#560 - Being Dragged By A Boat

Welcome back to the basement yard. Frank, what are you doing? You know, that was me. That was me dribbling all my time. Right. But I'm. Wow. That was poor dribbling on my part. Correct. I, you know, feeling good, dribble-wise, nice dribbling, dribbling, and shooting. Yeah. How are you? I'm good. And you're, you got a brand new shirt. So how are you doing? I'm good. I'm feeling good. Yeah. Is that your, is this the first wear? It's not the first wear. You wear it in the shirt. I will say this. You pick the hottest day of the year to, so far, to wear the thickest knit shirt. No, it's like breathable. I can kind of see a super, you could see me. I could see you a little bit. You could see me. I can see you too, though. But I, I also know, I know thread counts and I know it's crazy. What? I've never seen his nipples. Have you never seen my nipples? I've never seen your nipples. I don't think I've seen your nipples. It's summer. Well, I'll nipple it up with you. We got, I mean, you've seen my nipples. I've seen your nipples. I've seen him as part of it. I hate my nipples. I know. It's, I mean, you got to, it's more selfless. When you see my nipples, do you also hate them with me? Like, is it a form of support? No. So actually, this is a good question. I hate my nipples. Right. Do you hate my nipples with me as support for my mental approach and outlook on my nipples? Or do you like my nipples in order to pull me out of the hatred of my own nipples? I'm not going to enable this self-hate you have for your nipples. It's not self-hate. I love every other part of me. This rectangular, you know, 30s. Oh, you're including all of it? I thought it was just the nipples. This area, I hate. So like, what would we say? This is what like, 13 inches by 3 inches. So what is that? 13 times 3 is. You got it. 39? 39 square inches of my body are my least favorite. Okay. Okay. So do you also dislike it with me? No. So you're, all right, this is good to know because I've, you know, obviously I've made fun of you for a lot of things. So if you also don't like something about yourself, you want me to pull you out of it and reassure you that you shouldn't be upset about it instead of being like, yeah, also, yeah, fuck that shit. Fuck your fucking stupid ass notes. Yeah, chew a question. When your wife, if ever, has said something to you like, hey, I'm feeling insecure about this thing. I don't really like this part about my body. What's your react? Because what you're expecting for me is probably not what you should. I don't remind her that she is sculpted out of marble. She's got us among women and go men's and however you choose to identify. Right. Yeah. So this is, so that's what I'm doing. But this is different. That's what I'm doing for you. This is different though. How, how could, but because we're not, a partner. We're not partners. And can we get a fact check on that? Look that up. No, don't look at me. Look at the internet. They might tell us the opposite. Are we counting ariola? Or just the point. Nipple. Nipple horse for counting ariola. That's the whole. It's like the term vagina. It's everything that's going on in the wallet. Got it. So we've got the cards. You got the ID. The nipple and the ariola are boys. They go together. Yeah, but sometimes like Wabalababa, but she looked like being below. That's all that. That was grease wasn't it? I'm gonna. Yep. Yeah, you know, second. Yeah, but you know how like sometimes with your nipples not hard, it's like all ariola. Yeah, that's my that's why I'm that's why I'm. Yeah, that's why you're touching up. I'll give them a little. If you're not kidding, when my shit's not hard, it's like a milk dud and I get pissed off because I love milk duds and I hate my nipples. Milk duds are dark. Your shits aren't dark. Not that dark, but I'm just referencing in the kind of like molded, rounded, rounded molded, like rounded molded, you know. Oh, you're saying molded like. Yeah, like I think it malleable. No, no, I don't have moldy tits. I don't think I don't have moldy tits. I don't have moldy titties. I hope. No, you got hair. You got hair around the nipple. Do you? I think I have weird. Yo, my chest hair, first of all, God, as if this guy needed anything else. His rich. He's good looking. He's athletic. You got good chest hair, dude. I got no. I actually do think I have a decent chest hair. I'm not kidding. I can count my chest hairs like by number. Like that's how little they're on it. That's him, boy. He's holding me too, but my whole thing. Yeah. Oh, my leg hairs are my, I, Danny Lopriore, you always used to tell me always this is a crazy thing to say every day of my life that he would be astonished at how hairless I was. But, but like, do you have hairless legs? No, the legs are hairy and the thigh too, but like, you see my leg? Yeah, your leg is insane. Bro, I don't. I can't. No, you got hair on your leg. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but like as you got as she needs, dude, what are you doing? He needs, he needs lotion on those. You got a throes on. Where are you going? Oh, he's going to kick over the dude. Yeah, it is crazy. What is that? Yeah, yeah. I mean, I got nothing. Also, am I seeing, I could see your pores from here, I think. Bro, I know. I got nothing. That's crazy. Good for you, man. Honestly, though, are you excited about that? That's why you were able to tread water for so long because you're a hair, you're like felps. You're a hairless and you're a flat. Well, it was more because Joe bet me I could do. No, but you're built for the water. I am built for the water. Absolutely. A little amphibious. Can you dive well? Sure. That doesn't say it's not. Yes, also diving board. Yeah. Well, where else are you all? Well, because you know, you could dive off a cliff. I've done that. You could dive off. I think if you're able to dive off of a cliff, you could dive off and just dive. Yeah, I'm good at diving. You. I remember watching you dive and you would like frog like it. Sometimes, yeah, and you would frog like it, but you made it look good again with your chest hair. You fuck. No, but one time I dove in Nicole took a video and I was like, yeah, that's the best dive. I've ever seen. I mean, for me, not for it in my life, but oh, yeah, not a lot of time. I'm not really like a really good diver to be honest. Yeah, I'm not brave. Well, give me your best three jumps in the water. Like that. You can do that. You're best like, if someone's like, yeah, we're doing a jumping in the water contest. Oh, which things would I bring your three, you're on the podium jumps in the water. Okay. I would attempt to dive because when I can get it, right, I just got to be like mentally. So you're playing that you're taking the gamble. Yeah, I'm going to gamble that. Well, I don't have a lot of big arsenal here. I mean, you got a good amount. I don't think so. I would do that. Then I'd probably do. I think I could do like a decent front flip. That's a cool one because high risk high reward again, because you land straight on your back. That's going to hurt so bad. Yeah. Usually you land on kind of your butt. Yo, I wish I could do a Gainer. I think that's the fucking coolest thing in the world. Our friend Dennis used to do a Gainer and it was I'm not kidding. What I imagined like deep impact would have been like he would hit the water and it was like, yes, some people are good at this. Yo, Keith can hit a jackknife hard body. Wait, wait, wait, which one it now see because different jumps have different names across different. You like jump and like it's holding the spin. Yeah, you like hold your one name. I thought that was Gainer. Which one is Gainer? Gainers when you're running and you flip back. Oh, you're doing a shooting star press. Yes. Like you're fucking Evan Bourne. Yes. Jesus Billy Kidman. Yeah, dude, like those are sick. Oh, I didn't realize that's what you meant by Gainer. Dude, if I could do a Gainer, I wouldn't shut up about it. Well, if I could backflip, I would I mean, this is why we get into Benson Boone territory. I get it because if I was that motherfucker, I'd be I'd be doubling up. Yeah, but you know what, though, it's gotten to the point like he got so famous so fast that he needs to chill because if he keeps doing the backflip, it's just going to take one person to see him fall, they get the ik because he'll be singing in backflip and then he'll like, what the hell was that? Is that a ribbit? What was that? He'll make like a weird yelping noise. Oh, I see. He'll be like, yeah, like fuck this guy. No, bro, I think that no one ever made a noise. No one of the opposite sex ever made a noise and he was like ill like a like a girl made a noise like a grunt or something. Some fuck was that. Yeah, you never see. Nothing stands out at the moment. I'm trying. I think that like if I'm Benson Boone, it sounds like, oh my god, backflip ik. I'd be like, hey man, super successful athletic. I'm and I got a great voice. I'm chillin. Yeah, you know what Benson Boone has never done so that MSG. Has he actually? By the way, if he hasn't. Easily good. Yeah, probably. But all right. So you know, you know, no pencil dive in there. Oh, pencil. That was another one. Pencil. I could pencil that I'm good at it. Like dropping an actual pencil into water. You can. I'm very, very good. Do you point your toes down? You have to. Oh, okay. So that's where I make a mistake because also a good pencil dive doesn't go straight down. It it curves. Like you need to curve with it because it's you just cut through the water better. I like that. But I have jumped from a distance and I hit my feet on the water so hard that I got like a belly flop on the bottom of my feet. Yeah. And now I just got stinging feet. I struggle with if I should include belly flop in my top 10 water jumps. You're good at that. Dude, I am so because you know how I am. I commit to the bit. So like I have done belly flops and just let it go. Like let it go. Like I'm fucking just scott staff. You know what I mean? Like off the building. Yeah. You're gonna go Elsa or something. Did you ever jump into a pool and your trunks came off? A bunch of times. Really? Yeah. Oh the beaches has taken my trunks. Yeah. Beaches sucked your shit. That's a way of just like sucked my pants off. We used to you know when we were two but the lake we had my pants came up. Bro, my dick was dragging against the surface of that water. Oh, I'm not kidding. And his dad was driving the boat and I'm hanging off the back and my pants just like immediately shot to my ankles and my raw dick is going to beat up by the weight. Yo, I I have spent more time raw dicking that lake. Oh, it's during tubing that I've been ever inside of a woman. Yeah, yeah, I've spent more time. Bro, We would go like any time we would two because we were fucking nuts with it. You remember we would go we would go three tubes at once jump up up up up up up up up up. And it was the most fun when someone would miss and they're fucking pants would fly off. But we had a of the big banana boat. You remember the banana boat to I do. Yeah. And what we would do is we would kneel there would be six of us at a time. Three would kneel on the sides of one person on the back. And yo, water is powerful, dude. It's so hard. It fucking it will take your shit and send it to fucking China. Dude, honestly, I'm not kidding. There was one time I fell off the back of this tube. But I'm holding on my pants shot to my ankles. And it felt like my dick was being stretched all the way back to my feet, like a 10. Yo, because like you look at the wake of a boat when you're in when you're tubing. And when you get to that, like you're about to go outside the wake. There's like the goggles and bubbles like going like this. So like when you're on that edge of the wake and your dick is just getting beat, like it is, oh, and money. It's cutting your dick down the whole like to sat. Yo, like I imagine being directly so weak. It's been a lot of thick. Yeah, bro. We're going to get more of it to get me down. This is very real to us, bro. Like I, I'm not kidding. My balls have gotten mashed too, bro. I've often, I've spent a lot of time wondering what it would be like to get dragged by horse. And I know, because I've been dragged by boat and tube. Yeah, I have. Yeah, I've been dragged by your glove. Also, a lot of people when they're driving, especially children drive the boat like this, right? Like the boat goes this way and you're hitting like waves and people go like this. Yo, my dad was driving a ship like this. It's just, it's just fucking like you're all over the plane. Also, like, oh my god, bro. I'm so scared to do it. Yo, honestly, my dad was a bitch about driving. It was Espos Dad and his grandfather that like, yeah, I mean, you know what Espos Dad looks like. The dude has tatted both arms. He's got a thick and mustache. He's got a spider web. A spider web. A spider web. And this guy's taking children tubing. I'm getting launched in the air and he's got my balls are mashed. And he's going what felt like 500 miles per hour. Chopping on a cigar, looking like looking back every five minutes to realize someone has fallen. Yeah. And like, you wouldn't, you would get fucking, you're hanging on like this and that you're crying laughing because you see the person hanging on and like, just let go. Like you just let go, but holding onto their shorts and their dick, dude, imagine if you just skull fucked a fucking bowl of marbles, like it should is just getting beaten to fucking death. Yeah, it's really insane. And I'm just, I have like a bunch of cuts. One time I fell off and I headbutt someone so hard that it like hit whatever and then as they went to come pick me up, the boat drove by, and Espos Dad, like called me a bitch or something. And I was like, damn, you're diving your leg. Yeah. The fuck are you talking about? Yeah. I mean, it was crazy, but it was a lovely upbringing to be honest. Yeah. So I'm also going cannonball, cannonball is a classic that I'm pretty confident at this point. When you go cannonball, right? When you jump into water and you do a cannonball, are you like one of those people that like crosses their legs and like faces forward? Or do you lean back? No. I kind of honestly, like I go up and I like, you know, like I like kind of go on my back. Okay. And I feel like I'm, you can push it down. I can push it down. Yeah. Which I know I can't. So you're asshole. You know, if you put it like that, yeah, because I've done that, I'm all jokes aside. I don't know why. It's the side of the cross where you got your gun, I've done a cannonball so hard. And I don't know if it was the gravity that day, but it legitimately hurt the rim of my ass hole. Yo, I'm not kidding. When I was younger, I don't know why my asshole would just suck in water randomly and body. Do you remember that shit? It'd be like, just randomly like, okay, what do you mean now? Well, how would I remember your asshole, please? I mean, you did it. Oh, my butt was getting water. Yeah. Of course, yeah. That's what I'm saying. So you jump into water or stay in water long enough, you're fucking, it's going to get in your head. It's like actually kind of a good thing. I think my butt kind of probably talks with excitement. Like when I get really hyped, it's like, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo. Yeah. It's like taking in water. So that's the thing. If you jump high enough, high enough with a cannonball, water will shoot up up your butt. Which I mean, like, it's not filled with me. It's not filling you up. But you are kind of like, animizing your butt a little bit. Like if anything, you're cleaning your shit out a little bit. Yeah, it's probably a net positive. And one of the few things I learned from meeting Dr. Mike is there's so many sphinters that like, it's not going to be dangerous to you. No, no, no, no. You're not like pressure washing your shit, but you're getting in there and you're cleaning the walls. No tubing, you're pressure washing. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yo, like, I can't even begin to express how much time we've spent tubing. Your shit gets like, like, I imagine like if you took someone's dick and like put it on those old timey washboards that they used in like the Oregon Trail. Yeah, and it's just, honestly, it's just not funny to be honest. I'll tell you this though. We beat monetization into a bloody pulp. Yeah, it's over there. There's no point. At this point. There is no way that we're getting it, dude, but what a good time. But yeah, man, I remember jumping in and I got Keith always makes fun of me because I didn't even think about what I was saying. But I jumped into our pool and I came out of the water and I was like, yo, that hurt my ass. Well, so bad. Yeah, dude. Once I jumped off a boat and landed in water, I landed like I was like sitting on the ground or something. Oh, bro, clapped my whole ass, clapped my balls, my hand on my ass. Yo, your shit was clapped. A hundred percent. My whole shit was like beat to hell. Was anyone around when your shit was getting clapped? Yeah, dude. I was in Connecticut. Oh, wow. It was jumping off the Espo's boat. People watching you get your shit. Like, we used to do, dude. We used to do something called the drop off where, oh, I've done this. You remember that shit? Yeah. So we all, you'd never been to the lake house. We all had, everyone had docks and what Espo's dad would do when he would take a stupid cause bro, big boat, big wake went fast. Yeah. And what he would do is it would be sometimes a little difficult to him to pull into the dock by himself to grab the whips and everything to like, you know, kind of tie up on the cleats. He would just, so he would come, if this was the dock, he would drive and just turn right here and it would whip the tubes. So we knew it was coming. So we would let go and you would skate off the fucking, bro, skip off the water like a rock. Yeah. And like, there were times that like, if you got a bad angle, you rolled over with it and like, your butt was getting blasted. Yeah. When I used to fall off tubes and it's like pretending that you got to hit really hard by like a character and you're like bouncing off the wall like, big, big, big, big, big, big. Yeah. Do you want to hear something that is so me coated? Oh, God. I'm gonna be so happy about this. Don't chase. That almost went through the teeth. When we were like 12 years old, bro, we would go tubing three times a day, which now, if I went tubing now one time a day, I'm done for three days. Yeah. We would go tubing three times a day and at the end of every tubing session, I'd be like, good ride, boys. Yeah. You suck. Oh, God. Good ride, boys. See, before Van Diesel, there was him, you know what I'm saying is like, you know, we're family. There was never me. I've never existed in the world before Van Diesel. You kidding me? Although I've never seen a fast movie. You've never seen any of the Fast and Furious movies? Never. What? How did you even get? I've never seen a minute of a single one of them. Oh, I'm just like, there's like a clip of something. Even Tokyo Drift? None. Zero. Wow. That seems like the one I'd watch because I bow. Wow. But I didn't watch that one. Yeah. I didn't see that even though. Pretty sure it's bow-wow. What's this one? No. No. No. No, I didn't. I didn't see that one. Was that Drift? I'll have to say, I don't know. Yeah. No, but I refused. I refused because we had known someone that got hit by a drag racer. So it was like my standing up for what was right to not watch any of those movies. Oh, damn. I saw like five of them dancing. So you're a piece of shit to his family and his memory. Okay. Those movies made billions of dollars. Yeah. Obviously, I mean, I think like they have jumped the shark at this point in time to my understanding where it's like ludicrous is driving a car in space. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, let's tell how do we get this Pontiac GT? Is that a good car? That's a piece of shit. That's an old. I don't think Pontiac even exists anymore. I don't know. It's like, we got a Dodge Charger, you know, got a landed, it's a space car. We're going to drive this Dodge Charger into a rocket and it's good to attach it with the rubble. That's my Vindiesel. That was Silvestre Stallone, I think. That is also him too. I feel like, yeah, that was. That also sounded like you, but Mid-Burp. Well, the Vesis Stallone, you're so re-moody. That's my Silvestre Stallone. Oh. Yeah. Do an impression of anyone. Don't sit there and speak. I can't. I can't. I don't. Oh, no. You get him. No, you get him now. You could do a Godfrey. Pretty good. Who? Go with Godfrey. Yeah, you could do Godfrey pretty good. What do I say? You don't remember? Yeah, I do. But I can't. Something wrong with. It's something. Yeah, yeah. What is it? Oh, I need a line. Line? He's got no lines. Oh, I thought he. You were good. You were good. You're the poor fucking computer guy. What does that just make something. Look up! Go with Godfrey lines. No, it's fine. Don't worry. Although he had some. Never mind. I'm not going to do that. You know what we do have. We have some sponsors for today. Sponsors for today. Sponsors for today. Sponsors. Okay, the first one the first one that we have here is-- - Read the whole ad as Gilbert Godfrey. - Don't do that. - No, don't do that, please. - Squarespace, though. Make it a website. (laughs) A space-set-square. Squarespace. - It is a website where you can build your website. So if you make content or you have some sort of, you know, e-commerce business or something like that, you can get started on Squarespace. They're gonna help you build your website and also help you run a very functional website. They have all the data and all these tools that are gonna help you optimize the traffic and everything else you need to run a successful website. 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Yeah, that was loud. So loud. How long could I talk straight? Because we were talking before about cameo. And cameo, it's a lot of times, it can only be like 30-- it has to be like 30 seconds, or it could be longer than that and stuff like that. How long do you think you can go, like, if you really wanted to talk nonstop? Guy, bring it up. We both have cameo. It was crazy. I didn't say anything about your cameo. Wait a plug at you, plugger. That feels like a slur. That was a slur. That was hard, R after two. That was crazy. Quick call, quick call. Josh, leave that in. Leave it in, destroy him. Get someone else in here. Wait a-- get someone else in here. Yeah, no, that was crazy. A hard R right there is wild. What are we talking about? Oh, how long can I talk? You know it's funny. If that was me, I would be like, guy, seriously. Shouldn't we take that out? And you won't be like, no, you're fine. How long can you talk filibuster style until you have fully filled your bust? Those are two separate questions. I think if I'm going for it, and it's like I have-- I'm trying to go for as long as I possibly can. And what constitutes as a break? Like, can I stop and think what I'm going to say? If you stop for more than 10 seconds-- Oh, if you stop for more than-- Let's go five seconds. That's a break. What are the rules? Can you do me a favor? Look up, because there are actual rules to how long a fill of bust is there? Yeah, filibusters are real thing. Yeah. They just read Dr. Seuss sometimes. What? They just read Dr. Seuss or books up there just by time. Did you ever see what's called the parts of the wreck? Hold on. I'm going to need an explanation. So in the United States, I don't know if it's Congress or the Senate or what have you. If they want to basically prolong a vote, they will do something called a filibuster where they will not relinquish their time. And they'll talk unbroken until people finally give it and they're basically like, fuck and whatever. Let's just table the whole conversation to another time because they don't want it to be like the vote's going to go against them. I think didn't Cory Booker just do a legendary one? I'll look that up, but just further explanation is because the Senate allows for an unlimited debate. There's no cap. So people will just go up there to extend the voting, like he said, by just reading books or just talking forever. What a stupid and childish thing. Yes. Yes. Now we're talking American politics. That's a whole other thing, but-- Yeah, no, no. Is it ridiculous? So it's like, well, then I'll just annoy you. That's literally like, OK, well, being a little bit-- I guess we'll just talk forever. Catty little bitch. Wow, that's the dumbest thing ever. Not very long. What's long? Like, I could probably do like 40 minutes. I mean, that is long. I've done it before, like a solid podcast. I mean, we are in a world where we do podcasting. So especially if I can, like, prepare stuff. That I can go way longer than 40 minutes. I don't think preparing-- I think the whole point of it is that it's not prepped. I think the idea is that they're just going and going and going and going. It needs-- I imagine there needs to be here some form of coherence. Like, you can't just be up there and just be like, hibi-bibi-bibi-bibi-bibi-bili-jubili-jubili-jubili. Right. I think that if I could think about it for a little bit before, then I could probably do it. Because I used to do podcasts by myself. And that was where, like, 35, 40 minutes. Or, like, you just go down tangents and paths and you lose it, which is ironic, because that's kind of what we do now. Right. But at the time, I was just like, huff. That wasn't good. Booker's speech, the longest filibuster, was 25 hours and five minutes. He talks for that long? Yeah. 200 plus pages of prepared material-- nope, I lied. 1164 pages of prepared material, but 200 stories about stuff. It was just, like, long. Fun fact. Could you talk-- Shut up for 25 hours. No way. I don't care about anything that much. I mean, that's not true. You care about your family. You care about your job. To a degree. [LAUGHTER] I think 25 hours is crazy. Yeah, I don't-- I don't even know how that's possible. I mean, you just talk-- at points, it just goes off on tangents, like, you'll start talking about politics, and you'll be in there about, like, smokey the bear or something. But physically, I don't even know how that's possible. Because sometimes we come in here, and we have to record two episodes. and then we record videos. And by the time I get home, my voice is like, "Horse." - "Horse?" - "Horse?" - "Horse." - "Horse." - "Horse." - "Horse." - "Yeah, you got a horse in your throat." - "What's "Corse?" - "Corse" is like when something's like-- - "Fine." - "No, that's more when it's more like the real-- - "Oh, horse is the opposite of fine." - "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah." - "Horse." - "Sand." - "Right." - "Corse." - "Yeah." - "Cause everywhere." - "Yeah." - "He doesn't know." "If you could tell me where that's from, I will give you, say it how the character says it." - "Exactly." - "Give him the location." - "No, not the location." - "I hate sand." It's dry. I'm butchering in here at some degree. I hate sand, it's dry, it's coarse, and it gets everywhere. - "That sounds so familiar." - "It is quite. " I know it's from something you have seen in it. - "You've definitely animated?" - "Nope." - "We're gonna end up face." - "Okay, I hate sand, it's coarse, it's sandy, and it gets everywhere." - "It's something, it's coarse, and it gets everywhere." - "It's popular as being a bad line in this movie." - "And an arguably bad movie, but people have since come around, and so like, no, it's actually really good." - "Is it the fucking movie where the guy's like, "I cannot, the room?" - "No, that has some bad line delivery, though." - "Okay, what is it?" - "You're my favorite customer." "Hello, Poppy." Star Wars episode two, "Attack of the Clones." - "I would have never gotten that." - "I know that's why I was astonished, and I would have offered you a lot of things." What's the longest you think? 'Cause you just did the modern wisdom wisdom. - You guys talked for a while. - We did talk. We talked for two hours and 45 minutes, and I talked a lot there. And then after that, I was so tired. - I mean, Greg went to like a nice dinner, and the waitress was like trying to be nice. And she was like, "Oh, so you guys like into, like are you guys from around?" And I was like, "Oh, you know, we're from New York." And I was like, "Oh, you in town, like doing, like going to any comedy shows?" 'Cause I guess like the comedy scene there is like why everyone's there. And I was like, just, I didn't say this, but in my head, I'm like, just the bread. Just the bread, 'cause I was so tired. - What about you? What's the longest you think you've like done podcasting? - I think I could go. I could go for a while. - You could play as Mario Kart for a week at all. - The fuck? - The sub-a-thons. - Yeah, but a lot of it's this. - Yeah, but-- - I wanna beat you bitch. - Yeah, at night when like everything's winding down, we have like slumber parties and like-- - Hey, you guys sleep on screen. - No, they're like, usually-- - No, who's the plugger? (laughing) - I didn't say the name. - Apple, hard art. - Hit 'em, hit 'em with something. - No, bring it up. - No one out, we need 'em. - Hang up. We need me. - Thank you. - So like, I could go for hours. What the hell? - Wow. I didn't plug anything. I think, 'cause I've done a 24 hour stream and I talked. - Oh my God. - The whole, I've done two 24 hour streams and I talked brother. I'm sure there were parts where I was just like, but for the most part, I remained animated. - Bro, a 24 hour stream with you now would be bonkers. - It's actually easier because you usually have people bringing stuff up and talking to you. - Well yeah, you talk to the chat. And honestly, at times, the times where I thought it was gonna be the hardest is when the most activity was happening, like 4 a.m. like there was like a thousand people in there. - Yeah, really? - I think I peaked at like 1,100 people. - Well I guess at that time, it's like, if you're up, there's only a few things you can do. - I also had a lot of tea. Like, I remember like, I just rip in pieces. - I mean, I, there was a, like those mornings, I was like, I took like bathroom breaks and stuff like that because you have to, there's physically no way. - Yeah, yeah, you got a crap in peep. - You got a peep, peep, peep. - Yeah. - But yeah, man, oh my God, I guess I haven't realized that. - What does that feel like when you're at hour 24 and you're like, ending, are you like? - Well, I did it straight 24 hours. The way that you guys do it is crazy where it's just like, every donation will do an extra 10 minutes and then people are sending donations so it lasts a week long. - 13 days was the last one. That is sickening. And you, didn't you say that like, it had to end because you guys had a wedding? - Yeah, but they decided to gather together and go, we're gonna make them miss the wedding. So we had to, we had to stop it. I love that. - Yeah. - I love that. It was, I remember very clearly, I did it to like, pay back the money that was fronted for me to get the equipment. And I said like, if we get to that financial goal, then I'll do a 24 hour stream. The first, I really believe I broke it up into my feeling was like eight hours. Those first eight hours, I was just like, gung ho, so about it. I was fun. I was happy. I was playing video games. Those middle eight hours, it was like, oh shit. And then those last eight hours, it was like, it kind of worked back toward it. And then, because you're like, getting used to the, yeah, it's almost over. And then I, I remember, I don't know if it was the first one or the second one, but the Yankees were playing in game one of the ALCS against the Astros. So like, I like went out. After we finished, I like had champagne and I started drinking. - After being awake for 24 hours? - Yeah, I started drinking and Becca found me like, passed out, but like, not the passed out. Like, I remember falling asleep. Like, I was like, watching and then I remember her waking me up. - Right. 'Cause you're probably so tired. I'll have to find it. I had taken a picture of my eyes. - Why? - 'Cause we were all fucked up. Oh. - Dude, there's nothing worse than that. I mean, even in LA, like I had, we were just in LA. I had trouble sleeping there because of like the time difference, I guess. And like, I always get up at the same time. So out there, I'm three hours early. So I'm like wired at like five a.m. or four a.m. And then I just like, the effect that not sleeping has on you is like insane. 'Cause I usually get, you know, seven and a half hours at least. - I know it's probably not a great thing, but I operate really well off like five and a half to six hours. - I used to rip four hours when I was younger all the time. - And be chilling. - Beginning of the year, when I was like, pretty aggressively like going to the gym and stuff, I was going to sleep at 11, 10, 30, 11 and I was waking up at four. - Yeah. - You know, which is like, I think is not good. I mean, you probably like, I do appreciate how like that puts you down earlier. - Yes. - But when I was younger, that would do it. And it's like, we would be up all night playing Xbox. I would be up to like three a.m. Go to school. Same shit. - Dude, we used to stay up to like four or five. And I remember in college, very specifically having an 8 a.m. class and being like, - Sons out. This is crazy. - Bro, it was so good or sometimes I'd be like, like I think maybe that's why I'm such a good sleeper 'cause when I was younger, I would be in the, me and Keith shared a room and like, I would go to sleep and Keith would be up, telling people to suck his dick on Halo. So I like something. - What was that? - Boy was he. - Yeah, he was going crazy. My mom sometimes would come in there. That was my favorite. When it woke my mom up, which I don't know how it didn't every fucking night because he was bad about something. - Yo, my mom used to come in there and lose it. - It was hysterical because you would just hear Keith. - Ah, motherfucker. - Yeah. - He said shit and then you would hear your mom. 'Cause it was before like, it was before the technology where it was like, you really only heard the person speaking into the mic. - You can hear the whole room. - You can hear the whole house. And I remember hearing your mom coming down the stairs. Like, are you fucking kidding me? Bro, he used to do this in our room as next to my mom's room. - Yeah. - And then sometimes she would come in and she would be, 'cause there's other people sleeping. - Fucking quick. Are you crazy? - And I'm laying a bit like, he is crazy. - Yeah, he is. - Yo, he got after him with some of that shit. But like all of us were at some point. And then also like we would be in a party chat to like fuck with the other person. We would just kick them. - Yeah. - So like they're in the middle of like a death match or slayer and then like they have to like stop what they're doing to rejoin and then they die instead of like that. - Bro, do you know what? Like it blew my mind that that was like a universal thing that happened on Xbox. Like I would see memes of it and people would be like, what's the shape of Italy? Like I didn't know other people did that to their friends. - Let me ask you a question. Does that make it more special for you or less special? - I think more. It's like you participated in something that like was just like, every other story. - I was gonna say like, didn't it feel more special when you would talk with your friends about it and be like, yo me and my friends do this shit and it's crazy, it's hysterical. And you felt like it was yours? - Mate, I don't, I mean maybe, I don't know. I kind of go back and forth with that type of thing because I do have, well I think I've said this on an episode before where like with COVID as horrible it was, it was horrible. I thought that there was something interesting about like everyone's going through this at the same time on the whole planet. - So like it is kind of cool when you find out that like, oh the thing that we, like you know like little things, like I used to say Ali Ali oxen free. Then you think that's the only thing that you and your friends know but it becomes a thing that in other countries that you even know and it's like, oh wow, what? - Yeah, I guess I know we were just talking about getting your dick and balls dragged by water but definitely something that's a shared experience. But like at what point does an experience lose its luster by how shared it is? Like for me, I'm thinking in terms of like what you're saying, like the whole Xbox, because it has now become a thing. Like the world is like genuinely obsessed with nostalgia. I mean, Jesus, if you go on TikTok, there's so much of just like, you know, like Xbox parties and old snacks and games like that. And you know that. That that cuts me at my core. Do you see the videos where they're they're like AI videos of like here's Christmas in 1994, yeah, yeah, and I'm like a part that must fuck you up I've seen them, but you know how I am with a I I swipe the fuck away from them I'm like, oh, I'm not supporting this bullshit I watch it and I'm like Like there was one with a woman like pushing a cart and blockbuster and I'm like and it's just like unlocks like thoughts They haven't had in so long and like oh my god. It's weird because I remember as a kid having the difficulty explaining what are now considered shared experiences and in a way it like it both like Calcifies how special it was to me, but also like I don't want to hear about anyone else experiencing it Like I wanted to remain my thing, but it is also cool that it was something that other people engaged and it's a weird There's a really fine line to ride there, bro. There was nothing better than that like being like 16 and Just it was like you were with your friends all day and like especially in the summer and then you would get home And it's like I am literally on Xbox until 4 a.m. Every night and like there was a sense of like it was the like Even the internet back then was not the internet that it was now I feel like the internet now is more of a representation of like Xbox game chats Then they were what the internet was then like yeah, no one is going on the internet to play flash games anymore like there They want that many clip Fucking new grounds you remember new grounds. What was the one that had candy stand bro Candy stand had a a golf game like a mini golf game Like you pulled it back to like for like the the power and shit like that like it was like candy on each level Bro, I fucking loved that game. I used to play it in school all the time I fucking games.com that one that one was a good one. There was a bunch on there But I also was like going to like cartoon network and I was like playing the like Dexter's laboratory Mases and shit like that didn't even know that was a thing. Oh, I do know what you're talking about dude There was some fucking Nickelodeon and Disney and cartoon network had the best flash games in the world Flash games, dude, but like no one goes online. I guess they do it on their phone But like phone games are such bullshit. It's so different. It's so bullshit. It doesn't it doesn't hit like a fucking Fat ass computer just fucking click clackin and like you know like the game where it's like you had to like judge How far to shoot an arrow at another stick figure? I love that like now. It's like all marvel contested champions Which is cool and I love and I play often But like it ain't It's over produced like when you get a lot of hands when there's money in it more hands get on top of it It's like fuck you. Yeah, I just want to pull back this thing and shoot an arrow into a stick figures head and watch them bleed out Wow, and he would bleed out and then like or I want to do the one where I put just fucking sandwiches on this Impossible Rufus the rat fucking you know taco put ingredients on this taco and Rufus could go send it out Yeah, stuff like that. I don't mean to rain on any parade here You guys sound a little boomery We're if anything by definition. It's not boomery the point is like the mentality of like oh is better back when I mean I don't know if I don't want to sit there and say better. You don't like because you don't like anything So true. You're afraid to like stuff. I like I like you don't like any goes as far as can you watch it? That's it. I like it watch it. I'm gonna like it Okay, that's not no the way true. You don't like anything What is that you like anything that you can't dead? I don't know. I acknowledge I acknowledge like how that can come off sounding boomery I'm not gonna be one of those people with like everything was better back then because there was a lot of blind spots that Our society had and things that were exploited and like the way that people were treated Marriage wasn't legal in our lifetime. That's fucking hilarious. Dude. Yes hilarious. It's the wrong word I mean, it's insane. It's a thing. We know what you're saying in our lives In our lifetime like that was a thing But like I'm not sitting there I say because there are a lot of things that we could be critical about and are legitimately better now but like in the ways At which people like enjoyed themselves like the simplicity had a lot more enjoyment in it where now Everything is monetized and like yes We are one of the we are kind of part of that problem. I guess in a sense, but like There was a lot more of a feeling of like it just was Less evil about there was more community, I would say they're absolutely right. I feel like there's more community now really There's I but but the irony is that in the accessibility to that community. There is less But what's scale are we talking because Frankie skating around a grand scale and I'm talking about like like there's there's There's also more opportunities to fork many communities everywhere now on the internet I agree not in that way. I'm at like You know, there's a lot of people especially the other generation that like don't Socialize in the way that we were forced to when we were younger. That's fair, but there's also More people that do too. You know, there's two sides. I think that there is definitely more accessibility to those forms of Socialization, but with that accessibility and the need to place an identity in those groups They're just naturally becomes more Separation like like like for instance Star Wars has always been a thing, but now Star Wars and its fandom is more divided than it has ever been and that's because It just sounds so traumatic, but I mean, bro There they're people have been bullied out of the dude that played young Anakin Skywalker Jake Lloyd like his life was Fucking ruined because of the division of Star Wars fans like the little kid what they don't fuck with him Bro, he like went and had like severe mental health issues as a result of the online bullying that he was like eight years old That is so fucking crazy. So the Hallie Marie Tran was like in the most recent Star Wars trilogy She was basically bullied into like can I just say also people who get on the internet and say random things to celebrities Because they're like they'll never read it bro. They're gonna see it Especially if a lot of you are saying that and it's a psychotic thing to do in my opinion Yeah, and also people be like this is the job you signed up for oh, what? No, it isn't you you you sign up for eyes on you You don't sign up for the pieces of shit that just feel like now because you're in that position They could say whatever they want. I don't know. It's like you you're especially people that are like in it for like I you know people who want to be actors or something It's like I enjoy this art form and I was always into theater and stuff and then it starts working out and it's supposed to be a great thing, but then You know the the necessary evil that we're choosing to accept exists is like well you signed up for the fact that everyone's gonna You know paparazzi's gonna take pictures of you when you look the worst and you know You don't get to be insecure and cry about that and it doesn't matter or whatever like you sign up for it's like Well, I just really enjoyed acting and now you're taking picture of me pictures of me and I'm completely insecure about myself Yeah, so thanks or they zoom in a thousand time lens on a on your wiener while you're on a boat Yo that honestly they did a deeper What yeah years ago they were like on a boat and they like zoomed in crazy and like got a picture of him with his Like dick out and then he talked about on Ellen, which is bananas by the way. Oh, I mean there's a lot of those Ellen clips that Writing was on the wall. She was not very nice. You know, there's a lot of shit like that, but you could tell by the eyes But yo, I'm not kidding something like that happening to me would I mean it's just your penis. Yeah But I would end up in jail. Ah, I see I wouldn't do anything, but I would definitely make phone calls To what what is that? I want the person who took that picture to get their fucking ass who've got it like what is wrong with you? Like psych psychotic. Yeah, and also the people who buy it They're like yes, you're nuts. Yeah crazy. These are peeps. Yeah, these are peeps and human peeps also uns you know Unwanted taking pictures of a peeps is crazy. Yeah, and like I didn't know you know the story of like these like older the full story of looking at his life through like a Benefit of hindsight lens is gonna be insane because there is so much like that is the ex that is the first and most intense example of like That parasocial relationship that the world has had with a celebrity. That's not even our lifetime. It's not even that bad probably Um, like the the that one spot his documentary is gonna be great bro. He's a legend of fuck with the beeps hard We also fuck with Rocket money hard. 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I like using the Budgeting Act. I don't the Budgeting Act. The Budgeting Tool. I don't really like to spend money without knowing how it's going out. So using the Budgeting Tool is like a big one. And definitely just make sure that you're not you know, using subscriptions that you're signed up for that you don't really want anyway. So definitely good for that too. So rockimoney.com/basement. We also have Kachava. Kachava is lovely. Okay. It has it's an all in one nutrition. It's like all in one nutrition. All right. It's a powder. Take a scoop. You put it in some water. You shake it up. And it's got a bunch of different stuff for energy digestion, strength, metabolism, cognition, and immunity. They provide clean nutrition to fuel wherever they take you. There's no artificial flavors, colors, or sweeteners. It's non-GMO, no soy, no animal products, no gluten. But yeah, you could try it risk-free with their love at Guarantee. And you will love it. Especially the Chaka one. Low key. 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It might have been the crumbful. Is that the asshole? No. This is yeast in a bun. In a pussy. Why am I saying that? Be kind of a thing. Yeah. I'm saying it like why am I going to porn right now? This is this is dad. They took it and they made you know what's funny is like the article I read was like they made good bread. And it was like they specified good. Not like. Not like. Whoa dude. How is it? Dude. Is that a violation of the mummy? Yeah. It's my yeast. That's your shit. Yeah. Like don't fucking take your. Do we have yeast? I hope. Or is that just? I don't think a boy's got yeast. I think it's just what we have then. Buns. Yeah. And piss. No. I don't think. Yep. Men have yeast. Where's our yeast? Where's our shit at? You can get yeast infections. No, I know men can get yeast infections. I know. I know. We know someone that has gotten the yeast infection. What? The head of the penis. The head of the piece is going to be a piece. What? The head of the piece has the yeast. It can. Yeah. No. Men can get yeast infection. Balantis. What's that? Who's that? What it's called? Balantis. Balantis? That sounds like a crazy city. Like awesome. Like it's been gone for years, but welcome back to Balantis. Yeah. So wait, I have a city of yeast on the tip of my weiner. I don't know if you have right now. I haven't seen, but you can. Oh, is that it's bad if I have it? Yes. Yes. Yes. The yeast infection is not good. No, but do you just have it? I don't think guys have it. I think I think women, you're like, you know, you can't, it can form like it can form and that's not a good. But I think like, like there is a natural. Because girls don't just have it with don't they have a yeast? No, it's bacteria that they get after you. I thought women have yeast just like I think they got, I think they got that shit locked loaded ready in the chamber. Just case. Yeah. I think they have like good yeast. Because like, remember there was years ago, there was like some streamer that made like beer with her yeast. Oh, I'm around. She does everything. Yeah. You're right. Wait, why do you know exactly it didn't taste that great? Candida. Hold up. You had yeast, dude? No, I'm kidding. Wait, I'll No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no - You didn't like clam? - No, it was good phonetically, but like physically it hurt. - Okay. - What movie was it where they referred to of a giant as a clam and I was just like, "Oh, I don't like when dudes say shit like that." - Yeah, I'll be like, "Oh, the clam box." - There's like three words I'll accept. Outside of that, I'm not, I'm to it. - Oh, yeah. - We have Canada too. - We do. - Where is our naturally occurring? - It's just on the skin and in their body. - Got you. - Canada on me? - You could take scrapes of your skin and you could make sourdough bread. - It seems more penile. - Peepie? - Yeah. - So dip your dick in like bread. - Doe. - Right. - And you might fucking go nuts on some bread. - You know that people would buy your dick bread. - I'll try it. - You try your own dick bread? - Is that-- - Was that gay or something? - I mean, it's right there. (laughing) You're eating your dick. - You're not gonna on the door, brother. - I mean, I had a dream about my eating my penis. - Remember that? - That's right, you were chewing on it like a chicken wing. - Yo, I-- - Crazy that you went chicken wing and you didn't go like foot long hero or something. - But not only was I chewing on my penis and my dream like a chicken wing, but it was the most tender meat. - Yeah, you have always just like-- - It was just like squalling off of-- - I gotta be honest, you speak about, you spoke about this and have bringing it up again to the point where like you seem like you kind of wish you could try it. Like you want a slow roasted smoked dick. - No, I do not. I do not want a slow roasted smoked dick. - I can imagine. - I mean, you're now getting crazy with all the adjectives with the cooking adjectives. So I know you're sitting there and you're talking about the how tender and juicy. I said, first of all, I said my own was tender in my dream. You're over there like, oh, I would throw it on the black stone. - I never said that, I never said I was doing that. I never in any point in time said that. - You tell me a guy for you made a penis for you and made it? - No. - No? - I don't know. - No. - Diner's drive-ins and a dick. (laughing) - Aw, slap some of this gangster sauce on this cock and it's fucking delicious sauce bombs. (laughing) - Oh man, this cock is donkey. - Oh my God, this fucking dick is gangster brother. You gotta eat something. Today we're in Minneapolis, Minnesota and we stopped at Rudy's to get some dick. (laughing) We're Louisiana, home of the smoked cock. And today, we're in Jacksonville, Florida and we're trying to get our hands on some big balls and dicks. (laughing) - What are we? - Oh my God. - All right, I'm here with Chef Roman. Chef, tell me how you absolutely just pulverize this beef into mouth watering tendery goodness. (laughing) A breaded dick. - He's got two rings on each finger, let me taste that. (laughing) - That's gangster. - It's savory, it's sweet and it's dick for sure. - Welcome to Guy Fieri's dumpster restaurant. Today, we're putting cocks in a garbage can over nachos. (laughing) - Yo, let me tell you something. - Oh my God. - There's another level of demonetization. - We have just discovered it. - I don't, we might owe them money. - Oh my God. - Who's the CEO of YouTube? He's just gonna hit us up, he's like, "Guys, come on." - What was his name, we looked him up. - Yeah, Paul. - Nail, right? - Nail, Nail, Nail, Nail, we're pretty good fun. - Come on, Nail. - This is all good fun, dude. - Yeah. - Oh man. - Fucking God. - Welcome to Triple G, you can only shop in the aisles that have cocks. (laughing) - We got no chance. - We even listed the best chefs. (laughing) James Beard award-winning chefs to cook peanuts. - These chefs are gonna work for 24 hours. Every hour one is gonna get eliminated, but every hour we're as judges are gonna eat it. - And every dollar that we win is gonna be a proceed to feeding people in America. (laughing) - Chef, you have three Michelin stars. What does it feel like to be in the Triple G house cooking this penis? (laughing) - How did this happen? (laughing) - Oh my fucking god. - Gordon Ramsay goes to restaurants. I guess he's fucking tough. Awful. - This cock tastes like dick! (laughing) - Yo, we just did 10 minutes on dick. (laughing) - God, I don't even know what to do. - I don't even know what to do. - Yeah, what an episode. - I don't know. - Oh, I hate to see the thumbnail that's made for this one. - I mean, you know, we've, I think I'm just, yeah. (laughing) - All right, all right. - I can't wait to see what, what does this note say right now? - Yeah, those notes are gonna be crazy. - Oh, God. - So, what were we even talking about? - The mummified, the mummified shit. - I would do that. They said they were gonna make, they said they made bread, but they also would make beer. I would drink a mummy's dick beer. - I mean, you drank a beer that was made with bear shit. - That's true, and it tastes like beer. - And it tastes just like beer. - Yeah. - So like, there's nothing stopping you. - Yeah, like a mummy's, so be honest. - All right, here we are. I know that like beer gets very hot when they're making it, when they're making it. - Oh, I don't even shit. - If they sold like how they did with like Sidney Swiney's bathwater. - Yeah. - But it was just like, oh, we just had a guy swim naked in here for an hour, and then we bottled it, and it's, we're calling it a ball beer. - Who's the guy? - That's a, that makes a difference? - You're saying some guy, so I don't know. - Jalen Brunson. - What are you talking about? - I'm emptying the fucking cake. - Yeah. - If it's Jalen Brunson, if it's anyone on the next right now. - Okay. Brian Cranston. - Yeah. - Will Smith. - Yeah. - Lesson to the Essex. - I need to find some of that, I'll be like, wait a sec. - Hitler. - What are we, we can't. - I didn't think that. I think it could get worse. - And now. - I was just trying to think of the worst person I could think of. Which apparently, according to some places in America, that's not the worst. - Yeah. - Oh God. - You would, so. - I'm pretty sure we said COVID at some point, too, in here. - Well, now, if we didn't, you just hammered it out. - Yeah, let's throw out a vaccine while we're at it. - All the words, Neil, how about that? - Stick it up to the moon. - That's why that's for you, Neil. - Oh, man. - Jokes aside. Jokes aside. - I would drink the beer. If I swam in a vat of beer and sold it, just for that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I would try it. - I would try it. - You would. - Interesting. - Because if it was bad, then I would be like, bro. - You'd be your sucks. - Yeah. - You're a ball beer, sucks. - The bread, I guess, is tougher. I feel like you'd be able to taste more of the balls and the balls. - Yeah, because I think at a certain point, any of the human taste would just go away in the fermentation process of the alcohol. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Which, you know. - And once you butter the bread, some buttery balls, I guess. - But like, how are they able to extract yeast out of someone who's been dead for that long? - Well, bro, the yeast exists. - Bro, we know this now, because Becca's been crushing sourdough. Those starters, like, you can drive them out and put them, like, literally you dry out a sourdough starter and like, it will stay good forever. This was also a frozen mummy. - Does that matter? - Yeah, 'cause I think it preserves bacteria. - Yeah, but even in the freezer, things have a shelf life. Like, it's not like they're good forever frozen. - I never really thought about that. - Sublimination, sublimination, sublimation. I forgot the exact term, but like, it's the process of going from solid to gaseous. So like, if you ever, like, had a freezer and you left like an ice cube in the freezer and eventually, like, it doesn't melt but the ice cube shrinks. - I guess. - It's the process of going from a frozen, like, a solid to a gaseous state. - And what makes, what's the catalyst there? Is it just time? - I don't know, that's a great question. Look up the science behind sublimination or sublimination. - I'm already on it. - Yeah. - I don't know. - Gotcha. - Okay. - We're trying to save this goddamn episode. - Save it from what? This is one of the best episodes we've done. - I mean, like, we're trying to balance all this ice. - A good example is like dry ice, you know? - Yeah, but that's not. Dry ice is a different chemical, brother. - That's not what it is. - It's not what it's frozen carbon. - Let me ask you guys how it is telling me here. - Do you guys like dry ice? Like, if you get, like, if you're at a cocktail bar and they bring some shit out, that's smoking. You fuck with that? - Helly, brother. - Yes. - I think that all drinks should be served smoked. - Not smoked. - Smoked smoking. - Like, with like, fog about. - I went to this bar, this, like, cocktail bar. And I actually went to a restaurant and then the owner was like, oh, hey, and then it was like, we opened a cocktail bar downstairs 'cause you wanna try it out, I was like, sure. So I went and all the drinks, like, you order a drink and they put it in like a tray, like the two cups and then they fill the tray with like, the smoke and shit. So they put it in front. It's like, they're smoke everywhere. - Where was that one place that was huge for a while where they had like, candy drinks or sugar drinks. It was a called sugar bar. - We're like, you know what I'm talking about, right? - Sugar freak? - Sugar freak, sugar fuck, sugar balls, sugar, sugar. - I don't know, sugar, sugar gag. - Yeah, it's not that. - Put like, and it came with like a bubble and like, in the bubble was dry ice and then they pop it and it would like. - Yeah, yeah. - You know, like, it was the fucking undertaker. - I kind of fuck with desserts when they have like a presentation like that, where it's like, oh, he's super. - Super. - The only one that I've never gotten is I'm not a big fan of cooked fruit, is like bananas foster. - It's where the bananas come on fire. - Or like baked Alaska, I've never gotten that one either, but that one, they like that shit of blaze, bitch. - What's that? - I think it's like, there's like a cream and they light it up. - They just light cream on fire. - But we went to that place that steakhouse in Austin. They do the fire steak, remember? The salt comes on fire? - Yeah. - That shit was sick. - I kind of like when they do that type of shit too, where they like pour fire on shit. And I'm like, this is dope. - Oh yeah. - I almost bought a kitchen torch the other day. - What do you need that for? - I'm not kidding you, I would use it for nothing. - Yeah. - But like, I was like this, it would be cool to have. - Or like lighting a cigar. - That's what my dad does. - Yeah. - My dad lights his cigars, black and miles, with a full on plumbers torch. - Right. - Oh yeah. And it's like, that the tank-- - It's got the giant tank, and literally he'll be like, I'm gonna light a cigar. Gzzz. And I'm like, so overkill, dad. - Also, dange. - Could be dange. - I mean here, I've been plumber. Do you fight years? - Okay. - I've been plumber. - That's what his fucking defense would be too. - My friends have a couple of those torches. - I'm into it. - I like zippo lighters. - It's not for cooking. - Dude, zippos. - I'm a whore for zippos. - I don't like how the gas dries up. - I mean, that's normal. I mean, ugh. - I mean, you just fill it with the liquid. You could buy the liquid for like eight bucks. - Yeah, but then it dries. Like if you don't use all of it, like it just goes away. - If it's in the tin, it should say good for a long, long time. - But like, the one that I bought, it's like, you stuff it with like a cotton or something, yeah. - And then you pour the whatever in. But like, and then eventually if you don't use it, it just like kind of evaporates. Dude, I love it because like, I feel like I'm gonna drop it on like a trail of gas and blow something up. - I would love to blow things up like that. Like just like, so close. - Shing. - And just like walk away, like a leather jacket. - It is really cool that in movies like that, people walk away from the explosion because if I'm exploding something, I'll look in. I don't have it in me to like, - Well, those are well experienced explorers. - Yeah, they're like desensitized. - They're exploding all the time. Like of course, like Wolverine is walking away because like no one gives a fuck. He's done so many explosions. - Yeah. - You know? - Isn't it funny how Hollywood decided that like, walking out of an exploded house is fire. Like it is. It is also like the concussive blast of the explosion would fuck you up. - Put you down. - Cause that's like, that will get you. - I don't like explosions, man. Too loud. I don't like them. Have you ever seen an explosion like in Percy? - The only explosion that I've seen. I'm not gonna make that joke. - Don't, don't, don't, don't. - We've already, we're already there. We're already in trouble. - No, no, no. But I did see, remember when Universal had that ride? - Yeah, like a stunt show. - Oh, like water world. - They would have like explosions, but it was like hot. - Well, yeah, you didn't see it. You saw more of a like, - Controlled explosion. - Not even an explosion. It was just like a shooting of fire. - Yeah. They explode some things. Some of the stunt shows. I don't know, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if I've ever seen like an actual explosion. - Trying to think, I can't remember like, if I have seen an explosion or not. What are we counting as explosion? Like boom, like an explosion. What are we talking about here? - We know an explosion. - What an awesome name for it too. - Explosion. Explosion, congrats to the word people. It's almost like, yeah, whoever it, yeah, yeah, you're right. - Whoever. - The Latin people, I don't know. - I don't even know. Yeah, where does the term explode come from? It's probably like Greek and it was like, "Explobia explosion." Like if I, I feel like you can meet like a Baltic dude and that's like his name. - I feel like that's something your brother would name another child if they had another boy. (laughing) - I love you Tom. - We're thinking explosion. - Yeah. - I mean, honestly, like peak need for speed underground to Frankie might have named his child explosion. - Yeah, if I had to live by the decisions that I was making at that age, it would be a completely different world. - Yeah, your kids' names would be explosion, Steve McNair, and fucking, you know, simple plan. (laughing) - Yeah, what? - I'd have weird tattoos, NBA inside drive. - Jesus. - What a game, yeah. - What a game, that is a good one. - Anything on the origins of the word explosion. - Yeah, there's a couple of things. Rome, it's, well, first let's go. - No way, it's Italians. - Let's go Latin for Italian. - It's a explodere. - That's French. - Explodere? - How do you spell it? - E-X-P-L-O-D-E-R-E. Explodere? - Explodere, that's probably it, because they love to do that, S-A-Q-A-V-D-R-A, and it actually means to drive out by clapping or to clap someone off stage, similar to the word applause, honestly. It's like clapping. - Whoa, applause explosion. - Not close enough, honestly. - I thought, what was that? - I met more of the meaning, not the phonetics. (laughing) - So like, when we were done at MSG, they exploded us off the stage. - I think it's more negative, but technically you guys were exploded on the MSG stage. - Yeah. - Damn. - I mean, I was about to-- - I'm cool with that, honestly. 'Cause I don't think I've ever exploded. - I've never exploded. - They're at Neil. - He's still going, Neil. - He's still going. - Horn's up, it's fine. - Huh? - What? - It's just a horn's up, that's it's fine. - Is that like a Texas thing? - That was like a horny thing. Oh, it is a Texas thing, you're right. - Horn's up. - Where are you, brother? - Where are you? - Is that like a motto you live by? - Sure. - So, you want more? I feel like I gave a lot there. - No, I'm more concerned with how horny you are during this recording. - I'm not right now. You two seem way more horny than me. - Yeah, I do, but I definitely don't, I definitely don't. - Yeah, I mean, you got the fishnet shirt on, so you're pretty like, - Oh, you're taking a page out of the Joe Sanagato book for shirts. - I need way more nipples. - Book for shirts. - Not me, I'm buttoned up. Like, you're never catching me nipples out. Even when I have, I have shirts that are more like knitted. I mean, we've seen your nipples on the internet. - You wore a tape suit. - Taped up, brother. - Yeah, but that was like, damn, that was crazy that I did that. - You remember how bad I broke out in a rash? - Bro, yes, I remember that stuff coming off of you and it was insane. - Dude, I broke out in a really bad rash right here 'cause it like clogged my pores. - Bro, also, if you want to humble yourself, tape up your body a little bit and look at it in the mirror. - And look at it in the mirror. - Yo, it was. - Well, hold on. - It literally is. - I loved it. - It's like, it's like, I was the one that got taped up. You want to be humble. Look at him. He can fill me pink. - No, I've done it too, though. - That taped fully up. - Ab you? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you get like tape on you and then you pull it off and you're like, yo, why is this like cloudy? - I think, well, yeah, 'cause it's pulling the natural oils off of your skin. - Oh. - All the Canada on, man. - All the Canada is filthy. - Canada, yes. - Great call back, dude. - Absolutely, great call back. - It's all in here, baby. - I think we should do another Patreon goal that Joe this time has to do the tape suit. - First of all, we got to do our-- - Oh, yeah. - That's right. - Which is coming. We should probably say. - You should probably say that. - Next week. - Oh, yeah. - Next week? - Well, actually, no. Oh, shit, this is a week. - If you're on Patreon and seeing it, it'll be this Friday. - It's been so off the rails, I forget that this is weekly. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - But we are doing it on Patreon. Double, what was it? Edward 40 hands. - Yeah. - You could also tell them that it's already up if they want to sign up for Patreon. - Oh, you can. - You're on the show, too, so you just said it. - Yeah, why don't you fuck all day? - This is fucking-- - You're right. Go sign up. - Yeah, it's on Patreon right now. I mean, I'm assuming that me and Frank are gonna be a little toasty that day, for sure. - Yeah, if all goes well, it's up. 'Cause, you know, we could run into some-- - I don't know how-- I know how I'm gonna get home, 'cause you're gonna send a car, but I'm going to have to bring bottles in the car with me for piss. - And, like, I'm not even kidding, I'm worried. - Gatorade bottle. - I'm up here. - Yeah, wouldn't you? Like, think about it like this. You. Like, we might want to record that first and let that kind of, like, set the tone and tenor for the rest of the day. - Oh, that's scary. - Why? - Because then we're going, like, drunk into a full episode. - That's about it. - We could do Patreon. Do we have a sandwich out of studios video to do that day? - We always do. - So then, then we can do that, and then, hopefully, it'd be sober up a little bit by the time the weekly bottle is over. - We could try it. - We can try it. - Okay. - Well, a little college try. - Let's figure it out. - Yeah. - But, listen, thank you guys so much for-- - Yeah, what an episode. I'm not kidding. - Oh, man. - This one ain't gonna end up on an airplane. (laughing) - No, no. - No, it won't work. - Yeah, you guys are gonna be like, no. - No, no. - No, no, no. - You didn't tell me this about cooking cock. (laughing) - I can't wait to see that on the internet. But yeah, thank you guys so much, Frank. We're gonna find out. - The Frank Alvarez all over the place. Go check out patreon.com/thebasementyard. Again, if you're seeing this on Patreon, this week, June 17th, at 12 p.m. Eastern, the pre-sale code for the show is pre-sale of-- sorry, pre-sale availability for the shows. Find it at thebasementyard.com, and the pre-sale code is basement. Very easy to remember. It's literally our name. Go check it out. - Ant. - Find me at antprisco on Instagram. - You guys go follow me at Joe Senegal. Go follow the show at thebasementyard on TikTok and Instagram. And that is all. See you guys next time. - Bye!