Barnaby Joyce Unfiltered: Immigration, Mistakes & the Breaking Point for Australia

I have this curious beast that lives inside my head and I'm about to unleash it. Alright, let's go. At home with Barnaby Joyce, yeah, it's so fresh, my man. Had on all of it off. I think you should put it on just to show you the punters. Now folks, any bigger than that, you'd come out of your bucking. Well, Bob Catericants, I've got a big hat but not a lot of a cattle. I don't think Bob's got any cattle at all. So I'll do it all right. You're getting on with Bobby or I don't know. I'll get on with him, but I don't know where these are bona fide cowl pitches. We're a cattle, right? But I would like to. You know, I've listened to Bob's stories. Yeah. After they're all true, he's 253. He's got a residence though, he works at. Yeah. He's kind of crazy. He's a bit like Sergio and like that. Yeah, look, I like Bob but you know, Bob's got a big story. I think that it would be smart for him to start thinking about, you know, what's next. I worry about him. He's a good guy. He's got a good soul. But I think that comes at home where you've got a thing about. Don't turn into a Joe Biden. You're going to tell that to his face because he's got a raft of heavy machinery. You're not going to worry. Yeah, I just did, didn't I? Bob Kat is going to come looking for this guy. Hey, look at what's it like being home because I can't imagine a place that's more removed than camera to hear. I love being home. I feel like there's two people. There's the Barnaby. So, sounds weird talking about yourself and the third person. So, give me some leverage for this. There's Barnaby on television. There's Barnaby at Danglemire. Barnaby at Danglemire doesn't even know who Barnaby on television is. Two different people, two different lives. Obviously, I'm closer to my natural person when I'm at home. Oddly enough, I'd prefer to be by myself, working by myself. Other people when they work with me get a bit annoyed by that. I just like to go out and do my own stuff out in the scrub, go fencing or do a bit of cattle work or something like that. But then you've got to be. You've got to be, you know, Barney and Lights on Dan and Canberra. And if you're not, Barney and Lights, you're not going to have a job in politics. And that's a different person and he has to do a different job. You're talking about it in a third person, but like you actually have to work at separating them. Yeah, you do. What's the difference between Barnaby at home and Barnaby at work? Well, one has to be in the public gaze and has to understand that a product of, you know, that the public demands to see and wants to hear. You've got to talk all the time. You've got to explain your position. But I don't be at home, it has to work out how to get still post to line up for a fence and to make sure that a pack doesn't run out of water and to keep the cattle coming in. So my brother who does the books has the money turning over to run the property. So we have a family operation. I run the property side and my brother runs financial side. You're talking as if it's a character that Barnaby and Canberra. It's a false, no, it's not false. It's just a different chapter of yourself. I suppose I bet it's the same with you and people watching this. Do you talk the same to your mum and dad that you do to your mates? Probably a bit more respectful to mum than my mates. I say I do a case. I mean, not to different people. It's just that you've got your roles to play when you're in that position. A heightened version of yourself, the cameras and whatnot. Yeah, maybe that's it. Gee, it's running hot at the moment through you and one nation. Yeah. I know that you love this area of Australia. Yep, I do. And I know that you love the nationals. Yeah. Yeah. And it looked like you separated without too much regret. How angst-ridden was the decision? It's like living a marriage. You don't do it flippantly. Think about for a long while and you try to sort it out. But when it comes apparently, you can't sort it out. And my relationship with David was completely dysfunctional. It was unbecoming of me. It was discordant. I was just become bitter and angry. And there seemed no way out. And obviously I was isolated. And he's stuck in a corner. No questions. Corner of the parliament. We don't want you to add to the electorate because we don't think people like you blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then you just get to a point and go, I'm out. That's it. I'm gone. And when I was gone, to be honest, the grace relief I've ever felt my life. I just walked and I was driving up the road. I know exactly where I was. I was between Yerala and Armadal. Just going on the great dividing range. And all of a sudden this feeling came over me like, why didn't I do that a year ago? I think, oh, that's over. Devoursing the national party or just David Little Pratt? Well, probably more David, to be honest. Do you think Frank? You don't like him, do you? We've got issues. So, you know, I've got to go over. But now I'd have to worry about that. I moved on. You move on. You move on. You move on. And that's life. I think that people would say, oh, yeah, I love the membership of the branches. I hadn't been with the national party for 10 years. I'd been with them for 30. Yeah. 10 years is just a party member. And 20 years is an elected representative. So of course, you know, you don't walk out and go, oh, you know, to hell with all of them, go, this hurts. I've got to, you know, for me to do the best thing for my nation, for myself, I've got to get out. That's what I was going to ask you because to me, you're through and through national. You're the very essence of the national party. And a lot of people out there voted for you because of that. And you're a voice for those national party people. And I wonder if it would be hard for them. Whether they feel that down on the inside. The, I have been overwhelmed, genuinely overwhelmed by the response I've got on the street, subterm, with and around. I was ready to take a fair bit of curry. And all I've got is people slapping on the backs and good on your well done. You know, you'll go well with Pauline. Now has there been any pushback, yes, predominantly by people who are elected members of the national party or a national party executive members. And I understand that. And I'll give them the latitude and I understand that completely. I don't hold any sort of bitterness or discrimination to them. But on another stable media stable, they came up and they said, we want to go for a walk down the street with you. Can you organise people to meet you and say hello? I went, I don't think they'll be a problem. I had kids you're not. We didn't get 150 meters down the street. And that film crew said, "We were to go. I said, well, this is crazy. We're just not getting anywhere." We got back to the office. And I said, it's like going for a walk with a friggin' Pope. So what is that? >> There would only be choices comparing himself to the Pope now. >> All the more unholy. >> No, that was, there. But what that shows, what was the point of what I just said, then? No, the support. For joining one nation is phenomenal. >> Yeah. And look, you are a popular, you're a popular man in Canberra. Where do you think Canberra's gone wrong? Because it's lost its authenticity. >> Yes, it has. It's come sanitised. I know. Maybe the advent of the mobile phone. But let's go for a little walk down memory lane. The politicians now, they have the swagger of, you know, I'm one of those blocs. I'm, you know, knock a bit. But they're, they're actually their formguide is a pretty sanitised, they grew up in a petri dish of either the union movements, lisses, firms or politics itself. And there, there's a lot of bullshit, a lot of pretending to be somebody or not. For instance, in the past, the Labor Party had this unique thing, Laborers, people who had actually labored with their hands, who had actually had skin cancers on their face, who could tell you about when they're a fetler or when they're a sheerah or when they're, you know, fitter and turner. Those just don't exist. They're not there anymore. For the National Party, I think in New South Wales, are at a federal level of the last genuine farmer, who actually had a farm. And even the Liberal Party used to be all small businesses, small shops, no, it's not mainly solicitors and professionals. And so the whole complexion has changed. And in the past, you had, you know, we're going back to the 70s, you had people who were ex-service men overwhelmingly, who'd actually served and actually that robustness of, you know, let's not get too carried away with this because, you know, that we've been in, we've been in worst dogfights in this one. And that's sort of been removed. When I, before I was going to camera here, he's just, these two, you know, you know, this is terrible. You looked at someone the wrong way. Oh, I think there was something suggested about how you smile at that person. Oh, that bullshit. When I was first, he used to be a patient with a holy grail, right? It was a pub. This was something to see because you would go in there and find politicians sucking face with other politicians and staffers and, and not sort of drunk smashed. And if you sat back and then and said, well, they're good politicians, yeah. Yes, they were with their patriots absolutely 100% where they bad. I don't think so. But that does now since the advent of the mobile phone expectations, those days are over. And, you know, I even remember reading stories about Gordon, you know, promise. Australia, former fighter pilot that crashed twice. And he went to dinner with his mates, had a few scotches after work, rolled up the dinner, got him a couple of bowls of red, finished dinner, got the cocktails, still feel like going, yep 100% getting out the port. And they said they poured him onto the plane, like he could, well he wanted to plane. Now he was a fighter pilot and he said he disgraced himself that he threw up. And he knew he was in trouble. And he looked around at the air hostess and he said, I suppose you find it surprising that a person with my flying experience would still get air sick and you went, not also, not at all, just that we haven't taken off. Now that was the prime minister in the past. It believed you me, it was vastly more robust than it is now. So what's happened in camera in the last couple of months because no matter what way you look at it, one nation's catching on wildfire. It is because people are just even sort of see ways on the back of that. People feel they've been sanitised by the left, they've been made to believe, they've been, not that they believe, they've been guilt-tripped into things that they'd never wanted to do. They've had a whole heap of sort of economic theorem that they knew was crap, rammed down their throat and I'll give you that. We're going to run the plates on interminute pair, solar panels and windmills and well, it's bullshit, it doesn't work. And they say, I can't say that because otherwise you're a climate denier. I can't become a climate denier, whatever you may, but people have got to that snapping point. And then this idea, they can just bring in heaps of people from all around the world and it doesn't matter and they'll go on jolly well and everything will be come by till we end up with a turkey shoot on human beings at Von Die where people just getting whole-slightly murdered and massacred. That's how well it works out. And a lot of people sort of said, okay, I'm an Australian, I'm tolerant, but I have a snapping point. I have a point where I go, yeah, no, that'll do me. And guess what? A lot of people got to, no, don't do me. I'm over it. Let's go. It profoundly affected everyone. I did. Most people across Australia, but how could that be in this country of ours, right? Even here, right? So Vicki comes to the, I get home, we just live in a cottage. We don't even be close to ours. It's the full bedroom cottage with iron roof. Vicki's at the front at the front fence crying and I'm going, what's going on? As she just said, they're shooting people. They're shooting people. And I was going, I said, it's their bond, I bet you're just shooting people. And that was Australia. People just woke up and said, what the hell is just happened to our country? What the hell just happened there? And that's what I think a lot of people said, okay, I'm going to toughen up. I'm going to toughen up because Australians, we're very good. We're very egalitarian. We're easygoing. Just leave me alone. I'll leave you alone. But if you keep poking them in the eye, poking them in the eye, they'll do get to a point and say, okay, I'm going to pull you on. Let's go. What happens now with that energy because polls are one thing, but if you can harness it, it's a huge job ahead. It's unrealistic that you'll make it on your own. You'll have to form some sort of coalition with David Little Proud, who you despise. And despise. It was just down like it. Are you going to, are you going to, is it when you look at the polls, you may take labor in the next couple of weeks? I mean, in your wildest imagination, did you think that would be possible? No, I didn't. And look, and Carl, if it goes down a bit, I won't be surprised either. But the trajectory I'm very happy with is an indicator. It's not the vote. Don't get carried away. Stay humble because hubris comes before nemesis. You carried away with yourself. You're going to get slotted over you. So, you know, I'm just, I'm very aware of the expectations of the Australian people, the work that's required, the skill sets that are going to start looking for now. And I try within the team with, you know, with Tyron, with Sean, with Robert, with Pauline, Malcolm, Malcolm Roberts. Do you get a same Malcolm Turnbull? That would have been a turnup. Don't you, Malcolm, it's going to get on with him. Another one of your favourites? You know, we were made to the start. He just, he just went all weird, you know? It's, it's like, oh, what happened to him? It's just like, you know, like, it's like one of these guys at the pub being after five or six drinks, they just turned to a crazy person. And you go, where were you? Where was that? And remember that was Malcolm. Anyway, he's gone, I'm still there. I win. Hard to argue with that. Yeah, 150 seats you want to put candidates into. Is that realistic? Ah, yep, you do it. And I think it's really important. It's really important that we give everybody the opportunity to vote for one nation. Our membership's going through the roof, absolutely taking off. And those members in those areas want to candidate. So you let them find a candidate and run them. Obviously, your betting process has got to catch up to, to the growth of the party, because inevitably one candidate or someone you, it happens in all parties, you'll find out they robbed a bank or, you know, then I can't wait to see the one nation learnings made at the polls. I mean, come on, I helped. I helped up the line. You know, what's wrong with that? Old school. Had more than endearing affection for their neighbours goat or something. One goat, far too big. Just one goat. But a man. But, you know, you're just like in all parties, you find out too late about the crazy person. And inevitably you'll have one of those. I think for sure, Labor thought you want to threat. And I think their tone has changed in the last couple of weeks. The tone has changed now. Are you going after them in? No, no, no, we're a conservative party. We're not. We're a conservative party. We're happy to replace other people who aren't, who aren't able to do that job. And we're going to go after the socialists. We do not believe the essence of conservatism is not rich people, it's not. It is people who believe that you, although you were not born of great wealth or a great education or blessed with a great family that nonetheless, you can transcend through the economic and social stratification of life to your highest level, limited only by your innate abilities. That means you have to have private ownership. That means you've got to have a bill out of going business. Because remember, people who get through, they usually get through as business people, their own little businesses. That means that you don't want government. And every time there's a new regulation, it's a removal of part of your freedoms. We don't like government in every corner of our life. We want government to worry about defending the nation, pick up the rubbish, grade the roads. But don't start telling me what power I'm going to use. And what I can say in sticking myriads of flags up in front of me and saying I have to salute the lot. And you know, and do all these other things with just says intrusion, intrusion, intrusion by the government. We don't want the government in our life. We do want them to build things though. But they're not very good at it. Are they? I mean, when was the last damn that any, I was the minister when we built the last damn. I think it was Charleston's dam up in Georgetown, North Queensland, and they're out of here. They don't like dams. They love the environment department. When you got this BS where you got to build dam, you get this massive cost and you find out most of it is environmental offsets. So that they do a study to Ningle and Blue Reef to allow them to build a dam at Tamworth. And we believe this shit. And we've just got to peel this garbage back. So would you invest in, I mean, we produce a shit ton of coal. We should have coal fire power stations. In every state. Coal fire power stations. I mean, there's nothing why. I mean, you want me to want my nation grows. So we've got coal that starts at Wollongong and goes to Makai all along there. We used up the cheapest power. Everybody, people, pensioners, we're comfortable because we had cheap power. And then they decided they were going to replace the coal fire power stations with windmills and solar panels all up and down the coast and transmission lights. And it was going to work perfectly. It was going to, and hasn't it worked well? And you're going to have coal fire power stations people saw. The climate, oh shit, you're not going to change the climate. Chris Barn is not God. He cannot change the great vault of heaven. That is going to stay around about where it is. And I've had a good look at Chris. I don't think the man could change the tire. We're on the way back. I read this thing the other day. It was quite interesting that we export so much coal to China. They're building coal fire power stations. Every full bed, every full bed. And part of the power they're producing is producing some of the windmills that we're wearing. They were in for. I mean, it's not. Something needs to give. It's not. But it's going to take some big decision. And then they see Australian people just to say, okay, and then we think they can come and say all intermenence of the cheapest. What really is your experience, cheapness? I tell you, you can guess our power policy really, really well. Forget about CSRO. They're basically, I've really lost faith in the more emo. I think we'll CSRO Rio Tinto. They're pretty smart. Multiple billions of dollars. They've had a damn good look at our power policy. And they got this little thing called Tommy Guy Smelter and Holy Fug of other things. And they've decided they're leaving. They're going somewhere else. Because we are off our heads and they're going look anyway. They look good old good old Aussies Don't tell them they're crazy right don't tell me crazy crazy people hate you telling them they're crazy And they're just going so that's one thing how many Migrants should we be taking in every year see they do it the wrong way around Carl They should see saying how many houses have you got free at the moment? How many hospitals are working well? How many schools are not crowded? What sort of people do you need do you need unemployed people having babies or do you need builders and Then you say well we can absorb this many people So that's what we'll go looking for but not just anybody We're going to look for the skill sets of people that we need and we're going to say Here's the contract you want to live in Australia? You can't there's two things you cannot be in the crime pages or on social security, okay? So if you want to be in the crime page, you're on social security you cannot come and I don't care if you're coming from the Vatican Central America central Africa or the middle of Europe if you're going to turn up and yak I on cause problems Then you stay where you are if you pine for where you came from and say I really want Australia to be just like the shit I like came from you go back there It was true Well I mean it's a fair statement, but I want to know from you You're in power tomorrow save you're the PM by the way, incidentally Who's PM you're Pauline? Uh Pauline there you go just let's see people are trying to buy us out by you know, no, someone's got to take the job Paul need to be PM. I could be PM anybody anybody That's a great thing about Australia you're not determined by a dot on your forehead or what your name was or whether you have a hyphenated double barrel name Um in Australia you just are here you are and You get ahead and you can be the prime minister if you want to be in Australia. I love that. That's for example hyperthetical Barnaby Joyce's the prime minister What do you do with immigration from day one? Um straightaway start doing a stock take on what Australia can absorb Because I think you'll find that we can't absorb what we got. I mean it's with this This is in that case we're bringing more than the population of Canberra. Yeah You say have you built the houses of Canberra? You built the schools. They're building you down Have you built you know what where where's your power plants? You can take her around with the budget All you want but it's not going to build homes. No and see your budget. What you're going to do with the budget This is nothing see if you've been in business you realize this Running nation is like running a business. Yeah, you balance. She assets and your liabilities No, over here you pay an L your profit You're probably your profit your revenues and expenses you're So now What the library does it spends all the time talking about the revenue and expenses mainly the expenses So there's been more money on chalk here more money on this more money on that You know, I have a new subsidy over here a lot more expenses And you say okay cyclone. That's great. How are you paying for it? Oh well Windmills sold balance and they don't talk about bolstering up the balance sheet You need substantial assets on the balance sheet. You need your dams you need your freight rail You need your roads you need your schools you need markets developed overseas You need coffee power stations. You need big assets on your balance sheet and then you can make then that inspires Mr. Mrs. Smith Uh, a Mr. Mrs. DeFanovic To run businesses and make money and pay taxes and then they pay taxes and those taxes help you pay for your expenses Um, you get your revenues which you're in income tax to pay for the expenses And see when you have a government that just tells you about how much more money they're going to spend Then you naturally have to ask will how you're going to make it And if they say well, I'm just going to make it by more taxes on what's already there You go well, that just means I'm poorer. That's all that happens. I'm becoming poorer And we're not having that proper narrative Carl In how we explain economics to the Australian people Um, I think the Australian people will go for will run with you If you say look we're going to start building up our asset base because we're no hope of making Meet me these expenses. So what's happening in the short term is we're borrowing money We're borrowing big chunks of money from the Middle East and from London and from Australia and from all around the world Which you have to pay back. Have you always wanted to be PM? Are you grew up on the land? Yeah, the people family people in the land are very involved with politics because Every time you change a regulation inevitably it changes for us new environmental laws. Guess what they say well We've got to stop the farmers from you know catching fish. It's obviously you know just lately You know I'll have to do things on your own land without permission from the government And then you can't get things to market because of regulations by the government and then things people go and strike because of actions You know inability to operate in the government and you're trying to make sure your family Maintains with ownership of the farm. See farms are basically handed and met most of them from family member to family member and down generations But the taxation department comes in and says we're going to do that's a a sale and you said well hang on it's not I'm just handing the thing down on my son or my daughter and um, you know that that's there to There the things that so people in the land talk a lot about politics You know what I love about coming out to the country That Apart from the hat yeah There's just no bullshit. Yeah, well that what I think you'll find is every even in this conversation everybody thinks it in the city But they don't say it But I get a kind of a thrill and a happiness that someone just did Yeah, I'm happy to talk like this with you all the time you know, I talk like this You know, so there's no bullshit about me the way I'm talking to you. Yeah What is it about the land that you know from an early age and and Because you have to at some point along the way they want you to comply They want you to be a certain thing they want barnaby to be the politician They want him to be the cookie cutter and you never changed no because I suppose it starts with you building your hammer with a Building your hands with a hammer and swearing and I just the real it's a real life um It's physical work, you know, it's actual physical work Which gives you a sense of realism? It's um, it's there's consequences to actions Um, even it's not so much when I was young is the right horse a lot but not so much now but certainly work with cattle You can be as big a talker as you want But that horse weighs 450 kilograms and new way 80 And that beast weighs for four four five hundred kilograms and new way hundred And you can talk a big game but it'll win You know and so it gives you a sense of realism and how something something breaks down in the country You got to fix it. You can't just go mum Help you go actually got to fix it, you know And so so it's a real it's a realism in your life Which is conveyed as a realism and how you express yourself And may mostly some people say we'll find things you say offensive because they're a brubbiness But you say I've just got to cut through things quickly to get to where I need to be with you I haven't got all day to to massage your ego Because your some psych case is going to run off and say that you had a troubled childhood, you know I just want to this is get to where we need to get to You ever been in a fight in camera? I Probably I think so. Yes You have been in a fight. Oh yeah probably some Maybe I'm pretty sure I think we know that paid for I think I played for yeah I have yeah okay Because I read that you're a bouncer. Oh yeah, well I'm not proud of that but I was Being a bouncer. Oh He good at I was cunning enough to be able to do it for two years. Oh, he look his trick The best thing you can use in a time of in a time of peril is your mouth not because You know don't you just Remember you're dealing with people who are drunk and have massive egos and just work with them work with them Work, you know, let them calm down and yeah don't Don't if you try to be a hero you are definitely gonna meet someone who's gonna beat you and they're gonna beat you badly How'd your mouth going? Oh, yeah, I lost the front teeth I'll remove I can even know the person I know that I'm the person who removed them which goes to show you can meet someone bigger and uglier than you and they do it very quickly The wonderful thing I think about you is and also um, I guess it's the most controversial thing about you is that you are Barnaby Joyce You're authentically Barnaby and you do things sometimes then yeah get me in trouble. Yep. So is Barnaby Joyce Barnaby Joyce's own worst enemy? I just Well the first thing I'd like to say is Thank you to the people who have so forgiving for me. I mean yeah look I don't know I mean okay the plan unboxing that for a lot of people that would have been ended career But my vote went up, you know, it's just I think people forgiving or you don't make a habit of it But I think people if they believe that you're real and You are you are and they I suppose sometimes they say yes kind of power for the course for him. I suppose that you know You remember I rang you you will I thought was the best dress vagabond and camera. I remember looking for it I said that's remarkable. I got my suit on the top top top top my top buttons done up. I've got a tie on And I'm talking on my phone. I mean it's just how you do business Not the you take not the you take advice from me, but I texted you and said make damage to you nil because it is it's you But you've had some regrets. I always want to do it again I can't believe you made that was a cluster of monumental proportion. But I mean, the funny story is my poor old chief of staff. He rang up and he goes, "Oh, bottom is spin, this terrible slanderous story about you, slanderous." Oh, God, man, so good. What is it? He goes, "Oh, it's just disgusting." He said, "They say they have this, someone has this film of you. Absolutely paralytic. They can't move, lying on a footpath on Londstale Street in Canberra, talking on your most wearing on your mobile phone." He said, "I've told them we're going to sue them. And for me, you're just crickets, dead silence." And he goes, "Now there's no chance this is true." He said, "I went, I'd maybe. " I noticed you go to a soft time when something's true. I've always wanted to know, did you get in much trouble when you got home that night? Oh, yeah, of course. Oh, yeah. I mean, of course you get in trouble. You know, you deserve to get into trouble. It was just stupidity. I wasn't up work. It was a little clock in mind. I was out completely. Yeah. Gold. Well, as someone who never does that. Yeah, never done that. And we've all never done that, have we? No, no. No, no. You know what, I found funny. All the journeys get all super serious and blah, how do you feel about this? Are you going to resign? Yeah. I was like, "Well, mate, there's nothing to bed with. I've done what." I was talking to one and she was saying, "It's funny how we're all getting up you about this, because on the weekend I was at a hands-knight. And I was doing summer solts into the archibald fountain." Well, generally, I just don't like to hold themselves to a count. I mean, other people for sure. I've been on the receiving end of all that. Yeah. You had seen that? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Holier than now. But the point is, it was you. You said, "Sorry, you're all on." Yep. And the public seemed to be okay with it. Yeah. Well, I suppose that they look for you next game. You know, you're going to, are you back in the saddle? Are you working hard for them? Are you, you know, you shot me and so on? Are you going to do that again? Mm-hmm. You know? And I think that's what they're judging. Okay. They don't give you a medal for it. They go, "Oh, yeah. They just, you know, Australians are good like that. They go, "Okay." That was a class one cluster. But I'm really un-worry about what you're going to do next, you know? And, you know, you get back work hard, be looking after me, focus on me, focus on my kids, focus on my husband and my wife. And, you know, we'll be right. We'll move on. Barnaby divorce is hard in the public eye. Yep. You said that heart was at a hard slog for me. Yep. At first, time your life. Don't do it. Here's my tip. If you don't need to do it, don't do it. Mm-hmm. Takes a huge toll, isn't it? It's, yeah, don't do it. Just, you know, it happened. And that's one of the things I don't make excuses. All my fault. 100% my fault, that. But it's not assisted by being away from home all the time, which is what happens in politics or always on the road. And, you know, you probably, five, six years works, eight years starts getting a bit scratchy. 10, 13 years, all starts coming on and stuff. And, you know, but anyway, there you go. Everyone makes mistakes, but you then, but once more, it happens, fix it up, move on, you get on and you, you know, you make the next chapter work. How is that next chapter work? Yes, it's going well. How's Vicki? Yeah, look, she's very, very patient, isn't she? I mean, I couldn't live with her. No. No, and there's time she can't either. But, no, it's great. And we got the boys and they're going well. And tell me about being a dad at 58. Ah, two months. Well, you know how? Well, you know how you watch a game of football and you get frustrated and you go, you know, if that I might be bloody hopeless, I can do better than that. It's like, it's like watching my grandmother spar, you know? And then you put on a pair of football boots and you do this crazy thing you go out for you know, whatever they call, you know, veterans game or a, you know, pensioners game. And you find it really hurts. Yeah. You're not actually as fast as you thought. And you look, and well, that's like having kids later on. You think, I can do it and then you go, I think, right again, it does hurt. I mean, but surely, someone else who can look after that kid, you know, but once they get to the age like, you know, where they're riding motorbikes with you and stuff like that, which they are now. Oh, it's, it's beautiful. It's incredible. Like, you know, to go out, I love going out with my daughters, your daughters and sons of different daughters. You know, they're, you know, it's bush walking. Yeah. And then when you're in a relationship, it's, it's dinner, it's talk, it's, it's getting inside your head and unwiring it and wiring it back up again, which girls can do. Boys, it's like get on the motorbike. It's like, um, roll around the grass. It's like get in the canoe. It's, it's all that. No, you know, I do love that. I love them all the same, but it's, it's different. And I get a, an immense sense of joy like I did with the girls now doing boy things with the boys, you know, and I wouldn't hand it back for anything. I love it. Well, that's good to know because it's pretty hard to hand them back. But what are your, what are your hopes for, for you two boys? I mean, they had what? Six and eight. Yeah, that Australia is strong enough. I don't know. Serious note. I worry about Australia. I think we've got the world's changed. And we have an hour, total 10 and a half, breathing down in it called China. They're not mucking about either. Mr. Zeezing, Ping is bullshit artist because he says he's going to take Taiwan by 27, and he's going to be living in 2026 this year. Or he's fair income and telling the truth. I think the latter, I think he's fair income, I think he's going to do it. You're we're not prepared for it. Well, you people don't even think about the short term. Like, when this goes off, what's going to happen to your car exports? They're finished. I know we're export their finish. Gas, beef, cotton. Well, the things you hate it, you might have to worry about them anymore because we won't export them anymore because all your, your trade will finish. So your dollar will be worth nothing, nothing. You're seeing everything you have is imported. Inflation will go through the roof. The only way we'll try and keep a dollar up is to put interest rates through the roof. Australia will be absolutely turned upside down, more so than any other country around the world. And we're not ready for it. There's no discussion going on in Canberra about that. I mean, you have a look at the question time. It's a circus. It's not a question time. I don't, I haven't heard anybody talk about how they're going to manage this situation. I worry about my sons because I think maybe because my family all been in the services, both grandfather and father myself. I think that we could, I think we could be for a really terrifying time. I don't think we're ready for it. And those two boys are going to live in it. And that's why I get really serious about, you know, we got to get it, we got to get it together in Canberra because we are drifting, we are not prepared for this. And we don't even look like we're about to get prepared for it because there's just not the skill sets and there's not the personalities and there's not the philosophies of the, and there's not the substance in the people there to be able to prepare for this. There's not there. You know, the elbow could lead us to something like, no, you couldn't know about it. So, how bow, I don't know mate, I just, he's not convincing to, you know, he just, I just get a sense of, he's grown up in the political petri dish and that's what he is. It's all about politics, he's good at the politics, but I don't get a sense of toughness about him. I get a sense of, sort of, pretence. I don't get a sense of comfort like, you know, some people can hang around, you feel comfortable, go, it's all right because of one with them, I know at least we'll put in a bloody good fight. But here we go, I think you'll go to water on us. You know, he won by a country mile though, but I mean, I mean, the Australian people aren't dumbed. He's only like 34, 34, 35% of the vote. Bill Shorten, who always reminds me about this, got more of a vote than he did every time, every time. Any funny elbow stories? Um, uh, yeah, he's, um, he doesn't, well, I don't, I'm sort of getting on well at the moment, but I think I'm gonna say because I reckon there have been times when he doesn't like him much. I know he, he, he most certainly didn't like me. When under his skin, yeah, you can get under his skin. You can get under, you can get under his skin. Um, I, I mean, it's pure. I mean, it's kind of sound really pure. But the way I just get under his skin is I'd make comments about his, his hands. Sorry, his hands. He doesn't, his hands. What's wrong with his hands? They just lovely. And I almost got lovely hands. Yeah, well, he doesn't like you telling me to tell him about where they're small and they're just nice, nice hands. You're weirdo. You are a proper weirdo. The other one I wanted to talk to you about is, it's like, it's like cricket in the, like, you know, cricket. If you can put, yeah, and it's an adversarial chamber, it's another thing they want to sanitize. You know, it's not supposed to be sanitized. You're supposed to see you can work on the balls in your toes. It's supposed to see if you can take, you know, you can take a bit of curry. You can stand up. You can't stand up in the chamber. I mean, there's a whole heap of timber between you and the other guys. And never going to get to you. And even if they didn't, they couldn't do anything. Have a look at them. So the other be sits there hang on everyone Barnaby sits there across the chamber Sits there like this because I've seen you do that and you're going you've got lovely hands elbow Well, I don't actually say that I said something else, but I've soundtized it for you Because even I know there's a point I can't go beyond You clever bastard. Yes, I am. Yeah, so so but it's But you say he you and all of a sudden next thing They put your hands in their pocket you go, oh god you your mind and they're off their game And they're not sounding as good on the questions and that's part of it And you know people's oh your question time is a disgrace He say yeah, but why do you all watch it then? Do you know how many what the audience is for committee work zero? No one watches it you can still get it. Yeah, I was interested in it They they want to be disgraced, you know, I want to be disgusted by question time It's got to be tough. I just got to test people out. That's what's therefore I wanted to finish on something that I've always thought about too. It was a great period because Johnny Depp was staying at Nick doing is who's one of my best friends in the world his place on the gold He's a great fellow. Yeah, but he was up a wedding and I was talking for a while I was trying to work out who he was and I went I know His mixture is Australian legend. He's really nice guy too. He's the best Yeah, he's the best usually when people've been that high you've meet them and they sort of fool themselves He's really nice. He's rock solid and what he did overseas was unbelievable You know and do you always flew the Australian flag man? He loves this country. Yeah, no good guy. Good guy. I'm so He was staying Johnny Depp and Amber heard was staying at his place when they break into that Not that he's confirmed. I mean likes to skip that stuff private but maybe but you know the two little dogs guys are tosser Who Johnny? Yeah, not me. Johnny. No, not me. Johnny. Johnny Depp Yeah, maybe he's a tosser He is and everyone luckily is when he was you know If you see that video of him and his mistress, you know throwing flowery jutter and you know carrying on like turnips inside their kitchen I mean, this is the guy. Oh Johnny. I mean the guys How did it come across your desk that he'd brought? It was a pistol and boo boo I just passed the biggest buyer security act in Australia's history and no one gave a shit about it And I was talking to my media advisor said mate. I have managed to get this through the Senate It's 650 pages long. It's a work of art and I haven't even got boo about it I said what we got and he goes, oh, you know there's an earthquake here and there's somebody else And you know and then we have we're over here. We also have you know Mrs. Kaffurps has made go given an economic statement out and oh It's really quite a stout him because there might be a point two five percent deviation from the standard meat on the trim to inflation I got oh and oh There's some movie actors in there But Johnny Johnny got me him and he's put apparently he's brought his dogs in but anyway. I mean whoa whoa whoa stop Ray Ryan he did he brought his dog Bye, are you seized an opportunity and you sort him out? And he didn't even know about not even the media advisor so I went out and did my door stop and My media has come up. That was disgraceful What did you say I remember you said I was going to euthanise him Which is my dad was a bit a penitle bit a youth and all penitle the quiet and down the youth and all sent him into send him in the happiness Give him a blue dream And I'm even more about that is that it's a They're not going to get up. I remember there was that the earthquakes had just happened Yeah, I mean the poor and I went back and I said how's it going? How's it? How's that media still still going? There's no one cares about that then later on they said starting to take off a bit I'm like alright Yes, oh, they're not about half an hour goes on those it's going really well Yeah, and then I sort of disappeared and came back three hours later. This is stars and he's like this It's the biggest story and I went running Australian goes the world Little Barnaby Joyce, hey look what you create and then the Americans hate him. You know the talkback show Well, I remember that Johnny went on a late night show and said that Barnaby Joyce looks like an in-bred tomato I'm still here and he's gone. I win again. You know, you know I mean they know the dog Barnaby Joyce. I mean, I live rent-free in that man's head Oh, I'm getting a cramp talking to you So you'll be back for the fight then you don't want to be wasting your time in opposition. Oh No, that's not the opposition is It's a mess. Yeah, no, it's it's a sad. It's so I agree. It's a dysfunctional. It's just hopeless. You know, I Think there's a skill set there to do it. They just don't seem to be able to put it on the paddock. You know, it's just I don't know what's going on there And you know, it's just it's just chaotic. You know, you've got married. They got divorced. They got married Got divorced. You want to get married again. They don't know whether they're gonna get married again. They're probably gonna get married before the election Right dysfunctional. I feel like that Spanaby Joyce is mantra that I'm still here Yeah, well, I suppose I am Well, I'm only here because people vote for me. I only hear because other people kept me here. It's not by my own doing so That's what it's all about making sure that people um want you and They only want you if you're doing something for them and they believe that you should be there and that's I hope that's it I hope they believe that you know that I've got Australia at heart and I'm trying to do the best like possible Can for this country. That's what's all about. We haven't got it. There's no playing beat. We lose this and you can lose it You can lose it. She's all over There's no there. There's no other undiscovered Australia that we can all drift off to this is it lose it. She's gone Good to talk you about me. Absolutely. She'll be fine.