108: Before the Confetti with Rob Riggle | Soder Podcast | EP 106

Hey guys, this weekend I am in Missouri. Friday, the 21st, I'm going to be at the Uptown Theater in Kansas City, Missouri. Saturday, I'm going to be in St. Louis at the factory. December 5th, that's a Friday, Vancouver, Canada. I'm going to be there. It's close to sold out, but we're at the Vogue Theater. Saturday, December 6th, Eugene Oregon. I know it's the big 10 championship. I hope your Oregon ducks are doing great. Off chance they're not, or the games earlier in the day. Why don't you come to the McDonald Theater in Eugene, Oregon. December 13th, Royal Oak Michigan, Royal Oak Theater. I'm coming back, baby. I'm very excited. It's the last show of the year. We're going to have a hell of a time. December 13th, Royal Oak Michigan, DanSotar.com for tickets. Don't fuss around with those other websites. Go to DanSotar.com, get your tickets from there, and I'll see you in Royal Oak. You're going to turn around and be a senator. You're going to turn around and be like, I was going to do my closet. I guess it doesn't matter anymore. It really, honestly, I think now we need to start looking like, you know, everyone tries to push John's to work to run for president. Yeah. I think there is like a thing where we go, well, we've been watching you for 20 years. Yeah. So I like, we know you. Yeah. I think that is the new value that Trump proves with politicians is if you know a guy a long time, it's less a politician and more your buddy running for office. Possibly. Yeah. You might be right on that. And I think you're, they always say like written name recognition alone alone alone. And we are America is built on brand name recognition. It's the thing we do better. You've been all over the world. The thing we do better than anybody. We do a lot of stuff. Great. I think we do brand name. Come on. Branding. Marketing. You can't even touch us. London, you're catching up. Yeah. Everybody's light years behind us. Maybe the Japanese are starting to get. I would say they do cooler branding. Yeah. But they don't do it better than us. We are. We win on volume and quality and quality. You know what I think it was is remember that old cartoon of like, let's all go to the lobby. Yes. I think that in a, in a long form way made us think of like Coca-Cola as people and stuff. Really like, no, they sing and dance and they go. There is something. I don't know what it is, but there's something to what you're saying with regard to repetition and all because like a sitcom, right? Yeah. You watch friends for 10 years. Yeah. And like, we work in the business, so we can obviously separate things. For a lot of people like, no, those guys are my friends. Yeah, they feel connected to them as if they're a family. But that's because you invite them into your house. Well, what I love about, you know, I've been a fan of yours for years and everything you've done from, you know, the daily show on to, you know, obviously step brothers and stuff like that. But what I love about you is that there is this, there's goofiness that if you don't know you're playing a character, you probably seem like a wild human being. You know, it's like, if they don't think of you as just Rob Riggle, who's a man? Right. Just a guy. Just a guy. He's doing comedy. Right. And I've heightened it for a reason, for comedic effects. People are like, well, I was going to, you know, I was going to ask you to say some comments, but I don't know if I can trust you. I'm like, well, why? I'm a professional. If anything, you think I'm going to screw up your bed? If anything, I know how to navigate this. You know, Colbert was saying that now that his show's getting canceled, he said, I might go back to the character. And you're like, I bet there will be a group of people who do not realize he's gone from a character to himself back to a character. No, that's the thing. I think that's now the character he did on the co-bearer show. Yeah. On Comedy Central. Yeah. The co-bearer reporting people. I think there's a, I mean, this is going to sound very conceited. I don't mean it to sound that way. But certain people have levels of comedy knowledge and comedy expertise. You can see the subtleties and the sarcasm. And you can, like, we can see those things. Oh my god. And it's a dial for us. It's like, oh, yeah, yeah. For some people, they're like, I totally agree with everything you just said. They're very literal people. Well, there were. The more I meet these literal people, the more I'm just shocked because I'm almost like, it's a bit. That's the, that's the, I get, I get, I have to remember people don't realize we're doing bits. It's a bit. It's a comedy bit. It's an element of feeling like the twilight zone. It is. There you go. We'll see. I grew up and I still am a huge professional wrestling fan. And so there's this comedic k-fabe that happens. Where you kind of go, well, there are people even in 2025 that believe that wrestling is real. They want that to be. On some element of them wants it to be just like those people who watch soap operas. Yeah. And they want the, they're like, no, doctor, whatever. Yeah. Remore. There are, there are people. You know, when I was on billions, people thought I was just like a finance, bro, they have no idea how stupid I am. They have no idea that mathematics is easily my biggest. You're not stupid at all. It's very savvy. But you talk about finance. But I'm just talking about they were like, finance, right? And you're like, Oh, brother, I don't know how taxes work. I understand the idea of it, but I still don't know. But that's what I mean. I don't know how to win at it. Yeah. People, I understand the concept. I understand why we do it. But I don't know where it goes sometimes. Sometimes I don't. Yeah. But there are, there are, that is like a very weird thing where like you're you're going to be, you know, you're shaking hands and going to these balls next thing. You know, they're like, you just got sworn in. And you're like, how the hell did I end up here? I wish. I wish not to run, but I'm saying I wish public service wasn't so bad right now. I mean, it's we need good leaders. And our best leaders are not taking the job. Why would you? You've become an instant pariah. Can I tell you what we need to do is we need to bring nerds back to politics? Okay. Because do you remember? I was a poor student. I liked drugs. And I remember the kids that always ran for student government. I trusted even when I was young. There was this feeling of like, well, if you want to do that shit, go ahead. There wasn't anything cool about it. There was nothing cool about it. And then you go, that's what you need to do. You need to dorkify it again. So that that's like paperwork. Yeah. I think I want to when I look at anybody, if I look at my doctor, my dentist, my representative, I want to believe that that's all they do and all they care about. I don't. They're not doing it as a side gig. Yeah. They're not doing it to to climb a ladder or to position. They're doing this because that's what they want to do. And they love it. I don't want to have my teeth being worked on and hear her go, what's up, chat? Yeah. Well, we got going on in the chat. And then Shakira comes into singing new songs during a stream while I'm getting a root canal. The best dentist I ever had was here in New York City. The best dentist I've Paul Shear recommended him to him. Okay. I went to him. Pain-free dentist. And he read it every, but he loved, he loved talking about what he was going to do to my mouth. Oh my god. I was like, I'm down. I'm so down for this. What do you mean? He'd be like, like, well, he didn't have the look on his face. I'm a fuck. Yeah. That's what I was wondering. Yeah. Because I'll tell you tone really shifts that entire situation. You go from being like, that would be the most intimidating. Don't touch my fucking teeth. I mean, why don't you step back? You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna get in there. I'm gonna look at it. I saw your mouth close to TV out. I was on the waiting room. I was watching you and I was like, I'm gonna put something on those teeth. You're never gonna forget. Mr. Riggle, you are going to go, yeah, you are. No, don't do that to me. I was told you're pain-free, sir. Oh, you don't even know. It's just the pain I can't. Yeah. I got a charge for that. As he's injecting Novacaine. So was he just did it well? A good dentist is. He did it well. He, my lower jaw doesn't take the Novacaine that quickly or that well. Yeah. Like, you can give me a couple shots up here. It's work all day. Yeah. Down here, it didn't, it never took. And so they would give me a shot. They'd start where I go, ah, you know, I'd say, stop. And then dentist, I could see roller eyes and go, okay, fine. And then they give me another one. And they go, that's two. You should be dead. Yeah. Yeah. And I would still feel. So I keep complaining. And they'd be like, this is crazy. You know, you're being a baby basically. So I was like, maybe I am being a baby. This guy, he was like, how about now? I was like, I still feel it. How about now? Still feel it. He just kept, you know, tell us like, I got nothing. He's like, let's go to work. That's great. Yeah. So he goes, you don't even, I took the bottom jaw. That's the thing you don't even know. It's gone over here. Hello. Hello, idiot. I'm holding your jaw. That is, that's what you do. But no judgment either. Like, he was like, we're going to go with, I will keep doing this until you don't, until you're comfortable until you don't feel it. Good bedside manner is feeling like you got a teammate. Yeah. Like I'm just here to help you. The worst dentist I ever had was in New York City. And it was in Queens and Astoria and the guy in Astoria, you know, passed a certain part. It's like row homes, but they're also businesses. So you go to just this house, right? That's always interesting. And then I walked in. And I'll tell you what, it wasn't the house that bothered me. It was very nice when you got inside. You realized that it was an office and actual dental office. The guy came around the corner way too spray-tanned in like scrubs and just did he have jewelry? He had a necklace. Okay. He had a necklace. I didn't look at the hands. because there was gloves on it. But he was way too like New York. He was too queen. He was like, "Hey, down." He's like, he's like, he's like taught, you know, in my mouth, and he's like, "Shall I owe you a fan of?" I'm like, "The porn writer." And he's like, "Nah, you guys, your run game's not that good." And then he didn't, it felt like he just went like, boop, boop, boop, boop. Oh yeah, you're good to go. And I went, I don't know, I don't know, dentistry, but that didn't feel like you didn't feel right. That felt like, I went to him twice and then I was like, I'll just wait. My parents charming is out there. It's like when you go to a jiffy loop. Yeah, yeah. And you leave the car. And they come back and they go, "Yeah, it's all done." Yeah, I'm like, I've been looking at it. I feel like you guys, we're underneath working. We're underneath. They definitely jiffy looped. He did it, jiffy looped clean, where he just was like, I don't know, it's good. Sky doesn't even know what's going on, that he doesn't know what a bicusp it is. I could do this all day. I don't even actually look at their teeth. I've been wanted by the Gambino family since '87. If my being a truth be told, it's my brother, the dentist. I'm not even a dentist. I just take your smocks. I come down here, I poke around a little bit. I go back upstairs, whatever. I got a sauce going, I got to go start. You get the go. Don't eat sweets. What are you a child? You leave and you go. It is good, dental. That's all. Just a New Yorker breaking your diet down. What are you, fucking six? Stop eating candy. He goes, "Ah, just eat. I got a sauce." He goes, "I'm not even a dentist." "I'm not even a dentist." Yeah, ask me. I mean, times you brush a day. You're like, "Hoo!" Now I have a great one. I have a great one in Midtown, and she's nice, but also it's like I was raised by a single mom, and it reminds me of the same energy, where she goes, "What? What?" You're like, "My tooth hurts." And she goes, "Okay, okay. Come here." And then she goes, "Okay, what?" There's something comforting for you. It is. It's the energy. It's the way that you like that the guy was like, "Yeah, I want to get in there, fucking hell." Well, fucking hell. I don't know what your problem is. We're going to lock that down. I'm going to wait to touch your teeth. Grit spit and never quit the book, "The Marine's Guide to Comedy and Life Out Now." Yes, okay. Go by Robert Gilles' book today, on Veterans Day, when you joined the Marines, was it right out of high school? No, I was a sophomore in college. Really? Yeah. My friend Tom did that at the University of Arizona. Can I tell you something? That's a way that I always thought was super patriotic because I've known Tom's at sixth grade Pop Warner football. And he was just like at University of Arizona and then he's like, "Hey, I'm joining the Marines." And I was like, "Oh, okay." It's a bold choice. You go like, "It's a bold choice." Yeah. Because you can't. The first thing, this is, I'm talking about when Tom did this, this was '03. Okay. Oh, that's right. That's right when things were. I go, "Yeah." Yeah. Yeah. Like people, he signed up a game time. Yes. People don't realize, I was 18. I graduated high school in 2001. So when September 11th happened, that was like a lot of my friends that joined out of high school. Right. We're like, "Okay." Because a lot of them were like, "Yeah, what am I going to go to a parking garage in Germany for six years?" And then they're like, "Okay." Yeah. Okay. And then things changed. Things changed. Yeah, it's game time. Yeah. So when Tom signed up, it was, I believe, right before the, yeah, right. Yeah. Right before the Iraqi invasion. Yeah. It was, I want to say, it might have even been after. Yeah. I think we invaded April 03. Yeah. Iraq. Yes. So that's what it was. It was after that. Yeah. And then he spent time over there and he let a team. I don't know if there's Marines or Army. I don't want to fuck it up. Tom, I'm sorry. I'll see when I come to Chicago. But it was one of those things where you're like, when you're in college and someone joins you go, "Fuck." All right. Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of things, stories that I always hear and I'm like, "Wow, okay. Like the Pat Tillman." Yeah. You know what I mean? I mean, I went to University of Arizona and I think Pat Tillman is an American hero. I hope the sun doubles lose every game they ever play. But I think Pat Tillman is an American hero. See you're welcome. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Dude, let's go. Let's go Arizona. Let's spend a lot of money to go to school there. All on loans. I took my HBO special and seven seasons of billions to pay off. I've not been to Arizona, but I mean, Arizona University. Yeah. But I've heard nothing but good things. It was great. I just got to do a show in Tucson at the Realtown about a month ago and it was fantastic to go back there and I walked around school and it was like, "Man, those are children." Like, you just go and you're like, "This is a giant daycare center." Exactly. I know. I went to the University of Kansas and I go back home. All right. We had a rivalry with you in basketball when I was at school. Well, heck yeah. Because you guys are awesome. And so is so, I don't know. This is when you guys had Kirk Heingritt and Collison. I don't know. But we were down 20 and Kansas, these are great basketball school. It's a good school. It's a good basketball school. We, you know, I think there's certain universities and everybody's had this thing, right? Yeah. And you're lucky, actually, because you actually have football and basketball. It's switched. It goes. It ebbs and flows. Yeah. It depends. It always depends on who the football head coach is, but basketball at Arizona stays baseline. Pretty good. Pretty good. Yeah. And I think there are certain places like Michigan has the big house in football, right? There are certain cathedrals to the sport. And I think Allen Fieldhouse at the University of Kansas is definitely one of those cathedrals. It is a sport. I would put it up there with the Coliseum for USC, Notre Dame, Big House. I mean, there's so many legendary places for sports. You know what's weird? Is college baseball's never gotten the run to get that kind of like, I always remember as a kid watching it. Yeah. You know, in the summer. Yeah. And it would always be able to link into Nebraska Omaha. Yeah. The Nebraska, the College Road series in Omaha. And there was usually the same cast of characters would be Arizona, it was always be in it. Always. You're Oklahoma schools. And then I'd see see like an Alabama or for the state, for the state was great. Yeah. And it's always, it never got the like push that basketball and college football. I don't know. And it's America's past times. I don't know. It's great. I don't understand it. I will say this. I'll tell you a story. So Allen Fieldhouse, if you've never been, I say go because if you're if you're if you're a fan of the sport of basketball, especially college basketball, the jurors invented. Yeah. I think you got to go. You got to treat yourself to a game there. Yeah. Cause it is a special environment for basketball. So my girlfriend, Kasha, who's in the other room, she's a professional golfer. Okay. Roland. Okay. I went coach self, asked me to come back and host the Midnight Madness practice, right? Which K used a big deal at Arizona at the Macayles Center. It's a big deal. It's a big imagine. It's a nuts and Duke and midnight basketball means they can open for practice. Yes. It's the first practice. You know what you do though? The recruits come out and dunk and students get so jazzy. Yeah. Dude. Fresh rain software. You're going to Midnight Madness was. Midnight Madness. Yeah. field house. It's, you know, laser lights, smoke. They do all the light creates the string. It's like that like the show of the videos. They made these videos and highlight reals. Yeah. It's electrified, right? So I come out. I'm hyping the, you know, it's everything you'd hope it'd be, right? Yeah. And I go sit down next to her and she kind of looks at me and she's, you know, dazed, you know, and she, she goes, you do all this for amateur sports. That's so funny. And I had to go, "Oh, baby, let me explain how it works." Sure, it's their cold amateur sports. But in her mind, she was like, "This is crazy, like you guys do this for college kids." Yeah, the college athletics, I think this is the only country where it's like a huge business and thing and like culture. It's a huge culture. It's a culture, for sure. And you grew up in Kansas, I grew up in Colorado. When you grow up in the South Midwest, anywhere, you know what? I hate to say this Northeast, anywhere but the Northeast, college football is much more important. It is. I came to New York and no one gave a shit, they're like, "Hey, we got Rutgers." And you're like, "No, no, no. What about Saturday morning?" He's waking up. What about the tailgate? What about the whole day, the whole Saturday, the day bus? It was. It all matters. drinking virgin football and but also just college football like from the time I can remember being little waking up and seeing like a random and I grew up in we both grew up in big 12 yeah area so watching like a random Oklahoma state versus like Kansas state being like I love this but that's the thing like I I have great great memories of going to big 12 games. Yeah. Whether it was, you know, because I had friends where we'd drive down for Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, Bedlam, you know, one of those games, right? Or whatever. But if we went to KU, KU game, you know, there's a tailgating element, you know, you have a couple of bloody marries, you're grilling some meats, you're eating, you're having a couple beers, it's time to go into the game. Our football wasn't that great. So by half we're out of there. Yeah, yeah. You know, but we, you know, you go over to the wheel or to a bowl, you know, to a bar, and you, you know, keep drinking and socializing. And just that afternoon autumn buzz, yeah. I mean, nothing better. I don't think there's much better. I hope when I go to heaven, that's part of it. That's the feeling, the walk around feeling. That's the biggest assumption I'm getting at. But walk around feeling as God goes pretty nice, huh? It's day buzz. Yeah, day buzz. You can how much yeah, and by the way no sleepy afternoon. Yeah, you like that smoky smell of burning leaves in the background It's pretty cool. That's awesome. Yeah, it's not a stroke. Yeah, there are no strokes here. That's fun There is I remember even not even going to gain not even going to game. but like being in college or waking up in a friend, hurting from the night before and being like, "Hey, I got breakfast burritos and some beers, Oklahoma's playing Texas." And you go like, "Yes, yes." And then you find out an afternoon game. When I moved to New York, I had a friend from Colorado move out and move in with me. And he was like, "Where's the college football?" And I was like, "Our apartment." And then we would just drink it on Saturdays. We would get, I wasn't getting spots yet. So I was like, if I wanted to go do spots, I had to go out and do a bar show and stuff. So on some Saturdays I'd go, let's just throw the whole Saturday away. Yeah, they'd just like drink and watch college football, clear into the night. I remember those days. I really do when you, Saturdays were just dedicated to watching football and having a couple beers, nursing the hangover from the night before. Maybe if you were really motivated, you might go play some golf, maybe not. Great, I know, but when I was in New York, I remember there was a sports bar up on the upper east called Ship of Fools. And they had like 16, 20 televisions going. So you could catch games from all over the place. I go up there and just have some chicken fingers and some beer and find a nice little booth. Did that become cooler? I'm assuming this is when you, now when you moved here was for SNL. No, I moved here as a Marine. I was on active duty. Really? I worked in Midtown and the public affairs office. No way. And I took my first stand up class. I didn't know how, I just knew I wanted to do comedy. Sure. I didn't even know how to begin. I really knew nothing. And you were stationed here. And I was stationed down in North Carolina and I was getting out and I was going to move to Chicago to study at Second City because I heard that's what you should do. So I was like, okay, that's what I'll do. And then the Marines said, well, would you consider staying in? And I said, I didn't want to tell him what my dreams were because they would have probably been like, what the fuck? So I was like, you were the one, yeah. Oh no. You should have told us that much earlier. We wouldn't have let you near half the stuff. We like it. You have no business. Yeah, you were around some dangerous equipment. I didn't know you had silly brains. Exactly. You got to know about the yuxomatic. So I, I just said, I've got some opportunities in Chicago. I don't want to pursue, but thank you very much. They said, well, what would it take? I said, well, if you can get me to New York or Los Angeles, because to be honest with you, I was going to move to Chicago and be a bartender and a waiter and try to do comedy. That's what my goal. Yeah. So they said, well, if they can get you to New York or LA, I said, I would stay. The next day they called my bluff, I had orders to New York City. So I figured, well, I was a captain. I might as well get paid as a captain. Great. And have, you know, moved to New York. Benefits? Benefits, everything. So I would do three years more here, as a captain of Marines during the eight to five, you know, in Midtown. And then at night, I'd go do comedy. So when I got up here, first thing I did, I went and found a sports bar, a ship of fools in my neighbor. There you go. And then they had a rugby team. That was the New York rugby club. So I ended up playing rugby with those guys. And I, 'cause I knew no one when I moved up. Great way to get in there. I knew no one. And I met a bunch of really nice guys and people. So I, like, had friends pretty quick. And was part of that group for a while. And then I realized, hey, I came up here to do comedy. That's what I came here to do comedy. So quite literally, on the way home from ship of fools to my apartment, I walked right by comic strip live up all up east. And there was a little sign that said, classes. And so I went, I got to start somewhere. So I signed up for classes. And I took eight weeks of classes with, you know, was it a DH-Sweeney? Is that his name? Oh, no, a DH-Sweeney. I know that name. But there was another woman teaching it when I moved here. But I know what you're talking about. I know it's a class you're talking about in comedy. I think DH-Sweeney was over it. Yeah. He was like, he's like, we do three jokes per minute here. Set up punch, set up punch, set up punch. Yeah, it became more of a, of when I moved here and, like, the odds, it became more of, like, a, if you sign up here, I can maybe get you spots on real shows. It wasn't, like, it became more of, like, a hustle. Yeah, like, this feels hustling. So I went in, and I took these classes, and I hated the classes because I didn't realize how terrifying getting up on a stage was. Oh, and you had never done it at that point? You had never done, like, an open mic? Nothing. You know, and I was in the Marines. I had flown planes, I had deployed, I had done it. Yeah, you've done real shit. But this, I think being on stage, terrified me on a level I didn't expect. Like, real vulnerability, real fear. The kind of fear that when I finally got up to do my five minutes, I didn't bring anybody. Yeah, you know, I just, you know, you're supposed to bring two people. I didn't do, fuck that. I'm not bringing anybody to do this. No one's seeing me do this. Exactly. So I, I got up, I did my five minutes, and it was five minutes of jokes that I wrote that I hated. I hated the jokes that I wrote. I did not believe in them. It was because I did his formula of three jokes per minute. Well, I'm more of a storyteller, Eddie Murphy, Delarious, type, right? Yeah, you can't. I like to tell stories and do characters within the stories and animate myself and heighten them. Yeah. And without what had happened. It was three jokes per minute. So I'm right off. And that is a very old timey, like, cat skills, Borscht belt, like, you know what you got to do? You got to go out there and you got to talk to them. And what's funny is when that comes around in comedy, as far as like even streamers now will be like, we've noticed if you have three jokes a minute, prefer again, you go, let me figure it out. Let me figure out my own comedy. Let me, and I think that's what takes the time. That's it. And the repetitions is you have to find your voice. You have to figure out that doesn't work at all. This feels awful. And then you find ways that it doesn't feel awful or that it feels better or this works. And now I see what they meant when they said this. So anyway, I got up, I did the five minutes. It was like a car accident because I was in shock. I really was in a state of shock. Some of the flashlights on what's your name? I didn't hear, I couldn't hear the crowd because the pulp, the heartbeat. The heartbeat of my ear, the blood rush. I wanted to be off the stage the second I walked on, but I knew I had to power through. So it was like being in an accident. I was in a state of shock. Was there a part of your marine, and this is just as someone that's not been in the armed services or whatever, but was there a part of your marine that you knew like, all right, my, I'm having, you know, the fact that I got on the stage was all the Marine Corps. Right foot, left foot, 'cause mine was just straight booze. Like I just drank, I just drank a couple beers and I was like, I want to yell some shit at you. But I'm thinking in, you know, when you have these tools that you've developed in the Marine Corps, where you go like, all right, soldier, that's your heart beating, get it out of your ear. I wish I had that level of skill. Okay, and all right, the Marines did provide me with, you're not quitting and you're not backing out like a pussy. Great. So those two things got me on the stage. Big thing. 'Cause it left to my own devices. Yeah. I would have walked. Yeah, you're like, fuck this. I would have said, fuck this and I said, it's not the right time, it doesn't feel right. I would have come up with a thousand excuses. And you see people in comedy, do you? And the Marine Amy was like, go up there. Yeah. Take your fucking medicine. Yeah. And let's just get it over with. Yeah. And let's see what happens. Yeah. So I went up and I took my medicine. But I was never more petrified, never more in shock. So when I walked off the stage, here's the thing. I couldn't hear the audience. Sure. But I didn't even listen for a laugh. Like I knew I had five minutes to say, and I'm going to say it, and I'm going to get the F out of here. Yeah. So I said my five minutes and I got the fuck out. Yeah. On the way out. The guy goes, hey, well, don't forget your tape. And I didn't realize that they videotaped me. Yeah, I got that view. So I take the video tape. I got back to my apartment. I sat there and about two hours later, my adrenaline had cooked off. Yeah. And I was like, okay. I'm gonna watch this fucking thing and see what happens. I popped it in. It wasn't as bad as I thought. Now it wasn't great. It fucking sucked. But it wasn't the level of hatred that I thought was out there. Yeah. You watch and you go, oh. That's great. There was a couple laughs. There was a couple laughs that had I let it breathe. It might have done okay. But I was like, I started talking and drowned out the laugh. Yeah. I get this. Three minutes in. I get the street jokes in per minute. So I realized it wasn't that bad. But what I also realized was I hated that experience. I hated it so much that I thought I had made a big fucking mistake in my life. Is that the thing? It's like almost like in a sense post-nut clarity. Really like do it. And then you go like, oh, fuck, I promised a lot. I said, I love it. And you're like, I'm in New York now. I transferred here. I quit flying. I quit flying in the Marines to get on the ground. I took a, I quit my flight contra and I had my pilot license in college and everything. I quit flying so I could become a ground officer so that I could pursue comedy. And then you do it. And then I did it. Ski down. And then this was all sight unseen. I don't know what the fuck I was thinking. I just had a dream, right? And then I did it. And I realized I hated it with a, I mean, really hate it because I just, is there a panic that says it? Yes. A big panic. Like, I can't believe I gave up flying and I can't believe I gave up this whole thing to do this thing that I really didn't look into. I just had this dream in my heart that I wanted to do it. I felt like I belonged there. I felt like I should be doing it. So anyway, it was all sucked. Then I'm sitting there feeling sorry for myself and I had a conversation. Somebody, an old friend of mine, knew Dave Keckner. Yeah. And said, I mean, I have this comedy friend. Do you want to talk to him? You know, he might talk to. He's had a lot of success. So I was like, well, he's not going to talk to me and they go, yeah, yeah. So friends set it up. I call. Dave, Dave, I'm the friend of friends. - Yeah. - And he was like, "Oh yeah, we're gonna grab a coffee." So I was like, "Sure, oh my god, yeah." So I went and had a coffee with him. And he goes, "Okay, so walk me through. What's going on?" So I was like, "Oh, this sucks, I think I'm fucking out there." I used to be in the sky, I could touch God. And now I was just like, "What the fuck? I'm in the swamp with these clowns." What the fuck? - What the fuck? - Yeah. - Why did I do any of this? - He was like, calm down. He was like, "You're right where you should be. This is natural. You're not, you're not in crazy land. This is reasonable." - Just like being a good dentist. - Yeah, and he's one of teammates. - Yeah. - So I got my hand in your mouth and you're okay. - He heard that was great. And then he goes, he goes, "Well, there's a lot of avenues here. He goes, have you thought about improv?" And I go, "Yeah, but they don't have any in New York." And at the time, they didn't. - Oh really? - The only thing they had was Chicago City Limits, which is short form improv, like games and, you know, songs and stuff like that wasn't my thing at all. And he goes, "I got some friends from Chicago who just moved here." And he goes, they're starting a school and they do a show called ASCAT. They do a show every Sunday night. They call themselves the UCB upright citizen brigade. Go check them out. I think, I think that might be more what you're looking for. So I went down and saw the ASCAT show. This is Amy Poler, Matt Wall, Matt Besser. - I laughed when you went. - Oh, there's no improv in New York. That's how I went, like, well, yeah, there's a shit ton of improv. There's UCB, there's a thing. - Well, now there is, but back in 1997. - Crazy. - Because the UCB got to New York in '96. - And then they had that comedy central show. - Right, but that didn't start until, like, 1998, 1999. - Yeah. - So that's when that show was going. - That's when I learned about it. - Yeah. - And I didn't know they had, like, a whole school in shit. - That's the thing, like, I was so lucky. I was one of the first students they ever had. - Really? - Yeah, I mean, they had one class, I would say class, head of me, and then it was, like, my group. Which was, like, me, Paul Sheer, Rob Hubel, Jason Manzookis, Jack McBrayer, you know, that's just great comedians. But that was kind of my class. And then there was a whole other group behind us, the Zach Wood, and all these guys. - Imagine being the class before me. You go, "Well, we're just pretty good people today." (laughing) You're like, "Fuck, that's like a stack." That's like the, what draft class is that? Like the '96 NBA draft class? There's like a draft class that's like Kobe Steve Nash. - Yeah. - There was also a football one, like, an '83 with all the quarterbacks. - Oh, yeah, that was, they did the '30s. - The '30s. - Jim Kelly and Marino. - No, no, no. - No, no, no, no, no, no. - There you go. - And the chiefs took Black Lich. Anyway. - Yeah, oh my God. (laughing) - And, you know, I, because he won the national title that year. - You know, my favorite part of that documentary is, 'cause I'm a 49ers fan, is when they say, the cults called Bill Walsh, and they said, "What about we trade you L away from Montana?" And Bill Walsh said, "Let me call you back." And then he calls him back a little bit later, he goes, "I'm not done when Super Bowl's a jail yet." And then he hung up and I was like, (laughing) (laughing) "You got fucking three more." - He got, he got, he got, he got two more. - That franchise was run so well. - Ah, the Dabartolo, I got to meet Eddie Dabartolo, and I was with a friend, and my friend didn't realize why I was so excited to meet Eddie Dabartolo, and I was like, he was the reason the 49ers were a dynasty. He was just in fantastic ownership. There's a reason that every single 49er that has gone to the Hall of Fame during that time has had Eddie D give the speech to go in there. - I believe. - I believe. - Chiefs out, you know, the hunts, they're like, "Good ownership is. " - Good, that's the thing. People always think it's the team on the field. Of course it is. - Absolutely. - Absolutely. - But it starts at the top. - But the organization can make a big difference. - You know what's funny? - Yeah, York is the, you know, the controlling partners of the 49ers now, and he's like kind of like, I think either my age or a little bit older, watching them turn into a good owner has been awesome. - Yeah. - And you're like, I mean, you guys have gotten two Super Bowls on us. Did you go to both those Super Bowls? - I did. - So did I. - Yeah. - I was on the other end of that. - Sorry. - Did you go to the one where you lost to Philly? - I did. - Good. (laughing) - I'm sorry. - By the way. - I just needed you to handle it. - By the way, by the way. - The last three Super Bowls, I've been blessed to get to go to. So the one 49ers, that was-- - So you went to Miami in 2019. - I went to Miami in 2020. I did not go see the box ones. - I think there's like 10 people that did. - Yeah. - I think it was because it was locked down time frame. So, didn't see that one. - I went to your COVID. - Went to, I went to the 49ers one. - So you went to the one in Vegas. - And I went to the Eagles one before that. - The ones where in Phoenix. - Yeah. - Went to that one. - Yeah. - And that one, I enjoyed, I enjoyed the ones we went obviously because we won. But the Eagles, for whatever reason, I don't get like sweet tickets or-- - Yeah. - That's, I think that's, you know, more like, "Rud" and "Cadekis." Those guys get those tickets. - I guess the first graduating class you see me. - I'm more way out, you know what I'm saying? - We got wriggling. - I'm out, I do a spot, I'll turn tricks for Bud Light to get a couple tickets, right? - Well, that's kind of what happens to me. They're like, would you be willing to stand over here and fart in a cup? We'll give you two tickets, I'm like, done. - God, dude, I got a fart locked and loaded. The Chiefs fandom, comedically wise, it's great. It's you, Rudd, Keckner. - Stone Street. - Stone, Eric Stone Street. - Yeah. - For Modern Family. And Heidi Gardner. - Yeah. - From Minnesota. - My buddy, Robert Alberino, who you know. - Yes. - Worked at the Chiefs. - Yes, it was before the Niner guy. - Well, he went, Chiefs, he went Eagles, Chiefs, 49ers back to the Chiefs, and he's the best. Rob is the best. - Love working with him. - I'm gonna see him when I do my show in Kansas City. I love his family, he's unbelievable. Him going to the Chiefs the year they beat the 49ers twice, knowing how much he enjoyed it because of how it ended with the 49ers was so tough to watch a friend. Get genuinely like, you know what? Good for you. - Yeah, a little just. - A little just as. And then the second time I went, I'm not as happy for you. - Yeah, cool. - Second time easy, come down. - Okay, you gotta have trophy. You got a lot of rigs. And then now he'll be like, and I love Rob. Every time I talk to him, he's like, we gotta get you to a Chiefs game. I'm good. (laughing) I'm good. - Can I tell you, so I was down in New Orleans for this last Eagles Chiefs debacle. - Yeah, a great Super Bowl. - A terrible Super Bowl. - The only time in the world you ever hear me say, "Fly Birds Fly." - I was. - So we go to it, and truth be told, there was a vibe, I wasn't, I didn't like to vibe. - That's off. - But I'm also very positive, so I'm not giving in to the vibe. - Sure. - I'm just like, no, no, no. - You're milling it, you're trying to well it a little bit. - You try to well it. - Yeah. - Every person that's going to the Super Bowl, that is a real fan, not a corporate guy that got it 'cause they have a AI company that gave 70 million to something. I'm talking about the fans that go there are all on edge in a way that is hard to explain. - Right. - Everyone's doing that. - If I take this step right, we'll win. If I take this step right, we'll win. You're like, it's almost really everyone's doing it. - I would rather, and this sounds weird in a way, but I'll give me the loss at the wild card level. - Yes. - Don't let me get to the, don't let me almost taste the ring and then take it away. That's the hardest, the hardest. - I would say, you know, I went to the Vegas one, and I was with Michael Che, he's a 49ers fan. That was a very hard loss. - It was. - 2019, to me personally, I don't think I can feel a worse sports moment because I was there, but more importantly, I grew up with Mike McDaniel, who was the Office of Coordinator, or he's the Run Game Coordinator at the time of the 49ers. So my middle school best friend is the Run Game Coordinator of my favorite team. They lose in the Super Bowl and then you go to that after party. And you're like, did you go to the after party after they lost? - No, I retreated. - You didn't go. - You gotta go. If you ever get the opportunity. - Well, no, I went to the Chiefs Hotel. - Okay. - Because at New Orleans, Eagles had a hotel, the Chiefs had a hotel. I went to the Chiefs Hotel. So at least there was some red and some safety around. - Sure. - Because the Eagles fans were consuming the quarter. - Yeah, that's what happened to me in Vegas with you guys. It's just red and yellow. That my favorite was after Miami, after the day after Miami, I'm flying back to New York and there's Chiefs fans in the TSA line. - And when I'm wearing my 49er hat. 'Cause I'm not a fucking, I'm not scared. - No, no, you keep wearing. You don't take it off the next day. - I'm sitting there like this. - Yeah, winner lose. Winner lose, I'm with you. - I was sitting there with my 49er hat in the TSA. - By the way, I didn't shed a layer. - Yeah. - When I walked into the French Horde of that night. - Dude, this is the best. This was the best. - They're all, you know, all the Chiefs fans. - Yeah, I mean, can we be one? I mean, guys, why are we so fun? - And then this-- - I waited my whole life for that. - I waited that Miami was 50 years, yeah. - And I go, I told the way to the airport. I go, I hope you have to wait another 50. And then you guys just been on a roll since. But I was standing at that TSA line. And then I went, it's gone. And one of the TSA agents, old black dude, just like telling him, he's like, "Y'all look great last night." "Y'all look great." And then he sees me and goes, "I see you, big dog." Like that. And he goes, "I see you, Reppin." And I went, like, that he goes, "Stay strong." Like that, and it got me home. That was all I needed. And I was like-- - And he gets it. - Okay, I was like, I was just sitting there. Like, I fucking hate this. And everyone's like, "Oh, we're having so, fuck." - So I was at the New Orleans one. - Yeah, and we were never in it, right? - Yeah, the Eagles. - We were you guys out. - There was never more. I was like here we go every other one you guys have been in yeah has been a great game we just And all you know credit to the Eagles and their game plan all that we just were never in it We weren't in the game we just There wasn't even moment. We're like we got it some momentum or we had a couple play. We just weren't in it so again because I scrounged for tickets we were sitting in an Eagle section Oh, so I'm surrounded by Eagles fans and they're amped up. I will just say Some of my favorite people that I love more than family members I have friends that I go back decades yeah people that I I would die for Fuck that fan base man that fan base When you are going against them, you are just like stealer fans can get annoying. Yeah, it's fuck the Seahawks forever because I'm a 49ers fan Something about Eagles fans is they want to fight you Okay, so want to fight you that fill it Elf is yes Yeah, so it Elf is means it tame a level of like Yeah, fuck you. I'll throw something at you and you're like. I don't want that right now. Yeah, I'm watching the game Please, let me I'm processing on my own here, you know, so you're in the Eagles, right? And now cut to let's go back a couple years When we when we beat the Eagles in Phoenix. I was also surrounded by Eagles, right the whole first half to ride me We're down. I think ten points at halftime those in seriani was like yeah, so we're down ten and a half You know, I go to get a beer there. Well, you go baby. Oh, give me the hot Yeah, they're just loving it talk of that match it By the end of the game all everybody's gone. They all just vanished into the ether That's what you got to do and so it was it was a really nice moment for me. Yeah, you can well now cut to New Orleans And we're down there. We're never in the game. So it's just it's a never I never had a minute to cheer to be like all right Oh, you know suck it. No, no, it was a relentless barrage. Yeah, so I'm with my girlfriend I think that's the only reason they didn't Poor beers on my head or get fucking insane. We'll also your rob riggle. Well, I don't think that I think that made him more crazy. Yeah Yeah, you're the guy. I said fucking cover. I actually he's cocks doesn't feel like the Kelly to wine mixing And all I could do is sit because I had nothing to I couldn't push back I was a little feral told me to just like my team was just getting shellac so I was like oh, I have fucking I had to eat that shit Well, I think it was the fourth quarter 34 six. Yeah, and It wasn't getting better. In fact, they're getting more guest up the heat's getting more intense. So I looked at my girlfriend I said I go I think we need to get a beer. So I turn around every day and they're like, you know, they're giving me the hot stroke Double bird, you know And I go I need to get a beer to cool down some of these flames. Ha, ha, ha, you know, that's right. Motherfucker So, you know, I make nice and joky joke and we make our way up The stairs out the back down the stairs and all the way to the French I'm not looking back. I'm not looking back. Well, and it was the best choice. I made all night getting out of that is so in Miami The Super Bowl was in Miami. I was getting tickets through McDaniel the whole playoffs I went to every I went to the divisional game. I went to the NFC championship game all in San Francisco But he's the coach. They get access to tickets Super Bowl. His wife calls me and she's like she calls me and my friend Chad That we go to all the games she was like all of his games on your own Well, no, she went here's the team price point. Yeah, and we were like holy shit It was something like 4,000. It was something where you're I was still working for Fox NFL. Oh, yeah That was my that was one of my last years at Fox NFL So and Fox had the Super Bowl that year. That's why I was able to great That's what you need to find. Yeah, that's for people that want to know how to get Super Bowl tickets You need to find the way to go. You're like a sperm trying to get into an egg You just got to go like yeah, then I mean yeah because at the time Katie was still at ESPN And she was doing up she was doing stuff down in Miami. Sure for the whole week. That's right So she's down there and she's like and and I was like all right. Well, I'm gonna buy a She had a hotel. Yeah, so all I had to do was buy a flight and I'm like, well, I'm gonna fly down there Maybe and then she was like well, sometimes there's these parties that ESPN does And you go to it and the gift is tickets to the game And I was like, where is great? And then she calls me and she's like, I got you I got we got two tickets and I was like, how great is that call? It was unbelievable It was like it felt like old-timey where I was on the phone trying to get like a ticket I need the first flag down to Miami. Yeah, I'm going tomorrow. Yes, he yeah, I'm trying look at oh nonstop Express as fast as possible. I'm loading my suitcase. I'm just throwing suits in a suitcase But I wanted to get down there I call him a Daniel. I'm like, you know, I'm coming down. I got I got a ticket my friend Chad We ended up like he spent money to get it. He's like all right if you're going. I'm going fuck it And he bit the bullet bought a ticket. We all go down there They're in the 49ers section. Yeah with the families. Yeah Katie didn't realize I was in the chief section. Oh Hey, I've been their friend again. That's what I mean. You're talking about it. Yeah. Well I had two 49ers fans behind me. Okay. That was our little conclave. It was like our backs. Yeah We're back to back on every circle. Yeah, yeah, we're just like waiting around well I don't know if you remember that game, but we were up. Yeah, Patrick Mahomes had never thrown a Interception in the playoffs until that game. Yeah, then Fred Warner picked him in the third corner I got a little too excited. I stood up and I was like Fucking go now. I was like friend fucking Warner. Fred fucking Warner. And I was just like going nuts. Oh my god And then we're up. We're up like 20. We're laughing because I've been there. Yeah I've been there. What are you? We're so gassed. Oh my god. I just exploded. Yeah. I just explode. It's visceral. It's visceral. Yeah. And they're like And it's 26 16 Sheves come back. I forget what we were up 10. I forget what the exact goes and you come back. Yeah That big bomb to Teri Hill. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, which is great. I have a I have a story about that which is It was a third and 14 and he hit a hit Tyree kill on that route and it just opened it up You guys took the lead and then you scored that extra touch and go up and It the energy went from me standing to like the chiefs fans all going like And enveloping and Katie's bend. She's big Patriots fan from Massachusetts Patriots fans. She's been at Super Bowl's where they've won. She's been at Super Bowl's where they've lost. She was at the Philly one when they lost. She was at Seattle. She was the Atlanta one when they won She knows she's been there. She's my point person. Yeah, and she's in plain clothes. She's in she's a path's fan She's not wearing anything. She's wearing a leather jacket and jeans or whatever It's pretty obvious for now. She's gonna lose and she just calmly says to me. She says listen Best time to leave is right now. Yeah, you don't want to get hit with the confetti That's it and I went what she just you don't want to get hit with the confetti And we're walking out and as it happens. It was like Indiana Jones We're like getting out of the temple and it's like the confetti is coming down and we just will like you We just like what we're just like It's just like and I said the next year the next year are or two years later Eagles chiefs in Phoenix Shane Gillis and big Jay Okerson per Christchurch autumn tickets And they did his show with them. Oh awesome. So big Jay's like I would love to see that show big Jay's like I'm going through the game They're losing You guys are gonna win and I text Jay. I said just get out of there before the confetti Yeah, and then I saw him on Monday and he was like I got out of there before the confetti That's the only thing that matters. That's the key. Yeah, that's good advice. So it's funny about that Tyree kill play McDaniel got his friends and family We go to the Super Bowl party because you know a lot of people don't know this super bowls the teams have a party Winter loops. Yeah, they spend like $200,000 on these things and they have these like parties with them. They usually have like a name Musical act. Yeah, you know big big like some of the it's like oh shit. So for ours We go we get on the bus everyone is Silent. Yeah, you take a sad Quiet almost like hungover bus ride. Yeah, too. We were at the American Airlines arena was like this outdoor party or whatever And then the team shows up and they're sadder because they've just put their bodies on the line for this whole season And then I see my fucking friend And he's crushed and that we're sitting there and Katie and I talk about this all the time because we remember it We're sitting there eating tacos with Mike and Robert Salah who's now back as our decor. Yeah, and Robert Salah goes You know on that player Tyree got that first down We practiced that a couple times this week He goes we weren't supposed to bite on the fade route That's what opened up Tyree and I went oh, I don't want to hear about the plane You know, you're like but that and that kind of stuff as you know too just from what we do Those little moments Even if you prep and I they'll haunt you that's what it just you know you know about that place still haunts it I know if he's when the plane's taxing for takeoff yeah Even to this day he's glancing out the window and he's thinking why do they bite on that fade? We fucking talked about it And we had to safety they think about and that's and coaches. It's all they think about but I can still tell you plays from my high school football From my high school football that I'm like, you know what I blew that We should have believed it. We should have got that. Well, the and the best part is is they're sad and we're eating. And then you just hear, all right, ladies and gentlemen, keep it going for the jabber walkies. And they're just on the stage going like, oh, and it's all these NFL players. So Katie and I stood for it. We stayed for like maybe 20 minutes. Chad stayed and got hammered. It's just really shit. But the jabber walkies is so funny. I mean, talk about a tough gig to dance, just sad to the saddest people, saddest and maybe in all the world at that moment, they were just at the press. Yeah. They were on the cusp of legend. They just had to push open the gate to the problem. All they do is step forward. All Jimmy G had to do was hit that long throw. And then you guys are done. And we run out the clock. It was just that once, but dude, the next morning, I wake up and it's just blurry pictures and Chad's like, little Wayne was here and it's like four in the morning and you're like, there's no way I'll stay until four in the morning because they did. And that's what they should do is they should all get blind drunk and then wake up the next day and go fuck fuck. But when you go to Super Bowls, that's the worst part of going as a fan. You said it earlier and you said it beautifully and it's absolutely right, which is there is this nervous energy and what it is is everybody, both sides, pre-game. You're both so dangerously close to the one of the best highs you'll ever experience, or maybe one of the darkest lows you'll ever experience. Yeah. And so it's terrifying. It is because you're ever and there's and there's all these like big companies around and they're going like, try this new Bud Light Taco Bell and you're going like, uh-huh, fun, fun. Like I remember Che got us tickets in the Vegas one. And Marcelo Hernandez was there, but Marcelo got tickets also through NBC. But Marcelo was just going to Vegas to go to the Super Bowl and party. So me and chair like sitting there like, uh-huh. And he's like, you guys try this. He's like coming up. He's like, how great is this? And you're like, I'm so fucking nervous right now. I was at the chief's pre-game for all of them, but the last one in New Orleans. And I saw some old friends. I saw a couple of friends from high school. And they just like, you know, a lot of can't sit if I go down there. Sure. So I was chatting them up, but I really wasn't hearing what they were saying. It's like your first set. It really was. I was kind of like, uh-huh. Yeah. I just got to get in there. Yeah. I want this over with because I was also fighting the bad vibe I had. Yeah. And you know, and I'm like, nope, nope, nope. No. No. No. I'm like, in my mind, I keep screaming no. I said, I said, I said it. I went on Rich Eisen's show and I said this and I meant it. I'm never going to a 49er Super Bowl again. I'm o and two. I've had my opportunity. Had they been one and one? Had they had we beaten you in overtime? And won that game? Yeah. Maybe. Yeah. Maybe. But I will never go as a 49er fan. And I'm saying this, if you're a 49er fan and you have gone to both of those losses and maybe the Ravens loss. Yeah. Maybe you stay home. Yeah. Maybe you put that money towards a new TV. Well, and see what happens. See what, see what happens. Damn. Cause what if you win? Cause we win. Cause now you got a new thing going and then now we got it. Now we got a sixth ring. Exactly. Now we're back in it, baby. Exactly. Now we're back. Now it becomes the best Super Bowl party ever. This is what I'm saying to all the coolers out there. Realize you're a cooler. Just stay the fuck home. Stay the fuck home. Know yourself, man. And that's the first secret to success. Know yourself. This is exactly why. And that's what led you to UCB. Yeah. Fuck a stand-up class. Half the people teaching those classes suck ass. It's stand-up. So why you get to class from a guy who doesn't even know those you can't teach except an improv where they actually improv with you. So you know if they can do it or not. And then after I did all the improv, right? And that gave me, I learned so much. I grew through them. Then when I got on the daily show, I shared an officer John Oliver. So John is a dedicated, dedicated, uh, stand-up. Really a worksman. He's also coming from that UK style, which is, I'm going to write an hour in a year. Yeah. And I have a whole hour in a year. And I'll write on the stage. Yeah. He gets on the stage and writes. Yeah. John Oliver's, I did John Oliver's stand-up show on Comedy Central. And like watching him do like six different sets, you're like, holy shit. Yeah. Those guys are worksmen, right? They're, they do the work. So John, I would make him come down to the UCB and do monologues for the ask. Oh, yeah, because there's always a monologue that starts asking. And he, he'd never done that before, but he was smart enough and savvy enough and comedic enough to know how to tell stories. Sure. So he'd come down and do, he'd be the monologist for the, for the ask that show. Well, then he flipped it on me and said, now you got to come do stand-up with me. I got, dude, I, I tried it. And he got, yeah. Yeah. I don't care about your excuses. Yeah. We're going. Yeah. So we would get done with work at five. We would literally go downstairs. We get a slice of pizza each. Sure. And then we'd get in a cab and we'd go hit microphones. Yeah. We go to the slipper room. The piano room. Those are all great. Yeah. We go. We go every poetry club. Everywhere. They're all great. There was always a mic. We could find. Yeah. So we would go. And I, I was literally, I was like, I don't even know what to do. I don't have any material. He goes, he goes, he goes, just tell me one funny story. Can you tell me one funny story? So I was like, well, this happened today. You know, and I thought it was kind of funny. I told him on the cab ride down. He goes, well, that's what you're going to do. Yeah. So I was like, shit. So we get up first place. And I just tell the story. It's three minutes. He got some laughs. Sure. And that was it. I said, thanks. And I got off. We get back. We jump into another cab. We're off to the next place. And he goes, he goes, the story worked. He goes, it worked. I go, yeah. But it's just, it's a three minute at best story. And he goes, do you remember where they laughed? I go, yeah, he goes, keep those. He goes and then try to find a new point. So literally by the end of that first night, I probably had a minute and a half, maybe two minutes of material. That was actually like good. And I could say, so there's two. I just need 58 more minutes. Yeah. You know, now just build a whole hour of it. But that's what I did. I started building and building off of that by just adding these to it. And I got more and I had built up a lot more of stage confidence. Oh, you see, so you see, B is like, my mom tried to teach me how to ride a bike when I was five years old. Single mom, ADD kid, that ain't going to work. Just didn't work. Just, it was oil and water. I didn't learn, but then my friend had a scooter and I used to ride around on the scooter and I unintentionally learned balance from the scooter. So one day we're at the park and I just pick my friends bike up and start riding it. And I was like, Oh, and that's what you do is stand up. You just went and learned how to get balance on stage through UCB. And then you're like, Oh, I can go up. And that's the thing I always say about people when they're like, where should I move to do stand up? The one thing that I was told that was true was New York City just provides so much stage time. And that I think is the most valuable thing for anybody or comedy. A hundred percent. Because you're going to find your voice through that. I couldn't agree more. And I still think that to this day. I think exactly what you just said. And I believe it is true. And that's because I live in LA now. Yeah. And and I know the difference. Yeah, I mean, my friends, I've had friends move to LA and go like, Nate Bargatsy, when he left here in moved LA, he goes, I'm going to do the same amount of sets. And I was like, not even close man. And then he's stubborn. And like three months later, he goes, I can't. It's, it's crazy. It's like everything so far away from it. It's so far. It's, it's 30 minutes to get from gig to gig. And then, you know, the, the roster is usually pretty thick. But but the benefit of that is you live in LA where you have space to yourself. Yes. You don't have a person shoved up your ass and sitting on your head. Yeah. Everywhere you go. Yeah. That is, there is drawbacks. But the one of the benefits is, is because everyone's so tight, you can just fuck. I always said, if I ever built a new set. Sure. I was going to come back here. Yeah. And just get a Airbnb or a sublet. Yeah. And just stay for three months. And just cook with gas every night. Open mics. Just hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. And right, right, right, work, work, work. And I really think in maybe even less, but three months, if I just worked every night in New York, especially I could get myself a 30 to 40 minute set. Yeah. In that timeframe that I would be proud of. I'm not going to give up names, but I know a couple comics that live other places that are planning on doing that soon. Because they just go the amount of stage time and the variant, the varying feeling of audiences. It's not all the same audience. It's like different audiences. And that's another thing too. The older I get, the more I realize, my references mean nothing to these people. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's when you know your old. It cuts like a knife where you go with phone book. Yeah. Nothing. Nothing is on a phone book. Yellow pages. Ah, fuck. Dude, Rob, it was, I was so glad you were able to come by and hang out. Thanks for having me. This is awesome. And I love watching you. I'm a fan of you. So thanks for having me. Grit spit. Never quit. A marine's guide. Life in comedy. Out now. Go buy it. Make this man New York Times best seller. How fucking cool. That be. Happy Veterans Day. This is Veterans Day on the days. Thank you for your service. Thank you. You know, as I said, it's cool. I always think people that serve. Those aren't the guys ever to get mad at. You can't get mad at the guys that serve. It's the people that give them the shitty orders you can get mad at. I agree. But man, I thank you for your service. Thanks for being hilarious. Thank you. Right back. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, you know, I'm a big fan. So this was awesome. Thanks so much, dude. I appreciate it.