Breaking Up is Hard to Do (Criminal+)

Hi, it's Phoebe. This is an episode of Criminal Plus. The show I make with Lauren Spore, co-creator of Criminal. It's very different from Criminal. My father thinks it's the better show. If you like it and want more, become a member of Criminal Plus at patreon.com/criminal. It's the very best thing you can do to support all of our work. I know you've heard me say that before, but it is really true. And right now, you can use a special promo code, join 25 to get 25% off an annual membership. Again, that's patreon.com/criminal. There's a link in the show notes too. Welcome to Criminal Plus. I'm Phoebe Judge. I'm Lauren Spore. Lauren, I have been on a journey. It's maybe one of the biggest journeys I've ever been on my life, and it has nothing to do with traveling. You also have been alongside me for part of this journey over the past 10 days. I have to say, and I don't mean this to be rude, but you have really impressed me. We are starting something new, and that is going to be a new video series. We're going to be releasing videos of interviews I do with people, and there'll be an audio version too, but there'll also be a video version that's going to live on YouTube. And you know, everyone else is doing it, so we thought, why not us? We'll try. We'll try. We'll try. And so because of this, because we were going to do video, and we haven't done it before, we decided that we were going to make my studio that I'm in in Massachusetts a lot of the time into a more of a video studio. And that meant that for the past four days, I have been there, I'm back in North Carolina now, but I've been there with very talented camera people, and more importantly, as I'm learning, lighting people, getting the studio video ready. So they did their jobs, and they did a wonderful job, but I had a job. That job, getting camera ready. Gives getting camera ready myself, and it was suggested that I should try a bit of makeup. Now, I've, of course, worn makeup in the past. I wear makeup for the live shows. I wear makeup for photoshoots when I do them. I wear makeup for big events, but I don't wear makeup in my daily life. And I think it's safe to say that you haven't applied the makeup that you've worn in the past. I mean, maybe I've screwed around a little bit with mascara, but you know, I haven't really. And so this is also the type of situation where we're going to be doing these videos often. I think we're going to be doing them, you know, for example, every day, but it's a big experiment, but I needed to know how to do this myself. You know, I wasn't someone's not going to come in and put the makeup on me every time I do a video interview. So what were we going to do? The last week, Lauren went out to Sephora and said, I'm going to buy you some makeup. I wonder if it's worth putting up the journey pictures of this makeup stages. Lauren came over to my house with a bag from Sephora and Lauren, what were you, you had just decided what you thought I might need? Yes. And I think that our criminal plus listeners are most trusted best friends. We can say Phoebe has had a little bit of a red face for the last year or so. And so one challenge for this camera project was like, how do we mitigate the redness? Lauren, we can talk about Rosacea at another show. It's a journey. Well, when I walked into Sephora, I thought to myself, she's going to need something green because I think you use green, I think if you put green makeup on top of red face, it makes the redness look better. So my, I was looking for a green product, which I found. I was looking for a translucent powder, which I got from Clinique. This was a Sephora located entirely inside of a Coles. I've ever experienced that before. I walked at the front door. When I was looking at it from the parking lot was a Sephora next to a Coles. And then I walked in the Sephora doors and I was in the Coles. And I was like, oh, I went in the wrong door. So I walked back out. And then I was like, oh, no, I guess that's right. Walked back in. And then the Sephora was entirely, it was like the middle of a donut and all around you in the Sephora you were inside of a Coles. So it wasn't, it wasn't the most that Sephora could offer. It was a little bit of a smaller selection, but I made it work. Translucent powder, guys in mascara. I got a brown eyeliner that had a brush on the other side and a La Niege lip mask, which is a product that I like, and a clear eyebrow gel and a blush stick. And so I was operating with this, when I put on makeup, I like to keep it simple and fast. You can do it in the car if you need to, you can do it with one hand if you need to. So I thought Phoebe probably wants it to be simple if she's going to do it at all. So Lauren showed up and she said, we'll just sit here at the dining table. No light needed. Don't worry about lights. We had a huge sun life, huge open bay window. And then she said, just use your fingers. Yeah, that's how I do it. Just start. Oh, and a brush. I got a nice brush. Oh, and a brush. I got a nice brush. But just use your fingers, she said. And I. To apply the green concealer. So, well, also everything, Lauren, you just kept saying, use your finger. Don't worry. Simple. Just spread it on. And so I did. And I'll tell you, I, at the end of it, I have never exactly known what the definition of a bordello is. But I looked that I worked there and had worked there overnight. It was, it was, I think it was a really, there was, I think the problem was we did a layer of green concealer, then powder, then we tried more green concealer and then more powder. So I feel like we had a layer cake. And then we, we had put the eyeliner on and then we decided, let's see how it looks with more. I heavier on. I heavier. It was just an experiment. And so we sent some photos to our colleagues and their response was. Play. Their response was, you know, what's interesting is one always wants to be polite to your colleagues. And so sometimes if you just see something that might be a little off, you don't say anything. You say, it looks great. This was so off that they couldn't stop themselves. You know, I think something to your credit, something about working with you is that you, it's like no one wants to just put, in my opinion, I feel like you invite directness. Like when you ask a question, I feel like it's abundantly clear you want an honest answer, which I find absolutely refreshing. And I wish more people operated like that. Well, they were honest. Yeah, which was great. So we needed to fix that. And so I said, just wash it off and try again later and then I hit the road. So that was like the extent of my contribution. So the next, a couple days later, I was flying to Massachusetts because it was my niece's parent teacher conferences weekend, parents weekend. So I was going to see her and she is 17. And so if you're 17, a certain type of 17 year olds, you know how to do makeup. Her makeup is wonderful. She loves to do makeup and she said to me, don't worry Phoebe, I'll take care of it. I'll teach you how to do everything. And so we laid all the products that Lauren got me out and she had some questions about some of Lauren's choices. The first thing she said is Phoebe wear the brushes. You don't have anything to put apply and I said, Lauren just says, use your fingers. And she said, she didn't really know what to say. And then she had me, she said, the first thing we're doing is she may have me put on this headband. It's a makeup headband. It has a big bow in the front of it. And she said, that's going to help. And so then she taught me, keeps her hair out of the, so you can get the makeup all the way up on your forehead. She said, I had to wear it. We have a little, we have a little video that she had me take of how I should apply the makeup. Should we play a little clip of it? Okay. Where I was, but we'll fix that right now. Okay. Do you think I need more? Do you think this is good? More? How much do you usually put? I mean, you just put a little more of the, if the, okay, yeah. But don't use the green drops or should I? You have green drops? Yeah. This? Oh, that. Oh, you can do that too. That's why you need to have like a brush. This is like, you don't. Okay. You know, one of these is her hands, I would put a little here, okay. So then I sent a picture to Lauren and I said, what do you think? And you said, can you do my makeup? I mean, it looks so good. Looks, it looks. These kids today. I don't, how did they learn? It looked fantastic. It looked fantastic. But it, it wasn't, it, it maybe was a little too much. It wasn't no makeup makeup, which is what I was going, high glam. And so then, so I get to the studio, I leave everyone and by myself, the camera people are setting up cameras and lights. And here we go. I'm on. I got to do it myself. You are unresponsive to phone calls and texts for a pretty long time. And then I just received the photo and then you knew what you had been doing with your time. What did you think? Fighting for your life with the makeup mirror. No, it looked wonderful. I was completely impressed that after what like one tutorial from me, which was helpful and one really helpful tutorial from your niece and you are now very good at putting on makeup. Well, I was absolutely impressed. So yeah, so it's a new life, it's makeup life every day or no, not every day, only when we're doing the videos. It's just going to be often. Yeah, but you know, the thing about the videos is it's been, I think, for all of us here, we've all been a little bit, you know, we know how to cut audio. We don't know how to cut video. But it's actually kind of fun. It's Katie Bishop and I were on a 6am video interview yesterday with a man in Australia. That was a little rough to get the makeup looking right at 6am. Another thing for you is you don't want to have wet hair. I think that's for you. Can you imagine turning on morning news and the newscaster had wet hair? Yes, but I have another question for you, which is you're doing some off-the-cuff videos for social media. Are you worried about the contrast being very great between an off-the-cuff, Phoebe on her way to go jogging, and then high glam Phoebe. People are they going to know it's the same person or. Anyway, the video thing is exciting. It's totally brand new for all of us. We've recorded three so far, including one with a big celeb. Yeah. Well, big celeb, it's not Beyonce. Well, it's a very famous crime writer. Yes. Fiction. Woman. Phoebe, do you have a trivia question? I do have a trivia question. Trivia with Phoebe. Lauren, in what state and at what speed is the highest speed limit in the country? It is not all over the state. It is on a section of highway. How do we bet on it? Posted speed limit. We have not been on it. So I can even, if it's be helpful, I could give you the state and then you can just pick. No, I don't want you to give me the state, but I'm going to do a pre-lam that it's South Dakota. Okay. And do you know what the speed limit would be? The Posted speed limit? 80. Okay. I will get back to at the end of the show. I'm also interested in Montana. Yeah. The only speeding ticket I've ever got in my life. Okay. What state and at what speed is the highest speed limit in America? Right before this call, I was reading about a woman named Ariel Koneg, 37. She's a central witness in a murder trial. Her husband is on trial for trying to murder her. And so at the trial, she read a birthday card that he had given to her that morning. Can I read it to you? Happy birthday angel face. This is the card that her husband gave her shortly before he attempted to kill her on a hike. There isn't an obstacle in this world too hard for me to fight through for you. You're the heart of our family and that heart is strong. You're a terrific mom. The kids and I hit the jackpot with you love always G. This is what happened. A couple of years before the husband, Gerhard, logged into his wife's WhatsApp account and saw that she was exchanging WhatsApp messages with a coworker who was also married and they they worked together at a nuclear energy company. She worked remotely and then apparently the relationship was lots and lots and lots of messages but nothing ever physical according to the wife. But the husband sometimes they were messaging all day long on weekends and always talking about sort of personal things and they had a code word. So if Ariel Koneg wanted to tell her coworker that her husband was nearby she would use this work term H-A-L-E-U and acronym for a type of nuclear fuel that they both worked with professionally. The husband finds this out. He can't stop monitoring her phone. He's obsessed with it. He confronts her and then they agree that they're going to not separate. They're going to give their marriage two years, a two-year project and then he asked his wife what do you want to do to celebrate your birthday and she said she'd always wanted to visit O'ahu and she says we can go another time. We don't have to go right away and the husband immediately books the trip, gives his wife the birthday card, gives her a necklace and then according to her and according to the prosecution, they're on this hike that's over like a rugged cliff. He grabbed her and began pushing her toward the edge of the ridge. She threw herself down and grabbed onto some shrubs and bushes and it was just screaming and screaming and then according to her, her husband pulled out a vial and a liquid and tried to inject her with something with a syringe and that is what I was just reading about. Have you heard this story? How many stories have we talked about this year of men trying to kill their wives on hikes? This leads me to a very important thing that we should talk about. Grip strength. It is one of the key indicators of overall health. This woman was doing something right if she was able to hold onto those shrubs. Grabbing hold of roots and shrubs. Grip strength. This was something we're having a graduation party this weekend and I thought I always like when we throw a party, when I throw a party, I always like there to be something. You know, it can't just be a cocktail party. There should be an event, you know, so your worst oysters or there's something, you know, some built around something. Well, we'll be testing our hand strength. Well, this is what I was thinking. Last week, Sarah bought one of these things for $23 on Amazon. It's a digital display and you squeeze it as hard as you can and it shows you your power. Sarah did hers. 68. Fantastic. Normal range. Great. And then I did mine. And I thought it would be so fun at the party to have everyone go around and you know, you have to write it on a little list. I thought you would really like that Lauren. I would really like that. Then I was thinking, I did think to myself, Lauren would love this so much for $25. Should I just get it for her for like her birthday present? You could just have you can train and test again. Do you know what mine was? What was it? Well, what's the max? I don't think there are like maybe 190. 103. Wow. Okay, I can't wait to say it. And it's fun because you're left hand, you're right hand. But anyway, grip strength. Start thinking about it if you haven't. Clearly, there are circumstances where you may need to hold on to roots or shrubs. And you need to make sure those fingers are strong enough. Speaking of fingers, Lauren, it's like Marilyn Monroe just came across the screen. Me? Yeah. Why? Just put your hand up across the screen. It's like Marilyn Monroe. Thank you. Wow. That is a. What mood do you have to be in to get that color of red on your nails? Because it looks like 1952 over there. What do you mean? What mood? It's like just classic. But I know it's classic, but it's like a Marilyn Monroe color. That bright, bright red. I feel like if you're going to spend the money, you need to do something. Although I know I'm the person who said go do it with no polish at all. But if you're going to get polished, I feel like you want to see it. You want to notice it. I just went and had my mother and I went and got manicures. Well, I can tell. Do you know what her favorite nail polish color is ever since I was a little kid? No. My entire life, it's called Grand Canyon Sunset. And so anytime we go to a nail salon together, she'll say I wish they still made Grand Canyon Sunset. And it's like such a potent memory. Is it a orangey red? It's like a brownish red. Do you remember when Nikki Silva, maybe it was Davia Nelson, the kitchen sisters. We were at some audio conference festival in New York. And I think we were doing something. We had a little part of it. But then we stayed for Davia Nelson's. The whole entire audio piece was her just reading names of lipsticks. That's right. It was great. It was wonderful because the names were so wild. Yeah, it was just name after name after name. My mom asked me an etiquette question, which I will now ask you. How early if any amount early, can you check in to a VRBO or an Airbnb with a keypad door? So if checking is that four, how early would you dare to go in? I would write to the owner beforehand and say, I'm just one, I said, I'm arriving at two. Is there any way to, so that's what I would do. I would be too scared to go to never go. I would go 15 minutes early, but I would just write to the owner and say, I'm going to be in the area. Is it possible to check in? Well, she sent me the message one hour before check in. I didn't see it until 25 minutes before check in and I said, I replied, I will wouldn't do that. And then she replied, oops, because she was already in. Lauren, I have a story that we have, I've been following this story. We all have for a little while, but there, there was movement on it this week. What? This is the story about the woman and the bees in Massachusetts. So this was, this was a few years ago. A woman, she was in her mid-50s. She showed up at her friend's house and an elderly gentleman who was being served eviction papers. He had cancer. He was sick and the sheriff's office had shown up to serve him eviction papers. His friend, this woman, shows up wearing, she's a beekeeper. And she showed up wearing her beekeeper suit with a truckload of beehives behind her. She got out of the car as, in her suit, full suit, as the deputies were trying to evict the man, serve her friend, eviction papers. She opened all of the hives and let the bees go towards the officers. Officers were sweating bees away. Beehives were falling on each other, crushing some bees. The officers were, were very stung. Some of them badly. They were all okay, but they were badly stung. She says it was an accident. She didn't know the hives opened. She, though, was in her full suit with hood. So, but she wasn't her full suit. So she did not get stung. She was convicted. A four misdemeanor count of assault and battery and two counts of reckless assault. She spent six months in jail waiting for the trial and then served another couple of weeks. What she said when they asked her, she said that she was why she opened the hives. She said she was only wanting the bees to forage on a lovely landscape. She had no intention. She was wearing the full suit. Well, I also read that she was wrestled to the ground by the police officers. And then a bunch of her bees died during that. And a queen bee dies after it stings. So if they're stinging all of the police officers, I understand it could be very dangerous if any of the officers were allergic, but it is, it's kind of creative at least. I mean, we need to, here's some creativity in the world. It's hard to imagine hearing about your friend, something bad happening to your friend and then your first thought is I'm going to load up the bees. Where's the suit? It reminds me of our, this is love episode about bees. Telling the bees. There's so many things in that that I think about, but yeah, especially, I guess like where we got the title, the idea that you have to tell the bees when someone has died. Do you say true that bees are the secret to life? That this is the marker of the health of our entire ecosystem. Yeah, I think someone's, okay, someone told me the other day that there's a woman in town who has chronic Lyme disease and that her, she's undergoing this interesting treatment where she manually stings herself up and down her spine with bees and that it is working, that of all the different treatments she's tried. Have you ever heard of this? No. But chronic Lyme is no joke. How do you make a bee? What do you hold that bee? You must hold it. And then you can just like force it to sting you. I pitched a story. Yeah. I pitched a story a couple months ago about a man who had purposefully let himself be bitten by snakes, a venomous snake so that his blood could be used as an anti-venom for others. Oh, that's interesting. I know. We're having a hard time getting him to call his back. I had a pottery teacher tell me that he had been bit by a brown recluse spider and that they used an anti-venom drug that they used at the hospital meant that if he were ever bit by a venomous snake, it wouldn't work. As though once your body's acclimated to these anti-venom medications, like you only have one chance sort of. Yeah, I think it's something to worry about. Well, certainly around here with the copperheads and all the spiders. You know you have to watch out for Lauren. What? Getting into your car because they like the coolness under cards. You've got to watch your anchors. Spiders or snakes? Copperheads. Oh my god, I have really big news, which is that in the last episode of Criminal Plus, I talked about my garbage can buckles, which I was really excited about because I thought it was keeping their raccoons from getting in. Last night, open the carport door here, a loud thrashing around and then a little raccoon popped his head out. So he had somehow like pried the plastic open, gotten in and was just in their eating. So I need to rethink the buckles, tighten the buckles. Did you let him out? No, because he let himself out. I was scared to go too close. As you know, I'm dealing with something really big, which is that I attempted to write an email to break up with my therapist. What is she's listening to this? I don't think that she is. I absolutely think she could be. What? Without ever telling me no? Oh, absolutely. Oh, I think that would be like actually like a weird violation. Don't you think? Does your therapist listen? We're just gonna. Well. No, no, no, no, no, no. But you know, I don't really have. It's kind of a retainer situation with me. I keep her on retainer a bit. It's a rather quick check in every two weeks, sometimes, 10 minutes, sometimes. So I don't want to waste a lot of her time. So. I think she gets it. I think that this is one of the more difficult social projects I've undertaken in my entire life. We discuss this this morning and you and I differed on how we would have a approached this. Well, this is what I wanted to ask the listener. I wrote, it's sort of like if you're receiving difficult professional news. So a lot of times they send an email so you have a minute to sort of digest. So I sent an email saying that I would like to discuss, but I am feeling like it's time to wind down. And then I said looking forward to your thoughts. Yeah, and I'll see you on Monday, and we'll talk. And I imagine that we'll meet a number of times to talk about it. It's not just like a goodbye forever. But I am stressed. I am stressed. And I said that I would be too. I said that the way I would handle this is not at the end of the session. At the beginning of the session, I would have said I'd like to talk about something. I was like, okay, keep going. I said I'd like to talk about something. And okay, but I've been thinking a lot about this and I've been thinking about it for a long time. And I think maybe I'm not getting as much of out of these conversations as I used to because I think I'm very different now. And I think I've changed a lot. And I've just been thinking about it at the end of our sessions, making it about you. I've been thinking about it at the end of our sessions. I'm realizing I'm not getting enough. And so this long preamble, me, it's me, I'm the problem, I'm the problem, I'm the problem. And then she says, Lauren, of course, I just want to support you in anything you want. And then you've opened. So that's how I would have now cats out of the bag. What's done is done. But I think I was worried that if I didn't sort of take a minute to choose my words carefully, that if I said I'm not getting as much out of these sessions, I could something like that could feel like an insult to her. So I wanted to make sure that I was deploying the information carefully. I planted the seed. So now she'll know what I want to talk about. Also like, what if something sort of chaotic happens the morning of the session. And then I check it out and don't bring it up. Well, I think this is, I think this is a new, it's a new level of being feeling like a grown-up. And she hasn't responded. So if you're looking for a new therapist, you may need to look no further. Oh, we're offering your services. Maybe after you hear this email that we received this week. Okay. Heather wrote, "My husband and I have been married 20 years. We've developed different views and opinions over those years. Ten years ago, we were at a breaking point in difference of political views. But one thing we agreed on, we loved criminal. It was the one thing we were able to talk about and discuss without opposition. The subtle social justice points made in personal stories relevant to current events brought us to the same page. Now a decade later, we still love criminal. And we are in the best place we've ever been." Wow. Who needs better help? We need them to sponsor us. We do. Betterhelp.com/Criminal. Should I go contact a better help therapist for advice on how to break up with my real life therapist? We also got another email about, this is so interesting, couples listening to criminal together. Here's another one we got. This This listener wrote in from Oklahoma and said, "She put on criminal during a big storm while she and her husband were sheltering in their laundromat with their animals because criminal was something we could agree on." Wow. Not just putting people to sleep, also bringing people together. I say that only because when I was doing a lot of Phoebe reads, I would oftentimes hear from couples who would tell me that they would turn Phoebe reads on at night in bed. And that's how they would fall asleep. So it would be like me as part of their couple. Oh. Okay. A thrupal. A thrupal. Speaking of romance, I was thinking about this earlier and I didn't bring it up because I just was remembering Sarah's sister used to work in a flower store, in a florist. And on Valentine's Day, she would call us at the end of the day and read to us what she remembered of the cards that people would have her dictate in their flower arrangements. Oh, that's so good. And it was shocking. Imagine. Oh, I would have just guessed it was all like, "Happy birthday!" All my best. No. No. Roger calls up and says, "Well, would you like on the card, Roger? I can't even say it." Why are things erotic? Yes. But no. Wilds up. A look into the human psyche. Yes. Yes. She would report. She could have made the stuff up. I don't know why I was just thinking about that. Can you give an example? Yeah, I'll give an example. It's totally inappropriate. Is there something like psychopathic about dictating that to a stranger who works in the floor shop and making them write it? That's what was so fast. You know what I mean? Exactly. You know, this isn't typing it in 1,800 flowers. You can type your own message. This is saying, "Yes, sir. What would you like me to say? Get ready for daddy. Big boys coming home later. Happy Valentine's Day." I made that up. You've got the gist. Anyway. Wow. I don't know why I thought about it. It's not Valentine's Day. I was really touched by the responses to the Costco episode. Yes. The number of people who are begging us to now go to Trader Joe's. We've had so many emails and calls from people saying, "Please now go to Trader Joe's. I'd be happy to go to Trader Joe's. Would you be happy to go to Trader Joe's?" Yeah. I think I'm going to lead you down those. Do you know Trader Joe's that well? I feel like you could take me around Wegmans, but I just need to say something. Because when we were in Costco, I was excited to see Tsukis brand Somosas, which is one of my favorite foods. Someone wrote in to say that they bought them because of that and that they were disappointed. I have to say that I agree. The Tsukis Somosas at Costco are bigger and different than the ones that you get at the regular grocery store and because they're bigger, they're more dried out. So you're not recommending them? Well, how was I supposed to know that the ones at Costco that look exactly the same are going to be bigger and different? Or Costco, like the individual food item, I thought would have been the same inside of them. Yeah, me too. No, that's an anomaly. That's Tsukis. That's an anomaly. It's making me suspicious. No, that's one product. One product flaw. People thought that I sounded really excited about the samples, which was mortifying to here. But thank you for listening. We got an email from Jonathan. He says, "As a fellow celter addict, I suggest the purchase of a soda stream or the lake. And you need to keep a backup CO2 bottle and you will never run out." I know. The problem is that then that requires a different type of transport. You have to make the celter and then pour it into another vessel. Yeah. And that takes a lot of space, Jonathan, thank you. Of course, I've considered it and certainly with the, I understand about the added flavors and celters. It's supposed to be terrible for us, cancer central. But I am working on, I'm working on less, you know, I, the cans, the cans are lined with plastic. Two celters is two lacroia day. Two plusor die coke and I don't know three cans a day. Allison has a fact check. She says, "I am also a huge fan of gardenersworld. I'm from the UK, but I live abroad in a hot dry city, unnamed. So for me, it brings great joy to see my home country and how green it is. Just wanted to fact check your, it's been running for 25 years," quote, comments about the show. As she says, the show started in the 60s and has had over 55 seasons so far. That is impressive. Well, yeah, yes, I knew it had been long, long, long, long for a very long time. Well, we also got a note from Adam who says, "Febie, you mentioned that your wish was to fly over your house and tip your wings. I wanted to suggest that you book a discovery flight with an nearby flight school. You'll be shown the basics of flight controls and will actually fly the plane." If you live close enough to the home airport, you might be able to arrange with the flight instructor to fly over your house. I think that's a great idea and you should bring a recorder. Bring us with you. Okay, on the ground. I, after my recent video interview two days ago with someone who flies their own helicopters, I have just, I'm right there. I need nothing else to get me to get in that plane and start taking lessons. I am pretty close to a very good flight school, so there's no excuse. That is what I did for my birthday last year. I took the biplane ride over the house, but I wasn't flying. Lauren, are you ready to find out the answer to the trivia question? Yes. I'm south Dakota in 80 miles an hour. Yes. You're wrong on both. The state is Texas. Oh. The highest-posted speed limit in the United States is a stretch, if I believe Route 130. Could be one, let me actually tell you, 130. It's a 40 mile section of the Texas State Highway 130 toll road, also known as the Pickle Parkway between San Antonio and Austin, and the highest-posted speed limit is 85 miles per hour. Wow. Regularly have I ever gone 85 miles an hour. I can't, I can't imagine. And then you go five over, you're going 90? Would you like to talk about things you've been enjoying lately? Yes. I would. Well, I think one of the things that you've been enjoying, and I've been enjoying, we actually, I don't know if this has ever happened before. I think we have a crossover. This is also, this is going to be a reveal into our lives. What part of it? What do you mean? A reveal into, but tell me what I'm just wondering what the reveal is going to be. I just think this is, this is personal. That we'd be interested in this? Yes. Well, we bought the founding membership for a month. So I don't know if we're going to be interested in next month. There was a miss, Phoebe, and I had a misunderstanding about this also. I said I bought, I became a founding member, which she somehow thought meant that I was like an investor in a new local yoga studio, but it's not just yoga, it is hot yoga. It's hot. We are both going and we are, we are trying so hard in there. Here's what happened. Lauren said, there's this new yoga place, it's just opened and downtown Durham. It's, well, we know why you're going back because the smoothie bar, which are pretty good. She said, it's great. So then the best thing about it is that you can order your smoothie before class, and when you walk out of class, it's lined up for you with your name on it. No waiting. She went, would you come with me? And I said, Lauren, I can barely do yoga, and I certainly have never done a whole thing. First, I misunderstood and thought I could bring you for free because of my founding membership, which was incorrect. So I went to an hour long hot yoga class, I had not gone to yoga class in about eight years or real life yoga class. I do little yoga, peloton stuff, and I didn't know what to expect. I go in there, I grab a little towel. We open the door, it is just an furnace, it's 170 degrees. Lauren and I put our little mat side by side, and we start going, the sweat is pouring off of me. I look over at Phoebe's mat, it is like eight. The dog got out of the elake and shook off. Your mat was, and I said, you were sweating more than me because you have such high levels of cardio fitness. I was sliding, my feet were sliding. I didn't know it. She was also glaring at me the entire time. You're so hot, you can't do anything. You don't understand the poses, warrior one, two front lunge, crescent moon of sivasana. The music is very loud, I couldn't hear, I was so hot, I could not hear the words. She's trying to follow along with her. So we go to the first, we get out of it. And then the most wonderful thing in the world is at the end of it. They come by with a cold lavender towel and it feels Like heroin. I don't know. I must this must be what heroin feels like. It's fantastic. Anyway, so that's that's my number. Can we say it's your number one two Lord? Yeah, absolutely. I've really been enjoying it. It feels so good to walk out of there and have your smoothie and then I don't know. I don't know why it's so fun. It's so hard though in the middle of it. It's just it's so hard, man. Gosh. But you know what? I got one of those towels. So I put the towel on top of the mat now helps with this wet. What's your number two Lauren? My number two is the movie called Black Bag. Is this one of these corporate thrillers? No, but it's Kate Blanchett. Do you pronounce it Blanchett or Blanchett? I pronounce it Blanchett. Oh. Black Bag. This is a spy movie directed by Steven Soderberg. And it has Kate Blanchett and Michael Fassbender. They are both intelligence officers married. And that's all I'm going to say. I thought it was wonderful. Okay. The second thing I've been enjoying lately on my new makeup journey. Hot yoga makeup. Who are you? Is Jackie's Jiko here at Criminal Recommended this product? And then my niece said you have to have it. It's not fancy. This is my clear water. Oh, yeah. My cellular water. No, don't. I'm not sure. This is makeup remover. And it does a fantastic job. And I do those Neutrogena wipes and things. This is the stuff. It's not expensive. You, you know, squirt it on a little piece of cotton. And it takes out all of your makeup. So that is my number two. My technique for removing mascara is you just wait. That's my technique, too. But you know what happens when you wake up in the morning? Yeah. It's fine. You just move forward. You just take the toilet paper. You look like you underneath your eyes. And then, yeah. Just rough scraping, just like the makeup application. As I said, just use your hands. So that, yes, that's my number two. What's your number three or my number three is a chain male cast iron pan scrubber. Do you own this? I do. Wow. I've been making scrambled eggs every morning in a cast iron. And it is not fun to clean unless you have one of these little chain male scrubbers. Yeah, that's a great question. It's a simple, beautiful device. And then if you feel like it's getting kind of dirty, you just put in the dishwasher. Yeah, it's great. If people knew how much stuff I put in the dishwasher. Listen, I would love to give a tutorial on how to care for a cast iron pan. That would be fun. I have cast my father used the cast iron pan that was his mother's. That he used, she used when they were growing up. And if you saw it, it looks exactly the same. Is it like shiny? Yes, perfect. It's beautiful. That's really cool. You never put soap. I have a friend who only, who doesn't ever wet their cast iron, they only use a very, very coarse salt and a ton of scrubbing. Yeah, you have to have water. You do, you know, this idea that if it's better, you should season it every once in a while too. And when you say that, you mean olive oil and in the oven? Yeah, very hot. The number three thing that I've been enjoying lately is, I think I do enjoy it. I think I'm going to say I'm enjoying it. Is the new season or the new, I don't think it's season of the show Beef? I can't wait to start it. It's very dark, but there are these tiny little gestures and words that are so funny, so quietly weird and funny that I, I recommend it. I have watched two episodes, but I'm enjoying it. I think Carrie Molligan is just. She's great in this. Yeah. She's great. Oh, you had us a review of Marty Supreme. Yeah. I was flying back from Boston yesterday and Marty Supreme, when I tried to watch it before, it was $20 to rent on Amazon or something. So I've never seen it. I didn't see it for the Oscars. But it was free on Delta. I didn't like it. I couldn't, I felt like I was on a moving train and I couldn't get off. And, you know, it was witty, of course, and moved so quick. And maybe if you were in it, but I just, it was, I needed something slower and quieter. I walked out of Uncut Gems for a similar reason. I just was like, I needed to stop. Yeah, that's not a joy in it. I want to get off. Yeah, yeah. That's how I felt about Marty Supreme. And I'd even finished it. I have 43 minutes left. Plane landed. I don't know if I'll go back. I watched the movie of Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy with Colin Firth. Pretty slow start, but then I very much enjoyed it. Um, well Lauren, I have to go because I am. I'm gonna start tracking an episode of Love right now. Great, talk to you next time. Bye-bye.