Andrews Birthday & Greyhound Nightmares

-Wave. -Hey, welcome to "Bad Friends." -Welcome to our program. -The "Bad Friends" show. -Yes. -A wave series. -A wave series? -For sure. -You two are "Bad Friends." -You are these two idiots. -Woo. -I do. -And, as you do. -You two are disgusting. -Woo. -Are you two or something? -The "Bad Friends." -We worked so hard on the set, did we not? -Oh, yeah. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. -The set, like, three meetings. -We had three meetings about the set. You know, you're Irish, right? You're Argentinian? -You have to show up. -Is this Argentinian? -It's the city of Chicago. You got the Phoenix Suns. -Yup. -And you got the Chicago daredevils, dude. No, the Paris. [ Laughter ] -Good football game. Refrigerator Perry. -Yeah, William. -Exactly. I love it. So, happy birthday to my friend, Anders Dantino. Everybody want a beautiful occasion. He's alive, another year, and that's a gift to the world. You know, it's a gift to everybody. When I found out, it was his birthday, a heart fluttered. -Futtered. -My heart fluttered. Of joy, dude, because you're my friend. I want you to have the biggest joy. And guess what? Here at the Pat Friends program, we have gifts for you, friend. -Thank you. -Would you like to see them? -I'd love to. -Let's sing a happy birthday to my friend, Anders Dantino. Please, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday. Energy. Happy birthday, dear Andrew. Happy birthday to you. How you doing? Everyone good? Everyone good. -And everybody good. -So, would you like to see your first gift, friend? -Sure. Yeah, let's crack it open. -All right. -We'll be here for you. -Who's we? Now, would you say we, you mean the boys got it? -We is we, right? With three other people behind me, right? So, yes, I'm in direct line of the weed, dude. -Okay. -All right. -All right. -You're going to love these, dude. Your legs have been burning. -Wow. -Yeah, your legs have been burning. -My legs have been burning. -These are great. -Wow. -Compression sleeves. I love these. -Do you have some? -Yeah, I do. -Oh. -Now, I have two. -Okay. -Thank you so much. This is amazing. -But the next gift is-- -This is very, very nice. -It's a very thoughtful, man. -Thanks, man. I know you asked my wife about this. -Mm-hmm. -Yeah. -No, for sure. -But this next one-- -Because I mentioned it a month ago. -This next one. -I want those legs. -Yeah. -You don't have another pair. -We gave one to my cousin. -Oh. -I gave mine to my cousin. He liked him a lot. He needed him. -I gave it to one to all 28 first cousins. -Really? -Yeah. -The whole family. -This is very nice. Thank you for this. -Anyway, so here's the second one. This one's a little difficult to-- I had to do an opening. -And I will be honest. I'm glad they didn't-- -I have to wrap them. -I don't need wrapping. -I think wrapping paper is bullshit. -I knew this about you. -You don't want to go-- -I don't like that. -Just give it to me. -I'm just opening it up. Sometimes there's five layers. Are they going to read a card? -I don't need that. -My card comes from my mind. -Oh. -Have a birthday. -Thank you so much. -I can hear your card right now. -I just said it. -Oh. -Yeah, yeah. -Happy birthday. -Thank you. -The next one is very special because-- -No slow burn with this guy. I just knock it all out. [laughter] -It's just like on Christmas, you know? When your parents are like slow down. -Slow down. -I'm excited. -I love it. -No, I think-- -Why can't I be excited for you? -I love it. I said I'm loving it. -Damn it, dude. -Anyway, so-- -There's things in life that you can call your own. [laughter] -Am I right? -Yeah. -It's a pretty big statement. -You can call your own. -So for me, it's like, you know, I have certain things, like, of my favorite pair of t-shirts. -You love your certain t-shirts. -Right, right, and-- -Lou Reed. -Lou Reed, I call it my own, right? -It is. -And there's something that you have on your own. And I'd like to share it with you. -Happy birthday, dude. -The lava. Now listen. [laughter] What we got here, dude. You're gonna love this. [laughter] -And I want to say to the people fans right now. -Thank you for opening that for me. -You're welcome. Thank you. -So the fans out there, I would like to tell you, right? This, from the lava, Eucalyptus 20, is Andrew Santino's smell. Now, if you're out there, you go to the ball. You think you can walk by a lava and get a Eucalyptus 20 to smell like your favorite star, Andrew Santino. -We all do. -This is-- yeah, we all have them. And we're always trying it. You know what I mean? And we love it in family. -We just like Andrew. -So Eucalyptus 20, don't get it. This is Andrew Sant, happy birthday. Here you go, pal. [laughter] -Happy birthday. [applause] There you go. [laughter] -I'm so happy that I made you buy mine in Atlanta for me. -I know. -That made me happy. -I know, because you have to understand, right? A year ago, when you said, right, I have a combination of smells. Right? I'm not gonna tell you what they are. So then I went to every lava in LA. -I really did. -I know. -And I go, "Do you know how to understand it?" No, we don't. Okay, bye, you know what I mean? And even with the one that I went to that knew you, they go, "We can't give that out information out." -I love that. -Yeah. But then you made the fullest decision to get yours refilled with me in the car, right? So we go to full lava, right? Like a fool, right? -Yeah, you fool. -I thought I could trust you. -Yeah, you didn't know. I thought you were looking for your own set. -Just trust me, baby. -I'm gonna reveal all of it. -How did I not know when we went to the mall and the lava was there and he wanted to go there? And I knew the whole time he was listening. -Yes. -To me speak to them. -Exactly. -Very smart. -I'm bright. -I'm one of the smartest guys I know. -Yeah. So anyway, do not wear that set. -I wear it because I like it. -Tam Segura gave me a different set. I might switch. He gave me one as a wrap gift. -Did he really? -Yeah, I might switch. -What was it? -Can't tell you. -I'll call him. -Don't call him. -Yeah, I'll call him. -I'm gonna find out every smell, smear, lotion. -Don't find out my smear. -That's protect. -What kind of smear do you use on your bagels? -I'm not telling you. -All right. I'm doing a macaroni cheese one that's popping bagels. Was it pop-up bagels? -Papa bagels. -Oh, yeah, pop-up bagels. I had soul food yesterday. -I have two numbers by him. Let's see what the. -Oh, they're both. Oh, give his number away on the show. Tell his number, everybody should have Tom. -I'll just try the first one and see if this works. -I'm sorry. -Nope. -What up, dog? -Hey, Tom. -Hey, Bob. -You're on Pat Friends right now. -Don't do it, Tom. Tom, don't do it. -Tom. -Yeah? -Are we friends? -Are we friends? -Yeah. -What kind of question is that? -Well, you sent me really angry videos. -What are you talking about? When did I send you an angry video? -You sent me a video. I guess you're an Asian restaurant and you asked the Chinese waitress. Do you know who Bobby Lee was? Do you know who Bobby Lee is? And then you sent me that. -That's not accurate. What I had. I had a Korean driver and I said, "Do you know who Bobby Lee is?" She goes, "What? Who?" And I was like, "Bobby Lee." And she was like, "No." And I go, "Do you know anything that's Korean people?" And she goes, "I know every Korean person." -It was something like that. Anyway, you owe me because of that. So, what was the gift that you give Andrew a smell? -Don't do it, Tom. -Yeah. -What. Was it? -Yes. -It was a lithium by Rocha. -A lithium by Rocha? Thank you so much. I love you. I love you. -Wait, is that bad? -No, it's good. A lithium by Rocha. -Thanks, Tom. -I'll make you Tom. Bye. Bye, Tom. -Why are you hanging out? -I love you, man. Good movies, man. I'll talk to you later, okay? -I'll talk to you later. -I'll talk to you later, okay? -It's a lithium, huh? -What was that? -What was that? -What was that? -It's the best part about Bobbi's. -That was Rocha. -It's never going to remember it. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're going to memorize it for me. Alicia by Rocha. I'm going to get that, too. -We'll put the links. -Put the links in the video, dude. If you want to smell like Santino, do a combination. But you can lift this 20 and you'll lift Alicia's pipe, Rocha. -All right. -Get it, dude. -I don't need to happen. -Thank you so much, McCone. Thank you, man. I'm going to make a wish. Can I make a wish on the show? I want to make a little bird. -I'm not going to pretend when you do the blow. I'm not going to pretend I'm dying. -No. -That's a bit I used to do and I'm not going to do it again. -We brought one for Bob, so he's not left out. -Okay, good, thank you. -Because we knew he'd be mad if he was left out. -That's not a fucking true, dude. -It's my birth. -It's his birthday, dude. What the fuck are you talking about? [laughter] -You did the reverse. -All right. -You reversed it. -I'll make a wish right now. -Yeah. -It didn't work. -No. -Yeah, what was it? -You guys would not be here. -I know. -Can you take this away? -Thank you very much. -Thank you, McCone. -I'm McCone, very nice of you. -Yeah. -Where's the tiramisu from? -John and Vinnie's. -It's my favorite. -Oh, it's not Lil Don's. -That's seriously? -Yeah. -You know, it's so funny. -During my birthday, you go to Ralph. -Yeah. -You value those cakes. -You like those cakes. -That's what you give people when they are. -Those are value cakes. -It says right on it, great value cake. -Yeah. -499 cake. -Great value. -Yeah, yeah. -You want a fancy restaurant for him? -No, it's Lil Don's. -It's nice. -I mean, it's kind of like a regular Italian restaurant. -Yeah, can I go to an actual restaurant? They they go to fucking Ralph's and they go to CVS to get my shit man. Yeah, it's on postmates. It's just easier. Okay Anyway, happy birthday. Thank you so much. Yeah, what a beautiful cake. Thank you so much. Yeah, so um, what'd you do? I just got back from Atlanta today So um, how was the filming experience? It was wonderful. I had a great time. I hope the movie is good I told people really like it. They're gonna John Stamos was Incredible. That's a great guy. My boss Ralph Macho. Amazing. Tom Segero Tim Simons with Ralph Macho's in the movie. St. Quay walls Yeah, Ralph plays my my boss Ralph Macho does plays my boss. He texted me as I congrats on the rap Wish I could be there. He's the nicest one of the nicest dudes I've ever met him Daniel son Yeah, I know Daniel son done. Okay, okay. All right. It wasn't a competition to see who knew him I'm just saying it dude. It was awesome. That's great. We had a great time. We had a nice little Little rap get together because the rap party is happening right now as we speak and I had to be back here for My little prince. Yeah, so I had to come home. Well, I heard it's good I heard it was a good experiment. Shut up. I didn't hear shit. Of course. Let me try Can I try? You can try. I heard it was a great film. What did you hear? It was really good about it chemistry between yeah and adlibs Connections yes, Annie. I like it. You get in the wide you punch in You get all the improv in the wide and you fucking punch in dude. You actually get the improv when you punch in now I'm not on the wide dude. Both why would you have it in the wide? You're never gonna use it. It's just a set-up shot I know but sometimes you that's why in a wide you experiment because they're not gonna use it So you experiment with it, especially when you do the whole scene. Dude, can I have my own technique dude? Well, question my technique. That's my technique. It's working so well. Yes, you're right. Oh, you know what dude? Okay. Yeah. I'm not as you know Complex and you know, I mean I'm not as good of an actor as you complex. All right. I'm not as good as an actor as you are You're trying to dog me down dude, and I like when you dog me down dude weren't you just dogging me just there? What just now you were dogging me I said you had a great experience. It was a lie. It wasn't you don't know that I heard it from Ralph. Oh, okay wax Oh, it's off dude as long as he waxed on it. No, I Assume it's good. It was incredible. You didn't complain. You were like very happy about it No, dude, but it was the hardest movie I've ever shot we shot it in fucking 20 days is literally impossible It's like a 30-day movie we shot in 20 want you were in every scene, right? Pretty much. Yeah, we have to be in almost every scene. I mean all of us. It's like us. It's just following us It'd be like it'd be like to hang over. It's like nobody got a day off You're in every scene. You know what the best is when they go you're not in this next scene Feel so good and then you go I'm gonna take a nap. Yeah, I'm gonna go back to the trailer. Yeah, it's the best one of my favorite things We got almost none of that we were outside a lot. We had some great scenes. We shot at a I guess I shouldn't give anything. I don't want to give anything away. We shot at some really cool locations At a great time. I Lano treated me very well except for the roadways Mm-hmm. I don't even know who designed it He was he was closing his eyes when he drew the the map of how to get around Four highways will converge into one and split up. I got lost seven times. Bro Did you see that video of that tiger being more that tiger mulling that guy but see what I don't what I don't understand is They only show the video where he goes in there, but I think they stopped him. He did he die. He died. Oh, he did you got molded out? Yeah. Oh my god Do you see that dude? Yeah, it jumped into an enclosed that the most all-time. That's my biggest nightmare Well, why don't you jump in there? Why would you jump in there though? It's called land of the tigers. Was he hammered? I think that was a rumor. Do you think so? Yeah, okay. Yeah, I'll tell you you want to see a guy live Yeah, do Tesla crashes as a 170 miles an hour a guy blew a tire on a Tesla on the on the Autobahn in Germany And he dude he he's there's footage inside the car and the tire pops and he fucking lives When you see the crash I gotta see it. This is it a full screen this thing When you have a great designer. I mean look at how fast he's going 285 kilometers and watch right here pops their pop Oh fuck he lives look at the car. They'll show you the car And he lives that's what the car was in shattered pieces Whoa he's alive That's why Elon's gonna be our next president How insane is that that's crazy 285 kilometers and it pops right There look at the red on the screen. Oh, my car went fuck my god. Have you ever had one of those on the freeway? I've spun out. I've spun out. Oh, it sucks. And not for a 177 dude on fucking mauland When it's raining dude. I did a triple eight. It's fucking you're lucky didn't I could have died. Oh my god. Yeah, yeah It's that to think that that guy didn't die is something that's insane. Okay. I think that's a good Tesla commercial One Friday night you okay, you know, um, if you go up La Siena go. Yes, sir. Right. Yeah. I'll hit sunset It there's like that little hill right like this right. Yeah So my brother and I were in my car. It was a Friday night. Okay We're driving up La Siena go and then the gas light came on Would say I ran out of gas the gas. I was already on Ah It'd been awful. It doesn't go hey It's not like a heart attack. Yeah, yeah, it was on it was on it was on me. Yeah And so Friday Friday night traffic is tough there. Yeah, it's one of the worst bumper to bumper right So it's raining. I'm stuck. I'm causing all kinds of mayhem. Okay People are like driving by me going fuck you. You're food. I know, but it was like and I'm panicking What do you mean is that he's fault? It's not his fault. It's not my fault. People run out of gas. Maybe the fucking tank bigger Make the fucking thing right. What kind of what kind of car was it? I don't remember But anyway, so then I all of a sudden I see this man running up From four cars down guy jumped out of his car ran up to my car and goes what do you need? I go? What do you mean? I'm stuck. I don't know what to do. He's like you got to get gas And it was you know what that person was Steven Fury. Oh, I love him He was wearing a comedy. He was a working the door at the time. Did you know him? Yeah. Oh, yes Here's the man and he saved my fucking life Steven Fury. Well, how many years ago was this? This is like 12 years ago But it was like wow when you're there. It's the most condensed traffic In all of like it you could be anywhere that's condensed. There's no more condensed than this The rental that I had when did I drove you and when we went to the restaurant to the Vietnamese joint That rental car that we got it That thing okay first to check engine light came on so I talk to producer I was like hey, I think I might need to switch out the rentals. He's like yeah, we'll work on it And then after I dropped you guys off the low tire pressure came on the coolant light came on It was Christmas on the fucking dash. Oh, wow, wow, wow, and I was driving to set in the morning because we couldn't we didn't switch it out because Didn't have enough time and I had a weird premonition. I was like this. I'm gonna die I'm gonna die in this fucking Kia sorento on the way to set at 4.30 in the morning and no one's gonna help me because in Atlanta I don't this I talked to you Atlanta people speak the truth. No, okay. It's insane Carbacuse they they caught the the 85 they're like oh carbacuse city man Because the car barbacuse the cars are on fire on the side of the road all the fucking time I know what's going on in Atlanta. It just happens look up Atlanta car barbacuse I every single day there was a car on the side of that either already been burnt Or just burnt down It was insane. It was like of the amount of cars burn a car No, the car led on fire like okay, there's 85 Jesus Christ look at that look at there's one on 85 Dude the amount of cars that run fire on the side of the road or just left on the side of the road in Atlanta was Mind blowing it would be like every two miles. There was a car on the side of the road. Wow. I got pulled I tell you guys got pulled over they say that on the you got pulled over oh, dude tell me I'm pulled over in years Was it one of those like Southern cops? No, it was inside It was inside where we're filming and well well well That's exactly what do we got here? You know, he pulled me over inside the grounds where we're filming and we filmed inside where I told you stranger things shot There scuba do shot there so they shoot there all the time There was another production shooting there while we were there and I get out at like two in the morning three in the morning I'm driving back to the condo And I get pulled over and it's like a park. It's a nap. It's like a We're not a not a national. What did you do wrong? No, I get I pulled over. He's like for what what are you doing here? Oh, yeah, exactly. What are you doing here? Any any flashlight in my eyes? Yeah, I was like We're doing home. Yeah, here we go. Hey man. No, no, no, here we go pop pop pop that's not what that sounds like You know it wasn't all the way I know how long they take and that was two seconds too short So I just want to go all the way with the keys are fast. Oh, they are actually not again cop all right Now what are you doing, sir? I'm just headed back home. I was filming. We're filming here inside of filming You were filming what you some sort of movie star. No, sir. I was just I'm just an actor. I was filming here You do you you think you'd like that team with each I'm are like I'm sorry. Excuse me. Excuse me. Yeah. What you doing here around here boy? We're filming a movie. I'm just going You know man my dad always said I look like Paul Newman You do as it's just a little baby man. They call you call me little poly man because I'm Paul Newman Which are and I used to make those little frozen pizzas. What's your name, sir? What is wife and him do? Yeah, what yeah? Share what's my name. Yes. My name is sheriff clearance Todd Where you can say clearance Thomas for a second. It's - Of course I, but then I realized he was a supreme court judge. - So I switched it. - Yeah, you can be in the movie. - Don't call it out, fuck face. - I'm sorry. - Anyway, what are you doing around here, man? - For the third time, sir, I'm filming a movie. I'm just trying to hang on. - Anyway, have a good day, sir. Is that what happened? - No, he was like, he was like, where are you going? I said, oh, I'm going out this gate, out this way. He goes, it's closed, buddy. I said, I know the locations told us to just move one of the cones and go out. It's because that's how we get back out. He's like, oh, they told you that? And I was like, yeah. And I thought he was going to be like, well, they're wrong. You got to go out the other way. He goes, oh, okay, I only work half day. So if they told you that, that's fine. (laughing) I was like, how easy is it for him to, he was like, go on buddy, that's fine. He pulls behind me, watches me move the cone, and then waves. I could have been up to, who fucking knows in the park? All I had to do was like, yeah, they said that. He was like, yeah, I only work half day. So that, if they said it, probably true. So he watches me pull the cone and pull it back. And then, bye bye. I would have been combative. I wouldn't have gotten trouble, I think. Well, I was in the car with my wife too. So I would have been, stop son. What's stop son? (laughing) And no, I hadn't been pulled over and so long. But, I don't know if I should say this on the air. But I was given, I was given one of those. We were, we had officers working with us on the set. You know, they're everywhere. Police officers. Yeah, okay. And I want to get the, what kind of officer is it? And you know, they have these coins. These like, sheriff's coins. I don't even know what they're called. Dude, I might even have one in my pocket. Do you have one of these? I have a coin. From a sheriff or somebody? It's from somebody. So I should, I should have brought it. It's in my travel bag. Oh, it's an AA coin. Oh, okay. Well, I have another coin hold on. So it's one of these like, like this, right? It's like a pendant. Yeah, it's an honor coin. Wow. And he gave it to me. And I was like, oh, this is awesome. Thank you so much. And it's, they're heavy. They're really nice. And they're this big. They're like bigger than silver dollar. And there's another officer. Right here, right here. Let me see. And I said, so yes, that's, that's what they are. Yes. And I don't look like this, right? That's exactly what it looks like. Yeah, yeah. And mine is in, in special recognition, yep, yep. For outstanding performance. Let me see. This is Delta Company. Check it out. Wait, it's from, it's from, he's done in performance driving. You got one. Delta Company Miko, second security for a forage assistance up brigade. So this is a, a military. Yep. Can I have that? Bingo. Give me. What do you think? Very beautiful. It's very beautiful. It's kind of like that. It looks like the one he's got up there on the left. Yeah. And I said, I go, oh, so if I get pulled over, I can flash this. And he like turns and looks at the girl. And I go, and she looks at me kind of like, you know, one of these things and I go, so if I'm speeding and she goes, well, you know, it depends on who you get. Oh, right. And I was like, so if it's like something minor that I should show it and she goes, yep, probably. Oh, wow. Oh, shit. It's like, that's so cool. Get a jail out of free coin. It was wild. And I was like, who gets these? And she's like, oh, the sheriff gives them to put certain people. Yeah. And I was like, that's fine. I tried this with this coin. Yeah. Yeah. Free to jail for bribery. That's pretty cool though. I imagine I'm going to, but it's in Georgia. I imagine I go back to Georgia. I flash it. Yeah. They throw me in prison. That's how we know. Yeah. I don't think I would risk it. No, I'm not going to. Yeah. I don't know. It was a nice little guy. How do you do it? Like, you, you, you tip of a hostess at a restaurant. Like, how do you, you literally show it to, like, do you, let me tell you. Yeah. Pull me over. Pull me over. Pull me over. Yeah. All right. Here's the coin. Here's the coin. (sighing) (laughing) (sighing) - Are you rolled up my back window? - Yes, I did. - All right, just air it out. - Yeah. - 'Cause I'm a piece of shit sheriff. - Oh. - Hey, how you doing, man? - How are you? - What's going on? - You're driving recklessly. - Was I? - Good like crazy person. - Oh, so I'm sorry. - You drunk? - No, sir, I haven't had anything to drink. - Okay. - Anyway, can I see your license and registration place? - Sure. - Oh, shoot. - Oh darn it. - God damn it, can I see that quencer? - Oh, this? Oh, I'm just gonna get you my license. - Can I see the quenches? - Oh, sure. - Yeah. - Let me look at this sucker. - Holy shit, man. - Yip, yip. - Yip, yip. - You know, I was in the Yip Company. (laughing) - I was about to let you go. - I'm already gone. 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That's acorns AC O R NS dot com slash invest in all new customers only terms apply acorns dot com slash and invest in all paid nonclined endorsement compensation provides incentive to positive promote acorns tier two compensation provided investment and results were very investing involves risk acorns advisers LLC and SEC registered investment advisor view to important disclosures at acorns dot com slash Investinal. The guy that came down to Atlanta to come see us from a cone corkery there took a Greyhound bus. I'd love to hear some stuff about the Greyhound bus. We joked about McCone not flying there and taking a bus and he literally took a bus took you four days three days. It took me four days and the furthest I got was Dallas. What do you mean the furthest you got? I literally time wise I couldn't make it. Wait a minute. You flew the rest of the way. Yeah. Yeah. He lied to you. No, no, no. I rented a car and I drove. You told me you took the bus all the way. We have a video of me telling you that I drove. It was it was the sake of the show you could have gone along with a bit but it was in the last episode. We'll call out the continuity. The BTS. This guy is a disc. We got a fire. We got to fire this. All right. Let's take a look at this video. This is at Union Station. Yeah. So before this even started. All right. That's all we need to hear about. I feel like I think. Good job. I guess that's still and that those two words really got me. I was in locked in here. I was in Philly in New York with Rick before and based on the flight. Riku Glassman. Okay. Based on the flights. I didn't have time to go home so I took because I've been taking the bus home from the airport because of you. Ubers are too expensive. Is there a way for you to condense this? Basically. I didn't even get to the meeting. I didn't have time. I didn't have time. Maybe in the whole shower. So I was hanging out at Union Station and here's the bus pulling up. That's actually a good looking bus. It's not what I thought it was going to look like. This was the nicest bus I was on. Okay. Okay. So it goes down from here. That's bad. But this first bus was pretty chill. What does it smell like? This bus was like, look at it. Look at this. It's brand new. Nice new seats. There wasn't that many people there. Did it smell that weird? No. The later one smelled really bad. Okay. I got really lucky on the first one and honestly on the first bus I was like this is better than a flight. Like I was stretched out. Everyone had the next seat open next to them. That's good. I was on my laptop. I watched Napoleon Dynamite. There wasn't many incidents on it. There was one kind of methylady that sat behind me that had a seat companion and in the middle of the night. He started screaming at him because I guess he broke her charger. Oh wow. Everybody on the bus had a broken charger. Every single day. Did yours broken? No, no. Mine was perfectly. Did you offer yours to the people? I would offer to. Did you offer yours? Because that's what I would do. You break your charger? I offer mine. Come to my seat. Come to my seat. I don't think so. I don't think I would do it. I would hoard it. I would hoard it. And they would go, is yours work? I go, no. I broke too. Everyone's broke. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't get in the middle of their fighting because she started screaming at him. She was black and on white and that's not okay. That's not okay. She's right. That's right. She was black. She was black and she was like a messy white. Oh, I thought of you as the other way around. Yeah. This is insane. This is all fucking crazy. And then, and this was the best bus. And she was smoking something that had a vapor that I had never smelled before. Yeah. She had, well, she had a little bit of tinfoil. So she, the potential that she was free-basing behind me. Math. And then I could, I had headphones on it. Carlos knows. Carlos, tell me about math. - It's definitely meth. - Yeah. (laughing) - And we now go to our resident meth expert. (laughing) - Well, 'cause then she started winging out. And even though I was still watching the movie, I could hear through my headphones. I could hear her go go and you got all these electronics up there. I see you with your electronics. You got these electronics. - To you? - I could just, well obviously it was me. - When you're lucky, you didn't get robbed. - Well, and then I pulled my phone cable out of my bed or out of my bag and it was all wrapped. And she was like, why are you folding your cords? Why are you folding the cords? - She's right, why are you folding the cords? - Well, 'cause that's the way to maintain them. - And you should have said to her lady, you know your charger wouldn't be broken if you rolled your cords. - Did you say that? - Teacher of lesson. - I was a little scared of her. - So I went to bed and I-- - 'Cause she was a meth white? - She was just, she was in my ear. - Okay, first of all, they're all white. Meth white, meth? - Yeah. - I think that's white's choice. - No, there's a lot of blocks and Asians that smoke meth. - Asians, yeah, I guess, yeah that's true. - I guess everybody kinda smokes meth now. - Hey, great. - Everybody smokes meth now. But I did meet one, I made one friend on this bus. His name was Tony, 'cause at Phoenix, they kick you out and they clean the bus for an hour in the middle of the night. - What'd you and Tony talk about? - Well, we were talking about music for a while and we were just hanging out. - Did you get his number? - I did. - Call him up. - Would you say, "It's only what your favorite talking is album." - You have his number? - Yeah, we were texting. - How old is Tony? - There's no way to know. - Does he know who we are? - Yeah. - He knows what bad friends is? - Uh-huh. - No way. - No, he did recognize you. We were just talking, he was like, "Oh yeah, I know those guys." - Did anybody in the bus recognize you? - Oh, no, no. I don't think, Tony's white. - No. - Oh, okay, 'cause the way you said it was black. - Yeah, you did. Yeah, that was really racist. - Yeah, it was a little racist. - Do it again. - He was like, "Oh yeah, I know that guy." - That's black. - That's black, that's black. - I was like asked him where he was like, what he was traveling for. Actually, Aristotle Ataris called me on the way and we were talking, he was like, "Don't talk to anybody on the bus. Like, keep to yourself, sit towards the front." What is he, the Greyhound Whisper? - What the fuck is he, that's what he said. - Fuck this, he lived in Texas. - Like, what is he, why is he an expert on Greyhound? - He is a Greyhound in Whisper. - That I took Greyhounds all around Texas and he's like, "This is what you need to do." - Wait, he did, when he was filming something? - Well, when he was younger and he was in Texas, he was like, he was like, the bathroom stinks, so sit up to the front. Don't, everyone will ask you to buy you things. Everyone is asking for loose cigarettes. It felt like prison. Everyone's asking for loosey. - What was, yeah, a commissary? Did you guys have commissary? - Yeah, well, we would stop and it was not, but everyone would be like, "Hey, can I have some life for coffee? "You got some money for a cigarette over there?" And he's like, "Don't buy anything for anyone." - 'Cause then you'll buy everything for everyone. - Yeah, then it's like, you got to say that I'm sorry, I can't, I'm on a budget. And then he's like, "Don't talk about where you're going "or what you're doing." But I broke that word. - Meanwhile, he had nine grand on him at all times. (laughing) I'm chatting with everyone, but Tony, I asked him, he was going back, he was working a job, he was laying cement in Bakersfield, and he was going back to, he's from a small town, I believe in Tennessee, going back to see his wife and six kids. - Wow. - Wow. - It's a long ride. - He's a hard worker. - Must be, I mean Bakersfield, the Tennessee is far. - There's no cement in Tennessee. - Not anymore, not. (laughing) - What happened to the-- - The cement in Tennessee. Why do you have to go to Bakersfield, dog? - I asked him how he met his wife. - Okay, that's not, you're not going to address that. - I feel like a lot of these people have some kind of a criminal record, and it might be easier to get jobs in California. So there was a lot of people trying-- - They're on a bus to avoid a plane. - So a lot of it is maybe financial, but some of it might be they're not allowed at airports. 'Cause you don't have to have a driver's license to get on a Greyhound, right? - No. - They don't check your bags or everybody had weapons and drugs and-- - Nice. - Nobody has. - So the Greyhound is the movie we should be shooting. - Yeah, the Greyhound. - We should be shooting the Greyhound. - Yeah. - Everybody had everything on it. - The cops ever, like, there was no search, there was no dogs, no sniff, no nothing, huh? - Yeah, that's a Greyhound, dude. - Oh, that's a Greyhound, yeah. (laughing) - When I was in, when I was in Lord'sburg, when I was in Lord'sburg, New Mexico, at one point-- - That's when you called me. - Yeah, we facetimed. - One of the guys, one of the bus driver was trying to get one of the patrons arrested, but-- - How many bus drivers were on the bus, two, three? - They switched, so there are major routes. On my route, if I would've learned all the way from LA to Atlanta, there's major hubs that the buses don't, they just go back and forth between these, it would go from LA to El Paso, then El Paso to Houston, then Houston. - One ride from LA to El Paso. - The bus driver switched halfway through, and it's about like an hour long layover, no matter where you're heading, and they kick everybody out. - With the layover from LA to El Paso, what is that length? - The ride. - So I got off at Lord'sburg, I got off a little early, but normally that would probably take you around 14 hours, but every single bus I was on was delayed by at least an hour. - It's like flying down to Australia, man. - And one of them was-- - That's insane. - So far. - So did I multiple hours. Oh yeah, here's a man. We were stuck in traffic in the middle of the night, next one to semi's, and here's a semi driver. I got eating a burger. - I don't know if that's nice. - That's not cool, dude. - That's he's eating a meal. - I don't know. - No, isn't that beautiful though? - No, it's not. - It's the beauty. - It's worse than him drinking off. - Do you know what this is? Bob? - Yeah. - This is his moment of Zen. - I know. - And here's some fucking film student being like, "Look at the green, then it's so noir." - I know. - No, it is, it was like Paris, Texas lighting up. - See, you're not new. - Look at him. - You knew he was gonna stop me. - You win vendors all of a sudden. That's the fuck up. - He met his wife. - Oh yeah, how? - They were, you, wait. Could I ask you something? - Do you care? - You know what I mean? - Look at me right now. Honestly, look at me right now. You piece of shit, dude. - Do you care? - I wanna say thank you for the gifts. They mean a lot to me. - You welcomed him. - It was very fucking cool of you. - Thank you. - You're my best friend and I love you. - Thank you. - And I missed you on the move. - I missed you too, man. - A lot. - I would think about you at night. - I thought about you too at night. - And I'm, when every time I try to call you, you would hang up on me. - Exactly. - We don't need a break. - Sometimes we do. - I wanna live with you. - No, I don't wanna be with you. - All right, all right. - Really? - You're hostile. - I'm hostile. - Sometimes. - I'm hostile too. - Yeah, you're hostile behavior as well. - We both have hostility. - We do. - All right, let's see. So I just wanna say thank you. I like you. - Thank you. - Deerly. - So Tony said he's from a kind of a small town in Tennessee. - Dude, this guy's King of Trends. - Are you fucking crazy, dude? We're done with the Tony. We don't give a fuck up on him. - He's one. - Are you being real? You don't give a fuck about his wife. - He wants to tell it so bad. - All right, this story better be fucking good. - You know it. - Look out, look out. This love story better be the best love story I've ever been heard. - All right. Better than the love, the love from the love capital that was illegal to black and white lady. - Yes. - The love? - Yes, the love. - This better be better than that story. - So Tony was rolling with his crew. And then his wife was hanging out with her-- - Gang? - A biker gang? - He's just his associates. He said he was going to hang out with. - He's a gang. - And they were at a Taco Bell. They're a local spot. - That's where they hang out. - Yeah, yeah. - And then his friends started to-- - What are Chalupas? - His friends started talking shit to her friends. People pulled the guns out. - Whoa. - Everybody starts shooting. - Imagine that's how you meet your wife. - Taco Bell. - I'd love to take you out sometime. (laughing) - A Taco Bell. - She gets shot in the leg. - What? - What? - Everybody else scatters. - Yeah. - Except for Tony, because he's like, that's fucked up. Like a kid. - My brother raises an opportunity. - I know. - This is what the game was actually about, that book. - Yeah. - It's a freeing that game. Shoot someone if you really want to be with them. - So that he took a shirt off and like wrapped it around her wound. - Ternicate. - Loaded exactly. - He used a shirt as a ternicate. - Loaded her up in the car like a reservoir dog. She was like bleeding everywhere. - This is awesome. - This is awesome. - Rover to her mom's house. - Not the hospital? - You can't go to the hospital. They ask questions. - And they're criminals. - I was at a Taco Bell. I got shot in the leg. I mean, what kind of-- 'cause he had a gun. - He shot, he shot a people. - But he didn't shoot at her. - He didn't shoot at her. - He's shooting at people. It's still gonna be-- - I'm sorry, this is what you do. - Do you really think you can get into a gun fight? And then-- - I'm sorry, this is what I would do. - Yeah. - Okay, what is the problem with this, all right? - Pick a picker up. - I just did. - Yeah, I saw. - I just did it. - I know. - All right, let me do it again. - Right. - Yeah. - Walka, walka, walka, walka, walka, walka, walka. We were at emergency room. Doctor goes, what happened? - Right, but you leave, yeah. - You think, well, let me say something. You think the gun that I was using is on me? - Well, gang members drop off people all the time. In Chicago, that's what they do. They dump them at the ER. They kick them out when they're bleeding. - I'm not gonna walka with two shotguns in my bag. It was a fucking pull up, you know what I mean? - Van Damme. (laughing) I'm gonna hide all that shit. And go, I was just a patron. This young lady got shot. We don't know what happened. That's what you said. - I get it, but okay. That was not Tony's deal. - Tony is a liar too. - Well, Tony was obviously wanted by the law. And if you go to the hospital and there's like a-- - We got a call, Tony. - Call? - No, we'll call him. I'm waiting for him. - All right, let's go. - But so Tony wraps it up. You know, wraps up his wound or wraps up her wound, gets her there. And it was like, his mom was like so appreciative. Like, thank you so much and so was she. And I said, what was the moment that you knew that she was the one? And he said that. - It's like when Falkoni went to Bruce Wayne's house, remember, and got stitched up? (laughing) Same thing. - It's the same thing. - Same thing. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can you operate on this? - What if he's just retelling his story? - That's his life. - This is the Batman story, dude. - That's Batman. - She called him over and was like, hey, my mom said like the cops are coming and like, you can't be here when the cops are here. Like, I don't want that. - Right. - So you've got to get out of here. But she's like, I want you to come back. And he was like, that moment where she like had his back in that way. - This is beautiful. - That's actually a beautiful story. - This would be Tarantino. - That's a Tarantino movie, dude. - So we're now. - It's like sticking the fucking needle in the heart. - Yes. - That's who you fall in love. - That's exactly right. You saved my life. That's great. - We're in the process of trying to get him on the way. - That's fine. Don't worry about it. - But let's get through some more stuff. - So, then I stayed my first night, the ice level one night. I ended up in Lord'sburg, New Mexico. Lord's Burg New Mexico as a town of like nobody This was my little motel that I was staying in big bed Yeah, I was on a wide lens. Okay. There also was a lot of There was a lot of space. So Lord's Burg is just this little town about an hour north of Mexico border and back in the 1860s It was a big railroad hub and so that was like The first minute of the video Yeah, how do we get to minute 10 I start filming a lot less when the other buses happen because I physically couldn't this is when you called me You got chased by a dog. Yeah, oh, I got you know this is the game guy that presses my flight on the screen Oh, you're seeing the stairs of the plane just deers it to fucking get the maps and oh, I love the map Am I you know he turns to guy next to me? You know the railroad started right here. We're flying over right now right now Yeah, though can I tell you by the way on the plane I go to the bathroom today? Yeah And as I'm walking back I had to like squeeze up and over and so I'm kind of like leaning over this guy's seat a little bit and as I do it I look down he's on his phone and he is Swiping away on grinder Wow, so I struggled because you've seen it. It's all the pictures everyone's like bodies and all that stuff And I keep looking because I just wanted to see like who he was picking. I got so interested I almost want to be like hey, man, tell me because I the one of the people I worked on the movie He was like we were talking about it. He's gay and he goes grinders week. He goes you got to get there's a new one called sniffies Sniffies look this up dude. Oh, I got a sniffies. It's like but hole pictures recarlos you'd love like scratch and sniff You like that for gay community sniffies. That's it sniffies sniffies Sniff dude, he said sniffies is unreal and then he can show you it's got location It's got geo mapping it shows you what floor they're on what building they're in okay is this only for dudes it's gay guys Yeah, it's only gay. Okay. They don't have this it would be a threat for women if it was on you can say 400 feet away That'd be crazy Sniffies is only for gay men. Does it say no? Most of their pies oh, it's just women aren't allowed since women are allowed on there Another thing we're holding women back from being on gay websites Go back. That's fine. Let's go go back. So now you're through Lord'sburg. What's next? Good Lord'sburg and no, I'm just saying it was a really this is a really big town in the late 1860s But it's really it's been going down ever since I mean class Yeah, I don't want to be in class. Is there a test after Built the freeway, but this is the motel. I was staying and I memorized this I got to tell you that motel is exactly what you'd seen a horror movie I know done won the fight. That's where Timmy the McVase stayed when he was hiding remember He really was when he he stayed in a place like that anyway And every single place I saw was closed like there was only one restaurant open it was on It was like a mile away, and there was of course no ubers and no one was like walking around side I like how you act like we're supposed to be shocked that Lord'sburg didn't have ubers or active businesses Okay, so there's a dog there's the dog that chased you so yeah, so I started so I started walking back through town And I was tired of walking back between you know you hold down a tic-tac video to go to and a half speed Yeah, I want to do that right now. I know me to me too. Like just hey, can you put the words at the bottom? Okay, so what else? So can we get out of Lord'sburg? Let's get out of Lord'sburg. Let's get out. We need to get out. I'm done with Lord'sburg I don't care about the fucking did anything significant other other other other dogs chasing you in this Yeah, so I was walking to this abandoned town and then it's not from the dices of dog thing you're a bunch of dogs bark Yeah, and I turn around and then a four dogs emerge from an abandoned building are they chasing you? Yes, they're barbed their teeth are gnarled. They're chasing after it I have my backpack raising a razon on what is going on here like a card these changed you to a fucking grocery store They're chasing me down this look there. They are and they're not chasing me look at how small they are they're not chasing me at all They just want to play No, they're just wait vicious dogs. They were I mean it's like a Jack Russell Terrier But I had a Yorkshire Terrier right there did I have a glass coke bottle in my hand and I had to debate having to kill the dog because You're out of your mind. You're out of your fucking mind. It'll grow some fucking balls, dude Let's get out of Lord's bird. Yeah, so that night I can get out of the city. Okay. All right. No more night that night Did nothing happen that night? Well, you're doing I need to get out of Lord's bird. We're gone. Okay, I couldn't eat any food Because there was no shop so I buy the thing a microwaveable to Keto's from the grocery store because that's all they had and Then I go to cook them and I didn't have a plate So I was like I'll just put it on the little disc and I open up the microwave and it's full of mold So I couldn't eat dinner that night and then on under both my pillows I was looking and there was just a bunch of black you know what you do is you put the tequitos underneath the pillow and the tequio fairy comes It leaves a meatloaf you know that Sleep tight little boy And the Keto fairy she warms it up Dude, I thought what you just said was brilliant I thought he said put it on your pillow your head will warm it up that way in the morning you have something to eat no I might fully cook tequito. Yeah, yeah, you could do that. The Keto the tequito fairy does come. Yeah, he does So what does she take if she warms your tequitos? What does she take from you? You have to leave her something. What do you mean she takes the tequitos? Oh, yeah, and she leaves you It's like a tooth you take the tooth. Yeah, but what does she leave you pesos? Three pesos, so you got you made money on the street. Yeah, you made money This was the economy and it was twenty six dollars a night the other motel that was right nearby me on the same strip I was forty dollars, so you were living high and I like it No, oh, you wouldn't that's crazy. How do you mean? I would just sleep standing up You wouldn't want to drive through the town. Oh, no, I love small towns like this Andrew and I when we're in small towns that we turn into Miracats, we yeah, we love it too. We're on we're on look. Yeah, look out. We're always on look out We're on the look out. I wasn't even a bar in this town There was literally nothing to do in this town So I just like went to bed the night before and then the next day I woke up and my bus was delayed by four hours So what'd you do? I just fucking started talking to locals. Guess what? Guess what? What we're still in Lord'sville All dry when you used nicotine in the past. 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Hems is more than just a prescription Nutrition lifestyle guidance are a part of the plan along with everything they were offering they got access to 24 seven messaging with your care team So you're always going to have someone in your corner ready to reach your goals visit Hems.com slash bad friends to get personalized Affordable care for weight loss hair loss, sex, testosterone and more that's Hems.com hms.com slash bad friends that's Hems.com slash bad friends I had two different transfers that had changed so this is why this is the main reason I had to change my whole bus schedule Because I planned it out ahead and I had to transfer this is gonna be a twenty five hour Carlos Can you put this in the fridge because I'd like to eat I do want to eat this at some point Can I can I say something real fast McCone because I you know I love you so much and you're my son. Yeah, but can you look at me real fast? I know What are you doing, babe? Oh, it's taking the chew I Know that get through your story. Yeah, you got to be hard It's fine on Tony guys. I leave I left the next morning with Tony call back. Oh, okay, Tony couldn't charge his phone His Tony's not even real. How do we know he's the statement of our man? He's not real. He met someone Some but they're like you see that long hair hippie talking to no one out there But we're concerned, dude. All right, so what else? So I left and I saw the guy cleaning the room and he helped me check out And I asked him about the dogs and he said oh, yeah, a lot of them come from across the tracks in Chinatown when they come into heat So horny dogs were chasing you horny dogs are chasing you. You do have long hair. You look like a pretty girl So then I talked to an old woman she runs a flower shop slash antique mall. Can I ask you a question? Yes, please tell me me we're out of this town. We're out of this town. Okay, so where did this happen? This happened in Kingsburg now. What? On the way to the bus. But we still in town. Yeah. Then you fucking lying bastard. Dude, he's a fucking lying bastard. That's what he does best. So I asked her about the dogs. And she said, I said, what happens if you give it? She said somebody had to get airlifted a few months ago because he got ripped apart by pit bulls in the middle of that neighborhood. But that those were pit bulls that chase you. Those there was a jack Russians. They were also in there. They send the Jack Russell out first to do the looking. Oh my god. And they alert the big ones in the back. Okay. This is our fault. I'm sorry about this. I did this. All right. Let's see. So this is just like the town. It's beautiful. What town? I'm out of the town. Where are the next bus? Yeah. So here's the next bus that pulls up. See, yeah, that one's a little. That's what I remember great. That was four hours late. And then it pulls up and the bus driver comes out and he's in a screaming match with the lady in the front seat. And she's screaming, fuck you, Mr. Bus driver, man. Everybody fucking hates you. But that's nice that you call him Mr. Bus driver, man. It was nice. He addressed him properly. And she said, and he said, ah, Jesus still loves me. She goes, ah, Jesus hates you. That's mean. That's mean. And that's not true. And then he said, you're my pick up. And I said, yes. And he said, you were going to be waiting here for 30 minutes. It's been hell. And I said, okay. And then I get on the bus. And this one is more like a prison bus. Like everybody has face tats and everyone looks really mad. Everyone's like Conair. Yeah. Conair, you said? Yeah. Well, it's con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. Con. What do you just say? Because if you said, my mind, I'm like, if he said Conair, that's funny. But what I heard wasn't Conair. He said Conair. Did he really? Yeah. Okay. It's Conair. Conair. But it's Con. Ground. It's on the ground, bud. It could be Conair. I'm a Gregor. You know, I mean, you never know. So this guy picked you up 30 minutes late. Then where do we go from now? We're four hours late. Now, where do we go from here? 30 minutes. So this bus is super packed. Like every seat is taken. My assign seat is all he said, he said, just try to find a seat. It's all packed. I didn't know they do assigned seats on Greyhound. They assign your seats. But I guess it doesn't matter because people fight for different seats. What was the numbering of it? Is it like a one, a two? It's exactly like a plane, except there's no middle seats. Okay. So that's nice. Two and two. I go find two open seats. I plot my stuff down. There's a guy behind me with a gold tooth. They say, hey, is anybody sitting in these seats? And he goes, yeah, fat ass white dude is sitting there. But he's been shitting on himself the whole ride. So I wouldn't sit there if I were you. And I said, is that seat next to you open? And he said, yeah. So I sat next to him. That's Mr. Fat ass white dude to you, sir. Yeah, dude. But this guy was cool. I gave him some of my McDonald's fries and he gave me a taco and we were hanging out and he was telling when you got your taco from McDonald's. No, he had a taco from a previous stop from where? I don't know. Can you hate it? Yeah. You ate a taco from a previous spot. It was a, it was a, it was a, you never eat tacos from a previous spot. Everybody knows that. Everyone knows that. It was a token of, it was a token of friendship and understand current spot. You eat tacos and current spot. Not previous. I took a risk. But also at that point, it was a good. No, no, no, it was really bad. By the way, I got a golden ticket this past week. I got a golden ticket. What does that mean? I got fries from McDonald's and in the bottom of it was like late night, tough part of town. I was driving home, sat with two hours away. I got a fries and in the bottom of the fries was one single chicken nugget. That's a golden ticket, dude. That's a golden ticket. Yeah, I should have gone. I should have gone play the lotto. That's insane. I've never seen a nugget inside the fries. I've seen a fry where it doesn't belong. Yeah. Never the reverse. And I thought, maybe that guy liked me. Yeah, one time I made bolognese spaghetti. I take ground beef, right? I fucking sauteed it, cut mushrooms. I drained it first. Oh, sounds good. Right? Mushrooms, onions, right? saute that. And then, you know, you poured over some spaghetti, right? And I found a piece of chicken in it. I had no idea where the fucking chicken came from, dude. It was a chunk, a chicken like this big in it. And I don't know where it came from. Was it just in the, probably in the pot from the last time you cooked? I don't know, but it was a gigantic chicken. I didn't even eat it because it's like, how do the fucking mystery chicken? Mr. But that could have been an omen from the universe. What? Jewels put it in there. It may be, but it was like fucking spooky. It's brilliant. It's brilliant. Yeah. To put chicken in there. If it jewels snuck in some chicken while you were cooking, that's brilliant. That's very funny. Yeah, yeah. Go ahead, my meal. Okay, go ahead. Let's get off of this photo and give me the chicken story. Beat the chicken story. So I asked him if the scuffle lady was yell in the whole time who was sitting up front, she said, yeah, she's been yelling slurs at everybody. She yelled at this lesbian couple that came on and but they were the ones that were fighting with everyone. They went up to this guy, old guy who was sitting in the front seat and she said, get the fuck up. I want to sit there and he said, no, this is my seat. And then she pulls a little thing out of her pocket and she says, bitch, I'm pyru. It's a pyru. A pyru is a good blood. Yeah. That's the, we branded. They're going to create. That's how central. Yo, man, tire of blood, man. Let's be called pyros, man. Marketing had said that they needed a new look. Imagine gangs have consulting meeting. Yeah. Yeah. We're thinking about changing a few things internally. Yeah. Look at our books, dog. Yeah. Uh, so pyru is in the area. We do more glocks than. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. What's next? So, yeah. So then she's like checking him and then he stands as a ground and says like, like, I'm not, I'm not moving. And she said, I see your standing with your woman. So I'll smack like a man if you don't get the fuck out of here. Whoa. What are you? What's going on here? It's so violent. That's the gray on bus. Was it a black man with a scar on his face? Like, what is going on here? There's a few. Yeah. Oh, wow. And then the ladies went back and sat down. But that was like the vibe of the bus. Orange is the new gray. And this was hardcore shit, dude. A lesbian fight on the bus. Oh my god. It's a great scene. You're like, did you write any of this down? It's brilliant. Then they're attracted people anywhere. No, no, no, you didn't mean anywhere. You're like, maybe. No, not even like airport hot. Oh, wow. Airport hot is good. Airport hot and set hot. Being on set a long time, you start to find people hot that you would never find hot. You're like, wow, that person's very attractive when you're on set stage. No, no, on set is on set when you're shooting people every day. You just there's some reason you have set crush. You're like, am I attracted to that? You would never see them like that. I know. I know. I know. So wild. I think I also was kind of nervous the whole time. So I wasn't really thinking about anything else other than just getting to the next town. So now, let's get to the next town. Can we cut out internal thoughts? Yeah. Okay. Thank you. So then the fat as well. I think that's going to help fat as your opinion and all that stuff. Yeah, yeah. So let's just get to the facts. Yes. So then the fat as white dude walked onto the bus and he had, you know, these basketball shorts and all down the back of the legs, he had liquid shit stains. Sick. Cool. And on his white tube socks, he had brown stains. So this is the kind of skip. This is not the hits, brother. Yeah, skip the downed shirt. This is that. This is crazy. I've never seen anything like this. You think I'm blown away that a guy should himself on a Greyhound bus. He had puke all down. And then next I did that yesterday. Yeah. On the CD was saying on the window next to him, there was a huge marker like you puke into the window. That's a whole thing. And then when we took off to Lord's burg on or from or back at Lord'sburg. When we go to Bobby, we're back at Lord'sburg. If you say Lord's book again, dude, I will leave. This gets a lady was yelling at a white guy with face tats. You said, I hope you get sickle cell before we get to El Paso. She started hitting him on the head while we were driving. And he said, if you touch me again, I'll fucking kill you. Funny. And she locked in. This is all funny stuff. On our next stop, the bus driver called the police on her and tried to get her arrested. And then the police talked him out of it. And they just said, you're so close to El Paso. Just get her there and get her. Funny. Very funny. And everybody had to lock in. And then we get to El Paso. This is killing. And then this old guy, you know, this sounds like, you know, when you ask a little kid, how was school? He's like, and then, and then, and then, and then that's what it was. No, I know. It's a lot of let's see some other image that might be. I wasn't filming anymore because I was really scared. You were scared the whole time. I'm sorry that you were scared. I was locked in though. I was like, I was talking to people. I started chatting with them. I was charged everyone's stuff. I charged up the guy who was probably going through an opioid crisis. The guy who was puking on himself and shitting himself. He needed a charger. Imagine being a woman at McCone's house like, and this happens when he brings a girl back to the house. She sits on the couch. She's like, can I show you something real fast? And then he turns it on and he goes through step by step, all this stuff. She's gone. And the girl's like, I was going to blow you. What do we got left on this video here? We got to speed it up because I'm literally born. That's fine. We can you on it. No, I like it. I feel closing. I know. I know about life and your experience. That's not a good environment to tell a story. No, do a closing. I like one of the things that wrapped up in a great environment. Tell story. But the stories have to be concise. The story is very long. Right. It's an atmospheric thing. It's not stories, dude. No, they're not. These are vignettes of the American road. You can handle it on the Greyhound. Whoa. He starts fire. You mean specifically or be man doing both of you, but you specifically. Whoa. You love the view of it. You specific. You think Andrew would have a less hard time than I. Definitely. Why? He's fat. You're the guy. Oh, he's not. He's got more than Midwestern. No, that's not true. That's not true. Even when you lived in the Midwest, you lived in Idina. The Greyhound doesn't even stop in Idina. Oh, my god. Idina, Idina, Idina, Idina, Idina. My parents moved there. Yeah. I'm like my parents were rich. It wasn't me. It's like, yeah, you're still rich by the transit of poverty. Dude, you started this probably. Look at he's lighting you up now. Look what he did. You don't like the story. I'm getting what he was doing the same thing. No, he was encouraging. And you were not. He was encouraging. Yeah. The stories. Yes. He was saying, get to the highlights. Get to the point. You're putting your head down. Right. And I also, I mean, honestly, that's how I listen, dude. I put my head down. And I close my eyes and I listen. And I've also been honest. He. who would handle it better than you could, but both of you couldn't handle it. - I could handle it. We could easily do it. - It hurts me so bad. You know what? We should, oh fuck you, dude. - Yeah, we should take a Greyhound trip. - No, I'm talking about the disrespect from you. - Well, here's the truth. It's disrespect. - Here's the truth. We, we, I'm so mad right now. - We could do anything, but I don't want to. - Yeah. - I don't wanna do it. - You can't make me do it. - Do it. - But I could do it. - You should prove to him that you can do it. - Yeah. - You can go to a Greyhound trip, to Dallas. - I used to take megabuses when I was in England. You know, megabuses for a dollar? - I would take them from Chicago to America. - I love that band, megabuses. - One salad. (laughing) - Megadeth, I don't know. - Honestly, I liked it. I don't think so. - The megabuses were nicer than the Greyhounds. - They could be. There was depending on how far out you were going. - Well, the, the worst thing about it is like, so when I got to El Paso eventually, the layover of the bus I originally would have had because all my chick got fucked up because of how far it was late. The next what they had meant was 16 hours later. They could be out of the station, they close at seven, and they give a lot of addicts and people just like, here's $30 to go to a hotel. You can't afford a hotel. Who gives them money? - The Greyhound station. They have to reimburse these people because it's messed up the amount of cancelling that happens because they are late as the money, and they give these addicts money and they go out, and then of course they spend it on drugs, but they have to sleep on the street. And it's like. - That's why. - It's not like, it's not their fault. Like, these people who are traveling there, they all don't want to be traveling on it, and they're also getting from Point of Boy B. They're all good people. Like the main point. I actually, there was a couple of moments where I was actually nervous on the bus, and then I had to lock and they'd be like, they're all just people trying to get from Point of Boy B. - Correct. - And I had a really a lot of really beautiful, nice company. - They're human beings trying to just live their lives. - It's a beautiful perspective that you gained. So are you happy that you did it? - I'm really, I would honestly do it again, and I really had a fun time doing it. - So I was right. - And yes, you were, and I would love to do it. - So guess what guy. Next time we go on tour. (laughing) Because of what you said to me, right? Because of what you said. - Oh no, the next tour, you're gonna meet us in every city and you're gonna take a bus. - It's logistically impossible. - Yeah, it's very inconvenient. - I don't care. - Actually, make it happen. - Make it happen. - Make it happen. - Because of the scheduling of the bus. - Make it happen. Because I'm not going to be on a tour bus with you. What you did to me today was uncalled for. Put us both in the same box. - Feel free to put me wrong. - Wow, I liked this. - This is hot hot heat coming off of him. - I don't like it. - I mean, it's interesting if nothing more. - That's fine. - I mean, he's taking shots. The kid has to swing. He's 26 years old now. He's a big boy. - Do you want to call Tony? - Is it the segment? - No, will you call Tony real fast? - I do love to talk to Tony. - Oh yeah. And then by the end of the trip, I guess this is how I'll wrap it up. By the end of the trip, I was meeting other people and I'm still keeping up with Tony. 'Cause I gave Tony tickets to our show, but he couldn't make it because everyone's Greyhounds get-- - What show? - Backstage tickets. - Yeah, our Bobby show in Atlanta. - Oh wow. - You didn't even come? - He couldn't make it. - Why? - The Greyhounds get delayed. - Oh my god. - I was waiting for him. I was like 45 minutes late on the show. - Where's Tony? - Where's Tony? - At one AM, one of these nights, he texted me. He said, man, we got in a wreck with an 18-wheeler SMH. I ain't fit to make that show, 'cause oh, LOL, these motherfuckers tripping. - So Tony was a white guy? - Yeah. I'm just reading the text. And then I said, "Shipper, are you alright?" And he said, "Yeah." - We talked to him. - How old is Tony? Maybe. - 50? - Oh, young guy. - Yeah. - Okay. - He said, "Are you alright?" He said, "Yeah, the women are pretty shook, but I'll be fine." This shit happened in Marshall, Texas, man. We got on the road a couple hours ago where we was at a long, still standstill. My shit gonna be pushed back another day more than like. - So Tony rules. - Yeah. He said, "Shit's wild for real free." - Did he make it to Tennessee? - He did. He made it, and he's been with his family. - That's beautiful. - That is actually awesome. - But here's the beautiful thing he said at the end of the thing. He said, "I don't feel like this is a real person. Why are we talking to this person?" - Yeah, she B.T. - Do you want me to pretend to be Tony? - Yeah, man. She was wild for real free. I was mad, then I just gave it a man. I'll get there when I get there. Getting pissed won't help her speed up the process. - Very zen of him. - He is very zen. - Hey, Tony. - Oh shit. - What's up, bro? - Ask him first. - Yeah, I'm at the bar right now. I wasn't even really supposed to be here. I was just walking to see the. I'm like, "You have a thing changed in the scene, bro." - You said you're at the bar right now? - Yeah, come to find out. A couple of the homies are at bartenders, so we're just chilling right now. - That's great. You're on bad friends. You're on the podcast. - What's up, man? - What's up, Tony? - It's just what's up with you. - What's up, Tony? Motherfucker, dude. - What's up? How y'all doing? - Good, Tony. What bar are you at? - We over here. Let's see. It's not a state line. Hey, what bar are we in, Brian? Oh, man, is that here in Bristol to the sea, bro? - Nice. - Wow. That's right, I told them how you met your wife, 'cause I really, I love that story. Taco Bell? - Oh, that shit was-- - Taco Bell? - Wild. - Yeah. - She got shot? - Yeah. - Yeah, oh, yeah. She took a hollow point. (laughing) - Yeah, she is like a dark one, bro. If you missed, you were just a blind shot, bro. But yeah, she said she ate it, bro. Like a fucking happy meal. (laughing) - That is when she ate the hollow point. Well, I'm talking right now. She wasn't even talking this loud, homie. I swear to God, she was like, ooh, hey, yeah, you won't be mad, but then it removed the wound and then it was squirted, now like a bitch is spingin' on herself, it was squirted. (laughing) - Where did she get shot? - Yeah, so I'm hit. - It was in the tibia, right? I got about like, I mean, it just points above the kneecap, bluer tibia, ruptured kneecap. And that's just, she's right here beside of me, bro. - Put her on. - Yeah, can you put her on? - What's up? - Can you put her on? - Oh, absolutely, here she is. - Here's what I want to talk about. - She said I want to talk. Come on, I want to put the back of this podcast over so. - Hi. - We heard you got shot. (laughing) - She said, hi, okay, that's it, that's it, that's it, okay. (laughing) - All right. All right. - Good to meet you, Tony. - Tony, we love you. - We love you, buddy guys. - Always nice to meet you. I wish I could have made it, bro, to the Atlanta show. I was trying to make it, bro. - I waited an hour for you. You never showed up, man. - I had to fake the injury, bro. Gotta get it out the bus. (laughing) - And I wish I could get it in a wrench. And I told them all the times to say, whatever it can give you some money, bro. - Hey, when we go back to the South, we'll, to Tennessee, we'll look you up. - Bro, you got, I'm not even on social media 'cause I used to do some, how do I say this for lilies? I used to be in some nefarious acts back in the day, bro. (laughing) - I used to, how everybody says, oh, they're on demon time. Oh, I was really all that type of-- - Wow, wow, wow, what? - Tony. - It was bad, it was bad, but I changed my ways, you know? - Yup. - Yeah, I changed my ways. I don't be doing too much enough. I've been part of my business to say it out the way, bro. - All right, well, when we-- - We're in town, bro, y'all got my number. - Yeah, we'll have, come and call you. - I will help you out, book a spot, whatever I could do, we gonna do it, bro. 'Cause I do music out here. - Oh, okay. - I do music, bud. - What's up? - What kind of music? - Oh, hip hop, rap, basically anything. I do live shows, bro. I used to go ahead and try to get in with everybody. - Open art shows. - Yeah. - Like, studios and companies and all that year, bro. But the last company I talked to was like, it was at Lennon Records and they wanted me to basically bend over and talk about my shoes, but got time, my shoes, so I couldn't go along now, bro. - Can you-- - Yeah, my insurance thing, I'll cover no more, that was just-- (laughing) - Tony, can you spit for us real fast? - Oh, let's get a quick scene of something about bad friends. - Yeah. - Oh, shit, I got a little bit too much liquid in the system, bro. (laughing) We'll see, hey, bro, let me go ahead and get a little bit more clear of mine than I go and spit you a little some hot, bro. - And send it to us. - Send it to us. - Send it to us. - Yeah, for sure. - You already know, bro. If you wanna occupy well, let me know if you want a certain type of beat. Let me know, and then yeah, maybe one day we can go ahead and link up and do it professionally. - Whatever you feel like, get that shit going and we'll do it loud, bro. We'll do it loud, bro. - Yeah. - All right, Tony. - Sure, could you say thank you for being a bad friend? - Well, I just wanna say thank you for being a peace of shit friend and a bad friend. - I'm so thankful to be over here on the podcast, bro. Shout to my homeboy, McCone. Hey, shout to everybody that's in front of the cameras. And a way to live with the red hair. I fuck with you, bro. - I fuck with you. - I fuck with you, Tony. - Just do whatever your name is, bro. Now I'll fuck with you. (laughing) - How can I help you? (laughing) - I raced. - All right, Tony. - Thank you, Tony. - I love you. Thank you for being a bad friend. (upbeat music) (upbeat music)