Adult Happy Meal! w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley

Gang that back on the block tour, just keeps rolling on, grab your tickets, grab the squad, come on out, see the boys. Yeah, this May we got Los Angeles. Then we're doing the comedy seller in New York City, La YG and Friendshow, Portland, Maine. Those tickets are going fast. We got two shows in Pittsburgh, then Cleveland, Ohio, Atlantic City, New Jersey, this summer, the boys are going down the shore and then comedy works and then forget those tickets. Come to a live show. We love you. Love you. Hey, everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is are you garbage? You know it. It's that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find it at the group to be classy. Yeah. They're just a big old piece of trash. Trace, trace, trace. I'm your host, Dave Trolley coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here with Tudy's in a new edition. She woke me up six in the morning. Okay, blast and shock a con. Okay, bump it going old school on me. Nice. You know what I mean? I feel your dog. McCulloch's coming at you from across the tables. We call the family episode, just the boys, the bozos and the homies just the way we like it. He is my best pal in the whole wide world and with summer approaching back to being the king of the boys. Big show in Atlantic City coming up down in the line. Get the picky game. Kevin James Ryan, everybody. What up gang shout out to you as always. Thanks for tuning in. Please make sure you're right. You subscribe on iTunes full video available, YouTube full video available over there and Spotify. The boys are climbing the charts. We're in the charts. We're in the fucking charts. We're in the charts. We're slowly getting to the top of the, I don't know what it where it starts at the top of the charts. We pop back and forth. We need a top 100 all podcast and we're top 100 comedy podcasts. Huh? Just a couple of small town boys made good. I don't want to tell you take that. Hey, I love it. The fat boys are on top. Yeah. Fat boys used to be box. Got it. Do you remember the fat boys? No. Really? I mean, I do in theory. Yeah, I remember a they're a movie. Camera was called. Fat boys do something. It wasn't go to the gym. I know that much. Hey gang. The big man said if we got a show in Atlantic City, the boys are going down the shore at the hard rock casino and hotel. Maybe I don't know. I made up the Internet. I don't think it's at the hard rock. Yeah, hotel hotel and casino would be called what I say. Casino and hotel. I think it'd be hard rock different. I flip flop. They do it. That old school. We're gonna play the tables down here. Yeah, I played the tables. I don't know if I've ever been in a hard rock down here. I got to be honest with you. Didn't know it existed. Really? That's why I was like I'm not sure. Shout out to him. I might have been in there one time. We used to have a little thing for some reason around college age. We take a bunch of shrooms and go down it. I don't think it offseason newer. Find out when the hard rock casino. Well, there's no way that's been around that long. I feel I've been tripping in okay. An odd amount of casinos. Uh-huh. Well, I mean to make sense lights thing. Yeah, fucking freak you out dog. Man, talk about a guy red line at it. It's fucking casinos will give you panic attacks when you're not over stimulate. Uh-huh. Hit me. What do you got? 1990. Whoa. And you can't really the Trump Taj Mahal. Now, I used to go down in high school and play that Taj Mahal had a good poker room. How could you say it was formerly the Taj Mahal in 1990? You want to run here in 1990? No, I know. So I'm saying you were 40. The building was there in 1990, but the Trump Taj Mahal, the Taj, I was going to the Taj in 2005. 2003, four and five ish. So it had they had to take over Taj clothes in 2014. Hey, it became the hard rock. There you go. 2014. There you go. Um, yes. Uh, but anyway, get those tickets. That's a good freaking time. It's sold out. The boys are going out of show going out of show. I'm bringing a tully not. I would love to try to get a see if something like a five gallon jug of tully nuts or something. Pass on the green room. Having a green girl fucked up. Uh, yeah, some of us. Um, and then obviously, uh, gang Netflix is a joke festival in La La Land. Get those tickets at the ballesco theater. May seven, I believe. That's coming up. That's a couple of weeks. Get some tickets. Bring the squad. Come see us. Yeah, the boys are going to be so good for the suits. Yeah. This is definitely going to go. You got to go tap dance and show everybody. Hey, kids, kids. We got a, we got a special annoy again, a cutting room guy trying to try to sell that. Well, sell that. Mm-hmm. That's like iced tea. You know, iced tea walked in, got a record deal. Didn't give him a demo or nothing. Just convince the guy. Give it to me. That's iced tea. You know, iced tea. And what are you? Huh? Yeah, fires. I was like, what did you say? Yeah, so I'm speaking of, uh, I got something I want to start off with. I believe you have something for me. Uh, you know, I come across my desk. There is, uh, this, uh, this, uh, this hits a few points of, uh, things that are near and dear to our heart a little bit. Uh, my dad. Okay. Just a picture picture of everybody who's died in your life. I have a montage and a memorial of everybody that fully's ever lost. Oh, man, talk about that. I might even put you in a better mood today. That might cheer you up. It's coffee things. Very chocolate. Uh-huh. Good. That's quick. You got there. Um, I was, uh, as you know, diner, we're a big diner guy in New York diners. You like a diner. Used to be. Yeah. Right. Used to be. What do you mean? What's it? Yeah. Wait, wait, wait, wait. You know, what do you mean? You used to be. You're not a diner guy. I'm, you know, I, I better these days. What's that? Yeah. Oh my god. We're just starting off with. I'm down 85 pounds. What are you talking about? Keep, first of all, it's 80, 85 now. Whatever. I'm, hold on. What did we're happy for? Also, you can eat healthy. You can eat very healthy at a diner. You want to get to California plate with the cottage cheese and the jello? No thanks. It's like I like that. I get delivery guy. Well, you got my California plate. You love a diner. I love a diner. Come on. We can't. No, I don't know why you're doing this. Not anymore. I like steak fries. I like, I like, I like getting the on train. They give me the soup and the salad and the, and the bibs get a bread. Yeah. I like diners, man. I'm fucked up. That's the most normal thing about you. Um, that's what I'm saying. This goes to show. And diners in New York diners are, are all wayward rest stop for, uh, in home for dirt bags alike in New York. And losers. You go into your fucking, you, you, you, you get a cup of coffee, you can sit there with your friends and talk about what you want the future to look like. Uh-huh, which we did a lot of. Yes, we did. And if you go to a dive, if you're frequent in diner enough, they, they, they, the staff knows you. I went into that West 4th diner down there. You told me that recently. Same fucking guys. Yeah. Same guys. They had the big fat sausages too. Oh, yeah, they do. Like a fat meal. What's the, what's the, got the breakfast meat? Now they have those over stuffed sausages. Yeah. Which I like. Do you like a tiny little twink ones? Like the big heavy bike johns. Well, they're more like British sausages. Hello. I can, I saw this thing. So apples and pay. I'm walking down the apples and pays. Uh-huh. That's the stairs. Okay. I know. But I like, I like sometimes even with, with a breakfast. You know why you do. Why? Well, you know, um, you like being told. You're a fucking twisted guy. This guy's a real twisted twisted end to evil. Um, I like sometimes dipping my sausage and mustard the way the Brits do. Oh my god. You should write a book sometime. Well, you can't do a regular breakfast sausage like those skinny links. Yeah, be crazy. I do it. Those girthy ones. Those girthy on the circumsides. John, you're a pee and cut. Yeah. You're a big guy. Um, so this is all very of that. I set that. There's a new diner's been closing left and right. They're too expensive. They can't the food. New York City. They're closing. There's been a bit of a revamp of the place. Tank and culturally. I'm dummy. Uh, I, um, I go. There's a new diner opened up in my neck in a woods. Yes, that's true. I've heard about this place. What? You told me. Okay. You told me. Okay. All right. And I think me and, uh, what do I mean? These are up there for something. Maybe. Yeah. We walked by it. You're stalking me. No. Why the fuck are we up there? And drop picking me up or something. Drop me off probably. Yeah. I remember walking down the street with somebody. And I said, hey, we should go here. And then somebody walked by. I was like, the food is delicious. Oh, just open that weekend. Yeah. And I hadn't been yet. Yeah. New diner. Who was I up there with? I think diesel. Huh. Interesting. I never take anybody's advice from this. It's not that interesting. You know four people. When somebody says, Oh, the food is delicious. I fuck you. When you work there, you need something trying to sucker me in there. It was a new place. Yeah. And it was just open that weekend. It's in the neighborhood. I think the local neighborhood people were supporting it. That's nice. Yeah. I like that. Okay. I think that's why he was telling you the food's good. Yeah. I'm not, I'm not buying it. That's good for a good for a guy like you. Maybe. I like mustard on my sausages. I'm no both. I'm waiting for the fucking, uh, you know, the health that's back to get in there. Let them get their fucking. Let them make their mistakes. It's soft. Yes. It's soft opening. Soft opening is bad. Uh-huh. Friars not working. Kid. Don't know what he's doing. That's why like tapery. You ambush everybody with the soft openings. There's never a hundred people walking in at once. That's a stress. That's a task for stress tests. Everybody knows that. Well, you know that that they're going to fail. Oh, turn of heat. Yeah. Find out where they fail. A bunch of mouth breathers walking in. Judging all the follies are there. Addies there. Those people are always spoken here. - They're always such dicks. They walk in like they're the Kennedys. Oh, man. - I remember thinking I would-- - What are you talking about, you rat? If Tapper wasn't picking up the tab, he'd be out in his street. - I would never want to be on one of those shows. - No? - Even in like the sense of like, I'm hanging out in a place that's hanging on by a thread. - Dive bar to side, obviously, but like, you know, also-- - Well, you wouldn't want to be like the mixologist going in under cover? - Do you mean Johnny Tips? - Yeah. - I remember thinking, that was the first time that they, and she's like, this is Johnny Tips, and they cut to him like with a shaker. And I went, his last name's Tips, that's crazy. I said, oh, this is a fucking stage. - They were always bartenders that like sort of like Benniggins and like, they're all corporate bartenders. - Sure. - Not shot in beer, guys, like we're used to right now. Guys that can point in the right direction. If you know what I mean, they open late. - Yeah. - Down there to Shady's bar. - What if lines are always drawn? - But that aside, I popped in the other day with my wife and my son. - Is that right? - Oh, a little late breakfast for me. I'm doing intermittent fasting. - Aren't you? - Yeah. - Aren't you? - Okay. - You weren't doing that with beers that aren't pots down. - I didn't have any beers in pots down. - Yeah, right. You had a whole tray of garage beers. I've seen them in there. - I didn't, first of all, that's on the rider. Shout out to garage beers. - Shout out to garage beers. - Also, shout out to Soldiers. That was awesome. - Great time. - Let me tell you this. - Great time. - That, those lemon pepper wings were something else. - I know, it was garlic parmesan. - Mm-hmm. - Take a tea right now. - Lemon pepper wings, were you at the King of Diamonds? - No, these are lemon pepper wings. - Right, right, right. - But they had a garlic parmesan sauce down here. I'll tell you right now, garlic parmesan is really taken over the wing market. That's it, we just go for garlic parmesan. - That's what they're doing. - I swear to God. - They are, that sauce was delicious. All that aside, I pop in. You know how like, you know diners, like you said, you like to get like the dinner, the entrees. - I love that. - All right, they always have a decent, special go on. - And they treat you better. - They treat you better when you get home. - They treat you better. - Good gentleman. - So I popped in, this was the market. At first thing I saw and I said, you know what, as a society, we're gonna be all right. I had never seen this before. Maybe this is a new trend and I had never seen this marketing in my life. - What happened? - Really peaked my interest. Hit it. The adult happy meal. A double patty smash burger fries in a bottle beer. Your choice available all day, every day, 1995, out there. Where can you beat that? - That's pretty good. - I wasn't even in the mood for, I mean, it was about 11 o'clock in the morning. I wasn't in the mood for a beer, a burger, a french fry. I didn't get it. That was my family, a family man. I had to do fucking airplane mode with a pouch of, string bean mash. But if it was me, you or some, I would have fucking set an adult happy meal. - I'd never seen that. - I respect it. - Look at that. - Yeah. - That's there's something. - I thought it was too big. That could be two beers. This is a little missed. I put one bottle of beer. - Yeah, I'd listen. You get you looking though. - Yeah, I'm soul. - Maybe that's the thing that get you looking. - I was soul. - Why is there two beers in? That's what I would say. - Well, let's order it and find out. - Yeah. - Also, price point, why? - Choice of bottle beer. - There you go. Maybe one's domestic, one's imported. - Yeah, they got a bud light in a high shade there, you know. - Yeah. - That's real nice. - 1995 for a double smash. That looks like a double smash cheeseburg, right? Double pavvy. - Double pavvy. - Smash burger fries and choice of bottle beer. - That's gonna run you. The burger, a burger fries alone would run you. 15, 99. Something like that, right? - You wanna know a good gimmick to throw in with that? They're only like a dollar. - What? - You buy like a thousand matchboxes. And you get a matchbox, you get a Hot Wheels with it. - Oh, like a toy. - Yeah. - Oh. - I thought it meant like a matchbook. - Yeah, a matchbook. (laughing) - A match potato? I don't want the fries, I don't have a match potato. - Yeah, people always love it. Especially people who are a toy, some sort of trinket would be nice. - Yeah. - Spider-ring, something like that. - Maybe some for adults that this is for adults. - Like what? - I don't know, what do adults use? - I don't know. - I don't know, not spider-rings. - Yeah, I can't go back to work. - I have to have a double smash burger friend. - Hey Lenny, check it out. - And four beers and a fucking wrist full of fucking. - Well, not, I know you were down there at the joint getting the happy meal. - Kippy, Kippy, what'd you do for lunch today? - I'm a fucking spider-ring. - I'm tapping, I'm typing a fucking eight spider-rings on. - Not the boss. - Press most like garlic parmesan. - Uh-huh, the adult happy meal. - Home run. - That's fucking home. I love that. - And maybe it is, hit me up. This is a new thing or if other places are doing it, I never saw this. - I've, somewhere in the back of my subconscious, I feel like I've seen a little bit of this, but-- - I mean, it makes sense. - But that's first of all, that's a deal. - New York City, that's a deal. - Give me a favorite. - Look, if you don't mind. If you don't mind, just a little bit of work. - You're such a dick. (laughing) - Fuck me and back, everybody run. - Oh my God, a bug. - I mean, a wake here, not like that. - Somebody get a big piece of tissue so I can squash ya. - Flags, I'm a bug man. - Yeah. - Yeah, you good and try it. - I don't kill bugs. (laughing) - I'm talking about people I don't know. (laughing) - You know, bug jankin'. - Would you give me a price check on a burger? - Yeah. - Run that. - Give me a cheeseburger deluxe. - New York City diner. - See what that is. - I would argue, I mean, a cheeseburger deluxe. - It's gotta be 15. - But that's one, that's single patty still. - It's double smish burger. - Double patty. Probably skimpin' on the patty's a little bit. - Maybe, you know, and we get to whom? - Yeah, whatever. - Who slices a cheese? - It looks like, at least according to the artist's rendering. - Yeah. - Why does he get hit with an LTO? - I don't think they do that on a smash, do they? I think smash is just traditional. - Oh really? - The cheese and the meat. - I like it on Dio's lawn a pickle. - Let's, I'm sure they would accommodate. - What do you got, Luke? - With fries at that 24 hour diner we all went to. A few, like six months ago. - Are you used to be Tavoli? - Yeah. - That one that they took over? - Where? - Well, 23rd or something? - Yeah, I think I'm, yeah, 24th maybe. - Yeah, it was the old Tavoli. - Yeah. - That's gonna be 15 bucks with french fries. - Wow. - 15, so you're at first. - Single smash burger. - Let's go, I want a double patty. That's four bucks right there. - Sure. - You're 1999 without the beer. - Shout out to this joint. - That's gonna run you 25. - 25 bucks. - Available every day. - All day ever you walk in. I'll do the adult happy meal. Me, that's a good time. - A lot of men, a lot of guys, not me. - Yeah. - Like men, they like a burger and a beer. - Yeah, but I was ever, anytime we were, I was working construction. It was like I could never do like the beer at lunch. I was never that guy. - Yeah, you'd be asleep in the truck, I'm the worst. - The second I eat, it's, I've gotten a little better as I got an older, but the second I have like, even a fucking, a cheese day gig roll. I'm like, oh, sleepy, make sleeps in. - I've never been working at Martell's back in the day, like higher workers come in there and they have like, burger, beer, couple beers, go back to work. - Yeah. - I would be fucking out. - Yeah, and I'm not built out of it. - C.B., night night time. - Higher guy. - Dude drinking Guinness at lunch. - Jesus, that's like a stack of pancakes. - I would do it when I was working in an office. - I never like going out to lunch, but there was a couple other secret theories I hung out, a couple of other broads that would make me take me out for my birthday and stuff like that. - That's cute. - And they would all, we don't get drunk. And I'm like, the last thing I want to do is fucking skull-to-budwizers, the fucking- - You get drinks? - I would do one, 'cause they would. - They weren't drinking beer either. - They don't like margaritas and stuff. - Yeah, something like that. - They'd go back to the work, I'll fire it up. - Uh-huh, and then I'm like, did I want fucking sleepy as shit? - They're not. - Yeah, probably go home and throw one at a husband. - Sure, that's all right. - You ever drink at your desk? Like a little nip? - No. - No? - I'm not like a mixed business and pleasure guy. If I'm drinking, I'm clearing this docket and I'm drinking. I'm not like, I don't like drinking and then like going and doing stuff. I'm drinking, if I'm drinking. - How's about to say, I've never been at work drunk, but I don't know that a lot. (laughing) - Gek please? - That's how I'm waiting tables, you always, yo. - Sure. - You know what I mean? - Try to beer? - Let me get a taste of this. - Skull that. - Bathroom. - You get a couple of bits. - Oh. - All right, listen, all that's neither here nor there, but check out an adult happy meal in your area. And if you, maybe if you run a small establishment or you work in a small establishment, implement the adult happy meal. - If it's not big, it's gonna be big this summer. - Could be big this summer. - Just like that, I'll a language song. That's big. - You're really pushing that. It is. - You know about this? - You've asked me about it multiple times. I think I just, like, I've chosen Texas. - Solid and passing. - That's it. - God damn hit right there. - It's beautiful too, but that's beautiful. - Beautiful girl. - Beautiful woman. - What is it? - Beautiful girl. - Beautiful girl. - A beautiful girl. - There's nothing to do with this. - It's very talented. - You brought it up. - I like this song, it's a good song. - That's a beautiful girl. - Mm-hmm. - Can't be talking about Shopify. - Shopify. - Shopify. - True thinking here. - I know a couple of people that you Shopify. - Mm-hmm. - Oh yeah, we you Shopify. - Oh, though. - If you've ever bought a T-shirt or a hat. - Or a deck of cards. - Or a deck of cards, that Shopify. Streamlines, everything makes everything easy. And I know we got a lot of hustlers out there. A lot of guys brick and mortar stores to use as a favorite. I think it's kind of coming to the point. point now. Shopify is taking over your buddy. So they ain't getting smaller. Yeah, and here's the thing. We've handled the merch. You've been to our website. It's Shopify website. The store all powered by Shopify. I bought something on the road powered by Shopify. Shopify. Uh, we, we before Shopify, we handled it all of our sell. There was things flying out of the printer. I got stickers all over my eyes. I'm taking things to the man. It was, it was a mess. Shopify handles it all stream lines it. Uh, Shopify is your commerce expert with the world class expertise and everything for managing inventory to international shipping to process returns and beyond. Uh, it's like having a marketing team behind you, easy to create email and social media campaigns, wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling Shopify can get in front of them to help you convert. They're scrolling. You're strolling. That's, uh, it's time to turn those what ifs into, uh, Shopify money today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial at Shopify.com/garbage. Go to Shopify.com/garbage. One more time. Get a penny to pencil. Shopify.com/garbage. Do it. Can't be what about chubbies. Chubbies. Chubbies. Chubbies. Chubbies. What about chubbies? Just take it over to summer. You'll love to see it. Chubbies is big in the summer. They're big all year round. Yeah. But chubbies in the summer get a nice bathing suit. I got one that they gave me. I think last the red John that didn't fit. Now I'm into it. I know it. And I'm going to break this thing out and I'm going to be strutting my skin to the last all around that pool down here club bully. So if you want to get a peek. Uh-huh. Come see it. He's letting the thighs breeze and that's what chubby does. Maybe whether you're playing around the golf with the boys hitting up. Maybe a couple of daybeers popping around. You're doing outside. They got you covered for all the good vibes that warm weather brings chubbies as you covered. They got their classic line swim collection has your new favorite trunk for those sunny days. Soft and dangerously flexible incredibly quick drying swim trunk. This is the first time first time I saw chubbies in person years ago. First time I saw chubbies in person. My cousin Michael Hadamon. He got out of the ocean. I said, you know what the heck is even is. I got to get me a pair of them came out looking cool cool design looks dries walk. Well, you weren't sweat pants. Oh, I was like a bozo. I didn't appear at Dongarees. Whether you're getting dressed for your work day, I'll work out or a weekend getaway chubbies as you covered for a limited time. Chubbies is giving our viewers 20% off your order with the code garbage at chubbyshorth.com. That's code garbage at chubbyshorth.com. Support the show and tell them the police saying you don't blend in with the crowd staying out with chubbies. Chubbies. Again, we got a gastron family episode on our hands. As you know, when you sign up for the old patreon a you'll get your garbage question red on the air and we got one two tree humdingers right here. This is a good one. This is from a guy who's gotten a handful of questions read because I remember the name. This is from banister, lannister $10 homie here. Did you have to drive to your own wedding? That's a good one. That's a really good one. I've never thought about that. Drive into the wedding means you're probably driving back. Right. You're not the wife. The dress is hanging up the passenger door. Yeah, that's a tough one I feel. Drive into the wedding as the guy, as the groom. Yeah, it's tough. That's a small town wedding. Yeah, you would have to assume. I took an Uber. That's two young kids. Come on. You get that city hall. I'm just cheering. How much was transportation to yours? It is expensive. I'm well aware. Nice. Uh-huh. You were on that bus drinking beer. I had to take a plane to yours. The fuck you talking about. Hey, thanks for coming. Anywho, um, that's a tough one I get unless it's like that's very like to me. If that like you that's a little, you know, taking it off that that feels a good to do like you're running errands. Yeah. You get in the car. We're going to go get mad. We're going to go home. It's very 80s to me. I picture like one of my cousins doing that. Yeah, they got there. They got like half the tucks on the shirts open. They stopped by the church. It's like out of a movie. Yeah. Find a collute Trump. Get married today. We'll get over to you jerky. Uh-huh. I gotta go stop and see about someone real quick. Yeah. Why wouldn't he be married? You know, I guess a ploddle right there. Maybe she's Jewish. They're going to listen. Maybe. Uh-huh. Another, another parish, let's say. Okay. God forbid. He's a pleasant user. That's really going to, too, because I, this is the one time that someone kind of blew my mind. I always thought limos were wildly fancy. And like it's what rich people did. And maybe in the 80s, like the businessmen, but then someone schooled me on a during the show at some point that they were like, it's real. They're actually very trashy. Trashy. And it like, I guess that happened in like the 90s to 2000s where it's like, it's only kids going to prom. Yeah. Who throw up in them. It's a pain in the ass to get in there. First of all, sure. You're down there. And SUVs nice. I think when the SUV started popping off, they tried to kill them. Yeah. Sprinters too, got pretty, you know, like the party bus a little bit. Yeah, the party bus. And not to mention, they kind of did it to themselves with the fucking with the Hummer limo. That was the end of it. Sure. That was a little gaudy. But that was at the height. That was like when an antarage was cooking, rap was big. That's like a fucking Hummer limo. That's chicks throwing up and like dudes like beating up like waiters and stuff like that. Yeah. It's it's it's a fuck you. What? Well, it was also, they beat kid. They're like relatively affordable. It's not like in my head, they were like a million dollars. But if you got 20 people and you're like, Oh, we're all going somewhere. It's like 30, 40 bucks ahead for the night. Now that being said, I was like a billionaire or something like that. I'd only exclusively roll a limo. Why is that? I don't know. It just seems cool. Yeah, it's gotta be. I mean, I know Stern rolls like that all limo. Really? I think so. That's what I hear. They run me with a limo driver. But yeah. Uh-huh. What some do with some nickel on them. That's really all I want. You just want a guy with a gun around you. That'd be cool to have like a handler. Like a dude like that that takes care. I saw one who works closely with you. Yeah. You can't be handled. What do you mean? If you had a gun. That's why he's got a gun. Fucking Foley. Do it, man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You got to trash out. Listen, you ain't got a piece. You got a gun to my head. One. I'm aroused. Two. I can't get nothing done. I'm hard on that. Yeah. That'd be cool. That's fun to get to get to that point. Just have like a dude like that. A dude with a gun. Yeah. Yeah. That like, you know, takes care of shit. Uh-huh. We know a few people have that. Yeah. Not know them personally, but we've seen them. They've seen made on fire before. Are they coming out with a TV show with that? Is that true? I heard that. I saw a man on fire with like a younger Denzel. And they're doing Cape Fear. Why? I don't get it. Nothing against Javier Boyd. Damn. He's God damn genius. What are you doing, man? What are you doing? Sure. Somebody write something. Hit me up. Yeah. Plenty of ideas. All right. This one's from Moneymark 97 $10 homie for three or four years. Now genuinely never have one red crying emoji. My apologize. Well, you came with a hung umdinger. Ever wrote a bike barefoot. Oh, something don't feel right about that. Talk about. It's one at summertime. Your problem. I was always like wet from like a pool to or something or like you were scraped to top of your feet. Get them. Get that big toe knuckle. You had to like push hard, but yeah, you had to push lightly because like the, the, the, the, not the spokes, like the traction in the pedals. Yeah. You had to have said a metal, metal, uh, digging the two. I remember Danny. Like a gaysha metal pedals. Yeah, it was brutal. Yeah. I was walking on hot coals. Yeah, man. Yeah, that's, that's asking for a fucking jammed up toe. That's jammed up. And as well as, I remember one time I saw a guy riding a bike with another bike. And I was like, that guy is doing something wrong. Yeah. He's either stole that bike. It's like a horse. Do horses out of town in the middle of the man. Oh, man. I always seen that. And that was always a day. You killed that guy. It was on that horse. You know, it's like, where'd you get that bike guy? They're not just riding around that. I think free range bike. That's that's somebody's fucking bike. Yeah. Home run, bro. Um, all right. Let's see. This is from Avis. Hey, fellas. Long time $10 investor here. Is it garbage aware a neck brace for a couple days and hopes it helps with your neck pain? I mean, if you're self-prescribing a neck brace, I respect it. What is the main part? Is it to not move it or does it stretch it out? No, I have the new ones. I don't like. They're very plastic. I like this. The big donut. The phone, John. Yeah, the plastic ones look like your heads about the phone. Phone. Phone looks like a guy's strong out. Yeah, those those new ones. You're two seconds away from having those things in your head. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is with the erector set. Yeah. Halo. It's the external fixator. Man, this really limits head movement. Okay. I remember my mass teacher in seventh grade had the halo. No, a neck brace. Why? What happened? I don't know, dude, but I did not respect them. I filled money to the wrong people. The first day is school, dude. He's like, I'm Mr. So-and-so. I'm like, buddy, you get a glove getting the game. And then I have to like the second week he took you's a big fat guy To the second week he took it off and I was so nervous his head was going to fall off He is like turning calm collected kid. I'm like no one good near him Yeah, he ever explained it to you. I got a car accident or something like that. Yeah Because I'll tell you this probably like a vert you know vertebrae type there whatever fixes I don't know my mom my family we were very big on like we're somebody that would just throw in a neck brace without seeing the doctor Because we had a lot of like medical equipment around You know what I mean like crutches neck braces wheelchairs things like that ankle ankle monitors No, I saw dude. I saw a guy wearing an ankle monitor the other day had it hidden pretty good Yeah, and how he's just thinking somebody was like mouth and awful little bit where the fuck was I? Why wouldn't you wear it open so people know you don't not to fuck with you. He was a janitor somewhere He was pushing I fuck. I'm not gonna remember where I was and he was pushing a thing around and Somebody's got not gave him out of his just like and I'm just like ooh that seemed And then I spotted the monitor and then he was walking around screaming at someone on his phone I don't think that guys That guy's got fucking pro I guys live in a life. You don't fuck with older dudes like that. He's younger. Oh really, mm-hmm Interesting. Oh, I agree. Well, I'm not gonna be able to remember what do you see we see a janitor? I go to the one. What do I found a new mall you went to the mall again? I found I've got a new fancy mall Beautiful took the baby to fucking cheesecake factory for the first time. How you had that what do you get? Chicken parms sandwich. Did he french fries? No, do you give anything? No, he eats is I had a french fry probably a mind game a friend a little too salty. Huh, how do you like it? Yeah, but it's I think it's they were a little too I mean, that's like a fucking he's got a fresh clean palette. Do he's used to eating like fucking pure aid root vegetables? No kidding boom. Give him a little piece of cheesecake cheesecake. No, I think we had lunch. I think a cheesecake cheesecake factory Yeah, no, is he is he old enough to have ice cream yet? Uh, yeah, he's had like a little bit hazy. Uh-huh. Uh-huh I wasn't there. I was on the road to miss that out fucking absentee father Well flavor was it. I don't know. I wasn't there I'm gonna rub it in loser miss that. I was it was butter prickled. Mm-hmm rocky road Now I wasn't rocky road. I'm kidding. I was with you. I know dummy Um We had all that stuff so if something if something happened just get that thing and put it on you'd be all right Yeah, no, we were I mean also to my mom. I have it now We had a lot of those toilets too for some reason. We like one or two of those. You would like sit on like on a walker Yeah, whoa like the like you know, is that the poop over? That's so you don't have to spend all the way down D. Shit nothing probably both. Yeah, you pooping that whoa. Yeah, like you like bad It's like is that so you don't have to go all the way down? No, it's I think it's because you don't have to walk to the bedroom Put it right next to the bed to get out to your business and a bucket or whatever it isn't and I Know that's what I was doing with it. Um Wow yeah, my mom was always ever there's a lot of Not doctors, but a lot of medical professionals in my family a nurse is he met you know, fucking the working in the lab Yeah, that's what we have people working in lab down. I'm taking medical advice from a dental hygienist That's different. I know bad Dennis giving you medical advice. I think it'll be all right if you just whatever Dude's looking at my jaw catch when I was a kid. I told you that I Can't remember who the guy was when my mom showed the pet boys get y'all on a lift. Take a look at that thing my mom showed my Jockets to some guy Yeah, I don't know what you want to do with that info, but I've told you that before. Yeah, uh-huh I had a bad as a kid I think I was like a fucking Past around like a loose joint People who are not of people who saw that swans on you know wonder why you're fucked up I had jockets so bad when I was a kid. I know the guy's touching it. We're fucking rough it up like you to start chafing a little bit Six so many hands on it six. I got to read You aren't that fucking cleanser. They weren't that clean in the 80s Go and port the port No, I My mom at least knew the series of events and would go like do this You know what I mean like there wouldn't be like it'd be like you have to go to the ER. No Yeah, we were a big we were a big how to get the clean the wound hit it with a butterfly You ever hit it with a butterfly? Oh patty was big on butterflies Love a butterfly Keep that scar down a little vitamin E Vitamin E if we are a big vitamin E fam hit on with the vitamin E I love the way vitamin E smells sure cocoa butter to in a stick here. We got cocoa butter in a stick We had one we were not a cocoa butter. Is that right a pale Irish Catholic family? We were not into cocoa butter. No, we were into it Smells good too. We were big into a take a lick a horse hoof cream at one point. I would tell you that This stuff was getting past or I know it was for like utter it was for like cows otter Oh, I know what you're talking about everybody was using it. No, that's that was there might be two different things No, there was there was a whole cream. It was called like utterless or something like fabulous utter. It was hot for a while I remember getting stuff that was in I'm not gonna this is put it this way This stuff we got was in Tupperware. It was from like an industrial size Container got it from a farm and someone like my grandma would friend had it and would like give my remember It was a it was a Tupperware with a green lid and never seen Tupperware with a green lid and it had the little tab on it The oppressive popped open never seen that I said yeah, whoever whoever's fucking pedal on this hoof cream is making a pretty penny to be given It's tough away She ain't getting this Tupperware back to that. I'll take him. I launched a school in his job show and it's thing off in a parking lot Smells like hoof cream Peanut butter and hoof cream sandwich We weren't to pretty hands and feet for a while you ever use that shit. It was an exfoliant For dry skin on your elbows and your knees That's a big thing in the foley household had to have got to have good elbows back then minor bed Now I don't know why my that was always I scrubbed that elbows. Yeah, we used to use pretty hands and feet rubbed right off Skin great. I don't know what. Yeah. I'm gonna give me a picture, huh? Do you ever use an air or anything? No Do you ever use Eppel stop and epi stop and spray? Where do you see me using that just like to go smooth like skin just hairless? But he's a hairless kind of guy freak. Yeah, no I would use it on my I'm I'm my Jimmy John if like the burn wasn't bad for you know your testicles Is it I don't I can't be good for it. No wolf cream. I don't have My aunt used to air back in the day She would leave it on and come downstairs and like sit and watch TV why it was so much stash on all fucking brutal There was this dude worked out through the 90s. They ran as commercial for epi stop and spray Do you remember that or Apple Apple or epi stop and spray? It was like a sunscreen spray bottle and you'd spray it on and you'd wipe your hair right off And I'm gonna be like this shit is either. I don't know This is who made this the DuPonts. This is crazy. I don't be like there's no see if you can get that commercial It's dude it wipes off Insane, they just take a clean rag and just wipe a guy's leg hair straight off. It's it's nuts Apple stop and spray Are we allowed to show this? Yeah, we can show it Yeah, right. Look, fucking napalm sick get the fucking dude. It just deletes that guy's leg hair. How insane is that? It's a good thing to have the auto cuz you're the guy Yeah, run that again. I was insane Jesus Christ Just this is he's like he's cleaning the car That's nuts. That wasn't worse than 50 bucks in the sandwich that guy got paid for that ad Okay, still got skin damage from that. You know, he's not getting residuals on that even show his face silky smooth skin Yeah, right how nuts is that? Brazilian is what you got it though laser nah laser comes back It did when I was banging I worked in the laser hair removal industry for four years. I did I'm not you that I listen. I'm not saying you didn't I did. I'm not saying you didn't we use candela lasers Check it. Oh Jerry Yeah, Candela. We use candela laser hair removals and vericose vein removals And I was the driver. I would drive the technician and the machine to a Plastic surgeon's office. They would set up shop there for the day. I'd go out to the truck I have like a $40 lunch. I caught you know, totally that burn. Okay, listen to stern sleep Was awesome. I don't like 70 pounds. Yeah. Yeah, that's a benefit. That is a real life period for you when you when you get all comfy you get a couple of bucks in your pocket you get all comfy cozy and something You really blow the fucking doors off the fucking thing don't you guy You can bulk up Hey Russell Crowe does it all the time. Hey, well, you start bringing home Academy Awards and you do whatever the fuck you want One of the Academy Awards Australian ones he has Melvin's anyone to Melvin's am I he's got Academy award he does gladiator. He want it. We win Are you that me that's actor? He want best actor for that dude? What I'm not saying Did the show one time? Didn't they ask about them? I don't know His people did I didn't say they have to stop sending letters first of all, I'm not saying that you're not not saying no, I'm not dickhead All right, good Kevin is a known dickhead. We're all wearing a and uses apple soul Apple stop That's where my fucking hair line went. I got a got a tangle with that when I was nine years old messing around that shit Fuck should have been jerking over a normal kid Stayed trying to anyway first of all he deserved the Academy word for that. I'm not surprised at all I just didn't know you seem surprised. No, I'm not I just didn't know what would you what would you recall if that's not surprised What's that? What is that? I was surprised that I was I you're surprised. I was surprised that I didn't know that he got it Also your gut reaction was no What because Kippy said if you want a cadet I don't I'm just saying I mean the insider I give it to Gladier cleaned up. Yeah, I'm glad he's one of the greatest films ever. I know it is you knew Russell Crowe I did not say I knew him. I said I'm not saying listen. I want to get that kind of reputation. I love Russell Crowe and gladier don't give me wrong Who well the Academy of words that you said right fucking Bozo really good you Bozo best picture. Yeah Who what else who litters up against let me see It's pretty good set it up No, I was in that as the chick. Okay. I was one of what's his name's first first big films Russell Crowe. No, what's the kid's name. John Glenn Powell. Yeah, big movie star now big movie star So and you have gone on to bulk up you found another bulk in season part three. You're in you're in reruns What do you got Lucas we got crouching tiger hidden dragon air and Brock of it. Oh Traffic what that was best picture movies you have a best actor Javier Bardem before night falls cast away What cast away he took out cast away. Damn. This went move it. This went Hollywood was good. That's crazy Imagine those two movies going up against each other. You don't even get one of those every five years traffic cast away Gladiator Aaron Brock of it's in the same year. What was it? Yeah, you also had almost famous Yeah, man Billy Elliot People are running out to see Jay. Oh brother where it's now break. No, get the fuck out of here. They were not all the same year That's insane man You're the you doubted the crow you doubted the crow. I didn't mean to doubt It's okay. I'll talk to him. Maybe I can smooth things over for you get a little say in his neck He likes to put on a couple of pounds in between projects. Sure. He's earned it. That's all I was saying. Yeah, I haven't I Can't have a sandwich What's your problem is not a sandwich? Okay Can't what's like about time As you know, baby life comes at you pretty quick. You ain't lying big man start adding up Uh-huh, you know what I'm saying. I wish I could go back and tell my younger self if you're gonna do a little banking Make sure you save your money. Make sure you do it right watch out for bank fees all that kind of stuff I'll tell you what I really wish I could go back and say hey, I wish I had joined I know listen if you if you're out there. This is where time comes in time is changing the way people bank It's hard and listen. It's hard enough to keep a buck as it is then you got these big corporate banks coming after you Overdraft fees overdraft fee monthly statement got it. Oh oh five five dollars for this $10 right they got their hand in your pocket Not with time chime offers the most rewarding fee free banking all with no overdraft fees no monthly fees no minimum balances You get 5% cash back on the chime card and a category your choice like gas or groceries all while building credit through regular every day spending And if you're ever in a pinch spot me let you overdraft up to $200 be free look at that. I know I need that dog Right now you can join the millions that are already banking fee free with America's number one choice for banking Head to chime.com/garbage that's chime.com/garbage sign up now. It only takes a few minutes do it Chime is a fintech not a bank banking services and chime card provided by Chimes bank partners Qualifying direct deposits required terms and limits apply go to chime.com/disclosures for details. All right, let's see here um This one's from Joey the lips great names pretty good. Has anyone you know ever renewed their vows? Damn dude, that's a home run. I always thought someone cheated on someone than that happened That's the only time I go what the hell you read this shit. I've ever heard of my life. Uh-huh I've only ever known the dirt baggiest of dirt baggies to do that I don't know what you'd have to do in my family to be like we're renewing our vows We want that was only shit. You saw like sitcoms or something. It was a bad sitcom plot I ain't never seen that in real life. What's that? It's gotta be something Something had to happen To me it was always like we were about to get separated and we decided to not I don't know So we're renewing our vows. We're gonna renew everybody to see this one more time Fucking dog and booty show you got going on here. Yeah, it's always bad Like 50-year-old people do it 65-year-old people do Yeah, yeah, which as you know, I do a lot of material on this not later in life weddings. Sure. Have you seen these things? Well man, I get maybe like uh, if it is if you're doing it with like fuck that I ain't going man I'm you dragging me after some fucking hotel on a Wednesday. How are people? This is what I'm saying. Dude is shit. I don't think people are inviting Extended people don't not send an out of mutations. I would assume it's like Hey me and your mother your close brother sister whatever, you know like you're like Hey, I'm gonna have hey they would to me would be the same people of like hey We're having a cookout on Sunday come over Like that kind of school it'd be like you your mom your brother You're me and an uncle cousins like the tight. Well, who's good? Who's getting married? No one's getting married you're renewing your vow. Who is whoever? I'm just saying say you're fucking your cousin wanted to it would be the The 20-person circle would get the invite the tights ten would show up. Yeah, that's what I'm saying I don't think it's like they're not sending you're not you know people from working get invited and shit. I ain't going. I'll pay that much Um, you've never heard of anything like that in your neck of the woods, right? No, but I feel like to my end of it is always like rich people doing it big Really? Yeah, like but like still more intimate not like wedding size But like oh, we're filing the whole family out to like Turks and Kiko's and doing it there. Have you done that? Have you seen that? No, never I've never I it's I only like TV shows. Yeah, that's I mean I don't know what it would take For Denise. Where did they do it on a fresh prince? Did they read it? Most to every sitcom at some point when that's the only reason I know it I always thought your dad did it when he went when you went to Vegas and the boy got it. That was a marriage That was a wedding that me and Texas hold on Shout out to minions I shot a loyal Brunson That was that I'm not gonna lie that felt that wedding and my dad's second marriage in you were you went to it too, right? Yeah, my little brother was the ring bear and I felt that was I was jealous. I think that's this kid's fucking killing it How did people shout out Michael um It was me my brother my sister did not go that was ultimately Listen Chicken sandwiches she threw a party that weekend that my dad's house sick Um, oh, that's awesome Now my dad's in Vegas got mad. I don't know why my sister's a dumb bitch I would have done the same thing. Um, I think it was like after a dance like you know It's like a high school dancer somewhere prom something like that maybe that couldn't have been called had to be high school They took pictures disposable camera. She left the pictures in like her drawer at my dad's My little brother Was like I mean he was like four or whatever. It was just like Found them in her room came down I was like here's pictures of all these kids party in a house. That was a first real split in the was your dad's first big fight What was he pissed? I was naive. He was not you for its stories. He was not happy um But that wedding it was me my brother Me my two brothers me Danny Michael Matthew wasn't born yet Michael was I remember he's like me and Audrey are getting married. He sat me down same sit down. I was like this is Man anytime you get sat down in the family the living room you jammed out things aren't going great He goes we're gonna he was like told me it was like this big load off his chest. He's like We're gonna get married. Is that okay? I'm like I got a four-year-old brother. You guys have been you guys bought a house together. What the fine be weird if you didn't guy Yeah, you check it in with me now. Yeah. I'm like you own a business together. What the fuck you talking about And now you're checking, you're taking a temperature on this. (laughing) A little pot committed at this point to bring up your poker analogy. - They're repoing the car right now. - This is pulling out of the driveway. - I love her, man. - Yeah, so it was me. - What'd you say? - I remember being like, I just want, yeah, like this is, that's paperwork at this point, buddy. They're fucking, you're in it. - He asked me this at dinner time. - Drop this shit on me. - I gotta fucking map this to no more. - I was 10, that was probably 13, something like that. - Yeah, so my dad's, business partner Sam and his wife. - Ooh. - It's rough squad. - Dude, Sam, shout out Sam. He was an older black guy from North Carolina, South Carolina. He had Sam's secrets. So I told you he used to put that shit on hot dogs. I blew my fucking hair back. I remember him going, you think you like hot dogs? - Yeah, I love hot dogs. - Wait, do you see this shit? - He'd come over to my dad's house and grill for the big barbecue. - Man. - That was the first time I've seen a jar of an undescript unlabeled jar of sauce. And he was painting his, he might as well have to fucking, a paint roller to put that shit on the food. - But yeah, them two, I want to say that, my dad, my, she didn't have somebody, right? - She had her parents, I can probably get the, I can't show the picture. - Of course. - I think her brother. - But she went, I bet she was wearing a headband. - Wait a minute, you know what I mean? - Like a band, that, she's not an old lady. It wasn't a patch over. - No, I'm saying like, you know, sometimes brides. - Sure, like the, yeah, no. - No, no, she had a nice dress, is that the Bellagio and it just opened? I remember being like, I remember telling people at school. - Dad's getting a Bellagio. - And I remember, and then I remember not being that classy. - You got the guy you moved in the middle of the night with? (laughing) - Yeah, we're doing all right. That thing's gonna matter here, you believe that. - He ran it by me, I said, you know. - I gave it to you, okay. - No, they, what was I saying? - Brought wedding. - Well, as I fucking say. - You saying the guy with the hot dogs? - No, you should not say him. - The first conversion van I had seen too. Let us borrow that to go to Toronto. - Man, this is real high dollar stuff, right? - Thank you. - Hot dog spread and fucking conversion van. - The Montreal. - No, that was, me realizing it wasn't fancy. Now this is funny, like I've never looked at it. - Would you eat dinner, I always forget. What'd you do for dinner after? - Oh, I don't think me, I think the parents, I think the adults went out and me, Danny, my younger brother went and sat in the hotel room and my baby sat my younger brother. That's what, I remember that vividly. - Do you have some of the hot dog sauce? - They're drinkin' it. - I'm orderin' room service. - I put it on the grilled cheese and shit. - Taking a sip of the tank. - Get you in the back of the mouth. - He has get it, it's rather hot. - I'm tellin' the bell hop. It's not anything. - Yeah, no, they went out to play the tables or somethin'. And, but it is, I remember going, I remember thinking I was like at the Bellagio fancy Vegas. Vegas to me was fancy at that time. - You are fucking drunk. - And I remember when I realized it wasn't fancy, we had to wait for another couple to finish their wedding so we could go in. And there was people, we were like in line. There was people behind us. - And me going, oh, I thought we were the only ones gettin' married at the Bellagio. - You sure? - I thought, you know, we were so happy. - You shut the joint down. - Yeah, I thought it was like-- - The fucking room of our floor rooms. - Yeah. - Private plane. - Nah, yeah. - Shit. - High roller shit. - Yeah, no, this was, this was tangy. - Presidential. - Oh, yeah. This was where baby sittin' we, you know. - Barbeque sauce and a green tupperware. - Yeah. - There was green at the waiting lot. - Yeah, we had a way. - And we stood in like a single file line. - Oh man, I had to put that hoof cream on his nuts after all that. - Paul Sparks, why you like that? - Yeah, that's second wedding shit. - The party was like 15, 20 people. - Why didn't go to the party? - No, like just your whole group. - Oh, yeah, man. Yeah, probably that. Probably that. I don't think my, like our good family friends were there. Yeah, I think it was just that 'cause I remember just me and Danny running around the casino. So yeah, renewing your wedding vows. That's trash. But God loves you. - Yeah, someone's gotta do it. - Yeah. All right, let's see here. This one's from Chris, $10 general counsel here. - Great name. - Good name. - You's ever been so jammed up, you swapped the driver's side and passenger side wiper blades. After you notice the driver's side is coming apart and the passenger side seems to have way less wear on it. I've never thought of that. That's brilliant. That's really good. But I've been to that such wiper blades, man. - I didn't get 'em. - They go quick. - I don't get it. - You got a good pair or the ones on my card suck. Just all of a sudden, you get that film and you can't get the frost right. - Is that on the inside? - I think that's on the inside. - I think it has to do with both. One affects the other. 'Cause if you're too hot in the inside, it's gonna streak no matter what. - Yeah, I don't know. It's one thing I remember at one point, having a pretty good understanding of the best thing of circle the air in or pull it in from it. You know how you have that? You can be like, "Let's recycle it." Or let's bring it in new intake. And the best time for the rain and the heat, if it's cold out and it's hot. - I'm never in it. - I don't know it anymore. - I'm never in a constant in the car. I'm always playing defense. - Hot or cold? - Yeah, I'm like, you're constantly adjusting it. - And you know some people? You know, fucks me up when people close the vents and you don't realize it. - I think you start cooking on the driver's side or whatever. - I know somebody that would close the vents. - Luke? - No. - Okay. - But that was unheard of in my family. That's like fucking stealing the flu. Closing the vents. - What's your take on this? I was in the back of an Uber with Luke yesterday. - Yeah. - Big Uber, right? Large Uber. - They got the dials in the back that you can control it. - Yeah. - Luke was a little hot or a little cold? - Hot. - Luke was a little hot. And he's like dabbling with it. I guess he can't figure out the controls. Then he asked the driver. Can you turn the air down? I'm like, he asked the driver when he's got full command center. - You know what he was doing? - No. - Was it locked? - He didn't have the AC on. So I'm just getting air. - You can't turn the AC on in the back? - No. - He had the AC control on the top. - Yeah. I'll give him that. - Okay, I didn't know that. - I didn't know that. Thank you, Hunter. - You're welcome. (laughs) - Got that. (laughs) - Place him with AI. - What are you gonna do with him? - What? - He's like, you know. He expecting him to. - I don't know. Yeah, it was just. I saw him fumble with him. - He's a child of comfort. He doesn't know anything but. He doesn't know anything but to ask. Kind of spot on. - Gimme me. - Gimme me. Cheers. - He also took us to the wrong location. - Nice. - Brood. - I didn't yell at him. - Nice. - I don't yell at him. - Yeah. - Okay, I've ever yelled at Luke. - I've been stern with him once again. - I've never yelled at Luke. - Yeah, yeah. - No, I have never yelled at him. - I've never yelled at him. I give you. I have never yelled at him. - When have I yelled at you? You've yelled at me. - Yeah, I have yelled at you. - Several times. - Yeah, several times. - L.A., you really yelled at him. - I really yelled at him. - No. Or you yelled at me in L.A. And I know where. - He really gave it to me, too. - But I've been turned on. - That's unfortunately how you get your rocks off. - Brat correction. - Whoa. - What Brat correction? - Yeah. - It's a kink. - Is that what you-- - Ooh, send me a link on that. Send me a full wiki breakdown. - Brat correction. - Yeah, you're being a brassy. You get fucking slapped around a little bit. - No, I don't like that. - Yeah, you do. - Well, freak. - No, I don't like watching that. - No, you like me looking slapped, though. - Bratty, stepdaughter, stepfather. I mean, you know. Imagine you're the stepdaughter. - Whatever, will we talk about that? - I don't know, you brought it up. - Fucking creep. - You're a creep. - I don't watch that shit. - What did you do? - Nope. - I know. I go to the Lord. - It's so funny when you like adamantly deny something that like you clearly-- - I like stepdaughter, stepdad, stuff with the fuck. What am I, jerk off? - No, no one said-- First of all, you just said you don't watch that stuff. I don't know what you're doing. You're the king of bringing something up and then going on, I'll do that. It's like, well, no one fucking said it. More than 11. - Episol, ladies and gentlemen. Episol. - Epi-stop and spray. - Uh-huh. This one's from Joe, Joe Garbaggio here. $10 shareholder. Dividend Jews for poor life choices. Respect that. Is it a dirt bag move? Is it garbage to take all but one debit card out of your wallet? That way, when you're at the cashier and you're not sure if it's going to work, you can rifle through and go, "Ah, I think my wife took my other card. This is all I got." - Like it. - Jammed up but trying to play it cool. I like that. That's a pretty good defense mechanism. I guess I might have done it. I don't have my wallet on me. I only have this card. I might have done that once or twice. - I do something similar where I keep a bunch of old debit cards or credit cards in my wallet. So if it doesn't go through, I can-- Oh, shit, I don't know. But then it just looks like you all. Those cards don't work because then one of those I should work I say their old one. I fucking forgot the wrong one Let me show you no, I get it. I don't get what you what you what if you go Oh, I want to know that I've had cards before okay, but you don't have any money. No You know, I don't know which one this is I think this is an old work one and it gives me more of a story I have more of a more props to play with I got tonight yesterday if I'm being honest. I went I got a haircut and they You go to any of these places. I've never been to this place. I give my number. They go can we have your phone though? Hey, I already cut my hair also think I washed my hair. I'm like I'm okay. He's like No, it's potted. It's not the price. It's not the price the same price ago. I like it my hair wash I know but we were in a rush. We were doing stuff yesterday, and I'm like I popped in I'm like It's more of a time thing. He's like well, dude in a rush. I'm like yeah, it's fucking noon on a Tuesday. We're working here Issue content. I love that feeling. It's nice going back in that sink in the warm water running over your head Yeah, but this guy very this guy's name was Eli. It's sensual. And this guy's name was he dude. He is I would say it's What's the word went in the in the erotic in the womb in Euro? Yeah Get that vibe you wait You got memories from in there. No, but I'm just saying it feels good. Like you're they feels like you're in the womb The warm water running over your ears and like yeah, yeah, yeah I get you. Yeah, sure. I get that it's it's it's a little Too sensual for me huh Uh-huh, I'd rather be doing a lot of other. I don't need my hair washed Yeah, I get I get I like it if a hot broader the fucking knockers are jiggling in my face. Jesus. What's going Eli? His knockers were in the Hey, how long you been living in this city? It's like get knock it off. I'm hard. All right But it got the night she goes, okay, I give her my phone number and I don't know how the fuck this happens Can we use the fucking am x ending in 1 0 0 4 and I go I guess and that is a number that I kind of remember and I go The number we have on fire. Yeah, I get how the fuck you got my have you been there before? No, that's weird, but I think they're Like Dave I think a lot of them have linked up or like if it's like a toast type thing if you go if you like toast has Your information if you signed up on what the fuck your shit. This everywhere in yeah, yeah You're I mean, which I'm fine with but I go. Yeah, I guess then she goes, okay, you're all said I'd already tipped I already tipped Eli mm-hmm boom hit him with a dub before I even went over I said that's for you the news is like I like a place where you go and he rings you up He cut your head and goes over and he's like he hits a cash register that doesn't have a screen He's like it's gonna be 32, but whatever you go here you go And I grease him on top of the total sure I like doing that but I saw this wasn't one of those places They had some some broad at the front desk with a bunch of computers and laptop shampoo So I tipped him right away that I went over to pay because it was gonna be two separate trains Act I get denied so I pay and I walk away. I'm getting all my stuff She goes Kevin this didn't go through and now there's like a couple of like heavy hit like you know rich-looking guy Now I'm embarrassed and I go, but you didn't I didn't even know where that card what now you're just like No, you just look like an idiot. You can't I was like I think that's an old card I don't even know that number blah blah blah blah blah blah blah yeah, huh. I put it on the company card I had to show that I had an I had to show that I had money so I like held up the amx. I'm like well my amx platinum work It's not the name. Oh, we were shooting content that day. I needed it. I was hair and makeup of course. That's what I'm telling That's a fresh haircut. Yeah, when did you get it? 24 hours ago really talk to Eli huh, uh-huh looks good because it doesn't look like you just got a haircut No, I'll give you that it doesn't which I knew I normally wear a bad hair. I know I wear a hair cut bad for three days It stinks. I know it's I'd say it's I'm jammed up. What do you want from me stink think about plugs? Huh? No, you don't need plugs shark hit me Sleep with the weight is it's fine. I get plugs. I'm 40 married wife kid. Are you 40? I'm gonna be 40 in a couple of months. Oh shit. You get me It's in August, right? It's a decent haircut. I hate them. I Get you something nice for your 40th birthday like what I don't know. What do you get a dickhead like you though? Bitch about everything. You don't like nothing. Remember when you were in the records for a minute I still am. I just bought a record not that long ago Why don't you like what record um Bob Newhart I bought it Bob Newhart. Yeah, the comedian. Yeah, that was like eight months ago. That was maybe Eight weeks ago. Listen to it. No So what's that mean? I don't know. You don't use the record player. I do use the record player I just on for I play my I play Billy Joel constantly for me and the baby when we're in the burbs Constantly on the record music is supposedly you can feel the record not the stranger more than He's supposed to be like classical music. No, no, no, you feel the music. You went up town right in in you. It is for sure the stranger Um But uh, yeah, they can feel they're supposed to be able to feel the music more than digital like on uh The pop to crackle you feel it in your body. So I play for him and we dance But at least fully for what it skips in the same place Wait a scratch record. Yeah, a scratch record. It's also probably from the fucking 80s. Huh? I'm not buying new Billy Joel records. I don't think they make him. Yeah, it's my pretty new Wax and new print wax Anywho pressing but yeah, maybe give me a record. That'd be nice now Get you dinner somewhere or something. I'm alright. You don't want your birthday dinners are No, I'm not gonna go with you. I'll get you a gift card. So I would you go with your friend You don't think I like me a gift card. Yeah, that's you don't get a guy you like a gift card That's what you you don't you go you don't think I like you'll get your gift card or something I'll get a gift card use a little bit of it. Yeah, it's 32 84 on air I already know what I'm getting. Yeah, what I've been talking about it The lies my god the lot look at my right or wrong. You're all you fucking piece This is why Can't fucking just back me up once You were you you called out my it doesn't matter this episode. It doesn't matter Calling out my childhood comforts as this episode. You turn out turn out a guy in a conversation. You'll burn a bridge Get made he came across the bridge. It's insane. I don't I like I'll never I expect that and then you kind of like it That he fucking no, I don't just this. I don't This will be going right that shows a lot. I burn you then you don't burn me back then you got a friend for life The age fully school school of fucking diabolical behavior ladies. I we gotta wrap it up Gang I'm gonna take this right now you forget all that forget all that we love Forget it kind of pornography I watch I ignore lies yourself gang. We love you to death. We'll see you next week. Who