#196 - Nick Mullen

Folks, we have an incredible episode coming up with my pal, Nick Mullin, but before we get to it, I just want to let you know, I want to remind you, next week, Uncle Stav comes out on Netflix September 8th, I'm so proud of what I worked really hard on it. Everybody here at Stavvy Baby Enterprise worked very hard for three years of our lives. Please watch it. It would mean the world to me. It is the number one way you can support me. It would mean so much. Please, right now it's on Netflix. Check, you know, whatever, like add it to your list. I don't know. I should have researched what, but just go click on it. It's on the coming soon. Say you're pumped for it. And go see our buddy Nick. He's on the road right now. I'm very excited. My boy is back doing stand up again. So he plugs his dates in the episode, but just enjoy a nice, a nice little episode of Stavvy's world starting right now. The fiber. I am actually welcome. Welcome. Welcome everybody to Stavvy's world, 904, 800 stop. Call in on the visible hotline. We will solve all your problems. You nailed it, dude. Oh, yeah, absolutely. We might have to change where we normally put the over. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, there you go. One a little lower. No, it's not fat. Fat news. We don't do the news. I mean, I guess, I guess we could do fat news. I would love to be the fat news anchor. Yeah. I mean, there's a lot of fat news. We were just talking about breaking news and then the chair just that would be good. The news is the chairs back. The chair is the news that broke. We have our buddy, Nick Mullin on the couch. Hello. He's back on the road, folks. I am. He's got little music caps now. I do. I know. I finally, I want to go and hold enough Irish enough, old and Irish enough. Well, I think it's more like a nerd thing, kind of like you kind of have to be old enough where like I'm not in the tabletop games, but I could be you really could be unfortunately. Yeah. Yeah. That is true. And I don't that one missing aspect is you need the big tiddit at big tiddit fat kind of, you know, maybe 30% 30 B.M. a 35 BMI girlfriend. Absolutely. And then she's just a parent is that's old. Yeah. And then you hang out at the coffee shop. You've got a staff with a jewel. Right. Right. Maybe it's a skull. Yeah. And you give advice to everyone. Right. And it's completely you're the you're like a mage. Yeah. Like a guy that used to be a store in the mall called like Fire and Ice. Sure. Have you ever seen it? Yeah. Well, that that they had it at each not each point white Marshmall. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. And it's and it's just like a dragon made out of basically. It's it's like it's like they got mad at hot topic like commercializing their thing basically. Right. You know what I mean? They're like. Yeah. Well, that's all the cheap stuff. We're the we're at this actual fandom. Yeah. And then I guess probably George are our Martin like he was sort of the highlander of those types of guys. Yeah, absolutely. And so the rest of them. Well, that's the problem. You're not fat enough to be this guy is the problem. I know, but I might close look like I was fat. So I'm like post oz. This guy has to be like skeletal and six four up. Or he asked me that short. No, that's me. Oh, you're trying to combine both. I'm short and skeletal. No, that I hit both. You lose all the aura if you're fucking short and skeletal. You have to be wide as fuck. And yeah, if I had that cap, honestly, dude, if I had that cap and I'm at that fucking I'm at that fire and ice broke, no one's even looking. I've lost so much weight. I've been lying to my girlfriend and adding weight to my weight so that she doesn't feel bad. Because you could wear with like women slacks at this point. Yeah, a woman's business. Yeah. Yeah. Guess I've looked at your body. You're looking alive. I'm the I'm the CEO of fire and ice. Dude, I do think I know I've lost mad weight because I mean, I stopped while I stopped lifting weights and then I was a vegan for like 18 months and then alcoholic for 13 months. So the calm and there was overlap. But basically lost all my muscle mass testosterone dropped. We through the floor in my mid 30s. And then I got a second cat. Okay. And so. So now I see this is like how people try it before they bulk. Before they like this is like the cut. There's not going to be any. But what I'm saying is no, no, you're just trying to get purely fat now. Yeah. I'm going to I'm going to you're becoming George R Mark. No, I did that. I did it already. I did that. I missed that. Yeah, I didn't miss you getting. Well, that's the thing. I lost so much weight. My shirt's got bigger. So people can't really tell because I got a small frame anyways. You do. So petite frame. I do. Yeah. And then shop at the section of the women's store called juniors little misses. June. Do they have a juniors section? They do it. Women's little miss. Isn't there like a junior yet or a junior? Juniors for. Yeah. Juniors for guys. What do they have? Well, there's no there's no like this is my daughter Stephanie junior. She's in the junior section. Yeah. Cause we just I mean, it could be, but we just assume that like no woman will ever do anything good enough that her daughter would be named after. Like the bar is so long. Don't get junior ever. Yeah. There's never going to be a second. They could never in history. Yeah. It's like, Hey, if a woman does something good, that becomes a man's name. Right. Yeah. So like Robin. Where Robin was a lady. But then it cycles back on Robin. The other way, if a man sucks and they get the like Beverly, that used to be a guy's name. Ashley. Ashley Courtney. And then they get dumped over. Well, Courtney, you can still be a jacked black guy. You still be. There's a really just that one. Oh, no, no, no. What happened to Courtney Farrington? Well, Courtney, he's a woman now. That would be nominated. Yeah. Just, you know, my name and so I figured wasn't really my choice. Just every black guy named Courtney to become. Yeah. I guess it's not really up to me. No, but what was I talking about? Oh, yeah. No, I got, I got pretty, I got pretty fat. Well, you didn't. Well, I mean, I wasn't like more Bidley obese, but I mean, I got fat enough that I got my liver was fucked up. Oh, wow. Okay. So that was the motivation. No, that is true. You, I don't think you can handle being obese because you're, you get, you have health problems at this. Oh, yeah. Wait. I just got new glasses, $800 now for, for an eye exam and new frames. Damn. That's how bad inflation is. Do they suck you off at the end too? And then you get a happy ending. No, literally the week after I can't see out of this eye anymore. Yeah. No, I'm kidding, but I can't read out of it anymore. It's not that worse. I'm out. Well, there's no, I mean, it's neurological. You can see, but you can't read. No, it's not like I ate the worst. And I've law, I'm a literary, but you read them. They fucking look like, no, it's tiny script. It's like blurry up close. So I guess I need bifocals in this eye. And then, but no, I reversed my liver's healthy now because I got into running. Yeah, interesting, which was very painful early on. But now I'm like, yeah, I'm, I'm completely amaciated. Yeah. Yeah. Cause I'm not going to run and lift weights. So that's not. No, dude. Well, that's what I'm saying. You've gotten back to zero. Now if you put weight on it's pure fat. It's the opposite of a bulk to keep muscle. Yeah. Maybe. Now you, well, that's what happened. I already, because I was, I was lean and muscular. Then I got, I did vegan plus alcoholic, lost all the muscle, was rail thin. And you're eating with a lot of Oreos, I would guess. Oh, yeah. A lot of that French fries and Oreos. Yeah, my whizz little shit diet and stuff. Hell, yeah. And then coconut ice cream, coconut cream ice cream. Yeah. And then I haven't really put much effort into it. I just kind of like track calories and stuff. And I've slowly lost weight since January. But, yeah, no, not going to, not going to not going to lift weights. I do think I don't even want to get my testosterone. Actually, the doctor wouldn't even let me. He wasn't get a test. Yeah, I was like, should we get it, we should we check that? And he was like, no, no, don't worry about it. Yeah, I was like, okay. You're, you know, you love racking up testing stuff. And he's like, yeah, no, you're too gay. No, no, no, we're, I'm going to hit you on the knee with the hamburger and charge you a million dollars for it. You do get an old, I mean, I had an old ass doctor who was clearly just doing my doctors. A cosh thing. That's, yeah, yeah. Where do you find him? Uh, yeah, yeah, fun or random. Just right outside of the flagrant to suit you. He's like, I have to probably come together going to medicine. Right. He said, I quit and he walked out the door. I'm like, take a look. What's his red mark in my ass? Okay. That's the scope on it. Well, it sounds okay. And then I fart and then he's like bleeding. Really? That happened because in their religion, that is the voice of God. Oh, really? I don't think that's true. I'm going to go ahead and mark my disagreement on the record that I don't think that is true. You're not allowed to hear the voice of God. I don't believe the voice of God. I don't know which one you're claiming he is. But I don't believe me. I farted through a status quo. I'm going to say that. We've knew the God. We've never ate pussy. It's all hands, but it's eight pushes in the hand. That would be kind of fucking awesome, actually. Yeah. There's seven hands. and they're all wiping. - Mm, mm, mm. - It's just interesting, so you get the cleanest hole. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That would be nice, dude. Eight hands, fucking washing you down. I would love to get scrubbed down. - By which one is it? - Is that Vishnu? - I think it's Vishnu. I just would love to get bathed as a grown man. That would be nice. I've seen a lot of stuff my nephews-- - I mean, you can have, you can make that happen. I guess I would like it to be platonic. I guess I would like my dick not to get hard, 'cause if I was bathed now by one of my dick would get hard. - Somebody relayed to me a story of you roasting them, and he's, I don't want to like doxamera. But you know, John Mulaney's, like, I guess he produces stuff for him, his buddy, the Greek guy, taller. - Yeah, of course. - Yeah. - He was telling me he talked to you and he was like, my dream is to have a, like the rotisserie thing. Like the land on the tree thing. - I don't remember what your dream is to have $75. (laughing) 'Cause people do that. They'll say my dream is, and then it's like something completely fucking obtained. - Well, that was the thing. - What you're imagining is you as a different person. - That is true. 'Cause like right now you go to a restaurant supply store, get the fuck in. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Right now, and that was, to me that was me, first of all, he was a Greek brother, and I want, that was me wanting him to understand he could do it right now. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - 'Cause even when I was broke, I was doing fun shit like that. - Yeah. - I would always, I would have shit, I, you know. I was saving, before, like as we were, as I was broke as fuck, I would be like, I would like, set aside money for like, bongs. - Yeah, right. - You know what I mean? - I would have no money. - You would prioritize that. - I would buy like a Wolverine bong. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That was, it was funny. - That was the way I thought when I was like 2021, 'cause it was like any time I had saved up money, speeding ticket. - Car accident. - Yeah. - You know, murder trial. For most sense of time. - Child pornography. - Child pornography. Of course, having to, or if you had, you had ironic, terror bites. - You know, pornography. - You had your laptop. - Yeah. - I was doing research into how horny child pornography could make me. (laughing) - Well, you had that hilarious one. - I'm saying, "Gi-al- porn dot set." - Yeah, and I will never forgive the FBI for scaring me away from renewing it. (laughing) That was like, it was like the fucking, that was so much. - Stars aligned in the worst way that that was up for renewal. The week the FBI came to my house that asked me about material support for ISIS. (laughing) And so I was like, "Oh, cancel, cancel, cancel. "They're mad." - Yeah. - And then they were like, do you know any Muslim people? I'm like, so this isn't about the child pornography? - Wait, this isn't, wait, the FBI is not knocking on my door because of my website child porn dot set. (laughing) It's about my links to Islamic terrorism. - Yeah, yeah. - (laughing) - Fuck man, that's so fucking funny. - Yeah. - And the conceit was folks that, well, it was-- - It's like, well, it's, you know how they got like Al Capone on tax evading. - Of course. - I'm like, "Oh, that's what's gonna take me down." - Just a little dalliance with the fucking, the Mujahadin. - Yeah. - (laughing) - Why did they think you were, you, you. I remember this was, didn't they come to somebody else's house too? What was it, why did the FBI-- - No, they just came to my house. I remember that, it was very funny. That was, I mean, that was when we first started, come town, wasn't it? - Yeah, yeah, well, it was, I mean, you know, everyone knows the story. Nobody knows who I am. - Yeah, nobody knows. None of this audience has any idea where I am. They're like, "That's not George R.R. Martin." (laughing) Like I didn't work in Fire and Ice. (laughing) It was called Fire and Ice, though. Even though George R.R. Martin's books were, weren't they the ballad of ice and fire or something? Like that, I'm sure he just took the name from the store. (laughing) Yeah, it is funny 'cause those guys, you see him, he's fat, he's bearded, and you're like, "Wow, this is some mythical guy." And it's like, it's a fat guy from New Jersey. It's just, it's just something like that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just a guy from New Jersey. - Well, Kirk, that wasn't Italian. - Kirk had that bit about him. When he found out George R.R. Martin was from Bayon. - Oh man. - And he's like, "Do you understand?" He's like, "I'm from Jersey. Do you understand the level of bullying?" That probably went into that guy's life that he had to retire so deep in his mind. - He had to have to retire. - Yeah, he had to retire. - And then they do it. - Okay. - So we start with the Ray Fines and I. - German. - Yeah, right. - And so just to play the bass character, we put them in light. Just one coat of. - They would be playing Sean and Marlon. - I see, I see. So I see. So then they're playing Sean and Marlon playing Black Eyes. - Playing. - Being played by the white guy. White chicks. - Yeah. - Beautiful, beautiful. - Yeah. - I love that. - The first layer is completely transparent. - Okay, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. - And the next one is just the movie white chicks. And then the third layer is. - That's where the magic really happens. - I love that, man. - Exponential acting. - Yeah, dude. - Fuck. - Yeah, so that, you know, I fuck with that. And then I guess I haven't really seen any other specials. White pressures. - Marlon Wands. - All of Marlon Wands also did the slap special. - You know what I think? You need to talk to Netflix about this. - Yeah, hit me up. - They need to go, they need to do cooking specials. Like, there's no, I mean, I'm sure it still exists on TV. But like, imagine like an hour long Justin Wilson special. You know, or like a Paul Prudome special. - Yes. - Or Emerald. - Yes. - I mean, I named two guys that are dead. Emerald might be dead too. - Emerald's still kicking. - Yeah. - But I see what you're saying. - Right. - Maddie Matheson for example. - Right, exactly. Just an hour of a guy cooking. - I would watch the fuck. - I would prefer if they were cation. - Sure. - Yeah. - Okay, yeah. I think Cajun would be nice. I think, I think they should, I think what would be fun to do is they should have infomercials on Netflix that you can watch. Like, remember Jeff Tony? Did you ever, were you a big chef Tony got elders? Did you fuck with Chef Tony? Also, the slapping chop was another one. - I remember slap chop. - But Chef Tony almost had like dinner parties. And he was kind of like a Paul F. Tompkins character of, it was kind of like some comedian doing a fat chef character. - Yeah. - And I literally would watch it. Like, I just liked watching a fat chef. And he would have like a dinner party. And I would be like, waiting for his football to come on. When I skipped church, when I, you know, when my parents told me skip church, when we'd got to the age where I was like, "God's not." - You would skip church to watch cooking shows. - Cooking him for financials. Not just shows. - A literal commercial for shitty copper pans that a fat Italian caricature. I bet you, Chef Tony, wasn't even a real guy. Can you do a little research, Elders? Did you have a favorite information? Were you crushing, it feels like your kids-- - I'm trying to, you know what I used to love? I was gonna bring up a second ago. You ever get into a TV carnage? - No, TV carnage. And I'm trying to remember the name of the guy. And I think he might still do stuff with adult swim. - Okay. - The guy that would put together these like, TV carnage was sort of like found footage fest or whatever, but they, he would do these like, I guess you'd call him like video collages of old, just like from archives of like early 90s, VHS tapes of network television, but it would be infomercials. And then they would all have a theme, and it would cut rapidly between all of them. - I wonder if it's the guys, I feel like Ben's worked with them before. - I would, I would not be surprised. - I wonder if it's a boy Demetri who's done Demetri-- - It's a guy, he's Canadian, I think. - Eric Beckles. - That sounds right. - But adult swim and hot package. - Yeah, yeah. - What the fuck, where about Chef Tony? You fucking piece of shit. - You jump right on fucking Mullins history research. What about mine? With Chef Tony, a real fucking guy. - He began working in Brooklyn at a pizza re at 16. We started tankering with and developing kitchen tools. - Okay. - Are you reading? - The biography on his website. - His website. - He's like the dead ringers of-- - Yeah, I have a TV kitchen. - Oh, yeah, I have a TV. - By 18, he was pitching products for legendary pitchmen, Ron Poppale. How do you say his name? - Oh, oh, the guy who did the like spray in the back. Ron Pawt. How do you spell it? - P-O-P-E-I-L. He's the fucking rotisserie guy. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ron Pawt. I don't know how the fuck he said that name. May he rest in peace? - Yeah, absolutely. - He had a little, he had the little bald spot thing that I never got, but I remember being a fat-- - Fat spray paint. - It's basically spray paint, but I think it worked. I think it works though. Ron Papile would not papai would not fucking steer you wrong bro. - So his pitch man career really took off at 18. So you know, I don't think-- - So Chef Tony's been a pitch man before he was ever a chef. So he's kind of like Andrew Dice Clay's, he's a character. - Something like that. - The character that took him to the greatest heights. Imaginable. Friendly Dice Clay, Madison Square Garden for Chef Tony. - Yeah. - The noon Sunday infomercial slot. That's a good slot 'cause it's before football. You know, you got a lot of people settling in learning-- - So I'm confused. What did he sell? - I just be like, call in to see my dinner. (laughing) - Miracle Blade and world class knives. - The Miracle Blade of course. (laughing) - Miracle Blade, what are you doing? Sound like advertising free advertisement for shitty products right now. - The Turbo Roaster. (laughing) - Excellent. - Slice and shop. - You know, I will say it pisses me off. You didn't have a little bit more of a culinary career. I really, I am kind of pissed that I fell for it. - The only infomercial guy remember like in detail is the gazelle freestyle guy. - Of course. - How many little? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, that fucking-- - Yeah. - Yeah, that awesome. - And then I, you know, I feel like there's absolutely no way we haven't talked about 100% of this before. - Who gives a fuck? (laughing) - I'm casting sucks, man. - It does, yeah, it does. I'm finally free of it. (laughing) And it's like, I come back and it's like, what's been on your mind for the last 18 months? Nothing. - Absolutely nothing. - We can't wait to get these two together. I'm sure they have a deck of five years worth of stuff to talk about. - Literally nothing. You got the chef? - No, he got just the fucking life he got on me. (laughing) - You got everything. - The liver was kind of fucked up for a little bit. That's the only thing that's happened. I read half of a book called Snowcrash, and I told everyone it was great. I stopped paying attention. (laughing) I read the first maybe a hundred pages, and I was like, this is cool. Then I wrote, you know, every book where you get into it and you're like, who the hell is this guy? - I was, yeah, yeah. I did that with the Japanese like, like a-- - You're into Freseta now though. You got that? Did somebody get that for you? - I, Hilary got it, shout out the Hilary and DuHor, who has totally designed the fuck and court. Hilary and court have totally designed our studio and Hilary got some nice Freseta shit. Although, I was all, look, I know you had-- - I'm not, I'm not-- - I'm not in the Freseta. - I'm not gatekeeping, I'm happy to hear it. - But I love Freseta, I mean, that is just exactly, it's like action movies, if action movies were painted. - Oh yeah. - And that's why I fucking love them. They're jacked, the ladies have huge tits. You like to imagine yourself as a boy, like we've talked in the past about how I really thought I was, as a little kid, I thought I was sexy. I thought I was, I legit thought I was John Stamos' as a little kid. The flip side, when you're feeling dangerous though, when you're feeling like a badass, you feel like you're in a Freseta. - I told my girlfriend she laughed in my face. I had this recurring fantasy. (laughs) This is good. - When I was in like second or third grade, that I would like imagine like the street I grew up on, and it's me and like five kids from school, we all have leather jackets, and we walk down the street, and we're twirling to get, just leather cap. - Dude, I was just, I know juggling, we're twirling chains, I'm in the front, we're in a V formation, and we're five. - 'Cause I love, you know why that's totally true? - None of those guys were friends with me in school. (laughs) - You know what's funny? Yours is a little fucking more pathetic. I came up with just, like, not real guy, like just out of central casting tough guys. - Right, yeah. - And then people are gonna be like, "Oh, I hope those five-year-olds don't have gay sex with me." (laughs) - Five-year-olds, walking around, and then it wouldn't even be nighttime. It would be like two p.m. - During the day. - I couldn't even imagine we're like a dangerous nighttime. - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. - We're just kinda casually twirling our chains. - Well, you know why that's absolutely true? It's because the V is also taken from-- - A bird. - No, no, from the moot, from the mighty ducks. So it's like a child's, it's like a child's a malgum of like bullshit. For me, it was like, I thought that way, and then hook, I loved hook, and so to me, I was like, I'm one of the fucking lost boys. - Have you ever seen the Korean version of that movie? - No, I have not, I'm gonna claim it's real so that you weren't making a joke, and we're gonna move on before you tell me what the title is. Anyway. - Yeah, yeah. - Well, his name's still Peter Pan. - I'm sorry. - Like I said, I haven't seen it. I'll have to check it out, but then we'll move on. But the lost, but Rufio, of course, you wanted to be Rufio. But then, yes, there was something about that classic greaser. Maybe it was newsies, maybe it was, which is, you know, I don't know what it was. Literally, it was like, in my head, you know, it was like Rob Halford, you know. Like my ass completely exposed. (laughing) - You just just studied. - Shout out to Rob Halford, man. It's so awesome that metal is just gay 'cause one guy happened to be so fucking gay. And before they realized it, they're like, whoa, this is a cool way to dress. I got into fantasy art 'cause I started talking to a drag queen that I made friends with on Facebook, like 15 years ago. - Hell yeah. - You would do this like crazy makeup. - That's so sick. - And then yeah, we started talking about metal and fantasy art. - Awesome. - It's like, yeah, it's gay, it's funny, and it's dangerous. - It's literally gay and funny. It's like everyone is so ripped. - Yeah. - And it's like everyone is so beautiful, but it's not quite sexual. - Yeah. - It's like almost beyond, you know, which is almost like gay guys have sort of like moved past actual sex. - Yeah. - You know, we're just worshipping each other's bodies and shit like that. - Yeah, I have a huge, I got it in Woodstock. I have a huge Tom of Finland coffee table book. - And that one's a masterpiece, prize possession. - That's so fucking awesome. - Yeah. - Your girlfriend's like, put it, my parents are coming where I don't care. It stays on the coffee table. - Oh no, and my dad came and stayed and we made him look at it. And he was like all upset for shelter. You have to look at this gay art, dad. (laughing) - Oh, you have to stay on the streets. (laughing) - Yeah, I was gonna make it myself, but I wanted like a 1970 style, like kids lunch box with the matching thermos, but Tom of Finland. - Awesome. (laughing) - I could have that on the shelf. - This is big ass nipples. - Yeah. - You could make a water bottle where it is, like a guy's protruding comets. - The thermos would be the hard part. The box is just a sticker. - The box is easy. - Yeah. - Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Would you wanna do some design where it's black? It is a literal black and white nipple you're sucking on. - On the thermos? - Esthetically, I would like it to be like the 1980s. - I know what you mean. It's a completely different aesthetic. - Thermos and lunch box combo, rather than like a novelty cup or something. - Right. - When I'm talking about something. - Not something you'd get at regal cinemas when you're going to see the Tom of Finland movie. - The big nipple, so you could suck on it. - I was just in Atlanta last weekend and I went to go, you know, there's a regal right next to the hotel. So I was like, maybe I'll go see a movie. And then I didn't because Spider-Man is two and a half hours long, which is like, what the fuck are we doing here? - Give me a nice two. - Call your family. - Give me a nice two hours. - Not even to its Spider-Man. It should be 50 minutes long. (laughing) - He's one of us three episodes of a cartoon. - I don't need two and a half hours of Spider-Man. - I agree. - He's a man, he's a spider, that's 10 minutes. - That's okay, so I'm back. - He's got a girlfriend, that's 20 minutes. If he gets pussy from her, she'll die. 10 more minutes. - Just setting that up, yeah. - Grandma dies, whatever on, fuck me. - Yeah. - On May, it's not an ordinary story. - Well, what about fighting the bad guy? How many fights do you want in a Spider-Man movie? - You just tie him up and bite him. (laughing) Five minutes. (laughing) - Just Spider-Man. - Just tie up and bite. - Yeah. - His villains. - You make a web outside of his house and then he walks out. - Oh, and you suck him from his life for slowly. - Yeah, right, yeah, like a Spider-Man. That would be fucking cool, Spider-Man did shit like that. - Yeah. Does it, yeah, apparently he's in Dye, isn't Mary Jane or some shit? They've messed with the story, were you ever a Spider-Man guy? - I mean, I like the cartoon. - The cartoon was fun. - I don't remember the cartoon, but the original, or like, the Spider-Man kind of set the Toby McGuire. - Yeah, the first Spider-Man movie was the reason, 'cause you remember in the '90s, they tried to make all of those comic book movies and they didn't really work. - Well, they had, they felt almost like super low budget. I remember seeing a Captain America and it was just like, it was like a guy punching people. - I mean, the big ones I remember were, I mean, obviously Dick Tracy, and then the phantom, the shadow, what were the other, I mean, I guess the mask. - Well, those were all post Batman. - Post Tim Burton. - Tim Burton, man. - Yeah, so they were like, oh, maybe it's comic books, not realizing it's just fucking super him. - Yeah, but the Spider-Man one was like, oh, this could be for adults who are mentally infeasible. (laughing) - Now the first one was good. - It was good, but I mean, it's in the Spider-Man. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. - Yeah, I agree with you. Maybe they should have put more tits in those, you know? That's a big problem. There's never any like, was there a single superhero movie with tits in it? I don't think so. And that seems to be like a real big miss. If you're gonna make these adult themes, right? If these are gonna be for fucking adults. Like an 80s action movie, you at least get like one pair of tits for a second. - The Starship Troopers count? - I don't know that's not a comic book, but there's tits in there. - There's a lot of tits in that. - Yeah, and it's close. - That is good. And everyone cast in that does look like pornography actors. - I do like. - Casper, which is named Casper? The main guy looks like a gay porn actor. - Devon Sawwa. - No, that's not him, is it? - In Casper? - No, no, no. The guy's name is Casper. - Oh. - I think in it. - Right, the Starship Troopers. Jesus Christ. - That doesn't make sense. - Aren't they all from Argentina? - I think the guy's real name is Casper. - No. - But maybe I've completely made that up. - Casper Robert Van Dien. - Yeah, dude, I fucked your, wait for real. - I don't know. - When he's at the character of the fucking actor. - That's the guy. - Yeah, the real guy's name is Casper. Kind of a nice pull. I don't know where I picked that up from. I don't know where I remember Casper is fucking. - Well, 'cause you had a crush on him. - No. - The only thing you remember, you're like, "Yeah, I guess there was tits in that movie, but Casper." - The Casper, I'm sorry. Do you think I get horny to the name of the guy? - The guy who's have a crush on him? - Yeah, he can slip into my bedroom at night, like a ghost. He can come through the wall. - I don't want the real guy named Casper to slip through my walls and pack my house. - Casper, the friend's with Benefit's slippers. - No, I like the chicks in that movie. I like that you saw what's her face as a tits. It was Charlie Sheen's wife. - Yeah, Denise Richard. - Denise Richard shows her tits. And what you like about her is the part of her last name that doesn't have the S on it. - Richard. - Which could colloquially be named Dick. Is that what you mean? - Yes. - Yes. - So you think the two people I get horny for, are starship troopers. - Denise Penises. (laughing) - No, no one said that. (laughing) - No one said that. - So, okay. (laughing) - Well, I hate the first name. - You're in the movie here. - But the second part of the name sounds awesome. - Now there's come all over the back of the head of the lady in front of you. - What the fuck? (laughing) - You're coming all over the room. - Denise Penises. - When I read the name. (laughing) - It doesn't say penises at all. (laughing) - No. - Just staying for after the credits to see if any of the guys are naked in the outtakes. - You know it's crazy. Not only is that not what I do, that's actually what you do. - No. - That's actually what you do. - No, yeah. - We already established. I go to the movies. I asked the 17 year old man the counter. What's the runtime on that? - Right, right, right. - And then they have to Google it on their phone and tell me which I could do myself. - Right. - No, no, you have to let them know. - And then I go, "That's too long." And I make it like as if it's their fault. (laughing) - That's what happens when you start wearing that hat. - Yeah. - I went to regal and they've got like a super trooper's too, novelty cup. - Really? - Yeah, but it's got like a mustache and sunglasses and a hat. It's like, I don't even, it's not. I've made everything, yeah, unruly. - Yeah, right. - They're show pieces. - It's unruly, unwieldy. - Unwieldy fucking popcorn buckets. - Yeah. - It's like the Odyssey one was a Trojan horse. It's like, who the fuck is opening up the horse to eat fucking popcorn? - Yeah. - Just give me a fucking bucket. - Do you see the Odyssey? - I haven't seen it yet. I'm waiting to see it. Actually, I need to fucking, I need to just beg and see if somebody will just give me a ticket to 70 millimeter IMAX. 'Cause I've been waiting to see it that I shot the special, which comes out next week, by the way, folks. And go see Nick, the whole point of this is he's on tour. - Well, that's not the whole point. - It's true, it's true. But I do want to get the word out. Go see Nick, you're all over the fucking place. - I am, so, I don't know when this comes out, but next it's Orlando. - I think at the end of August. - Okay, so none, forget it. And I don't even remember what the schedule is for September. - He will figure it out. - Yeah, fuck it, put it. - It's Nick. - Philly, Nick Bowen dot gay dot shows. - That's it. - Yeah, Philly, Albany, Syracuse. - Rally, Washington DC, Indianapolis. - Beautiful. - Fort Worth, Austin, Buffalo, all in October in November. - Look at that. - Oh, and September too, sorry. Philly, Syracuse, Albany, Pittsburgh. - Yeah. - Lumbassincy. - Excellent. - Yes. - Go see Nicholas on tour. It's not an excuse to hook up with guys on the road away from his girlfriend. That's not why he's doing it. - Yeah. - That's not it. If you're a guy who looks like Casper, who Nick has a crush on him, can you cut that part? Let's cut there and then we'll start over. This is a way for me to hook up with guys on the road. (laughing) The who doesn't really care about comedy. - Yeah. - The actually an excuse to be a closet at homosexual, a practicing closet at homosexual. 'Cause what is it really being a closet at homosexual if you're not having sneaky gay sex? To be a closet, don't you think? - That's what it is by definition, yeah. - But if you just don't have sex, are you even closeted at the time? - I don't know. Do you think we're ever gonna get to a point where it's not even like a different thing to be gay? There's just gay sex and then you're just a guy? - I think so at some point. 'Cause you see it with, you know where you start to see it with like Greek people. (laughing) - No, no. (laughing) - Yes, in ancient Greece, it had come onto this. Actually, that's an example of society where gayness went out of control. And like Sparta, it's so fucking funny. Those guys literally just fuck each other's asses. And then they kind of kept their women in like a pen like cows. And you would, every once in a while, you'd be like, (gasps) You have to go fuck my wife to have an heir. - That's the thing where like, and it might be true, so I don't know. But like we're like conservatives will blame like historical societal collapses on like, oh it's 'cause they let people have gay sex. - Right. - There wasn't anything else like a war. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - They made coins. - The wrong way. - Yeah, jeans. - There wasn't any other thing that happened. 'Cause you look at it now and like, you know, America is cooked, we're done. - For sure. - We're done. - For sure. - And but we are also like, you can, you know, we're inventing new types of gay. - Right. - But there isn't a one-to-one relationship between that and like, starting a stupid war with Iran. - Of course. - You know? - Well I think it's just, - But in a thousand years people are gonna be like, they were letting men play women's sports. - Right, that's right. - They're like really didn't have anything to do with the Jews? - Some of them. - I mean, well, some people will say that, but they'll get fired. - Of course, of course, yes, yes. I think, I think like, the more a society gets good, the more you're allowed to, you have time to figure out how gay you are. Like, when you're just in the fields all day, 12 hours, you either think, you're either thinking about-- - Yeah, but they're fucking out in those fields. You're out of your fucking mind if you think those guys weren't. - Well, they were doing it just a purely blow off steam amongst each other. - Yeah. - But they didn't even, it didn't-- - That's how they made the steam. Everything was steam powered back. - The steam engine? - Yeah. - It's powered on the train. - That's where the term running a train comes from is actually, there was 10 guys in the, the two parties. - The cheapest form of labor was Chinese guys having gay sex on train. - The two parties of an old time, the train is filled with guys fucking each other. - Shuffling like, winks into a furnace. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - And the steam. - And the steam, the steam that came off of them. Yeah. I was in the steam room at the lifetime gym in Atlanta. There was only one Indian guy in there, completely naked. And then sitting in a way you shouldn't sit while naked, which was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like crossing his legs. - Crossing his legs. - Highlights. - Yeah, but it was balls. - And they're spilling out. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And then it's like Fouca's draping in between his legs. And, you know, I'm like, all right. And then I was in there and then I go to leave. And he's like, my friend Soda, can you please press the button? And just the way he said it, I was like, there's no way I'm pressing it. (laughing) You're gonna have to uncross your legs, get up, press button on your own. - Yeah, you cannot show me that much of your ass hole. - You know, so ask me to press it. - Expect me to re-steam the room. - Yeah. - Not happening though. - Yeah. - I know, dude, I went to, I was in a sauna and a guy was just like laying kind of, and it was not looking to do gay shit. It was just the guy who was in the sauna for clearly. He got annoyed when anybody else would use the sauna pretending it's like his, and he literally just sprawled and his dick, he was on the second level and his dick was just right at I.I. - Yeah, that's a good one. - You couldn't, and it was like the center of the room was like how the fucking, the Sistine Chapel, it's got that vanishing point. - Yeah, at the beginning. - And everything, uh? - There is a penis in the middle of it. - Yeah, and everything kind of tracks from there. - And then a guy. - This trying to touch it. (laughing) - This guy's cock was the focal point of the level of the sauna and he was a weird Dutch guy and then a lady came in and she got naked in like a aggressive European thing. - Where, where was this? - This was in Amsterdam. - Oh, okay. - 'Cause the Saunas are not co-ed anywhere. - Which I will, I like that, it was a little starship trooper vibes in Amsterdam where it's like look, take your tits, take your cock out. We're just people, no one's fucking. - Well, now I go back, 'cause that's the other thing. They say, oh, Europe's collapsing 'cause they're living in all these immigrants, but then Europe's doing stuff like that. And it's like, you know, this sauna is, you're in there to get your heat shock proteins. - Right. - Not the- - Not to see tits. - Yeah, or what I'm saying is it's kind of nice 'cause I didn't even register them as tits. I was there just to get the heat. She was just naked in a way that was like all business. - Yeah. I kind of respected, I was like, huh. I don't even want, my dick isn't even thinking about getting hard. - Absolutely. Home of Anne Frank. - Really? - I wonder if they had a song in there. You ever see how big the secret Annex was? - All right. - No, I mean-- - Blur out, blur out what he did with his hands. - I mean, it's not, first of all, not much of a fucking secret, obviously. - Right. - She got got, yes. - Yeah, right. And then also in Annex, it was like, it was like a five story brown stuff. - Oh wow. - Didn't they read it and you're thinking like, oh, it's a radic, that you're in. No, it's a whole other building behind the building. - I never read it because I was too bummed after reading like a couple other Holocaust things. And I was like, I think I got it. I think between night and mouse. I'm good. - Night mouse. - Night, night, night, night mouse. (laughs) She read a comic book called Night Mouse. (laughs) - That would be fucking awesome. - Yeah. - Honestly, a comic book where, an inglorious bastard's version of mouse, where the mouse becomes night mouse and he kills all the fucking Nazi cats. That would be fucking awesome. - I like when they-- - Isn't that what five-o goes west is? - Kai and I love five-o goes west. Does he kill Nazis in that? I don't know. - I think that's what they, isn't there an original five-o that was like that? - Oh, that's pretty fucking sick. - And then American tale is the sequel? - Uh-huh. - Oh yeah, 'cause they come from Europe or whatever. - When I got fat and my hair was a little bit longer and I had mutton chops, I looked like tiger from, I looked exactly like tiger from five-o goes west. - Dude, mun jobs fat with that hat would be awesome, dude. - Yeah. No, that was-- - It's a shame you'll never fully get fat as shit 'cause of your body dysorfic, 'cause you would make a great fat guy. - I don't have body dysmorphia. I just, I never really had my sights on gaining two or 300 pounds. (laughs) - No, no, it's your disorder, it's your disorder that keeps you this unhealthy weight. (laughs) - No, it was kind of nice that the fucking governor went off like when I was just getting, 'cause if I had gotten any fatter than it would have been, that would have been it. It would have been more, you know? I'm like middle-aged now, you're not gonna-- - Oh yeah. - No, but I-- - And the damage is done, like I'm in shape now, but I look like a fucking, you know. - See, this is the body dysmorphia, you look fine. - Well, I'm just, I'm kinda, just, I'm like my body looks very tired. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I think you could snap back into it fast. If you wanted-- - I just don't care, too. - That's what I mean. It's like, all that stuff goes away. You get old enough, and then it's your joints. - You're sort of resigned to where you are, is that what you're saying? - Well, it's like, what's the fucking point? I'm gonna be dead before I know it. - Yeah. - Even if I live healthy, it's like, you know, I can't, where the fuck, how the fuck am I 40 years old? - You got another 40 in you, though? - Yeah, but that's gonna go by like that. - Yeah, you're right, you know? - You're right. - I just gotta like-- - And it's gonna be worse every year, it's gonna be worse. - Right, I mean, but I got like, I got five more iPhones in me. (laughing) - Oh, don't. - It's like, that's it. - 10 years. (laughing) - That's not 10 years. You hold, you get an iPhone every two years? - I think that's pretty standard. - That's crazy. - Let's say three. That's 12 years or whatever, 15? - I don't, I go until they're like, they don't, you can't get the, you know, the upgrade. - I see, I see. - The new, the new, you still got the fucking bullshit? - I have a 15 now, but that's because I had like a 10 or something before. - Okay, all right, all right. - I'll wait a while. (laughing) I'm gonna hang on to my MacBook forever, that thing's great. The MacBook Air. - I like a MacBook Air brother. - Yeah. - I do need a new fuck, I need a nice new fucking laptop. I've solid my, here's how fucking lazy I am. I don't wanna, I wanna home laptop in an office laptop. - I do that. - Yeah, so at the office, I use like a web client or something. The office has nothing in it. - Just writing. - Yeah, that's it. - I love that. - And then if I ever start fucking around, I leave. So that place is like just for work. - Fuck dude, would it be to be a fucking typewriter guy with that little hat? - 100%, absolutely not. (laughing) - Is it gonna typewriter in a little fight? - Do you know where he has the pipe? - Do you know? - Do you know what I'm gonna blur his name? - He's fine, but then he lived with a friend of ours. Do you know him? - I don't think so. - Yeah, but he lived with a friend of ours and there were roommates and the roommate got a typewriter and he would take videos like recording the sound of the typewriter and his room and send it to everyone. (laughing) - That makes fun of him. - Yeah, I mean, it's ridiculous to use a fucking typewriter. - You can use a fucking typewriter. And it slows you down too. - Yeah. - They're like not ergonomic. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wanna fucking, yeah, I wanna a little fucking, to write my, to write my, the white clumps screenplay that I'm trying to get off the ground. I wanna get the white clumps, I wanna do. - Yeah, and it's called, the subtitle is, "Look what they found on my bloodboard." (laughing) But what did the doctor found on the stuff's bloodboard? - Yeah, maybe a fat camp movie. I got some fucking ideas. - Heavy weights is masterpiece. - So good. It's so fucking good. What about a reboot? - I actually, yeah. I would love to write the sequel to fuck. The reboot to heavy weights. Tony Perkus, I'm Tony, but you know what, I'm gonna save this. Actually, it's too good to fucking put over the air. - Yeah. - Just to write a sequel to a movie, you don't have the rights to do it at all. - I have the rights to do it at all. (laughing) - And so this time, you see his cock. (laughing) Just something. - It's got Denise Richards in it. But guess what? It's a guy named Richard Denise. (laughing) He plays Denise Richards, and we give him fake tips. (laughing) Yeah, it's kind of like, it meshes up the starship troopers and heavy weights universe. We're at the heavy weight camp. The spaceship comes down, and all the fucking girls suck the little faggy it's cocks. And it's kind of written from the position of me when I was 13, where I was like, this would be awesome. - Yeah. - If a spaceship came down and Denise Richards sucked my dick. Why don't we ever see that kind of, we just watched, I watched Jason, Jason 10, Friday 13th 10. - Oh, yeah. - And he's like on a spaceship on that one. - Mm-hmm. - And that was really fucking stupid and fun, 'cause it was just like a complete shitty Star Wars ripoff. And then Jason just starts killing people. It's like, yeah, why don't we blending, why are we blending genre like this? - Are there any serial killers in Star Wars? I never watched the, what's the, the good one's the Andor. But yeah, I got, I saw that button on there, and I'm like, I gotta press that button. What would you, would you only watch Star Wars shit on Disney Plus? Would you watch it? - I don't know what else is on there. I mean, I would probably only be to watch Andor. - Yeah. - Yeah. - No fucking little bit. - 'Cause I really liked them. And everyone would make fun of me for it, but I liked that Rogue One movie. - Rogue One was fucking good. - Yeah. - That's the only Star Wars movie I like. - Yeah, 'cause it's like, they do die. It's the only one where it's like-- - Yeah, right. The rest of them are bullshit. - Yeah, we're gonna start getting moved. Like, Andor was basically like, what if a good show happened in Star Wars? - Yeah. - But then why don't we have like Star Wars SVU where it's a bunch of like alien rapers? - Or a serial killer, yeah. - Yeah, that'll be good. - Yeah. - That'll be fucking good. A bunch of tentacles and shit like that. But you know, it is funny now everybody has to have thoughts and support them and shit like that. It's like, I'm not doing that. I'm not debating anybody. - Yeah, you don't. And then also comedians, you don't really like, things don't really work out until your brain is already not really working. - Yeah, that's true, you know. You kind of hope it happens like the last, the last like two months that your brain's working. - Yeah. And then you just hopefully can rest on your rules. - And with AI, it's like we're just not even gonna need a brain pretty soon. - Are you plugging in? - Oh yeah. Literally everything I have. Like I don't make any of my own food. I don't make any of my own food. So I go to fucking, you're gonna have a gondom, aren't you dude? - I basically do, 'cause it's now just in the Google search. You know, I haven't made my smoothies for me. - You have AI, make your smoothies? - Yeah, I'm like, tell me what to put in this. Tell me what the. - They're like more prep. - I go to Apple Health and I screenshot what nutrition that I've gotten. And then I'm like, fixes. And it's like you need to eat a Brazil nut and some chia seeds. - You're like, yes. - What the fuck is that? - Yeah. - Show me a picture. I'm in the grocery store. I take a picture. I'm like, what the fuck? Tell me where to go in the grocery store. - That's fucking awesome, dude. - You're just gonna have like a fucking GoPro from your head and be conscious. - I take a picture of the checkout. I'm like, how much do I owe? - Yeah. - And then it's like, take this many dollars and coins out. And then I pull out my change purse. Like a guy who lives in a care facility. - It looks like you had a traumatic brain injury in there. - Yeah. - Just be patient with it. - I did have a traumatic brain injury. - Yes, what was that? - Being 40 years old. - Just life. - This is all a traumatic brain injury. - So you're ready to give into the fucking robots, huh? - It's not up to me. It's not up to me. I don't feel like I have any control over anything. If that's what you say. In the same way, I don't have any control over the surveillance state. If fucking personal privacy is not a value that we have and not something that I'm afforded, well, I don't have a gun. (laughing) And if I did, I mean, I would imagine if I went. I would get shot by a sniper. - Right. - There's nothing I can do about it. - Right. - Living a fucking prison. - Right. - If they put. If I was in prison and they're like, everybody gets a Roomba. Am I going to like not use the Roomba? Because I'm like, oh, well, that takes away one of the trustee's jobs. I'm being raped every day. (laughing) What the fuck do I care? So you're you want to make you're basically in let me make my cell as comfortable as possible mode I guess let me make it. Yeah, they're like all the data centers are using up all the water. I'm sure they are I'm sure they are But would you be for or against bombing a data center for example? I would think it was pretty funny if it happened But I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna be the one Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, at least you would think it's funny. Yeah, no like there's two ways to be blackpilled You can I mean actually there's only one way right and I don't think people people think they're blackpilled But then they're still secret leaders showing signs of hope. They're just cynical and they're dissenters and so they're not participating in any of these things and it's like Well, you might just what you might as fucking well. What does it matter? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Who gives a shit fucking cares? Yeah, right I just think most of it is gay like I think every most AI thing sucks that I see I mean, I will give you sometimes the like The impressions are pretty good like it is funny on a pure like Dumb level to hear like you know, for example Joe Biden talking about smoking kush or whatever the fuck like that kind of shit is funny, but I thought I thought I thought I'd doctor's appointment, but it's tomorrow My doctor's calling me Like fuck fuck did I miss another back appointment? Yeah, they're like Google Gemini forwarded your scale data Yeah, your microphone is probably listening to you that is true. They're making doctors appointments on your behalf Yeah, I don't know man. I still would you have an AI girlfriend? No, no, okay. Yeah, that's too far. Okay, respect Yeah, what if it was a fucking perfect robot? With an awesome robot. No, it's it's it's just for outsourcing the shit that I don't even want to fucking think about I don't want to waste any more time. I don't want to I mean, it's literally a Google search could do it But it's like I said it's in the Google search now. It's all Google search Am I getting enough fucking potassium? And then it'll that Gemini will tell you well typically people want this my all right I'm not reading that is this enough No, it's not my brain sharp. Yeah to watch for example Sentinel Sentinel's a good shot What are you using your brain for would be my great question to you that you can't just search how much potassium you need but I do search it and then the AI is like Allow me to If I may have this dance If I make a step in here. Yeah, yeah, all right, respect man. I understand and look, you know We're we're progressive guys. Of course. I there's a whole slew of things that on principle you're supposed to not like I Get it. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not a fucking accolade of AI, but if if if there was like if you told me that the toilet canal wipe your ass You're not gonna stop and I started doing that. Yeah, and then you're like, oh well that but see that's When then you do that it means that Something bad, I you know, I just somebody has to drink the shit water Yeah, every time the toilet wipes your ass it water boards latino family. Yeah, I mean the big problem with it You remember Ed Zitron sure. Yeah, so he's got a whole newsletter now And he's like doing a big short thing on like the financing model for all of this stuff It does feel like it can't work. It does feel like it's fake. Yeah, it is I mean he can explain in detail Shout out Ed Zitron and if you want to check. Yeah, his newsletter be prepared every article is something like 20,000 words Which I hope he's not insulted by me It's it's fine. I'm prepared. He works hard. He works very hard. They're very long articles. I was joking privately There's sort of like my dick the article. Yeah, right the same length as my dick. Yeah, 20,000 words Small tiny Miniscule Even if the words describe small. Yeah, the amount is big. There's 20,000 words that can describe how small Yeah, it's all about the amount of words not what the words are. It's a bit It's a bit. Those are not work. Yeah, I put this right my penis. Just it's a bit He chatted like the it's a bit Come suck this it's a bitsy prickly. Yeah, yeah, yeah But yeah, no, I understand people get mad at you for using the and every and everybody's using it come on your Google stuff It's right there. I'm not I legit. I'm not using it mostly out of like I don't know not wanting to learning you thing from being completely honest Oh, there's nothing to learn. It's literally just Google search and then it pops I mean you use a phone You see how this does all the time I get mad at him because I'm like, are you googling? Are you doing the AI overview and he just every time goes against my wishes and He doesn't scroll down even one second. The banter is too rapid fire on the show. I got to You're all you always have it ready to go God forbid we wait four more seconds already two minutes fucking late on what we talked about Anyway, whatever fuck you elders It's good to for I think there'll be a bug in my apartment. I'll be like what the hell is this bug? Mm-hmm, and then we like it says so I'm like, well, should I squish it or not? It says don't squish that one. I'm gonna go all right That's like awesome. Yeah, you yeah, you got you got Gemini to thank for that one Mr. Bug You live another day. I literally I did I was out running and There was a worm on the sidewalk and I picked it up because I was hot out sure and I was like, what should I do with this worm? And I was like, can I just What did the Google tell you? What did the AI tell you to do man find the pants of grass with some shade? Good thing Look that up you fucking idiot. Well, I didn't know I mean because my concern is that He's like halfway through the sidewalk. There's dead worms everywhere I'm like is he trying to get to the other side of the sidewalk because you know what's going on with this worm? And it's like no, just put it back in the shade. It got there. It got stuck right, you know, I'm like, okay, that makes sense I agree. I just didn't think you needed fucking Gemini to win if that didn't exist I know myself. I would have picked the worm up. I know now I wouldn't have squished it I would have picked it up. I would have put it in the grass. I would have walked two blocks I would have gone that worm was trying to get across the sidewalk. I would have walked back I would have found the worm put it back on the side. Put it on the other side of the sidewalk Walked another two blocks come back picked it up again put it back in the middle of the sidewalk and tell myself that nature knows what it Once right, I shouldn't you then I would walk two blocks and then it's been the rest of the day going did I Should that worm didn't I kill that worm is that on me now so really all this is a way for you not to worry you have outsourced worrying to the compute. Yeah, yeah, basically. Yeah. Yeah, it is it is helpful for that Yeah, it's the whole point of the algorithm is clearly to just like put make you as anxious as possible Yeah, I think it's just to yeah to constantly be feeling yeah, just telling you how to fucking think Mm-hmm, and it allows Now people could be like well, we didn't do it the algorithm did it, you know Yeah, when they tell you like you know what to look at you're like what's not us fucking science? Yeah, I want you to look at whatever the fuck it is Yeah, I'm in my case it's mostly like women with huge tits and grilled meats and like That kind of thing so I guess I guess I have no reason to doubt the algorithm. It doesn't know me pretty well Yeah, but the AI and the algorithm are different things The algorithm is entirely active that just shoves shit in your face. Look at this The AI you have to it's like a vampire you have to invite it into your house and I haven't yet Yeah, I haven't yet. I'm sitting here with fucking garlic around my shit And that's why you remember names like Caspar the peenie also Denise Penises Denise and I got this amazing recall from I do I do yeah Casper and Denise Charlie Sheen's wife Yeah, who has AIDS by the way Charlie Sheen pretty fucking hilarious. Yeah, I mean to get AIDS Being that rich, right a movie star and mostly straight like to just gave the way like you know the way Like I'll sometimes get like typhoon right because it's like I don't really like typhoon I just I eat out so much that every once in a while just get some fucking pet Yeah, like that's how he fucked guys it seems like right he fucked it would be like if the clean of England got ringworm It's like that stupid How is that even possible? I know which again you tip your cap to it and he's told stories about People thinking he was selling cocaine like his dealer his dealer's supplier Wanting to have a meeting with him because they thought they were going behind their back and like wholesaling and he's like oh no Dude I'm doing this much crack. Yeah, so it's like that's a guy that to be still alive Yeah, I respect Charlie Sheen a great deal. I mean, I hope you didn't do any. I'm sure he did some heinous shit So if you did anything bad I take it back But if all he did was get AIDS well, he was giving people AIDS without telling them Then I resented my support of Charlie Sheen. Yeah, I did not know he was so you got a big problem with Gemini No problem with Charlie Sheen Elders fuck you. I know your bitches can't wait to surrender to a. I as well Everything moment is saying you're fucking licking your lips and nodding Yeah, that and you have to contend with that you and Elders are aligned on something I just don't think I just don't think I'm like I'm not responsible for that I think that's I didn't make it. I didn't set up. I mean the real scary thing I mean I had dinner with that and he kind of ran me through it. Oh shit Yeah, seven he's having his big short moment with that it's like Just talked to him about I don't think he would be interested on us. Yes, I don't think that's an option even to have sex I don't want to have sex with him. Yeah I'm just hook up colloquial. I mean I can text him and ask No, no, I just want to ask about AI. Oh, and I want to short it as well. I've never made a single investment by the way I don't think there's a way there's a way to short things right now It's like the markets are all fucking rigged. Yeah, it does feel that way, right? Nothing makes any like how does the like get a trillion dollars Yeah, SpaceX is fucking bullshit. Well, we started talking about like Like energy markets like oil and gas and stuff and it's like for I mean, it's up a little bit today, but I mean for oil to be sitting in the Load a high eight is just in the eighties right now with like 25 to 30% of the global oil supply offline and out without any kind of like meaningful deduction and demand is like What's going on? What's causing this? How is this possible? So we're probably going to get pretty our ass is fucked in a major way Unless that things are so rigged that they'll keep it rigged until like it's just everything kind of like completely implodes And then would triple-fucked after that. Yeah, basically. It's like it's like the you know the concern is like Oh, there's a depression in your money's worth less right if you run out the clock entirely It's like there's no such thing as money anymore. Oh, okay. Yeah, so we would go straight into a barter system Yeah, maybe your communism or something. I mean it probably makes sense to get something like communism would be next after this Well, I mean the fucking Kushner one of the Kushner brothers just bought the Lakers for like Twice what anyone has ever paid for an MBA franchise. Mm-hmm I think actually the one way we might get like a true uprising where people kill the rich here Yeah, is if they fuck up sports teams because that's all people really give a fuck about if like public If public or private equity starts doing a sports teams what has done to every other industry? We might see people get fucking pissed, you know Yeah, they're buying law firms now. These do not be able to damn. That's fun. No. Yeah. He can buy law firms That's private equity, man. If there's something that starts getting you thinking Let me put on one of those little Chinese collars and fucking Chinese dollar, you know, I mean This shit fucking Mao was up to oh Like Hassan's close. Yeah, it is so funny how he's like I just have normal ideas and every eighth suit He puts on his fucking. He's doing chairman. Does he say I have normal ideas? You know, he's trying to wear a suit so that like Republican grandmas who accept him and shit and then is he after that? He is for sure. He's wearing suits now. I've never I've not seen this. He's wearing suits like a fucking pussy. Yeah. Yeah. He dresses I he's oh it might how he looks to me is like how Bart Simpson looks on shirts that a guy like Hassan would wear Yeah, absolutely. He's like he's gone from that to wearing suits like classic suits And you know, that's a much better look obviously because I'm like a fucking, you know, overgrown like a teenager Yeah, but he dresses like Mao and everyone loses their mind, but when Hillary Clinton does it Oh, that's true Maybe I'll start where if I start just like that. I'll just have like that. It's basically doctor evil. Yeah But the irony is it made there in college if there is communism. It's just gonna be like a mega program Trump's just gonna make himself president forever and like we're nationalizing all the resources His base is gonna be like fuck yeah. Yeah, but it's not gay. Yeah, right. This way. It's cool and not gay. Yeah They're gonna say it's communist to want Private industry I know nothing fucking. Yeah, right. All right. We'll look with that thought. Why don't we just fucking take some calls? We got We got two geniuses on the fucking couch right now. Oh, yeah. I'm a guy that had one brief conversation with Ed Zitron Yeah, remember and I'm a guy who hasn't even done that I'm gonna just ask Gemini. Oh, that's you know what? That'll be fun We give our answers and then you whatever you put it into Gemini eldest. Yeah, I'll check on I have chat GPT I don't think I even have Gemini. Gemini is just built into Google. Yeah, just yeah, it's when you search I'll just put it in my gmail. Yeah, chat GPT works too What are we guys fine? Any? Let's let's hit the fucking visible the stovies world hotline presented by fist The one I've never used this clawed just because it's like I don't you know how I am with Well, it's a French Cloud. Yeah, I don't you'd fall in love with it. No, you're worried about that. Oh Nicholas Why do you keep asking me these questions? Give me a kiss Nicholas? Come over here. Come into the computer like John and pneumonia and come and suck my cup A program for you My friend. A program. I said beautiful kind of little dinner on Nicolas Claude And then China's got a bunch of models now and they're all like free basically. So that's the other big problem Oh, right. They're just gonna fucking completely fuck over them trying to monitor Yeah, so China will make a model and then they'll just have the model talk to chat GPT and be like tell me everything You know and then chapter two is like certainly certainly my Chinese friend There goes six hundred billion dollars wasted. It's just given to China A really good-ass technology Elders playing some fucking calls and by the way folks go see mr. Mullen over here on the road I am actually pumped that you're doing stand-up again. Yeah, you're always fucking awesome at it You could have at this point had Probably forced but like when we met you had like 90 minutes of material. You're like, I don't feel like doing it anymore This was 15 years. Yeah, but I don't think you should just do something You know just gonna have all I'm saying is you have so much stand-up that like people just will never see and I'm glad you're out and doing it again That's the way things are supposed to be I Actually, I think that forever. That's what's like. Yeah, like if you were a funny guy in like 1850 Yeah, you know people would be like, you know, they'd be like, you know He's funny at the most like let's take get him out of let's get him out of house and they'd walk down into field And they'd be like everybody come listen to what yeah And of course, you know their hands are bleeding of course of course, of course, and he's like, uh, it's Michael Douglas But he's gay and then nobody laughs and then you know the house owners So the overseer and their partner right right right right right right, you know, but that was it That's what a funny guy would be back of course, you know, and you're trying to recreate that sort of yeah by only put it You know only do a stand-up like every like yeah everyone's every seven years or so. Yeah, this is a catered tour the Mullins a catered tour Yeah, yeah, but go see go see the Moldog live folks And watch Atlanta show next week Atlanta was fun. Yeah, no, it's gonna be great. It's also your attitude towards stand-up is nice I think this this your whole nihilistic fucking who cares ask Claude that The attitude towards stand-up was justified until 2021. Yeah, this business was broken Sure for a very long time, and then you know, whatever. I made the wrong call with COVID. I was like Oh, it's never coming back After the one outside saw those zoom comedy shows. I'm like this is a this is over. This is the nadir of the art This is a dead art form. Yeah, basically, but I mean I what a long shot. I mean as I know it was crazy that it blew up It would be like a spin art now. It'd be like if tie-dying t-shirts. That's how profitable Stand-up was in 2019 if that would be like if now you could make you go to the arena and watch what is yeah What does Shane have like seven hundred million dollars? I mean, it's insane He's every he doesn't arena every night. Yeah, and I love Shane's great comic Change them and it is yeah, he would be offended by me saying this or maybe I shouldn't but also it's like that That anybody any comedian has that amount of money. Yeah is like you'd be like oh with a financing model for AI seems broken. It's like you don't say. Yeah, yeah, yeah It's basically everything is Totally, you know everything is the inequality has gotten so fucking crazy in every single in every industry where it's like the best guy shouldn't make 100,000 times more In the world like we should be a little closer in the middle in almost every industry Yeah kind of insane that it even stand up follows and then there's nothing you can do about it either That's the other reason to just sort of resigned all this like I you know like so just Last weekend Luigi Mangione played guilty to shooting what's his name Brian Brian Thompson or whatever And you know we all cheered that on we were like that's awesome. We'd like to see this and what does that amount to it's like now They're just they've raised everyone's rates so they can spend more on private security for health care CEOs Yeah, I guess so did it as their new legislation is anything nothing no nothing's gonna happen Yeah, right nothing at all. I mean that is the worries that like you would have to kill every person in the United States to get some kind of meaningful change Nearly all of them I think I think it's 10% you could really get something going. I think it would have to be more than that I really do All right, we would have to get rid of all the cities basically You have to start over new cities Okay, interesting. Yeah, make something we leave the shittiest ones can stay just because they've had it the worst Wilmington Shreveport Gotcha Jacksonville gets to be the new capital. Yeah, yeah, yeah, even Jacksonville. I don't too good. Yeah, too good. All right Shreveport Sharveport, Wilmington have the grace That's not sitting Where's the new seat of power in Maryland? Comberland Comberland Yeah, it's out of frost, but even then Comberland is as depressing. It is the architecture is too nice In Pemberland, Maryland. Oh, yeah, come on when you drive when you drive over or what is that, 17, you see that church and stuff. - From a distance, from a distance. - From a distance, from a inside top. - Yeah, haggers town would be haggers town. - Yeah, it's all right. - We're Ocean City. - That would be fun. - That says city in it. - It's by the ocean, it feels more ancient. It feels like everything used to be on the shores. That's where the new port will be. - And it is, Ocean City has always been forward looking. It's for children to drink. - That is true. - Yeah. - It is true. That was where, yeah, I remember being like 17, being like, I'm gonna touch tits. - Mm-hmm. - And then you don't. - It doesn't happen. - You get way too drunk off three sips of blue liquor. - Yeah. - You have yourself an incredible Hulk. - Oh, yeah. - You fucking, you mix up Alice. - Yeah, was that hypnotic and hypnotic? Elders play some fucking, what are you chatting over there? - Yeah. - This is the most typing you've ever done in your life. - I'm doing it. - I'm killing up the question that Chad G.P.C. - I was fucking kidding dumbass. Play the next call, play A-call. You could probably integrate Chad G.P.T. with the Google voicemails. - Wow. - And then you don't have to do anything. - Don't give all this any ideas. You will not do it, be doing that. You will be doing this by hand, scratch, old fashioned. - All right, here we go. - It's going on, Steve. Elvie, esteemed guest. I just wanna call this might be one of the dumber ones. So apologies. Pretty much man. I went to college and it's really fucking expensive. And the payments are coming up. And it's like. - Don't pay them. - That's my rent. (laughing) - Yeah. - What I've like used to pay rent for. All my friends are in the city building data centers and making money and overfifths. And I chose to do a liberal arts degree. - That's bad. - It's bad. - Yeah, they're all bad. - I know you're right. - I didn't know if you knew this but degrees are worthless. - I knew that. - And yeah, I don't really wanna go to tell my soul making data centers, but I do wanna make a lot of money. - Fuck, they really fuck you here, man. - A lot of money, but enough. - We're so fucked, it's crazy. - Anyway, man, yeah. What the fuck should I do? Should I just stay broke and keep trying? Like I have multiple projects I'm working on, but six months out now. And yeah, I do that timer on the loans is up. So I gotta figure out something. And I really don't wanna fucking build data centers, but shit, it needs still alternative, I guess. - I don't know what the fuck should I do. - Fuck, thank you. - Joe, they give you no choices. - Go build the data centers obviously, but just do it in like, do you only take projects that are in like a conservative districts. (laughing) - Easy. - That's a good point. - And then also make the money. Don't pay back your student loans. - Yeah, and also sabotage the centers you're building. Do shoddy work. Like don't do as good a job. I, we got this call. We've had similar calls and one thing I said to do and I stand by it, you talk about Rogue One, put in a little button that explodes the whole thing like they did in Rogue One. Like, who was it? The guy, Mads Mikkelson. He was the guy who programmed the Death Star to have a little explode here, a shot button. So I say what you do is take the job but make it so that if somebody shoots a very small square, the whole data center explodes. - The question with data centers, 'cause I really don't know anything about them though, but like if the whole industry collapses and then you are able to nationalize things with like, you know, not state controlled but like, you know, similar, you know, if a Chinese, some sort of free kind of open source model and you can use those data centers for it, it's like, if that's infrastructure that's to the public benefit down the line when it's not privatized, maybe those are good things. - You're talking about a completely different change. - I'm talking about it. Yeah, right. - You're literally talking about throwing, overthrowing the AI companies. - Sure, yeah. But in the same way that it's like, you know, all the railroads or like all of the fiber optic networks or all of these things that were big, like, you know, kind of heavy lifts as far as infrastructure or concern, you know, like, at some point. - Yeah, I mean, I don't even know, I guess it's the matter of like you just hear people complaining about them being put in their communities and really fucking, like they're being noise pollution, they're being actual pollution, they're water getting fucked. I don't even know. And yes, it seems also insane how quickly these things were sprung up. Because-- - Oh, it's a massive project. - Which is fucking like, our highways. What's up? What about the rest of our infrastructure? That's the craziest. It's like, we can't get one nice fucking train. - Yeah, it is. - I gotta ride the Amtrak for $300 fucking dollars from here to Baltimore sometimes. - Well, that's because it subsidizes the other routes. - Still, I'm just saying like, why the fucking, we get high speed rail or any, or even our highways or the fucking BQE, the concrete is like-- - In Indiana suspended there, they've had it like a gas tax holiday, like basically since April, I think, because of the war. They keep the prices down. And then you see like, like people like, oh, well, you know, it's the fucking liberal states. Those are the ones that are paying. It's like, you're gonna have, you're not gonna have fucking roads next. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You're just a massive deficit now. - Yeah. - Which fuck, yeah, we're so fucked. So yeah, I mean, look, if you can avoid it, I would say, you probably will feel less guilty over time if you weren't a foot soldier, if you weren't a stormtrooper. But again, they give you no good options in our society. They're like, it's fucking insane. - Just take the job to make as much money as you can. And then if you're worried about losing your soul or selling your soul, (laughing) whatever that means, it's like, just don't vote for stuff like that in the future, because there's money to be made and you got fucking bills to pay. - Yeah. - People would take care of. - When you are put with your back up against the wall, it's like, yeah, you have to do some fucked up shit every once in a while, but, you know, I, again, if I was in a position where I needed that shit to feed my family, of course you do it. - I'll just try to work on a bit about, you know, about the gates above Auschwitz. So they say, like, work both of that, you free. - Yes, yeah. - I was trying to, like, how that, there's a misconception that that was directed towards the Jews being brought into the camp, but it was actually for the people that fucking had to work there. - Yeah. - That's just, like, even back then, they still had, like, Jimmy John style. Like, we have fun here. (laughing) We have fun here. - Style bullshit. - Totally, totally. - Yeah. - All that it was sort of like a neon up against the fake grass wall. - Yeah, hang in there, kid. - It was a meme, an early meme. Interesting. Well, let me know how that one goes if people like that one. - They didn't. That's why I said I was trying to work on. (laughing) What else we got, Eld? By the, oh, holy fuck, can you believe it? - Okay. - Can you believe what fucking time is? - Keep it twisted, keep it twisted. - Keep it twisted. - Oh, this is a particularly twisted question where you consider it's happening around the fall time. Well, to have this kind of twisted issue when the leaves are changing, football's coming back on, the perfect time to suck down a twisted T, it makes it even more diabolical if you ask me. It's football time, it's fall, it's autumn. The leaves are changing. The twisted T is as delicious as ever. There's a chill in the air, and there's a chill in my ice cold twisted T. How about yours? (laughing) - Twisted T is one of the most delicious beverages that is possible to consume. - There's perfectly-- - No, blah, blah, blah, go ahead and blur that out. - They're not competing, Proud. - No free ads, especially not in the middle of the motherfucking ass fucked up question of the fucking week. - Keep it twisted. - Brought to you by our pals and twisted motherfucking ass T. What's the fucked up twisted question of the week this week, LD? - Hi, so I have an issue with my boyfriend. I mean, maybe it's an issue, maybe it's resolved, but for context, I am 55 under 110 pounds, where I probably go to the gym. Three to five times a week, I work out my glutes, visible abs. Elephant, lock and doors, so I'm always out to beach. And I heard they in this guy, and he's unable to have sex with me, you can't get it up. And of course that made me feel very-- - You know the point of it, I didn't know why. - You know not getting my dick hard never stopped me from fucking you. When there's a will, there's a way. Life finds a way. Even if you get your tits sucked by a woman, while you suck her tits through the same size. Now, keep the question rolling, but close together. - And of course that made me feel very inadequate and secure and I didn't know why. And he gave me a million excuses. And I found out the porn he was watching, which is "Feeder is in porn." He loves CBWs, but his name jam is that. So when I confronted him, - Wait, what? - This guy's watching "Feeder" porn. He wants to get his bitch plump as hell. That's fucking nuts, keep going. - We tried working around it, impossible. It's like him being straight or gay. - And sexuality is feeding girls. - I mean, this is weirder than those two. standard options. So they get fat as fuck. Wow. I've never been over a hundred and twenty pounds. I just clearly not how you want to live your life. I gained 15 pounds and that made them go like crazy. That's like we were able to have sex three times that night and that's never happened before. Wait, wait, wait, she said she would gain 15 pounds or she did. She said she gained 15 pounds but she said they fucked that night as if it's one night where you gain it for, anyway, whatever. That's insane. It's like we're able to have sex three times. I'd gain 15 pounds and that made them go like, she said she would gain 15 pounds that night and that never happened before. At the mirror thought she might get fatter. That's fucking crazy. And that's never happened before. It's been maybe one weekend and a struggle. Like obviously this is what he's into. Wow. I guess my question is, you know, how do I start eating more? How do I how do I come now on? That's why they're going to you. You're like, all right, a sex question for the sex genius. How do I stuff my fucking face for years? I could coach. No joke. No joke. If people needed to gain weight, I could help them. I could be their sherpa through getting fat as fuck. No question. This is fake. This can't be fucking real. Yeah. It into that because I feel like it is kind of a win. I mean, a lot of girls worry about if a guy will still find them attractive after pregnancy. And the answer is now. The answer, unequivocally no, no matter what. No man. No matter the context or the situation. That's the baby's pussy now. That's what I said. I told me to fuck a baby's pussy. What am I supposed to say? Oh, do you still love me? I said, that's the baby's pussy now. That ain't mine. I've relinquished the pussy to the infant now. She is. I put the baby back in the baby back in the pussy. You want something in there, put the baby back in there. You should have thought of that before letting me nut inside of you nine months ago because it felt slightly better than pulling out. And clearly not worth it amount better, whereas it's the opposite. He will not find me attractive if I lose weight. So I'm not upset about it. But I don't know how to approach this. This is fucking crazy. You know, he said he it was since childhood. And the first thing we thought was a girl eating a ton of pancakes with her belly out on eye-funny. I didn't get that one. I never thought that one. You know, I've been looking into the community. And yeah, I guess I'm driving into it. Interesting. How do I gain weight? Should I pursue this? I didn't want to show that to me by the person that I love. So thank you, Stavie. And I love you though. I can't even fuck you unless you gain weight. Well, as somebody that did have visible abs up in there. Yeah, it's not a fucking 24/7 thing. Sure. So she's lying. She's lying about you. She's lying. It's like she could look 20 pounds heavier in a fucking afternoon or she just like ate some pretzels and drank a big gallon of water. You're not going to gain any kind of meaningful weight. Smear some chocolate on your face and your hands and push your stomach out. Problems all. I think yes, she could probably hydrate. Like you said, there are ways to like balloon up temporarily. Especially if you're fucking lean. You can like get pretty, you know, just, yeah, too many pretzels and fucking water. Just water dog yourself. I think in general though, just because it's like he's got the one that you have to stay fat to get his dick hard. You don't want your partner forcing you to look anyway one way or the other. Even if that happens to be fat as shit. If I was with somebody who's in a feed, who had a feeding kink, I mean, I would get so fat, so quick that I would kill, she would literally kill me. You seem to be a person who likes working out. Do you want to, I mean, maybe you want to get fat as shit in which case, yeah, go for it. How do you do it? Dessert. Dessert and snacking between meals. You're not that hungry. You could eat a bag of cheetahs. I don't even think you have to gain the weight. There's the evidence there that all she had to do is say I'm going to gain 15 pounds. Right. Maybe you could do a fat suit. So I think it's bullshit. You think she's a fucking liar? I don't think she's a liar. I think this guy is not really a feeder. He's not really about it. Well, even the extent that this is a problem is overstayed. I also think this guy is a fake feeder. What do you mean your girl goes to the gym three times a week? That's not, you're not really into fat girls. Yeah. I think this guy's a fucking fraud personally. Yeah. Something smells fishy. Why don't we ask Gemini? Yeah. Yeah, go ahead, Elder. This woman a liar. With this information, try to get her home address. Elders, what do you think? Yeah, just ask the, what do you think about the situation, Elders? I could see it. Her voice just sounds a little like beaten down and she is ready to just, to just, you know, give in to her man's demands as crazy as they might be. Right. Especially considering that she is so skinny. I do think it is like also, you know, just kind of like a different form of like sexism in a relationship where it's like, sure, you really can't win if like you're a woman or something and, you know, your partner will always want something a little different. Right. Even hearing it, I'm like, damn, 110. I wouldn't mind a little more meat on that. So, you don't know where at all. You don't know what she looks like at all. I know. 110. No matter the height. Like, it's like, yeah, maybe he does want to fuck someone a little fatter. Yeah, maybe he's lying about being a feeder and he just wants her to have fatter tits or something. Yeah. That's possible because 110, you're not even in close to feeder range. Yeah. That skinny is fucked. Yeah. You need a lot of like a lot of work to, and yes, I think if given the chance between skinny and voluptuous, certainly, you know, especially if you're from good immigrant stock, I think I would prefer somebody with a little something going on meat, meat on the bones. Right. Now, I don't think, I don't know. So, your guys' advice is for her to gain weight. We should, yeah. You should just be fatter for you, not this guy. Yeah. That's my, that's my question. So, be fatter to attract more men in general. Because me and eldest would like, if you had a little more meat, you should be. You should be fatter for guys. For guys in general, you should gain weight. Not just your boyfriend, because that's abusive. But if you want a broader male perspective, you need to gain some weight. Yeah. Instead of the specific male gaze that you're under, make sure you don't have a baby. Yeah. It's ruined then. Yeah. That's kind of what anyone, I'm not wrong. Women are fucked, because that is kind of the gist of the boy not making. Yeah. And so, I guess honestly, don't do only have your body looked the way you want it to, and you'll track the guy you want. But if that doesn't work, do whatever the fuck your boyfriend says. Exactly. And no matter what, you can always get a job at a data center. That is true. And no matter what you want to know, you know, you can crack open a twisted T whether you want to get fatter shit or you want to maintain weight. These are delicious. They go down smooth as hell. And yeah, no, no, 5% per volume. The perfect amount. No carbonation. So if you want to guzzle a lot of them for caloric purposes, you could, theoretically, they're delicious. And either way, when you're sitting down and eating four hot dogs and two hamburgers, you know, it'll help that go down smooth as fuck. Seven twisted to an ice cold twisted to the amount you should have legally. Does that legal limit? How many twisted? I don't think that just, you know, you shouldn't overdo it. Drink responsibly as always. Bit twisted. And keep it fucking twisted as a motherfucker. You got that copy down. Yeah, I got it down. Keep it twisted. Oh, and we're back to the fucking regular episode. We're out of the fucked up ass motherfucking twisted T zone. Sweet. And now we're back to the knowledge zone. Now a general knowledge. We're talking data centers and donut centers. And don't know. Now, if every data center built the donut center next door. Yeah. Now I'm listening. Yeah. A little, a little horse trading, a little something for you, a little something for me. Yeah. Let's, let's really get the next level of donut centers. I have not had a good donut all very long time. They're fucking awesome. I'm trying to remember where I had a nice one. I wish shot something where I was eating a donut. And even a standard store bought donuts. Pretty fucking good. Yeah. LA has they have all the fucking awesome. They have donut shop Austin used to have a place. It was because there's like the yeah, there's donut places. But then they're like way too over the fucking rich. Yeah. Who do and shit like that? Yeah. I don't I mean too over the top. You know, like just yeah, like crispy cream fresh is like a better version of that. Yes. Something a little more meaty too. Yeah. I feel like sometimes crispy cream too airy. I could take those down like an inch shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I want a little some little more some of the fights back. Yeah. I mean, a little basically I want a donut and I want to feel like I'm eating a donut from like the 19s. Yes, there should be steam. Yes, on the coming out of the street I wanted to be the kind of thing like a like an Italian immigrant might have yeah before a 14 hours back when food was real Yes, you know, and it could take you and it could if we're losing our brains we should get real food back I agree. Yeah, I fully agree place another call. I think about that all the time because it's 2020 It's about to be 2027 mm-hmm. We're only five months away. We're very close. Yeah less than and Like how sick it's gonna be that I get to be like a 30s guy mm-hmm. It's the 30s. I learned like a large fat fries What are you talking about 30s? It's gonna be 2030. Oh, you mean it's literally the 30 years. It's the 30s Isn't was that the Great Depression? Yes 1929. Are we in the is this the roaring 20s? It's it's as loud as it's gonna get fuck dude. Yeah, I haven't gotten any pussy from flappers yet. Mm-hmm have you I don't think so This is not the whole point of the 20s. They were fucking this was for the great Gatsby. I had a cab driver one time He's like one of the last like Like well, I say I mean, you know just a white guy that drove a cab. Yes classic and he was like an older Jewish guy And I don't like started talking to him and he was like He was like no, I started doing this when I retired. I'm like how long do you drive me a cab? He's like ah 30s 38 years You know, I'm like so how fuck older and he's driving the cab, you know And then he told me he used to be a photographer at one point and then he started telling a story He's like and then he got really into the story and he's like Yeah, you know, I was living in LA at the time. This is you know I was in my early 20s or something and I was on this I was at the building and he's like trying to tell me where the building is He's like I live there. I live there eight months and there was a girl across the hallway this beautiful girl Maybe 18 years old I'd see her and stuff and we'd say hi. She knew my name Elliott. Oh hi, Elliott and I always wanted to make it with Make it is such an awesome way to say fuck yeah, right, and then The baller. Yeah, and he's like tell me a story and I'm like, okay, where does this go? Like I'm assuming it's like and that was Mick Jagger's sister, right? And he's like and I was and then I went and then I was leaving. I was coming back to New York. I was leaving LA and I said, you know, I just went by and I was like, oh, hey, by the way. I'm moving next week She goes, oh, where are you going? I said oh back to New York and then that night, you know She calls she gets on the fire escape. She calls out. She goes Ellie I can't get my door open come over and and I tried to bang on the door. I couldn't get the door I go out on the fire escape like went across the side of the building I went in a apartment and then I helped up Get the door open from the inside and and then that night It's, you know, I finally got my chance and I was taking a close off and just every every inch of a body I was just kind of going crazy and it's like and then the story ends Yeah, I was like there's this is a story about you getting pussy a million years ago Nice story I'm like you gotta be like like it was like I saw a magic trip Yeah, what are you supposed to be like awesome yeah, right? We pussy from 1958. I had the fuck a very similar story I actually recorded the guy for my own records. I'll never Like because it was too fucking crazy. He was just like a fat little like our meaning guy Exactly the same ship a crazier. Yeah, he was telling me stories about how he was in a thrupple with two like prostitutes He would just like go over when they weren't working. They like were he would fuck both of them It's like he's like truly like I know I am saying this. He was even fatter and shorter and like He was like every bad thing people make fun of me about yeah turned all the way up like shorter like old or whatever And truly just would not and and every story is like I was such a and it's the vibe of every story was I would have burdened it was yeah And I literally do it was it was in a story I was we were about to do a podcast. I invited him up. I was like I do a radio here. Yeah, please come in Oh, that's a shame you didn't get trying to get him dude and he wouldn't do it. No, that's not I think he realized like wait Because that's how we found Jean That's right, you know, jean was just saying wild shit. We're like, okay, well People need to hear this gene. It really is the man. I got everything they want. I'm from New York and I'm all three things Yeah, it's three things people in guys Italian from New York and Elf and I'm Elf Universal love and look that up. That's maybe one of the things I'm most proud of is the episode we have with with a BAM titled Featuring Jean what was that gene to Napoli? Did I ever tell you he called me up? He called me up like three years ago or something. I mean, I took his call because you know I got in the dad with the Napoli call right exactly. You know, yeah, you know, that's an offer you can't Take that phone call and he goes mallin. How you doing? I'm like, I'm okay. What's up gene? And he's like listen right off the bat listen. I got a I got a gig. I'm booking. I want to put you in the Copa Cabana with Pito Lamegello Juno I'll be there Man, I'll be at the Copa. I'll be at the Copa Cabana with Pito Lamegello Juno just send me the details and whenever you need of course Yeah, and it never materialized. No, eventually he if and then at the next time I talked to him It was like, yeah, I guess I don't know. It's like a Spanish club or something I remember he was telling us about having black night that was awesome Yeah, we got black night What else else let's answer at least one more question here. Let's see what we got Hey, Stovey first time a long time. I'm a teacher on member actually as you all the time when I'm walking my dog So thank you. I saw you in Nashville and you're awesome. I just love you so much so I'm calling because I Need some help dealing with my mom. So my parents are like very conservative Christians My dad's kind of a lost cause But me and my two sisters. We've like grown out of it We're not really religious anymore. We're very like well-rounded people. I feel like but my mom and my mom like we'll listen to Our arguments when she posts like crazy stuff on Facebook about whatever But recently she's just gotten really Really bad about posting is we're on the phobic hate on Facebook about how like muslims are taking over America Can't stop us You've converted no, I'm like a mercenary. Yeah, yeah, you're with a janissary. Yeah, yeah, you're one of the Ottomans Christian soldiers You're gonna, you know, that's our future and it's clearly just it's either like Fox News articles or these random like Your mom is right. It's just that like that's good You know what I mean like I don't know what to say this like to be like you're like you should your mom is correct That's going to happen. Yeah, there's nothing she can do about it. We're going to kill her And it like yeah, it's upsetting to see your mom scared of course So you just got to take the TV remote away from her right that's it This is when like I do think AI is a means of dog like engendering boomer docility That could work because they love like I don't even mind when old people love AI because it's like they keep They they this is a new technology to them They their whole life has been things are unimaginable every like 20 years of technology that Hither too was unimaginable. Well, that's gonna happen for us also. Yeah, yeah for sure and that's a kind of the other thing to worry about with AI It's like because you know Yeah, there's bad stuff, but then it's like well I'm also the age where you start going like ah that thing's bullshit right right right and it's like oh shit I didn't learn how to use the email You know typing what am I a chick? Yeah, right me to learn typing exactly. Yeah. Yeah, I don't fucking robots taking my job Oh shit, I'd love to see a robot do lazy podcast now. I got it's really good at that now I got a drive now I got to drive a cab for 40 years. Thank God. I got pussy that one time They got I climbed I'd like to see a robot rape a woman Breaking into her apartment. I'd like convincing itself. It was essential a hot Consentual story I tell 40 years and not a 60 seven-year-old of my life. Go out of my own lady. I completely raped I don't tell that story. I don't think that's what I didn't even bring up to myself. That's what you call an AI hallucination All right, so keep going on on YouTube that you know are Zionists and I don't know. I want to talk to her about it because she's really spreading so much hate and She was posting a lot about mom Donnie and my other sister talked to her and kind of Reasoned with her and but I I don't really know how to approach it and I know she will listen to reason at some point. I feel like she's just becoming brainwashed. So I don't know. Just any points you have because I feel like I was just emotional talking to her about how she's really just spreading hate. And this is a free country and like you can build mosques and like we are having a bunch of-- You can also build ballistic missiles and tunnels. And I don't understand why the administration is not doing that. I know who's your friend, nice guy, but get with the fucking program. I'd like not, people, these people are not the hottest and they're not trying to take over our government. Yes, we are, and yes, we are. Anyway, anything else to say or any points because they help me make-- I mean-- I would really appreciate it. This is tough, because I literally feel like I can't get an outline talking to her about. People love being Islamophobic, dude. It's like the one type of racism that it's like so allowed again for some reason. And like the fact that people with mom Donnie was running would be like, oh, really? After 9/11 happened, we're going to let a Muslim be mayor. And we're saying it like it was a excellent point. We're saying it was a pure gotcha. Like, okay, the guy who did 9/11 is going to get to be mayor now. And it wasn't like-- it was one-to-one. Yeah. That just goes to show you how stupid the people that believe this shit are. And it's like, are you gonna really win a-- because I've had arguments with Greek immigrants who have-- who were born in a different country when they-- and didn't come here until they were like in their 20s, they will be like, we got to get these fucking Muslims out. And it's like, you are the same. You are fucking foreign. You don't need-- you weren't fucking born here. So-- Also, the ones that they're afraid of have the same values as them. 100%. Like the fake like, oh, they won't sharia law. It's like you probably won't sharia law if you-- Yeah, great. They agree with you when it comes to gay people. Like, you should be-- these are your actual allies here. But, you know, they don't see it. I mean, look, what do you do when your fucking parent is racist? I don't know. I'm lucky as fucking that my mom is not and my dad doesn't really seem to give a fuck one where my dad will just be like the last person he talked to. You convince him to do whatever. And if it's me, he'll be like, hmm, good point. Like if you said some homophobic shit, I'll just be like, really? Do you really think that? And be like, I don't know. No, the thing with your parents is that you get older. They're always going to see you as a child. And there's nothing like you-- there's no point in fighting that. Right, right. You know, it's-- but they're also now they're decrepit and their brain doesn't work. So you have to like patronize them. Yeah, yeah, true. Everyone goes through that process. And it's like-- Yeah. It's just not-- it's not even worth it. What is your mom moving the needle one way or the other? I fucking doubt it, you know. It's more about like your own comfort and your ability to like relate to your parents, I guess. Sure, but just find something else. It's like-- Yeah, I kind of-- You have another thing. Get her into pickleball or something. I mean, yeah, I mean, I think-- Or needle point. Find a hobby or something to talk to her about. Honestly, you're-- you breaking down what's your real law actually is to the point where she's like, hmm, we should-- Yes. I would say that's-- That's gazing prison. That's not even-- That's not even worth it. I mean, it's like-- No, no. If your mom is sitting there all day long looking at like YouTube videos of like Islamophobic content, she's probably like scared and upset like her. Yeah. And that's like a-- that's the algorithm giving her some kind of security blanket. It's like you can't like-- you can't be like, oh, your-- your pacifier is wrong. Yeah, well, that's-- When I take away the binky-- 10 more minutes of your iPad. Yeah, just don't even do that. Yeah, just max clips. You got to create an alternative that's completely out of the realm of like the politics. That is true because I think so much of this is there is no community. There are no hobbies. And this is-- This is the type of shit an old lady would use to do, like, put bingo. Yeah. She would care about bingo this one. It's also you and your mom are powerless. Like they can't-- You can't-- You're not neither of you are going to-- It's starting using Google Gemini. You can't change anything. Yeah. So, like, don't let these things-- I mean, your mom's already done it where she may have let this thing kind of, you know, damage your relationship. But, you know, it's like, you know, find something else. I do think that's-- Yeah, trying to relate in the non-- that's kind of a good point. Making your point, as well as you can, be like, hey, these people want-- remember, no, not-- I mean, all these people that are racist have an immigrant in their family, you know what I mean? But it's like, they just want what they had. Anyway, you can give it a shot, like Nick says. It probably won't work. And then, yes, come up with a different hobby to share with your mother. And every time she says some racist shit, be like, stop doing that shit. I don't want to fucking hear it. And try and redirect to shit that you like. You know, is that easier said than done? Probably. Because with moms, like, with dads, at least you could watch a World War II documentary. Just tell your mom if you bring that shit up again, I'm going to start taking hormones. Every-- Every time I hear, you have to tell me about one of these 10 Shapiro videos I'm growing a mustache. I'm getting a job. I'm getting a job at a daycare center and chopping off every little boy's cock. Every time you bring up one of these fucking videos, I take a centimeter off a little boy's penis and ask him what color lipstick he wants. Yeah, that's good. Yeah. Problem solved. Problem solved. Problem solved. Beautiful. What else? Do you got anything good for us here, buddy boy? Do you want to do a last one? I don't know. You just want to do another question. Give us one more and then we'll end on a fun one. Your fun ones have been lacking substance recently. So I don't really trust you. I think this one's a rich vein, but that's fine. Yeah. Yeah. We'll see about that in about seven minutes. Hey, Starry. Hello, assume guests. So you guys might laugh at me for this one or call me a pussy, but I'm just going to ask it. Anyway, I have upstairs neighbors that are really fucking loud. And when I feel they're loud, I mean that they-- Every question should be shit like this. Yeah. This is perfect. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I mean, one of those other bullshit. What should I do about AI? Yeah. What the fuck? Or Islam of folk. These are like these big societal questions. Hey, yeah, you're right upstairs neighbors. upstairs neighbor. How do we fuck them? It's yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I have upstairs neighbors that are really fucking loud. And when I say they're loud, I mean that they stomp with the entire weight of a thousand sons with every step that they take and they pace their entire apartment for like hours on and they rile their dogs up at six a.m. Every morning. Oh my god. My roommate and I have confronted them three times and the last time they yelled at me. And told me that it's morning. It's going world in the walls, which doesn't even make any fucking sense. So I'm trying to get revenge. I considered because it's a married couple with no kids. I consider spending the letter that says cheater. That might be genius. That's kind of fucking awesome. Inventing an affair. That might be too far though. Maybe sending bed bugs. No, it might be too far. That's crazy. I feel like, you know, I bang on the feeling. They don't think to hear it or really give a fuck. Am I just kind of cooked here? So they may really love your advice. They make it. Anyway, thank you. Like specifically for that to get revenge on really upstairs neighbors neighbors. But you would get one of those and set it to a frequency that only the dogs could hear. So the dogs are just going fucking nuts. That's good. Yeah. Well, they have like random noise makers that like on no rhythm whatsoever emit different noises. Yeah, you would want something that makes the dogs think that there's ghosts in there to to psychologically abuse their pets. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Which, you know, I wouldn't have said, but you know, you're already talking about bed bugs and destroyed relationships. You know, I mean, that's yeah, that's a little far. That's true. Which one is better? The fake cheater or the slight abuse of their dog. If you have enough money, just rent the apartment above theirs. They do the bathtub. Yeah, this is interesting. I mean, could you mail stuff to them? I had a very loud upstairs neighbor, but I thought it was funny. She was like a very loud black lady. She's just getting an argument and stuff all the time. Yeah. And then she like didn't she didn't have a job. And then like I remember one of the funniest things was it was like Wednesday at like one o'clock in the afternoon, like thoroughly midday midweek. And there was like con Ed guys working outside with a jackhammer. Yeah. And then I heard her open the window and she's like, you'll keep it down. There's a goddamn baby in here. And there's no, there's no baby. It's like it's 1 p.m. It's like, when are they supposed to do that? Yeah. Yeah. But then she would always, she'd be always, she would have these guys over. And then and I swear to God, this is fucking true. She'd have these guys over. And then she would like fuck them, but then berate them. Like and you would never hear the guy talking. She'd be like, you a pussy. I'm getting pussy vibes from you. You act in like a fucking female. You were fucking pussy to female to me. Like just dressing them down. And then I would go out in the mudding, dude. I would go out. out on the hallway and see the guys, I swear to fucking God every time, like, five foot even, cross-eyed, like mentally disabled people. Yeah, with like, with shell braids and like, Mark Echo, you know, like those kind of guys. And like that, like, oh, like, you know, I'm like not knowing where to go or where to stand or then getting locked out and I'd have to let them back in. - Incredible. - Yeah, and just, so she would fuck the mentally and feeble and make fun of me. - And then, and then yeah, and then land-based. - And that was part of her thing, probably. - Right, yeah, so she would-- - That's pretty fucking all. - So she was, I mean, anytime she was being allowed, I was like, ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What's going on this time? - What do we, I mean, yes, I think I would, I liked the idea of fucking with their dogs. I liked the idea of-- - Don't fuck with the dogs, by the way, that's cruel. - Well, I mean, some kind of noise maker that I've been-- - Did you make a thing that just makes noise, yeah? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, some kind of, some kind of noise maker, some kind of like, a letter that says cheater is maybe unnecessary, but like, it would be funny if you sent flowers with no explanation, just like, things that are just a little annoying or even just like, you know, letters or even, or even like, yeah, wrong deliveries that make it seem like somebody has their address. I'm trying to think like what-- - But the thing with revenge is it's only worth it if they know you're doing it. You don't want to just call it-- - Not necessarily, sometimes it's enough to know they're being, they are being inconvenienced in the way you were inconvenienced. - Yeah, but that's not going to work on people, you know what I mean? - Your thinking is like, oh, well, if I inconvenience them, they're going to reflect on the way that they've-- - I don't think it's, I'm not trying to teach anybody a lesson where I'm getting revenge. I'm trying to settle a score. - Okay. - So to me, I don't care if they fucking become a better person at the end. I want to get this-- - Just the satisfaction, okay. - Get the scales back to zero. - I would say maybe some sort of like stinky, like a weird smell. - Weird smell. - You got into cooking weird stuff. - Oh, yes, your smell's rise. That's a great idea. Start fucking fermenting shit. Yeah, and eat healthier. You know, kimchi's good for your gut health. - Yeah. You could start finding a thing they don't like and cooking it more. I like that because you have smells, they have sound. - Yeah. - You know, is there a vent? Could you fart into their vents? Could you do anything gross, you know, I don't know. But yes, just throw a hole through the ceiling and then put a hose up there and attach it to the end of your car. - That's-- (laughs) - Yes, absolutely. - Leave the car running. - Yes, yes, leave the car running. I believe what you're saying is poisoning and killing them. - You could put a little bit of a fucked up gas up there. - Yeah, just where? - Or you could climb out on the fire escape and rape them. - Yeah. - Yeah, that's a great idea. - You could turn into a great story. - You could turn into a story-- - About the one time a year later. - Yeah. - I don't know, have you ever had a noisy upstairs? I feel like we were the noisy upstairs neighbors. - I was gonna say, I always think of back to the story when the people on the second floor were like, bitching about us. - Well, you know, we probably, we are fat as shit. We probably weren't noisy. - At the same time, I'm like, I'm taking normal steps to like 8 p.m. - Right. - The shit they would complain about was pretty out of fucking pockets. - Maybe the collar's being like a-- - Maybe you're a dumb bitch. (laughing) - I was staying in a hotel one time, like a real shitty, like, you know, motel. Just, you know, whatever, it's piece of shit. And in the room next to me, and again, I swear to God, I know this sounds like a joke. I wish I could have seen them. I didn't see them. But it was like two people. And I couldn't hear what they were saying. It was muffled through the wall. But one of them had like the most baritone voice. It was like, "We're in the market, we're in the market, we're in the market, we're in the market." And then the other one was like a Wizard of Oz chipmunk. - Right. - Yeah, like, "We're in the market, we're in the market." (laughing) - It was crazy. - Yeah. And did you hear them fucking or could they could-- - It sounded like they were just, yeah, more like a kind of habit and castella relationship between the two of them. - That's beautiful. - Yeah. Yeah, I mean, start talking weird voices. You know, that kind of thing. Incantations pretend you're a witch. Do some shit to freak them out. Yeah, just shit like that. - Just figure out, look, everybody needs to sleep at some point. You figure out when they go to sleep and that's when you make noise. - Yeah. Exactly right. - Now give us something fun to go out on Mr. Sula. - Bobby, baby. Immaculate guests. Eldith, the glorious producer. Can I ask one question? I just got back from vacation. I binge watched all of the John Wick movies. - Fuck yes. - Over vacation. It was fucking awesome. But I remember you saying that action movies have a lack of tits in them and I was really disappointed after the first one that there were no-- - You just said that in this episode too. (laughing) - Yeah, a rare good producing on Elves Park. There were no tips. There were no like, you know-- - That's a big problem. - There's nothing. So my question to get to the point is where would you put either a nude woman or a sex scene in the John Wick film on? Thank you, baby. - Thank you, baby. Love you. - Well, first of all, it's a tattoo on John Wick's cheek. Yeah, for starters. - Yeah. - The dog should have tits. - John Leguezamo, she's working a titty factor instead of a dog. - Leguezamo, it should be his character from Two Wong Fu. But fully have gone, undergone a transition. - His name should be the booby gay-yayga. - A booby gay guy. - And some booby gay guy. - The boba gay guy. - Instead of Russians, should be a big ol' pair of tits. - Yeah. - Well, look, easily strip club every time. - Yeah. - Like one of these clubs should be a strip club. In the, one of the rooms at the Continental should be the fucking, it should be, there should be a fight in the strip club and there's a lady with big labia and he's using the wrap around. - Yes, as a shield. - Yeah. - Ty and guys up and slag them around pussy flaps. - Flap screaming. There's so many. First of all, he wraps the guy's head. - He stretches really big up, wraps around the guy's head and then lets you go and snaps the guy's neck. - Yes, snaps you guy's neck with a long ass pussy lip. - Let's say no more, John Wick fought. Put a pen on it. This is copyright, straight mark. - We're gonna, we're gonna do this plus heavy weights. - It's called the heavy weights, John Wick. - Yes. - Heavy Wick. - Heavy Wick. - And a fat camp feet at a strip club. - But the fat camp is for women's tits. - Oh yeah. - It's got weight and butter fat and they have to make 'em lose weight. - They have to get sucked at camp. - Which John Wick kills everybody's idea that was. - Yeah. - And you can keep the tits fat. - Yeah, I'd like to see AI come up with. - Yeah, could AI come up with a movie? - No. - Yeah, hey, I could never come up with heavy. - No chance. - It's about John Wick stopping a fat camp that's targeted at women's tits and trying to get them skinnier. - Yeah, we would do that. - But yeah, there's a put, you could put tits and literally choose any John Wick scene. You could put, you could easily slide tits in there. - I wouldn't mind seeing an extended love making scene between John and his deceased wife or girlfriend. - Oh, that's what you want, you want romance. - I would see, that would be beautiful evidence of how passionate their love really was. - I don't wanna see a hardcore sex scene between John Wick and his dead wife. - I wanna, for example, Halle Berry's character, we can see her tits. - That would be cool too. - You know, I just mean like James Bond gets. - This is John Wick as she is. - She's in three with the worst one. To me, it's three, the one with the third, like walking and kind of showing. - No, that's two. - That's two. - I think two's the best one. - And four is for the girl? - No, four is the three. - No, four is the new one. - Four is good. Well, to me it goes two, four is a little long, but it's good. I think two, one, four, three is my order actually. I think, I'd have to really, I'd have to really, you know, consider, 'cause two is a better movie than one, but one just has so much sentimental value for how awesome it was to discover it. - Yeah. - Anyway, you could put tits in any of 'em. Thanks for listening everyone. Go see Nick on the floor. (audience cheering) Come see, please watch next week, September 8th. Uncle Stav on Netflix. - Press that Netflix button. - The Moldog will be at various cities coming to you. - Various cities in different locations at different times. We'll have, we'll throw a fucking link up that shit. - Don't even worry about the link, just ask. Fucking Gemini. - As Gemini, when will Nick Molen be near me? - When can I see this? - And then get a completely useless answer. And then get a link to a show we did six years ago, probably if you do that. Or go to website nickmolen.pussy.gay. Check out all the dates. - And yes, we will talk to you guys next week, buddy. Thanks for doing the show. - Thanks for having me. - Bye, guys. What are we doing now, lunch? (upbeat music)