Baby Names & Homeschool Debate: Your most chaotic questions answered

I considered home school. No, I've never considered that. Because media in a neighbor gets he's like I was home school turns out wasn't the best thing because now I know just everything might my mom knows right. What's your death row meal? Are these supposed to be like you're the most gluttonous meal because if I'm taking this so literally I don't have to be able to. Don't guys be eaten. I'll be throwing up. I lay awake at night every night thinking about what my future baby name will be. Do you guys ever just dance in your house? Like slow dancing. No usually put on like no pump it up. You've got to pump it up. Welcome back to Always Here. We're your host Abby Howard and Abby Howard. It's good to see you again. Long time. Yeah, every day. Every day of my life. Literally like well see you at the later. See you later. See you tomorrow. It's a joy. It's a joy and a blessing. It's a blessing. We're here to share the hope and the heart with heart and humor. If we were awkward at this point it's just a little bit of a hard transition in our life. Like when we go from being mom like for me at least I'm like mom mode, mom mode, mom mode. Cameras. Yeah, literally. Wait thoughts that aren't about I don't know pee and poop. Like like getting here and I'm like running around. In my head is that sound. It's like. You know that. That's yeah. Yeah. I'm very bad at recreating sounds. But in my head the whole day is the chaos. Give us a minute. I'm like. Oh, adult brain. Yes. And for logistic reasons we also recorded yesterday. So we've. Yes. I'm not like wait. What was I going to talk about again today? I'll tell you prepare. I didn't prepare but that's why we do prepare. Usually a hope and a hard. I want to say that when Abigail walks into the gym today everyone was doing a wall sit and they're like clap for her. I just put my hands like. Oh, I was 10 minutes late. I was late as well. I got to put that out there but yeah. And I'm actually usually late. Yeah. I feel like as long as I get there before the workout starts I'm okay with missing the warm up. I'm okay with missing the instruction. That's part of the workout though. Yeah, but it's all right. Actually, that was actually the booking. It was. Yeah, it was a little too late for my liking today. Yeah, I was I pushed my I pushed my own limits. But I went to the early class today. So that's why. I know but it's hard for me to walk Lewis because you have to take them so early that I need the mornings to a good dog mom. Thanks. Well, I'm you know, turning over a new leaf. I love my dog again. Do you remember Gervin's birthday party when I got a three candle? No, I was like, why don't I keep pulling your Abigail today? I don't know. I like it. Abigail was like, is there anything I can do to help you? I was like, you know what? Actually, yeah, batteries and candles. If you get batteries for the Rex costume, candles for the cake, perfect. And I got to put it in the candles and the cake. And I'm like, it's a three. It's a three. Not a four. He turned four. He turned four. Yes. And then I went over to Abby and I was like, thank you so much for getting this three candle. You're welcome. Oh. I was like, you're so welcome. I was like, say that for CJ. Good thing I brought back up. I bought a bunch of stick candles. Yeah. No, it's great. The letter or the number was wrong. So I have the ma'am. Now I'm glad I got that off my chest. We're about to have two three-year-olds. Yeah. We'll use it. We'll keep it. It can share. It'll get used. It'll get used. You let me have it after you're done with it. Perfect. And that sounds good. Perfect. Candles, that's the thing they do upcharge a lot on birthday party things. Candles. Like that candle was probably what? I think it was three bucks. Yeah. I feel like for those things, it's kind of a hassle and maybe go out of your way. But like the dollar tree definitely has that. It's true. Or like birthday party bag or birthday cards, holiday cards. Those were like six dollars. Dude, I've spent a lot on cards recently. I don't ever buy a card. I've got the grocery store. They're like nine dollars. Trade your dress does actually have cheaper ones. That's a good place to get them if you're going to get them there. I just don't, I don't really don't put cards in the bag. And I text a person and say, hey, my gift is the one that doesn't have a card and it's in this bag. I don't like it cards for like you guys, my mom and Matt. I had a lot of holiday gifts. Like if it's like a baby shower, I don't usually do a card. No, yeah, no, never. I usually try. We've been doing that recently. I'm like parties where you don't wrap. No, it's freeing. It's freeing. Some people love to wrap gifts. And that's their talent. I'm like, look at those in a bag and I never have the bag that fits. Then it's just like sticking out. And I'm like, well, I'm not going to put the tissue in it. Just shuffle it in there in a random. I don't like it either. Yeah, I don't care. Do you have a hope in a hard? Yeah, I think probably my hard is I did feel like today was kind of, I felt very stressed this whole morning day. And it's the type of day where the all the little things that usually you can just throw off your shoulder like don't are not a big deal. Kind of stress you out. I don't know why. I don't. I think I am starting my period, which I'm not going to complain. I'm so grateful. I'm healthy. I did forget tampons. So I might have to free bleed if it happens on the podcast. This is a white chair. I'm pretty sure Abby's got some products here. I don't think any of you do. That's my issue. I know our babysitter, our dogs are left to tamp on. I saw there was one tampon in the bag. But using the disc. So I don't even have tampons. So I'm like, well, but I haven't started yet. So I just feel like it's going to feel that way when I got my first period back postpartum. I was like, I don't have any. I don't use a big pad. I know. Yes, that's why I put that diaper on for postpartum. Just kidding. I did not have any of those left over. He used all those up. So yeah, I just felt stressed. Like Caleb helped me and picked up my groceries from Sam's club and did a pickup order. But he went to the wrong location immediately stressed me out because I had to put in like what number he was at with spot. And then yeah, he wasn't there to get it. So then he had to go, you know, it was just like a holding and I'm like, pick up at Sam's. Yeah, they do. I really wish I did that at Costco. I think Costco would be too flooded. They would probably, I mean, they could make a system of it. But yeah, I suppose they don't. Yeah, I've never gone to them because Walmart is associated with Sam's is correct. But it's free. I just do it on the app. I don't think it's because they already have the systems in place for pickup and stuff like that. I don't know. Costco might not. The Costco app confuses me. I literally don't know how to use it. I'm not a very user friendly. When I go into Sam's, I just use the scan and go. I literally scan and pay and store. I don't have to go to the checkout line. And I just did. Oh, it's always a line. No, I never have to wait. No, it's a hack. Okay. Catch me swapping. My efforts. It's, yeah, it's, it's a nice system over there. So yeah, just like things like that, a lot of things and CJ, yeah, we were just having a hard day. So we made it. We got here. This kids will do that. Yeah, you know, they take an episode and they wake up better. So neither my kids are happy today. No problem. Hard for me. My back hurts really bad. Really? Like actually really bad. Kind of made me wonder if he's in a sunny side up position because don't people have more back pain? I don't know. Abby, you were doing hurdles and pike jumps yesterday. So I just kind of like maybe that. I don't know. Sometimes I'm like, maybe just exercise. I mean, you just stop that. But it's weird. That stuff does not hurt me. Well, maybe I'm just not thinking about it in those times. But driving in my car, I'm like, uncomfortable. How do I get my back? It hurts up high. Weird. Really weird. And um, sitting and watching a show, I'm standing. I'm standing. You guys. Oh, no, I'm watching Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders literally standing on my feet just hunched over. No, hands on your knees. You're like, yeah, or then I get down all fours. I was literally proud of my dad's yesterday. I was like, I'm just one second. Yeah, get on that ball. I don't have a ball. I got to get a ball. You got to get a ball. I would give you my mind. Way too big. Yeah. I said, I don't have a ball. Because you can kind of rotate and wiggle and move and get your position right. Yeah. I felt very bitter towards Caleb at the end of my pregnancy when I he would be like just sitting on like couch, relaxing, and I was on the floor doing exercises and bouncing on my ball. I'm like, I'm actually training right now. And you're chilling in his 10 o'clock. I'm aggravated. I don't know how I'm going to be towards like the home stretch like that. Because I feel like people say you're better off just resting because you're about to be so exhausted to like going to all that. How are you supposed to go in? Oh, well, you're doing ball exercises. Yeah, you're prepping for labor. What do you think me resting? Like laying on down? Yeah, like resting. No, laying down is just not comfortable at that point. What are you jealous of? Because I wanted to be chilling. And I just couldn't. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, you should get a pregnancy pillow. Maybe that's why your back hurts. You need to support your belly. Maybe it's like pulling on your back. That is is what I liked about my pregnancy pillow was it being behind me. Yeah. You can lean back on it a little bit more. That's the only time I actually feel kind of good though. But maybe you're right. Like it's lingering effects into the next day. Maybe. I don't know. I don't know. I'm not a doctor. I'm sorry. It's frustrating. Is frustrating actually. I'm sure hard. I was up from 2 to 3 30 a.m. this morning. For what? No reason. Oh, insomnia. Yeah. I was texting you back. I was texting Matt and he was responding to me. He's like, why are you? He's in a different time stuff. But I was like, why can't I sleep right now? My brain was dreaming, "Biz Well Beauty," and then I woke up, and it was thinking about "Biz Well Beauty." Same. And then I was just. You would have guessed it. I was like, "Maybe." Oh my gosh. Well, we are recording this before launch. So we're still before launch. Two days before Christmas. Two days before launch. Yeah. Is that your hope? What's your hope? Yeah. That's my hope. That's my hope. That's my hope. There's a finish line. In two days. Yeah. That's my hope. Yeah. That is hopeful. My hope was that my lashes. I thought looked really good. Are you wearing it? Are you wearing it? I will bring you up for three days. I love it. You guys. I love it. It's so good. And I'm not just saying that. And the coming off, it's tubing. Yeah. It is. I was scared to like promote that a ton, because I have never like actually like when I remove my makeup, I use an oil cleanser, so I'm not like, you know, I mean like using the water and then pulling to that. I didn't do that. Yeah. But it just comes off really easily. It comes off in little clumps. Yeah. When I wear other ones, it would just like, turn my whole face face black. Does that make sense? Yeah. And it wasn't like all coming off. I'd wake up in the morning. I'd be like under my eyes. Right. This one comes right off. Yeah. It's so nice. And I think also with the tubing quality, it lasts all day better. Yeah. I told you this a while ago too, and I was like, I'm going to try it out, because I don't take off my makeup. I was like, I wonder how it's going to last in the morning. And it was still on. It wasn't like. It didn't feel or anything like that. Yeah. It lasted me only. Great combo of lasting all day and also being easy to remove. I don't know. Do you guys ever wonder sometimes when something comes out and you're like, why did it take them so long to fix that problem? Yeah. Like, why did no one think we just made peace with them? We literally just made peace with the pain. I told the girls the other day I said, I have a business idea. Turns out it was a bad business idea. But I said, we should make a water bottle with two lids. One for the mom and one for the child so that we don't have to swap spit on straws. But I wasn't informed that the germs are just probably in the cup from backwash, right? But in my head, I was like, that's a problem that we're just putting up with. So maybe if someone has a way to filter germs, you can make a millions of germs seeing you in your child. Yeah. Giving you an idea. You're an inventor. There you go. Take it if you will. Take it or leave it. Yeah. We'll be interested to see how this all does. You know. We'll see. I was thinking about it because I went back to my email to when we had a call with some like businessmen and I was like, hey, I have this. Like obviously it's not like what do you call this like I like a genius out of the blue idea like people leave all we all wear mascara most of us. But I was like, I just feel like there's like something we're missing like I feel like there's a product that we could do it and I think it'd be I think we could do it really well and then like these men on this call are like, that's really dumb. It's never going to work. Are you serious? Yeah. I'm not going to name them. But they, um, they really, I'll never work. So, um, now I'm like, I'm interested to see three years later. I know. That's some motivation. I did it. Yeah. That's the motive. That'll drive you. Let me tell you. Oh, I'm excited to see. You want to take me off? Tell me I can't do it. I know you're like that. Like I was kind of just like, okay, I think you're wrong. Yeah. I don't know. We'll see. And when you give anything, I want a better mascara. So I got it. What do you think makes it better? Uh, I literally just because when I would wear a mascara before I always felt like I had to compromise on something. So like when I had found the mascara that I like loved, I still felt like I needed to wear a primer with it to get the volume and like the length I wanted. I like a little drama with my lashes. Like, I mean, I'll, I'll layer it on. And I always felt like I needed a primer to achieve that. This one is so buildable all on its own. But then also I feel like when I had found a formula, I was like, okay, with a primer and this one, I really liked the way my lashes ended up looking. It wouldn't stay that way. First of all, like they would get really heavy. So I'd curl my lashes in them by the end of the day, like everything was just kind of melting down, mixing with my under eye concealer and just like creating a mess by the end of the day. And they just didn't look as good. And so this one really lasts like all day. And I think it's really great, especially like we're living in a hot climate, and really they stay up. They stay up. Yeah. Yeah. So exciting. There's always something. Do you remember in 2016 when people would wear like four different mascaras? Like they would layer a lengthening and then a volumizing and then they'd do primers. You know, remember when people would do that? Oh, I probably did that. I know. You felt like you had too expensive to get what you wanted. So many tubes of mascaras. Seriously. And it really is just super long lasting. I've used the same tube for a while, and I wear it every single day. Yay! And last thing. Mascarra for me is like also the one thing my makeup bag that I could wear on its own, and I feel put together, and like, like I'm like, oh, I feel kind of feminine and ready for my day. Whereas I don't know if there's another singular makeup product that I could wear like in isolation. I'm like, okay, that really did something right there where I feel like it opens my eyes up so much, and yeah, it gives me my personality. But, yeah, I'm really excited. Yeah. What about guys wear mascaras? I know. I keep wanting to put it on my kids because they have amazing lashes. Literally the best lashes I've ever seen. Oh, these lashes are insane. That just, for several reasons, we're not going to do that, right? The temptation is insane. That would be so fun. I love it. Do we have any life updates? Well, we kind of do need to circle back because I did leave everyone on a little bit of a hanger saying about date and night, my thoughts on the drama. Do we care? Is that what the name of the movie is? Yes. Yeah, the name of the movie is called the drama. Okay. Because in our notes for this, it says thoughts on the drama. Yeah, but I've been playing like there's some family drama. I was like, wow, it's happening. It's the drama. Literally no drama. It's happening. Okay, perfect. But this movie, do we care? Yeah, I do. Okay. Okay, so the movie is the drama with Zindaya and Robert Pattinson. Why do I feel like people say Patterson? Anytime I hear Patterson, I just think that that's a raven episode where they're baby, remember this one? No. No. Okay. It was their Halloween. Never mind. It's okay. I probably see this. Yes. It was the babysitter at the Patterson. So I was really drawn to the movie because of, I like, loves Zindaya. Then also, why have I never said the way people ask like, dream, guess on a podcast? Like, of course it's gonna be Tom Holland and Zindaya. It's never gonna happen. Are they still dating? They're making it. They're making it. Oh my God. They're like the cutest couple ever, Abby. They're secretly married. They're so low-key. They're so low-key. They're so low-key. Okay, so I don't think it's weird that I don't know that. Yeah. Well, now people talk about that. They're going to be better right now. They're in a Spider-Man movie, too. In the Odyssey. That's cute. They do all these movies together. Well, they-- Not a lot. But they do Spider-Man movies. When they do it together, it's really sweet. That's really cute. They're really cool. I kind of actually enjoy it. I don't really get into behind-the-scenes of actors and stuff. And I'm like, I really like them. Yeah. I just think she has a great head on her shoulders. Abby, are you getting naked? [laughs] I sure was pulling. I took it away. You're scatterbrained. I'm so-- The movie, though. I will say, here's my thoughts in a nutshell. I never want to see it again. I didn't know how to think afterwards. I didn't know how to feel. You know, Matt and I didn't talk to each other. Because it's kind of twisted. It was so really weird. Yeah. So the concept of the movie starts off like a rom-com. And I was really loving that. And then all of a sudden, it just takes a turn. I'll give you the premise. So there's like a-- They're about to get married. And they-- Well, they meet. They date. It's really cute. They get engaged. And then they're like a week before their wedding. They're trying out wedding-- like wedding dinner menu items and wines. And they're with another couple that has already been-- they already got married like a couple years before. And they're like, we did this before our wedding. And it was really good for us. We just confess the worst thing we've ever done to each other. And they're like, let's play it right now. And so they go around the table. And it ends on Zendaya's character. And the things people are confessing are actually like kind of dark. They're not like funny, like, ha-ha. Like, they're like kind of dark. And then-- but then it gets to Zendaya's character. And it's really dark. And it kind of like uproots their relationship. Because like, she now feels really weird that people weren't like shaking it off. And then he's spiraling. Because he's like, who am I about to? Like Mary. Mary's been the rest of my life with. And then it just starts getting more and more twisted. And the movie's very artistic. I would say it's more like an indie film. I don't really know what that means, but it felt like that. Like, very artistic. It's-- you're doing a lot of like, implying. Like, I don't know. It's-- is it considered a psychological thriller? No. What's it considered? Maybe it is. Maybe. A psychological thriller. I couldn't put this movie in a box. I'm going to be so honest with you. I got no box for it. And maybe that's why. Maybe I'm just not cultural enough. Cultural? Art's seen up. Oh, OK. OK. You like things to fit in a box in your TV. Yeah, I was like, I kind of wanted to either laugh or feel lovey or cry. Or cry. Or cry or-- or be scared. Like, this one I literally did not know how to feel. Interesting. But I respect what they did so much. I was like, it was very well done. That kind of makes me want to watch it. And I don't like-- And maybe you should. Maybe you should. I mean, honestly, maybe you should. But I don't know. I can't really say that, you know? Never felt more confused than you. What did you watch it on Netflix? It's on Apple TV. But you do have to-- this is what I meant. You do have to pay for it. It's on these streaming services. But you do have to pay for it. Is it new? Oh, yeah. It's pretty new. What genre? Well, it's not giving me-- it's saying the core characteristics are character development, conflict and realism. Sub-ones are crime drama, historical drama, romantic drama, and dramedy. OK. So all of them. So great. I love when they marry a drama is under drama. It's drama. It's a drama. You know what? I love dramedies Like what drama comedies Like no, I know I'm an example Oh my god, like that was laugh Yeah, that made me feel really weird and someone on patreon too was like I don't like it was good But I never want to I never would recommend it to anybody like yeah, I feel that way Okay, it doesn't end in a pleasing way like it doesn't end in a bad way either it just ends Good goodness. I was scared Yeah, I think it is interesting to think about like we start dating Matt and Caleb in high school I didn't have to learn that much about his life beforehand Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, so that is like interesting. Yeah, I mean majority of people meet later in their life You know 20s 30s 40s and that's a lot of life you've lived before you start dating her That's true. I think about that a lot because that you see those TikToks. They're like I'm just realizing that I just like married and outspinning my entire life with someone that was once a stranger to me Yeah, I don't feel that as much because I was like your prefrontal cortex still had about 10 years ago. Yeah, I had a long time ago Actually, my dumb decisions together We did that for a while. Yeah, I actually our husbands were talking at Griffin's birthday party like my prefrontal cortex just finished They look like this is really reassuring. Yeah, we just have started a whole family and your brain was just You know, it was just figuring it out I'm scared. I think about my parents because they had us later like I think my mom is 35 when she had me And so I didn't really even know my parents like when I was older I remember them in their 40s the most and their 50s So I don't even know my parents the first 40 years with their life really Whereas CJ. He's gonna know me in my 30s. You know, I don't know. It's just an interesting. I have no idea But my parents just based off what they told me they were fun. Yeah, they were but also I think they're liars So I don't know who knows. I'm learning a lot more now that I'm older You also saw George Washington. Oh, yeah, cried. I Fourth of July, I was like oh, I didn't realize you were such a patriot. You were so fired up from this movie Well, you should know that I Was very fired up, but you had to be there guys. We were in the front row on the 4th of July Everyone was clapping. I thought I should stand up at one point. They started changing you No, okay, it was just a very it was just a very great moment in history Honestly, I learned a lot mad said maybe we because we're trying to decide what we were literally deciding between that movie and the obsession Which have you heard? Yeah, I want to watch it. Yeah, we were deciding between those two nothing alike No, and then I we were like last the 4th of July, but that goes but we know what's gonna happen. Yeah, I said don't be too sure I might be surprised by some plot points sure and I learned some things. Yeah, I mean this is before his presidency So I was learning some things for sure We I was humbled in some ways. How do they know these things about the George Washington? How did I know anything about history? I think people lied a lot. I Was like how do we trust them? They did lie in the movie. There was liars like in war. Yes. Yeah Anyway, I shed tears. I was crying. Yeah, that's the tears. And that was like are you crying? I was like it's beautiful Mm-hmm. I was just like man people really just sacrifice their life for our country that that really impacted me Okay, it got me in the on the 4th. No, it is. That's always I mean very well done movie. Mm-hmm. Very well done movie You're gonna have to learn some things though. I Would actually like to watch that. I think that's something killed when I both are currently both enjoy history or war movies It's not graphic. Yeah, and it's not like some more movies are like whoa. Yeah. No, it's not graphic I think it was very isn't it crazy? I think they used to fight like that just in lines and then they'd walk It's not insane today. I kind of felt bad for the horses, and I feel bad even saying that. Yeah, I mean it felt bad for everyone I feel bad for everyone. I was like it's so freaking miserable. Yeah, we're getting sick. It's cold very brave And I also kind of just forgot about the whole French people being here. They were here. Yeah, I mean they proud of our side. No, we were against them Oh, and then they gave us this touch of liberty. I guess if we're the British There's just three groups of people in this movie. There was the natives There was French people and then the British And they're here They everyone wanted a piece of this and there was a powerful moment at the end when George Washington comes out in blue Because that was the color of Virginia at this point because oh yeah, there's so many quotes wait I'm rambling way too much about this, but he was like hey, this is not my land is in and is across the ocean He's like this well this land is our land. Oh, and then he wanted to change uniforms And he to blue because they were wearing red before and that was kind of like what they wore like the British traditional Like that was like their soldiers uniforms and he's like I do have one change I want to make and they come out in blue which was the color of Virginia And so he's like basically like no longer fighting for this man overseas like the king He is like now. We are like establishing our own. He's like I'm here to serve you guys not some king over in the ocean Oh across the ocean, and so it was a powerful moment. Yeah, thank you to chili pad for sponsoring this portion of today's episode I will talk about chili pad until everyone's sick of me because it has seriously changed the game for our sleep And you spend a lot of your day asleep I mean, I just about majority of your life and getting good quality sleep is really important Especially as a parent if you are getting a chance to close your eyes like you want that to you want a dish Restful. Yeah, nothing is more annoying than when you're waking up in the night sweaty hot and uncomfortable That will cause the most wake-ups for me honestly, but that was pre-chilli pad days I think about my life and pre-chilli pad post-chilli pad. I think about my mattress pad pre-chilli pad yellow That is exactly why we want to tell you about the chili pad 2.0 by sleep me It is the most advanced version yet of the bed cooling system built specifically for people who are tired of waking up hot and sweaty The chili pad 2.0 actively cools or warms your bed using water It's basically a thermostat for your bed and water is the key here fans just move hot air around But the chili pad actually uses chilled water to cool the bed pulling heat away from your body and it works with your existing mattress So no new bed needed. Visit www.sleep.me slash always here to get up to $155 off your chili pad 2.0 with code always here. This special offer is available for the always here listeners and only for a limited time So order it today with free shipping and try it out for 30 days You can return it for free if you don't like it with their sleep trail visit www.slep.me slash always here and never wake up hot And tired again. These last episodes have revealed to me that I do not remember anything. Yeah High school. That's why I was like a little bit. Should we start like a little We should start a little homeschool for a higher tutor for the moms. Yeah, it's like we're gonna charge it I considered homeschooling no, I've never considered that I'm like actually wait a minute That's like I'm not at the calling the meeting a neighbor gets he's like I was homeschooled He's like he's it turns out wasn't the best thing because now I know Just everything my mom knows right And he's it turns out that's not enough I was just involved for himself. I could never homeschool. We would have to be like I'm dumb No, you're not I don't entertain him for me. I think it'd be a good opportunity for me to also learn. I honestly be like wow That's amazing Like running up Shock okay, well this episode we are letting you guys take the floor yeah They are we're doing a voicemail only episode I love these because it's just really cool to get to hear from you guys as always, but Especially for a whole episode. I know it's fun. Yeah, okay. We're gonna start with health and beauty Oh Hi Abby Abby and Adi my name is Abby and I'm from Alberta My question for you guys today is what type of mascara do you guys like to use in other little makeup products? I want to start using more for myself, but more natural So if you guys have any recommendations that'd be awesome love listening to you guys. Okay. Bye. I love that you asked that question No Yeah, I was saying today when I was like I've always hid my mascara off screen doing my makeup videos Yeah, because I've literally been wearing some form of this formula for a year and a half So it's cool like be able to bring it on screen. Oh, but I have been wearing Whatever like I we've we went through so many different tweaks and edits of the formula Yeah, but some version of it. I've worn it for like a year and a half That's point. Yeah, but and I will say you can make it really natural just do one quick coat and it'll look really Natural is so good. I built it up today. I did two coats. I wanted to come up on camera But I like that you can wear it more natural or you can make more dramatic. I love that. No, I'm wearing bizzball beauty Thank you. Is it a baby? products that are like more natural that like Mara and Ilya I think of as like really great ones even Well people is a more affordable version that has like clean ingredients. Oh cool. Yeah, there's sold on Amazon Bye bye. Also think the. are sold in Target. Nice. I also really like the verse. You can get a target. I love their under eye concealer. It's really hydrating and I have no idea if it's cleaner ingredients. I think it is, but they're available at Target and more affordable too. And I feel like it kind of has the same effect as Ilya where it's really natural looking looks like my skin but better. But I feel like it has good coverage from it under eyes and it's really hydrating. Yeah, verse. That was the other one of the other questions was favorite product for your under eyes. Oh, you just got it. Perfect. Hey, Abby and Abby. My name is Seanie. I am a local east alley A.V. girl as well. And I was just calling to ask how you guys walked into the gym for the first time and it may sound dumb, but it is the scariest thing. I've gone to burn but I just can't get myself to go inside just because of nerves and you always say people are looking at you. So I'm just curious on how you guys just feel able to just do it. Bring a friend with you. That will make it a lot easier, honestly. I think the first time I went I didn't have a friend going in and I probably felt more nervous doing that. But if you were like, hey, if you're really fun, if we try out this workout class together, it will make it so much easier just to have some of you already know going into that space. And chance star, they'll love it too and then they'll sign up and then you can always go with them. Yeah. But I guarantee, even after one class, at least with our gym, the community is so strong that feeling will go away quickly. We always have someone I can wave to or smile at or say hi to when I walk in the gym. Your confidence just grows the more you prove to yourself that you can do it. Totally. Well, I like that about burn that they don't actually like that they don't have mirrors because I feel like you're not focused on yourself or other people. You're just focused on the workout. I think that's something that I remind myself a lot because sometimes there were shorts that has been having lately, but bring these flowy shorts. And I get a little insecure sometimes because they ride up if I'm laying down and I'm like, oh my gosh, people can see right up my shorts. And I'll hold them into it. But then I'm like, I'm never, I can't even look at other people when I'm exercising because you're doing your exercise. Like you're not even able to watch others. So then it kind of melts to relax. I'm like, no one is actually looking at me when I'm doing this. So I think just reminding yourself that no one is looking at you. And maybe it feels that way and I think I went and I stood in the back my first time at the gym like back. And I was nervous going back after postpartum too, just like unsure how things were going to feel and I knew it was going to be hard. But after about a week, your body gets used to it, you start to feel better, you keep going, your confidence gets better. And it's just pushing through those initial nerves. But also you can modify anything and any gym you do. You can always modify it to make it as hard or not as hard as you want. And I think knowing that you have that freedom to do that is kind of to help your nerves. Yeah. Take it. If my mom can do it, you can do it. And she would say this too. I'm not just trying to put her down. She has zero gym confidence. Like because she, I don't know if she actually did a workout until she was almost 50. I don't know if she did. Yeah. And she showed up and she's pushing herself out. She even tried to pull up the other day. And that was really outside of her comfort zone. So I'm saying like, you just got to think about that. Yeah. I think it's about Laurie when you're feeling insecure. I was going to say that too with burn specifically, you give, they tell you to give someone a high five at least 10 times every single workout you're there. So you're meeting someone or at least interacting with someone. And I feel like that can make you feel like less alone or like because your other people just encourage you around you. I high five people. I don't know all the time. That's keep moving on and go through your workout. So I think that and the trainers will know your name. If it's your first time there, they'll ask you and they will probably say your name while you're working out. Like yeah, it will make you feel less on that. Going to a gym specifically that like not burn is a definitely more intimidating if you've never been. I would say if you've never been walk in, I want to treadmill just walk on a treadmill, look around. No one else is looking at you, but you look at them and see what they're doing. Learn from just walking on the treadmill, look at, oh, that's how that machine works. And start like familiarizing yourself with what that looks like. And then maybe have a plan of what you're going to, okay, next time I'm just going to go do bicep curls. So I'm a little closer to the cables. So I can see what kind of exercises those people are doing. You're looking at them to learn. You're not looking at them to judge. And that's probably exactly how other people are looking. Yeah, that's really good advice. Addie, you pulled TikTok. Yeah, how to do a cable machine. I've done that so many times. I'm like, I'm a very, very familiar work out ideas. I'm very familiar in a typical gym. And there are still machines or things that I'm like, how does that? I don't know how that works. Yeah. So it's so normal. The more you go, the more comfortable you get. Yeah. Hi, Abby's Maddie. I have nine weeks post-partum and I just want you to advise on going back to working out post-partum specifically with straightening your pelvic core. Every time that I try running, I peel a little. So I need help. Anyway, thank you. We're black leggings. Yeah, I'm black leggings. I didn't run, I couldn't run until, I feel like running didn't really feel good until it was at least six months post-partum. Like I would do it, but it didn't feel good or natural until a little bit farther out. So don't be discouraged by that because yeah, you're everything's still healing up and tightening up. And what time, I think it does get better. Well, my advice for getting back into exercise post-partum is to just get yourself a new workout outfit that fits your body right now. And why don't you really like feel good in and that will excite you. I even recommend getting new tennis shoes. Heck, that is a great. I feel like this was controversial, but like, I was like, Matt, for my push present, I really want like an aloe yoga set and new hokas. Yeah. He's like, well, you're gonna have to tell people that that's what you're gonna explain that one. And I was like, I know, I was like, that's just really what I want. And I felt like that like really like gave me because it is, it's a time where things are not going to feel right, look right, like, and so just having something new, like to make it exciting and motivate me. And yeah, I've never done like a pelvic floor program, probably should. I pee a lot. There are so many good free resources online. Like if you just go on YouTube and type in like pelvic floor, pregnant postpartum, pelvic floor exercises, you can do that. And I remember, maybe after CJA, I would go and just do some stuff. Like I'd walk, I'd do a couple of strength exercises. And then I would go and I would do a couple pelvic floor things on the floor. I think it's just easing in. You have to remember you still relax and in your joints and stuff. So everything feels just loose and stretched out like in your joints. I mean, I hurt my knee and my shoulder. So just do what I didn't do and take it easy. Take it slow. I sure was. I did do a, what's it called? What's it called when they're like a trainer, like they do physical therapy? Is that right? I had a private session with someone after having Griffin about like how to do movements that wasn't going to like hurt my core more. And I think that's a specifically because I also had a hernia and I knew I was going to have to really adjust to the mesh then after that. And a lot of it is literally like just remembering like trying to like so they say like zip up from like you're like we're a blotter up like zip up and like support all of that because all of it is like probably still detached. I feel like it takes a long time for that to like I feel like it's just healing for me. Yeah. And so yeah, I think about like zipping up and like take a breath before literally every move any movement because it all uses your core because easy to just like relax that and then just hurt that gap more hurt your back and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just trust yourself. I feel like you know what you know what feels weird and what feels it starts to feel weird. Don't do it. Wait a little bit longer. Mm hmm. Modify. Yeah. Okay. That's it for health and beauty. So we're going to go to kids and family. Yay. I went to the gym postpartum but I don't think I like consistently went and told us at least four months postpartum where I was like back in the routine like I would go but things didn't feel like good good and tall well after four months. Yeah. There's a lot of things I didn't do or I'm not tired or yeah. A lot of the core days. Mm hmm. Gosh. No core. Hi Abby. Abby and Abby. My last name is Stark and it is really important to have a really cool name that it goes really well with that. So, do you love all your new names? Any suggestions are welcome. Bye. That's so relaxing with Stark. Stark. Okay. Well, my first advice would be to look up the entire Stark family from the Game of Thrones and don't do those. Don't name your kids that. What are they? What are they? Are they? Are you? We've got Ned, Pete, Lynne, Toley, Rob, Sansa, Areya, Bran, Rick, Rickon? Rickon? That's a family. And Jon Snow, Kenny Jon. You just got to make sure it's none of those. Okay. Stark is a strong name. It is a strong name. That's a good last name. Well, it's hard. I don't know what your brand is, you know. I know. Does Stark also remind me of Iron Man? Is that? She said she likes unique, right? Mm hmm. She likes cool. Cool. Cool. Okay, I don't know about cool. Sterling Stark. She's like a different guy. I can't even do the double. I like literature. Smith Stark. No, I don't like that. Stark actually does put you in a difficult spot in a way. It's a great position to be in, but that is such a strong last name. It does put the pressure on. Yeah, it does. Okay, let's do one girl name and one boy name. It's got to have more than one syllable, right? - Yeah, 'cause like Sam, I like Sam Stark. That sounds kinda cool. - That's not cool. - Oh, sorry. - That sounds like a comic book. - That's a one syllable example, you know? - It feels like a comic book. - Okay. - Oh, I wasn't even thinking of girls. - I know, it just seems like a boy name, doesn't it? - Yeah. - I'm curious what her husband's name is. I really think it needs to be like three syllables 'cause anything about like Jocelyn Stark, like it kind of fits more, but Jocelyn isn't necessarily cool, but like what's a longer, because Stark feels like punctuation. It's got to have some kind of flow and then boom. - Okay. - Yes, I've got like three syllables names. - I can't think of a single name. - I mean, how serious I did you want us to take it is? (laughing) - She's gonna love this. - That is research. Can I look at the internet on this iPad? - Yes. - Okay, well, how about you guys do that on your service? - Isabella Stark is a great name. - It is. - Aurora Stark. - It's something like those aren't unique. - Okay, so I guess not unique. - They sound really good though. - Camille Stark is a good name. Lily Stark is a great name. - I do like that. - Yeah, I like that. - Sheridan, that's kind of a key name. - Anderson Stark for a boy maybe. - I like the name Anderson. - Our synopsis is three syllables. - I'm gonna sit on this one and I'm gonna really take this seriously. - Veronica Stark is good. - That's strong. - Yeah, that sounds like Veronica Stark. - That sounds like a book. Like a book name. - That sounds like what's it called? Riverdale. - I love that. - I love Veronica Stark. - She's a character, I love. - Do it. - Did you think of a boy when you liked Anderson? - Anderson Stark. - That's cool. - Love that. - It's so fun, but it's fun question. - Okay, so, do you guess who the godmother is? (laughing) - Hey Abby, Abby and Abby. I am calling because I have a Mexico trip in two weeks with a four year old and three year old. Usually they wake up at eight, but we'll be waking them up at four for our four and a half hour flight. Please give me any tips. I did watch your travel episode. I just wondered if you had anything specific for waking up super early. Thanks. - I actually think waking them up early is not going to be a good plan. - Yeah, I don't think it's going to be an issue. I'm flying this weekend and we're doing night flights. I'm scared of both ways. (laughing) No, no, no, the mornings are going to be good. The mornings are great. - I always expect them to fall back asleep when we wake them up at like four or five a.m. for a flight and they never do. And they just sleep before they're nap and they're fine. - And then honestly, I feel like the time zone change will do better. - Yeah, you're gonna be just fine. - Yeah. - Four or three, gosh, pop a show on. - Put them in, put them in a movie. Get them to like maybe a donut or something. - I would say literally just get them dressed and get them in their car seats and then they can eat breakfast at the airport. - Yeah. - And just like something easy. And I don't think it'll be hard at all. - No. - That's honestly an ideal travel day. Okay, not ideal because four a.m. is really early. But I feel like depending on how your kids wake up, for me, what we do if we have to wake them up, we turn off their sound machine first. - Yeah. - And kind of let them get like in a lighter stage of sleep because if I feel like they could be in really deep sleep before and then that can make them really sad when they wake up. - We do that too. - Turn off the sound machine and then just open the door and then kind of just make some noises you're packing up the last things. - Yeah. - Just ease them into as much as you can. - Yeah. - It'll be great. - That's great, that's great advice, exactly. - Hi Abby, I am expecting our first little one in October. And I know Abigail, you said that you have a hundred pound doodle, so do I, and I'm a little nervous. He's a really good boy. Of course, doodles are the best. But I'm just curious how you guys like transitioned with a newborn with your dog. If you could give me an advice there, that'd be great. Thanks. - That's a great question. I actually didn't think about it at all and I'm glad the people around me thought about it. Because I think my mom took a blanket of C.J.'s and we first got to the hospital to get like one of his swaddles and brought it back for Lewis to sniff so that he was kind of familiar with the smell of the baby. 'Cause the first baby, Lewis wanted to lick constantly. Like C.J.'s he was so excited. There was a little tiny human in there. And then Vivian, he could have cared less. He was used to it. So that first baby they get, at least Lewis did, got really excited. So and my mom got him some new toys that he was interested. He had other things to like preoccupy him. So I think bringing the swaddle home was really good to get the smell. Some new toys for your dog. And then, I don't know, what else did you guys do? - Yeah, we, I don't have a hundred pound dog, but I have two 75 pound dogs. - That's a hundred percent. - A hundred percent. - 'Cause he had a small apartment. We didn't really do anything. The only thing that I can think of that we did for sure was we brought, we took the dogs, we don't have a backyard. So we took the dogs out. I think I had my dad take them out. We brought Brielle into the apartment and got her settled and then brought the dogs back in on their leashes. - To meet her for the first time. And they were fine. They were really gentle, really kind. They, like whenever she would be sleeping in her little, I don't know, in her like portable stuff, like on our bed, the dogs lay around her and not bother her anything. So I didn't really have any issues. I would just say for that first introduction to have them on their leash. - Yeah, that's great advice. They'll be great. They'll look that quick. - I really think they adapt really quickly. - Told you that. - Hi, this is Cambria. I'm a long time listener, big family guys. I just wanted to call in and ask a little parenting tip. I've got a little nine-month-old baby girl. And I've been having a hard time figuring out naps when they go out to events or church during the day. What do you guys do to prep for events like that? Do you put them to bed before or do you have good ways to keep them entertained while you're out and about? Love you guys. - Cambria's start could be a really cool name. (laughs) Still thinking about that. - That's a good one. - That's a good name. - You're pretty flexible. - I know. I think I kind of have an idea. She's really good at taking one nap. So she's been being nine-month-old and I feel like just because she's had to adjust with her brother's schedule and like being out, she takes pretty much like three to four hour long, one long nap a day. So I try to have to schedule things around that. If we do, I'll bring stuff to prepare for her to sleep in her car seat and her doona. Or I can also wrap her. Like I know she feels, even if she doesn't fall asleep, she feels comfortable on the wrap. So I'll wear her if I'm out during a nap time. Just doing something to make them feel as comfortable as possible if they can't have, if your baby's not good at sleeping out on the go. Just doing stuff that you know makes them feel really comfort in. So either holding them close, having pacifiers, maybe an extra bottle, you know, just things that make them feel really comfortable. - Yeah, I feel like I deal with that because our church service starts at her nap time and I'm a scheduled person, so it frustrates me. So I have had to learn to adapt and I, she sleeps really well in the car. So I just pack up an hour early, 45 minutes early and head there and sit in the parking lot. Well, I get like a 30 minute nap in and then she does fine and then she naps on the way home and then we just adjust her naps her as the day. So I would just say if you can leave buffer time for them to take a short nap in the car. I think if they get a power nap 20 minutes, they're good, they're good to go. - That's good tip, yeah. She usually does a power nap and they're her long nap in the afternoon. So I'm going to get one solid good nap, they're fine. - Hi Abby, my name is Nadi and I love listening to your podcast, it's so awesome. And I'm just just wondering, so me and my husband are excited but we're thinking about starting our family soon and I was wondering what advice you have before we choose to start our family. I went to the bookstore, got completely overwhelmed with all the different books and all the different information. So I'm just wondering if you have any recommendation. Again, love the podcast, thanks. - Oh, congrats. She's the best personality, bubbly. - Yeah, such good energy. - I think my advice would be like don't try, I think the books, you're coming from a good place but that is not necessarily going to serve you right now. I think there's a time and a place for a book probably but the best thing that you could probably do is make friends with people that have babies. And that will be a really good realistic and also hopefully they're like very hopeful and encouraging too. And then you'll have built-in community as you enter that new season that already has kids and they understand the schedules and the things that come with it. And then your babies can play together and then you have mom friends together. - Thanks, great advice. Yeah, seeing it in real life. I feel like that was what was a really good turning point for me was seeing you guys with graffiti in your first, you know, just being able to see that life on life example of it made it feel a lot more, I don't know, doable. If you don't have that, I don't know, I feel like this could be bad advice if you're not typy but I feel like sometimes it's really easy to overwhelm yourself with information at the beginning and I think something that I've experienced both times is that the process of being pregnant, going to the doctors, preparing for your pregnancy and then having your baby in the hospital, going to the pediatrician, every step of that process prepares you for your baby. Like I just felt like our doctors and nurses were told it's what we need to know, our community told us what we needed to know. And then if we had questions the internet would help us along the way. And so you have so many resources throughout the journey to prepare. So yeah, maybe if you're just trying to get like a realistic example of what that looks like, yeah, peers and stuff. But yeah, I don't know if necessarily the books are going to be the best for that. - I think the longer that I have been a mom, which still isn't that long, I have a four year old. But the more I feel like the access, the over, like the too much access to information, - Oh, it's overwhelming. - Tunes out my personal instincts that like at first, I was like, yeah, and the information's like so important. But I do feel like you are equipped. Like you are designed to be able to meet your baby's needs. And of course, we have help. We have doctors and peters and all these things. But I just feel like a doled my in like, and made me not trust my instincts as much about things which now more than ever, I like really do trust my instincts. So just, I caution a little bit of that and I know it's coming from a good place. Like, I want to be prepared to know what we're doing. But just a little bit of caution. - Yeah. - You're gonna be, you're designed for this. You're made for this. So it's, don't feel like you need to do a bunch of research beforehand. - I think if anything in audit of maybe a couple of areas of your life, how am I, how are we financially? How are we meridally? How am I emotionally, how am I spiritually? Like maybe just do like an overview of those areas and any weak points that you see. It's like, oh, okay, not that they had to be perfect when you don't have to wait to be perfect to start your family, but maybe just have a plan going forward like, okay, financially, like we want to start, you know, doing this. So let's just start saving in this area. And then spiritually, we want to have community with our church. So let's join a small group now. Is that later we have? So I don't know, just like different areas, maybe do an audit and have make a plan. - That's great advice. - Like so you can show up. - Yeah. - As the best version of yourself. - Yeah. - I feel like, so I am a planner, I am in type A, but what I have realized now, I'm, what, Braille is almost 11 months old now, is that reading books about parenting or things like that, just don't apply yet. Like they don't, especially if you're not even pregnant yet. Like you can read it, but it's gonna be so different whenever you have a kid of your own. And so I would say just have fun with it at this point. And this is, I'm going into the conception conversation of like, just have fun right now. Don't worry about all the other things. Like the transition of, at least for me, of being intimate with your partner and like trying for a baby was just like such a fun transition of like, we definitely are trying not to do that too. - We're trying to make free time. - Yeah, yeah, we're trying to have a baby like it's so cool. - Enjoyed that fun side of that transition that you're in for now. And then obviously not everyone, that doesn't work for everyone. And then there's times where you can talk to people and get advice and read books and help in those areas too. - Yeah, great advice. - Hi ladies, I'm Dora. And my five month old just started teething. So I'm wondering if you have any tips. Thanks, bye. - Nora Stark wouldn't be too bad. - Nora Stark, that's so cute. - I love that. - Teething. - Gosh, to be honest, I never know when they're teething. - I got off way too easy with teething. - Me too. - I never had any issues. - They never got it until they're like, she didn't get it until she was almost a year. - She was sweet so it doesn't have her teeth. - She's nine months old. - My kids got 'em early than they still didn't have. - We're really getting a bunch, but it's not affecting your sleep. - Some kids it's not painful for, but it's painful, I just give Tylenol. - Yeah. Well, my kids got to leave that four months old. So I wasn't. - Yeah, you weren't gonna give them that long, yeah. But Haka makes a product where you can freeze breast milk. I remember doing this 'cause I thought I was gonna hurt him. And you freeze in this big old pacifier type thing. And so I think more than anything cold stuff feels really good on it. Like think about if you're having tooth pain, like what would feel good. So I would freeze breast milk because, I mean, they were super young. It was four months old. That's all they could have. - Yeah, totally. - And they would suck on that a lot. And I think that helped. And then also when they're a little older, I mean, you could give them like popsicles, pedeolite. - Just a lot of those teether quays or those. - The Haka thing, you can freeze fruit in it and then they could suck on that too. - Yeah. - Yeah, Tyler. - I've never had to do anything. I only gave Vivian, I think I gave her ibuprofen once 'cause I thought she was having a lot of teeth pain at night. We'll grow up in the middle of the night and she was screaming. So I'm like, I'm not gonna go freeze. I don't have anything frozen. So I just did that. And then for CJ, I think I gave medicine once for pain with teething. So yeah, I could feel like I got off kind of easy too. They would just chew on everything. - Yeah, I just had a lot of chewers then too. - Yeah, just a lot of chewing things. - Okay. - Sorry, I'm not chewing. - Yeah, I know I don't have much there either. - Dating and marriage? - Yeah. - We just have a couple questions in this one. - Hey Abby, my question for you is, would you choose comfort over community? My husband and I live in California and we're considering living out of state to be able to afford a more comfortable life. However, we would have to leave our family and community. If you were in our shoes, what would you do? - Thanks, love you guys. - They wanna leave community for a more comfortable life. As in, maybe like a bigger home and stuff. I'm assuming. No, I would always choose community over that personally. - I've lived without community before and it was probably the hardest time of my life. So, and I wouldn't have thought of that time as comfortable, exactly. Like, I think all those things are secondary to community, at least for me, and I think that you would find, I feel confident that you'd probably find that too, especially if you have good community where you're at. If you're like, oh, we're kind of plugged in or kind of like, we'd see our family like once or twice a month. Like, it's like that might be different. It depends on like how it is, but like, yeah, I wouldn't trade what we have now for. That would take a lot. - I guess too, it depends. Did she say they have kids? She didn't say. If you don't have kids, honestly, move away. And then come back. - It sounds like they don't have kids. - It's yeah, 'cause I think, I think when that really, when you need your village the most, is when you start to have kids, I agree. And Caleb, when I moved twice away from really solid community, away from our families in St. Louis, and then away from, we had a really strong church community in Kansas City to come here and we were able to build amazing community with you guys and with our friends. So it's not impossible to build community. I guess it depends on your personality type. Like, are you willing to get involved and put yourself out there and do types of things to like forge away and build community and go to these areas? And if it doesn't work, you could always go back, I guess. I don't know. - Actually, I agree. I think, okay, so I said I was like the hardest time in my life, but I do think that season grew me in a way that I couldn't have done within the community that I was in before, 'cause I was so comfortable. And so I think it took discomfort. And I think that time to do that is before kids. - Yeah. - And I don't think with kids, like now at this point, I would not risk that with kids being, like without having a family. - Yeah. - But I, yeah, I agree. It sounds like it's just her and her husband. 'Cause I feel like she would have said our kids too. - And actually, go for it. Don't move. Try something new. - You convinced me to have a guy. - Be uncomfortable in a comfortable home. You know what I mean? - You might not need to move to the middle of the Pacific Ocean. - No, yeah, yeah, don't go to an island, maybe. Or maybe. - Or maybe. - Okay, now, season cool. - You'll feel it out. Just see how depression goes. - Yeah, totally. (laughing) - Abigail tried it out, didn't work for her. - It didn't stick, so. - It's a terrible joke I make. - Sorry. I don't think, I don't know if we should put that in there. - I forgot that. - It's controversial. - But that's not depression. - Yeah, I thought. It's horrible, didn't I? - It's a bad day. - It's a bad day. - Okay, next one. - Hi, Abby, Abby, and Abby. I have a question. And first of all, I love your guys' podcast. It's my favorite thing to listen to. I look forward to every Friday and just sitting in a listening to your growth. But my question is, what was your guys' first dance song at your wedding? - Aww. - Thank you. Well, the podcast. - Thank you. What was your guys'? - Did you forget your ears right now? - The actual name of the song. (laughing) - Thank you. - Aww, yes. - What was yours? - It's Ed Sheeran and Beyonce. - When we were kids, we just fell in love. - What's that song called? ♪ And what it was ♪ - It's so perfect. 'Cause it spoke to like, big, young, falling in love, and then growing old, Ed Sheeran and Beyonce version. 'Cause I was like, we need the boy and girl version of this song. (laughing) - Yeah. - That's really annoying me. - That's really gonna bother me too, especially. - Because that's my first dance song. - Ed Sheeran and Beyonce. Should be the first one that pops up. - Oh, I thought you were thinking of myself. - No, I was thinking of my song. - She forgot her song, dear. Our just primer like that, I've been wrecked there. We love it. - Perfect. - Thank you, perfect. - I liked that song and then, like, told me that that was your guys' song, so we couldn't use it. - I remember like that was like our high school song. - And so we're like, if I didn't hear it. - That saved four songs. Three songs under our first dance song. So I saved it in the night. - I love it. - Our song, no matter where you are, it's by us to do it, which is a couple. - I love us to do it. - Yeah, baby. - They gotta be worse. - Forever, by the way. - Forever like that. - Oh, sorry. Forever like that. - I remember we do it a little bit right now. - Yeah. - I can play it too. - I can play it too. - ♪ You're a day lover ♪ - We listen to it sometimes if we're like, a mad at each other, it's like 10s. One of us was like, turns it up, slides. - And then we're like, you gotta read the room. - You gotta read the room. - I don't think we'd know. If I just stayed playing, yeah, I don't think so. - Oh my gosh. - Also like our high school, this is our love song. So it's the same one, but it's hard to be mad when you like, you're like, oh, we're so in love. - My rainy day lover. - Right. - Brick. - Shoot, okay. - Yeah, sure. And then you just have to dance and then, yeah. - Do you guys ever just dance in your house? - Yeah. But usually it's not until you slow songs. - But with your dance. - That's what I mean. Slow dancing. - Oh. No, usually put on like, no, pump it up. You got to pump it up. - If someone's there be a pump bit up. and Blake's not there, that's fine. - If you were to ask them, "Can we do a slow dance?" - Yeah, kill Blake. - Aw, yeah, he would. - Blake wouldn't do it. - Blake would be like, "Why?" - Are you okay? - He has to be more affectionate with Blake, I appreciate it. - We have to get into spits where I'm like, "Okay, I think we need to be more affectionate with each other during the day." - We need to be a couple again. - We need to be more affectionate with each other. - We gave each other how I'm gonna go, "Aw, affection." - I saw them hugged and I was like, "Wow!" (laughing) - We had to see each other all day. (laughing) - I love it. - Hi, my name is Erin. I'm calling from Wisconsin. I actually had a question for Abigail. So my husband, similar to it sounds like yours a little bit, works very often during the week. He's right now doing about 60 hour work weeks. And I would say sometimes it does take a toll. Overall just on us wishing we saw him more. And I would love to hear some practical tips maybe that you found that have helped with how much it sounds like Caleb works. Yeah, that would be awesome to see her a little bit about that love with me to the podcast by the way. And yeah, I hope to hear from you guys soon. Thank you. - Is she meeting like practical tips during the day or just like in general? Probably just for your guys' relationship. - Our relationship. Or like the stress of that. - It can be really hard sometimes when your spouse has gone long stretches. I think sometimes it helps me. I remind myself a lot. I'm like, I cannot get bitter or compare what Caleb and I are doing to each other time wise. I think it can be really easy to be like, oh he hasn't been here all day. Like he has no idea what's going on. I wish he was, it would be so much easier if he was here. You know, obviously like think those things. But I have to remind myself, like he wants to be at home just as badly as like I wanted to be at home. And he loves being home to his family. I think it's been good to not ever make him feel bad about his job because I trust that when he can be home, he prioritizes us to make it to come home. So never making him feel bad about his hours. And I think of trying to like hype up the culture of like when he gets home, like have the kids get excited, have CJ get excited. I think it helps Caleb a lot. If I can have dinner ready by the time he gets home and it's like he can just enter into home mode and chill and hang, we can have family time, quality time. And it's easy for him to transition to into then like helping with bath and doing all those things. So yeah, I think it's just figuring out what your rhythm is and within the house, like how you make him feel the most welcome back in and setting like the mood of the home when he's excited to come home and just relax and see his family too. And not making it like a, you come home and do this, this, and this, that type of vibe. Am I answering the question? You're a really good job of that. Thanks. I read a book a long time ago, a mirage book. And it was kind of like, there's going to be, I think our job is like moms and wives is like we, and this is exciting to me, like we get to set the tone of our house. Like we, Caleb does not care at all about like the day-to-day things really within the home. He is very much like a big vision of our family and our goals, but like I curate the day-to-day culture. And so am I going to set a house that feels like stress and anxious, or am I going to try to make a home environment that feels like you're excited to come home to? And so I always wanted to feel, for Caleb, to feel excited to come home to and to, you know, vice versa. So yeah, I just think of like the little ways that you can do that, because you just, I have to remind myself, my kill shop is so hard. Like I don't want to, I would never want to do that. So if I was doing that, how would I want to feel when I come home? I see my family. That's really sweet. I feel like you've said it before that you're like, this is a season I agreed to. Like that. That you guys like talked about and agreed upon. And I feel like that must be something you go back to a lot that you're like, I actually agreed to this hard. And this will be, this is just a season for us, you know? Totally. Yeah, thanks, that's, yeah, that is true. I forgot about that. I mean his is different, because he started a business. So it's like, yeah, I had to fully agree to the hours. And I'm like, hey, this is like our big vision. We have big vision goals for our future. And so yeah, if this season right now is really hard, you're working a lot. I'm okay with that. Knowing hopefully in the long run, it's like setting us up for hopefully this end goal that we want. And so I think it's just keeping your goals in mind. If it felt fruitless, I would get frustrated. But that's good. Everything has pretty good. Great last one for dating and marriage. - Hey, Abbie's and Abbie. I am calling because I have a crush on my teacher's assistant. He graduates with his master's, this month, and class also ends this month. And I'm currently in my junior year of undergrad. Please give me some advice because I really want to try and pursue it. However, I don't know how and I'm scared to reject them. I really love your podcast. And Abbie Friday, I look forward to it. So thank you guys so much. - That's really cute. Oh my gosh. - Oh, I don't know if I have good advice. - I'm gonna say, you just need to start baking some goods and putting them on a desk. - Only like to bake. - Because then you can go buy a ridiculous standard. (laughing) - You can go buy a lord me in with bakery when she doesn't even cook. - I think that's something you could totally confess later in dating. Like, I'm actually a bad cook, you know. - That's just a little something like, oh I just made extra and thought you might like these. - You know, just gonna put in yourself on his radar a little bit. - Okay. - Easing in. Is that too forward? - Certainly, she's talked to him before, right? - No, no. - All right. - Don't know what to do. - Let me think about this for a little bit. He's a teacher's assistant. I say, here's my tip. - Okay. - Casually make, did they do any grading? - Probably, they do all the grading. The teacher's not around. - Casually make a joke about giving you a good grade. - Uh-huh. - And then see if the conversation, gauge is interest from there. Find something in that conversation that you can kind of latch onto and circle back to the next class. And then just try to keep extending that conversation 'cause I get it. I feel like, maybe I'm just, you know, what is the word traditional. I don't like the idea of like going and making the first move, but that doesn't feel like a move, right? That feels like starting conversation and then give him an opportunity to then make a move. - That's what I'm saying. Like, big a tree, like, I just had an extra move though. - Really? - Yeah. - I feel like I'd make the first move. This is what I would do. I would, it's the last day. You're not gonna ever see him again. - Okay, that's stakes. - He's graduating. - Yeah. - So you get him a graduation card. You just give it to him and you grab a nice note. - Put your phone number. - And then put your phone number. - And then it's all new. - And then you never see him again, if not. - And it may be some big tree. - And it may go. - I just like to wait a minute. - What's the plan? - What's the plan? - If you're different brands before. (laughing) - Some cookies never hurt. - See, I need more context. - I'll see what type of man each person is. (laughing) - I have to be forward. - Yeah, you have to be forward. - I don't think giving them a treat or a note is the first move. I think you have to let them know. They can't read your mind. They don't know that you're interested. - I think that's what I need more context of like, are they friends? - Are you already kind of learning? Like, where are we at? - Or are you never spoken to him? - That is a whole different conversation. - And you've never spoken to him. - Then do my best. - Then you gotta do her method. If you have a little ongoing, like, oh, you make eye contact in a while, give him some baked treats. - And then give him a card with your number. (laughing) - Maybe he's asking for an extra credit assignment. And it's like, it's me on a date. (laughing) - That's not, that's not. - And we also was extremely forward with Caleb. She literally was like, all of our friends are going to see this movie. It was her and Caleb. - Yeah, that was, that was manipulation. (laughing) This is a bad move. - That's a bad move forward. You guys were both forward. - Wait, in your marriages, who made the, you made the first move. - I did, yeah. - Did you make the first move? - Yeah. But I didn't continue making the first move. - I had the crush first. - But I wouldn't say I made the move. I like asked to play cards with him. See, yeah, I'm not gonna like sit around just with this crush and not let them know that I'm like kind of interested. I feel like guys need to be, let them know that you're interested. - All of our church friends were hanging out every single day from lunch and Blake wasn't showing up and so one night at church I said, why aren't you showing it up? - Right, now I'm showing up. - You're gonna let him know. Like, I want you to see you there. - Right. - I agree with that. - Okay. - Okay. - Let it, look at you. - I'm like, can you hold back? - I'm a coward. - Please follow up with a voicemail. Let us know in a minute. - I want you to know how that ended. - Yes. - And if it didn't, and nothing happened, that's still an update. - Also, you should know that the fear of rejection is very real, and we all feel that, but you always gain something from that. And so, have you ever heard about that thing? That's like, you're trying to get people to, like literally, what do they call a rejection therapy? Where they basically ask you questions, like, hey, what are the odds that I can get this hotel room for a free tonight? - And they say no. - Yeah, like, the goal is to get people to say no to you. - Absolutely, we don't. - So you like get over that fear and then you learn to have boldness and confidence, and then also people are usually, you'd be shocked at things that people actually said yes to. They're like, I never thought they would say yes to that. I think people are also kind of respect that courage too. - Totally. - That's the worst thing they've ever done. - I was gonna say, I'm actually personally very invested in this. So, if you're on our Patreon, send us a DM. I'm way more likely to see it. If you're on our Patreon, if you're not subscribed, - And then send us a message. - Why don't you send us a email? - We will shoot your shot for you. - We're not afraid of rejection, we have a public podcast. We are, we're putting, we get, we get rejected every day. - We get rejected every day. - We got really good at it. So just let us fall on the store for you. - Yes. - Connor. - Connor. - Connor. - Someone comes of that. - I really wanna know. This is really miscellaneous. - Hi Abby. Abby and Addy. I just have a random question. I've been watching your podcast since the beginning and I absolutely love you guys. My random question is, why in Arizona do all of your backyards and your videos and stuff? It seems like you guys have brick fences instead of wooden fences. - Right. - Another to random, but I noticed that. - All right. Thank you guys for today. - Yeah, no, it's, yeah, I wondered the exact same thing when I moved here. I was like, is this a nice area or not a nice area? Everyone's just got cinder block walls. Like I didn't, like in the Midwest, if you have cinder block around your house, you're in a bad area. - Yeah. - So I hear I was like, where are the nice people like paint murals on them? - Yeah, I know. I don't know. I think it's just wood doesn't really survive well out here. - That's true. - That was my desk. - You have to treat it. - Yeah. - It's not wood doesn't, like it just, the sorry. - It's not on how to deal with it. - It's not how to deal with it. - Yeah, if you get like a wood in place that for your kids and you don't treat it, it will last one somewhere. - And if you get a metal fence, it's just so hot. - Yeah, you can't touch metal. - And the homes are pretty close to each other, so I feel like privacy. - It's probably more for privacy than anything. - Yeah. - They build things close on their lots here. We tell them it's for the hovelinas. - It's for the crannas. - We're right. - Wood quickly, wroughts, warps, cracks underneath the intense try. - The pipes are probably pretty intense. - It's intense. - They don't help keep on the center block walls. They do make your backyards extremely warm, so we came up and I just held TikTok and it was like, this is the shrubbery to plant around your center block walls to not trap the heat in. And one of the plants that they talked about, we had like 10 of those and we moved in and came up to them all out. He was like, this is ugly. And now like you literally ripped out 10 amazing bushes with flowers that keep the heat up. - He's like, I'd rather just see more rocks. - We replaced it with nothing so far, so saying it. - I'm like in the sherbet. - No, little. - Thank you to Merit Beauty for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. - Are you thinking that I look naturally beautiful today? - Every day you're glowing. - Thank you so much. I attribute that to Merit Beauty. - I love Merit Beauty. There are some of my favorite makeup products and skincare products. I love, love, love that they follow the EU Clean Standard of product care so you know that you're getting cleaner ingredients, really high quality products and everything that they've made is just very effective. The reason why I love it so much is that it's designed for women just like me, just like Abby, probably just like you, that if it's going to take more than maximum five, six minutes, it's simply not going to happen. Their products are designed to make you feel beautiful. Mostly just enhance what you've already got naturally going on. There have so many great products for the skin and for makeup. I've been using their Double Cleansing Face Wash recently upon your recommendation. I love that it's a foaming wash. It gets my makeup off super easy at night for makeup. I mean, you love their flesh balm. I love the flesh balm. I love their lipsticks. I love the clothes bespoke in everything that's like my shade. My sister has really sensitive skin. She gets rosacea super easily. The Uniform is her favorite product. Her skin looked amazing. If it's a no makeup day, no problem. Merit has great skin products like their skin serum is all you need it instantly hydrates and plumps for a fresh, do we look? I feel like I could talk about Merit all day long. So go check them out. Right now Merit Beauty is offering our listeners their signature makeup bag with your first order at meritbeauty.com. That's M-E-R-I-T-Beauty.com to get your free signature makeup bag with your first order meritbeauty.com. Hi Abby. Abby and Adi. I'm Adi. Calling from Tennessee. I was wanting to know what your favorite genre of books is to read. Personally, I like Romain to see or mystery flash fantasy. I just finished reading Wicked Is the Hollow is the two book series. Anyway, it was really good. I know that you already have a book picked out for next book, but maybe you should do that on a try. Anyway, hope you'll have a good day. Funny that you should mention that because we are talking about book club today. Yay. Which also we should mention book club on every episode just so people if they want to read the book. What the book is. Yeah. Come back to that. That's what I mean. Yes. Um, genres. What would you say? Well, okay. I think my favorite book I've ever read is The Nightingale. That's a historical fiction. So I really like that. I do like romance. I like like those every summer after ones. Those books. What's that kind of vibe? That's romance. Yeah. Okay. Sometimes I don't love like the graphicness of the romance, but I love the story. That's a whole different category. That's called smut. Okay. Don't like smut. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I actually really liked our murder mystery on this book this month. That kept me going. But it wasn't too scary. It was like a good mix. Mm hmm. I really like historical fiction and I also feel like my genre taste has changed. I used to really like thriller, but now I really like literary fiction. Like what is that? Like basically like a fiction that's not necessarily romance or thriller. Like a story. Which is a story. Like a story. Yeah. Like the correspondent to be a literary fiction. Okay. Yeah. I was like, "I'm going to be a writer." I was like, "I'm going to be a writer." I was like, "Wait, you never read it." I saw you had the summertime pretty series out there. Can I take those? Yeah, sure. Perfect. I don't want to read those, but I feel like I watched the show. And now I'm like-- That's why I want to read them. I also don't really like Young Adult, which I feel like that one is probably Young Adult. Oh, yeah. I do like Young Adult. I like Young Adult too. That feels very escapey. Yeah. A gritty. It's good. It's good. It's good. It's good. It's good. It's good. Try it over. Try it over. She said, "I'd be weird." Yeah. A gritty. A gritty. (laughs) Sorry, this was weird. Um, I was just wondering, does that look your death row meal? (laughs) I love you guys. (laughs) What about me? I want to be your friend. I don't want to know what your death row meal is. (laughs) I feel like she's been in with us. Oh, I like that. Oh, my gosh. That's great. What? That's so much better. I'm like starting to do something weird. I'm like, I can't really bend it down. (laughs) We're here now. That's awesome. Okay. You got it. Death row meal. Are these supposed to be like, you're like the most gluttonous meal because if I'm taking this so literally, I don't have to be able to eat. (laughs) (laughs) If I don't death row, don't guys be eaten. I'll be throwing it up. (laughs) Oh, my gosh. That's awesome. Also, I do think that this isn't even a real thing. Like, most states were probably just to give you whatever they've been given you. Yeah. Took it way too literally. Okay, but if you can't go to safe-- If you had to answer the question, I'm going to-- As she insisted. - Oh my gosh, it's sushi, it's sushi. - Oh my gosh, I had sushi yesterday. - Oh my gosh, yeah. - How good sushi is? - It is good. - Specifically, you said, yeah, salmon and giri with eel sauce, and I know it's specifically, I said how my cat is. - I was really cold girl, but you, - I know, I think you've brushed past it. - Yeah, I was like, she know? - Does she know? - Okay, salmon and giri. - Sorry. - Tuna and giri, what'd you say? - Oh, yeah, like a tuna to turkey one. Rainbow roll, dragon roll. - I love a rainbow roll. - Nothing with crab, I just want salmon. - Oh, I like crab. - And tuna. - What's imitation crab? - I would still enjoy it. - I do still enjoy it. - You're the one who said to me the other day. - Tlappia? - That's a fake fish. I'm like, you ain't eating artificial crab. - Wait, Tlappia. - There's something that's like grown. - That's what it is. - Tlapp. - It's a franken fish, it's not a fake fish, it's a real fish, but it's a franken fish, like it's literally just made to be eaten. - Yes. - Yeah, it doesn't look like it exists in the wilds. - Yeah. - It's a bobbist, man. - So we won't wild con, not that farm raise. Unless it's imitation crab, give me that fake crab. - That's a hypocrite. - Yeah, okay, I would say I have two vibes. It's either a friend of mine. - And this is what you said afterwards. You said just so you know. (laughing) - That's what she said. - I was like, well, that's actually great macro. (laughing) - That's her touchman, as long as you know. (laughing) - That's what you said. - Why don't you call me out in the moment. - Yeah, I'm a touchman. - That's what you said. - I'm a touchman. - I'm used to it, don't you. (laughing) - Oh my God, that's hilarious. - I'm apologize, but I was right. (laughing) - That's what I'm just kidding. - I'm just kidding. - Okay, there's Freddy's burger with shoestring fries and a big ol' thing ice cream. That's like one vibe and then my other vibe, I want Lebanese food and I just want all of it. - Specifically, gray bleeds, meat pies. Do you eat Lebanese food out here? - I haven't found the best stuff. I'm not even trying to say the word, but it's lentils and rice and ginger. Yeah, I've tried a couple different places. I mean, I just like Middle Eastern food in general and they usually all have similar stuff, but. - It's so good. - Kibi. - Yeah. - I want El Magui rice chicken queso. - With a side of tortillas and a margarita. - Yeah. - Yeah, that's specifically El Magui. - Specifically. I think that was something that I ate a lot in calls and I looked at a plate, I was like, this is just a brown meal. - It's all brown. It's just white rice beans right there. - White chicken and white cheese and it's incredible. - It's so good. - I could not poop it is. - But unbelievable meal. - What is it? - The white cheese. - It's called arrow's compollo. - Oh, it's so good. You're right, Adi. That's a ton of chicken and cheese. - At El Magui or no, it's at. - Oh, gosh. - Poio con queso. - Oh yeah. - I mean, it's just chicken and cheese. - There's not, there's, because if Phoenix, I feel like it's just like real Hispanic food, that's very different than what we get in Missouri. - I can't get better here. - I know, I can't get better here. So when I go back to Cancun, that's what I get. - If you're gonna come to Phoenix, you have to eat at. - Well, shoot. - It's just Kibi me. - What's the Mexican restaurant? - Absolutely, it's in South Mountain. - I can't get the name. - The most unbelievable Mexican food I've ever had. Cocina Madrigal. - I was really like just, wait, and why was that lit, Adi? I was thinking that my head, Cocina Madrigal was like, "No, that's in contact." Cocina Madrigal, no, that's in contact. That's an unbelievable restaurant. - That's really good. - It is so good. So if you come to Phoenix, you have to go to Cocina Madrigal. - Okay, next one. - The steak tacos from Cocina Madrigal. Be my death row. - And my question for you is I want to know what your opinion and view is on friendships and the opposite, like, in dating. So whether it's like a boyfriend having a group, or a friend or a girlfriend who has guidelines, I would just love to know what your thoughts and opinions on that. Absolutely, you have to podcast. Thanks so much, guys. - I want to know the story. - Yeah, I'm fine with the friends, friends. Yeah, besties. You're not gonna be bestie with another girl, I'm sorry. No, but you can be friends and hang out and like, with groups. No, there's nothing one on one happening. That's for me, do you know what I mean? - Yeah, I had a couple of guy friends that I was pretty close with. And then when I started dating Blake, I realized I didn't need them anymore. So that's my only thought there, which shows there was also, there was another level to it at that point. So, yeah, 'cause there were other boyfriends I had that I still was friends with those guys. - Yeah. - It came to Blake for some reason. I was like, I don't need those guys. - Yeah, yeah. - You need more. - Yeah, I think friends are fine. - I'd be really sorry. - You're going off if Blake's tied it. - I think it's a personality type. If Blake had a girl best friend, I'd be so thrilled. I'd be weird. - Not best friends, friends. We had a lot of like girl and guy friends that we'd hang out and groups with. Most of them were in relationships. - You sure have. - I was like, they were talking to Matt more or so and it was like, we were just only hanging out in a group. - Right. - Yeah. - No, I think-- - I think just fine. You should have friends at the opposite sex because I think it's healthy. But yeah, no, you're not going to hang out with them. Like, you want to one in it, you know what I mean? - No. - Yeah, groups, great. - The only guys that I ever hung out with one-on-one were Blake's roommates. Mostly because I was waiting for them. - Yeah, I remember hanging out at his house waiting for them to come. Like, there was never us going to do something. - Yeah, you weren't going to their house to hang out them. - No. - You were going to hang out Blake. - Exactly. - Hi, Abby. And Abby, my name is Lila and I was just wondering, what is one thing that you wish you could then differently in high school? - Cash, why do I always come back to the same thing? It's not good advice. I wish I cared less about my grades. - You guys asked my mom, I was a little bit intense. - Okay, yeah, you were extreme. - Yeah, like, I was like, maybe that didn't matter that much. Like, that was maybe, everyone has different personality type traits. Like, maybe relax, maybe just relax. Maybe just have a little bit more fun. Maybe go to bed. It'll be okay. So, yeah. - Yeah, I mean, I think it's real. I really stressed myself out. - Don't stress out in high school. - Yeah, and I like, I literally, and it carried on. - Sure. - I literally only got one B, my entire existence through college. - Yeah. - And it wasn't in college. It was in high school and I never lived it down. I was like, I'll never do that again. It was a quarter, I got a B. My semester grade was still in A. Like, I literally, like, couldn't, it wasn't important. No one's caring, no one's asking about my GPA was ever since I actually gotten to college. And even then, I got into a college at acceptance like 95% of that apply. So, I mean, really girl, it really was that serious. Like, go to bed. - Did you get a good scholarship? - I got a scholarship. - Yeah, nice. - Okay. - Yeah. - I don't think I wish it would've done differently. It's kind of hard to, like, think back to. - I wish I didn't have as many boyfriends. - Yeah. - Honestly, yeah. - I just always needed a boy. - Honestly, I think being content, being single, 'cause I started getting killed my senior year, and I dated different guys before. I always felt like I had to, like, talking to a guy. And that's just not really healthy. Like, that's not necessary. So, I think maybe just being more content and singleness, and, like, I have, I had amazing girlfriends, like, three or three really tight girlfriends, and they're still some of my best friends. So, just, like, really enjoying my time with them in high school. More so than maybe being sad that I wasn't invited to, like, the bigger things going on. - Hi, ladies. I wonder what your thoughts are for engagement rings? Are you a team real diamond? Or a team lab-grown diamond? And what do you think is appropriate to spend on a ring if you're a guy? Love you guys so much, thanks. - Mine's Moisonite. Mine is also Moisonite. Mine's real. Oh, my bands are flipped. Mine wasn't hit me down from the family. I, no, I just think, get what you can afford. Yeah, I don't think there should be pressure to do anything outside of your means. I think the temptation sometimes, but the Moisonite rings is that people can now afford a bigger rock. You can just get, well, looks classy and nice on your hand. Don't just go bigger because you think it looks, it's like a thing. I think sometimes a smaller diamond looks really beautiful and classy and nice. So I think go based off what looks best on your hand, not based off of, like, what's the biggest rock I can get, you know? - I don't know, I'm like, some people have a big old rock and I'm like, that's their personality. - No, but they look amazing. It's like good for their hand. - You know what I mean? - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Oh yeah, I literally think the look of the ring matters actually is zero percent. And actually the stone inside of it really matters zero percent, too. I think we were kind of like told a lie. It's literally just about the meaning of wearing the ring. And so that's why almost my promissering them that gave me an high school batters equally to my wedding ring, if that makes sense. 'Cause like, at that time, like, we literally knew we were gonna get married. So then I was like, this was like, it meant something really special. I was like, okay, we can't do it right now 'cause we are literally way too young. But like, it meant the promissed hat carried that similar weight obviously not the same as getting married. But yeah, just literally whatever you like. - Yeah, yeah. - I would say, don't get, oh, sorry, Eddie. - No, I was just gonna say, get what you like. - Yeah. - And also, if you're wanting to get married young, and you need to get a moison at your ring, - For that to happen, do it. - Don't let the price of a ring stop you. Like, I wanna diamond ring, so I'm not gonna get married [BLANK_AUDIO] five years so we can afford it. - Right. - We intend to do it. - What is that? - You can always agree later, if you want to. - They need to, like a man needs to spend like three months of income. That's so-- - That was a marketing. - So stupid. - That's still could have been the case 'cause Blake's income was really low. - Yeah. (laughing) - Yeah, you're like-- - No, I probably never did. - Yeah, probably. - But that's just, that's just dumb. It doesn't matter what they spend on the ring. - No, it doesn't. And I don't say go have fun like trying on rings. Go look at them. It's a really fun experience. Get what you like. I would say match your ring to the type of jewelry that you, like I wish I got gold. I only wear gold jewelry. I got white. So whatever this is, white gold because I honestly didn't know that it came in gold at the time. I was like, well yeah, everyone, I know, has white gold. - Everyone at the time is doing white gold. - Yeah. - Yeah, and I wish I would have gotten gold setting 'cause I only wear gold jewelry. - So, I don't know, just gonna-- - Even lab will change. - Like that's the thing, don't, it's just gonna change. - That's what I'm saying, don't get something trendy. But someone told me they're like, but gold doesn't make your diamond shine as bright or whatever. And I was like, oh, okay, well, I wish I would get white gold then. - Do you know what I'm happy I never did? I'm glad I never soldered them together. - I didn't do that either. - Yeah, I like that mine are soldered together. - Really? - Yeah. - Some people like to wear just the wedding band, and I was like, I'll do that. I literally have never done that in my life. - I wear just my band a lot. - Isn't it weird we've never lost our wedding rings? - It's a lot weird. - Good thing I haven't. - You haven't lost your second one. - Haven't lost my second one. - But we lose earrings. - We lose necklaces, we lose jewelry. - That's because this has a special place that it goes when I'm not wearing it. - Here's the thing, I got a trendy one, but I would still, if I lost this one, I'd still try to get this exact same ring. So I just think it's more, just about the meaning behind it. - Totally. - I've heard the men should have a question about the men's. - I love a man with a fun ring. - I love that. - I wanted to get Matt a ring, and he ordered his own from China. - Yeah, it wasn't like $5 when he kept bragging. - $5 was shipping was more than the ring. (laughing) - Now he just wears rubber ones, and I want him to wear a real ring. - We got a $75, it's like a nice ring. I think it's aluminum. No, titanium. - Probably titanium. - Titanium, and it's got the beveled edge, and it's kind of a brushed look. So it's a little more rugged. And he wears it. I love that he wears it. It looks good. And as it's kind of gotten scratched, I think it looks really cool. But I also love when the men get the diamonds. - I like it when the men have a diamond ring. - I love it. - I love it. - My grandpa had one. I think that's why I like it. - I like it. - I love that. So I don't know. Just do what you think is fun. - Yeah. - And when your bunch of rings is beautiful. - My mom's really. - It's like, I can't even describe it. - It's gorgeous. - Like those trendy ones. I'm like, I love them, whether it's two big stones, but it's like they are not quite touching. - You remember that? - I don't know if I like overlapped the different shapes. - I like it. - I think I haven't seen a ring I haven't liked, to be honest. - I have. (laughing) - Hi, I was actually really curious about you, Adi. I was curious how you began to work for the Howard's, how you got the job as it was just your Abbey's brother and they needed somebody to help film or what. And yeah, and I'm also curious how other Abbey and both of the Abbey's started to always hear if it was just an idea and you thought it'd be fun or how that came to be. - Oh, no, that's some tea. - That's good. - I love you, Adi. - Oh, I love you. - Let's spin it over on Patreon. - Is she a Patreon member? - I don't know. - If not, we'll email you the answer. - Yeah. - Okay. (laughing) - We'll give you an exclusive Patreon link. - See you in your questions, Adi. - See you in here. - Okay, our little book club segment, we did go into more detail on our Patreon, but we do wanna give you guys a little recap. We read, "Listen for the Lie" by who? Amy Tintera? - Yes. - Okay, so they're not even a close name on Patreon. I really enjoyed it. I gave this book a four. I thought it was a super, super fun listen, which I don't normally like listening to books, but this was a really fun to listen to. I was engaged the whole time. I really liked the ending. So I gave it a four. I thought it was a fun book. - Yeah. I gave it a five. I really liked it. I read it in two days. It got me back into liking. I'm like, "Oh, I need to read thrillers again." Murder mystery type books, 'cause I really liked them. - So this was a book that you would say would get you back into reading if you're in a slump? - Yes, I was in a slump. I wasn't going to slump, I'm not right now. But I was like, "Oh, I forgot that I liked this genre so much." I was just so into romance. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I would say it was very entertaining. Also a little forgettable for me, but could have been because I read a similar book right before it. Literally a podcast murder mystery. So I think that's why I was like, "Oh man, I'm maybe not in the mood for this exact type of read, right?" I like to switch it up dramatically between each prepared. - That makes sense. - I do it a three. I wouldn't necessarily recommend it, but I thought I was entertaining. Like if someone was already reading it and be like, "Oh yeah, I read that." - Yeah. - You remind me what happened again. - Yeah. - But yeah. - Did you guys guess the killer? - Yeah. - You did. - At some point I did. - At some point, obviously like I wasn't like early on. - Yeah, I think towards the end when they dropped the, when she talked about kissing someone that night, when she remembered that, I think that's when I guess too was. - Yeah. - But I didn't, I didn't catch on quick. I would say it wasn't quickly. - You would still ask me about that part was the boob grab. I was like, "That's a little." - That's why I was like. - In the boob grab game. - The boob grab. - A lot of the men in this book were very forward with their kisses. - There were a lot of, they were all just kissing her. - I was like. - Different, religious. - She and not each other. - She's crazy. - But her ex-husband would just kiss her. The podcaster would just kiss her. - She just a lot of happened. - Her eye school best friend would just kiss her. I'm like, "Honey, I'm so sorry." - That's crazy. - She wanted it. - Not from two of the three. - That's true. - No, she didn't just stand up for herself. - Next book, we decide it's gonna be "Yellow Face" by R.F. Quon. - Mm-hmm. - And I'm really kind of going in a little bit blind. - I just knew this is an obsessed and I was interested. So. - Mm-hmm. - Okay, always hungry. - Okay, fine. I just made this recipe the other night. - Oh, wait, it's the one that you ate. - I ate it. - It was good. - Yeah, it was really easy. It was delicious. It's a Hawaiian chicken sheep pan. So it's just bell peppers, some pineapple, red onion chopped up with some chicken. - Do you use fresh pineapple? - I did. Yeah, it was really good. - I think that's what made it better. I don't like canned pineapple. - Yeah, I don't know why canned fruit just in general kind of makes me a little weary. - Mm-hmm. - So yeah, I did fresh pineapple and you get the bigger chunks. - Yeah. - And you just want to buy it. - Yeah, you eat so good. I will say this recipe was a little confusing. When I read it, you know when they have like, the story about their grandmother and like all the descriptions. And so I never read that. - I actually am glad I did on this one because there were some tips in that that she didn't include in the instructions below that I think made a big difference in the recipe. - Okay. - 'Cause I was a little confused reading it. I'm like, wait, when do you make the, she had two different timings I wanted to make the sauce. So read the description and the instructions on this recipe. - It tasted like in a good way, take out. - Yeah, it did. It was like take out at home. - Yeah. - Yeah me. - I'm just gonna link my frozen s'mores recipe I used because people were asking my stories for, I used it for the Fourth of July party. It's fun, something else I do on a flag is that the recipe is weird because the, so how you do it frozen s'mores, you lay it down some graham crackers and then in a baking dish and then you do a chocolate layer and it's like chocolate pudding essentially. And then like a cool lip vanilla layer and then top it with more graham crackers. But when you put the chocolate layer in, it's literally so liquidy that all the graham crackers just float into the top. And I was like, well, how do I, I was like, what did I do wrong? I'm reading over this recipe again. I'm like, this is so easy. How did I mess this up? I don't think it's supposed to do that according to the recipe, but I just pushed the graham crackers back down, like let them sink back to the bottom. Freeze the chocolate layer and then go back and put the cool lip layer on because it logistically was never gonna work otherwise. There was no way you'd be able to spread. Interesting, that makes sense. So I'll link that one's really fun and easy. Great for summer and especially because we don't really have a way to make s'mores other than like, we don't have a great way at our house, but this is really fun. Bonus points, if you watch the sale, I'll while you eat them. (laughing) So very putrid. Yeah, well, amazing, you guys, that's so fun. I love the Weiss Muppets, though. So fun. That's a great way to bring, like, took a vacation during this episode. It felt great. There's a couple of gaps in my head. Oh, I didn't realize it. I mean, it's a lot of us talking and thinking about responses, so I feel like this was a little bit more of a, you know, what'd be thoughtful on their answers. Yeah, so it's okay to take a little brain break. I'd never noticed, though. Do you want to read the review this week? 'Cause I think you read it yesterday. This one is from Alexa Bohr Boom. I love listening five stars. I've followed Matt and Abby for many years and I always loved seeing Abigail and Adi in their content. So when this podcast was announced, I was so excited and listened every week. Because I'm an early bird, my roommates know that it's my routine to watch the podcast on Saturday, mornings before we start our weekend plans. I'm only 20 years old, but I have similar values to you three and hearing your stories, advice, and opinions makes me excited for the next season of my life, which will hopefully include marriage, children, and continued great friendships. Oh. So sweet. Sounds like we could be great friends. Yes. Thank you so much for that. That's really sweet. Really seriously. Thank you guys so much. I can't say enough how much it means to have your support and that we get to work with our sister-in-laws. Like, how cool is that? Even calling it work is just a little bit wild because obviously there are like, there's a lot of logistics that go into this. And that's also why you're using me so much, but it is really cool that we get to do this. And because of you guys, so we're really grateful. It's a grateful. So I look forward to that. Thank you for asking us to do this and making this happen. Yeah, this episode really came with some backstory, too. God. I know, I was talking to you for that, not them. I was saying, thank you for making this hot. - Oh, this hot top. - Yeah, I love you guys and just, thank you guys, thank you for making it happen and we love always here. - Thanks for being here and remember, we're always here. (upbeat music)