Avery Woods On Building Her Dream Life, The Dark Side of Internet Fame, & Overcoming Her Lowest Mental Health Battle __

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Oh my God, am I going to cry? Let me just unload everything. New episodes every Wednesday. Leave those filters at the door because it's time to get real. Hello, everybody, and welcome back to RealPod. I'm so excited because today's guest. is truly as real as it gets. She is unapologetically herself. She knows who she is to her core. She's overcome a lot in her life, and I truly think her story is so inspiring. She is truly one of the it girl content creators. When I think about the TikTokers or Instagram baddies who are dominating the game right now, Avery Woods is one of those people. She's the host of her podcast, Cheers, which I was recently on. So after you listen to Avery on RealPod, make sure you check it out. Check out my episode of Cheers. I had such a fun time with her. On today's episode of RealPod, Avery is going to talk about how she went from working multiple 12-hour shifts a week, grinding for every dollar to becoming a booming content creator, providing for her entire family. She's also going to open up about a very difficult time for her and her mental health. I believe she says it was the most difficult time for her and how she overcame that. And the number one reason she believed that she pulled through as someone who has hit rock-bottom on her own mental health journey, I know what it feels like to really contemplate everything and to contemplate life. And I commend Avery for being so open about that today. If you're feeling alone or you're struggling, Avery is here today to show you that vulnerability is a strength and that it does get better. Avery's also going to talk about all the highs and lows that come with her career and the boundaries she's put in place to make it sustainable for herself physically and emotionally and inspire you to look at your own life and see what boundaries might help you thrive. As well, make sure you check out Avery on Instagram, on TikTok, on YouTube, and without further ado, please help me welcome the iconic Avery Woods to RealPod. Avery, welcome to RealPod. Thank you for having me. It's so nice to be here. It's so nice to have you. Well, congratulations. You're moving into your house this month. Yay. I'm like crossing my fingers two weeks. That's when it's supposed to happen. But it's felt like a long time coming, but also we did the renovation really fast. I'm really grateful for that, but I just am excited to move my family into our forever home for sure. And will it be done done or like done enough that you can live in it and some things are being worked on? No, like pretty much done done. They're doing all the final touches right now. And then our incredible interior design team moves all the furniture in for us. So we kind of just get a walk in and it's there, which is so nice. I've never even had movers before. Yeah. I don't even know that everything works like, cause furnishing a home is so hard. You see the carpet, the rug, like is that all been done electronically and you're praying or? Yeah, no, I, that's why I'm like, honestly, so grateful for my interior design team. I've always done everything myself and obviously like when we were a cop and a nurse, we didn't have the funds to be able to afford an interior design team. So I feel so grateful for that, but I know I have decent style when it comes to like picking out certain furniture items and I know what I like, but it's like you said, the little details that you don't think about, like what trim on the curtain, what curtain rod ring goes with this? Like I don't think about that stuff. So they really helped figure it out and they use like this crazy AI graphics thing where they'll set up your entire room, like room by room. And you can see down to even the light sconces, what every detail looks like. So you can kind of see, and I'm, I'm very like outspoken in particular. I mean, it's our home. Right. Like, Hey, not really vibing with this. I'm thinking something more like this. And I send a lot of inspiration from like my Pinterest. I love Pinterest. I can imagine what today's technology they're like, put these goggles on and you're in your home. No, it's crazy. It's actually insane. It's amazing what they can do. And they whip it up so fast. I did want to rewind because you have a really cool story. I feel like people might come across your page today if they discover you for the first time and not know that you used to be a pediatric ICU nurse, which is like no easy fee and no simple job. What was it back in the day that inspired you to pursue nursing? There was a home video that my dad took when I was two years old and I say I wanted to be a nurse. So that was my only career path that I ever really looked into. I loved watching medical shows. Like my dad would always have them on in the background and I just remember being so interested in that. And I first wanted to pursue medicine. I wanted to be a doctor, so that was my first choice. And then I kind of did research as I was growing up. I was like, I want to be a nurse. I want to be a doctor. I was getting older. And when I say getting older, it was like young, like elementary school or probably junior high. I would talk to people about it. My parents had friends in the medical field and I was always very nerdy. I loved school. I loved science. And I remember in high school taking AP anatomy and that was when I was like, okay, this is what I want to do for sure. But I loved the intimate connection that nurses had with their patients compared to doctors. And don't get me wrong, there are incredible doctors out there. Especially working in peds, there is much more of an intimate connection with physicians and patients compared to the adult world. But I just loved that nurses spend, you know, 12 and a half hours a day with the same patients and they really get so bonded with them. And I've always been like a very caring, nurturing person and I've also loved kids my whole life. Like even when I was super, super little, my mom, she would ask me, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" And if I didn't say nurse, I would say a mom. many baby dolls and loved changing diapers. I was babysitting at like 10, 11 years old, all the neighbor's kids. And so it was like the perfect combination of nursing and also kids. So I originally wanted to be a NICU nurse. That was my plan. And then when I got into nursing school and we started doing clinicals, I requested to be in the NICU for multiple shifts. Nurses in the NICU are angels on this earth. Like I think nurses in general are angels. And I think they're so underappreciated, underpaid, overworked, but NICU nurses have such a special place in so many parents' hearts. And I remember being such awe, but I also was moved from the NICU to the PICU for one of my clinical shifts. And I had never heard of the PICU. I didn't know the difference and a lot of people don't. So for those that don't, NICU is neonatal ICU. Those babies are hospital because they had never left. They were considered sterile. So they were in the NICU. If those babies had left the hospital, they're considered what we call quote dirty. It doesn't mean dirty, dirty. It just means they're no longer sterile because they've been outside of the hospital. So they're exposed to other germs and things. So when they're admitted, they'll go to the PICU. So I took care of kids from newborn to age 17. And when I shadowed nurses in the PICU, I just immediately was in love. I knew it was exactly what I wanted to do. You get your baby cuddles. You get to interact with toddlers. You have elementary school kids. You have teenagers that are close to graduating high school. So you have that great connection where you can cuddle a baby, but also talk with kids about what they're going through and why they're there. And so it really felt like the best of both worlds. And I also loved the high acuity aspect. I loved being in the ICU. It's such a fast paced environment. I always say you're using your adult brain because at home with my kids, I feel like I'm not using my adult brain. So I loved it because I really felt like I was using my education and working a level on trauma. You have a lot of really, really sick kids, but I loved it because we had the opportunity to see them when they were admitted and so sick that sometimes you feel like they wouldn't make it. And then you're able to watch them walk out with their parents, which is really, really special. So, wow, that's incredible. And even today you speak about it with so much passion, right? But your path took you. A different route. And you started posting TikToks and videos about your life as a nurse. You also were a nurse during COVID and talked about being burned out. So how do you kind of process and cope with the fact that you had this love for something, but it was, I don't know, more depleting or demanding than you ever really thought. And then you had this attractive pivot into content creation, which you have an incredible talent at. So, yeah, how do you kind of look back on everything and to where you are now? It's interesting. I almost feel like I'm more nursing because I never, ever expected, to leave it. And I'll have a lot of like my OG followers say, remember when you said you would never leave nursing? And I did. That was something I was very adamant about. People watched my social media grow. And in my Q and A's, they would say, would you ever leave nursing? And I always said, no. But you don't really predict in social media your life to change the way it has. Like I never predicted my following to grow as much as it did and to have these opportunities that I've been able to take for my career, my family, which I'm immensely grateful for every single day. But you get to a point where the lines begin to blur a little bit, where your patients or your patient's parents know who you are, or people will find your place of work and show up to work. And you feel like you have this intimate connection with your followers, but at the end of the day, you don't know who they are. They're strangers. So when people are calling and asking what shifts I'm working or standing outside of the secure unit, you don't know who they are. They're strangers. They're strangers. So when people are calling and asking what shifts I'm working or standing outside of the secure unit, trying to get in, you know, that did this happen. Yeah. So that, that becomes a problem. And then I did aesthetic nursing as well. And I was having, you know, people call and try to make appointments to get Botox filler, that kind of thing. And I had a really scary experience where I was booked for an online consult for a man, which is very common that men will get Botox, but he was out of state and he said he wanted to come travel from, I think it was Colorado, to Arizona to get Botox because the prices were cheaper, which was kind of interesting. So I'm like, well, then you're paying for traveling, but whatever. So he ended up not showing up to the online console on zoom. And so he, we ended up calling his phone number and I can immediately tell on the phone that something was weird. And so I got the owner who is still a great friend of mine and she's amazing. She owned the med spa that I worked for. And I put it on speaker because I was like, I just want to witness for whatever this is. Long story short, someone had used my photos for like a catfish situation where she was requesting money from people. And he sent a bunch of money to this person thinking it was me. And then he reversed Google image, searched, found my profile and booked a consult for Botox of what we thought was Botox in order to speak to me because he wanted to get the FBI involved to get his money back. And he was, some of the first questions he was asking me, he's like, so you're married. And I said, yes. What does this have to do with me giving you Botox? Cause I have, I have no idea what's going on. Meanwhile, he thinks you're his wife. Yeah. So I'm like, imagine he came in thinking that I'm this person, right? That he has this online relationship with it. He's sending money to, but it's really not me. So that was when it started to get a little bit scary for me. Interesting. So almost your level of fame on the internet started to become a thing. Yeah. A huge issue that affected your ability to even just do the job of nursing. Oh yeah. Or I would get letters in the mail from the state board of nursing investigating my license because haters on the internet would call the state board of license and report all these things that were false that I was stealing Botox from. I shouldn't be allowed to work with minors because I show my kids on the internet because I was a PICU nurse. And it was interesting to me because I had already left PICU at that point after the pandemic. But so the, anyway, state board of nursing had to come in and question the owner of the med spa. And she's like, no, this has never happened. And of course all the investigations were dropped, but I'm like, these people have so much hatred for someone they've never met that they want my license to be taken away. So, so to this day, my, my license is active and I'm really grateful for that and I'll probably keep it up. But even though I'm not actively working as a nurse, I still try to advocate for nurses as much as I can. I've worked with St. Jude in the past and helped raise money with them because I think what they do is absolutely incredible. And then I want to continue on doing things for pediatric patients in the future, especially with the holiday season coming up. So you mentioned people on your old lives who would say, you said you'd never leave nursing. What do you say to people who say we miss the old Avery Woods? I think everyone on social media gets that right of like, I miss the old so-and-so. I think as we get older, we all grow and evolve and change. And am I the same person? Absolutely not. But I experience is kind of mold you into whoever you are today. And I feel like I wouldn't be the same person without nursing. I wouldn't be the same person without social media. I wouldn't be the same person if I wasn't married or didn't have kids. I was a different person before kids, before nursing school, before I got married, like everyone changes. And I think people have maybe a hard time with you changing your life. Or maybe being in a different place in your life because they originally followed you for something, right? So maybe they originally followed me for nursing. And now that I left nursing there, they no longer want to follow me because they can't relate to me anymore. And that's okay. I feel like the beautiful thing about social media is that we get to kind of pick and choose who we want to follow. Because I always say to social media should be a happy place. I feel like it's gotten so negative that it's like, you should follow people that you want to support and follow and you enjoy their content. And if I'm not that person for them, that's okay. I feel like not everyone's everyone's cup of tea, you know, whether it's on social media or in real life. Right. I used to post a lot about my mental health struggles because I started creating content as a college volleyball player. And I was at the time depressed in the throes of an eating disorder, anxious. And sometimes I'll be like, oh my gosh, has my content gotten too happy? Because I'm like, not struggling anymore. And then how the irony of me and my life being like, no, we need to be like anxious or depressed because we haven't posted a mental health thing. You know what I mean? But I am inspired by the way that you are like, I'm growing and evolving in my life. And if it doesn't serve you, it doesn't serve you. But I'm not going to change and act like a different version to keep people around, right? That's inauthentic. And that's not going to feel good to live a life like that. I think it's relatable to anyone who might feel like they have friends who say you've changed or I liked it better when you worked this little job in our town. And now you're pursuing this and it makes me feel insecure. Or, you know, your parents or your family like when you play that role in their system and you don't anymore and it doesn't work for them, but you're actually thriving. There's a very prevalent thing in social media that I've noticed and a lot of other creators have noticed is they support you, support you, support you until you get to a certain plateau and then they drop you. They don't want to support you anymore. And I think that has to do with not being relatable anymore because of the money that comes along with social media. I think that is so different from a lot of people on social media. And I think that a lot of creators on social media have either done this for the majority of their career and this is how they started or they didn't share so much of their career before and they only shared bits and pieces of their life online, maybe like makeup videos or blogs, but it didn't have to do with their career or their work. I shared so much of my nursing career and nursing school and that's how I started. And then I kind of pivoted my content. And so I think that's kind of where the change and shift maybe came from a little bit. And with the monetary possibilities of this job, I feel like the ceiling is through the roof and we see people talk about that all the time. And so I think that's kind of where the change and shift kind of came from a little bit. In my recent solo episode, I talked about how I am making some upgrades to my fitness routine this fall to keep pushing myself, reaching new goals and keeping my body moving. I've been moving more consistently and set a goal for myself to increase my strength training from two times a week to three times a week. I have felt better, more like myself, more energized. I've not been in a rhythm like this since I was a college athlete and I am loving it. And hey, the studies show that. Did you know that ASIC's Move Her Mind study shows that just 15 minutes of movement can boost mood, clarity, and confidence for women? Whether it's a walk, a stretch, or a moment of stillness, movement becomes a tool to feel more grounded and more connected and more you. If you're going to move, you might as well move in shoes that make you feel amazing and are cute too. The more women move, the better they feel, more confident, less stressed, and more like them which I can definitely attest to. And yet women face significantly more barriers to exercise than men as revealed in the ASIC's Move Her Mind study. So now ASIC's is on a simple mission to get more women moving. 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And if you aren't happy with the results, you can go to BetterHelp with your match. You can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. As the largest online therapy provider in the world, BetterHelp can provide access to mental health professionals with a diverse variety of expertise. Find the one with BetterHelp. RealPod listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com slash RealPod. That's BetterHelp, Better, H-E-L-P.com slash RealPod. What you've done that I respect is you were really candid, with your life in the beginning, and you're really candid with your life now. And if that means like today I bought a Cartier watch, like I'm going to do a haul of that, right? So how have you decided to remain so candid despite knowing people might judge something like a Cartier watch haul? You know, that Cartier watch is actually the last thing I really shared because it was a gift from my husband and people had such an issue with it because he's a stay-at-home dad. So that literally went all over the internet. I could not believe it. And the only reason I talked about that watch is because I thought the story was so sweet. The reason my husband got it for me and remembering it. But do find it funny because I feel like if a woman on social media is married to a man that has a very successful career and they show themselves going shopping or showing their car or a designer item, I don't see any hate comments. But I think that there's a problem because I was able to have my husband leave his job last year. He's a stay-at-home dad. I support my entire family. My four kids was able to buy my house, you know, at 29 years old. Like so much. In March and make sure my kids are set up for the rest of their lives and give them a life that I never even dreamed of having for myself, let alone providing for them. But I think that's a huge issue is I was able to do that. And I think that's a huge issue. I was able to do it on social media and also able to do that as a woman. So true. Women will say, yes, spend his money, queen, or this is the dream life I want. Right. But the reverse of you being the breadwinner, people have something to say about it. Yep. It is. It's very rooted in sexism. Oh, it absolutely is. And I cannot believe it in 2025 that it's still going on. Like, I will still get comments like, oh, you must have come from money or this was inheritance or whatever the case may be. And I just don't know why we can't clap to women because when I was a nurse, I was starting to grow on social media and I was contracted with Cherokee uniforms. That was the scrub company I worked with for gosh, seven, eight years, I think at that point. And I'll never forget when I used to do photos in exchange for free scrubs. That was like my first social media deal was I would get free scrubs to take photos in. And I'll never forget years down the line, I was contracted with them. So on top of my three, 12 and a half hour shifts, I posted three times a week for them in scrubs on Instagram. And I made $500 a month from that. That was life-changing money for us, $500 a month. That covered our groceries. That was huge. And then I remember when I got back from maternity leave with my daughter, Stevie, during the pandemic, my social media was growing and they, I was able to go back part-time to the PICU. So instead of three, 12 and a half hour shifts a week, I only had to work two, 12 and a half hour shifts a week. That changed my life. Like I never had the opportunity to work part-time ever. And $1,500 a month when you're working as an ICU nurse is a lot of money. Like that was almost a full paycheck for me. So that was so huge for me. And I remember as a consumer of social media, I would watch people in my position, and that was what motivated me. I was also so naive. Like until that money was offered to me from Cherokee, the first $500 a month, I didn't know you can make money on social media. I remember being like, wow. So they can post photos and videos and make so much more money than I'm making as a nurse. And I remember watching like halls, one of my favorite things to watch, which is why I would share things like a purse I bought or a Cartier watch because I love as a broke as fuck. And now I love watching that stuff because I'm like, period, like get it, go shopping, get your bad girl. Because I was never a hater. I would never watch people in my position and be like, fuck that girl. She's so unrelatable. She's a selfish bitch. She's changed. She's a diva. I would be like, oh damn, if she can do it, so can I. And that was when I promised myself I'm going to post every single day. I'm going to post a TikTok every single day. Even if I'm working a 12 and a half hour day, I would pre-film like three to five videos on my days off and be able to post them on my lunch break. And that was when I really started to grow. And those people that I watched, like some of them are my friends now. And I thank them all the time. I'm like, thank you for motivating me. I truly think there is a place for everybody on social media and the people that gatekeep. It's very strange to me. I think if someone else is successful on social media, I'm going to be able to do it. I'm going to be able to do it. I'm going that does not mean that you're going to be less successful. I think there's room for everyone to grow. And I truly think it's a business. And I think everyone has the opportunity to take that and run with it and be consistent and make that fucking bag. But if they don't want to do it and don't have that motivation and have a different mindset than what I have, they're the ones that are bothered by the content that they see. They're the ones leaving hate comments. So I think it just was, damn, if she can do it, so can I. And I'm going to start posting. And now here I am. Congratulations. Actually incredible. And I feel like it's so upsettingly underrated, like your path. When people refer to being a content creator as hard work, I think it really bothers people. And I am not going to fight that. I think there's harder jobs and hard work can be a not necessarily hard, right? Anyone can show up and be consistent, but not everyone chooses to have that discipline. And so I think people like to berate social media because teachers should be paid more. Nurses should be paid more, right? There's so many important jobs out there that deserve more pay. Yeah. My dad was my high school math teacher and my mom was a second grade teacher for 42 years. I was a PICU nurse and my husband was a cop. I will never in my life call my job hard. Something to compare it to. And I think a lot of people that do content creation don't have a career to compare it to. And by all means, I think everyone in social media that's successful works very hard. Is our job physically hard? No. I think that my job as a nurse was physically exhausting. Like I worked up until five days before my C-section with my I was fucking tired. But nursing also has a mental load, especially working in peds. The things that I saw are unthinkable. It's not stuff that you see in the news. It's stories that I will carry with me until I take my last breath. Those are things that I'll never forget. But I think social media is what really triggered a hard time with my mental health. Because when you read so many stories about yourself or you're told every day to kill yourself or that people want to murder your kids or leak what rooms your kids sleep in in your house because they want to harm them, that's when it really started to affect me. And I was able to get in therapy and get on medication for anxiety. But I will never say that my job is physically hard. I was able to create a boundary for myself by not reading comments, not scrolling on my For You page, and not reading my is what I started earlier this year. And that really changed my life mentally. Because I also started to realize social media is one of those things where you're damned if you do, damned if you don't. I almost started to read hate comments like constructive criticism and change what I was doing. And then I realized, oh, they're still going to be mad. So that's kind of the boundary that I had to set for myself because I mentally did not feel okay. And it was getting to a scary When you see like rumors spread about you, your family, your friends. that are just so not true, but they're going so viral. Yeah. I mean, have you just gotten to a place where you just like kind of dissociate and look the other way? Yeah, because I was just talking about this with my husband because people were so shocked that I was able to get my husband to be a stay-at-home dad that all he had to have been fired. I'm like, would I have thrown him a surprise party when he had his last day of work that I worked on for two? Like, it's just, again, I just got to a point where I'm like, why am I wasting my breath when I know the truth? You know, you get to a point where you're like, I know what is in my real life. I know what occurs in my relationships. I know what I was doing during X, Y, and Z. Why am I going to waste my breath defending whatever scenario they have in their head to a person that I don't even know and that already has their mind made up? That's the other thing too. When people have such a strong opinion about you, there's no convincing them otherwise. Why am I going to try to convince someone that already has their mind made up? It's just a waste of my breath and my time. I always jokingly tell my husband, I'm like, the day that something goes wrong or I say something wrong, like, and it happens, just grab me by the shoulders and be like, this too shall pass, right? Because you see it with people all the time. A family member got me a bracelet that literally says this too shall pass. I love that. It's so true. But it's really inspiring to see you be like so strong-willed and so sure of yourself. And I know that that's probably taken a lot of therapy, a lot of time, tears, a lot of breakdowns, but I admire the hell out of you for that because the people dishing out all this online hate, like if it literally was simulated at them for one day, I just think it would change so many people's opinion on not leaving a negative comment and all of that stuff. So I just want to give you your flowers there because you are continuing to succeed, continuing to grow, continuing to flourish despite it. So it's pretty badass. As I've grown and matured and, you know, gotten stronger, you just realize like, look up from your phone, like look at what's in front of you. Like you have an incredible marriage. You have such an amazing support system. Like how could I care what a stranger has to think about me when I have my babies every day look at me and tell me how much they love me? You know, like that, that is everything to me. And it really puts things into perspective because in the beginning, it can, it resumed me. Like I would be up all, like when my husband thinks that he's going to have to call someone and, you know, maybe put me somewhere where I'm not going to harm myself. That's an issue. And you get to that place. Yeah. I got to that place earlier this year. And that was when we had to make a lot of boundaries of no more looking at comments. Like I won't even scroll my for you page. I'll scroll my following page on TikTok. But I just had, I had to separate myself. And I just got to a point where I was like, look, look at this life. Like you, you're being sucked in to so much hate and negativity and lies from people that have never even had an interaction with you. And also take a step back from how much I was posting. I think it became quite obsessive, but also obsessive out of maybe fear for not being able to support my family. You know, I think a lot of people have issues when you're a woman that supports your family, but also it's a lot of pressure to be the only income to make sure that your family and your kids are taken care of. I would get so much anxiety if I wasn't posting my three TikToks a day because I was like, I'm going to be irrelevant. My engagements didn't go down. Brands aren't going to work with me. I'm not going to make money. And I always thought, OK, well, I can go back to nursing. Worst case scenario. But I'm not going to make money. I had to realize you can't work this much. So I've also been able to find a much better work-life balance for myself, which has also helped my mental health a lot. And I just feel like I'm in such a happy place to be able to be so much more present with my kids. So I can tell that this is like emotional for you. Is it the pride you feel about yourself and what you've been through? Is it your family's support that they've shown you? No. I think it just, it makes me sad. Sorry. It makes me sad to think about the place I was in mentally because that affects how you are as a mom. And all I want is for my kids to have a happy mom. And I wasn't a happy mom, you know, for those months that I was struggling. And that makes me sad for them. But I'm also really proud of myself for, you know, getting the help that I needed and making sure that I had the support system around me because I too feel like I'm the best mom I can be. And again, at the end of the day, the people that have the most opinions about you are people that don't know you. But my babies know me and my husband knows me and the people in my life know me. And that's what fills my cup. That's what fuels me. And that's what keeps me going because for a long time, I didn't think I was going to be able to keep going. Not just on social media, but in life, you know. And I also, I think it makes me really sad to think about the place I was in mentally that it made me contemplate leaving my kids without a mom, you know. And that makes me really sad that I was in that place because they don't deserve that. From what I can see, but I can see you're the most incredible mother and your kids love you so much from the meticulous, detailed lunches you make them, the cute custom backpacks. Like, well, even so, like, you know, that's fun and stuff for social media. But that really does, like, that's something that I really look forward to doing for my kids because, you know, my son's turning seven in October and I'm like, I don't have a little baby anymore. And I know I'll only be able to make those after-school snacks for so long before he's like, mom, you're annoying. Stop doing that. And so that really does fill my cup. Even if I'm, if I'm doing it and showing on social media or if I'm not, it's what matters to me is like their reaction. And you're a mom, but you're also a human and what you went through and what you've overcome are only going to make you that much more adept to help your kids when they go through trials and tribulations in life. You know, what would it be if a mom, a mom was like, oh, I've never had a problem. I've never had to overcome something so deep. I've never stared life in the face and kept going. And I feel like that's going to be so inspiring for your kids and it's only going to make you a better mom. My mom says we're just people trying to raise little people. Yeah, like we're all living this life for the first time. And it's so true, you know, as mothers we're going through every day, putting one foot in front of the other, learning something new every day while also trying to raise humans. And that's very challenging. It's very challenging. It's very challenging to do because I'm also still learning, but I'll make so many mistakes and have made so many mistakes, but not a lot of people make mistakes so public. And I think that those are very hard lessons to learn. And I think, you know, a lot of people make mistakes in life, but they don't have tens of millions of people, you know, telling you to take your own life or that, you know, your kids should be taken away from you and things like that, which is why, you know, I've gone the route of not showing my life as much online and taking my kids offline, which is another thing that I found to my statement, you're damned if you do, you're damned if you don't. I would get a lot of hate about showing my kids online. And then as soon as I stopped showing them for my own personal reasons, the hate that I have received for no longer showing my kids' faces is absolutely insane. Because they want to see your kids or because they think it's, you're not allowed to change your mind. It's, well, the first comment that really made me laugh is that because we moved to California, I don't want to pay my kids. But you strike me as the mom that has investment accounts for all your kids already. My kids are richer than the majority of those people make in the comments. Let me tell you. No, I'm like, you strike me as someone who's like, my kids are going to be set up. Don't you worry. No, I am very thankful for my finance team that has helped make sure my kids will be set up for life. But also, I'm very thankful for my finance team that has helped make sure my kids will be set up for life. But also, work very hard and make sure that, you know, their college is paid for and that they're not going to have access to that money unless it's monitored. That was the first comment you saw. Yeah. Why show them at all if you're going to cover their faces? But to that, I say, I don't even have a date night babysitter. I don't have a nanny. I don't have a babysitter. Like, if Dave and I are going on a date, which is, to be honest with you, probably twice a month, like I'm calling my dad. That's who's coming to watch my kids. And to be totally honest with you, we're probably not even going on a date until after we do our full bedtime routine and they're asleep. And then my dad will come over and watch a movie while they're asleep upstairs. But they don't see that. They think I have like this full-time nanny raising my kids and that I don't want to show them because of money reasons, which is actually insane to me. But they're in my content still because that's what I'm doing all day. They are the center of my life and my world. Because again, We don't have help with the kids. Like, it's just David and I. And I feel. so lucky that I have a job that I can work from home that's remote. And I call my husband my business manager. He does all of our investment accounts. We've been starting a business for two years that hasn't been launched yet. He does all the behind the scenes of that and helps me immensely. I could never do it without him. I don't have an assistant. I don't have an editor. My only employee is Scotty, and that's solely for the podcast to help me with editing and filming the podcast. But it's just me and my husband for not only my entire business, but also our all four children. So my kids are still in my content because I try to film in real time, in real life, and be honest with that of what I'm doing. But I also think that there's a way to make sure my kids are safe. And that was my top priority. Fall is in full swing, and it is the perfect time to refresh your wardrobe with pieces that make you feel as good as they look. And luckily, Quince makes it easy to look polished, stay warm, and save big without compromising on quality. Last fall, I don't think I made too many new purchases from my closet. I was really wanting to just wear what I had had from the past seasons and not consume as much. 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He's in your content, but he's also not like fully, totally in it talking and doing all that. Was that a conscious choice by you guys? Is he just not like it as much? He's very shy. Okay. Yeah. He's a very shy person. And it's actually so funny. I love telling this story because in the beginning of me trying to grow on, like, I remember getting approved for like, to know it, but I was like, you have to start taking my pictures so I can like link my stuff. Oh, he was so embarrassed. Like if we'd be out in public, he'd be like, you're going to make me take your picture right here. Like everyone's looking. He's very shy, but now he's the person who's like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't want to take a picture right now. Like he's the one that, you know, has really evolved. I met him when I was 18 years old. I'm 30 now. So I feel so lucky that we've really grown together and also grown my business together. And I definitely would not be where I'm at if he wasn't there to support me. But as far as him being in my content, I think it just comes naturally. Like if he's in my, my morning blogs or evening blogs, obviously it's because we're home with the kids, but not a very like talk to the camera. He gets very nervous and flustered. I think it's kind of the perfect scenario where he, he likes being in the background. Social media isn't his thing. He doesn't even have a social media account. He doesn't have an Instagram, TikTok, nothing. He has zero social media. Isn't it funny how with every couple, the dynamic unfolds differently. At least I feel grateful to know so many strong, awesome, like down to earth couples. But I have a friend whose partner doesn't want to be in anything, like not even a photo. And then I have a friend who's both of them do it. And then my husband and I both pursue social media, but he's in a totally football niche. Like I don't think our followers would like overlap much. Yeah. If anything, my husband would be doing something with golf. Like he would be, but even so he gets so shy, you know? Yeah. But I love it because I feel like it's a perfect balance. Yeah. Oh, that's so great. Yeah. Lastly, I just wanted to talk to you about body image because you've been so open about this. And I didn't even know that you struggled with bulimia until you told me on your podcast. Yeah. In high school. So that was high school. Yeah. I would throw up in the shower because the water sound was so loud that my parents couldn't hear me. And how long did that go on? I would say like pretty much all of junior year, maybe a little bit into senior year, but yeah, I played volleyball. I mean, you know that because you played volleyball and I just, I was never like a naturally skinny girl. I never was. And now like I love and appreciate my body so much. I've really grown to be a body image. I've really grown to appreciate it, especially after giving birth and having kids and like watching my body change. And that took a lot of years. It wasn't all of a sudden I'm like, I love my body. And don't get me wrong. I wake up on days sometimes and I'm like, I feel fucking disgusting. I would change X, Y, and Z about myself, but that's what being a woman is. But I remember specifically, yeah, unfortunately, but I remember playing volleyball and like you were the little spandex. And I remember what really started it was I was like, I don't know, I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. I don't was in the PT room because I have two torn rotator cuffs and I was getting taped up and I was sitting down on my Spanx just like this, like, you know, when your thigh gets all widened and a kid on the football team who was actually one of my good friends of mine, he was like, damn, look at all that cellulite on the side of your leg. And I was like, what? And I, I looked down and that was the first time I ever in my entire life noticed cellulite on myself because it was pointed out to me. And I said the same thing about my nose. I got a nose job last year and I didn't even notice that I had my mom's Italian bump on my nose until a girl on my volleyball team, she was on the side of me and she was like, oh, you have kind of a big bump on your nose. And I went to the bathroom and I remember turning my head to the side and I can still see everything in the bathroom. Like you never forget those moments. And we're returning and be like, oh, wow, I do have a bump on my nose. And that was the first time it ever, ever, ever was brought to my attention. So it was always by other people. But I feel like those moments are so prevalent because you'll never forget it. Right. It like fucks you up in the head. Yeah. I feel like I'm having a visual of being in my spandex. I have all these stretch marks here. And I remember the first time I like looked down and I saw all of them. And then I was looking at the other girls while we were sitting around in like the circle to be like, does anyone else have any? No one else had any. Yeah. And I was so embarrassed. I remember I had a boyfriend at the time and he came over before I went to practice and I was in my spandex and I wanted to wrap because I don't want to see them. Yeah. How did you overcome that? Your bulimia experience to not be doing that now? Well, I actually remember watching Stay Strong, that Demi Lovato documentary. OK. And she was talking about her eating disorder. And that was when I first told my dad. I remember being in the backyard by the pool and crying. And I was like, dad, I'm making myself throw up. Like that was what made me want to tell someone was, my mom was talking to me about it. And she was like, honey, you you're first of all, you're beautiful the way you are. But also we talked about like. You can eat what you want. Just do it in moderation because I was staying up so late. I was binging so much food and then I was throwing it up. So that was a habit that I had to break. And it also was a lot of like mental talk for me in my head. And then I also that was the time that I was like, oh, I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this. And then I was like, oh, I'm going to do this. And then I was like, oh, I'm and not work out, I remember thinking, you have to exercise if you want to look a certain way. And obviously, I played volleyball. And so we were very, very active. But then I joined the YMCA gym. And I started to fall in love with weightlifting. And I feel like when you start to become active and really loving it and also watching your body grow muscle and be toned, that was really motivating for me. And so I stopped binging and purging. And then I remember, I don't even know, was I on Pinterest? I don't even remember. But I remember looking at motivation for gym girls, right? And being like, you know what? I want to be strong. I don't want to be skinny. I want to be strong. And I talked about this in my Instagram stories. Literally last night, because. I just saw those. Yeah. Because I was in Pilates. And the sweetest girl next to me when we finished class was like, girl, you are so strong. And it was so refreshing to get a compliment like that. Because I feel like as women, we're always talking about how we physically look, which is so nice. I always try to compliment people, right? But it's always about the way you look physically. And I just love that she mentioned that because I always say I don't work out to look a certain way. I work out my mental health. That has helped me immensely with my mental health. But also, my kids are busy, man. I'm 30 now. I got to work out to keep up with them. And I also just want to live as long as I can to be with them. So that's why I work out. But it was a journey. I mean, we relate a lot in that way. It's a journey. And I totally agree with you. When I went to my new gym where I'm working with a personal trainer, I'm so excited. It's changed everything about my life in the best way. He's like, I love that. And what are your goals? I'm like, to feel strong. He's like, do you have a weight goal? Should we do the body fat percentage machine? I'm like, hell no. I'm not doing that. I don't want to use any of their things. I was like, I'm literally just here to feel strong and energized in my life. They were so supportive, which I appreciated. But I can't even remember the last time I weighed myself. Me neither. We don't want to scale. I would say probably a last doctor's appointment maybe a year ago. People always ask me like, what's your height and your weight and your jean size? I'm like, why does it matter? And also, I don't know how to weigh myself. I don't know how much I weigh because quite frankly, I don't need to know. I work out based on how I feel. I love that you are that way because I think obviously as one of the kind of go-to girls on social where you're really inspiring a lot of people to hear that you're like, I don't own a scale. I don't check in on that stuff. I think it's so helpful for the girls out there because there can be a lot of toxic content. And I think about my kids. I'm not going to be the type of mom that's weighing myself. And I'm like, oh, I'm in the 150s. I need a cut some whatever, you know, and have my child hear that. I don't want that for my kids. And it's so relative. Like, I don't know what I am, but when I have to fill it out, I usually guess like 170, 165, just based on like the past. And I remember the years I was like, I need to be 120 or less or whatever it was. And I'm like, I feel great in my skin. I love myself. And I don't know my number, but it's probably closer to 200 than it is 100. And I'm like, I don't care. People always ask questions about, you know, how I'm so confident. And I think that first of all, it's all mental, right? Like, I also feel like you got to fake it till you make it sometimes. Like, there are days where I wake up and I'm like, I do not want to fucking put on a bathing suit and go outside and swim right now. Even if it's just with my family, like, you just, you have those days, especially in luteal phase. Don't even get me started. But like, no, yeah, it's actually concerning. But I just, sometimes you just got to throw on that bikini and walk outside. And then my husband's like, damn, you look so sexy. And I'm like, thank you. That's all I needed to hear. Like, yeah, but you have to tell yourself that like be your own motivator. I'll give sex advice on my podcast. And people are like, how are you so confident in the bedroom? And I'm like, girl, you got to fake it till you make it because a man does not give a fuck what your body looks like. But if you're confident in the bedroom, you're going to think you're the hottest person in the world, whether you're five foot one, a hundred pounds or six feet tall, 200 pounds. It doesn't matter. Like you just be confident. It's such an energy. Okay. Lastly, you've been so open about the surgeries and procedures you've done, which I very much appreciate in a society where many celebrities and influencers don't. So for the most up to date, what are the procedures that you've gotten done? I got lipo twice. I got lipo. After I had my son and then I got it done in 2022. To be honest with you, that is a procedure that I regret. Why? Because a, I didn't give myself enough time postpartum. I've never been the mom that bounces back. Like I hold on to every pound of postpartum weight until I stopped breastfeeding and I breastfed Stevie till she was 14 months. And then when I started weaning her was okay. I'm starting to lose a little bit of postpartum weight. And mind you, my daughter turned four in May. So she's four and a half. And I finally am like, okay, I feel like myself again. I feel confident. I feel like I'm getting strong again. Having two repeat C-sections. I'm like, I feel like my abdominal strength's finally fully back. Do you think you're done having kids? Yeah. I got a tubal ligation so I couldn't get pregnant even if I tried. But that I feel like didn't really do much because it wasn't until the last like one to two years that I really made a lifestyle change. I started to see a difference in my body. So I think I did it a little too early where they didn't get a lot out of my like stomach and flank area that it more so just left me with scars and nothing else. Like people love to say, hold that against me by the way, when I say like, Pilates has changed my life, eating a more balanced diet. And they're always like, but you did lipo. That's correct. You know, three years ago, but it wasn't until I changed the way I ate and I consistently worked out that I really saw a difference in my body because you can get all the lipo you want, but if you're eating like shit and you're not healthy, all that weight's going to come right back. Like it's, it's not gonna be very beneficial. So I do regret getting that done. Other procedures, I got implants and a lift in my boobs. So before I had kids, I was naturally a 34 double D. So I was always very busty. And so I breastfed my kids for a long time and girl, I had two socks. I could have tied those babies in a knot. I feel like literally that is already what I have, but I refuse to wear bras. Like I literally hate wearing a bra. And so I have all these stretch marks on my boobs. I think when I'm done having kids too, I might want to get a little boob something. You hear about the changes in your boobs, but then like when you see the vast difference in your boobs, you're like, I did not want to lift by the way, because I was so scared of the scar. And so I did my consult and I thought I was just going to get an implant. And I actually technically have smaller boobs now than I did pre-baby. My surgeon, she was like, I love you, but you're going to need a lift. They put the implant in and then lifted it up. And now I literally never wear a bra because I got a lift. So, but they just sit so natural, which I'm so grateful for. And that's the biggest compliment I get when people are like, are your boobs real? I'm like, thank you. Thank you for asking. And then I'm like, no, they're not. And then my other procedure is my nose job. So I got a nose job in November of 2024. I told you when I was in high school, that girl had mentioned to me the bump on my nose. I also think when you're online, I do all my own editing. So like, I'm just constantly looking at my own face, which is extremely unhealthy. And then when I started the podcast, I realized I'm always to the side. It like really weighed on me. So I was like, okay, I think it's time. And by the way, all these procedures I'm talking about, I paid for all this in full. Like people are going to think I'm working with these surgeons. I'm not, you can't do that. Like it's, I wouldn't want my body permanently changed for free. You got to pay to get it done right the first time. So I found my surgeon, his name's Dr. Starkman also in he's incredible. And my, the tip of my nose kind of drooped down a little bit and it stuck out quite far. And so he shortened it and lifted the tip a little bit and then shaved, but he said it won't actually be what it will settle for the rest of my life for at least two years. So I have this little scar right here. It's the size of a cat scratch. It's literally tiny. It was the easiest recovery. And again, with the timing of why I wanted to do it. So 2026, we didn't have a wedding. We got married. We were so broke. We got married in a courthouse for $75. So when we got married, we always said, I'm going to get married. I'm going to get married. We're going to do a vow renewal. So our 10 year wedding anniversary is June of 2026. So we're going to do a vow renewal. Oh my God. That's going to be so beautiful. So I was like, I really want a nose job for that because I know there's going to be so many pictures and videos. It was just something I always wanted to do. And again, like it's the center of my face and I've always been really, really open about every procedure I've ever gotten done. And I think, I think it's important to do because social media is just full of so many unrealistic expectations. Like all these goals, they've all gotten an immense amount of work done or medication to look a certain way. They're just not talking about it. but like it gets me a lot of hate. Trust me, it gets me a lot of hate when I talk about work I've had done, but I'd rather be honest and hated for who I am than love for who I'm not. Thank you for being so honest about it because it's like anything a woman needs to do to feel her best self. We live in a society that's constantly telling us we're not good enough. So like I empathize if someone wants to do something, just be transparent about it. And so thank you for setting that example. And if I ever start to get Botox, which I think I will one day, I can't say for sure, but I definitely am going to be really open and bring everyone along to anything I decide to do. So thank you for setting that example. Oh, I appreciate it. I also had a really bad lip filler blindness, so I dissolved all of my filler on my face. Well, your lips look great. They're very overlined. But yeah, I love that I've had so many women message me like, you encouraged me to dissolve my lips or finally get a boob lift after I was on breastfeeding and or get my nose drawn that I've always wanted to do. Like, I love that, but I also love telling people they're so beautiful the way that they are. And I never thought I was ugly or that I needed to get it done. It just were small things that were weighing on me. And my husband always says, it's the nose I fell in love with. But he always says that was one of the best decisions you've ever made because the confidence that it has been brought out of you since you got a nose job, like I constantly talk about, I'm like, I'm so glad that I got this. I'm so glad that I got that done because it really has changed my confidence. I have no regrets being honest about things I've gotten done. Oh my gosh, your husband's such a sweetie. He said the perfect thing before and said the perfect thing after. No, he really, everyone that meets David is like, he is the best husband, person, dad in the world. Like, I feel so grateful every day. Like, he is the best, the best dad. And like, truly my other half, I feel very grateful. I love that. And it's awesome how you guys have been together for a decade and so much time together. It's through so much change and kept such a strong relationship. And I think there's such a huge testament to that because it's not easy, especially with life changes. Yeah. I also think that's another thing of like, look up from your phone and like, remember your foundation and where you came from. And like, he's been my foundation since I was 18, you know, it's very easy to get sucked into this, this environment and this world of social media and the public eye that you see shiny, objects and you kind of forget what matters. And at the end of the day, it's not social media. Even though I'm so grateful for the life it's given me and being able to provide for my family. At the end of the day, my family will always trump that. So I think it's such a healthy perspective for anyone out there. You have the two, three people you can count on your finger that will be there for you no matter what happens, no matter what the news headline is or what happens at your job. So I love that perspective. It's a good reminder for everyone. Avery, thank you so much. Thank you for coming on. I'm sorry I cried. Sorry I cried. Don't cry. Are you kidding? I'm really sorry. I'm embarrassed. I love that you cried and felt safe and vulnerable. And I think that's why our RealPod audience is so special. We foster these conversations. So thank you. Cheers, by the way. That was fun. Of course, guys, go listen to Cheers and complete the swap. Thank you so much for listening to this episode of RealPod. If this hit home or helped you in some way, send it to a friend, a teammate, roomie, share the love, share the realness. New episodes of RealPod come out every single Wednesday. So make sure you are subscribed to this podcast so you never miss an episode. To leave a rating or review of the show, head to iTunes and let me know what you think. I love hearing from you. Not to mention, you can stay connected with RealPod throughout the week, seeing behind the scenes info and sneak previews of upcoming guests by following the at RealPod account on Instagram. All information about today's show and guests will be linked in the description below. Thanks again for listening. I love you guys so, so much. Let's go dominate the day. And as always, keep it real. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode. Hey, this is Sammy Clark. And this is Sammy Clark. I'm your host, Sammy Spalter. We are best friends, co-founders of our wellness platform, Form, and now hopefully your new favorite podcast host with our new podcast, Transform. We started Transform because we are constantly having all of these big live chats. So we thought it was time to bring the conversations to the mic for you to join in, knowing we can all relate to the forming the best version of ourselves. We will be chatting it up from everything from self-love, health and wellness, relationships, owning a business, and all of that. The other hills and valleys that is this big, beautiful life. Tune in every week, wherever you listen to your podcasts. See you soon.