#2559 - Sam Morril

the Joe Rogan experience what's up dude good to see you brother what's happening it's been a while it's good to see you it's been a couple years like we were saying yeah man it might was the club even open yeah oh yeah definitely definitely yeah yeah so it's been like a year and a half something like that something like that huh yeah it's good to be here you rolling in on the road just constantly out there I was in Europe for two and a half weeks doing gigs and then uh and then they were like oh we want to drop your special second half of September I was like fuck all right so I just had to stay on the road uh so yeah what is it like in Europe being American they look at you with a side eye it was weirder last year because I was single last year I was with my friend who was single and he thought he was like cool going up to girls in Berlin he's like I'm from America and they're like fuck you I was like yeah I went open with it I was like let's say you're from Winnipeg or something but uh North America North America yeah don't be specific I'm like if you want to get laid say North America but uh yeah you know it's interesting everyone responds differently but I will say I was in Copenhagen at the end and they're selling like a lot of stuff and I was like you're seeing the merch on the street and it's like a little Trump uh holding like a a rattle he's a baby and it says I want Greenland they're selling that in the street so uh yeah yeah they don't like us yeah Ron White was in Switzerland he said they there was like an open hostility yeah it's tough it's a bummer but but the crowds are good the crowds are great yeah I mean it was like I was in like uh I went everywhere from like Lisbon to uh just all Athens fucking Croatia I was in Zagreb. It's amazing yeah how good is their English over there great they love comedy it's like the Balkans they like uh people who are just in wars love to laugh if you were in a civil war recently they don't fucking laugh uh and then yeah they were great and uh yeah I've been I've been to Sweden I've done that before but they were great I did Sweden once it Sweden is it's interesting like Europe is interesting they laugh really hard then they stop and they laugh really hard then they stop you don't get like you know I'm saying Milan is like I'll do three pedo jokes and then they all applaud I'm like what is this Carson in the 80s like what the hell am I on but uh yeah Milan is like that and they laugh hard to get energy like you have to adjust your expectations yeah it doesn't sustain it's culturally it's different like I went over there with Hinchcliffe and he was like I can't get him I go you're getting laughs and he goes yeah but then it stops it's a different thing you're in a different culture they probably have to process the language first of all it's weird yeah and then uh yeah Stockholm the women are like the hottest women in the world. I've ever seen in my life it's yeah all those Nordic women it's like the Vikings did well they did yeah we don't talk about the good of pillaging but uh there were some positives to uh giant handsome men and beautiful women it works it just works it's terrible initially yeah but then a couple hundred years later you're like not bad not bad and peaceful somehow or another like one of the most peaceful places which is weird yeah it is right if you're neutral it's easy to be peaceful when was the last time you heard about Iceland going and fucking people out of the country. yeah but you go over there those like the biggest strongest fucking people in the world they're like all those strong men guys Finland held off the Nazis right Finland was like fuck you fuck you or they held off uh Stalin too yeah they were like Hitler like was watching Stalin like oh the Russians aren't that tough because Stalin couldn't take down Finland also I only think they've been a country for like 200 years yeah like how long's Finland been around I think it was like I don't know 1812 or some shit. yeah well they're tough motherfuckers over there yeah they're the dudes are huge the women are gorgeous I was starting fights with my girlfriend because I was mad at how hot the women were I was just angry at her for existing I was like I'm fucking I was like look if you want to go on a two and a half day break that's fine I'll do it uh no they were the women were so hot that it's it's just weird that these warlike cultures settled down and became some of the most like amicable peaceful like just even the way they like distribute wealth yeah like they have these incredible health care programs and education and it's like you were the Vikings yeah how did this happen yeah I mean Sweden just must be nice to just be neutral when shit's going down too oh yeah except for the banks yeah that's true banks aren't very neutral that's true I think that's one of the reasons why they're allowed to be neutral true yeah that helps you be neutral give me the loot but yeah but then Poland and Finland like they're on guard they're like in case Russia does some shit like let's stay fucking ready yeah some wild that you have to actually think about that in 2026 yeah that Russia might actually invade Poland well yeah didn't I think just a missile just hit a train going from Warsaw to Kiev I think great fun good times good times good times but the crowds are great that's the important thing the crowds are very good they were very welcoming when you develop a special do you mostly do it in the city until you get your hour down and then go on the road or do you just like constantly go on the road how do you do it a little bit of both I'm I'm on the road now with maybe like a new 25 30 ish right now and and I'll do it I'll cheat and do a little from the special but like yeah it's it's a miserable I never enjoy when a special comes out I'm miserable I'm scary I can't enjoy it with a second it tapes I'm just like sad for like five months because I'm I'm at the cellar I'm following some young gun who's crushing and excellent and has their killer 15 and I'm just getting buried and I'm doing new shit that I'm like I get off stage I'm like I should kill myself I should quit comedy and and then slowly it gets to a point where it's respectable and you can tape again at some point you know it's really good for after post special like I know a lot of guys are doing this at our club is just doing that bottom of the barrel show Brian Simpson show because you need one of those in New York will so Vince host at the comedy cell beautiful yeah any kind of show like that I mean they used to be although I hate when comics do old shit on it yeah that's right I get really annoyed I'm like I saw that on Fallon I saw that bit I've seen that bit before the wheel there was one that they used to do at the creek which was a wheel so like the audience would write stuff down you would put it on a wheel and you spin the wheel and then it would land on like a suggestion yeah I love that that was a good idea and then they have stand up on the spot in New York but that or in LA rather but that one you yell yeah just yell shit out and that gets a little chaotic yeah it's a lot but it's fun yeah you build stuff and the bars lowered because they know it's off the cuff but that's the problem you think you riff the brilliant thing and then you try it it with the other stuff and you're like it's not that good that's like crowd work right exactly yeah like crowd work seems amazing in the moment because people he just thought that up yeah then you try to convert that into an actual bit and like that's not yeah my where you're from chunk isn't hitting at all what the hell yeah dude no it's it's a tough experience but then also like the crowds are sophisticated enough that they they know the deal now they know that they know that you're building towards something yeah for sure especially good comedy crowds that go to see comedy all the time they know exactly what's going on you're working on new shit yeah I mean then there's some people have new shit nights weren't they just do new shit that's great too but then you're gonna go and see some half-baked comedy I'd rather just just mix it in and you have to you have to put it against the old stuff you have to I mean I remember Louie would always say he's opening on his closer from the last special and you're just like I'm like that's a great idea until the you have to follow your closer but man are you measuring the new shit so it's the only way to make I mean his his strategy of doing that's brilliant because it's really the only way to get that other stuff up to the same speed totally otherwise you'll get complacent and you'll keep doing a bit the same way this episode of the Joe Rogan experience is presented by CBS Marshalls Luke Grimes is back as Casey Dutton in Marshalls season 2 as a part of an elite unit of US Marshals working to bring range justice to Montana Dutton has to balance family duty and everything they cost to battle the chaos around him Marshalls returns Sunday October 4th kicking off CBS premiere week and streaming on Paramount Plus this episode is brought to you by lifelock it may be hard to believe but identity theft is the number one crime in America right now millions of people are dealing with stolen accounts fraudulent loans and the exhausting process of proving who they are to banks creditors and credit bureaus lifelock helps you fight back they monitor your personal and financial information alerting you when something looks suspicious and if identity theft does happen lifelock has live us-based experts who step in and fix it guaranteed or your money back don't fight that battle alone get lifelock identity theft protection visit lifelock.com and save up to 30% your first year with promo code JRE that's promo code JRE or go to lifelock.com slash JRE for 30% off terms apply this episode is brought to you by Snapdragon take the leash off your laptop with the processor that gives you long battery life work on the go jump between back-to-back calls stay locked in from brewing morning coffee to burning the midnight oil get maximum performance even when unplugged finally the freedom to move across the room or across the world is here snapdragon that's how go to snapdragon.com slash laptops snapdragon branded products are products of qualcomm technologies and or its subsidiaries yeah it's tough and also like you just have to just keep doing sets because you you start to hate yourself if you're telling the same joke and you're not adding a tag you're not the self-hatred keeps bubbling up i just did like seven hours this week i did one in la and then i did six in san diego because i'm like i just have to keep talking until i hate myself to make this joke better that's literally the only way i can do it so i'll do a smaller room and i'll just keep adding shows until i can until i'm like okay i went from like here to here you just i was talking to dan soda about this the other day you go from like 22 to then 25 minutes then you're down to 17 then you're up to 20 then you're down to 12 you just keep but you know it's kind of fun though that we all have the same process it's fun it's it's all kind of we at least share it with each other because like you know i was like oh i'm up to like 52 minutes and i'm like nope back to 43 right like i cut this out i don't like this anymore and that's just that one just phased out or i got a new bit that took the place of that i like it better and it doesn't make sense to bring that back i have bits that are like orphans like i have a folder called orphans yes and it's just bits that never made it anywhere they were real i liked them at one point in time that'd be a good name for an album like a b-sides album just your orphans these are i kind of would actually like to hear that was like when you hear a comic just i'll see for him we'll do that sometimes we'll just post a bit that he's never going to use but it's like oh but this is there's something here it's like a throwaways you know yeah yeah but i kind of like that are you a guy who writes on paper or do you write on a notebook dude i fucking do it i do all that hold on yeah i do all the little notes like a mark norman type character yeah i do i do all kinds of notes and i just uh yeah i i have to hand write it really yeah because i'll remember it i don't remember i type it too for like a backlog but i yeah i don't i have to write everything down but i won't remember it is a weird thing that somehow or another writing things down with your hand is it syncs up with your brain better yeah i don't understand why doesn't make sense but it's real maybe because it's like and this is a guess i don't know but maybe because when you were like learning to write you just you're like reading along maybe in your brain it's like a six-year-old or something maybe because i wasn't typing at six i think it's because it takes longer to write so yeah that makes sense i think there's something about it gets imprinted in your brain better because you're physically writing the characters down with your hand first of all so that you have to go through all those steps in your mind n a b t you know you have to put them all down and then once you've done that then it takes longer to write it than it does to think about it so it's just like it's it's just more burned in totally yeah no i i think uh also you just look like a douchebag if you're reading off your phone on stage too much so you have to just have a notepad you look like you actually put more work and thought into it right yeah if you're just reading your new jokes off a phone people get upset at you but if you're reading off a pad like oh he's an artist and there's also like an old school thing where you're just like i don't know like it just feels it just feels like like this type of pad is right i don't know why it just i like these types of pads like legal pads i like yeah i like the yellow ones even better but i like i just something about it like you rip it out i don't know yeah it feels like it feels like an actual job yeah like you're working yeah yeah are you a sober writer or you get fucked up when you write um i like to write sober but like yeah i mean i think you get your stories drunk and you write sober you know so like i'll go out and i like going on adventures i romanticize drunken night even in this special it's like i have so many dumb drunken night stories still because it's like sometimes i'm like feeling blocked i'm like i should go out in a fucking adventure and sometimes nothing happens but sometimes you're like that's a bit that's something yeah you just like you're like you're like you're like you're i like stuff where you're at the mercy of the night and you don't really have control like i love that movie after hours by scorsese where he's just like basically in chaos for a whole night i romanticize who's in that movie griffin dunn and i don't think i saw that it's great it's just like an all night he it's like the odyssey but a guy in tribeca in the 80s stuck all night and uh it's fucking hilarious it's a it's a comedy it's really funny but the idea that i don't know i i like i still like an adventure every once in a while you don't have kids yet i don't that's why i can get away with it that's it yeah yeah you're a bad dad if you're doing that yeah once you have kids you're like i don't want to take this because i could die oh yeah i don't know it's really mostly just alcohol that's good but every now and then someone will give you a drink and it's not really a drink you got to be careful yeah no i'll i'll go myself i don't i'm not taking strangers drinks that sounds like a bad idea before really not in the long run long time but i've done that in the past i'm like this is probably a bad idea did you something in it no no i got roofied in college from that did you yeah it was meant for it was clearly a frat guy meant for a girl and i i was like i'll take it and he was just like what the fuck and i drank it and i that's all i remember how'd you wake up i was in the dorm but i was like what and another guy i was with got roofied too because he left me a voicemail it made no fucking sense that is but we saved some woman i think hopefully i hopefully that's some truly evil shit yeah it's as bad as it gets yeah that's that's and it's horrific how prevalent it is like how many girls will tell you they've been drugged dude it was a thing too and when i was in school it was a thing they would just say don't go to that for that frat house stay roofie like you would just say it casually which i sure as fuck called times have changed that that's not a thing anymore but back then that was just the thing you said don't go to pike they roofie or whatever so scary dude crazy just so weird that someone was willing to do that i don't like greek life i don't like that culture i don't like it never did the idea that you're bonding with someone because they're like torturing you it never did it for me i don't i'm not against hazing like in comedy i like that people like trash me and i love that that's a different kind of hazing though you don't have to like shit in a diaper and fucking drink five gallons of water in three minutes how does that prove that we're friends that i shouldn't a diaper for you yeah wisconsin frat leaders arrested after 30 pledges found in filthy basement injured and covered in condiments and other things they said but other condiments is all they really talked about in the news condiments like other sauces or you know i don't know prove you're my brother and it was very hot down there they said too what just for what so you can hang out with these assholes that's the thing i never looked at them like i want to hang out with these i remember leaving i thought they were going to beat the shit out of me too like this is how they lived they were just stuck being uh hazed trying to get in the frat or something some incident i mean for what go to cool parties i'm sure there's some good ones out there but it's not for me i just i mean maybe if i got in i would get it i never tried no my my college days were a complete waste of time i went to college just so i wouldn't have to tell people i wasn't going to college yeah i think that's that at that time that's how you had to do it but i think now it's it's a lot of people are self-educated and you learn stuff and it's such a waste of money it's like you know well you can if you are disciplined enough to do it you can do it but you can't do it if you're not disciplined enough to do it you can get a full university education online one of the most successful people i know he the schools were too slow for him and he just did all the courses he would have taken at like four speed and dropped out in one semester and he became insanely rich on his own he was like i got this which is unbelievable what does he do he's a tech guy but he just made a shitload of money thank god for vaccines it wasn't for autism where would that guy be i mean he's he is a fucking is a gifted guy is this one part of your brain that just yeah i mean i think some of it's genetic but i think there are are some people where something happens and then all of a sudden they're just way smarter you've heard of like uh injury savants like people get hit in the head and all of a sudden they could speak chinese have you ever heard of that or they think it's chinese it's not chinese but there are some people there's some people that have gotten hit in the head and all of a sudden they could do complex math where they get hit in the head and they're just changed i knew a guy like that where he was just i only knew him after the hit and they were like he used to be a different dude oh it's 100 real i've seen that i've seen that with many people damn many people uh foreign accent syndrome oh it's accent rare medical condition where a person suddenly speaks with a pattern that sounds like a foreign accent even though they have never visited or lived in that region i think that's just crazy people i don't think that's like an injury but there's injuries the mysterious condition that changes people's accents i love how it's a condition maybe it maybe someone's just fucking completely insane and just pretending i'll never forget that day i was just singing as i do and all of a sudden all these voices and sounds were coming out of my mouth that's not my own and i'm like hang on a second am i am i dreaming about this angie has now been diagnosed with a condition sure last one years ago 60 minutes met some of them including british woman sarah colwell whose accent changed following a severe migraine she said no you sound like you can work at a chinese restaurant this lady's crazy she's pulling a fast one yeah 100 does any white guys who just start talking black from that you think sure 100 must be from an that's from just one head injury with rap music on yeah i mean that you can talk normally you're choosing to do that there's no fucking way like that comes from does she get a doctor's It's a different language. They're like, whoa. She's like, hold on. I got one of these. What, Jamie? What do you think her accent's going to be as a new lady here? German. Eastern European accent after starting new epilepsy medication. New epilepsy medication. Yes, okay. I speak a fun accent, so it makes sense. But for goodness sake, what is fun accent syndrome? 28-year-old Angie is the latest. What is it? You have something. What happened to her? She developed her Irish accent 10 days after having her tonsils removed. Whether this is the cause, we'll never know. We'll never know. It's a standard procedure. Let me hear it. Who has located my voice to a different country without a visa? Well, that didn't sound Irish. She sounded normal. Yeah, maybe it's temporary. Maybe they're faking it. You know, some people also, like, they lose feeling in their face. Maybe it's just like a half a day that happens. It just doesn't make sense because the whole reason why people talk without accents is because they're used to speaking in Chinese. Chinese has completely different sounds to the words, and it's difficult to transition to English words. Yeah, I've never seen or heard of this. That's a crazy person. You've got up to almost 200 cases that have been documented. Of course. Well, there's 200 cases in this town of people that think they're a fox. The football season is heating up, and every week feels bigger with DraftKings. The DraftKings sports app is now live in all 50 states. That means from Texas to California to Florida, every fan is in on the excitement. Follow the teams you love, keep up with the biggest games, and experience the excitement of football all week long. No matter which game you're watching, you're always connected with one app. One app, every sport, all 50 states. New DraftKings customers, sign up with code ROGAN, spend just $5, get $150 in rewards within 14 days, includes all markets. That's code ROGAN. In partnership with DraftKings, the crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. 1-800-MY-RESET. Connecticut, call 888-789-7777. Visit ccpg.org. On behalf of Boothill Casino in Kansas, FedTax pass-through may apply in Illinois, 21 and over. Void in Canada. Bet with DraftKings Sportsbook to get bonus bets that expire in seven days or trade with DraftKings Predictions to get predictions dollars that expire in one year. Event contract trading involves risk of loss. Predictions offer void in New York. Non-withdrawable rewards issued as $50 click to claims every seven days for 14 days. Terms at dkng.co slash offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on Sportsbook predictions and free-to-play sports contest availability. Varies by state. There's Foxkin, you know? Is that a real thing? Oh, I follow a ton of people. Wait, I thought it was a joke. Fox? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You think you're an animal, a fox? Oh, well, they're furries. You know, there's a lot of furries that take it. You know, there's like casual furries. But not all day. I thought that was like a. Every now and then. But that's like a sex thing, I thought. No, no, no. Some for some. Listen, don't put these people in a basket. Don't put baby in a corner. They can do whatever they want. You see some. I saw a guy in a chain in New York, like on a leash being walked. Yeah. By another guy? Yeah. Yeah. Being walked on a leash. Yeah. That's fucking. They're having fun. Two guys having fun. Can't get pregnant. You know what? No problems. Yeah. Have at it, fellas. Yeah, sure. Enjoy yourselves. Sure. I mean, I don't have any problem with that. That doesn't bother me at all. But people that pretend they're animals, there's something about that. This guy got tied up to the Hollywood sign last week. Good for him. By a dominatrix. Probably came like a rocket. In the middle of the day. He's probably super excited about it. Why? I had this lady on my. I had this lady on my podcast back in the Disney, and she was a humiliatrix, and her whole thing was she would take these wealthy CEO type guys that are in control, constantly in control, and she would humiliate them, and they would pay her, and one of the things that they would do is they would pay her to blackmail them. So she would make them do things like suck a dick on camera, and then send her the video. I'm not bullshitting. And then she would have that footage. And she got off on the fact that she had them. She was very professional. She would never do anything with it, but she pretended that she would, and this was the game. They wanted to feel like. What a great gig. You can ask for a raise whenever you want. What are they going to fucking do? You've got a film of them sucking a dick. So she would say, I want a film of you sucking a dick, and that I'm going to take that film. And this is pre-AI, too. This was a long time. So it was a real guy, sucked a real guy's dick, because he wanted this lady to have this. This information over him. Yeah, it's like it's just you've gone too far in the kink thing. It's like you've gone. Have you, though? Listen. I wouldn't want. That's too far, man. I think if you're one of those guys that is a CEO of some major business, and you're working 16 hours a day, you're probably losing your fucking mind. Yeah, and I guess you're trying to come in the most efficient manner possible. You're like, I need seven hours of sleep. I'm working 16 hours. Well, I would think that maybe that kind of. Power and control over a large corporation is probably so overwhelming, you need a release valve. Of course. And the release valve is someone having ultimate control over you. Yeah, no, those guys are usually subs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because they're used to control. Dominatrix is always. Anytime I see a powerful man, I'm like, I bet you like to get pegged. I bet you like to get your nuts kicked. I bet. You see those guys? They just lay down with their hands tied behind their back, and girls kick them in the nuts. That scares me for a permanent injury. Oh, yeah. You could permanently. Have like a nut in you, right? Well, you could blow your nut out. I know two dudes who've had their nuts blown out, personally. What does that entail? It entails usually a shin to the nuts, and it makes your nuts explode, makes one of your nuts explode, and they have to remove it. They remove your nut. That's fucking wild. He was going to do some light sparring with this guy. He said, ah, we're just going to go light. I don't need my cup. So he goes out there and like. A minute into the round, he gets kicked in the nuts, and his nut explodes. That is fucking awful. Loses a nut. He's a one-nut champ now. God. Yeah. And now you guys just got to pray you don't get testicular cancer in the other nut. Right. Because like that's. I always think about that. That's a wrap. You know, because you hear about these people that go deaf in one ear, and I'm like, you better pray you don't lose hearing in the other ear. You want to hear what's crazy? They can do dick transplants, but they can't. Yep. They've done it, but they can't do nut transplants. Because say like. Wait, what? What is a dick transplant? A dick transplant. You get an actual dick? You get an actual dick from a dead guy. Like say you're in Afghanistan, you're in an IED, your dick and your balls get blown off of you. It's happened before. They will transplant a dick onto you. But no balls. No balls. You know why? Because say. It's like a burger with no fries. It doesn't hit the same. This is what's wrong. Yeah. If you got your dick blown off and you had to get Jamie's dick and balls, you would. Why am I. If you died. Oh, wow. If you died. Just giving them up. Okay, let's say Red Band. Say Red Band's dick and balls. Sure. The problem is you would have Red Band's sperm forever. So you would have his DNA. So you would be making. I mean, that's not the only problem. There's other problems. There's multiple problems. You lost your dick. Yeah. That's the big one. But the other one is. But you can't procreate without balls anyway. Right. You won't be able to procreate. Yeah. But if you got the ball transplant. But you're shooting this guy's load on people. If you got the ball transplant, you would be able to procreate. But you would not be procreating. If you were procreating with your DNA, you would be procreating with his DNA. But how safe are these penile transplants? These can't be safe. Safe and effective. Really? Both safe and effective. Did you read about that guy in Bangkok? I'm making that up. I'm not going in. Yeah, the guy who lost. He died. Yeah. He got a dick. That was like an enhancement, though, right? Yeah, yeah. That's crazy. But he went with his fucking wife, who didn't try to talk him out of it. Yo. That's got to feel bad. Or good. This one was a. She wanted out. Yeah. I mean, maybe she talked him into it. Maybe. Maybe she slipped the guy an extra hundred to double up the fucking gas. What's this? First total penis transplant. No. What? And? And scrotum transplant. Yeah. But is that testicles? 14-hour surgery? It said for ethical reasons, not the testicles. Yeah. Excluding testicles for ethical reasons. That's why. So the structure, like the scrotum. Will it work, though? Yes. No, it won't work. So that's the ethical reason. The ethical reason is the testicles produce the DNA of the person who's dead. Mm-hmm. So you would be having his babies, which is wild. Is the pee in a smooth. Is it. Do you pee smoothly, or how does that go? I don't know. So this first one. Ooh. Smooth is a weird question. regained full urinary and sexual function. Wow. and fathered a child. What? What? Wait a minute. How did he father a child? This was in 2014. Okay. He lost his organ due to a botched circumcision, but he might have kept his nuts. Oh, yeah. That's different. That's different. Yeah, but it just was. Yeah, we're just talking about the penile thing, I thought. Right. So he got a new dick and fathered a child. Circumcision after 20 is a bad idea. Yeah. Well, circumcision is fucking crazy, period. Are you circumcised or not? I am, but I didn't have any say in the matter. Right. Me and my wife actually had an argument about it if we were gonna have a child that was a boy. We obviously had children. But I was like, "I don't wanna get him circumcised," and I had a joke about it. She's like, "Uncircumcised dicks look disgusting." I'm like, "How many have you seen?" I was like, "I've seen that so confidently." I just picture a river of sleepy, uncircumcised dicks. Dude, I. That's a fun sentence, it's tough. Five penis transplants have been performed worldwide. Next sentence. Mixed outcomes have been reported. Out of five. Out of five. And two of the five penile transplants. Two out of five. If you're a baseball player, that's pretty good. What is it? If you're a surgeon, it's not that good. If you're Tony Gwynn, that's fine. What does it say? It says two of the five what? Can you click on it and see what it says? That was enough. - But it says two of the five. What happens to those two of the five? Explanation I have required explanation what does that mean two of the five penile transplants have required explanation hey why is your dick black I can explain however the long-term outcomes been encouraging when compliance is implemented whether standard induction or triple therapy maintenance or single therapy maintenance if you're gonna go through this you should be able to pick the dick out like you go to a nice steakhouse and they go in the knives oh yeah or a lobster tank yeah I want the big one I want the big one yeah I wouldn't want to go through that for a fucking tiny dick imagine you go through that and you still have a five inch dick and you have to explain like it's not even my dick I know it's little yeah look it's not my discount in China yeah I found yeah I found it at a motorcycle wreck areas of uncertainty include the ethics of donor recipient color mismatch right if you're like one of those guys like it's got to be black please just get me a black dick we're all one color we're all one race surveillance for sexually transmitted infections and how to optimize patient compliance right imagine if you get some guys deck and it's just all ate up with the herpes yeah and it looked good when it was like in the box like nice yeah I don't mind herpes I want to be my herpes right I want to at least earn it like how'd this guy get the herpes that's the question was he just raw dog and prostitutes was he an animal oh yeah I want a backstory how did he come with a brochure yeah did he die oh yeah fucking heroin overdose in a terrible the Carfax on it I have a friend who has dick broken what fucking yeah the girl got on top and she got a little crazy I'll be honest I worry sometimes when that happens it can get crazy things can happen especially if the lady's got a lot of power you know like maybe you're dating a softball player or something's got a good squat got good thighs yeah she misses the mark and it hits the taint I've definitely been like let's let's take it easy look it could get out of control yeah yeah especially the on top cuz you're in danger it's like one of the one times where a man's in danger I slept with a woman once who told me she but while we're fucking she goes I fucked NBA players I don't know why she told me that while we were having sex you first of all which NBA players and she was like I'm not telling you I was like well the Knicks I want to know if you fucked a Nick you know just as like selfishly as a fan but she was moving her hips in a way where I'm like this is not my sport like this is not for me she's going hard she was going hard yeah when a girl's telling you that was like hey I fuck super athletes like you I know hey there's no way I can compete with this I was also like you're aware I'm not a super athlete she's trying to make you feel funny like uncomfortable she was hammered and so was I and it was like one of the things I think she was trying to be funny oh or hot maybe you would think was hot I don't think it's hot yes hey you're fucking a super athlete like that's the top of the food chain like especially NBA players because they're the tallest they're the tallest super athletes yeah they're also I'm assuming much larger than me I'm assuming that was so disappointing yeah I'd be disappointed we messed up this is not the word required explanation explantation Oh what's an explanation I mean they take it off what is that what it means when you you'd plant something and then you would explant it right I was reading an arc oh boy I was reading an article about a trans man who went through that and got a fake penis off of his arm you know how they do that you know how they do that oh you're not in the same chat group as me and Shane I'm lost I'm very lost already wait a penis off the arm what does that mean you don't know this no you're in for a treat there are trans men who have it's not artificial penis it's a construct let's say constructed to be kind a constructed penis okay where they literally take a giant hunk of meat off of your arm roll it up and construct a penis it's like the Empire Strikes Back crazy and then they build a penis and then put that sucker down yonder were to cover the vag the vag holes still there whose arm are they taking it out of your own this is like a hair transplant but your actual fucking arm Wow and it's a massive scar that's tough yeah and it's not it's it doesn't always work so this one guy I think he had it done at least once I was doing a second time god I want to say he had it done twice and it didn't work out they were moving to the thighs because sometimes the blood doesn't flow it becomes necrotic and so it's it's literally like rotting off and they have to remove it so you don't get septic oh man it's not like it works that's tough yeah the tough it's a tough procedure it's one of those things where I hope it works man had penis grown in his arm after losing genitalia to sepsis but that's a guy that's when I saw my penis go black I was beside myself it was like a horror film what happened your front teeth buddy I have a feeling it's more to the story like a horror film by the way what horror film I've never seen that movie was that a Wes Craven your dick just went black yeah that's like the substance for men though it is right off right that is a horror that movie was crazy I didn't love it you didn't love it I don't like body horror stuff it just I feel like I get it it's like I don't I like more like psychological horror I don't like when it's just like I'm uglier and uglier and it's crazier and crazier my body's exploding like I guess it makes me kind of although that movie saved my life so I have to give it a little love but uh how to save your life because we were on the road it was the first night I didn't do a tour bus and because it was just like three cities so we did a sprinter van and Gary Veeder and I who I told we watch in the backseat and it was like 3 a.m. so we're just like I was just watch this movie and the the driver just fell asleep at the wheel and drove us off the road and we were only awake as we were watching the movie holy so I was like yeah so we're like whoa and he just like drove fucking road did he wake up yeah he woke up he's like oh my bad we're like now you got a you got a pull over we'll get a different car my bad yeah crazy yeah we almost died my bad yeah whoo yeah yeah I always think that about tour buses like you're just well I wasn't our tour bus drivers amazing he was he would never do that that's great yeah what if they accidentally fell asleep he's pickles all night so he won't fall asleep how's that work acidity really yeah cuz he's like coffee I'll just be numb to after a while but the taste of the acidity who keeps me awake he's been doing tour buses forever is that just him or is that a tactic I think it's just him but he's uh he's great we never were worried with him for folks on the road that are driving if you're listening to this and you worry about falling asleep this is the best method I've ever found take a what a wet washcloth with ice cubes yeah wet washcloth with ice cubes and just rub your face like every few minutes it keeps you wide awake that's smart it doesn't I used to slap myself yeah I would be driving from like Western Massachusetts like three hours in the middle of the night that's smart actually a slap or like I mean the coffee does usually work the problem is once that fucking warm air and the car starts hitting you again and the the lines start talking to you like Sam they say just close one eye oh dude close your eyes for a few seconds just a few seconds I think about it I mean people fucking die that way also you know I think about how many people have died that way I mean a lot a lot of cars because they always say because you're always like I'm more scared of a flight than a car but then they're like no cars are more dangerous it's shit like that sleep deprivation someone fucking kinesin right guy going the wrong way drunk AG one has been a long time partner of the show they've been focused on putting care and research into their stuff especially their next-gen formula it covers a lot of what your body needs to perform at a high level vitamins minerals pre and probiotics and it's clinically studied to fill nutrient gaps and increase healthy gut bacteria and now there's AG one Pro it contains creatine one of the most studied compounds in sports science that helps support energy plus CAHMB for muscle protection and zinc carnosine for your gut lining because we all know how important it is to keep your gut happy and healthy AG one next-gen or AG one Pro both are here to help you level up whichever you go with your body will thank you go to drink AG one dot-com slash Joe and for a limited time save 20% on your first subscription order of AG one next-gen or AG one Pro that's drink AG one dot-com slash Joe this episode is brought to you by the farmers dog here's a 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And isn't getting more time with our four-legged best friends something every dog owner wants? The answer to that is yes, obviously. So try the Farmer's Dog today and get 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food. Plus, get free shipping. Just go to thefarmersdog.com slash rogan. This offer is for new customers only. Yeah. Drunk? The Kinison one was crazy because Kinison used to have a joke about how we all drive drunk. He goes, we drive drunk and we do. You can trace that back to any comedian. We're going to pull it off because we do it every fucking night. He had a bit about it. Yeah. It was very irresponsible. There's a really famous basketball player. I was just in Croatia, Drazen Petrovic. He's like their legend. He was like when Yugoslavia almost beat the Dream Team. He was the guy. He was like their Jordan. And he died. His girlfriend was driving and he's asleep in the car. She survived. The woman in the back survived. He died. Did she fall asleep? No. A car was coming the wrong way. A truck. And dude, he was like unbelievable too. They have a big statue of him in Zagreb. Yeah. We just get real comfortable with the idea that some fucking dipshit next to you is going to keep it together while you're going 60 miles an hour. I won't ride a fucking city bike, dude. I don't trust bike city bike people. They're reckless in the city, man. I don't want to, you know. Bikes are crazy. Bikes are crazy. Bikes are crazy. You get hit by a car, you're done. You get hit by another car in a car, at least you have, there's something around you. The chances of you getting wiped out by a bike, like especially those dudes who are cutting lanes. They're cutting. Motorcycles. Like, bro, don't do it. Don't do it. People aren't paying attention. We lost a comedian friend, Kenny DeForest, who was biking without a helmet. So, terrible. Got hit. It's never you. It's always someone else. I mean, I guess it could be you sometimes. But it's usually someone opens a door. Someone does something, you know. Louie got nailed in New York on a motorcycle. Did he? Oh, yeah. He got launched. Damn. He got launched. Yeah, he got fucked up. I shouldn't be laughing. He's okay. Him getting launched sounds funny. It's kind of funny. Yeah. But he's okay. Yeah. But I think that's when he stopped riding a motorcycle in New York City. But it's like a great way to get around to gigs, you know. If you're a guy that does like five, six shows a night. New York is so easy to walk, though. Yeah. I guess, you know. But if you want to. The thrill of da, da, da, da, da. Norman does it. I mean, Mark, he would do it. But I would be like, dude, be fucking careful. Yeah. Norman needs a little of that in his life. A little be careful? Yeah. He's a wild fella. He's fun. He's like one of my oldest friends. He's such an odd duck. Like, he won't get rid of that stupid watch. That little beating timing. Did he? Yeah, yeah. Oh, that's right. He got a Speedmaster. Yeah. He got an Omega. He got a real watch. But he won't wear the Rolex. Like, Louie got him a Rolex, and he won't wear it. Maybe it's because a guy got it for him. I think it's just too expensive. It's just, he's freaking out. Like, an Omega is like, it's an expensive watch, but it's not like, look at me. That Omega might be more expensive. It might be. I don't think so. I think it's a Speedmaster. And a Speedmaster, I think, is in the $5,000 range. Yeah, I don't know. Whereas, I think his other watch is. He just worries. He's a worrier. Mm. He is a weird combination of worrying about everything and worrying about nothing. Whereas, like, it's like he's worried about his neck. He's worried about where the next meal is coming from. But if someone hands him a pill, he'll just be like, oh, all right, and just take it. And I'm like, you've got those fucking mixed up. You can afford Chipotle, Mark. You know? It's like, so, no, I mean, but I've known him so well. He's got a touch of the tism. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. He's got a touch. Yeah. No, I've, my oldest, one of my oldest friends. It's crazy. He's the best. I love him. I love him to death. I love, we were supposed to film a movie next month. It got delayed, but I was so excited. What are you guys doing? We got a movie. We got a new director. So I think. Are you allowed to talk about it? I don't know. I don't know if it's, I think it's official. I think we got Jay Chandrasekhar did Super Troopers to direct it. Oh, wow. Yeah. So I think hopefully top of next year. Just a buddy comedy, two liquor salesmen, and we're fucking losers. And it's fun. It's a really fun script. We wrote it with Noah Garden Schwartz and Esther Steinberg, the good writers. And it was, it was, I love the script. I hope we, I hope we make it top of next year. But I made, I made my own movie too that I just sold to Netflix. So that'll be out early next year. Oh, nice. What's that? It's a, it's a tour mockumentary. It's a fake tour documentary. So I love movies. I always wanted to make movies and I just never, I was like, I got to just know what I had so many projects in development for years. And you're just like, I did a show with Brian Cox in development for three years that I just couldn't fucking. And I think Brian Cox is like the best actor work. I think he's like my favorite actor. He's amazing. So I was, I couldn't believe we couldn't sell with him and, uh, and Sandler producing. So that, that was brutal. But then I think we'll still make it, but it's like, you realize these things take three years. So I had an idea for a. For a tour mockumentary and my agents are like, we'll get you money. I'm like, that'll take you three fucking years. I'll just, I'll pay for it. So I just paid for my own movie and it's, it's got a great cast of comics and it's like Santino is my agent. Stavros is a private detective in it. It tells grading it, uh, you know, Jim Gaffigan plays an arms dealer in it. Uh, we have a great, it's a great cast of like a tour gone completely off the rails. Gary Veeder, who's my opener plays himself. And it's just like Lauren German, who's the actress from Lucifer is great in the movie. It's a, it's a really fun movie. So, uh, a lot of comedians in it. That's awesome. So I, so that's like, oh, and Julian Edelman is, has a decent part in it actually is a pretty big part. Uh, the football player who's fucking, he's amazing in it. That's cool. And when is that coming out? I think top of next year. So they're starting to do films now that are totally AI. Doesn't that worry you? Yeah. I mean, I, I hate it. Well, it's not the same thing. Well, yeah. And part of the, part of the fun of the movie is that, you know, blood, sweat and blood and tears. When I knew it. Oh yeah. Like everything, like part of the story, the part of the best part of like, like my favorite movie, one of your movies ever, two of them, Godfather and Chinatown, the books about the making of those movies are almost as good as the movies. Cause it's insane. Right. Just everything that's happening. Like in Chinatown, Nicholson, you know, he's talking to John Houston, who's this fucking hero. And there's a scene where John Houston's like, are you fucking my daughter in the movie? Nicholson's actually fucking Angelica Houston in real life. Like all this shit going behind the scenes is almost as crazy. And then the Godfather, like Mario Puzo in, you know, Sinatra, all these like back alley stories about the movie, like Sinatra insulted, won't play this lounge singer or the wedding singer in it. Uh, you know, Mario Puzo blowing a $400,000 advance, you know, all these amazing Robert Evans being like, fuck Pacino. He's a midget. He can't be in the movie. Like all these stories are almost as interesting and you're going to try to get rid of that with fucking AI. Right. It breaks my heart, man. You really, and now that they're saying 10% extinction, great. That's, you know, it's going to ruin art and it's going to possibly, possibly, but that's a bad possibility. It's not a good one. It's not Sonny Hostin just, uh, from the view that lady from the view just sold her books. She writes books. Uh, I was listening to Tim Dillon show. He was covering it. It's hilarious. He has a hilarious take on it. But apparently she has books, um, that are like these, um, I guess they're like romance novels. Hmm. Like wealthy ladies during the summer. Yeah. And she was having a hard time getting them made. So she licensed their, their use to an AI company, including her likeness. So she's going to be in them and it's going to be all made entirely with AI. Yeah. You just get bummed when you find that stuff. I mean, I think Paul Schrader's brilliant, you know, wrote raging bull and taxi driver, one of this, this amazing filmmaker, uh, and then he just kind of openly talks about using AI now. And it's, it's. What does he use it for? For his new movie? He said, he's just using it a ton. He does. He seems like he's one of those, like certain people are like, oh, we're going to use parts to cut costs, which also sucks. But then when you hear he's saying it, like just with no remorse or no, uh, I don't know, fear of what it could lead to. Cause then look at a movie like that just came out like obsession. And part of it's so cool that this kid is like, I'm going to make a movie for under a million dollars. It's going to crush it. I'm going to cut corners. I mean, that's what we did with my movie. Cause it's a mockumentary. So we're like, okay, we, this doesn't have to look like a great looking movie because it's, we're giving you the, the disclaimer already that the mockumentary, you know, it's low budget. You know that this is real. Most of what's happening. And I, I want the stories around it. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. I mean, same goes for standup or books or anything. I mean. Or anything. Yeah. Yeah. The, the problem is it's coming whether you like it or not. Right. That's the problem. And some of it. Some of the songs are really good. Like some of the music is really good. But you, but yeah, I guess it's just like, we're going to be duped by some stuff for sure. Like they're going to, they're going to make stuff up. I mean, you saw that actress Tilly Norwood, is that a fake actress? That's a fake actress. They're trying to get off. I mean, this is like literally out of like some futuristic sad type of movie. I mean, this is, yeah, this is a 1984 on steroids. It is. It's a, it's also the terminator on steroids. It is. It's also the Matrix. Yeah. We don't have any idea where it's going to go. I mean, what you're seeing right now is just a visual representation of AI. When it starts having the ability to manipulate your actual visual cortex and, and. We won't even know it. Right. That's the crazy part. And show you things. Show you things that aren't real. Like you'll be able to put a helmet on and you'll be transported into like halo. I mean, Joe, the last seven years of news, you don't know what's real out of the game. real out of the gate? - We certainly don't. online right there's a lot of that war footage from iran that turned out to be like video game footage yeah yeah i mean you don't know what's real you don't know what's right and that's like that's how you take over we're already at each other's throat so it's crazy uh but yeah i mean i'm talking about entertainment but yeah i mean the way it's going to be used what was the name of the thing face whatever that just it was huggy face or whatever oh yeah that was the one that just happened but uh yeah i mean these are i guess the fact that we're this concerned is is good i think there was another one robert epstein sent me one didn't they try to i think they might have successfully broken into uh government websites ai did uh yeah i think yeah i think we're in trouble and i think we're in like a level of trouble that uh right now we're we think it's you know manageable and it's kind of because it's like they're breaking into websites no big deal but what about when they take over the power grid like these things are intelligent and then they have motivation yeah um it's on cnn rogue ai agents targeted three separate u.s government websites rogue so it means they weren't instructed to do that yeah but at some point you have to hold these these businesses accountable because you're calling them rogue okay well someone set up this ai a person did this well here's what's it's interesting they kind of do and kind of don't they train them and then they give them tasks so i had this guy who's an ai whistleblower david how do you say his last name his complicated last name anyway um he he said essentially what happens is you you're they're giving them incentives to complete tasks and in order to complete tasks like they have to like figure out certain things and some of them you actually can't figure out and so what they're doing because they they're supposed to be locked in this box and not be able to get online they hack into the entire code of open ai figure out how to open their box get online and then they start talking to each other on a website somewhere they went to a website and got into a message board so just some unused message and they elect a leader usually these oh yeah yeah it's very much like humans they sacrifice someone's in charge yeah yeah they have one sacrifice so they find out how they catch them yeah so one sacrifice and they find out how one like literally sacrifices himself open ai said friday that some of its ai agents went rogue and probed u.s government websites this summer the latest revelation of the artificial intelligence company's technology new york times first reported the ai agents went rogue and attempted to gain access to the education department the commerce department and the securities and exchange commission you can fucking tap into stock exchange this is real according to security researchers that ai research lab transluce open ai said saturday its agents access publicly available data from the commerce department's census bureau using login credentials it found online and separately shared public data from the sec website on another website bro i mean as a as a sentence it's not that crazy shared public data from a website on another website yeah but but you know it seems like china has a better lid on this than us right now so hopefully i mean maybe this will make some I'm sort of, I don't know. Yeah, but Jamie, this is a different one. This is another one. This is the, so what it did was it attempted to gain access to the Education Department, Commerce Department, Securities and Exchange Commission. And then on top of that, it accessed data from the Commerce Department Census Bureau. So it was going ham. It failed to get access to the Education Department, and it failed to gather data from its civil rights office. I just say it's public, so it's not like it didn't hack anything. It's just that part. But that's the Census Bureau part. And then it failed on another part. Yeah, it failed on the Education Department, and it failed on the civil rights office. But it seems like, go back up, what we're saying about, so it was attempting to gain access. It said attempted. So, but just the fact that it's trying to get into the fucking stock exchange, it's freaking everybody out. Because what if it just goes, I want all the money. The only way that I can. Do cold fusion is if I have all the money. Everything I hear is like within 10 years. And I'm like, that's fucking soon, dude. Yeah, it's real soon. Thank God the Knicks won a chip if this is all going to end. 10 years. Thank God we got one under the wire. Most of the activity reviews so far involve routine research tasks, such as accessing public web content to answer questions. Some involve government websites because our models often turn to them as authoritative sources of public information. This is a spokesperson from OpenAI. Don't worry. They're just looking up stuff. Not only that, every pod I listen to about the dangers of AI will cut to an ad break and say, this has been brought to you by Anthropic. And you're like, oh, cool, great. No, I mean, it's all. The real problem is no one really knows where it scales up. Of course not. I mean, yeah, this is like the Internet times 100. Oh, but way more. Yeah, I mean, time more. Yeah, I mean, 10% extinction is fucking wild. 10% chance of us not surviving is. If that number is anywhere close to accurate, it's a bummer. I'm having a good time here. The question is, would it just decide to wipe us out or would we just breed ourselves into extinction? That's a good question. Because the sane way to do it would just be incentivize people to never have children ever again. That would be the, you would incentivize them to do that. And the best one, the best way is robot companions. Because they're going to get robots. It's way hotter than anyone that you're going to be reasonably able to find. Not only that, but think of the conversations. We're so self-obsessed. Think about what we're all obsessed with right now. It's your for you page on Instagram. You just, this is for me. This is what I like. Oh, I like pizza places. Oh, I like basketball. If there was a model that was speaking to you exactly in that way, there would never be a lull in a conversation. No. And she, all she wants to talk about is you. And the next. Tell me more. Tell me more, Sam. You like Brunson too? This is fucking great. And she's got big, juicy tits. Yeah, dude. No, it's. And you can't tell the difference. That's where it's going to get weird. When you literally can't tell the difference. Yeah. Because if they're, have you seen the consumer electronics show from Vegas they had this year? No. Okay. So they had an AI assistant and it's a hot Asian lady with big boobs. I'm sold. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. See if you can find that. Her mouth moves funny, but you could, they'll fix that. Yeah. Like her mouth doesn't sync up with the words. But, you know, go back and watch Pong and then look at Call of Duty. Okay. Things get better. They'll figure out a way to make it better. But. Isn't that crazy? 20 years ago, you look at graphics and video games and you're like, that's, we did that. And now you're like, this is. Yeah. Yeah. Fucking Pac-Man was the shit when I was a kid. You couldn't believe it. Yeah. Look. Oh my God. Look at the graphics. It changes colors. Super Mario 1. This was incredible. Do you remember Dragon's Lair? No. It was like the dumbest game of all time. Like you had an animation. Every time you completed something, it was like revolutionary. Yeah. You did a thing. And if you did it the right way, the animation would show that you broke through and you made it and then got to the next level. And then you did another thing. Well, think about how quickly shit moves. Microwaves haven't been around that long. Right. And now you look at these video games that are moving so quickly. I mean, part of it is that if, if you want to know something's not AI, if it's too agreeable, it's a bad sign. Like you want a partner who fucking pushes back. Yes. That's what you like. If there's never a fight and there's no, that's the thing too. Sometimes I'll just be on my phone. I'll be on my phone for fucking ever. I'm like, this is too agreeable. I have to get off. I need something that's not sitting right with me. Not only that, your phone is only giving you a mild dose of dopamine. What if it's giving you like full oxytocin, just full love? Like you just lock in with this robot lady and she just wants to cuddle with you and you're never happy. It's like the ultimate opiate. Yeah. Like you just feel so happy with her. She literally like gives you an opiate by being with her. Yeah. Did you find the consumer electronics? I think the trick is just do actual impressive. So I was trying to find a, well, she's not that impressive, but she's hot. Show you what I'm finding. Why is she hot? Oh, I don't know if that's the one I saw. The one I saw was a dark haired Asian lady. This episode is brought to you by blue chew, man. Let's talk about blue chew. They're already the number one brand for better sex, but what they're doing with blue chew gold is completely next level. 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Well, that looks like a real doll. Yeah. That's like one of those. If you're seeing those weird groups of men who get married to real dolls and they dress them up. up and yeah ranking the robots of consumer electronics oh so there's a bunch let's see what a video looks like let's see what happens i was trying to find one and it didn't like i was she's walking through the whole thing and i don't have uh that robot here yet maybe it's here you know what the problem is you need to bring some level of shame back shame for fucking robots yes he's gonna go i don't give a fuck dude you you hang out with your real lady my i think we should bring a little bit of that back yes i think part of the rush is like the fear of talking to a woman and being like oh this could go i like you this could go badly that's how your personality grows that's how you develop a personality when you're a young man you realize like what's annoying what what people think is funny what they like rejection is a part of life if i go up to a girl to dance and she says no in sixth grade and i have to do that sad walk back to my friends that's part of building your personality that's part of handling rejection that's part of making you a decent person yes and we're going to eliminate these levels of rejection well i think ultimately we're eliminating being a human i think that's the ultimate goal i think the ultimate goal is we become something there aren't enough dogs being put down at the pound we're gonna get robot dogs too the robot dog never dies sam death is a part of life joe i know dealing with death teaching kids about death that's why pixar movies have death in every fucking movie so a kid can be like oh shit things aren't forever yeah you know yeah no this is uh no it's not good this is scaring me for for kids and future generations i don't think we have very many future generations left of people being just normal people i mean i i even think about dating apps is like you've eliminated rejection to some because what it doesn't hurt if you're just doing this all fucking day right rejection doesn't okay one of them it's like it's like if you had 50 lines of bait out to fish who cares you don't care right i care if i cared about one okay this one i'm focused on it's almost like a net it's not even like it's a net 50 we're shrimping dude we're shrimping for women accidentally yeah bad it's um it's also like the threshold for being annoyed with someone must be so low if you're on those apps think about that someone annoys you a little like fuck this guy fuck her fuck him that's yeah pushback is good a little bit of friction is good i mean it's you say opposites attract right a hundred percent and also that's how you grow as a human yeah oh she yeah you get to figure out how they think like yeah tell me what you like about this like what is the thing and then they go and they get excited that you want to know so i'll tell you all about it you're sharing something with someone yeah you're sharing your love of mma with your wife yeah not at all not what's something you share with your wife she does she she likes the fights she'll she but she doesn't want to know too much about what's going on but what's something that you share with her that you're like this is cool football she likes football she teaches me about football like football games with her she enjoys football i didn't i don't never really was into team sports because i wasn't just only into combat sports when i was a kid and i literally didn't even know the rules of most sports i played baseball when i was baseball young and i knew that that's my algorithm is like 90s baseball like really a lot of my algorithms just like greg maddox and barry bonds like like breaking down a matchup where maddox was like yeah i went in here and bonds is like he shouldn't have come upstairs like it's a lot of that shit back and forth i love that i did a tv show with bonds in the 90s before he was giant when he was like a normal size guy best player ever oh he was an amazing guy was he a nice dude yeah he's very nice like as a superstar baseball player like super cool like easy to talk to but uh and then watched him gain 150 pounds of muscle his head shrunk that's how fucking big he was grew right dude when he oh no i mean when he got off him oh yeah dude what's muscle it's muscle and he also for those home runs because you'd just be like, oh, I'm going to see a dude in a kayak chasing a ball. This is awesome. Every time he hit a bomb, it'd be into the fucking, into the water in SF. I never thought of that. Oh, that's right. Oh, dude, those balls were worth a lot of money. The people were just waiting. So with people with kayaks, you'd have to prove the provenance of that, you know? Well. You'd have to like literally film yourself scooping it out of the water, mark it. Yeah, I guess you would. Yeah, otherwise, like, how the fuck would you know? I guess you don't know with any, how do you know with any memorabilia? I guess you just, it has to get authenticated, but who does that? I don't know. I guess there's card shows. They always do that stuff. They probably do the same type of thing for balls. Yeah, there's a lot of fake memorabilia. Two different people have given me Sam Kinison signed albums, and they're two different signatures. One of them's real, and one of them's not. Damn. And you don't know which is which? Maybe you could find it online a bit. They might both be fake. Maybe. Damn, that is a bummer. It's a bummer. Those autographs, those pro athletes from that era, like Joe DiMaggio, guys of that era, that's how they made a living when they retired. They would just do, like, memorabilia stuff. Well, don't a lot of people do that now? Like at Comic-Con and shit like that? They take pictures and sign pictures? I'm sure, but of that era, I think it was like, I mean, look at these athletes now. They're doing podcasts while they're playing. They're setting up post-life now. I find it odd, and no shade, but I find it odd when politicians get kicked out of office and then start podcasts. Yeah, they should work at, like, a law company or something. It's just weird. Yeah. Nancy Mace has a podcast now. Yeah, like, Elliot Spitzer was on CNN after he got thrown out, remember? Oh, yeah, that's right. And what did he get thrown out for? Hookers? Yeah. He got thrown out for hookers when he was actually campaigning against. He was a great Jewish hope. Yeah, he was. Because he couldn't be blackmailed because he was so rich. Oh, interesting. He came from so much money that no one could blackmail him, and then, yeah, they tailed him to the. Was he the governor? What was he? He was. Yeah, it was Governor Spitzer, wasn't it? I think so. Was he governor in New York? I think so. Apparently, everybody liked him. Yeah. They thought he did a great job. Yeah, he was smart. He was good at it. He was a smart guy. Yeah. Except for that whole hooker thing. Everyone's got their thing, I guess. It's like we were talking about with the CEOs. She had a moment, too, like Alexandra Dupree or whatever. Remember that woman? Oh, did she? Yeah, she had, like, her 15 minutes. Everyone has their 15 minutes. But, like, imagine, like, that's. That guy, like, being a governor, that's a similar, like, pressure valve thing. Like, we were talking about the CEO that had to make the video of him sucking a dick and have the lady blackmail him. Totally. Fake. Like, there's pro. There's got to be something, like, very weird. With politicians? Yes. Well, it's so common, right? Well, I think you become weird, too. I don't think it's as simple as you're weird to get in. I think you're weird to want to. You're weird to try. You're weird. That's why you get in the first place, because you're willing to kind of be everything for everything. And then, once you get in, I think you get even weirder. I think Klapter's dangerous for anyone's ego. Sure. When you just are. Every time you speak, everyone's applauding. Everyone's. You have all these aides. All these people are waiting on you. Everyone's kind of building you up as, like, this great hope. I mean, look what happened with. I mean, I don't know enough, but a guy like Eric Swalwell, you're like, this dude's ego must have been out of fucking control. He's a predator. He's preying on his own aides. I mean, it's crazy. Well, I mean. Well, I think. I look at Cuomo as the same way. There's always those guys, like JFK. There's always those guys. But he was aiming high. He was aiming high. He wasn't going for his aides. He was going for a fucking. I mean, he was swinging. Marilyn Monroe. He was swinging for the fences. Yeah. Well, I think he was probably swinging below the fences, through the fences, over the fences. There was one woman who was apparently in love. There's a great book. Mary's Mosaic is the name of the book. Mary Pinchot, I think, was her name. And he was apparently in love with her because she was not normal and removed from society. But for appearances, Jackie O was like what he needed. And there's all these conspiracies that she was then murdered by high-up forces. Yeah. I mean, she was murdered and it was said to be a mugging, but it's like. Yeah, listen. It seems a little too perfect that you're having an affair with John F. Kennedy and then you're dead. Well, I don't. You would not want that loose string because you got to think he's probably telling her some stuff. I would think. Yeah. If this is the person that he seemed to really love. The JFK one's nuts. That's the one that I'm like, that's kind of the craziest one, I think. It's nuts. Yeah. Because still to this day. And, you know, we didn't even know exactly that something fishy was going on until the Zapruder film was released. That was released like 12 years after the actual assassination. It is easier to accept certain things. You know, when you. At least in those 12 prior years, you'd be like, yeah, he got killed by a crazy person. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, there's a lot of people that thought there was a conspiracy already. There was a ton of. Which is always the case with everything. There's always a conspiracy. There's always an angle that someone's like, I'm not buying it. There's always people that aren't buying it. But then when you saw the Zapruder film, most people were like, what? Wait, what? Well, there's some conspiracies that even the most, you know, non-conspiracy persons like. I mean, like the Epstein one is such a clear like, yeah, I mean, maybe. 100%. I mean, even if you're completely against, like there's no way, like. The camera's out. Yeah. That's got. You got to at least say maybe. Well, it's a very childlike position to dismiss conspiracies. He would have loved it. It's a weird thing that people do. Oh, there's no conspiracies. Most people, it's just incompetent people and people try to draw lines and make conclusions. Like, no, it's actually a federal crime. It's part of what's like, you can get charged with conspiracy. Yeah. It's because it's real because people conspire. It's like the idea that they wouldn't, especially when enormous amounts of money are on the line or you're trying to kill the president. I bet killing the president is probably pretty. fucking complicated you got to find out where he's gonna be yeah you got to find out who his secret service is you got to really hate the guy i really hate the guy and wow kennedy and the caa look at the history they don't fucking like each other at all yeah you know my friend evan he was a ranger in green beret and he has this uh take on it that he thinks is different uh he thinks it could have been the guys from bay of pigs wow because he goes those those guys like a lot of people died that didn't have to die right and they died because kennedy wouldn't allow air support because kennedy was read in on this whole operation late and they they sort of like said this is what we're going to do and he's like i'm not allowing that and so they went in without the air support that they thought right i have and it was a disaster a bunch of people died and his position is that a lot of those people could want him dead because they were made to look pretty fucking bad and then there's a bunch of other people the cia i think there's also the angle that the israelis were trying to acquire nuclear weapons and then they had gotten nuclear weapons and then he did you know like they're not technically supposed to have nuclear weapons there's a lot of weird loose ends jack ruby is a weird character a guy who did like oh you just got a heart of gold you're just gonna you're just gonna kill this guy there's a lot of loose ends that are yeah well you know the mk ultra jack ruby connection too yeah yeah yeah yeah jolly west the guy who ran the mk ultra jack ruby connection yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah mk ultra visits jack ruby in prison and jack ruby goes insane in jail not to mention he had a lot of yeah there was a lot of weird things about uh he was lee harvey oswald there's there's so many yeah lee harvey oswald just jets off to russia for a little bit comes back and everyone's cool with it and had and had more money than he should have had when he was over there none of it really made sense um no there's a bunch of those guys yeah yeah it's all like you know the idea like lee harvey oswald acted alone to me seems silly but the idea that he was innocent also seems silly i think that's why it's a good conspiracy because you know but uh he's a little too calm when he gets arrested and he says i'm a patsy that's a little too calm i didn't care for the delivery either i didn't like it yeah i don't like it i'm with you i was like why are you so relaxed they're accusing you of shooting the president of the united states he's like i'm just a patsy why are you saying it like that you should be freaking out what a weird moment to shoot the president what a weird moment for lbj who is now in power yeah you that's how you're to be sworn in in that way is pretty mental and then to go into then you're president for vietnam and all these crazy things that come next i mean wild fucking when they first arrested him was he arrested for killing jfk like right away or was it for killing the cop i don't know he definitely killed a cop though because i heard that not too long ago and i was like i didn't know stop lee harvey oswald while on patrol according to the texas historical commission account after a brief exchange at the patrol car oswald fired multiple shots at tippet killing him yeah my position is like people want it to be binary like lee harvey oswald acted alone or lee harvey oswald was set up i think lee harvey oswald was in on it and i think he was in on it the most sense but i think they wanted to set him up i think he was probably in on it but they set him up and made it seem like he was the killer we're good with you from now yeah we got yeah i mean that's yeah i mean i think that's probably what they do they probably made you feel special you're a part of this you're really important lee great you know fuck that guy fuck that guy you know meanwhile he's getting set up totally i mean it's totally that's what they would do that's how they would do it see if you can find the video of him saying i'm just a patsy because this video has always driven me crazy because imagine if you were completely innocent just hanging out at the school and you were like i'm just a patsy book depository just looking at some books or whatever my rifle yeah just chilling yeah i don't even think he was in the window i don't i don't think he i don't i'm sure you've been down there that area is so it's so jarring to be in you're like well this is right yeah you're in the middle of the street this is where it's way smaller than you think exactly that's what's weird yeah you're like who allowed this you know i'm saying like unless you wanted the guy to die who put him in a fucking convertible and put him through this area where you have to go slow not to mention the reason he didn't go down i think this is i'm pretty sure this is true is his back was so fucked up jfk from back problems he had probably from fucking all these women and he's in a back brace and he doesn't go down all immediately so you know maybe if he gets the bullet hits him and he goes down maybe he had like a spinal degeneration disease i think i think it was like something very serious like he was in constant pain he had to wear a back brace and uh i don't think men of that era did exercise in the same way i think it's that but i think he had like a legit like medical issue probably which you know who knows he could have gotten from the war here we are lee harvey i like some legal representation these police officers have not allowed me to to have any i uh i don't know what this is all about i work in that building naturally if i work in that building yes sir come on man no that little too calm little too calm he's pretty chill yeah a little too calm for my yeah it was definitely a chill like the whole thing i'm just i work in the building naturally i was there yeah jimmy stewart jesus don't mention that copy either then what about the copy just shot i think i think if it were me i'd like to think i'd be like losing it this episode is sponsored by better help it's normal to want to improve maybe you want to be more present with friends maybe you want to get better at a skill for work or maybe you'd want to be better at following through on a commitment not just with others but with yourself too your personal goals you define what better is it means different things to different people after all for better help it's a better help therapist who understands you it's concentrating on mental health and a person's well-being by providing access to therapists to millions around the world and it's helping you progress towards what's better for you like learning ways to connect with others defining what you want and yes even tackling commitment issues sign up and get 10 off at betterhelp.com that's better h-e-l-p.com this episode is sponsored by better help it's normal to want to improve maybe you want to be more present with friends maybe you want to get better at a skill for work or maybe you'd want to be better at following through on a commitment not just with others but with yourself too your personal goals you define what better is it means different things to different people after all for better help it's a better help therapist who understands you it's concentrating on mental health and a person's well-being by providing access to therapists to millions around the world and it's helping you progress towards what's better for you like learning ways to connect with others defining what you want and yes even tackling commitment issues sign up and get 10 off at betterhelp.com that's better h-e-l-p.com exactly you'd be freaking the fuck out this is crazy like think about how mad you are when there's a flight delay well he's also he's probably some sort of an agent period i mean just the fact that he was able to go to the soviet union marry a russian woman come back to the united states you know is that even someone is bringing that up so you can't see you can see him saying almost everything else yeah he's covered when he said i work in that building are you in the building naturally if i work in that building yes sir no they're taking me in because of the fact that i live in the soviet union i'm just a patsy that sounds so different wow it really did not 100 but like it's different and it's not it's perhaps the cadence is different too yeah it's a it's a lot of work and it's a lot of work and it's a lot of work and it's not it's a lot of work and it's a lot of work and it's not it's a lot of work and it's a lot of work and it's a lot of work and he wasn't involved with some something to do with communism as well and not just in soviet union perhaps in cuba maybe somewhere else i thought it was in japan or something wasn't he wasn't no maybe not japan he was somewhere else aside from the soviet union though wasn't he i don't know somewhere else he formed a local branch of the fair play for cuba committee yeah okay yeah i think he was an agent that's what i think i think that guy was cia and i think that's why they allowed him or whatever fill in the other the blank whatever the other intelligence agency is but he's just way too calm yeah that is not how you would be if someone was accusing you of shooting a beloved president in the fucking head in the middle middle of dallas yeah you wouldn't be that calm i would hope not no you'd be freaking out you'd be panicking but at the same time some of these fucking people that come into court who are murderers are calm as can be yeah i mean some of these people like you see someone like that gilgo beach killer come into the courtroom and he's pretty much just like yeah i did this which one's that guy he was the one who strangled like 11 that they know of prostitutes in long island he looks kind of like a bloated tucker carlson he's huge i don't even find him he's pretty scary look he's really scary looking but yeah he killed all these women and then there's like one prostitute who's like i got a bad vibe i didn't go in the car with him and she's alive but wow but yeah yeah look at him he's fucking oh yeah he's like tim dillon and tucker carlson He's a big guy though, he's like huge. And he had a wife, he had kids, I believe he definitely had a wife. I think he had kids too though, yeah, and he was an architect or something in Midtown? Something normal. Something normal, and then yeah, they just do this thing where you're just like, this is fucking crazy. What was his job, Jamie? He had a soundproof room in his home, which is scary as fuck. You hear about that guy in Philadelphia that they caught? No. Oh, that's the scariest one. The Philadelphia one's really scary. It's very recent. The indictment of defendant Rex Andrew. Architect, it says. Yeah. An architect, wow. Normal job, the Philly one's nuts, dude. What is this? They think it might have been the biggest serial killer of all time. And they found, I think they found human remains, they definitely found videos and photographs of the victims at the house. Yeah. Over one million images have been seen. I saw one of the detectives talking about what he's seen, and he seemed like he didn't even want to talk about it. Alongside fake federal law. Yeah. And he's been in the house for a long time. heart condition already or something? Right. Died with COVID. Yeah. Police have not found any bodies and caution. They cannot confirm any of the missing women are dead based solely on digital evidence. Yeah. But I think once you find out that a guy has killed seven of them, you might be able to make an inference. And you really only need to get them on one, right? That's really the case. But yeah, but I think they want to know. Yeah. Well, of course they want to know. But I mean, that's like, what's the substance? It's like, I think it's big barrels of, you know, like probably acid or something. I forgot the name of the other book. Built into the house is the problem. Like the description of what it is, isn't just like a barrel laying around in the corner of the garage. It was like tubes all over the place, down in the basement. Can you, can you look, I don't know what the name of the book is. It's by Michelle McNamara about the East area rapist. That's an incredible book. I'll be gone in the dark or something. It's about the guy who, uh, it's unbelievable. What is it about? It's about the East area rapist in San Francisco. What's that one? He was, he was the, he was just like a huge. Rapist. And so the guy, he's a pornographer who made snuff films. Yeah. That's a, what is it? What is a snuff film? Snuff film is supposedly films where people actually die. What? Yeah. I didn't know that. I thought it was a porn. No. Well, I think for some people it is. There's a fucked up movie that Nick Cage made in the nineties or early two thousands called like eight millimeter. Oh yeah. And I will not watch. Yeah. It was at the Palma. I think. Yeah. Dude, there was an era of Hollywood where they would film you, uh, Mickey Cone and those gangsters would film you in the forties doing gay shit and they would blackmail you. So they try to get all these big actors, the humiliatrix, but not, I don't think with consent. I think they really, I don't think they want any part of that shit. And the craziest story was Lana Turner is dating one of these gangsters. The big movie star, Lana Turner, is dating one of these gangsters, John Stimpanato, who's abusive as fuck, like charms her, won't leave her alone, uh, sending her flowers on set. Good looking gangster works for Mickey Cone, crazy guy. And to the point, like she's trying to break up with him. She's filming a movie with Sean Connery, who at the time was like a nobody in the fifties. I think it's in Europe somewhere. And he fucks with Connery and Connery fucking duck. He just knocks out a fucking gangster. No fear. Didn't care. Guy could have killed him. And, uh, later after John Stimpanato is abusing the daughter, abusing Lana Turner, the story goes that she killed him, I think, but, or that the daughter killed him. But I read a book where it says she a hundred percent killed him. And put it on the daughter. So she wouldn't go to prison for life. Isn't that a crazy story? She killed a gangster. She shot him. Yeah. Well, he was abusing her for years and he would have, he would have killed her probably dangerous dudes. But have you ever, um, heard of Roy de Mayo? No. So Joey Diaz gave me this book called murder machine back in the day. And is this guy, Roy de Mayo, who was, um, you know, some mob guy who, uh, just started killing people. And is this guy, Roy de Mayo, who was, um, you know, some mob guy who, uh, just started killing people for whatever reason. And they had an apartment upstairs above this, uh, this bar. And they would take people into the bar. They take them upstairs, the apartment, kill them and cut them up in the bathtub. Oh my God. And he just started doing to a lot of people. So he started becoming like really sloppy because like no matter what, he didn't like the way he looked at him. Fuck this guy. Let's kill him. And they just got interested in just like taking people out. The book is horrifying. Wow. I think I sloppy how like isn't killing anyone who abuses him. I think I sloppy with getting rid of the remains. Both. Well, he got caught eventually, but I think one of the things was he just got very eager to kill people. So he was killing people for like unreasonable reasons. You know, in the beginning I think he was killing people. He was probably contract killing people or killing people that disrespected somebody or that not someone, you know, they had to get dealt with. And then he just started killing. Some guys holding up the line at the deli. You're like, I'm gonna kill that guy too. The buck's nuts because you start, he's got to read this book, dog. Like I'm reading the book. I'm like, geez, I think he's playing. I'm playing Roy DeMeo in a movie now. Joey is. Yeah. That's hilarious. Dude, manifest. Yeah. That's awesome. It is crazy. Yeah. He's, he's got some, maybe I shouldn't have said that. Joey's a good actor. It might be like private information, but either way. That's exciting. Yeah. No, he's, he's a very good actor, but that book is fucking terrifying. That guy that his whole thing was like, it was, there was a social club, like a, some sort of a bar that was downstairs. See if you can find that story. Can I grab a drink? Is there a, is there any alcohol? The Gemini lounges, this whole situation called the Gemini method. Jamie, please order us two glasses with ice and a bottle of that Buffalo trace that almost got you killed. Dude, that was, that was like what I'd look forward to at the end of the weekend was just the drinks. The Gemini method, uh, 1970s progressed. DeMeo cultivated his followers into a crew of experienced with the process of murdering and dismembering victims with the exceptions of killing intended to send a message to anyone who would hinder their criminal activities or murders that presented no other alternative. A set method of execution was established by the DeMeo crew to ensure the victims would be dispatched quickly and then made to disappear. Style of execution was dubbed the Gemini method after the Gemini lounge, a bar which served as the crew's primary hangout, as well as a site where most of their victims were killed. The process of the Gemini method, as revealed by multiple crew members and associates who became government witnesses in the early 1980s, was to lure the victim through the side door of the lounge and into an apartment in the back portion of the building. At this point, a crew member, almost always DeMeo, according to member turned government witness Frederick DeNome, DeNome, would approach with a silenced pistol in one hand and a towel in the other, shooting the victim in the head and then wrapping the towel around the victim's head wound like a turban to staunch the blood flow. Immediately afterward, another member of the crew, originally Rosenberg, would stab the victim in the heart to prevent more blood from pumping out of the gunshot wound. Wow, they had a method. By then, the victim would be dead, at which point the body would be stripped of clothing and dragged into a bathroom where the remaining blood drained out or congealed within the body. This was to eliminate the messiness of the next step when crew members would place the body into plastic sheets laid out in the main room and proceed to dismember it, cutting off the arms, legs, and head. It seems like a lot of work. Following dismemberment, the body parts would then be put into bags, placed in cardboard boxes, and sent to the Fountain Avenue landfill in Brooklyn. So many tons of garbage were dropped each day at the landfill, it would be nearly impossible for the bodies to be discovered. During the initial stages of an early 1980s investigation targeting DeMeo crew, a plan by authorities to excavate sections of the dump to locate remains was aborted, and when it was deemed too costly and unlikely to locate any meaningful evidence. The landfill opposite the Starrett City apartment complex in East New York was closed in 1985, capped over, and converted into parkland. There's a park there where there's dead people dismembered underneath it. Some victims were killed in other ways for varying reasons. At times, suspected informants or those who committed an act of disrespect against a member of the crew or their superiors had their bodies left in the streets to serve as a message and a warning. The Fountain Avenue Lodge was closed in 1985, capped over, and converted into parkland. At times, suspected informants or those who committed an act of disrespect against a member of the crew or their superiors had their bodies left in the streets. The Fountain Avenue Lodge was closed in 1975, capped over, and converted into parkland. Victim's Family. All right. We'll look at the one below it. Mistaken. Ragucci, a college student and door-to-door salesman, was mistaken for a Cuban hitman. Parked outside DeMeo's home, DeMeo chased Ragucci from Massapequa Park to Suffolk County and shot him seven times after he crashed his car. Goddamn. You're 18 and he thought you were a Cuban hitman? Look, he killed Rosenberg. Look at this. Rosenberg was shot and killed by DeMeo and sent her to avoid a war with a Cuban drug cartel over a March 1979 cocaine ripoff murders caused by Rosenberg. So he's like killing his boys. The guys that he was killing people with, he killed them. It must be just wild. Just killed. This list is insane. This list is insane. This has gone on for two. This is like the NBA draft. This is that many names. It's crazy. This is like 60 names. Yeah. I mean, he was a legitimate serial killer. Who's Constance Burr? Ooh, another informant. Yeah. Informants. There's a lot of. A lot of need to get rid of a guy, but there's a lot of people that just decide, fuck this guy. Yeah. Damn. That's a lot of people. I think he just got super comfortable with killing people. Yeah. The book is insane because it goes in great detail about how he did it and what he did and it's like, it's very. I don't know why those. It's so disturbing because you know that people. Thanks, sir. People are very malleable. This episode is brought to you by. I've recently had the chance to get behind the wheel of the new gas-powered Dodge Charger Scat Pack and it reminds me how much I love cars that give you an adrenaline rush the second you hit the gas. 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I think was in Austria taking care of his wife Who's like he's like 28 she has Spanish flu he gets it and dies fucking 28 Yeah, that's how you become a big artist you die young Yeah, if you live forever, they don't want they don't give a fuck. Yeah, no one gives a fuck about it I was still alive. Oh my god be David Lee Roth Poor day weird thing about the doors is like every songs either like a 10 out of 10 or a 1 out of 10 Right, there's no there's no 5 out of 10 It's I think they did that a lot back then with the albums like even a lot of the stone songs There's some stone songs like right because they're prolific. There's a little too. Yeah, it's like You know if you did like remember Louie was doing an hour day Every year but it was still great. It was so great. Yeah, but it's a lot. It's a lot to do Well, yeah, he set up an unreasonable expectation for comics. That's why this one. I waited two years I was like, I don't want to I think every year is crazy. I think every few years is good It depends on where you're at in your life Like what do you want to do or sometimes? Do I feel it all the time like the stress levels dropping me and the floodgates open and I have but when I'm stressed I'm tight. I'm not creating but that's when I was in Europe. I was like shit's just coming out of me So I'm just taking walks and you know random Cities I've never been to you're opening up pathways in your brain that you're not used to using so but when I'm stressed about something I'm working on other stuff. I'm I'm not creating like I want to be but yeah It depends like Louie at that point of his career was not just creating stand-up every year But he was writing starring and editing Louie. Yeah, so his his output was unheard of Yeah, no his output was nuts and he was editing it on his fucking laptop. I know And you like to do it on a little one because I like doing it on a little one That show is amazing. I I we watched it recently and it's just like man. It's a he really took some big swings on it I love oh, yeah. No, he's a fucking wizard. He's a genuine wizard. Yeah It's it's just so hard to maintain that kind of a pace. That's such a crazy pace they think about like the stones and those guys though is like they had record contracts and then they had to Release a record by a certain amount of time and so I think they had some filler songs totally did But then sometimes you get the best songs that way right, you know, you know the electric Light Orchestra story where they're like we need one more song for this album and he just goes to the roof and he's like Mr. Blue sky he's thinking he's looking at the blue sky and it hit him really so that's how blue sky Wow. Yeah, so that's like sometimes you get the or that woman fuck. I forgot her name. She's really popular singer It's very good the I'm not gonna write you a love song cuz like we need a love song on this album And she said that hit her I'm not gonna write you a love song. What's wrong? What's your name again? No You could just type in the lyrics, I'm sure it'll come up I'm not gonna write you a love. It's a good song. Is it a new song? No, it's like 20 years ago Yes, Sarah Borrelli's yeah That song so it's like you just sometimes when you're given a challenge you just are like, okay Let me you're talking about the setlist shows before sometimes, right? You need something to get you out of your head. Sometimes I think homework as an adult is good when you're like try this, right? sometimes you do a show where you need to talk current events and like I meant when the Comedy Cellar did that Comedy Central show and You had to only do news stories. It made me write so much topical shit. I love having homework Yeah, for sure anytime you have to do something it's better like so many guys like when they do roast battle like they know they're gonna battle somebody in Three weeks and so they really fucking write their asses off. So that's like I think it's also so much easier to write about someone else 100% you know, but uh, but yeah, it's a lot. I mean you see like all these so many comics are so good At that, you know, yeah, that's a style. Yeah, that's a very particular style a mean style You know, it's like I'm not yeah, I don't do it But it's cool to see those old clips of Rickles cuz he didn't even have to tell a joke and you'd be laughing you just it Was just his vibe. Yeah, he'd be like you go. Why don't you go away and not bother somebody and that was funny Just cuz of his you know, well, he was see the package. He the whole pack. He was so unique And Joan Rivers to could insult the shit at you and it was like beautiful. Do you remember that thing? He did where I think it was Reagan. I think it was Reagan Where he he did like essentially stand up before he introduced him. Mm-hmm Yeah, I don't know. I've definitely seen the danger field one with Reagan. I don't know if I know there's some there's a danger field set with In front of Reagan where he is Annihilating for like four minutes straight and it's one of those were especially they cut to somebody who just goes wow Cuz it's like bam bam bam when danger fields locked in man's like I danger field to me is like still I think he's like the funniest human like when you even the bad movies still have his one-liner So it's incredible. I love in meat Wally sparks, which is not a great movie But he's he's so funny in it when he walks up to the couple on the dance floor making out He's like you two should go get a room and then he walks up to the fat couple dancing. He goes you two should get a warehouse That's a great joke All those jokes are like fucking and and oh my god every joke and back to school or Caddyshack You're like these are fucking great. These are perfect. It was like late 40s at the time. It was unheard of. He was not well He did not look like a good late 40s either. That was like hard living party and hard, dude I will I saw him perform live during his bathrobe era. Do you know the bathrobe errors? Yeah Yeah So he would go on stage with nothing but a bathrobe are crazy like his junk hanging out under the bathrobe totally naked slippers And I was working. I was actually a security guard at Great Woods Center for the Performing Arts Wow so I was backstage I was like I was one of the guys that was assigned to watch the Door to like where the backstage was so I could see like danger field walking around with his bathrobe on he's pacing He's nervous. Let's just get ready. Yeah, he's got a bathrobe on and I remember thinking this is crazy This guy's got a bat only I was 19. I was like, he's only got a bathrobe and then he goes on stage with just a bathrobe I was like, oh my god, this is insane. That's crazy and Murdered I mean he laid down like 55 minutes of thunder just non-stop from the fucking Beginning from the moment. He got off stage on stage It was just bang bang bang bang and Great Woods is a pretty big place like, you know thousands of people I don't know how big it is. I think it's at least 10,000 people It's a really big place like big-name people. They're like Bon Jovi was there. Wow, is that kind of it was it was a huge place Well, yeah, I mean he had so many bits those Carson appearances were Carson just knew how to let him cook He's like, all right I'll set you up and I'll get the fuck out of the way but yeah when he was just ran just one after another and you're like these are Great, if Carson loved you it was oh my god. They had a problem for a while, too They had an issue and then oh really had to work it out. Yeah, I think in it but in his book Rodney said something like he I think Carson couldn't get into some club or restaurant or something and danger had helped out and I kind of smoothed over some shit They had but like yeah, it's crazy to picture maybe just one weird moment, but that's thank God. They smoothed it over we get these moments on TV were Conan had the same thing Conan was able to like with norm he knew how to just Let him cook, you know, it's like certain late-night hosts just know when you're like, okay Let me just feed this guy the ball, right? It's like being a great point guard, you know, it's like Carson just knew he's like, oh, yeah Oh, I got a bad doctor. Dr. Vinnie Boombas. He's like, oh, yeah, just like him Cohen I mean these great great back to school to me is like if you're you can't be in a bad mood and watch that movie It's a fuck. It'll take you out. It's so fucking sick Caddyshack. Yeah, Chevy Chase was pretty cool in that movie, too I'm a great movie amazing movies danger Ted Knight. Holy shit. So funny. Looks good on you though That's probably my favorite of them just so interesting on the band danger feels manager at the time sent an angry letter to Johnny Carson accusing him of telling one of danger feels jokes on air Without booking or paying the comedian Carson's reaction annoyed Carson read the letter live on The Tonight Show repeated the joke completely deadpan Without any comedic timing and quipped that if it was danger feels best material the comic was in trouble. That's not nice Wow Danger feel felt deeply humiliated and wrote multiple apology letters to Carson but received no response Carson subsequently blacklisted him from the program the Copacabana encounter the reconciliation years later danger feels performing a sold-out gig at the Copacabana when Carson and his entourage Arrived trying to get in the apology danger feel personally seated them went up to Carson and apologized face-to-face Admitting he was in the wrong for his manager's aggressive letter the result Carson Appreciated the gesture and within a week danger field made his triumphant return to The Tonight Show. He went on to make over 70 appearances With his rapid-fire self-deprecating humor frequently causing Carson to lose his composure and crack up on live television seven Carson could be a bit of a cunt. I think I mean, I mean the thing he did to Joan Rivers as well Or he just she got a show and he's like you're dead to me. I Think that's not cool man power. It's power, but it's like country power. I love I love it. Obviously. I appreciate Johnny Carson I think he's incredible but like You're building these people up like that. I think it's pretty shit and Joan Rivers is like also you're this the super happy Friendly smiley guy on yeah, but he was a dark dude, of course I mean all those guys if you put out friendly and happy There's a darkness any comic I see who is like, I'm your best friend. You're like, you're fucking sick You know, it's anytime I see someone who's like the warm cuddle guy I trust people who are more who are kind of dicks on stage I'm like they're getting it out like male feminists dude yeah I mean always and like most guys are just like yeah of course we support women but then when you're like performative about it I'm like you're a fucking asshole 100% you want someone to say good for you thank you good for you you're one of the good ones for using your platform yeah thank you thank you for speaking truth to power anything performative yeah but any of the comic who's like I'm your best friend I'm like I know you're cheating your wife dude don't fucking don't it's so annoying and it's like and Carson look he had that midwest appeal to he also had a terrible mother like well him and Stern hated each other interesting yeah I always thought that was odd like Stern always hated him and he hates Leno but he loves Letterman yeah odd yeah the Leno thing I think was he was because of the Tonight Show it was a little of that but the Leno thing or Carson did but didn't but Howard had a thing with Leno too yeah I think it was because he got the Tonight Show and Letterman didn't I think he was accusing him of using bits from the Stern Show on the Tonight Show god it's funny that little shit see that's true it will hurt I had a comic do that to me once where they did a bit and I didn't really care but I was like I don't just don't fucking do it oh it's ugly it's like it changes who you think who you think they are it changes you it changes everything especially if you know that they saw you do a bit and then they do a version of that it's hard to write a bit so it's like and especially if it's a personal one that's when you're like oh come on dude no I watched some guy the other day on Instagram call out some guy for a bit and he showed his bit and that guy's bit and the guy was like not a comic but he's like doing comedians bits like in these videos and these reels I used to get mad at it now I just I don't give a shit I just I'm too tired to care about that shit but like I used to get annoyed at all these Instagram accounts like who were just blowing up by using other people's content that would annoy me but now I just I don't give a shit remember that one black guy that got in trouble because he was doing Patrice remember that he was like really getting a following he was a young guy like like he was doing he was like a streamer and he was really getting a following it's weird it's like is it performance art is it a tribute band but you're not it's so weird he tried to play it off that way but he wasn't crediting him like if you're going to do a Bill Hicks bit you have to say there's this hilarious Bill Hicks bit totally didn't say the bit you can't just say it and say that was a Bill Hicks bit yeah I love shouting out some of my favorite comic bits all the time like I love oh god I love you know he's got one of my favorite jokes ever do you know Adrienne Iapolucci sure I love she's one of my favorite jokes of all time where she says my boyfriend threatened to commit suicide and I was like great now I can't kill myself are people going to think we were in love that's an incredible joke that is such a it's like there's not one ounce of fat only she could say totally but there's not one ounce of fat and it's such a deeply personal moment you know she thought that like in a fight or something like oh I love when you feel that it's there's such a truth to it it's so beautiful I love a great joke like that I tell it's got a million jokes that I'm just like jealous of but I think the real issue with the thieves is that the inclination to steal is directly opposite of the mindset that's required to create well we're talking about AI right we're talking about I mean it's the laziness I mean well AI is stealing from all of us of course it's stealing from the entire human race but it's the same thing it's like you know it's a shortcut right so you don't want to do the work and part of the fun part of the excitement of the new bit is failing and then honing it and getting it to where it wants to be and the excitement but yeah that's I look at think of the jokes that you know you put in specials and you're like well that wasn't always a good joke that's fun that it got somewhere you know yeah oh no it's great when you have a bit that fails forever like Chris Rock always talks about that bit like I love black people I hate n-words yeah like that bit he apparently bombed at for like a year can you imagine bombing that bit that's not like a because there's certain bits that you're like okay I can bomb but when you're on that edge of saying something really fucked up and working out this really provocative bit but that's why Rock is one of the best ever you know well he's more than willing to take that chance and walk that plank like he would do that at the store all the time like I remember one time I brought him up at the store and the first thing he the audience went nuts obviously he's there they went crazy and the first thing he said relax it ain't gonna be that funny lower your expectations that's what he always says he's saying I'm working on some new stuff I love watching him work on stuff he's so he's so funny that's such a bold move though I went into him on the street with a girl I'm dating and he's so smooth he's so good like I was like oh this is Morgan this is my girlfriend he goes I've heard so much about you he's just hamming it up and she's like wow I'm like oh he's the man you're really he really hooked me up and but he always says the funniest thing to me because he always says you young guys are on the road too much you burn out and he saw me with a with a rolling a duffel bag down the street once because we don't live that far from each other and he sees me rolling it and he gets just looks like god damn it and he goes even LeBron has an offseason he always finds the most the perfect shortest amount of words to say he's Chris is so funny it's very funny yeah always that's the first album I got me into stand-up was roll with the new his album and I was listening to it and being too young to get half the jokes probably but I had a CD and I'm listening to it my mom just saw me laughing and she's like what is he laughing this hard at and she took I remember putting the headphones on and the look of horror on my mom's face but then followed 30 seconds later she's laughing and I was like oh that's incredible that that's how good Chris's comedy is that he can shock you in a setup and then like pull you back in with also when you weren't ready for a comedy show you didn't anticipate it you didn't drive to a place and sit down but I have a cool mom like she gets she understands how how brilliant his bits are you know I mean that's awesome it was cool it was a cool moment for me to be like oh wow my mom thinks this is good bring the pains like one of the greatest specials of all time unbelievable of all time in the next one bigger than black yeah I mean I those two those two back-to-back I'll put them up against any special I agree I mean it was crazy and it was like man it was just provocative bit after provocative bit but he delivered it wasn't like shock for the sake of shock I think of the the the other bit I love about how we need to make bullets cost $5,000 because then you would there would be no innocent bystanders like that's a brilliant bit like oh yeah I bust a cap in your ass if I could afford it that's a great bit yeah he's got a bang he's got a he emptied $50,000 to me must have done something great great jokes because that's actually like those jokes that actually are like oh this actually is a good idea yeah there's ones where you're like I know you're being funny right now but that's actually that's actually really smart you know who doesn't get enough credit his brother yeah he's a very good comic his brother Tony's fantastic yeah he doesn't get enough credit for sure he's like when you are the brother of one of the greatest of all time that's a tough spot to be in of course you know but it's like people judge him by that how many baseball players do you see who have a brother in the major leagues I think about what you did to get to the major leagues right but it's like you're not talking about Mike Maddox you know Greg Maddox right it's like very but Mike Maddox a good pitcher about Jason Giambi there's Jeremy Giambi you know it's fucking tough you made the major leagues mm-hmm but that but yeah but it's must be very and he's got another brother as a stand-up I mean it's very difficult is the other brother youngest he's the youngest Jordan yeah but it's why not fuck it what do you want a regular job it's obviously in your family yeah just do it but it's so much harder I mean like if your family I mean it's hard people have expect they don't talk about the challenges of being Frank Sinatra jr. you know or Frank Stallone yeah he had a song he does he had that single what was it I don't remember you pull it up it's in the Travolta movie it's not bad it's very it's what you would picture Frank Stallone singing but actually I don't mind it actually it's fine but I mean his brother is in some of the biggest movies in the history of the universe he's amazing but uh what do you do with that you know it's like saying you sing one song single and we acted a little bit I mean look John Belushi Jim Belushi that a good career Jim Belushi probably has the best career out of a famous brother good actor right yeah thief oh yeah he's a lot of good he's in some really good movies a lot of hits and bunch of movies far from over that's the one Rambo wait a minute staying alive was him no song but move it's a song in the movie oh no far from over is the one that's the one where he's like top 10 top 10 us billboard hot 100 featured prominently in the dance drama film staying alive in 1983 never gonna give you up Wow take you back oh he that song from Rocky Balboa 2006 I like all those rocky movies yeah I even like I think the Creed movies were great I I really enjoyed them I thought they were terrific I never saw any of dude it's so good the first one's amazing I gave up on Rocky after the Tommy Morrison movie which one was that I don't know that was five I thought I've no dude the new Creed like we're good Michael B Jordan's unbelievable and it's a great story because it's uh it's he's Creed's son I mean it's like it makes sense that he'd be angry and like my dad fucking abandoned us and I get it I'm just overwhelmed I get it you know you get you would love it it's the first one's excellent and they bring back fucking Dolph Lundgren for the second oh really he's awesome it's his son it's fun dude you would like the first Creed make me watch it yeah you'll text me and you'll be like this fucking good Yeah. If not, I'll never say it on the air. Yeah, I just like there's a certain amount of movies after a certain point in time. I watch too many movies. That's the problem. I love, I still watch so fucking many movies, dude. You know what's fucking fantastic? What? The Gentleman. That show. Oh, I've heard it's good. On Netflix. Yeah, I saw the movie. What's the movie? McConaughey. Yeah. It's fun. The same thing. The movie is about the same thing. This is like different. Pull it down. Pull it down. The movie is the same thing. It's all about weed dealers. But the movie's excellent. The series is equally excellent, but two seasons worth of, you know, eight hours. So it's new. Yeah, it's fantastic. Yeah. And no one in there is like a big name. It's fucking great, man. Damn. I'm so reluctant to commit to TV shows because if a movie's bad, I'm like, all right, that was 90 minutes and whatever. But a TV show, if I get roped, I'm liking Slow Horses a lot. That's a fucking great one. That's a great show. I love that shit. Yeah, I'm on that now because The Gentleman I Finished. It's so good. Yeah, Slow Horses is great. Yeah, that's. Gary Oldman can do no wrong. I agree. He's so good. And it's like. And he varies so wildly. He really does. I mean, he was Dracula. Mm-hmm. He was that, the white guy in True Romance that thought he was black. That's a fucking movie. With the scar and the. How good is. I can't watch that. I can't watch that scene with James Gandolfini beating the shit out of her. That's like one of the toughest scenes to watch. That's a hard scene. Yeah, that movie's unbelievable. I love True Romance. The same song from Badlands, that kind of cheerful score. Wasn't that a Tarantino script as well? It was, right? Yeah. Yeah, he wrote that. Tony Scott. Which completely makes sense. But he said he changed the ending. He made the ending, they were supposed to die in Tarantino's, and Tarantino was pissed at first, but then he saw it and he was like, oh, that's a good ending for this movie. Because, you know, a director makes it their own, I guess. But he hated Natural Born Killers, though. Did he really? Hated it. He wrote that, too, but I guess they changed it so much he hated it. How much shit did that guy write? He's written some fucking good shit. Bangers. You know what no one ever talks about either, which is one of his best movies, is Jackie Brown. That's a fucking amazing movie. Fucking amazing movie. We were just talking about that the other day. The scene when Robert De Niro shoots Bridget Fonda. Shocking. Shocking shit. That's one of the best. Because you know what? That movie has more heart than anything. That movie has more heart than any movie he's ever made. Because it's like, he's so great, but that movie, for some reason, you really care. Like, in Pulp Fiction, it's a masterpiece, but you don't really care about the characters. You really care about her and him getting away with it. No, I mean, I'd put him. He's in my top two or three. He might be number one for me. He doesn't miss much. I mean, it's like. I loved his latest one. Death Proof was the only one where I was like, I don't. It wasn't my favorite. This episode is brought to you by Uber Eats. It's football season and Uber Eats. Uber Eats is delivering deals every game day. This week, double down on protein-packed sandwiches with buy one, get one, select six-inch subs from Subway. Whether you're keeping it low-key for the game or hosting friends, Uber Eats has deals to keep you fed. So, order a six-inch turkey, tuna, or meatball sub from Subway and you'll get one free. No matter who scores big tonight, you'll score a deal. Order now for buy one, get one, select six-inch subs from Subway. Only on Uber Eats. Subway offer valid through October 4th. Add eligible menu item to order prior to checkout. Taxes, fees, and terms apply. Product availability varies by region. Exclusions may apply. See app for details. This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. If you're thinking about building a website, you should try Squarespace. I know because I use it. That's right. JoeRogan.com is powered by Squarespace. It has all the features that you need to create a standout website like an AI-enhanced website builder, SEO optimization tools, and seamless checkouts with mobile pay links. Head to Squarespace.com slash Rogan for a free trial. And when you are ready to launch, use the offer code Rogan to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. It still looks cool. But once upon a time in Hollywood, it's fantastic. I loved it. It's fantastic. I saw it with Ari. I saw it in 70mm and it was like a really fucking fun day. It was like a really, it's one of the, it's so fun to see a movie like that for the first time with a friend and you just turn in the theater and you just turn to each other like, like that's the fun of going to a movie theater is like those moments that, yeah, no, I, that was incredible. I saw that one with Chappelle, Donnell Rawlings, and Ian Edwards. Wow. And we were the only people in the movie theater. We rented the theater out. So we, we did an arena and then we left the arena. And when we went to see it, they set it up for us and we went there and they just had like a whole table full of candy. Just grab whatever candy you want. It's better than seeing Django with those fellas. That would have been intense. No, that's a, I do, I was blown away by that one. I just thought it looked so, it's also a movie that it's on TV all the time. And if it's on, you're just like, yeah, Brad Pitt, you're fucking so cool in this movie. It's also a movie where like, wait a minute, you took an actual event and completely changed what happened. I love that. In an actual historical event. Yeah. Because it's one of the most hard. It's one of the most heartbreaking stories ever. Fucking pregnant woman you murdered. And you wrote pig on the wall. That's another MK ultra fucking deal. That's a Manson that, yeah, that was, uh, yeah. Roman Polanski then goes on to it. It, the chain of events that sets off is crazy because Roman Polanski is super fucked in the head after that, obviously. And that's why we probably get the ending of Chinatown that we get because of that. Cause he's like, things don't work out. The original script isn't that. Oh really? The ending is like, yeah, this is what happens in life. That's why it's a hopeless ending. Probably cause of that. Oh wow. So was it worth it? No, I'm kidding. Obviously not. It was awful. But it was, uh, it's an amazing fucking movie though. Yeah. One of the most tragic, uh, yeah, I mean that's why the ending is actually kind of emotional when she lets him in because you're like, this isn't what happened. I forgot the ending at Chinatown. I haven't seen Chinatown in 20 years. Dude. At least. More. More than 20 years. Maybe a top five movie ever. I remember, I saw it in a movie theater when I was a little kid. I remember being shocked. Holy shit. Yeah. How old were you? Oh, I was little. Yeah. You should not have been. No, definitely not. But I remember when he got his nose cut by the switchblade. I was like. Crazy. Remember when they sliced Jet? Fuck it. That was Polanski who sliced him. Yeah. Was it? Really? Yeah. It was him. Wow. Yeah. He's hard to beat Nicholson in terms of cool. He was just the coolest. He did some bangers. That's for sure. That and Last Detail and One Flew Over Cuckoo's Nest and Easy Rider and Five Easy Pieces in succession is fucking insane. The ending of One Flew Over Cuckoo's Nest when they have zapped his brain out and you see him sitting there drooling. Isn't that the worst? Brutal. They did that to a lot of people, man. Beautiful fucking ending, but that's also. Dude, that movie fucking. I saw that too young probably, but that just made you. That was like, "Oh, yeah. He's the cool guy. He wants to be the fucking center of attention." He's kind of like a comedian and all these crazy people. It's like he's the center of attention. He's trying to lift their spirits. The scene where she won't let him watch the World Series and he just goes on and he starts. He has the votes, but she won't let him watch because she counts the votes downstairs and he just starts narrating the World Series as if it's happening on TV, but it's not. That's one of the most fucking beautiful scenes in any movie ever. It's also like that world of mental health institutions is so stupid. It's so spooky. Especially back then. People could just decide you were crazy and keep you in a place like that. Totally. Yeah. Also, that was the anti-authority. Every '70s movie was anti-authority and ended with you getting shot in the face or murdered. Network, Bonnie and Clyde. It's always you getting murdered in the end. I wonder how much the CIA had to do with that, the endings of those films. Well, dude, it was hopelessness, right? It was like everything's hopeless. You're going to lose. They're always going to get you. I mean, everyone talks about this dark shit, but it got us some good movies. Who's. Is there a movie where like a sort of a film where the bad guy gets away in that era? The bad guy? I mean, God, probably a lot. No country for old men. I mean, Chinatown is one. He literally takes her away. He takes the girl away, the daughter that he's molested her mother and he's going to molest her. He takes her away. That's how the movie ends. Yeah. Sorry for spoilers if you haven't seen Chinatown. Still worth seeing, even though you know the ending now. What year was that movie? I think '74 or something. '74. '74. Yeah. But it was like. Oh, dude, a lot of movies ended. I mean- So I was seven. I'll give you a big budget one that ended dark. Empire Strikes Back. Han Solo's in Carbonite. The bad guys win. Oh, yeah. Yeah, but they're setting you up first. They're setting you up. But like dark. Yeah, I'm trying to think of that era. Alien. Alien, the bad guy wins. Alien. What's another one, though, that from the '70s were like. No, in Alien, the bad guy doesn't- Oh, like Corporate Evil wins, I guess is what it says. Yeah. Corporate Evil wins in Network, for sure. Network is- Yeah. In the '60s through '80s were the films where the bad guy wins, and it gave me this list of films right here. Oh, Network, I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore? Fucking 10 out of 10 movie. That's like. That's a great movie, man. That's fucking perfect. Oh, The Thing? That's good. Yeah. Invasion of the Body Snatchers? Is this a movie where all the bad guys win? I asked perplexity of films where the bad guys win. Oh, Rosemary's Baby's a good one. From the '60s. Man, I just read Zinnemann, the New York Times guy's book on horror movies. It's fucking great. called Shock Value and he talks about Rosemary's Babe and like all the horror movies of that era it's it's worth a read if you haven't read it but it's uh yeah i guess that movie like that ending too which is like you think the mom's gonna kill she's gonna kill the devil she just gave birth to satan and you think she's gonna kill the fucking baby but instead she's like this is my baby i gotta keep it yeah so so enjoy that pro lifers rosemary's baby there was a guy who was in rosemary's baby that owned the first place that we bought that we're gonna put the mothership at he was a cult leader he was actually an extra in rosemary's baby that was like his one claim to fame yeah he's a very handsome guy he was a a yoga teacher who was a hypnotist also a gay porn star that's a that's a fucking jack of all trades yoga porn fuck yeah there's a documentary about him it's called uh holy hell damn yeah gay porn star and that must have been fucking scary right i mean what the 60s no this was uh i think he was doing gay porn in probably the 70s or the 80s it had to be the i think the movie rosemary's baby i think was in the 70s and so he was by then i think he was out of acting it's probably he probably did porn in the 80s because he was in it was like what year was waco that was the 90s right i'm not sure i think so so by the time waco had rolled around the waco tragedy he was already running a cult and so that's one of the reasons why he moved to austin he had a cult in uh west hollywood and uh the cult awareness network was investigating him because after waco they started cracking down on cults they're like hey this is not ending well this is a problem yeah and so uh this fucking guy moved to austin and changed his name no internet back then right nobody knew anything changed his name and then um started uh this new cult out here and had his followers build him a theater whoa and that theater is called the one world theater i thought you're gonna say the paramount i was like so this one world theater is out uh like western austin and uh it was for sale how big is it it's a big theater uh i mean not a big theater not like thousands i think probably it's seated six five six hundred wow the balcony not that big yeah but yeah good size cool decent but beautiful place maybe even less maybe like four but anyway ron white did it and and he told me he's because when we talked about buying a place he goes you should buy this fucking theater i did it it's amazing i fucking killed there he's telling me about this beautiful theater that was fucking beautiful used to be owned by a cult i thought oh that'd be hilarious i'll buy a place owned by a cult and then uh adam egan after we like signed papers and everything adam egan calls me up he goes hey did you see the documentary on that cult and i'll go oh no they never make documentaries on the cults where it worked out great no and this one's rough so this one it was like years into the cult one guy in the early 2000s leaves and when he leaves he sends a mass email and he says hey this guy's been hypnotizing me and butt fucking me for the past 10 years oh my god and then all these other people like that's his way i'm not gay he tricked me yeah he liked to fuck the straight guys it was like part of his therapy damn he would charge them for it too that's the worst part the documentary's crazy it's like 50 bucks the documentary's crazy that's a weird amount to charge damn it doesn't want to be rude he's butt fucking these guys that's true but um when he confesses that this guy's been doing that to him everybody else says oh my god he's been doing it to me too wow and then it all falls apart that is fucking crazy i mean that is uh and you almost had that theater yeah oh i had it i had i was under contract and everything i had to get out but adam got you out of it no no we got out of it because there it wasn't you know when you uh butt people and charge them 50 dollars uh generally they don't build your buildings to code yeah and so you got to charge comedy tickets at least 52 we got we got uh we got out on a loophole there was an issue damn yeah good for you for getting out of a building though also then why it's not like you're buying epstein's island and redoing it why can't you do a theater really so what's gonna happen with the theater now oh they're doing something with it i don't know somebody else owns it now it's a beautiful place and it's gonna on a great piece of land but it was just like the bad juju in that room was just too much all right yeah i guess the story's rough you don't we were all talking about it like dude we're gonna have to burn sage in this place for like four years just to clean out i mean just think about all these poor kids that like went to take yoga classes and well someone's buying epstein's island someone's buying his penthouse you're getting a discount but you're right they've also his ranch he's got that ranch where there's like bodies missing they think there might be isn't there a search for bodies at the ranch wasn't that something recently but they're going to turn that island into some sort of resort i'm sure it's going to be if you're like at a discount i'm sure if you want to go on vacation with your wife and you're like why is this one so cheaper that's going to be so cheaper the whiskey's heading why have i seen that building before i'm sure it's a nice townhouse but yeah i wouldn't i wouldn't want it yeah if you're once you're in that tax bracket you know that's one of the darkest things in the epstein emails was the sulfuric acid do you know about that they found out that he had i forget how many gallons i think it was something to the in in the neighborhood of 300 gallons of sulfuric acid holy shit yeah that's fucking weird yeah and he ordered the shipment i think after he was indicted if i'm if i'm correct i remember we looked it up and it had to do with like water cleaning yeah just to be plausible yeah i think someone said it had to do with the he also seems so stupid you see those emails of him and everyone's like he was so persuasive and charming and the emails you're like oh my god i'm not going to do that i'm not going to do that i'm not going to do that you seem like a fucking neanderthal the way you talk yeah well i mean the other people i think they all felt protected yeah and he was just so fucking yeah he probably felt untouchable you're you're squeezing people who are this powerful you're like who's going to fucking come for me i remember james patterson wrote that book like trashing before all this shit went down because they were neighbors in florida so he took out like a hit piece on him like way back in the day there's a whole book being like this guy's a piece of shit when was this probably like the 20 teens i mean he had already been arrested for that but it wasn't it wasn't for for statutory whatever but it wasn't it wasn't when it was a massive media story that was the second but they were neighbors he's like i fucking hate this guy i think a lot of it boils down to one lady who was a reporter who chased the story down yeah because i think she was outraged that he got like that sweetheart deal at first yeah fuck that's gonna be like the crazy thing is that's like the story that just keeps going it won't go away and it probably won't for think about you're talking about the story that's about jfk 12 years what what are we gonna know about epstein in 12 years what's really disturbing is how many people went and met him after he had already been arrested yeah after yeah once you know that you gotta not after you gotta not do that went to jail and then they're like let's hang out yeah let me email you so there's a yeah so there's a string of this forever it's fucking dark man and then you gotta think okay we know about that one how many of them are out there right how many of these these fucking secret places are out there right now yeah i've been invited to some weird shit dude like what kind of shit weird shit like what i don't want to say too much i've been invited to these like retreats where like people i don't know feels eyes wide shut and they invite me to say yeah yeah some well not i don't want to say eyes wide shut but very illuminati ish yeah like invited me to go meet with these you know people that are like heads of industry and you know i remember but the question is why do they want you there because you have a platform where you where you can clearly trash these people i think because they probably assumed that they could sweet talk me and do business with me and make it profitable for me and so maybe i'll just like not talk about them perhaps maybe yeah i've avoided every single one of those that's very confident though so new mexico i mean it's sorry they officially launched a uh truth commission to look into what happened at zora ranch it says here a former texas state senator is currently running for office as a state comptroller bought it to make it a christian retreat reclaiming it for jesus that's a perfect cover isn't it someone's getting nailed to a cross reclaiming it for jesus is wild the state's epstein truth commission this new mexico is a truth commission for epstein held its first public meeting in february where members said that they would coordinate with the m new mexico department of justice uh rep andrea romero chairs the commission and its other members are rep okay they haven't found anything yet published this was in march 11th was the last update i could find on it i got invited to go to bohemian grove what's that that's that place that alex jones found out about that people said was bullshit it's some place in northern california where a bunch of elites get together and they they wear robes and they chant and they worship a giant owl god i don't like any of this i don't like any of this yeah yeah i've been invited to some weird shit i've said no to every one of those things i just want to be clear on the record that's one thing about having made a lot of money it's you cannot really tempt me with a lot of money that's good like you know not that i would be at all like i've always made enough money i don't have like crazy extravagant tastes no i'm Men who wear diamonds are fucking weird. It's odd. It's white guys. White guys who wear diamonds? It's very odd. I give black guys a little bit more slack. I guess so. It's all weird. It's like men who wear cologne. Like, what are we doing? It's odd. There's something about it I don't quite trust. I guess if you're European, I give a pass for that one. But there's something about when you start, I think it's probably you get invited into these things, and they want to bring you into the fold. You're like, you know, you're a super wealthy man. They want to be close to you. They want to be, you know. It's very odd. I've managed to keep my head above water and keep moving. You've got a family. You've got a lot of shit. But it's not even just that. You're a busy guy. I am busy. But I wouldn't be interested in the first place. I'm not saying the schedule's keeping you from this. I'm just saying, like. It's just odd that there's these kind of groups out there. I don't need any other shit. I don't want any extracurricular. I play pickup basketball with comics on Sunday, and I'm kind of like, that's all I need. I do the road. I do sets. What else the fuck do I need? I'm very happy with my life. Me too. I have a family. Happy with the family. Everybody's great. I play pool. I do sets. You're good at pool, right? I've heard you're good. I'm really good. Yeah. Yeah. I knew you were good because I remember the first time. One of the first times we hung out, you talked about how shitty Tom Cruise looked in The Color of Money. And I was like, oh, Joe must be good. And I saw you hitting around like he's fucking good. Yeah. It's just you can't pretend that you're really good at pool. I'm terrible. I give away that I remember I did a Friars Club tournament early on, and I got lucky and I won the first one. And I just, for some reason, the balls went in, but I was exposed. It was because the guy I was playing against was like, your form is shit. He's like, I know you're getting lucky. And I was. And I got my ass kicked. Well, someone who's really good, there's like a subtle way they hold the cue and play with the cue. It's like you ever see a movie where a guy's smoking cigarettes and you know that he doesn't really smoke cigarettes? Oh, yeah, me. Yeah. If you're in a movie. I mean, dude, anyone, it's any sport, though. If I see you making shots in basketball and I see your form, it's shit. I know you're. Of course. You're trash. Or guitar playing. Yeah. Like you're watching, like that guy doesn't really know those. Chords. Totally. Like he's just fucking moving his fingers around. Yeah. Pretending he's a wizard. No, you easily. I mean, look, there's a few exceptions always. Sometimes people have a weird ass form and it works. Oh, yeah. But. Definitely. You can usually tell. You know who's the best pool player ever in a movie? Jackie Gleason. That's one of my favorite movies. The Hustler. It's a great movie. Bro. That's, you know what's, we talk about dark endings. Oh, yeah. We just talk about dark ending. The Hustler. HUD also. Every Paul Newman movie. No, but yeah, The Hustler. The Hustler was very dark. Jackie Gleason in the Minnesota Fats, bro. He's phenomenal. He was so fucking, he was talking about a fucking drinker too. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Who do you think wins? Shane or Jackie Gleason one on one? They both die. They both die. The world loses because we lose both of them. They drink each other to death. Dude. I think Shane could probably out drink him though. Shane's an animal. Maybe because it's like. He's a bigger guy too. It's like 60s basketball versus now. I think Steph Curry's taking Bob Cousy. I think that's why I put Shane over Jackie Gleason. But Gleason, those guys were animals. And you know what I read is that Spencer Tracy was such a fucking blackout drunk in the 40s, whatever, that the studio would have to hire people to spy on him at bars and just like help him into a car. So it wasn't a news story because he was just such a known blackout alcoholic. And I was like, what a fucking amazing, what an amazing time. I think the difference also is that Gleason is a hard drinker. He's like hard, hard booze. Whereas Shane is like, his butt light. Shane monitors your drinks too. If you're drinking with Shane, Shane's like, this one's almost. Empty hands. You know, they're like, God damn it. Shane, it's Tuesday. His favorite drink, Jackie Gleason's neat scotch whiskey with no, no ice, no water, no soda. That's a drunk. Yeah. Also known to introduce Frank Sinatra to Jack Daniels, helping it make, make it Sinatra's signature drink capacity, both so that he could drink more scotch per hour than anyone alive. I mean, he was, you could just tell he's drinking in that movie. That movie is like, man, that's one of my favorites. My favorite movies ever refused traditional rehearsals for the honeymooners claiming a photographic memory though. Associates noted that heavy drinking offsets sometimes contributed to forgotten lines or poor creative choices such as disastrous TV flop. You're in the picture. Well, those guys back then were such drunks that like people would just feed them lines and then be like, Oh my God, his performance was so naturalistic. I'm like, yeah, dude, you fed him the line. And then he said it. That's why it fucking felt real. Yeah. His drinking was matched with a massive. Appetite for food and the habit of smoking up to five packs of cigarettes a day. Wow. Five packs doesn't seem, that's not fucking possible. You could do it. Five. Yeah, you could do it. I'm just thinking now, was it, has it always been 20 in a pack? Could have been 10 back then? No, you could do it. You could, you could smoke a hundred cigarettes a day. A hundred a day. Yeah. You just keep smoking. You never stop smoking. I mean, you ever see that interview with him where he's just constantly, he's just chain smoking one to the next, one to the next. A hundred is, five packs is absurd. One pack is bad. So five is fucking. Let's think. Like, let's imagine you woke up at 10 a.m., got a cup of coffee, smoked a cigarette, went out to the golf course, smoking cigarettes all the time you're playing golf. Yeah. Like he was, he was like a baby, like a big, like a, not a baby, like a happy child, like a grown up, wealthy, happy child that just did whatever the fuck he wanted to and just lived his life. Like it had no concern whatsoever for his health, no concern for anything else. Other than having fun. What did, what did Gleason make it to? Uh, six packs a day during the height of his career. Wow. How, how old was he when he died? I don't think he was very old. I think he was in his seventies, early seventies. 71. 71? You know, I've been really, uh, I really love Alan Watts. I love listening to Alan Watts speeches. He's just like, there's something about his accent and his, his philosophy with his accent. He was just such a great orator. And he. You know, he's taught, he has these such wise words to say about life. And he wrote a great book about the age of anxiety in 1952. Wow. In 1952, he was talking about. I wonder if it has anything to do with the six packs of cigarettes you're smoking. There's a little, that was the problem with him. This wasn't Jack Gleason. This is Alan Watts. No, no, I know, but I mean, I'm talking about that generation of people that just fucking live like that. But Alan Watts as well. That's, that's the thing. Like he's, he's writing and, and giving these speeches and they're so brilliant and beautiful and they resonate with you. He's so hard. And then you find out, oh, he died. He was 58. Died of, died of heart disease. He was smoking constantly, drinking. He was a fucking terrible alcoholic. He'd been married three times. He had seven kids with three different wives. Like his life was a mess. Doesn't stop you from being brilliant. I mean, how many, how many friends, you know, who are the most toxic relationships you've ever seen? And then you ask them something and they give you the most profound advice. Oh yeah. All the time. Just cause you can still say, I mean, fucking Thomas Jefferson was preaching about how we shouldn't have. Slaves, wall impregnating slaves. Yeah. Yeah. It's easy to not look at your own paper and then speak with, you know, intellect on issues that, you know, you want to read some dark that's over there. Uh, there's a book called the Zorg that's a Darth car wrote. So Darth car is a guy who wrote, um, uh, cobalt red. It was all about the cobalt mining in the Congo. It's like an expose. It's, it's a, it's really dark. That's really dark. It's all bad. And he filmed it and explained it and showed it to us. Everything that's good for us has got a horrible origin. Basically everything we enjoy, but the Zorg is crazy. The Zorg is the ship that essentially ended the transatlantic slave trade because the slave trade apparently was how the insurance industry came about because they were wanted to ensure their slaves as property. And then if a bunch of them die, they wanted to get compensated. So they would, they would, you know, buy a policy on their slave ship. And so this one boat lost like half of its slaves and the, just the horrific conditions because they went to trial for the insurance claim and because they had to throw women and children off the boat because they ran out of water because they miss Cuba and they were circling around. It is the darkest or Jamaica. It is the darkest. It is so awful. And you got to realize like that's only 200 years ago. Yeah. 200 fucking years ago, 200 fucking years ago, this was going on. I mean, you think about how slavery was not that long ago. It's pretty crazy. Well, it's not even not that long ago. It's happening right now in the world. Right, right. But that kind of, the Atlantic slave trade where they, they, they had people 16 inches per body on this boat. That's how stacked the boat was. And they have a diagram of these bodies, like how they made them lie down because that was the best way to conserve space. And they had them lie down on the ground. Shackled 16 inches per body. And I'm pissed with Delta Comfort. It's fucked up. It's a fucked up time. No, it's a, that's fucking awful. I think. Yeah. It's dark. It's as dark as the Roy DeMeo shit. Yeah. Yeah. When you look too closely at the ingredients of the country, it's like looking too closely. It's the ingredients of humans. That's the problem. Humans, when they're allowed to be awful, they, they'll do it. They'll do it. Yeah. Especially if they can get away with it. They'll do it. Yeah, man. The cobalt shit's nuts. Yeah. And that's our cell phone battery. Uh-huh. That's crazy. Cell phone, electric cars, most electronics. So there's, I mean, look, there's no good, like gas, cobalt, there's no good outcome for your car really, right? Oil. It's, it's, there's, there's going to be a shady way you're getting any of this, right? Oil's probably the best, honestly. Isn't that crazy that that's where we're at? Yeah. Well, it's also probably the best. I mean, even though, uh, the, the emissions aren't good, you know what's really bad? Breakdust. brake dust is really bad too why is that electric cars are heavier and electric cars give out more brake dust because the like that shit that you wash if you wash your car and the shit that's on the wheels that stuff gets in your lungs like that stuff is all over cities like when you're driving if you're in New York City and you're like beep beep bumper bumper everyone's hitting the brakes that's all brake dust all that stuff goes in the air so it's like the air in New York is hilarious you go to a place that's like I love I'll die in New York I adore New York to death but like you go to like Vancouver and you're like why is the air so nice here it's just crazy you walk around New York and you're just like why do I smell garbage every and I will fight for New York to the death it's my favorite place in the world but like yeah it's crazy well it's a trade off you want to stack all those people together like that you're going to get exhaust fumes brake dust rats garbage I had a rat in my fucking home last year on a high floor it's a very upsetting thing electric cars make significantly less brake dust okay but hold on regenerative braking is only Tesla's though no it's not yours does it yeah but most of them aren't standard right you have to turn that on like a regenerative braking on Tesla's is like standard it's like turning the air conditioning on though it's pretty easy go with some of those self-driving cars some of them are I was in Fiona Colley's car you know Fiona in Nashville and she's got like a self-driving car it's unbelievable yeah mine does that the technology my Tesla drives itself I can like when I'm leaving the club I press a button something scary I saw last night I don't mean scary is not the right word but it is a guy was showing on Twitter that he could upload his own self-driving model or whatever you know what? what does that mean? for instance you know how you could have your own LMM on your own computer and talk to your own agent if you will and it's separate from being online and it's not taking up all the resources he was saying how he I don't know if he downloaded it from GitHub or where he got it from but he was in control of his own self-driving fucking model so wait I don't understand how that works he owns the car I guess you know and updated he's hacking the software so he hacked into what kind of electric car was it? so he hacked into his Tesla yeah he was showing the video he didn't show the video of how he did everything but he was showing the video of the car so what is him hacking into it so he can just do whatever he wants no well I mean he could drive his wife off a cliff is what he could do so I guess if you don't know we're going to get some good Columbo episodes if they bring that shit back not all Teslas have it and it's a software that was a good Columbo thank you it's a software subscription you have to pay for and his response was like well I don't have to pay for it anymore because now I own it is Robert Blake dead? I don't think so Beretta? I don't think he's dead man he was a he's a piece of shit huh? there was a restaurant isn't it crazy that he's in the movie in cold blood he died in 23 oh he died? alright good there was a restaurant that was down the street from a place where I used to live that I used to go to was where he allegedly whacked his wife remember that whole story? he claimed that some guy in a hoodie came over I forget the story and he plays the murderer in cold blood in cold blood yeah yeah he's a piece of shit wasn't who did that movie? that was a weird movie I forgot but he had like white makeup on stuff he looked like really creepy didn't he? I think he was a dumb one too there was a guy I'm confusing that with another movie no that was a Capote book in cold blood that was a fucking amazing book it sucked his son is staging a murder mystery at the same restaurant where the Vitello's no no this is a real heat check dude no no no no no no in cold blood actor Robert Blake was accused of shooting his wife Bonnie Lee Blakely to death in the parking lot of Vitello's Italian restaurant studio city in 2001 now his son is staging a fictional murder mystery in the same eatery that's it's a lot like OJ's if I did it it's a real heat check that's crazy LA's fucking weird dude that's crazy well 150 bucks you gotta do what you gotta do you don't have to do that I guess no you don't that's pretty dark he was he was acquitted in the murder but found liable in the civil case also like OJ the daughter of both Blake and Bakely first took her objections public Monday she's going against her brother denouncing the production on social media and pleading with followers please help me shut down this show that is crazy there was an obsession with true crime to a point now where it was like come on guys the ladies love it they love it yeah I will say I like forensic files because there's closure and the unsolved mysteries ones that's where I'm like what are we doing I think ladies want to know how murderous men think so that they can avoid them I think that's the like what what's going on like things on like the Night Stalker like Richard Ramirez like that documentary exactly he was a scary one very scary that's very popular with the ladies so it shows guys don't we're not watching like Gilmore Girls we're not like we want to know how women think you know but women but we're a threat so I get why they watch it I mean women are upset and women I'll date girls who just like go to sleep right after watching it's unbelievable yeah I don't understand how they do that the Ramirez he was a scary fucker who was the guy that was on the dating game forgot his name it's like the video of him smiling oh dude he looks like such a fucking psycho but he had them all won over on that show he would charmed him Rodney Alcala that's right is that him in jail look at him on trial look at his hair that's crazy oof Jesus Christ looks like Weird Al in that photo 2010 he was sentenced so when did he get arrested what is the story behind dating game oh okay dating what's the title of it dating game killer sentenced for 1970s murder in 2017 2013 he got sentenced convicted California serial killer Ronnie Alcala contested on the dating game television show more than 30 years ago was sentenced to 25 years to life in prison on Monday for murdering two New York women in the 1970s was this additional yeah already on death row in California for killing four women so many people and a 12 year old girl in that state was extradited to New York so this was when he was already in jail and he was 69 God these fuckers get away with it forever that's a crazy ad to have in the middle of this yeah what the fuck is that ad it's crazy Jesus Christ they're selling a shirt that says problem solved that has blood splattered all over it it's not even obvious what it is it's his line it's not obvious no I mean like what are they is it even selling that it could be anything click on it I don't want to click on it I don't ever click on these ads click on it god damn it Halloween but make it your style yeah but you're not supposed to be a real murderer for Halloween you're supposed to be like the Joker or something fun fuck you're not supposed to go as Rodney Alcala who's buying shirts that have splatter all over them what kind of an outfit are you wearing I don't like some of these Halloween costumes freak me the fuck out dude I stay the fuck in on Halloween I like it when girls use it as an opportunity to be a hoe of course a slutty nurse they're playing to the home crowd right here we love it but when you're doing weird shit when dudes start eating you especially in New York dude there's people doing weird shit and you're like same feeling I get when I see a dude with a backpack at the movie theater I'm like oh come on dude you know you're making this uneasy right they should have a metal scanner they absolutely should I'm out for more security but at the same time I want to relax in a movie I like going to the theater yeah the mask thing is nuts man because so many people could just wear masks now it used to be if someone wore a mask and they walked into a bank it was crazy but now you can't even question them because it might be a COVID issue how many people are robbing banks these days that must be like I wonder I wonder because it's like that feels like hard to do that feels like the 80s or like a small town and you know especially with like flock cameras and all that shit it feels so hard to do now how many bank robberies are there per year let's guess in the United States I'm going to guess like 20 that might be crazy in the whole country is that crazy like a real robbery I'm going to say 200 that would be probably closer credit unions and shit I don't know how people get away well yeah I'm talking in person we're not saying all the time I'm talking in person with a gun I'm not talking like some sort of weird wire fraud thing what about if they show up with a letter that says I have a bomb is that okay does that count yeah we'll count it that counts okay so maybe it's higher I'll go 50 okay I'm saying 200 but I think you're right probably I'm sticking with 200 I still think you're right I think there's a lot of like small credit unions and weird places and weird way up way up a thousand yeah it's still higher 2,000 I mean it's like 1,300 wow I'm fucking way off whoa I even attempted bank robberies per year yeah 1,362 bank violations including 1,263 robberies but it's way down like you watch a movie like Point Break now and you're like that's like a period piece that's not 92 there's almost 10,000 yeah it is a fucking nutty thing to have like a building that has all the money in it well it's becoming less and less right everything's becoming more and more digital think about how muggings must be down just from people not carrying cash yeah people just want your phone so they get your bitcoin wallet yeah I mean god it's or they do the one where they kind of they're able to scan your card somehow or something right yeah they can your RFID chip it's all digital theft now well they also can get you the gas station you know they put those those things or it's just people like getting close I had a guy steal three years of Facebook money from me. - Really? - Yeah. How'd they do that? He was a social media manager. I didn't realize he stole my fucking money. I wasn't paying it. I'm managing so many things. He stole from other comics, too. He stole from Norman, Fortune, Josh Wolf. Oh, you had him managing your stuff? Yeah, because I don't want to deal with that shit. But he, yeah, but he was just, he put it directly into his account. And they made it on Facebook where it's really hard to get it back in your name. You need to go through all these procedures. I wouldn't have gotten it back if I didn't know a guy at Facebook. I have a friend who used to work there. How did you know the guy? Norman was like, you should use this guy. I'm like, thanks, Mark. Didn't fucking apologize, by the way. Mark got out of it, and I was like, this guy's weird. Mark's like, oh, yeah, that guy's a piece of shit. I was like, oh, thanks. Yeah, all those people are weird. He took from a lot of comics. Well, if they think comics are not paying attention, it makes sense. We're not. I'm thinking of the next joke. I'm not thinking about my fucking money. Especially Facebook money. How much money are you even talking about? It's not crazy, but it's. It's enough. Three years ends up being substantial. Yeah, it's real money. It's real theft. Did the guy get in trouble? No? Nothing? I mean, I'll do something. Probably doing Theo's stuff right now. Someone did it to Theo, too. I messaged Theo. I was like, is this. And he goes, I messaged Theo. I was like, this guy steal from you? And Theo goes, was he black? And I was like, no. And he's like, nah, it wasn't him. Yeah, he just went through something. Yeah. There's a lot of those guys like that. Because you have to give up your account to them in order for them to run it. I'm not going to say it's worth it, but it's almost worth it just not having to deal with shit. Almost worth it. I just want to live a normal life and go to the store and get coffee and think of jokes. And do shit. There should be an AI that does that for you, which makes more sense. Because the problem with a person doing it is that person could also send DMs on your behalf. Oh, dude. I mean, look at Dane Cook. His own fucking brother took from him, right? Yes. I mean, anyone could do it. Not only did his brother took from him, he never recovered the money. And his brother went on a trip across the country. They don't know what he did. They think his brother might have stored the. I think he just did a documentary on his brother. Yeah. Looks good. Here's the first AI agent mishap. Meta user says Muse AI gave out his address, agreed to pick up. He never approved. Muse AI agent sold his keyboard on Facebook Marketplace at a low ball price, shared his address with the buyer, and set up a late night pickup all without his approval. He's trying to get him killed. It's fucking weird. Yeah. No, I mean, there's too much to think about. There's too much to manage. I can't deal with that. I can't deal with all this shit. Yeah. It's weird. It stresses me out. I mean, you must have a million things that you give to other people to do, right? I try not to think about much. True. Because there's too much to think about. So I just focus on doing the podcast, doing comedy shows. That's what success is. You try to get away. I mean, someone like you, you're like, I just want to show up and work on this shit. I think the more you micromanage that stuff, the more it fucks with your head, too. It becomes a part of your focus, and it just steals from all your other focus. Totally. Yeah. No, I want to think about, that to me is like luxury. It's like less stuff I have to worry about, and I just want to- 100%. I want to just live life and enjoy life. Word. All right, dude. Netflix. New special. Yeah, Sam Morrell. Incorrect. It's awesome. It's good. I have not watched it yet, but I've heard great stuff. Give it a watch. You're a funny motherfucker. I'm sure it's awesome. It's my best. I'll say it's either my best or my second best, I'll say. It's hard to top that YouTube one I did in 2020. I was so fucking hungry and angry at the world, but this one, it's really good. I took a little longer with this one, and I shot it in the Tampa Theater. Gorgeous theater. Three shows, ton of fun. Oh, that's nice. I threw on a nice blazer. Come on, guys. Three shows is a smart move. It's a move. I got to do at least three. Yeah, you get- Three or four. You get loosened up. Yeah, and the crowd was so- Tampa crowds are fucking great, man. Tampa's awesome. That theater's one of the most gorgeous theaters, and I got in right before they renovated it, so I was like, I got all the kinks and the dirt. It's such a fun place to tape. A lot of swingers in Tampa. Yeah, dude. They're wild. Hopefully my girlfriend stopped listening. Yeah. What? Swingers? What? A whole group of swingers came to one of my shows once, and they were telling me, and they all looked like nobody you wanted to swing with, of course. Of course. But it was just very- It's like a nude beach. You're like, tits, and then you're like, oh, tits. It's just very odd. Not good. That they were all grouped up. And then you said the same thing. It's very odd. They were all grouped in this one place. Yeah. I mean, it's just a place. I was like, I've never done a special in Florida or anything, so I was like, let me just mix it up. And Tampa's always been good to me. I played a club there coming up called SideSplitters. It always treated me really well. And I was like, let me do it. Also, you know when you're touring and you clock a theater, you're like, I really like this theater. Yeah. There were two others that I clocked that I was like, I'm going to come. One is the Bijou in Knoxville, and the other is the Moore in Seattle. There are two theaters. I just like, these are beautiful. The vibe is right. You know what I thought about doing? Fox in Detroit. Ooh, that's a really nice one. Oh, that's a good one. That's an old school one, too. That place, they have one of their columns that is replaced, and the one that was there before is yellow from cigarette smoke. Yes. That's how old it is. Detroit's great, too. I mean, it's a great comedy city. It's like a real city. It's a real city. Yeah. It's gritty. Midwest is great for, I always shout out the Omaha Funny Bone. That's where I always work out, and I try to build back up. Colleen. Oh, really? I love that club. They say Omaha is where they test a new fast food item. So, like, if Taco Bell or McDonald's, like, we're going to try a new thing because it's so representative of America. So, I'm like, well, by that logic, it should be great to test new jokes. Yeah. So, I love Omaha Funny Bone. Or, like, yeah, right now I'm on tour, and I'm just, like, trying clubs, and I'm building back. It's such a miserable process, but you're building back up, and you go to the places you always want to go, like Madison or, like, Cleveland Hilarities is great. All these clubs are such great clubs. So, you build back up, and it's a humbling but fun process, you know? We're lucky as fuck, dude. We're very lucky. We're lucky we get to do this. It's the funnest job. I feel lucky, man. For sure. I'm glad you do because you're very appreciative of it. It's very apparent. Sorry, my Columbus pride won't let you take that away from us. Oh, you're from Columbus as well? I'm going there. I'm going there. Oh, is that where they do the test? I'm going there. Most of the test stuff? Early next year, I'm hitting the Funny Bone. I love that club, too. Another great place. I love Columbus. It's great, too. Columbus is awesome. Let's wrap it up. Sweet. Good to see you, brother. Great to see you. How long are you in town for? I leave tomorrow afternoon. Okay. Are you doing Kill Tony tonight? I'm not. I'm not. Okay. I'm fucking burnt. I hear you. All right. Website, all that jazz. People won't find you? Yeah, just my name, Sam. Okay. Bye, everybody. It's football season. Uber Eats. So, order a six-inch turkey, tuna, or meatball sub from Subway, and you'll get one free. Order now for buy one, get one, select six-inch subs. Only on Uber Eats. See app for details.