ADRIAN DUGGAN

[Music] Welcome to Puzzvi Podcast. A podcast for people living with HIV, their friends, family, and allies. We are so glad you could join us. Here are your hosts, Veda and Robbie. Veda, we are back on the Puzzvi Podcast. How are you doing? I'm good. We're back in our original breeding grounds at the podcast studio. This is where we first recorded on "How to Tell a Secret". It's wild, isn't it? I've seen the movie around 18 times, and every time I see the scene, I'm just like, "Ooh!" And you still jealous. You still show on the Puzzvi Podcast. Just kidding, babes. But it's always a nice feeling when we come back here. So much has happened since the middle of 2021. And we've just talked to so many amazing people over the years, haven't we? Yes. And today we also have a very special person, don't we? It's great because we're local and we're here with a local. Yes, yes. I'm not known. Can I bring in a gorgeous, gorgeous agent, Dukin? How are you doing, Adrian? I'm good. Thanks. I'm good. I'm feeling the Puzz vibes. Yes, welcome to the Puzzvi Tribe. Thank you. Thank you very much. You've been feeling the Puzz vibes for a while. For a while. You've been part of Tribe. Yeah, for like three years, precisely. Well, a little over three years. Yes, and you're quite young. You're 20. Yeah, I'm 20. So three years makes you 17. Yeah, I was 17 when I first diagnosed HIV positive. So, do you want to share what our listeners and watchers a little bit more about your story? Yeah, okay. Well, so yeah, I was 17 when I was first diagnosed HIV positive. I was in secondary school, I was in fifth year. And it was just before the the major COVID lockdown. I basically had gone to get a test in my local GP. Funnily enough, I had actually gotten a test because I had previously gotten to Plymouthia. And I needed to get a confirmation test to make sure that it was the antibiotics that worked. And the doctor was like, oh, there's no need to do a blood test. We'll just do the swelves. And I was like, no, maybe we should do the blood test. You know, it's always good to do it. And then sure enough, a week later, I was getting all these calls and school and I was like, oh, Jesus, what is this? And I kind of thought then I was like, oh, well, it's, she wants to call me my doctor. So it's, it's something serious. And yeah, so I went up and she told me and yeah, it's kind of been, it's been a busy time since then, but no, like, yeah, then I kind of, I suddenly had all these questions like, I'm gonna tell my family. What does this mean for me? Yeah. Can I bring you back into the room when she diagnosed you because you were very young. Oh yeah. She didn't even want to do the blood test on you. How was she? You just. We were very diagnosive at birth. Yeah. It was a crazy day. It was, it was actually my dad's birthday, which made things worse. And it was the Monday and I was in school and we're not like allowed our phones in class from back in secondary schools. So my phone was in my locker and I had all these missed calls from the GP and. So you were in sixth year, you weren't even in college? Fifth year. Fifth year, okay. I know, yeah, so I had all these missed calls and I was like, oh, Jesus. And then I didn't get to ring her back till the end of the day and I got the bus home. So, my dad and my sister, they were off doing something else that day. So I had to kind of. She asked me, she called me, she was like, come up to the clinic. We need to talk about your results. And then I was like, okay, well shit, I was like, I can walk up to the clinic. Mind you, it was like, well, ashing out. So I was like, oh, Jesus, I'm gonna get soaked. But um. You're like, oh no, my hair! Yeah, literally. That was my main concern. Now what was coming next? No. But yeah, I was like, do I get the bus home or do I go up and talk to my doctor because of the scenes kind of urgent? So I walked up anyways and. And yeah, I went to the office and I think it was like the last person there because they were about to close. But obviously it being quite urgent she wanted to talk to me and she brought me in and she's like, Adrian, she's like, what I'm gonna say might sound a bit shocking. But like it's really not a big deal. She was kind of praying to me and she was like, your test came back. You are. she said your HIV reactive because then she explained what that meant because she was like, this is the first test. You're gonna have to do another test in case it was like, you know, a false negative or something. And no, she was very good though. Like she's been my family doctor for like ages and she explained that really isn't a big deal that their medications and all that. But I found that you're such shocking news at the start. You don't even listen to that. You know, you just kind of, you're like, oh shit. And then I was like, obviously I started crying. And I was like, how the fuck am I gonna get home because I missed my bus. And I was like, I'm gonna have to call a neighbor. Then I'm gonna have to explain this. What's happening? And she was actually really speechless. Like, Adrian, how are you getting home? And I was like, I don't know, I missed my bus. She's like, I'll drive you home. So she drove me home and she's like, just go to the pharmacy. Here's a prescription for the annex. Take that. So your appointment on Thursday, the jams is. She also said, you know, like, you're probably gonna have to tell your dad because you have to get up to jams and that's really important. So I was like, okay, that wasn't my main concern that that minute because it was dad's birthday. And I had to kind of like, I was like, I'm not gonna attach that to his birthday because like, it's pants I relax, but it's, you know, so yeah. Yeah, so that was that was the day that I was diagnosed HIV positive, I guess. And did you know anything about HIV? Do you think young people? Honestly, oh, it was crazy. Like, you know, it was something we would have heard about really, but it was never really covered. Like, I had no sex education in secondary school around like that. So yeah, no, like, you know, it was kind of what you just pick up in movies. It was actually kind of funny though because in secondary school, we were preparing for the leaving sir. And in English, we had like, it's like the infamous comparative study where you've got like three texts, usually one of them is a movie and you have to compare all three. And one of the pieces was a movie called Pride. It's, you know, it's the story about in the UK how it's Graham. It's a great movie. I love it. Yeah, I love it. But, um, obviously the main character is diagnosed with having HIV positive and then consequently dies. And from me, it's, and that was really the only exposure I suppose we would have had, you know, now obviously, I listened to the doctor, you know, when she said there are treatments. It's not the end of the world. But I think not hearing about it as a young person, and particularly living in the countryside, you know, not only was I like just, you know, a young person and young people aren't really, you know, told anything about sex, but then like, as a young queer person, no one talks about like, you know, back that, you know, like the queer lifestyle, it's not a lifestyle, but the queer, you know, what is a lifestyle, man? Yeah, I chose that. I chose this. But yeah, so you went back and with your dad's birthday, you made a lovely wish. When did you tell him? Because you have to get his permission to go to James' at that age or? No, so I think, um, where the regulations work when it comes to, um, any medical treatments is like once you're 17, I think you're actually classified as an adult, so, um, that wasn't very concerned, but I think it was like just kind of getting up there. Um, uh, but yeah, no, like, I mean, I told him, I think it was, it was the Wednesday. So that was the Monday I got the test done. Um, I didn't tell him on the Tuesday, and then I told him on the Wednesday, and then I went up on the Thursday. So yeah, it was, it was a shock for him too. Uh, you know, I think, like to, I suppose, put some context on it, you know, like he would have been in his 20s during the 80s, and he was, he was like living in New York, and yeah, so his perception of what HIV was was very different to like what it is now, you know, um, and then obviously, you know, he's raising quite a Catholic family where like, you don't talk about sex, and I also think, you know, I've been out as gay since I was 14, but I think that, you know, for parents, that can kind of be easy to accept until they realize you're actually having sex, you know, it's like, oh, wait, he actually is gay and he's having sex with men, and like that's, yeah, it is, it is, I mean, he's much better with a knife, and like, I'm very privileged to have that, you know, not everyone does. What's his name, sweetie? His name's Pat. Hi Pat. Yeah, Pat. We love loving and supporting families, members, and the podcast, positive eye podcast. I forgot to name my podcast, Vader, what am I like? I'm so like, entrawled into this story. It's the mascara. It is. I draw me in. So, how did you find your feet after this diagnosis for such a long time? Okay, so it's been, it's been a kind of, I don't want to say a long journey, but it's definitely taken its time. It wasn't, I didn't wake up one morning saying, oh, it's fine, you know, but yeah, I suppose it probably starts it off at the guy clinic the first time went up and it was obviously you know I was so nervous going up and so like anxious I remember when I got my blood pressure done the first blood first blood I remember I broke out and like the heat rash and like I got my blood pressure done and it was like really really high and I think I was like shaking too like Jesus the nurse looked at me and she was like this poor guy and then like you know once you explained everything and it was like in such a kind of casual way that like it really I suppose can't be done you know like hear this nurse while I was talking about HIV so casually and I remember she said like she's like I know doesn't feel like in there but you're gonna be having sex like like going for like it's not gonna end your sex life and like just like being really reassuring not that that was my main concern but like it wasn't my main concern and she was saying like listen you're gonna be gram to kind of thing and yeah that was I suppose the first step in in realizing that like what it seemed like in my head wasn't really what the case is you know this day and age so yeah that was my the first kind of kind of getting accepting that like I have HIV you know and then from there I suppose it's just I kind of realized that you know no one's really talking about it and I hadn't discovered you guys yet and well actually that being said I had been to which events days and all the tricks of our yeah all the twinkles come out at nine I wouldn't miss it for the world but no you know Veda was is very like passionate about talking about HIV on stage and you equals you and everything and so like that also helps and it's a little things and then and then one of the nurses in James is like me with a guy who was diagnosed similar at my age but like he'd you know you know on his HIV journey a lot longer and I got talking to him and you know he was just so like sex positive and like ending the stigma and everything and I kind of really was in awe of it because I was like you know this is great someone can have this outlook and yeah I kind of just went from there and then you know senior podcast and yeah it just kind of like I'm being part of the movement yourself yeah well and you're also a nursing student yeah did get in HIV inform what you wanted to do in the future or like was nursing always on your mind um I think it always was my mind but I do think it might have pushed me a little further towards nursing um and I think that was just like for my own experience of you know like being as opposed a patient or a service user and being so scared and having like the nurse be the one to like the first point of contact and like really explaining things and yeah it really kind of influenced maybe what I would want to do you know and then obviously like wow yeah so I love that like that nurse model something for you absolutely and that you took it on yeah I think you're gonna be great yeah thank you really gonna be great addition to the tribe do what are people in your nursing class know about your status and what did he think yeah um so I suppose I didn't really tell anyone until um just a bit of context and tell anyone until like really last year I told my family and maybe a couple of close friends whatever um you tell me and I tell the George yeah that's true but no that was that was lovely but it doesn't sound as bad as we agreed it we agreed on it it was it was eve of world AIDS day right it was it was and yeah I suppose leading up to world AIDS day of last year I really wanted to just I kind of become a sick of feeling like I was hiding it and I don't you know like I wasn't I'm not sure if like keeping it secret is the proper way to say it because if someone asked me I would have said yeah I am HIV positive but I noticed that there was that uncomfortable uncomfortable I guess around it you know and I wanted to challenge that because I felt like I shouldn't be uncomfortable about being HIV positive you know and yeah so I was focusing on making a post on social media for world AIDS day and before I did that I I brought on my nursing friends my little group into a room we were studying for exams and I just wanted to tell them because um oh nice I felt a bit of safety in it you know like they're all my really close friends I kind of knew they wouldn't judge me but you know more than that it wasn't that they didn't even judge me they went further than they showed support for me and that makes such a difference you know so their tears they're there there was on my part they're always this though if you like me too yeah I love a good cry I wish I could cry I wish you could cry too I just look from the far look so pretty when you're emotional yeah what was what inside of it you just on the perceived end of a you came out also in a GCN article yes am I correct and on Instagram yes and how was that were you terrified beforehand or what was your response like also yeah um so I spoke to the GCN article um I literally just sent the article by email and I wasn't expecting to post it at all um let's like I'll send it anyways and see does anything happen and I got an email like your nudes yeah they're out there for everyone just the Mr. Charden though five six six a month yeah the dollar conversion rate and only fans getting to about this time no but uh yeah I put it on GCN and they got back to me really quickly and they posted it and um and yeah that was really nice I was really exciting I guess just seeing something that I had wrote on like a publication I guess and then for the social media post yeah I did that on World Aid's Day and I got a really good response like yeah I think all but like one person it was a really good response like everyone was so supportive and yeah I was really glad I did this it was funny though because I don't focus on the one bad bad response but like um I'll talk about it because I suppose it kind of there's a lesson to be learned there and in the sense that basically before I was kind of open about being HIV positive you know like obviously being in college I'd went on like this date with this guy and um date kind of turned into a hookup so like we went on a date it was lovely he came back to my um stuff happened etc etc and anyways um and we didn't use the condom and uh we didn't like you know we didn't even have a conversation about like say sex which you know to be honest probably should have led that but anyways it's on both people I think but didn't happen and you know what we're not gonna shame it but anyways um everything was fine and you know obviously you know I got tested after that um you know like I try to get tested regularly but that was just for my own sake and um yeah and then when I noticed when like I did come out there being HIV positive uh he did he certainly attacks me he was like oh that's great but then he wanted to he was like when when were you HIV positive and I was like oh like did you read the article like it says it in there you know it's like I think it was like three years ago and then he was like oh so you were HIV positive when we hooked up and I was like yeah and so like you know I was undetectable and that's the thing you know um if you're undetectable you can't transmit HIV and um and yeah and you know like I think you know being so young too it's like you have to kind of navigate well I do you disclose it to people and it's a lot easier for me now because I'm so open about it you know it's right there on my Instagram you know whatever um but it is a lot of pressure and it's not like you know he even asked you know and I find it is easier when someone asks so what's your status because they're starting the conversation and it comes from a supposed sounds like it's coming from an informed place so you kind of think they're not gonna judge you but yeah I just really felt like he was kind of like interrogating me almost like to see if he had a risk of having HIV and I was like what the fuck you know kind of like yeah so do you feel like as a young person or just a person living with HIV that you have now got some sort of obligation to educate people about sex and STI I I feel like I don't feel like there's an obligation on myself but I do feel like others feel there's an obligation or I'm the go-to person to go and ask questions not even just about HIV but about like you know other STIs um and whatever and people have sent me pictures of they're like very lumpy penis pain what's this like is this gentle words I'm really like herpes words oh god I was like just go to the doctor pet your grand so yeah expect one right crispy looks like yeah like a pulse like why is the green and either way go to the doctor yeah um I'm like I'm happy we talk about one negative thing because under your, but underneath your Instagram post is like 118 comments Of course, you're an author, love and support and I know we do tend to concentrate on the one bad ones because that's Lorsers That was me Yeah, thank you very much Thank you very much, bro But the overriding message is of love and support and I think there's so many parallels between yourself and our previous guests And the Puzzvede podcast, if you're coming, she's unrecently, she's also ennourished and she's young, 20, she's 27 or 24 when she was diagnosed with HIV And she recently came out on Instagram to a via the Puzzvede podcast and she, I asked her, "Hey, what are you getting on?" And she's like, "Rabbi, every single person in my life has been noting but incredible." Isn't that amazing? Yeah, it's great You hear that every one I think if you're at home listening to us, I know there's quite a few of you who are still in the closet about your status, which is fine, but I just want you to let that sink in It's been amazing to see you for flourish just in the last few days, we hear from her all the time and she's so activated and excited Just like Agent Puzz Norse is going to take over our gig Oh yeah Come for it Well, I've got uniforms for us Yeah, we've got a sex with her Well, also, we may get those one bad comments or two bad comments and yes, we have to be paraphroned them but you have a whole community behind your back And you have that was 118 people behind your back Oh yeah, and you know, it is funny when beta mentions like when I came out of the George and like, it is such an empowering feeling and you can't have asked yourself Why was I like so worried, you know, because it is like you see an entire community there who kind of rally behind you and yeah, it's really nice I'm so happy to celebrate you Yeah, so happy to meet you I love that night because everything we do around the world is day, we put so much heart into it and you were just like the cherry on the cake for me You know, we had just met, we hadn't physically met, and it's very delicious throughout my arms around you on the eve of you coming out like that and introduce you to so many other people who are living with HIV I'm a very lucky girl really And Agent, I hope you don't mind but when I go around to schools, there's normally 15-6 years and to talk about HIV, I have a link up to your GCN article I'm just like, you know, don't think that HIV is not a view that older people, but it can happen to us all, you know, there's someone in secondary school, you forgot it And then, and they don't even think they can get an oral STI, let alone HIV, it's all about pregnancy and stopping that, you know So, and also just your story is just, it's helping inform the next generation too Oh, I'm, I'm not abusing your story, I'm using your story I'm sharing all these ways, you're holding on to me, I don't know if you're having a lot of fun, be warned, block a month's Twitter I don't think they're safe for sure, let alone work How is dating life? How is navigating sexual life as a young 20-year-old? Well, honestly, my sex life is pretty boring at the minute, but no, it's actually, it is fine I don't know, I think Grindr is the main thing that everyone uses and I think it's like, that's where it's at, but I'm not seeing anyone at the minute, I'm single And I'm happy to be single, yeah, but like, no, I feel like, you know, what I do like about Grindr is, obviously, you know, you can put your status up there It's really good, easier, and like, it's the same with Instagram as well, like I said, you know, I kind of do that preemptively, because then it stops questions, well, it stops those questions being asked, but then people ask more questions I find sometimes, but it's just nice to kind of, it's like, I am what you see kind of thing, you know, what you see is what you get Which is so rare on all social media, but especially on Grindr Yeah, you do It's rare, I don't know what you get Yeah, I think we've all been there, but a lot of people who poor hate you be positive under Grindr end up being educators for the community Oh yeah, actually, you need to have like notes on the side of like all the links, you can send them or whatever A copy and paste, yeah, the four is, yeah, Excel, the questions are the same It is, but no, like I mean, you know, sometimes don't mind that, but then also, you know, like sometimes you're on Grindr because you're on Grindr And you know, you want to, I don't know, meet someone, hook up with someone, whatever you want to do, it's like, you don't really want to be the educator And it does put a huge onus on us now, so you know, I feel like HIV positive people are very educated, you know, because they have to be Because it's a part of their lives, but you know, at the same time, you know, like if the people are worried about STIs or whatever, like there's plenty of resources that you just have to type it into Google And you know, I'm happy to do that, like to inform people and, you know, I want to play, you know, a bigger role in ending stigma or challenging stigma with, you know, STIs, with sex in general I have a role you can play, but more about that later Yeah, but you did play But first, I wanted to ask you, when it comes to STIs, we know that STIs are on dramatically on the rise in Dublin and in Ireland at the moment And years ago, if you were on Grindr and you saw Bearback or talk about Bearback, it would definitely be like an anonymous profiler It was very rare because there was still so much stigma around it, especially before Prep and you would close you Now, almost all of the profiles have a BB on them And it's just very much part of the culture Oh, I've been getting around all the time Sorry, baby You know, it's just very popular, I guess, is the way to describe it And I'm not shaming them, you do you boo But what do you think about that for young people? For example, if I go for a test this week, it's going to be two weeks before I get a result I'm going to have had sex within those two weeks, and I'm ever going to have a real idea whether I am safe and good to go or whether I am Yeah, I think Bearback has gotten very popular I suppose, and the thing is what people don't realise with tests as well is like, you know, say you have sex on the 8th of April or whatever And then you do a test two weeks later Some of those tests aren't going to come back properly valid because it might take a month or whatever until they'll show you proper results So people don't realise that, they think, oh, I'm all clear, and then they have sex and they might potentially have some form of STI And then, you know, either a person is getting tested, they think they're clear or whatever So I think, you know, there is a place for Bearback sex, is that's what's the point? You will find beta there But no, there's nothing wrong with that I think it does also come with all the education and all the risks and then maybe talking to your partner or partners And yeah, and just kind of, if you are going to get tested, just know the limitations of the test Like, no, it's not always going to be accurate or you have to counter it for the fact that it might take a month for the results to come back So yeah, I suppose it's just all about having a positive discussion with your partner or partners about it So yeah, that's more important than ever, and that's why I suppose stigma is so important because people aren't going to have those conversations They feel like they're going to be judged It's quite interesting for young people because people who lived through the 80s and 90s and 90s who had sex during that time And you know, it's the time of AIDS where the whole community, the people in our communities are being who died unfortunately You know, because there's no access to treatment at the time or no treatment available But now, just this new generation of people where people are in the dying of AIDS, you know, they live in the time of U=U, of PrEP, of PET And condoms are just one kind of small tool in the toolbox and they're at least fun one to be honest with you They're people like, "I don't need it, I'm not going to get through to person fragmented potentially" So yeah, it just seems like the condom conversation has just fell from the wayside because people prefer bear back because they're. Because it keeps your cash clean It keeps your cash clean I prefer you swallowing it You don't mind You don't have an icky condom show to do with that But that's why I prefer it Yeah, I'm just kidding But it's interesting, we actually haven't had this conversation before, Vader It was like, what we loved about in Australia was I'd use whatever tool in the toolbox that's right for you at the moment, don't feel shame around it Just trying to make as an informed decision as possible and it's up to education system, it's up to us They have been informed society to make those decisions And that's why I have any particular more or less shame or prestige on either tool Yeah, and I agree But I do think though, you made a really important point and it kind of circles back to what Vader was just saying that with the younger generation, because we are living in a time where there is access to treatment in Ireland Definitely for free if you're HIV positive and then there is PrEP and there's PEP But I do feel like these concerns about HIV and other SGIs have kind of fell out the wayside because we're not really. Not that we're not seeing as much because we are HIV is on their eyes in Ireland But I think that in the past when we had AIDS crisis, there was all these kind of scare tactics and all the odds that everyone seemed to infamous ads But the education hasn't caught up with that, at least the ads scared people for worse people knew the risks But now people aren't really hearing about it, particularly younger people and then even more so, like, you know, strict straight younger people, but also queer young people. I think they don't acknowledge the risk as much of HIV transmission and other STIs. I'm like, that's where I think there needs to be kind of, we need to catch those people following to the cracks. - 'Cause there isn't even conversation about it. When you're on hookup apps and you're hooking up, it's not like maybe after sex, you might get into an interesting conversation, but for the most part, there's like, after sex, they're like, so what do you do wait your life and you're like, Jesus, okay? - I'm an activist. (laughing) - I'm a drag queen. - Yeah. - I'm your biggest nightmare. - So, (laughing) - No, not panty. - When we talk about panty later. (laughing) - We'll talk about panty later. - But when we talk about HIV, we normally talk about the past, or the present, we're like, prep, or new, could you. But we never really talk about the future, where we want the future to go. And then I really want to get a young person's perspective of this as someone who lived in HIV. - Okay, I'll tell you. (laughing) I've been a young person for decades, Robby. I do it very well. - Yeah, only as young as the man you feel. That's what the man keeps saying. - Well, I'm very young. - Yeah. - Which is a bit bad shit, or a fellow 70 years old, and I don't know, so I think she gets a short and a dastic. But then, Adrian, comment. (laughing) Adrian, what do you hope for in the future when it comes to HIV? Where do you think as someone who lived in HIV, you will be in like 20 years' time? - Oh, she used. - Which UN's day? (laughing) - Watching beta. - On a Zimma frame. - The Spanish frame. - The Spanish frame. - You'll be on a Zimma frame. - I'll be on a Zimma frame. (laughing) - Okay, I suppose, I don't know. You could always hope that I suppose, maybe treatments progress even further. And I imagine that it will have, 'cause obviously it is, you know, like there's injections now. So, hopefully that'll be made more accessible. I hope in general, like obviously, in our island that like HIV is on the decline. And I know you guys were in Australia recently and they're one of the first major countries in the world to start seeing a decrease, you know? And that's what we really should be focusing on because we have the tools to do it, you know? Like the medications there, we can do the education part. We just, I think, you know, there needs to be, the grassroots movement is great. You know, and they're kind of leading it. Like, you guys are leading it. And, you know, there needs to be, I suppose, maybe more of a government response or more of an overall conversation about this to get there. But I do hope that maybe in 20 years that we will be there and that, you know, it'll be kind of a bittersweet that won't it? Because, you know, like-- - I'll be able to stop then. (laughing) - I need to retire. - I need to retire. If I'm supposed to be there sweet in the way, obviously, it's great, you know, when HIV is declining. But I suppose, you know, being HIV positive for us is like, it's such a part of our life, you know? And I was actually thinking yesterday before coming on here, I was like, you know, I don't regret being HIV positive. And if I could change that, I don't think I would because it's informed my life so much since that, you know? So, yeah. - So you're not gonna take a cure if everyone happens. (laughing) - I don't think I have a problem. - I know. - I don't think I have a problem. - Obviously, yeah, to really interesting question. 'Cause it is such a big part of our identity and our work. And obviously we will take it if, you know, down the line. But if there is a cure, is there a cause to our overall health? It's depending on the root of the cure or the modality or how it actually works. So, yeah, it'll be an interesting one when it comes on the, on the scene, if it comes on the scene or even vaccines, right? - Yeah. - Come on, the conversation changes even more. - So, yeah. - Speaking of changing the conversation, I wanna talk about me. (laughing) I actually wanna talk about you. I wanna talk about us, Adrian, and you, Robbie. Because one of the things that we haven't gotten into yet is that Robbie and I are collaborating with some amazing people at all their stories, film production, to make a 25 minute long biopic about my life. And Robbie is gonna be playing the young pantybless, already filmed. - Already done. - Already young pantybless, killed it, smashed it. And Adrian, you are playing me from a teenager till about mid 20th. - I had the honor. Yeah, it was a really, really fun time doing the filming. Vated in my makeup. It was a very kind of like mother daughter experience. (laughing) - She knows. - She does that first hand. We were both in drag the last time we saw each other. In the George, I as baby panty, you were baby Veda. And I think we killed her, right? - I think we did. I was so nervous doing it, but it was great fun. It was so weird standing on a stage of like drag queens who done this before. And I've seen you in drag before Robbie. So, you're not a newbie to it. - No. - And I'm here like, oh my god, what am I doing? But no, it was really good. And everyone was so nice. - And what's not only been in drag, you were acting, right? So there's a camera. - What's the first thing you ever had to do it? And you had to evoke God baby Veda. - I know. - I know, I know. - And I killed it. - And Robbie was here like with the microphone pretending to be panty with all these like opening lines. And I was like, oh crap, what am I gonna say? - Yeah. (laughing) - But no, it went really good. - I was thinking too when you started telling us that you were in school when you started getting calls from your doctors, that we had this school boy scene where you were in uniform and the lockers in school. And it's like, wow, RIT, meditating life, meditating, drag. - Yeah, exactly. - Do you know what Veda? Do you know what I love about this project? And I love that you wanted this project based around this idea was that you want as many people live in HIV as in this biopic of yours. You wanted pause representation because when we had Nathaniel Hall from medicine on, one of the things that we came out rage on was that there was actually only one person in medicine who was living major, your openly living major, and so you kind of wanted to put that on his head and have as many of the positive drive in as possible. - We have a list, really. - Yeah. - Half of the people there in our last day of filming were out and about living with HIV and people who are part of our tribe that we're lucky to hang around with. - What you most proud of of this whole biopic? - You as pantheon. (laughing) - Okay. That was very special. - I'm kind of into corsets now. (laughing) - I'm like a posture, I'm like a little whore. - I guess to be on Mars when I was home. (laughing) - Long suffering, Mars. - Yeah. - And that's his name on Grindr. (laughing) - I guess what I'm proud is about is that we came back from Sydney World Pride and the whole process of developing the script with Colin has been about ad libbing and not being too strict about what we're actually gonna say. And we had such incredible time in Sydney and I learned so many things that when we came back, that really influenced everything that I actually ended up saying on camera and took it to another level, I think, having that kind of world view and getting spent so much time with you in particular. So I'm proudest, I guess, of the HIV TED talk that sort of happens at the end of the film. I hope it comes together as well as I intended it to. - So where can people hear more about this movie when can we expect it to come here? - On this podcast, Robbie. - Yeah, on this podcast, keep an eye out. Keep your eyes on Erz peeled. - It's the only place for now because, funnily enough, the film is called "Pregnant with the Drag Queen" and I was pregnant with you and you. (laughing) It was also pregnant with Pixie who's in the film and in a way pregnant with you. So, but Colin, who is the director and creator of the film is having a baby with his gorgeous wife at the moment. So I believe we've got about two and a half months before the baby arrives and the ideas for the film to be finished by them. - I hope the baby ends up being a drag queen. - Or life. - I think everybody really does this where the planet's going. - Yeah, it's true, right. It's like a zombie apocalypse sort of. - So, Adrian, you have to book, you have the activist book. I know you have the show biz book. - I do. (laughing) - I do I. (laughing) - I'm more chasing after you, baby. (laughing) - I'm BB. What do you want in the future? Do you want more of this, more activism? What can we expect, Majin? - Yeah, I think more activism. I'm kind of working on the side of like just seeing what I want to do with, like I said, reducing the stigma around STIs and, and yeah, I don't know, maybe like bring that into nursing, see where that goes, maybe do both, here it goes. But yeah, I see the future in activism. I think it's pretty important. And you can affect so many people in such a positive way. So, yeah. - Well, next time I have a Drippy Willy, I want to come straight to you and I want to have a little kitty. (laughing) - And Arlin's like a threat. - Yeah. (laughing) - Locke. (laughing) This is the last time we talk. (laughing) The baby panty invader feud has officially come. - Drippy Willy. (laughing) - Another one. - Another one. - Well, on that note, thank you so much for coming in. - Thank you for having me. - And everyone, just watch yourselves. Adrian's under scene. Adrian's gonna be making changes. - You're welcome. - Yeah, thank you for playing me. Thank you for playing with me. I love you. It's been such a fun experience. Until next time, folks remember to stay positive and stay powerful. Yes. Bye. Bye. Thank you for listening to Puzzvi Podcast. Thank you to everyone who got tested, everyone who's on treatment, and everyone who's on prep. We love you and we're in this together. This season of Puzzvi Podcast is recorded in Sydney, Australia, on the land of the Aboriginal and Torres Strait Island people. We wish to acknowledge them as the traditional owners of this beautiful place. (upbeat music)