Bob the Drag Queen Heralds the Birth of Katya's Pussycat with Katya

We're back mom, but we're back. We are um, uh, I can't wait to get into so many things to do another break. What's up with her? No, she's getting her hair plugs in her tummy tuck. Hey, she really all inclusive. I'm gonna get a hair plug to 45 hundred all inclusive. She's gonna turkey. They put you up at a three star hotel for six weeks And they do the plugs. They do the tummy tuck. They do they if you can feminize your feet if you want like Monet, yeah, I don't know They can take pictures. When does the feminization kick in? Thank you. Hello. Keep him keep him fired. Can you feminize a size 15 foot hobbling? Uh, bunion. You chop the toes off. Well, Mary, I got two words for you corn blade. What's the corn blade? Let me tell you Do you have horns? No, not anymore. Not this corn blade Mary. I've got I was like, I've been dreaming about foot raps Yeah, a foot rasp. It's like a cheese grater for your feet. Yeah, yeah, I've had these. Yeah, and they're quite intense. They can be quite intense. You know, you You're like, oh my god. I have two inches of dead skin on my feet. Now I'm a size two. Mm-hmm. Like so I got a corn blade though. And that shit is a fucking razor Do you have got to watch out? Do you have a nice feed? Um, I'll let you be the judge of that Everything I said in mine, but that's that's not a, um, it's not a foot model foot. Have a good nice foot in mine is not an accomplishment. What is a girl? I it's like you're a socks. That's crazy. No, this is a this is a once. I never do this. Are you throwing these shoes away after? I never do this because girl these these will be a biohazard these shoes. Yeah, you can't wear There there comes an age and I would say 13 where you can no longer wear a shoe without a sock. What about loafers at the on the cape? Like a low, no, not a loafer. No, you can't wear any shoe that encapsulates your foot. It has to be a sandal. Otherwise, the shoe is just it's the nasty issue on the plan of the shoe becomes Loafers on the cape on the cape. Loafers on the cape. What is this cape card, bitch? Oh, I've been stuck in Martha's Vineyard. Do I look like I go to Martha's Vineyard? They got black people up in there. Not the Obama's not the Obama's are up a different ilk than I am. I'll just say that they're not as classy clearly. Look at these brains. We got our units on. Excuse me. You posted a lot of us a unit. What are you talking about unit? The unity of the beautiful. It's no longer the ball. It's just what is it? It's just beautiful. Unity unity. There it is. You and I T Y. Before we get into Simone Biles and math, what has been going on in your life? Other than this gorgeous, lovely printed book for which she has received so much critical acclaim. Thank you. Tell me about the process. Can I say what has been the most like impressing about this book for me? First of all, getting it written was a very long process. It took me four years to write the book. Talk about writing a book because, Mama, talk about it. So I missed the fiction. I missed every deadline. Except the last one. Obviously. But see, that's editors. They must know. Of course they know. I started writing. Thank you. And then we had a lockdown. I started writing this on the episode one. I got the deal on season one episode one filming of We're Here. And then after that. When I started writing this book, Trump was president. And when the book was released, who's president again? Trump. Biden. Trump. That's 17 years. Oh, we don't know. That's four. Yeah, four. That's what I mean. Four. Four. That's not how you do math. Four. But you know, feels I don't do the Eurocentric math. Thank you. I do. I do. I do. I do a different kind of math that we study here in the States. Black Jabra. Exactly. Yeah. No, but it took me four years to finish the book. Five years if you include the audiobook. Did you like doing the audiobook? I I'm glad that I did it. Have you ever done audiobook before? I have. Reading an audiobook is not like reading a book. No, it's if you if you sit in your home and you read a book, you think you like that. I basically did an audiobook. It is not. You have to get a word. You can't study. You can't gibber. And there's someone there being like you said. And instead of a you said the instead of the you said go to the store instead of go to store. You know, like in every and there's like, do you want? Did you want it to be like that? Did you want to mispronounce that word? I have never met a person who was so attentive and so vigilant. Yes. Literally, like, she would stop me every fucking 10 seconds because I it was so diabolical. I felt like I was illiterate. I felt like I had no that comes a point where you're like, M like you're reading, but you don't even register that you're reading anymore because you've been reading for so long. What I'm going to say was the most important part of this book is that my publisher has told me that we are on our eighth reprint. Which is he was saying most books don't even mo 90s. You had 10 at the time, right? No, no, just the eighth book, the eighth books, I didn't know. Most books most books don't even get one reprint 90% of books don't even get one reprint. I am on my eighth reprint of this book. Congrats. A fucking latience. Thank you. Sometimes bestseller novel. Mama. Non fiction. Non fiction. Do you know words? I was going to say, I was thinking like, wait, would you? Was I what? I was trying to make a really bad joke about Indian fiction. Let's not. Fiction. Now listen, the fiction. Yeah, I really, I definitely decided to take a crazy route in writing this book for sure. I really have to thank you because we do not need another drag. That's what I said. I was offered a drag one more. Of course. And I was like, I don't want to write about my life. I think you guys think it's more interesting than it really is. They're like, you know, you have to be living that crap. I'm like, I go home. I play video games. I come back to work. And I, everything else I'm doing, you're seeing it. Hello, you're seeing all of it. I'm on the podcast. I do fucking three podcasts a week. You already know what I'm doing. I wish I had to like literally go out and make new stories. I also think that my more interesting stuff is ahead of me. You're in your 40s. How do you? 43. 43. I'm 39. I'll be 40 next year. You know what's kind of crazy. I think around 43 to 50. You can actually, I would say around 38. You can officially say, I have more days behind me than I have ahead of me. Isn't that kind of crazy? Not necessarily true. But how do you want to be? That is a great. Now that's a great question. I have my, I had a great dance teacher in school who was a very wise, incredible woman. And she, I'll never forget, I always keep this in my back of my mind. She says her 40s were her 40s and most of her 50s were fucking stellar. Yeah. Because she was, it was like the intersection of a maturity, a wisdom, the body was still very capable. But it was there was a like you weren't boiling it around like, you know, you were taking care of it. You see stuff used to do on stage and then think yourself, how? Like there's like, I, like, there's this drag queen back in the day. She was sent out of New York City because she tried to stab her boyfriend allegedly. So she's like, we're not in the city. Like she got arrested and then she got out of jail and then she like fled to go to Florida. That's where you go. When you're stabbing you go down there. She's probably in her 40s now. She's probably my age or a little bit older. Maybe I do not know why she tried to stab her partner. Why did you say that? Why did you bring that up? I don't know. Oh, this is the thing where she would jump in the air. Oh yeah, her Kuderslam wasn't her, her equivalent to Kuderslam was jumping in the air as high as she could and then landing on her knees. Like, mama, no. Oh, baby. When I see it, it's like, so I, I know about dance and actual dance before I learned about drag. And this death drop move is nobody should ever have been, this shouldn't not be a move. And doing it on your knees is even worse. I feel I jumped in the air with our knees. I would explode. We do not fuck with our knees. Your knees are a huge joint. And anybody who has had a fucking knee replacement will tell you it is a fate worse than death. Can we get to Sherry Vine here talking about how I or no, Sherry Vine was saying she had a knee replacement and then Jackie be at a hip replacement. So she was like, well, my friend had a hip replacement. It's the same thing that I was like, no, it's not. Maybe no aside. He was like, it's nothing like it. Hip replacement is a sprained finger. A knee replacement is like head shopped off. Yeah, he was like, he was like, you will not recover the way your friend recovered. It is not the same thing. You will not be having the same experience. I assure you, it is not like a hip replacement. And she was like, I always forget I had a hip replacement. Always. I forgot you had a hip replacement. You're joking because I mentioned it all the time. I really forgot. What? Me too. I really forgot. Because it's my knees, country. Which hip? I don't know. Your guess is another one. You woke up there. I was gonna pick one. Well, you know what? The one about the hip still hurts, but we picked the other one. You know what happened? I was in Singapore. I was, uh, did not, you know, I didn't warm up at all. At the end of the show, I did the very thing. I jumped up, landed in a split. Didn't that didn't stop there. I didn't think when I bounced, bounced, bounced, and I bounced in a, in a circle like to do like the clock. And then I dragged my pussy to that stage and drag it back here. The first bounce. Like a Roomba. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Swiffer, swiffer, swiffer. And then I, the first landing, I heard a something untoward. Click, click. Yeah. I was like, ooh, that sounds like a muscular tear. Let me keep. I had to take, I had to get a wheelchair the next day of the airport. The one time I did a split back when I could do a split, you know, do you still do those? Uh, I'm trying to do straddle splits now. Okay, some people never learn. I was, so now I'm just slamming it like just bam, bam. No, I don't want to do it on stage. It's just for my like personal enjoyment. Got it. It's the only goal I have in my life. Right now is to get to a shadow split only goal back when I could do a split I remember I was I was at the club out of drag I was maybe 23 24 Dancing and then and then this guy came up to start dancing like against me like I was like Oh, we're having a little dance off. This is this could be cute and fun He's doing his moves and then I was eating him up and then he pulled out a fan This is before everyone's clacking the fans and he was clacking and everyone's going crazy He flipped it. He caught it and I was like I have to one up him So baby I went up. I jumped up. I spread those legs in the air. I land it I say I hit that split and as soon as I got down there I was like something has happened something has happened and then I could not get up But I couldn't stop dancing so I started doing floor work I hit the floor I move and then I and then as the crowd was going crazy I took his fan. I clacked it and then I crawled to the bathroom close the I literally crawled To the bathroom close the door behind me Rang my friends that girl come in here and get me I I literally can't stand up I have to buy it in I see hot and a wheelchair. I have to get out of here So I he he my friend and Frosty Flakes shots Frosty Flakes greater diversion. I crawled to the bathroom I crawled from the bathroom to the taxi yellow Texas pre-Uber Got a McTaxi crawled into the car took me up town crawled into my apartment up for five floors Literally no elevators and it was no way it was literally I had to crawl up with my it was it was insane It's horrible but all because this this guy brought out a fan See when you dance battles nothing ever good happens. You're gonna do your style. You're gonna dance She really thought she was eating everything up That movie was so insane. Yeah save the last dance. Yeah, yeah, save the last dance. That was a great And I guess we're we to believe like this bitch is eating. I think it was very it was very like 2.0 of like a teen wedge like top that. Yeah, it was very that kind of level of cringe at the time I thought they were being fierce. It's tricky. Open about the surgery. Are you breaking the news? The plugs or the tummy tuck? She don't want me to time she does not want me to talk about the tummy tuck, but the plug she's fine with I don't know where they're gonna get these plugs. She's bald as hell Wait, she really gonna tell me she's trying to get it. No, no, no, she's trying to get the I mean I'd I have Very very suspicious about the plugs. The tummy tuck. I'm getting the plugs in really. Yeah And Monet got a tummy tuck actually. She opened up about I can now say it Monet got a tummy tuck on when she went and got her lipo every single person on this earth Who has ever had any affiliation whatsoever with drag race has had the turkey treatment I'm going to Beverly Hills Miss fame went to New York. Yeah, I mean in jinx went to Seattle. Oh, Jesus. They'd these shmere homies over your head They just put like and white people do a drum circle And they pray though which is pray that your hair grows and it works and that's the problem Just hemp dread exactly exactly No, I it's funny because I Well, I never had good hair to begin with So I've never even fantasized whatsoever or been even a little bit jealous or like or or or you're earning for that kind of Because I don't want the hair that I had when I was young. I used to have beautiful long hair. Really? Like a box down no like like like uh Like um, I mean rest in peace. Malcolm. Johan Warner or like I had long locks like down in here beautiful like Yeah, he had locks in like the early thousands. Yeah, he just passed away. We were so crazy. Really? Yeah, he I think he drowned You're flexible. Yeah, damn. I think he drowned Yeah, and the came in islands Oh god, yeah, I just saw I just saw a tic talk about um getting caught in a in a sink Not as like the holes they put in the middle of you know, they put these holes and lakes to keep them overflowing You know about this they will install a hole in a lake to keep it from overflowing the water shoots down and it goes out somewhere else And then this one was like I want to go see the hole girl's last things you ever saw you don't do that shit You don't fuck with mist water. I don't I do not get in the ocean you will never catch me the only thing I will get into the ocean if it's like Ginger Rogers Beach everybody's gay, you know what I mean It's just like you dip your toes that freezing ass cold water or you're in Thailand and you just go up to your You know, it's like warm whatever I don't fuck with lakes that scummy nasty bullshit. I get no like I sometimes I don't even get pools because I'm afraid of sharks Do you um do you When you're out in these Streets on these gigs and stuff do you like hang out with the people and go to their stuff like you got to come to this diner You got to come to this lake you got to come to this thing the girls do it. They're like I'm like like the local girls Be like let's all go to the the knick-knack patty-weck sinkhole girl. No Do you do the new beaches we ever done a new beach? I you know I I have so okay. This is interesting You didn't have a brief exorcism and no, I just I have some gas I'm a gas from time to time. I've recently made my good friend watch ghost for the first time for the first time. We never seen ghost Motherfucker What's a great movie ghost? We'll be Goldberg and ghost. Yeah, you love it, right? You know, I hate I'm a I Yeah, and she is I've never I've never seen I've never there's never been a best support in the world Actress actress Oscar more deservedly one than that. I mean she didn't want for color purple. That's it Okay, but she vindicated because this full she was Borillian she was amazing I mean, how'd you like it? What baby? What'd you do to your head? It's all yeah, I mean she's every every line. Yeah, so good. Yeah. Okay anyways Uh, I have that I have that outfit The one going to not the one but I have a recreation of the outfit from the bank. I literally have it. You walked like that I know you don't give I know you don't think I'm giving this check to a bunch If you really analyze I've been I've been thinking they fucking used and abused that poor black woman And what was her fucking reward? Nada she got to see it better twice. He go to the to the to the to the to the to the to the to the she was raped She yeah, she was oh that part. Yeah, she was she it was consensual But she they used literally use the body did she know what she was concerned? Was she like I'm gonna let you hang out demy more or she like I'm gonna I'm gonna let you top demy more she said you can use me go ahead and do it So we was can say it wasn't great. It wasn't full great. I'm gonna have a polyamorous But it was little and figurative use it. She was used up and spat out and almost killed But then if if the whoopie Goldberg cinematic universe is continuous Then it was redeemed when she became a biggest headliner And then she later when she later went to space I know but the but the whoopie Goldberg cinematic universe if they're all tied If what be is the same person in every movie Once she is a scam artist Psychic then she left it behind to go be To work in Vegas And then she became a nun and then she went to space and then she became she was in Star Trek And then she became a hyena she She died and came back as a hyena But you have to do a lot of work to make it you know she was in Lion King. I've never seen it. Whoa I know I know what what kind of millennial are you the one that done watch cartoons? You're also JNX verging though No, I'm a millennial for sure, but you're um you're you're um because I think 45 is the cutoff You're 82 82 yeah 82 and I think 81 might be With a JNX start. I don't think so. Look it up control room 80 80 Yeah, I mean, I don't think that has anything to do with me not watching cartoons But you don't you don't you watch like other ones like Little Mermaid Well, I mean, I've like seen them when I was a child. Yeah. Yes, but Lion King was not Didn't come out when I was a child it came out in 1994. Oh, it did. Yes. The one with Beyonce. No Just kidding. Oh my god. I'm sweating. I'm sweating in here. Willy Lopez. So in 94 you were 10 I was 12 12 years old. Yeah, girl. Let me tell you what I was doing in 90 fucking four. I really want to sit in the dark drinking blood You think I was watching the Lion fucking King. Where were you drinking blood because I was got bitch Territory like thoroughly got who's blood my blood and my friends. Oh We were in the dark the more I learned about you to be bisexual. I learned such interesting things about you that are so Your child was your was it a dark childhood? I just told you literally In the dark wasn't dark because you were like knowing gets me with my life is my family life is great I was I was legitimately depressed. I was also More than that. I was also very interested in like, you know, I was Bear I was got I like did you did you do we had we had one we had like maybe three white kids in my school and one of them He actually one of them ended up working in a bar with me in New York City. Oh, I was like oh my god Do into Mara high school. That's crazy. One of Mara high school Mara like tomorrow Mara has been extra camel middle school and Newport University She shut down too much aluminum But this one guy he used to spike his hair with black nail polish that so that he only have to do his hair once a month We'll go that's disgusting, but I would I never forget I wore fish nets to wood shop once I'll never in that one - It was just a little humiliating, a little humiliating. - Have you ever been to a Himalayan King? - No, I'm the opposite. - You want a Himalayan. - No, I want everybody to feel great and proud and wonderful about themselves. - I love that. - Well, you know, I got a ride home with this guy who had the teeny tiny little micro penis and I know that he wanted me to do that. I would not oblige. - Oh, he wanted you to shame his penis. - Oh, of course he did. - But it would have made him feel good to make him feel bad. - But I don't, but that doesn't make me feel good. It's a two way street. - And I'm not going to jerk him off like this like he's a fucking Lego. - So what did you do? - I looked at it and I was like, and he was like, and you drove me home. - But how does that make him feel good? I think you gave him the King Shame he wanted. - I mean, I do. - I wasn't like loony tunes like that. I was like, - Yeah, that's it. - Wow! - Yeah. - And then I could just project out of vomit at the entire way home. - No. - I looked at it with a few men with micro penis. - No, I've never been a size queen though. - Girl, you would be hung like an elevator button. It's all about what's in the back for me. - Oh, nice. I don't know your ass woman. - Oh, baby. - Mama. - Baby. - Mama. - What's your IG, what's your IG? - Mama. - Baby. - For your page. - Baby. - Mama, let me show you this. - I want to see because I love-- - This is, do you know that the amount of times I have jerked off to this fucking clip. You have no fucking idea. - This is just tricky lip-syncing on drivers. - Shut that fuck up. - Mary, watch, catch this. - Oh, that's a wagon. - It's a deep freezer hanging out of a minivan. - Yeah, this man is dragging a wagon for sure. - Mama. - The way that I would clap those cheeks, like it was the fucking, I mean, it just. - So what makes it nice, but what makes it but where you're like, that's the one. - Oh, hairless. Oh, actually, that's not true 'cause I did have sex with a hooker recently and he had a big hairy butt, which I don't prefer only just because I don't like, I'm like Harry. I would, like, my dream butt is smooth. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But he was extraordinarily well groomed in terms of hygiene. He had cleaned out like it was his last night on earth. And so I-- - It might have been, have you called him back? (laughing) - Well, I was rather from a sense of-- - He did. - No, I ate his ass like it was my last meal on death row. And like, it was lovely. But my dream ass is like tan, huge, smooth, and like, you know, like that, just my most best. - I've been appreciating for a lot of different butts, right? I like a wagon, like a big, like sticking out the back of yo, like a shelf, put a cup on it. - Like just unbelievable. - Yeah, like breakfast trays. - Yeah, the airline charges you extra for carry on. - It's the cart. - I love that as well. But then also a little butt, like if it's like a little butt, I like a little butt, I'm not into like a concave booty. - No, no, no, no, no. Extended back, we don't know. - No, I'm not into that. But like a little butt, like a little cupage with a baby shelf on the bottom. I like a shelf on the top, but if there's a little baby shelf on the bottom, I'm also happy with that as well. If you do have a flat ass, I prefer you have like lady-like hips. - Sure. - So then it looks like it's given the ass more shape than it is. But I'll say if the ass is completely flat, and once they're like all the way bent over, it kind of all just blends in the one thing. - Well, they gotta get on top. - Yeah, yeah, for sure. - They gotta get on top. I can't hit it from the back. Like it's Mr. Bojangles with skeleton or whatever. But I actually, it's funny you mentioned that 'cause I don't go for skinny skinny guys, but I did have a fuck buddy for a while who was very, very thin. But he had, he had some-- - Some dumpish. - Yeah, he had some major dumpish. Like you could really like get two handfuls, which was like, oh, that's lovely. And it was very, it was genetic, you know? - It sounds like your hands. - Pretty average size hands, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - But they were like, it was, he had like-- - Are you sure you're not sure. - I'm five, nine, eight, or five, 10? - That's average. - Yeah, average. And that he, but he was like six to skinniest fuck. And but he had a little, I was like, oh, lovely. So I had like-- - I feel like you have good, your body is very resilient. - Are you kidding me? - I mean-- - I'm the shit that I put it through. - I've been with me for 20 years now. - Aren't these like notoriously your real teeth? - Yes, yeah, yeah, that's crazy. - I know, and it's funny. I have the teeth anxiety. So in, I told this story before, but in Boston, I, at the height of, I mean, I was very like everyday meth user, like very, very, very intense. Seven years could not go to the dentist. And when I got sober, I was like, I have to go to the dentist. And I was like, they're gonna take out all my teeth. They're gonna take out all my teeth. Not one cavity. - They're like gang, gang. - They were like, these are beautiful. They just need to floss more. - But we're gonna recommend you a program to other people, actually. - I was like, they were like, keep doing meth. - No, I'm just kidding. - I got to think that when I first got sober, I talked to my sponsor, and I was like, this applies to you. And it is a compliment, by the way. But I was like, I remember talking to him, I was like, you're a little nutty. And then he looked at me, he said, well, I smoked crack every 10 years. - Girl. - He's like, so you're gonna lose something you just can't get back. (laughing) - I mean, I always think, you know, it's funny, whenever I go to a meeting, it's like, I always have to remind myself, if it's boring, or if it's a little, if it's not, you know, not dazzlingly entertaining, I'm like, what's the fuck, a miracle? All these crackheads didn't erupt into some kind of, like, ballroom blitz type of, like, rumble, kind of. You know what I mean, that it actually-- - Well, you never heard about the Paris Street meetings. - I know. - New York City has a meeting called Paris Street, where like, the legend is like, you go to Paris, you wanna go, do you wanna throw a chair? That's what they always say. Do you wanna throw a chair? - Yeah, I love that shit. - Or midnight. I think one of the things I saw at midnight was this guy was like, he was basically like this. Is this 30? This guy was like, I, today's my first day back. I woke up in the hospital and my foot was gone. I got drunk and I fell on the subway platform and then the next thing I knew I woke up in the hospital and I had one foot. This is one day back. My name was Saun Saun, I'm an alcoholist. Thank you for letting me talk. And this thing I was like, you know what I think I'm done. I think it's a wrap for me. I don't think I, I don't think I need anymore anymore. He popped that nub up there, bam. In the chair in front of him. On the back of the person sitting, like, like-- - On their shoulder. - No, like, it was on the chair and he popped the nub up and he showed us all that nub. Still bandaged. - Mary, what if he was like so flexible? He was just like-- - What is it like in Mami Dearest where she's in the mirror and she lifts her leg up to her face? - I don't remember. - I don't remember. - I don't love Mami Dearest like some gays do, but that one scene is pretty iconic. Is there a gay movie that you're like, why do you like this movie? - Yes, yes, yes, I mean girls. - Who fucking cares about mean girls? - Mean girls is a crazy take. - What do you mean? Mean girls is a brilliant movie. It's so good. - She's from Africa. - You can't just ask people why they're white. - For me, it is-- - I'm from Africa. - For me, it is Mami Dearest. - She's from Africa. - Well, Shirley's there on Instagram. - She's there on Instagram. - She's from South Africa. - But she was like a missionary or something, wouldn't it? - Charlie? - No, Lindsay Lohan. - Where? - I don't know, somewhere there. - The country of Africa? - You know the hate about Epcot had never been. But when you-- - I mean, neither. - We had Epcot there like, all right, we're in China. We're in Germany. We're in Russia. We're in Africa. - Girl. - We're in the country. We're leaving the country. - Trying to go to the country. - The streets of civilization. - Which is crazy, 'cause Africa, where in Egypt? Where in South Africa? Are we in this air or desert? Are we on the Nile River? - Zimbabwe. - Are we in the forest? - The Congo. - Are we in Kenya? Are we in Lusoto? Are we in-- Where are we? - Yeah. - Pacific Ocean. - In the ocean. - In general, Africa. We're in Lion King. - It's wild. - I think Lion King is in the Serengeti. - I couldn't-- - But you never-- - How would you fucking know? - I don't know. - I couldn't tell you. - 'Cause you were too busy sucking blood from your friends and me. - My sister been in Africa, though, studying primates. - Better believe it. - Jane, Jane Goodall. - Jane Goodall. - She oldest is younger sister. - Wait, I know you don't care. I know nobody cares, but I'm just gonna have to. You have to suffer. - Show me your Jane Goodall sister. - My nephews, they are so-- Look at this fucking, look at that motherfucker. - Are these some of her primates? (laughing) - Yeah, she-- - They were all primates. - They were all primates. - Yeah, they were all primates. They were primates. No, this is a very cute baby. - Oh, it's so cute. - But look, mama. - That's a great show. - That is a mama, get him into pictures. - I should do that. - Get him into commercial. - I low key have baby fever right now, low key. - Low key, I know that. - I was that man in the first, you're gonna get somebody. - Oh, come on. - I think the Cheb of your baby's a fever. - A little kind of baby's not cute. - This is a doll. That's a doll, bitch. - No, that's the baby. - That's a doll. - This baby looks like it should be on bottom, beautiful. - I'm telling you. Well, if the tummy tuck goes south, he's come, you know, we're gonna get it. - Baldness and runs to the family, everybody. - Girl, don't tell, ugh. Also, you know, I, my maternal side, well, first of all, I have 60,000 cousins on my dad's side and none on my mother's side. And my mother's side, my grandfather, my maternal grandfather died very young and terrible health. And I have that whole gig. - Did you hear about the woman, I can't remember what country she was in. - Africa? - I wanna say, I wanna say it was China, but she, maybe it was the, one of the, the guy who the woman married the other person, they had a lot of plastic surgery done, so they looked really beautiful, but they, It's not their, obviously, your plastic surgeon is a care theater DNA, your DNA is gonna stay the same. And then she was like, I had a baby with you and now I'm gonna have an ugly baby, but I thought you were hot, but you're actually ugly. I'm suing you for making me have an ugly baby. And I think she won the case. - Oh, that's not, it's not indicted. Like two hots don't make it hot. - You know, it feels really unfair. When hot people have ugly kids, to the child. - Yeah. - If my parents were smoking hot and I was ugly, I'd be like, this is something here doesn't feel good. - Maybe if they were hot and poor, that's when you really got the bone to pick. Because you're gonna take that little fucking ugly as bitch to the, to the, to the, to the. - And being an ugly kid is probably only bad up until like, maybe like, well, it starts being bad around five years old. 'Cause no one cares about if you're ugly and you're like three or four. Other kids are only registered. You're not pretty. - I know a child, I won't say who. - Probably safe. But in, you know, it's probably a good, a good tactic. - It was a child in the family who was. - In your family. - Who was hit? Who was toe up? Who was toe up? - In your family? They know, they all know who you're talking about. - No, they don't. Because I told you I have 60,000 cousins on that side. - This is true, and a lot of I go. - Mama, this, this child was, it was, it was. - It's crazy. - Because I'm trying not to gender. I'm trying to keep a general, but it was like, it was like, it was like a jump scare. - Jump scare. It was a bird. It was a mama. - It is a baby. - A baby. It was the ugliest baby ever known to me. - How old is this? - Is the child over 10 now? - Yes. - Still hit? - No, no, no, no, no, no. Not on the cover of Sports Illustrated or on Men's Health Magazine. - But not on the cover of Monster's Ink. - Exactly. - Scary mag. - Yeah, yeah. Not in the terrifying with no prosthetics. - I have a cousin that I don't like. And it feels bad because the cousin is my cousin's child, so it's my baby cousin. - Oh girl, who gives a fuck? - But I don't like, I've never liked this cousin. - Who cares about cousin? - But because they're a child, like the, because I don't like, because I never, the, - How old? - They're now an adult. They're now a very young, like a very young adult. I don't want to give the cousin. - Let's say some, I'd like teenage 20, okay. - Yeah. - I'd enough to have a conversation. - Old enough to have a conversation. - Yes. And I, and I feel justified because I still don't like this cousin. Like I still think that they're super fucking annoying. And they never grew out of that thing that they had. And at first I felt bad because I was like, I don't like this sexual. Like, whoa, I hate, I hate this like, and it wasn't like, this is an annoying kid. I was like, I do not like this kid. Like I hope this kid's not there when I get to the thing. I hate this kid. And now I don't like this adult. I do not like this adult. And they're so fucking annoying. And, but I will say now I feel justified because they have grown to an adult that I also don't like. - Right. - But if I did feel bad disliking this child. - I understand that. I mean, like I had, my nephew was like so, and it continues to, my other nephew, my brother's son was like a terror. Now he is one of the cutest, smartest, funniest, like, but he was a terror. Terror, terror, the terror fire. From like the jump, even in the belly, terrifying. But now this kid is like, so, he's just gonna be amazing. You can tell, but it was challenging. Like you go, I go visit and he has, like imagine if I took all the meth in the world, I still wouldn't be able to catch up with him. - We was so energetic. - When you weren't in amateur flabotomists as a child, were you a terror or were you like, lovely? - Uh. - Thank you, I'll be here all day. (laughing) - Where does that fucking word come from? - I don't know. - It's so wild, just say blood draw. - It's very weird. - Okay, I was, apparently I was a very quiet baby, and I was shy, and I was, I would kept to myself. I didn't, I didn't. I mean, apparently I kicked my neighbor, I need my neighbor in the balls 'cause I didn't wanna watch ET, but that was the only thing I ever acted out. - You hate all the classics. - ET Lion King. - I've never seen it, don't wanna, not interested. - Boo. - When I was a kid, apparently I was a monstrous child. My mother famously said, my mother famously said, "If you were my first born child, "your brother would have never been born. "You were that bad over a child." - Fuck. - But then, like-- - What, how, what, like, noisy? - I was, I cried a lot. I used to snatch my mom's earrings out of her ears, and I don't mean like pull them with the back, I mean like through two flaps of skin dangling, you would have survived them. - I had an obsession with flushing things down the toilet. - You said you were the terrifying. - I was the terrifying. I talked nonstop. Every, every one of my progress said, Christopher is a great kid. He just will not stop talking. I had a nickname. The librarians called me the detective. They go, "Oh, here come to the detective." - Ask a question. - Watch out, here come to the detective, y'all. - But somewhere around seventh grade, I became a lovely child. I became exemplary around seventh grade, and then my brother did a little flip-flop. My brother was a quiet kid. He did a flip-flop, started running with the wrong crowd, which my mother could be like, "Just keep getting me something wrong." I said, "Man, he is the wrong crowd." - He is the leader of the crowd. - There's no way every crowd he's in is wrong. Justin is the wrong crowd. - We were all like, my brother, my sister and I were raised to, okay, so we were raised with some very, very core principles that we cleave to, like, nonstop politeness. We, I had friends who would tell their parents to shut the fuck up. That, to me, is unconscionable. - That's what black is. - That's how black kids think white kids would fuck their parents. - Well, Mary, you would get it. Because these two mother fuckers would talk to their parents like they, it was crazy. - It's very Boston now. - I don't know. This was evil. This was something more. This wasn't like, "My, what the fuck you're talking about?" This was like, "You're a stupid fucking bitch." Like, it was that crazy. - But you all know what the rest of the country thinks about Boston, all right? You know how we feel about you all, you know how better than me. - Yeah, it's like, but, but, so, but we were, I was like, troubled in the sense that I was like, spoken behind in seventh grade, I was doing drugs, I was like, misbehaving, but not, but not like hurting anybody. - Except when you were, when you were, - Well, that was, I would say, hurting was just sensation. - Well, you, and you were there were consensually doing this, you all? - Can you talk me through the process? Was it like, slice, suck? - So, well, there was a-- - Oh, you scraped your knee. Can I get it, can I get it? - No, I didn't, I didn't love the taste of it. I was obsessed with vampires. And then, also, I wanted to be like an enrized vampires, like, like, hairless bisexual. But I was in study hall once and I had a straight razor. And actually, I think you can still see, I think you can still see. It was a huge gash. - You did this in class? - What's the hell? - I didn't in class and it was very scary because it was, and I can't see it. - Is it this? - Oh, no, that's it. It must have been here, yeah. - You can see those a little bit. - You were so vascular, Jesus Christ. - Look at that, flabla on my stream. - Yeah. - Hello, thank you. - Love me. - I did like a super deep gash and it was like, I could see the layers of tissue. And that was kind of like, 'cause I loved biology and anatomy and physiology, I got A+s and all those. I loved dissecting shit. That was kind of the, I didn't want to like hurt myself 'cause I was troubled. I just wanted to carve my shit up, chop it up. - That was a little bit of a red flag. - It's a shoe book, yeah. - Yeah, that's a little dexterity. Could you make it a serial killer? - Girl, no, I don't like hurting people. - Not even like, you know, but the people. - It already did, I'll fuck 'em. (laughing) No, I don't like, I hate pain, I hate. The thing that is, the biggest turnoff for me is inflicting pain on someone else. That is just so heartbreaking to me. - That's valid and fair. - Like, I don't-- - So you can't spank? - I can spank, I can spank 'cause, but I mean, girl, my spank is so Mary Poppins, like, come on. - What's not me and my partner were hooking up with someone else, and this person like to be spanked, and I mean, like, brutalized, like, hurt me and hurt me back. - I like spaking and grabbing 'cause I wanted like, it's an appreciation with the ass. - And this person, what they were-- - It's not an punishment. - They were, they still are, South Asians. So they had very, like, dark brown skin. They're like, you need to be able to see it. So you have to work harder because of how dark their skin was. And I was like, you know, giving it and giving it. And they were like, you do it too. And he was not into it. And I'll never get him just being like, girl, that's like me when I tried to slap somebody. - Oh, baby. - You wanna hear a crazy story? - It was so pathetic. - One time there were her some Madonna slapped me. As a bitch. - Oh, shit. - As a bitch. We were doing the thing. It wasn't hard. It was like this. It was like, blah, blah, blah. And we were doing the scene we were arguing in the scene. She was like, ah, like that. And I'm in the face. - Yeah. And I was like, ah, and then she goes, I'm sorry, you can slap me back. And I set up. - And I said. - But that's a set up. - I said, okay. And I said, and she goes, no, slap me. I want you to slap me. Slap me. I slapped you. And that was wrong. So you slapped me. - Kick her in the pussy. - And everyone's watching. And I was like, okay. And then I went. She's like, no, slap me. Slap me. - I don't like this at all. - I want you to slap me. - And then I did it one more time, but a little bit harder. - Do it on my face. - It was like, I did like this. I did like this. - How? - And she was like, no, slap me. - Are you kidding me more than that? - And I was like, I don't want to slap you. - Mama, we're not doing that. - And she was like, whatever. Let's just keep moving. (laughing) Like, she wanted me to slap the shit out of her. - Can I tell you what I was like, so we were doing a choking thing, which I'm so bad at. Can I do it? So imagine like you're, you're on top of me. We're like, And I was like, am I writing you? - Yes. - And then it was like, it was so pathetic. I like, I kind of chickened out. And I was like. (laughing) He was like, no, I'd be like, I'm like. (laughing) Seriously, it almost came to that. I was like, I was like, we're just gonna move on. We're just gonna move on. - That's one time when a guy was writing me and I was like, "Choke me." I like, if you're writing, just reach down, do a little chokey-jokey. - Yeah, yeah. - Got a grip. - He would pull some of your shit. He was like, I was like, "Choke me." - Yeah. - I would rather put the fingers in the mouth or something like that. - I could choke, but that was-- - But this, I can't do this. - Oh yeah, they'll go. - What the fuck is that? - What are we doing? - They want to be doing. - They want to feel exposed. - Yeah, they want to feel exposed. - Fuck is that all about? - They want to feel exposed that they want you to see. - Well, why don't you just put in one of those dental things you can see all the teeth? - I've been with one of those. - All right. - Yeah, I've been with one of those. - You like giving head? - Yeah, you don't, I don't, I really. - You like getting head? - Hey. - You want to eat the ass and then fuck. - That's kind of all I want to eat. - I want to eat the ass so I suck the balls. Maybe I want to, I love kissing. I'll suck a dick for sure, but like, I'm not, I don't think I'm all that great at it. And I don't like, I can't like. (burps) - I love to suck dick. I love to eat pussy. I love to be down there, giving someone head and just like making them happy with my mouth. It really brings me a lot of joy. It really does. - I can't believe I have not fucked a pussy. I just wish I had a pussy. Oh my God, if I had a pussy, y'all would not send a chance. If I had a pussy, none of you would be here. You would have all quit. You would have all retired. - Everyone always says that if I had a pussy, but like, there are people with pussies who, and we all are still around. - They're not me. (laughs) - You know that gift of the girl with their, I legs out the window with the moving car, squirtin', baby, it would be water rollin', Kevin Costner. - I feel like, I was like, if I had a pussy, if I had a pussy, honey, but like. - You better thank your lucky size. Every day when you get on your knees, you better say thank God that she don't have a pussy, 'cause it would be a wrap. (laughs) Simone Biles would be able to do gymnastics, girl. Nobody would be at the Olympics, not with this fucking puss. (laughs) - What? - Air traffic control has been shut down to why? Because Katia has a pussy. - Chicago, oh hair, gone. JFK, no longer a surface. - That should be so long, 'cause Katia has a pussy. - No, what gives you full body chills these days? - Full body chills. - Not sexual, just intellectuals. - I caught on to a full body chills, man. I don't watch a ton of ballroom beautiful, but I'm willing to catch on to the, to the tricksy Katia's. - It's not a thing, this is not our thing. - But y'all have adopted it. It's kind of like, you all adopt things. - It's a very new thing though. - The idea they become tricksy Katia's, yeah. For me, a full body chill these days, baby. Baby. Baby. - Slap me. (laughs) - I went to the mother fucking, the Hollywood bowl, and I saw Cynthia Reeveau, I read the review, she was, I heard that she fucking shut that shit down. - Adam Lambert screaming at each other for hours, yes. - She's incredible. - Let me tell you all right now. - First of all, Cynthia was amazing. When I tell you, Cynthia was amazing, it was amazing. - Time for a ballroom beautiful. - No one's talking about Raul and Sparta. - The review did very much so. - When I tell you, he was the best part of that show. - Cynthia retired. - So she was great. - She was great. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - No one is talking about Raul at Sparta. - No, they didn't the review. - Good. - They really gave him his flowers. - He was brilliant. - I was, he punched his pilot. - Full body, yes, punch, full body, literal full body. - Yeah, yeah. - And your is up. - I got full body chills from, from Cynthia. I was expecting that. - Yeah, yeah. - I was expecting that. I'm a, I just know there was a role in the Tick Tick Boom album. Way back in the day, the off-roadway Tick Tick Boom. I was like, yeah, we love, we love Raul Sparta. - Is he in the Lion King? - Yes, yes, he was, he was a Sriravi. He played Beyonce's role in the original. - But yeah, he, he was just so, his, and it was. His acting combined with his singing. - Oh, see, that's the, yeah. Incredible. - Incredible. - Incredible. - Beautiful, Raul. - Raul, you better do that thing. You better, you better thank your lucky stars. I don't have a pussy. (laughing) 'Cause you would not have the range, honey, you would not have the range. So I got to the Hollywood Bowl and I sit next to this lady who-- - Wait, so first of all, hold on, let me leave it over here. Are you in those tiny little fucking folding chairs in those cement blocks? - I'm in the folding chairs. - But there is about a half inch between each person, claustrophobia. - Surrounded by snacks, my snacks. (laughing) - And then the guy behind me has the moves on to pick up my entire kitchen with me. - Girl, it's, smushed my chair up. - It's a stress factor. - Also, it's a stress factor. - How, how should I feel about this? Because the part of me that love to say no to people was like, the guy I show up, he's sitting in my seat. - Oh, baby. - So there's six of them, there's six in this little box. He's in the back of corner where the particular eye purchase, his seat was front and center. It is a better seat, but the part of me is like, but who gives you the authority to take my seat 'cause you wanna sit next to your friends? The part of me was like, you need to move, but also I had a better seat so I let it go. Surrounded by my snacks, this lady next to me, she is a sweet lady and I was like, she was like, oh, she's sparking the conversation. So I was like, hey, say, do you love, I see I'm a big fan of Jesus Christ, but I know every work to this show. I love this show since I was in high school. I'm obsessed with this show. And she was like, I am a big fan of Ronald Sparrow. So I said, oh, great, that's really cool. And then out of nowhere, she just goes, she just told me this Randall, she was like, my husband's gay. But she had like, tears in her eyes. And I was like, and then she was like, I've never told anyone that. I've never, I told her about we're here. And then she was like, I've never told anyone I just told you before. I don't know what it is. I just trust you to tell you this. And then her and I have this like really moving conversation about how she was, she was she had a hearing aid in. She was, I just recently, I'm finally in a point in my life where I can afford to go travel and see things. And I have a few years until I can't hear anything anymore. So I'm going to see every play, concert, every show, I'm going to hear everything. I'm so glad cocktail is having pussy. Because I was just about to say, girl, she would be like, no, Helen Keller. And then, so we have this crazy conversation about her and her and I was like, having this great, and then a seat. Oh, right now you're not a Broadway girls. This may, this name might mean nothing to you. I know a little bit. Marissa Jeriot-Winoker was sitting in the booth next to us. She is the original Tracy Turin, but I have from hairspray. Oh, oh, oh, woke up today. Not Nikki Blonsky. No, no, no, no. The original. This is Nikki Blonsky. Well, the original is Ricky Lake. The original Broadway. Yes, Nikki Blonsky is sitting in the bucket booth next to me. I go, wait, both of us? No, just, no, no, no, I said Nikki Blonsky, sorry. Marissa Jeriot-Winoker. Marissa Jeriot-Winoker is sitting in the booth next to me. And then, I had Ricky Lake and Nikki Blonsky, yes. And Judge, her vote was there, wigged. The guy who was there, no, go ahead. So, Marissa probably does not want to tell the story. Then, don't tell it. Don't air her laundry out, which she said, I wish caught you. Didn't have a seat. What happened? Well, Marissa Jeriot-Winoker, I was like, do you know the direct Queen Page Turner? And she goes, I don't have Page Turner. Yeah, I'm a big fan of Page Turner. And she described her perfectly. I used to go to her show. Don't have a new experience. I was like, yeah, yeah. I was like, she used to be a roommate. And she was like, what? And she's like, Page Turner used to be my roommate. I said, Page turns to be a roommate. And she goes, wait, I don't, I don't remember a Page Turner roommate. She's like, what was her, what was her, her, her real name? And I looked it up and I go, oh, her name is Dan. And she was like, so Marissa Jeriot-Winoker had this roommate named Dan, who they stopped being roommates. And they're like, the next year, he started doing drag. She became obsessed with this drag. We went to all of his shows and literally had no clue that it was her roommate. Get the fuck out of him for years. Come on. And had no clue that they were the same. And she was like, I guess Dan just floated off the face of the earth. A real life tootsie, Mrs. Delphire said no clue. That is crazy. She have cataracts. Go on, go on. No, she by the way, looks great. Marissa Jeriot-Winoker looks fantastic. More or less for Marissa. Yeah, for sure. But that is so funny. That is crazy. Had no clue that they, like, imagine if someone was like, imagine an old friend of yours, takes you, I was like, have you heard this right? We named Kanye. I'm obsessed with her. That would be strange. But only though, because you do so much out of drag. But I could, I mean, let's see, I would never, there's so many. Girl, there's so many drag queens I don't recognize on a drag that I've seen on the show. Oh, my favorite mom is when we were in studio. We were in my studio. Hi, how are you? I was like the winner of Drag Race. I was like, no, this is what happened. I said, this is on your nerve. He said, oh, hi. And I said, on your nerve, just one drag race. Like a week before, then Kanye said, you want drag race? Literally, I was like, I just talked to Trixie about this, because she had a similar situation with the queen. She just met, asked her who she was. Girl, it was the you on drag race? No, not like, no, I said, you want, like, it wasn't like not you ugly bitch. It was like, wow, that's a great fact. I said, yesterday I had Irene in my studio and Irene's wearing a dress that cost the value stone. And I had text. I texted the story. Yeah, yeah, yeah. - This is Violet, the picture of the dress that she goes, and how did whoever that is fit into my dress? How did whoever that is? - Mary, listen Violet, you ain't no petite. - Side zero, you got them big ass football shoulders. - And y'all squash the beef yet? - With beef. - Did you even hear the beef they were like, "I ain't no beef." She was like, "Oh, they asked me to have their "assistant reached out." - Girl, that ain't no beef, that's her personality. (laughing) - There it is, yeah, yeah. Like, I mean, please, if she ever returned one of my phone calls, - Did she ever send the voice note? - Did she ever send the voice note? - She sure did. - Oh, yeah. - Salty as butt, God. - Bride constant stay. - That was a brine salty. - I've known her for a year. I've known her before we were both on Drag Race. - Really? - 'Cause we were both from Atlanta. - Oh, right. - Yeah, okay. - Years ago, Violet Chosky, me and her at the fucking the other show. - We would do, Trix and I had been rewatching season seven, and it is truly breathtaking how talented she is. She was a 21. I mean, it was really something. She really fucking, that bitch had a fucking eye. - You know, yeah, 'cause I always think about this, like, you know, in terms of design challenges and stuff, I need a lot of looking at stuff. I, if I'm, if I-- - Do we find those shoes in so we can talk about them? - Sure. - But that's just, that's, girl, that's just gloomy shit on a shoe. - I know, but-- - But there's still a crack in the instruction. Like, I wanna, I'm gonna look at Go T.A.'s runway from like, whatever, whatever. I want references, you know what I mean? I am obsessed with this shoe. - Well, you know what I love, that they're a sling back, and that this, almost at the bottom is, 'cause when you're getting fucked, you got them legs up in the air like a pretzel. - Do you get fucked in heels? - No, but I want to. - You deserve it. - I might have my pussy so tight, it can't get, they're can't get a dick in there. - I believe that, actually. - No, no, it's true. I can't get fucked, girl. It's like-- - Well, I'm bad at it, too. - Well, I mean, I try, it's a long story. We'll talk about it later. - I don't know why we're talking about it. - Are you having a conversation about what Jayden DeRuffer is doing these days? - No, I'm obsessed with RuPaul's Instagram, I'm sorry. - She doesn't know where she comes out, like Mr. Krabs and does a whole Mr. Krabs mix. - So the fuck is Mr. Krabs? - From SpongeBob. - I haven't seen that. - Have you ever seen a cartoon in your life? - Brandon Stimpy. That's what-- - That scans for you. - Brandon Stimpy. - And Rocco's my life. - No. - Really, Rocco's my life was a banger. - He's a Australian, Australian beagle. - He can't do that on television. That's not a cartoon, but it was a kid's show. - Did you ever see, I watched "The Undercats" every day. - Love "The Undercats" before, like, whatever school. And then, we'll jump in the holograms. - I didn't watch that one. - White gay. - Yeah. - They had a black girl, I think. - I wouldn't know. - Would you? - Yeah. - Rhynis Stimpy was fucked. - Did you like camp on a wanna? - I don't know. - I think you would like camp on a wanna. - Is it like Nickelodeon? - Is Nickelodeon, yeah. - Rhynis Stimpy was the Nickelodeon. - Yeah, but that was very like, very off the beaten path. - It was a camp on a wanna. - Rhynis Stimpy was disgusting. - Rhynis Stimpy was vile. - But they had the best-- - They had the rock on my life. - But it was like a little more tame down. - What about their product log? The best advertisement ever. Log rolls downstairs, alone and impairs, rolls over your neighbor's dog. It's fit for a snack. No, it's great for a snack. It fits on your back. It's log, log, log. It's log, it's log. It's big, it's heavy, it's wood. It's log, it's log. It's better than bad, it's good. - That's from Rhynis Stimpy. - That's so great. - That's Rhynis Stimpy. - Yeah, they had a product called Log. It was just a log. - Okay, let's just talk about Jingles. I want to have a conversation about the Toza Russ song. - I don't want to grow up. I'm a Toza Russ kid. - I'm a Toza Russ kid. - They got a billion Toza Russ that I can play with from bikes to planes to video games. It's the biggest Toza Russ kid. There is, she wins. I don't want to grow up, 'cause baby, if I did, I would be a Toza Russ kid, bump, bump. This was a banger of a song. - I don't want to pussy, that's for Katia. 'Cause that, no. - Yeah, no, I was on the east coast of his water country. - When the sun is blazing and the summer gets hot, water country's a very cool spot. There's no better place to feel me. Water country, have some fun. - Bring back the jingle. - Where are they? - The TV shows, we had the TV shows had a batch angle. - We were watching it for the, we were watching, here's it. It whenever happened to predict abilities, the new man, the paper boy, and even the TV. - Fresh Prince? - Oh, and it was Philadelphia. - Yeah, born and raised on the playgrounds, where's the man's most of my days? - Chillin' down, makes him relax and I'm cool, and I'll snap a Chris ride. - How's that? - We had a couple of guys. They were up to no good. - Startin' to make a dribble in the neighborhood. - I got a wild little plant, but my bus kids said, "You move with the oxygen, look for it, look for that." - Where's the little cabin? Where do you keep me? Where's the place, where's the temperature, and that's it in the mirror. - If business ends, that's where the cab is, and that's where the cab is, that's where the cab is. - It's about seven or eight years to the cab. - Oh, see you later, look at him with you. I was by the way there. - The city of my throwin' has a prison bell here. - Oh, the prison bell here. - Good. - But what about the Baton Switcher then, Viv? I did not appreciate that. - That was gaslighting. That was television. - Gaslight. - And no offense to the second, Viv? I just love this. - Oh, originally Viv, did you see, oh my God, did you see the, the reunion where OG and Viv confronted Will Smith about, about how they treated her? Maybe she's hot. She's hot like fish grease. She was like, y'all did me dirty, and we need to talk about it. - What happened? - Y'all replaced me with this light-skinned woman. - Why did they replace her? - Apparently she was difficult, but so, according to her, Will Smith got her fired. - Okay. - According to her, Will Smith said he didn't like work with her. She stood up for himself too much. She had too much of a chat too many opinions. She was an established actor. Will Smith is brand new guy. There's a new hot young guy on the scene, and he was calling all the shots 'cause it was his show. - He was like, or just a rapper at that point, right? - Yeah, he was doing rap, yeah. And then he became, I mean, he was so bad on that show. There were moments where he would like, if you go back and look, you can see clips of him mouthing people's words, as they speak. Like they're talking, they're talking. And he's like, - Oh, fuck. - Probably Cucards too. Probably Cucards. - Fuck. - Like, he was mouthing their words while they're acting. - Damn. - It was insane. It was insane. And they did her real dirty. And I do want to do a quick shout out to the Family Matter theme song too. So good. - Okay, refresh me. ♪ Is a rare condition ♪ No. ♪ In your age ♪ ♪ Did you read any good news or newspaper page ♪ ♪ Love and condition ♪ ♪ Are the grand designs ♪ ♪ Some people say ♪ ♪ Is even harder to find ♪ ♪ Because you got that pussy ♪ ♪ Nobody's doing a chance ♪ ♪ Everybody killed themselves ♪ ♪ The jumped off a bridge ♪ - Subscribe to make your pussy video. But then it'll be AI so I want to make AI video with your pussy bouncing around. Can you describe your pussy to me in the dream scenario? - My pussy is hot, tight, wet, and-- - He grips like pliers on the dead. - Big lips, you have the squiggles. - Whatever you want, they change all the time. - Oh my God, metamorphosis pussy. - Yeah, it's like Mr. Potato Head. - Got it. - Mrs. Potato. - Mrs. Potato. - Yeah, Mrs. Potato pussy. Mrs. Potato pussy. - There it is. - It grips, it's like that lady song. - Tight pussy, right pussy. Fuck me all night, pussy. - Make you leave your wife pussy. 'Cause it's what you like pussy. - Fuck you so good I'm moving in next week. - Next week pussy, yeah. - Well my, my-- - We should say lady, her name is lady. - Lady. - Yeah, the worst name is-- - The worst name you've ever choose as a rapper. - Pretty Google. - Yeah, exactly. But it's like Kaya. It's like, grill, way we know. It's pussy like, pliers on the dick. It grip the dick like pliers. - That doesn't sound good. - I know, it sounds painful. - That's what you have right now. - Yeah, grip the-- - You have the pliers, you can't even get it in there. - And if I did it like a clench in a twist girl. - You have snapper right off. - You are. - And then you'll get that little blood you've been in one. (laughing) - On that note. (laughing) Thank you Bob Rhonda time. I always have the funnest time with you. - I do, I do too. Thank you so much. - And congratulations. If you're a fucking illiterate bitch who hasn't picked up this book. - That's a good book. - No, you gotta get the physical. - You gotta get the physical. And then graduate to the audio for a dessert. And if you don't do it, I will kill myself. - There it is. - Okay. - No, thank you so much. - Slap me. Off camera. (laughing) (upbeat music) (upbeat music)