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504 - Lindsey Graham, Invading Iran & The Summer of Sh*t

78m 45s

504 - Lindsey Graham, Invading Iran & The Summer of Sh*t

The host opens with the sudden death of Senator Lindsey Graham, dismissing official reports of chest pains and speculating he was killed by Russia while touring a Ukrainian drone factory. He paints Graham as a closeted warmonger who reveled in war machinery, even suggesting he was sexually aroused by the drones, and hypothesizes Trump may have secretly ordered his assassination to appease Putin. The discussion shifts to Trump and Vance, criticizing them for claiming election fraud despite controlling all branches of government. The host mocks Vance's podcast appearances where he downplays the Epstein scandal while admitting to conspiracies, and highlights Epstein's alleged eugenics experiments and forced pregnancies at his New Mexico ranch, noting Justice Department obstruction. He then predicts an imminent US invasion of Iran, possibly using nuclear weapons, arguing that traditional warfare is obsolete and will bankrupt America while China, through economic investment and digital surveillance, becomes the world's dominant power. The host ties environmental collapse—like fecal bacteria closing beaches—to a tech elite’s plan to pacify the masses with virtual reality and AI, allowing them to escape Earth. He ends with a cynical note on the "summer of shit," urging listeners to accept the decay, and promotes his comedy tour.

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English
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dylan show Lindsey Graham is no longer with us. And you know, this is a tough moment for our country. And he says CNN, he asked a staffer to call 911 after putting chest pains. But most people are saying he was blown up in a in a Ukrainian drone facility that he was inspecting by Russia. That Russia might have either poisoned him or they might have blown him to bits. I love these drones. They look good. I love a drone. That's probably the last thing he saw was a drone. I love these drones. They're big and hard. They fly through the air. These drones and they kill a lot of bad people. Some people gotta be killed. I don't know. It feels like people are saying that the timeline does not add up that Lindsey Graham, who is pretty seen fine. But I mean, Trump said that his dad died of the same thing around the same age. Lindsey Graham's father and that genetics is genetics. But I want to imagine Russia blowing up a drone facility where Lindsey Graham is, I think it's a better way for him to have died. And I want that to be the lasting image I have of Lindsey Graham and my mind just kind of like in a drone factory hot sweaty men and big drones. Just kind of in a in his happy place, you know, sweaty military guys and big drones. And what will you do with these drones? I love these drones. Yeah, I mean, he toured Ukrainian drone factory before his southern sudden death. What a weird thing to do to tour a drone factory. What an odd thing to do. He went to a drone factory to take a tour. He loves death. I love these drones. He loves death that guy. He liked the machinery of death. And Graham was reportedly shown vampire bomber drones, also known as Baba Yaga, as well as the Shrike FPV drone and the P1 Sun shot head interceptors. He was happy as a pig and shit. They were a bunch of sweaty guys were showing him the drones in the factory. It was a hot summer day in the Ukraine. And he was walking through the drone factory. And listen, the guy had a life. The guy had a life. And it was an American life. It was a very American life to kind of be this kind of deeply closeted southern warmonger. It's not at all out of place here. It's a very American life. No one should doubt that. I've got this new theme where I'm not even talking about right or wrong. I'm just going, is it American? It's the month of July. So during July, I've really tried to think to myself, like, is this American? Is this on brand? And it is to be like a southern, deeply closeted southern guy, sip and sweet tea, close relationship with a sister and loves war and loves war because that's what man do. They go to war. And he loved war and he loved money and he loved power and he loved having that ability to go in to Washington DC and order a bunch of people in the combat. And you know, maybe rush a poison them. Maybe they maybe that drone factory blew up. Maybe it was a sudden illness, but it feels like or maybe he got so excited during the drone tour. He got so excited that he went back to Washington DC and he automatically is fixated or something. You know, like, maybe he just really got so excited by this whole thing. It was so sexual. It was so hot that he just went back to his house and just started, you know, because the drones are kind of phallic, you know, and just imagine I think there was a part of him that imagines being pierced by a drone. Like, like, listen, getting fucked by a dick is nice, but imagine a drone. Imagine the mechanical nature of being fucked by a drone. You know, like that. And I think he might have it might have kind of it might have awakened something in him. That idea of that kind of that kind of man and machine. This idea that he could maybe have sexual relations with a drone that it could potentially, you know, enter him. And I and listen, maybe in more in more holes than one, if, you know, the number one or really pleasureing a drone for sure, worshipping it, licking it, tasting it, taking it in your mouth as far as it can go. Cutting off your oxygen with it, breathing through your nose because you have the drone in your mouth. But then also aimfully spreading your legs for it and letting it enter you and letting it dominate you and, and, and, and feeling submissive towards it because it is, it is machinery that is so advanced. It's just a highly advanced machinery imagining it, turning you. Yeah, I mean, take a look at that. There's no way that Lindsey Graham wasn't thinking a little bit at the end about what sexual relations would feel like with a drone on some level. There's no way. And by the way, he's, he's, uh, I don't think he's, he's not going to be the last one to think it. He's probably not the first and he certainly won't be the last, but certainly this idea that, you know, maybe he was very excited because this, this idea of just kind of like, you know, you know, being submissive to a drone and respecting the power of the drone, you know, could be something, could be something. The idea that I think certainly got Lindsey Graham excited, there's no way it didn't. And by the way, why not? Why not? I mean, I think that we have to stop kink shaming people like Lindsey Graham, but I do think that there, there, there's no way he wasn't a little bit turned on during that drone inspection, which again, such a weird thing here are the drones. Oh, a lot of these drones. You're such a silly Billy with your drones. Yeah, I mean, so a bunch of people are going, Hey, we don't want to hand Russia a propaganda win if, um, if it comes out the day poison Lindsey Graham or that they killed him or that he died in the explosion of the Ukrainian drone factor, which by the way, I guess I'm sure, you know, obviously I'm not an idiot. I know that on some level, it would be, um, a propaganda win, but also a lot like, there would be a lot of people in our country who didn't care. Like most of them, you know, like almost all of them wouldn't care. If any of these people, by the way, if Russia got Ted Cruz or Lindsey Graham or Mitch McConnell, like, I don't know, most people in our country, who didn't care that much, including me. I hope that doesn't sound done patriotic, but we've been arming the Ukraine to blow this shit out of Russia for years. And I'm not blaming the Ukraine, Russian invaded them, but this is a war. And if Russia decided we're gonna kill an old senator that most of you don't like anyway, and the ones to do, like it's like a tiny group of people that are directly making money from the decisions this guy makes. Most people don't even know who he is. So we'd have to do the problem is if it came out that Russia did this, we didn't have to do something. We'd have to like take offensive action against Russia because they maybe killed Lindsey Graham. I wouldn't, and I would not demand that in the government, if they literally, if it came out definitively that Russia killed Lindsey Graham, I would just go, well, you know, live by the sword, you know, I, but, you know, the guys inspecting drone factories in the Ukraine, Moscow and all of these other cities in Russia are getting hit by Ukrainian drones all the time. Why would they not kill that guy? He's like the loudest voice. One of the loudest voices to keep the party going over there. Keep the party going. Why would Putin not go, yeah, let if we can, maybe let's kill this guy. He's in the Ukraine inspecting a drone factory. Why's he even doing that? He's doing it because he likes it. You don't go, this is a beautiful time in our country, the summer, it's like one of the times people enjoy, you don't voluntarily go to the, unless Trump served him up on a silver platter to Putin, which is also very possible. Trump might have texted Putin, just kill Lindsey. He's there right now. Putin might have said, I'm fed up with your shit. I'm gonna invade Poland or something. The Trump goes, just kill Lindsey. He's in a drone factory. I'll tell you exactly where he is, mafia shit. By the way, that's maybe what happened. That's maybe exactly what happened. Trump might have said, hey, listen, we know where he is. Just promise me you'll make it quick. This is straight up mob shit. And Trump's like, we're gonna say he died of a brief illness. Make it quick. I forget the movie I'm quoting, but then somebody goes, we'll do it and we'll do it our way. It's a mafia movie or it's a sopranos or something. I forget what I'm quoting, but I, this is maybe what happened. I want you to imagine this. Putin says to Trump, I've had enough. I'm gonna use, I'm gonna use like nukes or something in Ukraine. Like, I've had enough. I gotta do something here. And Trump goes, listen, just kill Lindsey Graham. He's in the drone factory. He'll be there in two days. Just kill him. Kill him. We won't say you did it. You can kind of say you didn't wink in an odd. Your people, your people will know you did it because that's kind of the way Russia operates. The people in Russia don't need a headline to know what happened. Like when the Pregozion guy went down, when his plane went down, people immediately knew they're like, yeah, that's what happens. So like Trump might go, I don't, we don't want this public. Putin's like, yeah, I get it. And Trump's like, just get rid of Lindsey Graham. Will that satiate you for a little bit? And Putin's like, yeah, Putin might have asked Trump. Putin might have said, we got it. We got a kill Lindsey Graham. And Trump's like, yeah, all right. Trump doesn't care. Trump goes, yeah, just kill Lindsey Graham. Just kill Lindsey Graham. That'll buy us a few months, kill Lindsey Graham. Your people kind of know you did it. It'll buy us a few months, you know, folks. I cannot say enough about ethos. In fact, it's actually damaged my friendships. How much I discuss ethos? Because ETHOS.com/Tim is where you need to go to get life insurance immediately same day coverage. No doctors exam, no bullshit there. I mean, they're basically good. They're on your team. Hey, hey, how about that? Hey, how about someone on your team? You can get up to three million in coverage. Some policies are as low as $30 a month. How about that for once in your life? Someone on your team. And you'll get the lowest rate from their network of trusted carriers. They have 4.8 out of five stars on trust pilot with over 4,000 reviews. Hey, look, finally, someone is on our team, honey. Our life is better because of ethos. 10 minutes to get covered. 10 minutes with life insurance through ethos. That seems crazy, but I know it's true. Trust pilot ratings as of 6, 1, 20, 25, what are they? I think 4.0.5. Yeah, it's the top. What are you nuts? Finally, someone is has your back ethos. They have your back to run your team. Honey, we're insured. My life is insured. It has value now. My life has value now. 3 million. You can do that joke. I'm worth more than a life. (humming) I'm worth more than their life. (humming) That's ethos.com/jim ethos.com/jim application times. They vary rates, they vary. We're all over the map here. Trump comes out yesterday and goes to voting. It's all fucked up, but yet the Republicans won 2016 and 2024. And now they have the house in the Senate. They have all those races. They won. And they won the presidency. And he's claiming that the voting is the biggest issue. They genuinely, literally right now, have all of the, they have the Congress, the house. I'm sure the house, the Congress Senate, everything. Kind of most of the Supreme Court. Thomas Massey made that point. He's like, you know, we kind of have all of the things we could want. And they're going out and going, the election was stolen. Now, by the way, I'm not saying there's no voting problems. There's probably voting problems. There's weird laws in California that have people like show up to a polling station with a bunch of ballots, go, hey, my whole family voted. And here's what they think. That's weird. But Trump's out there talking about voting. He's the president. It's the craziest thing I've ever heard. He's like, the voting irregularities and the elections are stolen, but you're, you're the president. You're the president and you're, you ran on a platform of no new wars. And you're about to put troops on the ground in Iran. 1000% you are the president. Like, you're not, you're not popping shit from outside of the government. This is the thing when like JD Vance goes on Rogan and goes, well, you know, they have this whole discussion about the Epstein docs. And JD is like, I'll go to my death, believing it was a larger conspiracy. You know, it's, it's kind of like these guys are like, well, what are you going to do? What are you going to do? It's like, no, you're the, you're the vice president. What are you talking about? JD Vance is talking about this like he's a guy at a bar in the town. I grew up in on Long Island, where he'd be like, I'll always believe it was a conspiracy. You sure that guy owns a pool company. He's, he's going to, he's going to be like, yeah, what are you going to do? I'll always believe someone on there. This guy is the vice president of the United States of America. Going on the biggest podcast in the world, gun, be up. I read all the files, Trump's innocent. Also, I'll always believe there was a greater conspiracy there. I always think something was going on, but what am I going to do on the vice president? That shady Vance's character arc right now is his whole entire thing. It's just telling people what the vice president can't do. Like what about the war and I ran, you know, there's not much I can do. I just kind of hang out and, you know, watch, watch as I'm part of the administration that betrays its voters and does the opposite of everything it said it was going to do. I just kind of hang out and, you know, this Epstein thing. Who knows? You know, what are you gonna do? It's a lot of what are you gonna do energy from the vice president? I'm not saying the vice president's like an old powerful figure, but it's just hilarious that like that's his argument. And what are you gonna do? Nah, what are you gonna do? Yeah, these Epstein docs, you know, isn't that not show? You heard about that? What? You're the vice president of the United States. This is the, they keep trying to play this game. Were there like this folksy, kind of like relatable, like, yeah, these fucking elites? These fucking elites, would these their fucking the kids? They're stealing your money? What? Who? You are doing it. You're the ones you were doing it. And they're relying on the fact that some of their most ardent supporters, the ones who aren't directly being paid off are the stupidest people in the world. So that still works on them. They're like, yeah, fucking Hillary. Bae, Hillary Clinton. Fucking Hillary Clinton. The guy, they're in the White House. They have the Congress. They have the Senate. They have the Supreme Court. It is them. It is now them. I don't wanna hear about the deep state anymore. You're playing me for a fool. You're playing everyone for a fool. You brought in Keshe Patel. You brought in that other guy, Dan Bonsino. You threw him out or he laughed, whatever. You brought in Pam Bondi and then threw her out. I'm sick of hearing about this deep state. All of these people, you have to be one of the stupidest people in the world to fall for this shit at this point. This is, you are peddling the dumbest, most like, by the way, I hate to use this word, but cringe. It's literally cringe. You watch this and you go, I feel so disgusted by the fact that they think people are still gonna believe this shit. Well, it's the deep state. You guys covered all this shit up. Polymarket has it like that work like the odds to put boots on the ground before 2027 is almost 30%. It's like a 26% chance. I think it's much higher than that. I think they're wrong on this because there's nothing to do. There's nowhere to go. There's two options here, nuke, boots on the ground, and you've got a guy in there who might do a combination, might do one or the other, he might do both. Who knows what the fuck he does? And they know the Israel knows that they can't allow I ran to be anything functional. And a lot of the war hawks in America and the people, they know that I ran cannot be functional at all. It can be chaos. It's not going to look like Vermont. It's not going to look like Newport Beach. They know that so it can be chaos. It can be nuts. It can be nuts like warring factions and craze. That's fine. It could look like the bar from Star Wars. But what it can't be is any type of functional country. So you got it. That's why we're bombing the shit out of them right now. Civilian losses going up or inflicting pain. We're trying to fucking show them that we can hurt them and we'll hurt them. But it won't be enough again unless we put boots on the ground. And, and by the way, I should, I should, but I think they're wrong. 26% by the way, I think it's much higher because there's nowhere else to go. There's genuinely nowhere else to go. What exactly are we going to do here? And I'm obviously don't want it to happen. Do you think JD Vance will go back on Rogan when there are boots on the ground and I ran and go, yeah, I don't, you know, it's sort of can do. It's why I mean, it's if you see this. Have you seen this show? These boots on the ground and I ran. That's wild, huh? That's crazy. He has like this detached intellectual thing he does. JD Vance, like he's not to put like he's like a commentator. He's like, you know, like he's like, well, yeah, you know, this is a, it's interesting. This Epstein stuff. That's interesting. So I wonder when we have boots on the ground and I ran, yeah, here we go. Let's, let's, this is a JD Vance friend of the show here talking about Jeffrey Epstein on the Joe Rogan podcast. What I have seen and I've looked at most of the files is that they're just, we stopped for a minute. How does he have time to like write a book, read all of the Epstein, like how does he have the time to do this? By the way, is there, is there, he's wrote a book? He's, he's reading all of the Epstein files. What did, when's he doing that? He's also a dad, a husband, the vice president. When's he doing that? What is he doing? Is he reading them to the kids at night? Is he reading the Epstein files to the children? Is that the reading material for the household? How exactly does this work that you're reading the Epstein files every day? Is that odd? Anyway, let's, let's listen here. What I have seen and I've looked at most of the files is that they're just, wasn't dispositive evidence. And if that was, dispositive evidence ever existed, it was probably destroyed after 2006, 2007. Now look, again, in our defense, yes, was there some, you know, bitching and moaning and was there some back and forth? Yes, but there, that we eventually collected six million documents as part of it. It wasn't six million. The president, people say the president was a holocaust. Those of you paying attention, that was a joke about the Holocaust. I'm not saying the holocaust wasn't six million, but what an odd number of documents. JD Vance is screaming six million. What a strange, all right, continue. The idea that Donald Trump could not have killed that legislation, especially with the United States Senate is a joke. He absolutely could have killed it. What did he do? He actually said, no, we're going to release these files. He thought, you know, he was annoyed by the story. He was annoyed by the Democrats accusing him of doing things bad. By the way, like, do I think there is any. Stop it for a minute. He was annoyed that the Democrats, Rick, can you play that again? That like, absolutely could have killed it. What did he do? He was annoyed by the Democrats, accusing him of doing things bad. He was annoyed that the Democrats were accusing him of doing things bad. It was annoying to him. Yeah, I mean, this, this is again, the demographic of people that this appeals to, or that this works on, I, I mean, I've met some of them so I know who they are. And I'm not going to claim that I don't know them. I know some of them intimately. And it's not even JD Vance's fault. It is his fault, but it's not his fault that he's like a specifically terrible character. They're ruling the mafia. It's just a mafia. It's just to some mafia family. That's what it is. You just got to go out and you go, well, you know, it's actually, he didn't do anything wrong. I looked at everything myself. He didn't do anything wrong. He was with me the whole night, your honor. He couldn't have been. He couldn't have killed the. So it's just like this guy's in an unenviable position of coming out all over the internet. Now going, this guy's in a press tour for a book where days away from troops on the ground and I ran the Middle East is a total nightmare, the economies and nightmare. The Straits of Hormuz just going to be like a massive oil crisis soon. And they've given so much money to big tech and AI. The flock cameras, all of this stuff, all of this. They're building a surveillance state with this money. They're building a digital surveillance state with the money. And he's got to do this kind of like aw, shocks. Can you, but yeah, isn't it wack? Isn't it wacky? Joe, isn't it wacky? Isn't it wacky being VP? It's like, it's so wacky. I tell myself all the time I had to pinch myself. It's crazy. So now, by the way, just to remind everyone what this was here. Let's go talk to, let's play this clip that today about what Epstein was doing. It got on the nose. And I want to play this clip for people because there is this idea for whatever reason. The Jeffrey Epstein was like a Gadsby like figure who surrounded himself with like young, mostly legal-aged women and though morally questionable was not a guy that was into was not some, we wasn't to pedophile or nothing he was doing was illegal or that he wasn't blackmailing anyone or that he wasn't like working with, I know JD says that thing on Rogan where he's like, guys, he had relationships with this intelligence agency and that one. And he was all over the map and I'll go to my death believing there was a greater conspiracy. But basically what JD say is like, we don't plan to do anything about it. We don't plan to flesh out the dimension of whatever quote conspiracy there was. We don't want to find these things out. Although we, we have to concede that there's some real questions to be asked because we know you're all not that retarded. We know that some of you have some level of your brains that are still functioning. Some level of your brains are still functioning. I know that they're soaking in frappuccinos and energy drinks and, you know, you're having strokes on a way to work and everything. The air quality's bad. There's fecal matter in the ocean. You know, we've poisoned you nine ways till Sunday. Your kids are chewing out of all. We get it. We know how much we've broken your attention spans and brains algorithms corrupt your ability to focus on anything for more than 20 seconds. Um, but still even in that insane hellscape that we've created, some of you are able to focus and we can't tell you that there's nothing to see here, which by the way, we tried two months ago when this whole thing happened, we tried to go out and go, man, not to say, man, not to see here. We were wrong. Sorry, but then we've actually had to, because when the evidence came pouring out, we had to come out and go, no, no, no, yeah, there, there is, this is weird. This is weird. Here is a, this is 60 minutes Australia, right? Again, it's not a conspiracy program, not a crazy program, not something that's completely insane. It says QAnon that Joe Biden's clone and whatever Ellen DeGeneres has Kuru that cannibal disease, which would be hilarious if she had it. I've seen a evidence that she has it, but if, if Ellen DeGeneres died of Kuru that cannibal disease from eating children, it would be very funny. Obviously not for the children she ate, but for me, personally, if I read that and it was from a respectable place, Ellen DeGeneres dies of Kuru, the disease you get from Bush meat, but I'm saying that this is not one of those sites. This is 60 minutes Australia talking about Jeffrey Epstein who was engaged in like this weird doctor strange love type of like science experiments and shit in that New Mexico ranch. And I always wondered, I'm like, why don't you hear more about that New Mexico ranch? What about that island? And now that island's creepy as fuck. And there was, you know, we know that the island is also probably the source of a lot of like immorality, illegality, evil, monstrous behavior. God only knows, but the ranch in New Mexico is super creepy. They're actually trying to investigate it. And I believe the Trump administration is like trying to like shut it down. The investigation we could look into that in a second. But again, this ranch in New Mexico, it's in the middle of nowhere. Zoro ranch. So all of this guy's properties by the, and you would say to yourself, and this guy's just hanging out with 19 year olds and hotties and he's, you know, he's like a pimp. Why is he? Why does he have these layers in the middle of nowhere? It just doesn't make any sense. Like, yeah, you had a house in Manhattan, you had a town or some Manhattan, you had a house in Palm Beach, he was in, in areas where people were, but he also, in addition to that, has these very isolated, very strange in the middle of nowhere layers, like in the middle of New Mexico or an island. And you start saying yourself, that's interesting. And I wonder what was going on there? And this guy's into some weird stuff. Let's take a listen to this. Girls waking up in sort of like a dark room with like a female doctor scanning over them, feeling like maybe there is some kind of procedure that had happened that they weren't aware of. And I believe this is in the file, sure there's something in there about a baby actually being born. And then just just disappearing, like Galen taking it. I personally never witnessed anything like that, but I do remember overhearing conversations about trying to create the perfect baby, the perfect baby, the perfect gene pool. And I know that there was sort of a hunt, if you will, for the perfect gene pool. Zorro was a wacky hideaway for Epstein and his cronies and a place to enact their most freakish fantasies, including at one point a plan for a controversial designer baby and human cloning project, in which emails from the files show, the maniacal Epstein was prepared to invest in as long as he remained anonymous. We were hearing some of the most horrible and heinous things that anyone could imagine. The allegations span everything from the harvesting of sex organs to allegations of women having forced abortions or forced pregnancies or coerced pregnancies. I think when we think about the stories and the span of stories, it sounds fictional. It sounds like a horror film. Well, there you go. A forced pregnancy friend of the show Jeffrey Epstein at his Zorro ranch in New Mexico. He was this guy had interest in like transhumanism. He was a eugenicist. He wanted to you know, create like the perfect race. He wanted to see the planet with his DNA in some weird way. He hung out. We'll build with Bill Gates and all these creepy scientists. He would bring on bring all these nerd scientists and get them young pussy and then tried to I guess apply them for information or get get them on board with whatever project he was looking into. But the fact that this guy was able to do all of this for decades without any real pushback, any consequences, one slap on the wrist, sweetheart deal. And the idea that like this, this is not really reported. I mean, we have to go to 60 minutes Australia, by the way, to find out where's the New York Times on this. It's a little, it's it suggests that to me, it suggests that like Epstein was another thing. Like we tend to think of like spies as like 007 James Bond, you know, we tend to think of mission impossible. We tend to think of like the born supremacy. That's what we think of as like spies like covert operatives running around the world, trying to best each other at the game of espionage. And he's not doing that. It's not him. He's not Jason born. Uh, okay. But there's all kinds of spies. Not all spies are Jason born. Not all spies are running around with, you know, poison, ink and a pen and killing it that way. So then he go, well, then, then there's, um, there's analysts that sit in the CIA and type up reports based on what the Jason born people say he's not doing that. He wasn't like sitting in the CIA decoding all this raw intelligence and typing up and writing reports and handing them to somebody and going, oh, here's the reports that we got from the station chief in Istanbul about the Muslim brotherhood. And here's what they said. And somebody, we have a cafe bugged. And one of our guys runs the cafe and he heard them talking about blah, blah, blah. He's not doing that. That's not his job. Okay. So he's not Jason born. He's not, he's not like, um, he's not like an analyst, not an intelligence analyst sitting there decoding, uh, intelligence and writing reports. He's not doing that. Um, he's not a guy who seems to be really publicly advocating for a specific company. So he's not like running around going like it's all about Palantir. Are you got to get on board with Honeywell or general dynamics or whatever. He's this other thing. It's like weird, strange other thing. And his life makes no sense from the beginning of it till the end of it. The beginning of his life where he's like a math teacher at a, at a prep school. And then he's working at an investment bank. And then he owns the largest piece of real estate Manhattan. And then he's controlling less wester's entire fortune. And then he's experimenting potentially on, on women in a ranch in New Mexico because he's into this weird like, you know, eugenics. And then supposedly he kills himself in the most secure prison in the country. None of it makes any sense at all. And then JD Vance is on Rogan going, yeah, I'll always, I'll always believe there's something going on. So here this is the New York Times. I will have to apologize to the New York Times because they wrote about this, but they're not writing, but I don't see a lot of the eugenics stuff in the New York Times. You can correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't see that because that's even like to disturbing for them. But New Mexico accuses the Department of Justice have obstructing Epstein ranch inquiry. New Mexico's Attorney General unveiled a letter he sent last week to the acting U.S. Attorney General Todd Blanch, accusing the Justice Department of withholding critical evidence. They don't want this solved, by the way, they don't want it solved. They're not going to solve this. They will not solve this. Raul Torres, New Mexico's top law enforcement officer first requested original documents related to the convicted sex offender zero ranch property in February. He said he reiterated their quest five times in the following months through a range of channels, but Justice Department Department officials so far had not responded. The records contain names of survivors, witnesses, co-conspirators, and other individuals who may aid the long delayed state investigation into the deceased financeeers crimes in New Mexico. They're not going to do, they're not opening this can of warms. They're not going to do it. They're not going to do it because it leads to something that's good. It's going to be more questions and answers. It's like they're going to go like, what was this guy? And then how many of those guys are there? That's the other quill like how many Epstein's are there? Because now like every article written about him is like he was a special guy. He's a special guy, charismatic, intelligent. He had powerful friends. He was a special guy, but how many of those guys are out there with their lives make no sense in the world that we understand Jeffrey Epstein's life makes no say it would be like describing an alien to somebody who like didn't need oxygen and could survive without any type of sunlight or whatever. You're talking about a guy who there's not one thing about his life that makes any sense at all. And you you're left with this idea that there's gaping parts of the world that you just don't know anything about. I don't even know anything about how this even works. Even as a conspiracy theorist, you go, I don't know anything about it because it's strange even in that sense because you go, what is this? So I got it's possible. He's just a super motivated pedophile. That's possible like he's like a super motivated pedophile. He's just like one of these guys who's like really trying to, you know, make them up, but you know, that also asks questions where you go, how does he get the things he has and how does he have the connections he has. And nobody wants to open that up. And instead of that, we'll just invade Iran. We'll just put boots on the ground with Iran because who gives a fuck? Who cares about this stuff? Armor collage was so important right now because I'm telling you right now, folks, they're learning so much right now about the, the, the, the, the good health, right? Living life is easier if you actually feel good. Process foods and environmental threats and the modern stressors of just existing, you feel run down. Do you want strengthened immune health, fortified gut health, healthy metabolism, hair health, skin health, go to armor dot com slash Tim a r m r a dot com. It's nature's original super food. Closh, it was packed with over 400 bioactive ingredients of fortified gut health, strengthened immune health, promote health, metabolism and fuel fitness performance because keeping up with the chaos of modern life is a lot more fun when you have the stamina to do it. How about that? We've worked at a special offer for my audience, receive 30% off your first subscription or to go to armor dot com slash Tim or enter it. I am to get 30% off your first subscription order. That's a r m r a dot com slash Tim upwork is big scaling a business takes to write expertise at the right time. Upworks help growing teams quickly bring in specialized freelancers. Upwork is a one stop platform to find higher and pay expert freelancers across web and so for development data and analytics marketing business operations and more with business plus you can access a top one percent of talent on upwork with an AI powered shortlisting you'll get matched to the right freelance or under six hours. No endless searching requires. Upwork also cuts down operational hassle by handing things at contracts and payments in one place so you can spend more time running the business. Thousands of growing businesses ready trust upwork to hire flexible high quality freelance talent for everything from one off projects to ongoing support. It's free to sign up and posting a job is easy. Visit upwork.com slash Tim right now and post your job for free. That's upwork.com slash Tim to connect with top talent ready to help your business grow. That's you P w r k dot com slash jam upwork dot com slash Tim. Trump leans toward expanding US military operations in Iran. This is from the times while preferring diplomacy. Trump was briefed this week on options, including the use of ground troops and bombing pickaxe mountain. He's going to do it. He's going to do it. He's going to nuke him. He's going to probably nuke him. I mean, they know they've got the one president in there that might use a nuclear wet. No one else would. They know they've got the guy that may just say, fuck it. He might just get up one day and say, fuck it. Trump hosted a situation room meeting Tuesday evening to discuss the potential seizure of carg island and other territory along the strait of hormones using US troops as well as a potential bombing of a tunnel complex complex at pickaxe mountain, a nuclear link site. The US has yet to target expanding airstrikes against more targets in Iran, including energy sites also remains a possibility. The discussion was one of multiple formula and informal conversation. Trump has had in recent days with senior officials, including JD Vans, Pete Hegsath, Marco Rubio, Dan Kane, the chairman of the joint chafes, et cetera. They know, they know they've got a guy in there who, depending on his mood, could very well use a nuclear weapon. And there are people probably behind the scenes pushing for that gun. Listen, you're either going to go down in history as losing this war or you're going to use a nuke. And I know it's going to be tough. And it's going to suck. And the rest of the world's going to get mad at you. I think China and Russia have probably said that they won't, they won't stamp, stand by and let us use a nuke, but they probably will. Because then chaf, we use a nuke and I ran China forever and have, by the way, China then becomes the moral leader of the world, even though they might be ready. By the way, China may already be the moral leader of the world right now. I want everyone to think about that role that around in your fucking head. And if we use a nuclear weapon, China will emerge as the clear humanitarian alternative. The West will lose all credibility almost overnight. And China will emerge as the as this superpower that is humanitarian because they're not going around. Even though they've got that a camp of weager muslims that they put them in a concentration camp, which I don't care about. And no one does, by the way, no one cares about their concentrate. They keep trying to get that out. The Republicans keep going, what about the weager muslim? No one cares about that. Enough. No one gives a shit. Maybe they should, but they don't. China will emerge from this because they're not invading countries. Everybody lives over there in a digital surveillance state, which is whatever people just don't care. Now, you know, they should, but they don't. And they're not going to care in America either. They don't care. They're not going to care. This is not a country of people who are like demanding freedom and every they don't care. They really don't care. So that let's, let's just put the kabasha on that immediately that there's going to be like a few people can destroy some flock cameras. And by the way, more power to you. Good for you. I don't want any of this shit, but the idea that like the vast majority of people in this country care about a surveillance day, they don't care. So you try to hang that on China like they have a digital credit score there. No one here can afford any health care. No one here can afford anything. So like you're asking all these people in America to talk about how horrible China is while their lives suck. Now, China might be much worse than America. Like I would never want to live there. But what a hard sell that is, you're trying to sell people on the idea that like the ultimate evil is China. No one, no one, by the way, you're failing at that. No one believes that. It's like the, and I hate using these dumb examples, but it's true it's the chick in the office who keeps talking about someone and to a point where you all go, you start Siding with the person they're trashing because you go, how bad could they be? You're the one who keeps coming in here every day telling us how bad they are. Maybe you're bad. And that's what's happening. Like, so if we nuke Iran, or if we even invade, if we put boots on the ground and I ran, here's how this plays out, China emerges the single superpower in the, in the world with the respect and the United States of America collapses. By the way, and quickly, our dollar will not be the reserve currency for much longer. This country will collapse pretty quickly. And this war doesn't, boots on the ground doesn't. It will do it because China emerges. Everyone lets make deals with China. The West is done. The West is done. London's done. America's done. They go, we're looking at China. We're looking at Shanghai. We're looking at Beijing. We're looking at fucking Dubai or whatever. We're looking at the UAE. America couldn't even defend the Gulf States. The bases they had in the Gulf States. America can't even beat Iran. So we've all been told like, whoa, where the, where the fucking toughest guy on the block. That's not true. We, we've just kind of been exposed. Doesn't mean we don't have nukes and we don't have missiles. We don't have, you know, a great military in the, in the fact that the people that join it, you know, should obviously be respected and you should hope they win. But let's look at like the facts. The facts on the ground right now are that war no longer works. China realized this years ago, China goes, war doesn't work. If China thought war worked, it would have invaded Iran years ago. I'm sorry, not Iran. Taiwan. If China thought war worked, China would have invaded Taiwan. China's smart enough to go war doesn't work. Look at Russia and the Ukraine, look at war worked in the time when you could go and carpet bomb city. Here's your war works for. I'm telling you right now Israel. And here's why it works for them. They're willing to just go in and kill everybody. You have to be willing to go in and kill everybody for war to work. Otherwise, it doesn't work. Surgical strikes. Winning the information war. No, none of that works. None of it works. You have to be willing to go in and basically kill everybody. And if you're unwilling to do that, it's just a matter of time before you have to, it's either going to be a stalemate, a frozen conflict, you're going to, you're going to just get your citizens, you're going to decide it's not worth it. War doesn't work. It doesn't work. And China gets it, China goes, we're just going to spread money around. We do the Belt and Road Initiative. We're going to build schools. And yes, we're going to put everyone in our surveillance grid and our social credit score. And we're taking everybody's freedom. And I'm not for any of that. And Chinese going to go, we're, we're not a cut. We will kidnap you if you have too much money. And we're not going to tolerate and we're, we're, we're a centralized control system where people are going to feel like they are free, but make no mistake. They are not. But the way we export that control system to the rest of the world is not at the barrel of a gun. They watched our misadventures in the Middle East. They watched us lose credibility. They watched how embarrassing it was. And China goes, no, we're just going to spread a lot of money around. We're going to engage in a lot of corporate espionage. We're going to steal a lot of good ideas. We're going to, we're going to, we're going to know what everybody else is doing. And our technological supremacy is going to enslave the world before the United States. The United States is going to go bankrupt themselves with wars. And Russia can bankrupt itself with wars. Because they're still living in the last century when you could do this, when you could invade Ukraine and it would work. It doesn't work. It doesn't work. The fact that they just had to kill Lindsey Graham, they feel good about themselves. Russia said to kill Lindsey Graham to just feel good about themselves. They should have been able to win this thing already. America should have been able to win this. Here's Lindsey Graham, by the way, suggesting Israel should nuke Gaza. This is Lindsey Graham. It's a great Eulogy for him. Friend of the show Lindsey Graham. So when we were faced with destruction as a nation after Pearl Harbor, fighting the Germans and the Japanese, we decided to end the war by bombing Hiroshima and Nagasaki with nuclear weapons. That was the right decision. Give Israel the bombs they need to end the war. They can't afford to lose and work with them to minimize casualties. So can I say this? Why is it okay for America to not to to drop two nuclear bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki to end their existential threat war? Why was it okay for us to do that? I thought it was okay to Israel do whatever you have to do. You must have had so much fun in Israel. He must have said that he was probably checked into a hotel in Israel and then immediately balls just were just bouncing off his channel for 48 hours. He must have had so much fun to be this explicit, to be like, just just nuke him. Even people are probably like, Lindsey, let's not go that hard. Like even like his handlers are probably like, Lizzie, let's reign in in love. Hey, how about you just nuke him. Give him the bombs that are needed to do the job. Why is it okay that we drop two bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki and you can't use nuclear weapons on God. So just nuke him. Duke nuke him baby. Like it's so I envy the amount of fun he must have had there. Maybe if it was if they would provide me with whatever they provided him with maybe I'd be here being like, just nuke him. God damn it. It's the Christian thing to do is to nuke somebody. I just can't I can't imagine. But this is this is all the and this is this is actually good clip. This is all that is left. All that is left by the way in these conflicts. I hate to say it and I don't want to be prophetic here because none of these prophecies end up being good. Is the only thing that's left to do is to start nuking people. There's nothing left to do. These countries like Russia in the United States, they're taking humiliation after humiliation. They're you're we're heaping humiliations of Russia. Hopefully that worked out. And we're actually we're also engaged in some kind of weird humiliation ritual herself because like we are now being found out that we do not have the military supremacy that we thought we did in the sense that sinister banners shows Trump family in coffins as I ran demands blood for blood. Yeah, I mean, you know, this is what this book I ran I ran state we killed their leader. We killed their spiritual leader. And I imagine they're not thrilled about that. I, you know, this is like it's so hard to like talk to people because people everyone's like a goldfish to have no memory. So goldfish like every time they go around that little bowl, it's like, oh, wow. A castle, some some trees, food like goldfish. Don't know what's going on. So we also have that because like you would see this. You go, okay, look at what I ran as doing. And you go, yeah, but we like killed their spiritual leader. On like day one of the war, we just whack the guy. What do you think happens? How do you think they responded at? But war doesn't work. This is what we've learned. We've learned this over the last 12 to 24 months. We saw it with Russia and Ukraine. We saw it. War does not work unless you are willing to deliver a real like devastating blow. To a large number of civilians. Otherwise war doesn't war doesn't really work in in in in this era. Number one, it's on TikTok. It's on social media. That's why they're banning all these apps for kids. They're not banning them because they care about your kids mental health. I've said it before. They're banning it because young people are kind of they're the ones getting really fucked over by what's going on now. And they want to know why their countries are being delivered to organizations like the EU. And I'm not saying that everything's bad about the EU, but they're going like, why do I have to accept higher levels of migration? Less economic opportunity. Why do I have to accept certain cultural norms that I may or may not agree with? Why does it feel like there's a monoculture that's being thrust on me and and my generation of people and those people start questioning those things. So that's why they're getting rid of social media because they don't want people. They don't want people being exposed to those debates. They don't want they don't want people seeing that. They basically need compliance in the way that you get compliance from people is to take away their ability to get information. So, you know, and by the way, every group of people is fighting for the net generation of people. So if you're an Islamist, you want those kids And you want them to to Islam. If you are a Christian nationalist, you want them to be a part of the project of fusing Christianity and politics. If you are radical Zionist, you want to convert those kids to the idea that Israel's owed large swaths of the surrounding countries and that's a biblical prophecy. If you are a secular, you know, LGBTQIA2 plus, you know, you're trying to convert that generation to your way of thinking. And it's a battle, and now the internet's just hate. It's just groups of people that hate each other. There's almost no, I got to be honest with you. There's almost no reason. This shall of course is, but there's almost no reason to go on the internet anymore. Really, I mean, it's all AI slop and just hate. It's just groups of people who hate other groups of people and blame them for why society looks the way it does. It's a bunch of cultures competing to be who can be a victim. It is really a depressing, disputing place. But make no mistake, they're not taking it away from young people to safeguard their mental health. You can't say this. We should take away Tiktok because it, it foxes with young people's mental health, but also we should draft them to fight Iran. Because by the way, I imagine, and again, not a doctor, but I imagine that would do something to their mental health as well. Putting them on an aircraft carrier and putting them in the Persian Gulf, that might do something to their mental health as well. I'm aware Tiktok drives up anxiety, but you can't make the argument that you are trying to safeguard young people's mental health. If you are willing to ship them to Iran, then just doesn't work. That's the craziest thing I've ever heard. You know where these kids can finally get rid of their anxiety on a flight to Iran. It doesn't make any sense to anybody. And this is an old way of running the world. The China's realized this year is good. China's like it's not going to be wars. It's going to be a digital surveillance grid that everyone lives under and everyone will be happy enough. This is what China has realized. China is like, listen, we're going to put everybody, we're going to wrap the tentacles of the digital control grid slowly around people by giving them money, making investments in their infrastructure and your economy. We're going to do that and let America run around the globe with a gun, losing wars, bankrupting itself. Let Russia do the same thing. Let Israel do it. China is sitting back and again, no fan of China. Don't want China to win, but how's that going? China is going to emerge from this as the leader of the world and may already have for two main reasons. Number one, China has realized that the ways of dominating the globe that existed for thousands of years are no longer effective. They're no longer effective. You're not going to be able to whack the leader of a country and see everybody fall in line. You're not going to be able to show up with a bunch of aircraft carriers and fighter jets and take over a country of 90 million people and get them to think the way you think. China knows that's not effective. They know that. And the second reason China is emerging as the leader of the world is because the things that they are putting their energy into are the new ways to dominate the world, which is a massive digital grid that everybody will exist on. That's 1000% where it's all going. I don't like where it's going. I've been very honest about not liking where it's going, but they know that's where it's going and we know that's where it's going. That's why we're trying to like do it here and they're doing it there and whatever. But they're just watching us take L's which is stacking L's and the only way to get out of this is to Trump start firing nukes. I hope he doesn't do it. But he's a lunatic show. And when Trump nukes, I ran shady vans to go right on rogue and I go, I mean, Joe, isn't isn't crazy. Isn't it crazy that Trump, you know, the president was very clear in the beginning of this that he didn't want Iran to have a nuclear weapon. And you know, we got to a point when we had to deliver quite a devastating blow to Iran. And it's unfortunate. You know, lots of people died. You know, I'm a Christian Joe. I hate that. I hate see anyone dying. You know, of course, and I was in the situation room when we fired the nuclear weapons at them. But you know, I said a little prayer. I'm a Christian Joe, of course. I wouldn't want anyone heard. Of course, we did kill tens of thousands of people instantaneously. And then sometimes I just think to myself, Joe, you know, you ever just think to yourself, you ever just think to yourself, isn't it crazy where life takes you? You know, if you had told me, I'd be sitting in the situation room. We fired nuclear weapons on Iran. I would, I would have told you you were nuts. I would have told you, you were crazy. And I went down, I sat with Usha. We had a nice dinner. And I, and I said to where I said, I said, isn't this wild? Just look around at our life. And you know, she silently ate the eggplant. She doesn't, you know, eat meat, of course. You know, she's, she's in that demon religion. All these demons, they don't eat meat. But I, I said to her, I said, what a, what a crazy day it work is it's just for me. It's another day at work. You know, some people, some people go and teach the kids at the school, some people go and, you know, trade the stocks. But, you know, I went into work today and we vaporized a lot of people, just killed a lot of people. Joe, we killed a lot of people today. And I don't like that. Something I don't like. But, you know, as the vice president, my job is to just kind of sit there while we knew a country. And just kind of I provide my opinion. And, and then we just try to minimize the damage. You know, I, I say a prayer. I try to provide this president with all the supporting needs. But that's where we're going. That's where we're going for JD Vance will be on a, a new tour. He'll be on a new tour. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Trust me. JD Vance will be on a PR tour after we knew kind ran. And he'll be sitting there on all the podcasts. You know what I mean? He'll be on caller daddy. He'll go, he'll do everything. And he'll be there trying to justify the use of a new club. It's because, unfortunately, that's the only way to go. So many people right now are, are, are, are, are really putting some focus into the old and how they look. And neutrophils number one dermatologist recommended hair growth supplement brand used by over 1.5 million people that has formulas built for men at different life stages. They have things for guys that are 18 to 49, neutrophil for men 50 plus, which is the first product of his kind specifically made for men over 50. Addressed a key root causes of hair thinning wherever you're at in life grow visibly thicker fuller hair in three to six months. I'm telling you, it's the official hair growth partner of Major League Baseball. These are guys who perform at the highest level. And they trust neutrophil to keep them on top of their game. It's backed by peer reviewed studies and NSF certified for sport, the gold standard for supplement quality. This is what the athletes are using. And if it's good enough for them, it's good enough for you. Start neutrophil today and make that hot optional. Visit neutrophil.com enter promo code TAM for $10 off your first month subscription and free shipping. Find out when neutrophil is the best selling hair growth supplement brand at neutrophil.com spelled N-U-T-R-A-F-O-L.com promo code T-I-N. That's neutrophil.com promo code Tim. Quick before we get out of here, bacteria shuts down beaches coast to coast in the U.S. You can't go to the beach anymore because there's shit in the water. Let's listen to this. Tonight from California to Cape Cod, beachgoers escaping scorching summer temps are running into a wave of issues. Dozens of beaches in Massachusetts temporarily shut down. Officials posting water quality warnings at beaches in New York, New Jersey, Washington State, and here in Southern California, where the famed Santa Monica pier comes flanked with signs sharing swim at your own risk. Is it harmful? Is it not? I mean, we hear bacteria automatically think it's harmful. Yeah, the heightened levels of bacteria discovered, a sign water may be contaminated with germs or fecal man. Here's what it is. This is what all the tech people wrote. We're at the end of this. We're at the end of the of this being a livable planet and they know that and that's where they're trying to get out of here. You know, like, you know, it's 110 degrees and you're just trying to cool off and you can't swim in the ocean because it's a toilet and there's shit everywhere. Show the tech people know that. I mean, let's say this creeps. Sure, freaks. Absolutely. But they know, they know that this is like whatever this has been is ending. We're watching this. And we're going towards a new thing. We don't know what that new thing is going to be. We talked about a little bit what it's going to look like, but they know this. You can't even swim in the ocean anymore because it's just bacteria and shit. And all these factories and stuff and companies, they just dump shit in the oceans and they dump bacteria and they don't care. And you know, eventually you just spoil the planet and you go, we got to go somewhere else. We got to get out of here. We got to get out of here and then, but, but before we can get out of here, we got to build the digital grid so that people can just chill and that while we figure out how to get out, because they're going to say to people like, listen, don't go swimming to shit water. Go on this app and you feel like you're there. Like they got to build the reason the digital grid is so important is that it will pacify the people just long enough for them to get off the planet. Trust me, that is what they want. Their goal is to get the fuck off this planet. And the way to do that is to keep everybody chill while they figure out how to do it. So they got to introduce this digital thing where they go. Guys, it's a digital amusement park you live in at. That's where you're going. That's where you're traveling. How about that? So that's what they got to do before they can just get out of here, because by the way, and I don't think they will get out of here. I think the ultimate folly of what they believe is they're going to go down with the ship just like everybody else, but in their mind, everybody's in their mind, they got to think this is all leading to something. So they're sitting around going. Listen, nobody's fixing any of these cities. They're not getting fixed. It's, you know, it crimes down in some of them, which is great, but like I mean, like infrastructure, you know, it's they're not going to be vibrant cities anymore. We're just going to let them go. You know, the water's got high levels of bacteria, drinking water in a lot of areas isn't safe. That's not going to get better. RFK and Cheryl, I mean, did you see this is like fighting a yak. This was the guy who was going to try to help the food. The food's as bad as it's ever been. That was all fake. By the way, he was going to look into all of the vaccines in the food. He didn't do any of that. It's fake. So he's like on some summer vacation with Cheryl and some yak. He seems like on his Instagram. So I'm like, he's like, we did a 10 mile hike up the mountain and I saw a yak. And then I pushed the yak with my phone and it ran away. And you're like, Hey, man, weren't you supposed to like, I don't know. Like, ban the big goal for something. They've done nothing. But all they could do is just move us to European standards on the food. They've done none of that because the corporations, um, Trump's a junk food addict. He's, it's the junk food presidency and all the people that own the big, uh, food conglomerates. They're like, well, no, you're not banning. Should they banned one die is one red die? So none of it's getting fixed and the tech people are basically like, we just have to get out of here because, yeah, here we are. This is the health and human services secretary. This guy was going to fix the food. Sure. Did we get inside this thing? Maybe you should get inside the cage. Yeah, it's dangerous. Come on, honey, get up on the other side of that stuff. Get on the other side of this down wall. He's fighting a yak. All right. Get him out of here. So that's now what our country has become. Our country now, he's doing content. The secretary of health and human services is now doing content on social media with wild animals. He's now become some weird version of the crocodile hunter. He's now like, he's the Steve Irwin that we, we, we, we, we deserve. It's like, it's, so, so that's what it is. So the tech people, again, they know this thing's cooked and they're just looking for a way out. But before they can get that, everybody's got to like voluntarily go into this matrix control. They think only because like, everybody's just going to have to be well behaved because, you know, there's going to be a lot of reasons to not behave. That's, that's coming. There's going to be a lot of reasons to not behave like having no money, having no job, having not a lot of food and energy crisis. Like, there's a lot of reasons for people to take to the streets. What they got to do is I get people to do and something. They've got to get people doing something so that they're not out in the streets so that the tech people can just basically plan their escape because that's what they're trying to do. They believe that they believe they're trying to get off the planet. Merge with technology. Once they, once they merge with AI, it won't be that long. They go, once we have quantum computing, once AI is, you know, as smart as anything that's ever been times a million, then they'll be able to just get the fuck out of here. They go, because we'll, but we're going to merge with this AI. Otherwise, they say, I would just get rid of us and then leave. We're going to merge with it so that we, and this is mask, all these guys want this. We're going to merge with this intelligence so that we then have it and we can get the fuck out of the touch and then leave the people here on this rotted bacteria, you know, planet of shit oceans and smog and wildfire smoke and hell and lettuce and Taco Bell causing diarrhea and everything. They, they know that this is what it, it like this is most of the stories this summer has been about shit. They've been about shit. They're shit in the ocean. People can't stop shitting because of the food they're eating. Most of the stories this summer have been about fecal matter, most of them. And they know, they, they know that the planet is turning to literal shit, literal shit, not a metaphor and the tag people know that. So they just go, listen, they're all going to eat these burritos and shit themselves and then there's going to be shit in a water and they're going to go swimming as shit. And we just got to give these people fucking some fucking meta glasses or whatever and just let them sit on their couch and they can shit themselves and they can watch the world cup through their meta glasses because we're getting the fuck out of here. That is what they're doing. We're getting the fuck out of dodge. So put your meta glasses on, sit on the couch and shit yourself and watch the world cup because we are getting the fuck out of here. That's what they're doing. That's 100% what they're doing. You know, I mean, it's the summer of diarrhea. This is the summer of uncontrollable shit. This is the summer of people not being able to control their ass. That's what it is. This is not the sexy summer. This is a shit summer brought to you by Taco Bell and then whoever is dumping all of that shit in the ocean, the people are trying to swim in. It's almost like invading Iran. It's almost like it's the only story that wouldn't involve literal human shit. So that's the kind of summer we're having in America and the people know the people know what it is. They know what it is. They know what's going on here. We're announcing a few new dates in the fall Tim Dylan comedy.com. Enjoy folks. Enjoy your week. Swim in the shit. Just go swim in the shit because your family won't know the difference and maybe one of them dies, but you can't afford them anyway. Swim in the shit water. And if one of your children dies, it'll be a tragedy, but you'll you'll back to school shop. It will be a lot easier. Anyway, that's our statement. That's our that's our hopeful take for you and see you next week.

Podcast Summary

Key Points:

  1. Lindsey Graham's death is discussed with speculation ranging from a heart attack to Russian involvement, with the host preferring a dramatic narrative involving a drone facility in Ukraine.
  2. The host criticizes Trump and JD Vance for claiming electoral fraud despite holding power, and mocks Vance's detached commentary on issues like Epstein files.
  3. Jeffrey Epstein's activities, including alleged eugenics projects at his New Mexico ranch and obstruction by the Justice Department, are highlighted as unresolved and suspicious.
  4. The host predicts a US military escalation in Iran, including potential ground troops or nuclear strikes, arguing war is ineffective and China will emerge as a global leader through economic and digital dominance.
  5. Environmental degradation, such as bacteria-filled beaches, is linked to a broader tech elite plan to escape Earth via digital pacification and AI integration.

Summary:

The host opens with the sudden death of Senator Lindsey Graham, dismissing official reports of chest pains and speculating he was killed by Russia while touring a Ukrainian drone factory. He paints Graham as a closeted warmonger who reveled in war machinery, even suggesting he was sexually aroused by the drones, and hypothesizes Trump may have secretly ordered his assassination to appease Putin. The discussion shifts to Trump and Vance, criticizing them for claiming election fraud despite controlling all branches of government.

The host mocks Vance's podcast appearances where he downplays the Epstein scandal while admitting to conspiracies, and highlights Epstein's alleged eugenics experiments and forced pregnancies at his New Mexico ranch, noting Justice Department obstruction. He then predicts an imminent US invasion of Iran, possibly using nuclear weapons, arguing that traditional warfare is obsolete and will bankrupt America while China, through economic investment and digital surveillance, becomes the world's dominant power. The host ties environmental collapse—like fecal bacteria closing beaches—to a tech elite’s plan to pacify the masses with virtual reality and AI, allowing them to escape Earth.

He ends with a cynical note on the "summer of shit," urging listeners to accept the decay, and promotes his comedy tour.

FAQs

The transcription is satirical and speculative. It claims Lindsey Graham died after chest pains, but also jokes about Russia possibly poisoning him or blowing up a drone facility he was inspecting.

The speaker repeatedly says 'I love these drones,' describing them as big, hard, and capable of killing bad people, though the tone is ironic and exaggerated.

The speaker criticizes Trump for claiming elections are stolen while Republicans currently hold the presidency, Congress, and Supreme Court, calling it contradictory.

The speaker mocks JD Vance for saying he read the Epstein files but believes there was a larger conspiracy, while doing nothing as vice president.

The speaker predicts Trump will likely expand military operations in Iran, potentially using ground troops or nukes, and suggests this could lead to U.S. collapse and China emerging as a superpower.

The speaker says China has realized war doesn't work and is instead spreading money and building a digital surveillance grid, which will make it the future world leader.

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