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#536 - Baiting The Jonas Brothers

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#536 - Baiting The Jonas Brothers

The conversation is a humorous, self-deprecating, and often absurd exchange centered around the host’s exaggerated self-confidence in sword-fighting and storytelling. He shares a funny anecdote about a direct DM to Joe Jonas on TikTok, which he later regrets, illustrating a contrast with the more playful, approachable nature of the Jonas brothers. The discussion then veers into creative territory, with the host jokingly proposing a book about his life, including childhood memories and a YouTube journey. A major theme is the idea of adopting a fun, non-aggressive approach to engaging with pop culture icons like the Jonas brothers, emphasizing relatability over boldness. The dialogue includes surreal debates about the sameness of books and cakes, highlighting a shared love for absurd humor. Throughout, the host promotes various sponsors, from mental health services to mattresses and meal kits, all while maintaining a casual, unfiltered tone. The conversation ends with a playful, chaotic discussion about ham juice, which leads to a comedic call to his mother for clarification, underscoring the show’s blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and banter. The overall tone is lighthearted, self-aware, and filled with jokes about trivialities, making it both entertaining and authentic.

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English
Welcome back to the Welcome back to the Frank's got a new toy Let's see it again Oh, you got some sparks there too Look at that look don't ask me where this is from by the way that the famous company KLX CW what is that you're still holding it you still hold you've defeated the purpose you got to do it again You fucked up. I didn't fuck anything up. I haven't actually said why the hell is yours so big in my And also your sword's not on I'm just playing you're shit is smoking brother Wait, wait, you're smoking I don't know you have a cooler one You have a big one too He's got the biggest one. What the hell is that it doesn't matter though because I got the skills Yeah Yeah, oh hall be honest for a fucking split second. I'd be honest really wait before you 33 33 29 28 but he still fucks it up. He still fucks it up That's a problem. I'm speaking of fucking up. Can you give me me that please? I can can you get that for me please, baby I should have still smoking and now I'm scared. I think it's supposed to smoke it looks like it has a smoke hole Oh, yeah, your shit is oh look at him. That was a crazy way to get down there brother Everyone in the smoke hole. I think we all got a smoke hole. Let me go back to a cool color. Ooh red Yeah, yeah, I really Be fucking honest. You've never thought that you had the skill of sword fighting Um, I really think I could be a good sword fighter. Maybe when I was six I feel like I did I was really into ninjas like yo You know what after this after the cameras go off. Let's do an actual sword fight Like with those swords with these yeah, I mean they're they're hard plastic. They will break but like If someone came at me You know someone came at me Yeah, that's pretty fucking good I remember do you remember Keith what we were this is getting annoying. Well, no, I know We're Keith like held up a cleaver from my mom's kitchen And I was like you supposed to hold it like this supposed to hold it like this like he's fucking yeah, I'm like ninja What are you doing Keith? Keith said that the most dangerous way to get someone with a knife was like that Brother that way. I feel like a stab is probably I feel like rough I do think and this is based off of Nothing not one thing. I would be a good sword fighter. Right Because it just seems like something you need a lot of skills. What do you think you'd be bad at? Um Writing a book Okay, you asked a real question. Yeah, I did you asked a real question and you got a real one. You don't think you have anything interesting to say Is that even about saying something you want to know something actually and I don't but when we were at the after party after msg So it came up to me and they're like I Sorry, I just tried to put it back in while you were talking quietly It is just not going in. Keep them separate. Hold on Clearly there's some friction going on. Got it But there was someone who came up to me. They're like we work at W and Mars and we W Mars We work at William Mars and we work in the book and we want you to write a book with our hands with the frog that CW Um, no, but she was like you guys if you guys ever want to feel like writing a book I was like whoa. Are you at the right place? I think it's only a matter of time for you to write a book. What am I writing it about? I think you'll definitely and come on and and look at me and and come on get me here and and it'd be one of the few books I've read you'd read my book. I'd read it. What do you think it would be about? Well I don't know you Me yeah, I couldn't I could imagine the chapters would be titled like you know Young Irish boy chapter one right no, so this is why you wouldn't be going That's your young Irish boy if you write a book and I write the forward I know Greg is already written books and he's he's obviously very good at it. He's gonna ask Greg first I imagine he'll ask but Greg will write something like you know like When we think of icons of today's society like he'll write something actually good. I'll write something better Like in a sense of fun from the basement to Irish boy. It would be like chapter one. It'd be something about F1 It would be that I'm sure well chapter like chapter one through five will be about like your childhood You're upbringing and everything and then like chapter six will be like to start a YouTube It'll be called like how to be a salat right or like holes right Also am I writing the book now because you just said chapters one through six Well chapters one through five would be about your life uh-huh, you know your chapter one. This is classic You know, am I wrong here? I know books. I mean you just said that you wouldn't be able to do it Now you're doing it. No, I would be able to write it. I would be able to like produce it Produced that is what's a book producer called publisher yeah, like for an editor maybe I don't know editor might be the thing I would be able to edit your book from like a Break it up like this type of way got it. Which is just like my swords fighting abilities based off of nothing Also a big moment in my life Well interacted with Joe Jonas on tiktok. Oh, yeah, there's a little bit more to that story that people don't know actually So I had my secret Santa party so I was drunk having it and I also was earlier that day at a at a rangers game So they were they were drinks made had and made Because I had them after they were made But I go on my tiktok and someone tagged me in something so I saw it and it was Joe Jonas and he was using one of our audios from the show So I was like oh, that's crazy. So I commented like are we gonna hang out or whatever I was driving care at this point So then I like go back to my tiktok like an hour later or something and he replies yes and follows me What is my reaction mind you I had just said I came from the ranger game where they were flowing the drinks well You were drunk. So he followed so you obviously you had to send a DM He followed me. I immediately DMed him my phone number and nothing else That's a lot of forward guy. That is very forward If you're watching this that's on me super aggressive. Which your phone number by the way, which is right But I did do that like he immediately followed me. I mean, I was like bang. No, what's on hold on? You are you took an approach shooting you suck to it bang You don't need a sword for this shot that you're shooting over here, baby You went and you knew the right way to be about it was direct because I'm sure these big Hollywood types people play games with them You know these big Hollywood types people play games with them and they're like man. I would love to Get our people to get us together, you know, and it's just like not fuck that. I'm Joe Jonas. I'm Joe Sanogato Text me. I literally just sent my phone number and then the next morning I remembered that I did that so I went back to the DM and I was like that was aggressive was it Like he obviously didn't text you no and I also but I did I I say my second message him was That was aggressive And then like that was it but and I don't even know if he's read it. I don't have it. Okay. Well, there's been no contact But there will be I mean, can you imagine you get it Texas? Like, yeah, it's up. It's Joe Jonas That'd be so funny actually would text him back and be like All right now crazier than me. Yeah, you're now you're no me. Yeah Now you're a little crazy. I mean the Jonas brothers are are in there You know, they're a new era very playful era where they're just kind of getting after it on social media They're on tour the jobo, you know, so I think it would make sense if they're doubling down on it being relatable fun guys Yeah, you know, I think if we're being honest. I probably have more in line and and and more What's the word I'm looking for here in common with the Jonas brothers than you. Oh, I mean, you're you were not a Disney kid grown up What I used to watch a Disney channel like it was going on a style. How do you know that I didn't do that? Did you watch camprock? No, there we go. That's how I know I at one point had a haircut more similar to the Jonas brothers than you did Mm-hmm. Yeah, I could sing my ass off. Did any of it? Well, no Nick buzzed his head once when when he was older and when you buzzed your head ironic I think not that'll be a chapter in your book Yeah, I don't think the Jonas brothers ever wore double breasted button up shirts for Easter Well, the thing is I'm a visionary I also I also wore a belt that day there. I mean You pull a picture up. I I don't I can't like access it immediately But there is a photo of me that I think my mom took Double-brested white t-shirt tucked into a pair of jeans and I'm wearing a belt that looks like Santa Claus would wear Yeah, it was like a big black And it was just like a square and I'm like what the fuck am I you were a visionary. All right. Yeah, you know, I should have been Visioning myself down the barrel of a gun Too much too crazy much a lot of much man. I'm shooting. I mean Joe Jonas. We're trying to get Joe Jonas on here Not that kind of talk that's gonna get the Joe bros to come hang out with us Hey, I mean come on listen. Yeah, all right. So what could we do? To make our show more Jonas brothers safe and fun Safe yeah because they don't think we're not safe We're pretty safe, but I'm saying like we got to remember we got to remember these are the Joe bros You know these are the I would I'll tell you right now. I'll ask a lot about the the promise rings Yeah, I'm asking a ton about the problem. Oh, come on. Those are for show those are I think they outright said like those were for show I think you really mountain he was like yeah, I think like any of those were bail. Who's that? Who's voices that? Who was that by the way? I was Nick Jonas. That was Nick Jonas. I think so do his voice again. I Don't think I can redo it. Oh, I think you're right. All right. You give me ask me a question as an interviewer I'll be Nick Jonas. So you see that you guys are wearing promise rings. What's that about? Yeah, I mean I wait like none of the like promise ring real And and I and listen Nick that was him now. Well, well you Yeah, decided to be too forward with Joe Jonas, which I would never do Joe by the way. That's I took a shot and It is what it is Shoot for the clouds laying amongst the stars. Is that what they say? No, it's the opposite okay Whatever or you shoot for the sun shoot for the moon shoot for the moon land amongst the stars aren't the stars further away I think they're a lot further away shoot for the stars and land amongst the clouds That actually a good conversation very far now to think about it like do you know what it is do you shoot for the stars land on the moon? Wait, you're the same boat as us. You said it's so definitively. We don't know either why would I want to land on the moon? It's a nothing dust rock. Yeah, it's high up. Yeah, but the stars are higher way higher. Yeah, come on brother What are you talking about? I think we can make this us more palatable for the Jonas brothers So let's start again. So I'll be Joe Jonas. How do you think this is gonna go? I'll be Joe Jonas and you're gonna work through the appropriate way to approach Because you clearly went in a bit of an aggressive route. Yeah, and you need to read you are just two guys hanging out I gave a phone to you. Well, you're not just two guys. That's Joe Jonas. That's Joe, bro That's burning up. Bro, he's a guy from New Jersey. That's DNCE. They're from New Jersey right cake by the ocean You know cake by the ocean. They are from New Jersey. That's right. So I got more in line with the Jonas brothers again Than you because I live in New Jersey now. This isn't a competition, Frank. I write it's not where you think you're playing it wrong I would play it as I don't even want them on the show tell us tell us. Yeah, I don't even want it Can I answer something? How many times have you spoken to Joe Jonas on social media? How many only one of us has Joe Brode. Let's get that out of the way. There was phone number. He did I said that was incorrect It was it was a choice. I made a decision. You be you Okay, and we're gonna work out to the appropriate way to approach one second. What were you gonna say? What's the appropriate thing to do? Uh, I was just I don't even want them here. I don't even want them to come on the show So how are we gonna get them on the show if that's your attitude Cuz he wants to like bait them. He wants to. Oh, this is what he likes He likes to edge people. You want to like Joe you want to you want to you want to edge Joe bro bait him? You want to edge the Jonas brothers Huh? You want it so I should be like oh, yes Yeah, I mean don't even follow that really? Oh, see I'm not built like that I'm not built to be that cool like you guys. I would just be like first of all I did the opposite. Yeah, so You know what you did do the you know what you did do though you shoot for the moon even if you miss you'll land amongst the stars No, you won't that's not how that's so space works. I know that's what there are no stars between us and the moon Neil Armstrong You said that what does he know? Neil should know but he's been there. Yeah, he knows there's no stars He's getting up there in age. Isn't even so alive this guy. Neil's got to be down in the ground. No Oh, sorry. Now Neil said shoot for the stars, but if you happen to miss shoot for the moon instead That's even I mean if you shoot in one direction you can hit both potentially Oh, and the cloud thing that was a Kanye take. Oh, you've been following him. What was that? Wait, what was that for the stars? So if you fall land on a cloud. That was what you said I didn't say any. Oh, yeah, that's from a song following Kanye. That's a Kanye song. I didn't That's awesome. No, I didn't I didn't think that what Joey said that one platform him I'm going to remove the platform for now. Can we do this now? Can I be Joe Jonas again? Yeah, I don't know what you're trying to do. I'm gonna be Joe Jonas I'm gonna say out like I'm gonna say my comment on the picture You're gonna respond and then you're gonna approach me in what would be a better way to approach Joe Jonas And the rest of the Jonas brothers. There's three to come on the show. All right. You ready? There's four Well, I mean, there are more brothers. I think I think the other I forgot the other one's name Frank More in line with what I have with Franklin I believe. Well, that's oh, it's his name. I almost Almost oh, you're gonna say something negative about his name wasn't gonna say his shitty name sucks That's crazy. Franklin. I would never say that about you. This guy saying that. That's insane anytime. I hear Franklin I just think of neither you guys have seen the rest of development. God damn it. Well, I think of the turtle And I fought with the turtle. Yeah, I didn't like it. It's Frank. Yeah, whatever All right, I'm Joe Jonas You say What would you say in your comment or you you did the whole like are we gonna hang out or I don't see you did yeah, I did like or why Joe yeah, so go ahead and say that part and then I'll be Joe and I'll respond Are we gonna hang out? Yes. Okay. I'm done with this That's that's I'm that's I'm sick of this I'm already done point being you know Yes, you take your shots. You see where you see what happens. I mean we haven't killed it. We don't know that it's dead Well it could come in at any time. I mean Here's the thing about the Jonas brothers. I think that they like doing fun quirky stuff Yeah, and I do think at our core we are fun quirky guys Okay, like us and them we all have that in common. So Jonas brothers just a just a good East Coast quirk Jonas brothers You guys want to you like having fun you like laughing you like talking you like reminiscing That's what we do that's what the show is so this is the basement yards official pitch. Oh, okay We are inviting rolling out the red carpet The J-O-B-R-O to the Joe bros to come be on the basement yard Yeah, I think it would be a great Great episode we can laugh we can talk we could sing we could just do a whole episode singing hey They will be singing on and I think it would be I think it's gonna come out of me in you too And I think it would be a good time. So listen Joe bros no pressure on you, but if you don't come you kind of You're gonna lose out your street appeal Joe just let me know just text me bro. It's fine. You'll see I think sit there. You know what I'm present there. You know what I'm gonna do Yeah, you know what I tried to do unsend it. They don't let you do that on tiktok I've also never sent a DM on tiktok before that was my first one. Oh for one And you can't on send it so that Here's what I'm gonna try to delete it and it was like delete for you. I was like well, that's not Here's where you messed up Here's where you messed up. Oh, I know where I messed up. Well, here's where you're messed up. You went Straight to the top you try to you you try to penetrate at the the the the hardest part of a mountain I don't like I don't like the term. I'm gonna message Franklin Jonas No, you can't know and I'm gonna get in that way. No, you know I would be like hey my buddy messaged your my your brother. He's a real piece of shit First of all, that's not good. Now we're double penetrating the brother. I'm looking at his father. So like I guess I'll message Kevin stop this So Franklin Jonas has Uh, what is that a 603,000 followers? Mm-hmm Joe Jonas On Instagram has 12.7. What's he more likely to say who's more likely to see this? I think if we can get in with Franklin. I didn't when you just said his name was a piece of shit You said that if you you said that Why would I insult my own name dude? We're gonna sign your name If I just like relate to him on a frank to frank basis first of all this could happen This is this is spiraled, but spiraled out spiraled up spiraled mountain banjo kazooie More of these words What is that the video game? Yes, I haven't played that in a very long time you should play it Well, I don't have I'm 64 because it's not 1912. I do 1912 1912 I don't think of a year. I always say 1912. Why is that well? That's when the Titanic went down So obviously it was a big year was it the 12? I thought and the war of 1912. What the hell was that? It was a war Is that the year the Titanic went down if I got that off rip? I am impressed with that in the jeopardy one I think it was 13 am I crazy 1912 oh 12 if I know I said I know the years of tragic events Okay, name another one 1941. Who's that Pearl Harbor? Yeah, that was a rough one 2001 It's also when the Oreo was invented when 1912 the Oreo was invented big year for big year for cookie bad year for ships Bad year for ships also about to be a good time for everyone the roaring 20s and then a very bad time Yeah, it was a pretty bad time for a lot of people a lot of people which it was Bro, what do you think the first Oreo tasted like in 1912 like that to suck? I'm not going to say it. I don't want to offend Oreo. Why? They're not even the same people. That's fair probably like really chocolate. I thought you were going to be offending like 1912. No, I'm offending current Oreos. That's great. I love Oreos. Don't get me wrong. Yeah. What is it? No, I don't know what it is. It is a brown dust black dust. Brown, brother. What type of the last time you had an Oreo? I mean, it's, they're black. Jet black. Yeah, yeah. It is, it is very, I mean, I love it. Oreos were the, like, were the first big cookie? No, chocolate chip came on the scene with their dicks out. I mean, when, though, when the chips are hoi, we got it. If we're taking it from, what's the best chocolate chip? Cookie. Chocolate. Chocolate chip. Like a brand that makes chocolate chip cookies. What's the best one? Oh, I kind of fuck with chips of hoi. I mean, honest with you. I do too, but bro, hear me out. Are you going with those old ones that are packaged like the famous Amos? Yeah. Oh, those are a good fucking cookie. No, I don't like the law of famous Amos. Famous Amos is suck on my anus. Amos. Amos. Amos. Not anus. I said anus. Yeah. No. No. I think I stand by. I think. Oh, green. Tates. Mag. Yeah. That's alright. Whoop. I have peaked. I think we peaked at cookies when we got or a chips of hoi candy blasts. The best. But there's other ones out there. Oh, sorry. I'm sorry. I'm getting over being sick. Okay. The fucking Kebler Elf. They make some pretty good ones. Did we say Entomans? Entomans. Entomans only makes good like coffee cakes. Oh, man, those tiny chocolate chips. I kind of fuck with them. Yeah, I used to put them in a bowl. No, little bites. Actually, I like those muffins. I mean, we've talked about this. And I'll say it again, the best cookie I've ever had were those ones that you'd get it like an after school program in New York City, where it was like the cinnamon raisin with like the white frosting on top. Yeah, the raisin or oatmeal frosted oatmeal. Yeah. Oh, I don't know what they were. But let me tell you, they sent a message to your parents and told them that it's time for fun. I also, although like cookie companies now that they make like crazy, like they're like cakes basically, when they do a chocolate chip cookie, it sucks. Like they're like cake in like dumbass shit that they make that like when I'm in the mood for a cookie like that, they made that's a great job. But the regular ones that they make, I'm like, you know what sucks? Chocolate chocolate chip cookies. Too much chocolate. I don't like when people like triple dark midnight cake. I'm like, bro, chill. Yeah, I mean, I'm not, I'm not a big fan of sponge cake as it is. Oh, I like a sponge. Like a fucking wet fucking like a cake. I want to just press it down and let it spit and squirt. You know, like a wet ass cake. Oh my god. How do we even unpack that one? You ever look at a cake and like you just go like this because you could see the light dancing off of like the sponge part. That's my favorite. I love it. I don't like sponge cake. I don't like a triple chocolate type shit though. I think sponge cake is overrated. I think that all sponge cake is the same. You've never had a sponge cake and be like, that's the best sponge cake. It's all the same. They all use box cakes. I mean, it's not all the same because there's stuff that you could put in the cake and also the icing is different and flavor different. Joey, I'll tell you this. One of the things I learned from John Bon Jovi was that it's all the same. Only the names will change. They literally are the exact same cake. They just add different shit on top of it and different hats, baby. Yeah, that's every food. No. Cakes. Cakes is all cakes. You like ice cream cake. I do love ice cream cake. Don't let me start. That's a different cake. No, but it's not sponge cake. I'm saying all sponge cakes is the same. They don't taste the same. They do. All some types of flavors. Sometimes they do different flavors and stuff like that. That would make them different. No, but it's all the same. How is it the same if it's different? Because it's all from sponge cake. All cakes are sponge cake except for ice cream cakes, which are they made their own cakes. I don't even know how to. So you think things that are different flavors are not different. They are in a little bit of a sense, but they are the same. Why? It's true. It's true. I'm shocked that you don't agree with me on this one. All cakes are the same. All cakes are the same, but they have a little difference. It's like books. If you read one book, you read them all. That's even dumber than what he said. All books are books. All books are books, but they just have different little words in them, which would make them different books. Am I going insane? All my therapists. Book a session for today. But listen to what you said that it makes them different books, but they're all books. What point did you make it? That doesn't, that's not the conversation. All books are books. You're, okay. All books are books. Are you our dictionary and Harry Potter? Are books. They are the same. So then cakes are cakes. Yes, that's what I said. So ice cream cake is a cake. No, but ice cream cake is not the same cake. The ice cream cakes are not cakes. The ice cream cake is only a cake because they are referencing its layering and its presentation for events and celebrations. That's insane. Like a graphic novel. A graphic novel. Exactly. You guys are rage-baiting me. No, I'm not. I'm being serious. You're rage-baiting. All books are books. You're baiting me. All books are books. Frankie is a master at it. I am not a master pater. You like that one, I do. I need to protect my piece right now with you guys, because it's really pissing me on. No, I do think though that all books are the same. All books are the same book. I mean, so the Bible is the same as see, don't do that, that any other religious book. I'm not even name them, because I was afraid he was gonna. Why? What's wrong with naming religious books? Because you're trying to violence bait me. What? You're trying to bait the violence against me. Sometimes you do this thing where you say a sentence and it means nothing and it just short circuits me, and that was one of them. And I'm like, I don't even know what to say to that. I got nothing. I mean, we could sword fight, we could sword fight, or we can get to these. Frank, don't do it. That thing's going to spark like crazy. And here we are. You didn't turn it on. I don't need to turn it on for it to be deadway. We still talking about swords here. Good Lord. Guys, listen, we have some sponsors for today. The first one being, how you doing? Better help. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp. BetterHelp is online therapy. So if you want to talk to a therapist, you can do so in under 48 hours by signing up for BetterHelp. It has helped a lot of people in this country. And yeah, they have a bunch of licensed therapists. I can get you all set up. They make it very easy. 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So if you're in the market for a new mattress or you're trying to just level up a little bit, BrooklynBedding.com and use that promo code basement for 30% off site-wide. Yes. What was that? I don't know. I didn't realize I had to go so quickly. Also guys, patreon.com/subbasementar. Thank you guys for an incredible 2025. We are so excited for 2026 and a big part of that is all the love and support that you guys have given us on Patreon, you know, looking back and how much growth there has been on that platform individually is kind of just astonishing, you know, since, you know, the show, you know, since I joined on the show back in 2020 and then all the way up until now. We love you and we thank you and we're so appreciative of all the love and all the support. 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You might not remember that I said that, but I'm gonna say it again just to clean your ears out. It's where you could get some leftover Tormerch that we have from the Tor this year. It's very limited quantities. So we can't confirm what is available, except for there are some things on there that you'll see we'll say sold out. But go check it out right now. TBYTORMERCH.com. If you weren't able to get it the first time, or if you weren't able to come to a show and something catches your eye, you'll be able to possibly get it there. So go check it out. Thank you. We appreciate it. And let's get back to it. - What's those defense that you're doing? - Why would you ever defend like this? Your hand was like this, and then you had that, yeah. - Well, I'm using my other energy with this hand to push your energy out. I really think I'm gonna do a sword fight with you after this. - Me? - Yep. - Or ant? - I think ant would be a good sword fighter. - Are you a good swordsman? - The best. - Well, it's not confident. - Well, the best sounds intense. - Are you bringing that? - No, I'll borrow one of the big ones. Which again, by the way, the fact that you two got the big ones and I got the small ones seems wildly disrespectful. - I don't know if you'd be able to handle the ones we have. (laughing) - You see that shit? I mean, all right, fine. Bring your big one, and I'll show you why this little one. I don't need a big one. Okay, this 'cause guess what? Might be smaller, but it works. It's just as deadly. - Boo. - It is much bigger. - Much is a stretch. It's about the same, not it. - Thank you, bye. - Yeah, pretty commonly. I didn't even tell you the other day I had, I wanted to pull my hair out, 'cause I was in the steam room. Excuse me, the sauna. And there was a, I walked in on like a 65 year old white woman talking with another person in the. - Co-ed sauna. - It was a co-ed one, 'cause the single head was out. Yes? No. (laughing) - Everyone was fully clothed. Myself included. - Okay. - And I walk in and she's talking about, she's like, yeah, we vacation. I'm not, this is exactly how I went. She's like, we vacation in Barbados and we love to go down there and live like the locals. And I was like, oh, fuck, how's this gonna happen? - Yeah. - And she was like, we go down there and we live like the locals on our catamaran. And I was like, okay, well now you lost it. - Wait, is that a boat? - Yeah, it's like a rich person. - Is that like the, it's got a net in the back or whatever? - I don't know if there are nets on the back, but you can look up catamaran. Don't ask me to spell it. - I feel like I know what it is. - But then she's like, we love living like a local in our catamaran. We eat seafood and then we go and we listen to, she goes, we go listen to live reggae. - Reggae? - Reggae. And I wanted to pull my hair out and put it down my own throat and choke on it. It was so fucking bad. - And she's just doing this like in the, she's like with her friend in the sauna. - Oh, she's talking to like another old rich white man. - It does have to get at the thing. - All right, all right. - All right. - I mean, that one does, has the net, yeah. - What is, listen, if you're gonna afford it, it's good for you. Joe probably will be there soon, if not already there. But like, it's a cool boat. - It's cool. - I don't fuck with boats. - You don't fuck with boats? - Don't fuck with boats, don't fuck with the ocean. - You wouldn't get on a boat? - Probably not. - Like a yacht party? - Nah. - But they don't go out to the, - Where do they go? Before you say anything, where do they go? - Not far from land. - But on what? - Water. - Which, - Right, you've been on water before. - Yeah, lakes, I'm cool with lakes, brother. You don't see yachts on water. - But why are you cool with lakes? - Because you have a good understanding of what's in that lake compared to what's in the ocean. 'Cause guess what could not get you in a lake? Great whites. - Yeah. - Yeah. Guess what, you can mostly see the bottom up. - I can't see three inches at the moment. - I mean, I'm saying like, but like, you could, you have a sense of like how deep this water is. Brother, the ocean? - What? - I feel like, you know, you never jumped in the ocean. - Off a boat? - Nope. - Never, never. - No, I have not. And watch, I'm gonna do you one further. - Yep. - I ain't gonna. - No? - No way, baby. - What if you were in like Europe, like the Mediterranean? - There's so much cool stuff on land. - Yeah. - But I'm saying like, if you're on a boat. - I'll put my feet in like on the beach where I can see my feet and see anything that would approach. But like, if you're telling me we're going, I'm not even saying far off shore. - You're saying we're going. - Not far. - 50 yards. - 50. 49 yards too many, baby. - Let me tell you, I am not doing it. - You ever jump in the ocean? - I went tubing. That's pretty far out. - In the ocean? - That's crazy. - That's bananas. - That is insane. - It's pretty far out, you fall on that, it's a problem. - Wait, you were tubing in the ocean? - Yeah. - The most fun part of tubing is falling off. - What's the ocean? What ocean? - Where were I to see it? - I don't know. - Well, where were you? - Oh, I went, I was in a rubah from one. - A rubah? - In Sicily from one. - Jamaica? - You were tubing in Sicily, they do that? - Yeah, that was a mistake. - Why was that a mistake? - Because we saw where we could be going out and in my head I said, well, as long as we're not going past that rock, 'cause that rock looks really far. And then we went probably 50 yards past it and great whites everywhere. In Sicily, like big, big, great white thing. - You're on a tube? - I'm on a banana boat. - So you're on a little banana boat. - You literally look like a snack. - So you're on your knees. - Yep. - And there's great white around. - I don't think you've been on a proper banana boat. You sit on a banana boat. You straddle it like a giant wing. - You still straddle like, you're straddle like, need up, no? - Yeah. - I mean, the way that we use to ride banana boats is you would be on your knees. But like, I can't believe that. - No way I'm getting out of this. - Yeah. - It was scary. But that's crazy 'cause they say like, like, fluttering and like, making a scene is what attracts sharks because they're like, oh, something's over there. I'm gonna go fuck and get it. - When we fell off, I said, let me go on first back on and I'll help everybody up. I just had to get up there. - Smart man, yeah. - I didn't want to be in that water. - Yeah. - Dude, 'cause that's the hardest part is waiting for them to come back and get you. That could feel like an eternity. Hell no. - I'm like, well, so I'm in agreement, like, that's crazy. I think that's a little nuts. But when I was in fucking, my orca, I went swimming in like a thing, but it's like, it's open ocean and then there's like a little cove and some of it you can touch the bottom and you can see whatever, but then somebody had goggles. So I put the goggles on and there's mad fish everywhere. It's fire. Like, you don't think that's cool to see? - No, very salty. - Yes. - Very salty, but I do, I would go in the Dead Sea. That one I would go into. - Is there anything in there? - No, because the salt content is too high. Literally why they call it a Dead Sea, 'cause nothing can live in it. That would be cool, 'cause you could like float. It's so salty, you can just chill. - I wonder if you'd be interested in a sensory deprivation tank. - People like lose their minds in those things, don't they? - Not that I've heard. - You start seeing faces maybe. I'd definitely like hallucinated a little bit. Well, hallucinated is like a very aggressive way to say that like, I'm, you're just in complete blackness and you're just kind of darkness. And you're floating in like salinated water, right? It's, yeah, you're like floating and it's the perfect temperature of your body so it feels like you're just floating. Is that not terrifying? Like why are we putting ourselves in these circumstances that are just kind of freaking us out? I think it's like relaxation. Like I find it to be a little relaxing. You both said you hallucinated a little bit. - Hallucinated was aggressive. I meant that I can kind of, it felt like I was seeing stuff but not like actual stuff, like little things. - So it's pitch black and I'm basically floating in nothingness and I can't hear anything. - You, that's also terrifying 'cause what if I start to drown? - You're, you can't. - What if they start, what if it's like a, if they start filling it up? - If they start filling it up with water. - No, you can get out at any time. - But why? How? - You just sit up and open up the thing. - But what if someone locks a thing and they start filling it up with water? - Well, no one can get in your room. - How do you know? - What? It's a room brother, yes they can. - No, so like you, so the one that I went to is like you walk into a room and you lock the door behind you, you have to take a shower and then you get into the, - I need a shower to get in this water? - Yeah, 'cause I mean it's, you know, it's a nice thing. But like you, you get in and then you close the thing. There's, they also had like a light show or like a guided meditation but I was like, I just want full nothing. - I, I think that like in those moments, I mean, you see how I am when we go with these Airbnb's on tour? I lock, I like, Marricade my doors and shit like that. Like, I am fully preparing to like, oh, someone can come in here and just start filling this up with water and then I'm going. But they can't, like the water is like this, it's like being in a tub. - Yeah, but the, how big is the enclosure? - It's, it's a big enclosure, what do you mean? - How big is the enclosure? Like how much room is between you and the ceiling? - Yeah, you could probably touch it. - Okay. What happens if they start filling it up with water? It would like pour, like it's not deep. Like the water is like this deep. - He's not getting me. - It's like you saying like, okay. - But how would they get in and start filling it up? - I don't know, but I got to think about this stuff. - But how would that even, I'm gonna confuse how that's a worry. - Listen, it's hard being me and. - What was that? (laughing) - That was funny. I'm just saying maybe there are people out there that want me dead and maybe they could find that I'm in a sensory deprivation tank and start filling up with water. It's not something that locks. How do you know? I went to it. Have you been in one that they're all the same? Five jubbies back, baby. He's back 100%. We should go. We should do one. They scare me. They really do. I'm not kidding. It's a little freaky, but like once you get there. Like also massages. I've gotten a couple like 60-minute massages. That's terrifying, too. What? They're kind of scary. You're like super like this person can just like you're relaxing and then they can just grab a knife and stab you in the back. Yeah, that's your whole life. I know. It's scary. Like when I get when I go get here. Yes, and you're thinking about sometimes. How can you possibly relax during a massage? Sometimes. You're thinking, yo, this is going great, but if this woman takes a knife and puts it in the back of my skull. Like, yo, when I go to get a haircut. Now they'll be like, hey, do you mind if I use a straight razor? I'm like, yeah, of course, go ahead. And then I'm like, yo, all they have to do is just go like that. And I'm gone. It's a wild way to live. I mean, you need to prepare yourself. How are you preparing against a knife attack? That was a stupid question. How easy you know. You've got to keep that thing on you all the time. And I always have that thing on me. But you don't have weapons. You're not a weapons guy. Not a weapons guy. Because I have the ultimate weapon. You know, what do they say? The pen is mightier than the sword, but the tongue can lick them both. I have never heard that. I've said that with much a plum. And I'm upset that you guys didn't realize it. The tongue can lick them both. The tongue can. But I don't know what that's going to do. I mean, it's a saying. The pen. What does it even mean? Well, because the swords are normally what we're used to kill people. Right. Okay. The sword is mighty. But you know what's even mightier than that? The pen. Because it. The written word. It can enact change. It can enact change. But guess what? It can lick them both. The tongue. But what does that mean? There is a hierarchy to power. And, you know, being able to. Move the masses. The sword could do it. The pen could do it stronger. But then the tongue could lick them both. I think there's a better way to say that. Because I feel like if you lick the knife or a sword. You'd be in for a rough one. I'd be your last lick. You could lick a sword. Well, well the pen is mightier than the sword But the tongue is mightier than them both put together is What do you tell me that you made it up? No, I've heard that somewhere. Can't lick them. I've heard that somewhere Type that in right now. If it doesn't show up. I'm literally calling the police that what I that's what I was typing in and that's the phrase I kept coming up. It's close, but no, it is not close. Oh, I've heard this. Don't listen. Don't do this. I didn't. I did. Don't do this. Type that in if there's zero No, I've heard that. I've heard it somewhere in your dream. No, no, no. I've heard this. Let's ask Joe Jonas. He's probably text Joe Joe is very Yeah, Joe Jonas. He's text me right now. Yeah, what did you say? I did have a text from a number that I I didn't have and it was Verizon I have a rise into. I love it. I'm gonna be honest with you. I enjoy it. It's not here There's no way. I refuse to believe that. You're thinking how could what would the tongue licking a pen or a sword meme because that doesn't like stop the soul like I mean, it's just a saying Joey now I'm panicking over here But the tongue can lick them both I hope that you find something I I really hope so. I also hope you find something from good reads Good read Marcus Garth. Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah, that's the one. Yep. Yep. Read that one. Read that one. What's it say? This is the phrase he's thinking of it's Marcus Garvey, right? Yeah, yeah That's what I said It's a the pen is minor than the sword, but the tongue is minor than them both put together I am telling you I've heard about the tongue licking if you took a pen and a sword and you put them together You can lick them. I'm telling you. I didn't make that up if I did make that up. That's way better than Marcus Garvey's No, it does it makes sense. Yes, it does make sense Like guess what can lick both the pen and the sword the tongue. What good does that do? It's a it's a it's euphemism Joey. It's symbolic It's simple. I understand that but like I think if anything my version of it is way better than Marcus Garvey's we know I'm just saying you know, but the tongue can lick them both. I mean we have to make posters now Like that is I mean is that not I think that's a cool just you and like that outfit with an apple or That's just I mean if someone has the made that yet I'd be astonished and that is so good. I do think I mean Guys, yeah, all quotes need to come from somewhere. Yeah, so like I'm sure when the first time someone said You know, the pen is minor than the sword. They were just like what Oh, what What is that yeah, well, that's not how it was framed. You said it's like they say They have said it They have said it dude. This is 2025. We have the internet. That means Everything's in there. No, it doesn't know it doesn't there are stories that we have as individuals that have been passed down Are not necessarily on the internet yet, right? You know think of all your dad Maybe your dad said it and you're like oh, that's if my dad said that right. He's a genius However, I can with confidence say he probably didn't and he probably isn't the tongue can lick them both The tongue can lick everything the tongue can lick everything. That's right. It's just meant to encapsulate that the power of good orators You know, they can go out there with much a plomb and they can move people based off of the spoken word I think that that is a very clever way to say that and and I'm going to take my victory laughs You should because that that was I'm really glad that we got that on camera We do have some more sponsors for this show before we move forward with more quotes from our You know a resident philosopher here. Yes monitor de plato We have prize picks. Okay prize picks is a fun game that you can play during the football season here and Basically, you are competing against the prize picks projection So they'll make a protection projection. They'll say strap is Kelsey going to have more or less than four and a half catches You could say more or less and you do that a couple times and build these lineups and you could win a bunch of money Then they have a new feature also that has early payouts. So if you're You know your player gets off to a hot start you have the option to cash out those winnings before the gaming finishes So that's an easier way to kind of make money as well, but You know, you kind of do this Like I said you build a lineup with a couple of these things and it's not just football. 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Pink No, okay, that's not I mean, what do they look like Pink yeah and small Lace You're it's on fucking fire. Yeah, like the shape. I think I think I think panties is more like lace Is not panties lace is bananas. Lace is not panties. I'm thinking like a cotton blend. Oh You're thinking a cotton blend. I'm thinking like you know like polyester Sure, that could be in there you know, but I'm thinking like what what would be like the equivalent to our boxers You know like something a little more comfortable than just a fucking piece of thread and some of that's whole. - Yeah, 'cause thongs are thongs. - Yeah, thongs are thongs. - So like a panty though. Like you think in a granny panty? - I think I don't think it's as pronounced as a granny panty. I think granny panties are a little more loose fitting and larger, I think these are a cover of the whole butt. Yeah, I think these are a little more pronounced, but still there's a good mix of like, granny panties going for entirely. - It's a diaper, too much on comfort. - Yeah. - A panty is like a mix of comfort and style. - Okay. - And then a thong is just, it doesn't even care about comfort at all. - What do you think of panties? - Pink, pink. (laughing) - So that was great. - My bad. - All right. - Yeah. I have some New Year's resolutions. I think I'm really trying to be the best version of myself. I wanna be more active and stuff like that. The normal stuff. I'm pretty basic with my New Year's resolutions every year. I mean, it's easy because during the holiday season, I really commit to eating a piece of shit. - Right. - You know, really getting apt. I mean, it's all hams and fucking butter stuff. - Had ham yesterday. My mom made a ham. - She made a ham? - Oh, God. - Handed it up. - Also did a number on the mashed potatoes. - Ooh. - Yeah, dude. - Did she have her world famous broccoli? - Did she make the broccoli? - Yeah, she made the broccoli. - Broccoli's fantastic also. But yeah, the fucking mashed potatoes really threw me. I wasn't expecting that. - Is the ham repeating on you today? Are you feeling it? - No, I didn't have that much ham. - How much ham are you talking? - Like three pieces. - What size piece? - Oh, yeah. - You get one of the, you know, the big hunks. - Yeah, the hunk, the hunks are crazy. And I was like, I just, I know too much about the. - You knew sodium. - Just to be very clear. You knew nothing about ham pre one month ago. - I knew what it tasted like. - Gotcha. - And that was enough of me. - And you knew it was probably not healthy. - Yeah. - You just didn't know. - Well, I did know, like I now I know I'm too aware of like the sodium, so I'm like, oh, I can't. But like whatever. - I mean, it's just all just drink a lot of water. You'll be all right. - Yeah. - It's an easy way to fix it. - Okay, what else did she have? I don't even remember, but it was a great dinner. Loved it, hammed it. Also was putting some of the ham juice. And it was a dip in my dinner all in it. It was pretty fucking good. - Ham juice doesn't sound like the juice. - Oh, like the glaze. Well, it's like, it's a little bit juice. And you put a, you pour it back on your ham. - It's in a little like, genie lamp. - Yeah, you don't do that? - Gravy. - It's not gravy. - No, gravy, guys. - It's not gravy. - What juice? - It's like a liquidy. It's liquidy. It's not gravy. It's not like thick. - I don't, I can't even tell you. - You've never poured anything on a ham? - No, it's baked with a, it's cooked with a glaze and then you come out and you cut it up and eat it. - Oh wow. - You do the juice? - Yeah, I'm juicy. - Yeah, we do juices. - Juiced it up. - Yeah, there's like a hole. My mom has like a little thing of juice. And we ladle it on. - Yep. - Juice. - Either the ham, if you make a little sandwich or bread, you put some juice on the bread. - Juice. - Yeah. - What? Not even ever. When you take it out of the thing, I don't even know. I don't know if it's coming out of the ham and it's just in the pan. - I mean, if you're calling it ham juice. - Yeah. I mean, it's for the ham juice. - Like juice. - It sounds like an uncooked kind of sanitary nightmare when you say it like that ham juice. Like if I said chicken juice, you'd be like, oh, hold on. - No, but that's still kind of existing. I know when you're cooking it and it's in the pan. - Yeah, that's juice, my guys. That's like the gravy, the oils. - It's definitely not a gravy. - It's not yet. - It's certainly not. - Not thick to be a gravy. - Not at all. - Not at all. - Wrong word. - It's also like see-through. It's reddish. - It's clear. - It's not clear. - No. - I need to see what brownish. - What your juices are. - Am I? - Could you pull up ham juice? - This is crazy. - Could you pull up ham juice for me? - I don't know. - I think you'll be able to find it. - You've never had a ham juice. - You know what? You can't find my house. - You can't find a lot of things on the internet because they didn't have that. - That ain't it. - I hope that's like a ham broth. - What the fuck? - What the fuck is this? - None of this looks particularly like, you know. - Should I call my mom and ask her about ham juice? - Ask your mom about ham juice. - All right, let me call my mom. - See my mom, what the hell is the ham juice? All right, let me. - I just, I think, like I said, if I were to say here I got to think a turkey juice, he'd be like, what the fuck? - Let's find out what business is doing. She better answer. She better. - Hey, mama. - Oh, you're on the basement yard at the moment. I have a question. - Hi, Liz. - Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I got to turn the meatball over. - Turn the meatball over. - It sounds like you're in the shower. - You got any meatball juice? - Mom. - Can't eat me. - Oh, yeah, yeah, you hold on. - What happened? - I'm on the basement yard. (laughing) - It was key. - It was key. - Mom. - All right, let me take you off speaker now. - Okay. - Hi. - Hello. - Oh, he said hi. Hi, Liz. - Frank says hi. - He didn't tell her I said hi. - Frank says hi. - So we're talking about yesterday we had ham, right? - Uh-huh. - And now the juice that we put on the ham, ham juice. - Well, it's okay. - What is that? 'Cause Frank's never heard of ham juice. He's never heard of ham juice. - He's never been juiced. He's never juiced his ham. - Well, let me tell you how it makes it. And it turns into a juice. It's not juice of the ham. - Okay. - It's what I put over it, like some people glaze a ham. - Yeah. - But um, I put the big ham in the pan. And I put mustard. - Yeah. - And I put a lot of ground sugar. I put the pineapple juice from the can of pineapples. - Uh-huh. - And I'm gonna put her on there. And I put, what else do I put? A little bit of ginger ale if they need a little more. - Oh. - Frank hates syrup. - Oh. - I mean, don't give this away if we have, you know. No, but. - It's good. - So wait, that's what the juice is. - That sounds like a glaze. - So that when it all melts down and with the sugar. - It's a glaze. - And whatever. It's like a glaze, but it's more like a gravy. So just like, you know. - It's not a gravy, mom. - Well, we use it, you know, you put the ham on your plate and then you put the-- - Yeah, but a gravy is like thick. It's like a, it's like watery. But is that, so the thing that you're dumping, you're dumping that on the ham when it's cooking, right? - No, no, I put it all on and then I put it in the oven and forget about it. - So she glazed, if you get about it, you're so much. So she glazes the ham with this concoction. - Yeah. - And then all the, clearly like the sugars and stuff bind and stick to the ham and then the liquid that's left, she uses a ladle on it's kind of like a gravy. - That's what we said. - Yeah, that's why I'm calling it angels. - But you said it's that, but I said it sounds like the glaze and you were like, no, it's ham. - No, you're like, you glaze it first. All right, I'm gonna have a different conversation with Frank. But you're, like this is all that you put on the ham and then it kind of gets into the pan and then you pour that into a cup. - Yeah, after I take the ham out to the slice, I, the rest of it I pour into a thing. I mean, I could separate, you know, if there's any like real fatty grease, you know, I could use the gravy separated to get rid of that. And then we just pour on the rest. - All right, well, do you answer my question? Thank you so much. Save me some meatballs. I'm coming over tomorrow, by the way. - Gotcha. - All right, I love you. - All right. - Bye Liz. - Merry Christmas. - I'm not saying anything, Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas is crazy. Merry Christmas is crazy. I apologize. No, no, no, no. So I'm right. So I was right. - This isn't about right or wrong. - I need to hold on to any bit of being right that I can get. - This isn't right or wrong. I was saying there is a juice that comes from the ham, like in the pan and then you ladle it onto your stuff. - Yeah, but you said, I was like, oh, it sounds like it's for like from the glaze and you said no. I thought it was-- - You said the way it sounded and maybe I'm completely misinterpreting it was like, it was a separate juice that like your mom like, oh, I didn't know whether that was right or wrong. Like I didn't know whether she made it separately, but I assumed that it came out of the ham. That's why I was like, how have you never heard a ham juice? I assume it's in the pan. That's the juice. - I think we were, we kind of were both explaining this. - You based the ham. - Yes, but we were explaining the same things, but just in different ways if that makes any sense. I've had ham juice. - No, but my whole question, how to start it was, do you ladle stuff onto your way? But that's the question, that's what I'm saying. - Yeah, but then you were saying ham juice and I was like, what the fuck does this juice come from? - It's the juice for the ham. - From your mom glazing the ham. - I think we lost once she used the word gravy. - Yeah, it's certainly not a gravy. I don't care what she says. Like it's not a gravy. - The ginger ale, I wrote down the recipe obviously, but the ginger ale, that was surprising. - Oh, my dad, like his thing. He's like, my dad just, the only thing he does to his ham is he pours like five cans of Coca-Cola. - I've seen people do that online. - That's a lot of Coca-Cola. - I think it's just because of like the sugar content. It basically, once you cook it, it just, it crystallizes basically and. - Yeah. - Do you do mustard with your glaze? - Back it is, yeah. - And you're all right with that. - It buries it, right? It buries it. - Yeah, guys, listen, we can talk about it. - I feel like we should myth bust this. - Bust the myth a little. - Yeah, I, you gotta be open, I'm open. I have had and continued to have mustard. Incorporated into dishes, right, you know like it's just like hot or like yellow mustard or brown mustard Yellow mustard is great on something or like as a dip or something No way not filthy disgusting. I will say not liking honey mustard is very confusing. I just it's it's the mustard. It's just mustard Sturred mustard It's like mustard like a slur mustard. Yeah I that is disgusting to me and it doesn't make sense because a lot of people say like oh, it's like very vinegary tasting and stuff like that I love vinegar. I don't like mustard. I wouldn't describe that. I think yellow mustard is like what well That's what yellow mustard. What's the one with the little brown beads? That's like brown mustard or Dijon or anything You know that is you know how they make that no they soak it in like vinegar and then they puree it as it I believe that's One of the methods you know what blew my mind almond milk is just crushed up almonds Well, they got a soak and water and then they blend them together, but isn't that weird? You can milk and almond. I know I mean, it's it's more like a milk smooth. It's like an almond smoothie But you know, I'm sorry. I mean, yeah, I mean, I've seen videos of people making it. I'm like there's got to be more I don't believe this and no almond milk. I know it's a good alternative You've said it in the past and I wanted to strangle you. It's not better than the whole milk I said that almond milk was better. Yeah, you said you prefer the taste which I have to take your preference and Destroy I don't think that I don't even remember what a whole milk tastes like I haven't had it in so long delicious Let me tell you brother. Maybe I've had it like in stuff like I'm sure like ice cream has like whole milk in it or you know Milk guy No, because I think oat milk my head One time I put in a coffee just to like try it and I was like that ruined my coffee. I've had I've had all the cashew, oat milk, hemp milk, almond milk. I've only really had almond It's it's just not milk it there like it's like there's no taste or flavoring to it. It's just white and I mean sometimes I would get an almond milk that would have like a vanilla in it and that's it is No, I would eat serious. Yes, so the we are myth-busting here I I've had and will continue to have mustard incorporated into dishes But not when it's like a player, you know what I'm saying? Like not when it's like on the cover of madden so like You wouldn't do like a pretzel dipped in like a D. John. No way that's crazy, but Every time we've had Texas barbecue the like the binder is mustard. Yeah, and like that doesn't bother me at all There's a ton of other shit in there too. Yeah, I'll love when there's like a peppery crust I'm gonna tell you right now. I recently was thinking about that Texas barbecue we had and Man, I actually had a very good. I went to a steakhouse recently. Oh, yeah, and I speak in my language and it was in midtown so Finance people mind you. It's 1 p.m. Not my idea to go here obviously to go to a fucking steakhouse at 1 p.m But at a at a steakhouse a bunch of finance do's there martinis steaks. I'm like, how can I like wouldn't have survived that industry at all but they had a bunch of these fucking Papery crusts on these steaks. Oh, yeah, so good and a lobster mac and cheese that would make you take your head Pull it off and suck your own weiner. You don't have the Like stomach strength for a lot of the best foods Call my doctor tell me I don't need one now since you're the one Consistently making up stomach issues. No, but like listen to what you just said that sounds like the best lunch I've ever had, but if you went as such a heavy thing to eat exactly if you went and had a lunch that was Martinis and steaks and lobster mac and cheese and throw in dessert you as Joey you would need to go lie down No, it's not about that. It's about like this is an insane thing. I'd walk out there and I'd be like this is quite possibly The most energized I've ever felt to my entire life, but eating that and then being like I'm gonna have a dinner later It's crazy to me Monday to Friday. I mean no doing that every day is that is crazy. Yeah, you're sprinting You're like for it. I mean metabolism brother like I can eat a big lunch at 1 p.m. A steak whatever and I will be ready for dinner at five or six That's just it's not like of interest like it feels like that's such a heavy thing And I think I think that's I think that's also and you know jokes aside like the whole stomach thing like I think that's the the difference for you is like You're just like oh, I'd rather not eat that and feel a little sluggish But I'm like I don't care. It just strikes me as a dinner food steak Like yeah, like that meal steak is universal baby steak and eggs. Yeah, I just you ever had steak and eggs? I've had it. Oh, yeah, it's not it's I definitely wouldn't get that like I feel like my meals need to be like light to heavy really yeah like the lightest stuff in the morning and then something else and then the dinner One can be whatever brother not super light, but you know every single one of my meals could be like a fucking full diaper of Baby shit. I will say when we're on the we're on the road and we stop at a fucking book. He's then I'm getting some brisket sandwiches Yo, don't matter what time it is those brisket and egg blew me away shocked me. I didn't think it was gonna be good at all like That whole experience I'm not kidding Listen a lot of people could say a lot of things about America, especially today Lord knows I do or knows you don't the Like microcosm of like America is buttons It is that's what people probably view us as yeah, and and and honestly, I'm not ashamed of that because it's good food It's reasonable prices. It's well-paid employees and a fat ass wall of jerky and a brother and a beaver a wall of jerky. What about the wall of sodas? Miss that Yo, they had fountain sodas for fucking days. Did they when we were down there? You didn't see it was like big red No, that's like their drink in Texas when we were at when we were at the the pecan lodge in Dallas, which by the way those good They're fucking they're like they were like our drink a choice like on the tap. They had two sections for big red and it's just Fruit punch soda they had a good candy section, too. Oh, what's that shit beaver tail beaver crunch? Yeah, I the fuck I they're like little corn pops. Yeah, those things are fucking Right now beaver beaver shit. What is it called? Beaver nuggets, Bucky's beaver something like a beaver nuggets. Yeah, what are those called bussey nuggets? What? Excuse me. Busy buckies. Busy. No, it's a beaver nugget You know a bus in it, right? It's like a sweet little it looks like a cornpuff. Yeah, I Hello, yeah beaver nuggets That's what it is beaver nuggets corn puff snacks. Oh, so they are so probably not good for you. I mean, it's like fried It's just a puff syrup puff. Yeah, 14 sugars. Oh 14 grams of sugar. Yeah, and there's 13 serving sizes in the bag. I ate one. I ate well I didn't eat the whole half a bag. I ate half a bag in the ride to I don't know, maybe 15 minutes somewhere That's a big bag. Oh, yeah, so no, no, I stopped for my health not because I needed to show it when we got to wherever we were going Next you ran like three quarters of a marathon It's like I got a burn off this Bucky's but the Bucky's Hey, never I mean, I'm where we're gay picky boys picky boys video. You go you go to write the bucket. There you go Good. I was sent a Bucky's costume the pillbox. Yeah, you know that's good. You go to go to this is just document the experience Well, we're giving you free stuff here. This is a great idea You fly to Texas and then you go to as many bucks as you can go to in 24 hours. I mean, that would be that would be it We went to four You went to four we went to four twenty we drove driving into Houston. Why is a good question? Why or why not? I think it's the right question or or did we know we were doing that is better I think the first time so we we talked not talk shit, but like Zach was just like he was talking it up Similar to what we were saying, but like he was all about it and then on the drive He was like guys were passing a Bucky's on the drive from Dallas to Houston and we were like all right Whatever like we'll stop to appease you we walked in blown away, bro blown away the brisket's good It was a frisket on the board. It was a four hour drive or three and a half hours. What was it? I don't know we stopped at another one. Yeah, and not like all Freaking needs to stop it was like everyone's just like where is it? All right, there's another I miss it and then two more and then leaving Houston to to go to Austin Yeah, two more Okay, and I don't think that we realized that we had done that until it was over and we're like we just did four So it became a problem when like the next morning we were just like we'll just go to Bucky's for breakfast Yeah, I would have if they had one up here. I'm telling you it is. Yo, I'm letting you know right now. That's one of those places. I'm driving and experiencing traffic to go and experience. Like, you should do that though, it's a funny video. - 'Cause you guys did it for the Rainforest Cafe. - We did. - At a-- - Just hitting a bucket. - In many apples, right? - Yeah, in many apples. - A spun a wheel. - If you find an area where there's like enough like within a reasonable driving distance, you could probably hit a bunch. - I'm sure, like, I think there's one in Florida, which is an easier drive than, I mean, easier to fly than Texas. - Also, great bathrooms. - A literally award-winning bathrooms. - Yeah, award-winning? - Yes, they got recognized by, like, you know, like, rest stop daily or something like that. - There are award-winning stars outside the-- - Yeah, they have a car wash. They have a lot of different, like, gas pumps. So, like, they're there for the peep, for the people. - I'm looking up the closest buckies for you. - But closest one is in, like, Tennessee, I think. - But every 15 minutes, is there a thunderstorm? - Every 15 minutes, there's a thunderstorm and fucking rain forest cafe. - Yeah. - That sucks. No one cares about it. - Is it just lightning and nothing? - Yeah, the animal's-- - The closest buckies is in Florence, South Carolina. - Ah. - And it is a, let's say we were to drive from here. Let's say we were to drive from right here. - Yeah. - That's a bit of a drive. - Nine, 10? - 10 and a half. - Yeah. - But that flight is like, our buck 20? - Yeah. - If that. - Dude. - Seeing if I could hit 10 buckies in 24 hours? - Bro. - There's that two weeks. - With enough enthusiasm and gas? - Yeah. - All right. - I mean, I don't even know if that's true, but it would be something. - I mean, you gotta get a brisket sandwich every time. - Yeah, it's really, I'm not even kidding, like-- - Or some jerky, definitely some beaver nuggets. - No, it sounds like something I sent Danny to do. - Yeah, I mean, Danny would probably rip that place to shreds. - Places amazing. And I'm gonna find a way to get back there soon. - I saw a bird in one. - That's cool. - Yeah, he just was like walking in and out near the exit, 'cause he knows what's going on. - What kind of bird? - It was like a pigeon. - That's cool. - But he was just like, you know, like, I know there's brisket in here. - I mean, if you're a bird, the place to live is buckies. - Yeah, you know, you gotta commit to it. - It's not a bang for your buck. - I mean, oh my God, I didn't realize I sent that. - Look at that. - Buckies, higher the guy. - Let's get a brand new, yo, you think buckies will be a sponsor? - No. - I don't think they need any more marketing, like people, it's like a mythological creature. - Why don't we start a buckies up here? - Are they privately owned? - But can we be like franchisees? - No, 'cause they're privately owned. - So like, hit up Mr. and Mrs. Bucky. - And be like. - Listen, my name is Joe Sanogato. You might recognize me from my friend Joe Jonas. - My friend Joe Jonas, people of the inner, people of Walmart, version 28, and co-host of the wildly popular and incredibly funny basement yard. I am looking to expand my business empire. Now, the best way to do that would be gas station. Gas station to bring an iconic piece of the United States to the Northeast. Let me introduce you to, and then you would pull a big like sheet, and you would have like a model, you know how they do that, and those like movies and stuff like that, and be like, buckies of New York. And it would be a fucking one city block in Manhattan, and it's a buckies. And it's a five foot tall, no, five story tall buckies. - Five foot tall buckies. - Do I know how, if you own that land, why even open it, just the land is worth more at that point? - He's not thinking, got it. - Yeah, yeah. - I'm not. You know how like the garages in Manhattan have like the garage, the bottom part is the parking garage? - Uh-huh. - The bottom part will be all the gas station pumps. - Yeah. - First level, buckies brisket. Second level, merch. Third level, executive offices. Fourth and fifth, hotel rooms. Buckies themed hotel rooms. - Quavin' indoor pool. - On the roof. - That's not indoor. (laughs) - On the roof in a bubble. - Okay. - But the bubble is shaped like bucky the beaver. - Amen. - I, whenever I have these business ideas, I, I, I surprise myself with how good they are. - Yeah, me too, I'm so surprised. But, all that to say, it's a lovely gas station. And we're big fans. And I really would, I really honestly think it's one of the best breakfast sandwiches I've ever had. Like, it's definitely within my top five. Definitely it's crazy. Top seven, no, for sure. - Doesn't top seven just mean it's seventh? - It could be five to seven, you know? - I would say top five, the, the, the egg and brisket, breakfast burrito, whatever that was, good bro. It's good. And like, yo, you know how I feel about flour tortillas, it was a perfectly cooked flour tortilla. - I got mine in a bun. - Perfect, it's so good. - Anyway, that's all we have for you today. Oh wait, this is the first episode of the new year. So welcome to 2026. - Yes. - Happy new year and stuff. - Happy new year. - Yay. - We started talking, we tried talking about our resolutions. I want to call you a bitch less. That's what I, that's one of my ones. I want to say, I want to use bitch directed at you less. - What a resolution. - I mean, I think it's something that I can work on. - How about, not gonna hold my breath. - How about, I tally it and every time you call him one on here, you owe him a hundred bucks. - A hundred bucks? - Yeah, that would keep him. - Ten bucks. - Ten bucks, I'll tell ya. - Ten bucks for every bitch, at the end of the year. - All right, but you need a word to them. - What do I call you a lot? - Well, we can't say those slurs on here. - That was good. - Set that one right up. - About every time he points at you, ten bucks. - Ooh, that's a good one, yeah. - Okay. - All right. - And then at the end of the year. - You give it all to me. - No, we'll give it all to you. - We're just full of ideas in this show. - We'll give it all to Jared. - Yes, of course, I like that. - The charity is named. - Francesco for new collectibles. - For new business ideas, for opening up a buckies in Manhattan. - All right, so it'll be the bitch count and the point count. - Okay. - Love it. - I think you need to actually say on top of it, though, too. - I will. - And then you gotta throw in $10 every time you fucking make a some sexual remark over there. - Yeah, you're a horny, dude. - You're a horny boy. - Glory holds over there. - Yeah. - Pink panties. - You throw $10 down right now. - Yeah. (laughing) - That'd really be handcuffing me there. - Yeah. (laughing) - That's a sexual one, too. - Horny. - $20. - You want to be handcuffed. - Yeah. (laughing) - But that is all for this week's episode. Frank, where can they find you? - The Frank Alvers on social media everywhere, and then make sure you check out TBY Tor merch. For any available pieces of our merch from our tour, if you wanna try to get your hands on them. - And? - And you can find me at antprisco on Instagram. - Oh, it's a new year. - It isn't a new year. - We're gonna edit that out. - Yeah. - Go follow me at Joe's here and I got it on the basement yard. - But he's always just bleeped over what he said. - And that is all. We'll see you guys next time.

Podcast Summary

Key Points:

  1. The host jokes about a failed sword fight and expresses confidence in his own combat skills, despite no actual training or experience.
  2. He shares a humorous anecdote about accidentally interacting with Joe Jonas on TikTok, leading to a direct and bold DM that he later regrets, highlighting a contrast in approach between himself and the Jonas brothers.
  3. The conversation shifts to a playful discussion about writing a book, with the host jokingly claiming he could write it, inspired by his childhood and life experiences.
  4. A major theme is the idea of "appropriately" approaching the Jonas brothers, with the host suggesting a more lighthearted, fun, and relatable tone rather than aggressive or over-the-top behavior.
  5. The dialogue includes a surreal and absurd debate about the nature of books and cakes, culminating in a humorous claim that all books and cakes are fundamentally the same.
  6. The host promotes various sponsors, including BetterHelp, Brooklyn Bedding, and HelloFresh, emphasizing wellness, sleep, and healthy habits.
  7. A central comedic moment involves a fictional or misheard quote about the tongue being able to "lick both the pen and sword," sparking a humorous debate over its origin and meaning.
  8. The conversation ends with a lighthearted discussion about New Year’s resolutions, ham, and the confusion over what “ham juice” actually is, blending humor with personal memory.

Summary:

The conversation is a humorous, self-deprecating, and often absurd exchange centered around the host’s exaggerated self-confidence in sword-fighting and storytelling. He shares a funny anecdote about a direct DM to Joe Jonas on TikTok, which he later regrets, illustrating a contrast with the more playful, approachable nature of the Jonas brothers. The discussion then veers into creative territory, with the host jokingly proposing a book about his life, including childhood memories and a YouTube journey.

A major theme is the idea of adopting a fun, non-aggressive approach to engaging with pop culture icons like the Jonas brothers, emphasizing relatability over boldness. The dialogue includes surreal debates about the sameness of books and cakes, highlighting a shared love for absurd humor. Throughout, the host promotes various sponsors, from mental health services to mattresses and meal kits, all while maintaining a casual, unfiltered tone.

The conversation ends with a playful, chaotic discussion about ham juice, which leads to a comedic call to his mother for clarification, underscoring the show’s blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and banter. The overall tone is lighthearted, self-aware, and filled with jokes about trivialities, making it both entertaining and authentic.

FAQs

I think I could be a good sword fighter based on my experiences and childhood fascination with ninjas, though I’ve never trained formally. I believe in the skills and potential, even if it's just in theory.

I’d write a book titled 'From the Basement to the Irish Boy' with chapters about my childhood, upbringing, and how I started a YouTube channel. It would mix personal stories with humor and a fun, relatable tone.

Yes, I interacted with Joe Jonas on TikTok after he used one of our show audios. I responded with a direct 'are we gonna hang out?' message, and he followed me. I sent him my phone number, which was a bold move I later regretted.

A respectful approach would be to start with a friendly, casual comment like 'Hey, nice pic!' and then build a conversation naturally. It’s better to be playful and relatable than aggressive or direct.

The saying is well-known, but I think a better version is 'the tongue can lick both the pen and the sword,' emphasizing the power of spoken word to influence and move people.

They’re a unique experience—some find them calming, others terrifying. I’d be cautious, as the complete silence and darkness can be overwhelming, though it might offer a form of deep relaxation.

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