259: A Rare Breed..

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You can talk to one of their 19,000 local agents in person over the phone, through their easily accessible app, or at statefarm.com. Whatever works for you, like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Are you ready? I'm ready. I don't, is my hair ready? That's, that's a better question. You do have a little cockatoo in the back. A little cockatoo, okay. I thought I had my brush on me, and I don't. I know. I forgot my whole makeup bag. You don't have a brush. But you know what we do have? Friends. Me and you. Friends. Us. Each other. Friendship. Friendship. Oh, we don't even have that. No, I'm kidding. Camaraderie. Camaraderie. What? Oh, Sabrina Carpenter. Oh, God. I was like, don't make me explain this. You know, my brain is a little slower this morning. You know, we had a good, good time last night, a lot of fun. We went to a tennis, I called it a game, and someone yelled at me on Instagram. Someone yelled at me for wearing Skechers there, so. Tennis is a different world. You know, I'm about it, though, thanks to our friends at Lululemon inviting us. That was a good time. Really good time. And I'm now into it. But yes, it's called a match. But I'm really excited to be kicking off. We've been kicking off this week. We've had a really fun adventure this weekend, and now we're capping it off with a little bubbly. Yes, and it's Morgan's birthday week, so let the celebrations continue. And here. I cannot keep up at the ripe age of 32 now. Well, I was thinking I wanted to take, because I haven't really done what I would like to do for you, and so I was hoping to take it. Take you to, like, a massage, or, and I feel like that's something where. I love that. That's not something you want to be over with, right? No. Yeah. We love a massage. Yeah. We love a massage. Everyone knows I have my spot here that I love. But yeah. So we could do that tonight, or maybe a different day of your choosing, but I would love. I'm going to go home and read my book. Okay, so it's a no. You guys, I got really into Fourth Wing, and now I'm like, I really want to record this episode, share these unreal stories with you guys, and then go home and read. Like, I'm, you know? And you get a book, and you're just like, oh my God, what is up with Zayden, this freaking weirdo? Don't, don't bring up things, because people are going to spoil it for you, and I don't want them to, because I genuinely. I want to spoil it for myself. Don't do that. Don't do it. I started watching Poldark. I Googled a couple things. Well, it's, I know you do that with movies. Don't do that with a book, please. Because I wish I didn't know the things I know about some of the books that I've read. It would be so much more fun. Okay. And so. I'll do it just for you. Thanks. Just for you. Okay, cool. I'm so excited to have you back. I've been working on this theme for a little bit, and I think it's like going to be my new recurring theme. Kind of like we did Unhinged, Unhinged 2.0. These people are just in a league of their own. They are unique in their activity, their problems. They are what you would call a rare breed. And so that is where we're at today. We've got a bunch of people that are just rare breeds, and I think you all are going to be thoroughly entertained by them. I was reading them initially, and I'm so excited to hear your thoughts. Yay. Do you have anything to share with the class, Lauren? I mean, not on the spot like that. Any new updates? It's been months since you've been here. It has been. I was on Patreon, though. You were. That was a fun app. Yes. But no, I, what has happened since I've last seen everyone? Everyone. Everyone. Everyone. You went scuba diving. Wow. It has been a long time. Yeah. So it's been since like December. I did go scuba diving. Very gorgeous in Cozumel, Cozumel. I don't know if I'm saying that right. Worked a lot. And I don't remember. I don't remember my life this year in 2026. No? I don't know. Oh my gosh. What else have I done? I don't know. Okay. It doesn't matter. Am I being weird? I think we're both being weird. Okay. Well, shake it off. We need to get over this. Like, I'm, I'm going to be honest. I'm a little hungover. Oh. I think that's where my weirdness is coming from. Okay. I think I'm like a little overstimulated and that's where my weirdness is, but not in the bad way. No, I feel that though, too. It's actually just like, I'm, I have like a lot of energy and I usually don't on Sundays. And so this is like very exciting, but almost overwhelming. Where do I start? Do you have so much energy that you'd like to read today? I don't really know that I can finish. Maybe a couple. That'd be so great. That'd be so great. I'll give it a shot. I like this. I might end up skipping. Ah! I just saw my life flash before my eyes. I did too, because it came towards me. You just witnessed a near-death experience. Weren't you holding your thumb? I was. Were you holding your thumb on it? No, I thought they stayed until I, until I, until I, what do you think the safety cage is for people lose eyes from champagne bottles every year. Don't say that. Don't say that. Take that back. I literally saw it. Take it back. We're going to have to roll the tape. I think it hit the bottom of the mic flag. It's matching my energy right now. Like the bottle? Yes. Dude, we are rare breeds. We ourselves are rare breeds. We fit right along with these people today. Are you okay? We're going to need to, we're going to need to pick this up tomorrow. Circle back. We're done here. Oh my God. It's like the new, what is it? Nevermind. Okay. Well, I'm curious where you're going with that. No, let's get back to the stories. I need something to keep me on track. Okay. Without further ado. Wow, that was scary. let's dive in okay let's do it safely cheers so as a lot of us know because i do talk about colon cancer quite a bit especially recently it is colon cancer awareness month in march and i think it's really important to just make sure you're watching for symptoms talking to your loved ones and just making sure that you're especially if they are over 45 because the screening age and like what they're doing colonoscopies at now is 45 it's been lowered so talk to your loved ones especially if you know they have stomach issues i think it's it's crucial to address early it's one of the only types of cancer that's actually preventable and i've heard colonoscopies are the best naps you'll ever have mine is scheduled for april justin's is scheduled for april it's going to be really really good obviously don't psych yourself out and get one if you don't need one but there's some common symptoms and i'm going to talk about them after we get into this story and this isn't necessarily a part of our rare breed theme but i really just want to read this story because colon cancer is something that's like really affected my family and i've gotten so many messages and comments from listeners out there saying me talking about it encouraged you to talk to your mom and i've gotten so many messages and comments from listeners out and they discovered stage three cancer and now she's fine like i'm sharing something on instagram that has just been really meaningful for me and so i want to talk about it yeah and at the top of the month right when it's you know conversations really going absolutely okay so this is coming from today i fucked up titled today i fucked up dismissing bright red blood in my stool for years if you're currently experiencing this symptom please read my experience i've had small amounts of bright red blood on my stool for years i had always dismissed this finding because I'm young with a horrible diet. I've always been taught that black stool is the worrisome stool, as that's indicative of upper gastrointestinal bleeding, whereas stool that has bright red blood just indicates hemorrhoids. My logic for dismissing the bright red blood? I've had a diet consisting of high sugar, high fat, processed foods with low fiber, in addition to being very inactive, causing constipation and straining. So bleeding from straining just made sense. I'm 6'1", at 225 pounds. Blood was not consistent. It came and went. There was not a lot of blood, and when it was, it looked like skin marks on the stool, something I thought was obviously related to hemorrhoids. I'm young, 29. Family history of hemorrhoids, so I thought me having hemorrhoids was just part of the family business. Also, lack of education, especially knowledge relating to polyps, an abnormal tissue formation resembling a skin tag in the colon. Why did I meet with a GI specialist? The blood in my stool became more of an everyday thing that lasted for months. From my perspective, that frequency was abnormal. My GI doctor thought it was more than likely hemorrhoids, but still recommended a colonoscopy because no matter what, blood in stool, especially in young adults, is not normal and should always be inspected. What was found from my colonoscopy? A 20-millimeter polyp. To put it into perspective, a 10-millimeter polyp is considered big. The polyp was sent to pathology, and in a few days, I received a call. They discovered that cancer had formed on the polyp. It's more of a rare cancer, less than 1% of colon cancers, that is ultimately a little bit more aggressive than the average colon cancer. At this point, I've been staged at stage 3A. After getting a part of my colon removed and six weeks later, I will now be starting chemotherapy in five days. The doctors do feel I have an 80-90% chance of being cured with chemo's assistance, but what's more interesting about this cancer is that it is most common in younger people, around later 20s, early 30s. The doctors mentioned that they are seeing colon cancer rise more often in young people. If you have had blood in your stool, you more than likely do not have colon cancer, but you should get yourself checked by a doctor if you are having this symptom just to make sure there's nothing going on. Common symptoms for anyone who has colon cancer is that they have a lot of blood in their stool. Obviously, we have the blood in stool, but there's also changes in your bowel habits, diarrhea, constipation, incomplete bowel movement, so like the constant urge to go, but you can't empty yourself, like nothing really happens, abdominal pain, persistent pain, cramps, really gas pain, the feeling of being bloated. There's a lot of other ones too that are now being connected, like general weakness, fatigue, unexplained weight loss. So if you or anyone you know is experiencing any of these, talk to a doctor, get checked. I think it's just, it's again, so preventative, so treatable. And if it's left untreated, it's, it's just, it's horrible. No cancer is fun, but I feel like as I've watched someone go through that one and a couple others, that one really, it was brutal. Not to just like pile it all on, but I do want to mention that there's been multiple people that I know that have lost their lives to heart problems and heart attacks. And they have been, they've been on the rise lately. And I think that that's another thing too, to like take very seriously, look up the symptoms of it. If you're experiencing them, especially women, yeah, go in, like don't like, it's so, it's really easy for a woman to write it off as like, it's heartburn. Anxiety. I'm fine. Indigestion. I can push through it. And it's not, it's not worth it. Like always, always go in and. Yeah. Lauren just lost a mutual friend who was what, like 30 from a heart attack and she thought it was heartburn. And so I always think it's better to be safe than sorry. And I know, you know, depending on where you're at, healthcare is difficult and it can be, you know, a high burden. To access, but it is better to be safe than sorry. You know, you only got one life. So look out for yourself. I will say we do have an update on this post. So this update is coming from nine days ago. The original post is now five years old. Oh, wow. Hey everyone, girls, guys, days and gays. I'm still alive. It's been five years since my original post where I informed you all that I ignored blood in my stool. And later found out I had colon cancer before I get started with my life update. I would like to offer a genuine apology to those that had messaged me after my first post asking for an update and wishing me well, the experience was traumatizing. The farther I got from my diagnosis date and being NED, no evidence of disease, the less I wanted to relive the trauma of being diagnosed. Please understand that it was protecting myself from anxiety and panic attacks. For those still reading, here's my life update below. According to my oncologist, yes, I was diagnosed with stage three adenocarcinoma of sigmoid colon signet ring cell. I hope I remain cancer free for the rest of my life. And I hope that I don't need to make a very awkward. Hey, guys, it's back post to what's my current health look like? I'm six one roughly 285. I've gained weight about 60 to 70 pounds. And my liver is fatty. I'm actively losing weight at this time with the help of a medication relationship. I'm officially married. As of January 18th, 2026. Yay. Congratulations. We've been together for three years and agreed to marry earlier if my cancer returned. The partner I was with when I was diagnosed is no longer my partner. We broke up about one year after my diagnosis. To be honest, she took very good care of me when I needed her the most. I'll always appreciate her for that. Mental health. I've had anxiety and depression. I think it's about the same, maybe even somewhat improved since pre diagnosis. Two pros of a cancer diagnosis. One, I have people in my life I never would have had without the diagnosis. Paige, my cancer mom, and Ben, my cancer dad, have all been on speed dial since I met them in my colon cancer support group five years ago. Why am I emotional from this? Two, there's no experience that will make you realize how precious life is than genuinely thinking you will die soon within the next few years. Some shout outs, my wife, who will always be there for me, my mom, my stepdad and brother. Who always be there for me, Paige and Ben, Tanner and Sarah, friends that I've made in my support group who were taken by cancer. My best friends, Amir, Jason, Richard, Jess, Steve, Deb, who always be there for me. Well, I don't know what else to add. You can ask any questions. I'll do my best to answer. I stream on Twitch occasionally, so you can definitely ask questions there as well. And then they share their Twitch username, which is Nurse Dave I-T-H. Maybe Nurse, Daveth. But yeah, I'll have the link in the description if you want to go and chat with him, ask him any questions. But it's really, it just like was so full circle. And I didn't see the original post. I saw this update coming, you know, a couple of days ago. And then I was like, wait, what was this TIFU? And oh, it's March, Colon Cancer Awareness Month. What a perfect time to share. Absolutely. So I think that's honestly, Morgan told me the other day that Justin was talking to her about the fact that if she's going to be able to do it, she's going to be able to do it. If she wants to help a large amount of people, like this is a good place to be. And it's something as simple as bringing it up and bringing up awareness on this silly podcast where we say stupid things all the time. Yeah. But most of what we say is dumb. We should be in one ear on the other. Yeah, we get that. But like, but I think that, you know, then we then we trick you with these with these really meaningful moments that could actually impact your life. And Morgan has had people reach out and. Let her know that just the awareness alone has. Yeah. And I think that's really beautiful. So I hope that there's somebody that's, you know, listening right now that is getting help that maybe they wouldn't have otherwise, because that's that is the beautiful part about this platform growing and being big and reaching a lot of people. So anyway, just thank you for that. It's a it's a nice reminder. I've been I've been dealing with a lot of burnout lately, and I've been talking about it probably to an annoying degree for you. Yeah. Yeah. And it's just it's mental health is something that's also really important to address. And Justin, I get into it on Patreon. And, you know, now more than ever, when the world is at such a heavy, scary point, I feel like, you know, we've made statements like this over the years of this podcast, but it just keeps coming. And you're like, oh, my God. And, you know, with everything from files getting released and just I don't know if anyone else has dealt with this, but you scroll and you just feel like you're like. Someone described it as like having an episode of psychosis because you're like all of this info is coming out. All of these bad things are happening. And yet no one's doing anything about it. And it can just. Yeah. And helpless. So helpless. Yeah. And so I have to keep that in mind that like this is everyone's, you know, safe space. This is where a lot of us come to just tune out the weight of the world and get into these crazy stories. And that's what it is for me too. And I appreciate all of you being here and spreading awareness and talking. To your loved ones. And it's a really, really near and dear issue for me. And so if you want to see other people's stories that they heard an episode talk about. to their family, getting checked, found things. I'm going to have a bunch of stories over on the Too Hot Takes Instagram. So go over there and check it out. But it's meant a lot to me and I appreciate all of you sharing. But OK, before I start bawling my eyes out, let's get into these stories. OK, let's do it. This one was originally posted in our very own Too Hot Takes subreddit. And then our friend Direct Caterpillar 77 recommended this person to share it on the subreddit, which you might have already gotten this tea on Patreon. But I'm working with Direct Caterpillar 77 to get them on like maybe a Zoom or just even like a phone call to give their take on a story. They're a little nervous. They said I have a stutter and I'm just like, I don't know if I'm the best speaker. And I'm like, I'm not either. No. None of us are like we all stumble with our words. And I'm like, no, no, no, you'll be great. So we're in the works on it. It's it's going to come. So I'm really excited because there's such a big contributor to Reddit and this show as of late. So the post is titled Guy I'm Seen Constantly Talks in a Baby Voice. It's a no for me. So I, 27 female, met this guy, 29 male, on a dating app. And have hung out about five times now. He's very attractive, like has a six pack and very fit, even though I normally don't seek out guys this fit. I'll take back the no. But anyways, I generally enjoy hanging out with him, except for one thing. He is constantly talking in a baby voice. The first time we hung out, we went to dinner and there was no baby voice until we went back to his place. And he got very snuggly and would occasionally say stuff or sound in a baby voice way. The third time we hung out, he came over to my place and he met my cat. He used the baby voice a lot around the cat, obviously, and while talking about the cat. But I kind of brush it off because that's pretty normal, I guess, when you see cute animals. He said stuff mostly like, oh, what a handsome man, such a cute widow guy, etc. I love that. So it wasn't too bad. The fourth time we hung out again at my place and the baby voice was much more prevalent. I'd say he used it about 50% of the time. He said anything, not even related to the cat or anything. At this point, I was like, OK, this is getting odd. When we were messing around, he was a little too rough and I told him to be a little gentler. And he said stuff in his baby voice like, oh, my goodness. And I be gentle. Weird. So last night was the fifth time we hung out and the baby voice is really irking me. He used it about 75% of the time. Oh, no. Even when hooking up. After we were done once, he asked me if I orgasmed, which I did. And I said, yes. And he said, yay. Oh, no. In a baby voice. Oh, no. Then I said I did twice, actually. And he said in his baby voice, and I quote, am I a big boy? Oh, what the fuck? I kind of laughed awkwardly and was like, oh, yeah, I guess it was so weird and such a turnoff. Who says that? So I think I need to break it off with this guy because it's just getting weird at this point. How should I go about it in a nice way? Or should I bring up his baby voice and ask him to tone it down? Is this as weird as I think it is? I mean, try to ask him to tone it down first. Yeah. I mean, it sounds like at least the intimacy is real good. Yeah. Maybe there's something to work out here. Right. I would say give it a shot. To? Yeah. After the fifth date? I'm like, that takes years. It can. No, definitely ask him to stop. Can we just. Can you just like stop being weird? Like tone it down a little bit or I think just asking like, what's up with the baby voice? Like, is this, is this usual? Or do you, do you think I'm into it? Like, what's up? I would be like, I'm icked out. Stop or leave. I, this would give me the ick too. And I, I've seen a lot of videos of people sharing their icks. I want to hear everyone's like icks. What's like the most absurd ick you've gotten? I talked to a guy in high school that was like this, that was like really baby voice. Oh my God. And was like, come here, little cutie. And I'm like, wait, I couldn't make it work. He was such a nice guy. Oh. So sweet. Okay. Cause I feel like the other guy that you dated also did that. Maybe that was just his voice. Was that the one that was like Morgan Ashley? Yeah. Yeah. Morgan Ashley. Yeah. I feel like he did that too, but. Yeah. A little. You know, I think it's actually your fault for having a cat. No, I'm kidding. But like, I. Dude, I'm, we're going to do an episode coming up where we just rage bait. Yeah. We give such bad takes. Yeah. The whole episode. Yeah. I just want to like, I want to be on the opposite side and just like rage bait. Oh my God. People are like, you do that all the time. I wouldn't. Yeah. I wouldn't be able to handle that though, because then we'd have clips on like floating around the internet. And then like, I'd have some, like, I'd have like a second cousin come across it and be like, what's wrong with her? So I, you know. No, I do actually think about this because I, I like, can't not talk baby talk when there's an animal around. That is, no, that's the most normal response. But like to, but to the animal, you know, like me and me and Ollie will be like about Pluto. We'll be like, what a handsome boy, you know, but then I don't normal, but then I don't look at Alejandra and say, you such a pretty girl. I know there's kind of a time and a place. And unless it's like a conversation where it's like, I'm really into this, would you be willing to give this a try? Yeah. Then I feel like you can incorporate it. But other than that, it can kind of be like, I'm going to feel weird. So conversation needed. I don't know if it's like breakup worthy unless it's like, oh, he genuinely cannot stop this. And it's, it becomes a hundred percent of the time. I mean, it's super new. And that's the thing is that when you're that new and you come across these things that make you feel that way, it's really easy to just end, end it there. Obviously, if you guys were like five years in instead of five dates in, then I would be like, no, you guys can work through this, but it's really up to you. I think that, I think there's nothing wrong in being like, I'm going to be honest. I think you're so attractive, but the baby voice makes me not in the mood. And I just wanted to be transparent about that. Simple as that. Yeah. And then see how they respond. And if he's like, and actually that might be a good one. Cause then if he gets really defensive and weird about it, then you can be like, okay, well, I don't like if I'm giving feedback and this person gets this defensive or maybe they make changes or maybe they don't make changes. I think that's a good thing. I think that's a good way to even see in general, like if you do bring up something, how they react. So yeah. Are they receptive to feedback? Are they willing to like work on things? Compromise? It's really good to find out early on. Yeah. I mean, he could turn around and be like, well, I think you're ugly anyway. And then, and then you have your answer. Then you're like, okay, goodbye. Yeah. But I think it's worth saying something. It's not like one of those things that he can't change about himself. Right. Like it's, and if he doesn't want to change about himself, then like, that's fine too. Oh, good. But at least you give, you get a chance, you know? I'm with you. Yeah. I'm with you. Top comment. Talking to a pet or a baby is pretty much the only time this is okay. The rest of the times are a hell no. Someone else comments back. Yeah. Once the baby talk progresses to the bedroom, it's time for a conversation in not baby talk. And a lot of people are saying like flip the script on him, take a look at his junk and say, how are you doing today? Widow guy. That's like how to lose guy in 10 days. That's okay. Why was that the first thought that popped into my head? Cause she goes, she's like, she named it like miss, like miss princess or something. I was like, how's little princess doing? I know. But no, I literally, when I was reading this story, I was like, is he trying to lose a girl in 10 days? Cause he's amping it up. Normal first date. Yeah. You know, gets, gets some action. Did Okay. So we do get an update on this one. All right, guys, I have a little update for y'all. It won't let me link to the old posts. So just go to my profile. I was getting very concerned about him having a mommy slash little fetish as most of you suggested and worked up the courage to talk to him about it. I didn't cross my mind. Whoa. Well, text him since typing this stuff out helps me articulate what I like to say better. Here's how it went. Me. Hey, there's been something on my mind. Can I talk to you about it? Him. Yeah. What's up? Me. I've noticed that you've been talking in a baby voice quite often, and I'm wondering if you notice it or if it's something you didn't realize you were doing. I'm not trying to be mean or confrontational, but it makes me a little uncomfortable, especially when we have sex. And I'd rather just be honest about my feelings than keep it to myself. Him. Huh? LOL. Next time, show me this noise and I'll cut it out. Oh my God. Me giving him the benefit of the doubt. Yeah, I figured you didn't realize it. Next time I'll point it out. LOL. Then he called me and was basically like, like, quote, yeah, next time I do it, just bop me on the head because I didn't realize I was doing it. And I asked him if it could possibly be a sexual thing or a fetish slash kink related and that I won't judge him if it were. He said no, that he loved his mom, but not like that. LOL. He also went on to say that he used to work the night shift for several months and has been taking Xanax and melatonin at night to help him sleep now that he works a normal day shift. And that could possibly be making him loopy. We've only ever really hung out at night, so that could be a possibility. I enjoy spending time with him and generally give people the benefit of the doubt. So we're going to hang out this week and I'll see how it goes and update y'all later. Update. Yay. OK, so I deleted my original post and the update because I was super paranoid that he would see it and maybe I was blowing things out of proportion. But after an attempt to clear things up today, I'm even more suspicious. Oh, granted, it could honestly just be something innocent and he thinks it's cute and funny instead of it being like a fetish. Anyways, here's my original post and update and I'll post the smaller news update at the end. So we've been texting since this morning and I wanted to kind of clear things up and express my Xanax concerns. But now I'm like almost 100% sure he made up that excuse because he was embarrassed that I called him out on the baby voice. So here's our convo. Him sends a pic of his sleep tracker that says he got 11 hours of sleep. Wow. And I go, me, that melatonin is putting in work. Him, it sure did its job last night. Me. So do you have to take Xanax slash melatonin every night? Him, for the past two months. Yeah, I don't take melatonin. It really doesn't do anything. Me. So just Xanax. Him. Yeah, but it's actually working. So after the race, I'm just going to take it as needed. You can't take that stuff forever. Me. Yeah, I was about to say it's bad to take for a long time. So it's making you feel better. Me. I'm just using it to fix my circadian rhythm. Sleep is really important in my non-board certified medical opinion. I mean, it depends on a lot of factors, how much I've eaten, if I'm tired, et cetera. But yeah, sometimes. Me. Interesting. Well, I don't know if we should be hooking up if you're taking meds that mess with you like that, because that kind of blurs the lines of consent, you know? Him. I mean, I don't want to make you feel like you're taking advantage of me because you're not. And two, I don't have to take the medication. It's just a sleep aid. Me. Yeah, I know. But if it's making you loopy slash talk a certain way, that's kind of concerning, you know? Well, I totally shouldn't drink on them. I will say that. I mean, I'm just taking Xanax derivative for a short term to fix my sleep schedule. It's not like I'm taking some antipsychotic. Me. Yeah, it's really bad to drink on them. And OK, well, I just haven't heard of Xanax being prescribed for sleep, but I'm just cautious because I have a friend who had problems with it. It's not Xanax. It's a benzodiazepine. Me. OK. And that's the end of our combo as of now. At this point, I'm just super curious as to if he actually has a fetish or if it's just something innocent and he's embarrassed. So it's just a very odd situation. I would really like to get to the bottom of this. And I'm planning on seeing him Wednesday night to discuss things further unless something happens between now and then. We'll keep you updated. Is that it? That's all we got. I'm kind of confused how she like deleted everything and posted it again. With this update, this update doesn't feel that profound. I guess it's kind of adding more to the context of like, oh, is he doing this baby voice because he's taking a medication and like it's altering how he's acting or is there more here? What's the timeline from the update? Like, is he still talking baby talk for after the conversation for how long? Like, I'm just trying to get that timeline straight. Great. Or like, is she now just worried about the like use of Xanax? So original post was April 27th. The other update, like the latest one is April 29th. So it's all just in the span of a couple of days. Hasn't even seen him again since addressing it in a text conversation. But someone did respond or like comment to OP and was like, at a certain point, you need to stop asking strangers on the internet. And make a decision. Yeah. And OP was like, you're right. I'm just going to delete this soon and break it off. I mean, bottom line, if something weirds you out, it gives you the ick, it weirds you out. For sure. If you find early on that like stuff someone's starting to tell you just isn't adding up, they're probably making stuff up or like they're proving that they can't really be trusted. So it's better to get out early than two years down the road when you find out, oh, no, they've been lying to me this whole time. And I'm like, oh, no, they've been lying to me this whole time and have another life. Or no, he never had Xanax and melatonin. He was blah, blah, blah. Like, I don't know. I've had like the craziest lies like ever told. Like we've talked about this in the past of like a guy who pretended he was in this band and would like download the music of this band and then like save it as his own. Like, you know, back when like LimeWire or like downloading things legally was a big thing. Yeah. And he would download it and be like, yeah, this is my band. And then it was like literally a popular band on the radio. I don't I don't think you've told me that. Oh, God, I could have swore we've talked about it on the early days of this. Maybe. It's been a while. But yeah, that's that guy. Yeah. Baby voice. Baby voice. I'd love to hear everyone's X, though. Give me that. What's yours? Do you have one that comes to mind? I don't really like men's feet in the thong type sandals, the flip flops. OK. I like them in like the slides. But a flip flop. There's something about a dude and a flip flop. And then just like flip flops when they squeak and they're wet and it's a dude and it's just like, oh, I don't know. OK. I don't nothing's really coming to mind, though. Like that's that's so even the flip flop thing. I'm like, that's dumb. No, no, that's a good one. What's yours? I don't know if this counts, but like I hate sharing ice cream. Like I don't want to have like especially like a spoon. Like if somebody wants to share a spoon with ice cream and then they like lick it off and then there's still some like ice cream and spit in the spoon and then like they expect me to use that. Get that away from me. But like, I mean, if anyone's listened long enough, they know that I have like a weird thing with like spit. Like, yeah, bodily fluids, bodily fluids, not where they not in the waist or inside you. Yeah. Anywhere in between. Oh, my gosh. Oh, yeah. The flip flops. Oh, what else? That's flip flops and fluids. Speaking of fluids, this next one is coming from Am I the Asshole? Just two days old at this point. My 35 female partner, 40 male peed in a mug and I was horrified. Am I the asshole for how I reacted? Wait, how did this just line up so perfectly? It's like almost like we rehearsed this. I have a way. Did you move the stories around or was it just that perfect? It was already in that order of tabs. Wow. I'm still a bit shocked, to be honest, so I will try to be as brief as possible. I'm really looking for some outside perspective because I don't know if I'm being unreasonable and difficult here or if this is objectively messed up. My partner came back home for lunch. He went into the kitchen and said something like, I need to pee. As he was walking away to go upstairs, I asked him to slide his shoes off because we had new carpets put down. He then came back and said, forget it. I don't have time. Took a mug with leftover coffee in it and peed into it in the kitchen right next to me, sort of laughing. I was just stunned. He kept laughing and saying, I told you I really needed it. And I just stared, I think, with the sheer horror on my face. He then poured the piss out into the sink. The sink was empty and thoroughly cleaned the mug. I said to him not to bother because I want that cup in a bin. He then started to get annoyed and said, don't be like that. I told you I needed it. I said to him that by the time he came back to the kitchen, he could have slid his shoes off and had been upstairs in the bathroom. He then said, quote, you had to ruin my lunch and probably the weekend. Why do you always have to be such a you make me feel like an absolute piece of shit. I barely said anything because I was absolutely shocked and disgusted. Yeah, I was trying to explain why I was so disgusted, but he just kept interrupting and saying, do you know how much I needed it? In the end, I was just quiet and he left. I don't know what to think. Am I the asshole here? He is pretty convinced that it was nothing and I've made him feel like crap about it. Is this normal behavior? Have I overreacted and made him feel bad for no reason? I mean, you know my take. I'm still shook that like my comment led so well into this story. But yeah, I mean, I pretty much already said how I feel about it. No, I'm repulsed and I'm also annoyed that he's now putting it on her because it's like, no, you're being gross and then you're making her feel bad for her valid reaction and like guilting her about it. I don't know. I guess for people who don't care about stuff like this, if you guys have that relationship and you think it's fun like go for it this is a personal problem for me specifically because of my like yeah i would even i would even say it's like past the ick it like makes me actually my my partner took a sip of what he thought was water and it wasn't i don't know what it was but he spit it back out and even that like met made me start gagging he and he knows that about me so i i was like why would you do that in front of me i'm like get out and that's more of a reasonable reaction right for that he did but he knows that about me that that's not a thing that i'm that i'm okay with so i don't know what their dynamic is or what anyone is maybe they're okay with that type of stuff but like she's not and that's okay that she's not it's a pretty normal thing to be grossed out by i would say maybe that's just me it just feels really rude and disrespectful you and it's like right next to me like i'm in the kitchen you you pick up a coffee cup that has coffee in it yeah like was it hers that she was drinking yeah and then i'm like is this a power move you pee in the coffee mug and then pour it down the sink why not just piss in the sink i'm just like it just overall feels weird and really gross but i'm also like how did you know that you didn't have more pee than what was in that coffee cup like what if you had to pee and it started overflowing the cup whoa now we're and then you got piss on the floor like it just feels so unnecessary then like slip your shoes off and like i don't know if he has like work boots on it just like it feels so immature and just icky and no i don't think you're overreacting and then i completely agree i think there's probably maybe a bigger problem with his reaction to all of this and the fact that it's like you're a drama queen you ruined the weekend you always do this blah blah it's like why yeah like very immature unhealthy response to a normal request of like hey please pee in the toilet next time right i and i i guess i will give a little bit of slack though because i'm like there's been times where i genuinely feel like i'm going to pee my pants and like if that's what we're dealing with then may like i don't know maybe there was just like i was literally going to pee my pants and now you're making me feel bad for already being in a really vulnerable position yeah so maybe there was some of that going on and like i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't like so i guess i'll i'll give some slack there i don't you know either way whatever not the asshole yeah at least that's my take yeah top comment not the asshole this is disgusting and he did it to prove a point in the most asshole way possible does he even like you because it doesn't sound like it agreed does he even like his spouse because damn next comment i don't know man i'm a guy i'd go outside and pee if the toilet is busy yeah and i really really need to go pee in the sink maybe i certainly wouldn't go around and laugh about it in a mug that's freaking insane question from a woman would a mug even hold all of the piss if you really had to go that bad which was like my exact thoughts he's got to go that bad his bladder's ready to burst like even if you go to a doctor and like pee in a cup at the doctor that thing like fills up pretty quick yeah right and then you're still going valid points all around i know and so someone goes as a dude i think a regular pee would overflow a mug let alone if i really had to go and someone goes not to mention the splash there's no way that didn't splash true gross i'm just thinking about people's streams like obviously they splash up and out of the toilet that's why like it's like hitting his face in the wind just like as a piss face i have talked to so many poor attitude and a piss poor face literally and like i think it's interesting for like new parents i've been talking about this a lot with people where they're they're just teaching their sons to sit on the toilet and that's just normal like they're not really gonna like well i always wonder if people sit or stand on the plane because and that's why the floor is wet that's what no because you also get water all over the place from washing your hands that's also very yeah that happens but like i mean but i'm like i was on a lot of planes like it's it's but you weren't in the stall with them no but you had to clean like if the bathroom was clean you had to super untidy on the flight people be like oh the bathrooms and you had to go clean as a flight attendant we don't have mops on those planes you should you should invest in a mop almost at least my planes we didn't have a mop so you'd put a glove on paper towel the floor yeah paper towel didn't come up white clear it was yellow oh like that's piss on the ground yeah that's gross yeah maybe a little water but i think maybe um start sitting down on the plane please i know for everyone's benefit yeah just crazy but um no actually why why is it why is it that it's normal for guys to like is there a better is it like a healthier way i mean i don't know maybe it's just the evolution of toileting because people used to have chamber pots yeah so obviously it was easier for a dude to just and then there's a chamber pot and go into it versus sit and hover on it like a woman and in that china airport that we were in that had just like the hole in the ground and like i just like had to stand over it and i was like what's going on remember yeah you're in the stall next to me and you had like the like you had a toilet that was above ground and i was like how's it going in there and you're like fine and i was like how do i do this i know just an open hole in the floor yeah latrine yeah um yeah it's it's kind of deeply ingrained social norms it's often perceived as being a more masculine behavior though urologists sometimes recommend sitting for better bladder emptying it's also better for your pelvic floor oh you know what i want to get is one of those little squatty potties yeah where you put your feet up because apparently that's supposed to be like good for you getting things all lined up and going yeah i have really bad posture i'm like i need to get that sports bra that everyone's been talking about never heard of that pulls your shoulders back i love that idea reminds you about good posture it honestly feels unnatural for me to put my shoulders back very unnatural which makes me feel like i really need to do something about that because i have back pain in my like left shoulder blade at all times oh my gosh yeah so if anyone has recommendations for that send them lauren's way let me know yeah do we have any like updates or comments no a couple comments from op he was coming home for work 100 not drunk um i would never let a dog lick my plate that's also disgusting they sniff and lick shit all the time why would anyone let them do that and then eat from that plate i do let dogs fully lick my entire face though so that's one thing i love animals but i don't like i don't like dog slobber but i will let a horse lick me so make that make sense well because you're really connected to horses but that's again that's why i feel i'm connected to my dogs i don't know i feel like i don't know horses just eat grass yeah maybe that's it is the like vegetarian in them and dogs are more like meat eaters i'm an irrational person i don't know i'm like you know what i mean like it's like i love self-awareness we're all a little goofy again rare breed um so i don't know but i love my puppies yeah i don't know like i've i know that a lot of people find it gross and a lot of people's people will like yell at their dog when it's licking my face but i'm just like la la la la unfazed unfazed unfazed unfazed unfazed unfazed unless i'm going out and i don't want them to take my makeup off because sometimes they'll like lick my eyeball and i'm like don't do that that's that's gonna get mascara all over the place you let them lick your eyeballs well no that's where the boundary starts is what i'm saying oh my god that's so wild okay let's move on to this next one since we don't have an update or anything else that's fun to share this is coming from r slash am i the jerk 21 days old am i the jerk for not telling my wife for eight years that the coffee she thinks she hates is the coffee she drinks every morning this sounds sneaky let's get into it my wife is going to read this eventually so hi babe i'm sorry but also i'm not when we first moved in together my wife told me she only likes light roast coffee she said dark roast is too bitter and too strong and she can't stand it she was very firm about this so i always bought light roast for the house about eight years ago i bought light roast for the house about eight years ago i accidentally bought a bag of dark roast didn't realize it until i got home and saw the label i figured i'd just drink it myself and get her the right one next time but i was lazy and i made a pot that morning anyways she drank it she said nothing didn't notice at all said it was good actually so the next time i went to the store i bought dark roast again on purpose this time she drank it every morning for a week and never said a word so i just kept buying it for eight years every morning this woman drinks dark roast coffee and tells me how good it is meanwhile if we go to a coffee shop and they ask what roast she wants she says light because she doesn't like dark she has sent back coffee at restaurants for being too dark she has told friends she can't drink dark roast all while drinking it at home every single day last month she was putting groceries away and actually looked at the coffee bag for the first time in apparently eight years this is crazy she held it up and said is this dark roast i said yep she said since when I said since 2017. She did not laugh. She said I lied to her. I said I just never corrected her. She said that's the same thing. I said you've literally been drinking it every day and loving it for eight years. So clearly you do like dark roast. She said that's not the point. She's been buying her own light roast since and making a separate pot every morning. She says it's better. I watch her face when she drinks it and I'm pretty sure she doesn't think it's better but she's committed to proving me wrong. Am I the jerk? Um I mean a little bit like it was eight years of again I don't think it's the same thing but it is in the similar category like lying by omission. I know and a lot of people would be like but it's just about coffee but I'm like it's not yeah I mean it's it's a it's an innocent one right. It's not like crazy but at the same time no one likes feeling like they're getting like a fast one pulled over them. For like specifically eight years. By your husband. Yeah I can't like I can't I could do that for like maybe eight days or maybe eight hours like you know what I mean like I don't know how people just like don't up. Yeah like that so to me I that's what I would kind of be startled by is like how did how did you not. How'd you not notice? Couldn't you like after a week be like what did you think of the coffee and then let let me know like see you do like it like the fact that it went on for eight years is kind of a little. It's impressive. It's it's impressive but that's why it's also a little concerning. A little wrong. I know do you think you wanted the satisfaction of being like you've been drinking for eight years like just that that I got you satisfaction? No I think it sounds more like a lazy thing like he's like well it's what I keep going with my routine until she says something which that just so happened to be eight years later. I don't think that it was like a I'm trying to mess with you. Yeah. Yeah. That's how it reads from my point of view like specifically because like just knowing like my dad I could see my dad I could see my dad in a situation like this just out of pure routine right like you see that there's nothing wrong so you keep up with your routine. Well it also kind of begs the question of like what you don't know doesn't hurt you a little bit. There's certain things about this where like people really stick to their beverages and they think like oh no I know the difference between a diet coke and a coke zero and like I only drank this one and then they do like a blind taste test and it's like oh that's not diet coke that's coke zero see and so I think that concept of like how an expectation of what you're drinking can mess with you is really interesting and it's something that comes up in the comments. So the top comment is she sent back coffee at restaurants for being too dark while drinking dark roast at home every morning for eight years. That's not a taste preference that's a belief system. Yeah right. And someone comments under it to be fair this just proves how much expectations affect taste. If you think you hate something you will convince yourself you do unless no one tells you. Yeah. Yeah it's an interesting experiment. So are they in a bad place now or is he just kind of like I mean he started off saying like hi honey I know you'll see this right so I think it's lighthearted. Yeah there's no update on it. OP has since deleted their account. The post was removed. She was like delete that. Yeah yeah take that down. Yeah. But that's all that's all he wrote. Do is anyone having like wild comments that are things that didn't cross our minds. Let's sort the comments by controversial. Someone goes I think you guys should work on your communication. Not the jerk. I would grin like the Joker watching her stubbornly drink her light roast and ask her how's the coffee now that she knows. Someone responds to that and goes sounds like you guys all hate your wives. Yeah. Someone says stubborn as yours about preconceived food and beverage choices. God forbid that she should ever have to drink a diet Dr. Pepper rather than a diet Coke. You'd think that it would kill her. Dr. Pepper's so good though. I've done some sneaky food stuff to her over the years but I've never pulled a long con like this. Well done. You guys are weirdos. And that makes me now I'm like I don't want him to have this satisfaction. I don't. Yeah. And that's why I think it did go on for so long. Maybe. And I think at first you hey you're at the store you buy the wrong one. OK. But like you continued to go out and buy that one after you kind of pulled it over on her. At some point within eight years it has to just go over your head. Yeah. Like I really I can't imagine each time he goes to the grocery store he was like he he he pulling a fast one. Like I feel like it's got to just kind of become a part of your routine. Yeah. And I think that the people in there are laughing because they've had things that are similar and they're like wow King like you did the ultimate heist for eight years. But I don't feel like that was just his. No. And at the end of the day like I don't think this is really about the coffee. Yeah. It's about the overall you bamboozled me. Right. And maybe as silly as it might seem like she just feels kind of betrayed. Yeah. Like a little just like like you don't I don't know. Like I wonder if you would start to feel like you don't respect me. You've been like bamboozling me for eight years and like making me drink something I didn't like. And I know obviously she must have liked it because she continued to drink it for eight years or on the flip side of this. She's over there like he makes me this coffee every day and I don't really like it but I drink it because he made it for me and he loves me. And you know I mean like on the flip side like we have these two different realities like what is she living. Is she living in one where she takes a sip. Hmm. Thank you honey. And then pours it out and goes and gets another coffee. That would be crazy. Like somewhere else. Like can you imagine if we got the other side of it. I doubt it though. But you never know. Yeah. A lot of people then get into a lie by omission is still a lie. You lied to her every time she took a sip. I'd be mad too. I'd get over it quickly. But the level of anger would be immense. A short burst of how dare he. So yeah you're a jerk for lying to her. She's a jerk for not admitting it. She likes the coffee assuming she does like it. She may have just thought you weren't good at making coffee and was too sweet to say anything to you. So maybe you know he said she'll see it. Maybe we get the other side. Yeah. Let's go coffee girl. We pouring it down the drain every day. Were you pissing in it like the last guy. Hmm. Gross. No. OK moving along. This episode is brought to you by Vinted. Season is changing. Time to clean out that closet and maybe make some extra money in the process. Vinted is a second hand marketplace app where you can sell your clothes you no longer wear and get more value out of your wardrobe. It's super simple to use and with no selling fees. So you keep what you earn. Give your clothes a second life with Vinted. Download the Vinted app for free to start listing with no seller fees. This episode is brought to you by Revolve. My summer has been jam packed with moments where I just want to look cute. And the best way to do it is to find a good fit an outfit that makes you feel confident that feels on trend or reflects your unique style. And Revolve is my go to place to find those fits. I just went to Europe and basically every single one of my outfits was from Revolve and I've never never been complimented more. 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I honestly thought money was a non issue for us. I never was interested in him for his money anyways. We genuinely clicked so well and I loved his personality. We are into the same nerdy things and his family seemed to really like me. I never thought I would have to worry about our relationship going south until now. A few days ago my fiance sat me down and said he had something he wanted to tell me and he was smiling like it was good news. He basically told me that his family has been secretly testing me for the last 11 months to make sure I wasn't wasn't a gold digger. He said they were worried I only liked him for his income, and wanted proof before we got married. The test was that they all made it seem like he was struggling financially and might lose his job. His mom would casually bring up layoffs, his dad talked about how unstable tech is, and slowly it turned into, he might actually lose his job, and you guys might have to really downsize. At one point, his mom even told me I should be prepared to financially help him if it came to that. I never wanted to bring up the possibility of a layoff to him because I didn't want to stress him out. I wanted to be prepared to support him if needed, so I started budgeting more, saving money, cutting back on random spending, skipping stuff that I wanted, and just generally trying to prepare for the worst. I constantly reassured my fiance, encouraged him, told him we'd be fine, that I didn't care about money, and that I just wanted to be prepared for the worst. I constantly reassured my fiance, but this whole thing was fake. His job was never in danger, his income never changed, there were no layoffs, his family literally planned this whole thing together. They kept it going for almost a year. Subtle comments made him passing to manipulate me and test me. Apparently, this all started because his older brother went through a really messy divorce. His brother now pays a ton in child care, and he's not sure if he's going to be able to make it. He's not sure if he's going to and his ex-wife got a lot of money in the divorce, and his family fully blames her and thinks she was a gold digger. So now they're super paranoid about any woman who dates one of their sons. The thing is, I've actually met his brother's ex-wife before. She was dropping off the kids at a family night, and she seemed really nice and normal. I never once got gold digger vibes from her, and honestly, it makes me uncomfortable how much they demonize her. My fiance said that his and that they felt comfortable with him marrying me now. He said he wanted to tell me because he thought I would be relieved to know he actually isn't struggling financially, and that it shows how much his family cares about protecting him. Then he tells me that to celebrate, he upgraded our honeymoon to a nice luxury resort in Hawaii. I mentioned this resort when initially honeymoon planning, but deemed it too expensive, so settled for a more modest option. But I feel weird about it. I don't want to be rewarded for being manipulated really well. Like, good job, we tricked you, and you were so gullible you believed it. Here's a nicer vacation. I told him I felt manipulated, embarrassed, and honestly humiliated that his whole family was watching my reactions and judging my character behind my back for almost a year. He said I'm looking at it wrong, and that I proved I'm not with him for his money, and that should make me feel more secure in our relationship. I wish I could ask my family what they thought. But unfortunately, my mom passed away two years ago, and I don't have a relationship with my father. I'm feeling sad and lost because I don't have a reliable second opinion to lean on. His family had become my family. That's what makes this even harder. His family is acting like this is totally normal and that I should be proud of myself. His mom literally said, quote, most girls wouldn't have handled that so gracefully. I told him I need space, and I'm seriously considering calling off the engagement. But I honestly don't know what to do. I love him, and this is so out of left field. Now everyone is acting like I'm blowing this out of proportion and being dramatic. A part of me wonders if I am, but another part of me feels like my trust is completely broken. Am I overreacting? I'm not sure if tests like this are normal. I feel weird about it. I don't know. Please help. I mean, they're not normal, and she has a right to feel like, everything that she's describing. Yeah. I do, however, though. I haven't been in a place where I have that amount of money. I have that amount of fame. I have that amount of anything where I feel like somebody might be using me. So I don't really know what that feels like and what that experience is. So as much as I'm on her side and agree with how she's, that what happened was really messed up. I also don't feel like I have that much room to speak on what it feels like to question if somebody is only with you because of money. Like, I don't know what that would feel like. So again, it was it was wrong. I just don't know. I don't know how. I don't know. I guess like the thing is, though, I'm very curious his involvement. Me too. That's what because at first I thought he wasn't involved at all. And then you said that he was like, oh, congratulations. So I'm like, did he find out at the end? That's what I'm like. It's somewhat unclear, right? My fiance said his parents finally told him that I passed. But did he know about it from the start? Yeah, I wonder. Because on the flip side to like your parents are essentially telling you like, sweetie, she's not actually in love with you. She's only with you for the money. Let's make sure like your parents are also kind of like giving you this like kind of like backhanded thing as well. Like it feels really icky. I do think it was wrong. I think if you're worried about finances, like there's things like a prenup that would like protect your assets and your your wealth pre marriage. So I don't think you need to pull a year long manipulative lying heist on someone. And the fact, too, she was like, I really cut back on budgeting, did things that I would want to do like that. That sucks. Yeah. And what if her friends went on a girls trip? And she didn't. And she didn't go. Exactly. And a whole year of that. No, it's it's pretty messed up. I don't know. This one's such an interesting one that we haven't come across anything. No, it is like a very rare breed of people. Like it's a very unique problem. Right. Yeah. And it's like I wonder why they didn't think like a prenup. I wonder why that was the I will say, though, culture, maybe geographically, like what part of the world are they in? Yeah. I was like, it feels weird to know that they were all like judging each of my answers and stuff like that. And I mean, the family's doing that regardless. Yeah. But but it's even weirder when they're like all in on it because of a specific reason. But like even if they weren't all communicating on it, like they're still making these judgments in their head based off of your responses to things. So but no, it's it's it's really weird. And that's that's how I'll that's I don't really know. I don't know the advice to give her. Like. I guess what would you I'm curious to hear what advice you would tell her to move forward with. I think you just have to go based on how you're feeling. You know, if you love this person so much and you want to get past this, then you have to have a conversation of like we are going to have stronger boundaries with your parents going forward. Like there's no more tests. And I also think it would really depend on how involved he was in this. Yeah. If he was also involved in this and making these comments to of like, oh, I might get laid off and like also in on this scheme, then I don't think I could move forward with someone like that. It would be really tough. It would feel like it's like the Truman Show where it's like, what is my reality? Totally. If going forward, it's like, oh, I have a health scare. I had a health thing come up. Right. Can you even believe that? Or are you testing me to see if I'll leave? It's it's a crazy thing to cry wolf for an entire year, because how do you build trust on top of that year? How do you not just a couple of months, not like a conversation to see how she'd take it a year? And you make such a good point. It's like, how can she trust him moving forward or any of them? Like, yeah. Again, if he says I have a health scare, is she going to now question it? Like, are you testing me or else that pops up? Or maybe maybe he really is about to get laid off and now she doesn't trust him. So it definitely is a really good way to break trust completely. So if he was in on it, that that would be difficult. I would say, like, if you guys have a strong bond outside of that, then like, you know, maybe try going to couples therapy and and seeing if you can work through it. But again, you know, relationships are are about that trust and and about vulnerability. So unfortunately, like that's we do get into relationships where we trust people and they betray us and we have to deal with it. But to test them up front and like not trust them up front and then betray them and like ruin the trust. That's that's not how you should start a relationship. That's not how you build a relationship. So it's really like they kind of screwed themselves over there, that family and and him if he was involved the entire time. But it's really what she feels. Yeah, we do have a comment. Someone says, you'd think in real life they would have just asked you to do a prenup. Right. Again, like my first thought. O.P. says, the thing is, we have literally discussed a prenup and I've agreed to it. I asked about this when he confessed and he said that the testing was to make sure I'm a morally good person and valued him outside of his money and that he wasn't afraid of divorce necessarily. I feel hurt that he would even question my morality in the first place. I've never given the impression that I'm shallow. It all feels off to me. I would feel. getting worse yeah no i mean i would feel the same way as her but again i don't i don't know what he's been through that has made him come to these places because i'm not rich enough to be in that mindset so i don't know what he's thinking the top comment on this one in their effort to prove you are a morally decent person they proved that they are not right and then next comment they thought she wasn't good enough for him they're not good enough for her since they've made it very clear that his entire family him included is willing to conspire behind her back lie to and manipulate her yeah you found one massive flaw in his personality and it's absolutely one i'd consider a deal breaker so i'm getting the vibe i mean everyone's kind of assuming he is deeply involved and based on the morality thing it seems like he did at least agree to this yeah yeah it's such a bummer so we get an update you guys ready i feel like there was such an underwhelming response we've got an update oh by me yeah i'm just still in my head over this whole situation one one more time one more time we've got an update yay i'm really sorry i've never posted on reddit before i've always just kind of lurked i wasn't sure how i'm supposed to give an update i replied to a comment but i didn't know if that was correct so here is the update thank you all for your comments it means a lot to have so much support and validation i knew right away deep down that this was wrong but i needed validation as bad as that sounds i don't have close family or many friends so hearing that my feelings are normal makes me feel less alone this happened a couple of days ago and i'm still staying with my fiance right now but things are tense and i feel anxious pretty much all of the time he knows i'm upset and knows i need space so he hasn't tried to talk about it since he knows i'm considering calling off the engagement which is why i think he's been so sensitive around me the last couple of days he hasn't been acting like it's a positive thing anymore and seems pretty remorseful since i told him how much it hurt me this morning i asked him if he knew about it the whole time and he told me that his parents started making comments without his knowledge and after he overheard a comment they made to me while over at his parents house he asked them privately why they said that and they explained that they were testing me he decided to let them continue just to see what i would do not good from past interactions with his parents i also know he has a hard time standing up to them or disagreeing with them so it honestly makes sense that he didn't call them out and just started going along with it they told him that they were offended when i suggested an expensive resort for the honeymoon and made a comment insinuating that his parents would be paying for it they got it in their head that i just expected them to shoulder the cost of an expensive resort without question which isn't true i happily accepted a more modest option when they suggested it because i don't want to seem pushy or entitled plus typically the groom's family pays for the honeymoon so i didn't know they were offended by that maybe i really did come off as entitled but that was honestly never my intention regardless i don't think that justifies testing me like this he wasn't the mastermind but he never stopped them and didn't see why it was wrong or manipulative until i told him i was upset and part of me wonders if he was manipulated by his parents to think this was acceptable i'm torn between calling it off or having a conversation with him and asking him to go to couples counseling and set some serious boundaries with his parents yeah i also see some suggestions recommending that i talk to his brother's ex-wife i think that's a good idea but i'm honestly really nervous about it i don't have her number but i follow her on instagram so i'm considering dming her and asking to call her i'm pretty overwhelmed with the attention that this post is getting and i'm not sure if it's a good idea or not i'm not sure if it's a good idea but i'm super appreciative for everyone's support and love i think i have realized i have a people pleasing tendency and i need to keep the peace but i'm trying to force myself to break out of that it's all just really scary and i feel really lonely my natural inclination is to forgive and forget so i can still have a family i know that's not the best idea i know change needs to happen i'm still figuring out where to go from here i'm sorry this post is so long i tried to add my update to a new post but the mods removed it i don't know why okay yeah we got another update let's go update two well my fiance found this post honestly i feel pretty stupid for thinking he wouldn't find it i didn't expect this post to get as much attention as it did so thank you all for that but i was extremely detailed which was dumb he saw the post and immediately clocked that i wrote it he came to me yesterday with the post and i was super afraid he would be angry but he was actually very understanding he said reading the comments was super eye-opening to him on just how messed up this situation was i'm so glad he feels bad that he ever even tried to spin this in a positive light we had a pretty deep conversation and he came to realize that he has been manipulated very heavily by his parents and family when his parents justify something even if it's bad his brain will immediately try to justify it too because differing opinions were not allowed in his household growing up the whole situation has started the realization for him that he grew up in a manipulative and emotionally abusive household but was never given space to realize it because they had an extreme us versus them mentality so even when an extremely normal and well-intentioned person comes into the family aka me and his brother's ex they will do anything they can to invalidate their character because they are uncomfortable with outsiders i've learned a lot about myself through the situation as well first of all i'm emotionally vulnerable i need therapy bad my need to belong has caused me to stay in situations that are unhealthy for me just because i'm so desperate for a family i know that's bad and i know it will be hard but i want to change with that being said even though my fiance was very remorseful and apologetic i told him i want to call off our wedding and take a break from our relationship good for her we both have issues we need to work on by ourselves before we consider joining in marriage i want to figure out how to make sure that i'm not without someone to lean on as painful as that may be and he needs to seriously evaluate his relationship with his family and how they have affected him yeah i told him that if in the future we find ourselves emotionally healthy and the timing works out maybe we can be together again i'm so proud of her but for right now that's not the case so we need to go our separate ways oh my god we still live together and i don't exactly have anywhere to go so my fiance said he will try to find other living arrangements he will pay his portion of the lease until i find another roommate again thank you all for your comments and support the parents are like gold digger they mean a lot to me just kidding that no truly that is such a beautiful wow that is hard that is hard to get to and i'm just so proud of her that she was like i need to make these decisions even though they're scary and foreign and hard and but she knew that was what was best and so wow that's that was a really great update and again like i know a lot of people probably would are probably yelling at me for even considering what the other people like what's going through their head but now we kind of see this it's like more of a glimpse yeah you get more of a glimpse into it and that's and that was my point is that like i don't know what they're doing and again that's it wasn't right what they did i just don't know why they didn't do it came to that like what they've experienced and and it's interesting because i've i've talked to people who have grown up with a lot of money and that wasn't my case growing up and when i when i grew up i used to think that if my family and if i had more money then like all these problems would be solved and there is a lot of manipulation when there is a family with a lot of money like the parents will hold it over the children in so many ways and like when you're a child growing up and then you just feel like oh okay i'm either out on the streets with nothing or i have all of this and they're constantly holding that over you that does something to you so yeah it's like until you're more established and on your own yeah but even when you are you have all of those years of like growing up as a child with with that type of like manipulation and so hearing this it's like i'm not surprised that that's like how he learned to operate and and cope if his parents were constantly dangling money over him and and that it just became normalized for him until he finally had to face the reality which that's why i'm so happy he came across this post and read the comments and could actually see like this isn't normal and you do need to have boundaries and you do need to have get some help and you do need to you know figure out how to get emotionally healthy without leaning on your parents or accepting this poor behavior of of of them yeah this is this is a wild ride absolute wild ride and money can it can make a lot of things in life a lot easier it can also make things you didn't expect harder i i it's interesting i feel like money just can be such a problem for families and especially when it's like with this one this us versus everyone else mentality it's almost giving like this inappropriate loyalty expectation and just like everyone's out to get us like all these new people it's just like oh i bet the brother's relationship didn't work out for him and he's like i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know it didn't work out because of the family honestly yeah so really interesting and i've kind of got another one that ties into it a little bit okay episode is brought to you by Cash App. I myself have fallen for a scam. 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Visit Cash App today and make your money work for you. Cash App.com slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures. This episode is brought to you by Chrysler. Life with kids is basically a never-ending series of plot twists. One minute everyone's buckled in, the next someone's dropped a snack, lost a shoe, or needs a bathroom break immediately. That's why the newly designed Chrysler Pacifica is built for real life. With thoughtful features like stow-and-go seating, hands-free sliding doors, and passenger seating up to eight, it helps keep everything moving. Because family life isn't about perfect moments, it's about making the most of any moment. Visit your local dealer or chrysler.com to learn more and schedule a test drive today. Chrysler is a registered trademark of SCA US LLC. This one is coming from r slash marriage. It's titled, My Wife Cannot Get Over the Fact That My Ex-Wife Is Marrying a Millionaire. Oh no. I don't know what has gotten into my wife. When we met, I was still married to my ex-wife. I'm not proud about it, but my wife started at our job and we slept together after a party. That was about six years ago. My ex found out when she saw nudes on my phone. It broke her and ended our marriage. I married my wife a year later. Everything was fine and my children gradually forgave me and much of it was thanks to my ex who insisted that I was still their father and that I loved my children. They never liked my wife, however, because they've overheard her, my daughter did, talking badly about how fat and old their mother was and how she was no competition. Now, my ex is happily engaged to a man who is very well off. My wife has been depressed ever since she heard that. What an actual bitch. Making comments about what he sees in her and how she feels about him. My ex has been depressed ever since she heard that. Making comments about what he sees in her and how it wouldn't last. Oh my. I hate you. She has Googled everything about him, his net worth, property, social media accounts, and she doesn't stop talking about him. I'm so mad. I got very wary and this last week she's been extra depressed and angry. Not sleeping and she cried several times. When she was finally taking a nap, I took her phone and saw that she has sent the new fiance some flirtatious texts via Instagram. Oh my God. I was thinking this, but I didn't think that we, no. Wow. And, and she even sent a nude. You are such a bitch. Wow. He only answered the first DMs when she introduced herself, congratulated him about the engagement and told him that they were basically a family soon. When she was getting more flirtatious, he stopped answering and her DMs were left on scene. This was last week. I called my ex-wife and she confirmed that her fiance has been receiving these texts and they were embarrassed and unsure what to do. So they ignored her. I confronted my wife and she became very angry saying that I have embarrassed her by talking to my ex. She was crying when I told her that my ex was the one who suggested that they just ignore her and not say anything. Isn't that better for her? She admitted that she sent these, but it was not the right thing to do. She said, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't just because she felt my ex was a bitch that didn't deserve a fiance like hers with a lot of money. My ex-wife would be living in a 19th century penthouse. She also told me that I was the one who drove her to this since she's never felt won by me completely. Wow. That I married her after my divorce was a fact. I made her insecure. I don't understand. I thought we were happy that she was happy. She always told me how she loved me. I feel guilty like I have made her miserable and drove her to be this insecure. But at the same time, I'm very pissed. Well, yeah. There is another comment from OP that just says, I don't know if I need to put ages or if it's irrelevant. I'm 41. My wife is 33. Ex-wife is 43. Her fiance is 40 to 45. I'm not sure. So a bit of an age gap there. They've been married for a long time. I don't know if I need to put ages or if it's irrelevant. I'm 41. My wife is married for six years so wife would have been around 27 at the time when she came on the scene how does a person become like this horrific i don't know what screw is loose in her head and i'm like is she obsessed with the ex-wife but plays it off as secretly hating her i'm like i just don't understand where it's like you won you stole her husband and i know it takes two to tango so he fucked it up as well by having an affair with this co-worker but it's like you got him but now you can't let her have anything she can't have any nice shiny things so you need to try to swoop in there and steal her fiance because if that guy would have been an asshole and started inappropriately messaging her back she would have had an affair with him totally so it's like who are you obsessed with here are you obsessed with that ex-wife yeah or are you so deeply insecure and miserable that that's how you seek any validation yeah both i think she's obsessed with the ex-wife i like i'm actually kind of scared for the ex-wife yeah and i think that she has zero self-worth and so she's trying so hard to find validation in any horrible way possible she she might not have even liked this guy and she might have just wanted to see if she could do it like if she could steal him away insane i mean clearly she doesn't like her husband very much because she's doing this and then she wants more i think she's money social status i think she's now like i don't know seeing this person and it's like well if she can have him i already stole one man from her she doesn't deserve him like someone like him should be with me that would be so messed up though i don't know if she's like if the guy actually took the bait like is would you actually go forward and like date him marry him like wouldn't you feel like i think she would wouldn't you just how do you like you're always a second choice oh my god technically she well she's evil truly evil so someone goes so your mistress is upset that she bet on the wrong horse and has serious regrets i'd re-examine the entire relationship once i found that she had a girlfriend and she had a boyfriend and she had a girlfriend the new fiance with news re-examine no it's over and also this guy sucks too so i don't really fucking i don't really fucking care actually you guys should stay together because you deserve to be we need you guys not to be on the market for other people just stay together goodbye please do everyone else a favor yeah oh honestly i would probably tell her to pack up and leave and then apologize to my ex-wife for her behavior and wish my ex well op responds she swore that she wasn't worth what she's getting and that she ex has been smug and arrogant about it so my wife thought she wanted to give her a wake-up call despicable grotesque human what in the actual fuck she's smug and arrogant no she's probably just happy she who had happy and in love and moving on like oh no like you're such a actual asshole oh my gosh i can't every right to be mad and bitter and like i'm not gonna do this i'm not gonna do this i'm not gonna do this i'm not gonna taint the water well and she told the children she was like that's your dad he still loves you like to have that composure and still like to be so wronged and go forward in such a mature way tactful yeah insane wow wow wow okay well what does op have to say from here um so another comment says i think it's very disturbing behavior that she helped to break up one marriage of this woman a second relationship of this woman there's definitely deep-seated obsession and jealousy as if she is in competition bad talking your ex is also a sign of this i give your ex so much credit in the way she handled your divorce and being able to help your relationship with your kids many women in her shoes would find this very difficult your ex is a saint and i hope you appreciate her your wife needs help and if i were you i would really think hard if she's actually a saint you know i'm not gonna do anything to her and that's got to be tense for you she trash talks your ex that's got to be difficult to deal with and she basically attempted to cheat on you in a sick and twisted attempt to hurt your ex and she did like in a way like sending someone nudes that's stepping out on your marriage at least a little bit yes yeah op responds i know that my ex is one of the most beautiful people i've ever met both inside and out i don't understand why my wife hates her she never once blamed my wife for anything and she was really helpful in making my family and friends not to shun me and my new wife and as i said it is thanks to her that i still have the love of my children yeah op does admit in a comment that they did marry the woman to save face i admit it was to save face marrying my wife that's why i feel guilty now and not just outright pissed i still love my ex and even though i'm happy she is happy again i regret what i did every day i think my wife knows this that's why i'm not as pissed as i should be got it there it is yeah so are you hoping that your new wife breaks up your ex-wife and you get her back or what i think he's just validating the fact that she said you pushed me to this point and he's like well i think about it in my head every day that it's the worst decision i've ever made so she probably can feel that and so she's she's not just throwing that out of nowhere is probably what he's saying damn you know what i mean that's so wild that is wild yeah okay so you definitely need to leave her op and it does suck that you you know made these decisions that hurt a lot of people and that you deeply regret but that's not how you move forward in life you don't just like marry the problem um so yeah i think it's time to go separate ways and do some work on yourself heal move on find someone who actually loves you and who actually loves you and who actually loves you and who actually is right for you um not crazy and yeah but you're you need to clean up your shit too yeah absolutely yeah there's a comment here she's obsessed with your ex did they have a relationship prior to your affair she's absolutely fixated right and op responds no she only met my ex a couple of times before the affair you think she chose me because of my ex question mark because my ex was very well liked in my office amongst my closest colleagues we don't have any children and yeah i think that is why she sought you out yeah i think it was some weird maybe honestly maybe they met at a beauty salon long time ago and then she started stalking her yeah people i don't know i'm like it just is so it's so obsessive it's so weird for sure so we do get enough days hi everyone this is an update about my situation we are getting divorced yep there it is i have had multiple conversations with my wife about what she did but unfortunately she doesn't seem to see how bad it is what she's done she says that she was never interested in my ex's fiance and just wanted to make a point to herself more than to anyone okay and that she still believes she could take him if she wanted she doesn't consider what she did well very serious help because she doesn't consider what she did cheating it was a test oh she said that if she really didn't love me she would have left a long time ago because she can get whoever she wants okay i was speechless hearing her rage and cry but i was done we don't have children and we have very few joint assets to divide she will stay in the house and she will be able to live with me and i will be able to live with her and i will be able to live with her and i will be able to live with her until she can find a place to go but then we are done she is raging and calling me all sorts of names but i guess i'm just so very tired and done thank you all for the wake-up call i know i'm a shitty person but maybe it is time for me to stop punishing myself for what i did my wife was a constant reminder of the damage i have done and maybe deep down i knew she was a bad person but i felt that i didn't deserve better because i'm a bad person too worse even but maybe enough is enough and i need to stop punishing myself i have two wonderful children so maybe i'm not just bad yeah you know it's so interesting like people make mistakes and we tend to define ourself based on our mistakes and it gets so overwhelming and it's also just not right and not fair right to ourselves like we we should be able to like a this guy obviously made a horrible mistake and it was really shitty and it hurt a lot of people and it's not it's not good um but it is something that all of us humans have made mistakes and i think what what matters is and what does define us is our intentions moving forward the past we can't change those we can't change the things that we did that we wish that we could so it's like we were literally talking about this last night yeah like no one's perfect right you you're fooling yourself if you don't know what you're doing you're fooling yourself if you don't know what you're right everyone's flawed it's what's so beautiful about being a human it's like our ability to make mistakes learn and grow from them exactly and so i just think it's like really important for us to remember that that like we can define ourselves based off of the choices that we decide to make in the future like the things that we were doing right now like that's what we need to start giving ourselves more energy towards because we get so hung up on it and who is it good for it's not good for anyone like no no that crash out just spiraling over something that you can't change I know it's really hard I've I've really I talked about it on the patreon like I'm really struggling with my mental health right now and it's it's something I've I you know we all go through spurts and I really really struggled with it in high school to where I like went inpatient for a little bit like a couple days but it was like it was really bad like I I at one point was like suicidal and I just like you don't want to go down the rabbit hole for too many people but I'm now at a point where you know things pop up and I don't handle stress well and I feel horrible and I have a panic attack and so a couple nights ago I you know I'm hyperventilating and I'm like I think I literally need to go to the hospital like I I don't know how to handle this and mental health is so it's so hard and we we get so in our heads and that just it's just a toilet circling and it's just like how do you get out when you're at the bottom about to get flushed right and it's it's brutal and so I don't know where I was going with this but yeah I'm like I just like I feel I feel this so deeply because you know I've gone through it recently and I'm mental health is it's hard but no one has to forgive yourself and move forward exactly and that's why and that's why I'm like making this point too is because I think it's so hard and I don't know how to handle it and I don't know how it can probably relate to for a lot of people like there's like a lot of us do that we latch on to something that we said or did that like we're up at night thinking about how we wish we could change it how it's embarrassing we question if like does that mean I'm a bad person because like I said something that I wish I didn't say and like I just think that we need to give ourselves more grace and and look forward and look at what our intentions are moving forward and strive to do things in the now and let that be the way that we want to be in the future and I think that's what we need to do and let that be what defines you and stop defining yourself based off of something you know that it a moment in time a moment in time that no longer exists anymore especially things you can't change exactly like it's so hard to like not fester on it but you got to like you got to you don't deserve to hold that angst and it's so crazy because like it's like it's like oh talk the talk walk the walk it's like but again that's the mental health of it all it's like we all we all know this but how do you deal how do you become not depressed how do you become not burnt out you know there's resources um I was just looking into this for the patreon but there's emotions anonymous it's just like alcohol anonymous kind of the same principles it's free it's not therapy there's not psychologists but to connect with other people and share and like learn those tools that have helped a lot of people like I think it's a great way to like get out there meet people talk about your feelings feel some some support and yeah it could be a good thing to look into if you you also are struggling well and Morgan was just telling me that and I had never heard of that but it's it's interesting to me because I have a friend who went to AA and she actually said that that like was the best thing that's ever happened for her in her life and not even because of like the alcohol part but like actually specifically because of the way that she was able to heal understand herself the way she's able to communicate with people and and just like when she has really overwhelming emotions like knowing what to do and where to put them and like how to like not you know again not feel like you're in a spiral thinking about the past and thinking you know trying to define yourself by past mistakes and so it's not like it sounds like something that would be interesting to me so I will I will look into that and if I do do that I will report back I know I've really been looking into something called the Hoff Hoffman process. And it's like a week long intensive, like mental health program. And I know a woman that went through it, like she talks about it a lot on her podcast. And it just seems like a total brain rewiring thing. And I'm just like, it's just hard. Like, I don't know, especially now. Like I had someone be like, Are you going to talk about the Epstein files? And I'm like, that's, that's like, I'm out of my depth. Like, I'm not going to talk about something that like, I'm not equipped to talk about. And I'm that's, that is so out of my depth. And it's obviously a horrible, horrible, horrific thing. It's insane. It's insane that, you know, we're we have millions of files being released. And it's like, Oh, here you go. And people are sorting through them. And it's just like, nothing's happening. What the fuck do we do with these? It's that overwhelming paralysis of like, what, like, okay, now I'm overwhelmed. I'm overstimulated. Where do I go from here? They're horrible. Well, and there are there are people that, like Morgan was talking about that she could point you in the direction who really are digging in deep. Yeah, I mean, Annie Elise did a breakdown. I love her. She's genuinely like such a good person. There's Rotten Mango. That's like, basically, like a reporter now going into courtrooms, and she did a deep dive. So there's other creators out there that like, obviously, it's it's fucking horrendous. And like, I think if you know me at this point, you would know, I would think that but this is not the show that would do a deep dive on it. Exactly. There's those. And that's the thing, right? Like we we try to keep this is we want this to be a place where people can breathe, where people can turn it off for a second. So I think it is, it's important to, you know, address certain things going on in the world. But it's also important that, you know, there are places where you can have a breather. And then we can, like point you in directions of where you can be informed. Because, I mean, I specifically am not claiming to be an expert on any of the things we talk about on this, this show. No, and like, you only know what you know, too. Like, I we were talking about it last night, where we were like, I want to do some videos where it's just like, we address like, our early first stories we had, like, literally the first story we ever read. I think it'd be fun to go back watch our takes. I'm gonna cringe so hard. Like, it's just I don't think I can emotionally handle that. Yeah. Maybe after EA. There you go. Maybe, you know, a little champagne support. But I think it'd be fun to like, go back and watch some of those early videos or, or like, react to one of my worst takes and be like, oh, my God, I've grown so much in five years. I'm a different person than I was back in 2021. Like, I've lived more life. There's and there's certain stories. And that's why I know sometimes when I'm like, wait, I didn't actually want to say that. Because there's something that I'll hear in a story that, that triggers me from something that happened when I was younger. But it's not completely like, the story in itself. So after I say it, and I'm all triggered and stuff, then I'm like, oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. But like, back to the story. And that's when I know that's when I'm like, I wish I didn't say that because I was completely speaking from a different lens that no one no one's there with me right now. No one's back when I was like, nine years old and getting pissed about this one certain topic. No, it's for it's coming from a very specific place. This show. Is a lot of different topics that bring out some very, you know, interesting emotions. So that's kind of where we're all at, you know, but Yeah. Yeah. But I hope that that little interlude spoke to some people and maybe I think it will. Hopefully some people found some type of comfort in in that conversation. I know that we totally just went off, off the tracks and off away from the Reddit stories. But hopefully that can, again, speak to somebody. I think so. I think so. Let me see if I can find a bit of a feel good story for us just to send us off on a on a perfect foot, wherever you're at in the world, at the gym, cleaning your house, driving, cleaning that plate with the dog's tongue. Dude, it's fine. It's fine. It's fine for a lot of people. I'm just maybe I have the saliva thing you have, too. Yeah, maybe. But with dogs. Yeah. But with dogs, it's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's It feels good knowing your credit is working for you. When you start to feel like there's too much on your plate, you can count on Credit Karma for less craziness and more credit. This episode is brought to you by Nintendo. Everyone's version of me time is a little different. That's why the Nintendo Switch 2 system is so fun with exclusive and Nintendo Switch compatible games like Mario Kart World, Animal Crossing, New Horizons, Nintendo Switch 2 Edition, Tamodachi Life, Live in the Dream, or Yoshi and the Mysterious Book. There's something for every vibe. And with upgraded hardware, play at home or on the go whenever the mood hits. Learn more at Nintendo.com slash Nintendo Switch 2. Games and systems sold separately. Some Nintendo Switch games may not be supported or fully compatible with Nintendo Switch 2. Games rated E for everyone. Did you find something light and fun? I found something funny. Okay. I think. I didn't read it fully. Can you read it to me in baby talk? The whole way through. This little story is coming from Tiff you? People would actually kill me. My eyes started watering out of embarrassment. Can you do your baby voice? Well, what do you want me to say? Read the title. Today I fucked up by sweeping with someone funny. I'm going to cry out of embarrassment. I think yours was better than mine. Today I fucked up by sleeping with someone funny. I hooked up with a girl at a New Year's Eve party last year. It was one of those spur-of-the-moment sexual encounters that happen when alcohol is involved. We never saw each other again afterwards. Cut to yesterday. My friend sent me a TikTok video of the New Year's Eve girl. She was on stage somewhere doing stand-up. My friend wanted me to confirm if that was the New Year's Eve girl who I had sex with. I said yes. My friend sent me, a million laughing emojis and reaction GIFs before telling me to skip to the four-minute mark. The video was like nine minutes long. At the four-minute mark, New Year's Eve girl said her 2026 started with a bang. An unsatisfying but mildly entertaining bang. Oh. Oh. She said she hooked up with a guy who should never be allowed near another naked woman again. Oh. Because of the following. One, he repeatedly cleared his throat every time he talked dirty. Mm? Quote, ahem, do you like that dick? Two, he extended his arms in a T-shape during doggy because apparently that stopped him from coming in that position. Oh. Three, he farted in silence during foreplay and thought vaping, over the smell, was a subtle way of getting away with it. Clever. Four, he said he was going to come next year, which might have been funny if he didn't clear his fucking throat again. I think it's pretty funny. Five, he grabbed the lamp on the bedside table and made shadow figures appear on her body while she was riding. Stop. You're kidding. She did, remind the audience, I was very drunk, but still. The New Year's Eve girl was definitely talking about me, LOL. My friends have been roasting me ever since. That is beautiful. I need us all to become little detectives. Literally. And find this stand-up video. Yeah. I'm like, I need to see this video. And that's the top comment too. I think every, every, every man needs to, an experience like this. They need to be humbled. I know a little bit. That's really funny. Also, who's the comedian? I'm like, is it? Who is it? OP does respond to give people clues to help find the video. The account that the video is posted on belongs to a local comedy club. The video is on the comedy club's social media. The video was recorded in mid-January from what I know, but the comedy club, reposted it for Valentine's Day. Someone goes name the club in the city. OP is like, because people are like, this didn't happen. Blah, blah, blah, blah. People are like, you forgot to include the link. And now I'm like, how can we find this? I just love that. Like OP got so creative in his, his sexual pursuits. Someone comments, quote, I haven't come since last year is legitimate. Legitimately hilarious. And I feel most comics would really appreciate it. It's all about the delivery. He shouldn't have cleared his throat. throat first well he doesn't want it to come out all gargley i'm gonna do a deep dive on the internet to find this video i thought you were gonna try to reenact it gargley you you know you put the pressure on me to reenact things try things in baby voice you know i would like i would appreciate a little more initiative where you do everything first you always give it back to me yeah because i feel so embarrassed i have to yeah so i thought that was our thing now now you're telling me you have a problem with it i'll do it after you i'm i have stage fright i have stage fright why can't we both have stage fright you have a podcast there's no one here and it's not on a stage you get to edit out the bad parts i don't get to do that i've told you you can edit many times it's not on a stage the grass is not always greener no you said i suck at editing it wasn't good guys i was trying to find the the video but i cannot find it if anyone is feeling in a sleuthy mood today there's got to be someone please have a go at it and then send us her link i'm gonna love that if you guys find that i'm i'm gonna be so proud we find like our next favorite stand-up comedy yeah yes we do love a comic i i think it's great when you bring comedians on here i know i love it taylor tomlinson i love her she's so sweet so fun uh hannah burner our gal we saw her last night again so sweet they're both so witty and like the smart i love i think what i've really grown to appreciate about stand-up comics but i feel like a majority of the women doing it are so smart smart in the jokes they tell yeah and like i think that's my humor and like maybe there's some guys doing it please send me some links um there's a new guy on snl that i really love and he's also from minnesota oh so i've been trying to get him on but i like the i like the comics i feel like they can they have the speed to banter enough yeah on the here no i think that if i were you inviting guests on i would definitely look for a lot of comedians because i do think that there is a type of intelligence with comedians that a lot of people don't even like they don't they don't think about it because they're busy laughing but again yeah to be able to be as quick to piece things together and make people laugh is it it is a type of intelligence you have to be so quick so quick that improv that training they get would you want to go to an improv class with me to sure help our brains work faster yeah okay cool i don't want to go alone yeah i'm totally down okay cool what if you became like the next big stand-up yeah why not i honestly could oh my god i felt my toe out i could honestly see that from you i think like i would have to get over stage fright first beta blockers that's what we're gonna do next time there we go love beta blockers but only if they're prescribed to you talk to your doctor especially if you're having tummy issues colon cancer awareness month but okay that's all we got we're gonna be back with rare breed 2.0 very soon if you see any utter weirdos upon reddit send them our way yeah send them my way and i'll put it in my little folder i have so many good stories i'm like oh i just want to sit here for like two more hours and get through more stories should we just record the other one right now um no you're talking about the other one right now i'm like i'm not gonna do that i'm not gonna do the other one right now i'm not gonna do the other one right now i'm not gonna do the other one right now i'm hungry okay back soon thank you both thank you all just two of you out there thank you to both of my cameras for being here i'm so out of it i'm tired thank you for both of my brain cells for coming through there's not both there's just one there's only one brain cell up there fighting for its life you know like the inside out movie where there's all the little emotions yeah i only have one oh there's only one up there thank you for both of the people listening mom dad really appreciate man love you all if you want more love you guys go over to patreon until next time until next time bye for adults with crohn's disease or ulcerative colitis symptoms every choice matters trimphia offers self-injection or intravenous infusion from the start trimphia is administered as injections under the skin or infusions through a vein every four weeks followed by injections under the skin every four or eight weeks if your doctor decides that you can self-inject trimphia proper training is required trimphia is a prescription medicine used to treat adults with moderately to severely active crohn's disease and adults with moderately to severely active ulcerative colitis serious allergic reactions increased risk of infections or lower ability to fight them and liver problems may occur before treatment get checked for infections and tuberculosis tell your doctor if you have an infection flu-like symptoms or need a vaccine explore what's possible ask your doctor about trimphia today call 1-800-526-7736 to learn more or visit trimphiaradio.com fall never arrives all at once first the air then the light and slowly the things you love begin to find each other a jacket meets a dress a hoodie slips beneath a blazer an old cap finds a new scarf because you don't simply step into the season you create it layer by layer until it finally feels like fall find fall your way at ross