154: 4 Pieces of Gum with Are You Garbage? | Soder Podcast | EP 149

Hey, everybody. Hope you enjoyed the podcast this week. I'm on the road this Friday and Saturday, Hartford Funnybone, 18th and 19th. Four shows, all tickets available at dancudder.com, and then October 2nd and 3rd. I'm going to be coming to Albuquerque, New Mexico, Cousadas, doing four shows there, dancudder.com for those tickets as well. I'll see you on the road. I'm really excited. The hour's coming together. Have a hell of a time. Enjoy the podcast. Hope you're having a good week. It's all I got. Hope you're doing good. So much. So much. Yeah. Sorry. I blazed so much. Cron. You blazed in Cron. Was like such a ninth grade. You blazed Cron. You guys can't. Sorry. You guys can't handle the fact that I blazed so much. Cron. We call it kind of bad. Yeah. KB. KB. You got some KB. So wait. You're saying dropping it. I was like. Oh, but what's the call? What's the call? American garbage. American garbage on YouTube right now. How's that for a mother fucking pro? Oh. Your face. So you guys are dropping it. It's out now. It's out now. Um. That's it. Thanks a lot, everybody. Thanks. We'll be back. Absolutely. You guys know I'm the other one. Um. No. I was what you said. You're dropping it during an Eagles game. No, it's towards the end. You know, you just. You started to try to like you like. Oh, you guys do it. You did it half time. He's on the fan. These. That would be sick. If you guys dropped in on the link. Yeah. You guys are like unauthorized. Yeah. You know, he's ashamed to grease some palms. He could it. So we're going to run. We're going rogue. We're starting. We're starting at Citizen Bank. Yeah. And then we're going to fan in to the link. Get tackled by big dumb. That is. As you're getting tackled. You go. You grease ball. But I've always wanted to meet you. You seem cooler. Yeah. I like that. He goes on press now. Yeah. He's like personality. Yeah. What's going to. He's. Here's. Here's my thing about big DOM that I think is really smart. Sam would chop. For sure. That'll sell out forever. Yes. Card dealership if you want to. He wants it. Dom's use cars. Sure. We'll do numbers. Mm-hmm. Slightly used. Dom's slightly used. Yeah. No. No. Just like now. Just now. Just drive off the law. Really used. They drive off the law. Drive him right back on. He did. I think it's smart that he's burrowing himself in the organization. In case, Seriani gets fired. He's in there. Oh, yeah. No one's letting DOM go. You're going to fucking Minnesota. He's going to stick out like a sore thumb. Oh, my God. You know what I mean? He can't operate in Minnesota. Cardinals? Yeah. What would be the worst city for DOM that. It would be like the witness relocation. I'm trying to get a plate of ZD over it. Say no more. Oh. Indianapolis. That's really funny. There's. Yeah. Him just in like Chicago. He'd be fine. Maybe all right. Any major city. New York. New York. Green Bay. Dom in Green Bay. Freeze my prickle. Oh. But I do it. Man, how happy are you guys that football's back? Yeah. Jazz. College was great. College was awesome. Yeah, I just get things started. It's pretty much professional now, too. Yeah. It is. It's. It's all evened out now. The way they get NIL money. Come on. It's crazy. I love it. It's also funny because the SEC, you go. Oh, so you were just cheating. Yeah. Pretty much. The SEC football just means mold. Mm-hmm. Well, I love it more. And it goes, well, how come now you guys can't win national championships that everyone's paying fairly? Very expensive. Well, I do declare. Oh, well, the Yankees from the malls have some sort of potion. They give these. You'd have to ask your man, Mondami about that. Hell, your little socialist, your little Communist mayor. I think about him at night when I'm on my porch. It wasn't for Bernie Sanders. We'd still be winning championships. Oh, I think I see a correlation. Yeah. That would be fun to grow up like that, though. Yeah. Cause you see SEC girls when they show like the SEC games you go. What? Yeah. What? Why didn't you go there? I was too. I don't know. Are they good schools? I don't know. It gives you shit. I don't know. Alabama. Dude, my buddy's sister went to Alabama and she's like a couple years younger than us. And then like, we were like, it was like when Instagram hit and we were just like, she'd be like at a party and I'm like, this looks like you're a swimsuit fucking event. It's crazy. And I went to Arizona. And everyone's like, oh, Arizona. Arizona is good though. It's not bad. They were in the sports or the play was a playboy. Playboys. That's a difference. That's Arizona State. Oh. And Arizona could party. Cause there's a lot of coke at Arizona. It's Arizona. The state of Arizona has a lot of cocaine. Arizona state hat. Hotter. Dumber. Women. Mm. Arizona is talking. Arizona's got big dumb with it. Right. So did Sammy the bull grovano. That's where he went. That's where a lot of people went. I heard he pledged teeth. Yeah. I think this guy. You girls tried his jungle juice. Yeah. He makes my mouth red. Oh, as red as I made that gobbled from the family. Oh. When I did him at Spark Steakhouse. My name is Levinson. You have me misunderstood with somebody else. That is so funny him in a fucking ASU party. He's like, eh, I don't know. He's older brothers than being kind of mean. I don't know if they know. I'll turn on these sons of bitches. They say no raisins. I'm new equipment manager. How you doing? I'm saying me the bull grovano. You know what? Really nice on these boys. Pinky Rangers. Over their receiver gloves. Something with a little class. Wow. I understand the blacks. They look curious, much as the Italian. That's I'm talking. You got these cornerbacks. They're all black. Can I ask you this? I noticed something. I don't know. Can I ask you something to answer to my best friend? Is that your real name? Are we serious? Where are we at this? I'm sorry, we're lost. That's like what it's like hanging out the Robin Williams. Probably. Are you riffing with me? Are we just. Hey man, just fucking order. We're starving. Oh, jelly in the sandwich. Oh, jelly. Oh, jelly's shaking. Like a fat man. Dude, you're holding up the line. Hey, that y'all ran. Rob. I think I'll have a hot thought. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You're holding up the line. Rob. Does that? I noticed something on the coffee table out there. Yeah. He's got nervous. He got real nervous. I thought he was going to bring up the fact that I was. I thought you were going to call me gay for reading the book Dracula. No. That's hard, man. It is gay. Got twilight out there. Yeah. I'm working my way through this. Jordan Alvins. Yeah. Yeah. What's that all about? Katie. Really. I love my little crunchy lady, dude. That's my little. That's my little squirrel queen, dude. Is that right? Wow. Can she nibble through that? That is. Is she Greek? No. She's Italian and Irish. Wow. And she's just walking through that bag. Yeah. Shout out to her. Yeah. They are. You like them? I'm okay with them. Here's the thing. What? I think my. The crunch is so heavy. It's. Do you got to get through them? You got to. You need a tuba sense tonight after you go through a bag ahead of them. It's a tough chill. That's exactly my fucking thing. Yeah. That's how I feel. Yes. I. The crunch is to the impact. It's a lot. Then when you break them up, it's like you're crushing an Anderson window in doors. Smacked in your mouth. There. It's like bulletproof glass. But they're great. When she opened the bag, I had to like, angry eat them to get through the handful I got. I was like, "Fuck you." Gosh. That's great. That's a very classy sign of a very classy lady. Well, it's funny. It's classy ladies, I think, put them in little dishes. And leave them out. You put them in little shit. She's showing them like she's. Like she's in the bullpen. Yeah. Like, yeah. You guys, what is it? Bottom of six. She's gonna get in and she's have drunk. She just runners her in the corners. Goddamn, this guy's giving up everything. She spits the almonds out. She just goes for the crunch. Yeah. This sucks the cleaning. That's why I'm marrying her right there. I'll do that with a blowpop. If I have like three or four blowpops, I'll get down to the gum. It's a crazy number of blowpops, though. To leave the gum is almost crazy. Three or four has three or four blowpops. That's crazy. I like to crunch. Then I'll put them aside and then go for the gum and get four pieces of gum in the mouth at the same time. Okay. You see, you're a four piece of gum in the mouth. I love a four piece of gum. That's what that's the craziest part of that story to you. No, I was actually Bible with that. I think it's crazy to you. That's insane to me. I think you crunch and leave it is weird. You set it aside. That's almost like cereal killer behavior. And you're cooking. I'm not done yet. I'm gonna make you wait for me to finish you. Now watch me cutie your friends. That crunch. That sour apple is gonna get one. Take that watermelon. But I, she always freaks out because she loves gum and so sometimes I'll buy gum, but I chew like. I crush it. Three or four pieces at a time. In the minimum. That's the man's way, right? Yes. I don't know that. And it was always, I was thinking about this the other day because I was pop. I was like four pieces of gum at a time in a car. Especially I'm like, I got the whole family in the car. I'm like, I'm in full that most. Yeah. But that and multiple slices of pizza as a young kid was always reserved for a dad. Like to me, it was like, adults are minimum two slices. Kids, you try his life. Do you want a second slice? Should I remember being like, when you start pulling out no crust bullshit? Serve me two slices. Yeah. And you got to eat your crust if you want to move. That's why you're not getting through. Yeah. But the multiple gum, can I tell you that? That was dead shit. The way you guys are making me feel so more sane. For the amount of. Just call me. We'll do this all day long. Yeah. I chew gum four at a time. Crush them always. And I get rid of them quicker too. I go, re up. I go, I get older. I can have a packet of gum. Here's the thing. Make sure your jaw feels strong. It's not for the gum then. It's for the gum in 20 minutes. Because the one piece in 20 minutes. Okay. That's like. Revives everything. It's disintegrating. No, but I'm just saying it shrinks down. You lose it. Oh, see what I'm doing is going like three. Okay. And then I press it. I toss. compression, and then they all they all you want to hear some real gross. Yeah, if you put that like glass of water and pop that gum back in your mouth, it refreshes a complete. I love the science. I love. It's always heavy. I have the science of it. I love the way your mind works, because I'm absolutely going to do that. You put it. Hey, me my bubble gum in my water. I need my refreshing water. It's like dentures. Yeah, right. And then, but then it runs out faster too. Of course, on the second run. Yeah, I was saying I never get the legs don't hold. That's like a boxer's been knocked out. Yeah, it's going to happen again. Go right back down. Well, CT gum. But the special is out now on YouTube on our YouTube channel. Do you guys feel you've been doing the podcast now for a hundred years? Six years. Yeah. Yeah, 2021 or 2020, 2020. Yeah, fuck. Two weeks before the pandemic, we started. That's crazy. It only feels like two huge losers as we were of like just struggling trying to figure it out. So many failed projects. I'm like, oh, we're going to do this short series. We'll do this. We'll do a little YouTube channel. Do the podcast. The play we did London. 17 years running music for West End did not appreciate it. Those critics are garbage. Wow. That's how we think of it. Say that again. And you're buying new garbage. And he goes, these critics are garbage. And they go, but are you? What are you? Are we? What was that Kevin? It was just this thing. We were like, it was like, we started it. And I remember we were like, I think we banged like two or three episodes. And then we were walking out. I think it was with, I want to say it was like Jared Frees. Like, so what do you think about this whole, uh, where in a mask, flute type thing? They got going. I don't like get out of here. I know, I don't be done in a week. And then because living in New York specifically, it was always like, there's a mola. And you're like, if something you were worried about like once every two years, is this going to hit? Honestly, I've seen more panic for that, uh, that cruise virus. I've seen them freak out more than that than when COVID hit. Yeah. For sure. Yeah. But you guys did it. And it's awesome. But thank you. But at that moment, I'm like, Oh, dude, we're like, this is fate saying we're never going to be successful. Like the universe is stepping in and going. Nah, guys. So that leads me into exactly the question I wanted to ask, whereas there are a moment that now you guys have done so well, and people love you so much that you have to like do garbage stuff for you. Go like, I'm not really like that anymore. You know, like a little bit, but I got, I got, I don't know, I got a, I got a above ground. I got like one of those blow above ground pools for my backyard. So they got like 200 bucks or whatever. Uh, and like I said, it's a lopsided. It turned green a couple of times. It was like, and I like sent a picture to my boys. I'm like, I was so stoked. I like filled it up. I'm like, I'm fucking getting in this pool tonight. It was a heat wave. I'm like, this is sick. And I sent it to like my group chat of like my boys from like outside of comedy and they were like, dude, you genuinely still live this every day. Yeah. Oh, they like it. Yeah. They're like, this is you're such a dirt bag. Yeah. I was wondering if you guys are like the rappers that still go back to the hood. It's also selling dime bag. That's what I mean. You're red man crossing the wires on crib. That's how you ring my door. I got a dollar box. I know you're actually like, are we different people? Like, you know, did I want to blow all my money on drugs? No. I did it for the show. Did I want to go through a public messy divorce, lose my home and end up living in Ian basement? No. I didn't want to do that. You for the show. It's all it's all it's all it's all for you live on the podcast set. I live on the podcast set. Right. No, I live in the bedroom. Okay. But I'm right in the middle of the show business. Yeah. Living with Ian down down in the basement. You're in a firehouse. I've just like it's pretty good downstairs. We're like, we got one. We got a four alarm fire. There's a lot of ghost buster stuff around. It's heavy ghost busters. Yeah. The cats are fantastic. That's fun. I'm Aunt Henry. Yeah. Yeah. He's daddy. It's a lot of fun. It actually is. It's the first time I've lived with somebody where they wanted me there. Yeah. What did he do that way? Yeah. He likes having me around. That's crazy. What does it say about your personality? You're 15. You're finally like, yeah, somebody can tolerate it. Right. It is. A possibly mentally ill friend that I do very well around. Possibly huge. You know, possibly he is. I love Ian. He's the best. Ian is always out of a cannon. Is there ever like, do you ever see like slow mo Ian? Like we don't see each other that much because he's on the road. Great. You know, we're traveling, be popping back and forth. Great. You know, it's funny. As I thought about you and I, because I got back last night and he got back last night. I felt like I was like, we're like Vecchio and it's odor. It was the best. We're less funny, but we're like Vecchio and it's not just as even funnier. We, that's all what we always loved about it was people are like, you live with a grown man and you go, not really. We don't ever see each other because a lot of times what would happen is the weekends, I would be off. He'd be on the road and the weekends, he'd be off. I'd be on the road. So it's just you had your own apartment. Yeah. And it was always like you get excited. Oh, it's all you can link up. Yeah. Oh, Sunday's coming and I'd like text him like, when you land this, this football games all exact same thing last night. Yeah. And you go, do you want to eat pizza? We should eat in like Vecchio and you know, he eats like that man. He only has like vegetables and stuff that'll help him fight crime. But carrots, good for your eyes. Sometimes they can blend into the dark now with carrots, but he'll, uh, but Sundays, I'd be like, we're going to get a let go. We're going to get a grandma slice and a million lines. That was always awesome. So that's what I'd miss. We linked, we linked up and we walked to the, we walked to the deli, get a gatorade, chew the fat about the weekend, what happened is talking shit. Yeah, a lot of shit being taught over there. And they're in at you, Baldi. I'm sure I was on the receiving it. Never, never. Pretty bad. Yeah, there's a real quiet walk over here. See, that's what he thinks. I sing his praises. You don't want, you don't want to be in my house last night. He talks shit. The cats were running their fucking mouth. I said, you're a good guy. Me and you're defending you. These cats are meowing about how big of a bitch you are. Yeah, I always wondered like, 'cause he needs. How big of a bitch right now? How like do we, when you have a podcast based on like having shitty tastes? It's, well, like, this is, you know, we've, it's, money doesn't change it. If anything, money exasperates it, like, case in point, you can make a bunch of money and end up living in the basement. Like, I could, you know, I could get a real pool, but I'm like, nah, this was 200 bucks. And it's like, it's out of, yeah, I don't have to worry about it. And it's mine for him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's in you. It's in you. I may be my kid will be a little better, but it's going to be in him. I also love that about your podcast is finding out how much people have that in them. It's in every, yeah. You're talking to people that are successful and they go, like, I still do trash. Yeah. Yeah. I was talking about eating burger king on Stavis podcast and people were DM and me being like, I knew you're still a piece of shit. Oh, yeah. It's in you. I'll go eat fucking, I'll go eat rest, stop food. Yeah. I, I seek it out. Yeah, I don't think food. What do you like at the king chicken sandwich whopper junior school over one? Yeah, gentlemen, long one. It's such a, it's such a, there's such a funny on running, oh, I'm going to ask you. No, I know, it's just, I mean, that was just talking about the premise of, I don't know why, but Burger King comes up. He's a big Burger King guy. We've talked about on the show. All, I mean, so much. Yeah, yeah. So much, obviously. But then on this, like, last podcast run, we've done like 10,000 pike and I'm like, before the podcast, I'm sort of, he goes, I got this new theory on Burger King. And it's a theory. He's been pushing for five years. And it's a great theory. I'm on board with the theory, but he keeps pushing it to me on air and I have to go, yeah, you know, I have to like, yes, and I'm like, yeah, I think I haven't heard this before. The country's the coolest one, Burger King and Pepsi are at the, are in the forefront of pop culture. You can look back throughout history. But then one of the producers did and was like, poked, poked a lot on some show, we're on. This is a, by the way, let me, let me establish for this. And I don't mean to overstep, this isn't a theory based on feelings. Yes. Oh, no, for sure. Which we, which we corrected them, because I have, when Burger King and Pepsi are having moments, the pot in pop culture, he's saying the vibes, we're doing okay. Yeah. Michael Jackson, Pepsi, Pepsi. Burger King was huge. That's a win for you guys. Your scale is a little upside. I'm sorry. The charts were flooded with amazing songs. Yeah. Some kids had to lay on their swords. And by swords in early, but I think there's something to this 100%. I've been a Burger King guy that's been forced into a life of McDonald's. And I enjoy McDonald's. I love Mickey D's, but I love getting a Burger King and people are very adamant that I'm wrong about that. Well, Burger King has done it to themselves now. Burger, it's not as good as it has been. And I, I, I really think I get, if I could get to CEO in a room, I could straighten this guy out of the bars of money off him. If someone works in any way for Burger King, I've been saying this for a month, because I'm going to tell you right now, I think corporations, specifically in entertainment and in food and beverage are spinning right now. This is damn dude. Fuck you. I think they're spinning. This is a fucking economist soda just checked in. What sector are you guys currently heavily invested in? I'm telling you right now, because they keep going to influencers. They keep going to influencers, right? And when a company turns it around, it's always because they took a fan that loved it. Regular guy. A regular guy, and they bring them in. Well, I don't get cooking all of them. Give them some real feedback. Yeah, because if you let you bring folian and he's fucking changes those stuff up on Burger King's fries, go back to being just as good as McDonald's, you keep your hand burgers sloppy. Lose the crispy jalapenos and the fried onions. What are we doing? Get out of here. What are you doing? Take my ideas to Columbus, Ohio, for a couple of weeks, shout out to Test City, and see what the focus group says. See what the kids start saying. I would honestly put your knowledge, I'd put my money on your knowledge that you could correct the shit. Thank you. I'd go let him drive for a little bit. Nobody got to lose Burger King. Because you're insurance paid up, you're going to bang that thing up a little bit. Great though, because if you're risking it, what are they called stress test? Taffer this thing, we're having a stress test. Get it in there, all new menu, learn it today, let's go. What's one of the most popular things in appetizers at casual dining restaurants these days that everyone's talking about? Two things, the smash burger, and the slider. Sliders are big. What's the original slider? Pimp? Pimp, you're done. All right. Burger buddies. You remember the burger buddies in the little box? Why are we doing burger buddies? You're focused on the Texas barbecue whopper with the jalapenos. Get the fuck out of here with that shit. So where's the king at? Where's the king? He was in NFL commercials, he was all over the place, popping up with Michael Myers. He was great. That was 20 years ago. Need to redo him. We got through an unnecessary war because of the king. Yeah. You got us through Iraq. He was up in every commercial. Thank you for his service, obviously. He watched that up to the king. Honestly, thank you for serving democracy. That's a good people of this country. Thank you. I want to thank the king for serving democracy. They had him on all the bases over there in Iraq, too. But did they? Yeah. Keep our boards fighting. Yeah. Gotta keep them fed. McDonald's just feels like an old rich guy that doesn't care. They're almost admitting that they're there for the real estate. Their hearts aren't in it. But there's something McDonald's has done in the last six months is last summer they had this gold sauce, which was phenomenal. If you can't, you win. For the Olympics. It was unbelievable. I never put that together. All the times we've talked about it. Is that what it was from? Seriously? Oh. Yeah. No, either of we. That's the summer Olympics. You know what their new sauce is now? What? You're ready for lazy. That was this summer. That was this summer, the Olympics. Yeah. No, this was last summer. They had a gold sauce. It was good on everything. You put it on chicken beef. What? It didn't matter. I don't know. - It's all around us. - You're playing, man. - Well, it's in the boots you're walking in, right? - It's on your shirt, your mustache, your hair, your fat animal, the bitch. - It's on your shirt. - It was like a Chick-fil-A sauce. That'd be the best way I could describe it. You know what they did this summer? You know it was the big effort over at McDonald's. - Me out. - Caesar. - Get out of here. - Okay. - Caesar's been around forever. - Caesar is the hot new dip in sauce. They're trying to dress up a snack wrap with fucking Caesar. - 'Cause also-- - What? - This is what happened with the pizza game, Papa John's before they were dropping end bombs. - Sure. - Allegedly. - No, it's on-- (laughing) - No, they got that shit recorded. - No, I don't-- - We don't have the internet. - The garlic sauce. - Sure. - Ooh. - Then everyone else started doing it. And then they tried to change it up and it's not see-through anymore. Now, it's like this weird thing. - Cloudy hair. - Almost like a-- - Separate it, yeah, it's strange. - No, I want it where it was like see-through and you're like, oh damn, this is some hot-- Oh, man, that garlic sauce was fucking great. - It putter more butter base to it. - Yeah, but again, they got away from it. 'Cause they get green, they're cut in corners. (chirping) This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Hey, you know me, I talk about therapy. I don't shove it in your face. I don't make it, I'm just letting you know. If your brain feels like it's running hot, maybe go talk to somebody. It really does help. 'Cause you talk to somebody and then they go, do you ever thought of this? And you go, no, I didn't think of that. And then all of a sudden, you have a solution for a problem that maybe has been hurt in your brain. Try BetterHelp. BetterHelp. That will help you find a therapist. Really gets you. It's focused is on emotional well-being with thousands of therapists. Millions of members in over 100, hundreds of countries. (laughing) It's over 100 countries, but it's just fun to say, I don't even think there are 200 countries. Are there, this is one of those things where you go, Dan, why are you talking, you're dumb. And I'll discuss this in therapy next week. But if you need therapy, I think you should try it out. Check out BetterHelp. They can connect you to a therapist that you can do online or in person. If you're not vibing with that, I used vibing my 40s. That makes me want to go to therapy even more. I'm just saying, you need to go talk to somebody, BetterHelp is there to connect you with someone. And if you sign up, you get 10% off at BetterHelp.com/Sotar. That's BetterHelpHOP.com/Sotar. Go, go, go, try it. Factor meals, baby, it's turning into fall and winter. So here's my long-term plan 'cause I was a real fat mess this summer. 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Head to factor meals.com/soder50off. Use the code "soder50off" to get 50% off in one free breakfast item per box for one year while supplies last until 1031.26. That's code "soder50off" at factor meals.com. Soder50off@factor meals.com. See you website for more details. - I have a question about this. I don't see, I've never been a big fast food guy. Do you think who, from the service level, is there not love it? Is it prepared? Is there anybody consistently preparing it poorly? Where you get it and you're like this-- - McDonald's. - McDonald's is prepared. - Oh, I got to Mickey D's on 21st over in a story that'll blow you around. - At the smallest samples. I'm talking about consistent, 'cause what I do is-- - Who's really dropping the ball? - McDonald's. - Really? - McDonald's across the board. - Across the board because what they're doing now is-- - Yeah, you might have rose color. You love you, something McDonald's. - That McDonald's, by my old apartment. - You find a good one, it makes it all okay. It's like-- - But that's managers, that's top down. - That's an individual store. Because now what they're doing with a lot of McDonald's is you can't even order through a person. You gotta go to a screen. - I'm not doing that. - And then they just come out and give you a number. And there's no-- - They are? - No. - That's a, that's a, that's a data set. I'm not going to a data set, they're gonna fuck it. - They're gonna make a data right now. - So this isn't a data set or this is just a touch screen menu. - Who's not a water? - You're throwing a scene. Sir, I can't, I can't tell you this enough. This is not a data set or something. - Dude, I have a thing with a Wawa switch to the touch screens. Probably late '90s, there was a revolution there. - I've only known Wawa for the touch screen. - To my buddy's dad, we saw him in there. He's fucking hot head, temper. And if I'm going to Wawa for 50 years, and all of a sudden he can't just go get a short of you. He's got to fucking type it in on a touch screen. Like, at that, I gotta spell to get lunch. - He was so confused and so angry, and they were like trying to help him. They were like, we can't take your order. It's gotta go through this. - We need the ticket. - And dude, at one point, he just brought, we were in the chip aisle. He just breaks down and goes, I'm not a dumb man. - And we're like, what the fuck? - He didn't just snap and left. - Yes, man, why can't we fix that? - But there also is like, there was something nice about ordering. - Hey, let me get a number one. - Wawa used to be a place you'd go, you would get your like, you get a Delhi, like let me get a half a pound of American sliced, we get our lunch meets there. - Yeah. - And now it's so fucking-- - Now it really-- - A Fendi machine. - I don't like when they go, like, don't talk to us anymore. - We're just, but we're just bots back. - Yeah, don't talk to us anymore. And you go, fuck, what about that human experience? - Yeah. - Well, Wawa does have that. You go to the coffee, you know, and they have somebody just work in the coffee pots keeping them fill. And they'll hit you with, hey, are you done? Did you catch the game and then we're going to go back? - Everything's broken. No one's saying hi to each other anymore. No one's even just-- - Especially in New York. - Commissar New York. I live in this building. No one says hello to me. - I could imagine. - You just go, hey, how you doing? And they go, and then you go free. Oh, I don't ever want to say hi to anybody. - I don't even really see it that the other day. - The second I go, hey, how are you? And they go. - 'Cause for us, that's so, like, I'm putting myself out of your van and you're, yeah. - We're locked in a box for 20 floors. How fucking do I kill you? How do you do at the airport if somebody is laid for their flight and they got to go through the line? - Oh, no. - 'Cause you don't even go. - No, if they say, hey, thanks, I'm so sorry. - That's great, yeah. I do that all the time. I'm nicely shit to everybody. When we were leaving LA, it was, for Labor Day, it was jammed up. And the traffic was jammed up. And I was running late for the plane. At first time in my life, I'm late for a plane. I had to do that. And some of these people were such, I was just one guy, I almost stopped turning around a bunch of him in his fucking face. He was such a dick about it. - What'd he say? - Nothing. - That was the problem. - I was like, "Hey, man, I'm so sorry. I'm late to my first time." And he's like, "Oh, I was like, yeah?" - Yeah, people that get up and do you like that? - I've had to do it. - That's all I did. - I give him moments of inspiration. I go, "Hey, go get her." And sometimes they go, "What?" - Oh, that's great. - That's good. - There I go. You're gonna get that from me. - Sure you left me. I'm just late for the plane. - There I go. Okay, oh God. Don't get yourself, but I do that 'cause I do that when I'm walking the dog in New York, other dogs. There's horrible dog owners in New York, so. - No, I have to be, no, I think we're gonna say horrible dog. I have a reactive dog and I have to be a very, I am probably one of the best dog owners. You have to, if you, I'm walking around with a fucking bazooka, he's a pipple. I got a fucking, so like, I'm seeing three, I got by me, my character's on three, four blocks ahead. - You got a gun named at everybody. It's not loaded. It's not loaded. - It's not loaded. - It's not loaded. - No friendly. - I'm just walking through, you go, safety is on. - And then every now and then I just let one pop though. It's like, you know, this is my name, everybody's scattered. - I got eight more. - No, but you guys, like, I'll get on the other side of cars. So there is no incident. - So my problem isn't with that. My problem is with people who don't pay attention to their dog are looking at their phone. - Crazy. - While they walk their dog. And a lot of the times it's the small dogs that just start yipping. I mean, you're going through it now that you have it. It's like, they start yipping and sometimes they'll lurch or whatever and I got Myrtle. And she's fine. She's like the sweetest dog in the world. She never has a problem with any dogs. But the new thing I do instead of getting mad about it is I'll go, what did you call the Myrtle? Like, as they do that, I go, I go, damn, what did you say? Like that? And how many people don't have a sense of humor about it? - Yeah. - How many people go like that? And you're like, it's your dog. Your dog's being the problem because I want to be a dickhead. I want to be like, it's fucking, or if it's a tiny dog I go, a little Napoleon complex. - Yeah, a little Napoleon, a little like that. But it's a fun way. I found out that talking shit and just being funny instead of being a dick goes a lot farther. - When I say to my dogs, we're walking, if we're coming up on another, it's dogs, his size are bigger. So we're crossing less. Yeah, he's, he doesn't go way at their smaller dog. He wants, he's in for the fight. - All right. - So as we're walking up, I hit him with the training day. I go, you want to go home or you want to go to jail? How the fuck are you playing this day? You want to go home or you want to go to jail? What's up to you? Yeah, these tiny dogs that want to bark and murder I always go, damn, wrong side of the bed. I'll just say something like that. I go, he's so tiny, but he's so ferocious. And the owners are never like, yeah, occasionally there. But that's what bums me out. You'd expect more of them to be like. - I'll also hit, if they're, if I see their dogs also a little fucking kooky patooky. And I got my guy too and we're, you know, we're staying on it, they're hitting them with the treats or whatever we're doing to keep them locked in. As we get past, go, good job everybody. - Great. - I go, good job everybody, all four of 'em. - Great line. - I go, good job everybody, live to fight another day. - Great. - Yeah. - Great line. - Sometimes they like it, sometimes they don't. But they're trying, we're trying out here. - Yeah. - What do you do when you see a muzzle dog? - My dog's borderline muzzle dog. - Really? He could be. - We were, this happened to Katie and I. We took a little, there's like a nice park by Chelsea Pierce. And we went, and this dog was like chasing another dog. And it was like, I don't want to say a pit. It was like a mix, short little fat dog, but it was a mutt. And it was running and it ran under our legs on the bench. And it came back out and it bit my gene. - Jesus. - It bit the bottom of my gene was baggy. So it just got gene, and then I went, whoa, whoa, whoa. And it was this really old woman and one of those walkers that you could sit down on. And she sit in there and she was like, come here, come here. Just scream me at the dog. She's like, you don't do that. And she put a muzzle on it. And I go, damn, that's a muzzle dog. - And you just get it done muzzled? - And you just let it go raw dog? - Yeah, that's why. - This is raw dog in the park. - Good thing I had my skinny jeans on. - Oh, dude, God, I was wearing big and baggy. God, I was taking it back to 98, because it just got gene. But what's funny is the muzzle dogs started coming back around. And Katie was like, you forgave this dog in your head so fast that the muzzle dog was pushing its head against me and I go, it's nuzzling against me. And then Katie noticed it was trying to get it done all day. - Trying to get it done all day. The whole time I go, look, it's nuzzling me. She goes, I love you. You're so sweet. That dog's trying to get some mask off. I'm just gonna bite you again. - So it's got that screw out. - You didn't really do it. - Yeah. - And that's when I was like, oh, shit. Oh, shit. - He's got a dime. He's unscrewed the screw. And he's like, yeah, buddy, I really like you. I'm gonna fuck you shit out. - Yeah, I like this jeans in his face. - And that was when I was like, oh, I don't know, shit. I really was like, oh, this guy feels bad. He bit me earlier. And he's like, yeah, I feel bad. He didn't even get me flush. - I'm sorry, Dan, I didn't mean to bite you. - Come here, son of a bitch. God, I can't tell you this time. And I'm not gonna let go. What do you think his old woman's gonna do? - Shit. I'm trying to be old bag. I'm working over here. - Which perfect segue to the thing I wanted to talk to you two about. Have you read the news story about this man that this Friday is gonna-- - I'll stop you there now. - I'm gonna fight a chimpanzee. - Wow, I saw a tweet. Is that real? - Yeah, I looked at it. - What country is this in? - Cole Johnson, it's an American. It's an American man. I think he's in Minnesota. - Cole Johnson. - His name's Cole Johnson. - He's an American man. - Am I sure to fight? - Mixed martial art. - What do you think he's professional? - I don't know. I thought he was a person. - What do they do to the chimpanzee? And is the chimpanzee a trained fighter? - Ooh. (laughing) - He's got three years of jujitsu. - He's going, yeah, he's at Tiger Shulks. (laughing) I think he's an instructor. He's fighting out of the jungle. It's a mixed martial art. Cole Johnson. It's gonna-- - Does it a random chimpanzee or do they have, they got him already one? - I don't. - But I don't know his name. It's always, it's got to be something funny too. Like it's like a bobo or something. - Mr. Marble. (laughing) - I've got to fight Hong Kong September 11th. - I mean, you're doing it on September 11th. - Oh, it's for the America. I mean, I can't, I'm never gonna forget that. I'll take it that far. (laughing) - No, you know what I mean? - Like Cole Johnson's never gonna forget that time. He got his ball sack ripped off by a chimpanzee. - With ease, dude. When his nose gets taken from him, like an uncle. - He wearing any sort of, he put a mask on him or something. - Now, according to Bloody Elbow, the match is reportedly-- - It's like the, you know, the fine reporting of Bloody Elbow. - The authority on chimpanzee fights. - He said in a video he believed he could beat a chimpanzee. He later discussed the proposed fight during an interview, during the interview to ask him about whether he was gonna fight the chimpanzee and he said yes. And then he was asked whether the fight with the chimpanzee was actually gonna fight the animal. He said that it was originally made as a joke and then someone showed up and it was like, "Have about $500,000." And he's like, "I'll do it for that." So he's garbage. - Mm-hmm. - I got the chimpanzee's probably holding out for someone bigger. 'Cause people are like, "We can get you Tyson. I think we can get you Tyson." - One of the Paul brothers. - Yeah. - The stereo flyer also is one of the chimps arguing for A side of a B side split. He goes, "I'm the chimp." People aren't, people aren't excited that I'm fighting Cole Johnson. People are excited. - This guy's a diamond dozen. - That he's fighting Mr. Tuxedo. - Yeah. - And I'm gonna fucking rip his fingers off like jumbo shrimp. - How big are chimps? - Dude. - Dude. - It doesn't matter. - No, I know, I'm just saying. - It still ripped you apart. - But they're like shorter, right? In my head, I don't know. - So then the money guy dried up and then Johnson said he then told everyone that he could not fight the chimpanzee anymore but then received another offer for even more money and he said it's on. He said there will be tranquilizers present. - Tranquilizers. - Tranquilizers. - Okay. - And he said he didn't punch him. - He said he wants to go against the wild animal to test himself. - That's crazy. - He's gonna get killed. - Yeah. - He wants to test how fast he can bleed out. - So I read two articles on this. And one of the articles reacted where they reached out to animal rights activists and they were like obviously we're against this. - Wait, you guys want to statement from us. - Yeah we're against it. - Do you think there's two chicks? - No, where do you guys fall on this? - Fighting an animal that doesn't. But then the other thing is they like reached out to scientists that work with chimpanzees and they were like, hey, I can't stress how bad from the age of 20. (laughing) All the scientists in a second, the first sort of go to-- - Did a picture of taking their feet, what? (laughing) - They almost, they're quotes read like that. Like they were like, they were like, hey, hey, hey. So how they socialize? This is just a bad eye, 'cause they're like, they're actually polite towards humans until they perceive something as a threat. And then it's a real, or they haven't had their brows. - I don't know. - Just like whatever, do you just imagine like the anxiety that chimpanzee's gonna start? Once it starts to calculate, well this is weird. These, there's a lot of people here. He's good when he starts going, what the fuck is going on? - All right, then I'm wearing a weird sort of costume. - Yeah. - I make it. - These chicks and bikinis with these big cards and they're like, what are these? Is that food? Are they showing me food? - Yeah, and he just starts fucking short-serving teeth. Let him know. - What the hell's going on in here? - Didn't have a guy come up to you like this and he goes, he's gonna take one or two and be like, wait. - He's a maccon fighter. - Sir, I don't wanna fight you, please. Step away. - He's absolutely next. - He's looking at his corner. What's this guy's fucking deal? - I'll take one to give two. That's all I've given. Dude, but the second that it's on, it's gonna be like, yeah dude. And that guy's gonna go, that was actually really cool. And also-- - I think, I actually have no idea. That guy's just gonna be immediately like, try to go outside, try to go outside. Like it's not, I don't think this guy understands that this isn't like the monkey's not gonna stop. - Yeah, no, he's probably not a technical fighter. - He's not a surgeon. - He's not angling for an arm. No, he's going to stick his hand in your mouth and rip your face off. It's crazy. Well, it's gonna hurt rebound. I just thought of that. Like say he does try to like say Cody, what's his name, Johnson Jones? Yeah. Try to like just whatever they say they're grappling because I'm going to arm borrow. Like that chimp doesn't know that. Rip his cock off over. That's what's in there. Chimp doesn't know like, just call man. Like, what am I going to do? He's going to go like, you're fucking eyeballs. That's like an over the pants. Cockroof. That's like the chimp's going to be tapping out. You got me. Yeah, like it's like good form. Yeah. By the way, Cody Jones is just going to go take it and then start hitting them with the other one. Ah, ah, ah, ah. And they probably do it. If you have these, you're fucked. Oh, man. There might be a, I might have to. Are they doing, can we go the stream? I'd want to watch that on stream. What I want to say right now is, I might have to record a separate video as a warning to this podcast because this could go so bad that it's just me shaving with the haircut. And I go, hey, everybody had a great time with Kevin and Foley on the podcast. Unfortunately. That man did die. Yeah. And we said a lot of funny things, not knowing that he was going to die, but we didn't warn him. Yeah, I don't know. I want to watch. I want to see. Let me see if we can do it. There's no way that happens. There's no way that's going to be legally allowed to proceed in the United States. They're going to have to do it like on a boat in international order. I was just thinking of that. Oh, old school. JT Barnum. I mean, this is all within the last 20 Yahoo sports. Hmm. Pay-per-view fight. This is on Yahoo Sports. This isn't bloody elbow and no knock on their journalism. No. I think there's a lot of good work. I haven't heard there for a couple Edward Armour. Oh, yeah. And I hope that they've had it. And the Peabody goes to BloodyKnuckles.com. Bloody elbow. A couple of Chuck Liddell Awards. Yeah. But, um, guys, when we were kids, summer meant freedom. No homework. No teachers. No school. And as adult, summer still means freedom. Thanks to Mintmobile's summer sale. Right now, at Mint's plans are at $15 per month, even unlimited. So, free yourself from big wireless and their gimmicks and gotchas. 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Oh, I think so, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That kind of stuffs- We gotta get into that, man. The paper view has been set up for an MMA fighter challenging and chimpanzee to the fight. Well, he's challenging, man. His name's Wavy. I thought that was the chimps name. He says Wavy V-Chimp, which just sounds like a court case. That's what they're going to use to never allow this again. Yeah, this is what a quote. Do I think I can beat a chimp in a fight? Yeah, I do. But I never thought I was going to do it. Then all of a sudden, all these people are in my DMs, like we'll give you $5,000. So I took a guy's offer to fight this chimpanzee in a country I can't speak about. Oh, wow. Canada. That's Saudi money. He's really- Something, huh? Listen, guys, Riyadh's not working for a season two. Quick pivot. Man vs. Chimp. Forget a bit about it. Listen, I love him just as next to me. He'll be back next year. His new stuff a year is great. It's great. But what I want to see? Chimp vs. Man. I imagine they're doing that kind of stuff in weird countries all the time. Yeah. But if you're like in North Korea, that's probably a Tuesday night for Kim Jong-un, right? Yeah, dude, you go to Bangkok. You could find one of these. Well, where's the things you can shoot the cows? Vietnam. They used to have a joke about that. Yeah, but that was real. That's one of my- I know. Yeah, but they fixed sites. It was in Bahrain. I think they fixed the sites so you don't hit it. They're going to waste a cow. You talk. That's big money over there. Yeah, but it's like a couple hundred US dollars. But I guess these old joke was these like- Get 15 cow for that. Oh, Bargatsies joke was like- 15 cow. They count on you missing. Bargatsies goes, "Imagine if you're good at it. Like you take out the cow. You got to do this a lot at home." That was always a lot of their cow. I said, "If you take out the cow." One ex-user pointed out a chimp doesn't know to not use its teeth. Oh, yeah. What are you going to put a mouthpiece on a chimp? This is going to be bad. That's awesome. I mean, but I can't find out where we can watch it. It just says it's going to be on pay-per-view, but it's not giving us a- Yeah. That might be if that's like a- I don't think that's going to be on like the regular internet. You can't Google that link. You don't think it's dark? No, I don't know if it's dark, but it's not light. It's the gray web. What if he wins? He just knocks out a chimp? Yeah, that's also weird. Like, what are they counting? No one is going to have this. There's no way. They only get scientifically- I listen. I'm against Kowshi. I'm against a polymarket. I'm against all those prediction apps. Bad heavy on the chimp. I'm going to have the little business on this. Just the only time I live where I thought about downloading that app where I go. I just can't do this. I don't see this. Kimbo slice, maybe in his prime. Me. I'm like a chimp day in a backyard. A chimp doesn't know to like, oh, I got fucking rocked in the face. And then he's just going to keep charging. It's just like, well, now I have to kill you. I don't think there's an MMA fighter on the earth that could do it. No. You know who I think could do it? Someone that works at the zoo? Someone that's better at it? Someone that's probably had a couple of fucking run-ins, a couple of dust-ups. It's one that had to get out of the cage quick. I used to work down at the Pittsburgh Zoo. Shit got a little out of here. There's some guy with three fingers going, listen, what you don't want to do is get the fuck out of here. If I see him in his corner, it's guy could have a shot. You know, he's got this safari hat on. You're like, all right, that guy knows what the fuck he's talking about. Me and the chimp are drinking after work. Somebody says something stupid. We start talking politics. I've been here before. Oh, you're useless. And I didn't know that guy was a libertarian. That's the guy. I know. I'm missing my ear. I'm overv- I'm vando in it because this guy, fucking, this guy got touchy about health care. Yeah, I make one bamboo joke all of a sudden. He's stuck in a swatted, man. He said I haven't fight me like a man. Yeah, I threatened to dress as the man in the yellow hat. This guy goes right for my nose. Yeah. A noseless, fingerless dude cornering him, I go, you're gonna be sick. If he brought out the lady from Connecticut that got her face ripped off. Oh, god, yeah. Oh, god. That's his mis-illisabeth. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. Oh, dude. Remember, she was on Oprah. She ripped my friend apart. Yeah. She, uh, she fucking was on Oprah. Yeah. When she got a new face. She was like, that was great. That monkey was like, damn. I'm sorry I was in a bad place. No, my girl. It's all love. Hey, man. Sometimes I'm gonna lose my shit. He's quit drinking since then. I do have her come out with you. Make it a spectacle too. If you're gonna do this, don't have that. This isn't a spectacle enough already. Yeah. It's happening in a country. I can't talk about it. Yeah, which definitely means the nation country. Yeah. There's no way. I mean, there's probably a lot of countries that would play ball with this. Kazakhstan. Yeah, Kazakhstan. One of the stands. Turkmenistan. Yeah. I don't think there's anyone that handles that chip that isn't in a squat most of their day. Imagine if it's a fighting chimp. Well, what is that though? I don't know. They fight them. Do they fight them? Maybe. Somewhere. If it's a fighting chimp. Wait. Do we not? Is the chimp picked out? Do we know? Yeah. Oh, that's a good cause. Or they're just going, whoever's fucking got up on the wrong side of the bed today. Just see that. Yeah, I don't know. I poke a couple of the sticks. This one's even angriest. Because you're right. Also, you can't watch tape on your opponent. I kind of want to see him in this enclosure. You're better off with a chimp in captivity than just going out and grabbing a chimp from the wild and bringing him in fresh. Yeah. He'll be pissed. I don't know. He'll be pissed. Oh, but honestly, just to argue against yours devils advocate, the bright lights and the humans might throw a lot of them out. This guy, at least for a second, dude, you don't think the guy's like the bullet start flying in the chimpanzee and he goes, I know his neck. His eye. I know what makes these pussies, you know, I've already I see what makes them skittish and that's what I'm going for. So I'm looking if there's in where to watch. I'm going to type that in. Where to watch? Uh, semi-side note. My cousin. He's got to be written all over it. Oh, I just disowned. My cousin is, uh, he's a carpenter in Philadelphia, a union carpenter in Philadelphia. And he's doing toughest of the trades boxing matches where it's like the pipe fitters fight the electricians, the electric. And he's like, it's like, I don't think it's sanctioned by any means. He's never boxed. And like, I'm like, dude, I'm in your corner as we're fucking getting you a gold, are you garbage robe? Yeah. But tell me what you did. What? That you got a cup. This guy got a couple of white claws in him and convinced him to do it. Yeah. I was all fucked up. We were done in short. Not a while. And, uh, you're cousin tough. Yeah. And he's a big, tough kid. He's a big, fucking carpenter. But boxed? He's not like, he's not a very experienced fighter. He doesn't have a lot of fights. He's, he, and, yeah, not even like street fights and he's going in with someone who's like also not a boxer. Like, they, they pair you, it's like, you know, they pair you up because he's not sending you under like, you know, some fucking Dominican from North Philly who's been fucking shadow box in his whole life. A buddy of mine that I grew up with that was very tough. I went in one of those tough man competitions. He was like a, he was like, he got in a lot of fights. Like, to the point that he got sent to like a military school, came back filled with muscle instead of fat, big problem, and then kept fighting. One time came over to my house after he knocked an older man out in a 7-11 parking lot. Oh, dude. He was driving his mom's minivan and a guy I was driving over. I told the story before. It was coming home and this guy started to shit with him. He was 16 and he just pulled over and dropped an adult and then came to my house to smoke weed. It was like, I just beat up a man and then I was like, holy shit. But I just started nightrider, so you got to hold it and say, I think that's fun. I mean on that. I mean on that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm all, all the way important. I used to go to, um, but he's my chimpanzee a little bit in there. So I'm like, you can do it. I used to go to FDN-Y versus NYPD. I love that. That's the idea. That's always been so cool to me. But you know what they do? FDN-Y got worked because NYPD brought in the CEOs from Rikers. They counted them as NYPDs. Oh, so they're ranked. Yeah. Those guys just beat the shit. It was just like, it was like this bulldog looking Italian guy from Brooklyn from like ladder 28. Watch my hair. Hey, fat little guy, he's like, hey, I'm a fucking, hey, I'm a fire chief. I got this guy. I got a bag in my basement giant black dude that worked at Rikers for the last seven years breaking up. Yeah. And he just got in the ring and just tee off on these guys to, I was with Wyatt Sennack. We went and watched it. And both of us were like starting to laugh by the fifth fight. We're like, oh, they just fucking, it was a ring. Yeah, I love that. That's so, the idea of that's always been so cool to me. And by the way, the crowd's into it. We'll go. Yeah. Let's go. It's time it happens. Yeah, always at the garden. Let's go. They do it at the Madison Square Garden Theatre. I love that. It's very fun. It's very fun to heckle. It's very fun to yell. Yo, a cab. Oh, cabs. Oh, cops are bastards. But if you're sitting on the FDNY side, they're like, yeah, you know, right? Thanks for being the real hero. Yeah, you guys. Or I'll go on the NYPD and be like, you know, I'm thin fucking blue line. You're dumb and shit. That's a 515. Thank you for your service, Sean. But thank you for your service. I always think of Colin Quinn's joke, where he goes, hey, you know, the black teenagers are talking like cops and the cops are talking like black teenagers that like, yo, yo, yo, home boy. What's going on? He goes, no, no, no, that's a sergeant. He ain't going to get out of the car for a five-way. Yeah, that's a five-and-a-team sergeant. They're going to get out of the car with that one. I always think of that. But this chimp, I really, I'm going to reach out to both of you. I'm in. Give me up. Guys. I have a link. Did I say what it is? I can't find it. But I will spend the rest of this week. I have nothing to do. I'm going to see. I'm traveling to Portland. It's all I'm going to do on the flight. I'm going to have social media off my phone. All I'm doing is just. You're off. Off my phone. You're off your phone, yeah, yeah. Take it off. I downloaded it in the morning to post. Whoa. Can you try that brick? You know, the new guy Luke is on the brick. He swears by it. Let me tell you about the brick. It works for a week. Yeah. You brick the brick. I don't know exactly what it is. It's the brick. It just locks your apps. It's a thing that you have with it. That if you don't have this brick thing by you, you can't look at your social media. It's like you leave it at the house. You lock your apps. And then if you go, you're out all day. You can't lock it. You can use your phone. You just can't unlock and scram. And so to me, that was always like, nah, it's too. I just need to delete it. I need to make it show. I understand. I need to make it show inconvenient to look at. That I only do it when I'm at home and I need to like if I'm posted or like if I'm like. If he'll be like, hey, someone wants to collaborate on a clip. I'll be like, let me download it and look at the clip and then go like cool. I'll collaborate with it. But I like it just is better. And so now I'm just like reading these random ass news stories about Jim. This is where you had this yet. But wait a minute for my mental health. Show her. Way better for my mental health. Because I'm just like, I actually generally kind of want to see this. I think it's animal cruelty. I think it's fucked up. But listen, if it's gonna happen, what am I not going to watch? It's going to be horrible. I don't give a shit who got new faces. It's going to watch this guy get ripped. There's shreds in my gorilla. Who sold out the Charlotte common sense. He's in six shows. He's out the watch. That's the one. Yeah, you go. That's so much tickets instead of me. I'm feeling like that champ when I'm on fucking social media like. Take it off and I go. All right. This will be fucking cool. Yeah. But yeah, I am excited to watch that in less someone dies in which case. Obviously he's gonna, if they don't stop it, he's going to get killed. He's going to lose something for sure. Yeah. Yeah, which like I kind of, I want that to happen. Something that's not going to be able to be stitched up. And something's coming off. It's going to take him. It's going to take multiple incisions to put it back together. He's going to look. He's going to look. Yeah. Take a picture of me. And he's like, I think they showed a picture of me. He's like a good looking kid. It's like, you know, shape. You go, brother, there's no. I just don't see the plus side to any of this because you win 500 grand. 500 grand. That's a, that's a pretty big upside. Yeah, you're right. You know, if you're willing to go, I'm going to fight this chimpanzee. The 500 grand is. Yeah. You're, that's generational change. Side of that. You can't really talk about it. No. Why? Because if they go, if he's buying like a Nissan Ultima and they go, are you paying cash? How did you get this cash? He goes, so. He's going to have the one string. It's going to be fun. I don't know what you're saying. Find out about this and I'm gonna text you guys about where the fuck this is. >> We should all be there. doing more stuff like this. We should be like, we should all go to this. We all have the means to get to the forest. - We're gonna go. - We're gonna go to NYPDFBNY. - Yeah. - We'll start there. - That'll be a fun one. We should do a recap on, are you garbage? - Let's do it. - Let's go right to the studio, right from MSG. - Boom, hit it. - Just go in and fucking break down what we saw. - I love that kind of shit. Anytime there's just like people, I don't know why. Always from the departed to, I don't know if it was rugby when the cops played the fireman. He's like your first time getting pussy and the history of fire or pussy. I don't know, I just like, I love-- - He's got lines, he's a little forced. - Yeah. - Which honestly, can I tell you, I feel like you practiced that in front of the mirror. - But they do say that is like one of the, one of the things of that movie is that he was homosexual. And that's where a lot of his anger came from. - Yes. - And they like, they use that line as a deflection. - Yeah, also. - You get no pussy. It's also when he goes, you get married and he goes, yeah, I'm getting married. He's like, yeah, they like to see a man that's consistent. He's like, make sure your dick works. He's like, it's working overtime. - All the time, yeah. - It's working overtime. - And then he's sitting there eating his fucking weedies and this fucking bitch has got a banana in her hand. Then then he couldn't get hard. - Yeah. - What the fuck is that? - Is that the one she goes, do you want to talk about what happened last night? - Yeah, she's peeing on the banana. - Oh man, that's gross. - Then he loves imagery. - Yeah, then Leo got her and gave it to her. - One shot. - Woo, woo. - One shot. - Put a baby in her. - Out of the rain, out of the rain. - All fucked up, too. - Was he perked? - He was perked. - He was perked, too. - He wasn't pooping. I'll tell you how much. - Oh man. - So funny is it's Cuzzitz Leo and it's that actress. It's like really sexy. But if it was like one of Katie's friends from Massachusetts who's like, "Had we ever had?" I was doing percuss sets and then I fucked my fucking therapist up there. - He's like, "Rains out." He goes, "I went over to my fucking therapist house and fucked that." - I'm pretty sure she's married. - She's married to a steady co-op. - I'm in a lot of trouble. - I fucking went in there. I fucking raw dog there. I fucking, I don't know. I'm on the fuck. - I stole his watch. - I'm in raw was moving. I figured who gives a fuck. - By the way, I fucking took a dump in a house and I fucking didn't even flush it. - Fuck her. - Fuck her. - Fuck you. - Fuck you. - Fuck you. - Writing me off, not letting me take part. - Fucking Medicaid. Get the fuck out of here. - Maybe such a shithead. - That was real. - Yeah, that's so funny. - She looked like one of Mickey Ward's sisters. - Yeah. - She one of those MTV girls. - And she'd be like, "Yeah, I fucked them." So what, what are you gonna do? Fight me when you're a champ? - Why don't you go get him? You know, if all you go find him, you're a cop. - Yeah, a cop. - Oh, he tracked him down. - Can you go find your heart on, smart guy? - Yeah. - You're a fucking queen. - I know you're a queen. You're a fucking soft. You're soft, sir. Every night. He's like, "Oh, fucking hell." - Yeah, they always make a, like-- - I told you not to talk about that. - You fucking dumb bitch. - I'm like, "Homer was barred." (laughing) - That's so true. It's so romantic. It's like the perfect version of it. - Oh, it was hot. It was raining outside. - Yeah, and it's fucking comfortably numb being covered in a flowway of become comfortable. - And I remember she said it before they start kissing. She goes, "I find your vulnerability something right now." And I'm like, "I don't know what that is. I'm gonna get some of it." Tell like, "Bluet you." - Also, the least accurate part of that scene is him not before he does it going, "You never fucked a black guy, right?" (laughing) - Are we not gonna be like these guys are from Boston? He goes, "Yeah, so fucking black guys, right?" - And we won't quit. - 'Cause you're fucking dealing with the court system. So I just wanna make sure that none of the brothers from Dorchester coming out of here, fucking right. - Ring in your bell. - That would've been awesome. - Ring in your bell. - It would've been fucking so fun. - Yeah, I don't wanna insult you unless I'm bad at it. (laughing) - You are. - This might come off a little crude, but, uh. (laughing) - And then he stops and he's not fucking black guys, right? - He goes, "No." But he is, he's such a piece of shit. - Not once ever. - Never ever. - You have a fucking think about it? 'Cause that counts, though. - Even when you were dancing in a show of town, never. - Yeah, yeah, no, yeah, dude. You got a night school, you know, a blue black guy. (laughing) - Yeah, dude, him just on perks, fucking is, his court order therapist is. - Fucking scratching his neck. He's got the itchy. - He goes, "Ah, fuck." He goes, "Those can't hold this real gold." - He got bedbugs or something. - Yeah. - Back up in this house. - Yeah, you're fucking, you're gonna lose some stuff. You're moving. - I'm just gonna say you lost it in the move. - Oh, yeah, it was the night before the move. - Yeah, he goes. So this fight, he's down back in South East. - You know, you could probably squat in here for a couple more weeks, right? - He goes, "I know where they can go. "Fucking do drugs." My old court order therapist. - He just moved out. - With a queer boyfriend. - A factor in this house. - Then you go, "Oh, God." (laughing) - Oh, but what world are you not cool with that? Huh, what? - Come on. - You're willing to break into the house and do drugs with them, but then he's like, "I fucked it right here." And you're like, "What, dude, come on." I'm trying to break in here and get high. - Dude, come on, I wanna tie up and push off. That fucking grossed out. Come on, man. - You just crushed those pills up, will you? - Yeah. - Just shut up. Stop talking about your romantic, I need to do a line of that. - That's funny. - Ah, you guys are the fucking best. - Thank you, bro. - I love you, man. - Watch the special. The link is below. - Thank you. - It's one of the best podcasts of all time. Two of the best men of all time. Also, I have to say phenomenal fucking job on tires. - Thank you, buddy. - You are a great piece of shit. - You was well, my friend. - My friend, Danny Sode. - You was well, Danny Sode. - I just played it, I just played it retarded. - You were working. - You were a real piece of shit. - No, that was easy. - I loved it. (laughing) - I loved the whole talk of talk of tires, thank you. - Thank you. - The thing with the, I damn, dude. - Thank you, thank you. - Thank you, brother. - They did, you know, John McEver Shane and Gerbin and all that. - They did so good. - Oh, dude. - Great. - And season four. - Yeah, season four? - Just announced. - You know, your scummy ass is coming back. - I love you and stov, man. - Thank you. - I love you and stov. - Thank you. - I thought you and fucking O'Connor were fucking fantastic. - Yeah, they made me a nice white supremacist. The call I got was, the call I got was no n-word, no shaving head, you in, and I said. - I'm out. - I'm out. - Who's how we taking it? - I go. - Oh, so you're fucking laying out. - Yeah. - Oh, so you lost. - You really was. - So you lost your good stuff. Are you garbage fucking rules? Check out their special right now. Go click the link. I love you guys. - Love you, bud. - Thanks. (upbeat music)