#537 - The New Drag Queens

Welcome back to The Basement Yard. I forgot the podcast. Oh, yes. None of that. Welcome back to Show From Basement. Let's leave that in 2025. Why? Because I don't know what you're doing. I'm working on an impression. What is that of? Like 90s European club goer. One more time. Oh, so let's show this Welcome Back to Basement. How are you doing, Anthony? Doing good. You don't think that's pretty good? Welcome back to Basement. I saw a clip from the movie Euro Trip. Whoa, I need to watch that again. Yo, first of all, there's some stuff in it that is not aged well. They dropped some F words in there. But it was the 2000s. Just let them rip, basically, the 90s. Yeah, the priests were saying it probably. They probably still say it. Yeah, they were probably-- I don't think that-- Yeah, I don't know why. I don't know why I was there. I don't think the level of like acceptable behavior should be priests are doing it. I agree. They use a different F word. Fondle? What was the word that you were going to go with, father? Yep, I probably should have. I messed up. We'll edit out. Don't mix. You're going to do it, do it. No, but I saw a clip from Euro Trip. Yeah. And I was like, damn, I haven't watched this movie in like four, five years. And then before that, like 12, 15 years. And it's worth another-- listen, people forget Scotty doesn't know came from there. It's a great song, you know? It's probably the greatest fake a song ever, right? Ooh, that's a good question. Cheetah girl's cheetah sisters had some hits. It's a real song. Well, it was a song in a movie that they've been released as a song. I think the same thing happened with Scotty doesn't know. Was it like a made up? It was Matt Damon. Oh, maybe it was an actual band probably that did it. It was Matt Damon. Yeah. It was a hard one. No, I know that, but-- And he was just, you know, basically about-- he was getting cucked. Yeah. He was at the party and he was getting cucked. Yeah, she was in my van or whatever he says in the car. Scotty doesn't know. That Fiona and me do it in my van every Sunday. Pimp. Dude, so recently, I-- So it snowed the other night. You don't like snow. I'm sorry, you didn't like my-- You're my your old guy. Well documented. It snowed the other night. You probably got a lot of snow. No, we got ice. Yeah, brother. About snow? A couple of weeks ago, we got about a foot. A foot? Yeah. How do we live in different worlds? I don't know. We got about a foot a couple of weeks ago. You guys got snow here, too. Really? Yeah, it wasn't crazy. So there was-- it was about-- Hello. It was big, man. I mean, that's all you shoveling. You see that snow? You didn't see me huffing and puffing. No, I'm saying like it just snowed. And you shoveled. Well, that's because it was ice underneath. And then it was like a little beep beep of snow on top. That sucked. Let me tell you, chopping away at that sucked butt. I almost slipped and fucking lay it on my ice hood. Well, yeah, I did-- you can't damage the money maker. Don't say that. Don't you dare say that. What is going to happen when people find out you have an only fans? It's like, where are you going with this? I can see the only hands of what? It's just my asshole. It would be just your asshole. And you'd be talking like Ace Ventura. It's a close-up. It's getting-- it makes you die, dude. Are you OK? I was just picturing it. You were picturing my whole-- How dare you, bro? Yeah. Why are you coughing? You should be what you normally do when you hear about Joey naked. Goon. Too much? Too much, huh? Oh, does that make you like your spit dick thing in his asshole? Does it make you what? What was the first line? Your spit dick. Oh, also what? You never heard that say? When people like, when you're going to throw up, it makes your spit dick. Oh, no, I've never heard of that. Really? Yeah. That's going to say we're on pace, though. Not the first thing that you've said that I haven't heard. I mean, we picked up on that last-- It's a real saying. It's a real saying, making the tongue to lick some bull. Making my spit dick is a real-- Now you can see now-- Look it up. Look it up. Just Google, look it up here on the computer. Look it up here. Make my spit's getting thick. No, do not tie that in at all. What do you want me to-- type in, you know what? This is a-- Yeah, it's going to be-- Well, Josh might have to edit it out. OK. Type in making my spit dick. My spit is getting thick, saying. No, no. This is why I want that. Oh! Oh, no, it's how to make my-- It's how to make my spit dick. No, no, no, just say making my spit dick. It's supposed to be an expression. So just click that, and we're probably going to see some things. Type in expression at the end of this, because already we have nothing. OK. So let's type in expression. OK. Thank you. Oh, well. OK, good. One for one. Thank you. No, one for two. Oh, one for two. One for one. What do you mean the other one was a fucking saying? I'm not-- I'm not relitigating this. It was a real saying. OK. It makes your spit dick. OK. Oh. Ew, it's so-- I don't like that at all. I love it. It does that, and he's just like, come on. He just goes, OK. But I-- so it snowed the other night, and I was like, I was in the house all day. You almost hurt your asshole. No. So I went for-- You didn't hurt your asshole. I didn't hurt my asshole. It's perfectly fine. You check. Shut up. I went for a run, and it was like snowing, and then I found $20. Oh. And I was like, wait, you running the snow? With what boots? No, I ran with regular shoes. Brother, you're playing with fire. Well, the snow was like perfectly-- Oh, it was like 90s snow. It was before anyone could get to it. 90s snow is what we referred to it as. Because like, perfect packing snow. It was like 8 o'clock, and no one was really on the road. And La Manana. This was two nights ago. So at night, you went. Yeah. And La Noche. See? Wow. But there was no one out there because it was the day after Christmas, so no one's like working or whatever. Do me a favor. It hit perfect. I have a couple questions for you. There was a lot of crunch, Frank. I, first of all, I love the sound of snow crunching under a shoe. Second of all. Did you do the typical-- And if you didn't do this, and if you didn't do this, if you didn't do this, you get a pass. Did you do the thing where you just stop and listen and hear? Nothing. Yeah, I took a video of it. Dude, it is such-- when I was kind of chopping away at the ice in my driveway, I just stopped and put-- I held my fucking-- like, I'm farmer, Dan. I held my shovel. And I was just like, oh, the earth. Like, I'm the rock, you know, it's like-- Yeah. It actually looked like the John Ham meme right there. It did look like it, yeah. Oh. Yeah, there you go. Oh. Very raw. We're under it. Yeah. No, but I went for a run and then I-- That date, dude, you got to be here. You almost slipped. Had you find out? No, the next-- how did I find it? I would run by. I was like, that's $20. But wasn't the snow of covered the money? It was like in a-- it was like-- So there's like part of the homeless person's hand. Yeah. It was like-- it was in a cup. I took it. No, it was-- like, you know how trees have branches? No, but it's like there's brick around it. And it's like where the dirt is. Green streets as they're called here in New York City. Is that what they're called? But like, the snow is on the branches. So underneath it, it's not that much snow yet. So that's where I saw it. And I was like, oh, I made $20. So it was super high about that. I mean, we are getting to an age of falling being dangerous. So you need to like-- No, Frank. Brother. We're 33. Brother. We're not 53. But falling is not like, ha ha. Falling get up, like you get right back up anymore. Like, when's the last time you fell? This is the last time I fell. It's 2026. No one falls. Brother, people still fall. You're not supposed to fall anymore. You're not supposed to. What are you going to do? I mean, listen, I fell off my bed the other day. And, huh? What were you doing jumping on it? I was playing with Ruby. Oh, OK. And we do this game-- I'm not going to tell you the name because you're going to laugh at it. But it's the cutest thing in the world. Give it, hold on. No, go. Just say it. No, I'm not going to say it. Why? I'm not going to make fun of this. You will. And I know you will. You love doing that. You do too. It's a game you play with your daughter. It's cute. It's the name. She doesn't know how to say destroyers. So she says destroyers. What am I going to say to that? You're going to look at-- oh my god, your stupid daughter has a speech in bed in it. Is that what I'm going to say? You hear that? You hear that? Destroyers? You hear that? Very non-yorrowous, you max of years. I cannot wait to this once retired. No, so yeah, jokingly. What's the-- it's called "Stroilers" where we just, like, basically like Power Rangers. Like, I'm going to use my eyesblast. And like, she does like a twirl. And she's like, ha, ha, nice try. And then she like kicks me. And the game always ends with me on the side of the bed, and she uses her "Stroiler Powers" to push me into the lava. But brother, like, if your bed is this high off the ground, and then your mattress is this high off the ground. That's what just is bigger than that. Way too high for a mattress. And what? What are you sleeping on? A fucking roll of parchment? This is the floor. Oh. Yeah, you think I'm going from the floor floor? Like I'm gonna sleep in a college bed like a mattress that you're gonna jump on it. No, if this is the floor and this is the bed frame And then the mattress comes up to about here mattresses are fucking thick, dude It sits in the bed and it sits in a little bit Bro if I'm falling. Yeah, two and a half feet. Yeah, that's a that's a long fall Long it's it's like you think it's not go fall Roll off your bed at two and a half feet and tell me it doesn't like. Oh shit. That kind of hurts Go home. Do me a favor. Go home roll off your bed Get your ass on you sit here. You make fun of my expressions that are real by the way All right, and then I tell you something like that. And you're not even gonna go and try it Fall off my bed and hurt myself. No, I'm just saying we are approaching an age where it is harder For us after a fault to get up. So you going out and running. I'm trying to protect you here Going out. Thank you and running in the snow with no proper footwear Cover footwear Dude, you could get hurt man or you could be running and someone's on the road and they lose control and They hit you. Yeah, they could I mean I'm not running in the street like that I mean the whole idea of losing control is that they are gonna go up on the sidewalk Sure you run on the sidewalk of the street. I feel like you're a street runner I usually try to run in the because where I am is not very busy especially in the winter so I run in the bike lane But it's sectioned off. Oh, okay. Yeah, it's just that people probably hate you for that Oh, if there's bikers. Yeah, I mean, but it's a two-way one Oh, so they can go around so they can go around and hit another biker. Yeah. Oh, it's so you found $20. What do you do with the $20? I invested it and I turned it into three million dollars. Here's how it's no, it's I Welcome at 4 a.m. Because if you sleep past six, you're a pussy. No, I put it in my pocket and it remains in your pocket Yeah, let me see it. No, not this pocket in my jacket pocket that I ran Bring it next time Okay, I want to see it. I was planning on I was just gonna like give it to someone if I saw them if like they were like homeless or something But I didn't see anyone. Well I had my eyes closed No, I mean like if I saw a homeless person I'll give it to them. I was up Can't see him if your eyes are closed. That's right. Yeah, that's it got you got you got you got you got you got you got a different thing Um, that's a that's a weird trend. Let's do something fun and make homeless people the butt of our jokes in our studio wouldn't that be something? Wouldn't that make us good? Let's do that done. What do you think, Ann? I'm here to observe today. That was good because I was trying to bring you in down with us and you didn't take the bait That's PR. Well, first of all, I am not going down with the ship And I will go down with this ship. Love that melody Well, now I'll take it back. I'll go down with any ship with you. He's not gonna go down with you crazy Kid of me. I'm the fucking co-capped into this ship, bitch Seems like I'm riding I'm riding port seems like you just where are you? You're in the fucking booty a little. What's it called in the back? I only know starbird import that's left and right the the mast And the ass. Yeah, skipper That's the one that I want to be in a crow's nest Dude, I want to be in a crow's nest and have one of these Yeah, you know what I'm talking about those work and they can't They absolutely can't I mean if pirates use them, they've got to be stupid Yeah, because pirates we can offend pirates now, right? I don't know any I mean no I don't think like what they were the version of pirates that we've come to know and really exist anymore pirates exist Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're scary and I'm not gonna offend them do your pirating right But like big hat Beads in the hair drag Sure. Yeah, like it's a form of drag. It's C drag Yeah, you know, it's like we're gonna be crime, but we're gonna dress up Oh, that would be my my drag name if I were a pirate You haven't said drag in oh C drag but my name would be in oh like C dragon I'm confused about what your name is C dragon Is that not a good name for a drag pirate? I wonder what my like like what's a booty Jones Booty Jones is a great drag name booty Jones. I'm a pirate Booty Jones, that's a good one. I need one like Like uh something to electric uh Plunder queen. I don't like that. No, well, you're staying on pirate well because you're are you not a drag pirate? Oh I'm gonna be a pirate. Oh you can go other Types of drag performers. Yeah, yeah What so like it but it's some good drag names type in drag put in drag name generator Generator. I love names. Oh man based on name. That's a good one because Joe would be something like Josephine Santa got tits or something That's actually kind of not bad. Oh, we got categories. Oh, okay Funny puns funny puns sexy puns sexy puns Oh So sexy pun sexy pun sexy puns sexy puns. Okay name me. Oh, all right. What are you going first me? I think Joey should go. May. May. May. Absolutely Myra heat my myra heat myra heat myra heat. I don't know, but that's a sexy fucking name. Heat in a name is great That's a nice name too. All right. That's not bad. Which one do you want? Yeah, you can go now. Yeah, go to your category And pretty category. No, oh, pick a category. Yeah Oh, let me go horror. Let me go horror horror. You love horror. It's gonna be like Michael Myers with Tits. Yeah, right. Yeah, ready Venoma Vesper. Oh my god. That is sexy. That's a good one. I know my Vesper. That's a really good one. Love that. I'm I'm A diamond and you got to have like a little green from here for venom Okay, what's yours? What's yours? What's yours? What's your categories? Take your drag name a pageant queen. What it? What is Frank? Let's No, I don't like that because I'm stupid Stupid just I'll be stupid. I'll be stupid for you. We're gonna do the other ones anyway. We're so excited. I don't even say anything All right, my stupid drag name would be Yolanda dumpster Hell yeah You my reheat Venoma Vesper Yolanda dumpster baby. I got that trash back there. You know what I'm saying? Oh man. Oh hell yeah. Oh yeah Dumpster My shit is stinky baby. Are you flexing? I mean we need to do one for every category. Absolutely. We need to do one for every category. So next is Joe You have to pick another category, but not ones we've used. Oh stop from the top, ma'am. Give me give me modern drag Yeah, give me modern drag on a drag. He's a modern guy. Look at him. He looks like he looks like he has glasses on Kira quirk. It's a little close. It's so close to what? Nothing. No, they don't worry about it. Kira quirk Uh, is it close? I don't even know. It's kind of close. I mean the RK Kira quirk congrats Thank you All right diva celebrity. Oh, this is gonna be like for me. Wait, but what if I want alternative? Take a look at it You know what you can do. You are alternative. I can see that you do like to listen a lot of alternative music What you got let's see what you got Saro posh You're like an emo I imagine you with long black hair and bangs that come to the top of your eyelids and hits the size of beach balls That's cool. Sure. Yeah, and like it's hard. That's cool. Posh though. Posh. Posh. Posh. She needs you need to be in red bottoms Yeah, that's fine Are you trying to admit after you're gonna be diva? Um, I'll be diva celebrity. Yeah Let's see what we got going on here. This is like See you later That fucking sucks so bad That's so bad bring me back to Yolanda dumpster See you later. That sucks. Oh, you need another one roll for me again. Come on I can't be see a leader. This is just this is if the next one is in a wild crocodile. I'm gonna fucking lose my mind This is your calling. This is who this is who you are. That's just who I feel like I find you another one Yeah, you mean other Mariah scary could be worse than anyone we've seen. Honestly, that's kind of somehow worse than see a leader All right, go back and I'll do pageant queen. Oh, yeah, he is ready. Yeah Braille Saint James. That is the horniest name that that's a porn star name Braille Saint James. I imagine it is like a one of the like women in Austin powers Like this is Braille Saint James. Yeah, and then she just like comes out and sucks on a chest piece or something Yeah It was a lot of time you saw Austin powers and last two here. I'm gonna go cutesy. So you're leaving me with funny puns or sex Yeah, you're gonna get funny puns. Of course. I am. I'll go cutesy. Okay, cutesy baby. Here we go Taffy toots That sounds like you fart string does a little bit Tap it to it tap it that yeah, I guess I'm stuck with silly string funny puns Here we go. There's another sea later. I'm gonna fucking lose my shit. All right. Here. We go Stirner who they suck. I just thought I get the shitty ones. Give me a cool. Give me a sexy pun one Okay, give me a better name than that. You want sexy fun. Go. Go. Oh Bibi vice. Oh, that's a good one. Bibi vice. Yeah. Wow. That's good. Yolanda dumpster. Oh my god Dude that fucking murder. Oh, that's a good. That's a good one. Well, how did we get on the top of a good drag? I have no idea. Oh, I said that pirates were drag queens. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Sea dragon. I think Yolanda dumpster man Or oh my name. I know a good pirate drag name Rum Bucket I get it, but Rum Bucket because Come. Bucket. I got it Am I hearing pneumonia? Stuff happening here While Frank's putting it together, we do have some sponsors for today. The first one being Squarespace, um, Squarespace is a website or a platform that you're going to build your website on, okay? 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That would be patreon is calling I believe Patrons on the line patreon is calling are you gonna pick up the call? patreon.com/thebasement yard if you like this show we kindly ask that you go check out that little website What do you get to get there where you're going to see that there are a couple different tears and if you sign up for those tears There might be some benefits that come along with them that first year you get these week episodes seven whole days in advance So you'll get in on the conversation the last that he he's the ha ha's one week before everybody else Okay, and then that second tear guess what guess what you get take a while guess Exclusive episodes I said at first we said at the same time. We're finishing each other sentences if you get exclusive episodes every single Friday Isn't that fun? Isn't that neat? It's nice. I think it's nice. You guys have been so supportive and loving and we appreciate it so much. Thank you That's for you and for those of you that don't and haven't been there I'm taking it back and I'm gonna hold it until you go to patreon.com/thebasement yard and if you do it on a web browser guess what? You save yourself some money if you want to sign up if you sign up with an app they're gonna take extra money from you You don't want that put my money back in your pocket. Okay, don't don't don't give it to the tech overlords that are slowly You know draining us of all of everything that we have go check it out or not Cool kids are doing it though patreon.com/thebasement yard You can also check out TBY Tor merch.com Or not check out if it's any leftover tour merch from our tour maybe maybe you check it out. I don't know What the hell is that? Well, why do you give me the allowance to do that? Why do you allow me to do that? I wonder how long you could like if you did a podcast by yourself like How long do you think you could go? an hour Yeah, I I Years ago when I did the the wrestling podcast. I there were a couple of like not a lot There were like one or two episodes where I did by myself, and I just talked and Rattle it just rattled. I mean, but it that was different because that was about a thing so like we talk about like Run and smack down on the NXT and yada yada so like I had stuff to talk about to fill the time. Yeah, but like Here letting it just let it rip maybe maybe we fuck around Maybe we have a just frank episode and we see what gets what happens. It's got wild. You know, see where it goes That would be interesting to hear Why I mean just cuz whenever Like before you just recorded an ad for standing out of studios and like Sometimes he just goes on tangents, and it's like the ad is supposed to be like two minutes and it's 50 minutes of food Well, I I like to take the approach of just like I'm gonna do it Well, you know like that's that's the approach I like to take like I'm gonna try to do this thing well. Yeah, like So when we do an ad I try to read it and do it and add a little bit because that's what these companies want They want a little yeah, you know, they want a little paprika in there. They don't want just salt and pepper Right, so that my mentality definitely going into 2026 as well as like if you're gonna do something do it well Wow As opposed to doing it poorly, right? Well, I mean, yeah, why that's good. I value I value No, great in the effort. No, I try to do it well. No good. I mean sometimes things end up being good Honestly profound groundbreaking stuff if you're gonna do it do it well not something I've ever heard before And I'm I'm taking that energy into 26 as well. I mean, what's funny about that? I think that's a that's a legitimate thing to bring in to anyone's life when you do like if you're going to like I'm at a point in my life where my mentality is like if you're going to do something try to do it well Recent point in your life. I don't I don't understand what's so funny about that. It's just Funny because you're saying it in a way like you've created I mean, I do think that like there is a bit of this Mentality with people I don't get what's funny. I'm not even laughing I'm just I'm smiling. There is definitely like a a I'm coming to a point in my life where I'm seeing people do stuff And they're just like whatever I don't want to do that. I want to like Make it good. Yeah, so if I'm going to do it if I'm committing to do something you want my mentality is like It's going to be pretty darn good. Right. I'm gonna try to make it as as good as it could be would you say that? Would you say that? Like does this resonate with you? And this is something I just came up with just do it. I Don't like that. I know that's Nike's. I Don't I don't like that because in my head just doing it Isn't enough isn't enough. You got to do it well. You need to do it well. If you're gonna do it do it well I think and where'd you hear that or that just came to you? I Was I was sitting outside the other night and I was hanging out I had a drink. Yeah, and I was thinking like okay. I Know you don't like doing this. I at the end I at the end of the year I do look at new years as like a bit of a transition point like I do look at it as like it's an end Here's a start so toward the end of the year I also do this around my birthday. I sit outside and I reflect back on the last year and I look forward And what I want to do for the next year So in in my time kind of being self-reflective. I thought like okay If you're going to do something in 2026 do it well. I Don't get such a troll bro. It's crazy You're trolling me. I'm not trolling like the Patreon reads, those are memorable. Why? Because I go in with the mentality of like, all right, if you're going to do this, make it good. Like better than good. Pretty good. Yeah. I think pretty good is less than good. I feel less. Pretty good. Pretty good. It depends how you emphasize it. 2026 is going to be a life changing year for all of us. And I think that if we go in with the mentality of like, that the thing that we do, we got to do them all. Yeah. Duh. Yeah. I mean, it's such a simple concept, but you have to say it. How much of life is so simple that we forget to acknowledge it. It's good for you trolling. Why am I trolling when I'm expressing myself? First of all, don't turn this around because you know what you're doing. You sort of have been. Honestly, I'm in. Thank you. You are really good. You are a really, really good standard for doing something well because you and the streams and everything, you guys do a lot of really good stuff. I'm not fucking around. Now I'm getting confused. No, I don't want to be in it. Now I don't know what's happening anymore. Bro, you guys stream consistently. You put out stuff. It's funny. It keeps you engaged and stuff like that. So my mentality is like, I was thinking about you doing this. If I'm going to do something, I want to do it, well, like what's crazy? All right. I think you just want it because I think that that is the right sentiment. What you're trying to do is say that as many times as you possibly can and I know that you're trolling. I'm trying to explain it in a way that is the most digestible. And give you your flowers. I mean, Jesus Christ, I just, I enjoy roses. Do you? What? What would you do if I got you a bouquet of flowers? You'd be like, oh, thanks. I would think you were thinking about me and I would love that. Oh, wow. Nice. I don't know what I'd do with them. What does anyone do with them? Smell them. How many put them in a pot of water? Yeah. You'd just display them. I would display them. That's very nice. We talked about this years ago. I love flowers. Hmm. Favorite flower? I forgot? You know, I'm not really sure, but I really like tulips. I like a tulip. I like tulips. Those are Rebecca's flower. I don't even think I knew what tulip existed before Becca. Tulip? I feel like that's a-- oh. Oh, there's one that's a fucking-- it's big and it's got a fat ass. Orcids? No. God. Type in Orcids. It's something with an A. Orcids? A-ness. Orcids are like-- aren't they like one of the hardest flowers to like maintain? I couldn't tell you. I've never had one. I believe they're like famously known to like be very difficult and look straight up. Yeah. I see what you're doing. A little bit. It's like a real-- it's like a flower ball and then it blooms into a beautiful flower. It has-- it's such an A though, I think. I can't type an A flower. It'll just show up. Go back. There was a thing of like flower names. Flowers beginning with the letter A. What is it? What is it? Is it on here? Or that first one? I can't. It's a time. It's a time. It's not even zooming it in. Oh, here we go. Scroll down. Aster. Peony. Yo. Peony is not an A at all. I know. It's not. Look up. Look up. Oh, oh. Did you mean Aster? No, no. Peony, I meant. Didn't mean okay. Cut it. Look up. Look up. Peony's. Look up. Look up. Peony's. Look up. Peony's. You know how those got their name. Yeah. People were combing their dicks with it. Okay. Oh, water lilies are also beautiful. What do we want? Peony. Dude, a big fucking like it. It looks like a baseball of flowers. And then it blooms and it's beautiful. My sister likes Peony's. They're beautiful. Yeah, they're good flowers. Yeah. It looks like ice cream. I would eat that. I would eat that. Fuck out of that. I would eat up flowers. I'd be eating flowers. What? What? I don't think that's that crazy. I mean, you're in the packaging that your Amazon package is show up with. Peony's very pretty. Orchids tall, but very pretty. Yeah. Some flowers pretty, but then get real ugly real quick. I feel about mums. I'm in on mums. I like mums. I like mums. But like one of those mums get real pretty and then they're fucking hideous. Yeah, yeah. You know, like, I like something that has longevity. But you brought up money before and I wanted to bring this up. I saw one. I'm going to ask you guys. You love doing these ant questions, but it's not an ant question at the time. It's a Frank question. Oh, stole your segment. Frank Wesshawna. Frank Wesshawna. I mean, he's doing it well. If he's going to do it, he's going to do it well. And that's what I think you guys are making fun of that because that's something I've seriously like tried to bring into like 2026. Yeah, but I don't know if you're being serious. Because you see with the cameras on me, you start laughing. You're scuffing. No, I'm not. So I don't know what's happening here. I was. I am. Don't repeat it. I'm only going to not believe it even more. Mar. Mar. Mar. Mar. Mar. That was VB vice talking right now. You're VB vice. I'm VB. Why? Your salt, salt, salt. Mirror heat. Mirror pounder or something. You're. I'm fucking Yolanda dumpster. All right. All right. All right. You're a lot of the dumpster. So you could only pick one of these. Okay. A million dollars a day. This is post-tax by the way. Or non-tax. Let me say. Thank you. I know that's a big topic in conversation. A hundred million dollars instant. Okay. Ten thousand dollars per minute. Or one thousand dollars per second. Now, I know this probably smart, like something smart. I mean, there's one easy distinction. The second one, what was it? That's out of there. Instead of ten thousand per. It's a thousand per second, which is insane. Yeah, but what was it? Ten thousand? That one? No, it was ten thousand a minute. Ten thousand a minute. One thousand a second. A hundred million instant. Or one million per day. Ten thousand a second. No, one thousand a second. Are you kidding me? Sorry, ten thousand a minute. Sorry. Why? I think I would do a thousand. I mean, that's the easy answer. That's like the easy one. You just want to say no, because I'll just do a thousand a second. Give it to me again. I got to write it down. A thousand. A thousand. A second. Okay. That means per sixty seconds, it's sixty thousand dollars. Or ten thousand dollars per minute. Per minute. Yes. Get rid of the ten thousand dollars per minute. Easily out. That's a very easy one. A hundred million. That's bad, that's bad, that's bad. A hundred million instantly. Or a million dollars per day. Okay. I think the answer is the second. I would say, no, I would say it's a million dollars a day. I think it's a, it's the seconds. Isn't there a lot of seconds in the day? What's sixty times twenty-four? Yeah. I mean. Eh. I'll look it up. It's a one point two. Sixty times. No, that's not right. Twenty-four. It's fourteen forty. So it's fourteen forty minutes in a day. So times that by sixty. Because that's sixty thousand. That's eighty-six thousand dollars. So a million dollars a day would be the smart thing to do. Wait. What did you just do? Yeah. You did that wrong. You did twenty-four. That's hours, brother. How many seconds are in a day? Sorry, I'm not doing this quite well. It's sixty times sixty. I'm not doing this quite well. Sixty times sixty. So sixty times twenty-four. There's an easier way, fellas. How many seconds? It's in a day. And it is eighty-six thousand four hundred seconds. So eighty-six thousand four hundred times. What was it? Sixty thousand. No. Oh yeah. That's wrong. What's going on? Wait. Stop. Stop. A thousand dollars a second. So sixty times sixty. Now we've got hours. Time is twenty-four. Eighty-six four thousand. Eighty-six four hundred times a thousand is eighty-six million. Eighty-six million a day. Really? Yeah, that's what I wrote and I thought that was wrong. Yeah, that doesn't it. I have a feeling that I'm going to pick that one. Yeah, that's the one. I didn't do that well. [Laughter] Eighties-six thousand dollars. Eighty-six seconds in a day. [Laughter] It's fucked up, guys. It's okay. Forgive me. You didn't do that well. But it's the big hits. Technically, when we're recording it. When we are recording pre-2026, it is 2025. So the end of 2026 hits. I won't be doing shit like that ever again. Everything I'll do from here on out will have much a plum. It will. [Laughter] What was the other one? It was like a million a day. Dude, imagine having a like a thousand dollars per second. Like literally you go into- I mean, that's like- Do you ever see the- It was like a TikTok and it was like Jeff Bezos walking through an Amazon warehouse. And it was like, he goes up to workers. And they're just like, hey, and the workers are like, hey, congrats on everything. You're doing great. And on there like chest it has like- How much they're making. How much they're earning per second. And he's in like obviously thousands of dollars. And I saw some stat that Bill Gates, if he saw a hundred dollar bills on the ground, picking it up is not worth his time compared to how much he's making per day. Like the amount of time to pick up that hundred dollar bill, he already made it. Oh my god. it cost you to pick up that 20 that you found. Let's do that Joe makes one - What, 50 million dollars a year? - Oh, my hand, imagine. 50, oh, trust me, I think about making that money all the time, okay? He makes 50 million a year. - Okay. - Do you guys have a dollar amount that is an advance seriously? - Do you guys have a dollar amount that you're like, "All right, if I had that, then I would just be doing good." Like, you have an enough number? - Say 50 million is around there. - I mean, yeah, I don't know. - Why are you thinking? - You think like a cartoon character. - He was like, oh, 50 million. - In the account, 50 million would be nice. - Yeah, of course. - 10? - 10? You don't, you don't, you think if you had 10 million dollars, you'd be like, "All right, I need to get a like." - If I got 10 million dollars, I'd be like, "Oh man, this might not last forever." If I had 50 million dollars, I would-- - What? - 10 million. - Yeah. - How is that not gonna last forever? You were just saying, you would OBJ, you were on the phone the other day, and you were just like, "It's so hard for us, guys." - You were just like this. - No, I think I can make 10 million less for a life of course. - 10. - No, but if you're giving me, if like, what's the question? - The question is like, "What do you need?" I'll say like 50. 'Cause what are they gonna say? Like, no, do it for 30. I'd be like, okay. - Well, no one's gonna put the money in your account. I meant just like, if there's a number in your account. - You never know. You wonder if there's any billionaires watching this? - I never thought about that. - Who can just give money away? - Well, I can't think. I mean, would you? If I was a billionaire and a random podcast was like, be cool to have 50 million, be like, "You know what, I'm gonna wire 'em." Bro, billionaires do dumb things all the time. - Yeah, but I'm saying like, is that something to do with you? - Bro, if you had, I don't even need to say a 100 billion. Let's say, if you had a billion dollars, in your bank account right now. And someone's just like, "Haha, give me 50 mil." You wouldn't be, there wouldn't be a party that's just like, "Oh, I can." I mean, yeah, you could, but I wouldn't give it to a random person, I don't think. - I mean, we're not random people. - To someone who has a billion dollars yet. - I mean, a lot of people that watch this show have a bit of a parasol for relationship with us. You don't know if like, there's some billionaire watching and it's just like, "I feel like I'm one of those guys." Now, let me go take a bath and in sheep's blood. - And wire them 50 mil. Listen, billionaires, I know what you're watching. It could be pretty cool if you did this. Like, cool kids do stuff like that. And I know you're trying to kind of fit in. I know that being a billionaire kind of removes you from society a bit, you're trying to fit in. We want you to fit in. I'm in this. - So like, just give us 20 mil each. Oh, we're down to 20 now. 2020, 20, 60. - I'll take 10, make it 50, I'm fine. - All right, how about this? How do you get nothing now? - Well, I'm trying to help. - Wow. - I'm the one that's talking to the billionaire right now. - You're right. - Like, isn't that a weird, like a joke's aside? Isn't that a weird concept that like, oh, by the way, we're all taking 5,000 per second, right? - Yeah, oh, yeah, I mean. - Honestly though, I wouldn't hate a million a day. - Snap answer, if it was just like, you need to answer in three seconds, I'd say a million a day. - I feel like it's cooler to say that. - It's definitely cooler to say 86 million a day. - $365 million a year. - That's cool. - That's insane. - That's pretty nuts. - Not gonna complain about it. - Ah, I don't think I will either. - But, let me ask a question. - Oh, okay. - Oh, here we go. I know what Joe is doing now because he loves to do this. - I'm joking. - Go, go, go. - Yeah, I was gonna say, you think money buys happiness? - I think it helps. I absolutely think it helps. I think that money brings along other issues that you would not understand, but you know, you can't anticipate, but in terms of like, what is a lot of people's source of woe? - Woe, it's cool, I think money helps a lot. - Yeah. - It might not be, it might be just like a shot. It might be like two years of happiness, not like a lifelong happiness. - Yeah. - I think the answer is yeah. You just think it's a yeah. - It's just yeah. - Why do you think people who have money say it doesn't? - Because they need to be more relatable to people. It's be like, it's so hard. You think all this money is so easy to have? - It's so, I'm just miserable as you. - 'Cause yeah, at the end of the day, money doesn't fix problems in here. - Really good point. - You know what I'm saying? - Yeah, it's a good point. - And everyone has this? - In your sweater? - That too. - Oh, it actually would probably do have that sort of. - It probably would fix problems in there. - The next sweater either. - Oh, thank you. - I appreciate that. - Where's that from? - Great question. - No, I do think that there is like, if you take a snapshot of an individual at that point in time, happiness is relative. It's based off of, you know, it's situational. If you take an individual and you give them a lot of money, they will become happier. But with that money comes a boatload of different issues and problems that they had not anticipated. And those will probably wear the other problems and shit that'll creep in. So I guess I'm, I know you hate that I do this. Like, it's like a yes and no, it depends. - I think, at the end of the day, you'd rather be broke with problems. You wouldn't rather be broke with problems than rich with problems, you know what I'm saying? - Yeah, but the problems, I mean, I imagine that like billionaire rich problems are like, fucking, whoa, dude. Like, more intense than, problems. - I doubt it. (laughing) - Like the casualness of your answer. - What do you think? - Yeah, I mean, I have a similar answer to you. I think that like, yes, of course. I just think that, you hear people say all the time, or so, I forgot who it was, but someone famous, like some celebrity said, like I wish people could, you know, have everything they ever wanted to know that, it might have been like Jim Carrier, some shit, so that they could know that like, it's not that it's meaningless or something. I don't know, that they're still unhappy or whatever the fuck, your answer to, I think that resonates of being like, I think that's why people say that. It's like, oh, I'm still I'm happy because of my relationships with my family and my friends and blah, blah, blah, but you also like, not having financial security is like a big one, dude. Like, yeah. - I think saying that money can't buy happiness, ignores that, and like, that's a massive one that everyone is dealing with. - Everyone wants? - Yeah, like you want financial security, and of course it's not gonna fix all of your problems, so if you don't have to think about your financial situation at all, I think naturally, you're going to think of what your issues are and try to plug those holes, so you'll notice that you still have issues that maybe some are deep-seated, so like, yeah, money can't technically fix those things, but you're in a better position. But even like, when you're saying like, you know, it doesn't fix this, access to more money definitely assists people with having the resources to seek out mental health professionals and stuff like that. So like, yeah, they might still not, like there might be some parts of them that they can't fix, but like, they now have access to resources that can definitely give them the tools to make those things feel better. - That's not exactly what I meant. I meant more like, if I have a thousand dollars and my grandma's a bitch, then if I have a billion, my grandma's still a bitch, you know what I mean? - Yeah, but the issue is that, at a thousand dollars, she's a bitch, at a billion dollars, she's a bitch and she won't leave you alone and she's asking for money. - Could be a bigger bitch. - Right, but now I have a billion dollars. - Yeah, but she could be a bitch, I don't care. - Yeah, in the other wing of my house. - Yeah, it's like she could be a bitch over there. - I mean, I seriously would love to know. (laughing) - I didn't want to say my mom, I feel like she'd see it. Then she'd be confused that I called her a bitch. - I mean, which of your grandmother's are still alive? - One of them, which one were you talking about though? - The one that's dead, I guess, because she wouldn't hear it, got it. - Well, technically, she's sitting right next to you right now. So, God is listening and Santa Claus. - And Santa, and other, other orbs, yes. - She wasn't, no, okay. - No, I do, I think that like, I would love to know where that saying like came from because I do think that'll probably tell us a lot about, 'cause people love to say that like, oh, money can't buy you happiness and it's like, when it came from someone that had the world at their fingertips and they're just trying to not sound like a pretentious douchebag. I do think that it's true, I do think that it's true if you want it to be true. Like, I think that like, I heard it quite one time, it was like, I may have been butchering, I may be butchering this, but it's like, happiness is what you have minus what you want. So like, on any sort of level, like what you have minus what you want, if you don't want anything, then you're pretty content. Or if you like, there are things that you want and if you're just a person who needs billions of dollars in order to, like, that's the thing that you're after, like, obviously that's a very difficult thing to do. So that person hypothetically would be more miserable than we are. - Sure. - If it's like, I'm never gonna be done and this is what I have to be in a state of stress and I never take time for myself or whatever, Maybe that's why people are saying certain things like that. I don't know, but I think it's a stupid thing to say publicly too. I also like an audience. Yeah, it also because, and again, this is, I know this is the nitpicky person in me breaking this down, but like it also is entirely dependent on how a person defines happiness. So like if a happy, if there are people and I'm, I'm like this to a degree, I'm not afraid to admit it, that like happiness is tied to a bit of like materialistic stuff. You know, so if that stuff does make people happier than, yeah, money will bring happiness. But also if happiness is not in that, it isn't. So to say like money doesn't buy you happiness, and it's like, well, I do think that you technically they can. There's so much nuance to that obviously, but I do think that like people think that they, if they had a bigger house, it would be better and it would. But eventually I think that you get to sensitize to your position no matter what. And then it's like you, because if you move into the neighborhood where everyone's got big houses, I think that you adapt to that environment and then you're like comparing yourselves to these people, you know, like if you are in the MBA and you're making $7 million a year, it's like, I'm fucking chilling. But around you, these people are making 50, 60, what a year. So you're kind of like, oh, I'm actually at the bottom of the toe and pull here. So I feel like and then you get caught up in that like race. Like I said, that's why it's like the, what you just said, I agree with where you're saying, it depends how you define that, which is why I was saying it's like what you have versus what you want. And if you, and that's why I also started this by saying like, what is your number of like enough, essentially, not that these two things are completely tied. It wasn't like a fucking thing I planned on doing. But once you get past a certain point, it's like, oh, I'm fine with being content here. And I'm happy to, you know, kind of do this. Like some people just need constantly, like they try to fill their problems with material things. So like, I'm going to buy a car, I'm going to buy a house, I'm going to buy clothes, designer stuff, watches, blah, blah, blah. And then eventually it's just a watch. And like you're cool. You like the watch. It's cool. But you become, become desensitized the fact that I've owned this watch for five years. But the thing that I was trying to fix by buying a watch is going to be there. So I'll just buy another watch or I'll just buy a, you know, you're like, you can't fix your problems with things. Yeah. But like I said before, with that money also does come more access to, yeah, if you're responsible with mental health, mental health services and stuff like that can in a way, yeah, fix those, which is very helpful and is also kind of like an inherent flaw in that whole, you know, system. But like, if you have more money, you can do the things that make you happy and you can fix the things that make you unhappy. So okay, so we're saying it can't fix every problem. Yeah. Dog. Okay. Right. So what percentage of problems do you think it could fix? Let's just give it a number. I'm going to say like 85, 85, oh my, you take that every day of the week. Don't you? Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Okay. Bro, if someone came to me and said like, yo, you're going to have a billion dollars. But you can live with 15%. You can live with like 15% of your life being problematic. Yeah. You can look at that. I mean, duh. Yeah. Duh. Of course. I don't like, I hate the mentality though, I'm just like, like why ask for a billion? Like, you'd be good with like 500 million and it's just like, because you're asking me to ask for a billion dollars, I don't want to do it. What's the different thing? But you're asking me to ask where this started is like, there could be billionaires at see our clips and watch our show. And you don't know, dude, it like, that's not, is that not nuts? Like that's what the fucking, that's what's so crazy about the internet. Like bro, we could just be sitting here talking about the weight of our dicks and like, there could be a billionaires like sitting there with a mother of pearl spoon eating caviar on a yacht in the Bahamas and they're just like, these guys are funny. They're not in the Bahamas. I'm going to like this. Not in the Bahamas. Yeah. I mean, those are, those are, those are men and women that, they lived with the mentality of trying to do things well. And look where it got them. If you're going to do things, do it well. I think so. Oh my god, you're so right, Frank. I'm so glad you came up with that. We do have some more sponsors for today, speaking of money. This one is, what is this? We got skims, skims makes underwear and it used to be just for women. Now it's for men too. You can shop underwear for men and women at skims.com. They have a five inch boxer brief that is lovely, okay? I have a couple of pairs of skims. They sent them to us and they're very comfortable. I like them a lot. I know the Frank likes them too. You know, it's a, it's a good, I actually got my secret Santa, some skims because they ask for underwear. Ooh, big skims holiday season. We're saying to ask your, your boy for, but big what it is, big skims holiday season. So shop the best underwear for men and women at skims.com. Let them know we sent you after you place the order, select podcasts in the survey and select our show in the drop down menu that follows, okay? And lastly here, we have rocket money, rocket money is an all in one personal finance app that is going to put money back in your pocket by canceling your unwanted subscriptions, monitoring your spending and help you lower your bills if you can grow your savings, okay? And if you have people sign up for free trials or they're paying for some online magazine or whatever, some recurring service and maybe they're not using it or the free trial ran out and now they're paying for it and they're not aware. A lot of people are irresponsible in that way, myself included. So rocket money helps you organize all of your stuff into one area that you can look at and say, oh, this is what I'm spending my money on. I'm going to cancel this, cancel this. And if it's $10 a month, that's $120 a year, so you're putting that money back in and that's just one thing. So you can cancel some stuff and save some money. Also, like I said, monetize your spending, go help you budget and it can help you lower your bills as well. So it's all about helping you reach your financial goes faster and you can join at rockamoney.com/basement. That is rocketmoney.com/basement. So yeah, go put that money back in your pocket folks, rockamoney.com/basement, enjoy that. How are we transitioned from, like where did we even start this episode? Euro guy. I have Euro Frank, destroyler and drag names. Stirlers is the cutest game in the world. It's so fun. I obviously was joking. I knew you wouldn't make fun of it, but like, you never know. No, I knew that one pretty well. I hope. I was hoping the name gave me an opening that I could just rip it to shreds. Is it real? We a lot of dumpster to shreds. Oh, my God. You want a dumpster? What? You a lot of dumpster. Oh, my God. People still, like, at our shows last year, people were showing up still talking about Mystique the Greek and Starla. Like, they were very popular and that was years ago at this point. Oh, my God, dude. That was a long time ago. That was almost three years ago. Good God. You know, they were a big part. Maybe we bring them back sometime this year. Good. I mean, they beat the shit out of our face. I'll tell you that. They did. I couldn't get eyeliner off my eyes for days. Yeah. My fucking eyelashes work. My eyebrows were glued to my head. And you were a bearded queen. I was. I was a fully shaved. What were you going to say? Not fully, like facial shaved. Yeah. Oh, you shaved his pubes just in case. But they a bearded queen. That is a term. That is a term. I don't know. And then we learned that drag kings is a term, remember? I did see a clip of it recently and I was like, "Damn dude, like, that's like professional looking makeup." Well, we had a professional makeup artist come, like a drag makeup artist coming in. I feel like that took longer than the Halloween shit. Yeah, because the Halloween, they painted our face and just put prosthetics on top of it. Yeah. And this one's like, from the, like, everything though. Yeah. It was intense. And also, like, very tight, yeah, it's tight. Everything was tight. You're like this. It pulls you. And your hair was, remember, we had to take the wigs off because they were so tight. Yeah. It was intense. Did they give you boobs? No tits. Yeah. I mean, I don't, I don't remember. I don't remember. I don't remember if they gave you boobs. I'll tell you what. We do drag again. We're getting a third. Oh, yeah. Definitely getting a third. Oh, yeah. You'd be good, dude. I'm, I do everything I do well. See, I don't like that this is becoming a joke. It's not a joke. I don't like, I tried to express myself, I gave, I, and I, and I, I'm being heartfelt. I, like, you guys are killing it. You know, if that unlocks this every time, sure. What? If every time I say, well, he flowers, I'm down. I just, it feels like you got, like, I'm the butt of some joke now. And I don't like it. Frank, you're telling the joke. I'm not telling a joke. That every time I start talking, you start snickering over there. And you're winking right now. You bastard. Put the camera on him. I'm winking. Winking. I'm not winking. Josh. He's been so pensive. This is ant thinking. Yeah. Oh. Mmm. What was your drag name again? The venomous Viper Vesper Vinoma Vinoma Vesper Vinoma Vesper Vesper Vinoma Vesper That's a sexy. What's from those names back again? I kind of want to follow that. I kind of want to do that. I want a new one. I want another one. Yeah, all right. Joey, go page in, Queen Joe. What's random first and last? I don't know. You go to that. It'll probably just be random random random. Give me, give me, give me. Dolly Swanson. Dolly Swanson. Dolly Swanson. That's kind of a sec, dude. It's kind of dope. Sounds like what movie that reminds me of. Dolly Swanson-Eek. Oh, Dumb and Dumber. Yeah. Samsonite. Samsonite? I was way off. That's not a bad one, Ann. Do one for you, mate. Do another horror one. Oh, do you like to be a spooky? Silly Slater? That's good. No way. That's the best one. How do you get that, and I get like, mischits a lot. Or something like that. That's fucking insane. Doris Ballsaxx. Yeah, give me, give me stupid. Okay. Here we go. Zamboni Thong. That's kind of like that. That's kind of not bad. Zamboni Thong. But the Zamboni seems like a last name. Yeah. Yo. Speaking of Thong. Thong song. Heard it recently. Still a banger. Let me guess where you heard it. In your car, and you put it on. I was at the gym, and I put it on. Yeah, you're at the gym lifting. You really need to hear. I mean, no, no, no, no, I go through, like, I have different songs that come on every now and then. And I was just thinking like, damn, Thong song would hit right now. And fucking, let me tell you. Baby. That thong, thong, thong, thong, thong. Like, yo, yeah, now you see it like the end of the song, though. Also, it's crazy how, like, operatic he gets at the end, about thong. It's thongs. Which I wish I loved anything as much as Cisco apparently loved thongs in the year of our Lord 1999. Yeah, that's hell of a time. Do you try to time, like, reps with parts of songs? Yes, yes, yes, that's why I listen to, like, upbeat music. Yeah, you know, because it's like, ooh, ooh, ooh. Oh, I meant, like, like the climax of the song, you're like, I don't think I've ever described a song as having a climax. Well, you know, like, the big moment, the crescendo. Yeah, the crescendo. As we call it in the music biz. That is the right term, for sure. I definitely, like, depending on, like, if I'm doing squats, I try to do, like, the most intense song, you know, like, really, like, rising, like, yeah. Because if it's just like a, like, I've been listening to a lot of Billy Joel, as I told you. And one of the songs that comes on in my playlist is "Alentown." Oh, we're living here in Alentown. That's not on my squats playlist. I can't have that. Because you need a little pop buzzing band, you know? Like, Vienna can't-- like, it's a great song. Great song. You can't do it during, like, squats. No, I could be deadlift and doing that. But then, you put on scenes from an Italian restaurant, you know? Things are OK with me these days. Got a new dog in it. Got a new wife. Got a new life in the family is fine. Oh, yeah. Like, you see what I'm talking about? That's a good one. Like, it just-- it needs to be a little more. Get me going. Get me going. Have you added or taken away things from your gym playlist? I just let Spotify DJ run that shit. Yeah. I skip sometimes, and he gets tight. I skip, and he's like, skip, skip, skip. I'm like, all right, relax. Damn, they're yelling at you. Literally, he goes, skip, skip, skip. Here's your next put-- I'm like, really? Fucking play the song. So it's an artificial, intelligent, artificially intelligent DJ who's making fun of you. Apparently, it's a real guy. Like, it's his voice that, like, they used AI to, like, say a bunch of stuff. And then, they curate based off of your music taste. So, like, things I've searched, or songs I've been listening to recently, or songs that were popular with me in 2022, something like that. So, they'll play songs like that. And then, they'll mix in, like, shit that I haven't listened to. Oh, my god. Love you. But you're, like, running a workout music is probably miserable. It's like, it's like-- My running play-- Winy white men sing into a bingo hall, and, like, that's their form of happiness. You know, my running playlist is like that. My-- no, my-- I'm lately at the gym. Like, it's pretty strictly 50 set in camera. Oh, hell yeah. Oh, that's it. Hell yeah. That's all-- But, like, when I'm running, I'm trying to keep my heart rate low, so I try to put on slower shit. I listened to the-- what's it called the other day, the-- I forgot the actual name of the song, but the-- there it go by Joel Santana the other day at the gym. Yeah. I don't sing that one at the gym. So, also, my gym is mostly, like, 98-year-old men, so they'd probably be, like, pumped if I was whistling at them. Yeah. But, that shit gets you going. Some of the old, like, old-- Oh, this is shit. Early 2000's hip hop is the fucking best. Welcome back, Joe. Welcome back. Early 2000's-- I agree, though. Like, just the old camera in 50 songs. Or I listen to some diplomats shit, too. But I used to not do that. Like, there are times, like, back in the day. I would just rip, like, very poppy music. I could see you listening to Celine Dionne at the gym. On my running playlist. Really? Bro, what's the song? ♪ They were nice and we were so cool ♪ What song is that? Oh, it's all coming back to me. That's on my running playlist, and I'm telling you right now. But that does have a bit of a punch to it. It does. ♪ And it's all coming back to me, Joe ♪ Start taking on it. Like, I could see Kree doing a cover of that. Yeah. I could. I could see it. Do me a favor. That's your begging for it. Run to Kree. And tell me it's not going to be the best run of your life. I'm sure that would be, too. Like, those are some good running songs. I need songs that feel like I'm watching myself run in a movie, you know what I'm saying? Like, if you see people running and like an inspiring, motivating part of a movie, and you're like, what songs playing there? That's the songs that I listen to. Do you run-- or not you, but like, do you think people run to like classical music, like fucking Beethoven? And like, God, I'd hope not. I mean, I would kind of-- some of it would be sick. ♪ Dun, dun, dun, dun ♪ I mean, you're just running to Beethoven's fifth or ninth, whatever it's like. I don't think he had a ninth. I don't even know. Isn't there like a thing? I'm not saying that I know this. This is good. Isn't there a thing that like, there's like a superstition that after a certain symphony, the composer dies. Oh, I'm not familiar. You know what I'm talking about. That's too deep for me. Really? Yeah. It's like no one gets past their eighth symphony, 'cause they don't even know what a symphony. No one writes a sym-- I think it's just like a song. I feel like we haven't said the word correctly on the first try. Symphony. Symphony. Symphony. Symphony. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know what I do like to do when I get home. Not all the time, but sometimes I like to throw on, like, Louie Armstrong or-- Woo! Hell yeah. You know what I mean? Just to make it feel like, oh, what is this? Like an old flapper's club? Yeah. Spark up a cigarette at my own home. You know what's a good one to throw on? We have a vinyl Ray Charles. Ray Charles. Hell yeah. Hell if it's Gerald, I have one of her. We got some Aretha Franklin's. Aretha Franklin's goes on there. Who's the one-- who's Penny's from Heaven? Why can't I think of her name? [SINGING] Is that Paul Anka? No. Paul Anka. Well, he's looking that up. It seems that for composers, the curse of the 9th, it's more like the 27th club now. You know, some people make it past, but a lot of them on the 9th Symphony have passed. A lot of them. That's weird. Yeah, dude. Yeah, the 27th club. That was a freaky one. I'm-- oh my god, dude. I remember being in middle school. Like, don't carry around a white lighter. The curse of the 27 is going to get you. Because it was all those famous musicians that died at 27 had a white lighter on them when they passed away. Oh, I don't know if it's true. Billy Holiday was who I was thinking of, by the way. That was a cover, I guess. But yeah, all of them had a white lighter in their pocket. It's like, so you didn't carry a white lighter? I didn't carry lighters. Meaning that I never-- Because I didn't smoke. But it would be like, if someone had one, I'd be like, don't get put it down. And then I'd do the thing where I'd take it and I'd pop it by hitting it on the ground. Nice. You remember those? Hell yeah. It's sick. Or you make crackhead lighters. Crackheads are just getting an absolute stray out of nowhere. Yeah, it did live along. Well, he was crackheads alone. They were already cracked up. Well, they need higher flames. Oh, so you know what a crackhead lighter is? Yeah, of course. I offer courses. Like, you grew up in Masbeth. I forget that that's Queens. That's fair. Masbeth. Is it Masbeth? Nope. [LAUGHTER] You didn't grow up in Masbeth? That's close. Middle village. Well, there we go. What do you tell the address as well? I mean, we know where we-- I said, you grew up there. No, I'm not saying where you live, man. I said, yeah. No, you live three blocks down the way. Yeah, Middle Village. Fifth tree. Green door. Yep. All right. Yeah. I mean people unlocked, like, do they still. - Look for the house with the flooded basement. - Look for the house with the twisted T-bottles in the window. - And people screaming at Mario Kart. - For that, yeah. - If you're very quiet, you'll be able to hear them somehow. - Oh, you're just gonna hear, "Ugh!" - Yeah. - Listen for the gag. - I did that just for the story. I didn't do that to try to gag bait you. - I did see you, by the way, your Melort calendar for the 25th day you didn't gag, right? - I did not. - Two days. - Two days you didn't gag. - Wait, what was the other one? 14th? - Day 14 or 15. - You didn't gag? - Don't remember that day either. - Yeah, you said you'd blacked out that day. - Yeah. - Did you? - I came home from the bar, I forgot to do it. - I don't think I've ever seen you drunk. I don't get drunk. - Oh, clearly you do. - I get, no, I'm saying I get drunk. I hit a point and I don't go past that. I kind of just fall asleep. Like my body shuts down. - That's how I am. - Yeah. - I mean, that's how I was. I couldn't even tell you the last time I was drunk. - If I'm on Red Bull Vocca's, oh, you'll see me. I'll start being, you'll see me. - You'll see me. - Red Bull Vocca's, you'll know me. - 'Cause it keeps up the sleep person awake. - Interesting. - Okay. - Does that make sense? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - If you could make, I know your answer is going to be, but like, if you could have one drink all night. - This is gonna be like, Jameson, Ginger, Jameson, Seltzer, the slice of orange. - One drink all night, it's pretty close. I mean, I can't say like wine, right? You could say whatever you want. - Yeah. - Oh, I thought you were talking about America. - It's America, baby. - Oh, I would say wine, then. - All right. - Oh, would you be? - I think I cocktail, I would. Yours is probably Miller light. - I mean, I like light beer. I'm definitely getting to a point in my life. I mean, I'll tell you right now, I'll fucking, you can cream me up all night. I'll take a Guinness all night, dude. - That's a good answer, too. - Actually, I like, I had three corona lights the other day, and then I was bombed. I was like, what happened? What's going on? - Do you remember the introduction of bud platnums? - I do. - Wait, is it corona light like that? Or is it lighter? - No, I think I just, I'm not used to beer, and I had, and I had three in a row, and I was just, I felt like, whoa. - Yo, probably the worst hot in my life I've ever blacked out. I had a bottle of cheap champagne and a six pack of bud platnums. (laughing) I was on another planet, dude. I couldn't fucking believe how drunk I was. - 1% is bud platnum. I think it's like, not super high, but compared to Bud Light. - Yeah, it's high. - I think it's like 10%, 10%. - Whoa, maybe eight, maybe eight, maybe eight, maybe eight. - Eight's even high, too. Can you look at a bud light platnum? - Six, six. But that's still, it's like, that's higher than a normal beer, which, but coupled with, like, bottom shelf, it was Andre, champagne, no disrespect to Andre, but, dude, there's a place over here, and me and Nicole went to branch there, and we were like, oh yeah, we'll like do them a mosa. And she's like, do you want to just get a craft? She's, and so I'm thinking like, oh, 'cause usually when people are doing that, it's like, oh, you get more money's worth if you just get, like, another two, instead of ordering four separately, if you're gonna have more than one. So that was what I was thinking. I was like, oh, all right, sure. And she comes over with a craft, opens a bottle and pours the whole thing in. And I'm like, whoa. I was like, we don't want to drink a bottle of champagne. - I feel like, I don't think a bottle of champagne is that much. - It's not that crazy. It just wasn't in the cards at the moment. - I was like, half bottle of champagne. - I was like, we're having like a nice little brunch, and it was like, comes over with a bottle of champagne. I was like, I thought it was gonna be like, one extra glass, and you know what I'm saying? - I am a problem at a, at a, at a bottomless brunch. Yeah, I am a fucking problem. - Especially when it's, when it's timed, I mean, you're creating kind of-- - Yeah, when it's like, yo, you have, you have a two hour bottomless brunch? I'd be like, don't move. The first time I ever, I don't know if it was the first time, but one of the first times I ever went to one, it was like myself, Davino, Danny, and I'm sure there was like one or two other people there. Yo, we legitimately had the server just standing next to the table and like would refill his cup, I would drink mine, and they sit, they stay there for like eight minutes. Like, they just didn't leave the table. Davino, he like threw up in the bathroom. I think I broke a glass on the floor accidentally. I offered him to buy it. That's why my sister was there, 'cause I felt bad, 'cause I broke the glass, I was like, I'll buy the glass. And they were like, we don't give a fuck about the glass. We don't know what it costs. I don't work but I felt so bad. I was just like, I'll buy it. Yeah, you know, I'm an orange. Good times. Have you ever had an Irish coffee? I don't like coffee. Oh yeah, that's right. Have you? That's not really an aunt thing. Is Bud Light in a coffee? Does that count? Bud Light in a coffee? No. I've had hot toddies, like maybe once. Like, oh hot toddy. Have you had an Irish coffee? No, I was just thinking about the other day, 'cause like it came up like, or I was at a bar. It was a bar near me that has like great dinner. So we went for dinner. But the person who was sitting next to me ordered a hot toddy. And I was like, I don't know if I'd like hot drinks. Uh, I like. The one or two times I've had them, I like them. But you're right. I feel like it feels wrong. Yeah, what are we doing here? Like it definitely feels wrong. That's like, mold wine? Yeah. I think I did coffee, Jameson, and Bailey's once. That's pretty good. So then you basically have that. Yeah, so it was pretty good. I was just trying to, he jogged my memory a little bit. Yeah. That's pretty good. That's pretty tasty. Yeah, I mean, if I was a coffee drinker, I could see that being a pretty appealing thing. I do like watching videos of people making Irish coffees. You ever see the guys making like 40 of them in a row? No, I wanted somehow at the end of my, before the end of my life, do the thing where they hold up like 12 shakers and they like pour it out. Pour all the fucking drinks, and they're like rainbow colored. Oh, they're all different colors. Yeah, I should have so sick, dude. Yeah, that is cool. Do you remember when we did skittles shots? Were those colored? Yes, they were. So at a bar. Oh, I didn't do them at a bar. I made them at home. I bought-- oh, I thought you made me do on a dip with my station once. We probably did. I did a lot of drinking of alcohol at dip my station. The greatest bar that has died, that bar was great. That bar was fucking great. We were 21. So every bar was great. I mean, 21. Do you remember it? Six times. Oh, that's what you were doing. Oh, I'm saying. No, that's where we used to go when we were-- No, but I made the skittles shots. And I thought of them as like, oh, it's like a mixed drink. And I had like a cup of it. And I was like, oh, this is just a cup of straight vodka. It was disgusting. But it was like, it tasted like skittles. I'll say that. You guys made skittles. No, but I do rainbow shots. I could do the pouring and-- Really? You can do that? It's different colors. I did it twice. They all do that. We could do it. It's just different. Yeah, you just layer it. It's alcohols, right? No, not really. Towards the top, it's just mixers. Oh. The first one's grenadine and orange juice, essentially. In college, it was a big thing that people would do the gummy bears or gummy worms. Where they would just soak gummy bears or gummy worms in vodka, and then you just eat the gummy bears. And are you Jell-O-shot, guys? I like a Jell-O-shot, but it's a little too much work for me to get drunk. I've had a Jell-O-shot in my day. That could mean a thousand. That's what I mean. This is the answers we get from him. I've consumed one before. Do you like them? There's been hundreds. Yeah, I like them. Yeah. It doesn't feel like you're taking shots. It's a little overtly sexual just to get drunk. I don't want to have to-- I have to procke out of this thing. I don't want to have to perform a sexual act to have a drink. That's the worst part about Jell-O-shot. Is that you get them? And it's like, I'm sucking the fuck out of this thing. Yeah, I'm fucking crazy. Yeah, that was crazy. The trick is to make them upside down. What? The trick is to make them-- When you make them, upside down. Here's a better trick. I've never made them, and I'm not gonna. I think I've made them once before. I remember as a kid, we always hosted new years parties. I remember my mom and my family used to make trays of these bastards. I do remember that, too. And honestly, it might make some. You should. The fact that we're still going, we're done. You did it well, Frank. The audio only-- you can say losers. You can say the audio only listeners. The audio only listeners. They're probably like, what happened here? I think they can hear you. They just like doing something, yeah. Well, you know what? Have a Jell-O-shot this year. Have a Jell-O-shot for the new year. I mean, this is coming out well after the new year, you know. But like-- I'm talking to you, you guys. Oh. Have a Jell-O-shot. Should we make some? Me? Oh, I'm not going to see you before a new year. No. We could do a Jell-O-shot power hour. No, we cannot die. That wouldn't-- I wouldn't be able to fucking walk from this. Bro, I don't know that I could eat 60 Jell-O's in an hour. That's insane. That is a lot of Jell-O, dude. It's a lot of Jell-O. I was like, imagine throwing up Jell-O. Do you remember power hour? I know them. Too wide. I would like it. That's such a fucking, like, yo, it would be like, oh, there would be like YouTube playlist of like early 2000s hip-hop power hour and every different song it was that shit. Bro, we used to sit there with shot glasses of beer, like psychopaths. - I remember. - Damn, did we do one on Patreon? - I think we did years ago. - I think we did one. - I think we did one years ago. I don't think we've done one recently. - I still didn't mean time it. - Oh, we just had a timer ago. - Probably, yeah. - I still think you should do one with pizza rolls. - Ooh, I can easily do that. - You think so? - Between the two of us, we could do a Pigs and a Blanket one. - No, that's a lot. - 60 Pigs and a Blanket between the two of us, 38. - Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, what? Without trying. - I think we can. - Power half hour? - Power half hour. - I mean, why? - Because you're both taking one. - No, he does one, I do one. - Oh, every two minutes you take one? - Yeah. - Damn, come on. - All right, we can do it. - Easily. - Let's see, we got it all up in here. I could do it by myself, I don't think so. - What if there was $3,000 on the line? - Oh, well, hold on a sec. I didn't know money was-- - I can very easily do that. - If money was, I knew money was involved. - Well, it's still late 'cause he offered me first and you saw that. (laughing) Is it a challenge? I'll do it. - No, I said, what if? - What ifs turned into maybes? And then maybe, turn into yeses? - That's crazy. - Then maybe he's turned into yeses. - No. - Just could love is a challenge. You kidding me? - I know, it's a sin. It's a hard for money. He'll do it for nothing. We got to find something good and he'll do it. - I just don't even tell yaak. I mean, I pray we have never had someone throw up on this show. - We haven't. - We've gotten close. - Yeah, let's see. - I thought you were gonna throw up once. - There were a couple times. Oh, maybe when you shoved your hand on your throat. - That's what it's gonna say. - I was like, what? - Yeah, that one will do. - There are some times. We could do like, you know, it would be miserable if it was like our least favorite foods and there was like 10 versions of them for a power hour. So like, if yours was just like pickles and, what else does he hate? - There was just 10 versions of pickles. Wouldn't that be? - I mean, you really hate pickles that much? - Yeah, it's not good. - Pickles, mallort. - Jeez, that's a good one. - For sure, forget it. - Pickles soaked in mallort. - Oh, that's a disgusting thought. - I think I would probably taste pretty good. - Pickleback, but instead of whiskey, it's mallort. - Oh man, that's a bad part. - You're double gag. - That's a bad part. - Maybe double gag, double. - There you go. - Uh-huh. - Yep. - All right, that's for those audio losers. (laughing) - Or audio only losers. - But yeah, well, this is our last episode before we're going into the new year. But it is new years now. I mean, we're in the mid-December. - Mid-January, at the moment. - Where are you at this point? You just fucking show the people your sausage at this point in time. - I'm not gonna do that. But showing the people how the sausage is made. That's the reference. - Yeah. - I don't think you would show people your cock. (laughing) - Thank you for laying all that out. - I wanna make sure I say that very clearly, because everything else I'm saying this episode is being taken out of context. I'm coming to put up a joke 'cause I'm trying to better myself. And how are you gonna better yourself again? - I'm not doing this. - All right, Ant, never mind. Frank, we're gonna punch it. (laughing) The Frank Hover is all over Patreon.com/thebasementyard. TBYTORMERCH, thank you. We love you. I hope that the holidays treated everyone safe. If you celebrated any of those holidays. Ant, you can find them. - Just kidding, who you're saying me. (laughing) You guys can follow me at the Joe San Diego Go follow show at The Basementyard. And that is all. See you guys next time. - Wait, at the Joe San Diego I would change. - Should I say that? - Yep. - Well, don't follow that account. We don't know who it is.