282: 1st Day on Earth! Ft. Direct_Caterpillar77

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This episode is brought to you by Credit Karma. When it comes to your money, Credit Karma keeps you ahead of the game. You can count on Credit Karma to keep up with your financial needs as they evolve. They'll help you monitor your progress and give personalized recommendations so you can make strides towards your goals and find your way to money. Make sure you're on the right track, no matter where you are on your financial journey. Intuit Credit Karma, karma you can count on. How's your day been? Fine, yeah. How you doing, big dog? Good. Your hair and makeup looks really, really nice today. Thank you. Your makeup looks great. I love your earrings. We want to show the people that you wear earrings. Stare down the cam. Mog. Have you heard of mogging? I feel like I've heard it from you. You should mog that camera. What is it exactly? Mog. The definition of mog, to outclass, outshine, or look physically superior to someone else. That's just not how it sounds. I'm thinking like a frog, a toad, I don't know. It's coming from like an alpha male group, but I think people have like kind of internet twisted it to make it a more positive, funny thing. And like, so I saw there's this one person named Clavicular who's, I know nothing about him. Probably problematic. I don't want to know. But I saw a picture of someone sharing a meme where they're like, Clavicular looks like Young Sheldon. And then the actor that plays Young Sheldon responded back and goes, I mogged him here. And I'm like, mog? Okay. I'm feeling like I'm in the know right now. Mm-hmm. So you're teaching me something. Yeah. So if you could just mog that camera to show off your earrings, that would be great. Thank you. Don't look at my broken nail, please. You're fine. They can't see your nails. That's not very moggy. No. But those earrings we got when we were in Mallorca and Lauren was hesitating. I was like, no, they're literally perfect for your eyes. And now you keep wearing them. And I'm like, yes. Well, so I go through these like jewelry phases where I think I just like lose, the rest of them or I'll like put them somewhere and I misplace them. And then I just like only wear one pair of earrings. I'm like that with clothes. A few months until I misplace these and then I'll find something else. And then, yeah. That's the ADHD in us. Is it? Because I go through that with clothes. I only wear the same thing for like two weeks. And then once I have to wash it, it's gone. Don't know where it is. No, I will like with comfy clothes, like I will wear them until I stain them. And I'm like, I'm like, I need to wash them because I need to wear it. Like I get, like, I need to wash them because I need to wear it. I need to wash them because I need to wear it. I'm like really obsessed with like comfy clothes. And I'm like, these can't be replaced that like these ones are perfect. And then I stain them and then I move on. I'm big into a sleep t-shirt. Like I value my sleep t-shirts more than any other piece of clothing I have because I just cherish them so much. And Justin finally understood it the other day. We got invited thanks to our Spotify fam to go to see Shaboosie. What's Shaboosie? Shaboosie is a music artist. Okay. He just put out a new country album. Okay. And it's unreal. Super good. You guys should all listen. But they were giving away t-shirts and Justin's like, why don't you get it in a size you can actually wear in public? And I'm like, no, no, no. 2X baby. 2XL. So I can wear it as a sleep tee because I just, I love them. Yeah. And he's like, oh, you care about sleep t-shirts more than anything. And I'm like, yeah. It's a big deal. Yeah. Here we are eight years later. It finally, you know, clicked in. I'm like, yes. Oh my gosh. I, one of our friends got me such a nice gift. Basically it's a brand, a brand of sweats that's like made for traveling and I, um, it's really, it's oversized in itself. And so she got me a medium and I'm like, it is oversized, but I still want a large, but I still am like, I'm like, I need it to be triple XL. Like I'm just like need it. I need to like make a house from it. Whenever I put the hood on. I want it to hang off me. I want to literally. Do not touch my hips. In the airplane. Get off me. I want to create. A fort with it. Yeah. That's how I am too. Shall we get into today's stories? I really love that catch up with you. I hope everyone out there is doing well. I hope you are ready to embark on a nice commute, road trip, time at the gym, maybe a cleaning spree, whatever it is. Happy you're here with us as we get into today's stories. Yes. Theme. Not firing on all cylinders. Me neither. But we've got wine. It is chilled. Do you like it? I love it. Okay, good. Thank you for getting this, which we are going to need lay patience today because the theme is first day on earth. Okay. These are just stories full of people that you kind of wonder what they've been up to the past 20, 30, 40 years of their life. Like, how did you make it this far? Like my dad loves to say to me when I, when I try to help him do stuff, he's like, Morgan, I'm going to do this. Morgan, what do you think I've been doing for the last 65 years? I go, truly, I don't know. I don't know how you've made it this far because you need my help. Jerry is like the little, um, the grandma in Mulan that like closes her eyes and like has the cricket and walks through and like everything is like destroyed in his path, but he stays perfectly fine. That is my dad. He is just chaos, which we're going to have dad back on a show soon. I know I've been hearing for calls for him. Yeah, that would be fun. Yeah. But he does have his own show guys. Father knows something. You can go see dad every week. Yeah. But these people, they're just, it's chaos. It is confusion. It is first day on earth. Let's dive in. Let's do it. Story number one for us here coming from r slash relationship advice titled feeling shocked and confused after I saw my girl. I was like, Oh my God, I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to How do I navigate? Wait, how old is this person? My girlfriend, 21 female and I 22 male have been officially dating for less than a week, but we've seen each other for about two months. Things have been really good and we've gone on nice dates. We're taking things slow physically, no sex yet. And we've just been getting to know each other. One thing I never really noticed until recently was how much makeup I had on. I'm going to die. I'm going to Or maybe she was just very good at applying it. And genuinely, I couldn't tell her makeup always looked really natural. So I never gave it much thought. If I really paid attention, I might've seen a little skin texture, but nothing that stood out. The other night we were at a party and both of us got tipsy. We ended up in a bedroom, the lights were off and we started making out pretty heavily. It was hot, sweaty, and her face was kind of smushed up against my chest. I wasn't wearing a lot of makeup. I didn't have a lot of makeup on. I didn't have a lot fell asleep like that. I woke up before she did. And that's when I noticed most of her makeup had rubbed off during the night. And I saw her bare skin for the first time. She had really inflamed red areas on her cheeks and chin breakouts on her forehead. It looked painful, like cystic acne. It shocked me because she looked so different from what I was used to. It was one of those moments where a part of me, if I'm being brutally honest, felt kind of deceived, which is harsh, I know. It was more shock than actual twinge of feeling turned off by how she looked. But it really did feel like I was seeing a completely different person. I started wondering if she thought I was too clueless to ever notice, or if she just hoped I wouldn't care. When she woke up, I think she realized what had happened. She looked embarrassed and went straight to the bathroom and stayed there for a while. I told her, it was okay, that she didn't have to hide, and that her skin didn't matter to me. I said what I thought was the decent thing to say. But now, I'm questioning if I actually meant it deep down. Because truthfully, I haven't been able to stop thinking about how different she looked. I haven't ghosted her or anything, but I've definitely been keeping busy. I don't know what to say to her. She's picked up on it and is clearly anxious over text. But I still don't know without either lying or hurting her feelings. The whole things made me wonder if I rushed into this too quickly. She wanted some type of commitment and I liked her enough to do that. Maybe I should have pushed back gently and we should have spent more time dating casually, getting to know each other fully before making it official. I didn't expect to feel this way, but now that I do, I don't know what the right next step is. I mean, if you can't handle that, like, then you need to see yourself out because she deserves way more than that. I know some people might read this and instantly call me shallow. I've already run that accusation through my own head, but here's where I'm genuinely trying to understand the line. To me, there's a difference between someone wanting to look their best to feel confident and put together and someone consistently presenting a version of themselves that's so curated it creates a false baseline of what they actually look like. That distinction matters. Recalling some memories, I can tell now she wore full face makeup even for a casual coffee run. I've dated someone with skin issues before, but it didn't change how attracted I was to her. I fully understand that she doesn't owe me full vulnerability, especially not early on, but do I need to agree with the idea that her use of so much makeup was also about presenting a curated false version of herself and not just wanting to look her best? What if her idea of makeup is really to change her whole face? I'm not claiming to be the victim here, but I also can't say she's entirely without responsibility in all of this. She knew her natural skin might significantly affect how I saw her, and yet she allowed me to think this is what she looked like, so I am also a little miffed at her. I don't know if I want to break up with her. She's a good person, but if I continue dating her, I'd want to force an honest conversation with her. What was the theme of this episode again? First day on earth. Yeah. You know, what do you think? What are your thoughts? I had so many memes and, like, audios and, like, things popping in my head as I was reading this. One, the quote he says here, what if her idea of makeup is really to change her whole face? And there was a trend on TikTok for forever where it was like, don't let the men know, we can shapeshift, or, like, don't let the church know, we can shapeshift. And it really just kind of speaks to that of, like, yeah, makeup can do a lot, and it can, you know, people can turn their face into Sabrina Carpenter. Do I think that's what she's doing? No. I think she's just wearing a really nice makeup. I'm like, what primer are you using? What foundation are you using? And can you please teach me how to do my makeup? Like, please help me. I have, like, a cystic pimple on my chin right now, and that, like, it's like, my concealer doesn't, like, cover it. It's, like, just. Well, nothing, like, if it's that bad, nothing works. And so I'm like, the fact that he literally is just finding this out now after months, weeks of dating, I'm like, okay. By the sounds of how he was describing it, she didn't shapeshift. She just, you saw her natural skin. So I'm like, do you still like her? But it's giving, like, really toxic energy, too, with, like, I don't know if you ever saw this on social media, where people were like, take her on a first date and make sure you go swimming. Wow. Because, like, then you'll find out what she really looks like, so she doesn't pull a fast one on you. Wow. And that is also what it's reminding me of, where it's just, like, this really toxic energy. You know what's interesting is that when I was younger, I knew a guy, and, like, this really stood out to me because I, you know, being in Minnesota, like, I feel like specifically when we were younger, I felt like plastic surgery was so, like, whoa, like, bad plastic surgery. And, um, obviously things have, like, changed a lot now, but, like, that was kind of, like, how I grew up. No, it was used as a dig. Yeah, it was not. Especially in regards to women. It was not very. Which are typically the users of plastic surgery. But this person was telling me that, um, he was like, when I was a kid, he was like, oh, I would way rather have a woman have plastic surgery than cake on makeup because then they just, like, bait and switch people. And so, and again, we were kids, but, like. I just remember that sticking out to me because I was like, wait, what? Like, that's, like, not, like, what I, like, people normally in Minnesota were, like, chattering about. Um, so clearly this is, like, not the only person who's ever thought that. And it's, like, just makes me sad because I'm, like, guys literally have beards and hide imperfections on purpose. I've had many guys say that. The beard effect is real. The hat effect is real. Yes. The boyfriend glow up is real. I mean, there's so many things. Yeah. And we're just good souls that just accept these imperfections. And the guy in the story is clueless. Yeah. It feels unfair. It feels like an unfair expectation that, like, oh, I need to have a serious conversation with her about her makeup and her hiding acne from me. No, it's ridiculous. So many people on this planet wear makeup. And if it makes someone feel a little bit better, sure makes me feel better if I'm having a breakout and I can smudge some things a little bit. Like, I think at the end of the day, everyone should just feel good. And if you're going to hold that against her, you are not capable of being in a relationship with this person. Yeah, exactly. Or just in general. In general. Like, really, I don't know. You need to expand on your view of the world and people and makeup and maybe culture yourself out there. Get out from under your rock because what is life? Like, childbirth. Yeah. Yes. Seriously. Like, would you be able to handle, like, seeing your baby be born? Body changing. Growing old together. You know, there's so many things that can happen in life. Are you even ready for that to be a part of someone else's journey? And it's interesting because he does say that he's dated somebody with like skin issues before, like whatever that entails, and that he's like, but she was up front about it, so it didn't bother him. It feels like he really is viewing this as an insane lie. Yeah, exactly. And that's why I brought up that thing from when I was younger because I'm like, I don't know. It's so interesting to me because it's like we, yes, like makeup does, that's why we put it on. Like, it enhances, you know, like it's just makes you feel good. It's fun. Like, I literally do it for me. No one else. Makes me feel better. Yeah. Fun, creative for a lot of people. Yeah, exactly. So it's just like, I'm like, do you, first and earth is a good one. It's like, do you, are you not? What? Like, also like one of the comments here points out to like, quote, young person discovers that many people have acne. Yeah. You're 22. Like, yeah. You went through teenage years, high school, college, potentially young years where everyone has acne. Yeah. How did you not have acne? Lucky dude. But they go on to say, if you're expecting young people to have perfect skin, then oh boy, are you going to be disappointed? This notion of her deceiving you is complete bollocks. Everyone engages in grooming or styling that is intended to modify the appearance of the natural form. If you've worn a suit before, congratulations, you've deceived people. You've worn an item of clothing that is designed to make your shoulders and chest appear bigger than they actually are. Look at that. Yeah. Okay. And then people really do start kind of sounding off. Someone says, you're so self-involved. You think she wears makeup with the intention to deceive you? She couldn't possibly be wearing it because she likes it or because she's feeling insecure. And quite frankly, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. You do sound too clueless to notice if you didn't notice this at all. By the way, skin should have texture with or without makeup. How do you even know that she might be having a flare up? And it usually isn't that bad. You've known her for months, but I've seen her with breakouts for one day. The relationship is so fresh and this isn't a good start. I'd break up with her and absolutely all caps. Do not mention her skin. Or makeup. And to be clear, I'm suggesting a breakup so she can be free, not because she did anything wrong. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. This just sounds like a little like boat shoe douchebag. So I'm I'm good. Let her let her let her free. Let her free. Let her free. Please. My girl. And send her my way so she can teach me how to do makeup. Yeah, literally. If there's any makeup artists out there, I know we have a lot that listen because you have gifted me presents, whether it be at our Minnesota live show, or our New York live show. Thank you again. You know, I'm talking to that reminds me those earrings you gave me. I just found them. Remember, I was saying I lose earrings. And I've a lot of earrings from you guys via our P.O. box, which we are changing P.O. boxes. We will update that very soon. But if there's makeup artists out there and you live in L.A., can you please come and like do a makeup class for us? I would love that. Just please help. Please. I love that. But OK, we are going to move along to this next one. Story number two for us here. This is coming from Am I the Asshole titled Am I the Asshole for getting upset after my girlfriend handed me food with a hard seed without warning me? Hmm. My girlfriend and I got into an argument and I'm wondering if I'm overreacting. We were on a trip with her family. I did all of the driving, planned the itinerary and was already exhausted from the night before. By that point, I wasn't even hungry. She kept offering me food and encouraging me to eat, even though I said I wasn't hungry. Eventually, I took a bite just to stop the back and forth. It turned out to be a tamarind. And she didn't tell me there was a hard seed inside. I bit down hard enough that I thought I cracked my tooth and my jaw was sore for hours afterwards. I got angry and said, quote, why didn't you tell me there was a seed in the food? Instead of saying, sorry, I should have warned you. She told me it was my fault because she doesn't take big bites. This isn't the first time something like this has happened. In the past, she's handed me food with rinds or other unpleasant parts as a joke to get a laugh. So this felt like part of a pattern rather than an isolated mistake. What bothered me most wasn't the tamarind itself. It was that I felt pressured into eating when I wasn't hungry, wasn't warned about the seed, and then was blamed after I got hurt. She says, quote, you always get mad at me. While I feel like she dismisses my concerns, instead of acknowledging her part in what happened. Am I the asshole for getting angry and feeling disrespected? No, if I were him, I would be pissed. Okay, what's so crazy about this is I know why Bailey put this in here. Why? Because you had the opposite happen? Bailey put this one in here because it's kind of like, okay, you're taking this bite of this fruit. You've never had it. Like, why didn't you ask questions? Or like, why didn't you take a baby bite? Why'd you just throw the whole thing in your mouth? Like, is it your first day on earth? Like, never had a fruit? Like, you think about all the fruits that are out there. Peaches, nectarines, apples, like, they have cores, they have hard bite things. And so Bailey was like, is this your first day on earth guy? Let me see a photo. Okay, that'll help change my or like, okay, so this and also I'm probably not even pronouncing this right. This is a tamarind. Tamarind. Tamarind. Looks to me like a pea pod and edamame looking kind of food. I'm going to be honest, I have never seen this. I've never heard of this. I would go in with a lot of questions if someone offered this to me. Bailey's note, very cultural based, big popular candy in Mexico and things like that. So could be a cultural difference too. I'm telling you right now, I'm a very picky eater, have trouble with food. I think that if, if you're introducing somebody to a new food, I think the polite thing to do is to explain it to them without them, like, especially if you just keep on being like, eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it. Like incessantly. Yeah. And then he's like, all right, I'm going to eat it. I don't, like, I don't want to eat it. I can totally see it happening. Yeah. I can see myself being really pissed off. And it's like, yeah, sure. Like it could have been an easy mistake, but like I'm hurting. So like, at least just be like, oh my gosh, I'm sorry. Like next time I'll make sure to like, give you like, you know, like just because of the fact that I'm hurting. Yeah. Um, but I guess no one agrees and that's fine. So the overall vote on this one friends is asshole. Yeah. I'm going to be honest. I do think like, could he have asked more questions? Yes. But the line here, this isn't the first time something like this has happened in the past. She's handed me food with rind or other unpleasant parts as a joke to get a laugh. So this felt like a pattern rather than an isolated mistake. And that's exactly that line. If he wouldn't have had that, I would have been on board with everyone where it's like, asshole, like you should have asked questions, proceed slowly, take a small bite. But the fact that this is kind of a pattern with the girlfriend. Yeah. I'm like, this does feel like sabotage. No, it's totally to laugh at him. And she thinks it's funny. Um, I mean, maybe not, maybe not, but let's get into the comments. Cause maybe we could be swayed. Okay. I just like, I'm really picturing myself if I was in the situation. And even if it was an irrational frustration towards my partner, I would just hope that my partner would be like, like, Oh, I'm so sorry. You're hurting. Like I like make me feel better. Yeah. Like make me feel better. And then I could calm down and be like, it's fine. Like it's, it wasn't you. Like I should have slowed down. And I feel like, I feel like it's really powerful to diffuse when you see that somebody is hurt. And yes, I do. I understand like getting defensive when you feel like somebody's blaming you for something. That's not your fault. So I'm not, I'm not, I'm not surprised that like the girlfriend is also like, Whoa, chill out. Yeah. Understandable. So I can, I can see both sides. We're also very sensitive teeth girlies. Exactly. We are listening to this story with our own triggers right now. They're like sensitive. My teeth hurt my jaw. I'm like, I'm literally stretching out my jaw, reading this story, but let's get into the comments and see if we can maybe understand where the overall vote is coming from. Okay. Let's hear it. So top comment, you must have seriously crunched down on that thing. I think she could have warned you, but I also think you overreacted. It was a seed, not a razor blade. Did she know you had never had a tamarind before? I can't decide if it's everyone sucks here or no assholes here, but this seems very petty on both of your parts. It seems like you were reacting mostly to being tired and feeling unacknowledged for planning the itinerary. I think the seed was your medium to blow up at her. Mm-hmm. Yeah. The seed that broke the camel's back. Yeah. Literally. You know that's not the. Okay. No, I know. Okay. I know it's straw. Okay. I know it's straw. Rest assured, everyone. But I wouldn't be surprised if I did think it was actually seed knowing me. Dude, I like mixed up phrases today when I was doing a voice memo and I'm like, I'm turning into Morgan. Okay. Yeah. Someone responds to that. I'm going, everyone sucks here. If she does this shit as a regular prank. Someone responds, big red box, couple of different this awards, 3.1K upvotes. Who eats unfamiliar food by biting it hard enough to crack a tooth? Dude threw a little tantrum, hurt himself, and turned his rage outward. Which is, I mean, I did say if I was trying something I've never tried before, I would ask a lot of questions. Yeah. But I also have food sensitivities. I am very aversive. I'm very averse to new foods and foods that aren't in my safe zone. Right. And that's why I mean, Brian, he literally inhales something and I feel like I've known that. So if I were to have him, I feel like I would be like, I need to coach you through this because I've watched him shovel something in in five seconds. He probably would have swallowed the seed. It probably wouldn't have gotten crunched. No, you guys, I'm about to gross everyone the fuck out. So I've never, I've never tried an olive ever. Like I, I will only eat the sliced up black olives if they're on that like Mexican taco dip. So we're in Mallorca, we're at this hotel, we're getting restaurant food. That gross. This is disgusting. And so they delivered olives as like a side with like the bread we ordered. And I go, oh, olives. Cool. Nothing else was presented, right? Lauren starts eating the olives. I don't eat any. Cause I've never had an olive. I don't want to try it today. And all of a sudden there's like a little dish I noticed next to the olive that has things in it that look like pistachios. It just appeared. It just appeared all of a sudden. Magic. Magic. And I fucking put it in my mouth and I bite it. I thought you said you didn't bite it. I thought it was just when I bit that thing. I thought it was a pistachio. It looked like a pistachio. It had the shape of a pistachio. It was the size of a pistachio. It was not a pistachio. It was the pit from Lauren's olive that she had just spit out of her mouth. But you still had your hands in your mouth. No, you missed my chomp. Well, then you, I think I lied in the moment to make myself not feel bad and gross. I was like, did you eat it? And you were like, no, came close. I'm him. It is my first day on earth as well. And I was like, okay, that's good. No, I bit it. And I literally, I, in that moment I go, oh, and I'm really traumatized because I popped a crown off recently. From a life saver mint. And so all I envisioned to that moment is like, here I go eating Lauren's olive pit thinking it's a pistachio and I'm going to pop off another tooth. See, okay. See, this is actually a good example though, because in that moment, like I didn't do anything wrong. No. And none of that was my fault. Not at all. But if you started like, if you started tearing up, like, and being like, oh, Lauren, why don't you tell me? I would be like, I'm so sorry. You would apologize. Yeah. Like I, I, sorry, Morgan. I would also be like, I. I didn't know that I had to tell you, like, you know, but like, I would see that you're just like distraught. You would just want to like validate my feelings of like, God, you going through that is, I'm so sorry you went through that. Yeah. Right. I'll keep it in mind going forward to tell you, hey girl, it's not a pistachio. That's my, I'm putting my olive pit here. Yeah, exactly. So I think that's my point in this story is that like, he probably did get like a little too snappy with her and then she got defensive and I can understand getting defensive when someone snaps at you for something that you're like, I don't know. I didn't do this. Um, but like, I also just think that when you see that somebody is like. It's your partner. Yeah. Sometimes the compromise is apologizing when you feel you have nothing to apologize for. Like, I, and I genuinely believe that I think at the end of the day, like communicate and sometimes just, hey, I understand where you're coming from. I'm sorry. I'm sorry it went down like that. Like, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to make you feel like that. Or just like, I'm sorry. I didn't know you didn't know. Like, I will, I will give you heads up. Next time. Like, yeah, you know, just to, and again, I'm with you. Yeah. The comments are not though. We have a couple. more comments here i want to get through someone says you're the asshole you should probably look at what you're eating like as a minimum if he had never had a tamarind before he may not have known there was going to be a hard stone inside it's not super obvious just looking at it and i will agree with that it literally just looks like a peapod um someone else says what how big is it oh it is like a ginormous peapod it's like a banana it honestly i'm gonna find you a picture of someone holding it in their hand for size reference it's given big here's it on like see this big mixing bowl and spatula that's in comparison it is kind of banana like yeah it looks banana sized based on the pictures i am seeing maybe they can be smaller there's another comment here she needs to chew for you what the fuck you are not a baby are you you have eyes you can feel things etc come on you're the asshole fine cool you you yeah yeah i don't think he was asking to be baby birded but you're entitled to your take you're entitled to your take say so this one i would be intrigued if we are just listening with our triggers today i'm very curious those out there we're gonna put a poll on this one bailey's gonna remind me when we go live um do you think tamarind boy hard seed chomp guy is the asshole is it everyone sucks or just no assholes here i'm very curious where our listenership falls the other thing is like i guess we don't really have details on the anger like like was he to unless i missed it but like if he was just like what the heck and annoyed i don't think that that's that's deep you know whereas like if he started cussing at her and being like you're a piece of shit tamarin shit he again he said i got angry and said why didn't you tell me there was a seed in the food yeah that see to me i'm like why big blow up yeah from that unless we're missing something did he edit it everyone else is responding because they we could be missing something and i'm just like i don't know to me i feel like that's like a honestly both of them are pretty normal human reactions so maybe just everyone sucks yeah or everyone's human or no assholes here and just like work on your shit guys we're gonna see we're gonna let the people decide okay moving on to story number three though this episode is brought to you by credit karma breathe in now breathe out you feel that that's the calm of having intuit credit karma in your corner if you're trying to get your life together in this crazy world credit karma is a great place to start with the money stuff your credit score isn't just a number it can unlock better rates more options and real savings so whether you're moving leasing a car or upgrading your cards it feels good knowing your credit is working for you when you start to feel like there's too much on your plate you can count on credit karma for less craziness and more credit thanks to credit karma i realized i missed some student loan payments thanks credit karma story number three for us here coming from am i the asshole titled am i the asshole for not taking my fiance to the restroom mid-movie me 21 male and my fiance 21 female went with my family to watch a movie and i was like oh my god i'm gonna die i'm gonna die with my family to watch the odyssey we were all excited since it's been one of the most anticipated movies of the year about 20 minutes in she grabbed my arm to cuddle i like cuddling during movies but with the theater armrests it was awkward and uncomfortable so i pulled my arm back and sat normally about 10 minutes later she whispered that her stomach was hurting i quietly told her she'd be okay around 20 minutes later she mouthed that she needed to fart but didn't want to because my family was sitting next to me and i was like oh my god i'm gonna die i'm gonna die i'm gonna die my family was sitting nearby i told her if she needed to it was okay about 15 or 20 minutes later she said the same thing again she needed to fart then another 20 minutes later she said that she needed to use the restroom there were warning signs i told her that if she needed to go she should go she asked me to come with her i said no because i wanted to keep watching the movie and since i didn't need to use the restroom i didn't see the point in both of us leaving every 15 to 20 minutes for the rest of the movie she was tapping me and continued saying she needed to go and for me to go with her i was getting irritated because i was trying to focus on the movie while being interrupted repeatedly i kept telling her if she really needed to go to just go but she kept insisting she didn't want to go alone and wanted me to come with her the repeated interruptions made it harder for me to follow the movie and i started feeling more frustrated as it went on when the credits rolled i sarcastically said quote now you can go use the restroom since you were bothering me the whole movie we all used the restroom talked about the movie on the drive home and everything seemed fine when we got back to my house she was clearly upset i asked what was wrong and she said i'd put the movie ahead of her health i responded that she is an adult and didn't need me to accompany her to the restroom she ended the conversation by saying quote yeah i don't need you okay later she texted that she has serious bathroom issues and that i wasn't taking her health seriously from my perspective it never seemed like a medical emergency it seemed like she wanted me to walk with her because she didn't want to leave alone she says i prioritized the movie over her my sarcastic comment was rude and i didn't care about her health run i agree the comment was unnecessary but i also felt like it was inconsiderate to repeatedly interrupt the movie over something that she was capable of handling herself i don't think she was unable to go because i didn't accompany her by the way just to rule this out this is not an unsafe theater or area whatsoever she would not be in any danger or harm walking anywhere in this theater alone so was i in the wrong here i'm looking for honest opinions this is this is actually the movie how to lose a guy in 10 days um yeah actually like i don't i don't know what to say 21 you're not a seven-year-old at despicable me you are perfectly capable of going to the restroom this is also i'm pretty sure the run time on the odyssey is like three hours it's three hours every time i talk to someone who says that they've seen it instead of when i say how was it instead of saying it was good first they they go it was long very good long i i'm really surprised and i think this should be honestly a common thing in theaters and i get why they don't do it break i love an intermission that would be great i love going to broadway musicals and knowing i'm gonna get a chance to pee i love an intermission so true let me refill on snacks i would for sure buy more let me get another one i'm gonna get another one i'm gonna get another one i'm gonna get another one i see and pee in peace without missing anything if it's over an hour and a half i think that would be great yeah yeah yeah this three hours how are you sitting there hot boxing everyone in this theater with an upset stomach like just go to the bathroom fart i know fart just fart yeah i will fart in a loud theater right next to justin that does not faze me just fart yeah someone definitely cropped us to me today yeah it's just fine just fart i feel so horrible the other we've come a long way haven't we what with what just the farting oh yeah people still send me uh the fart cake or that article of the girl who got paralyzed because she wouldn't fart that's horrible i get sent that at least a couple times a week and i appreciate that you are concerned for my health but i will rest assured toot city at my house there you go we're fine you're healthy now i'm just passing gas yeah you know what did this turn into you needed that is what i saw that was that was a moment that you really needed so apparently apparently i love that little kid um do go on lauren i'm so sorry i've derailed this train you're good i think i might be in a like a slower wavelength as you today so i'm struggling to keep up no the past couple episodes i've recorded i need to start putting a limit on the caffeine intake because is that what that is i like it though i i would like to match you right now i was we could go have an espresso shot across the street it's too late for that i'm working on my sleep and self-care how do we get back how do we get back maybe this way can you imagine just being tapped the whole movie no it pissed me off so much i have to fart can you take me to the bathroom yeah can you make sure i get in there will you wipe my butt too oh my god no no no no no no i will not also let's say he does walk her to the bathroom what if she needs 20 minutes in there sometimes you get in there and you don't know how long you're gonna need if her stomach is this upset where it is a medical emergency and he is neglecting her health i also it almost feels like she's just like purposely testing him like it feels it feels really odd like it i don't know i mean i guess maybe do people genuinely think like like this i don't think so i do think this is more of a test actually now that you say that because I mean they're engaged at 21 very young yeah you know maybe this is their first relationship is she pregnant I don't think so because like if that were to be a factor I wonder if that's plays into it where she's just like if I need something like you know what I mean I don't know because like that would change things a little bit for me I'm not seeing anything in regards to her being pregnant in the initial comments I'm not seeing an update on this interestingly enough though OP does respond to this comment that says I'm leaning towards you're the asshole in that particular moment in the theater where you are whispering and it's hard to communicate it's very difficult to get her full story she asked for your support multiple times and you didn't understand why but clearly she felt she needed you in that specific moment it doesn't matter whether or not her reasonings are legitimate the results are going to be different and she's going to be your behavior is that you were incurious to her situation and wound up dismissing her concerns see I'm sorry but like if roles were reversed and I was sitting there and my partner kept doing that to me being like I gotta fart I gotta fart I gotta use the bathroom what do you mean what do you mean I'm confused they just told me what they need to do like what well and I think too like modern times people have phones like if it's if it's more than that like and you're in a theater it's loud I have heard from people this is the loudest movie they've ever gone to please if you're gonna go see the scene you haven't seen it yet bring earplugs but you could type it out like hey I'm actually genuinely having a problem can you please escort me to the bathroom I'm scared I'm not gonna come out I'm scared I'm gonna pass out on the toilet I'm blah blah blah blah blah like whatever you're going through if he could hear her say I gotta fart multiple times he could have heard her say I'm scared I'm gonna pass out true the person does go on to say you prioritized a movie over her attempt to reach out to you shut up when she was distressed grow up they keep going they just they they go on they go on they go on this she found the post and this is her this is her that's literally my first thought yeah op does respond this is totally fair and I appreciate your response it didn't end up being an emergency or anything of that sort when I found out later on it's not uncommon for her to blow things out of proportion or make things sound way worse than they actually are so it's difficult for me to tell if it's a true emergency or not it's kind of like the boy who cried wolf we had regardless yes the simple response would be to walk her to the bathroom and figure out what's going on and then afterwards have that conversation thank you and that is something I was going to say too where it's like you spent three hours of her tapping you interrupting so much so to the point you even say I couldn't focus on the movie yeah you might as well just go do it just go do it you might as well do it but like at the same time then I'd be pissed because I'm like I didn't have to use the there is a theater in Orange County that like I know people that in weeks in advance could only get one seat had to sit by themselves not go with friends it was front row but like that's how sought after it was so like my point is is that it's like this was like the movie that like people have been really excited about and so I understand why he didn't why he was just like thinking okay this is the last tap this is the last time she's going to tell me she has to fart and now I can probably was like this is the last time yeah but like but yeah like would it have probably been better for him if he just like went with her and I guess better for both of them sure but like that's what you call enabling so I don't know I don't know how I feel about that so we have an interesting plot twist here oh my god stop don't tell me I've been talking shit in the wrong direction the entire time no so someone comments to op she did make a post and then deleted it when all of the commenters called her the asshole so that's not a plot twist that is a plot validate but so we go we click it's on am I the asshole it is titled am I the asshole for being upset that my fiance wouldn't take my stomach issues seriously during a movie the post has been deleted by the person that posted it top comment you're the asshole you are old enough to go to the toilet on your own you're the asshole you're the asshole you're the asshole just bam bam bam bam bam but op responds and says hold up I had no clue lol that may be her but to be completely honest it seems like someone copied my text put it into chat gpt and asked to write it from the other perspective the quotes and everything are identical so that may be the case thanks for letting me know though bailey's chiming in says uh very clearly chat gpt automod does have it pasted make sure that the the post is linked if you guys want to go down and read it from the automod but it does basically read as the other side and a chat gpt prompt honestly like there's a line here from her emotionally I felt abandoned everyone's entitled to their feelings would I me feel emotionally abandoned because I wouldn't get walked to the bathroom no you would tell Justin to go to the other side of the universe so that he didn't hear you dude no and I would fart right next to him okay you guys are there now he's still when did this happen they just slip out okay wow this is great I got a lot of gas yeah he still pretends like he's never heard one though so he can live in denial but I'm letting him rip yeah it's fine silent no there's noise mine are very unpredictable they're oftentimes loud and deadly we don't get the silent type wow it's not not not fun for me there is a couple other comments here though someone does say the emergency was that she's trying to figure out if you'll show her you care to an irrational degree so that she can feel loved I'll save you the suspense people who have deep self-esteem issues never feel loved enough no matter what you do someone responds yes this is her version of would you still love me if I was a worm she sounds like an insufferable child not the asshole people are commenting major red flags op get out now um forget about this guy someone says what health issue requires him to accompany her to the restroom someone else not the asshole are you sure she's 21 and not two yeah no I think that like something like this and entering in a such a big commitment like a marriage I don't want to be that person that's just like I don't want to be that person that's just like I don't want to be that person that's just like I don't want to be that person that's just like jump ship but at the same time I think that hop I don't think you guys are ready for marriage right now or at least at least she's not because that's just that's really it's not a healthy way to unhealthy expectation out of another person in general like or even just the communication then after exactly yeah like you neglected a major health concern just say you felt unloved yeah emotionally abandoned exactly exactly say how you feel don't manipulate the situation into then again boy who cried wolf exactly but let's get into uh marriage and what happens when a marriage doesn't go well I wish we had an update we have to go to the next one okay nothing all right but it's new but that was honestly just came out yeah you know you're right he's very active in the comments maybe we'll see it okay there's hope odyssey boy fart boy chime in yeah frat boy fart oh fart boy take a shot every time morgan says fart people are gonna be wasted okay this next one is coming from r slash when women refuse it is titled my friend is getting a divorce and her husband is pretending like he doesn't know what this means so my friend katie and her husband alex were having a conversation about their cat the cat is elderly and has health problems that are interfering with its life they've taken it to the vet many times and tried different things but nothing is working and the cat continues to have problems during this conversation katie suggested that she would get a divorce and that she would get a divorce and that perhaps they need to think about putting the cat down well alex exploded he started shouting at her and basically called her a horrible person and said a lot of other things and it came out in all of his shouting that he had been having an affair he claimed it had been going on for a couple of months but katie subsequently learned alex had been cheating off and on with this woman for all caps 10 years so of course she was like you broke our marital vows and you've been lying to me for ages i cannot trust you i want a divorce and since the house is in my name that means you must move out asap so she gave him a deadline to move out a few days later alex still had not moved out and katie returned home from work to find that he had purchased a tomato plant she was like alex what the fuck you're not going to move out i'm not going to move out i'm not going to move out you were moving into an apartment why buy a plant you aren't going to have a yard anymore and he said quote i thought i could spend four days a week with a fair partner and three days with you oh that's a great idea why did i think of that as if he didn't understand what a divorce was what is happening as if she would want joint custody of this lying unfaithful piece of shit alex finally did move out and in with his affair partner but left all of his stuff behind He refused to come get it until Katie threatened to find the most expensive moving company in the Chicago metro area and have all of his stuff sent to his affair partners and then send Alex the bill. He continues to call and text her and email her, begging her to take him back. He will not take no for an answer, and Katie is like, what part of I want a divorce do you not understand? She's trying to force the divorce through as quickly as she can, which is very quickly, as they have no children or joint property. She found out about the affair in May, and the divorce is likely to be finalized before July is over with. And he still thinks if he begs her enough, she might take him back. He still acts like he can't understand why she's doing this. This grown-ass man acting like he doesn't understand that actions have consequences. I just want to know, like, I want to have, like, a screen up and see what's going through his head. Yeah. Like, I just, because, like, I'm like, is he that delusional? Like, is there some underlying mental health issue that he's dealing with that's, like, making him truly not understand what's going on? Or does, is he saying, like, if I just keep swimming, just keep swimming, that, like, eventually, if I just pretend like it's not happening, and then she's going to be like, oh, okay. It's not happening. She'll get over it. Yeah. I'm going to move that tomato plant in there. She's going to see I can garden really well. Yes. Yeah. And she's going to fall back in love with me. It's perfect. Perfect plan. That's great. Brilliant. And can we just talk about the fact that he wanted to split custody with his affair partner and his ex-wife? Joint custody. Joint custody. What did he say here? How many days? I'll spend four days a week with affair partner and three days with you. Why does she get four? I was your actual wife. Yeah. Why am I not getting four? Yeah. And she's getting three. Well, because you decided to leave me, honey. It's just. She gets one more. You guys could fight for the extra day. No. He would literally use that, and he'd hear that, and he'd be like, you're fighting over me? That's so sweet. You must still really love me. Still, we should. Maybe we put a pause. Yeah. Put a pin in the divorce. Yeah. You love me. But still four days a week. Like, dude, don't you just want to go be with her? It's really interesting to me, people that have affairs, and it's like, okay, we're done. You're free. Go be with her. Go be with that person. And then they're like, wait, wait, wait. No, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's why he had an affair for 10 years, is because he wanted both. 10 years? 10 years is. He wanted both. That's the thing, is like, I think that, like, there's different types of affairs. You know, there's an exit affair where it's like, the marriage really is not working out. They all of a sudden find somebody else that's making them feel, you know, whatever. And then they, you know, run off to that partner. But like, an affair for 10 years, like, that's got to be they want them both. They genuinely want them both. Eat a cake, eat a two. And honestly, I mean, you probably get to year three, and you're like, I've been getting away with it so far. And then as the years goes on. It becomes normalized. Five. He doesn't even see anything wrong with it, because it's been that ingrained in the way that he operates. Yeah, 10 years, a decade. It's a long time to, like, play two different roles. Exhausting. Yeah. I can't fathom it. I can't fathom the hurt that that would cause. And like, I would never want to hurt someone. I don't want to hurt someone like that. Like, I cannot fathom that level of disrespect. I don't think, I feel like, I mean, there's obviously people who don't give a shit that it, like, hurts people. But I feel like some people just, like, they don't think of it as hurtful, you know? Yeah. And I could see some of this being maybe, like, weaponized incompetence, where it's like, I don't know what divorce is. Yeah, exactly. Wah! And it's like, just him trying to, like, play dumb so it doesn't happen. I mean, we see that with silly people. There's, like, silly things about, I don't know how to do the dishes. I don't know how to do laundry. And you just kind of slide by. I have someone in my life that is going through a divorce right now. And her ex is basically just, like, having these unrealistic demands of, like, well, you owe me this. And, well, you got that when we were married. And so I should get half of that. And it's, it's silly things like the value of their car. And just, like, really unrealistic things. And so. Wait, what do you mean the value of their car? Well, it's like, you got this nice car while we were together. Like, I don't get that car. So you should pay me for half of it. Like, diabolical, crazy things. And it's, like, I don't want to get into the details too much. So they're, like, I don't want them identified. But they told me I can talk about it. I'll tell you. I'll tell you offline. But this person is, like, asking for unrealistic things, asking for half of stock value. Like, crazy stuff. And he's moving in with his new girlfriend. And it's, like, I kind of told her, I was, like, just wait. I go, he's going to want to propose to her. She's going to want him to not be married anymore. Just wait. I go, you don't have to bargain with the terrorist. Like, just wait it out. Because he's going to be motivated eventually. And he's going to want a sign. And that's, like, kind of this. It's just, like, let him play dumb. Mm-hmm. Proceed as you can. Try to get the divorce. You know, whatever. But, like, don't appease him. See, stuff like this is, like, I'm, like, do I want to get married? You'll find the right person. And you're, like, yeah. No. I'm, like, why can't we just symbolically get married? Yeah. I'm, like, I don't. Just have the party. Why do I have to have the legalities when, like, I hear stuff like this that I'm, like, I feel like if I'm going through something super emotionally heightened, then the idea of having to, like, delegate all of these other finances and things like that and having them be, like, I don't know. I feel like that just sounds so stressful. That's also what prenups are for. Have everything very clearly defined. Your exit plan is in place. And not because you're predicting a divorce, but because the state already has an exit plan predetermined for you if you don't have a prenup. We do have some comments to get into. People just really, like, chiming in for support. Someone says, quote, she broke up with me out of nowhere. Out of nowhere for no reason. I hate people like that. That statement is always a red flag. Absolutely no self-awareness or ability to do some self-reflecting. OP responds, Katie has put the whole thing on public social media and telling everyone she knows so all of their friends know exactly why they are getting a divorce. And Alex can't pretend to be a victim. Poor Alex. I wish I saw this on my social media. If I was just clicking one day and seeing someone blast their partner. We have seen that. Who? One of your exes. Oh, God, he's always so problematic. Next comment we've got here. Thank goodness he told her, but I am sad about the cat. Letting our fur babies go when it's their time is hard, but right. And OP responds, Alex abandoned the cat. He has shown no interest in it since the affair came out. Didn't take it with him and refuses. He refuses to contribute to the vet bills. Hmm. So it wasn't really about the cat. Mm-mm. Yeah. Alex sounds really shitty. I just peeked at OP's account. We don't have any updates. They are very active on Reddit, though. Very involved in kind of random and obscure subreddits like r slash medical gore. Not getting into that for us today. No, thank you. R slash Wikipedia. A lot of posts. They are very, very, very active. I don't think if I have ever in my life seen this much karma on someone's account. Wow. So username is cat poot in my shoe, but going by the name Megan on here and the bio is I run the Charlie project. Look it up. And I post medical case reports, history, et cetera. Here. If you like my content and want to support it, join my patron or tip me. She has a link in the description. I'll post it in the description. She has 4.8 million karma points. Wow. 64,000 different contributions. What? Eight year Reddit account. A lot of awards. Again, I don't know if I've ever seen this many awards on an account. What does that mean? Like, what does that mean? So every time like you post something, if people upvote, you get a karma point. If people like a comment you posted and they click upvote, you get a karma point. So she has again, almost 4.8 million. So she has again, everything that she posts, though, like she's getting love for it. Most of it. What is she posting that's like getting that much love? I mean, stuff like this, this post that I just read 2.6k. So she's just like posting other people's business, too, because I'm like, for someone to have that much, I'm like, are you like, is it your life story? And you're just like giving updates. And it's always that crazy. I'm gonna be honest. This seems like her job. Yeah. So looking at the Charlie Project, I have actually heard about the Charlie Project thing since the true crime work and stuff I've been working on. The Charlie Project profiles over 17,000 cold cases, missing people mainly from the United States. It doesn't actively investigate. It is merely a publicity vehicle for missing people who are often neglected by the press and forgotten all too soon. And I mean, she's saying that she runs it. This is a full time job. Yeah. So she's posting these updates on Reddit. She's probably getting karma from that. So really, really cool. I'm very curious. This is going to be like a little deep dive idea. do on patreon i'm gonna go through some of her posts in my shoe i just love how like you guys were so unfazed by like this username like it was just like yeah yeah that's the usual it's really it's really interesting she also does um a patreon charlie project patreon and does a missing person of the week which is what i started doing over on clues as well so it's just it's really she's doing a lot of amazing amazing work so i'm definitely gonna do a little deep dive on her account and some other threads she's posting i know i'm i'm overdue for a true crime episode on this show and i really want to do highlight some cold cases that are maybe close to being solved because there are a lot of them and reddit has solved cold cases from the internet sleuths the internet detectives so this episode is brought to you by state farm so this podcast is all about choices wild messy wait you did what choices but for the choices that are actually straightforward state farms got over 19 000 local agents real humans ready to help you like helping you save when you choose to bundle home and auto with the personal price plan bundling just another way to save with the personal price plan like a good neighbor state farm is there prices are based on ratings plans that vary by state coverage options are selected by the customer availability amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state this episode is brought to you by facebook so you were scrolling on marketplace and there it was the bike you've been searching for you sent a message and it turned out the seller was super chatty kind of funny and an avid cyclist the next thing you know you're in a cycling crew well a community cycling group the thing about facebook you might find more than what you're looking for from a browse to a bike ride this summer find more on facebook this episode is brought to you by disney plus and hulu we're going retro for real with disney plus and hulu throwbacks on disney plus throw it back to hannah montana the princess diaries camp rock and that's so raven then turn back the clock with hulu with golden girls full house malcolm in the middle and gilmore girls oh snap it's your favorite throwbacks from disney plus and hulu all of these and more now totally streaming 18 plus only offer valid for eligible subscribers only terms apply i'm gonna put that on our radar but moving along to this next one okay lauren i really loved that intro you did for our friend why don't why don't you introduce who's here now um can we just keep the one that i did i felt like it was really natural and beautiful dc's in the host here we go guys this has been a big request from all of you out there i think since we started really talking about direct caterpillar and then we did the theme that was literally all direct caterpillar and then we did the theme that was literally all direct caterpillar and then we did the theme that was literally all direct caterpillar and then we did direct caterpillar stories and i think ever since then everyone has been like get direct caterpillar on and guess what we got him we have matt joining us today glad to be here i'm so excited how long have you been on reddit because the direct caterpillar account is four years old now but like how long have you been on reddit and kind of doing this um ironically i was on reddit years prior i had an account didn't really do anything with it but this account is really the account that i have done everything with it is four years yeah three years with the sub it's amazing like looking at your account so you have five million seven hundred and seventy eight thousand and eighty six karma six thousand seven hundred and ninety four contributions fifty nine different achievements eleven trophies i mean you are you're decorated you you've got the credentials you know over time it's built up but i always look for the weird stories the ones that are just a little bit different because you get tired of just the same old i mean how many times can you do a cheating story or an open marriage story i'm with you i completely agree that's why i love just going to your account i like you always find the best ones did you know sorry you go ahead oh i was just curious did you know um two hot takes at all or was i mean i'm just so curious like how yeah how did you morgan reach out to you like did you already know who two hot takes were or yeah what did you think when i messaged you um first i knew you subverted prior because i did get a lot of stories from yourself yeah very good stuff uh the day you reached out was probably the weirdest message i ever received and i received some weird messages oh man i love how this is described it took me a second to kind of figure out okay you're like wait you want to make an entire theme about me it was a little bit weird and uh we had a little bit of a chuckle going you know behind the scenes but yeah oh my god that's so funny i literally cried i was hoping you were gonna be like morgan's my hero i was so excited no absolutely not oh my god that's so great i'm tearing up this is so funny um the other question i had and bailey too especially because like bailey's been finding reddit stories now for years and we're so curious about the karma and like what do you do with the karma can you cash it out you don't do anything with it it's worth nothing what you can't do anything with it you literally have been doing this for four years just just for fun just just for the love of the game really love of the game oh my god just trying to find the hard to find ones the ones that you can't really find anywhere it's almost for you does it feel like you're like metal detecting or rock collecting or something like that i don't know it's like a puzzle solving thing yeah that is so cool i find a great post and then i come across an update and it's like gone so it can take months just to find it wow that's amazing what was that site that you used to use the way back the way back way back machine yeah is and that doesn't exist anymore oh no i still use that i haven't got uh 18 sources to find posts and it's just going from one to the other so i'm not sure i'm not sure i'm not sure i'm not sure i'm not sure i just had had one i found a post and an update 12 years old and it was great i can't remember where the hell it was you'll you'll find it you'll get it back i'm trying to find it again i'm going to the same source i've been going for like days oh my gosh okay well this first one i'm going to read for you is one you found a couple of years ago and it's coming from best of no updates which is my favorite sub that you basically run and i know a lot of people listening are like no give me an update we'll get there guys don't worry but this one i'm hoping maybe we'll get it out there for you and then they'll come back and give you an update so this one is coming from am i the asshole titled am i the asshole for making our guests participate in our puppet themed wedding my fiancee 26 female and i 27 male met at college we were in our school's performing arts program and met in a puppetry class in the class we designed our own puppets mine named hat boy and my fiance's daisy she's better with names were what we initially used to talk to each other and then flirt in class we fell in love and in a way we've considered hat boy and daisy in love as well years after graduating we still use hat boy and daisy both at home and at our local but fairly prominent theater where we perform puppet shows with high-end muppet style puppets while planning our wedding we realized we wanted hat boy and daisy to be a part of the ceremony they've been with us since the beginning and it just felt right we also invited our entire troop of puppeteers from the theater and got the idea that we should have our wedding completely officiated by puppets and that our wedding parties would be made up of puppets with our closest puppeteer friends we figure it'll make for incredible pictures here's where we aren't sure if we're the assholes or not we are insisting that all of our guests also participate and use puppets in lieu of gifts we've asked everyone to purchase high quality but not nearly the quality of professional puppets to have for puppets to use during our wedding we took the guesswork out of it and directed them to several vendors some of who offer some really cool options everyone could realistically expect to spend 150 to 500 depending on what sort of details and whatnot that they wanted lost me we also want everyone to wear their puppets during the entire wedding and reception all the puppets we're suggesting can be mounted on and controlled with one hand the puppets are meant to be guests at the wedding in the same way all of our human guests are there as well Well, let's just say there are a lot of people not happy. Both of our parents, my wife's sister, and my family members on both sides have complained that this is completely unreasonable. They're concerned about how much they're going to be able to eat and drink. How are they going to dance? You don't need hands to dance, so I don't know where that complaint came from. We, of course, don't expect people to have their puppet on their hand while in the bathroom, but everywhere else, we'd really like to insist on it. We also made sure that our hors d'oeuvres are all finger food. There will be plenty of cocktail tables so people can put their drink down. We even made sure that all of the food for the dinner itself is portioned so that it can be eaten in bite sizes just with a fork without having to use a knife. We really think this would make for a special day. We only get to do it once and think it will be an event that all of our guests will remember for a lifetime. We have a hard time believing that once there, they wouldn't have a blast. So, Reddit, are we the asshole for making what we think is a silly but harmless and reasonable request for our one special day? Thanks for reading. This was a find. What are your thoughts on this, Matt? I actually love it because it's like an Avenue Q wedding, you know? I mean, what is Avenue Q? Wow. You don't remember that? I'm looking it up. I actually have an uncle who is a professional puppeteer. His name is Steve. And so, he has a lot of these puppets. And I'm going to have to reach out and be like, were you involved in Avenue Q? But yeah, it is. Looking at pictures of Avenue Q, it is kind of giving that vibe for sure. It's how I just imagined this wedding being. Like, the most. weirdest wedding ever. I agree. I'm curious, when you say that you like this, like, do you like the idea of it as in it'd be fun to have a puppet wedding? Because, like, I don't. I agree. Like, that's kind of a vibe. Well, I like the idea of participating but not having a puppet-themed wedding. Yeah. Yeah. It wouldn't be your choice for. No. So, I agree. I think it would. It honestly would be hilarious. And if that's really important to them, it'd be great. But my problem is with weddings is, like, when people start to get too controlling of other people wanting them to do or be or purchase certain things. Like, I, you know, when you have a wedding, I think, really, it should be about having people just gather together. And so, when it gets kind of to that point where. Yeah. And that's the thing, too, is, like, 150 to 500. That's insane. Like, I mean, especially for, like, each one of your guests, like, to expect that from something that they're not going to use again, likely, for most of them probably don't have the same type of affinity for this topic. And the other thing, too, I was talking about with somebody is that when people buy people wedding gifts, it's like, even though they're still giving the gift to somebody else, it's like they like to be able to pick out what they're spending their money to gift somebody else. Like, that's something that I've heard a lot of people kind of complain about. I totally understand, like, having a honeymoon fund, that's something that I would put up on there, too, for a wedding. But, like, I've heard people be like, that's all they did. And I really wanted to get them, like, something, you know, and they said no gifts. And I had this idea that I wanted for them. And so, it's like people do like to give gifts in a way that's from their heart. So, that's where I have a problem with this. And then just the, like, wearing it the entire time, that's too controlling. But, like. The concept itself is fun if they provided the puppets and if they said they could take them off when they want to. Yeah. I mean, that's what makes it, you know, just a little bit too much. Exactly. Too much is just perfect. And I do agree. Like, some people don't even gift $150 to someone. And when the puppets are starting at that price, it's a little steep. I did peek at eBay. And I'm like, I wonder what eBay has for. Puppets. You can get some pretty decent puppets on eBay for $16.50, $8. So, I think if you didn't set that, you need to go to these vendors, I think it could go over. It could go over well. Yeah. But the question I'm wondering is, what happens to the puppets after the wedding? That's a good question. Or do you get to keep them? Yeah. Because they did. I would say, like, in lieu of wedding gifts, we want them to buy these puppets. So, that is a really good question of, like, is the couple then keeping all of these? Because, like, for me, like, I don't even know if I'd want a puppet in my house. No. I'd be too afraid it'd come alive at night. I know. I know. Looking at eBay, there's actual ventriloquist dolls. No. No, thank you. I saw that one movie where the guy was killed and he was actually used as a ventriloquist. Oh, God. Did anyone see that movie? No. Yes, I did. Thank you, Matt. Thank you. I love that movie. What is it called? Oh, um. I know I can picture the actor that way. Dead Silence. Dead Silence, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, that movie was crazy. Crazy. The follow was creepy. It really was. So, top comment on the original podcast. You're the asshole. You're not like bad people, but Jesus Christ, I'd never want to associate with y'all ever again. I'm exhausted and infuriated reading this. Your quirky nonsense is going to keep people away. Would you? Yeah. Would you go? Yeah. Yeah. Would you just buy the cheapest puppet? Yeah. Matt, you said you're down for it. All I'm down for is the same. I just go. I would also. I would obviously completely. I would also complain about it to the rest of the guests. Like, how crazy is this? But then I'd be like, this is hilarious and iconic. There's some things in life that you just do for the plot. Exactly. I just feel like I just would. But, like, I also. I think sometimes, too, for people when they're going to a wedding, like, you don't really know what's going on in their lives at that time. And if they're traveling and booking, like, the hotels and everything that they're doing, maybe they're bringing their kids, finding babysitters. It just feels like another thing to, like, ask of everyone to have to have this, like, handcrafted, like, specific. It just feels like kind of. It does feel like it's asking for a bit much. There's a comment here on Matt's post on Best of No Updates where someone says, would be the easiest RSVP no out of any wedding invite I've ever gotten. I'm like, I think people need to be a little more open-minded. It could be fun. Oh, good. It could definitely be fun. I'd be out there having conversations through the Muppet. Yeah. I mean, you have to go all out on this thing. Oh, yeah. The Muppet needs a drink as well. Like, oh, two? Two? One for me and one for this guy here? You know? Yeah. I just, like, love how much Matt loves this. And it's. Just, like, a recap on my favorite moments of Matt so far is Morgan messaging him. Weird. Puppet. Puppet wedding? Not weird. Oh, man. That's great. Okay. Well, let's get into the second story. Also, again, from Direct Caterpillar on Best of Redditor Updates, originally posted to r slash legal advice. And this one is titled, Last month, a friend began to cross a flooded river in his car with me in it. I jumped out. Now I have a letter from his lawyer asking for damages. Early in November, we went to pick up car parts after work that my friend, who I'll call Aaron, because his name's Aaron and I think he's being an idiot, had bought on eBay. We had to go through some back roads to get to the property and pick it up. And all was well. It had been raining for a part of the day, but really picked up when we were loading the parts. And we got to a causeway that we'd passed only an hour before, but it was now covered in what looked like half a meter of water. And we stopped. I'd been navigating and knew that we could back up and take another, much longer route, even though the highway was just a bit on the other side of this causeway. There was no way I'd go through the water as it looked, but because I'd been caught on a causeway 20 years ago in less water and had my car pushed off into the river, I didn't want to risk it. I didn't lose that car, but it's one of the scariest moments of my life. I said, We had to turn back and could take a different road 10 kilometers around, but that would take us via a bridge on the same river. Aaron decided to push on and started moving, and I panicked and I got straight out of the car. It was far more water than I'd had to go through when I nearly lost my car and life previously. I got out well before the water, though, so I didn't let water in the car, by the way. Aaron, Aaron didn't even get halfway across, and the water pushed his car off the side, rolled it completely over, and it ended up right on the back of the car. bank 50 meters downstream. Wow. He was extremely lucky not to drown and I ran down and helped him out. Immediately he was aggressive and combative because he said with my weight in the car he'd have made it across. Oh my god. Admittedly I'm 130 kilograms but his car is a 1650 kilogram Commodore Wagon with a couple hundred kilograms of eBay parts in the back. So it's not like I would have made much of a difference. That's so frustrating. We phoned for help and the river went down within an hour and made it across the causeway by foot. We haven't spoken since and he's avoided me in places we usually go. But on Friday I received a letter from a lawyer that I know is real in our town but it sounds like it was written by my friend. It's asking for 50,000 for the car and personal damages because I made the car unsafe by getting out. This guy's an idiot. It was a 1997 Commodore maybe worth $1,500 on a good day. Someone reassure me that it's not up to me to sit in someone's car when they're doing something dumb. No you're you're very correct. So there's that. Oh my god. What did you think when you found this one? I thought that the friend was an idiot. I'd agree with you. Genuinely. Yeah. I don't think it would help either right? Like it wouldn't. No. Like there's no way. Water is just gonna push your car. It doesn't matter how much weight you have in it. It's just gonna move. Yeah. No that's so scary and like imagine it rolled and like you're not able to get out. Like does he have a window breaker in his car? I do. I do have one of those little like window breakers for emergency. I do too. Everyone should have one. I do too. I got I was getting like slammed with ads non-stop on TikTok and I was like all right guys. They convinced you. Like bought like five. They convinced you. So Matt put some relevant comments here. Someone says so what I gather from this friend wants to cross river washed road. You say it's a bad idea. He says nah mate I'm doing it. You get out at fear for your own safety. Friend drives in and car washes away. Your friend blames you because 130 kilograms could have saved it. Yeah that sounds like a crock of shit. I don't think you are liable for shit. However I would consult an attorney for legal advice pertaining to this situation. You were in imminent danger and acted on it by ensuring your own safety. There's nothing wrong with that. However, do not repost responses here and show him what people say to you. You could be liable for reasons or even be incriminated. Wait for what reasons? They don't say. That's what they say. You could be liable for reasons. What? Unknown to me. I have no clue. I also what do you guys think about this because like I feel very positive that the friend wrote this and then put the name of the lawyer on the letter because it just doesn't sound like this is something that lawyer would write. Yeah. And also because he said it sounded like his friend's writing so that even more so. So it's like he could literally counter sue his friend because that's like that's very illegal to do that. To use the lawyer could sue him for misrepresenting as the lawyer. Right. Right. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I guess for me, I'd almost want to reach out to that lawyer and be like, hey, yeah, I got this letter from you. Is this is this real? It's extremely illegal to do that. And even if it's not the like an actual name of a lawyer to do like a fake lawyer and put on and send a letter, that's also very illegal. So you're friends a moron. And then the other thing, too, is I don't I think it's a safety hazard to be friends with people that are that stupid. So I would agree that I would agree to probably cut that one off. So Opie does respond to a few comments. Comments basically responding to the one I read, too, and just saying, yep, that's what happened. I got carried away in a moment of salivating over Internet justice. I won't say anything to him about this post. And then someone says, your parentheses, probably X friend is an idiot. Hasn't he seen the if it's flooded, forget it adverts the blood police put out every time there's a decent amount of rain? And I haven't. I really. I can't even imagine like seeing this flooded over Riverway and like convincing myself to drive through it. Like, can you even would you even like how much how? No, trust me, I've seen idiots try to drive through that stuff. And it's amazing how many get stuck. It's it's not worth it. No. Yeah, because you're on the East Coast, right? Yeah. Or OK, at least for four seasons. So you've had flash floods that, you know, will cause that. I've seen it. Really? Yeah. I don't like we don't have many causeways in like L.A. or Minnesota. Like I feel like it feels like a Florida thing to like kind of down in the south. I'm not sure. Yeah, I don't know. I'm Googling what a causeway is. I need pictures. I didn't want to say it after I'm like dishing on this guy being a moron. And then I'm like, what's a causeway? It's a big word. So it looks like this. It's basically a road in between like bodies of water. Yeah. And then obviously if it floods, then it's like. Yeah. I didn't know that's what those were called. Yeah. So then you're like, you're just that's nuts. That makes it even crazier. Yeah. Well, this sounds like it was the middle of nowhere. You guys like these are back roads. Like that's a nice causeway with like pavement. This doesn't sound like that. And when I was living in Palm Springs, we did have like kind of, I guess, like riverbeds, like you would drive through the road, but there would be like old dried up riverbeds on either side. And when it would downpour there, those would flood up finally. But like, I never would have driven through it. Like they actually closed them there. So this is crazy to me, but let's get into the update and see how this all turns out. So update. I went to a lawyer my parents had used a few years ago and that they recommended. She took one look at that letter from my friend Aaron's lawyers, and she said she has concerns about it and that she would respond. She contacted his lawyer and my lawyer mailed me to tell me Aaron's lawyers aren't his lawyers at all. Whoa, shocker. But to contact her, if I heard more, otherwise no need for any more action. Aaron had apparently faked up the letter and admitted as much to me yesterday when he finally decided to talk to me. He wants me, to retract my complaint to his lawyers about him using their letterhead. I hadn't complained to them myself. So I did the time honored thing and told him to go pound sand. But it might have rhymed with go eat a bag of dicks. So it sounds like that lawyer did reach out to him to be like, hey, buddy, not good. Not OK. He should tell him to go drive over another flooded causeway. Bad. I mean, he said eat a bag of dicks. I just thought this one would be a little more whatever. Anyway, he already lost one Commodore. Yeah. No, I don't. I don't actually not actually recommending it. Just, you know, play on words, I guess. This is a satisfying update, though. I appreciate you finding this because this is a very, very satisfying update. Yeah. How long does it take you to find it? You said sometimes it takes months. I've had one that took maybe two years to find. Oh, my God. Do you remember what story it was? Yeah, it was. It was a woman wrote in that her boyfriend only wears one shirt. The beef. Where's the beef? I read where's the beef? Two years to find that one. I heard heard about it. I said, I got to read this. Wait, I don't think I had an update when I read it. There is no update. I looked, but it took two years to find the original. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. I just read that on my episode with the basement yard guys. Oh, yeah. Yeah. They loved it. You guys give me a spark notes. I want to know what it is. Matt, you want to do it? Yeah. There's this woman goes to relationships and she wants to know if something's weird. How every date she's gone on with her boyfriend, he wears the same exact shirt. Where's the beef from Wendy's gets better when she goes to his place and she asked him about it. He's got about what was it? Twenty shirts of the same shirt. Uh-huh. He's a cartoon character. And she wanted to know, is this like real? This normal? Yeah. No. Everyone's like, no, it's a little off. I really wish we had an update on that. I really would. I know. I got to make I don't know if I ever made a social. Video for it. I'll make a social video. Maybe maybe again, she's out there. But I did end up ordering some where's the beef shirts and I gifted it to the guy. Oh, that's awesome. So it was really good. That's such a good one. But I just have to say thank you because you make my life, my job so much easier. I also messaged Matt a couple weeks ago now. And I was like, hey, do you remember this story? It was kind of like this, this, this. And you responded back so quick. And you're like, I'm on it. Like, let me let me see. I love it. Within 20 minutes, he sent me the post. Wow. And I'm like, you're just you're so good. And I appreciate you so much. So thank you for coming on and helping us tackle these stories. Thank you for having me on. I really enjoyed this. I know. Maybe maybe around two, we'll give you a full episode. Yeah, let's let's go for it. Okay, good. This is a good test run to make sure you liked it. So I'm really glad you feel good because this is so fun for us. I know. I want to I'm really. Yeah, baby steps. I was going to ask because I know that you were like a little bit nervous about this. How does it feel taking it from the keyboard to the mic? I'm honestly it's I'm not as nervous as when it started. I know it's not that bad. It's a little bit better. You know, I know maybe next time I might be a little bit better because this is the first time I've ever done anything like this. First rodeo. Yeah. And you did great. You did great. And natural. Thank you. Yeah. I really enjoyed it. And everybody was really great on it. Thank you. Yay. Yay. Thank you. Okay, guys. Oh, did he did we lose him? Matt, are you still there? Okay. I was like, damn, I just like. I know the screen. And this episode is brought to you by Revolve. My summer has been jam packed with moments where I just want to look cute. And the best way to do it is to find a good fit, an outfit that makes you feel confident, that feels on trend or reflects your unique style. And Revolve is my go to place to find those. I just went to Europe and basically every single one of my outfits was from Revolve. And I've never, never been complimented more. So whether it's a big night out, a wedding, a summer trip, or you just need something last minute that actually works, Revolve always has it. Go to Revolve.com slash THT to shop our faves and use code THT for 15% off your first order. Fast shipping, easy returns. It just makes everything easier. That's Revolve.com slash THT. You can shop our faves and get 15% off your first order. Offer available for a limited time, so don't miss out. You don't question your character. You question your safety. That's OCD. Breaking the OCD cycle takes effective treatment. Go to NoCD.com to learn more. It helps keep everything moving because family life isn't about the perfect moments. It's about making the most of any moment. Visit your local dealer or Chrysler.com to learn more and schedule a test drive today. Chrysler is a registered trademark of S-C-A-U-S-L-L-C. That blocked. No, but you did so good. This is coming from our very own 2HowTakes subreddit. Hey, family. Hey, guys. It is titled, Advice Needed. Should I give back the office of my co-worker that came back from maternity leave? Probably. Hi, I'm a longtime listener of 2HowTakes. Love the podcast. Hope to have some of y'all's help. Thank you. So I, 23 female, Chloe, am a new grad, and I've been working in an accounting firm for one year, my first job as a newer grad. And I took the office of my 30 female co-worker, let's call her Julia, that was on maternity leave. Back in 2025, I was at the end of my school year and was dropping off some resumes. By chance, Julia was due to go on maternity leave in late July 2025. So I started in late June. I was following Julia everywhere. She showed me everything. When it was time for her to leave, I took her office, making it my first office. Months passed by, and I decided to decorate it. I brought some plants. I put up my diplomas, put up a huge mirror, LED lights under the cabinets. I painted all of the walls, because it was a bit overdue. Wait, what? What? All with the approval of my two bosses, Mike and George. It was now my office. Now the problem is that Julia's back. One of my bosses, Mike, assured me that I would stay in my office, that office, and that Julia knew that she had to take another office because she left. He repeated this message to her multiple times. Even months before she returned. He made it very clear that whoever left their office would lose it. The first day back, Julia came into my office and said, Oh, wow, I'm going to come and get ready in my ex-office every day with this nice mirror you have in my old office. And, ah, I miss my office. Oops, I mean my old office. With this arrogant tone. She seems to think she's better than everyone else, because she had a higher position in another country and is now a bit lower here in Canada. She always has something to say and wants to be liked by everyone, especially the bosses. Julia's been complaining to George, the other boss, about her new office. The other office has smaller windows, but is still very big, and is more secluded with a little hallway, and is more cramped, but in a way that you still have a lot of space. It's a bit weird, but has charm. George says, The person with the most years at the company gets priority, which is Julia. Mike shared everything with me today and wants us to find a solution. I understand she just wants her old office back. On one hand, I want to give it to her since she's returned, but I know she'll constantly remind me if I do, in an arrogant way. On the other hand, I'd love to keep it, but I'd be very uncomfortable working next to her. I don't want to leave my office that I literally rebuilt and upgraded for my comfort, just so she can benefit from it. I also thought of just taking everything and transferring it to the other office myself. I want to be the bigger person and not fight over a silly thing like a workspace. However, I would have been more receptive if Julia had come to me directly and asked, or told me nicely, that she was uncomfortable in her new office. I find it disrespectful that she went behind my back. Honestly, I don't want to work there anymore because of the environment. I feel undervalued and not taken seriously. I don't know if I'm overreacting, but I'm torn. What should I do? Give her office back or keep it. Thank you, Chloe. Edit to add, Julia knew she would not have her office back from the day she left. Like, I can't, like, as a, like, recent grad, my job as a corporate woman was to, not this. I don't know, I don't know, like, I don't know, just not this. Maybe just not rock the boat so much. Yeah, it's like, it's, and I would have, like, I just can't even, especially, like, I mean, I guess if they said, hey, when you leave, like, you won't get your office back, like, I guess if they made it clear and she agreed to that, that does change the whole story. But I also think, like, I don't know, like, even, like, in the job I work now, like, people are very particular about their offices. It's not like you can just take somebody's office who's on maternity leave and then, like, make it into your own little home and paint the walls and, like, Yeah. bushes in there. Bushes. Lauren, they're beautiful plants. Whatever. But, like, and then just be, like, oh, sorry, sucks to suck. Like, and I do think that, you know, she mentioned, like, oh, she might, she thinks she's better than us. I guess, I don't know her attitude, and I know maybe it's, like, maybe it's pretty rough. That can happen, and that's unfortunate. Truly. She could be miserable. She could, yeah, she could be, like, We don't know. She could be pretty rough. But I do think that there's a hierarchy, and it doesn't seem to be, like, that it's, like, computing to you at all that, like, there's, when somebody puts in the amount of work that they do, Yeah. in a corporate job and climb the corporate ladder, it's, like, you would hope that there's the, you know, if you have a baby and you come back, like, you'd hope that there's some respect for all of the work that you've put in. Yeah. Versus somebody who's just starting off, like, because, again, like, when I was fresh out of college and in my corporate job, like, my job was to respect the people who were coaching me and teaching me and giving me a job there and, like, helping me learn. Yeah. How I can be, like, a good Employee. Exactly. Yeah. And so I think that, like, I don't know, unless this is, like, missing, like, a bunch of, Contacts. Yeah, a lot more contacts, then it feels like you didn't have to paint the spot. Like, you decided to paint the spot. Like, you put in the effort to do that, and that wasn't, like, a required thing that you had to do, and now you have to give it up. And honestly, even if it was, like, if I was 22, like, right out of college, my boss was, like, paint my office, I'd be, like, Say no more. Who's buying that paint? Say no more. No, I would. You would? I would. Yeah. I would. I was so, bright eye bushy tail ready to work ready to impress like ready to please them and like I don't know like maybe that's not the thing anymore no but it was when I was and honestly like I'm looking at OP and I'm like I am very I'm very impressed by your ability to stand your ground and like kind of steadfast in your beliefs because if this were me back when I was 23 honestly maybe today at 32 like I wouldn't be able to rock the boat and I would have people pleased my way back down the hallway to the tiny office you know and like maybe I'm just and maybe that's wrong I don't know and I'm and maybe my reaction is off of jealousy that I didn't have that type of way of advocating for myself whenever I was young you bring up a lot of really interesting points though yeah and I think one of them is the fact that maternity leave right this wasn't she quit it feels like discrimination in a way it does like it just feels weird to me it does and it does feel almost like an HR problem that like HR could get involved because I think like obviously pregnancy maternity leave like you're in a different protected class not an HR expert I know we got him out there hop in the comments but this was a planned break it's not she quit it is a planned maternity leave she's not doing this break right she's pushing out a baby taking time to bond with baby like again like there's this expectation she's coming back so why even you know why even put this effort in the office why paint the walls why bring the plants if you have it like she's coming back and I get the boss was like said like julie julia knew yeah the day she left she wouldn't have her office back and that's the part that is tripping me up because if that was something that was reiterated to me even as a young person because again it sounds like that's the hierarchy yeah that's that's julia's boss right yeah who said that so like that's a company owner right so that does like that would be confusing and then like when you're being told that then like you're like wait no I deserve that so I do I do see where op is coming from because at the same time like if you're and it's like a junior employee like your new grad first job julia has years of experience she's probably more involved like you're an associate she's a partner she painted the she painted it so she deserves it someone reimbursed op here I love you op yeah this is tough sisterly love right now yes we love you but like truly it's just like do not rock the boat like julia could actually be one of your biggest allies as a woman in this field with you this could be your mentor like you're a new grad this is a part of the process of like putting in your dues yeah and this is any job whether it's lawyer ot blah blah blah blah like does it feel shitty that you painted yes but you didn't have to do that knowing julia was coming back on maternity leave I get you're getting very mixed signals from the two owners right which is one is saying julia is a priority she wants her office back and should get her office back one is saying no you keep it it's your office love you girl it's mixed signals obviously everyone needs to come to terms with this if this were me how I would proceed going forward I'd give her the office back let me go tuck back in my little corner where I can maybe put on a reality show during lunch or midday have my snack cooler you know blah blah blah and I'd say hey you know if you bought the paint with your own money hey can you reimburse me for the paint then and yeah take your mirror take your plants take all the other shit you put in there definitely because on the flip side that's still your stuff I do want to say like on the flip side scrape the paint off oh yeah with you I'd actually I am so so petty that I would repaint it back to the color was it wouldn't be a cute color that I picked it'd go back to millennial gray but I will also say I could see a side of this that julia also knew she wasn't gonna get the desk back but then came in and saw all these nice modifications and is like I love what you did with the place I'm gonna try to get this back now I don't think so because I mean I maybe this is just a me thing okay but like I would not care about the paint and that's the reality she's not gonna keep all of the plants I mean I don't I feel like op was like I kind of just want to move everything over almost like op was gonna leave the mirror and the plants no but I'll leave your stuff there obviously bring your stuff leave that thing an empty shell yeah I mean that's your stuff you're gonna bring that but like yeah I don't so that's what makes me think I think she just wanted the office I think she just likes the office clearly a hot commodity better view not down a cramped hallway I mean op was like trying to make the other one sound nice but otherwise op would have went to the other office that wasn't occupied you know this office is giving prime central where everyone says hi the fact that she went on maternity leave and she like jumped to it it's like yeah it sounds like it is an office that is better yeah and I just think at the end of the day like that is something that you know you do have to you have to pay your dues a little bit when you're in the corporate world like you really you gotta you gotta grind it out and like this is to be expected as a new grad like you're saying new grad first job like you said it multiple times this is like so it does come with a little of the territory and hey if you feel you're undervalued and you can get a better job with maybe more pay do it then like that could be a fun go to the next ship or maybe maybe the problem with the job is that you're getting two different things that are making making you feel uncomfortable like you have two different owners that are saying opposite things and it's making it so that like the company is not going to be able to do it again and it's making it so that like the company is not a well-oiled machine like yeah you know like well it's like who do you listen to that yeah you want the consistency because otherwise it doesn't feel good naturally so I think if that's if you want to find another job where like the leadership is more aligned and that would be better for your yeah what is it called I'm like trying to think of like your constitution pledge allegiance to the flag no no no like have you never heard like your personal constitution I probably but I was I was looking for like the code you live by okay what makes you feel good okay I'll keep using that one like yeah I pledge allegiance yeah so let's get into some comments though see what everyone else is feeling now because again yes this is just this is just your two big sisters so top comment feeling narwhal 9161 I'm siding with Julia on this one it's messed up that she would lose her office for going on maternity leave that being said you definitely take all of your things and decorations with you she gets the space not your stuff next comment down and actually losing her office because she went on maternity leave would be misogynistic as hell and possibly illegal next one down yeah definitely sounds like this company has opened themselves up to a lawsuit for discrimination someone responds that's stupid no company would put anyone's needs over leaving and unoccupied space just because they are lucky the offices even exist keep that and they'll find a new meeting room and both of them work in a cubie that got down about three times someone goes I just love when people disagree to a pretty reasonable comment and begin it by saying that's stupid essentially being like you should have kept that to yourself yeah yeah essentially but I do think there's a lot to be said there where like it does feel a little discriminatory like kind of like it was maternity leave it wasn't she quit I guess it depends on how the office is they didn't have assigned offices and that's just kind of like where she took place but but then but then you have this girl who completely decorated so clearly like I do want to just make a comment though like again if you want to handle this maturely I would go to the bosses and be like hey like I feel like I'm getting mixed signals from you two who are kind of supposed to be in charge of this because people are being like they're potentially opening themselves up to a lawsuit like they're these two guys who are in this power position being like to these two women one of which coming back from maternity leave being like hey you sort it between you girls and it's like no this is your company yeah quit sending mixed signals and let's just let's sort it pay me back for the paint upgrade my office go hire a painter so I don't have to do it probably not during her work time probably after hours again free labor free paint reimburse me for that and then hire a painter so I can have a nice space because you're kicking me out of mine after kicking Julie out of it and then sending us both mixed signals maybe it's their first day on earth these two little bosses it's their first day get it together guys there's a lot of people that like also just don't know what is legal and not when they run a business and that when I whenever I was working at a company where I would sign up payroll for people in small businesses it was like a that was always so astonishing to me and I was I was young like I was complicated and like yeah but I was young and I was like signing up payroll for like these older men and and I'm telling them like what they're doing is illegal and if somebody ever sued them like slippery slope there is one last comment I'll get into because OP does respond to it it's the only comment that OP responds to and it's not even from the two I take subreddit so OP did post this as well on r slash advice and again same title same body of the post it appears and so someone says quote I took her office you shouldn't have done that she trained you and showed you around and then you took her office knowing it was hers and that she'd be back. The bosses should have assigned you an empty office and now you're making it weird and uncomfortable. Quote, I find it disrespectful that she went behind my back. That's ironic. It's just an office. So move into the other one and let the one who has seniority have her office back. What happens if you take a day off? Will she just move your stuff out and move her own stuff back in? OP responds, yes, she did when I have my day off. She comes in the office and uses everything. And I wasn't even sure if she was coming back at all from her leave. I will say the leave started again. We're July 2026. She's just coming back. This post is only seven days old, week old. Her leave was almost a year. Oh. So don't know if this is the United States. There is no mention of what country this is coming from. Some countries, their standard maternity leave is one year. The U.S. does not have a standardized maternity leave. It could be six weeks. It could be three months. It could be six months. We don't know. So a year. I don't know if that changes anyone's feelings on it. I mean, it's definitely enough to get comfortable and not leave the prime real estate maybe open the whole time. But again, yeah, she's back. Yeah. Time to move. Right. Let us know what you think in the comments. I feel like that one is going to be it could be divisive for people. But OK, one last one for us here. Are you ready for this? Mm hmm. Let me feel the vibe. Vibe check. I'm ready for this. Yeah. Last but not least, this is coming from our slash relationship advice. It is titled I 35 male was caught using AI to write wedding vows and partner 34 female walked out. What do I do? I 35 male recently had a wedding with my partner, 34 female. We've had a stable and happy relationship so far, and I love her more than anything in the world. The problem arose when it came to writing vows. Don't get me wrong. I love many things about my partner, but I couldn't figure out how to put them into tangible vows. I decided to use chat to PT so I could have something well written and expressive to share at the ceremony. The thing about my partner is that she's very confrontational and no nonsense. If something annoys her, she immediately addresses it with no room for backing out. I also know that she's expressed disdain for AI in the past, but I didn't realize how far the hatred could go. I don't know how, but she immediately recognized that the vows were AI. After I finished, she had this angry look and whispered to me, quote, Did you use fucking AI to write that? During the wedding, I was quiet because I couldn't believe she had noticed that, and she was choosing to address it while we were on full display for everyone. She then said that I either speak from the heart or she walks out. Oh my god, no. Keep going. I literally couldn't get any words out. Oh, he's stunned. And she kept her promise and walked back down the aisle, much to all of our friends and family's confusion. Oh, they didn't hear her? She wasn't mic'd up? Okay. She's been ghosting me these past few days, which is atypical for her, and honestly giving me panic attacks. Oh no. Most people agree that calling off a marriage because of AI vows was an overreaction, and that maybe it was a sign that our relationship would have issues, but a few female friends have said that they would have done the same. I'm hurt, and I honestly just needed it to help make the day more special. Is this worth fixing? Honestly, I don't know, because AI aside, I think it's just the fact that she walked out during the, like, right, like when they're about to, yeah, it just, I wonder, sorry, go on. No, and I was just going to say, and then the ghosting too, it's like, to ghost somebody after that, like, obviously, like, again, like, you didn't even go back to the bridal suite and chat. Right, and it's like, do you think that he had these horrible intentions when he did that? And if you do think that, then yeah, like, you guys probably shouldn't get married, because if you think that he was like, malicious, it was malicious, then, you know, and so, and if you don't think it's malicious, then it's like, why are you ghosting somebody who wanted to spend the rest of their lives with you, and they're. Going into panic attacks, like, right after you walked out on them in front of all your friends and family and all of your loved ones, supposed to be the most special day, and again, like. And you spent a lot of money, probably. Exactly, and it's just like, I do understand, like, being really disappointed and really hurt that, like, you were really wanting your partner to, like. Speak from the heart. Speak from the heart and say their own words. Love me, show me why you love me. Right. Vow. I think if you're willing to walk out and ghost your partner after that, that just seems like a really hard, like, uphill battle for a marriage, because I think, again, if you know him well enough, you know he probably was just trying to get. Had maybe good intentions. Yeah, and if you don't think he did, then it might, it's just. Yeah. I understand being hurt and let down while you're there at the altar. Should he have used AI to write his vows? Absolutely not. Absolutely not. Like, buddy, I don't know why you thought that would even be a good idea. Like, that should have came from your heart. And not some paraphrased human computer. Like, that is really shitty. But she confronted him up there. I understand being shocked. I understand being, like, a deer in headlights. But the fact that, like, you were literally ready to say, I'll spend the rest of my life with you, and then she walks out. It is an interesting reaction. And it does beg the question of, like, are you even compatible? Is this worth saving? I don't love AI. I'm very against AI, especially in terms of using it to write your vows. Like, that better come from your heart and our experience, and just be so sentimental and so you. Otherwise, I don't want it. Yeah. So I completely get that. But I don't know if I would have threw away a marriage and a life with someone if there weren't already a shit ton of cracks. Like, there's got to be a lot more going on here. I have a lot of questions with this one. And I'm, again, like, very curious why he even would think this is a good idea. Again, kind of like first day on Earth, buddy. Like, did you think AI would be a good way to write your vows that are supposed to be very sentimental and heartfelt? And I feel like for me and Justin, when we talked about our vows, it was like a demonstration of, like, our relationship and why we mean so much to each other and, like, what we are vowing for our future. Like, I promise to always support you even through your toughest days when you don't even. believe in yourself. Like, I do think it's a really good opportunity to show your love for this person and that, like, I see you. I understand you. ChatGPT doesn't know her. And I fully understand why she's so upset. And I'm very confused why he's, like, kind of, like, surprised by this. But, like, I think, again, like, as you said, AI vows aside, maybe the AI vows aren't, like, really the issue here. But I'm really curious because I do think there's a lot of cracks, as you're saying, there's got to be other issues. But I'm really curious if she told him before the wedding, please don't use AI. I know you love ChatGPT, but, like, please don't use it to write your vows. I'm really curious if this was a conversation before this all went down. And that's why her reaction was so. Was big, yeah. Explosive. Yeah, yeah, it's interesting. And the thing is, like, too, though, like, with AI, it's not, like. I mean, he could have just been, like, tell me what I should say. And he could have just done that. But he could have literally written out, like, how much he loves her and then put it in AI and been, like, can you make this better and better, like, more well-written? And then AI could have taken everything that he still came from his heart and cleaned it up so that he didn't sound like an idiot. Yeah. So it's, like, I mean, I guess, I don't know. There's, like, there's levels. There's tiers to all of this. We do have a few comments from OP. So let's get into the top comments first. I do see some responses from OP, but I just want to see overall what was best. So top comment. I'm skeptical. Most people told you this is an overreaction. Let's see the vows. Most people is just his way of saying ChatGPT told him. Big red box here. That's funny. In vain, I've struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not. be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you. In declaring myself, thus I'm fully aware that I will be going expressly against the wishes of my family, my friends, and I hardly need add my own better judgment. This is. It's a role play. That is not OP. Oh, my God. I was about to faint. That is not OP. That is someone role-playing vows. It did get a decent amount of upvotes and an award. No. The next top comment I see here. Expressive and AI don't go together. She was able to figure it out that it was AI because AI doesn't have the same tone. hone as you. You outsourced how much you care about your partner to a machine and you're upset she didn't like the idea. I want to say this is fake but one glance at LinkedIn proves how AI rots the brain and makes you incapable of critical thinking. Let's get into OP's comments. Wow so everyone thinks that that was a marriage ender? I think everyone's like dude like what were you thinking? Everyone is like very surprised that he would even do this like he would even yeah because it's like what like what were you thinking? Yeah and I do think like there's there's groups to this AI where it's like some people hate it not going to use it and then some people are like it's my best friend I love chat like I chat like and you see I'll see it on people's stories where it's like chat like blah blah blah and they ask chat everything like chat has become their internal monologue and so I don't know where a majority of you guys fall like I I don't use it um but I I surely would not use it for something so meaningful and special as my vows like people frame their vows in their home yeah it's weird but let's see what what OP is saying so someone does say here did you write this with AI too bud come on man you should have been talking from the heart and OP says no I could write this just fine for the vows I don't know where a majority of you guys fall like I don't use it it was different because I wanted them to be perfect and there was a lot I wanted to say that it ended up not being able to say anything so like kind of describing being overwhelmed panic I wrote my vows morning of like I did procrastinate and panic write them but I it did really inspire greatness if I do say so OP says here I didn't realize she would be able to tell right away when I spoke of her disdain for AI people are making it seem like it was a deal breaker I don't know what to do with it I don't know what to do with it I don't know what to do with her that I simply ignored which isn't the case I didn't understand that it meant that much to her and I definitely won't be making the same careless mistake again someone says the thing is this is a slippery slope once you get AI to do something as important as writing your wedding vows you will even more easily be getting AI to reply to your text messages and creating apology messages when you get into arguments which you didn't even write at which point she might as well be in a first time using it to write text and this whole situation scared me off it for good if I can fix things hopefully I won't fall into a slippery slope again someone commented ten dollars she planned the entire wedding OP probably just had this and picking up their tux to remember and couldn't even be bothered to put in any effort OP responds I was involved in the wedding process she always asked for my opinion and we came two decisions together I also paid for half I'm not sorry I'm not going to do it again I'm not going to do it again I'm not going to do it because if I was she would have kicked me to the curb a lot sooner yeah people are like really going in like I mean if his story is what his story is he was so overwhelmed and nervous and like again like he didn't say like I just said write the entire thing for me he said I didn't know how to like exactly express exactly how much I love her and so it's like I don't know people are like acting like he's like the worst human that's ever like and it's like yeah like it was a bad call but like he's not like this malicious yeah they're like it does sound like he was just overwhelmed they're just like they're like i bet you didn't plan the wedding i bet you're just a piece of shit that like is a worthless scum of the earth like i'm just like chill the fuck out on him no jesus and i don't know some people like there are some comments he responds to where people are just like didn't you have an officiant like ours offered to help us both individually with vows op was like i actually thought getting help from an officiant would be less authentic i guess i took it an even worse route without even realizing and it's like i guess like if you look at that versus let me have this other human influence my vows versus like i don't know some thoughtless machine that is my sounding board right that is just i could see how he would get there there's a comment here last one that he responds to someone just asking are you by chance on the spectrum and this is where like i'm really surprised this next part comes from them but they say i can't imagine the tone-deaf carelessness you exhibited without some kind of neuro spicy traits parentheses speaking from an often tone-deaf careless person with odd hd and i'm like i get you can relate but like kind of worded that almost as a disservice to people that also have that i don't know yeah op response this has been brought up before but i don't have a reason to believe it's true i've seen two psychiatrists and none of them had mentioned wanting me to get tested or anything i think i just might be a dumbo he's really like really feeling himself like kind of like oh hurts i mean i guess if everyone wants to hate him i feel bad for him sorry like i don't think that's something to be sorry about it's i mean it's tough like this is a crossroads for a lot of people in life right now like to be honest my dad uses ai sometimes he would send me ai shit and i said don't fucking send me that shit anymore called me up the other day he goes how's it going i go good and he's like i wanted to send you something but i know you don't like ai so i didn't send it to you and i go thank you we have boundaries around it it's a crossroads for a lot of people and again this is just it was his first wedding his first time writing vows first first time on earth first day on earth doing that specific thing yeah as he said he won't make that mistake and he's like i don't again but uh we do get an update let's hear it are you okay are you just feeling so bad for the guy so bad like he's like his his partner just like walked out on him ghosted him he's having panic attacks panic he goes to like the internet to be like am i a bad human and then then everyone's like yeah you're a bad human like i just feel i'm like i mean it like you said it's a new thing for the world like ai is new for the world and it's it's weird it's confusing and like i just yeah he made a mistake but like some grace for the guy yeah it's new i don't know i'm i'm with you again i still think it's crazy he went there but maybe there is some truth to that comment or being like are you you know are you neuro atypical like what's maybe there's just lack of social cues or something like whatever but or like what if he put in a sentence and was like can you make this like sound more eloquent and it was like i love you because you remind me of the sky and you're my favorite person in the entire world and then ai it's like made it like a little bit more like flowy made him sound less like an idiot like i'm really curious yeah i'm really curious what they were because the way that she just clocked it i'm like what were they yeah that's i would i wish he would i wish he could give it to us because then that would give us so much more context like they never get shared and i from scanning the update i don't see it there but let's get into it okay update i honestly wasn't planning to do an update after all because of how humiliating this entire situation has been i didn't want to give any more reason for people to rip me apart but now that my story is posted on a popular youtube channel there probably won't be much of an escape route for me there's no doubt people we know will find it now so i wanted to give the short update everyone has been itching to get i did what i said previously and i told her about the reddit post and how the replies gave me her perspective and that i was sorry she quote posting our business even though our names weren't mentioned and that she couldn't believe i needed online strangers to tell me why i was wrong also apparently my mom was texting her about paying back all the wasted wedding money and she used that against me too which i don't think is fair i have no control over what my family does snacks and flowers didn't do much she refuses to give me another chance even after offering to go to couples counseling so yeah i'm not sure if that's the wedding is never happening again it's over this has been the most horrendous time in my life i've thought about giving up altogether see that's so fucked up meanwhile she's posting about brunch with friends on her social media makes me wonder how she could move on that fast while i'm a wreck people have accused me of not caring about her enough to write my own vows yet the difference in our reactions to splitting up say the reverse i hope you're all happy feel free to rub salt in the wound i'm not coming back to this account this is so depressing it's really i hate this entire story i'm sorry the he's things about giving up completely like it's just like that is devastating the oh my god like i don't like we don't even know the details of like what like what yeah yeah and it's just like yeah like i hope he's out there i hope he like comes across this and i hope he sees like hey there's another side to it and like the only one the fucking lone soldier right here like advocating that he's not a horrible person i don't think he's a horrible person i'm confused why he would think it was a good idea to use it but i understand being overwhelmed but is it that confusing like like when people are so anxious about their vows and then there's this like thing again i was i procrastinated until yeah and then and like they think they're gonna sound like a complete idiot and then they think oh here's this like source that's gonna help me put in my thoughts get like i'm giving the benefit of the doubt i guess i don't know what he yeah i mean he basically said this was like the first and last time i'll use it right and so like puts in like his thoughts like maybe like maybe benefited out like that he was putting his thoughts that were like actually how he feels and then asked ai to make it sound better and then ai made it sound better as ai you know like let's just say that's the case and then it's just like so like the aggressive amount of hate like yes unnecessary of course everyone should write their own vows and like that is definitely like a thing to like put out there to everyone write your own vows we're gonna have ai like it's not gonna go away it's gonna continue to be louder and louder it's gonna be a part of the world it's a part of you know when you go to a fast food restaurant they're using ai they are every company is using ai so like you're you can't fully get away with it even if you're not clicking in it so it's just like it's all around it's really being forced upon us everywhere exactly and so i think that like i think this is a good moment to like be like remember to write your own vows and remember to not get lost in the fact that it's going to be pushed all over the place and still be and still use your own thoughts even if they seem more dumb like it's it's it's good to be authentic it's good to be human to be human to make mistakes it's good to sound stupid like humans make mistakes yeah here you go yeah your life is still worth living exactly you are gonna go on and find someone who i honestly i don't know if she loves him like i'm gonna i'm gonna like i think her reaction again unhealthy relationship unhealthy conflict resolution unhealthy communication you're gonna go on and you're gonna find someone who's amazing and loves you and maybe the next time your vows won't even be hard to write because you have such clarity on that person and you love them so much that it just spills out of you or maybe you sound like an idiot when you say your vows and that's and your and your partner laughs so hard because they love when you sound like an idiot when you try to express your love part of you they love yeah absolutely i am definitely going to send op message in case he happens to ponder on that account i just feel like so heartbroken that he got like dumped at the altar and then everybody is just like yeah you're a piece of shit like i don't it's just like oh my god like yeah and he did he wasn't trying to be awful you know like there's a lot of people that try to be awful no i genuinely think this is one of those human mistakes that just happened and that's the beauty in humanness we are going to make mistakes we're not going to get it right all the time we're not all knowing beings who am i just morgan maybe i was reincarnated maybe i was someone else before but i'm not going to get it right all the time i'm not going to get it right all the time i'm not going to get it right all the time i'm not going to get it right all the time i'm not going to get it right feels like my first time doing this for sure so no i think it's it's good to have grace and i think that is what makes us human and again just just two takes here everyone's gonna see it a different way there's a lot of sides to a dice two sides to a coin for sure that's for sure yeah for sure i know i know that um but yeah you know i just and that's the thing too that i do like want to hear and we're judging anonymous stories um but i do think it's it's tough when we come across when i come across things on the internet even if it's celebrities the way that people are so unforgiving about celebrities making mistakes and people making mistakes in general or like i like i'll see somebody gets like bit by a shark and it's like oh someone was bit by a shark and then the comments are just like well you're an idiot for going like you deserve to die because you went in the shark's land and it's just like can we just like be chill nice to each other and like be human and just like remember to give grace and that like people say stupid things people mess up people make mistakes like people do things they regret like let's just all give each other like a little more grace and give each other a little more love yeah what i think too with reddit remember like potentially a lot of times i would say most times there's a human on the other side of that yeah there's a human on the other side of of that and you know there's unfortunately came across my my page the other day where this fox rehabber actually you know because of comments online and it's just shouldn't be like that no exactly so be kind i think everyone out there today like take this as a reminder of like compliment someone do something nice pay it forward in some way like i just think we're in this world and we're we are creators of the world we want to live in and we want to live in a world where we want to live in a world where we want to live in and i know obviously a lot is out of our control and it can feel paralyzing and overwhelming and just catastrophic most days i've i've really been going through it this week so just a little reminder of like just be kind like someone like smiling at someone complimenting them could make a huge difference a big impact and let you be the person that makes someone's day like how good does that feel so just be nice be kind i also that was beautiful and i also saw something that was like to be a human is to be a hypocrite which is so i love that well it's so funny to me because it's like i used to be like oh hypocrites bother me so much but like i'm probably hypocrite too like we all have contradicted myself week to week yeah and i've noticed it with everybody in the entire world like there's always there's always going to be a moment where like you're judging somebody for something that like you've probably done in a different relationship or like on some capacity it's just like we climbed by the seat of my pants how i feel on a day is gonna yeah yeah totally impact how i act behave what i say yeah so just remember to try to be to be kind to people it's okay to like get angry and bitch about stuff and be mad and like judge people but like but also have those moments to come back down to earth and be like i'm an i'm imperfect too so beautiful love you guys love you guys so much we are also going to be doing more of these stories over on patreon and again like we're gonna i think have more stories where it's like who's first day on youtube who's first day on youtube who's first day on earth is it i like within the story and that's how all of these are kind of intended to it's like whose first day on earth was it yeah is it their first day or you know are they well experienced and maybe it's our first day as we found in the tamarind story yeah with me and the passaggio but this will be again a bonus episode over on patreon patreon i don't do ad for you guys it is all new stories new content it's not repeated anything so head on over there's also a upcoming theme called jump scare you guys are going to see very soon patreon episode for that so come join us over on patreon free stuff too so just come be a part of the family anything else lowen no i just i'm so glad to be here until next time guys bye guys bye this episode is brought to you by sonic summer is heating up so it's a good thing sonic refreshers now come frozen blended icy cold with real fruit and green tea sonic frozen refreshers are the perfect way to cool it down when it gets hot and they come in four delicious flavors strawberry powder and sugar and then the last one is the strawberry powder and sugar powder and sugar passion fruit watermelon peach mango peach and berry citrus and they're the perfect way to reward yourself whether that's finding the last parking spot in the shade or getting a compliment on your form from a workout instructor maybe it's remembering to put on sunscreen before you leave the house whatever it is this summer for all of life's little achievements sip to that with new frozen sonic refreshers live free eat sonic try the new frozen sonic refreshers today order in the sonic app for pickup or delivery or visit your nearest sonic this episode is brought to you by skims can we talk about some good cotton basics for a second the everyday cotton scoop bralette is my staple i wear this running around i wear it under my cute little tank top i love that it doesn't have any underwire and is just so comfortable comfort is what i am prioritizing this summer which is why i love all of the lightweight cotton t-shirts again i'm not overheating when i go outside i can bop around in them and later on pair them with a cute denim skirt or some jeans and be ready for a date night there's nothing better than finding undergarment solutions that fit you fit your life and that is skims they're good simple clothes that are going to end up becoming part of your daily routine and i've never felt more empowered and comfortable in my clothes thanks to skims shop skims cotton and all of my favorite pieces at skims.com after you place your order be sure to let them know i sent you select podcast in the survey and be sure to select my show in the drop down menu.com and i'll see you in the next that follows. Thank you.