Best Of Eps 76-80

This is an "I Heart" podcast. Guaranteed Human. Hey, it's J.O. from "Laf" with me, the podcast. Why would you choose "Laf" with me? Well, great question. Maybe you like comedy, maybe you like sports, or maybe you just want to hear from a podcast host who has survived bad bosses, angry customers, questionable career decisions, and a pepper spray attack? Yeah, that's right. Other podcasts have host of broadcasting degrees. "Laf" with me as a survivor. Listen to "Laf" with me, a podcast with Jeremy Odom, on the "I Heart" radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. From Pushkin Industries, I'm Jonathan Goldstein, and this season on "Heavyweight." Jenna wonders why her foster family promised to adopt her, but then never did. In Jade, questions the confession her grandmother made just before she died. She said she is the Mrs. Jones and the famous song "Me and Mrs. Jones." Listen to "Heavyweight" on the "I Heart" radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to "This Is Important," a production of "I Heart" radio, the show where we talk about what's obviously most critically, crucially important. Let's go. Where are we? I don't want to wait for this part to be over. Welcome back. I just blew a booger on my microphone. Oh, cow's back, baby. That's fucking great. Look at these people, look. Adam, is that stuff you were drinking last week? Yeah, I'm back on the saw. Dang it. Did you settle on a flavor of blueberry or what's this one? This is more of a raspberry. Man, were you thinking about it all week? Guys, guys, I joined the USA Pickleball Association. Are you serious? This is the way. Oh my god. Associate. Yep, I joined it. I joined and the reason I joined is because I am going to try and start competing internaments. Oh, are you ready? Are you ready, dude? Yep, that's tight. Wow. I'm so into this. Can I tell you something, Kyle, I'm so worried for you because I remember thinking I was in college, I remember being like, I'm pretty good at bad men. Like in high school, we played it a bunch. I was always bad men and rocks. Maybe the best in our gym class. And then my homie, Tooth, Alex, we would go to open badminton at Wisconsin and go to these gyms. And we would play each other and it was fucking, it was a good time, we had fun. And then these dudes from Asia, where it's a real sport that a lot of people play, we're like, do you guys want to play doubles? And we were like, okay. Okay. Do you, we will, destroy us. Well, yeah, I'm completely planning on getting my ass handed to me on a silver platter, baby. Okay. And is that fun? Well, I got to start somewhere, I'm in a long game here to try and like be professional by like mid fifties. You know, so I have like 15 years to like get through all the ranks and stuff. Yeah, that's true. That is a long, that is a long, long time. Yeah, it's, I'm not in a rush. I'm very much just kind of like going to start seeing if the world is for me. Yeah. I had to have you looked, watched any competitions, have you looked at any level of play outside of like the people you're playing with in Toronto and our homies, six year old parents? Have you looked outside of that? Yes. Well, which by the way, I did play our homies, six year old parents and I got stomped the other day. Right. Sixty year old parents? Sixty five. I think they're 65. Time to go. You got to be part of the association now. Yeah. It was so fucking high. I'm going to take a couple of deep breaths here. Oh, we are, right? Yeah. Everybody take a deep breath. That's a baseline right there. Let's take some deep breaths. Did you see the, it was like a high school sort of talent show or something and they did that riff. Yeah, really? And the school lost their fucking mind. They went crazy. Like was it during like a marching band thing or was it like a talent show? - No, it was like a pepper alley or something and like the band was performing and then they just go boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. - And the school and what's dope is that the teachers, you can't out yourself. You can't be like, you can't do 'cause then everyone's like, well, how do you know what that is? - I don't know, it's just that parliament. - But then one teacher, or you might have been the vice principal, pulled his cock out. - It was like this. - Okay, can we cut the commercial? - Pulled his cock out and just started cranking down. - This was on the video. - It was like a Pavlovian response. He just started the uncontrollably parade. - He was like, he couldn't help himself. He just heard the noise and just started cranking down. (mimicking a drum) - Boom! - Boom! - That's how you did, bro. - You gotta watch the video. (upbeat music) - Your boot was huge. - Oh, yeah. - Because as we've established, most teachers are generally just 99% of the time trying to fill out students. - What? (upbeat music) - 69! - What? - That's our education system? - What, that's our. - We've established that. - Well, we've established, I mean, this might have been when Kyle was on his sabbatical, but yeah. - Right. - Hi, Ades. (laughing) - Yeah, he was high. - That was high as fuck. - We've established that kids are too fucking sexy, dudes, and it's not these teachers' faults. They can't help themselves. - And Adam, can I give you a shout out? Because you said it just kind, you said it a little bit now, and you said it before and I didn't catch it. These kids are getting damn sexy. - Which is, is from a sketch we did way back in the day. - It is, it is. - Oh yeah. - What was that? What sketch? - Isn't it the one sketch we did about a teacher fun of current affairs? - Yeah. - Oh, yes, it was. - We did one. - I played a student who my teacher had sex with me. - Yes, 'cause you were too fucking sexy. - I was super stoked on it, and she was in prison. - Well, you know, your teacher raped you. - Yeah. - 'Cause like, the statutory, statutory early? - We did a lot of fun rape comedy back in the day. - Well, this is an interesting thing because it's like, this dude just scored with his teacher, but in the eyes of the law. - Lady Liberty, right? - He was like, yes, she raped me like, I guess 20 times under the bleachers, and here, she raped me there. - He was all stoked on it, and then I played a cool gym teacher with a thick stash. It really worked that stash for all that I could. - Yeah, was that one mustache that we kept reapplying to your face? - I bet we had only one mustache in our makeup box, right? - We had a few. - Maybe two. - I think that was post-crossbows and moustaches, so I think we had like six or seven. - Dude, we used to have a tackle box, like a fucking fishing tackle box. - I can't get a bottle that had the moustaches in it. - Makeup. - Any sort of props. - I like how Blake says, is that the mustache we kept applying on you? Like you would just withhold you down and put it on your face? - Not again, I'll never do this character again. - It's gonna be funny for us to put it on. - Put it on Adam, you're funnier with the mustache. - Why? - The way that it moves when you move your upper lip, it's hilarious. - Yeah, you were doing that. - You had a lot of fun with that. - Oh yeah. - Which it was, it is. You can do a lot. - We could post that, babe. - God, I really wish Adam would put in a few years with the mustache, but he just refused. What are you waiting for, bro? - We know. - Dude, I can't grow a mustache. - You have like a pencil mustache, right? - You got a thick caterpillar on your upper lip. I got nothing, bud. Mine's wispy as fuck. I look like a 1920s Frenchman. - Man. - I'm a man. - Yeah, you look like a guy from the artist. - Yeah. - What's the one with the dog? - The dog one, the officer. - Yeah, with the little pencil thin, with like a little-- - Yeah, the artist. - Oh yeah. A little, what's that one director's name? What's that guy's name? He has a really scary-- - John Waters. - Yeah, John Waters style. - Dude, John Waters. - Can we give flowers to John Waters? - Well, now he's gonna die. - Oh, you're right. - I'm gonna spread that man. - Yeah, way to go. - Fuck him, serial mom isn't in my top 10 greatest movies of all time. Wing Quang. - Do you remember my 31st birthday? Do you guys remember this? - Can you remind us, is there a clue what-- - The 31 Bonsalute. - Oh my God, hold on. - Do you remember that? - Hold on. - I love it. Blake's like, no. - Do you guys remember when we were doing workaholics? Do you know how mad him is? - No idea what we were talking about? - That was great. - I do remember, we were on set for workaholics. - Yup. - We had, did we have set deck or was it us the night before? We rolled. - I got a hold of a ton of weed and it was like goons and eyes extend in and they rolled. - Let's say allegedly, allegedly employees of ours rolled once. Yeah, 31 of them. - Well, I mean, it's California, we're sorry. - Oh yeah, and we blew it and you walked through? - Yes. - That was the best part was the staging. - Okay, walking through it, but like build it out 'cause it was a fucking great birthday, my goodness. - It was 31 blunt salute and basically it was 15 people standing on one side facing another 15 people on the other side. - Right, that's all he thinks about now. - Like a birthday tunnel, like a birthday tunnel. - Yeah, and I was the one, so it was 15, 15, one. Everybody, we had to like light 'em up, puff, puff, and we played Cypress Hill. - We played fucking hits from the ball, dude. - I was looking through those, 'cause Kyle's brother, baby Neuch, Adam Neuchek, he just dumped a bunch of old photos on us and there's those photos and I'm like, wait, was this us wrapping workaholics? 'Cause I don't remember Kyle going through a tunnel. It's definitely from the 31 blunt salute. - Adam and I were looking at this this morning, me and baby Neuch were checking it out and I was like the fucking 31 blunt. Everybody took hits. Blue it in the tunnel and I had to walk down the tunnel and inhale everything. Damn, that was fucking cool. You walked hella proudly like your chin was high. Yes, dude, if Instagram was cracking, that would have gone frickin viral, dude. Yeah, it was a hashtag, it definitely was a hashtag. Is that how you live, Blake? It's just weird because now, yes, I see everything through the social media lens. That's all he thinks about now. When we were in Workaholics, Instagram was still kind of new. It wasn't like what everyone got everything from. Yeah, we were still using filters and stuff. Yeah. You're still like a way to make your photos look cool and retro. Yeah. Are you talking about like hypstomatic before it's all hypstomatic? Dude, everybody was hyper just distorting their photos and everybody thought it was really cool to make everything like kind of sepia. Like burnt out? Yeah. Fucking cool, dude. I remember that. God, that was so sick. I remember the build up being so big and then walking down the tunnel with everybody blowing smoke and it was like, this is actually fucking living up to the hype right now. Yeah. I don't know if I'm stoned in my own head, but this is like you peaked. One of the sickest things I've ever done. Did you peak at that time? Yeah, that was sick. Okay. I think that was a peak. That was definitely peak. That was similar to what we would do for like Super Bowl parties. Remember, we would the night before the Super Bowl because we always threw, we took pride in our Super Bowl parties. Oh, we did. We always had like two kegs and then like the night before we would roll tons of joints and we just had like a bowl in the middle of that leather ottoman from my dad that traveled from house to house with us. It was an indestructible leather ottoman and we just had a bowl with joints and it was like just take it if you want. This was like Adam's blow, he was like, it's going to be like blow. Dude, it was sick. Those Super Bowl parties were so insane, we got so fucked up, I hardly even remember half of the games. Bro, we used to like wire TVs all over the house, like put one out in the backyard, put one in this room and set it all up like we were a fucking bar. Yeah. This is the way it was super dope. I worked out a service deli and that's, I mean, that was my job too. I just like cleaned up after people and it was just me climbing into a rotisserie chicken machine, a giant machine that just like twirls around 60 rotisserie chickens at a time and just me climbing inside of it at night and scrubbing it. And I'm like, I'm getting paid $7.15 for this. I'm living in a nightmare. Adam's in there like a human terrier, just like they just send you in to fucking get it out. He's like a little bomb dog. Totally dude. And then, but how much we did you smoke in the freezer? That was the best part of the gig because we would go in the freezer and smoke weed and then come out and there'd be a long ass line for sandwiches because obviously it's lunch time, not a great time for us to go smoke weed in the freezer and you come out and I make it a sandwich for someone and I'm too stoned and I remember there, they were like, you know, they're telling me like, no, that's not the kind of cheese that comes with the Monterey Jack and I'm like, oh, I'm sorry. And I sliced my finger open, the tip of my finger. And it was the tip of my finger and it's just like squirting, it's like a cartoon squirt of blood that's coming out and I bleed all over this person's sandwich and I'm too stoned and I don't want them to like know that I'm bleeding and I obviously there's blood everywhere. This is normal. Do not tell me you serve it to them. No, I just start to like wrap it up like I'm going to give it to her and the person's like, what the fuck? You can't give me that sandwich and it goes, and then I try to act like I wasn't bleeding and I go, why? And he goes, oh boy. There's blood everywhere. There's ketchup. And I go there. They say crap. Bullseye brother. Sorry about that, sir. Bon Appetit. That's so wild that you would smoke weed in the freezer because we did that too. We had a code where we say, say, hey man, you want to go to Russia? And that meant go into the giant freezers and you had to look at these giant like fur coats on to go in there because they were massive walking freezers. He looked like the guys in spies like us. Exactly. I like having a code word that brings up more questions, like if you're doing it in front of your boss, you want to go to Russia and then the boss is like, what? Oh, they're smoking weed. Yeah, it's not like, what do you go for? What do you go for? Yeah, I do the dishes. Yeah, it's stock. Is this recent? Is this like post 9/11? They're like, we think he's a sleeper cell. Okay. Yeah, they're like, wait a minute. We've got some terrorist working for us. Holy shit. What a week it's been. It's been. One weeks it looked at me go. Love that track. Bear naked. Is that bear naked? Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. That's bear naked ladies. And how much of that song can you do? Chiggity China. Chiggity China. The Chinese chicken. You have a drumstick in your brain. So it's chicken. Watch it next time. You have that song. You think so? You think so? You think so? And then. And then it kind of fades out. One of the lyrics watching X-Files. I didn't love that song. I didn't. I didn't love that one. Oh, wait. Yeah. That seems like an Adam song. One million percent. Right. Dude, it definitely seems like it should have been up my alley. You might want to revisit that. Like that's a homecoming dance solo Adam Devine's song come on. Situation. Yeah. This is what it was. Here's what it was. Basically, it was already, it was co-opted by another kid. It was his song and he was always, oh, the nemesis. He was always doing it and it was admittedly it was pretty annoying when he did it. So it turned me off on the song. I dodged that bullet move Adam. I'm trying to watch him dance. I would have been the annoying guy doing it. I know I would have. So I'm glad I dodged that bullet. It just wheeled you down the stairs. Well, you can't dance just push your wheelchair down the stairs to go on. They know I could dance. They know I could dance because they, they've seen me at different dances and weddings and they know that the talent scouts are out there. This is getting dark. I'm sorry. We said it. Hey, I got a history of taking off my shirt. It's man. Yo, man. Oh, man. Dude, that is the most Canadian-ass song in Canada. Love. Right. That's the, they like the format Olympics. We put that song in shadows with season three when the vampires were like trying to be human. Like, and there's so funny, some fantastic scenes with it. That song. I got a history of taking off my shirt. It's a funny song. It's a funny song. It's not my favorite song. There's three quotes. We know it's got, it's got a weird spot in your life. I feel like it was them and Bloodhound gang were going at it for like funniest. Bloodhound gang was super funny. Way better. Bloodhound gang is, do it like animals or mammals, right? Yeah, yeah. Discovery Channel. Do it like we do on the Discovery Channel. Couldn't get no. It wasn't. I feel like they were both like, it was like a, a time before irony, right? Is that what it was? Like, people were actually liking those songs. No, Blake, irony is as old as time. Okay. It wasn't just for irony. No, it wasn't. No, it wasn't, dude, you thought pre-1998, irony didn't exist? Okay, yes. Adam Bithi Apple as a joke. I'm aware that irony existed, but it wasn't. I mean, eating the apple as a bit. Nobody was rocking. Actually, I don't know because like Kyle, you wore like a cocoa puff shirt from a hot topic. Was that ironically? Was that the birth of irony? Like with Kyle and his cocoa puffs? Well, I think like more like the spam shirt was probably. Right. More like the spam shirt was the birth of that. The spam shirt birth of that. The spam shirt was the birth of that. Maybe we're the generation that really like embraced like the ironic nature of a consumer itself. Yeah, of course. How do we go to a dog show? I want to go so bad. I used to go to dog shows as a kid. Like, you act like it's the craziest thing in the world. You could just go to a dog show. I mean, it's on ESPN like five times a year. They're at convention centers usually. I want to go so bad. I want to go. Evidently, you don't want to go that bad or else you would have already gone because they're very easy to go to. Yeah, it's pretty easy. I did not know that. I didn't know it was a thing until Corona happened. I saw it on TV and I'm like, this looks so fucking fun. These dogs. You didn't know what about Best in Show. What did you think Best in Show was about? You thought that was a made up world? He'd lost that with his eyes closed. You lose. You lose. We just got Blake and a lie, a little fiveroo. That movie's so good. Flowers. I thought it was super niche. I didn't realize like this was an ESPN event. And there's like actually an audience for it. I didn't know that that was something you could do. I thought you had to be a part of the show or invited. I didn't even know that was something that was real. Can you just stroll up as like an audience member and smoke weed? You're just talking about watching though, right? I'm talking watching. Oh yeah, you'd buy a ticket. If you gave me five years, I'll be the best watcher. Dude, bird watching. Can you go pro with that? Can you be a pro bird watcher? No, because I got to be all in. I got to be passionate about it. And you love dogs. I loved dogs as a kid. My wife's allergic. And now I hate dogs because I know that if I pet a dog and I go home and then my wife's like, were you at a dog? You have to hate dogs. This is like your man cave. Ders has nothing in his life that brings some joy. Ders, you have the coolest backstory to become a pro dog show dude. Yeah, totally. Basically, like, you're sneaking away to train this dog at night. Yep, yep, yep. You keep your dog and your man cave, because-- Yeah, you're like-- It's allergic, but that's how you get away. We have to get in the hazard suit to trim it and stuff. It's like a-- you're the dark horse. He does the gattaka shower after training. [LAUGHTER] Just you know, 12 monkeys getting scrubbed down up the bike. Yeah. [LAUGHTER] Roots were 12 monkeys getting scrubbed down. Where the fuck have you been? Oh, where the fuck have you been? What are these scratches about, honey? What the fuck are these scratches about? [LAUGHTER] Bristles from-- I was cleaning the other day. It's a juniper bush. I was hanging out with Blake. I had to comb Blake. It was a juniper bush outside. He got the claws out. And ran through some rose gardens. My bad. I'm Hamza. And I'm Martin. And we're the hosts of Out of Character. It's a podcast. It's a podcast. I know. There's a lot of them to listen to these days. How are you going to get to us? Well, there's a specific reason why you should listen to us. We are the best podcast in the entire world. I swear. I know, bold. But why don't we list some of the things we might talk about on a regular episode? So sometimes we'll talk about, I don't know, the Uber driver we just had. And how nice they were, or if we tip them or not, come and find out. Sometimes we'll talk about that weird news story from last week. It's the one you're thinking about. Trust me. Or maybe we'll talk about music and what's happening in the underground, or drama and music, or TV shows, or the Med Gala and what the actors wore. What we're saying is we're not afraid to talk about everything under the sun. And if you want to see what that's like, come join us. It's a place where everyone can hang out, anyone, wherever you're from, whatever you're like, you're welcome. Listen Out of Character from Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network. On the I Heart Radio app, Apple Pods, or wherever you get your podcasts. You broke me. You do not deserve happiness. I'm Andrea Gunning. On this season of Betrayal, we meet Carl Bryant. Carl thought he was living a normal drama-free life, until the messages started. You will have hell to pay. For nine months, someone infiltrated every aspect of Carl's life, threatening to ruin him. Cyberstalking, swatting, extortion, impersonation. And then the text threats escalated. Someone's not going to make it out of this alive. There is a problem. It's playing out in real life, not just on the phone. Every piece of evidence pointed to one man. But every piece of evidence was a lie. He was not going to stop unless we stopped him. Listen to Betrayal Season 6 on the I Heart Radio app. Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is Darrell Bell. And I'm Camille Harrison. And together, we're the voices behind the newest podcast on the Black Effect Podcast Network, a different world view with Darrell and Camille. Each Thursday, we're rewatching an episode of the show that changed our lines and so many others, a different world. We're sharing never before heard stories from behind the scenes and sitting down with other stars from the show to hear their unique perspectives. We're also discussing the arts world and pop culture headlines with plenty of laughs along the way. We did a movie called "School Days" and me being a train actor. You get the first shot. And I took the train back. And me being the dude that said, "Hey Spike, you want to teach you something?" And they're coming out of the bathroom with something to say. "Hey Spike, coming out of the bathroom." I made that up. So don't miss the start of something great. Listen to a different world view with Darrell and Camille and every Thursday from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey everybody, I'm Chuck Bryan at The Stuff You Should Know Podcast. And I'm Adam Pranaka of the Greatest Generation and Greatest Trek. We decided to start a golf comedy podcast because we're both big golf lovers and we wanted to spread that joy and it's called "Three Putt Bogey." It's coming from the perspective of golfers sometimes good enough to hit two great shots in a row, but almost never good enough to hit three. And "Three Putt Bogey" is kind of the purest expression of that. Every golfer knows what that's like. Obviously we're gonna talk a lot about the game of golf, how absurd it is, and how fun it is, and how vexing and frustrating. But more than anything, just how much we love the greatest game in the world. We love it anyway. We're putting these out every Friday morning for your weekend golf routine. This is a show about sharing our experiences on the golf course and how absurd and funny they can be. And that's what "Three Putt Bogey" is. It's "Three Putt Bogey" everybody out every Friday. You can listen to it now on the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcast. Evil, they were bad, bad people. As bad as evil. Yes, definitely. That's a clip from our newest hit podcast, "Royal Swindle," about two Australian lovers who conned their way through British high society. In 1996, they arrived in London and won over wealthy businessmen, England's horse-loving elite, and even the queen, all while conning people out of their fortunes. This short lady comes in who barely see over the counter. Everything about a screened, I'm not an international banker. It's a story of love, lies, and yes, horses, told in part by one of the women who lived it. Oh, look, I would say I'm the re-story. But whether I've made you know not, I don't know you. From USG Audio, Blanchard House, and exactly right media, this is "Royal Swindle." Listen to "Royal Swindle" on the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. Goodbye! Do you guys remember when my mom, remember Girls Gone Wild? Oh, yeah. That's the VHS dance. I'm not getting this. We get to play it for people. We need to find that. But the Girl's Gone Wild Teap Song was a free noise, a free sound. There were some steel drums, kind of love steel drums. My mom just liked this song, and it was her ringtone for years. Well, hang on, hang on, because I think you're. Weird, wild stuff. The way you're describing this confusing. You're saying your mom liked the Girl's Gone Wild song. She didn't know it was that song. She picked that. No, my mom's horny as fuck. We know. You come from a long line of sluts, we have to have a stop. His mom was on a mailing list where she had Jerry Springer too hot for TV. She was gay. She was a huge bum fight, personally. No, no, my mom just heard it on her, on like her phone, of free ringtones. And my mom's cheap didn't want to buy a ringtone. I get it, and she just liked that steel drum noise. It reminded her of the Caribbean. There's a reason, it's a hit. And then she. But you know, it was her ringtones who would go off all the time. And it was the Girl's Gone Wild theme song. And what's crazy now is that it's come full circle. Because you and Joe Francis vacation a lot together, right? Cut to commercial, we're old friends. Cut to commercial. You guys play pickleball together, right? Cut to commercial, as I said. And you've gone wild with him? Yeah, I finally picked up pickleball and didn't do it with my homey car. Pickle gone wild, bro. Me and him get wild. We've gone wild with us, bilzarian, uh, Jerry Piven and other local creeps. Hey. We hold ourselves accountable, as we always have. Okay? Smell account, all right, all right. It's science. A-c-ountable. Can we talk about your glasses? A-c-c-ountable. Yeah, let's talk about his glasses. What the fuck is going on? Are you wearing like Kelvin gemstone fashion glasses? Or what are you doing? Yeah, man, I'm trying to rip your show, bro. Everybody watch righteous gemstones. H-m-no, don't do that. That's not what you're doing. Are you wearing them for real though? It was for an audition. They were just right here. I picked them up, but I'm not having a goof. Okay, I'm having a little fun. You look good. Oh, boy. Well, I'm going to take the angle. I'm going to take the road in the highway if you look good, boy. Thank you. I agree. I would love to wear glasses. I wish my eyes were fucked up. Very, very hot spikes. Hotlines. Okay. Yeah. Shut up, bitch. If that gave me an excuse to wear glasses, I would take that. Because of how good you look. Because of the highway I chose. I love the way I look in glasses. Are those your little Richie's fashion aquarium glasses? Oh, these glasses were my. Well, they were basically. We've talked about Teddy several times on the pod. But he wore a similar glass. And he gave me his old glasses. Well, he needed them for vision's sake. I love how you said that. Yes. But when he upgraded his glasses, he gave me his old ones. Because I loved them so much. But these aren't even them. These are just kind of like replicas of them that we got from Costco. Do they have lenses or not that right? Well, I popped them out for the audition I did. Because the ring light was showing. Right, very professional. And what was this cool audition did you do? I don't know if I'm allowed to say. It's under arrest. Yeah, you can't talk about shit. Adam wants to know because he didn't get sent in. He's like, "Well, what's going on?" It was big, too. It was big, guys. - Not gonna get it. - Hey man. - No, I would love to do it. - I'm pissed now. - That's a good feeling where you're like, hey, took all yesterday to study that? Did it today? Not gonna get it? - 12 pages, 12 pages. - Really? - You have to have that. That's damn 12 page audition playboy. - Damn. - Damn, damn son, that's heavy. - Yeah, no. - I'm pissed now. - No, ever since the frickin pandemic happened, auditions are beginning longer. As anybody noticed that, I've been getting three scenes, four scenes. I'm like, you get one to two scenes, brother. - Hey, when you print them out, they're really heavy like that. - Yeah. - Hello. - You can do three. - I can't. - You can do three. - Come on now. - Come on now. - Beginning, middle and end. - Yeah, you wanna see my range of emotion. I get it in character. Can I go here? Can I go there? - Give me the art. - You don't need four scenes. - I'm saying three scenes. I'm saying three scenes is fine. - Most. - No, I want two. - Sure. - Fine, at most, fine. - Two. - At most, Dolby, around sound, at most. - I mean, come on. - Yeah. - Come on, people. - Watch everything Blake's done before. - Oh, where's that? - Guys, Hollywood, listen up. He's not auditioning anymore, all right? He's past it. - Okay, offer only. - You want him to cut the hair? - He'll cut the hair. - Fuck it! - It's gonna cost a little bit of money. - Okay, all right. - Is that what it is? Have we talked about that? You've got a price tag on your locks? - We've talked about it, but I don't think, I mean, I've never given it an official answer. - Let's do that now. - So everyone out there in Hollywood knows what's the price tag for the hair to go. - Okay, so it's frustrating, 'cause I watch movies like Licorice Pizza, right? Where I'm like, I feel like my hair shouldn't be a deterrent for casting me because it's like an era piece. - Right. - So how come first thought of these directors aren't like, oh, we're making something in the '70s or '60s? Like, let's go straight to Blake. He's got the hair already. - Well, Blake, what their mindset is, I want a good actor and then we can grow his hair out. - Yeah. - They worked their way back that way. They don't go for some shitty ass regular guy. - I don't give a fuck. - Somebody who can memorize a couple pages. - Yeah. - You don't think they go hair first? (laughing) All right, give me everybody with hair past their chin out here. - Well, okay, so, but, you know, going along with that, I think I would, it's not so much what I cut my hair for money, I think I would cut my hair for like, if someone who I respected, like as far as like, directly, or-- - And who is that? Who would that be? - So if PTA asked you, you'd be like, yes, is that what you're saying? McRish Pizza Boy? - I would highly consider it. I would highly consider it. I think all Thomas Anderson, everything he does, I would be honored to be a part of, it all looks great. - Who are you holding above, Paul Thomas Anderson? - The Cohen brothers. - Okay, so, Cohen brothers-- - Have you seen McBeth? I should have been McBeth. I don't know why Denzel got it. - Oh, look, you got that, I gotta watch that. - I gotta watch that. - You got that, McBreath. That's why you-- - That's all I kept thinking is like, bro, I did it with Andy Dick. - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Fuck, oh, fuck. That's what McBreath is for. - Yes, that's right. - Here's my scene work with Andy Dick. - So good. - Oh, yeah. - Oh, that is such a great fucking episode. - Would you rather be in a movie with Denzel, Washington, or Andy Dick? - Go. - Well, there's one person that I know I could be. I don't know, Andy's a little problematic, but I love him, he's a god. - Well, wait, I'm, you're more sure of being in a movie with Denzel, Washington than Andy Dick. Andy Dick, you got to wrangle him in. Denzel's gonna be there on the day. - Yeah, if I were to get cast in a movie with Denzel, that would be insane. I imagine he-- - I heard you cut your hair, okay. (laughing) - Okay. - Okay. - That's dedication. - I know, you got a picture from before? (laughing) Can I see what it looked like? - That was a really nice hair. - You had some long hair. - For eight years, wow. - This is you? This is you. - Okay. Okay. - So where's what? You think you've only had that hair for eight years? Hasn't it been over a decade? - I mean, yeah, it's getting up there now. - He says, this one hair, he's after eight years. I've had this hair. - This hair, I've had this. This hair I've had. It's so crazy. - I worked at it. It was a grocery store. I worked at pavilions. - Was that when you were a scab? By the way, because you were a scab. - No, I wasn't. - No, I wasn't. - I thought you were a scab of pavilions. Yeah, you were. - I wasn't a scab. - I was the picketter. - I'm sorry dude, I'm a union member. - And I was out there with the signs. - I got my take back. - Are you sure Adam? - Yes, in Zach and Todd and my two of the mates were scabs. They were like, how much can we get paid? And I'm like, it's like $15, they're paying these scabs. - Oh yeah, it was an apartment divided. - So my roommates, we rode in the same car to work. And I would go stand outside and pick it line and then they would cross the picket line and go inside and go grocery. - Oh for like double what we got paid to do the same work. - You're like, I'll see you in Russia, right? - Yeah. - But you get it, you know. - That's so. - But by the way, dude, striking for like, when you're in like 18, 19 years old and you're already getting paid minimum wage, so it's like, it doesn't matter that much. And you still got paid for a few weeks because you paid into the union. Well, it was fucking awesome. 'Cause all you did was smoke weed in a parking lot. We would drink forties in my buddy's conversion van. - Nice. - And then just hacky sack, play Frisbee in the parking lot and hold the sign. I'm like, this is a good gig. - But all the life's way better than old moms and dads that were here. - Yeah, it was sad for that. - It's touching go here. - Dude. - Dude. - Well context is everything. - You're like, catch, do you want to get in on this cipher? - I mean back. (laughing) - Hey, we're freestyle rapping over here. - Do you hack? - Do you want to go to Russia? - Yeah dude, that was wow. When was that? That was like, it was pretty serious during like, in California, when was that? Like the 2000s, it was right when I moved to LA. - '05. - It was the early 2000s, it was like 2003 or '04. - '04? - Yeah, it was before I moved out to LA. I was still down in Orange County. So it was 2003 and there was a huge strike with all the grocery store employees. And I just remember, like for me, it was just like, okay, we're going on strike. The union tells us to go on strike. I'm just holding a sign. I'm 19 years old. I don't give a shit. Like I'm like, okay, yeah, sure. They should give it more. I don't know. This is all above my head. And some guy just teed off on me. - You're like, people will be looking at me? - Yeah, totally. I'm like, there will be a crowd. - And you're showing up somewhere. - Some guy just teed off on me and was like, he was like, "Fuck you mother fucker." You don't deserve, oh you think you deserve $15 an hour to beg fucking groceries, you piece of shit. - And I'm like, I don't, I don't think that. I don't know. I'll beat your goddamn ass, you son of a bitch. - Ooh, I was like fine making that whatever $8 I was making, you know, I'm just, they told me to go on strike. But people were so riled up, people get so riled, dude. - That's crazy, dude. - I remember kind of not, I was like, what, 23 or something and just going shopping for groceries on my own for kind of the first time as a young man and they're like picketing and I'm walking past it. Like, I don't know. - I just need ice cream and some fucking ego waffles, excuse me. - I just need Arizona ice tea. - Yeah, let me get a block of cheddar and some fucking giant lasagna and I need some stuff. - Yeah, I need some food first. - A couple of hot pockets, duct tape. - This bro got his ass beat for frozen pizza. - But that grocery store was dope. There's all, 'cause it was a Newport coast, so there's all kinds of celebrities that would come in. - Oh really? For example. - Yeah, I remember Elizabeth Hurley was shopping there and she had a delic, very she had a delic too. - Very she had a delic. - I would never ever have sex with you. - Well, you're like, what's your favorite city in Texas? - Austin. - Austin. (laughing) - She walked through the freezer section and then came right over to my section, nipped out. I was on the moon, dude. - Oh my god. - Nipped out, Elizabeth Hurley, um, please. - Holy moly. - She was like a fembot. - I was like, take me to Russia. - And no one understood what I was talking about. - Right, right, right. Even you used it wrong in this instance. - Right. - I had one friend who his mom dropped us off at a mall and we went up to, we went, hit Sparrow for the first time when I was like. - Damn, there's a nine years old that seems so young. - Oh my god. - And there was like a glass elevator for the first time. - Oh my god. - What the hell, this glass elevator. - I'm a generation X, so it's just different. - You're like a real working elevator. It's not a pulley system. (laughing) - Well listen, where's the operators? - They're glass elevators in 1989 or whatever? Or 1990, a glass elevator was like a whole new thing. - Yeah, you're not wrong. That was cool. Like when you could see yourself going up and down, that's fucking sick. - What are you guys 80 years old? - I'm just saying my first class elevator. - Like, shut the fuck up. - You're like, "old is all of us." Okay, we're the same age. - And the fact that you can't understand and like put your mind in the place when you get off on a fucking glass elevator. - Blake has been swallowing his teenage Kool-Aid for too long where he's like, I was actually, I'm only 14 years old right now. - Right. - No, no, no, no, no, no. This is what I'm saying. - I'm like, there's an A's upside down. - Yeah. - I grew up loving Little Yachty and Little Sam. - Mm-hmm. - Those are my boys. - A shout out Little Sam. (laughing) - No, dude, I never had it in my life. - My black is actually a huge influence on me coming up. - I never black. Fucking great fucking glass elevator. That was just a elevator wait no fuck off. What the fuck are you talking about? I remember seeing it and be having my mind blown fuck you dude. What no, I'm I'm with This is fucking actually making me upset. I remember being at a double tree I remember being at a double tree in Waterloo, Iowa as a young boy and there was it was like a big like Willy Wong glass elevator that would go right up the middle and I remember just being like this is fucking insane Future Lincoln Woodtown Center. I'm like, why don't they make all elevators like this? It's not even about it's it's like it doesn't even matter when it came out You know what I mean it like right now I could get on a glass elevator and watch myself go up and fucking Get it and I'm like this is dope. I'm being risen by a mechanized. I'm with you. I'm with you I was raised by a glass elevator. I'm with you but something but something was a little different What what in the early in the early 90s when the glass elevators really came on the scene Like I don't know how you're not involved with this dude. We're talking to 90s man Glass elevators. Did anybody beat off in a glass elevator? In the glass elevators when you would see a couple making out and you'd be on the floor And you're like they're making out in the elevators. Oh my god, you just have to beat off Bro, you beat off. Thank you, God. That's the first glass elevator. I was in the first one. I ever saw it was in commando starring Arnold Schwarzenegger when he's in the chase scene in the mall Why do you guys have such a fucking memory for glass elevators? It was the future dude. Yeah, this is big shit right here It was like seeing an iPhone. It seemed unsafe and yet it was safe I I just did it wasn't something that amazed me or tickled my fancy. I liked hot topic Dude, I just I missed mall culture. It's been so long since I've been in a mall where it just like everything sort of just smells Like the popcorn opalus or the the pretzel the wetzel pretzel pretzel pretzel still is such a fucking hammer Dude, it's a heartburn. You guys fuck up. There was orange Julius That was like the staple of our mall. It was right on the corner It was right next to Mrs. Leal's we didn't have orange Julius was just fucking bang and that was the Oh, yeah, you get an orange Julius. Oh, yeah, you get a Mrs. Field's cookie and you're a couple hot laps, dude You guys have never been on a mudwalk. I would never been on a mudlock You go to like a legit like muddy swampy area and you just like a legit one. Yeah Like a legit like real mud. I'm saying like we're talking real mud here like literally like up to your up to your waist Okay, what's your weight? Yeah, and you're like trudging and crawling through yeah, you would walk through a literal swamp as a child This was a thing in my summer camp where you you'd go on a mudwalk right through this isn't Michigan So it's like it's not a swamp as much as it is just fucking dank muddy like what's right? But there's like all kinds of snakes and shit in there, right? I mean maybe but not really it's not like you're wearing waiters No, no, no, you're that's the whole point is you just naked jack your shoes up get your pants jack off No, you're not naked Kyle Yeah, you're just a naked you jack off You're wild yeah, well wait, so your shoes are getting stuck in the mud. Yeah, I'm getting heavier and I have people loose shoes You got a lace-up super tight. Yeah, um, and then you get fully muddy and then you walk back Because the little mud area was kind of off campus where the cabins are and then you walk back as a cab and you're all muddy Everybody sees you and they're like oh shit looking crazy. You like going hug counselors and all that shit literal shit Yeah, yeah, and so like what is it like the more muddy you are the more you think like Girls are going to like you and shit exactly like he's crazy like oh my god So you're like rubbing mud in your hair. You're like hey, what's up Becca or whatever? Yeah, there's always the one guy who's who eats it in front of the girls to be like I'm crazy and they're like yeah No, no And then you go to the beach part of like the lake right there Oh, and you all get in in your clothes and like the mud comes off Was this like was this a lot a lot of bars your boobs are huge. Yeah, this is great That's how I dude. I like to do and that's a mudwalk and that's when you get new Billion is a lot of money. Yeah, the ton of money by the way. Thank you Because sometimes I'm like what is a billion and it's a ton of money. How many billionaires are on earth? Well, there's a lot more now right like the bell curve has gotten so that you can achieve bill You can achieve a you can get to bill much easy way unobtainable, but no, it's not easy But it's crazy. Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah, it's so since homeboy made that song and then crashed the jet ski Wampum Gangnam style. I want oh Sean can I want to be a billionaire so bad. Is that his song? Oh, yeah, I know that song Is that him or my thing? I want to be a billion. I don't know. That's him now. I'm confused in the suicidal Wait, wait, why are we we're burying the headline? I fucking got jumped in casting What fucking Daniel Radcliffe is playing Weirdo Yankevich in a biofilm. Yeah, no, I know the whole fucking reason I am what I am Yeah, the motherfucker swooped me. This needs to be an internet campaign It's it's a yell campaign. This is not a whisper campaign. This is a yell campaign. Hey Blake. Why don't you eat it? Oh, hey, I'll tell you right now. This wasn't an audition for Weirdo's movie. It should have been I didn't even get a fucking read. Yeah Oh, oh Professionalism aside. Do we think Daniel Radcliffe is the guy for Weirdo? I don't know what did he do? He might have not done anything I was thinking about I don't know what the fuck is going on. I don't get it I don't I mean I get it I understand that a lot of people who watch that sketch now have the keys to green lights especially in a fucking content Like watch what sketch, but the Weirdo biopic, but he wasn't weird I was Aaron Paul. I know but it's based on that There was a step Aaron Paul sketch that was like it's a long time ago. It's a funny or die sketch called weird starring Aaron Paul where it was a dramatic take directed by Erica Pell from Workaholics sure a couple episodes one or two. Oh you guys That's my impression now funny guy and now fucking whatever 10 years later over a decade there is Roku original content green lighting that concept for a movie and Radcliffe is coming in Roku. Yes. Yes. Do you think that they're approaching this movie as like a super hyperserious thing or do you think it's gonna be a comedy? I like I don't know what the tone of this movie is about it It's gonna be like forest gum tone where there's gonna be like touching go moments where it's like you're so fucking weird And he's like I'm gonna be weird forever Like UHF is gonna be like the thing everyone's like it didn't make any money You know and then Michael Richards is gonna be saying like the N word constantly to like see that up That is that is the sketch. That's what it is. I know that's the sketch. Yeah, I will then they're just gonna do it But not tongue-in-cheek probably I don't like kind of like doing the fresh prints like reboot in the drama where they're just like Flipping fucking things. It's like what are these green lights? Is there a fresh prints reboot? I don't know. Yes. There's a dramatic. There's an hour long Reinterpretation of the fresh prince dramatic. Is it just called the prince or something? Maybe it's called Bel Air I don't know. I like that's a genius to see that's how you sell it in the room the judges nephew But but but but who's green lighting these fucking things? It's the people who like laughed and like are like oh that'd be so funny if that's what I'm saying like who's got the finger on the But what's the whole world god crazy? I'm Hamza and I'm Martin and we're the hosts of out of character. It's a podcast I know there's a lot of them going around, but why should you listen hours? Well, we're only the best podcast in the entire world and we talk about pretty much everything under the sun for example Music we're listening to underground music trending music drama in music worlds. Yes Sometimes we even talk about just everyday mundane situations in our lives like the cool Uber driver We just had or the food we just say that is surprisingly delicious or we'll talk about the med gala and the looks that they wore Are they awesome? Are they trendy come find out because our opinion matters and so does yours and this is a place where all of our Mines can come together and connect so what are you waiting for come connect with us? Listen out of character from Will Ferrell's big money players network on the I heart radio app apple pods or Wherever you get your podcasts you broke me you do not deserve happiness. I'm Andrea Gunning on this season of betrayal We meet Carl Bryant Carl thought he was living a normal drama-free life until the messages started You will have hell to pay For nine months someone infiltrated every aspect of Carl's life threatening to ruin him Cyber stalking swatting extortion impersonation and then the text threats escalated Someone's not going to make it out of this alive It's playing out in real life not just on the phone Every piece of evidence pointed to one man But every piece of evidence was a lie He was not going to stop unless we stopped him Listen to betrayal season 6 on the iHeart radio app. Apple Podcasts. or wherever you get your podcasts. And I'm Adam Pranika of The Greatest Generation and Greatest Trek. We decided to start a golf comedy podcast because we're both big golf lovers and we wanted to spread that joy and it's called "Three Put Bogey." It's coming from the perspective of golfers who are sometimes good enough to hit two great shots in a row, but almost never good enough to hit three. And a Three Put Bogey is kind of the purest expression of that. Obviously we're going to talk a lot about the game of golf, how absurd it is, and how fun it is, and how vexing and frustrating. We love it anyway. And that's what Three Put Bogey is. It's Three Put Bogey everybody out every Friday. This is Darrell Bell and I'm Kadeem Harrison. And together we're the voices behind the newest podcast on the Black Effect podcast network a different world view with Darrell and Kadeem. Each Thursday we're rewatching an episode of the show that changed our lines and so many others, a different world. We're sharing never before heard stories from behind the scenes and sitting down with other stars on the show to hear their unique perspectives. We did a movie called School Days and Me Be In. A train? You get the first shot so I took the train back and go ahead and you're being the dude that said, "Hey Spike, you're on the street you saw him and they're coming out of the bathroom with something." And today Spike, you're coming out in the bathroom. I made that up. Listen to a different world view with Darrell and Kadeem every Thursday from the Black Effect podcast network on the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. Bloomberg's Big Take podcast has everything you need to know about the most expensive midterms in U.S. history, like the money being spent to control the Senate. Everyone has been waiting to see how Trump will spend his big work just. He was sitting on nearly half a billion dollars. How candidates are rewriting their party's playbooks. You have El Saeed, who is a former health official, giving rise to a lot of the economic populism. I'm wondering where you see this sort of definition of the working class going from here. Well, it's essentially now everyone, right? 50% of college educated workers consider themselves working class, 50% of high earners do. And how big business is throwing its money into the ring. Gambling, super PACs, sports betting companies, there is obviously the AI super PACs. Don't just witness history unfold, understand it. They redistricted Texas, we're the Mac daddy and it's going to backfire. Catch the Big Take podcast every weekday and tune in Wednesdays for the latest on the midterms. Listen to the Big Take on the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. I used to work down in Newport as well, dude, I had, I had, I worked at, at Vans and fucking we had a celebrity sighting once Dennis Rodman rolled up in his like, oh, well, he's a Newport legend, wow, the Elizabeth Hurley of men, dude. So evidently the coolest people live there, dude, I remember I had just finished like painting the curve outside and he rolled up with his Hummer and just put his tire right on it. That can't be a little, it was tire right on it, dog. Yeah, what color were you painting the curve? It was Vans checkered. I think it was just repainting it because it was Vans bro, it was Vans so you skate outside and the curve will get kind of fucked and I guess I guess corporate probably wanted it painted because they could. Big corporate. Yeah, Vans was fucking going big at that point. Yeah, Vans can't have evidence of skateboarding in our parking lot. Vans is a wild ass company, they've gone like, I mean, now they've gone nuclear, but take five minutes. Go for it. I mean, you want to talk about Vandoren? Go after them. Biggest fucking collaborations like out there. It's like Vans and fucking Disney and stuff. It's like, oh my god. Yeah, I feel like. Thank you, God. What? Are they, I feel like Nike might have bigger collaborations, but I said like the biggest. I didn't say. You can't give much. But yeah, I hear you. I definitely hear you. Yeah, they're big allegedly. I got my take back. Let me just, let me write down that take back. That's rocks. No pen inside. Okay. Let's search for some scratch paper. Did you smoke weed anywhere at that store, Kyle, did you smoke weed at work? Oh, oh, always good, yeah, in the back, because there was actually like a little annex. You had to, you had to stock shoes up top so you'd go up the back and, and stock the shoes in the back stock. And that's where Russia, yeah, it wasn't as cold as Russia, but we used to, like, call it like, you know, the forest. Shoot. Shoot. Shoot. Shoot. And be like, yeah, no, I just like, I used to manage that store. So it was like, where you were the manager, that's right. How did that happen? I was the third key. There was two keys above me, but I was the third, but like, you opened up in the morning or something? Yes, sir. I opened up. I counted the dough. I counted the inventory and I said, we're open all, wait, you counted inventory every morning. Yeah. Yeah. Well, not every morning, but you do count it. Yeah, because I opened up a, uh, LaCosta and they were like, just be awake and couldn't do it. Oh, my goodness. This is the way. Uh, bro, my move would be, I would see a bunch of hot chicks and then I was, I was, I was good on that. Okay. We had to go talk to them, but it wouldn't say that I was into them because I was too chicken shit to do that. And I'd go up and be like, hey, what's up, cute girls. My friends over there like you. And then my friends, and then I'm talking to them and then my friends would end up making out with them in like a, uh, changing room at a JC penny. Okay. So yes, the mall would be the place where, because usually when you were in high school or junior high or whatever, the girls you talk to were the girls you went to school with, but the mall was where all the schools came to one place. So you would see girls, I was like boys and girls that you didn't see every day at school. Yes. You be like, man, these guys are handsome from that other school. We can't compete. Yes. I remember this vividly. Look at those flat brown. I met this girl that went to a different middle school, right? We were in eighth grade. Go on. And we, we were talking and then we became AOL buddies and we would, I, uh, in some message each other. Right? Oh, damn. And then she told me that she wanted to see my penis. Oh, damn. Uh, get hard. Goodbye. Well, so she wanted to see it get hard. And you were like, it's already, she's like, I, I, I, I really want to see, she didn't want to see it hard. She wanted to see it get hard. She wanted to watch it go from soft to hard. Did you tell her? No, you don't, you don't want to see that. Yeah. No, no, no. She's probably like a scientist now. Huh? But I was like, he was kind of exciting. It was kind of exciting. And then we saw each other. She's a scientist probably now. Yeah. It's cool. I'm sure she's a doctor or scientist or something. Yeah. It's very interesting to watch it change. I think she's probably on the forefront, uh, Fauci probably, uh, she, uh, Danielle Fauci. But then we saw her at a, uh, like a soccer, um, tournament. And I remember thinking, and she came up and was talking to me. And then I remember thinking the whole time, like, she's going to want to see my science. It is. At this soccer tournament. Like she really, she was like someone is me like trying to like wiggle it in my jeans to try to like make sure it's not going from completely not hard. Why were you wearing jeans at a soccer tournament? You play soccer. I wasn't, I wasn't playing. I wasn't playing. It was my friends were playing. He was there scooping, scooping ladies. Wow. I was a scooping ladies. Yeah. And then obviously nothing happened. But, uh, things could go down at the mall. I had friends make out with girls at JC Penny changing rooms. Things could happen. Yeah. That's cool. Oh, that was way cool. I definitely feel like I missed out. Yeah. You didn't do mall culture. No, we just didn't have one. I mean, there was one another town over, but you would go there to go see movies. And that was kind of it. Or like to go shopping with your mom because that was like the department store. Movies and malls was very weird for me. We didn't have that growing up. Those were separate. So once I started seeing movies and malls, I did not understand that. Yeah. That was, you had to tow the line there. I did not get that. You didn't understand it. Not for me. No, they were so appropriate. Wait, what? Yeah, those are separate things. Do I have to shop? That should be a dillard. It just, uh, yeah, it just seems like, uh, it's, yeah, it doesn't make sense. It seems like you don't want to spend like six hours at the mall watching a movie and Lord and Taylor and movies. Yeah, no, JC Penny and movie, no, this is not happening. That's not good. That is funny. Like as a kid, as a little boy, like how many things that you would do that you're like, chicks are loving this. Oh, my God. They're loving this. For example. Oh, dude. Mudwalk. Like, we used to ride bikes and then just like, just like, right down some stairs in front of girls. Yeah. And like, they give a shit about me, like riding my bike downstairs because you're a jack hammer. Yeah. No one knows. But just in your like, little, little boy brain, you're like, oh, they're going to love this. Reagan, Brittany, check this shit out. I mean, while it's just me going down six years, you like that, you like that? That's pretty crazy right not really just skidding out in front of them totally. What's up? You almost hit me Rocket me. Ow what the fuck? I sat on my balls. I Kind of remember just doing like big jumps down hills to impress girls like at the top of the hill You just like run oh yeah like in your shoes or on a bike No like just jumping like running and like jumping and you get like extra air because it's like you're going down Remember and then you roll a little bit and get back up and be like Yeah, and in your head. You're like that was insane I looked like an explosion was going off behind me Yeah, and you're like they had to love that and you're looking over at them And then you go get the hairspray and put it all over your hand and light it on fire and be like look at me Look at me. So you're the guy who ate the mud for sure. No, I didn't eat the mud, but I went myself on fire. I'm not eating mud Did you guys ever think like oh tonight? I'm gonna get probably super wasted and then tomorrow I'm gonna wake up and I'm gonna be in a fucking porn Why weren't their dudes gone mild? Why weren't there just bros whipping their dicks out in hell or coptering it? I guarantee you they were like that's a real big 100% chance that in West Tollywood the thing is is We were there. We weren't cute enough to get asked right. Yeah, it wasn't about being cute It's just no whip your dick. Yeah, it was like are you gonna do it? No, it's about being cute. No, yeah There's a standard for the people watching these videos dude. We were walking around West Tollywood just at the time Know what I mean that guy's gone wild was definitely being filmed in West Tollywood is right and we were in those streets Never were approached. That's a thing. No, of course. It's a thing No, they just aren't gonna pay for ad space on commercial television because people are like We don't want that but if you go to the store or you go online I guarantee you there was dudes gone wild Blake. There's a 100% possibility that guys gone wild was a thing I am saying that it probably does but I'm not saying we wouldn't have made the cut I'm not saying we're having like a whole section dedicated to us But we're in a montage whipping our dicks out. Yeah, that's what I mean. Okay. I'm saying we were there a quick You were in the place that it was happening. We were in West Tollywood. We were there every day We lived there, but we never had our dicks out. We were never approached We weren't and if we were you already know I feel like on all the ween we would have done it What you what you feel that but it never happened Yeah, and they were there true. It's true. They were looking that the gay Joe Francis were out there Scoping the scene and they looked at you right in the eyes and go nah We're gonna pass that Adam Do you think that back then if you were like looking for it? You could have found it and just made it happen Oh, yeah, it looking for it. I was looking to pull my tooth. Why always was yeah, I know you were so So maybe not so maybe not you could trip and fall on a dick Yeah, no, it's not hard to get it's not hard to trip and fall into the world of gay porn. That's not hard of pornography How long do you think it would take you all you have to do is go to a gym in LA tomorrow morning You should do this tomorrow morning. I bet Blake would have a harder time getting into gay porn No, then he thinks there's already a dude named Blake Anderson in gay porn I know because it pops up on my Twitter. Yeah, exactly. That's a hurdle. That's a hurdle Every once in a while people will send me photos of me getting butt-fucked All right, that are photoshop fucking Of like gay pornos that they photoshopped like my face on. Yeah rude Uh, and everyone's alive. I get those in the old DMs which is pretty cool. Hey, everybody listening at home. We are entering minute 17 of this conversation Yo, this is important Coming in hot. That's my bad. I should have saved this for 69. Let's look back around call this one 69 again That shit's important. I'm take two. How about those ramps? How about the rams? I know a couple ramps I don't want to talk about my rams. I'll talk about rams all day. Maybe fall back Let's get weird. Do you remember your first weird-out sighting in LA? Because I do feel like it is a Like a people are like, oh yes, because I saw it Pachito moss and I was like, that's fucking weird out. Oh, dude stars. They're just like us weird wild shot And I just want to tee you guys up because I wasn't there for this and this is the backstory and maybe we've told this on the podcast But you guys saw weird-out at the orange county, yes, festival or whatever. Yes. Yes, and before he was coming out on the poodle hat tour before he came out on stage You guys started the chance of match get weird get weird. Yes, that's right. We're Teddy. We're Teddy. We we we've covered this Yeah, we have covered that. Yeah, it was during the poodle hat tour at orange county fair And that was the moment that the let's get weird movement was kind of born Right, and then brought you guys brought it to the show and then the NHL took it and then then the NHL and then and then and then vise I do remember going back home to like party like for Thanksgiving or or Christmas or whatever. Um, I'm a big Christmas guy Um and seeing friends and they're like, yeah, man, let's go out and get let's get weird and I'd go right and they go And someone would be like that's you know, that's from like his show and they go what are you talking about people say that and then I'd be like Yeah, I'm not gonna you get caught. Yeah, you get caught in the middle of like on defend it. It's like whatever Well, no, yeah, someone's like, no, that's from what that's their show and they're like dude. No, everyone says that and I go, well, well, I uh Here's the question. Uh, bondage. Yeah, you want to talk bondage. Did we ever jerk off that word? I know we I know we smoked weed at word at work at work. Does anybody work at a church and jerk off? That's the word. What's going on without them today? Okay, dude. Human chunking. Uh, did you guys jerk off at work or with this is a strict uh, no jerk off strictly uh, spoke weed Strictly dickly bro. Well, I mean, I was well is always like you did. Okay, great. But what's the story? Yeah, well, or was this strictly professional? Well, uh, no, I don't think I ever did. I wanted to catch. I don't think I did. I don't think I did I think all my jerk off stories were at TJ Maxx. Uh, yeah, under my starter jacket. I'm trying to think if I did at work At the work of haul. Well, the work of Hawks office doesn't count. You had to have jerk. No, I definitely jerked off at the work of Hawks office The work of Hawks house was technically our work for a little bit. Allegedly. I jerked off at all work of Hawks sets. Allegedly. I definitely jerked off Under my desk at the work of Hawks. Well, technically you guys lived at the house. So Yeah, definitely That's what I'm saying. Exactly. Exactly. Adam couldn't come unless he had a man knocking at his door in the morning. The butler You guys are telling me late nights we're working late. What you're in your office. No one's around. You didn't crank one down At the desk at the work of Hawks office. Yeah, probably. No, I did. Yes. I just imagine like a ghost taking the reins You know what I mean? It would not have been I don't think it would have been late night for me It wouldn't have been so fun. It was early morning if anything for me because I used to open up that office all the time So when I was you open like bands. So it was Man, they die hard. Oh my god. A Russia. That was when I had my time. He used to jerk off into half cabs, dude It was just a night out. Yeah, it's the shoe it's shoe goo, bro Nighthouse uh, he's leaving. You're just in the hallway cranking down You ever uh jack up with night out? You just walk around with your cock out. It's a bagel. Will you explain night out? Night out. Oh night out was our night assistant our editorial assistant legend It goes Dennis Robman night out. That's my legend ladder. Let's also explain what a night time assistant for editing Yeah, so a nighttime assistant basically takes the cards the memory cards from what you shot on the day and downloads them and imports them into the editing software Or the avid and they have the horrible job of doing that overnight so that the editors the next day can start to cut Yes, and it's not like labor intensive, right? You just have to kind of be there to get it done. Yeah, it's stressful But it's not labor intensive because if you lose the footage there's a lot of downtime You're fucked if you lose the footage you're fucked you are fucked you're dead. Yeah, so basically every Say I'm thinking the same Night assistant is just cranking down constantly all night all night you're constantly cranking. Oh yeah, dude That was one of my first jobs. I was a night assistant and I did have keys to that place. Well as well and yes, yes, sir There's some downtime and that was the keys we're getting through yeah Was that when you were ready to work or no because that that would lend itself to no I was an assistant I was an assistant editor at a trailer house At a trailer house in Santa Monica who will remain unnamed Kyle how do we get back to this how do we get back to this every week Beating off. This is just like these are real questions. These are real questions that guys have We can't get away from it. Sorry about it haunted by it. You want to peek behind the curve behind the curve Are you guys one of Hollywood? This is with the boys talk about a lot of downtime, baby. I'm Hamza, and I'm Martin, and we're the hosts of Out of Character. It's a podcast. I know. I swear. I know. Bold. There's some of the things we might talk about on a regular episode. Trust me. Or maybe we'll talk about music and what's happening in the underground, or drama and music, or TV shows, or the Met Gala and what the actors wore. Listen out of character from Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Pods, or wherever you get your podcasts. You broke me. I'm Andrea Gunning. Carl thought he was living a normal, drama-free life, until the messages started. Cyber-stocking, swatting, extortion, impersonation. Listen to Betrayal Season 6 on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, everybody. I'm Chuck Bryant at The Stuff You Should Know Podcast, and I'm Adam Pranaka of The Greatest Generation and Greatest Trek. We decided to start a golf comedy podcast because we're both big golf lovers, and we wanted to spread that joy, and it's called Three Putt Bogey. It's coming from the perspective of golfers who are sometimes good enough to hit two great shots in a row, but almost never good enough to hit three. And a Three Putt Bogey is kind of the purest expression of that. We love it anyway. This is a show about sharing our experiences on the golf course, and how absurd and funny they can be. And that's what Three Putt Bogey is. It's Three Putt Bogey, everybody, out every Friday. You can listen to it now on the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. And I'm Cadeem Harterson. And together, we're the voices behind the newest podcast on the Black Effect Podcast Network, a different world view with Darrell and Cadeem. We did a movie called "School Days" and me being a train. You get the first shot and I hit the train back, you go ahead and you're being the dude that says, "Hey Spike, you want to treat you some and they're coming out of the bathroom with something?" And say, "Hey Spike, you're coming out of the bathroom." I made that up. I said, "I'll miss the start of something great." Listen to a different world view with Darrell and Cadeem, every Thursday, from the Black Effect Podcast Network, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. "Evil, they were bad, bad people." "As bad as evil." "Yes, definitely." That's a clip from our newest hit podcast, Royal Swindle, about two Australian lovers who conned their way through British high society. In 1996, they arrived in London and won over wealthy businessmen, England's horse loving elite, and even the queen, all while conning people out of their fortunes. "The short lady comes in who barely see over the counter. Everything about a screened, I'm not an international banker." It's a story of love, lies, and yes, horses, told in part by one of the women who lived it. "I would say, I'm the story, but whether I've made a note or not, I don't know." From USU Audio, Blanchard House, and exactly right media, this is Royal Swindle. Listen to Royal Swindle on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Goodbye. I know girls like me, for sure, I was like the little cripple kid, but older kids definitely wanted to get me drunk. That I think was like people was like, "It would be hilarious if we got divine drunk." So I was always that freshman kid that they would keep to senior parties. And everyone was like, "The difference between a freshman and a senior is. " Starts at the penis. Starts at the penis. Yeah, that is crazy because you can have 13. Your boobs are huge. I was such a child, and they're like 18-year-old kids teaching me how to beer-bong. Can you be 13 when you start high school? Is that a thing or are you 14? Sure. You can be eight. You can live your house. Yeah, doogie housework. If you're a freaking genius. Yeah. I wasn't. I wasn't. That it was not my affliction. So. I think I think there was 14. And that's why you never rock before. It was wild that you mentioned that, Ders, because I kind of forgot that we did kind of see the birth of coffee shops in our neighborhood, too. I remember we had this place called Moca Lisa. Oh, so this is cool to you, but the glass elevators is not? No, no, dude, it was really weird that lit. There's always been coffee shops. No, I love glass elevators. It was such a weird thing where going to a coffee shop was like this fucking cool thing to do as like a fucking a young high school student, but it made a high school people feel like they were grownups. Yeah, absolutely. And it was just like a sense of freedom to go do your homework there. Yeah. You could like bring your skateboard there and then skate in the back of the coffee shop or whatever and smoke some siggies. It was way before it was like monopolized. It was crazy. You could actually like I remember like some of my first public cigarettes like where I was like, I'm smoking this. I don't care. We were in front of a coffee shop for sure with older kids because I could hand it to them if anybody rolled up and they would give me the fucking siggies and then definitely didn't hang out at a lot of coffee shops. We would hang out at like restaurants where like it was like zero dollars to eat there. Buffalo Wild Wings. Yeah, there was a lot of Buffalo Wild Wings, honestly, but then the first one. It was like a lot of there was a Chinese restaurant that they just didn't care what the shit we did. Like you could get a plate of fried rice for $0.80. Oh, yeah. You just eat a fucking, fucking fried rice and sit there and then sit there for like four hours. The cost of diary. And just like, you know, play cards or whatever. Yeah, I'll take another one. Play cards and eat fried rice. Another round. Two kids are so cool. I just imagine being a grown-ass man eating $0.80 fried rice, playing cards with your own eyes. You just haven't figured out. Was that place still open? No, it ended up giving like everybody food poisoning like someone died, I think. Yeah, they shut it down. I was like, I think someone legit died from eating their food. Right. Sorry. That happened to us when we were in, when we moved to the valley, we found that really cheap. Like, do you guys remember that fried rice spot and we all got it and we all got sick? Do you guys remember that fried rice spot? That fried rice spot. Not that Chinese restaurant. It was like 99 cent fried rice and we got it. It seems real. It was when we, it was when we shot, it's where eating it and you guys are eating it in the beginning of the proto, not the proto tank sketch, the one, like, dude's house. Oh, sure. It's where you're eating, it's in bed. The fortune cookie. Oh, yeah. Classic. Yeah, you guys are scarfing on it at the beginning of that. That's the fried rice I'm thinking of. It was so bad. Right. I remember that being pretty good. Yeah, it was delicious. It tasted good, but it fucked you up in the long run, I think. Whatever, man. I'll take it. Do you remember one? We found out that MSG was the ingredient because we were like, there are a lot of Chinese restaurant stalls. There will be like a sign that says like no MSG because I guess that used to be a thing back in the day that Chinese restaurants were known for putting MSG, which is a kind of like a salt, like a spice that you put on into food that it makes you like almost addicted to that food. It opens your taste buds up. And it makes it just taste fucking delicious and you're like, oh, I gotta keep eating this. So we got producers also, please put in facts what it actually is. We got. Oh, I don't know. We got these MSG, the spice. Do you remember that? And then we were putting it on our food. I remember this very well. Oh, yeah. It comes in cubes. No, ours. It was like a salt shaker. Yeah. We went to a weird ass like 99 cent store because we we were so bored. I feel like it was like a big flop. Yeah, maybe, and they had like a straight up shaker of MSG. - Easy memory of it being a big lot? - I think it was like a big lot. And we got a spice set, and MSG was there, and we put it on everything, and then we called it the flavor enhancer. Was it off the chain? - And it gets hot at work. - Oh yeah, dude. - Yeah. - Just to throw it on popcorn. It was cooking off the chocolate, some homosodium, glutamins. - We put it in our energy during this. - Dude, and we're fine. Adam just had to piss crystals, but. - Oh yeah. - Yeah, will you read that description, Adam, right there? - The basic sensory function of MSG is attributed to its ability to enhance savory taste, to active compounds when added in the proper concentration. - It sounds good. - Well, why the foot, what's so bad about it though? Why is it outlawed? I have no idea. - I don't like it because it does, it like truly makes you addicted to that thing. It's like an additive that isn't an actual food. So I think people were like turned off by it. Now we were turned on by it. - Maybe there's a medical issue because it could constrict the blood vessels or something too much. - Well, it does have the word sodium in the word, in monosodium. So maybe it's bad. - Hey, nice catch, go ahead. - Thank you. So maybe it is a- - Good science. - I don't know. - Good catch. - Wow. - Good catch. - Keep going. (laughing) - Yeah, and sodium is bad because why? - Good catch, sodium. - Conspiratory blood vessels. - You are sodium. - I think it constricts. - Oh, give him points. - Give him points. - Oh, try it. - You are sodium. - Yes, points. - Thank you. - Yes, points. - Oh, that was smart. - And wonders, you are sodium. - Oh my God, I don't know. Yeah, it's all I know is like sodium. (laughing) - You are sodium. - I just caught that. The chunk was real. I just caught that. - You gotta do the ladies' voice. Will you play it? Do you have it anymore on the board? - You are sodium. - It's not a lady by the way. It's a really cool guy. - Not even better. - Even though I don't have it anymore. I'm sorry. - Dang, I guess I'll have to live as that for the rest of the podcast. - Yeah. (dramatic music) - By the way, blading is back in a big way. I'll say that, blading is back. I live on the beach. Roller blades are back in a real way. - That's different than aggressive. - I bought mine during the pandemic, for sure. - That's different than aggressive skating. Aggressive skating is the grinds and the conquerors. - Hey, I'm with you. I had some grind plays. - Here he goes. - Did I ever grind? - No. - The first time I did it, I almost snapped all the bones in my legs. So I immediately stopped doing that. - I'm pissed at him. - What happened at him? Almost had a re-snap. - Yeah, I fell hard when I put on my brother's skates thinking I could do it. It's not easy. And neither are the soaps, okay? And neither are the soaps. - You like cross your legs to do it, right? - Oh, yeah. - You could do that. - That's one of them. That's one of the skills. - That's not the way you do it. - No, you can do, you can go like this. You just go at this, we have to land at the exact same time or else you slip out. - It's sick. Check out some vids, it's sick. - I'd love to. - So Austin Anderson, one of my groomsmen, you guys all know him, he got soaps in high school. He never rollerbladed in his life. And he was like, dude, I got soaps, check this out. And I, once again, think it was this. - Give me five years, I'm gonna be pro. - Once again, think it was the type of thing of him going like, oh, chicks are gonna love this. Wait till they get a load of me. Why would he soaps? - He's grinding. - And he jumped up on this rail and slipped. And I think he broke his tailbone. Like he landed and was like, no, no, no, no, no. It was like, just like violently injured right away. Like I feel so many kids got hurt with those goddamn shoes. - Hey. - Yeah, I wonder how quickly we could get in gay porn. - If you set out tomorrow, do you think you'd be doing it within 48 hours, like doing it filming within 48 hours? - Well, I think now because of the internet, I would just go and find gay porn producers and hit them up. And then, yes, I could. - And so 48 hours? - And in 48 hours, I could be. - I mean, you can get an audition. You could get a read. Do you think you could be doing it in 24 hours? - I bet I could do it this afternoon. - Do you think it's seven hours? - That's insane. - Oh, no. - Dude, no. - Well, I'm like, I don't think if I was just a person, but I'm an actor that, we're actors that people know. A gay porn producer would go, oh, fuck yeah. Come here, I'll fuck you right now and film it. - He would, he'd clean his slate for the day. - Yes, it's like if you're like, dude, I'm on the fucking edge. I need to go now. I need it in the next two hours. - I need to now. - Film me, 'cause this may pass. - I'm hard now. - Let's fucking film it, Jack. - I'm ready to shoot now, Jack. - I'm ready to shoot. - Now, Jack. - I won't shoot you. I won't shoot you in the state. - I'm a state of California. - Jack, exactly. Man. - Let's go. - By the way, I tried to talk about the rams. - Duran is the funniest movie of all time. And like, in a, - Like, splice, splice, splice, splice. - Splice is the funniest movie all time, because it's essentially like a doctor who's trying to like create a being or like a, like a fan. - Freakin' Stein's monster. - And it comes out and it's actually kind of hot. And he's like, I gotta fuck it. - Yeah, and then, I know we've talked about it before. - But then he fucks it. And then it turns into like a super mutant. You gotta watch it. - You gotta watch it. - What happens? What, I can't remember that third act. I just remember when he was like on top of Dren. - Yeah. - Like, what the fuck comes in as it's going on? - What are you doing? He's like, yeah. - And then it like starts to sprout wings and starts like, it's just fucked. - Dude, what are those days like on set? - What is Adrian Brody like? Okay, today's the day. - That's the shit. - Today's the day. - You know, I'm ready. - I'm ready. - It's the same movie as Lady in the Water almost where like somebody's fucking, but like in-- - Is it Lady in the Water? Is there a shape of water? - Shape of water, thank you. - Shape of water. - Yeah, yeah, Guillermo. That is a Guillermo deal to our project. - Yeah. - What was the one that with Paul Gianmatti that M. Knight Shalaman moved? - That's Lady in the Water. I never got through that one. - Which was also kind of about fucking like a fish, right? - It was like a pool and you like went underneath the drain and the movie was-- - And then you went into another universe or something? - That movie was something else. - Terrible. - Do they overtly fuck a creature? Was that like a metaphor behind the-- - I never saw that. - He just stuck his dick down the drain and was like, "Whoa." (laughing) - Just testing that. - I'm not really-- - Not bad. (laughing) (laughing) (laughing) (laughing) - Thank you. - That's one of the movies where like you-- (laughing) - You watched the whole movie and then in the last five minutes, it pulls out to reveal that it was just Paul Gianmatti with this dick stuck in the fucking Jets going-- (laughing) - I like it. - I like it. - That was the M. Knight Shalaman twist. (laughing) - Dream. - You were there and you were there. You were a fish. - Did you fuck me? - Dude, you passed out with your dick stuck in the vacuum of the pool field. (laughing) - Oh. - I was doing another dimension. You're like, "Dude, you weren't the kept coming." - It was the pain. You, you, you, not your blast. - You, you passed out from the pain, but your body was still coming. (laughing) - Dude, that's too gross. - We almost, we almost left you. It was so gross. - And that is the shape of water. (laughing) - No, that's lady in the water. - No, lady in the water. - Lady in the water. (laughing) - Lady in the water says dick in the drain. (laughing) - That actually was kind of what the episode we did where we go into Bill's, he's a dream member. In all turn out, we were like jerking them off. That's right. - Oh yeah, what the fuck was that? The twist. - They were making him come. - The end of Bill's episode where he was having a dream where he was like, in the dream he was fucking a man to serve him. - A man to serve him, right? - Great. - Awesome. - But in reality, we were jacking him off. (laughing) - And he was, - With like a backstretcher or something. - Or like some kind of like fiber. - Yeah, like put it on his lap and he come to his pants. - Oh my god. - What was the vibrator? I can't remember what we used. - You must have been selvenom. - It was like a massager or something. (laughing) - That's crazy. - That was the twist. You're coming. You fell asleep and you're coming. This was all a dream. - Oh my god, that is so funny. - How are the dreams? - That is so funny. - Dude, remember when we threw the buckets of come on you guys, but then I think we cut it out of the episode, but there were buckets. - Yeah, we didn't pass. - What's that called? - Standards and practices. - Yeah, right, right. - Yeah, because 30 comes a loop. (laughing) Yeah, we got bullet timed with buckets of fake semen and it was graphic. - Oh my god. - It was blast. It was like a horse blast, right? - Yeah, it was, they were big. It was like a big pressurized gun. - Did we shot it? - We shot it with the leaded scenes, isn't it? Am I crazy? - Yeah, I feel like I saw it, I think I saw it recently on that account. - That's right. - Yeah, maybe. Well, if you have the DVD and you've got the footage uploaded to Instagram. - And you've got the time? Go ahead and check it out. - If you got the time, check it out. - And the tech know how. That's something I'm losing. (laughing) - That's the exact thing came on when I was working at the, when I was teaching at a school that will remain unnamed, but I used to have to plug in. - We all know. - I used to have to plug into the projector. - I mean, let's be honest. - I would plug in just to open it up. - And one. - It's the greatest fear of teachers, right? - Dude, it fucking happened. - Oh yeah, that's great. - You put your laptop on, you got the projector going. going, you just prayed a God above that you didn't leave a fucking porno tab. Oh, God, so embarrassing. But it happens, brother. So embarrassing. And it's like, well, all right, what's next? All right, who did that? Who did their homework? When did that? When you were teaching there, you are also like their age. So they would get it, I feel like it would be weirder if you were like, yeah, Adam's right, you got to let it ride. What's the whole clip? Right. Yeah, just be like, you did this. I think it's an easier pill to swallow. If you're a swallow, if you were just like, like, sorry, you know, I'm also your age, obviously, I'm cranking down. Adam, you're taking so much time on a thing that you just you sweep to the side and just move on. You're like, okay, so obviously, we all saw the porno is on my computer. I would just like, let's talk about this for a while. I do 15. You know, humans have urges, okay? Raise your hand if you have an urge. No, let's talk about it. Dude, this is an editing class. I don't give a fuck. Do you guys know what pods are? P. A. W. G. That asked white girl. You know what? You know what? This is a good way to learn how to edit porno. This is huge. The compression rate on this. Well, well, it's a stream. So well, with Chris watching the scene, I want, look at the cuts here. Okay. This is a gonzo, this is gonzo porno. And it's a good example of when not to cut when you're, and not really what blacks, you're about to be. Hold it. Hold it. And actually, editing here, watch the editing. Hold it. This is a shot. This come shot was hour later. This is what we call a compilation. It's just like a montage. It's many clips cut together. It's really, it's really choppy. Yeah, that's what you got to do. It's the most bang for your buck. You lean into your skill. This is open on purpose today. We're talking about montages. This is called a compilation version of montages. And I know what you're thinking. I got caught. Nope. This is on purpose. Nope. Just double this is on purpose. And we are investigating how they cut this film. Okay. And there is the Dean of the school. Hold on one second. This is secret class. Let's turn it off. Let's go back to the regular. He's going to want to see this. Okay. We've got a minute of them all dancing in bikinis. And we cut to a minute of them disroping. Now we got another very, very kinky clip. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I could have gone with something a little soft core. I went wildly, wildly hard core gaping buttles. Okay. And I close that tab and there's another one. Okay. How many tabs? Who did who did the second tab? Can anybody tell me how many lights that they're using to light this at here? Zero. That's right. No last right. This is more along the lines of the dogma filmmakers of the 1995, which segues the Lars von Trier. No. Porto or art? Speaking of dogma, this clip, this is dogfarts.com. Okay. Yeah. But I'm 69. Wait, what was it? Dogmas 69. The place we would hang out wherever there was a permission wall, which is where like the company or the business would let you paint graffiti on the back of their business. What? That's some shy town. So shout out to Dave's Italian kitchen. Okay. We would just go there smoke weed. Big shout out to Dave. Some people would be like putting up a piece of graffiti. And we would just watch. And people would be like doing skateboard tricks that they couldn't land. And that's the best kind of just like hanging out. Just flipping tricks. Nobody sticks and being like and like trading CDs and full clan shit, dude. Yeah, exactly. And the interest now just hang out at like Starbucks, right? Like that's where you hang out on the internet on Call of Duty. Yeah, it's all digital. Metaverse. Metaverse probably. Yeah. I mean, we're not far off. Yeah, I think they do hang out, but they they have to see each other in person, because they got to get the like hand jobs and stuff. And you know, finger banks. I don't think they care. I think they'd rather beat off at home the way they can. What? Then just have their friends because they all got the Oculus Rifts. And it's it's too good. It's got to be so. Well, I don't know. Can you do that? Can you oculates yourself? What do you mean? Well, I'm saying talking to each other. Oh, sure. Can you see yourself, though? Yeah, you can you can have a avatar. Can't you? Yeah, you can. Like when you're hanging, you're beating off to a fucking sonic badge, all character. Yeah, exactly. But it's not the same. I wonder if it'll be like where you're you're fucking each other. Like if you have a girl and you're like, you know what? It's too big of a hassle to get in a car and drive over there. And it's like it too much of a thing. If you guys could just both put on your Oculus and it's it's sort of like that scene in demolition man, where it's just like sensual sensory overload. She would love this go. I wonder. I think we're on the we're on the verge. I mean, that's possible, right? Yeah, that's possible. That's absolutely possible. The tech is there because they're doing things like they're doing things where you can wear a sleeve. And then your doctor is like checking on how you're doing physical therapy. Like say you have a fucked up knee or something like that. You can put a sleeve on. And then so if you just put if you just put that on your day, it's science. I, by the way, I love how they're like the people who made it like, yeah, we invented this for doctors. And they're just waiting for porno to pick it up. Oh, because porno is the front of tech. There's then it is just around the river band. So doctors, this is for you. Whatever else is out there. I don't know. Yeah, porno. Yes, tech. Right. Cutting on it. And it's for doctors. Now, it's science. Anyone else wants to get involved? Anybody at all? Maybe browsers? I'm not really sure what else it could be used for doctors, browsers. Whoever. You know, doctors really need to grip things and. Please, you know, it's crazy. Like, you know, the tanga egg was originally like a disposal or something. Like, yeah, you, you just throw away the thing into here, you tie it up. And then something was like, you can stick your dick and it's a portable garbage bag. It can expand. You could jerk off into this egg. If you ever get sea sick while on a boat, you just open this little egg. It's a contraption for you. Breathe into it. Or I'll push your dick. And then some, some lonely sailor was like, wait a minute. Thank you, guys. Wild stuff. Some lonely sailor or any man. Do I make you hony, buddy? I like that that it only took us 30 or so minutes to get into porno on this episode. We really, that's maybe the longest one that we've had. Yeah, I'm proud of us. That's episode really proud of us, proud. It's a podcast. I know there's a lot of them to listen to these days. I swear. I know, bold. And how nice they were or if we tip them or not, come and find out. Trust me. Or maybe we'll talk about music and what's happening in the underground or drama and music or TV shows or the Med Gala and what the actors wore. Listen out of character from Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Pods, or wherever you get your podcasts. You broke me. I'm Andrea Gunning. Carl thought he was living a normal drama free life until the messages started. For nine months, someone infiltrated every aspect of Carl's life threatening to ruin him. Cyber stalking, swatting, extortion, impersonation. Listen to betrayal season six on the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, everybody. I'm Chuck Bryant at the stuff you should know podcast. And I'm Adam Pranaka of the greatest generation and greatest trick. We decided to start a golf comedy podcast because we're both big golf lovers. And we wanted to spread that joy. And it's called three putt bogey. It's coming from the perspective of golfers who are sometimes good enough to hit two great chats in a row, but almost never good enough to hit three. Obviously, we're going to talk a lot about the game of golf, how absurd it is and how fun it is and how vexing and frustrating. We love it anyway. This is a show. about sharing our experiences on the golf course and how absurd and funny they can be. And that's what 3Pot Bogey is. - It's 3Pot Bogey, everybody, out every Friday. You can listen to it now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. - This is Darrell Bell. - And I'm Cadeem Harrison. - And together, we're the voices behind the newest podcast on the Black Effect podcast network, a different world view with Darrell and Cadeem. - We're sharing never before heard stories from behind the scenes and sitting down with other stars from the show to hear their unique perspectives. - We're also discussing the arts world and pop culture headlines with plenty of laughs along the way. - We did a movie called School Days and Me Bein. - A train, you get the first shot. - And I hit the train back, you know what I mean? - And Me Bein, the dude that said, "Hey, spike on the street you saw him and coming out of the bathroom with something today, spike coming out of the bathroom." - I made that up. - So don't miss the start of something great. - Listen to a different world view with Darrell and Cadeem every Thursday, from the Black Effect podcast network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. - Evil, they were bad, bad people. - As bad as evil. - Yes, definitely. - That's a clip from our newest hit podcast, Royal Swindle, about two Australian lovers who conned their way through British high society. - In 1996, they arrived in London and won over wealthy businessmen, England's horse loving elite, and even the queen, all while conning people out of their fortunes. - This short lady comes in who barely see over the counter. (laughs) Everything about a screened, I'm not an international banker. - It's a story of love, lies, and yes, horses told in part by one of the women who lived it. - Oh look, I would say I'm the re-story, but whether I've made you know that, I don't know you. (laughs) - From USU Audio, Blanchard House, and exactly right media, this is Royal Swindle. - Listen to Royal Swindle on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. - Goodbye. - Goodbye. - Okay, five years, you wanna know what I'm going pro at, finger boarding. (laughs) - Where is this going, finger boarding? - It's finger boarding, maybe tech decks. Get me sponsored, I bet I could get paid five years from now. Do they still have tournaments? - You could get paid by tech decks right now, Blake. - Yeah, the fact that you just mentioned tech decks, - Right, you made five-buttony tech. - They're sending you a check. - That's why we were all pro. - I just made five dollars and got 10 tech decks sent to my house off just mentioning it. - By the way, the fact that you think you could get there, should you show no respect for these people who are so good at flipping little skateboards with their fingers? - No, it's actually really hard. - Tech-teching is super hard, it's hard. - It's really hard. - That's a thing. - By the way, the level of respect, Ders thinks that we need to give to tech deck pros as a pickleballer, I love what Ders is saying. - I've been there, I've been to five years. As someone who, like I devoted, I devoted my young life to swimming and got to a certain level. - But that's a sport. - Yeah, it doesn't need to be a sport. - That requires so much more. - Oh, I love what Ders is doing. - I'm talking about something, I'm talking about something. I dedicated myself. - Sure, sure. - I got to a certain level after, however many fucking hours, like, whatever kind of specific physical things that gave me any kind of advantage or whatever, there were still people that were so much more elite than me. And I took 15 or whatever, 20 years. - But you could go pro in beer chugging or. - But now you're talking about, so my kid just got the Guinness Book of World Records. And as we all love that book. - It was really cool. - It was like, longest hair, longest fingernails, fattest twins, fattest cow, it's like. - Biggest fattest cow, most gaping bubble. - Not in there, not in there. - Longest, now it's like longest underwater juggling fucking whatever, and you're like, that's not a thing. - Yeah. - Yeah, it's too specific. - And so what you're talking about is, yeah, I could be the world's best - Beer chugger. - Balance on one leg or. - Key dropped to other hander. (laughing) - I'm a man. - I could do this. I could do this for years. - Well, you have to be able to go pro. There has to be like, you get to a certain point and you get paid for it. - Hey, Mercedes, get at me. Tech-Jack, presenting the new electric Mercedes Anders Holm Key dropped, well, say no more. He's the best key dropper in the world that we've ever seen. - From one hand to the other hander. You wanted to do it? Okay, I'm here, I'll do it. (laughing) - What if I picked up archery? Do you think it's the first time I picked up a bow and arrow? - Gina Davis, you know, Gina Davis was the Olympics for archery. - Yeah, totally. - Got what a baby. - And I got a bow and arrow over pandemic. - You got a bow and arrow over what? (laughing) - Got to commercial. - And you were, she was a drummer. - From out of boner. - Kyle, you were like a natural. So I'm like, if this dude worked on it every day for the next five years, maybe Kyle, like he was born to be an archer. - I think I could, for skit shooting, I think I could go pro skit shooting. - Go pro being a shooter. - Okay. - In five years. I'm a very good, naturally I'm a very good shot. I just don't go enough. I think if I did it every day, I could be very good. That's cool. - Yeah. That's a good one. - Professional level. - Not the best. - Okay, so here's, I guess here's the thing. What do you think you couldn't do if you have five years in every day? - Oh, so, man, I keep hearing these things. I'm like, I could do this, I could do that. - Anything athletic, anything athletic. Like I don't think, like I'm too old at this point. Like my body won't get to the level. Like I won't be a professional basketball player or whatever. - But like shuffleboard, you could do darts, you could do, foosball, you could do pool. - No, I suck, I'm not naturally good at darts. So, no, I don't think I would be. - Okay, what about pool? - I'm not that good at pool. - Yeah. - So, no. But foosball, I have a base that I know that I'm starting off already far enough ahead that I think in five years, if I really dedicated myself, I could. - Right. Didn't some homies do this with curling where they were like, we wanna go to the Olympics, what sport do we think we have the best chance in? And they started doing curling and they actually made it to the Olympics? - Made it or like, or went to trials or whatever? - I think that was bobsledding. I think it was Jamaica. - Yeah. It was cool running. - This is still making bobsled to you. - No, you're right, 'cause curling is probably a pretty like-- - That's the most easy access, I would say. And the fact that-- - Especially if you're from a country like, Canada. - Well, no, that's very hard. - Yeah. - Oh, yeah. - It's not like Mexico or-- - If you're in Mexico. - Yeah. - I gotta know Jamaica. You know, Jamaica or something. - Do it, but dumbass. - If you're from like, Republic of Congo or fucking, where they're like, no one's doing it, you're like, right, should make him team, you know? - I don't know, some are where it's easy, like the coldest country in North America, unreal. (dramatic music) - Dude, remember Adam, we also did that fucking weird ass sketch comedy thing that was called 72 Virgins. And it was about these two like, frat bros. - Yeah. - Who basically go to what they think is a frat, but it's a sleeper cell for terrorists. - I'm laughing, right? - And they like, convince us. And it went on like CNN and shit. - Yes. - It was very viral. - It made some noise. - Dredge report or whatever. - Yeah, it was crazy. And it was just like, we were just, I don't know, just fucking saying yes to whatever, but it was just weird. - It was a funny, at least a funny conceit. - I mean, we spent a whole summer. We spent a whole entire summer working on the fucking live show. It was like a summer of our lives. And we got paid like 300 bucks. - We said we got paid in gum and shit. - Not my fault, not my fault. - We got paid in gum. We talked about it. - Not my fault. - Yeah. - Oh yeah, right, right, right. - No energy. - Go girl energy. - Yeah, yeah, that's right. - So that being said, I think maybe, I don't know if you would have tickled each other, but we did do some things that I look back and I'm like, yeah, buddy. - I mean, I talked to my dick between my legs on stage. That's as close to tickling another person as I was getting. - Yeah, you did. - I mean, I've showed my butt hole in game over, man. So we've all done things. - So what are we talking about here? - I'm actually proud of that, but. - You're proud of that, but? - Yeah, do your stuff. - Do your sucked on my titty. - Yeah. - Yes, we all do things. - Goodbye. - And by the way, Kyle Blackmail me about it. - I did, I did. - What the fuck? - Sorry about that. - Whoopsie. - What, air that out? - It happens, man. - Oh, and then, and then the issue was was, - And then? - More. - It came out, like, they held on to the movie for years. - What movie? - Are we talking about the 72 virgins? - 'Cause that was just a tray rack. - No, I forget, I think it was Ratco, the dictator's son. - Okay. - And then they held onto that forever. And then it came out, like, right as Workaholics was coming out. - Yeah, that's right. - And then they were pairing Ratco, the dictator's son with Workaholics episodes. - On Comedy Central? - Like, on Comedy Central. - By the way, the main character in Ratco is Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite. I don't know the actors. - Oh, yes, Efren Ramirez, I believe it is. - Yes, but he was the main, he's Ratco. - That's true. - I don't think I've ever watched the movie, but maybe it's funny, it's probably highly offensive. - I bet there's a chance that you would think it's funny in a way that you like bad stuff, you know what I mean? Dude, Comedy is offensive. - Don't wanna make it. - Blake made his favorite type of movie. - Yeah. - Yeah, and he hasn't even watched it. Objectively bad. - I don't know. I don't know if I have the patience for it anymore. I don't know if I could sit down and, just watch Ratco. Yeah, you're always so busy like doing stuff. I am, man. You got to be crazy not watching stuff like not always watching stuff. Yeah, I listen to pods now, man, I don't watch a little time. Bitch name five podcasts you listen to. I don't want to. I don't want to. I don't want to. I'm not trying to get free. Besides this one, I'm not trying to get free press. I know it's been a long ways out, but it's never too late to give somebody their flowers. Bob Saggit. What a great TV dad and RIP to a fucking goat, man. Dude. Yeah. Yeah. Full house. What a run. That show is this shit. Yeah. You know what I had I had forgotten that he was the voice of how I met your mother. He was like the telling the story guy. Oh, really? Yeah. The narrator. He's got. Yeah. That's the term. I work in the business. Yeah, it is full house paper, right? Stacked it. Then he had his, um, AFV. America's, yeah. Oh, yeah. Fun every time videos paper, right? Stacked that. But then I was like, where's his recent paper from? Is it just doing standup? And then I remembered he was the voice of like the storyteller on how I met your mother. And all those shows you just named that money stacked, stacked high. And did you know like Guillermo del Toro was a co-owner of how I met your mother. So I will give him. Oh, where are the producers on that? They're not trying to call you out. Well, you know, Bob Saggit, that's a San Francisco legend, right? They're real Bay Area legend. Dude. Is he? Did he go to the same high school as you or not? No, I think it was just the fact that full house took place in San Francisco and like it's kind of a place you can go and see the house. Yeah, it's just. Yeah, dude. Full house had like rice errone jokes. Yeah. Yeah. And he was like constantly wearing like warriors jerseys before it was fucking Steph Curry splash bro hours. He's wearing like joy and cheer. Yeah. So, you know, his, his status is he's, he's, he's a legend in the Bay. That's for sure. I like to think that if we were cast on that show, like it would have worked out pretty good. Oh, dude, for days. Yeah, it would have, yeah, for sure. I'm trying to think like would I be, would I be Saggit? Yes. Um, and would Adam be Uncle Jesse? Adam is Uncle Jesse. I was playing Uncle Jesse. Fucking Dave Cuyet, man. I feel like I know, but Blake seems like way more of a Uncle Joey Dave Cuyet type or is Adam that? I don't know. I guess you know what? I'm fucking with something sacred. No, it's okay. It's okay to live in the multi. Well, that's the thing because what? Well, you have to think about, you have to think about it. Or is Adam Saggit? And I'm Jesse and Blake is Cuyet. I don't think it's, I don't think it's. Because like the, the main thing like their characteristics is like Joey, it was hecka silly. Right. Immediately and dude. Right. Yes. Always gave a laugh to the kids. But Jesse was, Jesse was a playboy. But he was in a band and getting, getting, getting some head. Yeah, he was, hey, I'll be right back. I'm getting head. Yeah, he was always getting ahead. They didn't really explore that, but that bro was getting domed up in the car because he wasn't doing it at the house. You missed that episode. Yeah. He wasn't doing it at that. He was personally getting tickets at the park. It's a full house, bro. Where is Uncle Jesse getting domed up? He's in the car on the San Francisco streets, bro. Uncle Jesse has the most log car blow jobs in television history. He's in Golden Gate Park. Anna says he was getting it in the attic. That's right. They had an attic. Oh, yeah. Well he lived in the house. It's like, do not go in the attic. No, no, he had comment. He had a comment waiting. He would leave comment at the door. And whenever we start scratching the door, he'd be like, get your fucking clothes. I get your clothes on. Get your clothes on. You gotta go. Jimmy's here. Jimmy Ghibler, Jimmy Ghibler. Jimmy Ghibler. Jimmy Ghibler's like, no. Her comedic sensibility was off the Richter scale. Where are they now? She came back to him and then she came back to it and slayed. I watched the reboot pilot. And she was on the point. Still coming in. Jimmy Ghibler was still still had it. She was giggling. But did she, did she do any, so you're saying she went out the business and then came back because they were like, hey, do you want to make this one just $1,000 a week or 50 that whatever the fuck it was. No, I'm just like, I'm like, just to hit him with some gibbles. It's so cool. Like she was like made for that role and that role. It's dust off your jean jacket with the fringe. It's like, baby. I'm gonna hit the ball. Keri, we're, if you want to come back and make 20 grand an episode, she goes, I'm loving it. And just hit him. She still got the. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, boy. And you're known that she clicked right into the Zoom call. Oh, let me think about that for a second. Let me gibble. Oh, I gotta do a gibble. Oh, yeah. I think I'm gonna be gibbling. She heard the rumblings about the reboot. She was waiting by the phone. Ready to gibble. I'm drooling. And you know, oh yeah, Kurt Cameron's sister. What's her name? So, Kurt, whatever, Cameron, uh, Candace Cameron. Candace Cameron. That's what she was like. I got to get up stage by this chick again. Dude, give me gibble. She came in like, her cold. She came in like, her cold and just stole the show. Yeah, she did. Give me gibble or shout out to all the Kimlie gibble or stand. Did I ever tell you guys about the time I was caught? I don't know. I might have told this story on the podcast. I'm not sure, but I was caught jerking off by my mom and in the basement and I'm a senior in high school and you enter through my garage and you go right into the basement. It's an old computer. It takes forever to like download or upload porn notes via the sublime directory and there were so many pop-ups and so there's just like a hundred pop-ups to pop up and I hear the garage door coming up and I'm trying to is this the yeah, yeah, and I'm trying to click out of it quickly. Yeah, I jump on the couch. She comes in and my mom looks at the computer and she goes, my mom's pretty chill. She's like, Jesus, you disgust me sexy sibling. Yeah, you disgust me. Yes. And then I go upstairs and why did she say? Your boobs are huge because what a Britney had seen this. I did, I did tell her. I didn't tell it. It's a classic. It was like hot brother on sister action and it was two siblings fucking which is a weird. It's a weird pop-up. Why is that a pop-up? It really pisses me off. It doesn't piss you guys off that like that's so prevalent. Are we talking about this? We can't think that's commercial. Yeah, well, but it's step, right? It's step. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's still, it's like, what, allegedly, it's not, I mean, I'm not I'm not justifying it. I'm not justifying it. I'm just saying it's loud too. It's a reaching your steps like sister or whatever. You're like, hey, probably have been around them for most of your life and now you want to fuck them. That's gross. Guys, let's not bury the the freaking headline here. You know what started it all. What? Do you guys remember the movie Clueless? The whole movie is about Paul Rudd being her step brother and at least just Silverstone wants to bone him. No, he works at the dad's law firm. No, they're they're step people together brother and sister siblings. I don't think so. I don't really remember that movie. Well, but you're forgetting, you're forgetting the Brady bunch. Wait, what happened in that one? Oh, we that's true. We're all forgetting the Brady bunch. Yeah. If your TV breaks now, do you get a TV repairman? Is that even a job anymore? Or you just buy a new can't be right? You just buy a new TV. I was thinking of that the other day. I was like, if this TV were to break, I would just buy a new TV. I wouldn't even there's I remember specifically on multiple occasions a TV repairman right coming to the house. I remember our VCR breaking, right? My dad took it to the VCR repairman. Right. I'm like, that doesn't fucking exist anymore. Well, because a lot of the times for old TVs, there was a bulb in there. Correct. So like, if the bulb was all fucked up, you had to like, open it up and replace that. And then VHS, sometimes the tape would get caught. So you'd have to take it somewhere to get it out. Yep. Or you'd have to he'd have to clean the heads. Remember that shit? Right. Fuck it. Did you guys have the the little red sports car that would rewind the tapes for? Yes, I did. Oh, yeah, baby. That must be the glass elevator generation, because I don't know what the fuck you're talking about home, boy. You didn't have a rewinder? No, fuck no. It was a specific machine to rewind. Yeah. So you didn't fuck your heads up on your VCR. No, it would go hella fast and then slow down towards the end. So it didn't. So sick. I did not have that was a luxury. Oh, come on. It looks like a little red sports car. Yeah. Yeah, sports. Baby, everyone so fast. Oh, wow. Yeah. Wow. God damn. That was a luxury. We didn't have that in my home. At Adam's wedding, we were talking about something. Your brother was the all-star, by the way. I'll give him your brother. Cause you not hear about you. Kyle, you heard about this, right? Your brother comes up and he He goes, when you're talking about something, he goes, "I mean, shit, my brother, I always looked up to him." He had the world record for Pogo. - He said, "I had it." - And I go, "What?" Yeah, he said, "You had it." And I go, "I don't remember what this is." - When, I go, "When we were kids." And I go, "How old?" And he was like, he was like 12, and I was like, nine or eight or whatever. And I go, "Kyle had the world record for Pogo sticking at 12." He goes, "Is it real?" I go, "No, he didn't." And he goes, "Yeah, no." He like, he like, "Slept leaning up against the wall." The whole thing was that you just couldn't get off the stick. And I go, "Adam, newichek, baby nooch." Your brother lied to you when you were super young and impressionable, and you've caught this your whole life. And he goes, "No, it's impossible." I go, "Think about it." He slept leaning up against a wall on a Pogo stick. And his face fell off. - Oh, what a sweet man. - And he was like, "I got a textbook." - That was from the tequila, right? - Yeah, I think, I don't know something, but he's a storyteller, man. There's been plenty of-- - No, he's a story believer. - You're a liar. - There's plenty, no, but he also does a lot of like, filling in blanks to make it awesome in his mind. - Big fishes, he big fishes, you know? - Yeah, it's big fish. Big fish is like what? That was like our family movie. Like when that movie came out, we all looked at each other and were like, "That movie fucking rocks." - Worst movie. - Because it's all about tall tail. - I love big fish too. - I saw it twice in the theater, dude. - That movie-- - That movie rocked. - So bad. - Yeah, that movie kicked butt, dude. That's one of my favorite movies of all time. - I didn't recall liking it. - It's a bad movie. - It's a fantastic movie. - No, it rules. And also it didn't come out when we were kids. We were adults. - Utterly forgettable. - Absolutely memorable and just like, you know, touching. - There was a big fish, I believe you. There was a big fish at the end. There was a truth to it. And there was truth to all the characters as well. But the fabric in between all of that was made up, you know, embellished, if you will. - Okay, so we think, however you need to explain it. - So we think he made this story up about you being this Pogo Pro. - I think he knows that I wanted it when I was eight years old and we were in Korea. - Or do we think that you might have told him this story when you were really young? And he put that little kernel back here and was like. - No, we're only two years apart. That's not happening. - Then he's an idiot and found out how dumb he was. - No, he's just plays. He just plays in reality. What's, he's just playful. - Dude, his heart broke when I was like, think about this. - No, it didn't. He was drunk. He was acting, bro. Trust. I guarantee this. - No. - He played you in that moment. - Oh shit. - I can't see this. - Oh my god. - Oh my god. - It's the fucking biggest reveal. - Oh shit. - You got a big fish. - You got new checks, bro. And that's why you don't like the movie motherfucker. - He'll take it all. - You just got new checks. - It's the newest punk you might get new checks. - In this universe you guys are creating? - My family, my family always says now, like don't ruin a good story with the truth. That's like what their shit is. - Oh god. - That's bad dude. - No, I know, I know it's not a great place to live, but that is something that is a-- - It's going around the family. - Your family says this? - It happens. - Yeah. - Who? At what point? Like when? - My mom says that. - When is she saying? Like when was that, where you're like laying in bed and she was reading your stories and she was like, you know, speaking of stories. Whenever you're telling a good story and you kind of embellish a little bit and then somebody calls the other person out, then you're like, hey man, let me tell my fucking story. That's basically what it is. You know what I mean? There's no reason for you to cut in front. This is a ride. - Hey, and Kyle, I agree with that. I love that about your family. I think that's fun. - I'm creating a ride for the people who are listening right now. - Yeah, that's fun. - Yeah, but when I hear your story, I go, that's a lie. Like when I hear Adam tell a story and I'm like, I was there. It wasn't that crazy. - But guess what story you just told, and then like, you know, it keeps going. - Yes, that was fun though. - It's cool. - Yeah, it does keep going. Like how when you're sitting watching big fish and you're like, is this over? No, just it keeps going. - Shut up, bitch! - That's weird. Why don't you like that movie? - That's a trip in a house. - I gotta watch it again. - I thought it was stupid. - Woo! - Yeah, no, I got that. I get all of those adjectives, but what's that? - I thought it was like, I didn't like the tone. - What happened to you? - What is it? No, what is it? - I didn't like the tone at all. - The tone of magic, like fairy tale? - They're like, I'm a guy going from town to town. Oh, you're tall. - Oh, I remember a tall guy. - It's a Tim Burton movie. - It's you and McGregor. - Yeah. - You and McGregor, Albert Finney, Billy Crutup. - Finney Killzer. - Jessica Lang. - Crutup Killzer. - You so, do you not fuck with Tim? - Hi. - I mean, that's a good impression. - I fuck with Tim Burton hard, bro. - That is one of the worst Tim Burton movies, for sure. - It's a departure, but what, you like big eyes better than that? - I'm sorry? - I think like big eyes better than that one. - What's that? - I don't even know big eyes as big eyes. - Fuck it. - It's another Burton departure, man. - Oh, so you're lumping big fish with big eyes. - We're talking departures. - No, I'm just saying it's a departure from his regular tone. Like, this was a-- - I don't think it was that big of a departure. It seems like-- - No, he's goth and dark. - Normally, he's very much more macabre than that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a macabre storyteller. - I get what he's saying. - Macabre? - Yeah. - Abra macabre. - It's macabre. - When somebody does something bad, just calling it a departure is kind of a cool way to put it in. - It's a departure. - Yeah, it's fully excused. - That's not what I'm saying, though. That's not what I'm saying. - No, I know, I know. Tim Barton has a very specific tone and look. (laughing) - But it is cool to say departure has like a-- - Tom Barton, Tom Barton, yes. - Yes. - Who said Tim Barton? - Blake. - But listen. - The fact that I'm 100% always the one to say word's wrong. The fact that Blake just said it, so pumped, dude. - Tim Barton, I loved Tim Barton and I was so pumped to go into that movie. And then when it took its departure to a bad movie land, I was like, no, you're out of your mind, bro. - Now arriving bad movie. - Now arriving bad movie land by the departure. - Yes. - That's what you felt betrayed. 'Cause it's not a bad movie. - Edward says his hands is my top 10 probably. - Yeah, that's great. - I love that movie. - That movie rules. - It's fantastic. - So you felt betrayed. Do you like a certain flavor? - Phoebe's Big Adventure, both of his Batman's. - Yeah. - I like a certain flavor. - Yeah, don't change the flavor. - Yeah. - Don't change your Burton flavor. You want that to stick. - You want that black licorice marshmallow cucumber. - That sugar watermelon. - Marshmallow, baby. Cotton candy marshmallow. - Yeah. - You must have been eyeing that beer pong table. - I am. - Just going on the leg of our house. - Oh yeah. - No bro, I was probably drinking on some jungle juice, dude. Just a barrel of like a bunch of mixture and give it a seed. - No, this is when we lived in the dinosaur house. This is a post jungle juice era. - Okay, okay, got you. - I remember when we used to fuck up jungle juice and that was a very nice. - We too, in big ass tubs bro. We used to do it in garbage cans. - Yeah, garbage cans. - I remember you, I remember very clearly. You addressed as a treasure troll. - I was dressed as a treasure troll as a Halloween party. - Yeah. - A stirring jungle juice with a fucking two by four. - Oh, that's boss. - It was. - Yeah, with a two by four that we found outside. It was gross. - It was dope. - That's life. - It's fucking dope. - Only because I had been to Fred houses and I'd seen how they make jungle juice and I'm like, yeah, it's just a ton of shit. We'll just do it like that. And then also our parties. There's only like 20 people there. - You know what I mean? - It wasn't like a Fred party where there's like 200 people there to drink this. - I know. - It was like 15 to 20. - 20 of us. - And then of course you turn it into like a challenge. It's like we gotta finish this. - Yeah, we're like, we're finishing this. - Why? - And it was just like every type of alcohol we possibly could. - Well dude, do you remember after that shit, Teddy, friend of the show, put the fucking shit into like, like jars, like Tupperware and put it in the fridge and see if you can. - He was finishing it. - He was like a fine guy. - Oh yeah. - So we took the jungle juice out of the trash can, put it in the fridge and then that became the challenge for the next like fucking year. Like they were like in our kitchen fridge. - To drink it for the next year? - Yeah. - It was like who wants to go after the jungle juice? Like let's do it. - It's some breakfast J.J. - But does it go bad? - I don't know, it's in the fridge. - No, it's pure alcohol. - I remember at that party, I remember at that party, I mixed two monster energy drinks mixed with vodka and beer bonked it. - Well, love. - And my heart almost exploded. I remember immediately, like it's on that last gulp was like, and that was the worst idea I've ever had in my life. - Goodbye. - How fun was it to be around you after that? - Du, du, du, du, du, du, du, du, du, du. - That was my heartbeat. - No, it was so scary. - So scary. - Yeah. - It's like he's gonna die. - He's gonna die. - Oh, this is a funky beat. - He just turned into human jungle music. - Dude, it's terrible. - Are there any take backs, apologies, giveaways? I would like to take back to ourselves in 19, 20, 21 year old cells for drinking that jungle juice. I feel like that was a poor decision and we probably took, I wish it was like a little tracker. - This is, now this is a good app. - Are you a tracker? - No, you just like kind of put in like what you're about to do and then that shows you how much time that's gonna take off your life, and you can go like that. - Oh shit, oh shit, this drinking this jungle juice will take like a week and a half off my life, maybe it's not worth it. - Or maybe it is. - Would you do anything? - What, like change his lifestyle? My bro's still gonna send it. - Or do you think it would be like now a contest where it's like, no, that only took five years off your life, watch this, I'm gonna take 10 years. - Posting, I'm gonna take 25. - That's what I'm saying. If we could walk up to each other and flash our app and show how many lifetime burritos we've ate, and then like just be like, yo dude, I'm like 20 ahead of you right now. (laughing) - Wait, like, do you have any tickets? - Yeah, here you are. - I do have, I wrote something down, Adam, I'm sorry I called you a scab. - Yeah, thank you. - I know you weren't, you were actually on the picket lines and you are a frickin' soldier for that, dude, and I respect you. - Well, thank you, thank you. - And if I were there, I would've took you to Russia, it would've been sick. - Dude, we would've been going to Russia, dude. - In several times. - Russia, we would've been living in Russia. - Russia. (laughing) - He had one of us have a stroke on the podcast. God, that'd be good. - That'd be good for ratings. - Yeah. - I heard before you have a stroke, you smell orange chicken. - I would be crying, dude. If I saw you go down, homie, I'd be like fucking, oh my god, like that would be-- - You'd be bombed. - I would be so much real bummed. - Who would be the most bombed? Do we think out of the four of us if I were to just doubt-- - The most bombed? - I guess if I can see your face while you were passed out, I think I would start crying. If I could see your face, like if you fell backwards and passed out, like that, and it was not moving, I think that would-- - Are we talking about who it was? - Are we talking about who would be the most bombed immediately, or like a week later, kind of smokes, sort of cleared, where some people are getting over it? (laughing) - What happened? - Like who stays the most bombed? - I think we're in a-- - No, I guess we're talking about like immediately, like who's the most bombed. - Kai. - I'm scared. - Yeah. - I'm scared out of my mind. - Kai, I'm scared out of my mind. - Okay, and that's another episode of-- - Oh wait! (laughing) - He's a bagel. - This is epic slam. (laughing) - What's happening? - Fire away, Mike Lee. - Fire away. (upbeat music) - See you next week. ♪ I'm gonna come back and see me ♪ ♪ Three days to live in room ♪ ♪ I really have a soulmate ♪ (upbeat music) - From Pushkin Industries, I'm Jonathan Goldstein and this season on Heavyweight. Jenna wonders why her foster family promised to adopt her, but then never did. - She said she is the Mrs. Jones and the famous song, "Me and Mrs. Jones." - Listen to Heavyweight on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. - Hey, it's J.O. from Laugh with me, the podcast. Why would you choose Laugh with me? Yeah, that's right. Other podcasts have host of broadcasts and degrees. Laugh with me as a survivor. Listen to Laugh with me, a podcast with Jeremy Odom on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. - This is an iHeart podcast, guaranteed human.