A Blind Date with Madeleine White Fedyk

Hey, everyone. I'm Morgan Stewart, and welcome to The Morgan Stewart Show. I'm going to be talking about pop culture, fashion, my personal life, and just a warning, I will be giving my opinions on everything. And those opinions are subject to change, okay? Now, let's get into it. You guys, I am so excited. I know I start every show off by saying that, but Maddie, is it fetish? I want to make sure I'm saying that. Okay. First of all, I just want to say, I feel like we're on a blind date. Yeah. Do you want to know why? Why? Because you came on my timeline on TikTok. Yeah. Like, out of nowhere. I just started to, like, see your videos. I was being fed your videos. I went to your page, and I saw that you had followed me. Oh, I've been following you for, like, ever. I love you. But I, the reason I was, like, so impressed and touched by that was, like, I kept seeing your videos, and I was like, I fucking love this girl. There's, like, such a warmth. I mean, you know this. There's such a warmth that exudes. But what I was most impressed by was how capable you are. Like, you are such a doer. No, I'm telling you. Like, I was like, this girl has to come on my show. I want to meet her. Because, I mean, the things that you create, the things you're making with your bare hands, I mean, how hands-on you are with, like, everything you're doing. I was like, this is a rarity. This is, like, we don't have this. Everybody's doing the, like, get ready with me, which you do, too. Yeah. But I just thought, like, there's something so different about you and so great. And I was like, I had been following you now for a while, and we had spoken about you coming on. Yeah, and then I had a baby, like, two days later. And then I literally messaged you. Again, last week, and was like, I know this is really last minute because this is how this is. It's all last minute. And you were like, I can fucking do it on Wednesday, and here we are. Here we are. I'm so happy you're here. Me, too. Tell me about, okay, well, first of all, again, I have to just tell you guys, my fancy producer sends me a whole packet of everything with all this different research, dates, how you met your husband, blah, blah. I'm, like, reading it in bed with my husband last night. And I was like, I don't want to know any of this. I want to really get to know you in real life. Learn it live. Learn it live. I don't think that's a bad thing, right? No. Like, I want to know. Start off with, you had a baby. Mm-hmm. Tell me, eight weeks ago. Eight weeks ago. How you feel, and how's it going? Amazing. Love it. Literally cannot ever imagine not having a baby now. Like, truly don't care about anything else. That's it, right? Anymore. Yeah. Like, whenever Alexis, my manager, who's right there, whenever I get a text from them now, I'm like, mm. You don't want to leave. I'm like, I could care about this, but I don't care about it as much as I care about my child. And I think it will be that way forever now. Like, I just love. It's the best thing in the entire world. It really splits. You open in a way that, like, they say and you prepare for. Like, I'm sure your mom probably gave you stories about when you were born. But, like, nothing. I mean, the fact that, like, you have a human being that lives inside of you, comes out of you, and then, like, looks up at you. And looks exactly like you. So does she look exactly like you? Oh, she's me. She's you? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's me. You're so lucky. Except she has blue eyes. She has, like, really blue eyes. It's really crazy. Andrew doesn't have. Andrew has, like, gray, greeny blue. But they're quite striking because I saw your dancing videos last night when I was stalking you. In certain light. Okay. She has, like, blue, blue eyes. So we have that in common because Ro is like that. My daughter is like that as well. Oh, really? And I will tell you, before I gave birth to her, I had a very vivid dream, like, two weeks before, where I had given birth to her and she was upside down. And then they flipped her over and there was light shining from her eyes. Oh, no way. And the moment I gave birth to her, she was on my, like, arm. And I was like, her eyes were this color. And did they say that color? They are the brightest, bluest eyes in the world. And at that moment, I was like, they're not going to stay this color. But it's crazy. So I had, like, an indication they were going to be blue. Yeah. And I obviously don't have. Juliette was born with, like, black, basically, eyes. Really? Like, just, like, shark gray eyes. And then they've lightened in the last couple months. And now they're blue, blue. Did she have hair? Yeah. A lot of hair. She still has hair. And now she looks like a balding man. No, I get it. It's, like, mad thin on top. Yeah. But she still has it on the sides. People say you should shave it so that it grows back in more even. I don't know. But I'm not going to do that. Instead of in baby-like. Okay, so walk me through this whole pregnancy, birth situation. I mean, you obviously got pregnant. You were how many weeks when you gave birth? 33. Okay, is that considered—how many weeks early is that? Six? Seven. I mean, I—so I had a completely normal pregnancy the whole way through. Got pregnant the first time we tried, basically. Same. You're like, what the fuck? How is this real? And then— Were you sick? Yeah, I was sick, but I would say regular sick. Throwing up, like, for three months? Throwing—more just, like— Gagging, heaving. I know that—I'm not kidding. So they say you forget that. Yeah. No, no, no. And I literally tear up every time because I was so sick with my daughter. Because girls make you sick. And the dry heaving that started two weeks— Also, welling up, right? No, two weeks before, I remember we were renting a house in Malibu because it was peak COVID. And I remember being in the toilet and being like, it is the worst. The worst. Yeah, yeah, terrible. The worst. The worst. Yeah. Okay. So—but I would say I had a regular— Pregnancy. Totally regular pregnancy. And then two weeks before I gave birth, so when I was 31 weeks, I got—I literally posted a TikTok on my spam account, taking all of my, like, wedding rings off, my watches. Like, literally nothing fit me overnight. Oh, no. I got really swollen hands, really swollen feet, and my face just, like, puffed up overnight because I really didn't carry much in my face. Like, I didn't look super pregnant. You didn't show pregnancy the whole time, the whole journey. I'm like, she's bad. Yeah. Barely looking pregnant. Fabulous. Right. And so I just thought that it all kind of, like, hit me like a truck all at once in my third trimester. I posted this video, and all of these comments were like, you need to go to the doctor. You need to go to labor and delivery. And I was like, and then my brother's best friend's wife, who is a doctor in the UK— Wait. Brother's best friend's wife. Yeah. Brother's—okay, got it. She's a doctor in the UK, and she saw the video, and she texted me, and she's like, you need to go get yourself checked out immediately because this looks like preeclampsia. So I go. Spend, like, four hours in the middle of the night. Four hours of the night in labor and delivery. Okay. Because I had taken my blood pressure at home, sent my OB the information. He was like, yeah, you need to go. So I went, laid there for four hours, bored out of my mind. Of course. And then they told me that there was nothing wrong with me. Like, it was all negative. Go home. I'm like, great. I'm humiliated. I feel like the biggest hypochondriac on the planet. I am literally never coming back here until I am, you know, full-fledged labor. I was like, I will never be goaded into going back there again because I was so embarrassed. Fucking annoying. And then— Two weeks later, I had—I'd been going into my OB, and he's like, yep, you have high blood pressure. Like, you don't have preeclampsia yet, but, like, you will likely get it. So we're just going to monitor. Wait, what? Is that how that works? You will likely get it? Yeah. And preeclampsia—what exactly is that for people that don't know? Do you know, or is it just, like, a swelling? It's high—it's something in your placenta that gives you high blood pressure. Okay. So that's how they know you're going to get it before you get it is if you have really high blood pressure consistently. And then something happens. I don't really know. But you don't officially have preeclampsia until it tests positive in your urine. So, like, they couldn't diagnose me with it. Oh, my God. Yeah. Oh, my God. And then two weeks later, I went to bed one night with Andrew. He had been in Miami, never slept a wink. He played at Live. Fuck you. Yes. Oh, my God. Take me back to Live. Live on a Sunday? I used to do that. Literally, Live, 11, flight, home. Oh, my God. Put it on me. Yes. Yes. All of it. Went to bed. Yep. And then we watched. It was the day the Euphoria finale aired. What did you think of it quickly? I really enjoyed it. Okay. I really did. I don't know. I'm interested to see if it continues without Rue because I'm like, what? No, we're done. What is Euphoria without Rue? Or Jacob. Or Jacob. Nate. Mm-hmm. Love it. Oh, we'll see. Okay. Yeah. So we watched that. Went to bed. Woke up an hour later. Bed's covered in blood. I. No. No. No. I don't. No. I don't like the blood at all right now. So. No. No. Yeah. So I stood up. Literally woke up Andrew. I said, Andrew, I'm bleeding. He looked at me and he said, what does that mean? And I said, that means we're going to the hospital right now. My guy. My guy. Get the fuck up. Get the fuck up. So I got dressed. Came back out. He's still in his pajama bottoms and his eye mask staring at the wall. Not the eye mask. Like generally just staring at the wall. I said, what are you doing? And he said, I don't know. I don't know. I said, well, get dressed might be a good idea. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So went to the hospital. They. Did. All the tests, everything. They said I was having a placental abruption. What? But it wasn't. Yeah. The fuck? I didn't even know you could have that. Yeah. It's when your placenta detaches from your uterus and you. And what does that mean for the baby? You have to have a baby right now. Yeah. I swear I had enough protein today. Okay. Keep going. Yeah. So then they. But mine was like a partial placental abruption at the beginning. So we thought that we were going to be able to keep her in a couple of days. And so they gave me all the steroids and everything. How are you feeling during this? Freaking the fuck out. Genuinely. Of course. The worst night of my life. Because 33 weeks is like too early to have a baby. Yes. Yeah. But is it. It's not like the worst, but it's very bad. Very bad. Seven weeks ago. Well, what's crazy is I had been at a wedding that weekend and my friend who was getting married, her mom is an OB, and I had told her about my preeclampsia and she genuinely said to me, as a joke, well, even if you had her right now, 33 weeks is plenty. Like, she'll be fine. Had her that night. Holy shit. Yeah. So I thought I was going to be able to keep her in a couple of days. But I, Andrea was supposed to go home and get stuff to stay in the hospital a few days. Oh, no. And the doctor came around because the night doctor decided she was going to wait for the morning doctor to make the decision because she was like, I just don't know what to do. What the fuck is this? Crazy. What is this shit? You don't know what to do. You're at a fucking hospital. Yeah. She literally, no, she literally, I respected that, though. I preferred that than her to make a bullshit decision, you know? Yeah. But if it's not, what if it's like a dire emergency? I mean, you want somebody that knows what they're doing that's like covering that shift, right? Right. Right. Well, yeah. I think if I had been, like, hemorrhaging, it would have been different. I was, it was manageable. It was partial. Yes. But then, then the shift changed and the doctor literally was in my room about, what, like, three minutes. And he's like, yeah, you're having this baby right now. And I had her within 10 minutes of that doctor coming on and doing, like, morning rounds. So, at that, did you have any, oh, my God, that whole story is a lot to digest. And how, okay, so you were freaking the fuck out. Yeah. Were you able to get epidural? Well, they, they just give you, like, the spinal block. Yes. But, so, like, you had time to kind of do all of that. Like, you didn't have to go pain-free. I mean, unless you wanted to do that. No. I mean, a C-section, you can't. It's like. I'm sorry. You had a C. I had a C, emergency C-section, yeah. Emergency C-section. Yes. The baby comes out. She's in the NICU. Yeah. You get to hold her right after? No. I didn't get to hold her. Yeah. Yeah, I held her. She was born at 9 in the morning. I held her at 9 at night. 9 exactly? 9.30. So, you have the baby. You don't get to hold her. And then she's in the NICU how long? Three weeks and one day. Oh, my God. Which is actually great for a 33-week baby. That we were, like, ahead of schedule. Yeah. Okay, so then when did you first get to hold her? 12 hours after she was born. And what was that experience? I mean, it's the best. I know. It's the best experience of your life, but for me, it was also, like, the most terrifying. Terrifying. Because she was genuinely like this big. No. She was so small. How many pounds? And she had, she was four pounds even. Oh, my God. But then she had, like, the oxygen monitor. She was intubated. She had the feeding tube. Like, she had it all. So, it was. It was scary. You can intubate a baby that's four pounds? Oh, yeah. They have to. Jesus Christ. Yeah. But also, like, I guess my daughter was six pounds and she was born at 40 weeks. So, it's not. She wasn't. No, she was actually quite big for her gestational age. Thank God. Yeah. Man. Okay, so you're in the NICU for three weeks. Yeah. How was that experience with your man? Are you taking shifts? Like, how, what is that like? The worst experience of my life. Yeah. Easily. We're going to get to happy stuff, but this is just crazy. Oh, so Andrew had front-loaded his summer. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, he had the busiest month he's ever had in June. Oh, man. He went to Korea. Oh, man. He played, like, 15, 16 shows in June, and he couldn't really back out at that point. So, I, thank God, my mom came from the UK, and she stayed with me the whole month. Oh, we love mom. Yeah. But she was with me the whole time. Andrew, whenever he was home, he was in the NICU with me, but he was gone the majority of June. So, it was just me and my mom. With baby. Mm-hmm. It was really hot. The NICU is not a fun experience. A fun place to be. No. And there's babies. Is she in a room with other babies in little, like? Yeah, yeah. Man. Wow. That is traumatic. Yeah. And so, if you were to have another, I mean, jumping ahead, if you were to have another baby, is that common to happen again? Mm-hmm. Yeah. So, my doctor actually thinks I have some kind of a blood clotting disorder. And so, I'm, like, doing all the testing right now because my mom actually had the same thing with me. Did she? Did she tell you this before? Mm-hmm. Oh, she did. Yeah. I knew my mom had had a placental abruption with me at the exact same gestational age. Oh, my God. Yeah. So, this is, like. Genetic. Were you born early? Yes. Yeah. So, when you were pregnant, did you feel like this was a possibility? No. No. I just thought it was, like, a one-off that happened to my mom, you know? Holy shit, dude. Yeah. But now that the doctors know that, they're like, oh, something is going on. So, this could happen to Juliette. Right. And it could happen with future pregnancy. So, I have to. So, Nick, you tough, and then, you know, you're back home, and you get to love on your baby every single day. Yes. What has been the most life-changing about it? Oh, I mean, she's just starting to smile. Just, like, thinking about it. Oh, it's the best, best everything. I mean. Holding your finger. Yeah. Oh, the holding the finger, especially when she was in the incubator, and that's all you could do. Like, oh. Literally tear my hair out. No, I'm, like, getting emotional for you. I mean, it's just, it's so, you're so lucky to have, like, a healthy baby that you don't have to go. I mean, that is. That is, like, horrific. It's really a miracle what they do in the NICU. It's the worst experience of your life, but, like, the nurses and the doctors that work there are. God sends. Angels sent from heaven. And, like, it's, it was so serendipitous because the nurse that admitted Juliet the day she was born was the same nurse on her last shift before she got discharged. I can't do it. That I can't do. That I can't do. And the nurse actually, and she was, that was the only two shifts she ever had, we ever had her. I'm so happy for you. And I will say, like, even though Andrew wasn't there, and I'm sure that that was hard in moments. Yeah. Like, it probably was. It probably was in a way, like, maybe a teensy bit easier. Like, just to have your mom. I don't know. Like, you want, obviously, the father, your husband, your partner, but they also can't handle. No, they can't. Like, we are, we are, as women and mothers, like, we are born and bred to handle difficult situations. Like, we can handle a lot of different shit. So to go through something so horrific and life-changing. Yeah. and stressful. Oh, I was so grateful to have my mom there. And to be honest, like, there's perks of being in the NICU. You get to sleep all night long. Right. It's not like you have a newborn baby that you have to take care of, so you get to rest and recover and. Can I tell you, that is such a valid thing to bring up, because I'm not even kidding. I remember vividly with my son. I had him literally a year later. And, like, that wake up, that first night. Which, by the way, I think about you often, because it's my worst nightmare. It was. It was not planned. It was the cra. I literally. I mean, I've said it so many times, but it was so, like, wait, what are you talking about? Like, it was. We weren't even. It was just. It was meant to be that way, because it was so not what we were planning. I wanted them close. I definitely didn't want to, like. Yeah. Wait five years. But, so, how far apart are they exactly? They are one year and one day. So, I had Ro February 16th, 2021, and I had Gray February 17th, 2022. So, you had three months of not being pregnant? Yeah. Correct. Not even. Okay. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Not even. See, like, so, like, it would be like you getting pregnant again right now. Correct. Yeah. Like, there's still milk. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, there's still, like, things are still not, like, back together. Right. If you. I wanted to always be pregnant for a certain amount of time, because I felt like, for me personally, like, if I, like, struggled. If I, like, stopped after Ro and, like, waited three and a half years to get back into, like, getting pregnant, it's just almost harder. Yeah. Like, I blacked out. Right. I was literally, like. You were just, like, two years of just. I had a belly for two years. Yeah. There was, like, one week of, like, not being that bloated in between, and that was it. They woke up, and they woke me up after I had given birth to my son that first night, and I was like, are you fucking crazy? Like, feed him. I don't know. I can't get up right now. Right. Like, this sort of, like, interruption when you're at the hospital. Oh, the hospital's horrible for that. Horrible. And you're literally, like, I just pushed out an entire seven-pound live human being. I can't, like, just do all these things. Yeah. Like, I don't have milk yet. Like, can you not just, like, do the night shift and give him a bottle and, like, call me in two hours? Right. It's so exhausting. So, that is the little silver lining that you got, too. It's funny you say that because, obviously, Julia was always in the NICU, and the NICU was run, like, a military operation. So, she was fed. Sorry, how was she fed? Through the tube, but breast milk? Yeah, yeah. So, you were able to pump and give her breast milk? Yeah. Great. Great. So, it's funny because the NICU is. If you are one minute late for that bottle, they will give it without you. Like, they do not fuck around in the NICU. And it's funny because she recently got a completely different thing admitted to the children's hospital, and we stayed there on, like, a regular ward. Okay. Let me tell you, the experience is night and day different when you are in, like, the NICU versus, like, a regular labor and delivery or, like, a regular peds ward. Like, I had to go in there and be like, hey, so, might be time to give my child her medication. Like, just not at all. Like, okay, so, the NICU is, like, we want that. We want that sort of energy. Oh, yeah. Okay, let's talk about the nursery because I watched that entire journey, which is why a huge reason why you're sitting here because I was just like, how are you so skillful? How the fuck do you know how to do all the shit? Do you cook, too? Not really. Do you bake? I do bake. Yeah, she's such a fucking baker. I love baking. You can paint murals, bake, make clothes. Okay, so, tell me about, so, when you got the nursery. Yeah. Weren't you moving away at one point? I'm literally. We were going to move to Nashville, heavily considered it, looked at, we looked at lots of houses, but we just. What was the draw for Nashville? The draw was my best friend was moving, and I genuinely could not envision life without her. Yeah, I understand. Like, it sounds really pathetic and codependent, but, because we don't have family here, right? I get it. It's hard. And she was so, like, my left arm, like, when Andrew was gone, I was just with her and her husband. Where did you meet her? How long have you been best friends? We met in New York when we were both models. Oh, I know. You started at 16. I'll get there. I'll get there. And then she ended up moving to LA. She lived in LA, like, five days. I invited her to my husband's business partner's birthday, and she met her husband there, who was a good friend of my husband. Are you going in and out of your, is the accent going? Yeah, it goes in and out. I kind of love it, but I want you to keep it. Was it around a lot when mom was helping you? Oh, yeah. Because I, it's very. It comes in and out. And in my videos, I have, like, a speaking voice, where I'll be, like, super British, and then. There you are. You're so. Yeah, I can turn it on now. Turn it on. Yeah. Where are you from in the UK? Manchester. Manchester. That's where Matty Healy's from. Do you know who Matty Healy is? Of course. I love Matty Healy. Yeah, yeah. And his mom is, like, very famous in the UK for being on a sitcom that we all watched when we were kids called Waterloo Road. Waterloo. Which Americans don't know. Yeah. Okay, so you, okay, best friend, and then she. So she basically is now married to my husband's best friend. So we're just, like, a little foursome. How convenient is that? It's the best. We went on our honeymoon together, or they came with us on our honeymoon. That's all you want. You know what, because you, I mean, how much alone time do you really need? Right, exactly. It's so fun to be able to, like, hang out and, like, it takes the pressure off, too. It really does. And they were, it wasn't the whole honeymoon, it was only half. Yeah. But, yeah, she would, they were just, like, so my safety net when he was gone, because he's gone so much. Yep. And I just was thinking I'm going to be so lonely, because I obviously don't have my family, don't have Andrew's family. That's really. Where's Andrew from? Toronto. Yep. But we looked, we assessed the situation, decided it wasn't for us. I don't think it's for you. No, it was, it's just too. Yeah, it's just too different. It was just like too different. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, it was like stay put. But she's there now? She's there, yeah. So, are you FaceTiming every single day? Yep, every day. And both of your parents are in Manchester. Do you have siblings? Yeah, I have a brother. How old is your brother? Brother? Two years older than me, 32, 33 this year. Okay, does he have kids? No, not yet. Hopefully soon. Okay, so will your parents do like a little bit of time, will they spend more time here now that there's baby? Um, no. My dad hates LA, like really not just on it. Yeah, okay, got it. But obviously he loves me. Yes, of course. So, they come maybe once a year. Okay. My mom comes more. My mom obviously came for, she came for a month when I had the baby. So sweet. But we normally go back to England for something or other, like I'll get a work event and then we'll tack on some time at the end. So, we normally go there at least like twice a year, so. Will you do dual citizenship for? Yeah. Three, try. Try, yeah. Because Canada. Okay, let's talk about your start. Let's talk about modeling at 16. Mm-hmm. You were discovered. That's when I first started to read the research and I was like, I want to talk to her about this. Yeah. So, you're living in London. Manchester. Yeah. How far is Manchester from London? Well, we have a great public transportation system. Oh, I know, I love it. In the UK. Love it. So, on the train, two hours. In the car, six hours. Jesus. Yeah, yeah. Way different. Okay, so where did you get discovered? Tell me about all of that. I worked at Hollister in the mall and then I got scouted by my, she's still my agent to this day. Shut the fuck up. Yeah. So, she came up to you and said what? Mm-hmm. You're gorgeous? And she, I was like so young that she was like, hey, I'm going to talk to mom because I don't want to seem like a weird. Creepy person? Yeah, creepy person. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And just said like, hey, if you, I was tiny at the time. I was like 5'3 or 5'4. Like, I hit puberty very late. How tall are you now? 5'10. Wow. Yeah, I was still like, I wasn't even in puberty yet. I, and she looked at me and she looked at my mom and saw how tall my mom was and was like, have you ever considered putting her into modeling? How tall is your mom? 5'8. Okay, okay. Yeah. Yeah. And so, obviously, begged my mom. Thought it was the coolest thing ever. I had been scouted once before. Oh, my God. You were made for modeling. Yeah. My mom had said no. And I was like, literally, just belligerently, please. Yeah. And so, obviously, she let me. And then, timed it perfectly, shot up within two years to like, obviously, how tall I am now. That is so crazy that that woman even like knew that that was possible. Oh, yeah. I mean, I can now spot it also. I'll see little kids like out and about. And I'm like, oh, that's, that's one. Really? Oh, yeah, yeah. That's one. That's hilarious. Like, what is it about them? Like, hands? Just like the lanky? The lanky. So, you were lanky. Oh, hella lanky. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And by the way, I didn't even know Hollister was in the UK. Oh, yeah. I thought that was like an American. Like, that was ours. I thought that was ours. Yeah, it is American, right? Yeah. I know about Hollister. Yeah, yeah. Right? Yeah. Okay. No one rushed to answer as I struggled to fucking find out. Brendan, don't worry. I don't need you anymore. Fucking crazy. Okay. So, she shot up. And then, so, where do we go from there? Once mom says yes. What's mom's name? Sally. Of course, it's fucking Sally. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, she says yes. Did my first test shoot. That then gets sent to Models 1 in London. Oh, my God. Again, still my agent to this day. Okay. I was placed in New York, Paris, Milan, London within like two months. Bitch, you are a model. Oh, yeah. I was. People are like, oh, ha, ha. Like, you're a model. I'm just a fucking model, babe. You're a fucking model. Yeah. Insert some shots. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want some shots at this point. The B-roll. So, what does placed mean? Like, you're basically sent out for like, what does that mean, placed? So, basically, when you have your first modeling agent, they then place you with other modeling agencies throughout the world. Around the world. The world. Yeah. And then, they then start getting you work. And then, you will go for like two months, work in that market, get photos. And then, the idea is you basically expand like globally. So, you have somebody looking for work for you. All around the world, basically. All around the world, yeah. Okay. And then, how, what was the first thing you did? Where you gained? But, first of all. First of all, you're in high school. Right. So, how does that work? Tell me all about that. So, I changed schools to a, what we call a college in the UK, which is kind of like supposed to be in the middle between high school and university. Is that where Prince William and Harry went? Definitely not. But, like, it's the same, like, it's college, right? Yeah. Anyway, keep going. Sorry. I was like, okay, we don't care. I love that segue. Yeah. Yeah. So, I transferred schools so I could work one day a week and then do school four. Oh, so, this was like. Going from Hollister to begging mom to literally being full-fledged, like, we're changing fucking schools here. Went to New York for the summer and stayed in the model apartment when I was 16 and a half. Fabulous. By yourself? Oh, yeah. Wait, what do you mean? So much fun. I loved it. You were six. So, mom was like, you can go to New York by yourself, stay for the summer. She, well, she came with me. It was a chaperoned model apartment. Okay. So, there was a, supposedly a chaperone living there with you. So, she came and, like, checked it out, got me settled. By the way, the biggest con of all time. 10,000, how much did I pay? $3,000 a month for a one bunk bed. No. With. Robbing you blind. Nine other girls. Shut the. Two-bedroom apartment. When I lived there in 2009 or whatever, eight, I paid $3,000 for rent. Yeah. And it was, okay. No, it was insane. The amount of highway robbery going on and there was modeling agencies with those model apartments is disgusting. So, did your parents have to pay for that? No, I had to pay for it. And then they take it out of your paycheck when you start working, yeah. Yeah. Okay. So, you go to New York for the summer. You're 16. Tell me about some of those memories. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because I know it was fucking wild. Oh, I mean, it was so much fun. My first summer when I was there when I was 16, I didn't. I was so young. I know. I can't believe this. Like, I was cleaning up in the, like, teen market, like, doing Claire's. I did, like, three Claire's campaigns. Are you still 5'3"? Am I still 5'3"? No. Then. Oh, oh, no. I was a bit bigger. Maybe, like, 5'5", 5'6". Like, I'm getting there. You're growing. You're literally growing. I'm very much on the, what they call the new faces board. I'm, like, in development. I'm doing the, like, teeny stuff. Made really good friends. Literally had the time of my life. Was so fucking annoyed when I had to go back to school in September. Right. And then from then on, it was, like, there's no way I'm not doing this. The moment that I. Started. Graduate and finish school. So, I did. I can't remember if I did the first summer in New York and then the second summer in Paris. I did one in Paris, one in New York. This is so. I'm freaking out. I'm literally, like, want to do my life over. Yeah. Okay. And then, genuinely, even, it was actually before I graduated, I had, in England, we do, like, exams where you don't have to go to school anymore. You just, like, study at home and then you just come in for the test. Fabulous. I was already in New York. Just came home for the test and then went right back. Where were you living in New York? What part of the city? I can't remember if I was still living in Times Square in the model apartment or if I had gotten my promoter apartment that I lived in. Fuck yes. Oh, my God. I love it. I lived with a promoter for, like, two years. Which, by the way, pay rent, which is a very important thing that you, I did pay rent. Okay. In, like, mid, where'd you go? Where did I live? Like, Chelsea? Okay. Okay. But, yeah, I lived there for two years. And then, what are you doing at this point? Like, we're still teen market? Um, I, well, by the time I graduated high school, I looked still very young. Okay. But, like, I think my goal, which I did one shoot for them and then they never asked me back, was, like, a VS Pink type vibe. But I was doing, like, a lot of e-com, just, like, you know, just, like, shooting Nordstrom website, all that. Like, that's how I paid my bills, paid my rent, et cetera. And then, whenever I was not doing that. I was in the club. Of course you were in the club. Tell me about the clubs. What clubs were you going to? Oh, I was in the club. Oh, I was, um, so my promoter that I lived with, he worked at Up and Down and at One Oak. So, I was going there, like, four nights a week. We were literally crossing paths at this point. Okay. Okay. One Oak was literally, I mean, we were there until four o'clock in the morning. Yeah, yeah. And then we had that disgusting pizza next door. What was that place called? Oh, Artichoke. Yep. Artichoke, literally choke. Gross. Like, the amount of pizza I've had, the amount of pizza that I've thrown up. I even had a door guy, a guy that could get me into Artichoke pizza, because we went so frequently. Okay, so you're, okay, so you're a club rat. So, wait, you're still 16? No, you've graduated? No, I'm, like, 19. And you're in New York. Yeah. And how long are you in New York, then? I lived in New York until I was 21, so, like, two, three years. But I was also traveling, so I was, like, based out of New York, but then I went to Australia for two months. I went to Tokyo for two months. I went to Milan, back to Paris, like, used to sort of, like, bopping around, but my home base was New York. Okay, what was your favorite kind of job? To do, like, photo shoots, econ, like, what was it? What was the biggest thing you did? What was the biggest thing? I mean, I did, I mean, I did tons of, like, big campaigns. I remember I went to Switzerland, and we went on the top of the Matterhorn to shoot for Timberland. Oh, my God. Which was really sick. You know, first of all, my mom is Swiss, so that's, like, a dream. It was sick. I went to the Matterhorn as a kid. I have a purple t-shirt. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It was so cool. And we had, like, we were shooting on, like, a separate situation that they had to, like, get special permits for. It was really cool. Wow. I'm trying to think. How old were you then? Like, 20, 19 or 20. How long did you model until? Um, I modeled until I was 23, 24, basically until I started TikTok. And then I retired. Okay, let's talk about that. Yeah. 23. First of all, you could have modeled a lot. I feel like. I could have modeled a lot longer. I was just making more money on socials than I was modeling, so I was like, why? And the passion just kind of faded. It was more. Modeling's a really tough industry. It's really not fun. It's, I, like you said, I'm such a doer. You are such a doer. I had a really hard time with, there's nothing you can do to be more successful as a model except for just, like, wait and, like, go to the gym and there's just sitting around and hoping that somebody thinks you're pretty enough to book you. Jesus Christ. And that's really not fun. And that's what I always struggle with the most. So as soon as I found something that I could make money at that I could actually do and, like, work on while I was at home and use my time to excel myself, I was like, oh, this is, this is for me. Okay, so we're putting modeling down. Yeah. We're picking up the top. Yeah. How does that happen? What's that transition like? What's that journey like? My first viral video was FaceTuning Andrew's forehead bigger. I saw that. Until I noticed, yep. I saw that on my research. So you, wait, no, no, no. Then we, I'm sorry. This is such an un, when did we meet Andrew and how did that happen? We met in 2020, COVID. How did you meet? We got set up, sort of. It's like a, you know, it was like a 2020 sort of setup where it was like my, I was asking my friend, I'm single, I'm miserable. Who can you set me up with? She's like, oh, what about Andrew? I'm like, eh, maybe. Maybe. Did you know who he was? No. Okay. So that he already followed me. Oh my God. And then I was like, oh yeah, text him. And so then he like DMs me on Instagram and I like respond and we go to dinner like the next day. Where'd you go to dinner? Barrique in Venice. Oh, Venice. So cool. Okay. So then when you had dinner. Yeah. Were you like, this is it? Yeah. I would say so. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, Andrew's a real talker. Oh yeah. A real talker. Very chatty guy. And so our first date was like a quadrillion hours long and then I was just obsessed with him and I'm like, oh. This is it. Yeah. And he was messy. Messy, messy, messy. Oh yeah. What was he doing? How was he fucking messy? I had three or four separate encounters in the like two months when we were sort of seeing each other before we were boyfriend and girlfriend where I would speak to girls in my like social periphery and be just like talking about your dating life, you know. And then I would realize that the guy that they were talking to was also Andrew. Three times. Yeah. So what the fuck did you do? How'd you handle that? Were you like, don't? Well, they were all, it wasn't like they were all currently talking to Andrew and they weren't close. These were girls that I barely knew or had like first time meeting them or whatever. But how kismet that you're like meeting the same girls. That's crazy. Yeah. Well, Andrew has a type. They, he very much has a type and they all look exactly like me and they were all models and they were all like one girl was with my same agency. Holy Andrew. No, no, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So messy. So, okay. You got a few of these. You got a few of these stories and you were, what happened? Did you confront him or how did you guys become? Oh yeah. Oh yeah, you fucking did. What did you say? Were you like, if you fuck around. Well, so, well, the first incident was we went on two dates. Second date. Cause obviously like, I can't, I can't be like, you're done after two dates because you're seeing other people. And you loved him right away. Two dates. Yeah. Went on two dates. He told me he was going on a riding camp for two weeks and that he wasn't gonna be able to see me. So I'm like, okay, weird. But like, whatever. I don't know DJs like that. I don't know. I guess that's normal. And then. It's not normal. It's not normal. And then my friends kept seeing him at the gym, at parties. And I would be like, hmm, that's fucking weird. Like, he never told me he was going out of town. He just told me he was going to be on this like riding retreat. Oh, I love women. We're all like, but he didn't say this. He didn't say that. And then my friends kept like seeing him at parties and stuff. And I kept being like, hey, like I would love to see you for an hour if you're free. And he'd be like, I would really love to see you, but I just like can't leave this riding camp. I met at my friend's house in Malibu and I see Andrew is posting on his story from Nobu Malibu. Genuinely. One second away. And I'm like, oh, I'm like, what's happening? I'm like, oh, you're in Malibu. You should come by this party. Oh, so you're still like being nice to him. I would have ripped him apart. By the way, he's on my ass 24 seven on text. Like he's texting me. You forgot to mention that. Oh, no, no, no. He has texted me novel after novel after novel. Like I just will not leave my ass alone over text. See that he's in Nobu Malibu. And I'm like, oh, my God, you're right there. You should come to this party. You should come. And he's like, oh, I can't. Already heading back to. He lived in like we have my friend. Can't the same Andrew. You're pissing me the fuck off. The same friend who had set us up went to Nobu Malibu after that with her boyfriend, who was a good friend of Andrew to dinner. And she texted me. She's like, you're never going to believe this. Andrew is very much on a date with this girl who I had previously seen at a party with Andrew like the week prior. Girl, I wish we had fucking popcorn. I can't believe you have a plastic water bottle. We have to start bringing water. OK, so he's on a date. He's on a date. She had same friend had previously seen him with her at a party prior in the week. Makes a connection and is like, I've seen him with her before. So I I text him. I'm like, OK, the jig is up. My guy. Like, I know you're not on a fucking writing. I would. OK, he had a I feel so bad for her to this day. He had a girl visiting him from the Netherlands. Not the Netherlands. Not the whole. Last Netherlands. Visiting him from the Netherlands for two weeks. And when we had met and gone on our first date, she was already quarantining herself in Mexico so that she could get into the United States. And he said that he felt too bad to tell her not to come anymore because she had spent all this money staying in Mexico for two weeks so that she could come and visit him. Yeah. And so obviously I was like, OK, I'm good. I'm going on. Yeah. And then. So I was like, OK, I didn't care that he had this girl visiting because we'd gone on two dates and like four days apart. Like you didn't he didn't owe me anything at the time. Yeah. But I care that he lied about it. I totally understand that. And then he spent weeks and weeks just groveling. So you basically were like, do not speak to me anymore. Mm hmm. And then he groveled and groveled and groveled. And eventually I was like, OK, it was only two days. Like, I will give you another chance. We joke all the time that he is so blessed that he met me when he did, because I would never put up with this level of. Fuckery. Fuckery now. OK. So you go on it. Go on a third. How much longer after do you go on your third date? And then how soon after that are you like together, together? A few weeks. And then after that, we're together. That was it. I don't know. Yeah. And were you like, listen, if you try it on my time one more time. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. He's terrified of me now. Yeah. Yeah. He is. Oh, he should be. He should be terrified of me, too. Yeah. OK. Now we're out in this whole audience. Everyone that's going to watch this like Andrew's not going to have a second. No. Wow. Together, TikTok. So what happens? You just open the app one day and you're like, I'm going to just fuck with Andrew. And then it goes viral. And how viral are we talking? Like five million views, maybe? Oh, my God. What am I doing? You know what I do on TikTok? Not go viral. That's my goal. I'm like, you don't need to go viral. No, I think I do. Because you know what's actually a lot more valuable is just having an audience and going like a viral Mimi video doesn't actually do anything for you. OK, good. OK, good. Good. So. Are we sure? Maybe one. Because I literally don't ever go viral. You don't? You don't need to go viral. I also don't try to and I wouldn't even know how to. It's like, well, this was so long ago. Like now it's kind of lame to try to go viral. I know. Yeah, obviously. I was kidding. Not that I would ever fucking do that. So six years ago, you went viral. Went viral. But totally unplanned. I mean, it just happened. Or did you have an idea that it was going to happen? No, it was planned in terms of I loved watching TikTok. My modeling agent had been like, hey, you are not getting any fucking work. You need to do something to try and generate a little bit. And I'm like, OK, TikTok is popping off the new thing. Yeah. Let me try and see if I can get some followers on TikTok and try and see if I can make a go of this because models are starting to get booked because they have large TikTok followings. Oh, my God. It's crazy. So I and this was also a very different time on the app. It's 2021. This was when you got one viral video. And then if the next one was even semi good, that would also go viral. And the way the algorithm worked at the time, it was like so easy to. Yeah. Because they wanted people posting. They wanted people to get. They wanted people to get famous on the app. They wanted more Charlie D'Amelio's like they wanted. Right. So that was the time of all of that. Alex Earl was during that time or later. She was not even doing that. I was later. OK, so I got a million followers within like three months, four months. Holy shit. Yeah. And then you just kept going from there. Yeah. Talk to me about just like you knowing to do everything. Like, how are you painting your baby's room? And like, no. How do you know how to sew clothes? Like how? How? That is like that's not a normal skill. You know that, right? The painting thing. I don't think it's anything crazy because I have a projector that I was like tracing. Still, if I was tracing things in my baby's room, I would not be able to do anything. You put you painted like a beautiful mural for your baby that like, no, that is not. And also like you're choosing to do it. So have you always been painting? No. So what do you mean? Like you just like decided one day that you're painting and it's perfect. Pretty much. I haven't painted since I was in high school. And then I was like, I want to paint my daughter's nursery. And it was my first time picking up a paintbrush in 20 years. Not 20, 10, 15. And it's literally beautiful. And what is the mural of? It's like flowers and everything. I've seen it, but like. I just wanted like a woodland pink because I had found a wallpaper I really liked, but it was blue. And I was like, no, no, no. I don't want to have a blue room. So I was like, let's do this, but pink. And then let's take it a step further and put in all the little creatures from the kids storybooks that I want and her pets and all that. And it just kind of. It just kind of slowly grew into what it became, which is a full fledged mural on every single wall of her nursery. You were like out to here, like literally painting that room. Yeah. That is insane. Was it done when the baby came? No. Not done. And so have we finished it since? It's still not done. It's still not done. No, my side is done. We're still doing construction on her closets and stuff, but I finished it when she was in the NICU. Okay. And then what about clothes? Like when did you, that's when I really, you caught my attention when you were like making all of these dresses and all of these clothes. I was like, what is happening? Like, how did that happen? Yeah. That was, that was, I learned how to sew in COVID because I obviously wasn't modeling anymore because everything was shut down, needed something to do, didn't have any money, needed like new clothes because I was like a hundred pounds. I was like so skinny and emaciated because I was just like so stressed out in my mind, not in my clothes fit. I'm like, okay, I would like to know how to sew things because my mom can sew. Yeah. Everyone's mom can sew. Yeah. That's like in their training from school when they were young. So I just bought, sorry. machine on Amazon for like 30 bucks and I was like oh if I can just thrift flip and buy things from the thrift store and make it smaller and make like tweaks to it I'll be good and then I started wanting to make my own bathing suits because bathing suits were like way out of out of price range for me at the time so what is that okay so did you so you went and bought fabric and you literally yeah did you watch like a tutorial online like on YouTube and I made a bathing suit and then I started making other stuff and just if I can find a grandma that's got like 200 views of something I want to know how to do I will do it do it and you love it yeah and do you make how much of your clothing do you make it's only for special events yeah yeah what about baby clothing I have made one dress for Juliet but it's ginormous I don't think she's gonna be wearing it until she's like two a long time okay and what's your favorite kind of content to make on the app now we're going in all different kinds of directions I love it see I'm like I love what I do now because I feel like I have my toe in so many different buckets that I don't ever get bored of doing one thing so like I love making the sewing videos but I would actually lose my mind if I didn't do it I would lose my mind if I didn't do it I would lose my mind if I didn't lose my mind if that was the only type of content I was making it would could perform because it's so labor-intensive it does feel very everything that you do post does feel very different from that yeah like it feels and then alive right and then I love also making the get ready with me and and going to events where I literally just bought something that I think is fun that people will engage with I love just making like random vlogs I I love that I can keep it interesting enough between all the different types of videos that I make so I never have to get bored of doing one obviously selfishly I love making like a morning vlog because the level of lift on that is like zero I just film my morning and hit upload but is it because I feel like for me it's really hard to do that like I feel like you need to like are you doing it from the moment you wake up from bed yeah I mean not always but I am not cute at that point but that doesn't matter right that's the point so my controversial opinion is that you not looking cute actually makes the video perform better people love to see that people want to see real shit yeah they don't want to see real shit they don't want to see like curated manicured life anymore no they want to see what's really going on yes you're not going to show baby you're not going to show Juliet on social ever I show like the back of her head and stuff yeah I'm not going to show her face not I think people have taken the not showing faces thing a bit too far like I don't I don't think people are as obsessed with your kid as as you think people are obsessed with your kid for a lot of people however I hate the idea of somebody recognizing her especially if she's not with Andrew and I and being like that's Juliet that that is a really good thought because I I don't post my children that frequently I mean I've posted them throughout their life when we they were first born I definitely did not post them and then we kind of just like at some point they are there and they're a part of your life and like maybe your feelings change about it but there have been times where like my nanny has taken them to the park and like people have like said like oh is that and that I will tell you I hate that it's very weird and it's just like and they didn't ask to be a part of anything this is not the life that they chose so I think that's a really smart yeah way to go about it I don't think that just posting your baby innocently is exploiting your baby like people will say it is no I don't believe that at all yeah like okay another thing that I want to talk about well first of all because I'm staring at this wedding photo of you how long after you dated did you get engaged three and a half years okay three and were you like tick-tock oh yeah yeah you're like where the fuck is the ring how did he propose uh this like they also they call it a castle in Toronto but in England we have a very idea different idea of a castle you have really old castles 50 years old is not a castle yeah yeah yeah you're talking like it's absolutely beautiful okay yeah yeah yeah and did you know what's happening yes oh yeah oh tell me okay so you were like this is the ring this is what I want we had gone to design the ring together in June July it's now December I know like I'm like obviously you have the ring and you're just like torturing me right right right right um and then they he's like get ready and I'm like for what and he's like I don't know I don't know I don't know and just walks out of the room okay it's happening so I get ready the car downstairs is like a Maybach I'm like oh god normally this man is ordering an Uber X yeah yeah okay yeah this is we're game on and then it was like this like it was beautiful it's like a castle in Toronto and it has a restaurant but it also he had rented out like the conservatory it's like all glass and had it all done Andrew yeah yeah it was really cute and he actually did get me because he had said that we we got there and the server at the front had said like oh we are still preparing our table like would you like a tour of the castle while we've had the table and I'm like sure I'm thinking we're gonna get engaged at dinner and she did a really good job she took us to a few different like stately rooms that still had the beds in and stuff and you're kind of like let's go hurry this shit up I'm getting engaged yeah yeah yeah and then she takes us into the room that's all decked out for our engagement and I looked at them and I was like wow you guys really go hardcore with the Christmas decorations and then I see Andrew just like sweating crying taking his coat off and I'm like oh oh we're happy it's happening now yeah okay so then he proposes you have dinner it's all magical yeah I want to talk about your wedding your wedding dress in particular was so you it was so me yeah whole I mean everyone like says that but when I saw this photo last night and I had obviously seen it on socials that is you in a dress right it is blooming right who made the dress victor and roll I okay so there was like a few dresses that she had sent me like the designers up and I was like is it victor and roll but then it was like very them because the perfume you know they do how did you find a victor and roll I feel like that's like a random it is random no I'd seen the dress on um tiktok literally had seen it years prior had always been in my mind it's like that's me in a dress that's you in a dress I swear to god I'm looking at this photo and I'm like there is no other dress that you could have worn yeah me in a dress and so it was the last dress I tried on I had tried on like probably 100 dresses it was hard and because it was old it was old it was like a 2000 18 or 19 something like that it was it was um not like their current collection okay and so I was just like I just need to try the dress on just to get it out of my head tried it on that was it I was like this is the dress what can we do to make it sort of like demi custom semi custom how did you track it down you got in touch with them did you manager stepped in yeah yeah I think you just emailed how long have you guys been working together her manager's in the room so now we're chatting four years I mean yeah kind of really popped off wow okay yeah I like that you stick with your people yeah yeah yeah very loyal Scorpio Scorpio it's true Scorpios are so and they will remember everything okay so you tracked it down you tried it on you were like this is it yeah everyone my mom was like that's the one that's the one Alexis was like that's the one that's you in a dress that is it really is yeah okay and so then at what point were you like I'm gonna make all of my bridesmaids dresses myself uh because that is when I looked at bridesmaid dresses and I couldn't find one that I remotely liked how many bridesmaids did you have three that's why again it was it was manageable because only three oh yeah obviously only three dresses to me so I would have done that too like so easily so you couldn't find it and then you were like I want blue baby blue yep and all the girls came in and you measured all of them and you yeah I mean it also helps that my three bridesmaids were all models because that's where I'd made my friends you know what I I need to I need to have a vow of renewal I only want fucking models yeah I don't need these real friends of mine I like fucking models behind me so I have beautiful photos I got like hate comments of people being like of course you don't have any size diversity in your bridesmaids and I'm like I I literally left home at 16 years old and my only social interaction with anybody for a decade was other models that I would meet on set at parties fabulous fucking fabulous I live because I was looking at these photos last night and I was like wait I didn't even realize that they were models but I'm like everyone's so beautiful like it's just aesthetically it's what you want well that wasn't why they were my bridesmaids at all they were just those were my closest friends closest friends because I didn't those are the people that I would see at work and living in my apartment with me and all that for my entire 20s like of course those are your three bridesmaids okay and those are your three best friends to this day so you how long did it take to make each dress like that is crazy I got better as as the first one probably took me like three months and then the rest I could like bang out after I figured out how to do this one yeah and then how many fittings did you have to have with each girl two or three two not that many because it was corsets it was also like easy because a skirt and of course it is it doesn't actually have to fit perfectly because you can tighten it or loosen it as much as you want insane they were everything was so beautiful the whole wedding was so beautiful but I also remember first night you went a little hard were you hung over what happened there I can't remember I was like you were just so hung over no I so I I did go I tell all my friends this again it's the welcome party welcome party I you got married in Greece got married it's gonna make sure Maddie doesn't get too fucked up at the welcome party what's your what's the drink of choice so we had this pink drink oh that's salty spritz that like match the rest of our decor no lethal yeah and the problem was that merit also got too fucked up and so merit where you at merit this is your fucking job I'm pissed at merit is merit the one in Nashville merit uh-uh but we did the problem was we did have the sense to cut off like we are done but then we so but it was too late like it was you were like we're done I wasn't the worst hangover I've ever had my wedding on my wedding day at all it was just like enough for me to take a zofran yeah uh did you ever take those pregnant no I never actually did because because of the experience that I had on my wedding I'm now terrified of zofran what happened because I I took a zofran because I'm I'm I'm hung over but nothing crazy Andrew meanwhile has the worst hangover his life because he went to bed at seven o'clock in the morning of our wedding he was in I got I woke up at seven o'clock in the morning I woke up at seven o'clock in the morning I woke up at seven o'clock in the morning I woke up at seven o'clock in the morning I woke up at seven o'clock in the morning I woke up at seven o'clock in the morning I woke up at seven o'clock in the morning I woke up at seven a little nauseous pop another day goes on everyone's trying to give me drinks it's my wedding day have a have a champagne you're like getting ready at this point right yeah mom everyone's there yeah still not really hitting pop another no no I don't I don't like the idea of popping anything at this point myself what I can only describe as like a heart arrhythmia or like a permanent panic attack on my wedding day my heart like this all day long so I just keep like and I feel so fucking nauseous my dress is like so tight so I just keep taking zofran no no how many fucking zofran did you take was no one there to say no no nobody knew that there was a nobody knew that it was a bad side to like popping zofran because the only bad side I was aware of is that zofran makes you constipated but I was that's okay you're like we don't need to be shitting today well I was like I I had the opposite problem so I'm like right I'm free and free and in the clear I can keep taking my zofran okay so you took how many zofran maybe like four or five no no no no no no no at what point in the morning what time in the morning did this start oh this is throughout the day yeah but what when's the first zofran zofran's taken at like nine o'clock when glenn comes oh glenn's at nine after that night brutal brutal so by the time by the time ceremony starts I've had like three or four zofran no my heart's like thumping out of my chest I tell I mention this to um Andrew's best man or like his best friend since he was in college is a doctor what's his name Mitch Mitch Mitch and Merritt yeah I meant I mentioned to Mitch Mitch is like you took how much how much zofran no no and he's like why the fuck would you do that why wouldn't you tell me that this is what you were doing and I could have told you that this would make you feel this way because I guess this is a very common side effect if you take too much zofran just it makes your heart just jitter oh no no no no yeah so I spent my entire wedding day just like like cracked the fuck out yes how how were your vows how did that go were you like literally trembling you see my wedding video shaking like a leaf but like it's normal to be shaken like a leaf while you read your wedding vows I think yeah of course did you read them out loud to everybody yeah oh were yours really good yeah yeah Andrew's was really really good too um he I always say Andrew's a showman he so he cracks out his journal from the day that we met no is he I I have gone through an emotional roller coaster with Andrew today well so he cracks out the journal from the day that we met I my instinctual reaction when I saw that journal on it on the altar was that's bullshit that's I'm like he's written that and and it's telling everyone during his vows that this is from the day that we met I look at him like there's not a fucking chance I and then I said this to him after he read them I mean they were beautiful like it was very sweet I look at him I'm like there's no fucking way that's real yes it is he he hangs on for a month okay until until I we're in a transport somewhat to a festival and his tour manager is in the room and somebody had brought up Andrew's wedding vows and how they were the most beautiful thing they'd ever seen never seen anything so sweet as him still having his journal from the day that we met and he had also proven to me that it was real because all the other pages had been filled out his his tour manager is listening and he starts giggling to himself and I'm like oh what's so funny Jacob and he's like you know I I must admit I did see Andrew filling in that and I literally was like I fucking knew it like he's he just knows how to tell a tale that one so that's why you love him yeah but it was like very genuine like I don't have any doubt that that maybe like but I love that he knew to bring out the journal oh yeah because everyone was melting right yeah yeah yeah they're all crying yeah yeah and you're probably like oh my god I'm obsessed with him besties I have to say like this has been such a fun conversation like you are I'm so happy for you and excited for you like I feel like I don't I'm like what is your you know what I'm gonna start bringing this in I asked Lisa Rinna this a few shows ago like what is on your manifestation list like now that you have like reached this level of success like what does the next I know you're newly mommyhood right now but like what is the next five years like what do you want from life for your career like what do you want from life for your career for anything actually it's a tough question because I feel like I'm so good where I am yeah and I I don't I can't say I'm particularly one of those people that's like motivated to have like world domination where I need an empire and I need like 9 000 businesses that's so refreshing to hear because I feel like everybody feels like they could be doing more they want to be doing more it's not enough there are certain things that I would love to do I would love to I would honestly love to get back into modeling in like a really fuck you way like to just like pop out back in the modeling industry as like the face of something really sick okay I would love is there a brand in mind right now it's just something luxury babe let's do it let's do it or like a victoria's secret moment I would love that maybe not this year because I'm I'm not really in the shape yet yeah maybe like next year yeah yeah because that was like my dream when I was a model and that was everybody's dream when they were modeling 2015 was to be a victoria's secret angel yeah so something like that I would love to do I would love to just keep doing what I'm doing and just like have a really sick life where I can afford to take the vacations that we want to take and I can make the content I want to make and I can be present for julia and future kids and just like that's yeah be mommy I love that yeah and I also feel like you could be like a really great judge on like a baking show of some kind like I feel like you could have like some sort of like hybrid show of like baking so like just like an hgtv something where you are like the host or the I just feel like there's something in that world for you yeah I mean obviously long long term I would love to try and transition into something like that I would love to try and transition into like a more traditional media just because nobody really understands the longevity of being in your like 40s and 50s and and plus on socials yeah whereas like if you were to have like a martha stewart obviously you've got job security 100 so that side I would love to tap into but it's not like I'm tomorrow like I need my own hgtv yeah yeah hgtv show it's just like but you'll have it yeah you'll go the distance for sure that it will happen when it's meant to oh it will you know it will and I'll definitely will keep doing what I'm doing in the meantime and because like nobody was really that interested in in my home and interiors stuff until I did my nursery well yeah because you painted the whole fucking thing it's so rare it's not like everyone was like you need to start doing painting stuff it's been very natural like a flow of very natural right I mean I could literally talk to you forever but thank you so much for coming on seriously it was so much fun like such a treat seriously thank you so much for having me on today's show is produced by Sirius XM and me Morgan Stewart our audio engineer is Brendan Burns our videographer is Kim Cohen and our video editor is Shannon Joy Rogers our executive producers are Cody Fisher and Adam Sachs Sirius XM podcasts you