#532 - Decorating For The Holiday Season!

pink panther is here coach and spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together and they want you to be part of it grab your friends and head to the tabby tour hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists exclusive experiences and personalized products and discover custom playlists on spotify built just for you based on who you are and how you listen live your story with coach learn more at coach.com welcome back to the welcome back to the basement yard are you scatting no i'm doing like the beginning of like christmas songs when they have like the bells but they're like not bells you know what i'm talking about it look it sounds like it's just like you know that is that that's a great add-on to that song dude the ding ding ding-a-ling-dong-ding in the background amazing i'm happy holidays happy holidays we got trees got a tree they're naked and they won't be they won't be naked baby aunt decided to put them up for the fucking for the episodes i also have a tree you also have a tree right here yeah right exactly this art is not imitating real life right now because your tree is probably more likely bigger than both the bars combined wait what are you talking about oh that's what you're talking about yeah you got a big what a loser with his big dick and balls oh let me guess life is so great having a massive dong oh man how am i even gonna drag this around the whole holiday i am doing a perspective thing for sure because this tree looks way bigger on there than what it is yeah well i mean that's part of it that's part of the game my friend you gotta play the game in order to win the match what's your favorite christmas song uh you're gonna hate my answer i told you this a million times is it jingle bells no no no it's mele kalikimaka oh you're one of those guys well it was my mom's and like she always yeah my mom is a big bing crosby guy your mom seems like a um fucking michael buble guy michael buble was is only around the last 20 years she had a whole lifetime prior to that yeah but once you hear mikey bubs mikey bubs don't get me wrong i'm not wrong his voice is like butter dude i'm telling you right now if you can take like a a piece of silk and make it into a human being oh my god that's the bubbles this his voice is like i feel like you could cure me i remember the first time i saw him it was like a 2003 or 2004 like they remember they would do like the christmas tree lighting and it was a big thing people watched on tv i'm sure they still do it but it's not as cool anymore yeah because whitney houston isn't there okay that's the first time i heard they were like and you know here's michael buble mikey boobs and i remember at the time to be like this guy's got something yeah here we go simon cowell over here fucking michael buble one of the most like easiest voices like it sounds like he's not even trying he's like have yourself oh my god damn you had it there you started you should have started i could do one note but that's it that's it i know i know where to stop yo he's the guy's good mikey boobs dude the boob and i'll tell you this though but i'm gonna be honest about mr boobs talk about the boobs it's his christmas stuff that is the hits his otherwise stuff it's okay oh isn't it that's kind of sway sway with me but that's that's a cover what's that doesn't he only do covers no no first of all no one's disrespecting the boob in front of me don't don't let him talk about boob covers don't talk about yeah you're not talking about boob covers yeah mikey boobs but the the christmas album absolutely ridiculous dude and he is one of those people that has done the unthinkable and he has put new christmas music in the stratosphere of like iconic christmas music because most of the christmas music that we like is 70 years old i apologize to the boobs what is a song that he created involving christmas don't fucking disrespect the boobs involving christmas yeah like i see what he's doing he said no you said you he added new i'm saying his version of christmas song so they the covers are so shut up so you're saying the shut the hell up yo you're disrespecting the boob i'm over there and i'll fucking shove that fucking tree in your ass you talk about the boobs like that yeah i like the boobs was just asking a question yo mikey boobs you know what's funny about that christmas album you know the song like santa baby oh yeah when he does it he goes santa buddy because he's not gay he's not gay okay the boobs understands he's not like yeah santa baby because he's not trying to say yo i'm not calling this i'll sing christmas songs but i'm not calling him baby yeah what do you think this you think there were gay people in the 70s i'm fucking mikey boobs i'm not gay mikey boobs santa buddy i'm pretty sure he's married and has a family he seems like a very nice guy let's get that out of the way let's make that very clear i love mikey boobs right to be clear also a cover right you're going down a bad way right now with me you're going down the wrong alleyway and guess what we're the thugs at the end ready to stick up for boobs i think you would meet me in the middle no we'll let you get there so you got a sense well it's our alleyway don't tell us how to operate our alleys yeah we wait you think that you're safe when you have your boob talk out of our alleys you know what i'm saying got it got it got it i just he has done like his versions of christmas songs yeah hold up i'm looking up this album they have gone into like it's very hard to crack into like iconic christmas music and he's one of i would say four modern artists that has done it obviously mariah carey's the other one well she i mean that might be the greatest of all time fucking what's his name beebs overrated what's overrated his christmas music it's it i can't what am i gonna say to that i mean it's just like it's an insane thing to do to say i will say at least his was original you know who has a shady it wasn't was it yeah some of it was you know who has a christmas love banger who cares you know who has an incredible original i think christmas song that is also a big we're big fans of here at the basement yard k clark kelly clarkson bro hit the fucking desk harder and i'll hear jesus yo that song it does there's no lead-in it's just like boom we're off to the race and she just fucking like banger i love slow like nat king cole you know like i love that there's a candle and it's snowing but when you get punched in the mouth by kelly clarkson's vocals yeah nothing is preparing usually christmas music is like more slow and it's like a cozy song and you're laying on the couch whatever but that song's like someone threw a present in your fucking face just like bang christmas slut wait you never answered what's your favorite christmas song oh i i yeah i didn't um also i'm looking up the the track list is it all out to the boob um it's all covers it's pretty much but that doesn't matter the thing that he's done which i think is even more impressive is he's made him he's taken these songs and been like these are mine now yeah these are better than the original version andy williams who's perry como don't think so well hold on any any williams that one it's a banger don't get me wrong don't get me wrong when you hear those bells it's the most yeah i'm like forget it it just it i hear that song and it puts me in like holiday rush mode you know what i'm saying i'm shopping during shopping you know and i'm running around with the bags like this like yeah where are the toys yeah exactly i i'm fully in on the andy williams it's the most wonderful time also we gotta give credit to our girl brenda lee rocking around the christmas tree is quite frankly just an all-timer i feel like it's a little over i think i think i don't wait what what's your favorite christmas song i can see yours being i think i know it yeah i think it's it's the mariah carey no it's not well i mean it's hard to not like that is a great one but like i really like the fucking in sync song merry christmas that's a good one that's even in your top 10 is bananas to me it's a good song what it's a good song it's a hit i wouldn't yeah i don't even think it deserves to be in the fucking sniffing competition you could sniff frank that's not an expression at all it doesn't deserve to be in the sniffing competition what's your favorite christmas song mine doesn't have a good rep right now oh is it maybe it's something outside it's cold outside yeah that is a great song but it is a little sexually aggressive a little yeah a lot of let the girl go home yeah jesus but i will say the version in elf my favorite yeah oh you're going zoe de chanel she kills that bro i love hearing that and even like will ferrell be like no but like no but they do so he does it in the movie but like there's someone that does it like an official cover with her that voice is caramel chocolate i don't know exactly who it is but maybe it's cool i can't even do it proper justice yeah that is a good one it is sexually aggressive so you're getting canceled i do think they redid it i think they redid i mean if they redid this song it should be baby it's cold outside i really can't say okay let me call you a cab or okay let me escort you home he's just like no come here what's in this drink yeah oh what is that about yeah it's not great it's really not great say what's in this drink it's like it's cold come on she's like why is my drink fizzing it's like it's cold it's freezing what's that tab at the bottom of my drink and he's just like it's so i love that he wasn't even backing down from like it's cold like it's just cold outside like that's the only thing yeah like that's all he could think of was like i i it do you not understand it's freezing and then he tries to like find other ways to like work that in where he's just like it's up to your knees out there like you're not even gonna be able to make it home dude first of all if the snow is up to my knees out there i'm going out there oh you think i'm not making a snow angel dude when's the last time you played in the snow every year really like you go out and play what is playing in the snow like roll around jump around throw snowballs i'm rolling really i'm rolling for you i'm glad you're that's more like me than like you how can that be because you are more like when it snows outside i need to open my emails and talk about bottom line and gross margins the thing is you don't know me at all as clearly no i know you quite well oh and i'm oh i'm frank i'm the quirky guy so i go and i shut the fuck up you're damn right i'm the quirky guy joey's fucking i'm looking up songs right now you know what sucks dude that song i don't even know if it's a christmas song it's oh it is a christmas song war is over i mean that's john lennon yeah why oh well because he starts up well so is christmas that's fire that boy have you done hate the rest of the song though i mean i will say the only bruce springsteen song that i like is his version oh that's good that's a good one yeah no bruce springsteen dude that's my favorite he's like hey man yeah clarence you got santa claus gonna bring a new saxophone all right man you better good man yeah and he's just like you better watch out oh you better watch out it is better not cry it's god damn it's the only good bruce springsteen song i will go out and say that on the record and i'm gonna get killed in jersey yeah that's fucking crazy that you think that i mean what's what's better than that what's i don't know what's better what is good glory days he's just screaming that's a great song vague who cares what's the other bruce song that born to run born to run born in the usa first of all those are all this is really good yo born to run is so good mid mid mid no it's not born run is unbelievable it's just him hey listen it's pretty good i gotta be careful if i'm pretty good yeah you're honestly you're on a you're on a vocal hit this morning i don't know what's happening i am going to get some shit for my springsteen slander he lives like i think like 25 minutes from where i am he will come over here you know what that means no no property taxes no his property taxes are way is we're in the hundred frank you don't know this song you scared the fuck out of me right here sorry i got mad excited because i saw the words right there you don't know this song probably because it's it's a it's like it's a christmas song by ariana grande oh i know it since it be me that is it but that's that's probably like my favorite christmas song right now i blast that song that i was talking about miles with that song this morning he was just like wait she sings too and i was like she's the total package holy shit he's like oh that's crazy that people don't know ariana grande is saying well he's he's only he's only 10 yeah you know he really only knows her from wicked and i was like yeah she acted then she sang and now she's back to acting and i'm sure she'll do singing again uh but uh i can't i mean clear i can't hit the whistle though she's a pop anomaly let's make it very clear she's not very grande i will say that she's very she's very pequeña yeah you know she is but i what were you gonna say um i don't know okay was i gonna say something i don't know so i would say that like modern christmas songs these are my top five modern christmas songs that have broken into being all-time hits okay mariah carey all i want for christmas is you duh is that modern was that 92 i mean i hot take hot take what hot take what though that it's old or that it's like what god here we go hot take what that song's kind of overrated now that song kind of sucks joey call the gunsmith ask him to fashion two guns we can brandish that shoot a hundred i'm gonna call the north pole and put you on the naughty list you fucking piece of shit first the mikey boobs and now this what what do you like not much kill him get out of there i'm calling the bomb company we're calling 1-800-BOMB yeah hey bombs bombs.com bombs away bombs bombs rs make one for ant i just i think all i want for christmas is you sure anything by michael buble the boobs we could put the instinct song in there it's not my favorite but i could see its appeal it's it's yeah uh the ariana grande whatever it is santa tell me sure and uh kelly clarkson it's a it's just a it's a stupid it's a good day today you're gonna need i got goosies what i got goosies give me one christmas song you like it's beginning to look a lot like christmas it's beginning dude you know who has a banger of a christmas album too who is that uh is that is that andy that might be perry como i mean i'm sure all of them did a version of it uh but elvis got some bangers bro am i the only one that sees elvis and i go who liked that dude horny teens in the 50s i know but i'm like i'm like listening to him but i'm like what is this no he's he's got some he's got some songs that i could see the appeal to that's what i'm hearing it's it's just clearly he stole the sound from chuck berry did it himself and everyone the music industry was just like a white man doing it and they're like now we love it it's bing crosby okay oh yeah bing yeah we talked about it yeah we talked about it there's some stuff there with all these guys any single one any sort of white person who's singing a really good song and it's filmed in black and white i'm like all right and i mean we need to look into this let's just look anyone i would say that 90 of them pre-1999 you know it's a red flag for me when it's black and white and the white people are holding a skinny microphone i'm like oh like the lawrence welk show but they're just like just just look into that because there has to be there might have been some stuff with bob barker too he kept that skinny microphone to the end well that one's extra skinny that one was super no they all had some skinny dick well the ones that are like and it's like a little pop yeah dude it's like a you know like a q-tip all right so the crux of this episode which we were getting to because we could talk christmas music all day is we decided that as we were doing these christmas trees holiday trees if you feel attacked by us i know how much aunt hates that uh we decided we were gonna bring in some ornaments and decorate them yeah it's the santa gato studios basement yard way we spread cheer laying on thick right velvety okay like the silky sounds of the michael boobs yeah mikey boob blay uh so damn let's get him on the show and have him just serenade us i would do a whole episode with just michael boobla singing to us i will throw an episode away to do that yeah just have him stand right there and whenever he feels like it sing well and i'll just shut up he's got to sing cool stuff if he starts throwing out like the religious christmas songs i'm off bro little drummer boy what is that who cares even who cares about this little kid that could play the draw yo you know what's a banger noel that i actually know well oh wait no not noel not that there's another song that i'm like no oh it's it's it's another one in elf at the end the song what's uh uh what's it called it's like not real words i don't know she's on the piano like james kahn's playing the piano she's singing it oh my god i just watched it oh yeah we just watched it the other day too now i can't i know what you're pink panther is here coach and spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together and they want you to be part of it grab your friends and head to the tabby tour hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists exclusive experiences and personalized products and discover custom playlists on spotify but just for you based on who you are and how you listen live your story with coach learn more at coach.com like literally the end credits oh that there's those are real words i mean they're like not though it is that was good old lane sign see what i'm saying the - That shit is worse when it ain't worse. All lanes sign. It's literally it's that's what it's called. It sounds like a board game. That's stupid. It sounds like Latin Probably what are the words? What are the actual words like pig Latin? Is pig Latin being say is they say? Probably Rob Stewart Rod Stewart Rob Oh Rob No, no, no, it is Rod Rod Rod Stewart Maggie Mae Rob Stewart Didn't you say his dad said that he had he was filled with some stuff. My dad said, yeah, you're dead That's what I'm saying. They pumped a bunch of cc's of jizz at it. Yeah in a hospital. I'm like, I'm not even gonna Listen to what you're saying. I Was in the hospital also started that with did you hear about Rod Stewart dad? At that point I was in my 20s. No, no, I know two songs Are you gonna tell us the words? Know that it's Auld Lang Syne. It's yeah, it's it's that and then it goes into like Auld Lang Syne. My dear Auld Lang Syne Yeah, it was Auld Lang Syne. I believe it's like an it's a Scottish poem Scottish. Oh, can't don't fuck with the Scottish They'll beat the brakes off of us. No one's doing that Oh, I like looked into it because I remember hearing that song and being like wow I love this song so much for some reason and then I was like I wonder what the words are because I can't you know Sometimes you hear a song and you're like, I don't know what that part and like it's it could be anything Yeah, then I looked it up and I was like, oh, it's what I thought it was. It's just it's just not real I would love to hear like a Scottish Christmas song or like a Christmas song sang in Scottish Give me a second. Give me one. Give me one and I could because I know it would be just very loud Yeah, probably jingle bells jingle bells them fucking bells are jangling. They're done it jingle bells or jangle bells Jingle the fucking way Oh, man God damn it. I love Christmas. So yeah, it means old like old times old for old times sake stupid. Ah, okay All right, so we brought in some ornaments each of us to decorate our trees. Yeah And we're gonna go and we're gonna show them and we're gonna hang them up and I think in true basement yard fashion They're probably gonna be a little ridiculous First one I have It's a it's a cheeto But it's got Danny DeVito's face And it's a day need to cheeto that is let's really orange It's it this looks like it was 3d printed. Is it tastes good? Yeah Not edible not edible. That's cool Danny DeVito icon dude. He's like 80 Fuck off. He's getting up there dude. Danny DeVito is not 80. I think he is. Oh, I think he's getting out of him Morgan Freeman Al Pacino Robert De Niro Chino looks 80 He's like 80 since he was 50 He was 50. Yeah to be fair 81. Oh Danny DeVito's 81 yeah, fuck out of here, bro. I tell you what for someone his size Don't bring that up. You are on fuck. You are skidding on thin ice and you're about to fall into the lake What is wrong? It's like, you know, they say really first you attack boobs. Now you're attacking Danny DeVito. Yeah, I want let me Tell you something of him. Let me tell you something. I love Danny DeVito. You're fucking Cruisin for a bruising at the end of our alleyway Okay, cuz we're thugs we're thugs. Okay. Um, that's really cool I like 81, huh? You like Cheetos? I don't have a cheese doodle for being honest I know I only fuck with the puff. I fuck with those fuck puffs - I really like to crunch you I want some hips behind my Cheetos. I want it like yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I want this thing to like pack a punch Sometimes I like to shove two into my mouth like I'm at the dentist and then yes, I do that and then I punch my cheek Okay, that one you're doing by yourself. No, no, no, you guys don't do that. Not a shared experience. Really? Yeah, I threw up a full Cheetos puff once I threw up cheat I threw up cheese doodles in pre-k all over the floor Wait, what'd you do? What did you do? I threw up a full Cheetos puff once I threw him up you didn't eat it You didn't you didn't chew it. I have a suspicion that it formed a Cheeto back in my stomach. Okay, what? Your suspicion is so wildly inaccurate my bro I have a suspicion that that that science and physics put it back together You think your stomach is just cooler than everyone else's stomach regular ass stomach bro. Imagine if you did throw up Full thing I mean that that happens with like I know people that have like thrown up pills and they've come out full pills still Cuz they take a time. That's not what I'm saying at all He's saying like throwing up like you eat a steak that it comes back a t-bone That would be kind of cool actually Alright Danny De Cheeto, I kind of love that. Yeah, that's a nice color pop. Yeah, and it's a good-looking DeVito. Yeah. All right I'm gonna start Great year incredible year, but I have noticed that one of the most regular Inclusions in any grocery order that we have is pickles. So that's why I have this which is a Christmas tree made of pickles Mmm, it's just such a pickle year. I think pickles are having a resurgence. I brought back Hawaiian shirts I brought back the word laborious. I do think that I am slowly bringing back pickles for the world youth. Okay What that's why is your other hand below the desk? I don't like that Okay, because I didn't know if there was something going on. I mean, there's some other stuff going on I'm sure I got some other stuff just in the pickles man, bro. We get pickles So much like Every order we do it's stacked with pickles What is stacked with pickles? Costco sized pickle jars and we get the grill oh go into our mouths brother No, no, where can it be stored into the fridge? My brother you could fit a giant jar here for it's like this Yeah, and it's the grill owes pickles. Are those are those full or they slice their slice? I do get their half sours though, and I do, you know, I love pickles member at the old studio. Yeah, I'd get pickles all time Yeah, I'm like watching you eat a pickle. That is the interesting thing my days of consuming pickles have Changed my previous days. Okay, I used to I used to be a little sexually aggressive just like that song Yeah, it was now instead of the full pickle at once you take bites No, he like he sucks the pickle dry and I know that sounds like I'm trying to make a joke But he literally would like suck. Yeah, so what I know there was no moisture Yeah, what I would do is I'd turn it into a praising which is naturally A pickle raisin right and it I would bite the top off and I would I would literally I can't do this Suck it like yeah, you suck it until it's dry. I I would I would you'd suck it rotten Can you take it back one for my step? I feel like I'm not being that crazy I think you're being a little crazy and sucking something rotten. Well, I I think that's a that's a nice one. It's good I like it. Do you have ornaments - I do. Oh nice cool bag. Oh Um, I don't know if they're all gonna fit on the tree. I got one and I realized how big it was, right? so this is a ornament That hey aunt. Yep What the hell is that? Yeah, so it's a it's stuck here. Give me a second It's a mermaid reindeer holding a gift that looks kind of similar to wow. That does kind of look like Joey What the fuck did you make that? I did not. Yes, you did You want to come see it? I need to get close to this guy. What do you got rattling over there? Why am I? Why am I? Oh, he's stuck. Oh, you're real stuck I'm wrapped up! Would you like to see? Dude, what the hell? I don't know. That is pretty Can you see this? Wait, what did you type into Amazon? That is uncanny Weird ornaments and it's a mermaid It's a Christmas mermaid wearing a scarf with reindeer You almost knocked over your tree by the way You sat down and it was fucking Horizontal Oh, there it goes. We're fine The Cheetos hanging. The Cheeto is good Um, kind of looks like you. Yeah, it does Also, it's the size of your tree That's the problem. That is a big ornament What's that made out of? Is it hollow? Brother How much was that? It looks like it was $40 It was about $33 How much? $33 Dude, that's a lot of money to spend on a joke ornament We're also That's out of your pocket Well, this one looks like This one looks like you. I feel like it'd be out of This is unbelievable. Oh, wait We're getting reimbursed for our purchased ornaments Frank, it's a pickle Pickle ornament I think it's beautiful That's insane. That's big, dude Oh, of course, he got little tree, big ornament He's overcompensating For his tree. That's the biggest one I have It's huge It's way too big. It's the biggest one I've ever seen Needlessly. Yeah, honestly, that is the biggest Outside of like the stars that go on top Which I didn't bring any. I didn't bring any either Oh, I forgot that. You would hate the star That we had on top of our tree for years I already know what it is. What is it? Is it the same one as Espo? Which one is it? Which one is it? It's like the Super Mario star? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it was. Children Okay, um, we do Let's, before we get to the rest of the ornaments here Uh, we do have some Sponsors for the show. The first one being How you doing Zoc Doc? Okay, so Don't forget that during This holiday season you also want to Be healthy, be happy A lot of people going into the new year also Um, you know, they start doing their New Year's resolutions and they want to be healthier And whatnot, but you should go to the doctor And get your checkup, your yearly checkup Um, but yeah, so Zoc Doc, it's a free app and website where you can Search and compare high quality and networked doctors And click instantly to book an appointment So, this is a website that i used when i was off my mother's insurance you go onto the website you put in your insurance and the area that you're in and then you can look up doctors in your area and it's not just primary care physicians it's you know dermatologists or whatever you need there's specialists there and you can see that they are patient reviewed so you know you find people that have a really good rating i believe it's out of five and you say okay i'll go to that doctor for this thing and when their next available appointment is which is usually within seven 72 hours sometimes it's been you know the next day a lot of the times honestly for me it's been the next day so it's a great place to book all your appointments so uh yeah like i said it's a free app and website so go check it out uh stop putting off those doctor's appointments go to zocdoc.com basement okay that is zocdoc.com basement spelled z-o-c-d-o-c dot com slash basement so uh get your checkups folks um we also have rocket money which is an all-in-one personal finance app that is going to put money back in your pocket by finding and canceling your unwanted subscriptions um you know you just plug in your information there and it'll have all your stuff and you can cancel these things that maybe you signed up for accidentally or you didn't realize that you were paying for something or you realize you know what i'm i haven't used this in six months why am i paying for this let me cancel that it's the holidays put that money back 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to save yourself some money you're going to be one of the growing amounts of patrons that we have here continuing to break records thank you guys so much and it's well worth it i think don't take my word for it take this eyewitness testimony whoever's editing this put in the eyewitness testimony just put in something like someone saying it's yeah uh so there you go you saw you heard from that person in particular so go check it out patreon.com slash the basement we love you and we'll catch you on the flippity flop all right we'll catch you on the flip all right so i have to add the the ribbon you need to add the ring i didn't i didn't do this pot oh my god um this one is a heavy hitter here uh heavy hitter in what regards this is a thickless cage it's nicholas cage on a thick girl's body it's backwards it's backwards there you go there you go there it is there's thickless cage yo yeah oh wait is that his face from con air um i hope um but yeah that was a great movie dude you know what's so funny that you say that what you know it is so funny that you have that ornament you know who texted me in the wee hours of the night last night nicholas cage could you imagine no hank green oh yeah he texted me yesterday yeah he goes joe shared your number sorry i didn't send you ducks here's a duck and it was nicholas cage not as a duck and he goes oh fuck sorry and it's just another picture of nicholas cage and he's like oh shit and i responded that's not a duck that's a goat wow that's a good one dude hank green nicholas cage so you just have a celebrity filled celebrity film christmas tree that's all he that's all he wants that's all he needs favorite nick cage movie god um damn you know what i just watched national treasure on a plane it's so good it's good man it is so good i really like that movie what's the one with the green the green balls oh that's the rock those green balls look sick is that with uh sean connery yeah yeah michael bay that's about what's it called breaking out of or breaking into alcatraz alcatraz yeah let's put nikki up here oh you're getting nick thickless cage right in the middle thicker than a bowl of oatmeal i'll tell you that yeah that's crazy i saw someone recently said thicker than zoo glass that's great that's a good one okay well listen i'd be remiss if i didn't bring in something from my childhood and i had to and i know i previously brought this up but this was mine when i was a child it's a skateboarding dinosaur and now that i look at it i have the wrong one this is my brother's where's mine that's not your brother that's yours it says sun 1994 on the on the on the back oh okay wait do you have all of your your skating dinosaurs i guess i have i guess or have you just had this one forever i've had this one to be like this is mine and now that i see it's 94 maybe it's my brother's it cannot be or maybe or maybe they just got it to me in two years old yeah regardless he's a skating dinosaur with a backwards cap which is so cool and a pink backpack which at the time not ideal yeah you know but look he's hip he's fly he's got a bit of childlike wonder and he's balance on his really rad skateboard that's cute i think it really captures my joy and happiness yeah it you don't look like it i think i can look like it what you can't um the building's great i like it the building is on its way down yeah hagrid just got here what was that um it's just you know this is this is a family in alvarez family relic and this will last forever nice and if it ever gets thrown out i will haunt any of my ancestors that have done that i'm sure you will that seems like on par for you don't say it like that what if people throw stuff out i believe it all right i was i was looking at the uh my feet over here the arms on this thing look great in this lighting nice just saying yeah you're horny um all right what else you got i had one that looks like joe so i thought i'd get one that looks like frankie i have it penny wise oh you wow why do i look like it what am i looking at i can't even see it why is the balloon in front of his face that's a little bit that's how he stands a little bit oh that's right ready to float not bad that was pretty good not bad dude i don't think you look like this i i figured it was a joke okay um although bill skarsgård actually i know what i think about it he's got big eyes got big eyes dude that whole family bill alex bro they can sell and see dude can see those guys they can see yeah and they can act let me tell you yeah like a family of actors good for them uh i have you seen you've seen it movies right joey yeah um i only saw the first one it was the second one was a little disappointing personally well it's a little crazy too they took some stuff out of those books that i'm glad they took out do you know about the books aunt you know about the books yeah well they had to take out that yeah so i'm not stephen king's a weird dude stephen king was clearly on cocaine for several decades and uh when the kids get out of the tunnel yeah when they get out of the tunnel after they defeat it in the first part of the book they thought that to defeat it they needed to grow up and not be kids anymore yes so they all practice having sex with the one female member of the losers club he's writing these about excuse me he's writing this about 10 year olds i don't know if i didn't know frankie was just going to hammer it there but i mean i don't think any way to describe it is any worse than the actual what it is i had no idea that was part of the thing yeah it didn't really work it didn't yeah i don't think that would have been green it absolutely did not work yeah he ended up coming back right well i got this one for him oh that's just what is this this one's for you bud thank you you got one from it thank you yeah no that's just is that mickey it is it was i'll be honest with you i got this as a joke and i'm looking at it and i don't like it now you feel bad about it yeah i do you i'm not you have a full-on what's with this what's that that's like on the things like they have like little red things on them to like snap it oh that's the crank yeah i'm sure it's just like a design thing yeah i don't like this anymore it's kind of mean well it has to go on your tree now yeah now you have to put it up there you have to now you have to declare that you are a murdering psychopath in the back of the tree well she fell is it like a good quality it looks like a good quality ornament is it heavy yeah it's kind of heavy all right what do you got okay well i also went the route that this one uh it's got some bells on it so it's festive okay uh and it says go ahead jingle my bells frank is that am i looking at a ass i think those are balls brother what am i looking at but what am i looking at uh it's yes that's an ass and underneath those are supposed to be the bells wow i just think like you know it's playful it's fun it's happy yeah it's like it's like a go ahead like this is what i expect to see on the back of like a ford f-150 right during christmas time and now it's on your and also a punisher logo right that's clearly taken out of context because people don't understand that the punisher actually didn't like corrupt people all right uh but yeah go ahead it's it's it's wood okay oh thank god i can't put this up on my tree at home that's for sure there will be questions there will be questions i just thought it was a cute little way to say like hey you don't like me fuck you right this is the appropriate setting for that i would think so yeah well i mean i killed disney yeah you have a full-on murder scene on yours yeah and ant has what i can only imagine is the how he goons over you as a merman um what are we doing i brought it in well if he's going balls you're going gingerbread i told you i had it yeah it's an interesting one this is what i'm doing yeah how do you youtube it's all right it's a gingerbread say again youtube it's a ginger oh they probably i mean yeah i hope they don't they don't know what this is i mean we got balls and now i don't think and anthropomorphic characters like animated characters are going to get us into a ton of trouble right you couldn't say animated you didn't want to say that what was the reasoning behind anthropomorphic that's not even i don't think anthropomorphic i don't even know what it means um this is pretty prominent yeah who's who's and and for some reason the balls keep turning toward me and i don't like that so we're gonna just gonna put them the the balls yearn for you baby all right the balls just they're attracted to me i guess all right what else do i got in my bag whose is worse ants full-on intercourse happening on his tree or mine which is just like a little haha innuendo i mean we don't know um maybe into the mic i don't know so this one very easy obviously it's very basement oh yeah wiener moby oh i love it that's a good one dude put a wiener on there dude get your wiener out come on joey's got a wiener on his tree i got balls on mine and ant has where both of them go the sex one oh yeah i was like don't talk about that i didn't even think of that dude when's the last time you had a hot dog it's been a minute i mean obviously it's december oh yeah obvious okay so i'm gonna ask last week oh yeah do you count sausage no right because unless they're tallie and hot dogs no no you don't you don't you don't you don't buy that what was the occasion uh sunday got it it was the lord's day and daddy needed a dog let me tell you wow what are you what are you finagling i have to put in another ribbon for my next one oh also oscar meyer those are good dogs oscar meyer nathan's some good dogs the only ornament i bought was the joe as a mermaid the rest of the ones are all these all go on my tree oh my god that's insane okay you put that actual one on your tree that's insane yeah but when sometimes it's in the back of the tree got it okay well my next one might be a little infuriating for some people but why do we confine to the the limits the limits that big christmas puts on what is and what isn't an ornament nay i say an ornament should be something that you want to proudly figure uh uh excuse me proudly and prominently feature on your tree so yes these are all technically ornaments sure but an ornament that i have that will be going on my tree is jeff hardy okay now yeah sure he doesn't have traditional ornament build but it's it's a tree should be representative of its owner and i am i if i am nothing i am a wrestling fan so jeff hardy is going to be going to swanton bomb off the top of my tree frank i know you think this is going to piss me off but i love it really it's jeff hardy oh i didn't think you were going to like it i thought you would for sure be pissed off and be like that's not an ornament no i love jeff hardy the top of the tree in the shot i mean he's got to be on the top he's on the top rope it definitely won't be in the shot but all right so then i'll put him where he's ready to do swanton hey so jeff hardy man that's great i mean that's that's a wwe legend yeah you know king of the swanton right and fishnets yeah and humping the air very aggressively also was the reason why i bought a necklace once and it cut me so i had to take the hardy logo necklace the sharpest thing i've ever had in my life my brother wore it playing basketball and it went through a kid's finger see yeah it was fucking bro did you ever see you were not a big wrestling fan back in the day right not really did you ever see the hardy boys logo probably in passing dude look at me but it's like it's fucked and it's sharp dude look it up and you're gonna see like this was on kids necklaces and this was like die-casted metal so it was like it was hard it was not it was like that dude but the but the edges of it were so sharp dude and it like cut me once and my mom made me take it off yeah dude those things were not that one that wasn't the one we had it was just silver and it was like a beaded low i mean we don't need to fucking pull it up it was like beaded yeah dude it was it was not it definitely looks sharp it is it's not that one but it's like that purple one right just type in the necklace just type it necklace gotcha it was it was it definitely had some edges to it neck lace there you go the first one yeah yeah the thing was sharp as fuck dude it looks pretty rounded in this photo it's not doing it justice killed me it's not doing it justice this one looks sharp this this one yeah it wasn't that one no well that has a beaded necklace too yeah it could have been that well regardless this thing almost killed me but i think my tree wouldn't be who i am and who i feel i am if it didn't have some wrestling on it you're not jeff hardy oh i'm closer to jeff hardy than you are that's ridiculous how is that ridiculous you think you're closer to being jeff hardy than me who do you think has done more whispers in the wind you or me me i've swung time all i do is swanton you've done a 101 at swanton but i would do a lot of poetry and motions with my brothers i that's it that's a matt hardy thing that's me dude you don't know who jeff hardy is don't look at his mugshot you don't know jeff hardy no i didn't say that i was just trying to compare oh i was about to freak out i mean if we're going based off looks sure it's joey twinkie boy but if we're going based off of just general vibe and i'm more of a like a he kind of looks like a like a a vampire he could be if jeff hardy was a vampire i would not be astonished no he wouldn't be able to wear this cross here yeah that's true it would hurt him also it would hurt him of the two of us you are way more likely to wear fishnets than i am i'll give you that i will give you that all right what do you got i have a resin twisted tea bottle cap well obviously yeah i talked about this as well i believe i brought this in just you know some proof that's nice maybe put that one did you make that did you drink the teas yourself no i bought this oh on etsy yep you could have made that you guys are pretty handy around your house i don't know how to do a resins thing yeah have you ever made did you guys have the beer the beer wall like the wall that was just like the cutout boxes i wasn't in a frat like if it's more fratty housey but your life is fracked what are you talking about yeah but i gotta live i can't they didn't give them they didn't give them the letters but they gave them everything else i walked into ann's house one time and there was a contraption that like you pour a giant bottle of fucking jameson yeah i see that like the like the the wheelchair for it right yeah well it's not a wheelchair but like it's like like a hand truck like what yeah yes i hear what you're saying i was gonna say something that probably would have upset people but yeah well that's nice wait did you so you bought that i bought this yes i'm gonna well i well this was i bought this like four years ago i'm gonna ask nice i think it was like 30 something pink panther is here coach and spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together and they want you to be part of it grab your friends and head to the tabby tour hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists exclusive experiences and personalized products and discover custom playlists on spotify but just for you based on who you are and how you listen live your story with coach learn more at coach.com bucks yo bro the budget you have that is crazy might have been 18 you could have made that for how could might have been 18 it's such an exact number how does back loading expenses work he doesn't what does that mean like he's gonna charge me for this oh it does work yes you can thank you thank you frankie comes out it comes out of somewhere joe's like try it um i'll move the sex thing okay no leave the sex one up this one because your tree tells i'm sorry i don't mean to cut you off your tree tells a story so what it is is someone saw a mermaid and was so horned up they drank a bunch of twisted teas and had sex we could tell a better story uh all right my next one i have just a cute raccoon covered in christmas lights because they're cute and he's doing the rock on oh that sucks no it does i hate raccoons don't be a bastard i'm not being a bastard but if i had a gun i'd shoot your tree you hate animals i don't hate animals oh i love a little cereal killery when it comes first of all the only cereal that i'm killing is cinnamon toast crunch second of all let's call up the joke fucking master and tell him his jokes fucking getting someone's down here telling jokes i thought it was quick and witty i thought it was perfect i don't hate animals i hate raccoons because they're little fucking mongers i hate raccoons because they're little fucking mongers i just don't like that you're so chaotic and stupid and ugly frank this is objectively adorable i did see something that you're gonna be pumped about there's research to suggest that raccoons are becoming like slowly more domesticated which means we can have them as pets talk that talk because i'll get one in here you think i won't get one i'm letting you know if you get a raccoon in here i'm putting it in the trash can and it'll be chilling i will lock the trash can and then put it on the stove top and this is where we're getting to serial killer you're a serial killer the only serial that i've killed is apple jacks love that's a great one that was that i mean it is cute hey cute guy covered in lights but if you saw that in real life that exact real thing if you can guarantee that a raccoon doesn't have rabies i'm hugging it get the hell out of here they're just a little it's a little it's literally a little rat so are you how you like that you're not allowed to call hispanic people rats joey that's what your fucking your parole officer told you no more what do you got all right listen i'm sticking with family heirlooms okay i like this tree to be representative of me where i've come from you've said this every round and where i am going and nothing helps me keep a humble happy and optimistic playful approach to life than remembering my first love on this planet and my first love on this planet was barney the dinosaur wow now barney the dinosaur was not only one of my first loves but he's ice skating that's fire and barney the dinosaur i loved him so much did you oh my god it was a big barney guy really big but now that he's being festive and skating yeah makes me love him more and this when i see this it reminds me of being a child being a child humble beginnings life joy you know you don't need materialistic goods in order to to to find happiness true you could just go back to the days of barney the purple dinosaur right barney is a dinosaur from our imagination that's a song and what's more beautiful than that it's good so that's why i put barney on my tree that's a good one i like that a lot you better i can't even be nice without being yelled at it's insane no it's cute i like that one what do you got those balls are staring right at me um i have a little mario kart yeah one and he's waving the checkered flag assuming that he's won i believe hey i have a couple mario kart ones at home too really this one was sent to me it was very nice what was sent to you what mario is it mario it's mario what kart is he on pipe frame pipe frame kart standard standard standard pipe frame kart yep yep you guys know the names of my karts not a lot of weight to that good drifting good drifting but not a lot of weight not a lot of acceleration you need some you need some more you know we know who the meta is birdo well no you want to go with a heavier character from what i believe last time i brought in mario kart and we played i think joe beat you frankie uh i don't even remember that i guarantee though if we were to play again i would i would smoke him i am putting up i would put up a a substantial bet well oh we can the reason why i won it was because of uh it was like you had the cheating rc's on yeah he had the cheating rc's on wait what the like rc tail that you can't fall off the mat yeah i did which i didn't know i don't even know what that is but what the fuck is that like you can't fall off so you can't fall off so you're telling me i think he had it as well though am i bugging i don't know but we definitely didn't tell him you had it and it was funny watching you win oh you got the rc tail i was like what is that so you're judging his victory over me based off of him cheating i wasn't cheating i didn't turn it on if i can quote joey from 2020 stop the steal let's play again and i will absolutely beat him whoop his ass absolutely recount the votes the stars oh that that is a good one do you have any do either you guys have any that like make sounds or like lights or anything on your tree um like in real life or today in real life uh no to both i don't know why i even asked that i don't know that one that i actually uh told you about where it's like the crib or whatever there is a button on the bottom but i feel like it broke like years ago but it used to like sing a song they used to have ones that you could plug into the lights like i remember my mom that was that was like that yeah my mom used to have one of those what about you do you have any that make sounds or lights no no you yes i do i have a couple video game ones like i have a donkey kong cabinet that you press the button and it does the song and then i have a super nintendo that does super mario world nice it is very cool super excited well before we go a little further here we do have some more sponsors the first one being skims okay skims is uh a lovely company that is uh making you know underwear for the boys and for the girls they got stuff for girls as well but uh i have a lot of skims underwear they sent us a couple of pairs to try out and they are honestly like my favorite underwear they're very comfortable uh they're very breathable they don't like hold in a bunch of moisture or anything like that so you take it off you're like what's going on here um but they are extremely breathable they're amazing um they're not too tight but they also like are tight enough to you know keep everything where it should be um but they have lovely stuff for this upcoming holiday i think this is a great gift i actually bought my friend last year my secret stana i got some skims underwear for him so this is also a great gift to get for the holidays so you could shop skims men's at skims men's.com let them know that we sent you after you place your order select podcast in the survey and select our show in the drop down menu that follows and if you're looking for the perfect uh gifts this season the skims holiday shop is now open for business okay so go to skims.com and uh yeah let them know that we sent you and uh get yourself something maybe or you know and get your little fella something as well um and lastly we have squarespace squarespace is going to be the platform where you're going to build your website and they're going to kind of handle everything from there honestly so if you want to get your little fella something as well um and lastly we have squarespace where you can get your little fella something as well if you have a e-commerce business or you make content or something and a website is very important okay all the websites that we have made are powered by squarespace it's the best in my opinion they have templates that make it very easy to get to a starting point so you just click on this template it populates a website you switch some things out and you're kind of good to go we've done it in a day turned it around and we're good to go uh but they also have a lot of tools that are going to help you optimize your traffic let you know where things are all the analytics everything like that so they got your covered and you can get started on your own website uh when you go to squarespace.com slash basement and you will save 10 off your first purchase of a website or a domain okay so that is squarespace.com slash basement and you will save 10 off your first purchase of a website or a domain all right so get to it and then send me your website i want to see it all right how many do you guys have left i have i have dosh i have one all right and uh so how about i go and then and then we'll come back around we get snake draft nope do you have two left or just i have two oh okay so then why yeah why don't you you you me you me you me do that yeah so uh my another one i have is the green frog wearing glasses from the rainforest cafe this dude loves this tree is so you dude this is so you that's a good there's a big joe in here yeah that's that's that's not you it is it is by ratio kind of more joe than him it's true i'm trying to catch up to how much joe this tree you should put it over his face no it's too big yeah put it up here dude can i ask you where did this obsession with the rainforest cafe come from how did that start hmm it's a good question probably circa 2004 circa is crazy dude just tell us that circa uh the animal kingdom and disney we would always eat at the rainforest cafe there's a rainforest cafe there yep i guess that makes a ton of sense still there we go all the time not all the time is there food it's good enough what does that mean the atmosphere is fun the atmosphere is what you go for the animatronic rubber would you ever go to like an actual rainforest does that no no way you just like the cafe i got my fill at the cafe right dude rainforests are terrifying yeah they're very scary i would i'd that would not be fun to go to do you like nature nope so what about it is appealing you love that it's that it's nature adjacent it is by definition absolutely not i also love an outdoor indoor love an outdoor what does that mean an indoor that looks like outdoor oh like a tree inside a restaurant yeah an indoor outdoor dude you would have loved i built a restaurant with my dad once that was based off of a garbage dump you would have loved it it was yeah built a restaurant yeah well my dad used to do that shit all the time now he can't because his knees look like spaghettios his dad worked construction got it but like it seemed like him and his dad hammer nailed this restaurant together no that is exactly what happened you and your dad yes i know there was more people involved of course there were more people but like we did most of it well i'm saying i think there's a construction company no my dad like was like it was a not big crew because if my dad was doing it on the side like basurero basurero it's in is it still there yeah is it still there it's on steinway if anyone right that's the corner right there you've been there i've never been in there oh i've eaten there several times it's good yeah yeah it's good colombian food go and touch the walls my dad and i built that chances are if you touch the walls go and touch the wall you're touching 2005 frank's hands and they were huge dude oh the biggest big hands they were just big fat hands yeah non-dainty right really really meaty hands all right what do you got i got i think you're going to love for star wars that's why i got santa oh stuck in the carbonite and that's pretty cool it's like from from uh return of the jedi and the vampire strikes back you see you know what happens of course you know han solo i love you i know i used to love watching his face like when when it it's like uh melting or whatever yeah i was like oh it's so cool i love when princess leia would like get dressed up in like in return of the jedi and she'd be like yes yeah yeah i remember exactly how she sounded but you know what i'm saying i know so it's it's him if you guys don't know star wars um get to it let me tell you the original trilogy let me tell you don't listen to like fox news talk about it just watch it for yourself i really feel like people who go back and watch stuff like star wars but like i'm gonna watch it in the actual order so that's a real like topic of like contention that i recently went through because miles and i started watching it last year star wars yeah what if you were to show your child yeah little walrus yeah wants to watch star wars daddy show me star wars what is the what is the order at which you're showing them the order in which they came out really i think there is a magic to like oh this is this is a prequel like that adds something you know like there's like callbacks there but you don't get any of that if you just watch it like you're gonna start at like what the attack of the columbus movie sucks by the way phantom menace is the first one canonically actually rogue one um yeah but like what you would start with rogue one that's bananas sorry rogue one is not canonically i i'm so sorry i mean yeah it can't be but like whatever it is it's like that that would be so stupid to do so what a lot of people do and i was thinking this might be the way that i so we started with one and then we went to two and then we went to three what is one phantom menace you did do this so we did that however i think re in revisiting them i thought more about phantom menace because i think re in revisiting them i thought more about it will do what people do is four five i don't know the numbers four is new hope five is empire strikes back and then they do one two three six seven eight nine i would just watch a minute what's the point of doing that because i mean if you watch one two and three it spoils a big part of a big reveal wait so you make all of the original ones prequels no so you watch four and then five and then you go back and watch phantom men four and five are one and two you got to give titles all right new hope yeah but new hope is one is episode four no it's episode four it's the first one that came out this is what i'm saying what's the one that came out with ray seven eight nine got it uh force awakens new uh force awakens last jedi and uh last sky or skywalker who cares not good i don't care but i think it kind of ruins one of the big reveals if you watch one if you do four five six like it resonates better and then i don't know i don't think it ruins anything i mean they they put it out that way so everyone knew going in i mean they didn't put it out that way with the hindsight like they did it and they were just like let's make prequels now yeah i can't grab the ornament i just i'm like i don't know i just okay all right well that's my that's my i feel like that story is too all over the place it's gotten a little out of hand um do i go yeah i go you got your last one yeah my last one and you know i don't know it's nicholas cage again it's just a flat nicholas cage why what is going why do you have several nicholas cage ornaments you know i as i'm staring at it this is actually freaking me out i don't know why i don't even i'm not even a huge nicholas cage fan per se i think if you if you if you like the bird you like the cage you know what i'm saying nope so how and why nicholas cage um i just think it's funny it reminds me of the nickelodeon remember face didn't you have that nicholas cage pillow back in the day that was a gift i did have it what the fuck is happening what is going on with you who gave me that do you have like a spiritual connection to nicholas cage i don't i think joey gatto got that for me dude it was like sequence and you it looked like whatever then you would go like this and then it was nicholas cage what if hear me out and we can make this happen we just did msg what if we got nicholas cage on an episode and he just sits down with us and we give him things to read in his best nicholas cage you mean just his voice like but like he has to give it the full go you know what i mean i'd rather have mikey boobs up here singing what if we got boobs singing to nicholas cage and nicholas cage is just acting out yeah i mean you haven't thought about it i haven't it sounds like you haven't thought about it you haven't thought about it you understand it's in its early infancy it's in its early infancy i'm working it out i'm working it out real time here baby yeah all right it's not it's not you said it's not impractical jokers joe gatto no no my friend joey got it yeah yeah got it i i had that at first too to be honest but joey got us because you know i don't know who he knows he knows everybody no i does he's big he's big he's breaking out you saw he was in like a fashion magazine what him yeah they were gooning over him you're really pushing the goon and no there was like a fashion thing where it was just like look look at joe sanagato i wasn't in it by the way no gooning uh all right my last ornament here again why are we right allowing big christmas to dictate what is and is not an ornament well this is gonna be just who are we okay this thing i don't know if you guys feel this way my trees are supposed to be representative of me we know that we're supposed to be representative of me you know my childlike wonder you said that imagination right joy right humble beginnings more adjectives so that's why my last ornament is a boxed copy of super mario 64 well what are we doing from the nintendo 64 okay i think now we're getting crazy why how now we're getting crazy why is this getting crazy you allowed jeff hardy but but an italian plumber from brooklyn you don't like is he from brooklyn yeah is that true yes well i like that what do you like i like that part this is a relic of the past this was released with the united states version of the nintendo 64 this feels like you just want to tell people you have this i've always publicized that i have this this is not new how much was that well i bought it i bought it several several years ago at a steal because this is not its price now i got it for 44 what is it now you think it's a couple hundred bucks really yeah so you paid 44 for that ornament and you're judging me on mine yeah crazy well his isn't an ornament right and yours is that's the so that's that's wow that's good yep now what happens if that falls down and breaks it's not in mint condition so i'm not really that upset about it it won't be in any condition if it falls down and breaks have you ever have you opened it and played it no i have not it is an open copy though and it's it's not in great condition these are some tears on the edges and stuff like that but it's just cool to yeah it's cool but again when you look at the street you go that's frank baby can we did you just hear that yeah that was that was my fucking throat what did it do i think like bark only i could have heard it that was insane that was fucking crazy i just like but i wanted to say barked but i almost said barfed but i wanted to say roared you should roar i don't know what's going on is it possible to tilt that box like down a little bit i'm getting a lot of reflection here it's very shiny box it's very shiny box that's much better actually okay I think it's, again, when someone looks at my tree, they're going to say, wow, this is someone that is connected to their humble beginnings. You love doing that. Establishes a childlike wonder and maintains it. Right. And is a lover of things. Yeah, that's what they're going to say. What do you got? I think to round off my tree that is so clearly me, it would be remiss to not add a, I have a Picky Boys logo ornament. Oh my God, he's using it as a cheap plug for his podcast. That's fucking absolutely crazy. It's going to be a, it's Christmas themed though. You know, this is, this is, this is a monster. Let me guess, you sell it in a merch store. No, this one's one of one. This is a monster of our own making though. If we had just let him plug his shows one time, this wouldn't have happened. I have to find ways. He left a perfect space in the front of the tree so that it would open. I mean, he knows marketing. Good for you. You know what? Good for you. We'll let you keep it for this episode only, bitch. I think, how much did you, spend on that? Probably about 33 bucks. Bro, this is the most expensive tree. No, I'm kidding. It's like, it's like 12 bucks. I didn't even think of that. Trees are, like, once you like put all the ornaments and lights on them, they're like, they could be like $500 more than that. I mean, I have a fake tree, so it was more than that. How expensive was your fake tree? It was a lot. Really? Yeah. I think, it's a balsam hill. No big deal. No big deal. Spend it if you got it, baby. It's a balsam hill. Spend it. Hey, you're not going to look back and worry about that purchase. A balsam hill? Yeah. Uh-oh. Oh, no. But yeah, I think it was like 800 bucks, which is crazy for a tree. I dropped my game. I know. I got to get it. I don't have a lot of, I guess I have a decent amount of, like, we have a lot of, like, filler ornaments, too. Yep. Yep. It's good. This is the issue with putting a whole box on a tree. I feel like my tree looks beautiful. It does. Yours is covered, man. It's a wonderful tree. Yeah. A little less space to cover, that's why. Yeah. And I got you right in the middle. I appreciate that. I got you. I don't know how I feel about being a mermaid. Don't fuck around. You love the idea of being a mermaid. Oh, in life, I would like to be a mermaid. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But not merman. A shirtless one you're not into. Well, you got to be shirtless. I can't wear a shirt in the pool. In the ocean, I mean. What fucking? Dude, imagine mermaids were real. That'd be fire. What was that movie where that kid slowly- Little Mermaid. You think I forgot The Little Mermaid? What do you think? I was going to say, what was that Disney movie where the kid, like, slowly turned into, or someone slowly turned into a mermaid or something? Oh, yeah. What the fuck is that? Could just be called Mermaids. Splash? Oh, that's it. I remember. That's not a Disney movie, either. That's a Ron Howard movie. That's a full-on movie. That's a full-on movie movie. I thought of L. Ron Hubbard. When you said that, I said, what? I don't watch L. Ron Hubbard movies, Joey. We should probably be careful about bringing their lord's name up. Yeah. Because they'll be upset. Yeah. You know what? That reminded me of, like, the movie that you were just talking about. Remember those, like, weird Disney movies? The one that always stuck out to me was Luck of the Irish. Because you looked like him. I looked like him. You looked like him as a little, as a kid. No, I didn't. Yeah, you did. But he also, his hair just started to get really red. Yeah. Oh, he full-on started turning into. Yeah, that did. Dude, you remember this movie? You were going to tell me you didn't kind of look like this kid. Nah, bro. Come on. Give me a break. You had the frosted tips and everything. Oh, and look at the, I never had frosted tips. I wish. I remember Eddie's Million Dollar Cook-Off. What was the? Smart House. Smart House was a good one. Like, I always remember that scene in that movie where they had a party, and then the floor just, like, sucked up all the garbage, and it was like, oh, it's a clean house now. I was like, damn. That would be nice. What was the one? There was also the one where the girls, the twin sisters play basketball. Have you seen, have you seen? That's why I'm doing that. Have you seen the clip from it that has, like, circulated? No. Because of how bad it was done? No. Dude, it's painful to watch. Is it another thing, like, we hired actors that can't play basketball? Clearly. It's a basketball movie? Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Yeah, Disney movies had some bangers back in the day. I mean, we were open lovers of high school musicals. We were open lovers of high school musicals and Cheetah Girls, Cheetah Sisters. Cheetah, cheetah. Lizzie McGuire. I want a banger. It's a banger. I didn't say I want a banger. I don't know why that's, like, I felt the need to correct myself. We understood what you were going to say. I want a banger. Like, that's not what I said. She's coming out with new music, by the way, Hilary Duff. Perfect. If Hilary Duff does a Christmas album? Dude, didn't Disney do a Christmas album? They probably did. I'm sure. Look that up. They were working those children. Look up Disney. Look up Disney star Christmas album. I wonder what it could be. Like, it's like Corbin Bleu singing Blue Christmas. That would be incredible now that I said it out loud. I don't know about incredible. I have a blue Christmas. That's my Corbin Bleu impression. Disney 2000's Holidays? No. Disney Channel Holiday hits 2016. A bunch of the stars did a short EP November 18th. I don't care about that. I want to hear, like, the girl from Proud Family doing, you know, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Isn't that Raven-Symoné? No. I forgot her name. Kira? I can't remember. Raven-Symoné was from. That's a Raven. That's a Raven. I thought Raven-Symoné was on that show, too. No. She was on. She was. The Cosby Show. She was Stephanie on the Proud Family. She was on that show as well. Really? Yep. It was animated, though, so there's no way you knew that. It was anamorphic, dude. I knew it. Yeah. Because I remember we'd be watching Disney Channel, and there'd be, like, those, like, Christmas, like. The commercials would be, like, them singing a Christmas song. Yeah. But it would be, like, selling a CD or something. Yeah. Good times. Kids, Bob, dude. Who are these kids? I don't know. I have. Can I just really quick say something? My tree's the best. I know it's not a competition, but with you guys, it always is. I feel like mine is not good. Like, there's a lot of Nicholas kids. I mean, two is a lot. Two is a lot. If we're being honest. This is cute. This is the cutest we have everywhere. Ah, the Barney one might be cuter. Again! Oh, well, that's the problem. See, if you don't follow the rules, there's consequences, Frank. I don't want to be this guy. My tree blue. Size, good things come in small packages, is what I proved here today. Your tree blue? You guys out of the water. Oh. I don't know about all that. Oh. I think that you could have possibly. It's like, you got it there, which is a different holiday. Yeah, that's true. I think that you have a good tree. It's a good tree. It's nowhere near the quality of mine. Frank barely followed the rules. I thought he was going to pull out, like, food or something and put it on there. You know what's funny? Like an actual pickle. Is I was on the drive-in looking for a hot dog stand, and I was going to bring a full actual hot dog. That wouldn't have lasted. That wouldn't have lasted on your tree. Yeah, it would have. No, I would have walked over and ate it. Oh, really? Yeah. That would have been yummy. Well, there you have it, folks. It's a very Merry Christmas. The Christmas season is officially here. Wanted to decorate our trees, because the trees are staying for December. All right? So, thank you so much to everyone, you know, this year. We're feeling very thankful and grateful, but it's the Christmas season. Trying to get some joyous memories. With your families. All right? Oh, I actually do have one more for you, if you want. What is that? Here, it's for you. I already, I saw what it was in the air. What is it? It's a, you know that meme with the guy with the giant dick? That's what it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh. You can't show that. Well, here it is. Why, why did you have that, like, you spent money on that, too, didn't you? Yeah. That was 12 bucks. Well, now, Joey's has a lot of phallic imagery, by the way. The Cheeto, the hot dog. At this point, I'll take anything that is a Nicolas Cage. You got it. If anything could be more of the opposite of Nicolas Cage, it's that. I also, I have one more thing, if I could. What's going on? You sneaky, sneaky ornament guys. Oh, got it. Okay. All right. All right. Well. And a very Merry Christmas. And a very Merry Christmas to you guys, too. And holidays. Happy holidays. They almost got me just now. You got to throw the holidays in. You got him. So good. So good. So good. I've been gotten. Chris Mahana Kwanzaa for whatever you celebrate. How about that? Sure. Where can they find you? Ant? I'm not getting this one. No, you are not. Just look at his tree. We will see you guys next time. pink panther is here coach and spotify are teaming up to bring music and style together and they want you to be part of it grab your friends and head to the tabby tour hitting cities around the country with live performances from special artists exclusive experiences and personalized products and discover custom playlists on spotify Book just for you based on who you are and how you listen. Live your story with Coach. Learn more at coach.com.