#3 - Dreams of a YouTuber

Hey everybody, welcome to episode number three of Off the Trail. This is Brett, joined by my wife, Sydney. Hello. So we are recording our third episode after taking, I think, a three week hiatus. Something like that. We skipped one week planned because that was Rage Weekend, so I knew I wasn't going to be home to record a podcast then. Correct. And then the previous two weeks, I think there were technical difficulties with the recording setup. Yeah. I just wasn't ready to actually actually get everything set up to do the podcast, but now we're back. This is something that we are committing to. It's just, it took us a while to get around to it, which I mean with a family of five, it's difficult to actually find the time to do this event. Yeah, life happens. Yeah. So life's been happening. Yep. Have your past three weeks been said to be honest, I don't really remember because there's been so much going on. That's fair. Yeah. I know that you were gone for Rage Weekend, so I was like without you a lot more than normal. And just to clarify for everybody who doesn't know Rage is South Africa's largest gaming and geek culture expo. So I went to see if there was anything there for us. And as far as the UFD tech channel is concerned, there wasn't a whole lot going on there. So yeah. Yeah. Just because tech isn't really primarily on display and everything that is on display, we already have in the office because we get it for review. So. Yeah. You actually ended up taking both of our oldest boys with you on the last day that you went. Right. Yeah. And for them, was it, um, there weren't that many things to do there. So like our oldest son is seven. And so I'm not going to have him going into the call of duty booth that they had there. Thank you. But we played Spyro. They had that there. Then they also have a, they had another game called, I think it was Starlinked, which is like a space game, but it's like, it's definitely more kid friendly. But it's also like a cash grab where you're supposed to buy like additional, like characters that you slot onto the controller and make a different part. Yeah. No, all of that. We just need another shoebox full of those. Exactly. No, we don't have those. Like I've intentionally tried not to get into games that require that. What is that shoebox, the or shoebox? So somebody gave those to us. We didn't buy those. Oh, okay. Yeah. So that's the way I like it. Amibos and all of that kind of nonsense. That's just like trying to get the parents to haul out cash for the video games. It's not something that I really am thrilled with or what I want to do. Yeah. So those were the games that they played. There was a Fortnite tournament that was on the main stage. They watched that. Everything else was just kind of like, okay, it's just a big crowd of people and some people are dressed up and some people are looking funny. Like. Yeah. But I think they probably enjoyed the time with you. Yeah, I think they definitely enjoyed getting to go with me and experiencing it. But it's definitely not a kid event. Sure. Or maybe it is and we just don't like, like our kids aren't into Fortnite right now. Yeah. I think ours are a little bit more sheltered than some. So it might be. I don't think they're sheltered. I wouldn't say our kids are sheltered. I just think that I don't let them engage in like the garbage that's out there. Okay. Because there's just a lot of garbage out there. Sure thing. So it's just like sheltering them. It's because it's like, no, really, that's actually not worth your time. Oh, I consider that sheltering, but in a good sense of the word. Okay. Yeah. They're children. Well, I just, yeah, it's just the connotation that like, you know, we're sheltering them because we want to protect them. Yeah. And it's not protection. It's really just like, this is like, this is dumb. Yeah. No, I get it. Like I can't think of a video game. You're protecting them from that stuff. Yeah. Like there's some video game job there. It's just like, why are you playing this? Like this is garbage. It's a bad video game. Like this isn't even worth you playing at all. Okay. Well, I thank you for that. Yeah. I certainly wouldn't have the discernment when it comes to tech and video games to be able to help them filter that appropriately. Yeah. Well done. No, thank you. So we talked about last time the concept of our personal relationships kind of getting in the way of everything we do in life and how to manage that and how to work through it. You said last time that you wanted to talk about dreams and plans and visions and goals for the future. That was your heart's desire. So I wanted you to like, put that on the floor and then we can work through that. Okay. Well. Okay. So last week, but really three weeks ago. Last episode. Last episode. Anybody who's listening to this, they could like, if they listen one, two and three, they could be done with them in the same day. So like, time really doesn't matter anymore. So. Yeah. For my memory, three weeks is different than one week. Yeah. But yeah. So last episode, we were speaking about like kind of navigating the space where we have relationships, but then we also have work. Yeah. And especially your work, which is media creation on a public platform that other people can see. How do we navigate working well and also living in relationship well and like, do we have discussion boundaries and all of that? And I think that that's really important when it comes to the discussion about like what are your ultimate dreams and like what are you setting about to accomplish? Because the fact is we're finite human beings. So that means we have limited time and resources. And we have to be careful in what we choose to spend our time doing because we can only pursue so much at once. So we're talking about the boundaries of like that choosing and that being intentional. Because if we do it right, I would say that we're able to live the life that God planned for us to live, which is a great abundant free life, living and operating in the gifts that he's given us. And but if we're not intentional, like you don't get to do that. That kind of slips by. Yeah. It just slips by. And maybe you get to do some things, but you're not like really living in the fullness of the things that God created you for. And so now that we got the like kind of tricky relationship stuff talked about and out of the way, like I'm actually excited to have a conversation with you about your dreams and visions and goals and us as a family, all of that. And I actually think that it's kind of exciting because like I haven't talked to you about this kind of stuff in a while. So like I'm going to be learning from you at the same time as everybody who's watching. So like it's actually like it's going to be very genuine because I actually don't know like some of the things that you're thinking of and some of the things that you're planning and what your ambitions are. And so I can't filter it before you say it. I think I've communicated most things to you at least in a general fashion. Very, very general. Sure. Yeah. It's not like I'm going to surprise you with anything. It's not like I'm trying to rise up an army of geeks to overthrow the South African government or something like that. No, I know that. But I really like, there's so much information that comes from knowing the nuance of things. And I feel like I don't really know that very well. So like the nuance of my ideas or like the nuance of like the actual nitty gritty details. Both. Okay. That was a weird way of saying like the technical side of things or like the actual details of how I'm planning on carrying it out. Right. Maybe a little bit of both, but don't bore us. Okay. Oh dang. Slaying it down right up front. Geez. I just mean like we don't need to know like if you need to add a row to your Excel file while you're keeping track of things to make this. I don't do that. I don't have Excel files. Okay. Well, I have probably my biggest downfall is like my lack of ability to track my life. Yeah. Shame. Well, no, I just like I couldn't live if I didn't do it. So. Okay. Yeah. No, I was talking with Tunday earlier in the week. I was like, do you feel like you have enough work to do? And she was like, yes. And I was like, okay, never mind. And she was like, what are you talking about? I was like, I kind of need a personal assistant to like actually gather my life. Yeah. And but she was like, oh, I'd be interested in that. I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. If you feel like you have enough work, stay with what you're doing. Right. Right. Stay with what you're doing. And for those of you who don't know Tunday is the marketing manager here at UFD Tech. She helps to make sure that we have ad spots and we actually can pay and grow everything that we're kind of doing. And she's just a great friend as well. So. Yeah. So, I mean, she's a key part of the vision that I kind of have for everything going forward. I mean, it all really stems from the fact of like we're here in South Africa on purpose. Yeah. Like we, you're not South African. I'm not South African. We had no friends here prior to moving here. Yeah. Like we, we came with a, an idea that we would work at a local church and hopefully impact the communities of local South Africans. Yeah. Like that's, that's the idea and vision behind us being here. And how that has played out is obviously insanely different from what anybody thinks when you hear somebody's a missionary. Yeah. So like, oh, hey, you know, he's South Africa's largest tech YouTube channel. That doesn't even make sense. Like it doesn't compute. Yeah. But it all stems out of the place of we're trying to figure out ways to effectively, sustainably and creatively. find ways to grow the communities here in South Africa. - Yeah. - So that's both in our church work. Obviously there's people there that we're working with and we're figuring out ways that we can grow them, disciple them, help them to become fulfillment of what they're supposed to be. But then there's this odd thing that started with the YouTube side hustle that like I started as a hobby just 'cause I wanted to try my hand at it 'cause I saw all of the fancy dope tech that everybody was getting on YouTube and I was like, dang, that would be cool. And you always hear the advice that people give when there are reasons to be on YouTube is never try to be on YouTube for money because it'll never work out. But then my story is like, that's-- - We just needed some cash. - Yeah, that's all I wanted. I wanted that 65 inch TV that everybody was toting around like three or four years ago. - Yeah. - Anyways. And then like it slowly morphed into, oh wait, there's actual potential here. There's something that could grow into more than just a nerd in a spare bedroom making videos. - Yeah, but let's be more fair than that. It's not just that you wanted cash. You actually felt moved to make content rather than just to consume content. There was a collision there in intersection. - I think the reason I did YouTube, specifically. - Yes. - 'Cause I had no video presence whatsoever at the time. I had no video editing skills whatsoever at the time. Actually my greatest content creator, Shin Skill was probably writing. Like I'm a decent writer. I know how to communicate thoughts effectively through words. And so I had like a blog at one point, but it just never, like, the reason I chose YouTube specifically and then tech videos on top of that was because of the money. - Okay. - And the cool gadgets that everyone is getting. - That's totally fair. But, okay, yes. But still consider like, if most people, whether there was money or not, if you could write in a journal about your thoughts. - Right. - Versus creating a multi-sensory piece of content. And especially when it's related to tech. Like you weren't just like, hmm, I think I'll make a video about computers. Like you actually knew a ton about tech already. You didn't just like randomly say, I wanna be a tech YouTuber. If there was a topic that you could explore, it would be tech. - Okay. - That's what you know a lot about. - Okay. - Yeah. - So I just, I don't think it's fair to come on and say, I just wanted money. - But I did. (laughs) - I mean, okay, part of it was the fact that I felt like I was consuming way too much content at the time. - Sure. - Like, I-- - Were you consuming too many people's journals or blogs? - No, there are videos. Watching too much tech. - Yes. - Right. - And then you ended up making videos as well. - Right. But to be fair, I also wasn't wasting time 'cause I was doing it while I was also working another job. It's just that I had a lot of free time working that job. So. - Sure. No, I understand. - Yeah. Anyways. So I just, I felt like I wasn't fulfilling everything I could do with my life. - Sure. - By watching. Anyways. So that's why I jumped into YouTube in the first place. But then it became more, like it just slowly started gaining momentum. And I think, I don't know if you've said this on the podcast before, but like the moment where you were finally like, oh, this could be something, was when I finally went to Computex and had two companies pay for my trip to go there. - Yeah. I mean, I, okay. I watched, you say that things built slowly, which is true. But they didn't just build slowly, you built it slowly. - Oh, no. - How much? - No, I didn't the best. - No, you were, that's not a slight. I'm saying that there was active tons of work. There was working full days at other things and then spending full nights doing YouTube. And there was sacrifice from everybody that allowed you to do that. So I don't want people to think that you started something and it gained momentum on its own. You were there pushing and pushing and pushing. - No, that's definitely correct. - I worked my butt off to make it happen, but only after I saw that there was some sort of potential there to actually make it work. - That's totally fun. - So there was that. But I think once I had the realization that it could be more than what it was at the current moment, which was just, you know, I was making videos for fun and having a couple hundred people watch it here and there. And that's when I was like, okay, let me try to take this seriously. Cast a vision, an ultimate vision for what I want to do with the content creation and then always try to make decisions that follow that goal that I'm ultimately trying to achieve. Which is the same goal that we actually have here being in South Africa, which is to impact the lives of the people here. That's the general idea. But how am I going to do that? For me, the way I see it is by building a media group of people who actually can do content creation and empowering them in a way that they both learn how to do it properly. They have the equipment to do it, provided for them. And then we can work on the strategies and ideas that allow them to be successful at it. - Okay. - And everything I did, but then having somebody to produce a almost. And not just one person, the idea is to build a hub to do it. That was the goal going forward. And right now what it looks like is I have people serving the purpose of my team. Right now we're building UFD tech and we're building our Twitch channel right now. So we're working on growing my vision. Which is the tech side of things. But ultimately I wanted to get it to a place where there's a chef who's tired of working at a freaking restaurant down the street and wants to actually bring that experience to people on the internet. I want to find ways to facilitate and resource growing them in their vision on what they're trying to do. But then having the back end, the support and the backbone to actually do that in a way that's meaningful. - Yeah. - Because living in South Africa, like internet sucks here. The access to equipment stupidly expensive. Like much more so than in the States. And like there's also just the lack of, I want to say knowledge but exposure. The lack of exposure that like you could do this. Like I can't tell you how many times you read in the like local content creator, Twitter, or the spirit, where people are just saying that it's impossible for them to make it. - Yeah. - And it's just not. Like it's just that we're all doing it really poorly. And we haven't figured it out yet. - Yeah. And I mean also I think you will be the first to admit that like, it also has something to doubt. - Sorry. - It also has something to do with privilege perhaps. - Yeah. The fact that access to the resources that you need in order to create content for YouTube, which as you said includes internet and that is not a given everywhere here. And you need access to equipment which is, you can't get everything. You can get a lot of things but it is very expensive. - Right. - And coming as us coming from America, means that we have a certain exchange rate that we're working on. We have certain exposure and knowledge to things from the states as well. - Right. - We have. - In American accent. - We have a mother, my mother, who if we're like, we really need something, she can bring it with her. - That's true. - If we can't afford it here, we can at least get it from the states and have her bring it with. Not everybody has that stuff. - Right. No, we definitely, we do have privilege and I can't deny that. But I think the goal is to always make sure that we're aware of it, but then find ways to utilize it properly. - It's called leverage. - Yes, yeah, leveraging the position that we're in in order to provide an experience to other people. - Yes. - Like right now we have five people on my team. - Yeah. - And they're all from slightly different backgrounds. Two of them are homeschooled children who grew up to. - They're not children. - They're previously homeschooled. So that. (laughs) The previously homeschooled, which was a revelation to me after I hired them. - Yeah. - Then we have Tank who is just Tank. I don't even know how to. His name is Tank. That's the interesting part about him. Then we have Tindy, who's known the marketing team. And we have Ashley, who helps run our UFD deals website. And. - Like my goal with all of them is to find what are you trying to achieve in your life and how do I help you do that? And I'm not. - Yeah. - I don't think I'm doing that well or even effectively right now. - Thank you. - But that. - I am. - Yeah. - Which part of it is like we need more people. Because I'm the bottleneck right now in all of our experience. But that's also even why we have so much. So many people in the first place is just the fact that I recognized if this is going to grow at all. It has to be from the fact that I. I expand beyond myself. I move it towards something that isn't just me right now. Yeah. And that's where as soon as there was any sort of money coming in from the channel, I was like, I need help right now. And so with all of the money that was coming in, I put it into tank. And then from that, we were able to expand and we picked up a reason. From that, we were able to expand and pick up rickus. From that, we were able to expand and pick up a 10-die. And now, hopefully, we're on the new stage where we have sponsorships coming in that will allow us to grow both financially, but then also with our content. Because part of it, the struggle was that we were having to divide the line between we're making videos for the sake that we have to pay bills. Yeah. And then also, we're trying to make it about things that we enjoy. And so trying to find that balance of what do people want to see, what do we have to make right now in order to keep this business going. Was a struggle. And hopefully that won't be the struggle going forward. And it actually has been less so this month. We've, I think we put out three videos this past week. And normally we would have done one every single day. Yeah. And there's less pressure on me to actually get that done. But then the videos that we are putting out are doing really well. Because they're effective videos. So they're the things that we want to create. Yeah. But again, that's a position of privilege that we've now finally worked our way into. Yeah. Where I can make things that I want to make. Yeah. Because I don't have to worry about the concern of, am I going to be able to feed my family this month? Yeah. Which I think a lot of people in South Africa don't even have that with the jobs that they're currently working. Let alone if they actually wanted to somehow try to do content creation on top of that. Yeah. People hustle here. Yeah. Like it's really impressive. Like we have friends who will get up at three o'clock in the morning to catch a train. That should take maybe half an hour to 45 minutes to reach its destination. But because it's the train service is so poorly managed, it'll take them two or three hours to get there. And then when they get there, there's a walk to the next station to get on the next train to get to another station where they finally walk off and get to their jobs. Yeah. And they do that six or seven days a week. Then they do physical labor of some sort. And then they get back on and go home and maybe you only see their kids at six o'clock at night, seven o'clock at night. If that. Yeah. Kids are picking siblings up from daycare, cooking for them at home, coming home to a roof that leaks and everybody living in the same room. Like it's really amazing what people are able to do. Yeah. But then also finding ways to like part of that is like that's a systemic issue. Yeah. Like how do you break somebody out of that? It's not by just giving them money. Yeah. And it's not just by like like that's probably been the biggest struggle with trying to figure out how to carry this vision forward, especially with where we are. We are is the there's so many problems that are facing us like to actually get this to work. Because if I give them exposure to what being a YouTuber is, what are they going to do with that? Nothing because they don't even know if they have electricity at night. Yeah. So like how do we find a way to reach the people that we're trying to work with? Yeah. And because like the idea is giving them a hand up instead of a hand out. But like even that doesn't work when a system is built to not allow you to even get a hand up. Right. Yeah. And it's it I wouldn't say that it's like been intentionally made that way. But that's just the way it is. Like either you have a job that is paying enough that you don't have to deal with all of the problems that most poor people deal with. Or you have to deal with all of those problems. And they're the ceiling that keeps you from actually ever rising above that. Yeah. That can be true. And well, and also like just to take into consideration that your vision is not like what you want to do is not for everyone in South Africa. Like not everyone in South Africa is going to have a YouTube channel. Like that's a very specific group of people. Yeah. And I'm guessing that probably most of them are young. And like they're are age or younger. Sure. Probably not older than this. Yes. Which is really cool because youth unemployment here is like. It's double what the actual unemployment is. Yeah. That's insane. Like I've seen anywhere from 20 to like 45 percent as the numbers. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, 50. Okay. So obviously it depends on the source that you read. Yeah. But most of what I've seen is say that like the actual unemployment rate here is about 25% for adults. Yeah. And then the youth unemployment rates double that. Yeah. And youth is actually means adults here. Like typically it'll mean from about 18 to 35. Yeah. So like and that's kind of prime working age. Yeah. So anyways, all of I know the statistics vary based on the source and everything. But my point is like this is not a solution for everybody in South Africa. This is a solution for that select set of people that are probably young and that are local. Sure. And that have an interest in this kind of thing but maybe no way to get started. I think that would be the start of it. I don't think that's the like I think your stereotyping really hard there. Okay. And the amount of people that are in their 50s or 60s or 70s and the amount of success that they would have with even a podcast would be tremendously high because they have wisdom and value to like to disseminate. Definitely. Yeah. And so it's like the tech side of things. Yeah, absolutely. It's more the younger crowd. But even even that is not like I think I when I picture what this is going to be I don't limit it to those types of people in my mind. And by those types you just mean young people. Right. Yeah. The young, hip crowd or whatever. I'm not saying they have to be hip. I'm saying that they're probably young. No people in their 50s to 80s like totally fine. Like the vision is just the idea that we can like exposure obviously. Like this is not for everybody. Content creation is not for everybody because it is it is a grind. It is a hustle. It is something that takes a lot of investment to get it to be anywhere initially. But then once you do get it somewhere the amount of freedom that you can possibly have with that is fantastic. And that's that's kind of where I want to bring things for for people is just there's freedom in this. And I see it and we're not personally there. We're very close. Like we're on that borderline of like as soon as we can get everything working. Like honestly I think if we just got like one or two more people on the team we would actually be able to put out all of the content that I want to put out. And that would bring us to a place where we can then start investing for the future and the vision of this creator space that I want to do. Like the thing that upset me not upset but just was like dang it was casing nice that announces like 368 plan which is like he's turning his studio into like a content creator hub place and I was like I have that idea. I just don't have the money or the execution to do it right now. So like obviously he's he's infinitely more successful than I am. But yeah like I guess I just don't want to be labeled as a copycat because like I've had this in me. Maybe he had it in him as well anyways that's not the point. Did he steal your idea? No I don't think he stole my idea. I just like I don't want to when I state my idea to people I don't want it to be equated that I took it from somebody. Yeah. Something that I has been like festering into me for quite some time. Yeah. Well before like it's just that casing nice that has the finances and resources he has the leverage to actually be able to implement it right now. Yes. And like one of the realities too is he has the accessibility. He has a building in New York City surrounded by. Well that's probably costing him tens of thousands of dollars. Sure. But I'm just like I'm just saying like it's an accessible area in New York City. Yeah. So you're probably by tens of thousands of people who are interested in such a thing. Yeah and who would be qualified to do it as well. Yes and what it's going to look like for you here is massively different. Sure. Yeah. Massive even the idea of people coming here to do something. The kind of work that it takes to figure out the taxi routes and how to get into gates and all of that like it's a completely different ballgame. Yeah. Yeah. So I mean that's the general ultimate vision but the practical steps are what currently need to be fleshed out. But it's not limited to just bringing people to be YouTubers. It's also trying to empower people who are good at streaming who have a personality that is really good and engaging and fun or people who are good at writing or people who are good at. What if there's a nonprofit that needs their something recorded or whatever I don't know. Yeah. That's less the vision. That's more like that's more providing a service for a company than really being an empowering like. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I view those two things differently, like having, doing work for a company, for, pro bono work is different to me than trying to figure out a way to like like with Rickis like he's our editor but at the same time he's pursuing his acting career like I it's like in some way it it makes me happy that I can enable him to have this stability in his life yeah to pursue that to pursue that on top like he editing he's really good at it it seems like he enjoys working here but like acting is his passion yeah and then I get to facilitate that by providing him with the income and the like the even the job environment where I can say oh you have to take off for two weeks that sucks but you're go ahead that's my hard use because you actually have passion yeah I understand yeah you have passion you have drive you actually want to do something else as well like that that those are the people that I'm looking for right now it's just like people that are more than just what their skills are sure for for a job because like what what we're trying what I'm trying to build requires the right people not the right skills yeah I understand because skills to be a lot that's a lot of things yeah but yeah especially here yeah I don't think it's especially here I think that's just the way I've decided to go about it like the the amount of people that we've had apply to edit our videos is like okay I can see you can edit but like I also see that you are belligerent on social media yeah it's like you're not representing us properly and it also doesn't seem like if I gave you the access to all of this that you would really understand what you're what you're stepping into yeah and so it's tricky it's tricky finding the right people to like it kind of sounds elitist but like I like evaluating people to be worthy quote unquote of like actually being able to do this you know I but I'm also protective because right now we're in this phase of building my vision yeah not we're not in the like phase of like helping other people achieve their goals yeah like it's a mixture of both right now but it's it's a weird place yeah no I understand that I think it doesn't I'm maybe on the surface to some people that will sound elitist but I think to anybody who's ever had to build a team yeah like they're gonna completely understand what you're saying sure yeah but that I mean there there's plenty of jobs out there where if you just you meet the minimum requirements you get it right you're gonna be part of the team you not the one responsible for building that team necessarily and you might find jobs like that but no I like I think every other job I've worked it's like my personality doesn't matter like I just have the skills so therefore I'm hired can you press the button right can I press the buttons am I effective at accomplishing the task are you going to yell at the customers even then even then the amount of like especially in the restaurant industry the amount of turnover that exists because people are like getting into fist fights in the back is just like okay well I certainly don't want to be here for the rest of my life yeah at least at that particular restaurant yeah anyways oh my what I didn't even know about that was the early days they figured it out after a little bit I didn't really let you know about that but yeah like one one one lady got fired and she came in and punched the manager in the face afterwards oh my yeah oh my yeah what about that one who who pinched your booty oh that yeah no I just gave her a stern talking to and she never did it again did you scare her I think so I think she like because because working in a restaurant it's more like a camaraderie's environment yeah and like that I don't know for some reason that's acceptable and for me I just have like my personal boundary limits which is like you don't even like to hug people like somebody touching your booty no she didn't pinch it she like she copped it gave it a nice yeah no she she firmly embraced my tookus and I just I just turned around and I was like no don't ever do that to me again and she was just like oh oh oh dang yeah sorry I'm laughing because like I can just imagine how you would have reacted but that really is a problem in the workplace we cannot be sexually harassing people in any way shape or form well from my side it definitely wasn't a sexual aggression like yes yes and I don't view my butt as a sexual organ either so if somebody were to touch it I don't I don't view that as coming to be fair I've also had no other person grab my butt in a sexual manner so like I'm sure it could happen but I don't like that that's what I used to sit down on the toilet if you really want to grab that by by all means do that but it's not no where where's this podcast I know I just I wanted to make the comment and also I know that you know that you have that privilege of not feeling intimidated as a you personally don't feel intimidated as a six foot two man when a woman does that to you but other way around it would be a completely different story I mean even if you know seven-foot guy where to grab my butt and they're like hmm I would have been like no excuse me anyways no it's mine my butt not yours we are we are respectors of workplace ethics is all I'm trying to say yes and and out of workplace ethics as well right and the whole point behind that was discussing like the the idea of building a team at that job had nothing to do with how we would interoperate interoperate with one another okay it's just had to do with can you ring up customers and smile at them okay good oh can you cut open sandwiches and slather on mustard grates you're hired to work on the line yeah like it didn't matter hardly I mean because even the managers like we're anyways I don't want to I want to relive those memories but but the idea is just like for what we're doing here at U of D tech it is not about the skills that people can bring to the table it's about who you are sure and if you're not the right person I know you're not gonna fit in here yeah that's just like because like even with the team that we have we've had struggles like it's just yeah but but it's also like because we're trying to achieve this vision if we have somebody that like I have to sit down and be like you're not working with the team and like you have to keep having that conversation it leads to the fact that you're not actually able to ultimately get towards your vision because you're having to spend your time on all this frivolous nonsense that it's just a waste of energy to be honest yeah well I think you guys are a pretty low drama workplace I try to be yeah yeah which is good yeah and like high drama person would struggle here they would struggle with you yeah well no I would struggle with them both yeah yeah the biggest drama that we like to talk about is stuff happening in the text here yeah so like that's that's our drama and the drama that comes from comments yeah yeah yeah okay yeah no we're anyways yeah okay so we've heard a lot about your workplace goals sure and dream yeah as far as bridge continue well I'm like it made my heartbeat passed I'm like wait a second it's there's a massive thunderstorm here yeah so we just heard noises outside it makes me a little bit anxious especially because of the crime right so no it's fine we hear noises all the time it's okay okay yeah all right I'm gonna have a hard time focusing now okay keep up okay so we talked about that yeah but what about family or other goals outside of YouTube and creation content creation content content creation yeah I mean that that's the part where I think I'm kind of struggling is just like figuring out where where we ultimately taking our family because like right now we're committed to being in South Africa for the foreseeable future but we can't foresee the future that much so like what what does the next 10 years hold I've no idea because 10 years ago we were we weren't even married so like what what's going to change in 10 years I'm not fully aware so yeah like on that aspect it's really difficult like I know that I want to be married and I don't think I want more kids okay there's that like it's for if we're talking about casting vision like I think three is sufficient I'm not necessarily opposed to adopting later on yeah but as far as like you going through the whole childbirth process and labor and growing them it's getting large for nine months yeah I mean yeah you weighing 125 pounds when pregnant oh no it's hard when you're a little person I'm sure yeah yeah like that that stuff I'm still trying to figure out and especially like obviously I'm a dad for the first time like I haven't raised children before so like I don't know what I'm doing and it's all trial and error and figuring out okay what do I want our kids to become what do I want them to do and how how do I effectively enable them to become what they want to become and then also remembering when I was seven when I was five when I was one can you remember when you were one no but when I was seven like I was engaged in things that you know some of them ultimately went on to shape my life but a lot of them were just kind of like like I they were just stupid ideas that I had because I was a kid yeah And the idea of like, okay, how do I drive my son to really engage with the things that he loves? But then also, how do I steer him away from the things that I can see? It's going to be a clear waste of time, but he wants to do it. Yeah. And finding the balance with that, because like, if I look back at my life, I waste my life on so many different things. But then part of it is they ultimately helped lead me, like, they gave me new experiences. They opened my worldview, and then I was able to incorporate them in other ways, because I did get to experience them. So like, should I take that away from him just because I view it as a waste of time? Like just, it was like that question that one of our friends asked on Facebook. Like, should I let my son spend his like, spare allowance money on skins? Yeah, V-bucks in Fortnite. And it's just like, well, like, it's that, or he's like gonna buy Pokemon cards, or he's gonna buy like, stupid little toy. Like, he's going to buy something that will ultimately not matter to him in the long run. Like that's what kids do. They just buy stupid stuff. And so he's going to do that. So would I have a problem with them spending money on V-bucks? Well, it's kind of as frivolous and as, you know, wasteful as anything else that they could do. Obviously, there's the people out there who are just like, oh, you could save it and you keep it. And then you can, you know, when you're 45, you can sell it for thousands of dollars. But the actual number of people who accomplish that is very, very small. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and also, like, I think it's sometimes good for them to spend money on stuff, see that it breaks because they spent it on something cheap and be like, oh, maybe I shouldn't do that anyways. Yeah. Yeah, the difficulty of trying to teach a lesson versus trying to protect them from the things that go wrong. Yeah. Like, that's probably something that I think I struggle with as personally as a father. It's just like, I always, my natural instinct is always stop. Don't do that. Like, that's dumb. You're going to break yourself or you're going to break that thing or something's going to go wrong. And I'm telling you to stop because I want to protect you from it. Yeah. But in all reality, a lot of the time I think I could just probably let it happen and then just be like, see? Yeah. Like, I'm here for you, but that was dumb. You did a dumb thing. Like, I think it was today, our middle child, he walked into a tree because he was looking at something else. And I was like, okay, like, I could have told you to pay attention there. But now I get to tell you, see this is what happens when you don't pay attention to where you're going. They're walking the trees. Yeah. Well, that particular child actually has quite a problem with walking into things when he's not looking. So I'm not even sure telling him to pay attention with like, you know? Yeah. Yeah, trying to figure that out. It's all a mission. Yeah. It is. Yeah. So, I mean, I want to raise healthy, productive children. Yeah. That's kind of the idea. What that is going to be for each individual one is kind of something that I'm not sure of yet because I don't know what they want. Yeah. Like, there are things that I think I will do differently as a parent than how I got treated as a child, which is what-- Everybody can say that though. Yeah. But like, I think primarily it's going to be trying to push them with things that they feel like they want to quit when they are just momentarily not enjoying something. Yeah. Because that's what happened to me. When I gave any sort of push back to my parents, they let me stop. Yeah. But I view that as super detrimental to me at this point. Like, I look back on all the things that I started as a kid and I'm like, if I would have done that, I would have been a world-class gymnast and pianist right now. Like, why the crap did I not follow through on any of it? Did you do gymnastics and piano? Yeah. And guitar. And I just-- Yeah. Yeah. But it was for like a month and then the day I wasn't feeling it, I just didn't do it. Yeah. Because I was dissatisfied with what was happening. It was just like I had no drive to do it that day. Yeah. And then I communicated that to my parents, they didn't offer push back and then it like, like, they would discuss it with me, but it wasn't like a, well, no, you're going anyways because we paid for it. Yeah. Which is, I think I could have benefited from that. Yeah. But I also like, I don't want like, I think my parents did a good job in not trying to push me to become something either. Yeah. And then it pushed me to follow through on things either. So like, so that weird dichotomy of like, I didn't get that like overburdening parenting. But I also didn't get like the, like, I didn't get the other side as well. So like, I want to find a good middle ground there of like, I'm not going to tell you what to do with your dreams. But if I see you're just quitting because you're having a bad day, I'm just going to tell you now, suck it up. Let's move on. And I'm going to work with you on it. We paid for this. Yeah. We paid for this. So you're doing it. Okay. Yeah. No, we do push our kids in that sense like to not give up. I think that we do that a lot actually. But it's also like here. It's a little bit tricky. Like our life has been so nomadic. Okay. In the last year. And like our schedules change as our work increases or decreases or takes different seasons. And then all of that also means planning around like the things that the kids are doing. So like it's, I think that it might be a bit of a challenge on them that like we're very flexible. And then their schedules get really flexible sometimes. And there's not like hardcore consistency. Sure. Yeah. Anyways, that's the, that's the challenge of being an expat here. Yeah. And having things changed like that. Right. Okay. That's all. Yeah. Okay. I mean, well, that's, that's the dream I have for a family. Okay. Healthy children who are productive members of society. That's great. Is one of your dreams that they're also going to pursue the same religious experience that we have? I mean, that would, that would be the ultimate idea. Yes. But also like. So like I want them to follow Jesus because I view following Jesus as the best life that a person can have. Okay. So that like it would make sense that I would want them to have that. So we're not like, we're not going to be shy on a religious devotion with them. But at the same time, like trying to force a child to follow it for the sake of following it is also super detrimental to them as well. Yeah. Because the idea behind at least Christianity is that it's a personal connection. It's a personal relationship. So how do you have a personal relationship if you're just feeding off of what your parents say? Yeah. And just trying to find ways to help our children discover it for themselves. And obviously, trying to lead them towards that, but more so just it being leading towards them. Not like. Well, we, we know we can't force them right to be Christians or to follow Jesus. I mean, you can't. You can't. No, I think you can force them to do the acts of being. Right. And force them into actually truly having a relationship. Yes. So that's the difference of semantics. Like the amount of, amount of children or adults who have grown up because they were in Christian homes who are Christian, quote unquote, but have no evidence of actually caring about it. It's very high. Oh, yeah. And so like, they could adopt our faith by, by name and even practice. Right. Right. Like, just like for me, like my encounter with Jesus was by myself, personal, like I didn't grow up knowing Jesus at all. I grew up in an atheist family. So like, that's, I got to discover Jesus on my own terms. Yeah. And I feel like there's benefit from having a guide in that, which is obviously what I would want to do as a father. Yeah. And at the same time, I do see like, if I had been pushed at any point in my childhood to do it, I would have rejected it. Yeah. So just, it's again, finding the balance of how do you lead without being overbearing. Yeah. Yeah. And I think to like, kids are really, they're actually quite like discerning when it comes to knowing if you're walking the walk and talking the talk. Right. And I think that versus if you're really just like full of it. Right. Well, and I also like, I don't have the background of growing up in a Christian home where I got serve the platitudes on how to like, how to properly be a Christian. Yeah. Like praying before every single meal was not a thing. Yeah. Therefore, it's not really a thing in our house. Yeah. Like, it's not in the Bible. They have to pray before every meal. Like the Bible says that you should be thankful for your food because God provides you with everything. Like, do you have to like, sit down, hold hands and bow your heads and pray while the kids are foaming out the mouth to actually eat their food? They don't foam out the mouth. They wait till your eyes are clasped and then they start picking off their plate. Right. And like, for me, it's like, that's a ritual, a listic thing that like, I just don't care about personally. Yeah. And obviously we've gotten judged by it from other Christians. But like, it's just something that I don't see matters. And so like, I'm not going to do it. Like, am I thankful that I feel like God has provided us the finances and the food and like living in a society where every refrigerator is to actually keep our food absolutely. But at the same time, like, I feel like I express that in my time of prayer not at the beginning. Like it's a good time for it. Yeah, we just have a different rhythm than that. Yeah, exactly. Which is fine. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, I just asked about that because you didn't really mention anything about spirituality and your goals for your children. Sure. But I think maybe that's because like the goal isn't necessarily that they're going to become something that we have pretty framed for them. Sure. But rather that it is a huge hope. Yes. But there's so many avenues by which to get there and without forcing anything on anybody as you, it's just not something you can force on anybody. Right. Yeah. And it's like if you ask me which, what do you think I should have our kids believe in? Like it would obviously be Jesus. But it's not like, it's not this. Yeah, it's just like everything about them. I want them to find it for themselves because once they own it for themselves, it becomes real to them. Yeah. Like I don't want my children to have my faith. Yeah. I want them to have their own. Yeah. So how do I like do I spend time like trying to talk to my kids about God and read the Bible to them and pray with them? Yes. At the same time, I also give credence to their doubts. I give leeway for their questioning. I give precedent for their idiocy sometimes. Yeah. You're doing something really stupid and sinful. But we all do that. So I'm not going to berate you for not being a perfect Christian right now because you're just a child and you don't even know what it means to fully devote yourself to this. Yeah. I think it is such a good thing for them to be able to like guidance is one thing which is great, but for them to be able to really own their faith as their own is super important. I feel like especially for Christianity because it's not this like convenient religion where you're just like, oh Jesus was a really nice person and he said all these wonderful things. Like there's some really actually incredibly tough stuff in the Bible and if you follow the words of Jesus like you actually have to make decisions that are not convenient sometimes and that don't make a lot of logical sense sometimes. And like when push comes to shove, if that's not your own, then you'll rather be like why am I torturing myself with this if I don't actually believe it? Because if you don't actually believe it, it could feel like torture and lack of freedom and all of this kind of stuff. So anyways, yeah, I agree with everything that you're saying. So and like I can understand why it's not in your goals section of things for our kids. Like in some way it is, but not in the same way that you might think of other goals. I guess. Yeah. Like it's a hope and a desire I have for them, but it's not something that I feel I can make them do. So therefore like what I can make them do is not a whole lot actually. So we have somebody saying that they're concerned caller. How do I phone into the show? We didn't get that set up for this. They're a concerned caller? That's what the Twitch name for them is. And for those of you who don't know who are listening to the podcast, we do go live with the episode of Off the Trail on Twitch Twitch.tv/uFDisciple every Saturday night at this point is the idea. But you don't phone into the show at this point. You can just type your question in the Twitch chat and that would be totally fine and we can read it. I mean, as you mentioned, there's things about following Jesus that don't necessarily align with the cultural identities that people have. The reason Jesus was put on a cross was because he pissed off both the religious leaders at the time as well as the political leaders. He didn't swear field tea to Fidelid, field tea? That field tea seems right. I don't know what you're trying to say. Jesus didn't pledge allegiance to Caesar. Because who is Caesar? Caesar's not somebody you're going to die. You don't give yourself, your ultimate identity is not wrapped up in your nation. It can't be because they're not the ones who give you value. So yeah, Caesar, sorry. And then that put him on the cross and it was the same with the religious leaders. He felt like they were abusing the laws for the sake of. Personal gain. Personal gain. And that's something that many people in the church do. And it's something that's also part of the reason why I really wanted to grow the YouTube channel is so that we're not doing the typical missionary thing of taking people's money. That's something that's in me that I. That's how we started, but that's not how I want to finish. If people are giving us money to be missionaries, I want it to only go into the mission. Yeah. I don't want it to have anything to do with us. Yeah. And what I'm saying behind YouTube is to provide for us as well as other people and then the mission's money that's coming in is literally just for the sake of helping people. Yeah. And not us. Yeah. And not mixing that whatsoever. Not. But to be clear, we know plenty of people have plenty of friends who are missionaries because they are supported 100% by people who willingly donate of their personal finances for their work too. There's not they're wrong with it. No. It's just a personal conviction that I have where it's just like. I feel like if I can provide for ourselves for us, why what and I? Yeah. Like, I'm going to do that, but that's also part of the. It has caused me to step back from doing more work as in the ministry because I've devoted myself to the YouTube channel. Yeah. And it's enabled me to empower you more to do things. Yeah. Well, because of extra income, I actually am free to work more. Like, the youngest, the baby has started going to daycare occasionally. That's my work. That's that's some of my work time. If we didn't have that extra income, that is not something we budgeted for. Right. Like, it wouldn't have been possible. But also just like, we do supply for other people through YouTube as well, which is actually quite a huge privilege to be able to do that. That's the idea. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, I mean, that's the vision and unnotchelle, just like really empowering people, especially empowering people here in South Africa where the privilege, the leverage, and the potential probably aren't realized as much as they possibly could be. Yeah. No, they're definitely not. Yeah. Yeah. So, I think that your dream, I like it. I'm for it. I don't know how I'm going to be a part of it. But I'm happy that you are. I mean, I need you to be giving to you. Because, like, as we were talking about last podcast, it was just the idea that we have to work out our schedules all of the time. Yeah. And, like, the fact that I don't, like, it's not that I don't have to worry about you, but I know that I have that side of my life sorted. Like, I have a wife that I'm going home to. So, like, when I'm at events, it's just like, hey, I've got other things to do, so I can't just sit around and, you know, shoot the crap with you the entire day. Like it provides leverage in that way, but then also your just, your stability in my life, which is nice, especially in the chaotic world that is, you know, YouTube where the algorithm could kill us or make us great, and we, like, we just have to serve this benevolent overlord that is YouTube all the freaking time. Yeah. I hear you. And then, like, you know nothing about, like, the technical aspects of everything I'm doing. So, I don't really want to. But you believe in me. Yes. And, like, you support me so that that's really what I need, I think. Cool. And you do a good job at that. Thank you. I try. Yeah. So, we're, we have about a minute and a half left. So what, you got any closing thoughts that you want to wrap us up with? Well, I want to just tell you my dreams, but I don't think I can do it in 50 seconds. Okay. Well, maybe we can save that for next week. Yeah, I think that'd be great. And by maybe I think we will. Okay. Cool. I'm totally fine with that. Oh, but I really do. I want us to be able to take calls. I understand. I understand. I have to get a phone number for that and have to figure all of that out. Okay. Because I'm not going to give them out our personal number. No, that's. So I have to like develop like a Skype, a VoIP call, some system like that. And so I just have to look into it and I haven't gone around to that. Okay. Cool. So next week, maybe I've firm, maybe less, less than 50%. Okay. Um, it's, it's really just like, yeah, I'm doing my best. I know. And I, I, I have so much on my plate that is like, it's not just the VoIP call thing, but there's like I, I finally this week started to, um, write down like to do lists. And it's been less than effective. I will say that because I don't look at them. That's the issue. It's not that I can't write things down. It's that I will not remember to actually look at my lists. And so I, I'm still developing that like side of my like effectiveness as a leader and a boss and a like content creator, because I'm all over the place. Yeah. I'm a very Lucy person, Lucy, Lucy person. So you're not as structured. Not at all. Not even close. Like I'm very unstructured, but I'm task oriented, which is odd. Like I love getting things done, but heck if I know when I'm going to get around to it. Yeah. Which, which is a struggle for you. So. Yeah, it is, but that's okay. We offset each other in that way. - Okay, well we just crossed the hour mark. Thank you all so much for tuning in to Off the Trail episode number three. We will be back presumably in another week for the next episode. So we'll be here if we can. - Yes. - Our lies are, yeah, they're just not normal. So it takes a little bit to actually get these things done. - Yep. - So thank you guys so much for listening and we'll catch you next time. Don't forget that you can tune in at twitch.tv/ufdisciple on Saturdays where we record this live as well as the fact that this podcast is now available on all major podcasting platforms. So we're on Spotify, we're on iTunes, we're on Google Podcasts, we're on PocketCast, we're on Stitcher, we're everywhere. Primarily we record this and upload this to Enker so you can find us there too, but wherever you want to find podcasts, you can hit us up there. Thank you guys so much for tuning in and we'll see you guys next time. Cheers. - Bye.