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got Tim Wilson with us in Kerry Woodham. Tell you who's sorted in at the last minute, is old Kesar and she said to me as she walked in she goes, I'm not late. Well I'm not. No technically. Where were you though? I was just honestly. I was changing my outfit. Why? Because I spent foundation all down the cashmere and mercifully because I looked like a snail. I had done an MCGa yesterday and had a range of outfits and normal people would unpack their car when they got home. I did not. But lucky for you you still have another dress in this and you've come in dressed in your evening wear. Not evening, it was an afternoon. Oh I can't see. Okay, at least. Can we just stop this? I feel very isolated in the line because you guys are just speaking some kind of female language. And by the way, together. What are the loads of them? Yeah. Either. Either. I will back the truck up. You rugby men don't talk. What an absolute load of stinking, blinking rubbish. What about your artisaviors, your boat and barretts, your John Kerwin's, your David Kirks or two words, Dane Coles? That bloke could talk underwater. Wash your mouth out. Point out point out. Well, I never heard of that. Okay, so what are you a rugby boy? Because that's a surprise to me. You don't look like a rugby boy. Are you kidding? Mine is a boy. I'll tell you what, I was in the office today with not today, sorry, early this week with two of the younger team, early 30s, early 20s, hit the deck, give me as many press ups as you got. How did you do? How did you do? We're not doing the mic. No, it's going old boomer thing again. No, this is the end of the year. He's all about going to school. He's shooting off and show how ripped you are. Do you have muscles? I'm not going to do that. Please don't. I've got some muscles. Yeah, honestly, that chat about her. How many press ups can you? How many moles did you do? I always love her. Oh, this is, this is, but this is, here's the deal. He said, this is, I said, oh, was that cashmere? Oh, what happened? He's still found it. It's the same thing. Is anyone else? I was including you in the conversation. To be fair, it was an explanation. You were adamant. And my cosking would be able to talk cashmere to LeCasca. He quite would and he would sympathise with you. And he would have the perfect. He'd have a bottle of oil to get the foundation out. And he would sympathise about how hard that foundation is can it be to get out? Who even are you to me? Yeah, Tim, honestly. Kerry, would you sack the instunks? Do you know what? I have a little bit of sympathy for him because as far as I'm concerned, if you win, you know, win as a grinning. When is you can drink until you like? Pretty much. If he doesn't, I'm old school honest. But when, because of their appalling ashes display, I watched all of those games over somewhere. It was appalling, absolutely appalling. So I think there's a lingering hangover if you will. Oh, tight. But when I was matrede of Paradeeson Wellington, Antigeluvian times, the black caps lost with a day and a half to spare against Pakistan. Yeah. Oh, here we go, Tim. Here's a yarn. Here we go. Yeah, man. Oh, well, I'm just pulling up my arms here. Yeah. They just call me Barry Sober. They had been in the Paradeeson back bar having a high old time of it, you know, kicking up their heels and then lost with a day and a half to spare. So I said to Ian Spith, when he came in, they're not welcome here. You play up fine, but you get up, you know, you get up and you perform. And he must have told them because a couple of them tried to come in. I'm like, I'm sure he's told you, you are not welcome here. Go somewhere. So you had to be their mum. Poppa. Well, I was just appalled. I was appalled. So you were the mum of our cricket team. No, I wasn't there. I was the police woman saying go back to your room and have a look at how real cricket is played. Yeah. And let's have a, you know, watch some old videos of how real cricket is played and emulate that because you do not lose with a day and a half to spare. And show your face around. And then go out and look. The problem. What was the security guard? It was a security guard. What was the security guard doing? He's a bit like a water bottle on the lawn to stop the dogs. Yeah. I mean, what is he there for? I think he's more of a shaperone, really, and sort of like so shaperone. Yeah, well, he did. He took the punch in the face for them, didn't he? Well, Ben Stokes had been out in a stratosphere for 19 stone. Some were men. Some were men, didn't he? I reckon the problem here actually, Tim, what makes it worse is that five players go home and the captain stays out. That's why he's in trouble. But they won at least. Yeah, yeah. You know, that's not an option. That's the thing. I mean, I don't know. I've given them a bit, but they were the rules and the men. I did think that that boss from England cricket saying, well, it's like a punch in the face. That was an apt and numbering of those. Well, isn't that? All right, we'll take a break. I thought it was quite, yeah, yeah, go on. Yeah, go take a break. Yeah, thank you. Nice to have Keza in the studio for this. And while we're away, I'll tell you what, do this for me, Tim. Put the phone down. See as many pre-- do as many pre-subs as you can and then report back on the number. Oh, yeah. No report back on the number. Oh, it's asking Tim. And go. Right, Tim, how many? 72. No, I didn't want to. What if? 74. 75. Follow that. 76. 77. I think 78. 79. OK, I don't care. I don't care. I think there's a text meant for you, Heather. What does it say? Says, "Keri, please don't make comment about Super Rugby." Oh, yeah. You have stated previously. Don't follow Super Rugby. I have been to every Blues game. Thank you very much. Now, are you going to every Blues game because you're being invited into a corporate box? I've also paid. You have paid. It's a mixture of both. What, why are you going to every Blues game? Because I support. I like rugby. I do enjoy rugby. And I sang as I love here. I thought it was supported. I was asked along by some members of the Blues owners, I suppose. Yeah. And I thought, I'm going to pin my colours to the Master. I had to choose between the Chiefs or the Blues. OK, and so you're very excited then, are you about them being the lucky loser in the semi-finals? Excited? No, because I've been frustrated by them. Yeah. And last week, you saw the potential of what they could have done four weeks ago. Yeah. I see a really good team next year. OK, I'll do you. I don't know if I should get your opinion on this because we know that you're not sporty. But what do you think? Actually, actually, I was just talking about muscles. Can we go back to the muscle? Oh, yeah. So. I had an exchange with the Philistines recently. I was like, "Guys, guys, you've got to work your brain. Your brain is the biggest muscle you've got." And they're like, "No, it's not dead." Well, what is it? They're like, "Your butt." Eglutious. Yeah, your butt. It is. Again, well-be. OK, listen, on the FIFA. So I said earlier that what we need to do is we need to support South Africa because they're the underdog and we love that. But also because, you know, like, we've got a little bit of immigration going on from South Africa, kind of, a show of people. But somebody said there's nothing worse than a happy Yapi, too. Oh. And a sad Yapi is quite funny. So we need to support Mixed Manchester. Can I raise my hand to your hand? No, it's me. Say that my beautiful intelligent award-winning producer, Helen. Yes. She and I were up there and I said, "Oh, gosh. What's the score? One nil to Mexico. Oh, what a surprise. It's a home game." Oh, well, I suppose we suspend our knowledge of the corruption for the entire 35 days. And she said, "She said, is FIFA corrupt?" [LAUGHTER] Oh, how we love. Oh, this is an intelligent woman. Oh, Helen. And I said, darling, they have invented new ways to be corrupt. You know, that the rest of the world follows. I think the UN was based on FIFA. Yeah, I think that's not corrupt. It's not even a breach of the law. You're not even defaming them to say that they are corrupt. They are utterly corrupt. Yeah, totally. And have been corrupt since Uruguayan Mussolini and then you just suspend your knowledge of that. And you enjoy the football. You enjoy the football and you go hootsway. Yeah, and you hope that Mexico did actually get their goal. Yes. Yes. Is that an alternative-- is that an alternative sort of sporting competition the corruption Olympics? You got FIFA in one corner. They have the new ones. Yeah, the new ones. The new ones. The new ones. I tell you what I thought was really interesting this week, Kerry, I was talking to Simon Gold about the Uber Eats. And he said to me, "Oh, that was a good chat. Good chat." I do enjoy that. I really enjoyed it. Yeah, I really did. Because he made me feel bad about not always grating my own cheese. And sometimes-- A pumpkin is hard, I like to cut up. And so you go, oh, it's going to satisfy. Is it though? Oh, yeah, when you get that good thwok on the back side. Do you sometimes, though, hack your knife? What about when you buy the whole pumpkin and you take it outside and chuck it on the drive? Oh, no, I've never done that. I've never done that. What? That's a kind of a brutalist, as opposed to finesse. That may in fact help me with my problems. Because what I do is I go to the whole pumpkin and I'm chopping it. I'm lifting the knife up with the whole pumpkin attached to it and then thwokking it down. No. No. Get better to get it out on the drive and give it a chuck. But why does those keep you doing it? It's like-- Yeah, like he would have met a symbol through his-- Yeah, like one of those ones straight up straight down from the head. But you know who's going to clean up all the orange bits on the White House, eh? That's going to be a nightmare, isn't it? OK, listen, would you get Chachy Pt. to buy you some stuff? Like, if you like, I need some new sneakers, would you trust it? No, no, I wouldn't. Why not? Because-- By the way, who buys your stuff? Because sometimes you look-- it's interesting. Actually, you know what? My beloved just bought me a lovely black jersey this week. But does she decide-- See, a ensemble background to the cashmere, don't we? Yeah, look here, you are. You're talking about it. Does she decide you're ensemble, Tim? Or do you go with all the beautiful pieces she's put in? You just mash them together. I'll sort her out until you go. No, no, no, those colors don't work. And I'll go, yeah, you're right. There is a simple back. No, do you know what buried us? And the Scroons McGee is out. beary thinks, beary loves a calacombo. Yeah. So he will just go green shirt, green pants, green socks, green jackets. But there's shades of green. He doesn't look like he's in camouflage. No, it's not all the same. It's not like a one piece, but sometimes they're contrasting. And it's quite like a lot for the eye. And I just think it'd be simple. Just put on some jeans to you. You're in your seventies. Jeans, white t-shirt jacket, the end. And what are you wearing today, Heather? You should be here. You know what I mean? It applies from when you're in your twenties. Because I'm not. No, I'm not at all. Hey guys, thank you. Enjoy your week in Kerry looking forward to your show. 10 Wilson, Kerry Woodham.