Best Of 2025

[Music] Well, how do you do? And Merry Christmas, Happy Kwanzaa, as well as all of your other holidays this season. It's Mariah time. And it is also time for some traditions. If you didn't know, I go by the name of Scrooge. I am Christal Jean and this is the Read Special Holiday Adusien. Yes. May all the baby. Oh, that's the Christmas. That's next week. All right. Next week. But now we have the present for you holiday girlies in the form of best of. Thank you. Once again, for providing some suggestions on our Instagram and other places for some of your favorite moments of the read this year. So without further ado, let's see what you picked. Dredging up our bad behave, yeah. Again. My favorite. Well, love this time of year. Love it for you. All right, let's get started. Hello. Thank you for calling the Lincoln Laney Dance Academy. We're now teaching night school courses on the Mamba as well as the Bankhead Bounce. And here we are. It's 2025. It is. Yes. Like this is the president of the United States. It's crazy. So like it's great. Like sweet about Taylor Swift. Is Sydney Sweeney? What the fuck? Why is the White House? Sydney Sweeney is a registered Republican. So I love her. I hate it. I hate it. I don't know about that bitch. I told you about that bitch. And like I said, I've been so parked in with my pringle and my tissue and my penny. And I've just been like, girl, mind you. I business when you said Sydney Sweeney was like. Oh, girl. Mamba from get out. Yes. I was like, we really. And now she's a Republican. A bit about the family. Now I was. But that. That had a lot. Yeah. Yeah. That had a lot. And then I had jeans I passed down from. I was in solo yesterday. And it was three black girls on the sidewalk in front of me. And it was an American eagle up there. And they had a Sydney Sweeney band around. And they started doing that. And I died. Jeans. I passed down from parent to child. Often determining things like air color and texture. And breath side. And how much better you are. And other races. Is that she's not. I mean, y'all couldn't pick nobody. Pretty. I do this. Like girl. Okay. So let's discuss. Because I wasn't going to say nothing. This one. But now we know. I wasn't going to say anything. Because the. The Republicans have been in the largest dizzy. Like the liberals, the, the Democrats. They just hate sexy and unspeakably white women. And I'm like. Oh. This one. Sydney Sweeney has large breasts. Like the thing is y'all have for so long. Diluted yourself and attempted to dilute the rest of the world. Into believing that white blonde blue eyed women are so beautiful. That y'all bitches just look at any blonde white woman and thing. Oh. It is not hard to be quote unquote pretty when you're white and blonde. Yes. When a lot. A lot of y'all are just white girls. Sydney Sweeney is not an unattractive person by any means. But jumping out the window and attempting to claim that bitches don't like the thing. Because she's just done. Fucking gorgeous. Then why was Barbie the biggest movie? Yeah. You know sexy fucking Margot Robbie. Now that's a gorgeous white. Yeah. But like. There are so many like that. I just feel like there are so many young girls genuinely beautiful. And I'm not seeing it for that one in particular. I don't know. Some about the eyes maybe. But I also tend to let y'all have it about white people. Because I'm not seeing which all are seeing any fucking way. But why is the White House and the president weighing in on fucking jeans? Why are you? Why is the White House posting about American Eagle? Because I wouldn't be surprised if people who sit in the chairs or the committee, people who own American Eagle. People who sit at the top of the top. Absolutely voted for him. Put money in pockets over there. It's very, very, very obvious that the ads are dog whistles. That's why. And the funny thing is race is biggest problem is people on the right can service be the loudest and first one to defend some shit when they get the sniff of somebody being on to the bullshit. And this is what y'all louder than the people who don't like the ad. Most people are just clowning it for being wet and racing. I would have never known if white people hadn't made it such a big deal. Like American Eagle ads have never been any of my business. I can't tell you what an American Eagle commercial look like. I would have this. It was the ridiculousness of the content of the ad and then the way y'all are acting like. This is bigger news than what Trump is doing as president like for Fox news to be spending hours dissecting this American Eagle story and not talking about the Epstein files. Or old girl Maxwell being downgraded to or upgraded I should say to a minimum security prison. Like Trump has been a part in her or something like there's the Republicans and their redistricting bullshit and and what the governor down there in Texas is threatening to do to all these lawmakers like there's actual things that are going on and this is what y'all are focusing on. And this is where a giant section of the country is getting their news. They tuned into this station all day every fucking day and following the president on his, you know, mega social media site that true social bullshit. This is what we dealing with. If I had a joke about truth, social that came to mind, I was using the right stream a couple weeks ago. All right, all right. It was pretty good. Okay. Did you see Cameron and Omar goodie? No doing what? Omar goodie has released not one but two disc records directed towards camera. Because Cameron went on his podcast where he was interviewing 50 cent and randomly shaded Omar goodie. What? Saying something like Omar goodie junior mind you Omar not a junior. They have to like wait for blah blah blah. Oh, he of course he did. He was like, or they have to wait for blah blah blah or is like, you know, or they have to, you know, hope something like 50 set will give them a chance. Some shit like that. It was like unnecessarily shady and it sounded like he was just fishing for black names. Omar decided to respond with, yeah, with rap music. Is it good? Is the song good? It's not bad. It's not as bad as you might think. Yeah. Oh, okay. Can he rap better than Cameron? If you want to get in the boot. That's right. That's right. I don't think I don't know how current day Cameron would fare against. Oh, wow. Okay. So he's really not bad. But I also wasn't he's not great. I was prepared for it to go either way. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? But why would some of it? I was like, okay, if it's ain't bad, then some of them are like, okay, that wasn't a very strong bar. I'm fine. You know, yeah. Why would Cameron bring him into this? Assume strange. That is the part I don't. I was like, for him to bring up Omar Gooding and say his name wrong. It feels incredibly random. For Omar Gooding to respond with two rap songs is also random. Is there something that we're missing? Maybe he meant you good getting Junior. Maybe he. You know, black people get names wrong all the time. All the time. It's true. But then like Cameron posted a photo of him from wild and crazy kids talking about this you. Like, okay. Okay. So everybody knows that. Is that bad? He also played peanut and baby boy and we and we bought it. Like he did well. He just respect Omar Gooding's career. What are you talking about? There's not no. Right. All right. See. Because now it feels like what was the reason? Like why and why egg it on when you brought that man's name up out of nowhere? You brought his name up. So I'm saying like why did you bring up? - Oh my goodness. - Y'all have some kind of beef? - Or did you mean cube-a-good-ing? - 'Cause I could give you a color reason to like-- - And then you got embarrassed. - It was probably not working as much. - Right. But, I mean, I would argue cube-a-good in juniors, far more successful than camera. So why would you-- - Maybe him at Mason. - All right. Niggas doing, niggas shit. You know, it looks like he's, if cube is from the Bronx then Omar probably is too. It looks like maybe eight, so-- - Omar's, I think it's from L.A. - So did they not grow up in the same house? - I don't know. Maybe by the time Omar came along, they were already on the way. - Perhaps so. - Or he grew up here. Maybe he was, I really don't know where he was born, but I think he claims the West. - No, he was indeed born it. No, he was born in L.A., you are correct. So, all right, while I was thinking maybe, you know, all they grew up around each other, not around Harlem and the Bronx. - Yeah, I'm next door, but okay, never mind. I don't have no explanation in. - I neither do I, I'm sorry. I don't know where this came from, why it came from. Where it's going, but it's there, it exists. - Oh, yeah, family moved to L.A. in 1972 when he was, when Cuba was four, so. All right, that clears that up. - Work out. But I'm also not going to go out, I'm not going to be on the lookout for whatever he has to say about this 'cause I don't care about it. - But I'm just saying, if you're expecting to hear music in response, which is what I was thinking too, you won't be able to, because camera and wrist. (laughing) I think under that picture of Wad and Crazy Kids, oh my, Cam says something like, I'm wrapping up vacation, I'm back in a pod, back on a pod next week or something, something like that. So it's not like he's going to address it on the podcast, to which Omar responds with a video of himself like in a pool like us with his kids or something, and he's like, nah, bro, that's not it, get in the booth. - Right, like right now. - Or shut your SS up essentially. - Cameron in Omar Gooding. - Not still, not still with this. - Mind you, Omar Gooding has released like five records. - Cameron has released zero. - This is still happening, no way. - Yeah, it's still going on. I think it's going to keep going on. - No way. - I've never been this more, like I'm so confused, I still don't understand why this is taking place. Like, what is the incentive? Because I know, like I said, Cameron had 50 Sun on the show. He was trying to gas 50 and say how 50 has kind of become a person similar to Tyler Perry in Hollywood where a lot of black actors who can get work anywhere rely on him for work, right? And he for whatever reason goes Ving Rames, like Omar Gooding Jr. like they, they see like dissing them. Omar Gooding well respected, you know, still working, successful, happy. Ving Rames just in mission impossible like last year, this year. So that was random. Omar was like, okay, fine, I'm gonna diss you. The records were pretty good. He's like getting the booth, let's argue. Cameron said, oh, I'm on vacation. I'll be back for the podcast soon. That was last I heard. I think Omar put another diss record on that. - Oh my God. So Cameron, now. (laughing) This is one of the craziest things I've ever, I want to just preface this. - What am I looking? - Are you seeing what took place? Okay, you are. (laughing) This is one of the craziest things I've ever, - Oh my God. - New York niggas are crazy. Okay. So. - Nice, I'm rollin' in. - Cameron claims that amidst all of this, Omar Gooding went to Miami 'cause he was booked for a film, auditioned, did all of this stuff, and laughed at Omar saying that the movie's never going to come out. And the reason he knows that is because Cameron himself is the one who booked him for this fake movie. And he knows all of those movie producers, everybody in those rooms, essentially set him up to come in there and audition, take his shirt off, do all of these things, and then Cameron plays the video of him watching the audition and laughing at him. - Wow. - I was like, okay, you spent money on this. He spent real money. He spent real money to put together an audition, a booking, a shoot, all of these things, just to be like a nigger. That movie you thought that you got booked for, it's not coming out. Well, you still got paid, you paid him. - Right. - And he made three, four disc records towards you. And now he's still laughing. He went and did another project after that one. And it's back in the studio. And you still, so it's like, cam, cam, killa. And someone who's been a dip set fan since I was like, nineth grade. I have to ask, it's going on. (laughs) What's going on? What? Who does all of this? - Why haven't you gotten in the booth? That man put out five songs, you're a rapper. He's not. I'm actually, this one, this one blows me over. - Yeah. 'Cause you went through all that trouble to set up like a fake green room or fake whatever. Like you went through all I can not believe what I'm looking at right now. - It's pretty crazy. - I don't get it. - It's beyond childish. - It's like a, it's a thing that I know. His type of niggas, his friends, like niggas, like they will think it's hilarious. But I have to ask. - Is there all such? - Why? Right. - Paying a nigga you hate, it's no way you can justify that making sense to me. Like it's no way you gonna come out looking like you won in that situation to me. 'Cause you gave that, you put money directly in that nigga pocket. You do it. The nigga who's currently clowning you. Like for, for what? - Like you didn't even get him to dress up like ginger mange. Or something like actually embarrassed me. - It'd be ginger mange. - I don't know, it's the first person to pay him a mind. (laughing) - I'm all people. - I don't know why. It's just the first person. - That would be funny. He went on an audition, so many actors audition. - Every day, like every single day. - That's working, do you work? - What do you do for work now? 'Cause it's clearly not rap. - It doesn't matter, do you know how many actors, not only audition, going to flutection. There are actors who film whole movies that don't come out. Look at the foot, the back girl. - It happens all the time, it happens all the time. - You're not, this is what I'm saying. - They continue to go on, they did their job. It's not their job to release the movie. It's not, so gave him a job. - You pay for his flight, hotel, whatever, like you. - I don't get, I don't understand. I genuinely watch this and I was like, yes, this is childish. Yes, this is petty, but I don't see the win. Like I didn't, I didn't look at things and be like, this is incredibly immature. This is petty, but it was really funny or I see how you got one up on your own. - Right, right, I don't with it. - I don't even see how you won. It looks like an L in so many different ways. On top of the fact that that man has put out three, four, five songs clowning you and you have not put out even one. - How do you like it about this? - So, camera's in, come on. - I'm our good thing. You think that as a checkmate, be careful. My inbox is full of grimy shit you've done, past and present, people really got it out for you. Seriously, be careful. Ain't nothing below over here. Can you book me into Tittoronto next? - Right, since you pan for niggas to go on vacation. (laughs) What are you doing? - So you said Jocelyn, he was gonna cook me on the mic. Best shot champion. - All right, seeing these Harlem niggas, I really need camera and fans to explain this to me. Like, how, 'cause I'm looking at his, I can't believe it, but-- - I'd love to, I am, man. I don't, I don't know. - Show me. - You have to ask a straight childish nigga, and I don't know where you-- - Well, I'm looking in the comments. I see Peter guns, so that lets me know already. - Girl, I mean, it's a chart. - Like, it's a chart. - No fight. - It's a chart. - No people really, what's funny about it? I don't know, okay. But you know what? It's kind of, I don't even know why, I'm just not making this connection. This all started with him in a conversation between 50 cent who is gassing up and covering in gold flakes. - 50 cent will totally do some stupid shit. - Yeah, yeah. But, honestly-- - And I would still be confused and be like, well-- - Y'all are childish, though. y'all have. very juvenile. Yeah, it's true for a lot of grown-ass people, men, especially. So, yeah, I just don't see how I just really don't, I don't, I really don't. You spent a coin and gave this man a job. And then the laugh was like, oh, he filmed it. It's not coming out. The movie's not coming out. Who gives a fuck? You flew me out and paid me for a prank. I guess you got me. Yeah, can you prank me in Toronto next? And then Jackson K goes after that. And then I'd like to go to the South of France. Bitch, Tom Holland will get a phone call from his agent like my movie ain't coming out. And then you just go and film something else. No one, I don't, I don't get it. And I am afraid. You see how, you see how regressive your mindset has to be to think that this was like, a good idea. And you was like really getting one over on that nigga. I know what I'll do. I'm looking for a job. See how embarrassing it is that you signed the paperwork and got mic'd up. What? No, it should have been something like maybe like, oh, you, you scheduled an audition for him. And when he pull up, it was just a parking lot for the kids dressed in a wild and crazy kids t-shirt. And they just throw the eggs at him. Right. Or did you even get something embarrassing on camera? Incredibly. I don't think so. So it's just they were laughing when he like, they're laughing. We took his shirt off and shit, but it's like, okay, you know, you know, God, turn off. God help me if I ever think that putting money in my ops pocket is the way to win a beef. It's never going to happen. Not the God. I know. My mind. No, not the same. My God, believe in common sense. We, we really, really are mad. We, we big on that. And I'm just not, this footage of you sipping tea watching this man audition is like, not watching him eat dog food out of a dixie cut. Not watching him like, and give him a job. But he's not doing anything to meaning or he just is doing his job as an actor. Is that embarrassing to you that, uh, that a working actor? What audition? Oh, baby. Uh, you know, I'm starting to feel like every time we talk about celebrities, the recurring theme is grow the fuck up with a lot of them. Yeah. Yeah. With a lot of them. I really thought last week, when you brought this up, it was going to be like, wow, what a crazy story. We'll never talk about that again. Me too. I want the rest of you camera and fans to step forward and explain to me, like I'm five years old. How does it make sense? Or even if you down in your petty soul have like an answer and inkling into how this is a W. Yeah. How this is a V. Bitch. Why? Is it just one you? You know, you've got to be the W. And we just get one of them you because I'm not seeing it. Listen, if you hate me, you can also book me the fly first class. Yes, please. And put me up for two to three days in some space. It's looking the open. And a check on top of that. Yeah, you actually can. You can go right ahead and book me for that. And I don't even have to do the work or feeling. I would love to see. I actually have a list of destinations across the planet. I would love to see. So if any of y'all just like, God, I hate Chris. What could I do? I know watching white lotus. And so I've always been. Let's pay her rent. We'll fly her to Thailand and pay her rent. And that'll show that bitch. We're stupid ass. Oh, yeah, my god. You don't even know that we just paid for her ass to be on a duck in Thailand and swim with the turtles and have vacation. I got footage of you signing the contract and getting miced up. Okay. And I was galloping around Thailand for three days and got paid. Oh, yeah, yeah. It was us. You can't be so penny and childish that you don't actually win the argument or the fight or whatever. Like you can't. If it was petty childish, funny. And you actually got one over on him, I would be saying something completely different. This just looks like a waste of time. It just made us time and money. She just made us. I'll book you for my god, daughter's baby shower next. Okay. And I'll be there. Long as that payment clear, I'll be there, girlie pot. Like what are we confused about? When are you going to get in the boat and respond to me on wax? Aren't you a rapper? Why is why is oh my goodness out wrapping you? I hate that. I hate I hate it. And I love oh my goodness. Y'all know smart guy with my favorite show. You know, I joke about baby boy all the time. I grew up watching the thing. But if you like Godfather, Harlem, you're going to love this cam set cam set the executive producer alongside me. Of course you want and get. I'm out of the country. Cameron posted it as well saying, you know, this will we be talking about for a few months now. It's almost time. Thanks for the opportunity. My nigga. We're going to burn the sugar. Okay. So maybe if Cameron is the EP, maybe it won't be so bad. Can't you feel that? Why do you feel? Well, Cameron won't even wrap back to Omar Gooding. Why do you feel like the way I push that completely out of my epoch episode? Well, because he was impatable. So I'm like, at least it's not just 50 said, you know, buying something and deciding to make it, you know, like a power 2.0. But all did he respond? Oh, it came on did respond. So you can respond today, but not to Omar Gooding. You really turned into a chatty patty damn. All right. I don't want to hear Tyler Perry until he responds to Omar Gooding in the booth. In the booth. Mo and Marcus. I'm so mad I forgot about that. You don't get to say shit else. Let me put out nine songs. Nine. You ain't put out one verse. Do it. How are you? Why? I'm so confused. Niggas grow and ask me in. Get offline. Y'all seeing Chloe out in these streets with Bernaboy? I said, oh, God, get my niece. Listen, it's something. It is something about African and Caribbean genitals. Dick, especially. Yeah. Did you see? I'm saying what I'm saying. What are you saying? I'm saying for that girl to be curled up hugging that Niggas knee like she was. That Nigerian dick doesn't center to the goddamn stratosphere. Bitch, why are you laying up? She looks like Laney laying up licking on this nigga. Leave me. Just happy to be there. Oh, that dick doesn't center into a whole other time and space. And I know it's something about y'all from those regions specifically because too many of my homegirls have been lost to Jamaican dick, Grenade and dick, Bayesian dick, Nigerian dick. I've been trying to tell y'all but she won't listen to me. Too many of my homegirls and got caught up. So when I saw Chloe grasping at that niggas joints, I said, oh, God, it's over for my sister. It's over for my niece. I know they did hit the spot and she woke up the next day and was like, did you know there are oceans on Saturn? I saw. I saw them. I saw with the orgasm you gave me on Saturn. I saw them on Saturn. And we should go. Let's go back. Let's go tonight. But not not sure. I feel like Chloe is T and God. What's his name? Burner Boy knows up in the air just to say, what is? Oh, yes. I've never me, me, myself, correct me. I've never seen Burner claim a single doll in a street. None of them. Every girl that I know that as dealt with Burner Boy, even mother fuckers, he was seriously dating for a year, step one. I'm like, I didn't know until after y'all broke up and you talked about it. You know what I mean? Like Chloe Bailey at the functions this nigga short list with. That's right. Let Chloe walk him. I agree his nose is wide open too, but I've seen my niece yesterday. I said oh she gone baby. I wanted it to be you know, oh, they just doing a song, you know, this is for the song. I wanted it to be that so bad child. No, yeah, they both sing it. Chloe in, they put that duck. So oh my goodness, Miss Tina, I, you look beautiful today. Thank you for being here. I want to thank you for having me. I haven't seen you guys since the launch. I want to ask about your best friend Johnny, and I loved reading more about him in this book, and you sharing a bit more of his story and talking about the experience of him. I just want to play basketball and how you stepped into the right frame as a best friend, it was like, yeah, I want to play basketball. And as Crystal mentioned, your mom put him onto, you know, making clothes and eventually he moved in with you and was basically just running the house and making dresses for the girls and stuff. And I guess like, I wanted to know how it feels or what the experience has been like to kind of commemorate that friendship have been sort of like immortalized your friend and have people, you know, get to really connect with, with this person, and it really feel impacted. Because as like a gay black man who has experienced a lot of those things and recognizes all those things is very touching. And it also really touched to be that his friend is, you know, putting his story out there and sharing, you know, the love that y'all had. Well, I mean, that's one of the best parts about this. You know, when we did that album and he got that recognition, oh my god, it was the happiest feeling and I know that he is, you know, up there in heaven playing his house music. He's got those awesome big famous, because he needs to tell me he was only famous. And I'd be like, okay, Johnny, okay, he prophesied that he manifested it. And she came out with that record. And then I will go to these concerts. And I had no idea that she had that picture at the end of the concert of me and him, because you know, they rushed me out of the concert. It was like so you're not waiting on you, right? You gotta go get in the car and I'm like, I'm staying out here tonight, because y'all haven't been in there. And it take like 10 minutes to get there. So I stayed and I saw that picture. Oh my god, I cried. And, you know, Johnny gave us that picture because Beyoncé called me, Beyoncé's office called me one day and they were like, we need a picture of Johnny. And I said, oh my god, I got to go and I'm going to a part. I was going to like a podcast. And I said, I don't have time because I have these four big things of pictures. And I went in there and I picked you up at the time. And I said, I don't know if they told me they wanted a picture of him. This one has me in it, but they could just crop me out of it. And so when I saw that picture up there, I was just so happy. And when I saw all these young people that reminded me of him, because I would stay at perfection. And I would say, oh my god, go get him. And he would come over and I would say, your outfit is fabulous. And they would have on these outfits that were, they look like what was on the stage. And I knew how much that cost and how long that takes. And we are doing this. And they would be like, me. And I was like, that's tiny. Like, it just, it was the best. And so now for me to follow that up with a book is just, I mean, he was my favorite person in the world. So it's like reliving those moments and it's so funny because I just finished, I had finished the audio book. And as many times as I read this book, I cried, you know, at the loss of him and my mom and my dad and my say, and all the people that I lost, it was, it never, it never, it never stops hurting that I lost him, you know. But I know he's here. I know he's here. And I have to tell y'all a quick little story. So on the 29th of July was the day that the album came out. And, you know, I never keep up with dates. But I want to do this interview with T.S. Madison. And she said, oh, y'all, Beyonce put the album out on the anniversary of Johnny's death. And I said, no, no. So you know, it was July 29th. It was the same day as his put that album out. You know, that's the end. That's him talking to us, right? That was how picture at the top of the thing too. It's like, we're not even going to waste time. Johnny said, here you go. That's right. There's this photo. That's right. I mean, definitely see in this. Yeah. Your daughter has such attention to detail that I think I just assumed she did it deliberately. But you talk about. They did too. And I was like, oh, I, and I couldn't wait to get out of there. And I called her and I said, guess what? You know, how you put the record out on July 29th. That's the thing of Johnny's death. She got really choked up about it. I had no idea. Like, you know, she's on a beautiful 14 one. He passed away. Right. And in that same vein, I don't know too many people, black or white or anything else, who were not homophobic in the 50s and 60s. So reading about your family and how everybody just embraced Johnny and was like, what you not going to do is come for my cousin and, you know, trying to keep him safe, teach him how to, you know, fit in with others and all that. How, how on earth you were like a little natural ally going, you know, talking to the white boy about where the gay club was at and going with them. So he could find his people and not feel so alone when you left Galveston. Do you look back now? Like, oh my goodness, we were really different. Like progressive. Yes. When I said that my family was progressive, but I don't think they knew. I think they just, you know, it started with his mama, Selena, my sister. And from the time Johnny was like, you know, I asked her, I said, when did you know that Johnny was gay? And she said, girl, I knew from they won. But they were like super tight. And she treated him so well. My mama treated him so, I family treated him well and gave the example for my, you know, my brothers were like, macho men. They were athletes and my nephews were too. And so they all protected Johnny. There was never any of that because it came from, you know, we do things in the image of our parents and the example that they gave us is, no, people are not going to mistreat Johnny. And I really, I didn't even realize it. It's just like, you know, in the book, I talk about the fact that my mom was married before. And that her, her ex-husband, who she had a really tumultuous relationship with, my mom had to go live with him. Yes. And then we grew up with him as our grandfather, the other grandfather. Like his kids were like our sisters and brothers. Now we didn't know that was weird. But we got to be okay. People would be like, that's your stepbrother. And I'm like, no, that was my mom was first husband's kid. And it's funny because my ex-husband, his ex-wife is my best friend. So I don't have those reservations about rules. Like if I love somebody, I love him because they're a good person. And I don't care how they came to me. It doesn't matter. But I realized that my progressive thinking was because of my family because we just weren't the traditional family. And we had to protect each other because it was, it was a whole bunch of us, because my sister had eight kids. My brother had four kids. And then it was us five kids. And when you fought one person, you had to fight everybody. We were like stick together. Yes. And you were a fighter. You were clear about that too. Like who won it? I'm ready. Pastor Marvin Wynems and many of his homies, uh, church go with his friend. Let's talk about it. Are putting on the big cape, the MCU, the DCU, the boys, they're putting on all the like, the girlies have come to fight the big fight. The Holy Justice League. The Justice Congregation. So Marvin Wynems, uh, one viral this past week after Clid came out of him, basically humiliating the fuck out of a member of his church because they were doing some day of giving shit for church building fund, sanctuary, rebuild in whatever bullshit. And he formatted this in a way where it's like, we're asking for you to come with a thousand plus a thousand. So like you have a thousand, you also bring someone who has a thousand with you and if you don't Then you stand in this line and we gonna stand in order of people who have the most money than also E does indeed equal mc square, so you have to think of that when you line up as well Anyway, this one lady came up there with twelve hundred and I was and he basically rebuked her Light skin as and told her to take her as a line because that's not what he asked for he asked for two thousand all is They have been on this man's ass rightfully so my bram correct correct say Because we're the ever lasting fuck did you get the not earth since then the woman question who he embarrassed Has defended 10 saying she was in the wrong line So in this seat of a thousand dollars plus two hundred and thirty five dollars and receiving the blessings to come to all that Participating now that that's only twelve hundred dollars. Yes You're not listening to what I'm saying if you have a thousand plus a thousand I'm gonna work on the other That ain't what I ask you to do baby. You are a victor His Marvin whining's mentee Fred Hammond a gospel singer from Detroit Says you know this is my charge and he posted like a extended cut of the footage Which Fred did nothing it did nothing like I don't know why people kept saying that oh you just need context. It's just nothing It changed so correct For this you know there's been a lot of Hustling around trying to maintain the narrative that there isn't anything There's like a blood sucking Lie like element right to these exactly of going on and right My two highlights For this experience of been Are you forgetting how much money a thousand dollars is are you hoping that it is come on have forgotten how much money Thousand dollars is One thousand dollars as a nigga in this economy on this nation For the building fun mine for the building fun of this sheet like shut up That you've been building for two decades you on the side of trades are you want money of the money going Marvin? No talking about we have been as a community we have been meaming the fuck out of the black church Building funds since before I was yes Yes, so the fact that you feel like you can step your black ball to ask in front of any congregation and ask for a thousand dollars plus a thousand dollars to me Right and this economy is so past bold I don't even know. I don't have I don't think there's a word for it. It's just so brazen. It's so like venomous and then for you to be like 1200 isn't thousand fuck you and the land you call home She was like I'm working on the other 800 and he was like that. I don't see you giving me my fucking check back I don't see that Are we get oh no, baby my other part of it was a little more patty and it's just like You are ready asking me for a ridiculous amount of money to go buy a fiber truck or go you know Get some cigars imported or whatever the fuck right But you also want me to do a rift matic on the day of like I'm not gonna do say how much money you want Just say 2000 just say 2000 a thousand plus is giving 99 just say $20 what the fuck are you talking about but then stand in this line in the order of who has the longest hair And who would also watch my feet with airs like you shut the fuck up right anybody else shut up defending this shut the fuck up You're not talking about here come give this two thousand dollars For this organization that you have receipts and history and Memory of going back into the community this organization that put them shoes on your baby's feet. That's it next to you Even then asking for $2,000 would be nuts everybody is broken bitches can't afford bread So that would still be bold Ace a sanctuary building fund for a building this 20 years old goddamn old a little like just standing up Just finding me. Are you trying to cuss me out bitch and get on Instagram and Facebook live And defend yourself. How about you holds because what do Marvin's house look like? Yeah, thank you I want to know what what does Marvin's home look like the outside and then side Who furnished that house what sort of vehicles do you have is this Christ like behavior Marvin linens? Do you think Jesus would tell the congregation to first of all separate themselves by who was giving the most it's actually When you think about what it took for the average person who lives in Detroit to come up with $1,200 to throw away insane insane insane for you to then turn around and talk to this woman with such disgust You sneered at her you talked down to her for being in the wrong line Really that's how you talk to people who are coming up with money to give to you for you to go ahead and mismanage I have you want to because they give it it to God and going back into God. Yes Including bitches who did not get up would not get up could not get left I could not believe what I was looking at I said this is supposed to be a man of God. I can't believe me doing this to us right now be easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle then for a rich man to see the kingdom of heaven And this is exactly why the more money you have the more societal power you have the less you feel like you have to give a fuck about other people And that's bad enough when it comes to regular regular every day people But those of you who are purporting to be messengers of Christ Where it's literally your job to behave in a Christ like men are like that you are you're the head of this church This is how you talk to people giving you money You didn't say wrong line here take your check back go in the broke bitch line and what's like not even that you That ain't what I asked you to do. All right. Well, you know what nothing I'm thinking about it God asked me to put this $1,235 towards my child. Yeah, who is growing Two inches every six months and do we just constantly need new clothes? Food costs Trump said the food costs was gonna go down them shits have tripled all of a sudden We releasing the tariffs on shit that can't be grown in America because duh hello surprise and we all have to get me cannot afford A kitchen running healthy human services y'all trying to double the government shut down right now because Republicans want to double the cost of healthcare Like bitch, you know what? Actually my god just told me take your check back put a stop payment on that check Do whatever you have to do and keep your fucking money girl Because this is insane. Do you know how much $1200 is in 20 25? This is where I'm so lost This is where I'm so lost that woman donated her money to this building And this is how you talk to her And you know in reality she donated money to the spinners that you want to put on your rolls You know where that money's really going because why is that church still not done like 20 damn years? Why aren't you have a home? Marvin wine is better be living in that church for it to still not be done and bitch still asking people for a thousand dollars Is insane Are you asking them for you ask your bitch to come up with a thousand dollars and they got from who knows where cuz everybody broke Plus bringing other bitch for that thousand dollars, too. Would you also like a unicorn? Would you like a phoenix? Like Would you like a polyjuice potion as well bitch? What are you talking about from where for what? Y'all robbing the community blind and it get all the internet what they add to you cuz bitches are calling you out Like we ain't been calling out this behavior for decades What happened to a willing mind for if there is first a willing mind? It is accepted according to what one has and not according To what he does not have I just don't This is not what there's nothing about this is godly. It's just This is the exact opposite of how Jesus would behave. Jesus would turn Your temple right over Jesus would be flipping every table both at pew you got up in that bitch I just could not believe and then as well It was add y'all taking it out of context is cuz she was in the wrong line You think it's okay to talk to people who are giving you $1,200 because they stood in the wrong line Y'all really think that's acceptable and okay That you are underspawn But have parachuted into the building and actually bust did up but she could have come corigning through and glass and literally been like here's a twelve hundred dollar check and you still should have been like thank you so much. I don't know why you barbed the evil carnival stunts with you but with this twelve hundred dollars we can fix that window plus like bitch you in there that's not what I asked you to tell Marvin to give up eighty percent of his salary till the building fund is done but well he asked y'all for one more damn dime and say so I I did see that tamar did like a joint post with some some plastic surgeon oral surgeon something like that somebody who was like I did it was on her Instagram where this doctor was like hi I'm a such a such oral surgeon plastic surgeon doctor and I fix teeth and tamar is my client or something like that. So I'm hoping this person wouldn't put her professional name and reputation at risk for a stunt for tamar braxton you know like if you if you get on Instagram crying about how people don't believe you which I understand how I'm like damn bitch something happens to me I'm having some sort of medical emergency I don't even understand what's going on in the first thing you bitches say is this better not be fake for promo with but if you release promo for for an EP like two days after you tell us about right you have to know some people are gonna go wrong especially when you're known to have a flare for the dramatic and the messy and the ridiculous I need to consider that if I were you I probably would I probably would have put out that trailer would have been like so we're to be promoting shit when I still got a bloody mouth and stitches but I do have I'm coming out I hope you all support it even though I won't be able to tour for a while while I finish healing or whatever I probably would have said something like that just to get around it but you know I'm also not one of the people who gonna go tight to tamar and like her raster about it I'm over here nowhere near Tamar speaking my opinion so right I also don't consider it harmful necessarily for but I I do empathize with her because that must be hard to deal with all your fans being like bitch we don't believe you or you better not be fucking playing with me like okay girl we shall see we shall did you see this white man or ABC news you got to be more specific than that oh my god you're so right you're so right that's not telling me anything I don't know I have no idea what you mean the white man suing Tyler Perry for 260 amps I did not he went on oh god let me find this oh yeah I watched the 12 minute interview this morning oh away away I mean I'll say this crystal is pretty much what we talked about it doesn't really say much of anything new they go over the stuff we talked about new for me was that I had to actually see the photo of Tyler Perry by the jet ski I told you I told you you deliberately ignore it was like no you're gonna see it you're gonna look at it and so yeah a lot of it was essentially it was maximizing his his voice okay is uh movement to sue this man and have him held accountable for okay what the alleged has happened to him um I didn't find anything necessarily off-plitting or odd or even noteworthy outside of that except for the part where um he was asked if it was true that he asked for money before the lawsuit uh to to buy his silence hmm and he said no I wanted accountability and I wanted to hopefully prevent that sort of thing from happening to other actors are in the future I did have a moment of course where I'm like you mean like the black actor that helped you put this case together that is currently in a situation with Tyler's business partner who says the very thing having them who you still have not talked about yeah that's a bit interesting but you know um I don't know much about algebra but I can kind of look at things that and and say two things can be true why people ain't shit why many shit and also Tyler you gotta step up to the front yeah get us up up to the front you do you do it's about this time you do I my thing is once you've been this egregious and this ridiculous this disrespectful this uh this thirsty in your pursuit just unendingly going after this why man who is cute like he's cute I get why you found him attractive but to be sexually harassing this man the way you did at that point I don't care if he takes a couple hundred of your aims I don't I don't why I'm sorry why should I leave that man alone you can go be with anybody who wants to be with you go pick one of the many many people who want to give you a booty hole and be with them leave this man who told you no once and that should really could have a girl and that's a thing too because after my eyes were accosted by the um I told you look at it when we talked about it and you said no truly it's the you refuse I said you need to look at Tyler Perry talking about you don't see the stud which I have to talk about that too you know what no we don't we already did we've already did it just brought it back up for me when I watch this and I saw it again I'm like god you old man right you thirsty old nigga who talks like this ill anyway so just this week now I've seen something from offset where he dirt he had like some shady comment where he directed it to Stefan like I'm cool on a bitch like I'll pass or or something like that like some sports reference obviously and Stefan promptly after that posted a photo of him catching a football on his Instagram story hilarious I loved it why would you say that to a wide receiver a professional wide receiver in the national of only why would you like you set yourself up for an easy hilarious joke you dumbass I think I was so stupid it was like anyway so I saw that and then I saw like one other thing before these braids I was like something else obviously I don't give a fuck baby but then I saw this picture that someone tweeted of Stefan next to a photo wave and they have matching corrows okay this appeared to upset offset maybe the boy was like his daddy was so bad about that same way in the future look just like Russell let me tell you something you can tell me shit I said what I said and I still don't make my favorite thing most last time you saw wave offset most of the last time you were physically in the same room as your son and so quickly I just you and Miss lady are not together anymore thank god because she said she could have killed him she said she was so stressed offset stressed her out so bad during this last pregnancy but that child whose name I don't remember this baby that the baby was born five damp pounds and she was just so sick of it wasn't just the cheating there was the gas lighting and the manipulation and of course all this other shit that comes with being with a fuck nigga and she said it was to the point where she could have killed that nigga with her bare hands and that she was going to end up in jail so she knew she had to step away like yes you did actually need to step away but this y'all should have been broke up being y'all long before culture even but okay whenever that was that you were performing on stage and then you came on air with a marching band and a cheat cake from public I'm sorry yeah half a dozen chicken wings hijacking your performance and making it about him and his apology like that was the thing right now it should it was should have been but yeah that's what she said she was close to killing that man with her own bare hands well amen look at what where we are now, not in prison. - Hey man. - But I would just, I'd love to know, because I feel like me, it's me in this situation, I'm putting myself in off such shoes, gross. - Where are the fucks to give about these braids? I don't. - It's just braids. - She didn't change her last name. - And if she. (laughing) - It's not wave digs. (laughing) - Calm down. (laughing) - If you hate it that bad, why don't you come get your son? Why don't you raise him? - Why don't you braid his fucking hair? (laughing) - I just don't, I don't have it for niggas. Y'all get all big and bad and mean, and start threatening this shit. - Do you know the name of the lady who braids his hair? - Like, because your son has the same braids as this nigga, really? Now you threatening somebody's life, don't do that. Also, mind you, they. Fans are claiming that this picture of wave is old as shit. He is in a visual straight backs right now. - Oh, what? - And if anything, Stefan maybe got his braids to look like waves as well. - Oh, so these aren't both? - So they're not side by side at the same time, but you wouldn't know that if you haven't answer a question for sure. - Well, since I'm looking at the braids and it is a unique enough design to wear, I don't think it was an accident, but. - No, certainly not. - It does make sense if it was like, oh yeah, I like that. Now what would be funny is if Stefan did a solid picture of wave and was like, I'm gonna have my girl, whoever his braider is. He's like, I'm gonna show her this and tell her, give me that right there. - That's what I'm saying. That's what fans are saying. - That he did it to antagonize. Okay, well, and see how easy it is to provoke you? Talking about when somebody died for playing with my son, the y'all gonna call me a crash out. I don't care. You trolled with my kid, that ends. (laughing) - You need to worry what the judge gonna call you. - I don't have it for you. You can be as mad as you want to reacting in a physically violent way is when only going to end. - Over braids. - Over braids. - This isn't a picture of Stefan punching wave in the fucking face. - Right. (laughing) - Braids? - Why do you feel emasculated? - By an nigga having a hairstyle that matches your kids. Why does that threaten you? Do you feel like that is a signal that he will eat the child? - No, it's a sign he's gonna replace you as a daddy 'cause you don't daddy. - Well, thank God. Someone needs to take care of the nigga. (laughing) Why? He should have one. Like, why is that upsetting? - God, why are you niggas mad? - I'm the only one that can neglect my child. (laughing) - If I'm not that bad. - You want to be a daddy. - Get no daddy, dammit. Yes. (laughing) I would rather you not have a father figure. God, dammit. - Or just. - Or even just your mama's man is cool. He treats the kids well like they're his own. Like, you should want that. Same way, Cardi should want whoever offset ends up with to treat her children with kindness, love, respect, integrity. You should want that man to be good to your children first and foremost and above anything else. - The court said that. - Yes. - Um. (coughing) - This. (coughing) - Please, please. - I'm trying. - Okay. - Okay, so, Susan the court. - And the court ruled that in the case of assault on one Emani Ellis security guard at the office or office building for an OBGYN working with Cardi B the time that she was pregnant a few years ago with high belief culture. - Yep. - They went ahead and threw that on out and said that she was very much innocent and did not have to pay the 24 million dollars in the civil lawsuit for assault against Emani Lewis. - Mm-hmm. - Kool Ray. But wait. - It's her. (coughing) - Fuck. - She didn't touch the curb. - Ciao. - I couldn't believe this shit. I could not believe it shit, my nigga. (laughing) - I could not. - There's no way I'm witnessing this. - This planet is the funniest. - God damn. - Spat. - It is a joke. - In the cosmos. It is hilarious. This is the funniest place in the universe. This lady did not touch the curb before she threw some shit - Hey, somebody else. I'm delighted. This was fierce. - I can't believe it. - So she's walking out in a very another congee-tomberknit. - She always looks great. - Always looks great. And I mean, this lady's pregnant. She let's just, she's pregnant. This lady's pregnant. But I'm like, I think she'll give a shit and I'm not surprised. So like, or invested. So some people are. One of them is an alleged reporter who decided to scream at her if the baby was offsets or Stefan digs. - Insiders have claimed me that offset is publicly bragging about getting you pregnant for the form time. Do you foresee any paternity issues with Stefan digs? - Stop it. - I don't know if it was a pen. I don't know what this is. Whatever it was in her hand. She tossed it in the direction. - Yeah. - And she tossed it in the direction of the reporter. And then is she, you know, chastised him and said, you know, do you hear any women ask me questions like that? Why do you feel like as a man it's your place to ask me something like that? That's fucked up. You don't have no manners. That's like somebody raised you then and not actually. - Yeah. - Heck like somebody raised you as funny coming from someone who just threw an ink pen. Had somebody else or asking her a question like, when are you going to act like somebody raised you? You stay in court. - You're wearing the same outfit like minutes ago. - You dodged 24 inns. - And you got another- - For this damn shit. - You stay in court. You're always getting sued. - The lady suing you came out right behind you and said, well, babe, you better know that we're writing that appeal today. It'll be in the hands of the girl yesterday. I'll see her next week. Of course, let's see how that goes. You got to write back into court with this same lady now who feels empowered because you could not help. - Yeah. - But throw something at somebody who yes, ask you a shady and disrespectful question. - Yeah. - But you have been Cardi B now for a while. - You have caught a few of these cases now. When is the self-restraint course? When is the anger management session? When do you talk to the lady about controlling yourself if for nothing else, but staying out in the courthouse so you have to pay people millions out. You just like, you couldn't even get in the car? - I couldn't believe this. You are leaving the courthouse. The security was looking like, I know you know what? I'm never not going to have a job. - I know that security guard bent out down there. I said, bitch, are you absolutely serious? - That was her lawyers. Her lawyers were like, so you just want to keep, so we just, we can't work for nobody else. We're just constantly going to be putting out your fires, girl. What are you doing? So. Her attorney said, get in the fucking car. Shut up, get in the car. - You know how most people would just ignore that while reporters are shouting whatever to them and cameras are flashing, they just kind of hide their head or walk out with their head high, either way, but they march towards, they vehicle, get in and speed off somewhere. They literally don't talk to them reporters, journalists, nosy bitches, fans, whoever else that's sitting outside the courthouse waiting. Like, they got the shot, that's all that matters. Why did you even speak back? Why, and you know what really killed me? So she just did an interview with Billboard and they said, you know, it's been seven years since invasion of privacy, what has changed about you since then, how have you grown? And she said, I've learned to control my emotions and understand how life works and how to play chess better. You've learned to control your emotions. Are you, are you sure? 'Cause somebody just got on your nerves asking a question that you've read probably millions of times online, this question of like, are you pregnant and if so by who? You came across that in real life and immediately threw an ink pen at the person who asked it. But you've learned to control your emotions. that must be you must be controlling your emotions in private where can nobody you'll see it. Because in public, you're acting like the exact same girl. Yeah, that's what it really matters. And it, I mean, it, especially as far as the courts are concerned. I, um, I, so she did a tick tock. Did you say the tick tock? She did after court where she took off her blazer and she's very clearly wearing this padding. No. So she, so she did put out that tick tock yesterday, um, and she's dancing to whatever her new song is. Bodega Barbie or whatever it's called, um, not the JZ song. No, not imaginary players. It's some song she's teased. I guess she's teased in some song from her new album. But she's obviously wearing some kind of square shaped padding under her outfit, which, so either she's pregnant. So right. My first thought is you are pregnant. You're just playing it up for the drama or to throw people off about how far along you are or whatever else. And you know people are speculating. So you wore this padding, knowing everybody would able to see it in this outfit. Like the way she got out the car when she was going to court, she, it was almost like she went to put her hand on her belly, belly, and she was waddling up in that bitch. So I think she wants to drive confusion about it. I think she wants to troll people about whether she's pregnant. She's not and am I the drama as a thing? Perhaps, which like I already said, it would be deeply annoying, but I didn't even consider that there was a third possibility of her not being pregnant and also not doing this for the sake of promoting an album, but doing it because she's just childish and thinks it's funny. That didn't work. But I think now I'm thinking like that might be it. But I'm I'm tapping out because Cardi B is emerging up to where it started as that. And then someone could be was like, hey, what if we just make the album, call it am I the drama and do a whole thing with it? Sure. My thing is I'm not a big enough Cardi B fan to go back and forth with tricks and games. I don't like that. That's not funny to me. I'm not entertained by it. I don't find it funny. So you can go over there, be a troll, be immature and act like a little kid. All you want to is a free country. My point is you're 32 with three and a possible kids. And I don't I'm not seeing the growth here. And so all the things I said about Nicki Minaj when I when Nicki was acting like a fucking dumbass in every interaction with you and taunting you and trolling you and all that shit you all of that is applying to you as you are now in your 30s, a grown ass woman with multiple fucking kids and still acting like you did when you first came out. I'm not talking about showing your real personality being a ghetto bitch, cussing and interviews. Well, but I don't care about none of that. I'm talking about your fucking antics, the shit that keeps you in court. I'm mildly annoyed by this issue. Is she not pregnant thing for you to leave court after just getting away from a case and immediately opening yourself up for another case. When are you going to grow up? I'm blowing mind blowing. Oh my god. My boy. If I was a driver, when it took her home, I would have taken your round. I would have taken it out. At the place. You're out of your fucking mind. Oh, I don't really know where the heart is. You need to go to the place. And in this billboard, you just dodged $24 million and threw up in and ignore a question without throwing some shit at them. This is not felony ground. What are you doing? Sweetie. You need this needs to be addressed today. You have to call that therapist back today. And say, I'm actually not done. I thought I was done. I'm not done. In some cases, they will pencil you in somewhere like if they have like an emergency or they will find somebody else who's precious or who might be available. You need to find the guy because girl, baby, $24 million, you could easily give him to Emani and probably still will now. I mean, you couldn't get into the width. You couldn't hit the curve. You're really on the sidewalk before you threw some shit that somebody else. But tell billboard how she's matured and grown up so much and she has better control over her emotions. Where? Where? God, forgive me. My Campbell seems to be doing so well. She seems to be in a really good place. If you don't know, she has had I think a assortment of mental health issues. She's not been doing great in the past, but she seems to be doing well, looking really healthy and good now. So I was like, I love to see this. My Campbell, one of the original baddies from my childhood, just like so fine, so talented, child. And then in that very same breath, she was talking about how she wants to get her mother's story told. And the what the what she was talking about, she sounded interesting. And then she said, so if somebody could put me in touch with Tyler Perry, Tyler Perry, if you if you can hear this, if you listen to this, like, I would love for you to produce my mother's story. And I was like, see, it's always the Lord gives the Lord takes because a lot of us. This is why I'm so sorry. Are you doing that? You might not be doing that. This is why we have to branch out. This is why the girls have to let other people write things for them or and or direct things. So this is why we have to spread it out. You know, this is why I love people like Esa of house right. This is why I like girls like Lena of house weight. I can say for my experience and from things that I've seen are like, oh, this is the door that's open for me. Hey, everyone, come on. You know, so lady Brunson because of house Abbott House Abbott's lady Brunson, first of her name. You see what I'm saying? Bringing the girls new as well as the girls iconic legendary of you. And that's it helps. I think because the girls are going to be like, oh, I need a movie to be made a black movie. Let me call Tyler, yeah. Other people out here, sweetie, but I do, you know, I do get it. I don't want my moment of like, girl, really Tyler of all people. Let's just, let's just stay hydrated and meditate a little bit more like anything. I'll get people to watch it because one of you niggas just hit me talking about, I think duplicity explains how she got on the boat in Acrimony. You're not going to terrorize me. I'm not going to allow you to do this. His latest bullshit. Okay. I promise you this niggas just opens his thosaurus, slips through the page of his eyes, close, and picks a word, and then he just makes a movie based on its definition loosely. I've never even heard of this. You don't need to. Wow. I don't know if it's a show or a movie. He's just always doing some shit. He just picks a big word and then just makes a movie. You big with us. He went, you know what he did. Cromulent. Stop there in Pierre. Please let me get it out and Ryan Destin. Please. He went to a Google and he typed in synonym for dishonest. That's what I'm saying. And the sores.com came back with duplicity and he was like, that's it. God damn it. Brilliant. I'm a genius. Three of more syllables. That's it. I hate it. God bless all the black actors. In big and start Kiki promise. I'm doing my best. You have a question? Okay. What's your name? It's MJ. Oh, okay, Mary Jane. So first of all, I don't need help. MJ said, fuck that bitch and the click. You claim. I think I can speak for everyone in here. Kid Fury. We are all so proud of you. So proud of you. Make him cry. Make him cry. Make him cry. Make him cry. So proud of you. Make him cry. Make him cry. Make him cry. Our first letter this week comes from PNW Rose who says, I've been blissfully married for 14 years. We have really been through it, especially in the beginning because of our 18 year age difference. We didn't realize there were that many years between us until an earth, wind, and fire song came on and I said, oh, my mama has us cleaning the house with this." And she said she first heard it in the club. But we were already in love and I was 35. Too grown to pass on love. Now I would just say you're 35. Y'all have 18 year age gap. That means she was 53. So I'm going to let y'all have that. Normally I would be like 18 year age gap, girl, what the fuck? But if you were 35, I'm going to let that go. Obviously. Okay. So anyway, we love trash TV, love after lock up, love at first sight, 90 day franchise, all of it. That's documentary. So we were watching Summer House, the episode where Jesse Solomon gives his toe sucked. We love to pause the TV and debate, laugh, discuss, etc. So when paging them, we're telling Jesse how problematic it was to get his toe sucked. I said as soon as you walk in the wrong is cheating. Anything that could be considered sexual is cheating, except of course watching porn or masturbating. My spouse stopped me right there and said, wait, you masturbate? I said, yeah, why not? It's not all the time anyway. She broke down in tears. In tears? I'm a femme and she's an old school dyke who feels like I should have just come to her for sex or said I was feeling horny. But to me, this has nothing to do with her. Sometimes I can't get to sleep or one of us is out of town or some weed made me feel away and I don't want a whole session. I also don't like being the aggressor sexually. Our sex life is slower but still steamy and satisfying. As I've talked to her, but my darling studsman is a quating masturbating to who knows what the fuck because she won't talk to me. She says she needs time to think about how she's going to handle this. I'm not sorry. It's my body. I'll do what I want and I don't think I should feel guilty. I'm not pleasureing myself and then uninterested in having sex with her. It has nothing to do with her. So what do y'all think about all this? Should I feel guilty for masturbating? Do you think we're headed towards divorce? Thanks, PNW Rose. Rose. Okay. I've heard of this type of spat in relationships before and for the people on your partner's side or from her perspective, I'm just like, I don't get it. But if I love you, I should try. I just feel like I would be like, is this a legit concern of yours or do you want to argue with me right now? Like, is this a, I don't know if that's the case. But I'm just like, are you actually feeling some type of way about this specifically or are you like, do you want to argue? Like, are you, some people like fighting? Some people like to like to fuss at you for a reason to like make a, because they find that like, I honestly feel like motherfuckers be bored. It's what they fight sometimes. I am sure. Now, this could vary. I'm like, I laughed. I feel like my initial response would be like, are you legit? I would think it was a joke. Fun, fun, right? Because this is my living body. I think may do with it as I please. The same way you may do with your body. Yeah. What you, like if you, if I want to bust in the shower or you're taking a bath, relaxing, or something or who doesn't fixing something, cook, whatever. Try to come in to wrap you. No. Should I wait when I can just do it myself? What? I don't understand. So if I were to get to the place where I realized, like, this is actually something that's legitimately bothering you coming from a place. I think I would want to understand where that place is. Maybe try to help you understand where that place is that you can unpack that. Right. You know, with the people who need to help you unpack it. Or you just do that over there. But it isn't fair or even logical, I think, to villainize your partner for masturbating. It doesn't make sense. It does not make sense to me either. And the way she is responding to it, I think, is more of a red flag for me than even that she feels that way. They're like, the feeling itself is weird enough. Right. But now she won't talk to you as she needs time to think about how she's going to handle this. You need time to think about how you're going to handle me touching my own body. Did you think I never played with my own pussy? You're joking, right? Like, first of all, sex between two women is going to last for a minimum of 45 minutes. Sometimes you just want to get on out of there. Like, I'm not trying to vote, you know, hours to have sex with you every single time I feel like having sex. And again, this is my body. I've been touching on this body all my life. Like, no, I'm not going to feel bad about it. So it should you feel guilty, of course, not whether y'all end up heading for divorce, I think, is going to depend on whether your wife can get over herself. Like, I agree. You, she's having some, some sort of existential crisis because you touch on your own parts. Is a therapist available? Because at this point, you said, y'all been married for 14 years. Y'all fell in love when you were 35. So you're roughly sure earth and earth and fire in the club. This is a lot for her. So you're 49. I mean, she's what 67 now? I'm not explaining to no 67-year-old guy that I like to touch myself. Did you want to just fight with me? Like, do you want to? I actually love that question. I don't think, I don't think that question is particularly like helpful in the overall. I think it'll probably make things a little worse, but it's funny. And it's what I would, I would have been like an impulsory action for me. I'm not saying that's what you should say. I would have, I think I would have said, are you, are you? Are you, are you? I would have said something like, are you? Tweet it. Let me look at that weed. Listen to this. Like, are you, are you joking? Yeah. You have a camera. If this is fun, I would laugh. Yes, I would laugh so hard. I would think you were joking. Like, you can't be serious. I should have just come to you. I agree. What if I didn't have an hour and a half to bust a nut? What if I just wanted to get it over with and go about my day? I should have come to you every time. What if you're out of town? What if you're at work? What if, like you said, I've smoked some weed and now I'm horny. Like, what if I just want this nut to be by myself on my own little groove or my own little thing? Like sometimes much like the bath that I just referenced. You just want to take a bath. Yeah. I just, you don't want the nigga to leave the house while you take a bath. Even me, you can just, let's just meet me time. This, I don't understand why this is, you know, it really shouldn't be and it doesn't have to be something that y'all break up behind. Hopefully, hopefully she takes no more than a month to figure this out for herself and get back to normal. And honestly, I think the month is considering y'all gay and y'all been together for 14 years because let me tell you something. If I'm talking to somebody for 14 days and she'd be like, you can't touch yourself, sweetie, we're never speaking again ever again. I'm simply not responding to your phone calls or text messages. You're blocked. Are you okay? Oh, you're not. And what do you think? That's for telling me upfront that you wasn't okay. Thank you so much for telling me before I go. Who knows when I would have found out other 14 years deep when I'm watching Tiger King. Oh, you, you flicked the hints. Tears. She didn't even walk in on you. She you just were like, oh yeah, I masturbate. Crying? I've been worried because y'all because y'all have been locked in for 14 years. I would give it a month for her to snap out of this. Yeah, I'm very sure. And after that, you need to call somebody. You need to call your, your dyke sister circle. You need to tap you. You need to call. There's actually this and older, very incredibly attractive. Blacks, the mask. I don't know what she calls herself, but she has like a podcast. Um, and maybe you need to reach out to her. See, do she have some advice for you or something, but that is from that light skin lady. No, no, she's not light skinned. She's a pretty brown. I saw her. She interviewed Woody, uh, Hootie daddy's woody. Oh, okay. The Britney grind, the free Britney grinder video, woody. Yes. Yes. Because woody, I follow woody on Instagram and she posted a clip talking about how she don't like light skin girls and she don't like skinny girls. So get away from hard with all of that. Uh, but anyway, I love love you. You go have to reach out. You go have to find somebody to help you work through this. But I'm not going to stop masturbating. I'm not going to lie to you and say that I'm going to stop masturbating. You are being absurd and you need to figure this out. Yeah. Good luck. Good. I mean, really considering there could be something, you know, very deep that is attached to this for her that she does. Sure. And maybe within that month that Crystal mentioned, you'll figure that out. And so, you know, and she can go and figure that out. However, she does have to regardless of whether she is cognizant of it is verbal about it. She has to recognize that the way that she is treating us absurd. And so the next step we take is what? Because I'm going to play with my personal mind. And that's the longest shirt I've been sweetieed. It's mine. It's built right in. What do you mean? Half the time I touch it, I don't even try to. It's just right. And with everything, Ms. Motherfucker puts me shut up. I do what I want with it. Who the government? Best of luck rose. So our first letter this week comes from Jayla. And Jayla says, hi, Crystal and Kifuri. I'm pregnant with my first child. And my mother-in-law has made it about her from the very beginning of my pregnancy. And right now, she's sitting on top of the very last nerve that I have. When we told her we were pregnant, she was so excited, but didn't show any excitement for me or my husband just that she was going to be a grandmother again. Then when we went to tell people closest to us, like family and friends, she had already beaten us to it. I'm talking about literal aunts and uncles. This is so fucking annoying. The person who officiated our wedding, our Godparents, the aliens in space, literally any aunt everybody. I was annoyed because this is my first child. And she stole the opportunity from my husband and I to share with people after trying to give her some honor and respect of being the first to know. Is it his first child? Yes. Yes. No, this is her and her husband's first child, her brother-in-law and sister-in-law already. Oh, God, I got it. So that's why she's already a grandmother. Okay. Which is like, okay, calm down. She even shared the news with her sorority. And someone I'm not close with anymore reached out to me because they found out because they mom is in it. That is wild. The sorority for what? When I express to my, especially because you got to be at least 50. Why are you? Okay. Anyway, when I express to my like having a little face group face group with your sorority is one thing, but telling them about this. When the news is public, like girl was wrong with you. Are you okay? Okay. When I express to my mother-in-law that I had asked her not to share the news with anybody which she did anyway, she essentially hit me with oh well, too bad by Rocco. I don't get this. I don't I do not understand the sensuality. Then the day we announced after I explicitly said in American English to her to not post on social media, she made her own post on social media with a ridiculous song attached and announced again that she was going to be a grandmother. I kind of iced her out after that because I was beyond annoyed. We shared our gender reveal after we told everybody that we wanted and posted on social media and once again, she never congratulated me or my husband. But of course she said she's happy that she is a boy mom and now a boy grandma. She even said she was glad we weren't happy. She sounds like an idiot. She even said she was glad we weren't having a girl because quote I would have had a hard time with her. She also sounds like she's at least 80. She is the one who really hasn't seen you all the time. I can tell she has an issue with girls by the way she talks and how she constantly got me fucked up. And at this point, I do not want to tell this woman another thing until I scoot this baby out my cooter. Why would you? I genuinely want her to have a relationship with her grandchild and I don't want to be that daughter-in-law, but I can't help but feel protective of my child and feel that if she can be this way with me, it will only spill over to my baby. Of course. I can see her overstepping, continuously disrespecting me and not listening to boundaries in the future, especially because homegirl lives less than 10 minutes away. If you were in the situation, would you continue to keep her at bay or try to keep the peace? I feel like I'm always bending to accommodate her feelings at the expense of my own. And the more pregnant I become, the shorter my fuses. I know that's right. Of course. Thanks. And I love y'all so much. I never miss an episode. Jala. Jala, I'm just going to try to make this rap a fire. But I think you know what direction I'm going. I'm setting the boundary. I'm setting the boundary with no sugar on top. I'm standing 10 swollen toes on the top of the head. And if you have a single solitary issue, I suggest that you express it elsewhere. I don't understand this sentiment of I'm the pregnant one over here. But you get to say whatever the fuck you want to, you get to do whatever the fuck you want to. You get to have attitude with me. You get to micromanage me, micromanage me, manipulate me and freak the system. I feel like a lot of parents, especially women do this to daughter-in-laws because it's like, I wish you would try to tell me how I'm going to navigate the family here. I'm not going to tell you how to navigate the family that you've had. This one's mine. This is my baby. Exactly that. Going in my body. Right. If I say that you can't drink milk in this house because I don't like it, guess what? You're dairy free until your mother fucking feet hit that mad again, bitch. I don't give a fuck about what you're talking about. We are going to have an absolute sitcom relationship if that's what it takes for you to respect that this is my child, my family, my household. And I'm calling the shots in here, okay? He also can call a couple of shots. It's been my, yeah. But the baby, the baby is special for this baby gay. Right. I'm number one period. It's growing inside me. Ain't no grandchild without me. You've been pregnant. And so you should understand this. Why are you doing this? Boy, moms, they're weird. They're weird. They're weird. They're weird. They're weird. I mean, I'm talking about not only am I going to be firm, I'm going to be petty about it. You don't already take in my, like an experience from me. My first time getting ready or being able to share with this person, that person, that person. Right. We're having a baby. That would have been enough for me. You didn't have to put up enough, no matter right. But you taking us step further to tell complete strangers. And I got bitches hitting me up because we have moms in the same sorority. Bitches, I don't even like no more. Girl. Oh, girl. And then I say something to you. And you basically tell me, oh, well, oh, well. I got you. Oh, well, I'm glad you feel that. Yeah. Because when I tell you, draw four. I can match that energy thing. Yeah. I'm scared. Right back. I'm sitting there. We're not doing it. Yeah. So I would be very, very firm on it because outside of your own mental and physical well-being, and I would assume the same thing for your kid as you are, you know, moving further and further along into the pregnancy. I'm not allowing you to set no standard of how this family thing is going. And if it means that you go right back to that fucking, um, I didn't want to. I was going to say a sorority. I know. You bitch. Don't do that. Don't do that. I don't want to leave us alone. Leave us alone. I swear to God. You better not say no. Sigma. Delta. Alpha. I'm going to say, if you don't like my feelings, my messaging and my fences, bitch, take that shit right back to Facebook messenger and you pour into them and let them pour right back. But when you come over here, hold, you know what time it is. You know, like it, all you want to. But you are going to respect it. I'm not going to walk in your mother fucker house and ask you why the fuck you making a plate for your grown ass. Because that's your business in your house. You're not going to come over here and do a fuck thing. Right. You are already getting too spicy. And I let you have that. Yeah. Well, I tell you, we would have a VPN. as relationship until it gets better. - Quite. - Phase and three. - Yeah, and that's all hard. And that's-- - I'm not gonna let you play in my face and get used to it. Fuck that. - Absolutely not. I completely agree. I think this woman deserves a thorough cussing out, but since that's not usually the way to have, you know, a healthy relationship between everybody involved, it sucks when we have to be more mature than our literal elders. It's kinda like, damn, I would think you would be the one showing me how to be mature, but you're actually-- - Sure, damn. - You're the bitch who-- - She should be able to handle it. - Live, and I just know that lady wakes up and clocks in for her shift on Facebook. I know she does. (laughing) - I know she does. I know she is on a bitch all day. - All right, all right, I'm just-- - Every morning, good morning, Satan! I just know she-- - Hey, I feel it. There's, you know, way that's not the case. - She got some sparkly little blingy thing with her sorority on it, and anyway, anyway. - I think what you really like realistically need to do here is make sure that you and your husband are on the same page, 'cause he's gonna be the pro-- - For sure. - This is his mom. - For sure. - He's-- - For sure. - So he is going-- If she's allowed to disrespect you, keep overstepping her bounds, and things like that. It'll be because her son allows her to do it. It won't be because she's right. So you need to talk to your husband and make sure y'all are on the same page right fucking now before the baby gets here about what y'all are going to do and how others are going to-- You need to just set up the parameters for how people are gonna be with your newborn. And it sounds like y'all are on the same page, 'cause after she pitched y'all off with the pregnancy announcement, y'all are like, "Okay, we doing the gender reveal our way "and we not telling her first fuck that." 'Cause you don't know how to act. So let's have a plan now. She not finna be in the delivery room. I don't give a fuck if you wanna be there. That's too damn bad. And yes, my mama can be there in yours, can't, 'cause I'm the pregnant one and E-Ni, oh well. - Tough. - Tough titties. Should've had-- - And-- (laughing) - You suck. It's not-- - And you suck! - If you were nice, maybe I would want you in the room, but I hate you. - And I don't-- - You are a stressor. - Yes. - And I need that. - The most monstrous thing that biologically happens to the community. - Correct. - So, bye. - I need to be in there with my low five music and pretend that I'm giving birth in a lavender field. And I do not need you live streaming on Facebook so that your sorrows get the first look at your grandchild, a bitch suck my ass. So, whatever it is, like if it's hospital stuff, if it's who comes over after the baby is born, if it's touching, kissing the baby, a lot of people. - Oh my God. - I've gotten a lot stricter about that since whenever she last gave birth. - What, I heard for us was recated? - Well, because it's, I'm sorry, you not putting your nasty lips on my unvaccinated fresh ass newborn. - Remember when he had this shit eating grin, 'cause he got Dr. Dr. Beckton up, he could not wait to tell her I see the mama. - I don't see. - Yeah. - The musician said you're wrong. - And that is right. You not supposed, whatever, however you would feel most comfortable, this is your first child. I don't care if you're overprotective. You, this is your first child. I be doing a lot with my dog. You think if I had a human baby, I wouldn't be a hundred times stricter. I absolutely would. And anybody who don't like it can get the, especially, especially in this COVID. - And with all the snakes that came out the grass during, it's like, oh, you're nasty. Uh-oh. - Right. And it sounds like you're probably gonna give birth in the winter when cold and flu and all other kinds of germis and viruses are everywhere. Yeah. You can be as strict as you want to be about your newborn. And if she don't like it, then your husband needs to be the one to check her. 'Cause if you do it, it's not gonna be in a nice way where mama still feels good about herself. - Do it anyway. - However, Crystal is a hundred percent right. That it should be like, oh, okay, that's how you feel? Get your girl. - Yeah. And maybe like-- - I say something, you already know. - Mama, mama, let's go talk. You need to take her out on the lanai and have a conversation with her. - It's the lanai. - About what's really gonna happen. And it's not right. It's not Jaila wants this, it's we want this. We-- - Just don't say nothing. Just finish the sweet thing. - That's what you need to do. You need to shut up, mama, 'cause she's not playing. And you'll fuck around and not see this child for weeks after it's born. If you piss her off, I would suggest you don't piss her off. 'Cause she's not playing. We not playing, not she. We are not playing about our child. - We-- - Exactly. - You don't-- - 'Cause the moment that he starts doing she, she, she. - Yeah. - Then it becomes a bargaining thing because she, the problem that you, my son, that she has to hear from his perspective. I'm over your shit as well. You don't think I wanted to tell 'cause in such and such. I was having a baby. Are you okay? - And a lot. - You don't have to do. - A lot of grown men have trouble confronting their mama. It's like that. You don't have to say it mean like we do. But you, 'cause we are mean, gays. So, you don't have to be like us. But you do have to be able to stand up for yourself, advocate for yourself and say, I get you. You always been my mama, I'm always love you. You're my fucking mama, duh. And at the same time, I'm a grown man with a wife and a child. This is my family. And we don't have to do things your way. And we will not, you will not be allowed to force your way. It's not, oh well, too bad I do whatever I want to do. There are repercussions. - No, you really don't. - You really, this is my child mama. And if you can't listen to that and hear me clearly, then you will feel that you will feel it. - Jamaican proverb. (laughing) - It's true. - Oh, good luck, Jayla. But it sounds like, yeah, just you and your husband need to make sure y'all on the same page about things. And then, yeah, let him handle it. - And he is probably gonna have to just spell it out. You will not see this baby. - Please, don't play with us. - Let me catch you put one shriveled lip on my child, kissing my brand new baby that can't even be vaccinated yet. - The moment that you pull out a men's toes. - You know, newborns get heartbeats 'cause of that. We're not, yes, newborns can get heartbeats because grown people kiss them all over the face and stuff after they were born and they not vaccinated against nothing yet. People are strict about it for a reason. So. - And then once you know, I have a mug shot. - Right, 'cause now I have to, now I know. - Right, and now you won't see your child because you'll be dead. You won't see your grandchild because you won't be here. - Maybe in the spiritual realm. - 'Cause you have me fucked up. - Because you have me fucked up. - Now on God's earth. - Good luck to you and your husband, Jayla congrats on the baby. Our next letter comes from Sandra who says, my fiance and I got engaged in '22 and it wasn't exactly my ideal proposal. I told him specifically, when I got the idea that he was proposing that I wanted my nails, that I wanted my nails and here to be done and I want to be dressed really cute and most of all, more than anything, I've wanted the proposal to be a surprise. He immediately failed at the surprise thing. Because he told me when he bought the ring and when it arrived. Then I realized the day he was proposing because he set up the date. I usually set up all of our dates so I figured this was it. Mind you, my hair wasn't done, no were my nails and my dress was a basic sun dress from Ross and I was not ready at all and kept dropping hints that I knew he was trying to propose. And since I told him I wanted it to be a surprise, I thought he would wait longer until I wasn't expecting it. Well, he didn't. He proposed by recreating our first date, which was cute for our first date, but it was during COVID, so basically everything was closed. But I wouldn't-- - That's perfect. - But I would not have recreated that day for a proposal. So really, I just felt like he didn't listen at all and kind of ruined what was supposed to be my one and only proposal. - Oh my god, I wanted to hide. - We've talked about it multiple times, argued over it multiple times and I've even suggested that he just try again. - What? - I'm sorry, okay. - I've been losing weight and my ring will need to be resized so I said that could be a good opportunity to try again and surprise me this time. I'm not sure if I'm doing too much or he's not doing enough. He does pay all the bills for our home because right now I'm trying to build our business as Amazon sellers. Do you think I should just be grateful that he's a provider? He is really sweet, but I'm not sure if this is gonna be something I can just get over as it was really important to me and he knew that. - What do y'all think I should do? Thanks for the advice, Sandra. - Seeing now, okay, Sandra, you, how delightful. - I feel like we've been advocating for Cori Niggas and then it's like, it's gonna be half as like you who pushed the needle too far 'cause you won't. You want you want to be Snow White, you want to be Ariel, you want to be. You want to do me still. Tiana without the frog like I don't and I don't give, I've never, I, I will give a fuck about marriage and especially the ceremony around it. Like I just don't care. I respect everyone's right. I believe we women should have the right if they're in love and so on and so forth. Um, I have nothing against it. I'm just not so dialed in to interested in the ceremony or the traditional acts around marriage, proposing engagement and then I don't give a fuck about that. If anyone wanted to get married to me and I was okay with being married to him, he could really, we can be walking out of rouse and be like, Hey, I got you this. Okay. We're next week. Let's do it. What day? We go right down to this courthouse. Like Thursdays, you know, I know Thursdays are very okay, all right, fine. That's me. So I say that to say you're not going to get that much empathy or energy out of me when it comes to this because I wouldn't give too much left to Thursday. Um, that's one, two, I just questioned it in general. Why the fuck? You say the nigga cool, he sweet, you like him enough to get married to him. I want to jump right back to the beginning of this letter where you like. I wanted to be a surprise, but I also need my nails done. I need my hair done. I need new lashes, I need my highlight. I need contour. Okay. I have to get a brand new dress, a very fancy underneath. Oh girl. I also have to get a new bag like, but it has to be a surprise. So make sure that you plan an elaborate proposal in the fucking Times Square, right, with a performance by Katzai and Drew Hale and fucking Sabrina Carpenter and, right, I want Bruno Mars. And it has to be so bright and silks on it and the pits. And so, like bring out into the park to it, don't forget it. Don't forget it. Okay. We need an in-and-out track, I don't care how you get it. I don't care. I say good booze and it better be a surprise. Like what the fuck are you talking about? Yeah. The only way that could be a surprise is if you always have your hair and nails done and you always dress real nice and all that. That's a special occasion for you. How is it supposed to be a surprise, baby girl? Then I was like, oh, he went to like recreate our first date or something, but it was COVID and it wasn't really giving. So I didn't like it. So I told him to start over it. Like what are you talking about? You must've just never gotten like, it is. I'm talking about Temple of Doom. I'm talking about the Philosopher's Stone. It is the chamber of secrets to get this negative agree to marriage, to matrimony, much less a happy one. Oh my god. It is the Azgeban prisoner. Bitch. It is the mother. It is the bridge to terabitia. It's the lion. It's the witch. It's the wardrobe. Girl. It's the nice and the man. You can't get these niggas to do it. You have a nigga who's like, let me do some sweet corny shit for you. And she was like, it's COVID and enough people in this orange Julius. Like, what the fuck are you talking about? Why does it even need to be like, if you have a guy who's willing to make a sweet romantic effort and you really like him, okay? And you're pleased with the ring because that's important. Yeah. Yeah. It matters. I'm supposed to wear it. I need to like it. And we're talking about the proposal. Where are you talking about the wedding? I'm talking about just when he asks you to get married, which spoiler alert, you're going to say, yes, because you're planning on this, but you wanted to do this. I don't know why you're nitpicking and it doesn't sound like you, there's no point in this later where he was where he, you said like he responded by saying, girl, fuck you and your ideas. I don't even want to marry you. You layman. Right. He's making an effort, but he's like, oh, no, nails not done that day. No. They're saying the fresh blowout, no, I don't like this date. Why doesn't even matter, why I want you before we talk about this nigga or any of the festivities around it. I want to know why it is this important that the time, place and manner in which this man asks you a question, it's so specific. I need to know why. Well, I mean, I get it, but I think you, I get wanting it to be romantic. Sure. I get one sweet. I think you really, you really illustrated an excellent point of like you wanted to be a surprise, but you also want all these other things that, well, if you, if you don't get your hair and nails done every week or every two weeks religiously, how is he supposed to surprise you? Go ahead and pull out your finest fashion, Nova and go get your hair blown out and get your nails done for no reason at all. Like, how is he supposed to? You want it to be romantic and this, you want to look good in all this, but he can't plan the date. So you like, oh, I knew you was going to propose because you plan the date. Well, girl, what is he supposed to do then propose at home in the living room? You're going to be dressed for that probably not. So you, I think you do need to kind of think about whether what you're asking for is really realistic because I don't, it sounds like you need to, it sounds like you need to turn into a type of person who stay with her hair and nails done. If you really want it to be and dressed, you want all these, but that's not even the only problem. That, you're 1,000% right now, like you go ahead and I'm like, that's really it. That's really it for me because I think I don't necessarily have a problem with you wanting those things, but it sounds like they're incongruent with like all of these together, don't go together. And what is that for like, do you want all that? It sounds like you want all that so that Instagram and Facebook give you the compliments you want. Exactly. And you have a wedding today. It's more about what people will think as opposed to what you will think. I can. It's more about how other people would see it as opposed to how you saw it or how you felt. You have this dream proposal in your head. That's nice. I'm not, I'm not saying you can't have that fantasy, but you're not, you're not, it's not even realistic and it's not a woman like Chrissy Lampkin out here, just like, well, well, I mean, with this nigga since Harry met Sally and that's y'all fault. That's y'all. Every bit of wife is here. That is y'all fault. Y'all want to be wife so bad and you stay running behind a man who not going to marry you, that's your bad. A you got a nigga who's like, well, it's COVID, so it is a perfect time to propose to my lady at the Lennox mall, who court, because it's all for us. And this is like, he proposed in 2022 and then 2025, you sent an email to the read talking about I want to do over if you're this like specific about the time, place, styling, lighting, angles, cinematography, catering, like if you're this, you know, about, about it, how this is going to be, then you need to be involved. And if you're going to be involved, it can't be a surprise. Yeah. Yeah. That's really it, sweetie, unless you'd a type to just be dressed to the nines to go run errands, like you just, looking like a man, getting married, it is not having engagement party. You could have an engagement party if you wanted to be dressed up and all cute and take pictures. That's totally separate from the way you get your engagement party. You get your bridal shower. You get your wedding. You get your honeymoon. There are so many opportunities for you to post photo dumps and get all the likes. Who cares? It really, it really sounds like you want likes. This is for social media. My Googler does not have to direct the proposal, my glove, like, as I said, at the top of this, he even got to produce my guy, damn wedding, we can go right down to, where do I frequent? Cold stone. I'm not anymore. but someplace that sells candy, it's gonna get sugar and get married. It's for a lot of fucking care. - Yeah. - We get married right down at the Barnes & Noble. - I would like to look nice at my proposal, if only because as soon as people realize you're getting proposed too, they start recording. And somebody's gonna put that on TikTok and I don't wanna be looking crazy in the dark park. - They're all over the place, swearing sweatpants with a hole in 'em. And here you go, talk about what you be my wife. No, nigga. No, Shay, I'll give you this, that part of it. A nigga can finesse if he really just pays attention. Like, unless, like, Crystal, I think say it, unless you just kind of all over the place with when you get dumped up. - Yeah. - If a nigga just pays attention or just looks the right, he can easily figure out when you're gonna get your things done or he can even plan it for you. Is that if he plan? - He can plan. - He can't plan in a bit because then you'll know you're getting proposed to. It's like you're-- - No, he can plan, yeah, that's what I'm saying. He would have to finesse something to make sure that she's gonna have her hair and nails done. - And be dressed. 'Cause she wants to be dressed and something real cute too. - But she can get her hair and nails done. Oh, I don't know how that works. I was gonna say, like, what if he got her hair and like the dress part maybe would be like the next day? Well, we're going to, like, I got my homeboy hook me up with like four seats. Oh no, I'm just spitballing. - Yeah. - So like, go get it and then tomorrow we're gonna go to this thing. So it's not like all I have to do at all at the same time, something's up type T. - But again, I'm trying to make up a surprise for somebody, it's damn impossible to surprise because she is planning the proposal. - Especially with this really cool-- - And how she wants it done. - A redo, now you know what's happening. How could it possibly be a surprise when you are already engaged? (laughing) - Thank you for writing this in now and balancing the acts and reminding listeners that some of y'all was crazy too 'cause this isn't make it-- - I don't think you're crazy, but this is, I do think you need to really think-- - You're doing a lot. - You're doing a lot. - Yeah. And why you wanting-- - You're having a surprise. - You need to ask yourself why you want it. It could be-- - Definitely. - That he don't care what you care about, but it doesn't sound like that. You said you're very sweet, you face all the bills. I wouldn't recommend y'all let a nigga do that. - He's made some attempts and you ain't like him. (laughing) - We're just fair. - And y'all keep arguing about it. For three years y'all have been arguing about this. I actually would not marry you at this point. - I was gonna say that too. - I actually would not marry you at this point 'cause you-- - I was gonna say the exact same thing. - You want them likes, girl, you dream it. You are having nightmares about all the likes that you didn't get. It has to be that. You make a good point though about just like you're out wherever and people see him get done on one knee and strangers do for whatever reason record it. - They sure do. - Like I don't know why people do that. - Yeah. - But that is a good point and also I don't blame you for wanting to be cute and dull to for your engagement. You're gonna want to take pictures and stuff. I think that's fair, but it just seems like you're being like, no, not fair. No, not at this time. No, figure it out. It had better be a surprise bitch. - Like. - Why don't y'all have an engagement suit, photo suit? - Yes. - Where he's down on one knee and the pictures and everything, the background. Everything is what you want to be. Since y'all are already engaged. Why don't y'all just do that and then proceed with the wedding planning and all this. Sounds like this is legit getting in the way of y'all building up like this. - It does, which is so silly. - Yeah, it don't have to be like this. - Because like Crystal said, it's you won't, you're thinking about what other people are thinking. You're thinking about the excitement behind posting this huge moment for you. And so like, that's fine, but just go in with that. It doesn't have to be a mystery thriller, romance, crazy stupid love. Like, it doesn't need to be that. Especially when you have a bridal shower and you have a wedding, you have all these other things that you're going to have pictures and glam and stuff for anyway, girl. Just, yeah. - That may I love you, Chris. I'd been just like, girl, well, you tell me when you're ready because I'm there. - And how much of a surprise could it be if y'all had already talked about getting married and you knew a proposal was on the way? And that's actually what I would prefer to do. Don't ask me how to know where to marry you and we haven't had that conversation. Because you're going to get a less way until we get to the house and talk about it. - Horror story. (laughing) - True blood. You've got to get embarrassed on this jumbo charm. Don't do that. (laughing) - Yeah, don't you ever do that. Don't ever do that. - But I'm not quite so picky about the rest of it. So, if I were you, I would book an engagement photo shoot and have my dream moment there and let it go. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because if he's paying off the, well, he might don't want to pay for that because he's paying off the bill C. So, he's the only one working. You trying to get y'all to pay for that? - So then, if he don't want to pay for all that then, this is why women need to have that y'all. This is why you need that. - And this is why Tim Cook tells you every year that the latest iPhone has the camera. (laughing) Maybe you better get your 1399 and a fucking tripod. (laughing) You better set up that little timer that looked 10 second time, and you think it's better get in position. - That's right, auto focus, there's (laughing) Porsche mode, no, there you have it. - Or even, you know, dress up, go to a nice dinner, a nice restaurant. He can tell the waiter, this is common shit. And then the waiter's there. All they slide the ring in on your dessert and they take picture, like it, oh, oh, I don't. - I, again, I really don't get it. Like, in general, don't get it. I feel like the proposal, in my mind, is always, like a spontaneous, sometimes fun, intimate thing. And you put the bells and whistles on this. - Yes, on every thing on there. - Right, as long as we've had the conversation and we've agreed that marriage is where this relationship is going, you can propose to me at a Liberty Gay. Like, I don't, the rest of that, I'd do exactly. - Let's just make sure we're on the same page 'cause you might be thinking marriage and I'm thinking in two weeks, this relationship is over. So, less than 1,000. - We're aligned. - 1,000%. - And you could propose to me in the lobby at that point. 'Cause. - I'm so serious. - 'Cause one thing about me, since I have a job and I can make my own decisions with money, I'ma have my engagement photo shoot and my party and my bridal showers in different cities so that all my home girls can make it and my wedding and my reception with the two drum have all that shit that I want. 'Cause I have a job and I can. - Remember when, remember how home girls just a couple of weeks ago who wanted a specific nanny or cleaners for the house. - Oh, yes, she wanted a cleaner. - And she make more in two times for her nico-make and she was like, oh, he doesn't want us to get this. He doesn't want to get that. - She probably on maternity leave. - When you make your call. - Right now, I want her to write. Soon as that baby get off your nipple, write us back. (laughing) - When you make your call. - It's like when you do make back home. - You can make your own decisions, yes. But I feel that nigga, the photo shoot is at 11 a.m. - Girl, the last thing I would be doing is pressing this nigga about it, honestly. But good luck. Good luck. He has a lot of patience. 'Cause I would have been told you to shut the fuck up about this. - Hair, nails, hips, breasts, location. - Magic hour, that nigga was like, and flop. And she told him, do it again. - Do it again. - And he's still with you. - Be sure you better hurry up and marry that nigga. - Girl, girl. - Dear Chrissy Kid Fury, I need help figuring out whether to tell my friends something or leave it alone. - Probably do. - I don't have a ton of clothes. (laughing) I don't have a ton of clothes friends ever since moving to a new city a few years ago. But one of my closest friends in the city I live in has a boyfriend and he has been sending me the wildest text messages. - Of course he has. Long dramatic paragraphs, talking about how beautiful I am, how he'd ask me out if we were in another dimension, how I'm a queen from a man's perspective, all while saying that he loves his girlfriend, AKA my friend. - Call the police. - It's giving. (laughing) - Call. - You said I'm writing a special big statement. - Call the B.A.U. - Oh my God. - Call the B.A.U. - Call the B.A.U. - He's also sent me details about the smut book he's writing. And in the same breath, ask if I had any ideas for how he should propose to my friend. The mental gymnastics are wild. And just to give you an idea of how far he takes it, the last message is said, if you guys shot dead in the street, and I never told you how I felt, that would make me sad. Like, sorry, be serious. She knows he texts me, but claims that she doesn't know what we talk about. And if she ever found out he was sending me stuff like this, I'd know she would crash out. She's already a little possessive and her mental health hasn't been great lately, so I'm scared saying something will make things worse. At the same time, is starting to feel shady for me to stay quiet. I haven't entertained anything on my end, but I don't like being in the middle of this. Should I tell her or just stay out of it? Thanks so much. Love you guys, parallel universe queen. This nigga's a deep weirdo. I'm gonna have to agree with Kanye authority's ASAP. What? So you don't like being in another dimension. But you don't know if you should say something. Sweetie, the longer you take to say something, the longer you are going to exist in the middle of it. You understand that, right? This person isn't just sending you messages that are inappropriate. He is, and I am very serious. He's sending you messages that I find alarming. It isn't just, "Oh, you're beautiful and sexy, and in unparalleled universe, I'd ask you out." That gives me like, you work a regular nine to five, you do slam poetry on the weekends, you probably like, paint in battery park and give it away, or some shit, but like, that's fine. You're still, that's still grounds for me to go to my friend and be like, "Umm, so. " It's getting bizarre over here, girl. Your man is calling me beautiful and talking to him about the MCU, so I don't know what you want to say. - 'Cause what does that mean? You would ask me on another dimension. What the fuck are you talking about? - Okay. - In the bin. (laughing) - Then, if I got shot and dead and died. - Oh, yeah, oh, yeah. - And you know, okay. - Now, this is you has come to a close. I believe the series is finished. And there's no need for a reboot. Not this dance. So what's going on? Like, bitch, not only would I show my friend this, I would charge my iPad and show it to her on that. - Yeah, ooh, yes. And tell her, since I know you, things have been half you lately, I tried to just kind of let this rock, like, you know, your man's a little weird. He writes fanfiction and shit. - Yeah. - You know, I'd let people be neurodivergent, but it's crossing a line and I'm uncomfortable, and so I want you to know, like, the type of stuff he's been saying to me. I was trying to be considerate, but at this point, it feels like it's something I need to share with you. - At first, when you told me that he makes his own socks, I was just like, okay, he's quirky. (laughing) - A lot of niggas are darn good, but. - Girl, baby. - It's strange. He would ask me, I'm a queen from a man's place. - What the fuck is that mean? - And sprinkling in, oh, I love my girlfriend. Oh, you're so sexy. I would love to see your pussy glistening the moon light, but how also do you think I should. (laughing) - You think adding these little random shits in between takes away from the creepiness of your messages? - What I tell you, I'd be like, Ashley, I'm a hold your hand when we go through that. - Like you did, oh girl, you have a finger. - She says, she cried every time she watched "Bats." I was. - I couldn't take that. - That way. - And I'm so glad you all followed up with that. 'Cause I said, how? Wait, what scene? What scene? - That was so funny. - That whole video, I was Amber, that whole video, that whole video. (laughing) - You really were. - Amber was just like. - I was. - She was not. - You played for me with this? (laughing) - Withなくnet bullshit. - And Andrew. - Like, well, you're talking about rent. - She wasn't. - She was like, "Yo, I don't know. "I don't know. "I'll just sit up here and I have to be around." - Yeah. - I had to be like, "No, the need to go see." I just don't like it. - I just don't like it. You said that about a lot of shit. You said that about wicked. - And y'all brought. Yes, y'all talked about it. Anyway, anyway. Y'all need to go watch that video if you haven't already. - I don't grab it. Shit was fun. - But yes, like, I would honestly be holding her hands and just be like, "Girl, the FBI is already on the way." So, like, we don't even have to. But I just wanna let you know that I'm here for you. And we're gonna get these kids. - Yeah. 'Cause the ending is weird. If you. Why would you say if you got shot in the street and why wouldn't you say. Why would you just say if something happened, I would regret not expressing how I really felt? Like, why wouldn't you say it that way? Why would you say if Donald Trump walked up to you on Fifth Avenue and blew your brains out, I would just be devastated that I never told you how parkier titties are. Like, what? Why would you say it in the creed? - You're already a sci-fi nerd. Why couldn't you have just been like, if you blipped to another Earth far, far away? If the quantum star Felix exploded in that it's supernova, like, Thanos snapped the mine stone from your head. - Like, it's nerdy, yes! - You were brutally stabbed to death in the back of an army. (laughing) - You're a bitch. - I can't find my body in the woods. That would be inconsolable. Mimdani, you know what? Yeah, actually. - Mdani. - Yeah, CSI, Mimdani. At this point, I need to go check your back, y'all. - Get her! - Excavating some shit. - Come get her. - You're weird. You're weird. - I hope I didn't. - That hurt for a shout. - Yes. - Let her crash out. You don't want her to crash out. You don't want her to be sad. It's worse that her man is going around acting like this with her friends. - I would be worried for her safety, my safety, the safety of certain animals. - Yeah. Okay. - I'm so serious. - I'm actually deadass. This person's odd. - Why would you send me excerpts of the smut book you're writing? I'm the friend of your fiance, third girlfriend. You thought it was appropriate to share sexual content that you wrote with me? In what dimension, not this one, in the same dimension where it would be appropriate for you to ask me out. It would be really, really sad to me if you ended up decapitated somewhere. Anyway, here are some moods. I drew some porn. - I don't know, hinted. - I want her at the end of the afternoon. - I want her at the end. - Yeah. - Get her out of here. - Sorry, he's so weird. He's weird, girly pop. - You need to tell your friend this, A, set. I understand you having concern for her mental state and her reaction. To things and I honestly believe I have faith that y'all can work through that is for her. But even if this wasn't super like creepy, it's still inappropriate and she knows. She has the right to know. And you also hit something on the head when you said it's getting to a point where it feels shady because it is because you're keeping something from your close friend. Get it out there, get through the hard part, and then to have an investigation started because I think it's weird, girl. Yeah, it is hard to, it's hard now because your conscience is whipping y'all ass because you know if it was you, you would want your. This is wrong. This is wrong and you're not participating in the wrong, but you're allowing the wrong to have without saying something to your friend. So you are complicit in that way. That's why the guilt is beating y'all ass. So despite you might be legitimately afraid or wary of how she'll react, but you should still say something. If only so you can sleep at night knowing that you have washed your hands of that weird nigga. And you've gotten hurt to a safe house. And she can, you know, she can process. And I'm still going to bed with a combat knife on my dresser for at least three minutes. I'm sorry, it's something about this nigga that really gives me the creeps. Like, I don't get it. Anyway, um. Queen in a minute, a queen from a minute girl. Why are you even talking to me like this? Why are you even speaking to me in this way? Jesus, I don't know what it's like, man, just stop. Like, just stop. Take a day off. Oh yeah, no, they're not going to do that. Make a sandwich or just take a day off. One with a sandwich. She could be so good. God, I'd like, what do y'all be thinking? Yeah, good luck, uh, parallel universe queen. Let us know how the breakup goes. That's going to wrap up the letters this week. If you have a question for us, send it on over to asktheredagemo.com.