wait me. I like a thigh. A thigh, man. Krispy thigh. Yeah. So we got all these different versions of restaurants. We got to-- That's it. Who owns Wendy's now? It's still the same company. Yeah. I don't think it's still in the same family. Did you go to Dave Thomas' funeral? No, I didn't. Did your mom? Probably. Yeah. Red dress crying in the back. Spider hair red for it. Showing her double double. No, but yeah. No college. No, I went to college. Really? I went to community college, Columbus State. Then I started going to Ohio State. But I went to-- Get the fuck out of here. Satellite campus. You go to the main campus? Yeah, main campus. You did? But like literally-- I should order back. Literally whatever semester, whatever, because-- Why semester? Because I was doing what they called multimedia production and design, which was the internet just came out. We don't know what to call this, but we need people to know how to make websites and stuff. Okay. So I was like the first time they ever offered this class to learn how to make websites. Really? And by the time I got to Ohio State, I was already getting offered all these jobs from companies because I was like one of the few people that knew how to make websites at the time. Jesus. So I just quit that and I had like a real job. Just going to die of coke so I keep those doors. I've said this before, but you're like far as gump of dirt bags. Yeah. Mom was the executive assistant to fucking date Thomas. He's eating in the test kitchen. So you saw him on a regular basis? Yeah, like all the company picnics and parties and stuff. Yeah, back then. Yeah. Hey, Brian. Yeah. Are you quite ready? I don't know. Like, I mean, I was young as fudge. But, uh, but back then, yeah, I remember seeing him all, especially the Christmas ones and stuff. Damn. I loved him. Yeah, me too. He's great. Yeah. What a fucking run of the company. He's doing the commercials. What was the best thing out of the test kitchen that you tried? Um, I don't remember, but I do remember. I think it was like, they had to take a run at a big man before it was Baconator. It was something else. It was like big bacon something. Oh, we were talking about the big bacon classic. Yeah. Yeah. That was fantastic. So a little bit different than the Baconator. Yeah. And I've let it sit to me. Yeah. Never mind. Big bacon classic. I didn't say anything. I loved the big bacon. Yeah. But, uh, Baconator is pretty good too. Yeah. Then it became like, I think the Baconator. Whoa. Huh. It's fascinating stuff. Did you ask him about the big cake? That's a strange. Oh, vacations. So I, uh, the big bacon, the big bacon classic. To me, it's like, why are you talking about a whole wacky one? So we always went to, you know, Midwest Florida, which was Myrtle Beach. Like you guys probably used to go to Myrtle Beach a lot. I'm guessing. No, we never made it that south. We stopped that jurid. It was Jersey and then every now and then. I like it. You asked that. I make your soul feel better. Yeah. You guys are probably huge losers too, right? Well, everyone in Ohio would go to Myrtle Beach. Right. It was like a version of Florida, but it was closer. But then, uh, Florida without all the hustle and bust. Yeah. When I was going to Myrtle Beach next weekend. When I moved in with my dad, uh, I lived in like a rich neighborhood. And I, one of my best friends, uh, his parents would take us to cool vacations because his dad was the president of nationwide insurance. Whoa. Still is, I think. I don't know. Right. But, uh, so he would take us to like Kewa Island and like, what's Kewa Island? It's like a golf island outside of the Carolinas. Whoa. It's so awesome though. Yeah. You ever go to Putten Bay? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Putten Bay. I used to go there once a year. Shout out to it. Yeah. Um, Brian Redband was the friend that went on vacation with the other kids. That's a tough, that's a tough characteristic to have growing up. Yeah. It was weird. You probably fitted very well. It was weird because they would have to buy me presents also when they, you know what I mean? Like, what do you mean? Like, when you're, uh, on vacation with your kid, you know, you'd be like, hey, honey, you want to be a Teddy bear? Uh, Teddy bear or whatever. Yeah. If I were a big lollipop and a fucking propeller, thanks so much Mr. - Mr. Jenkins. - I'm sure your dad would give the money or something. - Nation. - No, no, no, no, no. - Pay your airfare and shit. - Yeah, they paid everything. It was great. - She, boys are fucking crazy. - Yeah, she was, he's dying and loaded. - That's like two rich guys, you guys. - Yeah, you get this one, I'll get the next one, type thing. - Wow. - Yeah, they were loaded. - Kevin's talking about Werby Paka. - Werby Parker. - Big, big fan, as you know, I'm a Werby guy. - I know that, you know. - Contacts eyeglasses, I'm into it all. - Don't shut up about them. - No, you can do the virtual on the website, try on stuff. And the good thing that they have, that the other places don't have, is some places you go through, they got style. Prices are out of control. Some places you go to, they got good pricing. - But the styles are, you look at your seventh grade math teacher, Werby Parker has it all. Do yourself a favor. 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One, none which drawable, reward, redeemable, nationwide based on sports book predictions and free-to-play sports contest available, varies by state, terms at dkng.co/offer. Limited time offer. DraftKings, do it. Any summer camp. Other than the Wendy's burger. - No, just the Wendy's summer camps. - What would you do there? - Well, a lot of times it was at the Columbus Zoo, which is like-- - They can't produce sleep there. - Slept there at the zoo in this-- - Oh fuck, whoa. - I don't know if you know Jack Hanna. - Fuck, that's not a camp. - Do I know Jack Hanna was there? - Yeah, he was our camp counselor. - Shut the fuck up. - He would all be like, got her sleeping bags in like the reptilian building or something and he would come out with like a baby bag. - Is he based out of Columbus? - Yeah, that's his zoo. - Told you Ohio's fucking sweet dog. - I thought that was Jack Hanna doing a corporate. They're like, "Hey Dave Thomas, "I want you to come in. "We're gonna give you 50 grand dog, then he's good." - Well, yeah, it's connected with Thomas. - Yeah, and we got the Lex Wexner Victoria Seeker model. - Well, he's a big guy, right? - Who's Lex Wexner? - He's on the list. He's a-- - Oh, that's how Epstein got all high. - He was in all this class. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And he would come? - Well, he lived there and he built a-- - That's the zoo? - No, no, I'm just saying in Columbus Freak, but at the mall, you would see him all the time and you would have just like five hot women with him in the mall. It was always so nice. Was he boys with Dave Thomas? - No, no, I'm just saying that he lived in Columbus also. Like, Columbus is crazy, like the secrets. (laughing) - The secrets. - No, what was the name of the high school you went to? - I went to Worthington Kilborn High School. - Yeah, Worthington Kilborn, man. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Let's see if he's on the notable alumnus. - No, no. - He might be on the notable alum of Columbus. - Oh, oh, yeah. - Yeah. - Dave Thomas, Jack Hanna. That's what you were talking about. - Brian Redbyt, guys. - Me and Young James. - And Steve and his crew. - His flunkies. - Jack Hanna could take a week off of work. - Go do that work. - No, he's that work. That's where he-- - Oh, he was based out of the Columbus. - That was his zoo. - That's where his zoo. - Jesus Christ. - I don't even have a fucking professional alumnus. - He just wrote Columbus and spelled it wrong. (laughing) It's not spelled with a gate. - What do you got, Luke? - Not an alumni tragedy. - Are you using my red band last name? - I just did, I just did, I'm not saying. - I never thought that wasn't your last name. - Obviously, it's not now that I think of that. - I'm not saying a Brian. What's your government name? - Is it Brian? - It's Brian. - It's Brian. - R-E-I-C-H-L-E. - Brian? - Brian? - Brian? - Brian? - Brian? - You got it. - Brian? - Brian. - Brian. - Red bands your showbiz name? - Yeah. - That was actually my AOL screen name. - And then Rogan. - That was your AOL screen name? - Yeah. - There were no numbers. You were just red bands? - It's Red Band 420, of course, by the way. - So you are a born dirt bag, is he's connected? - I know, but he had a duty, he's had every opportunity. The rich dad, the nice neighborhood, and he's-- - I can't. - He's gone astray at every fucking point. - Well, what's crazy is my dad, his side of the family, was the dirt balls, the poor side. And my mom was the rich side, like my mom's, my grandpa on my mom's side, president of Ford tractor, you know, road work too. - How are you in a one-bedger? - Huh? - I don't know. - I'm on the Ford tractor money. - Yeah. - But my step brother, my dad's side, you know, he owned a CB shop, you know? - You're shit like that. - Step brother on your dad's side. - Yeah. - But your dad had multiple marriages. - Before your mom. - Yeah. - Man. - Yeah. - Multiple marriages. - How many step brothers did he have? - I have a step brother, step sister. - Different moms? - No, same mom. - What a dad married now? - Yeah, but he's been married after my mom, he's been married since. - That's pretty good. - No. - What do you do? - She was an executive secretary for AEP, American electric power. - Dad's gonna tell you. - What the hell's going on? - He got a girl with a bonnet and a fucking - You run some type of inside. - I don't know what it is. - That's wild. - It's like the Dollar Tree Illuminati something here. - It is also the way, if you think about it, he's been this his whole life. - Yeah. - Is that the forefront of podcasting? - Forefront of the internet. - Forefront of fucking, the test kitchen at when? - This is what I'm saying, he's been fucking, he's been at the car, he's been at the car. - Look too much coincidence. - Mr. Red Band. - Oh, I agree, I agree, it's weird. - I don't know, it's weird. - I don't know, I keep falling into this shit. - Yeah. - Wow, okay. - All right. - Huh, what was the first car? - Renalt alliance. - You had a renalt. - 1984 Renalt alliance, am I? - That's weird. - Well, who the fuck has that? - Who was the prototype? - That was the car you would see. That was like seeing a pujo on the street. - Yeah, well, it was my cousins and she, it was her old car, my mom's side. And it was like, all wrecked up and stuff. My dad bought it for a dollar for tax reasons or stuff. But he used that car to teach me, 'cause he's an engineer, so he made me always change my alternator clutch. - Yeah, do all the-- - And to do that stuff? - Yeah, well, I could probably do it now. It's been so long. He showed me how to do body putty and redo that stuff. - That was like a project, you know? - It was like a project. - That's pretty cool. - Yeah, you looked at the Renalt alliance after like a year. It looked like a brand new car. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That's all right. - I remember they would turn on and like rattle. - Yeah, they were city. - That's odd. - Yeah. - Renalt, where'd you get parts for that? - Junkyard, we used to go to the junkyard and like pull it from other cars and stuff like that. - I respect it. - Yeah. - Huh, what was the first concert you remember going to? - Pointer sister. So, highest state fair, right when that song jump came out. - Holy shit, the Pointer said that. - At the fair. - Was anybody famous in that? Wasn't like, not Diana Ross but somebody like that in the Pointer sisters and then launched a career after that? - I don't. - Oh, they on their own. - I think they're still the Pointer sisters. - And did they do the neutron dance for Beverly Hills cop? - I'm just burning it. - You know anything about that young man? - No. - Oh gosh, you're missing out, man. You want to miss him much? - I think I'm gonna think I'm gonna manage. - Interesting lineage. - Yeah. - Of the Rikle family. - What was the supermarket they were shopping at? - Croger. - I respect the Croger. - Yeah, that was my first job was a bagger, a Croger. - Nice. - And stuff like that. - Yeah. - You just wanted Kevin's heart. - I wasn't shut up about his time at. - At me. - Somebody's clearly jealous. - What's the code for bananas? - The code for bananas? - Obviously it's 4-E-11. - Oh. - Oh. - What was the next situation? - You're gonna embarrass me if I let me show off my produce code knowledge? That just backfired in your face. Great, 4-08-8. (laughing) - We don't care. - Red Vintamato's 4-0 is that true? - Check it. - You could Google what the fuck the bickinator was if it was the bickinator. I guarantee I'm right on that. - Yep. - And other facts that I've said. (laughing) - But I may or may not have alluded to. - Okay. Let's see, we gotta put our beef aside. (laughing) - Me too. - Mr. Bryan, what's the dirt ball through and through? - I know. It's odd. He's a specific type of fucking. Well, how did he when he got your passport? Oh, uh, yeah, probably no, I, I think the first time I got my passport was because I worked with Joe and I had to go to Canada. Yeah. So it was like, yeah, it's probably like 35. That's not great. When did you start working for Joe? 30 when I was 30 years old. So 22 years ago, when did the podcast blow up and start making a bunch of money? We didn't start the podcast to see. Well, I did that car was been seeing a video. That was 2007. And I just going back to Roy's making the rounds again. Yeah. 2000 around 2010 is when we started. And it blew up within like the first month we're doing it. It was originally we weren't even going to do it as a podcast. We're just doing it as like a like a YouTube live stream type thing. And then people are like, I want to listen to it at work. So then I just took the audio out of those streams and just started throwing it up as a podcast. Again, the forefront. That's what I'm saying. Hmm. Interesting. This guy's this guy's tapped in or he's he's like a Manchurian candidate. He's operating and he don't know why red band might be either from the future or an alien. We're not sure. Did you hear how I even met Joe? I do the quick version of this. This is scumbaggy as hell. Respect. And college. My favorite band was nine snails. And this is before before internet. There was no internet. And I just remember I was like shurming with it and I looked on the back. And I noticed that is his publisher was Cleveland. And I was like, Oh my God, you know, I'm right right. A letter. So I worked at a music store at the time. And I wrote a letter to the address on the back of the CD. And I go, Hey, my name is Brian. I own or I work at this record store. And I have this newsletter. And I give it out, you know, all the time. And I was like, true. Was that true? No, it wasn't true. But I was like, I would love to be able to do an interview for my nine-year snail newsletter. I call it ninhead instead of deadhead. And then they actually wrote me back or called me back. And they go, yeah, send us a copy. We'd love to see it. And I was like, Oh, shit. So then I went to the library. I had all these magazines. I've like tried to write it. And I just wrote out and copied pays had fake letters to the editor that I wrote myself. You know, put this whole like 10 page news. Yeah, it's set to my 10 page newsletter. All the Xerox copied. We love it. Any show you want backstage, anything like Marilyn Manson, anything on the record label you can go. So then I just start going to nine snail concerts and just hanging out with Trent Resner in the back and had my camera and got to. Do you know Trent Resner? Back then, I, yeah, he would interact back. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's almost famous. You what? I photos of him when I was a kid. If you type in like, Brian, Brian, Brian, right, man, Trent Resner. You can see like a picture of me wearing a stucy hat. Shout out to Stu. See, I was a great brain. How old are you at the time doing this? 19? Oh, shit. Yeah. It's like almost famous. Right. So then I started doing that for other bands. And then I started doing it for Doug Stanhope because I got into. You weren't still right in the fake newsletter, were you? No, I had to do that once. Never got busted for that. No. No one checked up on me. Did you ever be like, yeah, I'm canceling the news that I was going to focus on my photography? No, I just would take photos. I'd be in the front row before the front row and just sitting up there, like taking photos in between the state and the gate. I was there one time for a band. It was the coolest ever band. The men singers. I came up because you're a comedian. And I was with my now life. And I was like, I had a cool new jacket on too. Remember that cool denim jacket? Yeah. The coolest I ever been was for one second. I got to shake it down for a couple of ticks of the show about them. They're coming to Cleveland. What show? Men singers. Okay. Go see him on Cleveland or in Brooklyn. All right. Now it feels like an all-fair conversation. Yes, Dave Thomas. Red bands come with me. He's taking photos. If anybody has been writing the newsletter. So when I got into comedy, I knew how to make websites and stuff. So I started doing Doug Stanhope's website. How'd you meet Doug? I just reached out to Doug. I think email at the time. I also used to talk to Luis a K back in the day and email. But I used to. You're that guy. Yeah. You're the guy that wrote Gary Shaling the letter. Yeah. And then went and got to meet him. Right. Yeah. So then I started doing all the stuff or Doug and making videos. This was before there was YouTube. So in the internet was slow. But I was really good at compressing videos. Really small. So that you can go on your website and with a 56 K modem, it would load up and play a video before YouTube. And how would you do this? I just press it because I remember I went to college. I went to the first college guys. You know, I knew I was a nerd back then. I can write code and all that stuff. That's the cool guy you see before us. Yeah. The Mick Cafe. Cheers. All right. And then Joe saw it. Joe saw it instead. Joe saw it on Mr. Rogan saw it on Doug's. So you really get put a lot of these pieces in place for everything you see in front of you. He wouldn't be here. No, we wouldn't. You're not getting the share of this. And you know what? Everybody always says write a letter. I wrote a letter to fucking Big League two thinking they would send me a bunch of stuff and they never fucking responded. Hey, dear Dickens. I love you, gum. Wow. That's crazy. Yeah. So then nice Joe started doing shit for Joe. And then one day Joe was just like, Hey, you want to move to California and work for me full time? Yeah. And that's how it all what the free. Wow. That's pretty crazy. I mean, but also at heart. You lied. You fake the resume. You cheated. You made a fake nine-inch nails publication to get in there. Yeah. That's all right. It's on his resume. That's like, you know Dave Thomas. Okay. The only thing that's true. I swear to God. To picture him in a Santa Claus outfit. Jack Anas. Hold on. These are my bullies. All right. Now let's get into today and the general human behavior of Mr. Redman, which this could go surprisingly or it could go the way of the Mick F.A. I got I got I got one we haven't touched on in a while. Nice easy start off. When you're putting the odor on you put the shirt on then the odorant or the deodorant then the shirt. I've learned from many, many years of making mistakes and forgetting to always put the shirt on first because I don't know how many times I've looked down it and I see the bigger guy, you know, it's tough. Yeah. I just thought you saw it. I did it. I did it. I did it. When we were selling merch, we put it on to take pictures of and someone's like, do those shirts go into the odor and say the right. It's embarrassing. It's so embarrassing. This is the thing that I don't get about it. We've talked about this a lot. I've never really used the anti-perspirant deodorant. I'm always a deodorant guy and I never get the white shit. I always get the clear. Whatever the rubber ball looking stuff. Yeah, I don't know. Different. I don't know. But that's still good. I like the old spice like all the fun wolf ones and stuff that smell like pez. Yeah, they have like old spice that's like this whole line. Like I think I'm wearing Superman old spice during. But they all just Mario. No Superman body. And it's just smells like candy. I love it. Oh, yeah. Man, you're a dirt bag. That stuff. That's the one I'm wearing. That's Superman one. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What do you use in body wash? I'm just gonna get by stick. Yeah. You are. It's old spice. Yeah. I love it. I said you guys have different. Oh, yeah. Set up. You guys have different. Yeah. You have multiple showers in your place, right? Yeah. But we used the same shower, but different bad terms. I blew my own up. She had blowsers up. Got you. Different toilet. Yeah. Different toilets. Yeah. You do well. Of course. What kind of toothbrush are you working with? I just got a new sonic care one. Okay. This is the question. Have you ever used an electric toothbrush when it wasn't charged? And just brush absolutely. Of course. So that feels ungodly when it's weird when you do figured on that. Yeah. Are all the screens in your home intact? Screen. Oh, they are actually. They are. Which is because you know what? I learned you just never take them out. Yeah, it's probably the best bag. You never touch them. Yeah. And without getting to personal, what is the property situation? You guys you stole the apartment downtown in Austin? Yeah. That's my studio. Do you own that or rent that? I rent that. Okay. But that's just, you know, you know, do podcasts and stuff. Right? And then you guys own the house on the house, bought it right when I moved to Austin. Right. And then literally a month after buying it, Elon Musk goes, moving Tesla to Austin, all these companies started saying that house, uh, double in price in like six months. Again, at the forefront of real estate. He was there before Musk. Before before before he really smith is the great Kelly, he has all the comedy podcasting. Then right at the forefront of the Austin comedy scene. Pretty wild. Pretty suspicious. It is suspicious. Which some industry plant, dude, which some ancient astronauts theorist would suggest. Keep it talking about factor factor factor factor our favorite factor. Yeah. Healthy, delicious on the go. You got the holidays coming up. You're going to be overeating eventually. You know what I mean? The fall is going to creep in. You're going to want that pumpkin pie. Do your sub favorite. Keep it lean. Keep it tight now with factor with over 170. Five band ingredients. Every factor me was designed around what supports a healthier lifestyle and nothing that doesn't. Mm hmm. With over 100 band ingredients. Yeah, they're band and ingredients going this. This don't take this. Don't cut the this don't cut the turkey. This is bad for you. We're getting it out. They don't want it. Get it out of our kitchen. I don't even want a lot. I don't care where you got to get it out of here. These guys. Listen, we've been with factor for a long time. Should jump. I found factor before the before they were a sponsor. You get in. Listen, it takes the chaos out. It takes them. You talk about food noise. I'm thinking about this. I think about that. It takes it out. You go. I got something good at home. I can throw it in. I'll be eating in two minutes. Even if I want to get take out it. that's gonna take 25, 30 minutes, two minutes I'm eating. It's the path at least resistance a lot of time. For me personally, that's all I know. And right now, let's eat real head to factormeals.com/garbage50off and use the code garbage50off to get 50% off and one free breakfast item per box for one year. While supplies last until 10, 31, 26, that's code [email protected]. [email protected], see website for details. - Do it. - Do it. - What's the, we got a pool at the house? - No, we got a hose. - I was told by many people that pools are way too expensive and their money dumps. You're just gonna be constantly spending money. And the neighborhood, I mean, - We're talking old guys at a barbershop. - Live your life, get a pool, what are you nuts? - But the neighborhood that we live in, we have private, like, by multiple private, huge Laplace community pools, but it's only for our neighborhood. And it's not that big of a neighborhood. So. - Yeah, it's nice. - I know, right. - But all right. - It's brand new too. - It's brand new. - It's the first pool in Austin. - That heat with a backyard, no pool, it's fucking loose. - Yeah, I just stand inside. - Yeah, but the downtown place I suppose to. - Right, Joey was telling us. - Oh yeah, he's moving in with it. - He's moving in. - I'm moving in with Brian Redbaid. - Oh, that's right. - Yeah, that's right. - Got a pool there. - I got to have Redbaid in there. I go down, I smoke a Joey Redbaid in there. - That's gonna be fun. - It's gonna be great. - He's gonna be staying there. - Yeah, once, when we, - You'll see him at the house. - Yeah, one week every month, he's gonna be there and stuff like that. - Do you guys do some sleepovers there? - Oh, yeah. - Cuts out a standard camera. Rub my feet. - Let's watch him. - He's gonna get kicked out so fast for smoking. - Shit. (laughing) - Okay. - Do you remember the name of the first strip club you went to? - Yeah, it is, the living room. - Date, no, why? - Well, I living room. - Oh. - The living room? - Well, it started off, I don't know if this is true. It started off, it was actually someone's living room. - Right. - And they just, they got so popular, they just start building off on it. - Oh, man, look at that photo. - It got, that is a classic. - It got destroyed by tornado. - Just 300 years? - No, no, no, it's not around anymore. It's got destroyed by a tornado. - Oh. (laughing) - But that's the-- - It sounds old, not at the pole. - Sounds biblical. - Yeah, that place was dirty though. That, like-- - Oh, you don't say. - Yeah. - Okay. - You ever donate money to a mega church? - No. - Do you know how to tie a tie? - Yes, that was a boy scout. - Boy scout? - Boy scout? - And an eagle scout. - Yeah, yeah. - What's the last time you stole something? - Ooh, I mean, like shoplifting style or steal stuff. - What's the difference? - You know, like-- - What are you stealing? - Stealing, like IP addresses, you know, from China and stuff. But-- - Oh. - So you can do all that stuff now. - Tell you got her. - Okay. - It's been a while. - It's been a while. I used to, I mean, I used to shoplift all the time. And I got caught for shoplifting when I was younger. Stealing CDs. - Everybody got caught. - Stealing CDs. - Did you get sat down with Dave Thomas? - No. - And started to hard conversation with you. - I would have loved that. - Ghostbusters 2 Soundtrack and Paula Abdul, those were the CDs I got caught. - I respect it. - But no, I haven't, I don't even remember the last time. - Picture of in jail, what are you in here for? Paula Abdul. - I don't remember the last time I stole it, but I used to steal it. - So you're not the airport steal guy? - No. - Like Ari Schaffer and then the likes of the other-- - Oh, no. - So it's like Joey Bums. - Joey Diaz will go to one of those places where you know, you just pick your food out. You just put his pocket back, it's crazy. - I can't do that. - I can't do that, scary. - What? - Where are Mr. Diaz's resume? - What kind of luggage you got? You got name brand luggage? You just use them, anything, non-descript. - No, you still always use Samsonite. You know, like just in this place. - Yeah, just replace it every year. Almost it'll break. - Yeah. - A new one. - Okay. - Ross, you get 'em at wrong. That's why they're breaking every year. That dude. That's dirtbag shit. Never going to a wedding and not giving a gift. - Never did that. - No. - Somebody got married. What do you drop it in the envelope? - Come to my life. - I like you. - I usually just do the, like, if they have a. - Registry, you do? - Well, because it's easier, you know, then here's a hundred bucks. I don't know. I could buy them like a. - A hundred. Red bin. - Red bin. - More from everything. - Yeah. - I often don't get a wedding gift, there. - I don't get a few nor's or weddings. - How many starts can you wear shorts? I ain't going. How many suits do you own? - Ooh, like four. - Anything nice? - No, they're all just like, you know. - Men's wearing a hat for that shit. - Do you want any costumes? - Tons of costumes. I have a lot of costumes. - You do. - Yeah, a lot of. - You guys don't do cosplay and stuff, do you? - No, but I. - I don't think they don't. - Yeah. (laughing) - Now, I have a lot of costumes, like Halloween shit, and just from the years of doing podcasts and shit like that. - That makes sense. - So I do have a lot of costumes. - You got a walk-in closet at the house? - Yeah. - We have like, yeah, multiple four. - We have a McMansion, you know. - Yeah, yeah. - It's a McMansion. - Like there's rooms, we're pretty clean, pretty tight. - Okay. - There's rooms we haven't been in, like for like a year though, you know, like bedrooms and stuff like that. - You spend a lot of time in the gaming room. - Living room. - Right, yeah. - He's both play video games. - Yeah. - Just got a Pimbal machine, you know. - That's sick, what kind? - They're so expensive. Way more expensive than you anticipate. - Pokemon limited edition. - They only sell 750 of them. - Yeah. - What do you mean they sell 750 of them? - Yeah. The limited edition, they only made 750. - Oh, they only made 350. - Oh, yeah. - Wait, how much did it cost? - $13,000. - What? - $13,000, what a fucking Pimbal machine. - Yeah, you're dropping a hundred bucks in a wedding? - It's worth like 20, 22 already though. That's why I got that one. - Is it the four front of Pimbal machine? - Yeah. - Were you a Pokemon guy? - No, not really. I like the cartoon and stuff, but you know, not much. - You were watching cartoons very late in life. - I was, yeah. I still watch cartoons, I love to. Yeah. - I don't wanna say that much. - But not that far into, I think. - He's into like Yoji Go or what's it called? Gunho? - Yo. - No, what's the fireball guy? - Dragon Ball. - Yeah, it's Dragon Ball. - You like Dragon Ball? - I like Dragon Ball, yeah. - You do, you like all the Japanese anime? - I love it, Japanese anime, yeah. My best friend growing up was Japanese. And so. - Wasn't an October, yeah. - So when Nintendo came out, he had the Nintendo like a year before it came out in the US. So I was going to his house playing Mario Brothers and before anyone even knew what Mario was. - In the forefront of Nintendo. - That's right, I forgot that is true. - This is adding the fuck up. (laughing) - What the fuck? - Yeah, that's weird. Is there anything you could think of that you had dibs on first? - Oh. - Like Pepsi clear or anything like that? - Uh. - The blue raspberry flavored and candy? - Yeah, Columbus, Ohio also is a test market town. We had Chipotle like 10 years before they would have had Chipotle and stuff. And then McDonald's bought it, I think. - Yeah, I can. - I didn't know that's how they did it. That actual city's word test. I thought they went around. - Oh yeah. If you go to Columbus right now, there's so many things you've never heard of, dog. - White castle, you know, was-- - I've seen those. - You started there? - I started there but it was like, one of their first-- - Tested that house there. - One of the incubators. - I don't know, that's not testing on them out there. - Wily known as Test City USA. - What the fuck? - I don't know what they got there. What's in what's in current test right now? - Yeah. - Is that where the comedy addict is in Columbus? - Yes. - There's a Bloomington. - Yeah, comedy addicts in Columbus. - That's where we were. - No. - Upstairs? - That's-- - Yeah, it's downtown Columbus. - No. - You sure? - The comedy addicts in Bloomington, Indiana. - Oh, Indiana. - You sure? - I don't think it is. I think-- - I'm not saying there's not a comedy addict there but I think the one we did. - Okay. - The funny bone is the club I started off in Columbus Ohio but now I think it's the comedy addicts. - There is a comedy addict. That is not the comedy addict that we went through though. - Okay. - Yeah, no. That's not it. But we are both correct. There is a comedy addict there. - You have a white grease off your finger and put it in a soda. - As an adult off your face? - Yeah. - Oh, yeah. - I did that all the time. - For soda? - Yeah, for soda. - No, just anything with foam. - Beers, yeah. 'Cause the alcohol killed that. - You're doing it with sodas and then you're gonna go with-- - I'm not doing it as a grown man. I did it as a kid. - Oh, I do it all the time. - Mr. Reddant. - I do it mostly for beers, though. - Yeah, beers, of course. - You look nice. - Yeah. - Oh, that's an air. - Oh, babble, baby. - It's getting a little crevice. - Okay. - Okay. - How do you sleep? You guys got a king size bed? - Of course. - California king, yeah. - California king. - I have a lot of pillows. - Three, one for head, one to hold like a baby and one in between the legs. - It's exactly how you-- - Are you facing out? Are you facing it? - I have to switch every 30 minutes because my arm falls asleep or-- And now I have tremendous arm pain and back issues from that. - Sure. - I don't know if sleeping like that is good for your bed for you. - It's bad. - It is? - Yeah, you're supposed to sleep on your back, but I can't 'cause I'll choke and die. - Yeah. - Do you have some sleep apnea? - I'm sure I do. That's why I sleep on my side and it's why don't you-- - You should go get a machine. - I don't want that, dude. - Why? - They're great, I know. - I'm telling you. - I'm going ahead. - Hey, what are you taking from me? It's not like the 50s. You get a good one? They're soft, plus that noise makes you feel like you're in a spaceship to fall asleep. - I'm sure Janice will love that. - Speaking your language now. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Do you ever go to karaoke song and will you do karaoke? - Yeah, my favorite was always radio head creep and then I used to-- - I used to sing along that. - Yeah, I just sing along that. - That's fresh of your shit. - Didn't fucking Chappelle started doing it all the time and I'm like, I can't do this anymore. That's just a Chappelle song. - Man, Chappelle is stealing your material. (laughing) - For fun again. (laughing) - You guys have a cleaning service at the house? - Yeah, we have a lady that comes every couple of weeks. - Well, it's the grocery shop and being down over at the house. - We go like multiple times a week. - I like that. - I do that too. - We live by a Costco though. We're just kind of spoiled, like it's super HE. So we live all by all these nice grocery stores. You guys like hitting like little specialty stores like We were talking I think in Austin and H. Mart you like to do that kind of oh H. Mart's Yeah, we have like two different like Tokyo The monthly Tokyo treats and then we have another one. That's like a different country every month You know like what do they get? Subscription subscription like where you're getting like different kick cats from different countries Like that green tea kick cats all that stuff. You go to our house and you up up the closet It looks like a candy store just from all these different like we need to cancel these subscribes I would imagine and I could be wrong a lot of plush Animals at the at the home you guys are in the stuffies Maybe this week I bought three new ones. So yes Yeah, I have a lot of those I use them as pillars I use them as pillows and stuff. Yeah, that's normal Like when you're on the couch. What do you have I have a big dolphin is like a head pillow I have like a hot blue sea like the side pillows like a hot a huge hot dog Amazon man Amazon What's one set you back? I've never been in the market for some what's that how much how much is like 20 bucks for a big one These are giant ones. How many think you have put a number on it? The missus isn't all this stuff, too. You guys are very like much piece of pot. Yeah, we have about 25. I would say 20 Yeah, we have one that's like a Pikachu. It's like this big. It's great The house probably the house is probably cozy. Oh, dude. You I know you would I mean my house looks like this You know, it's it's just toys and shit everywhere. I was I did I stayed that sleep it on your couch and all that stuff in the games And it came to you guys. Yeah, I probably I probably wouldn't leave. Yeah, exactly my vibe Yeah, it's my five watching G.I. Jews and stuff like that Pac-Man in the garage, you know What game are you playing right now? I'm not really playing a game right now. I'm not playing a game stuff. He's I know with us. What game you played right? I don't remember I'm not going on. Well, you don't have a spit. You're not doing call it duty or whatever the kids are doing now Who? I'm doing the pinball right now, so I'm not really into the game You're back to the analog. Do you sit down when you play pinball? You have a chair there like a bar stool That's that's old guy to bully now. Oh, you earthquake. That's crazy When you play your games you guys have a gaming computer. You play it on a system We have all the systems and we have a couple gaming computers, but lately it's been we have the little steam decks So we've been using it. It's like a it's like a Nintendo Switch but it plays I don't want to know somewhere PC games. Hmm PC games. Yes, it's like a switch for your PC games like this steam deck Yeah, what's it? Is that a brand? Yeah, that's a brand. What's a PC game like you know? Like if you're playing games on your PC, okay, but you can play it handheld. Okay, yeah So you know how to play on the computer with the computer. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean that will you prefer I used to but now it is the PlayStation PS5 so great. So yeah What's that added? What are the what are the cars you got? Have an electric Hummer You are it does again. It does the crab is every character an entourage rolled into one It does the crab walk dude that electric Hummer is the probably does the crab wall Yeah, where it does the sideways thing or you can go down the street like only when you play Cisco Type-in king crab walk a Hummer to park the car Yeah, you can do shit like that. It's more for fun But the cool thing is the whole roof comes off and fits into the front trunk and you have a convertible Hummer It's the best I have When there's solar roofs though the Tesla solar roof where it looks like a regular roof, but it's like hard like shingles and Tesla batteries, so I got rid of almost oh I got great. I'm off the grid What in your home? Yeah, and it's Because our neighborhood kept on getting beat up from like hail and storms and everyone's getting the roof Replace all the time and I'm like I didn't want a stronger roof and then I was like oh this Tesla roofs like like it's like bulletproof and Really it's it's a solar so then I got a bunch of batteries. Yeah, it's like it's like really hard like it's aluminum Or what I actually I think it's like tempered glass, but it's super strong glass But now so I I'm off the grid and a free electricity for all my cars So I got rid of all my like my super and stuff. I got rid of all my gas cars and Why is the electricity free once you pay for the roof? They don't charge you a monthly fee or anything I paid for the roof and then you know, I'm making so much electricity back that I'm selling it back to the Back in the grid so now I have credits. I like like my bills like negative $500 and that's Charging I just keep TVs on for no reason. I assume the Electric company doesn't like that, right? No, they they're buying electricity. No, they you're getting them electric Yeah, they love it. Yeah, how much is the roof? It was pretty expensive I did get 100 grand it was 300 grand, but I got I got like a hundred and fifty back from the government because I got it So it's like really yeah credits sharp guy. That's crazy. Yeah, I want to sleep there even more But I got a Hummer and I got three Teslas if three Teslas. Yeah, are you an environment guy? No, I just once you go electric car Like that instant tron power You know and it drives me home like it's so good at driving now that it just almost all always just take me to work Take me to McDonald's you know take me wherever you go You on your phone doing your thing? Yeah, sometimes, but it's also just fall asleep. No, I don't do that because it Films you to make sure you don't fall asleep. Yeah, you honest was telling us to track your eyes You can't not you can't look away. Well, it's supposed to be that how far away. You think we are from that About a year I mean it's it's so good right now. You could do it now. I think it's more of like a legality to it Like you're not allowed to be checked the fuck out. Yeah right once you to say I mean it can't do anything if if I'm in a car And I'm trying to hit you. I can't do anything about that. It would detect you coming at me and Dodge and and really yeah Stop being a dickhead. It is way safer than like I trust it way more than an Uber driver It's it's it's better than like most drivers I know it's better than my girl driving I think She's Asian so hey Brian. I didn't know you're Asian. Yeah Stunned by bees I mean You know I mean you got any nickel at the house nickels. Oh Yeah, yeah, I just got my first one. Yeah, it's pretty nice. It's your fun snacks. Yeah video games cartoons community pool Don't very well sharp guy, but you don't get a lot of credit for it And I've told you this multiple times. I know you like to hat when you have the hat off. Oh, yeah, go look at dude Go look at dude. Not that you're not a good looking dude all the time. Take the hat off the way to here is I love it Got the salt and pepper I'm telling you now your hair is amazing. Thank you You guys gonna bone or what? We're boys guys put the car put the put the car in self-training I remember me and you'll I remember me and you laughing at Admitsies about when you go to a diner in the order and entree. They treat you completely differently Treat like a celebrity Right this way you get the soup and salad the bread basket. They drop a lip candle Man, huh, what are you guys doing for dinner to know you want to hang out Usually, what do you guys do is anybody cooking? We we door dash or uber eats probably twice a day on average I would assume that yeah, and a lot of what we're talking about a lot of times is just like Starbucks or Sydney or give me someone T. You know, but we're doing usually lunch and then What's a lunch look like you do like one of those healthy balls or whatever? No, no, no, we usually do Like chicken or fried chicken or something You know just you guys don't eat great as far as we pretty bad like teenagers. Yeah, we yeah We you're basically two teenagers, but we also eat a lot of Asian foods, which is mostly healthy. So you know We just got back on those factors They're great. You know ready two to three minutes. I know I do it on a pain myself. I swear to God I keep it in microwave from I'm ready to go in a minute a half. They're pretty good. They're awesome. Yeah, yeah big fam So how many of those are you putting away? We I think we get like no, I don't eat that much like she eats probably twice as much as me Every fat guy says that now. I swear to God. I listen. I've said it. He said it. You don't know it's something I drink I drink my calories. You drink your cow. Yeah, I'll give you that and I like candy still I can't Just I quit drinking. I love candy. How much sour skittles. I've got a hold. Oh shit. Yeah, I got to do one at a time like Saver it. I love the skittle and gummy nerds gummy clusters. Oh those are the best. Yeah, fantastic and the white chocolate Reese's cups with The pretzel or whatever it's in it Something crunchy strike me as a big cup man cup Really White chocolate on the fritz trash It was Clint when I first learned about white. Yeah, but it was class. I said what the hell is this and the chocolate, right? I heard it's not chocolate. Yeah, it's not chocolate something milk. I thought it was just like died milk chocolate Not dying it. I don't know bleach in it. My cousin was big on that as a kid my cousin Kelly No, she got a white chocolate crucifix that was like three feet tall for Easter. I was like I don't think you should be eating that Can he then Going to hell. What do you got Luke? Uh, it's chocolate. It just doesn't uh doesn't have the cocoa powder or they're calling it cocoa mass That's chocolate. No, I mean that's chalk did the cocoa mass is chocolate. Yeah, that's what makes a chocolate Yeah, it's a blend the cocoa butter sugar and milk solid No, you How the fuck didn't you say so Dance clip How much cash you have on you right now? I usually never have cash But I think I have like a hundred dollars harm me right now. That's not bad. How many watches do you own you got to watch? I'm not a watch guy. I hate jewelry watches anything around me. Yeah, it freaks me out It's so hard for me to wear this. It's an Apple watch, but it's so hard for me. It's the big one though It's just the you could get different bands for it. Oh, even the face where do you get all your Technology news Coming out all that kind of stuff because you're dialed in with that shit. Yeah, I mean I watch a I'm a I watch only YouTube pretty much everything I watch as YouTube Uh-huh, so I watch a lot of elect be like tech news and stuff like that I mean, I just that's all I do is watch like tech news. He's a smart guy Yeah, I used to I used to before podcast stuff. I used to do Reviews of like cameras and tech stuff and I was actually pretty successful doing that and then when I started getting doing JRE I was like, well, this is better. Yeah But no, like Sony would send me cameras and shit what you have back in the day I just saw a video of a Sony flying cars. That was that AI is that fake Look pretty sick. They are boy. He was raised with They do have flying cars that are like big, you know, this thing was just thing was jet. Didn't have any propeller AI I was it. Yeah, I think look cool though. Look at the thing in a blade runner Do you get fooled by AI like I see I see I don't get I think fully just That one was pretty good. I hate all that shit. I hate all that you got a lot. I get got a lot You've broken is the king of that the fight between Dr. Doom and Ronald Reagan. I should have known Well, what do you think hippie? What I guys adurped fascinating fascinating guy But I mean obviously we knew this dead the rights. We've done you a long time. You're a fucking stone cold 100% trash. Yeah, but modernized Off the grid right technologically advanced What kind of credit cards you got you got you probably got you got DMX you got the whole nine yards. Yeah, I have all that big credit limit Huh. Oh, yeah, credit's good. Oh, yeah, you do it and stuff. What you do points? Like are you like oh? Yeah, I use my points all that I mean I used to all what a vacation to Hawaii the other day like everything there you go I got the shiny new Have you seen the American Express is like a mirror coke mirror? No, I think this pat showed it to you guys, didn't she? You got it on you Man that wallet is like a 12-year-old little girl. That's crazy. It's got a zipper on the top. Hello kitty Oh, don't show it. There's it's on the back isn't sick. I look. I want one of those We'll break this down I mean, yeah, he's the garbage of the future who's running the the operation over at the house Who handles like the bills and all that kind of stuff? Who's the who's running the show? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean Yeah, he's got it together. You guys are sharp. You shit. I've always said that the two of you's together on stop If you guys want to be in a relationship with Henry Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Bryan Red Band You guys are on your this is the your fourth fifth appearance at the Madness Square Garden It's like a third or fourth. I can't I don't even know killing it. Yeah, great Love the fucking see it. We'd love to see it. Why don't we love you so much? Thank you guys so much - of course Anything you want to plug and you want to come up to sunset? Sunset strip comedy club also I have a fake band cap red seven Play a woman Yeah, love it. Just everybody knows the number was 700 billion dollars gang, we love you, we'll see you next week, peace!