24/02/2026

This BBC podcast is supported by ads outside the UK. This is not the future we were promised. Like hell that out for a tagline for the show. From the BBC, this is the interface, the show that explores how tech is rewiring your week and your world. This isn't about quarterly earnings or about tech reviews. It's about what technology is actually doing to your work and your politics, your everyday life. And all the bizarre ways people are using the internet. Listen on BBC.com or wherever you get your podcasts. You're listening to Tuesday's episode of The Arches from BBC Radio 4. I just popped in to see Jill and she mentioned you're the new chair David. Oh, the book is to show. Yeah, I was rather chuffed. I don't want to have the committee members actually. Do you? In fact, one was at the Pony Club indoor show jumping at the weekend. How'd you get on, Lillian? The stables did very well and Kira had to go at the clear round too. It's good to hear. Lillian, as soon as you're here, can I pick your brains about the show? Well, it attracts your questions. I can tell you that much. Yeah, Ruth, reminding me that some of the classes are horse of the year qualifies. We see some top competition. Interesting. The thing is, I want a new attraction this year. Give it new energy. You know? Sure, why not? Exactly. So, might the stables be interested in coming up with some volunteers and an idea or two? I mean, publicity wise, it would be a win-win for you. I'm not sure I thought. Oh, sorry. It looks like you started carving. I'll find you later. I don't think I'll have time, David. There's a lot to catch up on. See you later. Easy now. Easy. Ugh. Sorry to drop rain when you're laughing your lunch, but I need a moan. Sit down then. You want a cup of? No, it's hot. Oh. I had a nightmare in the day yesterday, try, so. Helen's very distracted for some reason and you know we're short-staffed at the moment. I knew she was cloudy, wouldn't it come back? Yeah, more's the pity. Because yesterday I got lumbered with an amine lumbered with curster. Really? And she got enough to do with the rewolder. Oh, let's hope so, Chelsea. Because I do not want to remodel your game. My bad. Worst. How come? A retention to detail was wonderful. Yes. The banneried does have to be at 67 degrees. And yes, that is for exactly 20 minutes. I mean, why does she think it's written on huge soles on the dairy board? She's been trained though. Oh, she's a cub. It was hopeless. A quarter ringing someone when her phone should have been safely in a locker room. Did you get it faster than her? I am too, Jess. Oh, and how'd she take it? Well, she couldn't wait to get out of the place after a shift. So I'm pretty sure we're of the same opinion. Dairy work is not the curster. Oh, poor curster. I'm sure she's very good at whatever it is she does at the pre-wilding. But the dairy needs very special skills. Well, you'd be there good to her, you have me. Very true. Now, you didn't want to have a go, Chelsea. Oh, it's good pie. Better than cafe work. Oh, Chelsea's got other iron in the fire. Oh, Brad. When the work was unilectious. I suppose not. Oh, well, thought I'd ask. I don't know what Helen will do if we don't get anyone. Pat's asleep on her feet and it'd be such a shame if we can't make this new contract work for his long term. Can't get the staff, right? You really can't try, so. Anyway, what I ended up getting the fire then, Chelsea? What's this about a horse boat? It's at the stable. It's going to be my salon, aren't you, Suez? Is he bleeding? Yeah, yeah. But, they wore that out. Sorry. I've had a minute to read your messages in the chat. It's been a few years. What data app so as you can be truly mobile? It's going to be brilliant. You'll have to come to the stables and see it when it's done. Oh, salon, eh? Yeah. I think so, you say. Yeah. I look forward to seeing it. I'm having me out, you know. Me at all. Oh. Oh, no. Look at the time I'm at biscuit, I was in the shop. I'll let myself out. Have a good afternoon. And all the best with the horse, that's. Mmm. See you later. Sorry. We need to get going, because I'm at the ball this afternoon. Alright. See how bad this rest is before we buy the horse. There's lots of scrubbing, too. Still stinks of horse poo. Your clients won't like that. And they will like it. I was covered in for a couple of hours, but then I'm nearly back at better. I got all the cleaning stuff ready, so come on then, people. Let's party! [laughs] Personally, I find this brand a little strong. Oh, well, I've made the right choice then. Ruth and I need a strong dose of caffeine to keep us away from carving. Can you get paid, poor Josh, to do the night chief's day, David? Six pounds, fifty plays. Well, not paid, because she's got rosier course, but Josh. I'm afraid Josh is too busy getting himself a farming job away. Oh, it isn't real, I ease. He's not giving up the egg sure, though. He's getting a manager in, which will take a while, I expect, but after that. Oh, you miss him, I'm sure. Oh, we will, Susan. It's all been quite tricky. Granted, he's been away before, but this is something he wants to do career-wise, you know, so, suppose it does make sense. Doesn't say no, there's any stopping him. Anyway, the many decided to manage it, he'll be off. Well, I hope he has better look finding someone than we've had at the day, right? Lily and. Oh, well, Susan, just here for my magazine. David. Lily and you've just saved me a visit to the stables. Have I? Yeah, when you mentioned the equestrian angle earlier, it got me thinking. A big push in that direction would really strengthen the bortches to show, particularly with your backing. How about a new competition of some variety that draw people in? A must-sign. We loved that farrier competition last year at the Felphysham show. Paul didn't quite a crowd, especially the young ones. That's right, it did. Now, we've never had one of those. Well, they're tremendous fans. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's the perfect big idea. And your clients would love it, Lily. Look, why don't we get the stables involved? It'd really put you on the map. We are already on the map, thank you, David. Sorry, but I'm going to take a wild guess. Have you, Pajan, been speaking to Linda? Why? Because I recognise the Linda Snell, M-O. Mate-O. What do you mean? Well, let's see. Big idea. Benefits to you. My request from Linda's nobling volunteers, believe it or not. Oh, she's Rowie Tyve. Oh, yeah. Just how silly, did you think I am? Oh, sorry, but. It's the delegate stage next, isn't it, Lily? Indeed. Only you won't be delegating anything to me, David Archer. But it's a great idea. I will be darling, but it's nothing to do with me. I'm going to have to get back to the carving. But look, if you change your mind. Under snowballs, chance. Really? Lucky escape, Lily. I must think I was born yesterday. As my magazine arrives, isn't it? Oh, yes, I'll get it here for you. Oh, I meant to say. Thanks for sorting out her, Chelsea. With the horsebox salon thingy. She's really excited about doing it up. There you are. The horsebox, the one at the stable. I think so. We really have to get rid of it, darling. Total rust-bucket. Such an eyesaw. Oh, I'm not sure she's moving it. Sorry. I got the impression she'll be working on it where it is. Did you? Well, that doesn't sound right. No, I think I need a quick word with that. Lily, I need your magazine. Oh, well. There's no smell as I thought. There's rust. A few patches, I have nothing to treat. Oh, that's good. And we'll need insulating before we start boarding it. Yeah, yeah, I don't want my clients freezing. You want the cool for the summer and all? No, I'm just a hound. Oh. She says there's a tap in the corner somewhere. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I can see it. We'll need to blast it a bit before we start scrubbing Chelsea. All right. Electric's in plum and that's the priority. And fitting it out so all the furniture's all secure when you're driving. This refurb, everything adds up, don't it? It's all doable, Chelsea. But it will cost a bit, obviously. The electric is going to be cheap. I'm pretty sure Joyce mentioned electrician from mixed days on the music festivals. He knows loads of useful people. Well, I last joy, but I need to work out the money cycle because everyone's still wants to pay in if you know if it is meat's roots. They'll want paying up front toig back. What? What are they? I'm out lately. Oh, that's annoying. What's the little thing he's doing? Maybe. Take the host, Chelsea. Where are you going? I've got an idea. I don't belong, Mum. We need your air. Oh, where is he? Come on. Who's home? Are you here? The store room, Tracy. Ah, ha. You're scyping out the back, are you? No, I'm not scyping. Thank you. Looking for the cheesy snack. I love them. Well, I can't find them, so you're out in look. I've been thinking about your staff in Corp. I'm sure they were on the back, Chelsea. You need someone reliable who's good with detail. I'm enthusiastic, a fast learner. Well, I'll never get anyone that good at what you can. That's what I'm telling you. This person ticks all those boxes, and she's easy to get on with. But do you know someone, then? Yes. Well, who is he then? Do I know them? Oh, you know them. Really, really well. I've already tried, Clara. No, not her. Come on, Susan. It's not obvious. Who is the perfect person to work alongside you in the darey? But your trusty lieutenant, your cheery sidekick, I've no idea. Who? Me? You? Yes. I can fit it around my shifts at the pub, and you know yourself. I've done every job going, so I'm bound to pick up darey work pretty quick. What do you think? I didn't know you wanted another job. Well, it's an extra job, isn't it? It's a very cold environment to work in, try say. Not everyone likes it. It can't be worse than the chicken factory. It was freezing in there. The best thing is the extra cash can help Chelsea pay for our horsebox. So, okay, it would only be temporary, but it'll help you out. Possibly. I were about to moron. I don't know what to say. Susan, please. Don't think I'll be lowering standards or overlooking any slacking just because you're family. Is that, I guess? It's a let's see what Helen sees. And are putting a good word. Oh, thank you. No, you keep missing a bit. No, I'm not. The side edge there. Where? What do you mean? Down the side there. Show me. Here. Right here. You mean right there? Chaser. I'm dripping. I can't even believe you felt for it. Oh, yeah. What's on earth? A lillian. Turn that hose up immediately. Who's just having a wheel out? This kind of behaviour is wholly inappropriate at a working stable. The horse is a new owner. We're really, really sorry. It's unprofessional and reckless. We'll see that, bud. And then tonight it was, Chaser. We should have been more sensible because there's probably like kids and parents and owners nearby. And we're honest. It will happen again. No, no, it won't because this vehicle, which I understand you now own, I want it off the yard. Bronton. No, please, Lily. I don't want to discuss it. So kindly make the arrangements. All right, I want it gone. No, no, no, no, Chaser. There's nothing I can do. I can't believe it. How did it go this wrong, this fast? Oh! [Music] This is not the future we were promised. Black hell that out for a tagline for the show. Listen on BBC.com or wherever you get your podcasts.